#so its like now im even less of a real person than i was bwfore cause none of the fake social interactions in my head even involve me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

playingonedchess · 1 month ago

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that feeling when you dont care about something anymore and youre just indifferent now so you dont even feel sad or anything but you think you should be, you just dont have the actual ability to feel emotions and its all just blank

#like i barely think about school that much anymore and that includes my old friends #i used to be really hung up on it all cause i never had any friends after that or talked to anyone there was nothing to move on to #so i just kept thinking of those people as my friends to at least imagine i had people to talk to #even at uni id still do this and it wasnt really the actual people anymore just the idea of them as people to talk to #but thered still be emotional significance to them even though they were just ideas #but now theres nothing anymore it seems #its inevitable of course but weird #especially cause all my no friend coping mechanisms are now completely fictional and not even vaugely related to my real life #so its like now im even less of a real person than i was bwfore cause none of the fake social interactions in my head even involve me #and its weird cause i swear i feel way less depressed than when i was like 17 then i was always feeling miserable #now i barely ever feel depressed and i genuinly seem used to being totally isolated from human interaction outside of #going to uni classes and barely interacting definitely not meaningfully

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