#so itll shrink a lil bit

[typheus]

Front panels are done!

[mik-mania]

Hey mik! what's the process you use to make lands? They all look super amazing btw

i follow this tutorial but i dont follow it word-for-word

here i can do a quick lil thang

i like to use photoshop for this, idk how to translate it to other programs

i start w a canvas 1000x1000pixels, that way u can get a lotta detail in and then it looks even better when u inevitably shrink it for whatever ur using it for

use shape tool to make a circle. hold shift + click while dragging the tool to make a perfectly symmetrical circle. (or dont im not ur mom)

merge the shape layer down onto a raster layer.

turns into

now ur basically just adding textures n shit. i like doing it Hussie Style and using google images to add texture, basically just taking that shit and bastardizing the hell out of them through fucking around w/ the contrast/exposure/colors/etc. u can also use the photoshop generative tool to generate random texture shit (i love putting in nonsensical prompts to confuse the hell out of it--my favorite results are the really shitty ones that look like terrible collages), but its the same process for each one.

lets make up a planet. Land of Horns and Thorns.

i like to use satellite images to get that planet-y texture. i try to think of a relevant land-type. thorns are triangular, so are mountains. lets grab this image

next what we're about to do is called "transformative use"

copy+paste image on a new layer

right click on the image's layer, select "create clipping mask"

this should be the result:

but its a little flat. so lets make it rounder. i use the Liquefy tool in photoshop, but im sure theres other ways of doing it.

click filter > liquefy, then make sure u have the bloat tool selected. now bloat that mfer to ur liking. its ok if it looks a bit shit right now. when uve bloated it as much as u want, click ok. now u have smth like this

now start messing w/ filters and colors. i try to ascertain the mood im going for with a planet. Land of Horns and Thorns sounds a bit whimsical, but maybe subtly dangerous? so, translating that to color, maybe it's fun and colorful, but like, in the same way those deadly poisonous frogs are fun and colorful. maybe there will be some dark pits as well. lets see what we can do

i start w/ messing around w/ contrast. go to image > adjustments > brightness/contrast. fuck around w it to ur liking. this is what it looks like now

already we're starting to get some of those dark pits i wanted. lets make the colors pop a little more by messing w the exposure.

u can also mess w/ the vibrance, hue, saturation, etc. basically all those lil tools in the image > adjustments are ur best friends now. i like to increase the saturation to get that shit-jpeg look u see in homestuck sometimes

now create a new layer. we go back to google images. im gonna look up some closeups of thorns

this works fine. copy & paste. create clipping mask. bastardize the image however u want, similar to the first one. using the liquefy tool helps to get shit into place where u want it.

made it a little more abstract.

played w/ the color settings. i dont want this one to be as vibrant b/c im going to be using the layer modes. however, i do want to posterize the hell outta this

ok i like how it looks in luminosity mode.

however, i kinda wanna change the colors of the bottom layer now. lets use a gradient map (image > adjustments > gradient map). just hit ok when the prompt comes up, we can detail it in the side panel.

if u just click the actual gradient bar itself, itll open up the gradient editor. there u can make ur own custom gradient and specify the colors n shit. theres also a bunch to choose from.

so, i think that looks pretty fucking cool. i love the contrast, but i kind of want to see what it looks like in other colors too. we head to the hue/saturation tool.

there, i like that. a bright, poisonous color with the threatening blotches of red. now lets make this mfer look like a planet. merge everything into one layer if ya want

the gradient tool is now ur best friend. i like to fuck w the gradients, one of my favorite effects is making a sorta halo gradient (basically just copy the opacity controls i have, im sure u can also google how to do it) and merge the gradient to an empty layer

and, yknow, just mess with the settings

u can add gradients to make it look more like a 3d object. mess w the colors and settings n shit

we add some clouds now. i just use 1px pencil tool. try to use the curvature of the planet to inform how u draw the clouds. think about how u want them to be formed (swirling around the center? stretched out? etc) and think about what u think the atmosphere would be like on ur planet. a completely barren planet like mercury may have no clouds at all. or maybe its like jupiter, where its nothing but clouds? also think about the anemology of the planet. how do the winds form, what directions do they go?

i think the Land of Horns and Thorns sounds like a place that would have a good amount of thunderstorms, so lets make the clouds black. mountains are pretty windy, so maybe the clouds will sporadic but dense.

fuck around w/ it til ur tired of looking at it. then make that fucker smaller (the average mspa panel is 650x450. unless ur planet is taking up the entire page, u can probably get away with smt smaller.) **make sure u have interpolation set to bicubic or nearest neighbor.

and then ur done.

side notes: literally do whatever u want tbh, u can do as many layers as u want, use whatever tools u want. thats pretty much the basic format ive got.

[poisonouswritings]

Omgmgmggmg!! Imagine: post time skip, at the camp, Tulsi is able to convince Sage that him and MC should have some alone time, so she helps him arrange a little temporary camp spot a little ways away from the main camp, just for him and MC. Now in order for this to be a surprise, Tulsi tells MC that he’s gone rouge, which totally freaks them out bc they are worried about him so MC runs to find him and when they do, Sage is just trying to get the fire started outside the tent. What else???

Hehehehe skrunkly man gets a break for once

GN!Reader, kitty cat gets kisses

Sorry I just find it so funny that you're freaking out and you rush into the clearing with the Astrolabe drawn and tears in your eyes and yelling 'S A G E EVERYTHING IS GONNA BE FINE DONT PANIC ITLL MAKE IT WORSE' and Sage is just poking at a bundle of sticks like 'hey babe do you have any tin- WHY ARE YOU FREAKING OUT' and then his fur goes all poofy and he hops to his feet and pulls out his sword because What's Happening?? Are you okay??? Because Tulsi didn't tell him what ruse she was gonna use

Anyways it takes you guys a couple of minutes to calm down and get everything sorted. You share a bit of a laugh because Yeah Tulsi Would Do That What A Bitch (Affectionate)

Sage has like,, fish or something,, he wants to cook you dinner but he hasn't been able to get the fire started. If you can use a itty bitty bit of magic to do it that would be helpful :3

While he cooks he talks to you about how this was all Tulsi's idea. He's happy he listened though. But he's still a little on-edge. You can see it in the twitch of his ears and the readiness of his shoulders and the way his hand is never too far away from his sword. His eye flicks along the treeline incessantly. You finally end up telling him he could do a better job of keeping watch if he was using both eyes. And you pair that with a cute little smile?

....... he's shy but he unties his eyepatch. You can coo and give him little smooches on that side of his face. He's still very self-conscious but when you say he looks hot or whatever it makes him feel all tingly.

Okay but imagine you take his eyepatch,, and you,,, cause it's just a long strip of fabric right?? So you take his eyepatch and you tie it around your neck in a bow and he asks what you're doing and you smile and say that,,,, that after all this time being alone like this is like a vacation right? and you're,, his gift,,,, and he just fuckin,,, he fuckin dies.

Like I think as soon as you say that you can see the tension melting off him a lil' because you're so cute and he really missed you and it's just the first time you guys have been able to enjoy being together and of course you have to be all cute and flirty

The longer you guys are out there the more he calms down. I think it also helps a lot if you sit next to him. He's gonna wind his tail around whatever part of you is closest. Talks to you as he cooks. There isn't a lot about the last 6 months that he's eager to share but he'll tell you a few things if you ask. He downplays the nightmares and the danger but it's still not pretty. I think he starts getting kinda down on himself - curling his shoulders in, ears flattening, shrinking down and bristling out - but you can ease him out of it by bumping your shoulder against his a little. Maybe kissing his cheek. That'll shut him up.

After eating,, you can ask him if he wants to train,,, and at first he takes it v seriously but when you start playing around and sliding up against him and !! Oh!! It's Like That Is It?? and when he realizes what you're doing I think it's the first time in a long time that he's laughed so earnestly and been so relaxed. You two play around for a little bit like that. He's shy at first - it's not like he's been doing much flirting in the last six months - but he likes it when you take the lead anyways.

I assume you guys are near the lake. Once he's feeling comfortable with the surroundings and a little more confident, he might suggest a bit of nighttime swimming!

So Chapter 14,, in the tent, the night before the battle, the unpaid option is basically you guys flirting and you saying you're gonna 'distract him' and,,, anyways what I'm saying is I definitely assume y'all fucked and all I'm saying is you can go skinny dipping but leave the bow on 'cause you're his present :3

[nyctolovian]

Trust

Merry christmas, Sincere! So hi im ur secret santa hahahaha! I know it’s kind of weird to have a sickfic for christmas but I rly tried to write something christmassy and ummmm yeh as u can see it didnt work out hahaha! Hope u still enjoy it with its fluff!! 

Summary: Trucy is running a fever while Mr Wright's at a trial so Apollo takes on the nursing duty. But health issues aren't the only issues Apollo will help with today.

AO3 Link

“Trucy has a fever?”

Upon hearing that, Apollo and Athena turned away from the client to look at their boss concernedly.

“Mm. ... Yes. … Oh... But I’m in the middle of a trial...” Mr Wright glanced at the clock. They only had five more minutes before the trial began again.

Eyes wide with worry, the client stared at him, wordlessly begging him not to leave. At that, Mr Wright flashed her a smile that assured her that he will be staying.

“I’ll ask someone to head over to fetch Trucy on my behalf,” Mr Wright spoke into his phone. “I’ll text you that person’s number. ... Yes. Thanks.” He pressed the “End Call” button before pulling his two protégés aside. “Well, you guys heard it. Trucy’s school called and she’s running a fever. And I can’t exactly leave halfway. Could one of you help me out?” he said with a sheepish grin. “I’d usually ask Edgeworth but he’s in Germany now...”

“I’ll go,” Apollo said, raising a hand. “Our client seems to need some help managing her fear, doesn’t she?”

“She does,” Athena affirmed. “It’s making her mess up a lot of her statements.”

“Then, it’s decided. I’ll go.”

Mr Wright wrote down something on a notepad and tore the page out. “This is the school’s address.” He handed Apollo the note and patted his shoulder. “Thanks for your help, Apollo. I’m counting on you to take care of her till the trial is over. I trust you’ll be fine though.”

The bailiff called the defense back to the courtroom and the defendant jolted in fear. Calmly, Mr Wright turned to her and comforted her. Athena held the defendant’s hand and squeezed it comfortingly.

Apollo glanced back as the three of them headed back into the courtroom before heading out. He took a look at the note Mr Wright had passed to him. The school wasn’t far from here. He quickly reached there by bus and got a visitor’s pass from the security guard before heading to the reception area.

“Hi, I’m here to pick up Trucy. Trucy Wright?” he told the receptionist.

“Ah, she is in the sickbay. I’ll wake her up,” the receptionist said.

Apollo pursed his lips. Was Trucy asleep? This fever seemed to be doing a number on the usually energetic magician. And he was right. As Trucy walked out of the sickbay, she looked incredibly exhausted, slinging her bag over her shoulder.

“Oh! Polly?” Her hand flew to her mouth. “You’re here?”

“Uh, yeah. Your dad’s in the middle of the trial so I’m here instead,” Apollo explained. He glanced over her quickly before gently tugging at her bag. “I’ll carry that for you. You look terrible.” For a moment, Trucy stubbornly tightened her grip around the strap. But Apollo was just as stubborn and she was feeling tired after all so she let go and sat at one of the benches.

The receptionist took out a form and told Apollo to fill it up so Trucy could sign out. He nodded and quickly filled it up. When he gave it back to the receptionist, her eyes widened in surprise. “You’re her coworker?”

“Um... Yes?” Well, technically I’m her employee but that’d be harder to explain. Apollo thought, cringing internally.

The receptionist laughed good-naturedly. “You two look so alike. I almost thought you were her brother! So you are a magician as well?”

“No, I’m not her brother,” he said, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. “And I’m not a magician either. I’m a defense attorney. See?” He lifted his lapel.

“Polly, are you flashing your badge again?” Trucy asked from behind him.

“... No.”

The receptionist giggled as she filed the form away. “You two really get along well. Thank you for picking her up.” She craned her neck to look at the sick girl. “Rest well, Trucy!”

Seeing how tired Trucy was, Apollo got an Uber to take them back to the Wright Anything Agency.

As soon as they got in, Trucy started to nod off. However, when her head began to droop, she would suddenly straighten up again and the cycle would repeat.

“Just close your eyes,” Apollo said, leaning towards her. “You’re tired, right?”

“Ey, lass, y’ sick?” the Uber driver boomed, peered behind.

“Please look in front while driving,” Apollo reminded.

“Yep,” Trucy replied. “Fever.”

The driver nodded and turned his body slightly to look at her. “Thought so. Take forty winks, lil’ lady.” (“Oh god! Please look where you’re driving! Car! Car!”) Yer brother there can wake y’ up when we reach.”

“He’s not my brother,” Trucy said with a slight pout. “He’s just Polly.”

“Ey! Sorry ‘bout that! Y’ two got the same face!” the driver guffawed so loudly the car seemed to be shaking. Apollo clung to the roof handle for his dear life.

“Why do so many people say that?” Trucy mused aloud. “My friends in school say that too. Remember that time when I forgot my umbrella, Polly?”

Gulping, Apollo nodded. He won’t be remembering that any longer if the driver kept turning around to talk to them. “Alright, nice. Can you please nap now? No talking while napping,” Apollo said, patting her head. At least then Trucy won’t goad the driver into talking again.

“Good night,” Trucy muttered absently as she curled up in her bed.

“Good night,” Apollo replied even though he knew that was a weird thing to say at 10am. As he sat at the living room, he texted Mr Wright.

You: Trucy’s home now. She’s running a fever of 38.5 degrees. [10:34 AM]

Tentatively, he peered into Trucy’s room. Apollo felt pretty useless as he watched her tossing and turning uncomfortably. Never had he been needed to take care of someone else with a fever. And usually when he was sick, he’d just sleep it off.

Surely, he shouldn’t just be telling Trucy to sleep and leaving it at that. He frowned in thought for a while and paced around. Then, he picked up his phone again.

You: im taking care of trucy cos shes got a fever. 38.5 but wth do ppl usually do for fevers??? [10:39 AM]

The reply was almost instantaneous.

spaceman: Oof [10:39 AM]

spaceman: Give her water [10:40 AM]

spaceman: And paracetamol or watever [10:40 AM]

spaceman: Put a wet towel on her forehead [10:40 AM]

You: im not sure where mr wright keeps his medication stuff though. i asked trucy and she doesnt know either [10:40 AM]

You: shld i ask mr wright??? [10:40 AM]

spaceman: Yeah. Do that. [10:41 AM]

You: not sure when he can reply. hes at a trial now [10:41 AM]

spaceman: Ohhhhhhh [10:41 AM]

spaceman: No wonder ure the one taking care of her [10:41 AM]

spaceman: Good luck bro!! Dont die!!! [10:41 AM]

You: ok tks i wont [10:41 AM]

spaceman: Btw for the towel, get a basin so u dun need to run abt [10:41 AM]

You: k [10:42 AM]

After sending a message asking Mr Wright where he kept his medications, Apollo placed a cup and a jar of water on Trucy’s bedside table. With a bit of nudging, she finally sat upright to down an entire glass of water before sinking back into her bed with a flop. Then, he followed what Clay said and got a basin of water and a towel. Apollo soaked the towel and wrung it before placing it on Trucy’s forehead.

Apollo noticed the minute relaxation of her facial muscles so he supposed he was doing this right at least. Thank god for Clay. What would he ever do without him?

Feeling his phone vibrate in his pocket, Apollo picked it up again.

spaceman: AND SOUP OR PORRIDGE [10:53 AM]

spaceman: FOR LUNCH [10:53 AM]

spaceman: Im kinda assuming mr wright wont be back before lunch cos ure usually MIA for almost an entire day when uve got a trial [10:54 AM]

You: good idea [10:54 AM]

spaceman: Careful not to drop the entire bottle of pepper in the pot again. Itll kill the poor girl. Her dads a lawyer, apollo. Dont risk it ;-;[10:54 AM]

You: THAT WAS ONE TIME [10:55 AM]

spaceman: Tell that to my poor tongue :( [10:55 AM]

You: I GET IT STOP [10:55 AM]

spaceman: RIP Clay Terran’s tongue. 2004-2024 Death by pepper poisoning. [10:55 AM]

You: ITS TIME TO S T O P [10:55 AM]

spaceman: Dont. Stop me nOOOOWWW [10:55 AM]

You: why r u quoting queen in 2027 [10:56 AM]

spaceman: Why r YOU quoting filthy frank in 2027 [10:56 AM]

You: why r we even friends [10:56 AM]

spaceman: What do u mean?? This is precisely why we r friends [10:56 AM]

spaceman: IVE BEEN CAUGHT MY PHONE NOOOOOOOO [10:56 AM]

You: wow. a murder right before my eyes. ngl i feel nothing for ur death. [10:57 AM]

spaceman: Aura speaking, apollo, stop texting clay while hes at work. [10:57 AM]

You: Noted. Sorry. [10:57 AM]

“Trucy, please get back in bed,” Apollo said. “You’re still sick.”

“My fever’s gone, isn’t it?” Trucy said, puffing her cheek, as she continued to carry things out of the fridge to be defrosted.

“Well, yeah,” Apollo said. “But you’re not completely well yet. The sick should stay in bed to rest.”

“Do you even follow your own advice?” Trucy said, arms akimbo.

“Yes?” Apollo tried, rubbing his bracelet.

The piercing look Trucy gave him made him shrink back. Lying was futile. She could perceive lies too after all. Was this what it felt like at the other end of courtroom scrutiny?

“Okay, fine. I don’t,” he admitted. “But you’re a kid! A growing kid! I’ll do the cooking, alright?”

“The guest shouldn’t be doing the cooking.”

“I’m not guest, Trucy! I’m supposed to take care of you!”

“Look, Dad’s coming back for lunch. I can’t leave him hungry,” she said.

Apollo drooped with a sigh. “I’m sure what he means is that he’s coming back to settle lunch for you. Look, I could even ask him right now!

“I highly doubt he can cook,” Trucy stated, pouting.

“Mr Wright’s an adult. I’m sure he can settle his own meals. But if you really think that, I can just do the cooking. Your germs are going to get in the food anyway.”

“I can wear a mask,” Trucy rebutted.

Apollo waved his arms wildly before dropping them in exhaustion. “Rest. Please? Trucy?”

Trucy frowned at her feet. “It’s just a meal. I can do a meal.”

“Exactly! So can your dad. It’s just a meal. He can handle that by himself,” he said.

“I’m cooking,” Trucy insisted, stomping her foot.

“Why are you so stubborn about this?” Apollo sighed. Then, he noticed her fists shaking with emotion. “Trucy…” He watched her closely. “Is this really just about cooking?”

Her sharp blue eyes shot up to glare at Apollo. “Polly! You’re perceiving me?!”

Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Apollo muttered, “Sorry. Habit. But answer me truthfully, Trucy.” He looked at her again, his brown orbs warm and gentle now. “This isn’t just about cooking lunch, is this?”

“I’m supposed to be the one who cooks lunch every day,” Trucy replied.

“So you see it as a- um… a duty?”

A silent nod.

“So skipping out makes you feel bad?” Apollo asked as he pulled a chair out and sat on it. “Like you’re not doing your part?”

Another nod. This time, she tentatively added, “It’s like a contract.”

He hummed in understanding. Then, he dragged another chair out and patted the seat.

Gingerly, Trucy sat down beside him. Her hands gripped the sides of the chair, tense.

“I kind of get it,” Apollo began. “I mean, being a foster kid, most of my relationships with my guardians feel like contracts too. ‘If you don’t do this and that, you won’t get, um, whatever.’ So I kind of get it. That kind of spread to my other relationships to be honest. So I always get this guilt when I’m not — I don’t know — performing?”

Trucy huffed in amusement.

“Have I ever told you about my best friend?”

“Clay?”

“Yeah, him. I used to always set rules for myself on what I should do for and with Clay,” Apollo continued. “I’d, um, not go for things, like parties or school projects, if he wasn’t going with me because I felt bad enjoying myself without him and stuff like that. When he found out, he got so mad at me and said it was dumb.”

Trucy snickered. “That is dumb.”

“Yeah, because, you know, he really hated that I wasn’t doing things for myself because I had set my own rules for our friendship. Well, the point I’m making is this,” Apollo said. “People who care about you wouldn’t want your relationship with them to restrict or hurt you, you know? People who really care would want the best for you, I think.” He looked up at Trucy. “And I think your father cares about you. A lot.”

Trucy was silent. She wasn’t meeting his eyes.

“I-I hope the things I said made sense,” Apollo stuttered. “I was just saying what I thought. I’m really not that good with words- URNGH!”

Trucy had slammed her face into his chest. Stiffly, Apollo’s arms hovered at his shoulder level as the teenager tightened her embrace. A fond smile spread across his face. Slowly, he lowered his arms over her shoulders and pat between her shoulder blades.

“Thanks, Polly,” Trucy said as she pulled back. She shot him a cheeky grin. “You make a pretty decent older brother.”

Apollo rolled his eyes. “Quit teasing me. Now, go sleep. I have a meal to make.”

[jrbalufbfnzl]

I slept late yesterday n woke up at 9h30 bc my mom ws spamming my phone. I have to text wishes for my fam bc their granddad died and go to the pharmacy. Slept from 1 till almost 10 and didnt feel tired when i woke up. Ill try n b productive today im gna take my pills n walk the dogs. I also have to finish mty sisters drawing n listen to all her memos

I need to cut my hair i cannot stand the sensation

Thinking about having more tats n being anxious bout it for some reason

Ill try to be strong n turn away from food and hopefully as well ill be able to exercise but no food at ALL today sounds grear to me but no pills and no sleeping all day bc it ruins the mood

Didnt wake n bake but didnt meditate, im lazy to meditate thismorn. Been hanging on my phone for a lil more than an hour so ill just go out n do my stuff now

My dogs off her medication today i hope shell getbetter i cannot deal w the stress of her having a chronical serous disease.

I scratched my ears until they bled n couldnt hezr well yesterday

UPDATE : i managed to walk yhe first dog and fed both of em. Im waiting for my pills to kick to walk the second one. It was a struggle to get something non triggering to eat and im trying to wait as much as possible to eat. Days are fucking short anyways and ill xhabge my password and lockdown uvereats to not order some tonight maybe. Ill try and sleep early and stay strong and also get ready to see peeps and maybe feel a lil bit better but also i wanna stay alone. I cried a bit bc im ashamed to be so paralysed at 25 time is running fast and hezlth as well and the fall could be terrible idk. I felt anxious to walk both of the dogs at the same time or evenbto vring them to the parc or go to the pharmacy even tho its 5mins away n its kind of a nice walk. My stomach and intestine hurts tho. I hope ill manage to go to the pharmacy n exercise today n shave my hair n meditate and finish my sisters drzwing. Its not that much

UPDATE 2 : its 30 to 7 and i managed to cut my hair and walk the two dogs once. I feel zncious about walking them a second time but ill make it feed them then take them out.

My best friend made a post sayin that knowing otger people dezl w the same stuff as her is rezsuring so i ferl less guilty of "making it about me all the time" bc thats rly not what im trying to do and my bf told me i wzs incapable of listening so i guesd it fucked up my self apreciation.

Sometimes i feel like my bf is the only thing in his world and i also feel like its giod for him but at the same time i feel like im wrong znd im the one taking toi mych space. I have 0 sense of whats real and whats not and as soin as im thinkin ab smth that is not invalidating to me i kind of gaslight myself into thinking otherwise znd remarks my bf made repeatedly in the past arent helping. I have to finish my sistets drzwing walk the dogs n exercise. Today i felt anxious multiple times and wasnt really able to get out of bed. I didnt meditate first thing in the morning either whoch i shouldve. Im gonna try my psycholoist tomorrow to take another apt bc i missed the last one. I feel like a failure. Good thing is im not hubgry at all bc of aderall and stress so thats cool. Ill try ti go to the pharact tomorrow as well but even thibking about livin another dy and having stuff t do makes me rly anxious i feel incapable of having a routine.

Update 3 : did the drawing, hate it and i dont have my mind up to that. Esp sibce the dezdline is so close and i feel like my sisters work ethic is so abusive and self centered that i just dont have fuel to turn her idea into smth cooler and add detzils or a personal touch. I just dobt want to experiment w it and i hate doing it and it shows. I walked my first dog for the second time fed them both gave the last pill to my second dog abd im about to walk her out now. I feel shitty about my day.

Today my ideal me :

Wouldve woke up meditate exercise and took care of the dogs in a whistle withiut thinking to avoid building up unecessary anxiety and have the drawing done by thr end of the morning and went to the dog park and pharlacy afterwards anf make music.

If someone saw me from an outside perspective :

I think they would think that my depression is quite invalidating and that im just letting myself down completely

Today i did :

Nothing consistent but i feel like i did my best within my possivilities and i went above my lack of motivation to draw and rakr care of the dogs

I felt :

Down empty and dead anxious and tired.

I ate :

Two biscuits and a bubble tea

Tomorrow i'll :

Try to meditate and exercise and feed the dogs and get ready for what its worth and go out a little abd go to the pharmacy abd call my shrink and try to get sum weed even tho i shouldnt but the anciety is too much

Im grateful for :

Having the strenght to write stuff down znd maybe itll be the start of a routine

My shrink being so lame she accepted that i get surgery

The dogs remiding me that i rly shouldnt br like my parents and helping me reflec and remember on abuse and stuff