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#so it's day 18 Lena
innamorament0 · 11 months
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Happy Birthday to our favourite scientist and Kara's wife <3
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rustingcat · 2 years
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Supercorptober day 18 -
Secret
When you and your best friend build a machine to help your friends make a biological baby and your hypothetical genetic test you made with her and yours DNA ends up taking up instead.
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wandamaximoffsbadgirl · 6 months
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prompt 8 and 14 (shy readers first time) and moms bsf wanda
You Were Red and You Liked Me Because I Was Blue
Mom's bsf!Wanda Maximoff x shy!innocent!Romanoff!fem!reader
Word Count: 1.8k
Warnings: 18+, MDNI, age gap relationship (W=35, R=20) W calls herself Mommy, use of pet names, W fingers R
A/N: I worked on this all day while I didn't feel good and I have a killer headache at the moment so if I missed any warning I'm sorry. I can't think anymore.
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The air was cold, without snow falling to distract you it felt unbearable to be waiting for your ride back home for break. Unfortunately you mom was off on a work trip until 3 days before Christmas so instead her best friend, Wanda would be picking you up.
Normally Wanda would have also been preoccupied this time of year, but since her and Vision finalized their divorce and custody of the boys, Vision would be getting them Christmas break first.
You couldn't imagine what that must be like for Wanda. Suddenly after 10 years of family tradition she was alone again and Wanda being alone was never a good thing. You'd known Wanda for a long time. After Natasha helped take down the red room she'd taken you, the youngest widow on the ship under her wing. The day you gained Natasha as a mom, you also gained an aunt Yelena. You had always heard stories of the famous Black Widow that got away and you'd seen Yelena training with others the greatest child assassin the world has ever known. Though you know her now as Auntie Lena who eats Mac and cheese straight out of the pot.
You're pulled out of your thoughts when you see the familiar red subaru ascent. Wanda pulled up with a smile as you opened up the trunk to set your luggage in before quickly getting in the passenger seat with a shiver. Wanda pulled you into her arms, your body instantly heating from her contact.
“Hi sweetheart. How was the flight in?” She asked near your ear, making your heart skip a beat as you pulled back, trying to calm your body down.
“It was fine. Better than having you drive five hours to come grab me.” You told her as you put on your seat belt.
“I wouldn't have minded a 5 hour road trip with you sweet girl.” You bit the inside of your cheek at her words, choosing to stare out the window as she pulled away from the airport.
With Wanda's help you brought your luggage into the house and headed to your room to finally lie down and stretch out. The flight was only an hour and a half and the car ride back was about a half hour. You had barley acknowledged Wanda when she said about her starting on dinner instead choosing to go shower and clean yourself up.
You'd been told that even though you're an adult your mom wanted Wanda there with you. She said it was so you could keep an eye on the other. For Wanda it was so you'd stay out of trouble and for you it was to keep Wanda company. Natasha knew what it was like for Wanda to be alone.
What you and Natasha didn't know though was Wanda had fawned over you since she met you. When Natasha first introduced you and Yelena you always hid away. A little mouse making little to no noise as you moved. Even your thoughts were quiet to Wanda. It was something she found solace in around you. She knew what had happened to you and the other widows. Though you were next step of perfecting what Drekovy wanted out of the widows, total control they had perfected and for you, the only survivor of your age group, an enhanced super soldier serum. It gave you all the same enhancements as Steve and Bucky, but you stayed small, unassuming so no one ever saw you coming.
“Y/N! Dinner's ready sweet girl!” Wanda called up as you looked over yourself in the mirror, the scars lining your arms, shoulders, chest. They were everywhere.
You took the stairs two at a time, hair still damp, but Wanda's cooking smelt too good to keep her waiting. She looked up from moving things from the counter to the dining table. Natasha always used to have these ‘family meals’ where her parents, Yelena, Wanda, Vision, and the boys would come over. They stopped happening when Wanda and Vision decided to get the divorce. A smile was on Wanda's face,
“I made your favorite. Help me move it over to the table.” You happily helped out so the two of you could eat dinner together.
As Wanda was cleaning up and insisting that you go relax on the couch and get a movie ready you watched her from the couch, forgoing a movie and putting on The Office instead. You needed the background noise because to you your thoughts felt so loud that Wanda must be able to hear you if you didn't have something distracting her.
As she finished up and sat next to you she gave no indication of hearing your thoughts which she often did to those around her. Her arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you against her as if you were two magnets. You bit the corner of your lips trying to watch the show.
You knew Wanda was experienced obviously, she has twins. You on the other hand haven't even gotten the opportunity to kiss a girl or a boy or anyone because from the day you met Wanda all you ever wanted was her. You'd never tell her that though.
She was with Vision when you met her nearly 13 years ago. With everything that happened after that with Thanos and then defeating him without the loss of half the population you could just live life normally for the first time.
Wanda's hand found your thigh, rubbing gently as she watched the show, one the two of you have watched multiple times over the years. You enjoyed sitcoms like she did along with being introduced to reality TV which is just a guilty pleasure really.
“W-Wands…” your voice was barely a whisper and Wanda pretended not to hear you. Not even when you started squirming under her touch as her hand grew closer to your hot center. Her hand squeezed you as you let out a little whimper. “Wands…” you tried again, trying to be louder, but you couldn't. Once again your plea goes unacknowledged as her pinky brushes against your clit, your hands fly down to her wrist. She finally looks at you. You don't dare look at her.
“What's wrong sweet girl?” She asks so innocently as if she has no idea what she's doing.
“W-Wands…I…you…” you fumble with your words. Her other hand reaches your chin, forcing you to look at her.
“What about us sweet girl?” You open your mouth, but nothing comes out. She pulls you onto her lap, her hands resting on your hips. “Just watch the show sweet girl. Let Mommy play.” You felt like fireworks went off in your stomach. Sure you'd heard the boys call Wanda Mommy and yeah you'd heard her call herself Mommy over the years, but never in the tone she just used and never directed at you.
You felt like everything on you was burning except for Wanda's hands that were always cold and clad in rings. You did as told keeping your eyes on the screen until you felt her hand push past your waistband. Your hands once again grabbing her wrist, not because you didn't want her to, you really wanted her too. You were nervous.
“W-Wands…I've never…” Wanda moved forward, tilting her head to look at you.
“Not ever at college?” She questioned. You shook your head.
“N-not even a kiss…” you admitted. Wanda's hand leaving your shorts and moving to your face.
“These precious lips haven't kissed anyone else?” You shook your head, “So I'll be your first?” She asked pulling you closer. All you could manage as your heart pounded was a soft ‘mhmm’ before her lips touched yours.
As her lips meet yours, it's a gentle yet electrifying sensation, sending waves of warmth cascading through you. Wanda's touch is tender, guiding you through this unfamiliar territory with ease and patience. With each fleeting moment, you feel yourself melting into her embrace, the world around you fading into the background.
When Wanda pulls back, there's a brief moment of hesitation, as if time itself is holding its breath. You find yourself lost in her gaze, a mixture of emotions swirling within you – anticipation, vulnerability, and a newfound courage. Slowly, a soft smile tugs at the corners of Wanda's lips, her eyes sparkling with tenderness.
With a gentle brush of her fingers against your cheek, Wanda whispers words of reassurance, her voice a soothing melody in the stillness of the room. And as you lean into her touch, a sense of peace settles within you.
The night carried on without Wanda trying to slip past your shorts instead she kept stealing kisses late into the night before deciding it was time for bed. It was when you moved you could feel just how wet you'd before and you freeze, your thighs smacking tightly together. Wanda stopped, a tug on your hand.
“What's wrong sweet girl?” She looked back at you, confusion etched on her face.
“It…its..icky…” you squirmed and Wanda smirked, taking two steps towards you.
“Don't worry my sweet girl,” she tilted your head up, “Mommy is going to take good care of you.” Her breath against your lip, her voice sweet and thick with her accent, the one you heard all those years ago. Your legs want to turn to jelly.
Wanda wasn't expecting you to stay quiet once her fingers slipped past your wet folds, but you did. Little breathy moans, small whimpers, tiny pleas fell past your lips as your face burned and your eyes screwed shut.
“Don't close your eyes Detka. Look at me.” You could only obey with her voice sounding the way it did. You looked at her, she smiled at you and only picked up her pace.
You squirmed and felt like you were going to burst as you whimpered and tried to get away, but she held you there. You tried closing your legs, but she held them open.
“Open your legs Detka. I wanna see you.” Her nails dug into your thigh.
“F-feels weird…” you squeaked out.
“You're gonna cum for Mommy it'll make you feel better. Go on. Let it happen.” As if your body was waiting on her word, that coil inside of you snapped. Your back arched as your eyes rolled back. “That's a good girl…Mommy’s good girl.” Her fingers slowed down before leaving you. Your eyes closed but soon enough Wanda was helping you sit up.
“Water sweet girl. Take a few sips.” You did as told, knowing Wanda always knew best. When she felt you had enough she tapped your cheek and you let go.
She helped you clean yourself up, the cool towel feeling nice against your hot skin and then into pajamas which only consisted of an old band t-shirt of Wanda's and a pair of your panties. As she got the two of you settled into your bed, holding you against her chest. Her fingers moved through your hair as your eyes began to flutter she spoke,
“We're going to have a lot of fun until your mom comes home.” You smiled against her skin. You almost hoped she wouldn't be home for Christmas if it meant more time playing like this with Wanda.
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sleepynoons · 22 days
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Underneath the Surface
As an attendant for the first Harbinger, Il Capitano, you work to maintain his household in Snezhnaya, though you can still only admire him from afar. But that distant reverence changes completely when you are offered another role that goes beyond your day-to-day and allows you to share a bond with him that no one else knows the true nature of. This is a dream come true, of course, but what happens when the dream ends? When will it end? And what will you do after it ends?
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ooc!capitano x afab!f!reader, nsfw, 18+
word count: ~4,600
cw: power imbalance + unhealthy relationship dynamics, dom/sub dynamics, sadism/masochism, pain kink, knife kink, praise kink, predator/prey, ownership + master, use of other sharp objects (claws), temperature play, graphic descriptions of blood/injuries/bruises/pain/etc., sensory deprivation (blindfold), mentions of death + murder
notes: ok i know everyone is head over heels for capitano because big looming man + the mask and cape stay on during sex ikik i get it, but what if our captain had... a dark, serious, + slightly twisted personality? bc i imagine, in canon, for someone so committed to his work and the tsaritsa, his sense of justice and overpowering physical strength could prevent him from making rash decisions like being in a relationship with another... anyway, my take on capitano! tysssssm to @staraxiaa for beta-reading and letting me yap away in our discord <33 lena, could not have churned this out any earlier if it were not for your enthusiasm and hypnosis. ily queen. anyway, hope y'all enjoy!
THE HALLS are still, silent aside from the occasional clanking of metal weaponry. All of the soldiers and attendants are holding their breaths, anticipating for what is to come. You, too, wait, immobile, on the edge of your chair in front of the vanity. You avoid your reflection in the mirror, but appearances are of utmost importance, so you busy yourself by repeatedly smoothing the pleats of your silk nightgown. 
It has been two long months since you have fallen back into this routine: waking before sunrise, dressing with your finest gowns and lingerie, and awaiting his instruction throughout the day. Of course, you still behave in an appropriate manner befitting of his grace when he is not around, but there is no need to impress. Not many are aware of the nature of your agreement with him, anyway.  
A soldier’s call can be heard from outside your window, a signal of his grace’s arrival from the accompanying blare of a horn. You suck in a sharp breath, pursing your lips as you hold, before exhaling completely. You have half an hour.
Making your way around his chamber, you go about your final checks. He has always been particular with the way things should be, his sense of justice and discipline underlying and interweaving with every aspect of his own life. You blow away specks of dust from his bookshelves, tie the chiffon of the bed canopy curtains to their posts, and return your makeup on the vanity back to a pouch, not before dabbing on a bit more powder and curling your eyelashes once more.
The half hour passes quickly, and you rush to stand by the door as you hear the heavy thuds of his boots approach. You bow your head and curtsy as he steps in. It is important that you do not look at him until he permits. He does not greet you, simply strides over to the bathroom and shuts the door behind him, heading to his closet farther beyond.
You sigh with relief. He did not take you immediately.
The next step of the routine is to wait for him to change. Beyond the door, you hear the faint rustle of heavy fabric hitting the floor, silver and bronze embossings clicking against sharp nails, and the occasional low grunt. You would assist him if you could, but no one has seen him without his fur coat and mask. You consider yourself lucky to have seen him without his cloak, but you, too, have never witnessed his visage. It is strange, though. As per your contract, you are supposed to help him with such tasks. Shrugging, you figure there is no need to hypothesize. You would never dare to act like you understand his grace and how he thinks and acts.
If he still does not speak to you when he returns, the burden falls on you to initiate.
You watch as the door handle twists before the door swings open. Instinctively, you lower your gaze and nod your head once in greeting. Pausing a beat, you give him a chance to speak if he wants. But he does not.
“Your grace,” you say.
He walks over to you, standing in front of where you sit on the edge of his bed. A gloved hand rests on the crown of your head – firm, cold. It traces the shape of your skull, sliding down to your ear, sharp metal claws scraping against the cartilage and the tender skin of your neck. He continues along the path of your jawline before holding your chin between his index finger and thumb. You are still looking downwards, only able to see up to his clothed forearm. Holding you steady, he appraises you and the effort you put into yourself. You try to relax under his gaze, not as an act of defiance or resistance but rather as a demonstration of your trust and loyalty in him. His grace knows best, after all. His criticism is guidance, only out of best interest for you, his praise gospel, miraculous stories to pass down for generations.
He hums. It is a deep, satisfied rumble.
“Well done,” he praises, releasing his hold. “I am relieved to be back.”
It is not often that his grace is content. He is rarely appeased with his own efforts. Naturally, you feel a sense of giddiness, a shiver of delight threatening to shake up your still frame. You even notice an urge of want for him, hoping that he would pay just a little more attention to the way you did your hair or the new perfume you are wearing or how the color of the night gown compliments the curves and rolls of your body. A stroke of luck, you think, to keep your dangerous emotions at bay. You must reflect on tonight and emulate what went well going forward.
Before you can relay your gratitude to your captain, he continues to speak. “I would like to try something different tonight.”
He pulls a wide silk scarf out from his pocket and wraps the navy fabric around your head, thereby obscuring your vision. The lack of light in the room, along with the dark shade of the blindfold, make it impossible for you to see anything beyond the faint silhouette of your hands as you stretch them out in front of you to test the opacity of the silk. But this is nothing out of the ordinary.
You startle as he splays his palm on your back and slides an arm underneath your legs. He picks you up, as if you are but a mere feather, and repositions you so that you are lying down on the bed.
“It will hurt. Will you be able to take it?” he asks. Void of his usual assertiveness, he is shedding his role of a Harbinger, melting into a simple person who wants his desires fulfilled. He is speaking to you with caution and respect, fulfilling his end of his contract, as your master, your owner, to ensure that tonight’s experience will be pleasurable for you as well. However, you know the power and strength he holds beyond the walls of his bedroom will never fully escape your conscience. It is your obligation to protect yourself from dire harm, but you cannot deny him the opportunity to experiment, in fear of retaliation and punishment.
You reply, “How painful?”
The bed dips beside your hip, and you feel the leather of his glove rub into your thigh.
“I will use my gloves and a knife.”
Scared or excited, you cannot tell. At his words, you become acutely sensitive towards the feel of his gloved hand as he continues to glide it up and down your leg. You can almost taste the steely, icy sting of his claws digging into the fat of your thigh, breaking the skin just enough for beaded crimson to trickle, not enough to scar permanently.
“Your grace, is this a punishment?”
“Not at all.” His hand travels farther up and pushes the lace trim of your nightgown aside to reveal your underwear underneath. He pulls at the ribbons at the side, slowly untying the thong, as he chuckles, “It is a reward, for your effort and time.”
The praise is doing wonders to you. You feel dizzy, light, and hot in the head, and the pulsing in your core intensifies, your hole fluttering and throbbing in tandem with the escalating rate of your heartbeat. Even though you cannot see, you can almost sense him smiling, perhaps at the wetness that is spotting your underwear or possibly even the state of your whole being, showing his understanding of and command over your body.
The latter seems likely as he presses his claws into your skin, as if to counter and neutralize your raging internal inferno. The cold shocks the nerves at the juncture where your hip connects to your leg, where the ribbon of your panties used to be tied at.
“I will start easy,” he explains. To demonstrate, he curls his fingers and pushes, channeling all of the pressure into the tips of his claws and persists until they shallowly latch into your skin. You squirm, jump, and whimper at the pain. It hurts more than you had expected, though you really had no point of comparison in the first place. You continue to shudder as he holds his fingers in place, probably gauging your reaction.
“Th-that is alright,” you manage to stammer. The pinch may be harsh, but it does not draw blood or bring tears to your eyes, simply a scraping of the surface of your skin. You can withstand a little more, you reassure yourself. This is your reward. Without a word, he moves his hands back down to your thighs and scratches your right.
The motion is fast, clean. In fact, your body and mind do not react to the two long, slanted cuts he leaves, the blood only spilling milliseconds after the damage has been done. The pain comes even later. At first, you feel nothing, and even the thin streams of blood flowing out of the wounds only leave a wet sensation on your otherwise untainted legs. But then, the stinging comes, akin to that of an unexpected paper cut. Except, with each passing second, it gets worse, as if the paper cut is being pulled along and extended, and your leg strains against his hold to move, to distract itself from the harm inflicted. Crimson is sure to be leaking from the full length of the cuts, and at the back of your throat, you can almost taste the coppery scent of oxidizing iron.
When he moves to repeat the same onto your other leg, you bite the inside of your cheek to prepare for the incoming pain. Part of your role is to adapt quickly, and in this case, you have to sense and react to his grace’s next steps immediately. The chiseled points of his nails cut through your skin like a large kitchen knife slicing through even the toughest of ingredients – precise, swift, ignorant of any and all resistance.
You have never gone this long with just pain, let alone be deprived of one of your senses. Nights with his grace are inevitably bound to be painful, but in his own way, he softens the blows and plows of his roughness and aggression by pleasuring your body.
Your first morning after, you woke up unable to feel anything past your waist. Throughout the night, to show you just exactly what you were getting yourself into, he forced you to reach peak after peak after peak as a test of your endurance, stamina, loyalty. Though, you were more shocked to see the purpling bruises encircling your ankles and wrists, as if his grace had used cuffs on you. But he had not. Those bruises were entirely inflicted by his tight hold on you, shackling you down as you thrashed and kicked and instinctively attempted to escape, serving the same purpose in chaining your life and mercy to his will.
One’s ideals – justice – will always come at the cost of another’s freedom – autonomy.
But you are not opposed to such limitations. Out of all of the Harbingers, you are endlessly grateful that it is his grace who is your leader. Even though he may not be your direct master beyond the clauses of your contract, he is dutiful and considerate towards those who swear an oath to his name. You come from a family of Fatui soldiers, some of the best and the brightest, many trained under the watchful supervision of his grace, so from birth, you have been taught to idolize him. But to have your idol recognize you? Speak to you? Bed you? Unheard of, and to this day, you are not sure why he chooses you, time and time again. You cannot even fathom how he knows of you – a simple, one-of-several attendants who maintain his mansion of a home under the instruction of the head butler.
The nature of your contract with him is simple. (His grace often comments how he much prefers the dealings of the Liyuen people, how quick they are to draw up agreements and negotiations, compared to the conniving nature of some of his colleagues.) Whenever he returns, you shall take care of his personal desires and wants, as he will with yours. You are to fully commit yourself to him, trust in his intuition to know how to treat you accordingly, and he expects you to reciprocate, to satisfy him to the best of your abilities.
Your role is not as physically taxing as it is mentally laborious. His grace is rarely home – you recently heard he has a surge of dealings in Natlan that require his attention –, so your body is not under constant stress. However, when you are with him, you behave as if every night together is a performance review, a test of your memory, if you remember how to overcome your instincts to hold your body still enough in place, if you remember the way he gravitates towards elegant silk dresses and kimonos, if you remember that he will never apologize but will wrap gauze around your wounds when you are asleep.
You know you are expendable. As soon as you fail to satisfy him, he could – will – discard and replace you. While he has never outright pressured you, you know his grace is assessing you as well. But you cannot help but wonder – hope – that there is something about you – something so intrinsic and bespoke about you – that explains why, even in your failings, he will not let you go. You are sure there are faults that lie in you that you cannot see, that he will see. Yet, because you have not been let go, you wonder if he is alright with slight imperfections because it is no one other than you.
Regardless, you must not be too full of yourself. That is a cardinal sin with respect to his grace’s values. The strong become the weak as soon as they overestimate themselves, he would often preach.
You are brought back by a building pressure at your ankles. You raise your head to look down, to no avail. But you can feel his gloves, now slightly warm from being in contact with your body, wrapping themselves around your protruding bones, tighter and tighter, the chains locking with finality. There is a buzz in your toes from the constriction of circulation, and you bite on your lower lip to prevent yourself from whining at the bruising grip he has on you. You count beats in your head, seconds not true to time, muddled by the exhilarated racing of your heart, foolishly trying to distract yourself by examining his grace’s behavior instead. How long will he hold for? How long does it take to leave stubborn bruises that will remain for at least three days? Is it supposed to hurt this much?
But all of those questions and concerns do not matter anymore as soon as he speaks. “I was right in choosing you.”
As if his affirmation was not enough, he releases your legs and moves up the bed to embrace you. Winding his arms around you, he lifts you a margin off the bed so that your chests touch, your silk against his thick black wool. One of his hands then comes up to cradle the back of your head, gently brushing and patting you, almost like he is lulling you to sleep. You melt, and you have never felt such a strong urge to wrap him in your own arms.
Perhaps you can be a bit greedy tonight? Throwing caution to the wind, you mumble, “Y-your grace, may I…?”
His approving hum makes your heart trill with joy. To avoid any mishaps, you place your hands on his arms, following their sturdy build until you reach his shoulders. From here, your fingertips can brush against his flowing black hair. It is coarse and thick, and you muster all of your willpower to resist the urge to run your hands through the locks.
As if reading your mind, he says, “You can touch my hair, if you so wish.”
“That was not my intention,” you reply, fighting the smile threatening to bloom on your face. 
He insists by leaning closer to you, so that you are forced to feel the front, shorter strands of his hair poke at your exposed clavicles. You can even argue that you can feel his breath from here, but then again, does his grace breathe? Is he man or monster? (Benefactor or foe?)
“I shall resume.” And he proceeds to grab you at the waist, gripping you as tightly as he did to your ankles, and you feel the same pressure building within you. But you can hold on longer, after all. This is a reward.
He pushes the silk dress all the way up to your neck and exposes your upper body. As your body tenses in response to the cold, he pokes at the goosebumps appearing on your skin, as well as uses the tip of a nail to trace your areolae, centimeters away from your perked nipples. He circles them for two eight-counts, slow and drawling, before suddenly pinching and tugging at them. You yelp – an unintended mistake – and arch your back. He is still clothed, and the metal buttons and chains of his blazer dig into your skin for the briefest of moments, eliciting another wave of shudders from you.
And the worst of the pain comes. He gives one last pinch to your nipples before moving his hands to your sides where your rib cage lies right underneath. He rubs his thumbs over the bump of each bone, gliding his fingers back and forth, perpendicular to the way your bones curve inwards to protect your insides. You do not know this, but he is searching, identifying where he will lay his wreckage next, between which ribs to leave his trace. Then, he curls his claws into you, a bone or two below your breasts, and sinks them into you, slowly wounding you parallel to the slanted direction of your cage.
It is unbearable. There is no way to prevent yourself from screaming and sobbing. Tears drench the blindfold within seconds, and you can only distract yourself by tightening your embrace around his neck and digging your own nails into your forearms to somehow transfer the pain elsewhere, overwhelm your brain so that it cannot perceive the full extent of the damage being done to your chest. Otherwise, you can only hope that his grace is understanding and allows you to wail at the gashes he is leaving.
And what about appearances? Surely, your body will be marred from tonight and may not ever fully erase the signs of tonight’s activities.
You freeze. Your blood chills. Physical pain dims and recedes to the back of your mind.
Appearances… do matter. If you dared to come up with any reason as to why his grace has chosen you, it would only be sensible to conclude that it is because of the way you look, no? Prior to your first night together, you had never interacted with him before – he did not even present the contract for this partnership to you – the head butler did! Therefore, there is no possibility that his grace knows you well, aside from direct reports from the head butler and, perhaps, passing comments from your family. And he would definitely not choose you for your talents, as you have none.
In fact, the only reason you are in the castle is quite simple. Though you are not disowned by your family, you are not treated as one of them. You were sickly throughout childhood, meaning you could not start training early enough. Even if you had enrolled later on, you would have never been sufficient enough in your capabilities to reach the high official ranks that your family has held onto for decades. Lacking the combat prowess your other siblings, parents, and ancestors have, you will never be able to fulfill your lineage’s mission to the Tsaritsa. Therefore, you had to find other ways to serve the Fatui, and your search led you to his grace’s household.
There is nothing to your person besides a family crest that does not want to claim you and a corporeal weak to the natural winds and storms of Snezhnaya. And, truly, the only thing you have all to yourself is this body of yours, something you can willingly choose to offer as long as it cooperates with you.
Is this it? After he scars and carves and rips you open, not even this anatomy of yours will be yours ever again. Is he to leave his mark on you forever, only to end this arrangement soon after?
Your wails are no longer because of your flesh being torn apart by cold, ruthless hands, hands that know the feel and taste and rotting warmth of blood. Instead, these wails are ones afraid of a future without these hands, these nails that are now also stained with your blood and skin and tears. When he cleans these gloves later, you can only hope the alcohol does not eradicate all of your traces.
He does not stop until the gashes reach the ends of your rib cage. 
Taking deep breaths from your mouth, you gasp for air as he pulls away and sits back on his heels to examine your state – spent, covered in spit and blood and cold sweat, many things but your usual demureness.
You are incapable of keeping up such a ruse. You are too exhausted and tortured to even feign obedience. Though, if his grace asked, you would try for him, despite knowing you would barely be able to put on a show. Because for him, you would, without a beat of doubt or hesitation, take on any role if he asked you of it, as long as you can share a private bond with him, one that no else knows the intimate details of. 
You hear shuffling, a pocket being pulled open – good, blood stains thread quite stubbornly –, and a quick flick of something clicking into place.
“This will be the last thing I do to you tonight. Raise your arm.”
You do as he says, barely feeling your forearms and beyond. He catches your hand and turns it over so that your palm is facing the ceiling.
The smooth, cool surface is recognizable, even to someone who has not fought in years. He places the flat side of the blade against your skin, letting it soak and adjust to your broiling heat. Once it is warm enough, he makes quick work, making short cuts in various directions around your wrist, over the spot where you take your pulse. As he works, he turns your wrist around as needed. The cuts always sting a bit at first before the sensation of the next being made takes over. You miserably think how you will never be able to marry with the way his grace is etching himself into you.
It does not take long, given how skilled he is.
But the routine has been disrupted, and when he sets your arm down, you are not sure what to do next. Usually, you would be unconscious by now. But you are wide awake, body thrumming and pulsing, sending signals to all the places where your nerves are exposed.
Again, you think back to the same question. Is this supposed to be my reward?
“You will now rest.” His grace’s voice commands, leaving no space for argument.
So you ask, instead of objecting. “And my body?”
“We will leave it as is. I need them to mark.” He enunciates with finality. You are unable to probe further, unable to even get a glimpse of what he means beyond his statements.
You manage to croak, “My apologies, your grace, for failing to restrain myself this evening.”
He only places his hand on the crown of your head, soft smooths and pats, like at the very beginning of tonight, before everything that has since occurred. 
Perhaps, what you long for, whether that be his touch or his coldness or his grace himself, is salvation. Someone who can bestow you with a responsibility so you can make yourself useful, find value in your being beyond a last name and damaged flesh. Despite tonight, you still want his grace to be with you, even if that means he devours you whole by the morning. Because you are already indebted to him for your employment. And you now owe him more than ever for permitting you to invade the confines of his space, to be surrounded by everything that is his, to feel him. To be something special is what you deeply, most greedily covet, and you are fearful that, in the near future, you will not be the only person who can say they have seen the captain without his coat on. Because without his grace, what will you become? Who are you? What are you?
Rather than relieve your body of strain through arousal and pleasure, tonight, he provides tepid comfort through the slow tempo of his hand against your head, an intangible poultice against your physical wounds. Inside, you realize that, all along, the reward has been his grace’s direct kindness and generosity towards you. And you tell yourself to enjoy these last remnants of his undivided attention, and fall asleep. 
In the morning, you do as planned. Wake early. Bathe in scorching hot water even though it could rot your untended wounds. Dress in a burgundy long-sleeved gown. Prepare your hair and makeup. Pray that this dawn is not the last sunrise you will share with him.
Before you leave the bedroom to greet his grace, who is no doubt already working in his office, you sigh, filled with a deep sense of shame, disappointment, and mourning, though these words are futile in fully grasping all that festers within you.
But the walls of this bedroom know something you do not. And they think you ought to know, as they watch you leave with palpable dejection.
They have seen their owner evolve and age over time. Yet, they have only seen him exhilarated barely a few times – and rarely excited and riled up by the same thing more than twice.
The walls see, hear, smell everything about their owner.
Last night, amidst your cries, his grace was huffing with exertion, pouring effort and energy into your body. His eyes widened, pupils dilated, at the way your body struggled under his hold, yet you only held him closer. Mouth gaped in awe at how you screeched from the pain yet did not fight back even as an animalistic instinct to survive. He was practically leaking bloodlust, or more specifically, a strong urge to claim, overwhelm, overpower you. And he did so, purposely not leaving you bandages on the night table as always so that the wounds would stay intact. These cuts and gashes and tears shall never disappear from your body, and you will never forget the pain he has inflicted upon you. He has engraved himself into you because, while his righteousness and loyalty to the Tsaritsa come first, he will still return to you when he can. And he does not want you to forget that, even if this reminder comes in the form of garish wounds and the delicate traces of a bracelet in your skin.
The walls know why his grace chooses you. What you really should know is how much of an abnormality you really are. And his grace adores that about you.
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barcaatthemoon · 3 months
Text
mine, all mine || lena oberdorf x reader ||
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lena gets jealous when a former teammate of yours flirts with you.
minors dni, 18+, smut ahead.
"why can't we just stay in tonight?" lena asked you as she watched you move all around the bedroom. you usually liked to hit ibiza or greece for your vacation, but when your old team invited you to stay in london for a week, you had to go. lena was more than happy to join you, but that was before gio.
you had already warned lena that some of your teammates could be a bit touchy or flirty. she had come in with a degree of knowing that she wouldn't have all of your time this trip. there had been days of her staying in, and that was fine. however, that didn't stop her from getting jealous when gio's name popped up in all of your stories.
"we have tomorrow to do things," lena tried. she looked at you hopefully, only to completely deflate when you shook your head. "come on, i haven't you to myself for a single night yet."
"you get me all night every night in germany," you told her. "besides, gio is really excited about this place. we were supposed to go before i left, but we forgot."
"fine," lena grumbled as she walked out of the room. you frowned, but kept getting ready. you were on your way out the door when you saw lena standing in the hallway, seemingly waiting for you.
"i thought you wanted to stay in," you said. lena shook her head as she grabbed your hand.
"i just wanted to spend tonight with you." lena pressed a kiss to your cheek. it was sweet, suspiciously so in your eyes. you decided not to bring it up, and instead try to enjoy your night. an arsenal night out was something that you had been missing since you left for germany. your new teammates were cool, but it wasn't the same.
you gravitated towards the dance floor while lena got a couple of drinks for the two of you. lena leaned up against the bar as she watched you dance with alessia and lotte. the night was going much better than what lena had expected it to. you made sure to pull her onto the dance floor for a few songs that you knew lena liked.
"i'm sorry i was being such an ass earlier. i'm having fun," lena said as she wrapped her arm around your waist. the two of you were taking a break, one that you knew you'd need soon. gio was set to be coming in at any moment, and you couldn't wait to spend some time with your best friend. lena was none the wiser, having momentarily forgotten about gio.
"that's okay baby," you told her. things quieted down for a moment, but then they picked right back up when gio walked in. you were practically jumping up off of lena's lap to greet your friend.
lena huffed and crossed her arms over her chest as she watched you and gio. she stayed rooted to her spot in the booth where she could see everything. it wasn't like you completely abandoned her, but lena refused to go dance with you for the rest of the night. you were starting to get a bit upset, but gio and leah were right there to make you smile and laugh again.
"hi grumpy," you cooed as you dropped into lena's lap. lena ignored you completely, even as you cupped her cheeks and tried giginv her kisses. "come on, let's go back to the hotel."
"are you sure?" lena asked. she didn't want to disrupt your good time, even if her blood was boiling as she watched gio dance with you. you nodded as you got up and held your hand out to help her as well. both of you were pretty sober, but for different reasons. you were too busy dancing to really drink much, and lena knew that if she had even a single shot too much there would be an argument.
your ride back to the hotel was rough. lena was oddly quiet, but worst of all, she kept her hands to herself. you hoped maybe the true seclusion of the elevator would bring something out of her, but lena went as far as to brush you off when you tried to hug her. you were terrified that you had gone too far, and the apology was on the tip of your tongue for when you got back into your room.
lena didn't let things get that far. her hand rested on your jaw, holding onto it securely as she pinned you against the wall by the door. your heart was pounding in your chest so loud that you were certain that lena could hear it.
even if she could hear it, nothing was deterring lena from kissing you until you forgot about the entire world around you. all you could think about was the way that lena's lips pressed kiss after kiss against your own. she wasn't being overly rough, but you knew that she was usually much more gentle with you. there was something on your mind, and you had a pretty good feeling about what it was.
"what is all this about?" you asked her. lena didn't even paused as she placed her hands on your thighs and lifted you up into her arms. "lena, what are you doing?"
"all i've wanted all night was you. i thought we should have stayed in. i want to show you what we could have been doing all night," lena told you. she placed you down onto the bed. lena knew how good she looked, and if the smirk on her face had been annoying before she started to undress, it only got worse after. "we both knew that we'd end up here, didn't we?"
"what has gotten into you?" you asked her.
"nothing, but maybe your fingers if you can move when i'm done with you." you were no stranger to all of the ways that lena could fuck you. your first season with her at wolfsburg had been full of nights like this. lena liked to claim that she was perfectly secure in your relationship, but she was an overly jealous person sometimes. the first few weeks after your transfer had lena glaring at every single one of her teammates that looked at you in a way she deemed inappropriate.
lena would do a million things before she ever admitted that she was jealous of someone else. gio was no exception to that rule. since you and lena had been friends before you got together, she knew that you had almost ended up with your former arsenal teammate. it was gio who had pushed you towards lena, ultimately resulting in your loan-turned transfer to germany.
there was nobody else in the world that you could think of sleeping with other than lena. you could tell her this as many times as you wanted to, but you knew in the end, she'd still have her nights like this. you didn't need the reminder that you were lena's, but you welcomed it just like any other night you got to spend with her.
"keep this on," lena swatted your hands away from your own dress. "you look so good in this dress that i just have to fuck you in it tonight."
lena's words made your throat immediately dry up. there were no smiles or jokes like what you were used to. lena seemed deadly serious as she reached beneath the bottom of your dress to pull your underwear down. you didn't know why, but you felt nervous as she held your underwear in her hands. lena ran her thumb over the wet spot on the fabric before she tossed them behind her shoulder, seemingly disinterested.
"what's wrong? that's all for me, isn't it? you wouldn't get so wet for anybody else, would you?" lena asked. you quickly shook your head, and lena leaned forward with a predatory grin on her face. you were so close to giving her what she wanted, and then she'd give you everything that you could handle. "i want to hear you say it."
"it's all for you. i'm fucking soaked for you lena. you and only you," you told her. it was at those words that lena threw her composure away. lena spread your thighs as much as she could without having to take your dress off of your body.
"nobody can fuck you like me," lena told you. she leaned over your body to press harsh kisses to your lips as her fingers set an unrelenting pace in and out of you. the hotel room was quickly filled with the sounds of your moans as lena fucked you.
she didn't give you a moment of rest after you came on her fingers. lena had mentioned you not being able to move, so you knew that lena would keep going until you told her to stop. she would do as much as she could to you with the things that the two of you had brought to england with you. you didn't know all of what was in lena's bag, but you weren't sure if you'd be able to handle the strap when she was ready for it.
"did any of the other girls make you cum like this?" lena asked. she knew that you wouldn't be able to answer her, just like she knew what the answer was. you were writhing under lena's touch, moving both for more and to get away. "i love the way that you feel around my fingers. it's the perfect fit, just another reason that you're always gonna come back to me."
"s-slow down," you warned. lena backed up and dropped down so that her head was between your legs now. you were clenching around nothing with her fingers now grasping at your hips as she cleaned up the mess of arousal with her tongue. it was with lena's tongue sucking on your clit that your second orgasm melted into the third. lena knew what it would take to get you to absolutely soak the bed, but she could tell from the way that you weakly pushed her away you couldn't handle it.
for a moment, everything felt too bright and too cold. lena's body was no longer on yours, but you felt the bed dip again in a matter of seconds. lena was between your legs once more wiping away the mess that had been made. she was gentle with a touch lighter than a feather. she laid with you after, holding you against her chest as you regained your composure.
"can i get up to take my dress off now?" you asked her. lena whined as you started to move away from her. she was usually a little clingy after sex, but this was something else entirely. lena sat on the edge of the bed and moved along with you, watching as you got into your pajamas.
"i love you," lena told you as you got back into bed with her. she was all over you once again, but this time in a much more innocent manner. "i don't ever want to be with anybody else."
"i love you too, lena." you knew what she was looking for. you knew what lena wanted to hear, and you'd repeat it again and again for as long as she needed. "i'm yours, just yours, okay?"
"yeah, i know that. it wasn't like i was jealous or anything," lena huffed.
"so, that wasn't you sitting in the booth pouting for half the night once my friends showed up?" you asked her. lena muttered something under her breath in german, knowing that you didn't understand a word of it. you didn't bother to ask her what she had said, knowing that it was most likely her trying to refute that she had been jealous at all. you had hear every excuse, both in english and german, and it was never any more believable than the last time.
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prttykittes · 10 months
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staying anon for this bec i feel disgusting indulging in this.
i’m big on dark/dddne stuff and yet I feel terrible reading it so i’m kinda glad i found somewhere i can kindof have a place to express more extreme stuff.
anyways big sis beidou wants to be your first so right when you turn 18 she takes your virginity :3
or dad zhongli sees that your bf is not what he thinks a BF should be like to he takes him out and makes you his. i mean this is more of a possessiveness than actual NSFW. i dont know😭
Stoner kazuha roofies you (with prior consent tho w this one)
Diluc gives you too much to drink so he fucks you instead.
i have so much more.. and if i ever do come back i’ll be “:3 anon”
do what you want w any of these 💕
Woahh:0, there's alot so I tried my best to do everything blog, I won't shame anyone for liking these things kind of stuff!!<3
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ෆ Big!sis Beidou, Stoner!Kazuha, dad!zhongli, diluc X Afab!Reader [you/your]
— Synopsis:: multiple characters x reader, yeah
CW. Incest(father/child, Sister/slibing), smokes, weed, roofies, consent(Kazuha), dubcon(for everyone else), possessive sex(zhongli), drunk sex(Diluc), age gaps, fingering, Dom!characters x Sub!reader, reader wears pants in kazuha's part
A/N :: Multiple sexy characters :4— written by a minor
[MASTERLIST] — ╰⁠(⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠´⁠꒳⁠`⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠⸝⁠)⁠╯ works in link!
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BIG SIS! Beidou ! — She was so happy for you! It was your birthday! She got off her boat and went to your parents house! She saw you, you were still gorgeous as ever! She tears up, she was with for 18 years, her lovely slibing.... Oh how she dreamed about this day, she wants to be your first. So she's going to take you to her boat since you had always wanted to go on the water with her! She would spent time with you on there, just you and her. She celebrated your birthday, then she asked if you wanted to go on a ride. You said yes, now your both on her boat but instead of familial love it was filled with romantical love. She was half she was your first, she at first toying with your nipples. She went lower, she can hear you breathing heavily. Your eyes are hazy, your mind cloudy. Her hand was your sex, she rubbed it. She sees your lovely juices on her fingers, she can't wait to claim you as hers. Her sweet, lovely slibing all hers!
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STONER!Kazhu— The smell of weed brunt your nose, he was smiling at you. His hand on his chin, his eyes were slightly red. He had his eyes on you, you sat down next to him. "{Yourname}" he says, you tilt your head in confusion. He gets up, his legs slightly trembling, he wraps his arms around you. "Can I?" He said, you knew what he had wanted to do. You never went this far in your friendship with him! You did have dreams and did wish for him to like you, you also had sexual dreams about him. You can't believe what your going to do with him, he smiles. He grabs some pills, he was going to roofie you but instead of doing it without consent. He has your consent, you close your eyes and take it. You gulp and your head feels weird, your eyes become hazy. He smiles and gently lies you on the bed. He is on-top of you, he lays soft and gentle bites on your neck. He continues to do while his kisses gets lower, you close your eyes and let yourself into the pleasure. He toys with your chest, rolling your nipples between his fingers. He pulls down your pants and touches your sex through your underwear. His finger going up and down, pressing on it. "Your so cute..." He mutters, he take soff your underwear and Lena's down and licks at your sex. He smiles when your sex twitches. He coats his fingers in your pre-cum, then he prods his finger at your hole. His fingers scissor your virgin hole, making you more open for dick. You can feel his clothed dick against your leg while he continues to finger you, after some minutes. He stops and and pulls down his pants so his underwear shows and he slides his underwear down and his dick jumps up. He aims his cock at your hole, your hole clenches around nothing as you anxiously wait for it. He grabs a condom and enters you, his hard dick inside of you. He moves once you get used of his size. The motion is lazy and tried but it still feels good. Your virgin hole is not a Virgin anymore!!!
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DAD!ZHONGLI !— He doesn't deserve his sweet baby! He stares at you and your boyfriend, he isn't a boyfriend. His boyfriend ideals for you are something like him!! He angrily glares and judges your boyfriend from afar. He can't believe that you chose someone that is trash, he gets so mad that he gets rid of your boyfriend... Oh I wonder how he got so bloody and why he is covered in blood.. don't worry it's not his!!don't worry baby, no need to worry about anything~ he comforts you after you find out your boyfriend is dead, shhh.... You still have him, your daddy is always here for you!! He won't leave you, he is going to make you his, not like you weren't his from the start! His kisses start form your temple to near your lips, his hands on your thigh to inner thighs. You sniff as you lean into his touch, just enjoy his touches. he slips his hand into your pajamas pants, touching your underwear. He continues to kiss your neck, wanting to mark you with his kisses and his touches. His fingers touch your sex and he slips his hand into your underwear, he smiles as he can feel your sex being wet. He pleasures you with his touches, he can't wait to claim you for his own. Emptying his seed inside of you!
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DILUC !— He watches you, you weren't this drink from the start but you know... Things change, he continues to give you more. You were worried about the drinks because you wouldn't have enough to pay but you don't care anymore. Your drunken state, it exitces him but it's only with you. He gives you two more drinks and you drink it up fast like you want to please him... Your flustered face makes him want to kiss you and fuck your face but he can't bring himself to do so~ you let out hiccups and you lay your head on the table. He cleans the empty cups and gives you one more, you grab it weakly as you managed to drink it. You rant to him about annoying people and troubles in your life, he smiles as he listens to you. Your face still on the table, your hands are in a fist but then it goes limp. He hears soft snores from you, he walks around and rubs your hips. He blows in your ear, you still don't wake up. Your body is asleep and he could take advantage of it. He groans while he moves you over to more of a comfortable spot. He takes off your lower clothing and slides down your underwear. He sticks his finger in a cup as it is soaked with the alcohol, he pushes inside of you. Your loose and not tight, your whole body being loose. He kisses your forehead and continues to finger your hole, he lets out a grunt. His dick is really hard, he pulls out his cock and aims it at your hole. He can't wait anymore, he spits on his palm and rubs it on his dick. It's unsanitary but whatever because he is going to be inside of you!! His dick enters you, he lets out a groan, he moves his hips. It feels so good, he should do this more often to you until he gains courage to ask you out!!
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scarletts-scribbles · 8 months
Note
Reader works for Lena that turns into working buddies with benefits, but reader starts catching feelings. Maybe angst but happy ending?
Highly Unprofessional
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⁀➷ Pairing: Lena Luthor x Reader
⁀➷ Notes: Okay so I haven’t written smut properly before so hopefully this is a decent attempt :,) Let me know what you think! Sorry this took a while, its like 3k words long so editing was a bitch.
⁀➷ Summary: When a one-time hookup turns into a regular occurance, it sets off a chain of events which you're helpless to stop.
⁀➷ WARNINGS: 18+ Minors DNI, fingering, cunnilingus, semi-public (I mean its in her office but the door was open oopsie)
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
In the bustling chaos of corporate life, where stress reigns supreme the last thing you want to do is mix business and your personal life. It only ever ended in disaster.
When you’d first moved to National City, you’d never imagined just a few short months later you’d be working directly under the city’s most prevenient businesswoman. Lena Luthor was a force to be reckoned with. It was a miracle you’d gotten the position of her assistant at all, your CV was sharp, but it wasn’t anything to be in awe of so when you’d got the call that you’d received the job it was safe to say she was over the moon.
It taken a little while to warm up to you. She’d been a rather cold at first. Not that you could blame her of course, given her family history. However slowly but surely you found her opening up more to you, building up her trust gradually. In the meantime, whilst she’d grown to depend on your assistance, you payed close attention and slowly learnt her tells. You knew when Lena was upset, she’d get that little crinkle in her brows or that when she was anxious, she’d gently bite the left corner of her lip. Infact you’d become so observant of her habits and body language that sometimes you knew how she was feeling before she’d register the emotions herself.
One particularly hectic day in the bustling office, the air thick with tension, you noticed Lena pacing nervously in her office. The telltale signs were there – the crinkle in her brows, the subtle lip-biting – Lena was clearly on edge about the upcoming meeting with a major client.
Truth to told, seeing her like this made you feel anxious as well. How could someone as powerful and accomplished as Lena get so nervous? You’dhad never seen her like this before, and it was almost like seeing a completely different person.
You had to help.
You knocked gentle on the door, clearing your throat quietly to announce your presence, “Miss Luthor?”
A wave of relief washed over Lena as she heard your voice calling through the door. This meeting had been weighing heavily on her mind, and she was desperate to find some way to relax before it started.
“You know you can call me Lena.” She smiled and nodded for you to enter.
You stepped into the room and approached Lena with the gentle warmth and confidence that always radiated from you. She found herself walking over to you, looking at you deeply before taking a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. You took her closeness as a chance to reach out to squeeze her shoulder and when she didn’t object, you softly applied pressure to her muscles.
“Fuck.” She let the curse split out involuntarily before trying to regain herself, “Do you need something from me?”
“You’re tense, let me help?” You mumbled softly to which she nodded. Your touch was like a balm for her. As you began subtly massaging Lena's shoulders, the tension began to subside, and her frown faded away, you let your hand slide down to her wrist, holding it gently as you pulled her over to the pristine sofa at the other side of her office, “Come, sit.”
"Thank you." Lena took a deep breath and sunk into the seat. She could feel the stress and anxiety that had been weighing heavily on her began to melt away. She turned her head toward you and smiled softly, letting out a sigh of relief. Lena gave in and allowed herself to sink deep into your warm embrace. With her worries temporarily relieved, she closed her eyes and began to enjoy the feeling of your hands working away at her tension.
Leaning in, you reached to place a comforting hand on her thigh, feeling the subtle tension in her muscles. You had no intention’s behind the action. Your touch was light, meant to reassure rather than intrude. But Lena’s eyes slowly opened and cast over to meet yours, her emerald green iris's seemingly sparkling with a new found feeling.
It was obvious she was a little surprised by the gesture, but there was a moment of pause. She tried to be professional, but her body was responding positively to the touch.
The feeling was both calming and exciting, sending a shiver of desire down her spine, the creeping onset on desire making her leg’s bounce nervously.
She looked into your eyes and saw the unmistakable spark of attraction between the pair of you. Of course she’d noticed your lokg glances before and she wasn’t ashamed to say she’d given you some the day you’d left her office when you’d interviewed for the position. Her previous tension was soon replaced with a subtle feeling of arousal, and she couldn't help but crave more.
"Could you...keep going?" she whispered, words shaking through her soft yet overwhelming sensual voice - filled with desire.
“You mean?” Your voice was quiet as you very slowly moved your hand up her thigh, waiting for to confirm her consent, “Is this okay? I need to hear you say it Lena.”
"Keep going," Lena whispered. Her voice was raspy from the tension, but there was no mistaking the excitement in her voice. She wanted you to keep touching her. She craved it. Soaked in the intimacy of your touch. "Please..."
The feeling of your hand gliding over her thighs was intoxicating, sending shivers of arousal through her body. You teased her lightly, fingers reaching her line of her panties. You could hardly fight back your own growing blush at the feeling of the wet fabric. Lena let out a soft moan as you softly ran your finger around her entrance – she was so sensitive. Her eyes closed once again as she leaned back into the couch, surrounding herself to your touch.
Your touch was intoxicating. You kept it light, but your slow strokes were sending her body into ecstasy. Lena's breaths grew shallow as she leaned toward you, her lips meeting yours in an intimate kiss.
"Don't stop," she whispered against your lips, her body urging you to keep going as you edged her sodden clit, rubbing circles as her back arched involuntarily.
“I wasn’t planning on it.” You whispered back with a husky tone as your fingers continued to work their magic on her. You could feel the heat radiating off her body, adding to the intoxicating atmosphere. Your touch became firmer, getting closer to her core, making sure every stroke and tease was intense. You were doing your job finely, the way she moaned into your mouth was driving you wild with validation, knowing you were making her feel good. Truely you were completely under her control, willing to do anything she desired - anything to please her.
With each passing moment, the lust between you both grew more intense, fuelling your passion. Both your excitement only grew with every teasing touch and feather-light kiss. You knew she enjoyed the buildup of anticipation just as much as you did. In the heat of the moment, time seemed to stand still as you lost yourself to the moment.
Your hand never stopped tracing along her sensitive folds as Lena’s moans grew louder, encouraging you to continue. She kissed you again and the kiss deepened as she pushed against you, urging you to take control. Her body ached for you as you pressed your fingers against her entrance, playing with her and teasing her. You held her deep in your embrace, feeling her shudder helplessly, her body giving into yours as you continued to stroke her. Finally, you gave into the inevitable and pushed inside, finally giving her the release, she craved.
Lena writhed beneath you, gasping for breath as you drove her toward climax. She muscles were tight against your fingers and you couldnt feel your hand going a little numb from how hard her thighs were squeezed together. She kept her hands clenched in your hair as you felt her body convulsing beneath yours. She moaned, high desperate sounds before finally, with a shudder of ecstasy, she peaked. Her back arching helplessly as she reached her climaxed under your guide.
Once she’d caught her breath, you carefully pulled out of her, making sure to be gentle against her sensitivities. You stroked her hair tenderly, feeling her body begin to relax against you as she came down down from her high.
"Do you feel better now?" you asked her, as she leaned back against you, still breathing heavily from the experience.
Lena sighed softly, a satisfied smile on her face, “So much better," she replied, her voice still light and breathless from the rush "Thank you for helping me relax.”
You brushed your fingers across her cheek, lingering for a beat. The intimacy of the moment was intoxicating, the shared look of pleasure and satisfaction. You couldn't help but wonder if there was more to it than just stress relief. As your head wandered the clouds, you didn’t notice Lena fixing her hair, tying it back in a tight ponytail.
She checked her watch, seemingly debating something for a moment before her voice pulled you back down to reality, “I think we’ve got just enough time.” She said, sitting back down against you, pulling on of your legs over hers, opening you up.
“Enough time for what?”
Lena smirked mischievously, tugging at the edge of your skirt. “For me to return the favour...”
・゚: ・゚: ゚・
That had been the first of many times you’d helped her relax. It had become a sort of ritual really. Whenever she’d have a big meeting or important event coming up, she’d come to you to help her unwind. Truthfully the first it’d happened; it had taken you a few days to really process it all. The experience had changed you. You couldn’t just see her as your boss anymore. She was more than that. Lena had always had a stunning body of course but now it was almost as if though you couldn’t keep her eyes off her.
The ways her hips curved had you weak in the knees, it wasn’t just her physical attributes though. It was everything, the weak she spoke, the way she held herself. It was intoxicating. Safe to say you were happy to lend a hand whenever needed. Maybe you could’ve kept this up forever, helping her out without a second thought – she was still your boss after all. But this latest time had changed something in you.
It had started off in its usual way, you’d seen the meeting scheduled on the calendar and let yourself into her office – the two of you were way past knocking now. Lena knew what was about to happen, she’d been waiting for it.
As you entered her office, Lena didn't waste any time before pulling you closer to her. You felt the heat and need radiating off of her as she kissed you passionately, her hands moving greedily over your body. You moaned as she pushed you up against the desk, her mouth hot against your neck.
Suddenly, she pulled back, looking at you with a predatory glint in her eyes. "Do you know what I want to do to you?" she whispered, her voice low with desire as her tender fingers danced down the front of your shirt - making a show out of unbuttoning them.
As she spoke, Lena left the kiss and moved down your body with purpose, her lips and tongue leaving a trail of heat and anticipation down your torso. Your hands found her hair, pulling it as if to guide her further where you wanted her. But the CEO had plans of her own. She knew what she wanted and she wanted it now, right this moment. So much so that she hadn’t even bothered closing her office door.
Without warning, she pushed your shoulders down, forcing you to sit on her desk. Lena smirked, moving in to kiss you deeply, so deep that it left you chasing her lips as she pulled away. Without a pause, she pushed your legs apart and planted herself between them, her eagerness so apparent it sent a shiver of desire right through you.
You could feel her looking up at you as she kissed through the fabric of your panties, her hands moving to stroke and soothe wherever they could reach.
You couldn't help but moan now, one hand coming to grip her hair and the other gripping the edge of the desk with such force that your knuckles turned white. You were helpless to resist as Lena worked her way deeper, your grip became more frenzied, less able to control yourself.
It hadn’t taken long before your panties had been pulled down and Lena was happily satisfying herself on your clit whilst you slowly grinded against her face, desire driving you wild.
Then something suddenly caught your attention. You heard someone in the hall…
You tried to voice this but through your whimpers, not much was articulated. Despite this, Lena didn't even flinch when she’d heard them, seemingly not bothered by the accompanying approaching footsteps.
Instead, she kept going, her tongue working magic on you as she held your hips steady with one hand. You could hear people talking just outside the open door, but Lena didn't seem to care. In fact, it seemed to turn her on even more - the thrill of getting caught.
You tried to stifle your moans, but it was impossible with Lena's skilled mouth on you. Your body was writhing on the edge of the desk, your toes curling as the pleasure built and built. And still, she didn't stop.
Lena never broke eye contact with you as she continued to work her tongue and lips over your pussy, sending you further and further into ecstasy. The sounds of voices in the hallway were drowned out by your moans, which the Luthor seemed to be enjoying immensely.
She added a couple of fingers inside you, curling them just right to hit your sweet spot, and you felt your body convulse in response. You couldn't hold back anymore, and you came hard, your body shaking with the force of it.
Lena didn't stop, though; she kept going, licking and sucking until you were overstimulated and sensitive. Finally, she stood up, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand as she grinned down at you.
“You’re so fucking hot.” She laughed, the sound of her voice sending shivers down your spine again.
Your cheeks blushed crimson as you cleaned yourself up, “Do you want me-” You took a step forward but stopped when she held out her hand, shaking her head as she fixed her hair.
“I just wanted you darling, nothing more. Now if you’ll excuse me. I’ve got a meeting to attend too.”
With that Lena smoothed out the crease in her skirt before heading out the door, leaving you to catch your breath, still perched upon her table.
Darling?
The pet name replayed over and over in your head as the day passed by. You couldn’t stop thinking about her, about these sessions.
It wasn’t just about favours anymore. It felt like she had wanted you. You’d wanted her. God you’d been trying so hard to ignore the fact you’d crave her touch when you were alone. It had gotten to the point where you’d started to miss simply being around her. In fact you’d started coming in earlier and leaving later just to be near her. But you had tried to ignore it. Dammit! Why couldn’t you stop thinking about it!
The rational part of your brain was telling you to pull back, to remind yourself that her actions were just physical and didn't mean anything more. But the other part of you, the part that craved the closeness and heat of your body wanted her for more. You wanted to feel more than just the pleasure of their bodies. You wanted to build a connection, a partnership. You wanted more.
Oh shit... You wanted love.
The realisation had made you sick. What you wanted could never happen. You knew Lena’s life; it was busy and packed. She didn’t have time for something solid. It was why your little favours had worked so well. You’d kept each other going. You could hardly tell her that you wanted more.
Goddamn it!
゚: ・゚: ゚・
The ringing it your ears hadn’t really faded since you’d realised. You’d called out of work the past 2 days; you couldn’t bring yourself to look at her. Her eyes were a tease, a reminder of what you couldn’t have. Instead, you’d stayed home, trying to wrap your head around all the feelings swirling round in your head, your rapid thoughts never seemed to slow down long enough for you to process them.
You were in love with Lena Luthor.
You were in love with your boss…
Casual sex! That was all it was meant to be, no, no, no! How could you let yourself fall like this?
In all honesty, it felt like you were grieving. Grieving something you could never have. Something forbidden. It was awful.
You felt like shit. It had taken most of your energy to make the treacherous journey from your bed to the sofa - there was no point getting dressed. It wasn’t like you were going to work today anyway. You couldn’t bare the thought of facing her, the thought of it ate you up inside.
As you lay on your sofa, consumed by the weight of your emotions, a knock on the door suddenly startled you. You contemplated just ignoring it, hoping whoever it is will just get the hint, go away and leave you alone. However, the knocking persists, growing louder and more insistent with each rap.
With a heavy sigh, you dragged yourself off the sofa and reluctantly opened the door. To your surprise, it was Lena standing there. A concerned expression etched across her face. Her usual confident demeanor seemed softened by genuine worry.
"Lena?" you mumbled, your voice barely above a whisper.
She stepped inside without waiting for an invitation, scanning the disarrayed room. "I've been trying to reach you for days. What's going on? Why haven't you been at work?”
Lena's concerned gaze met yours, and you could sense the weight of unspoken questions in her eyes. Your throat tightened, grappling with the words you hadn't dared to say.
"I... I just needed some time to think," you admitted, avoiding direct eye contact with her, staring hard at the floor, "Things have... changed.”
Her brow furrowed as she took in the gravity of your words. "Changed how?"
You hesitated, then let out a defeated sigh, "I can't keep doing this, Lena. Us. Secretly fucking each other at work just because we can. I don’t want to just be someone of the side anymore, I want to be more than that."
There was a moment of silence as Lena processed your words. Tension hung heavy over the room, a silence so thick you could’ve slice it with a knife, and you wondered if you had just ruined whatever fragile arrangement existed between you.
Finally, Lena spoke up, her soft voice wavering as she spoke, "More? What do you mean?"
"I mean..." You paused, gathering your courage. "I want a real relationship, Lena. Not just these secret little rendezvous we keep having. Lena, I want something genuine."
Her eyes searched yours, and for a moment, you saw a flicker of vulnerability. "I didn't think... I didn't know you wanted that," she admitted, her usual confidence waning.
"I do," You nodded slowly, affirming your words, "I can't keep pretending that this is enough for me. I want more than just physical connection; I want an emotional one too."
Lena took a hesitant step closer, the distance between you diminishing. "I thought we were both on the same page, I thought-.”
"No, Lena, I can't do this anymore," you repeated, the weight of your unspoken desires finally finding a voice, “I can’t keep pretending I’m fine with this anymore. I’m sorry but I just can’t.”
Lena's expression shifted, torn between conflicting emotions. The room hung in suspended silence, waiting for her response.
Lena’s eyes softened, and a vulnerable smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "I never realised how much you wanted this," she admitted, a hint of regret in her voice. "Maybe I've been too guarded, too afraid to admit it to myself…”
You felt a mix of relief and hope as Lena continued, “I'd think I’d like to try a real relationship too…”
There it was. The sentence that changed your life. You had a chance with Lena and you weren’t going to let it pass you by. Maybe this time, mixing your business and personal life wouldn’t end in disaster after all… even if it was horribly unprofessional.
✧・゚: *
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helen-with-an-a · 1 month
Note
Lena Oberdorf
Enemies to Lovers fic?
It isn't really enemies to lovers but I think it's kinda cute? I hope you enjoy it <3<3<3
Hatred
Lena Oberdorf x Reader
Description: A miscommunication led to years of hatred between R and Lena
Word Count: 2k
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It had been a pretty rough ride for you to say the least. You were just 15 when you made your professional debut. At the time, it had been all you ever wanted, professional football at such a young age. Who wouldn’t want that? But like most young players who started their career too early, you were plagued by injuries. An ACL at just 18 years old and a meniscus tear at 20. It had been a long, long road to recovery, but you were just beginning to reach the levels you once were. The previous season had been your first full one back since you were 18 years old and you were storming ahead.
You had completed the season with SGS Essen, and you had gone from strength to strength. It was a true come back story. A player riddled with injuries becoming integral to her team’s defensive line. In fact, you were doing so well that you were gaining attention from top teams all over Europe.
You hadn’t really intended on moving teams, you still had a season left on your contract with Essen, but this was an offer no one could pass up. It happened late in the transfer window. Just days before it closed. Your agent had called and you were in a meeting with the higher ups within hours. You didn’t really want to leave – you liked it at Essen, there was pressure to perform well, of course there was, but there wasn’t the intenseness that you had felt prior to your injury.
You had been expected to make the move to Wolfsburg during the Covid outbreaks, but during a training session with the club, you had felt the pop and heard the snap. Wolfsburg rescinded their offer for you as a young defensive midfielder, arguing that nothing had been signed and stating that they couldn’t take you on since you would cost them so much time, money and effort to get fit again. It was a risk they weren’t willing to take. It had broken your heart when you were told, but with a little cajoling from your teammates and the staff at Essen, you had turned that disappointment into fire. A fire to be better than you ever were before.
Your heart had shattered into a million pieces when you found out who Wolfsburg had signed instead of you. The same age, the same position, hell even the same team. Lena’s farewell picture and signing announcement happened within moments of each other. To say you were devastated would have been an understatement. You were friends. Good friends. Maybe there could have been something more between you if the time was right. Was that why it hurt so much when she had disappeared without warning, without telling you? Maybe that was why it felt like she had just thrown you under the bus. Your loss was her gain, right?
You never anticipated that you would be doing the same thing to her a few years later. You hadn’t quite made it back to the international level just yet, but you were getting there. You still had many friends on the team, so you liked to watch their games. You saw her go down and knew almost instantly what it was. You saw the way her knee popped and moved. You heard her shouts. Your heart was breaking all over again as you saw her get carried off the pitch. You had debated messaging her – you had even gone so far as to click on her Instagram profile and go into the messages. You backed out when you saw what the last message you had sent was.
8th June 2020, 12:13
yourusername: https://www.tiktok.com...
yourusername: how fucking cute is that ^^^^
yourusername: also
yourusername: https://www.tiktok.com...
yourusername: I wanna make this for lunch ^^^^
lena_oberdorf: omg cutieeeeeee
lena_oberdorf: ooooo that looks so good
lena_oberdorf: ugh i want it now too
8th June 2020, 15:04
yourusername: You signed for Wolfsburg?
lena_oberdorf: Right?????? How insane is that?
8th June 2020, 15:34
lena_oberdorf: Y/N????
8th June 2020, 23:56pm
yourusername: You backstabbing bitch
9th June 2020, 01:37
lena_oberdorf: huh?
lena_oberdorf: what did I do?
lena_oberdorf: Y/N
lena_oberdorf: Is something wrong?
lena_oberdorf: Did I do something?
lena_oberdorf: Y/N/N?
lena_oberdorf: ????
10th June 2020, 12:40
lena_oberdorf: please
10th June 2020, 15:19
yourusername: Don’t ever talk to me again
lena_oberdorf: What did I do? Please? Y/N/N???
yourusername: Fuck off
You remembered everything. The pain, the hurt, the frustration, the fear, the anger. You didn’t mean a word of what you said, even back then and especially now. But how could she had signed to Wolfsburg when she knew that you were the young defensive midfielder they were signing for the upcoming season. The pain had settled into guilty not even 30 seconds after you sent it. But you were hurt and embarrassed and broken hearted.
You hadn’t realised that you were doing the same thing to her. You knew that she had signed for Bayern back in January. You had tried your best to ignore it, but it was major news in the Bundesliga. The transfer seemed almost rushed. One moment you were sitting rather happily in your little flat, the next you were in the SGS Essen’s main offices, and then you were in the car, pack up and ready to make the move down to Munich.
The dreams you had harboured since you were a child seemed within reach. The club’s history, the chance to play alongside some of the best players in the world, it was all you could think about. But the thought of leaving Essen weighed heavily on you. This club had been your home, your sanctuary during the toughest times of your life. The support from the fans, the camaraderie with your teammates, it all made leaving incredibly difficult.
The meeting with Bayern's representatives was intense. They laid out their vision for the team, how they saw you fitting into their plans, and the opportunities that awaited you. It was everything you had ever wanted to hear. But there was a part of you that kept thinking about Essen, about Lena, and about how history seemed to be repeating itself.
You had a sleepless night before making your decision. The messages with Lena replayed in your mind, reminding you of the hurt you had felt and the hurt you had caused. You didn't want to be the reason someone else felt that same pain. But you also knew that this opportunity was a once-in-a-lifetime chance. You had to take it, not just for yourself but for everyone who had supported you through your journey.
Your arrival was a little awkward. It was clear who Lena’s friends were and where they stood with you. It was a hard pill to swallow, considering a lot of them used to be your friends too, but that was in the past. You were here and had a job to do.
On the pitch, everything was fine. You were all professionals, and it was clear that you were doing your jobs. By the Christmas break, Bayern was well on the way to take the league title again and were doing well in the Champions League and the Cup as well. It was off the pitch that things became less friendly. Lena was recovering well, but it was clear she still had some work to do to get back to match day fitness. You were in the room with her the first time she ran on the treadmill. The memories were an almost constant in your mind, those first steps, the first run, the first time out on the grass. You couldn’t help yourself but look over and join in the cheering when she started up the machine.
It was afterwards that things took a turn for the worst. You had coincidentally finished in the gym the same time as her physio appointment. Normally, this was no bother, you had been skirting around in silence for months now and you were well-versed in ignoring each other. But this time round, she had slipped in the bathrooms. The small puddle of water that had been left by you after the shower was invisible to her as she made her way into the end stall.
You heard the shout and the loud clatter as she landed in a heap.
“Oh, my god.” You raced back into the room, intending to help her back to her feet.
“Don’t touch me,” she yelled. You took a step backwards, stuck halfway between leaning down to help and backing away from her anger. “Are you trying to fucking kill me or something?”
“Lena, I’m sorry. I-”
“What was it you called me? A backstabbing bitch? Takes one to know one, I guess.” She was standing now, her body seething in anger.
“Lena,” you tried to speak.
“No! You called me a backstabbing bitch for no apparent reason and here you are taking my spot on the team! What? Just ‘cos you couldn’t get into Bayern without a player being injured, you have to keep injuring me? Is that it?” Did she really think that?
“I-, No apparent reason? Fuck off Lena,” you shouted back, using anger as a way to mask the hurt. “You know exactly what you did. And talk about not being able to get into a club without an injury? Please, Wolfsburg only signed you since they couldn’t have me.” You snapped back
“What?” she spun back around to face you, your bodies so close you were almost touching.
“You are a total backstabber. You saw that Wolfsburg took back their offer and signed instead.” You willed yourself not to cry.
“Huh?” you could tell there was genuine confusion in her face.
“Wolfsburg’s offer? Back when you left Essen?”
“What about when I left Essen?”
“It was supposed to be me,” you exploded. “Wolfsburg told my agent that they could only afford one of the defending midfielders from Essen. I had the contract drawn up and everything. It was supposed to be me.”
The silence in the room was electric, the tension palpable. You were nose to nose. One slight adjustment and your lips would be on hers. Your breath hitched. Since when did you think of Lena like that? She was the bad guy here. Why were you thinking about that? She had been a friend, a really good friend. You would be lying to say that there wasn't something bubbling underneath. But then she left for Wolfsburg. Maybe that was why it hurt so much?
“Why didn’t you go?” Lena asked quietly.
“They took back their offer. I did my ACL just before I signed with them. And then you swooped in and took my spot. You knew how much I wanted to play with them. And you did it anyway.” The tears welled in your eyes. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. You cannot let her see you cry.
Lena's expression softened, her anger dissolving into something that looked like understanding, or maybe regret. She took a step back and resting against the sinks, shaking her head slowly. You tried to ignore the way your heart sank as she moved away.
“I didn’t know,” she murmured. “I had no idea. I would never have done that. Especially not to you.” She looked like she wanted to say more, but thought better of it.
You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest in a defensive gesture. “How could you not know? We were friends, Lena. We ... I ... You knew how much that offer meant to me.”
Lena looked up at you, her eyes filled with a mixture of guilt and pain. “I thought... I don’t know what I thought. I was told you weren’t going to be able to play, that your injury was too severe. When they offered me the spot, I thought it was because you weren’t an option anymore. I didn’t realise it was... I didn’t know it was because they pulled your offer.” She looked like she was reevaluating everything.
You stared at her, your anger battling with the seeds of doubt creeping into your mind. Could it be that she really hadn’t known? The timing had been so perfect, too perfect, but now, looking into her eyes, you saw the sincerity there.
“You really didn’t know?” you asked, your voice wavering.
She shook her head. “No. If I had known... I don’t know what I would have done. But I wouldn’t have taken the offer without talking to you first. You have to believe that.” She pushed herself off the sink, covering the small distance between you in moments.
The weight of her words settled over you, and the anger that had been your constant companion for so long began to fade, replaced by a hollow sadness. You had lost a friend over this, and maybe, just maybe, it hadn’t been entirely her fault.
“I’ve been carrying this anger for so long,” you said quietly, more to yourself than to her. “I blamed you for everything.” Her hand came up to cup your cheek. This wasn't new, you had been ... something ... back at Essen, never crossing that line but the boundaries had been blurred. Your skin felt like it was on fire wherever she touched you.
Lena nodded, tears glistening in her eyes. “And I’ve been carrying the guilt. Every time I saw you play, every time I saw your name in the news, I wondered if you hated me. I guess I know the answer now.” She rested her forehead against yours. She was so close. You closed your eyes, letting her cinnamon scent drift over you.
You both stood in silence, the weight of the past hanging heavily between you. Finally, you took a deep breath and looked at her.
“I,” you started, your voice shaking. “I ... I don't really know what to say. Maybe we can try again? I don’t want to hate you anymore, Lena. It’s exhausting.”
She smiled, a small, tentative smile, but it was a start. “I’d like that,” she said softly. “I’d really like that.”
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tkwrites · 2 months
Text
It Doesn't Matter - Part II - Nico Hischier x ofc
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Gif from offside-the-lines
Title: It Doesn’t Matter - Part II
Part I | Part II | Part III | Playlist
Author: Tory / @tkwrites 
Relationship: Beginning: Nico Hischier x Original female character 
Summary: When Nico agreed to pose for Lena as her nude model, he never expected how difficult it would be or where the night would take them. 
Warnings: Slow burn, talk of lots of anxiety, being naked for the sake of art, smut at the end (18+): handjob (f on m) fingering (m on f) 
Word count: 12,200
Comments: This fic has taken on a bit of a mind of its own. It’s much, much longer than I originally envisioned, but I couldn’t bear to cut any of it down. I hope you like it as much as I do and enjoy Nico and Lena finally sharing their feelings for each other. 
If you enjoyed this, please let me know by commenting, reblogging, or sending in an ask. Your encouragement and comments truly inspire me to keep writing. 
It Doesn’t Matter - Part II 
“I feel like I shouldn’t eat before,” Nico said, looking down at the spread of sushi that had just been delivered to the apartment. 
“Why not?” 
“So I’m not…” he patted his stomach affectionately. Not only would he be immortalized in her art, he didn’t want the first time she saw him naked to include being bloated from eating too much rice. 
Lena flipped her hand and shook her head, “the whole point of a nude study is to see a human figure as it is, not as someone who's prepped for three days or something.” 
He looked unconvinced. 
“Do whatever you feel comfortable with, but don’t get hangry on me,” she warned, pointing her chopsticks at him.
Holding up his hands in surrender, he laughed. 
He ate but stopped as soon as he felt the mildest hint of fullness. He could eat more when they were done. 
“So, do I just get naked?” he joked, sliding the plastic takeout containers into the fridge. 
She snorted, but the tips of her ears flared pink. 
“I…kind of hoped…” her voice trailed off. She wasn’t sure if she could just come out and ask for what she wanted. If he were a hired model, she would have asked him to come in a specific outfit, but this was Nico, and he was doing this as a favor. 
“What?” he asked, unsure why she was being so hesitant. He was doing this for her. Didn't she know he would do just about anything for her? “Do you want me to wear something specific?” 
Well, if he was offering. “Can you put on some dark suit pants with a belt?” 
That wasn’t so bad. “Anything else?”
“No socks.” She knew he didn’t love to be barefoot, but for this, they would go against the picture and story she was building in her mind. 
“Does it matter what color boxers?” he asked instead of protesting. He couldn’t remember what color he’d put on that morning. 
Just thinking about seeing him in his boxers made her blush. Which was so stupid. She’d walked into the kitchen just the week before, only to find him walking around in nothing more than a tiny pair of black boxer briefs. They’d hugged his ass so tightly that she could see the muscles shift every time he moved.  
Finally managing to shake her head and desperate to change the subject, she blurted, “I’m going to go set up in the living room.”
Nico smiled at how flustered she was as he went to change. Maybe Nina was right. At the very least, she might not be totally wrong. 
“Maybe I’m just reading too much into it,” Nina had said when he had called his siblings in a panic the day before, trying to figure out how exactly he was going to get through this. “But I think you should give it a try. At least tell her how you feel. You don’t see the way she looks at you.” 
He did see the way she looked at him. The same way she always had. Friendly and open and kind. But that was it. It never went beyond that.
“And what if I tell her and she turns me down? Or what if I tell her, and she says she doesn’t feel that way? I can’t just go back to how it was before. I can’t just take it back.”
“Isn’t it killing you to not tell her?” Luca asked. He didn’t understand it as well as Nina did, and had both feet firmly in camp ‘grow a pair and tell her,’ like Jack. 
He gave a non-committal shrug. It was killing him. No, that was too dramatic. It wasn’t killing him, but it was making him a little crazy to feel so much intense emotion without having anywhere to put it. 
Nina was tired of having this same discussion with him, which had only increased in frequency when Lena moved in. If she knew for a fact Lena wouldn’t turn him down, she wouldn’t hesitate to bully her little brother into spilling his guts. But as it was, she couldn’t guarantee anything.
“I’m going to make an ass of myself,” Nico moaned. 
“You are not,” Nina admonished at the same time Luca said, “so what if you do?” 
Luca continued before either of them could jump in, “you make an ass out of yourself every day you don’t tell her the truth.” 
Nico had glared, and Nina had rolled her eyes.
In any case, knowing Lena was also nervous took some of his nerves down, too. At least he wasn’t alone in that. 
Pulling out her art supplies, Lena felt like she might throw up. She was nervous and excited, and also so worried she wouldn’t be able to capture him. The last thing she wanted was to make Nico look flat. 
Although landscapes were her specialty, the Institute insisted every artist get a full education, crossing over as many mediums and styles as possible. Even if it wasn’t the students' specialty, lots of things could be learned from going outside your own box. 
She was scraping by in the class mostly because Professor Brown took pity on her. She told Lena over and over again that she had the talent but needed to feel the art. It was a criticism she only partially understood. Lena always felt her art, but figure drawing was indeed harder for her to connect with. She wasn't even sure why it was so difficult. Perhaps because a person was always moving, unlike a mountain that stayed steady and steadfast no matter what was happening around it. Capturing a facial expression was definitely harder than it was to find the divots and crags of a landscape.
This was another reason she wanted to sketch him. She knew him so well and knew she wouldn’t be able to turn off the part of her brain that was freaking out about seeing him naked. She would have to pay attention to his humanity and try to translate it onto the page. 
Nerves ate at her stomach. Not only with the idea of not being able to capture his lovely figure, but also… Nico was her friend. Sometimes a little more than that if either of them needed a date to an event, but they’d never taken it beyond their usual, comfortable banter that often flirted with the idea of more. It was one of the things that made moving on from him so hard. He never made solid moves, but he never cut it off, either. He flashed his dimples and made her weak in the knees, but never went so far as to kiss her or really ask her on a date. 
Seeing him naked without being in a relationship felt like a step too far. At the same time, it felt like the only option. There wasn’t another man she’d be comfortable sketching, despite her bluff about Jes. 
Now she wished she hadn’t eaten. 
At the very least, she would have the barrier of her art and easel between them. Maybe this really would force her into feeling her art. It already felt like she was fighting through her anxiety, and he wasn’t even there yet.
When he came into the living room, Nico found the furniture rearranged. She’d shoved the coffee table out of the way and set two of the dining room chairs in its place. She was unpacking her supplies, leaning a large sketching pad on her easel and lining several graphite pencils up on the side table, along with a sharpener. 
“No paints?” he asked. 
She jumped, and her heart did a little skid to the side. “These pieces are all supposed to be done in one color. I feel most comfortable with graphite, so I’m doing that instead of colored pencils,” she rambled before managing to cut herself off.
Turning to look at him, she breathed, “good heavens, you look hot,” before she could stop herself. She knew he would be, but she still felt like she’d just been socked in the stomach.
It was a bit selfish of her to request this particular outfit. She always liked the way his suit pants fit, and seeing his toned chest rising above the clean, sharp line of his black belt made her fingers itch to hold a pencil. His muscles were sculpted for practical use - not too bulky, but not too lean. Chiseled enough to show ridges and valleys, but not so much that he looked like a hulked out action hero. 
He was desire personified. He was… he was an Adonis.
A cheeky smile lit his face, “good to know.” 
She made herself laugh to break the tension. 
“Where do you want me?” he asked, waggling his eyebrows. It felt too intimate, too much like something he fantasized about if he didn’t force himself to joke about it. 
A triumphant smile lit her face. This she could do. She was used to directing models into shapes where the light would highlight the most interesting part of their features. She asked him to stand in the middle of the room and turned him a few times, trying to get the lighting right. 
Nico tried not to flex or stand too stiffly when her hands were grasping his forearms to turn him this way and that. She stepped back to study him, then came forward to begin the process again.
Eventually, she shoved the couch out of the way and asked him to lean against the wall.
He stayed rigidly in the position she left him in as she brought another lamp into the room, angling the shade to get the shadows she was looking for. 
“Just lean against the wall with your hands in your pockets.” 
He did, and laughter burst out of her chest, “you can relax.” 
“I don’t know what to do,” he admitted, looking up without changing his posture. He felt stiff and on display. In his mind, this was going to be much sexier than the reality was turning out to be. He didn’t know what to do with his hands or his eyes. Or his mouth. Was he supposed to be doing something with his mouth? Should he be smiling? 
“Just stand like you would if you were waiting for something.” 
"What am I waiting for?" 
“Like you’re waiting for…me?”
“Where?” 
“I don’t know, Nico,” she caught the exasperation in her voice and cut it off. He wasn’t a professional model. He wasn’t used to coming up with scenarios on the fly like this. “I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head, “like you’re waiting for me to…” she trailed off. “It doesn’t really matter why.”
If it was up to him, he’d be waiting to take her to bed. She was wearing the same pink shirt she’d worn that day he walked in on her in the kitchen, and it brought up vivid memories of her wearing it without a bra. He wondered if she was wearing the matching underwear. The thought made him blush and cast his eyes down. 
His hair flopped over one of his eyes in that cartoon prince way it always did.
“Stay there,” she practically yelled, her hands itching to capture the angles of his face. 
The sound of her pencil brushing her paper took over his thoughts, and he tried not to twitch as his hair tickled his eyelid. 
“Can you relax your shoulders?” she asked. 
He rolled his shoulders back and did his best to relax, “better?” 
“Don’t move,” she chastised. 
He smiled a little before trying to settle his face back into the expression he had before. 
Just as his neck was beginning to ache, she ripped the page from her pad and asked him to sit down. 
He looked at her for direction and smiled at her intensity. He wondered if she always looked at people like this when she was drawing them. He was a little disappointed that in the six years he'd known her, this was the first time this kind of intensity was being turned on him.
“Just get comfortable.” 
Nico extended one leg and slouched into the chair, letting the other knee fall to the side so his legs were spread.
“Can you,” Lena stopped herself mid request, biting her lip. In her mind, she was forming an art story of him slowly undressing. She wondered if this was just her lust talking and if that was okay.
“Can I?” 
She decided she didn't care if it was her lust driving. It would be a good, easy to follow series.
Her cheeks were aflame, glowing bright in the lamp light. “Can you undo your pants?” 
His eyes widened momentarily, and she saw his Adams apple bob in his throat.
Forcing his fingers into action, he worked at the button and zipper, well aware of her watching his movements. 
“I want to sketch your hands,” she said, voice reverent.
Nico stilled immediately and looked at her, holding his zipper pull. That wasn’t a reaction he’d expected.
“Oh, God,” she covered her face, pencil still in her fingers so the point angled down at her wrist. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.” 
He couldn’t stop the cocky grin that spread over his face. This was more like what he’d imagined posing for her would be like. “You can sketch my hands anytime you want, hase,” he said, adding on the pet name before he thought better of it.
Her blush got brighter. She hated when he called her that. Bunny. It was a term of endearment that Nina assured her was well known and used by friends and lovers alike, but it brought up all sorts of wishing on her part that they were the latter. 
“Where do you want my hands?” he asked because he knew it would make her more flustered. 
She had to clear her throat and duck behind her easel. “Wherever,” she squeaked out, trying to calm her racing heart. 
Laughing, he thought about photos of underwear models and tried to get his body into a position like that. He hooked his right thumb into his waistband, exposing more of his red boxer briefs. The other hand fell off to the side, relaxed. 
Peeking around her easel, Lena lost her breath. She had never seen him so sexy. He radiated confidence and comfort with his body — something she never quite managed to feel about herself. 
This was going to be impossible.
“Look at me.” She really didn’t want him to look at her. She felt like she might set fire to her sketch pad if he did, but it would make the most impactful portrait.
Nico’s eyes met hers, and her stomach jolted. The teasing, flirtatious energy radiating from him hit her in waves. The rumble of desire she'd been feeling in her low belly purred to a higher gear, and she had to consciously stop herself from clenching her thighs together. Flirty and intense, his eyes were focused on her with purpose. Wanting, she realized with a jolt. That’s what this expression was. The kind of wanting where you want the person you’re looking at to know you want them. 
She’d imagined getting this look of open desire from him so many times that having it turned on her now nearly knocked the breath out of her. 
Forcing her hands into action, she’d never been happier to find muscle memory taking over – drawing the basic shape of his body when her mind was still running around screaming about how outrageously, unfairly attractive he was.  
Eventually, her creative mind took over, and she relaxed into the art, strokes lengthening and easing. 
When it came time to detail, she started with his face, trying to capture his relaxed, intense stare. In any other circumstance, she was certain her panties would catch fire or dissolve right off her body if he gave her this look. In all the years she’d known him, she’d never seen this expression. He would never be so forward with her in real life. 
Despite her heart beating so hard she felt it in her throat and her wrists, her pencil stayed steady. 
The exercise wasn't lost on her. Even the first drawing felt different. This looked different from her usual work, too - more real in a way she couldn’t really describe. Almost as if he might just walk off the page and kiss the viewer. 
Wanting to get this expression just right, she paused to take a photo so she could reference it later. 
“Can we turn on some music?” he asked after a minute or two. 
“Sure. What do you want?” 
“Whatever, just something.” 
Flipping on the TV, she pulled up his music subscription service and selected a slow playlist. Something he wouldn’t be tempted to bop his head to before going back to her easel to finish.
Pushing aside the longing to be on the receiving end of this wanting in a situation where he wasn’t acting, she continued on. 
He stayed in this position the longest. He found it the most comfortable, and apparently, the way he was watching her, the concentration in her mouth, and the way it narrowed her eyes just slightly was fine for her. It was a relief to not have to school the wanting off of his face for once.
After getting to a place where she felt like she could pick back up in a day or two, she had him remove his pants and sit backward. 
Almost immediately, he leaned back, one hand gripping the chair for balance while the other ran into his hair. She yelped at him to still. 
He went rigid. The position forced him to engage his core, and the arm lifted to push back his hair started to cramp from halting mid-movement. 
This sketch ended up being her favorite, though she knew people would like the one before better. This one was really a study of his body — how his muscles flexed and bulged. She even somehow managed to capture the feeling of movement in his bicep. She’d only been able to do that with trees before. Plus, the whole thing was such a Nico gesture, it felt more like him, too. 
A page ripped from her sketch pad, and finally, letting his arm down and shaking it out, he watched her settle it, face down, onto the pile, 
“Okay,” she came out from behind her easel, her hands clasped in front of her, “I’m gonna go… get some water if you want to undress and sit back like this?” 
He nodded, feeling his cheeks heat to match hers. This was all fun, games and teasing until he had to be naked in front of her. And she wouldn’t even be touching him. She’d be standing three feet away, looking at him the way she looked at one of her paintings. 
He’d daydreamed about being on the receiving end of that intense gaze so many times, but getting it in this situation felt like a poor consolation prize. 
He was on his own here, with no one to share the vulnerability of being naked with. 
“Do you need anything?” she asked from the kitchen as he was stripping off his boxers.
“Water?” he asked, setting them on top of his folded pants. 
Walking back into the living room, two bottles in her hand, Lena stopped short. 
She had seen many nude models and taught herself to get over the shock quickly. Training her mind to see the person as a sculpture, not a living being, she focused on the beauty of the human body and not the person living in it. And Nico’s body was beautiful. Smooth golden skin, dotted with freckles and moles, that stretched over living, moving muscles. 
Except, he wasn’t a marble statue. He was a living, breathing, beautiful man, and she knew him. She knew how he acted and what he loved, and she knew how much she loved him. And how much it meant to her that he was willing to put himself in such an uncomfortable position for her. She loved him so much, her heart ached with it. How could she possibly translate that into a two dimensional piece of art? 
She knew from experience how awkward it was to be a model, let alone a nude model, and that was with people she barely knew. For Nico to be naked in front of her, willing to let her sketch his strong legs and expressive eyes was something totally different. Now, besides seeing his body, which really was so beautiful, it nearly made her lose her breath. She could also see the anxiety in the set of his thigh and the curve of his spine. 
Quite suddenly, gratitude and love for him swelled within her chest in a way she had never experienced. It felt hard to breathe. 
A small noise escaped her throat.
Looking over his shoulder, Nico asked, “okay?” 
She nodded. Her feet finally moved, and she handed him the water. “You’re so beautiful, Nico,” she said, that reverent tone back in her voice as her eyes wandered down his body.
He felt a blush creep down his neck. “I don’t…” he cleared his throat, “I mean, you’re…” 
His brain wasn’t working right. She was watching him with this wonderment in her face, like she’d just found the answer to the universe. He wanted to tell her she was the beautiful one, not him, but he couldn’t seem to find the right words when she was looking at him like that.
“Thanks,” he finally managed to say. "What do you want me to do?” 
Now that they were here, she had no idea. She just wanted to watch him for the rest of the night.
The embarrassment she’d expected never came. 
She adjusted her easel, so she was looking at him, just off to the side. She could see three-quarters of his face, but his thick thigh hid his penis from her view. “Just try to get comfortable,” she said. 
Her voice was so kind and gentle that it relaxed Nico a little, but mostly, he still felt coiled tight and out of sync. “I don’t know that I can,” he said truthfully. 
“That’s fine. I know I’m asking you to be comfortable in a really awkward situation. If you feel like you can’t look at me, that’s fine.” 
The truth was that he always wanted to look at her, but seeing her this way, looking at him with holiness in her face, made him ache for her in a way he’d never felt with anyone else.  It felt nothing like any of the dreams or daydreams he’d had that involved him being naked in her presence before. 
She started with his legs first, so he didn’t have to find a way to position his head right then. “Can you flex your right thigh?” she asked. 
He did, and she giggled. He glanced over to find her in the same spot, shaking her head, “sorry, the other thigh? Your left. My right.” 
Nico tried his best and heard a breath rush from her. 
“Good grief, your legs are so sexy,” Lena said before she could stop herself.
His breath lodged in his chest. “My legs?” he repeated, his voice one step off from croaking. Had she really just said that?
“Yes,” she said, her tone serious, pencil still working. “Men’s legs are severely underrated.”
When he glanced at her, he found her concentrating again, but her mouth was set in a new expression, lips soft and parted slightly, like she was waiting to be kissed. At this point, it was nothing short of torture.
Pulling his eyes from her, he folded his arms around the chair back and set his chin on his hands. He watched the album cover bouncing around the TV screen. Mens legs were underrated. How many men did she think about like that? 
“That’s really nice, Nico, if you can just stay like that.” 
Cookie wandered in then and flopped onto the carpet previously covered by the coffee table. He watched Nico with slow blinking eyes, and he tried not to feel so observed. 
After four more songs of listening to her pencil and eraser working, she said, “Okay.”
He sat up. 
“Wait! I have to take a picture.” 
He winced, feeling the muscles in his back knot up. “Those aren’t getting turned in, are they?” 
“Nope, they’re just for me,” she winked.
His eyes widened, and she laughed.
“No, they’re for reference so I can finish the drawings. I’ll delete them later.”  
Forcing a laugh, Nico couldn’t quite decide which was worse - her taking the pictures or telling him she'd delete them so casually. 
“Okay, so for the last two sketches, I was thinking one with you standing, and one with you supine.” 
“Supine?” he repeated. He’d never even heard that word before.  
“Laying on your back.”
Well fuck. Of all the times he imagined himself on his back with her, this was just another one that would crush the daydreams he clung to on long, lonely nights. Pushing that thought away, he asked, “what’s first?”
“Whatever’s easiest for you.”
“Standing full frontal?” he asked. 
“I don’t know,” she said truthfully. “None of my figure drawings have included genitals. I could cut you off at the pelvis or sketch from behind. Which would you prefer?” 
He shrugged, feeling too spent to make a decision, especially one like this. Then, quite suddenly, he realized: If he was standing in front of her, he’d have to watch her looking at his dick the whole time. “Behind,” he blurted, too quick, too loud. 
After following her instruction, he found himself standing, facing the large window, where the curtains were mercifully drawn. One of his feet was up on a rung of the coffee table, forcing him to keep balance with the other. 
“I think you need to hold something,” she said, standing and walking out of the room. 
Upon coming back, she handed him the chain he wore most of the time. He’d left it on his bathroom counter, unsure if she wanted him to wear it. The fact that she seemed to know where he’d left it without asking wasn’t lost on him. He wondered if she assumed that’s where he’d left it or if she’d somehow seen him put it there. 
“You can fiddle with that,” she said.
It was cool and solid in his hands, and he allowed it to slip through his fingers, feeling the ridges and links of the metal, before his fingers slid over the cross. His breathing centered, and he felt some anxiety unknot between his shoulder blades. 
After a quick outline, she filled in some details that wouldn’t come through in a photo and asked him to lie down. She knew he was losing steam. It was a lot to ask to pose for six different portraits. Not only did it require a certain amount of stillness on his part, but it was also a night full of being watched. She could fill in the details later. 
“Let me get you a blanket to lay on,” she said. 
He breathed a sigh of relief. At least he wouldn’t have to lay buck naked on the floor. 
She fetched the cozy blanket she kept on her bed. It was soft and comforting and smelled like her, like the  sweet, citrusy scent of her perfume. It was all at once comforting and disconcerting. He had so many memories with this scent. There was even a time his dick would twitch every time he smelled it. It was around too much, now, for that reaction, but it still called up a sharp longing in his gut.  
Wrapping it around himself,  he sat on the floor, then lay down. 
She fetched him a pillow, and once he was comfortable, began directing. “Can you bend your knee closest to me?”
He was slow to move but did it anyway. 
Sensing his fatigue, she told him, “I know, we’re nearly done.”
He sighed, relieved he didn’t have to ask. 
“I was hoping this one would be sort of satisfied.” she said, settling herself onto the floor facing him, her easel collapsed to be shorter. 
He arched one of his eyebrows.
“I don’t know,” she answered, “I mean like, content, I guess.” 
“I don’t think I can do that right now,” he said, hearing a wearied annoyance come into his voice. He was too tired to school it back. He was feeling spent up. Too much vulnerability with too little reciprocation. 
Lena bit her lip. “Can I do anything to make it better?” 
A sigh shifted his chest into a new position, “I just feel really…” he wasn’t sure what the words he needed were. 
She waited patiently for him to finish. He liked that she never rushed his thinking. 
Finally, he threw the other half of the blanket over his lap and sat up to face her. “I feel like I’m all exposed.” 
She nodded. 
“And you’re not.” 
She hmm’d and pulled her bottom lip into her mouth, thinking. It was such a Lena gesture that it made him smile. 
“Do you want me to get undressed?” she asked, then immediately regretted it. It seemed like the reciprocal thing to offer, but upon hearing the words out loud, she realized exactly how much she didn’t want to do it. Then they both would be anxious and awkward, and she wouldn’t be able to concentrate on her art, and that would be a loose loose for everyone.
“No.” Yes, of course he did. But if that were to happen, he wanted to earn it. He didn’t want it to be because he couldn’t sit through modeling for some portraits. Plus, then he would be completely distracted by her. 
She scooted a little closer to him, questioning in her eyes.
“I feel,” he hesitated, searching for the right thing to say. A long pause passed where she didn’t get fidgety or impatient, just waited for him to continue. The phrasing came in SwissGerman first, or course, and then he had to figure out how to best say it in English. “I feel like I’m doing this for nothing.”
“For nothing?” she repeated, a mildly panicked look crossing her face.
“I’m doing it for you, but for what? So you do well on your project?” He was happy to help, but it felt like too much. Too much given without any reciprocation. Perhaps his fatigue was talking. 
Her mouth pursed, “I can see where you’re coming from, but it’s a little more than a grade at this point. With you, I've finally been able to sketch the body the way I've been trying to for so long. And the fact that you’re willing to do something so uncomfortable, so vulnerable for me makes me just…I don’t even know how to say it.” She wanted to tell him that it made her love him. She’d told him she loved him before. She’d told him that many times: “love you, see you later,” but this felt different, deeper and truer somehow, and she wasn’t sure she was willing to admit those feelings. 
Instead, she asked, “do you want to see the sketches so far?” feeling they may be the best explanation she had. 
He perked up. She rarely showed anyone her art until it had been worked on more. A rough sketch was something she held close to her chest, wanting to keep it private until she deemed it good enough to display. He nodded, and Lena stood to retrieve them. 
Given a moment to think, he assessed his body, finding what was lacking with a quick scan. “I think I need to eat,” he said. 
His metabolism was so high, spiked higher by so much physical exercise all the time that hunger often came on swiftly, affecting his mood more than he’d like to admit. His teammates teased him to the point that he always had a snack with him. How long had they been at this drawing thing? He hadn’t eaten enough to begin with, and now they were however many hours in, and he was hungry. 
That would also explain it. She hadn’t been joking when she told him not to get hangry on her. Setting the sketches in front of him, she went to grab the sushi from the fridge.
The drawings were farther along than he expected. She worked faster than he knew. 
It was a strange thing to see himself in her delicate, penciled outlines.
Flipping over to the second sketch, he blinked a few times. He was himself, but not. The man on this paper was confident, relaxed, and flirtatious in a way he always wanted to be, especially with Lena.
“Is this how you see me?” he asked when she came back into the room.
“That’s how you are, Nico.” 
It was like looking in a weird, funhouse mirror. Was this how she saw him all the time? 
The third sketch was all in the details: the peek of the tattoo on his bicep, the flex of his abs, and the swell in his boxers. 
He flipped to the first nude sketch. She perfectly captured how he felt. Anxious, unsure, and alone. It even looked like he was bouncing his leg. Yet, the portrait didn’t seem to feel anxious. It somehow felt like acceptance. She wasn’t fighting against his feelings to make them prettier, never asking him to feel anything different. She took him as he was and translated him onto a page in a way he’d never seen or expected to see. 
How could he possibly be these two things just an hour apart? 
“It’s weird to see your own facets turned back on you, isn’t it? I felt that way when I had to sit for class portraits.” They had all taken turns modeling for their classmates so they could understand better the perspective of the model, and it had been strange to see sixteen different versions of herself at the end of the class - each of them skewed a little based on the artist. 
In the last drawing, he looked more relaxed. He was so glad when she’d handed him his cross to hold. Not only was it something comforting and familiar, but she’d also given him something to do with his hands, which felt important. 
This was the drawing that most made him look like a hockey player, he thought. He could clearly see how his butt and thighs were thicker than the rest of him. He’d long ago gotten used to the size of his legs, but it was still strange to see the disproportion of them in comparison with the rest of his body laid bare so thoroughly. 
She dipped her head to capture his line of vision, “I meant what I said before, Nico,” she said, handing him the to-go container. “You really are beautiful.” She flipped back to him tense and unsure. “Even here. Maybe even most here.”
His eyes shot to hers. 
“This,” she tapped the drawn version of him on the back, “represents a huge sacrifice you're making for me. Putting yourself in a very uncomfortable position to help me get better at my art. To help me really understand the human form for the first time. I look at this, and I see how much you care for me.”
When he’d finished with the rest of the sushi, feeling sated and comfortable, he looked at her. She’d placed her sketch pad on the floor and put the last drawing on top of it. Hunched over, she was filling in detail.
He always appreciated this about Lena, that if he needed some time to himself, she would find a way to keep herself busy. He didn’t feel like he had to entertain her all the time, like he did with a lot of the women in his life. It was a refreshing change of pace. 
He watched her work for a while, fascinated with the way she braced her hand with just the knuckle of her pinky finger so she wouldn’t smudge the charcoal already on the page. 
Clearing his throat, he set the empty container to the side. 
Looking up, Lena could see how much better he felt. His shoulders were more relaxed, and his hands were loose in his lap. 
“Do you want to keep going?” she asked, moving the drawing back to the pile. 
He nodded. 
“We can pick up again on Sunday if you’d rather.”
He wasn’t sure he could convince himself into doing this again. “No, I feel better,” which was a partial truth, “let's finish now.” 
She scooted back to her easel. When she got settled and looked around it, she found he had changed positions. Still on his back, his other knee was slightly bent, the blanket draped around his far hip to cover himself. His hand was up, resting under his head, showing off the smooth underside of his bicep and the tattoo of his families zodiac signs. 
“Is this okay?” he asked. 
"Yeah. Could you adjust the blanket?” she asked. “So it’s not so folded?”  
He nodded and pulled himself into a half crunch to see and adjust the fabric. His abs contracted, and Lena looked at the ceiling before she could be overwhelmed with attraction. 
“Like this?” he asked. 
When she looked again, it was better, but still looked too placed, not like it’d been hastily thrown over him. 
Her lips pressed together, an he sighed, knowing what that meant. “Can you just adjust it?” 
“You’re sure you’re okay with that?”
Pulling in a fortifying breath, he nodded. 
As she crawled over to him, Nico felt his heartbeat quicken. 
Her hands softly gathered the blanket, pulling out the folds. If he were wearing something underneath, she’d just toss it up and let it fall, but she couldn’t do that.  
Her fingers brushed the inside of his thigh as she tucked more of it between his legs, and the muscle fluttered all the way up to his groin. Biting his cheek, he stifled the groan of frustration that crawled up his throat. 
“Sorry,” she said, holding her hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry.” 
He shook his head, eyes still closed. Maybe he hadn’t been as successful as he thought. If he looked at her now, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop the semi he was sporting from popping into a full boner and he just couldn't take that embarrassment. “it’s okay. Just, no more.”
Nodding, she scooted back to her easel. 
Keeping his eyes closed, Nico thought about swimming in the cold, glacial lake near home until his body relaxed. 
“Nico,” Lena asked, her hand on his shoulder. 
His eyes fluttered open. 
Above him, her expression was soft and full of that same wonderment from before. “I’m done if you want to get dressed.” 
He nodded, and she left the room. 
Before going to join her in the kitchen, he pulled his boxers and trousers back on. 
“Sorry I fell asleep,” he said, rubbing a hand over his face. 
“Nothing to be sorry for. I’m glad you felt comfortable.” 
He hugged her then, bringing her body closer to his. He'd been thinking about it for too long. 
“Thank you for doing this for me,” she said, voice intimate, dim and quiet. 
“You know I'd do anything for you,” he said. 
Did she know that? She figured she did. “Still, I know it wasn’t easy, so thank you.” 
Nico stilled when she tucked her face into his neck. She’d done this before when he’d comforted her after a breakup. Then, he’d wanted to show her he could be the better man for her, but he’d been unwilling to cross that line. He still was. Maybe Jack and Luca were right. Maybe he did just need to grow a pair and ask her out. But what if she didn’t want him and didn’t want to deal with the repercussions of that discussion and wanted to move out? He would feel horrible. She’d have to find a place that would let her keep Cookie or take him back to her parents.
“Are you okay?” she asked, running her hands over his back. His skin was warm and surprisingly soft. Along with the scent of his soap and the mild undertone of sweat, there was a faintly cedar-y smell clinging to his skin. She’d never been able to tell where it came from. It was too faint to be cologne. 
His muscles trembled. “Yeah,” he said into her hair, trying to calm his racing heart. 
Her phone trilled from her back pocket. Lena was the only person he knew who didn’t keep her phone on vibrate.
She pulled back so she could look at it.  
Nico reluctantly let his hands fall to his sides. “Your mom?” he asked. It seemed she was the only one who ever really called Lena. At least when he was around. 
“No, it’s Milo,” she said, silencing the ringer and setting the phone face down on the counter. “He’s probably drunk and wants to get laid.” 
Nico’s heart began to race with worry, jealousy, and fear. “Does he do that a lot?” Thank god his voice didn’t squeak over the words.
“Once a month or so, I guess.” 
He knew he shouldn’t ask this question. He knew it was none of his business, but he was tired and emotionally empty, and his filter was thinner than usual because of it. “Do you take him up on it?” 
Her eyebrows raised, a sarcastic look taking over her pretty features, “are you serious, Nico? Of course not. He’s just drunk dialing through his contacts list.” 
“I always hated that guy. He’s such a tool.” 
Hearing that phrase come out of Nico’s mouth, in his strong accent, made her laugh out loud. “What?” 
“That’s not the right word?” he asked. “Like he’s selfish and just does things to be cool?” 
“It’s the right word,” she confirmed, this teasing smile on her lips that would liquify his bones if he let it. “I know you never liked him. I just didn’t realize you felt so…strongly about it.” 
His nose scrunched as he blew out a frustrated breath. “He wasn’t good enough for you.”
“Well, he couldn’t measure up anyway.” 
“Measure up to what?” 
“To this guy I’ve liked for a really long time,” she said, not quite brave enough to spit out the truth.
“So why don’t you date him?” Nico asked instead of demanding to know who this man was. 
“I can’t ever tell if he’s into me.” 
“He’d be a fool to not be into you.”
“Would he?” she asked, looking into his face, wondering what he meant by that.
“Yeah. You’re kind and fun and smart,” he said. 
Part of her swooned when he didn’t lead off with the fact that she was pretty. The other part of her was a little disappointed he didn’t seem to notice. 
“Any man would be lucky to have you,” he added on quietly as his eyes dropped to his feet. He couldn’t possibly look at her while telling her another man would be lucky to have her. It would happen one day, he knew, but he kind of hoped he’d somehow be out of the picture when it did. 
Lena studied him as he looked at his bare feet. 
His curiosity got the better of him, “who is this guy anyway?” 
Well, shit. She’d really talked herself into a corner this time. What was she supposed to say now? 
“Do I know him?” 
She nodded. 
“Does he play?” he asked hesitantly. 
She nodded again.
“I thought…” The knowledge sliced through him: if it wasn’t about hockey, it was about him. “I thought you didn’t like hockey players,” he said, fighting against the ache in his chest. 
Her eyebrows knitted together in confusion. “What gave you that idea?” 
“I overheard you talking to Jessica at the rink once about how you wouldn’t date me because I was a hockey player.” 
“You’re sure I was talking about you?” 
“You said ‘I don’t date hockey players,’ and then Jessica asked, ‘what about Nico?’” 
Understanding sparked her memory. “Did you stick around to hear my answer?” She hadn’t even known he was listening in on that conversation. She’d been sitting on the refreshments counter while Jessica baked the soft pretzels. He must have been around the corner, heading into the locker room.
“You said ‘it doesn’t matter.’ I couldn’t listen anymore, so I walked away.” 
A small smile lit up her face. “If you had stayed, you would have heard me say, ‘it doesn’t matter, Nico’s not like the other guys. He’s sweet and respectful.’” 
“Oh,” he said because he didn’t know what else to say.  “I thought you didn’t date hockey players,” he said again, lamely. 
“I don’t. I mean, not the average ones,” she added on when his expression fell. “I told people that because they’d wonder why I was around the team all the time, but not shacking up with any of them. Those boys I grew up with were all such dogs, but you never made me feel less than for being a woman or like I needed to put out to be accepted.” 
His nose wrinkled. 
“See, that?” she asked, noting his disgust. “That’s why I like you, Nico. You’re sweet and kind and so respectful of women.” 
“Why wouldn’t I be?” 
“You see it in locker rooms all the time. I’m sure you see it in yours currently.” 
The conversation paused as he thought. 
“You’re different than other players,” she said. “Jessica was asking me that because she knew you’re a hockey player that I liked.”
“You liked me?” he asked, his mind running in circles trying to process all the information coming at him. 
“Yeah, Nico,” she said. Well, she was already here, she may as well spill the whole pot. “I still do.” 
Half of his mouth lifted just enough to dimple his cheek.
“Ugh, don’t flash your dimples at me! I can barely keep my hands to myself as it is,” she said, shoving his shoulder.
That was new. “What if I don’t want you to keep your hands to yourself?” 
Her breath hitched in her throat. “Don’t tease Nico. It’s rude.” 
“Who said anything about teasing?” 
“I —” she was having a hard time articulating her words, “but you —” 
He patiently waited for her to finish, attempting to school the grin off his face. 
“But you don’t even like me like that,” she finished, lamely.
He couldn’t help it, laughter burst out of his chest, “what?” 
“You’ve never made a move,” she said, feeling outrageously embarrassed. It was one thing to admit her feelings, but then to have them thrown back in her face was something she just couldn’t handle. 
“You know what Jack tells me every time he sees us together?” 
She was so taken off guard by the question that it jolted Lena out of her spiraling thoughts. “What?” 
“He tells me to make it happen.” 
Her eyebrows shot up. 
“All the guys know I’m in love with you.”
Her breathing hitched, and she gripped the counter behind her to keep from falling over.
“In fact, everyone knows I’m in love with you. Nina says I look so lovesick no one can miss it.” He took a step in so they were nearly chest to chest. “But somehow, you don’t ever see it,” he added quietly. 
He was so close, she was certain he could hear her heart hammering. Her mind was still caught on, ‘all the guys know I’m in love with you.’ It was like she couldn’t process the words. “You’re in love with me?” she asked. 
A deep, frustrated sound, like a groan, filtered up his throat. The thought of pulling that sound out of him in any other circumstance made her knees feel weak. It sent heat racing between her thighs.
“I’ve been in love with you since I left Halifax,” he said, relief he didn’t have to keep anything under wraps flooding through him. “That’s why I broke up with Viv when I left. I couldn’t stop thinking about you, and it wasn’t fair to her or to me.” 
Her wide eyes snapped to his, and Nico took a steadying breath. She really hadn’t known. All this time, he thought she must have, but held to her principles enough to turn away from it. 
“I’ve been in love with you since you left Halifax, too, Nico.” 
It was his turn for his breathing to hitch. “What?”
“I thought you didn’t like me like that.”
How was this possible? Nico felt like his knees were slowly turning to jelly. “How could you think that?” he croaked. 
“You never made a move,” she repeated. 
“You said you don’t date hockey players,” he defended. 
Hands fluttering up to cover her face, Lena shook her head. “I can’t believe this,” she said, a small laugh escaping. 
Reaching up, Nico gently encircled her wrists and pulled her hands away. She let them fall by her sides.
His heart was galloping in his chest. “Can I kiss you?” he asked, surprised to find his voice quieter than he meant it to be.
Lena nodded, a feeling as though she were about to jump out of a plane surging through her body. Something grand and beautiful waited for her if she could just put her faith in the parachute and step into the unknown. Well, partially unknown. She knew Nico, and she wasn’t afraid.
One of his hands drifted up to her face. Cupping her jaw, he stroked her cheek with his thumb. “You’re so beautiful, Lena,” he said, glad to find his voice had evened out. 
For the first time, she recognized that look he was always giving her. That wide open, soft gaze. Love, she realized with a shock of understanding. It was love. It had been love this whole time. She really had been blind. 
Her eyes darted away as her cheeks flushed pink. “Thank you.” She wouldn’t lie, hearing it eased some of the anxiety in her chest.
He waited for her eyes to come back to his before leaning down. Heart hammering with six years of anticipation, their lips finally met.
When her head tipped slightly to the side and her mouth opened to him, a shock raced down his spine while a sigh filtered up his throat. The kiss was better than any fantasy his mind had concocted through the years.
His tongue tentatively slipped into her mouth, and Lena felt a flash flood of right, this is right, this is the most right thing that’s ever been right in my life, sweep through her. 
Her hands fluttered up to his shoulders, and she felt his, heavy on her waist, squeeze when her tongue slipped past his lips.
God, Nico was in paradise. This was the softest, most heavenly, love-filled kiss he’d ever experienced. How did people even find words for this? Sudden understanding sparked in the back of his mind. This was why people wrote sonnets and songs and books. He wanted to drown in this feeling.
Eager to see his face again, she eased back.
“This is okay?” he asked, eyes snapping to hers, worried she was having regrets.
Nodding, she leaned forward and slid her mouth over his. 
This kiss was slower, more passionate. When her teeth grazed his bottom lip, Nico felt electricity zing through him. 
His fingers ran into her hair to cradle the back of her head. 
There was no stopping the moan that filtered up her throat when he sucked on her tongue gently. 
Fuck, he loved that noise more than anything he’d ever heard. He wanted to hear it again, and again and again in every possible position and every possible circumstance.
All at once, the kiss was electric, the initial softness giving way to the chemistry and sexual tension that had been brewing between them for more than half a decade. Lena had never felt anything like it. It was exhilarating and somehow grounding in a way she’d never experienced, as if they were rooted together by their passion.
She wanted more of him. Her hands dove into his hair, noting the groan he let out when she pulled it lightly. 
Nico lifted her onto the counter. He wanted her closer than their standing position allowed. She wrapped her legs around his waist. It was exactly what he’d been hoping for.
He broke away and trailed his mouth to her jaw, eager to taste her skin.
“Nico,” her voice was a breathy little moan. 
He was a fool for not telling her sooner. God, he was such a fool. 
Her hand found his jaw and pulled his mouth back to hers with a simple, “more,” that nearly drove him out of his mind with the need to obey. 
Their teeth clicked, and she gigged. 
He loved this, too - getting her in all the ways, even the awkward ones. A laugh fell into her mouth, and it brought him back to himself. He wanted to savor this. There was no need to rush. She wasn’t going anywhere. 
Nico felt himself pout when she proved him wrong, and her lips broke from his. She stripped off her shirt, and before he could get his eyes on her, he felt her mouth connect to that soft spot under his jaw. How did she know?
“Lena,” he breathed. Her hands slid down his front, and the shock of her touch sent his skin to trembling. “Oh my God, Lena.”
She’d always loved the way he said her name, but this was something else. This was a song she would never get tired of, one she wanted to listen to again, and again, and again. 
Her mouth explored his throat, sucking his pulse point. His dedication to go slow dissolved a little with every brush of her tongue, every graze of her nose ring across his skin. 
His hands were suddenly everywhere. All over her back, cupping her butt to pull her to the edge of the counter so their hips could touch. 
Feeling the rigid length of him pressing between her legs turned Lena feral. She’d done this to him. She was doing this to him. Tightening her legs around him, she wanted to do so much more to him. 
Their hips ground together as his hands slipped to unhook her bra. “Okay?” 
“Yeah.” 
He fumbled with the clasps briefly before they gave way. 
Taking the garment at the center gore, she pulled it away from her body. A brief moment of chaos ensued as their arms tangled in the effort to get it away from her. Finally, she flung it over his shoulder and giggled when the metal bits clinked against the tile floor. 
Laughter split his face into the adorable, dimpled smile she loved so much before his gaze turned back to her. Even as the corners of his mouth remained turned up, his jaw slackened as his eyes blew wide. 
Dreams and reality crashed into each other, and Nico felt his breath rush from his lungs. He’d never seen anything so beautiful in his life. 
“Hase,” he said, because he couldn’t think of anything else to say. It was a bit of a cutesy pet name, but his brain was too busy trying to soak in every detail of her he’d been so starved for to think of a new one. 
He murmured something under his breath in German, and Lena felt heat race to her core. She slid her hands into his hair in an attempt to pull him into a kiss, but he resisted, eyes still glued to her chest. 
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he breathed, voice husky. 
“Thank you,” she said, feeling a blush overtake her cheeks. 
He reached out, then paused, hands stopped in mid-air. “Can I?”
When his eyes flicked up to meet hers again, she lost her own breath. She was so used to seeing Nico’s expressive eyes wide with (what she knew now was) love, sparkling with mirth or drooped with disappointment. This…lust, different even from when he was posing with his pants undone, was new. Heat mixed with love and wonder. She’d never felt so desired. 
She nodded, finding her voice wasn’t where she left it. 
Nico was already throbbing against the zipper of his trousers, and cupping her breasts in his palms only made it worse. When she arched into his touch with a moan, it became damn near unbearable. 
Unable to wait any longer, he crashed his lips to hers as their hips surged together again. 
If he wasn’t careful, he was going to blow his load in his pants before he even got to feel her touch. Forcing himself to slow down, he concentrated on the weight of her breasts in his hands and the taste of her tongue in his mouth. 
She was the one who took it further, one of her hands slipping down his stomach to cup him over his fabric prison.
Now would be a horrible time to faint, he told himself, even as he felt his eyes rolling back and his hips pushing forward into her hand. He groaned against her lips. 
His mouth slid to her neck, and she shivered, feeling her nipples tighten more as his teeth scraped over her sensitive throat. 
He was hard and so hot, even through the fabric of his trousers. It suddenly wasn’t enough. Removing her other hand from his hair, she fumbled with the belt buckle. Finally managing to get it open, she asked, “this is okay?” 
“God, yes,” he moaned, hips restlessly moving against her hands. 
As she was tearing the zipper down, one of his hands slid toward the fastening of her own jeans. “Okay?” 
“Uh-hu.”
It was only after he flicked the button open and managed to pull the zipper that she realized she didn’t want to do this here. Not where, if she leaned back, her head would hit the cabinets, and not so close to where they prepared their food.
“Can we move to the couch?” she asked, breath in his ear.
Could they move to the couch? He would move them to the moon if she asked. 
Lightning fast, his hands were suddenly cradling her bum, hauling her off the counter so he could cary her to the living room. A surprised yelp escaped her at the sudden show of strength.
He had to wrench his eyes open so he wouldn’t dump them on the floor as she licked his jaw up to the lobe of his ear, which she nibbled gently. 
When they made it there, he tried to sit down still holding her, but only half managed it before he was falling the rest of the way. He didn’t mind her crashing on top of him. Feeling her chest pressed to his was a lifelong dream coming to fruition. 
She was moving so restlessly on top of him, hips grinding, it made him whimper. Her hands snaked between them again, this time to shove his pants down. 
They both pushed and tugged, and finally, he was free. 
She broke away to look at him, and he had a sudden, terrible worry she would be disappointed. He wasn’t the biggest guy, but he wasn’t too small — at least no one had told him so. 
“Oh, Nico,” Lena murmured, finally getting her hands on him. He was perfect. Thick and hard and searingly hot against her palm. 
“Lena,” he moaned, head tipping back against the couch cushions. Finally feeling her touch was incredible. Now really would be a terrible time to faint. 
She pulled her hand away briefly to spit into her palm, and he almost lost it, feeling like he could have come from the sight alone. 
As soon as she began to stroke him, he was done for. There was no coming back from this — though he couldn’t think of a reason why they would need to. 
His mouth dropped open, and his eyelids fluttered, attempting to keep looking into her face. The pleasure she was pulling out of him won out, and his eyes closed.
“Feels so good,” he groaned, his accent thickening as he spoke. He was going to lose his English next. 
It happened, and he started babbling in German. 
His voice was lower in his native tongue - it always had been. Lena felt her core flutter in anticipation. 
He repeated the same word several times like it was a question, but she didn't know what it meant. 
Nico opened his eyes and came back to himself enough to realize she didn't understand, and therefore couldn't do what he was begging her to. 
“Kiss,” he managed in English, unable to pull out the correct grammar. “Please, kiss.” 
Oh, that's what kush meant. In hindsight, it did sound a lot like kiss. 
When she caught his lips, Nico couldn't hold back a moan as her tongue licked into his mouth. He had imagined this so many times, but those fantasies didn't prepare him for the actual feel of her hands on him, or the sweet, warm taste of her mouth, as if she'd just eaten one of those cinnamon sweets she liked so much. 
Pleasure sparked and fizzed across his skin.
Jesus, this was better than anything he’d ever felt. Was this what six years of longing and anticipation did? Deciding it didn’t matter, he pushed the thought aside and let his whole mind be consumed by her soft hand, her incredible tongue, and the knowledge that this was actually happening. This was happening for real. He wasn’t going to jolt awake in a few minutes with a boner so hard it hurt. 
“Lena,” he groaned into her mouth. 
She pulled away just enough to whisper against his lips, “what do you need?” 
Everything. He needed everything. “You,” he said instead. 
“I’m here,” she said, pulling at his length with a little more fervor. 
His hips pumped up into her hand, desperate for release. 
“Lena, I’m…” he couldn’t even get the words out before he was exploding. 
She moaned along with him, drinking in the pleasure that washed over his face - his fluttering lashes and panting mouth. 
Closing his eyes, Nico tried to compose himself. The sight of his release splattered over her breasts might actually make him faint. 
She kept going with slower, gentler strokes until he winced, then gently pulled her hand away. 
“Fuck,” he groaned, voice deep and satisfied.  
She giggled. 
God, he couldn’t even move. Her mouth was back at his neck, and he breathed out a curse in German. 
“Is that good or bad?” she asked into his skin. 
“So good.” He needed to teach her so he wouldn’t have to explain. “Wanna make you feel good, too,” he said instead of launching into a lesson in German swearing.  
Lifting her mouth from his neck, she looked down at him. 
God, he was the most beautiful thing she’d ever seen. “You’re so handsome, Nico,” she whispered, tracing a thumb over one of his bushy eyebrows. 
He flushed. 
“I’ve thought about what you look like when you’re coming so many times,” she said, tracing over his cheekbone this time. 
“You have?” he squeaked. 
She nodded. “And it was so beautiful.” 
“I have too,” he admitted, slowly sliding his hand up her thigh. “Can I see it?”
Biting her lip, she nodded. 
Even as he was working his hand into her underwear, his other was coming up to her face and gently thumbing her bottom lip out from under her teeth.
“Show me how to make you come,” he said, eyes boring into hers. 
Shit, she might just fall apart from that look alone. 
Rising onto her knees, she shoved her pants and underwear down to give them easier access. His fingers slipped between her lips, and she moaned, pressing toward them.  
“I don’t really get off from penetration,” she said, “I like it, but it won’t make me orgasm, so it’s all about the clit for me.”
Sliding his fingers back from her entrance, he searched for that little nub. “Here?” he asked when he thought he’d found it. 
Reaching down, she moved him where she needed him, so the pads of his fingers were making direct contact. “Here,” she breathed, guiding him to circle over and around her pearl.
Her eyes fluttered closed, and he devoured the pleasure that flowed over her face. 
“I like this, too,” she said, moving his fingers into a V so they traced on either side. 
He started a pattern from her instructions — circling and stroking, then splitting as he pulled back. 
“You can press harder,” she moaned softly.
He did, and her hips stuttered into his touch. 
“Can you…” she trailed off, feeling suddenly shy. She’d never asked a man for this before. Then again, this was Nico. He’d taken every other instruction to heart and was touching her exactly the way she wanted. She knew he would at least try.
“Anything,” he rasped, “tell me.”
Hips seeking, she moaned and loved that he was so willing to please her. She could see it in the way he was watching her — this eager, desperate look in his eyes, full of wonder and desire and so much need. 
“Can you suck my nipples?” she finally whispered. 
Growling something affirmative, he leaned in and drew one of the tender buds between his lips. 
Her voice keened, and her hand flew into his hair to cradle him to her chest, “use your tongue,” she instructed, then moaned, “yes, Nico,” when he laved over the sensitive peak. 
He was so turned on by her. By her confidence in knowing what she wanted and that she trusted him enough to tell him. Not to mention the way his name was panting out of her mouth.
Her back arched, pushing her hips into his hand and her breast into his mouth.
If Nico had known pleasing a woman could come with instructions like this, it would have changed his whole life.
He moved to the other breast, almost suckling at the tender bud. 
“Fuck, Nico,” she moaned, “feels so good.” 
“Show me how to take you there.” 
“Put your fingers inside me.”
He obeyed even though he didn’t know how he’d stroke her clit now. Just as he was getting ready to detach his other hand from her breast, she guided his wrist so the heel of his hand pressed into her.
“Nico,” she moaned as pleasure flooded her system. Her hips ground into his hand. He felt incredible. God, was this what she’d been missing every time a man asked what she wanted and then did what they wanted anyway?
Her next words fell apart just as she did, turning as nonsensical as her rhythm.
Even watching the pleasure roll over her face didn’t prepare him for the feeling of her coming. He'd never felt anything like it. Her muscles clenched in quick succession, fluttering around his fingers. Fuck. If she did this around his cock? He might die. 
All at once, the pleasure surging through her snapped, and she collapsed against him. 
Nico eased his fingers from her and eased them up to his mouth, eyes rolling back at the first taste of her. He couldn’t wait to get his mouth on her. 
Before he could suggest they move to the bedroom, she was curling against him and tucking her face into his neck. Her breathing slowed. It was late - well past her usual bedtime, and Nico knew how a good orgasm could relax his body right to sleep if he was already tired. 
“I love you,” she whispered into his neck. 
A thrill zinged through him. “I love you, too,” he said, stroking a hand up her spine. 
Upon waking, the first thing Lena noticed was that her breasts were bare, nipples puckered so tightly in the chilly morning air that they ached. Somehow, though, the rest of her wasn’t cold. 
Trying to roll over, she ran into a solid body behind her. 
The night before came crashing back. Nico posing for her before admitting he loved her. He loved her! Part of her still couldn’t believe it. She smiled, remembering the incredible way he looked falling apart beneath her before he teased the most incredible orgasm she’d ever had from her body. So incredible, she’d fallen asleep right in his lap. He must have moved them into this spooning position on the couch rather than moving her into her own bed. 
Her phone trilled again. That’s what had woken her. Where was it? It sounded nearby.
Nico mumbled something and tightened his arms around her when she tried to get up. 
When it rang for the third time, she realized it wasn’t ringing at all - it was her alarm. She needed to get up. As much as she wanted to just stay here and recreate the night before again and again and again, something Nico wouldn’t have minded if his hot length currently pressing into her back was any indication, she couldn’t. She had to show Professor Brown her sketches, and she had a painting to turn in in her post modernism class.
“Nico, I have to get up,” she said, lifting his arm from around her waist. Her chest was itchy from where his cum had dried on her skin. 
“Nonig,” he mumbled, pulling her back into him. 
“Yes.”
Finally managing to extract herself, she immediately fell off the couch. 
“Are you okay?” he asked, voice still thick with sleep.
God, he was adorable waking up. Mussed hair and heavy lidded eyes. 
Nico didn’t want this moment to end. It couldn’t. It was too good. He watched, amused, as she tripped over her pants before tearing them down her legs and kicking them them off before she stumbled into the kitchen.
She finally found her phone — she’d left it on the counter — and cursed when she saw the time. She didn’t even have time to shower. 
He groaned a pleasant curse in his native tongue and rolled onto his back, stretching his arms over his head. Sleeping on the couch was definitely not going to help him in the game tonight. 
He sat up abruptly. “What time?” he called.
“It’s 9:05. I have to go to class.” she said, debating if she should just pull her jeans on and go. No, if she couldn’t shower, she at least needed to change. 
He cursed again,  jumping to his feet. This was not how he wanted the morning after to go. He wanted to make her breakfast in bed and ravish her again before he had to leave. Now, he had to rush. Practice started in 30 minutes, and it would take him 20 to get to the rink.
He ran to his bedroom and stopped short. There was a suitcase next to his dresser. He’d forgotten he was heading out on a road trip. 
Running his hands into his hair, he wondered how this could have happened. He would have to be at the arena before she got home from class, and then they would leave from there to catch their flight to Florida. He finally got her, and he had to leave. This was the worst morning after he could have imagined. 
Attempting to run down the hall and pull on her chucks at the same time probably wasn’t the best plan, but Lena needed to see him before he left. She wouldn’t see him again for six whole days. Stumbling, she crashed through his doorway just in time to watch him pulling on a new pair of underwear. She finally got her other shoe on before she stood up, pushing her hair out of her face. 
He turned to her, and she lost her breath. She’d seen him naked, and he still did this to her. 
“I’m sorry, I have to go,” she said quietly. 
He didn’t hesitate to stride to her, take her face in his hands, and kiss her deeply, like he’d wanted to for so many years. He was never giving up the opportunity again. 
Gathering her against him, he broke the kiss in favor of burying his face in her hair. “I wish this morning was different.”
“I know, I do, too. But I’ll be here when you get back,” she assured, running her hands down his back. At the tail end of her stroke, she let her fingers curve in so her nails traced over his skin. 
He pulled back to look into her eyes, cheeks dimpling. 
A smile spread over her face, and she leaned up to brush her lips over his, “I’ll see you on Thursday.” 
He nodded. 
“Good luck,” she said, kissing him again, “I love you.” 
Maybe this morning wasn’t so bad after all. “I love you, too.” 
The smile she gave him made him want to move mountains. 
“Thank you again,” she said, leaning in to kiss him one more time. 
“For what?” he called after her as she ran down the hall. 
“For everything,” she called back. “For all of it.” 
It Doesn't Matter:
Part I | Part II | Part III | Playlist
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meazalykov · 6 days
Text
getting what she wants
lena oberdorf x oc x USWNT!reader
part one of five
summary: lena knows she gets what she wants
warnings: cheating, angst, 18+ (smut? not too detailed and mostly suggestive)
oc description here
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you and your girlfriend had always been complicated—never simple, never easy. 
it started back in 2021 when you and sloan played at psg. the chemistry on the field between you two was undeniable, but off the field, it was a different story. 
the beginning wasn’t so bad, though. she caught feelings for you shortly after she went through a breakup, but you didn’t think much of it. you were happy that someone was interested in you, someone as gorgeous as sloan. 
if you were to tell anyone about it now, you'd say it wasn’t the worst relationship, but it definitely wasn’t the best either.
sloan was magnetic, and in those early days, you were drawn to her like everyone else was drawn to her. the older woman was a fierce defender in paris, while you were a threatening midfielder that scared the defenders on the opposite team. 
the woman would pull you in, wrap you up in her intensity, and you’d get lost in the way she’d look at you, the way she’d run up to you if you took a hit on the pitch– it was like you were her whole world. and for a while, it felt like you were.
savannah was always there, in the background, but you didn’t mind. you played with both of them on the united states national team, and savannah never seemed like a threat.
she was just part of the past with sloan—something you didn't think twice about. you had bigger things to worry about, like football, your career. you weren’t the type to get jealous over old exs that your girlfriend had.
things shifted in 2022 when you left for bayern munich, after you spent three seasons with PSG. 
the move was huge for you. it was a chance to grow, to focus on your game in another league, and push yourself to new heights. 
sloan went back to the states, joining portland thorns. her contract didn’t expire with PSG but she didn’t want to stay if you weren’t there.
the long distance was rough, but you both promised to make it work. you'd have late-night calls, texting between training sessions, and sending each other pictures of your day, trying to stay connected despite the time zone difference.
but then, overtime, you started noticing things. 
small, subtle shifts. the first time sloan told you that her and savannah texting again. at first, you were alarmed until sloan told you that savannah, who played for louisville, was going to go up against the thorns in the NWSL that week. 
you told yourself it was nothing. they’d known each other forever; of course, they'd stay in touch. your mind brushed it off, telling yourself that your trust in sloan was stronger than whatever history she had with savannah.
but it didn’t take long for sophia, your friend on the national team who played at the same club as sloan, to notice. 
during one of your national team camps, the ones against china in florida, she pulled you aside, a concerned look on her face.
“have you talked to sloan recently?” she asked, her tone light but her eyes searching.
“yeah, of course,” you replied, a little confused by her question.
“why?”
sloan was still recovering from an ACL injury, so her club and national team agreed to have the 26 year old play for only portland games for now. she wasn’t called up for the national team so you couldn’t see her this time in the states.
sophia sighs in hesitation,
“i don’t want to stir anything up, but sloan was showing me some tiktok on her phone unaware that um...well,, i saw some messages. between her and savannah. they seemed kinda... i don’t know, close?”
you felt your stomach drop, but you forced a laugh. 
“it’s nothing. they’re just friends.” you convinced yourself. 
“just be careful, okay?” sophia didn’t look convinced. 
you nodded, but that seed of doubt had already been planted. 
later that night, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. the way sloan’s messages had become more distant, the way she’d brush off your questions with a quick “i’m just busy babe” or “practice has been rough.” you tried to push it down, telling yourself it was all in your head.
until one day, you couldn’t anymore.
a few weeks later, you were scrolling through your phone after a long training session in germany when you saw it. videos. 
they were everywhere—sloan and savannah, out at some club in portland, laughing, dancing, and way too close for comfort. the headlines were brutal, and your stomach twisted into knots as you scrolled through the comments, people speculating about what was going on between them.
you couldn’t breathe.
immediately, you dialed sloan’s number, your fingers shaking as you waited for her to pick up.
you had to run into your living room, since lea and georgia were staying over your house and were sleeping in the guest room beside your bedroom. there was no way that you would wake them up, even in this condition.
“hey, babe,” she answered casually, as if nothing had happened.
“what the FUCK, sloan?” your voice cracked, the anger and hurt pouring out all at once. 
there was a pause on the other end, just long enough to make you feel even worse.
“it’s not what it looks like,” she finally said, her voice too calm, too rehearsed.
“it sure as hell doesn’t look good,” you shot back. 
“you’re out partying with savannah? after you told me there was nothing going on?”
sloan sighed. 
“i told you, it’s nothing. we just went out for drinks with our teams. it’s not a big deal.”
“not a big deal?” you couldn’t believe what you were hearing. 
“sloan, everyone’s talking about it. you’re all over the news. do you even realize how this makes me look? do you know how this makes YOU look?”
you hated how much you still cared about her and her image. of course everyone on the internet was dragging sloan’s name through the filth for your defense. 
“you’re overreacting. savannah’s just a friend who happens to be my ex too. you need to stop letting other people get into your head.” sloan said, annoyed. 
but you couldn’t calm down. how could you? not when the entire world had just seen your girlfriend getting close with her ex like it was nothing. 
your heart ached, torn between the love you still had for sloan and the anger bubbling inside you.
“i can’t believe you,” you whispered, tears stinging your eyes. 
“i trusted you!”
“and i haven’t done anything to break that trust,” sloan shot back, her voice harder now. 
“look, if you don’t trust me, that’s on you. i can’t control how people perceive things.”
you hung up the phone without another word, your chest heavy, the pain sinking deeper with every passing second.
as you collapsed onto the ground, you felt a pair of arms catch you. the vanilla scent of the person’s chest told you that it was lea schuller hugging you as you cried. 
weeks afterwards– you threw yourself into training, trying to ignore the hurt, the betrayal. but it lingered, gnawing at you, distracting you during every practice, every match. no matter how hard you tried to focus, your mind kept wandering back to sloan, to those videos, to the lies.
you couldn’t go to the states to confront her, and that only made it worse. you were stuck, miles away, helpless.
many months later, it's July 1st 2024. despite everything—the distance, the arguments, the emotional drain—you and sloan were still together. 
maybe it was the comfort of it all, the familiarity. you’d been with her for so long that the thought of letting go felt impossible. breaking up seemed like more effort than just sticking it out. 
even if things weren’t great, they weren’t unbearable. or at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself.
sloan wasn’t seen with her ex again. in fact, she never mentioned savannah again, and you didn’t ask. but the tension hung between you like a fog, thick and ever-present. every time you checked social media, every time her name came up in conversation, your stomach would knot up, the unease always lingering. but nothing ever changed.
after each conversation with sloan, you felt empty. like a weight had been lifted, but at the same time, it left a hollow space inside you. the next few days passed in a blur. 
you threw yourself into training, desperate to block out the pain, but even football wasn’t the escape it usually was.
that’s when lena oberdorf started showing up in your life. she’d recently moved to bayern from wolfsburg, and though you’d played against her plenty of times, you never really knew her well. she was fierce on the pitch, strong and confident. 
in fact, you had a perception of her since you fell victim to her side tackles on many, many occasions. but you started to notice lena’s behavior around you after training, she was different—softer, a little shy even.
it started with small things. lena would linger after practice, making conversation, asking how you were doing. 
at first, you chalked it up to her being friendly, trying to settle into her new team and make friends outside of the ones she knew from the national team.
a week later, before the national break that will lead into the olympics– training was going well. your focus was locked in on the drills as the team worked through possession exercises. 
everything felt sharp, crisp. your legs were taking you towards the goal until georgia came in hard, a tackle from the side catching your leg at an awkward angle. you hit the ground hard, a sharp pain shooting through your ankle.
“y/n!” you heard georgia’s voice above the ringing in your ears as she stands up from the ground. 
“shit shit shit!!! i’m so sorry. i didn’t mean to—”
before she could finish, lena was already by your side, practically sprinting over from the other side of the field. 
she dropped to her knees next to you, her hands immediately on your shoulders.
“are you okay? where does it hurt?” lena’s voice was frantic, her eyes wide with concern as she looked you over, clearly scanning for any sign of serious injury.
“i’m fine, lena,” you muttered, trying to sit up. 
“just... give me a sec.” the pain wasn’t as bad as you first thought. it was more of a shock than anything.
lena wasn’t having it. 
“you don’t look fine,” she insisted, gently pushing you back down as you tried to get up.
“you should stay down for a bit. what if it’s worse than you think?”
georgia hovered nearby, an apologetic look on her face. “i didn’t mean to go in that hard. really, i’m sorry, y/n.”
“what the hell, georgia? you didn’t have to go in on her like that—it’s training, not a match!” lena shot her a glare, her protective streak kicking in immediately.
“i know, i know,” georgia said, holding up her hands in surrender. 
“i was just going for the ball, i didn’t mean to hurt her.”
you could see the tension building between the two of them, 
lena getting more worked up than necessary. it wasn’t the first time lena had gotten overprotective over you, but this was definitely one of the more intense moments. you placed a hand on her arm, trying to calm her down.
“lena, seriously, i’m fine. it’s not a big deal.”
but she wasn’t having it. “no, it is a big deal. she should’ve been more careful.”
georgia rolled her eyes but kept her distance, clearly not wanting to escalate things. the rest of the team had started to gather around, watching the scene unfold with a mixture of concern and amusement.
“she’s tough, lena,” georgia said with a small smile, trying to diffuse the situation. 
“she’s not made of glass.” you wanted to giggle after georgia said that, but you didn’t want to piss off a protective lena. 
“maybe, but that doesn’t mean you can just throw her to the ground,” lena snapped back, still kneeling beside you, her hands hovering protectively around you like she was scared you might fall apart any second.
"you're one to talk about putting people on the ground!" georgia says before laughing at lena's smirk, a smirk she tried to hide knowing that georgia is right.
the team, noticing the bickering, started exchanging looks. 
a few stifled laughs could be heard, and you knew exactly what was coming.
“uh, lena?” tuva called out from behind you, a teasing grin on her face. “y/n is okay.”
tuva pulls lena, gently, away from you as you stand up. your ankle is sore but not painful. you were okay.
“you do realize y/n’s taken, right?” lea whispered to lena, but you still heard it.
you groaned inwardly, knowing exactly where this was headed.
“yeah, lena, i don’t think her girlfriend would be too happy about all this... care you’re giving y/n,” giulia added, her voice dripping with amusement.
lena flushed, her cheeks turning a shade of red you hadn’t seen before. she quickly stood up, brushing off her shorts, though she still hovered close to you, as if she wasn’t quite ready to leave your side.
“i’m just making sure she’s okay,” lena muttered, avoiding everyone’s eyes.
you couldn’t help but laugh a little despite the situation. “lena, seriously, i’m fine. you don’t need to go full paramedic on me. besides guys, you don’t have to mention her while we are here”
“oh!” sydney says, laughing. 
the teasing continued, the team now fully enjoying the spectacle. 
“she’s going full-on protective mode, isn’t she?” pernille chuckled, giving lena a nudge. 
“you’ve got it bad, oberdorf.” madga joins. 
“it’s just concern,” lena muttered, clearly embarrassed now, trying to avoid the teasing looks being thrown her way.
you finally managed to walk, rolling your ankle a bit to check for any real damage. again, it was sore, but nothing too serious. you were fine—like you’d been saying all along. 
“see? i told you. i’m okay.”
“well, that’s a relief,” lena mumbled, though the look of worry in her eyes hadn’t completely disappeared. she stood a little closer than necessary, and the team noticed.
they noticed how you let her stay close to you too.
“yeah, ‘relief,’” georgia echoed, shaking her head in amusement. 
“seriously though, y/n’s fine. no need to be so protective, lena—- i’m sorry y/n.”
the teasing continued as the team dispersed, but lena stayed near you, still looking a little flustered. 
“i just didn’t want her to be hurt,” she said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper.
you gave her a soft smile, appreciating her concern, even if it was a little overboard. 
“i know. but it’s okay. i’m tougher than i look.”
lena saw lea’s smile turn into a quick frown at that, she makes a mental note to question her best friend about that later. 
after that morning in training, you began to notice the way lena looked at you. there was something more in her eyes, something you hadn’t picked up on before.
the next day, after a tough session, you were sitting on the sidelines, catching your breath, when lena plopped down beside you.
“you okay?” she asked, her voice gentle, her eyes scanning your face.
you nodded, forcing a smile. “yeah, just tired.”
but lena wasn’t convinced. “i’ve noticed you’ve been... off lately. is it sloan?”
lena asked lea why you seemed off. lea told her the backstory about your relationship with the portland thorn’s defender. she did her own research afterwards, realizing how bad it really was.
the mention of sloan’s name made your stomach twist. you didn’t want to talk about her, not now, not ever. 
“it’s complicated.”
lena hesitated for a moment, then quietly said, 
“you don’t deserve what she is putting you through, y/n. you deserve someone who’s going to put you first.”
you glanced at her, surprised by the intensity in her words. there was something in the way she said it, the quiet conviction, that made you pause.
“it’s not that simple,” you mumbled, looking down at the ground.
“we’ve been together for so long, and— i don’t know.”
“maybe that’s the problem,” lena said, her voice soft but firm. 
“maybe you’ve been holding on to something that’s already gone.”
you didn’t respond. you couldn’t, because deep down, you knew she was right. sloan wasn’t fighting for you anymore, and maybe she never had.
lena stayed by your side for the rest of the day, offering silent support. 
and as the days went on, her presence became something you looked forward to—her quiet smiles, her easy laughter, the way she’d stick around just to make sure you were okay.
it wasn’t long before you started noticing the little things she did for you. bringing you coffee before training, giving you rides home, offering to help with your recovery sessions after each training. 
it was subtle, but there was a certain care in everything she did, something you hadn’t felt from sloan in a long time.
one afternoon, the last training before the national break for the olympics, lena comes up to you after the showers. 
“hey, you want to grab dinner?” she asked casually, but there was something in her tone that made your heart race a little faster.
“uh, yeah, sure,” you replied, caught off guard.
you ended up at a quiet restaurant, tucked away from the usual chaos. 
over dinner, lena was different. more open, more confident. she asked about your life, your interests outside of football, and for the first time in a while, you found yourself genuinely enjoying someone’s company.
halfway through the meal, she leaned back in her chair, her eyes locking onto yours. 
“y/n, can i be honest with you?”
your heart skipped a beat. “of course.”
“I've been attracted to you for a long time,” she admitted, her cheeks flushing slightly. 
“since before you moved to bayern. but i didn’t want to say anything because... well, i knew you were with sloan.”
you blinked, taken aback by her confession. “you... have?”
she nodded, her gaze unwavering. “yeah. but i’ve been watching how things have been going with you two, and... i just want you to know that you deserve someone who’s going to treat you better. someone who has respect for you.”
you stared at her, not sure how to respond. it wasn’t that you hadn’t noticed lena’s growing presence in your life, but hearing her say it out loud, admitting her feelings so openly, was something you hadn’t expected.
“lena, i...” you started, but the words got stuck in your throat. you didn’t know what to say. part of you was still reeling from sloan, from the hurt and confusion that came with it. 
but another part of you—a part you hadn’t allowed yourself to acknowledge—felt something for lena too. something more.
she must’ve sensed your hesitation because she quickly added, “i’m not trying to pressure you or anything. i just wanted you to know how i feel. whatever happens, i’m here for you liebe. no matter what.”
her words hung in the air, heavy with meaning, and for the first time in weeks, you felt a glimmer of hope. maybe lena was right. maybe you did deserve more.
as the night went on, you found yourself relaxing in her presence, the tension from your relationship with sloan slowly easing away. 
it was different with lena—easier, lighter. and when she walked you back to your apartment later that night, there was a moment where she hesitated, standing on the doorstep, her eyes flicking to your lips.
you could’ve kissed her. part of you wanted to. 
“thanks for tonight,” you whispered, your voice soft.
lena smiled, her expression gentle. “anytime, y/n. i’m always here for you.”
something in the air had shifted after she said that, leaving only the quiet between you two. 
lena was standing just a little too close, her gaze a little too intense, and you could feel the weight of everything unsaid hanging in the space between you.
her eyes flickered down to your lips again, and for a moment, she seemed to freeze. your heart pounded in your chest as the silence stretched on, each second amplifying the tension between you both. 
you couldn’t tear your gaze away from her, drawn in by the way she was looking at you, the unspoken desire clear in her eyes.
the way she cares for you, the way you’ve been burying your attraction for her. It was too much. you wanted her.
your mind was racing—everything with sloan, the mess of your relationship, how complicated it all was. 
but in that moment, none of it mattered. not with lena looking at you like that.
you made the first move, your body acting on instinct before your brain could catch up. 
leaning in slowly, tentatively, you closed the gap between you, your lips barely brushing hers at first. 
you paused, just for a second, giving her the chance to pull away if she wanted to. but she didn’t.
the second lena kissed you back, everything else melted away. her lips met yours with a sudden intensity, all the built-up tension finally spilling over. 
her hands were on you in an instant, one sliding to the back of your neck, the other finding your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss deepened.
it wasn’t gentle—not by any means. there was an urgency in the way she kissed you, and the way you kissed her. she’d been holding back for far too long, and now that the floodgates were open, there was no going back. 
you responded in kind, your hands gripping the front of her hoodie, pulling her even closer as you kissed her harder, your body pressing against hers.
lena’s hand slipped under the hem of your shirt, her fingers warm against your skin as they traced the curve of your waist, making you shiver. 
the feeling of her touch sent a jolt of electricity through you, your heart racing even faster. your lips moved against hers in sync, the kiss growing more heated by the second, both of you caught up in the intensity of the moment.
you broke apart for a brief second, both of you gasping for air, but the space between you barely lasted a heartbeat before lena’s lips were on yours again, even more desperate than before. her body pressed into yours, pushing you gently against the door, and you welcomed the pressure, your hands finding their way into her hair, tugging just enough to earn a quiet groan from her.
“lena,” you breathed against her lips, not even sure what you were trying to say, if anything at all. her name came out like a plea, like you were drowning in her and needed more, but didn’t know how to ask for it.
“y/n,” she murmured back, her voice low and husky, her breath hot against your skin as she kissed along your jaw, trailing down to your neck. 
the sensation sent a shiver down your spine, your knees going weak as you clung to her, desperate to stay grounded in the overwhelming rush of feelings.
her hand gripped your waist tighter, holding you against her as her lips moved across your skin, finding every sensitive spot that made you gasp, your fingers tightening in her hair as you struggled to keep up with the intensity of it all.
you weren’t thinking about sloan anymore, or the complications that would come from this. all that mattered was the way lena was making you feel—the way her lips felt on yours, the way her touch set your skin on fire.
and when lena pulled back just enough to look at you, her eyes dark and filled with something raw, something intense, you knew there was no going back. 
you reached your left hand behind your body, keeping your right on lena’s waist, as you unlocked the door. 
pulling the taller woman inside, you didn’t think twice before taking her into your bedroom.
the sex was amazing. its been nearly 18 months since you last tine you’ve did anything, thanks to your long distance relationship.
the girl back in portland didn’t come across your mind once. just the moment between you, the girl who's sleeping in your arms, and the fact that you’ll have a flight back to the states for national duty in the morning. 
part two here
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In Bloom 1
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No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon/dubcon, allusions to trauma, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: After wasting much of your youth in a toxic situation, things are starting to look up. That's until you meet a certain flower seller.
Characters: Cole Turner, short!reader
Note: Tomorrow is beach day for me.
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.
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The city streets seem to slant around you, looming outside the car windows, blurring at the edges. Your displacement adds to the effect, making your dizzy, leaving your hands raw as you wring them compulsively. You shrink back into your seat, shying away from the world that seems so scary to you. 
Aunt Bev is completely unbothered. She sings along to her favourite 80s bop as she keeps speed with the rest of traffic. She's always in a sunny mood but that day, she beams even brighter. When you asked why, she was almost stunned by the question; 'well, sweetheart, it's your birthday!' 
You forgot. Or didn't care. You never really celebrate. Your last birthday you can barely discern from all the other grim days. You try not to think of that life you had before Aunt Bev showed up to drag you into the light. You suppose it's probably been just under a year since. 
As if sensing your grey thought, she reaches to turn the volume down. She resumes her firm grip on the wheel and peeks over quickly. She smiles as she stops at the changing light. 
"You get a free scoop. You got your ID?" She says. 
You nod. That's one of the things that's new to you. Before you never even had a library card. Before, it was like you never even existed. As far as the world was concerned, you didn't.  
You look down at the purse in your lap. Your cousin Lena gave it to you. She said she never used it and it suited you better. There was a lot she handed over, though without any real concern. Her and your other cousin, Mason, have so much, they hardly know the difference. 
You stare at the embroidered petals on the black velvet. Lena's wrong. It's too nice for you. 
You tear your hands apart and lift the flap. You slide out the small wallet within. Another inherited piece. You slip out the ID card and stare at the photo. It doesn't really look like you but you've never really been able to recognise yourself. Your features always struck you as unfamiliar. 
You remember when you went to fill out the paperwork. Standing in front of that lens, staring into its black eye, and the sudden flash. You tuck the card away and shove the wallet back in the depths of the purse. 
"Lena's making you a cake," Bev says, "she always loves an excuse to make a mess of my kitchen." 
You try to laugh, it's more a crackle. That's the thing about Aunt Bev, everything is so careless to her, so easy. It all feels so strange to you. You don't fit but no one else seems to notice. 
"Mason should be there but heavens knows he's always late. That's not my doing, by the way, your uncle's always been horrible about time," she scoffs. 
You hum to acknowledge you're listening. The mention of your cousin and uncle make you uneasy. It isn't that they're bad. No, they're so nice, like Lena and Bev, but they're men. You try not to hold that against them but you've never been very comfortable around them. Not that you spent much time around male counterparts. 
"Twenty-five," she preens, "exciting." 
You clear your dry throat, "yep." 
You tuck your chin down and fidget with the strap of the purse. Twenty-five. Halfway through your first decade of adulthood and you still feel like a child. It's nothing to celebrate but Aunt Bev sees everyday as a reason. 
She puts on her signal and waits in the line of cars. You squint through her side and see the bustling of vehicles and people in a large lot. All this for ice cream. You told her you aren't particularly hungry even but she insisted. 
She turns and rolls into the lot, finding a spot amid the tight lines. She sighs and pulls the visor down to check her dyed waves in the mirror. She's always so put together. She tried to help you but you don't like the feel of mascara and you had an allergic reaction to the lip gloss. She didn't try again. 
"Alright, ice cream!" She snaps the visor up, "do you know which flavour you want?" 
You unbuckle your seat belt and shrug, "I don't know what they have." 
"Fair," she tilts her head as she opens her door, "I'm feeling a good old vanilla cone." 
You get out and shut the door. You hook the purse on your shoulder and meet her by the hood. You walk in step with her, peering around at the other people streaming towards the other side of the lot. There’s a large archway leading to a large plot of booths and stands. It’s a market of some sort, the kind you’ve only seen on television. 
“I thought we were getting ice cream,” you say as you grip your purse. 
“They have ice cream. I have another surprise. For your birthday,” she insists, “I wanted to buy you a gift.” 
“Oh? I don’t need one.” 
“I want to,” she says, “me and Lena used to come here all the time. You’ll like it.” 
You don’t argue. You have no right to. She’s doing you a favour. Another one.  
It’s crowded but everyone seems happy. You’re not used to all the noise or clamour. A woman pushes a stroller ahead of you as her husband chases a lively toddler past her. You press your chapped lips together and hold in your unease. 
You’re not the best in these sort of situations. Too many people, too much going on. Just going down to City Hall to get your ID was a lot. The hospital too. Those stiff, cramped plastic chairs and people filling even the space between them. 
You keep your shoulders curled in as you walk with Bev. You end up behind her, following her lead, stopping where she stops, looking at whatever she looks at. She points out a crystal sunflower necklace and you smile and nod. When you see the price, you frown. 
“Maybe something else. I don’t wear jewelry,” you say. You don’t wear it because you never had it. 
“It would be so pretty,” she remarks. 
“No, really, it’s... nice, but not for me.” 
You sidle on. There’s a table of soaps so pungent they make your head cloudy, and candles that look like whipped desserts. You cross to another booth and Bev buys some local honey and apple butter. She likes the honey in her tea in the evening. She always makes you a cup too. 
She shows you the wildflower honey giddily and points you onward. You stick close, following her direction as it keeps your head from spinning. You go to crocheter’s stand with stuffed animals meant for the children shouting and running around more than you. That whale might be cute but you’re not a child anymore, are you? 
You carry on. Bev shows you several other things. A little compact mirror with mother of pearl on the case and a hand-painted wooden chest you could put on your dresser. The dresser she bought in the room she gave you in the house she pays for. 
“You really don’t need to buy my anything. The ice creams good enough,” you say as your doubt bubbles over but it’s too loud for her to hear you. And she’s too distracted. 
Aunt Bev stands on her toes, though she’s already a tall figure, and waves at someone. She grabs your wrist and you wince as she pulls you through the swaths of people. You want to tear away as her grip makes you itch. You don’t like being touched. You’re not used to it. 
She pulls you to another row of stalls and stops before a medley of plants. There's a little chalkboard sign in the corner that reads ‘Cole’s Corner’. Pots line the top of the table, cacti and spider plants and succulents. Their green and lovely and lush. 
Bev lets go and you stare down at them. They��re familiar. They’re pretty. You could smile if your ears weren’t burning from the bustling people around. 
You’ve always known soil, always known the smell of pollen and the tough roots of unwanted weeds. When you weren’t trapped in your room, you were stranded in the garden, searching for bright petals or nursing wilting stems. Out in the dirt, you didn’t have to worry about anything. 
Often Aunt Bev found you in the plot she allotted you among her rose bushes and tulips. The space you made your own with the gnome you painted yourself. That was one of her little crafts she liked to do. She always had an idea for something or the other; waxed-linen to use as reusable bowl covers or tie-dye tee shirts. 
You stare down at a pot of aloe vera. The pot is clay; the base is brown and the top is painted white. You admire the jutting rigid leaves as the chaos around you settles into the background. You lean in closer at the burst of colour behind it, a bunch of pleasant pink begonias. 
“Cole,” your aunt chirps, “busy today.” 
“Sure is,” the man behind the table answers and your eyes flick up as you nearly jump.  
You hadn’t seen him. You were too distracted by the fauna. You don’t know how you didn’t. He’s tall and his blue eyes twinkle as they meet yours. You quickly shy away as the sight of his soft hay brown hair lingers in your mind. 
“This your sister?” He asks. 
“Oh, Cole, don’t be silly. You can flatter me all you like. You’re still a horrible salesman.” 
“Usually works,” he chuckles, “daughter?” 
“You’ve met Lena,” she chides then introduces you by name, “this is my niece. Hon, this is Cole. He grows these all himself.” 
“Ah, the niece,” he snaps his fingers. “I remember.” 
As he turns away you continue to peruse. Your cheeks are burning. You’re suddenly not as content to browse the plants. Not as you feel the sting of that man’s gaze nipping at you. It’s just the way he’d looked at you. Maybe just that he’d even saw you. 
Suddenly, a pot wrapped in burlap is set down in front of you. You examine the yellow petals and peek over at Aunt Bev. She grins and her gaze trails between you and the man. You gulp and turn back to once more consider the flowers. 
“Daylily,” you murmur. 
He leans in and lets out a scratchy noise, “that’s right.” 
You suck in your lower lip. You hadn’t meant to say it out loud. Your lashes flick up then down as you can’t figure what to do with yourself. 
“You like flowers? Your aunt says you spend all your time in the garden.” 
You shrug, then nod, and once more dart a look over at Aunt Bev. She said all that? To him? Why? 
“How about that one?” She comes closer as she reaches for her purse, “it’s her birthday. I’d like her to get something nice for her.” 
“Can’t go wrong with day lily. They keep bloom for a while but each blossom only lasts about a day,” he turns the pot slightly as he speaks, “symbolic of devotion and forgetting worries. They brighten the place right up.” 
“So?” Aunt Bev nudges you with her elbow. 
You dip your chin, “um, sure, okay. Thank you, Aunt Bev.” 
“Flowers are always a good gift. These ones won’t need much in the winter either. They’ll come right back,” he explains, “is that all?” 
“Yep, I think you’ve bled me dry,” Bev kids as she hands over her money, “I only have so much room left in the backyard.” 
“Ah, don’t got that problem on the farm. Sometimes, I don’t know what to do with all the land,” he counts out her change from a metal box. 
“Must be nice. I swear, living in the city can be so... suffocating,” Bev mopes as she tucks away the coins. “Go on, hon, you wanna carry your flowers?” 
You mutter your acquiescence and step forward to reach for the pot. Before you can, that man, Cole, slides it out of your grasp. “Wait, one minute.” He turns and digs around in a crate hidden beneath the perpendicular table, “it’s your birthday, isn’t it?” He pulls out a ribbon, the same colour as the daylily, “just put a proper bow on.” 
He ties it up in a drooping uneven bow. You peek up at his face as he gives it a helpless smile and shrugs, “not perfect but... happy birthday.” 
He pushes the pot towards you and you cautiously take it. His large hand brushes yours and you quickly bring the flowers against your stomach, recoiling a step back from the table. His fingers fall onto the table and he taps them. 
“Oh, wait,” he turns once more and digs around, this time in a bag on the top of the table, “Marvita brough these over from her booth.” He takes out a small box and lifts the lid to reveal an array of macarons in a variety of hues, “I can’t eat them all.” he shoves the box at you, “please.” 
You don’t move but Bev eagerly accepts one; a pink one. “Go on,” she urges, “live a little, birthday girl.” 
You scrunch your mouth up and slant it this way, then that. You take a cookie; a green one. As you hug the plant with one arm and retract the other, you remember your manners. A tingle runs through the back of your hand, a memory of those lessons, as the ‘thank you’ tumbles off your tongue. 
You look up and once more your eyes meet. You blanch and swiftly turn away. 
“No problem,” he says brightly, “hey, Bev,” he calls as she goes to shuffle away, “next week?” 
“Eh, I don’t know, my husband’s been on me about the spending,” she laughs, “we’ll see.” 
“Oh yeah, see you then,” he snorts, “you too, I hope.” 
“Uh, bye,” you wave with the cookie and hurry past your aunt. You know he’s talking to you but you can’t face him. He’s just being nice and you won’t be back. 
“I love those, they’re so pretty,” Aunt Bev reaches over to touch the petals, “such a nice man, isn’t he?” 
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once-upon-a-thigh · 1 year
Text
HER
Summary: You’ve been at college for 3 years. Now it’s time to return home to old friends, and old(er) lovers. PERFECT LITTLE SECRET P3 18+
Pairings: Fem! Reader x Milf! Wanda Maximoff, Fem! Reader x Carol Danvers (brief), Reader x Yelena x Kate (platonic).
Warnings: Angst, fluff, smut, fingering, clothed sex, masturbation, large age gap, swearing, lords name in vain?? Couldn’t find my laptop charger so shitty phone format.
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Lips crashed against each other as your bodies desperately ground against the other, aimlessly searching around for any bit of friction among the bedsheets in your dorm that will settle the pulsing of your core.
The hot frenzy was interrupted by the blaring of your ringtone. Ignoring it, you flipped the blonde over with all your strength, grinding down on the crotch of her jeans. The shrill ring didn’t seize however, so pushing yourself up and blowing the hair out of your face with an exasperated sigh, you picked up the device and put it to your ear, shushing the blonde that grabbed at your ass with a frustrated grunt.
“Bout time you picked up.” Drawled the Russian.
Your annoyance almost disappeared at the sound of Yelena’s voice, your friend from high school. You didn’t get to see her often, seeing as you had attended different universities for the last 3 years.
“Well I’m a little preoccupied.” You quirked, breathe still heavy.
“You better not be hooking up with Danvers again.”
You glanced down at the athlete you’re straddling, relieved that she can’t hear the disapproving voice down the line. “So what if I was?” You said through gritted teeth.
“Oh come on Y/N/N!” She exasperated, “she ruined your life!”
The guilt returns as it always did. Did she ruin your life? You still haven’t made up your mind. For a long time you thought so, but with every ignored text and voicemail message to Wanda, you started to convince yourself that maybe the older woman wasn’t the love of your life, that just maybe, Carol did the right thing by telling your parents that day. Still, you can’t help but hold some resentment towards her, hence why despite the fuck-buddy situation you have going on with her, you still refuse to have a full on relationship with the blonde no matter how much she asks.
Yelena took your silence as a sign to change the subject. “Anyway, I’ve called to invite you to a wedding.”
“It’s not yours and Kate’s is it?” You chuckled.
“Ew, as if.” She scoffed. “It’s Nat’s, she’s finally popped the question to Maria.”
“I don’t know Lena, I’m kinda disappointed that your sister’s off the market.” You teased, shuffling when you felt Carol tense under you.
“Fuck off.” You can practically hear her eyes rolling through the phone. “It’s this weekend.”
“This weekend? Christ, they hardly have given me any time to think about it.”
“What can I say? Lesbians.”
You shrugged at her short explanation. To be fair, it’s completely Natasha’s style to plan such an important event with such little time to prepare.
“Listen,” she continues, “I know you don’t like coming back home after everything that happened with your folks, but I miss you, or whatever.”
You rolled your eyes, but smiled anyway. “I’ll be there.”
If you knew that the invite Yelena presented you with would lead you to having a breakdown in your parents’ drive-way… well actually, you’re not all that surprised. Sure, the long drive to your home town had sent plenty of stressful thoughts and scenarios through your head, but the sight of the red Buick you knew all too well parked in the drive across the road confirmed them all. She was still here. She exists, she’s alive, and she still lives here.
You’re not sure how long you sat in your car just watching, waiting for any sign of movement behind the drawn curtains of the house. Her house.
You weren’t sure really how to feel. Wanda Maximoff dropped you the minute your parents threatened her that fateful night.
She didn’t answer the door no matter how much you knocked, and she didn’t answer the phone no matter how much you called. Still, she never blocked you, and your sent messages still remain on “read.” It sickens you how much hope that word fuelled you with, reminding you of the days you just sat there waiting for her to send a response, a response devoting herself to you and confessing her love all over again.
Stop it. You force your gaze to leave the car as you finally make the move to enter your childhood home. You’re over her.. Right?
The sound of silverware scraping dinner plates was the only sound breaking the thick tension of the dining room. Your parents are happy that you’re back, sure, and you were happy to see them. Still, your relationship with them hasn’t been the same since the exposure of your endeavours with Wanda. You fought hard with them for a while before you eventually up and moved for college, leaving a strained relationship with them behind.
Your time away from home (and a heck load of time in therapy) gave you enough time to process everything that happened, and even gave you the strength to forgive your parents. At the end of the day they were only doing what they believed was right in order to protect you, and you couldn’t help but love them for it now that you’ve matured.
Buzz, buzz
You glanced at your phone. Carol.
Buzz, buzz
“Those your college friends honey?” Your father spoke through a mouthful of potato.
“It’s just Carol” you muttered, turning it on do not disturb for an hour.
“Oh Carol!” Your mother tuned in. “I’m glad you’re still seeing her sweetheart, she’s a lovely girl.”
“Yeah.” You stated through gritted teeth.
“Why aren’t you bringing her to the wedding?”
You wiped your mouth with a napkin, stalling an answer to your mum’s nosiness. “I don’t have a plus one, I’m just going with Lena and Kate.”
“Oh,” you can see her cringe physically cringe, “those two.”
The doorbell rang. Speak of the devils.
“Gotta go!” The chair scraped as you got up from the table hastily, silverware clashing with plates as your knees bumped the table on your way up.
“Y/n!” You ignored the scolding as you sprinted to the door, flinging it open and throwing yourself at the two awaiting bodies.
The three of you clung on to each other, giggling when you caught your elbow on Kate’s chin. And just like that things felt normal, the three of you were just hanging out after school, and you hadn’t met Wanda yet.
“Dude! I just saw your ex milf peering through the window. She’s still hot.” Kate laughed, and silence followed.
“Kate, what the fuck?” Yelena looked at her dumbly, luckily not catching your eyes flickering to the quiet house across the street.
“Shit, sorry Y/n/n.” The tall girl pursed her lips.
“It’s alright.” You let out a half real/half fake chuckle, reaching up to throw an arm over her shoulder and steering her inside, the blonde closely following.
The girls ignored your parents, as they have been doing for the past three years, and followed you straight up to your room. For the next hour you laze around on your bed, gossiping, catching up and discussing Nat’s big day tomorrow.
“And she didn’t invite me to her hen night? Can you believe that?” Yelena is mid-rant about her sister (again) when your phone comes off do not disturb.
Buzz buzz
“I mean I’m so fun! Right? You agree with that right? I’m so fun?”
“You’re so fun!” Kate chimes in, sipping on the bottle of rum you had been passing around.
Buzz buzz
“Jesus, who the fuck is that y/n? I’m trying to be pathetic in peace here.” Yelena paused her rant, picking up your phone before you could grab it yourself.
“Oh, my, god.”
“Yelena-“ she pulls the phone away from you, standing up before you can grab it back and begins reading out the messages whilst pacing back and forth.
“I miss tasting you!” She reads, walking around the room as you follow her, making attempts at getting your phone back.
“Woah!” Kate exclaims, looking at you with a dropped jaw. Her mouth hangs open more little by little as Yelena continues to read the messages coming through.
“Why didn’t you invite me to the wedding, I mean I was right there”
“Y/n, pick up the phone.”
“I miss you.”
“You’re with her again aren’t you?”
“I love you, you know I do.”
“-For fucks sake Y/n, she’s mental!” Yelena is exclaims, concern painting her brow as she looks through the messages.
“Who’s this?” Kate leans over the bed, peering over Yelena’s shoulder to get a look at the phone. “Ugh, ‘Captain’? I thought you were done with her.”
“I’m trying to be!” You exasperate, star-fish collapsing on your bed. “It’s just hard, despite everything I know she’s at least going to be there when I need her, you know?”
“Yeah, cause she left you no other choice.” Yelena scoffed. “She’s getting weird babe, it’s time you drop her. For real.”
“Alright.” You roll your eyes. She was getting pretty needy to be fair.
Buzz
“Oh here we go- oh, fuck.” Sitting up, you see the pair looking at each other in shock.
“What is it?” You take your phone back, but not before Yelena gets a final swipe in. Looking at the screen, you see nothing but needy messages from Carol.
“Nothing,” Lena shrugs, shooting Kate a suspicious look. “Just Danvers being a freak.”
Soon the girls left, leaving you alone in your room. It had gone dark outside now, the moon illuminating the parts of your childhood bedroom that the dim bedside lamp could not reach. Your parents had long gone to bed, and there you stood, standing in front of the window and finally letting yourself take in reality. The curtains of her window were closed, but you could see a smidge of light seeping out of the slight gap in the curtain. It was too far away to see in the gap, but the light was enough. You knew she was there, and just the thought left you absolutely soaked.
It seemed like just yesterday your breath was fogging up that very window, chest pressed against the glass, heaving with every pump of her hips. Suddenly you were hot, so very hot. It had been a while since you thought of her like this- actually, that’s a lie. You thought of her like this a lot. What you hadn’t done in a while, is touched yourself whilst thinking of her like this. You usually had distractions, you had Carol. But this time you were alone, and so with the curtains wide open, you began to strip. You took your clothes off slow and sultry, like you used to knowing she was looking. You closed your eyes and pretended, you pretended it was three years ago and the woman you pine for is watching from the window across the street and you show her what’s hers.
Goosebumps followed every brush of your hands as you shred the clothes from your body, breath getting heavier, pussy getting wetter. Before you knew it you were throwing yourself on to your bed, reaching over for the vibrator that had been long forgotten in your bedside table. You let out a sigh of relief as it came to life with a click of the button, the batteries still work. You teased it over the hard peaks of your nipples as you lowered it to your aching core, gasping when it was finally pressed against your pulsing clit.
Fantasies and memories alike flood through your mind as you rubbed the vibrator against your aching bud with one hand, two fingers from the other entering your hole. There was always one common factor with these thoughts, Wanda. You fucked yourself vigorously as you thought of her, of what she might do to you if she was here. Fuck, you missed her. You came with her name slipping past your lips, and with that you knew you weren’t over her, you never could be.
Feeling relief, and some slight self-judgement over what you had just done, you switched the light off before turning over to sleep. Had you been facing the window, maybe you would have seen the slight twitch of her curtains, and her light switching off soon after yours.
Pulling your pencil knee length dress down as you stood, you clapped as the beautiful newlyweds began to make their way down the aisle “I can’t believe they pulled it off,” you muttered to the sobbing brunette beside you.
“T-that was so beautiful.” Kate managed to comment through sobs.
“Oh for god’s sake Bishop keep it together” Yelena elbowed her on her other side.
Nat and Maria’s ceremony was beautiful. Despite it being planned so last minute, it was well put together. They managed to host the wedding at their friend’s hotel. It was quiet and small, only close family and friends attended the ceremony. Now, more people were slowly migrating through the doors as the reception went full swing.
You were just getting in to the ABBA song playing over the speakers, politely sipping on your martini when you were aggressively turned around by your friends that had been acting weird all evening.
“Hey! Heyyy Y/n” Kate grinned weirdly at you.
“Uh, hi Kate?” You looked between the two of them, getting weirded out by how they were smiling awkwardly and constantly glancing over your shoulder. You turned to see what they were looking at, but was immediately pulled back by Yelena’s hand on your face.
“Y/n we have to tell you something!” Kate suddenly screeched.
“No we don’t!” Lena glared at her.
“Oh come on Yel! We can’t avoid her all night.” She groaned, loosening her purple tie.
The blonde ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. “Fine! Y/n, Kate has to tell you something.”
“Oh fuck off Yelena!” Rebutted the brunette.
“Fine! I have to tell you something..”
You began to get nervous. “Uh, okay?”
“Last night, when I was looking at Carol’s messages.. another one came through..”
“Okay? And?” You tried to catch her gaze, but her eyes kept darting between you and whatever it was that was happening behind you.
“It was Wanda.” She winced.
“What?”
“She wanted to let you know she was coming to the wedding..”
“What?”
“I had no idea she knew Nat or Maria I swear!”
“Why didn’t I see the message?” You questionably muttered, your brain feeling completely frazzled.
“I deleted it.” She physically winced.
“What? Why?” You yelled over the music.
“Because I knew you’d freak out!”
“And THIS is better? Oh my god! I’ve got to go! I’ve gotta get out, KATE HELP ME GET OUT!” You shook the brunette by her shoulders.
“It’s too late Y/n!” She pointed behind you.
Finally you turned around, and your heart skipped a beat when your eyes met the green of hers.
Her name dusted your lips on instinct, a name you found yourself missing saying, missing moaning. She looked different, not bad different, just different. Her hair was longer and brighter, combating the dullness in her orbs. Her jaw and cheekbones are more strongly defined than the supple skin you used to kiss. She was slimmer, she almost looked taller. But she was still Wanda. Your Wanda.
Once you came to you finally realised the two of you had just been stood staring at each other from across the room, both taking the other in. You knew you looked different too, and you found yourself hoping she still saw the girl she once loved in you.
“I should, um..” You didn’t even finish whatever your excuse was going to be before your feet were carrying you towards her. She stayed rooted in place, but didn’t break her stare once.
The walk towards her felt like it was forever, though it was only maybe ten seconds. Ten seconds that you spend trying to come up with something to say. Though when you stop just a foot in front of her, you’ve got nothing.
You stood with your mouth open like a fish out of water before you managed to slip out a shy “Hi-”
“-You are so beautiful.” She said at the same time as your pathetic greeting with a sweet delicacy.
“Oh..” Was all you could get your stupid mouth to say.
She looked at you with the same gentleness she usually did, with soft eyes and a tender smile. “How is it possible for you to be even more beautiful than you were then?”
“Well I guess I grew up.” Finally your brain remembered to form sentences.
“I guess you did.” She glanced at the floor, breaking the stare off you didn’t even realise you were having. “Y/n,” your breath hitched hearing her say your name, “will you walk with me?”
You looked at the hand she was offering to you, unsure one what your next move should be.
“I completely understand if you want to go back to your friends and pretend I was never here,” she said strongly, “but I would really like the opportunity to explain myself to you.”
You’re not sure if this explanation was going to make or break you, but god you know you wanted to hear it. So for the first time in 3 years, you took her hand, and followed.
She led you out the doors and through the busy end of the garden until you came across a still, lonely pond. Forgetting about your nice dress that you did not intend to get dirty tonight, you plonked yourself onto the grass, freezing up when she sat next to you.
You broke the silence. “What are you even doing here?”
Wanda thought for a few seconds before she answered. “When what happened, happened.. I guess your friend told Natasha about everything. A week later Maria shows up at my door, and I’m thinking your parents have actually done it, you know? Told everyone? But she sat me down and she just.. let me talk about you, and she supported me. She helped me through everything and if it wasn’t for her I.. I don’t know. She became my friend when I really needed one. Anyway of course she invited me to her wedding and she was kind enough to warn me you were going to be here. I figured I should probably reach out..”
“Yeah I didn’t exactly get that message.” You laughed, “Yelena panicked and deleted it before I could see it.”
She chuckled, “those friends of yours, I always liked them.”
“I thought they annoyed you.” I teased.
“They were slightly annoying,” she laughed, nodding her head. “But they care for you, and they’ve been good friends to you.”
Bitterness swelled when you recalled one of the main reasons as to why you needed their care in the first place. “Yeah well, god knows I needed it.”
She swallowed, slowly nodding. “I’m sorry.”
You scoffed.
“I am Y/n, you have no idea how much.” She faced you, grabbing your hands in hers. You couldn’t bring yourself to pull away. Any measly contact from her sends you in to a secret euphoria. “I swear you have no idea how much I wanted to reach out to you, how many times I picked up the phone without pressing accept, how many times I stood on the other side of the door without opening it-“
“And that’s supposed to make me feel better?” You ripped your hands away from here, but she immediately grabbed them back.
“No! I’m just-“ her lip quivered, you could see her eyes getting watery just as yours were. “I’m just trying to tell you that what I said that day, after your parents caught us, I meant it. I have never wanted anyone like I have wanted you, which is why it was so hard to let you go.”
“So why did you?” You asked calmly.
“Because as real as we were your parents were kind of right too. I’m old, Y/n, and you were, are, so young. I have two kids, an ex-husband, I spend my Friday nights baking and my Saturdays at book club! What business did someone like me have being with someone like you?” She cried.
“Because you loved me! You love me.” Salty tears rolled over the corners of your lips, swollen from how much you had been biting them without even realising.
“I did,” she nodded “I do.”
Your wet doe eyes dropped to her red lips as she drew nearer, tilting back at her eyes again which had gone darker in just a second. They were harrowing and loving, as she wondered what the hell she had been doing those years without you.
“Three years without you was everything and nothing all at once.” She spat out passionately before quickly pressing her lips against yours. You immediately kissed back, the thought of pushing her way not even gracing your mind for a millisecond. Subconsciously, you had been waiting for this moment for a long time.
“I never stopped thinking about you.” She whispered between desperate kisses. Oh, how you missed this.
“Me neither.” You replied, grasping at her suit jacket with selfish hands, falling back on to the grass and pulling her half on top of you. You quivered as her ringed fingers explored your matured curves, slowly moving on from soft grazes to rough grips of the flesh of your thighs and ass.
“I fucking love you detka, you’re never leaving me again. You belong with me, understand?” She spoke in to your neck after she kissed her way down your jaw. You whimpered at the pet name, this being the first time you’ve heard it in so long. You could feel your lace getting uncomfortably wet as you soaked in her possessive talk.
She pinched your thigh when you didn’t respond. “Understand?”
“Yes mommy I understand!” You squealed.
She moaned against your mouth at the term, she missed hearing you whimper it, moan it, scream it.
It has been quite some time since you said it too, and just like that you were snapped back in to the space you once were, forever and always hers.
“Touch me, please mommy, touch my pussy.” You begged through a whisper, looping your fingers in the belt loops by her hips, pulling her in to you until you could feel the gyrating of her hips against your thigh.
She groaned, dropping her head to leave open, wet kisses on your exposed cleavage as she got lost in the feeling of her heat grinding against the muscle of your thigh. She slipped a warm hand up the skirt of your dress, not wasting a second before she was pushing your panties aside and gathering your wetness among her fingers.
She withdrew her hand and traced her slick fingers over your bottom lip. “Can anyone other than mommy make you this wet?”
You shook your head rigorously, tongue reaching out to taste yourself. You didn’t get the chance as she was already sticking them in her own mouth, moaning at the taste. “Mm I’ve missed your taste baby, but I can take my time with that later. For now, you need your cute little cunt fucked don’t you?”
You barely had time to respond before you were throwing your head back, moaning out her name as she plunged two long fingers in to you, curling them in a come hither motion with every thrust. You could only imagine the grass stains your dress would be covered in after this, your back rubbed and wriggled against the green blades with every thrust of her wrist. She put all her body in to fucking you, getting herself off on your thigh at the same time.
You grabbed and scratched at every part of the older woman that you could reach as your body grew rigid as it reached its release.
Wanda chuckled darkly against your sweat-shined skin. “Already detka? It’s a good thing we’ve got all night.”
You came hard on her fingers, harder than you have in the last three years. She was right, no one else could possibly make you feel like this. She ground her hips in to you harder, moaning lowly as the friction against her clit brought her to her climax not long after your own. She collapsed on your still body, breathing heavily as she rolled on to her back, pulling you in to her side.
You still couldn’t believe this was real, who knew this is where you’d end up upon returning home. Part of you wished you had come back sooner. A quiet whisper slipped past your lips, but she heard it. “I missed you.”
Pulling you closer, she pressed her puffy lips to your forehead in a firm kiss. “I missed you too darling.” She brushed her nose against yours, gazing in to your eyes. “I was serious you know, I’m not letting you go.”
“I know,” you smiled, “I’m not going anywhere.”
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I finally did it! Aaaah! Thank you to whoever stuck around long enough to read the third instalment of Perfect Little Secret, I hope you liked it.
I proof read this in between reps at the gym so you can only imagine how that was, sorry if there’s any mistakes.
Meg 😘
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wandamaximoffsbadgirl · 5 months
Text
Beautiful Stranger
You Thought That You Were the Boss Tonight, but I Can Put Up One Good Fight (3)
Mommy!Wanda x Beefy!Fem!Reader
Summary: Your best friend has invited you out to a party and has also told you to try and bring your new girlfriend.
Word Count: 2.5K
Warnings: 18+ MDNI! Alcohol and drug consumption, W eats R out, R uses a strap on W, W is called Mommy, R is called Daddy, Dom/sub dynamics
A/N: Here you go have a party scene
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September 13, 2023
“Hey! Y/N!” You hear your best friend, Yelena, call as she catches up to you in the quad. 
“Hey Lena, what’s up?” We were headed to the same class; English.  
“There’s a party this weekend that Stark is throwing. Are you finally going to come or are you babysitting again?” She asks as the two of you walk and you huff, rolling your eyes.
“Not this weekend Lena, the boys are going to their dads and it’s a bit more than babysitting at this point. I told you that.” Lena laughs.
“I’m messing with you. If they won’t be there this weekend you should convince this hot milf you’re banging to join us.” You punch Lena giving her a dead arm as she hisses in pain. “Fuck jeez I can’t even joke with you about it.” 
“Yes because you know I actually like her Lena. It’s not just about banging the hot mom next door.” You remind her and she smiles, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. 
“I know, so convince her so we can all meet her.” You roll your eyes.
“I doubt she’ll want to Lena. I’m sure her party days are over and done with, besides she can’t even drink.” You mention off handedly.
“Why not?”
“She’s pre-“ You stop yourself realizing you didn’t mention before that Wanda is currently pregnant and you’re banging her. Let's just add that to your list of kinks as Lena’s eyes widen. “Don’t. Lena. Fuck. Stop! Don’t look at me like that!” She has this shit eating smirk on her face. 
“Look at you like what detka? Like you’re totally into older milf’s who are also pregnant and that’s why none of us could ever dream of getting you off? Did I forget anything?” You don’t dare tell Lena that she calls you Daddy when the two of you fuck. 
“That’s it I’m gonna murder you and I’ll make it look like a goddamn accident Lena.” You say through gritted teeth.
“Fine, fine! I give! I won’t mention it, but if she says no at least let me meet her? I do actually care if she’s treating you right and not just using you.”
“She would never Lena...she’s incredibly sweet and kind and caring and loving and....” Lena starts making gagging noises. “Why do I even bother?” You start walking ahead of her. As she scrambles to catch back up and apologize, but, you decide to ignore her.
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“Hey Wands?” You ask as she makes dinner, the boys occupied in the living room by TV and video games. 
“Yes pretty girl?” She flicks her eyes to you as she prepares vegetables for a roast she’s making.
“I got invited to a party on Friday,” Wanda nods, listening as you speak, but concentrating on the vegetables she’s cutting. “and my best friend Lena said since the boys are going to Vis’s this weekend that we should both go...I know it’s a college party and I’m sure you have no intent in partying with any of us, but my friends want to meet this mysterious woman I always talk about,” You feel your face heat up, “I told Lena you probably wouldn’t want to go, so if you don’t want to that’s fine and we can-“
“Is it important to you?” She cuts me off.
“I mean you meeting my friends is important, but it doesn’t have to be the party Lena said-“
“Then we can go to the party.” She cut you off again, but you're surprised by her answer so much that you can’t even be mad. 
“You want to meet my friends?” You ask, tilting your head, eyebrows knit in confusion as Wanda stops what she’s doing, moving around the island to stand between your legs, resting her arms on your shoulders.
“Of course I do sweet girl. I want to be a part of your life. Every part of it and that includes meeting your friends even if it’s some college party and I haven’t partied since I was your age sweet girl.” She kisses you tenderly and the boys make noises at us. 
“Go back to your show boys. Mommy’s busy.” Wanda gives them a look and the boys giggle. We had told them yesterday morning about us after what had happened the previous night. You laugh with the boys and eventually so does Wanda.
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Wanda wears a green off the shoulder frilled and layered dress that falls to her mid thigh. You look her over and before she can even say anything as she looks herself over in the mirror You come up behind her, wrapping your arms just under her belly which the dress hides nicely as she decided she didn’t want your friends other than Lena you told her you had accidentally let it slip. Wanda wasn’t mad thankfully. 
“You look amazing beautiful girl.” You kiss her neck, her hair is flowing in waves over her shoulders and her make-up is impeccable. 
“You think so?” 
“I know so. I’m looking at you and it kind of makes me wanna skip the party and just fuck you all night with my cock.” You whisper in her ear. 
“Mmmm don’t threaten me with a good time.” She turns around, kissing you gently, not wanting to smudge her lipstick. You see her look over your outfit, you have decided to wear black skinny jeans, a white crop top and a cropped leather jacket that just barely falls past your tits. Your hair is down and straightened and you've got your knee high lace-up boots that have these little chains hanging off them. 
“Mmmm pretty girl Mommy wants you so bad.” She bites her lip as she looks you over. You pull her chin up to meet your eyes. 
“Behave yourself and you can ride Daddy’s cock until you see stars when we get home.” She simple nods and smiles. “Good girl. Grab your purse and let’s go.”
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You hold Wanda’s hand as you get inside, music blaring people drinking and doing drugs. You're offered a joint by some girl. You think she’s in your language class or maybe networking either way you smile, taking a long drag as you feel Wanda’s hand squeeze yours, pulling your attention to her. You're reminded that you've never smoked in front of her. It’s something you tend not to do, but when it’s offered you usually take it. 
You hand it back to the girl and give a quick thank you as you find your group of friends in Stark’s basement where there are pool tables that people are playing at including your friends except for Lena. 
“Hey guys!” You speak cheerfully as you see the three of them playing a game of pool. Peter, MJ, and Kate all look at you and smile as you hug each of them asking Kate where Lena is, who is currently grabbing drinks and shots for all of you. You nod and introduce Wanda to them,
“Guys this is Wanda. We’ve been kind of seeing each other all summer. Well not exactly all summer, but we met at the beginning of summer when I moved in.” You start rambling and Wanda stops you by squeezing your hand.
“It’s nice to finally meet you all. I know Y/N here has told me you guys always invited her out, but she’s been turning you down because of me and I feel bad about taking up all her time, but she’s been a big help, She wraps her arms around your arm and You can feel her belly and her tits against you. You wanna melt into a puddle from the feeling as the conversation goes on without you.
“Okay who is ready for some drinks!?” Yelena calls out and Wanda snaps her head at the voice.
“Yel?” Wanda asks and Lena is looking at Wanda wide eyed.
“Oh hey Wands so you’re the one taking up my best friend's time!” Yelena walks over hugging Wanda like they’re old friends. 
“Am I...am I missing something?” You ask, dumbfounded.
“Well if you had ever said her name I would have known you were dating Tasha’s best friend! Wow! This is crazy!” You punch Yelena once again giving her a dead arm. “Ah! Stop doing that! It hurts!” Yelena hissed, shaking her arm trying to get feeling back as quickly as she could. 
“Tasha as in your big sister Nat? Natty? Natty bear?” Kate asks listing off literally every nickname we’ve ever given to her older sister.
“Yes! That Tasha!” You say and huff.
“Pretty girl it’s okay. Everything is fine.” Wanda reassures me as You lean your forehead against her temple,
“I need a drink...” You whimper to Wanda. 
“Go have one it’s okay if you drink. Just because I can’t doesn’t mean you need to stop yourself.” You smile and pull her in for a kiss. You go over to the table that Lena put the drinks down at noticing she still brought over six shots and six beers, well bottoms up. You take one shot after the other of the vodka Lena had brought the clear liquid burning and setting your stomach a blaze then popped the top on the beer bottle, using the table to take off the top as you start drinking it, looking back as Yelena and Wanda talk the others getting involved. 
You smiled though it was a turn of events. You weren't expecting your girlfriend to be getting along with all of your friends just fine and it didn’t matter that she’s ten years older than us, or that she has kids, or that she’s pregnant. She’s just Wanda right now. You move back over, feeling the buzz start from drinking and smoking, wrapping myself around Wanda from behind; kissing her neck. The other four were playing pool, talking with us in between turns and eventually we played a round of cut throat so we could all get involved. 
A few hours later you were floating in the clouds. All giggling from drinking. Wanda says the goodbyes for you two and how nice it was to meet everyone, taking your keys as the two of you approach the car, “I’m driving sweetie, go get in your passenger princess spot.” Wanda teases, making you giggle. 
“Jokes on you beautiful I like being passenger princess.” You tell her. “I hate driving sometimes. This is so much better.” You get comfy in your seat, closing your eyes after you've buckled in. As she starts driving you two home, she puts her hand on your thigh as you connect your phone to Bluetooth, putting on, Dove Cameron’s album Alchemical: Volume 1, skipping to the song Sand.
“I love hearing you sing pretty girl.” Wanda says squeezing your thigh, keeping her eyes on the road. You had your eyes on her the whole time you sang and she knew it.
“I’m not a great singer.”
“But you sing with your heart. So it’s beautiful.” Wanda assures me, making me smile. 
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By the time the two of you got home you were feeling better. Though you still took the water from Wanda that she grabbed from the fridge. You sat up on the counter while you drank it as Wanda grabbed something small to reheat from earlier in the week. You watched her practically dance around the kitchen, humming a tune from the music you had playing in the car. She was absolutely beautiful.
“Wands?” You call out. When she looks over at you, your arms are outstretched, hands reaching for her. She smiled walking over to you and settling between your legs. Her arms wrapped around your waist and your own wrapped around her shoulders. 
“Is this what you need, sweet girl?” Wanda's voice is muffled against your chest. You give her a small ‘Mmm’ into her hair. “I love you being Daddy, but it's okay when you need to be all soft like this. I still love you like this.” You knew how needy you could be at times, especially when you'd been drinking. You kiss the top of her head and take a moment to just breathe her in and cherish the moment.
“I know. I just prefer it. I can be myself with you Wands and it's all I've ever given you.” She looks up at you with a smile, getting up on her tiptoes to kiss you.
“Good.” You smile into the kiss. You try to lick her lip, to keep going, but she stops you. “Ah. Food first then we can have our fun.” You subconsciously let out a whine in displeasure. Wanda smirks, whispering in your ear, “Behave and do as Mommy says sweet girl.” You felt your eyes roll back as your stomach flipped. 
Wanda had such an effect on you, sober or not. Usually you were able to overpower her; take the situation and flip it, but it was obvious to you that she wanted to win at some point. So you listened to her, even letting her feed you. You knew it made her happy. The smile on her face was as wide as ever. You knew Wanda loved being a mom, loved taking care of those around her.
-----------------------------------------------
“F-fuck…” You moaned out as Wanda's tongue buried it's way inside of you. She'd already had you cum once, but you were even more needy than either of you had anticipated. You never let others touch you, but Wanda made you feel like you were on fire. Your hand tangled in her hair, hips rocking against her face as you moaned out, “Fuck…cumming…ahhh…” You bit your lip, feeling her tongue lap inside of you as you came down from your high.
Wanda crawled back up, after cleaNing you with her tongue. She leaned down to kiss you, tasting yourself on her lips. A moan slipped past your lips before flipping the two of you over carefully. 
“My turn to make you feel good Mommy.” You leaned back down, kissing her. “I promised you my cock didn't I?” You saw Wanda's eyes light up, she'd been waiting for it. As you got up to put the strap on you looked over her body. Letting your eyes rake over her form, admiring it as you crawled up between her legs. “You are so fucking beautiful. I swear no one could even come close to you.” You told her as you slowly slid inside of her. A quiet moan slipped out as you leaned over her. “Look at Daddy while she fucks you.” Wanda's eyes locked with yours as you started your thrusts. 
Slow and steady at first listening to every little noise she made because of you. Watching her body move beneath you. Everything about it was beautiful, perfect. Nothing to you was better than this. Nothing was better than what you two had built over the summer. Nothing was better than the family you've found.
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lttl3babybug · 7 months
Note
Are you okay with people 18+ interacting? Do you do Hazbin Hotel requests
If so can you do headcanons or a fic about Alastor with a little who accidentally summoned him to Earth
@babiegurlmuffin
I am a-okay with people 18+ interacting as long as they’re here for complete sfw reasons and have a sfw account as I am still a minor myself! Thank you for asking sweetheart :3
Of course I can write that for you! You’re my first hazbin request! (Even tho I posted a stimboard before this, this has been sat in my request box for like 2 weeks now) How exciting!! Hope you like this!!
Crayon scribbles
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Your day had been terrible to put it lightly, too loud, too bright, too much. So when you could retreat home to your little space god were you ecstatic, the calming hues of your room immediately setting your mind at ease. Between the pacifier between your lips and your comfiest outfit on you were ready for a relaxing night.
It was all going so smoothly, laying on the floor while an old Disney cartoon played on your laptop and cuddled up to an old deer plush. Red crayon in hand, happily doodling away until it started to burn, dropping it out of instinct. “Huh…” you mumble, maybe it was hand cramp. Attempting to pick it up again, once again you heard the singe of the paper as if touched your skin. This time it was accompanied by the loud static of ah old radio and a bright red light coming from your paper. Scrambling away, plushie in hand you watched as a figure formed at the centre of the light. Then it all stopped. And he was there.
“Pleasure to make your acquaintance! I am Alastor, the radio demon, although I assume you knew that since you summoned me! Now how may I be of assistance?”
The large smile plastered across his face wasn’t helping the immense fear you felt, tears burning in your eyes as he held his hand out for you to shake, “Why are you here?” Your voice came out small and weak, cowering away from the self proclaimed ‘Radio Demon’ standing in the middle of your bedroom.
He bent down to meet your gaze, scanning your scared expression. “You don’t…know who I am?” he asked with a confused laugh. The radio filter over his voice wavering momentarily, you shook your head clutching the deer close to you. “Well, that makes things a lot more complicated doesn’t it?” He stood upright once again, pulling you with him.
“Whatever is going on here?” Alastor raised an eyebrow and prodded a few of your drawings and stuffies with his cane, a confused expression written across his face as he did so. He eyed up the pacifier in your mouth and hummed lightly, “aren’t you a little too old for that?” He mused, a smirk on his face. You shook your head, “No…no sir, I don’t think so”. You sounded so scared, so confused. It was almost getting to him. Almost. The picture of innocence stood before him, having accidentally summoned him with simple crayon scribbles. Well he couldn’t not play along! Tilting your chin up with his index finger and examining your features, “how old are you my dear?”
Such an innocent question, such a complex answer. “…4” you’d mumble past the pacifier, then it clicked in him. He’d seen this before in a few of his acquaintances at the hotel, “Why of course! How could I be so silly to think you were anything but I little fawn, well aren’t you just darling” he’d changed his demeanour quite rapidly. Pinching your cheek and straightening out your outfit so it sat right. This was new…and strange, but it felt right. Watching him fuss over you while he led you towards your bed, sitting down on it and patting the spot beside him and not knowing why, you sat next to him.
“My my, someone’s had quite the big day haven’t they?” He hummed, turning to to face him, “and what’s this one’s name?” He asked politely pointing towards your stuffed deer, “…’s called Lena” you mumbled from behind your pacifier. He hummed in content before looking around and spotting your laptop on the floor, “Hm, I see your a fan of those noisy screens.” A sense of distaste in his voice, you watched as he closed the laptop screen with his cane and pushed it to the side. “You’ll be having none of that while I’m here little one, just good old fashioned radio” Alastor proudly declared, standing up and tapping his cane on the floor.
That horrible scratchy static returned until he bonked it once again, it started playing a calming melody. He ruffled your hair and laid you down in your bed, tucking you in under your fleece blankets the music soothed you. It helped you forget your worries of today, helped you forget how scary everything was moments ago when he’d just appeared in your room. Now here he was, humming you a soft tune and sending you off to sleep. “Rest well little fawn. You know where to find me if needed…”
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demonicbaby666 · 8 months
Text
The Couch
One shot | Supergirl Masterlist | Masterlists
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Fandom: Supergirl
Pairing: Supercorp
Genre: Fluff and eventual smut
Words: 4.3k+
Warnings: 18+, minors DNI, Kara being an absolute cutie ig, fingering, oral sex, overstimulation (it's unintentional)
Summary: Just two friends casually sleeping together far too regularly on a worn-out couch. What could go wrong?
A/n: She’s not perfect, but it’s been a month and I desperately needed to get something out there! Promise to be more on my writing game. Also a big thank you to my wife @hotchscvm for being my beta reader and hyping me up <3
The first time was an accident. After too many potstickers (on Kara's part) and too many pages read from her spell book (on Lena's part), they'd ended up on the couch, dozing side by side. In retrospect, it was late, and while staying up to spend more time with each other sounded like a good idea, it probably would have been a better idea to host the impromptu feast at one of their apartments. But that is neither here nor there because the fact still remained: they'd always feel so at home with each other that falling asleep on concrete would probably come as easy as it would a plump mattress. 
Sometime in the night, Lena had managed to topple over on her side, taking her best friend down with her, and either Kara was too exhausted to care or too sleepy to notice because the half-arsed excuse of a cuddle was taken in kind with one muscled arm slipping around a curved waist. Kara had never shied away from intimacy, especially with Lena, but as she groggily slung her arm around her best friend, happily snuggling into her fragrant neck, the beginnings of something very not platonic began tampering away in her chest. It all felt daunting, yet wonderfully and irrefutably natural. 
Everything was all well and good for a while. They both slept better than they had in weeks. That was until a few hours later, when the sun had just started to peak over neighbouring spires, and the pair rose from their sleep to discover the true meaning of back pain. Of course, neither pointed out that if they had gone home rather than finished the duration of their uncomfortable slumber in each other's embrace, the agony would have been much more manageable. Still, once again, this was never mentioned. Instead, Lena took to teasing Kara about the drool drying at the corner of her mouth, and Kara's rebuttal was to mention the bird's nest atop Lena's head.
The second time was a week later when Kara returned from a nightly patrol to find Lena snoozing alone. The brunette had taken advantage of the couch's full length; her legs bent to accommodate the sparse leg room, and she had a cushion wedged under her head that had definitely seen better days. Other than that, Kara was reasonably convinced Lena seemed comfortable. Kara did try not to stare, but after minutes spent wandering about and trying to find something to do, and there definitely was bound to be something if she was actually looking as hard as she had convinced herself she was, Kara relented and returned to Lena. 
She watched as the brunette's chest rhythmically rose and fell, how her mouth was slightly parted to allow tiny sighs to tumble out, and couldn't help but smile as her chest warmed at the sight of the way Lena had her arm flung over her forehead, hand flying over the side of the couch. It was a sign, Kara recognised, that meant Lena was, for once, having a rested sleep rather than the usual - broken and fragmentary. That was why she told herself she didn't wake her or risk it by flying her home. There was nothing selfish about it. In fact, she was being selfless by relishing the notion she was probably one of the very few people who got to see Lena that way - open and bare, not always on guard or the look for any sign of danger. Of course, Kara saw glimpses of it when they were together, but it was rare. So, getting to truly see Lena when she was so unguarded was remarkable in Kara's eyes. 
It felt right when she walked over and knelt beside the roughspun fabric of the couch to get a closer look, like there was some injustice to picking out the details of such a pretty picture from afar that had been corrected. Now, if it had been anyone else, Kara would have worried her behaviour was bordering on creepy. Still, it was Lena, her Lena, and simply listening to that strong, steady heartbeat warmed Kara's chest. It quieted all the clattering and commotion of National City. The conversations, the arguments, the music, the car engines, everything fell silent to Lena's familiar heartbeat, and Kara would be damned to ever apologise for finding calm in that, so she continued to watch. That, she could admit, was selfish. 
As much as sleep may dull one's senses, Lena was becoming keenly aware she wasn't alone. Usually, her first instinct would be to fight, but when she blinked her eyes open and was met with the human version of a golden retriever, she couldn't help but smile sleepily. 
"Hi," Kara whispered, placing both knuckles under her chin and continuing to stare with childlike wonder sparkling in her eyes. 
"Hi," Lena replied weakly. Only she found she was not weak from sleep or the dull ache in her cramped legs. She was weak from the way Kara was staring. It made her feel naked and exposed like she was on trial for the crime of being known and still loved. She saw it in those blue eyes - pure adoration and devotion, and it terrified her how Kara could look at her like that when she'd seen her at her worst, when she'd hurt Kara in unforgivable ways and carried the same genes as people who damn near wanted her dead. 
She was weak for losing herself in the blue whirls of her best friend's eyes, the golden flecks that circled her pupils - yet another thing that made her seem unreal. Her fingers twitched as she mentally traced the little scar by Kara's left eyebrow, wanting desperately to reach out and feel the mark of a distant memory from Krypton. Lena thought better of it, knowing the intimacy of the act would mean stepping into dangerous territory. Instead, she shuffled to the side, cramming herself against the back of the couch and extending a silent invitation, one Kara understood immediately, and if her joyous smile was anything to go by, she was more than happy to accept. 
Kara lay flat on her back, staring up at the ceiling and trying not to think of how good it felt to have the warmth of Lena's body so close. After a few minutes in her log-like position, she cautiously raised an arm in question. The proximity between them was nil, so what was the damage in being a little closer? Her bravery was instantly rewarded with a weight falling on her chest and a slim finger tracing the raised fabric along her chest. And as many a time before, everything around her, except Lena, ceased to exist, and Kara found herself lulled by the steady thrum of a familiar heartbeat. 
The third time, Kara told herself, it was completely and utterly necessary. Suppose she didn't comfort Lena when she felt like utter shit. It would quite literally be the end of the world. She was sure of it. Solely because of that, Kara hunted the brunette down, finding her in a dimly lit room, a set of fresh tears trickling slowly down her cheeks. A series of angry lines marked Lena's blanched cheeks rouge, the colour of heartbreaking remembrance. There was a distinct look in her eyes, resembling a wounded pup. Only Lena had never been helpless like one. She'd been alone the majority of her adult life, fighting. And she'd come out the other end stronger for it; that was undeniable, but what would always remain were the chronic wounds of her hardships. 
Kara remained in the doorway, unsure her presence would be welcome. The more she saw, the heavier her chest felt. The details were the worst: the way Lena clasped her hands so tightly together, yet they still shook, the glossed-over sheen to her eyes, the way her jaw shook with each silent cry, and most of all, the raw hiccups that only Kara could pick up, wearing away at Lena's throat every time she tried to keep herself quiet. 
Clearing her throat, Kara lightly padded over. The brunette's mind was so far away that by the time Kara was crouching down and delicately separating her woven hands, taking each within her own, she'd just about registered that she was no longer alone looking with puffy eyes. Kara tried to offer a sympathetic smile, but it was excruciatingly painful when the woman she adored radiated so much pain she felt within herself, too. She was helplessly searching her mind for something to say, anything that could encompass what Lena was feeling or take it all away, but she knew nothing in her vocabulary could. 
Kara got to her feet, taking Lena with her. There was no complaint. Lena simply complied, no energy left in her to fight, no reason to fight someone wholly trusted. She let herself be taken from one room and led into another, her mind turned off and tuned only to how soft the hand guiding her forward felt - how it was already calming her racing pulse. 
"Do you want to talk about it?" Kara asked, sitting down on the far side of the couch, encouraging Lena to join her by keeping their hands clasped. Lena followed willingly, though she kept quiet, staring at the margin between the couch cushions, each frayed piece of string taking her interest individually. 
Kara gave Lena a once over, this time honing into every detail as quickly as possible so Lena didn't feel uncomfortable. She noticed a handful of things: the shine to Lena's hair was no longer there, and her perfume was only vaguely present, but what Kara saw first was the darkened ring under Lena's swollen eyes, and that's when she gathered what had been happening. 
"It's the nightmares again, isn't it?" Kara quietly asked, squeezing Lena's hand once, twice, and holding tight to show this was in no way an invasion of privacy but a rope for the brunette to take so Kara could help pull her out of the pit she'd fallen into. A tiny whimper confirmed her guess, and that's when Kara took action. She ignored Lena's creased brow when she untangled their hands, scootched closer, looped her arms around Lena's waist and hauled her onto her lap. It was a risky move, given that this was most definitely not the most platonic position. However, any fear and regret instantly faded when she heard a sigh and felt Lena's head nestle into her neck. She held her tight and let Lena take whatever she needed from the embrace. Gently, Kara used one hand to brush through chestnut hair, keeping one hand around a slim waist. Emboldened by Lena's willingness, Kara lowered her head, turned it to the side, and kissed her barely visible cheek. 
"Can we stay here tonight?" Lena finally whispered, and Kara's whole body responded in kind, buzzing in anticipation. 
"Of course," she replied into the silky softness of Lena's hair. She breathed in, knowing before the exact scents that would coax their way through her airways, only to erupt into a swarming storm in her stomach - herbal shampoo complemented by nodes of bittersweet honey tea, the kind you'd drink when trees began to lose their leaves and your body hadn't yet adjusted to the drop in temperature. "Whatever you need, Lee, I'll do it."
"You, Kara Zor-el, are my hero, not Supergirl, you," Lena pulled back to confess, her worn-out eyes glinting in low light as she stared intently, watching Kara's eyes gaze right back. They stayed staring for seconds, a minute; neither knew. They simply accepted that it didn't feel wrong, it didn't feel awkward, it felt safe and warm, like coming back home after a trainwreck of a day or seeing the sun finally peak from behind the rainclouds. 
Finally, Lena ducked back down and allowed herself to let go, wetting Kara's neck with a fresh set of tears. 
After that, it became a weekly occurrence, then bi-weekly, tri-weekly and well, then they didn't bother trying to count how many times a week they found excuses to fall asleep in each other's arms. The couch grew new additions that no one mentioned but thoroughly enjoyed: a luxuriously soft blanket folded neatly over the side, a kitschy cushion from Kara's apartment and new upholstery. Neither spoke of their shared nights, not even with each other. It became taboo, a dirty secret between two willing participants. They both knew that, for one reason or another, they were crossing boundaries, leading them into dangerous territory. However, not acknowledging it seemed enough to fend off the intrusive thoughts. 
After a particularly long day at the tower, Kara and Lena found themselves in the same place they had always wound up in when everyone had left. Their limbs entangled, and their bodies so close Lena was essentially lying atop Kara, with her head comfortably nestled on the blonde's chest. Usually, the pair would find sleep quickly enough, but something was different that night. Sleep didn't come so easy, with the day's events weighing heavy. 
"What are you thinking about," Kara asked, breaking the comfortable quietude.
Lena didn't have to think twice before answering, "How I never want to lose you." 
There were a few bouts of silence. Kara let Lena's words sink in before speaking again, "What do you mean?" 
"Every day, you go out and protect the people of this world, even if it means risking your own life." Lena mindlessly played with the collar of Kara's sweater, trying to casualise the severity of what she was saying. Kara could sense the tension brewing in Lena and began to draw soothing circles up and down her back. 
"It's who I am, Lee. My powers mean I can help people; it's my duty to do so," Kara sighed, pressing her lips to Lena's head. 
"I know. But I just worry I won't see you fly back through the tower doors, that I won't be able to do enough to help you, and I'll lose the only person that's ever seemed to," she paused, the l word anxiously sitting on her tongue. "That I'll lose the one person who has always stood by me. It's selfish, I know." 
A tidal wave of emotions washed over Kara. She stayed motionless for at least a minute, processing all Lena had said, and failed to say. 
"Lena, look at me," she ordered. 
They were both helplessly reminding themselves that this is what friends do: they're allowed to cuddle, they're allowed to fall asleep together, and they're allowed to feel like they complete each other in a way no one else probably could. The pure definition of slumber parties is deep conversations where confessions are made, so of course, this is all normal and strictly platonic and nothing more. Except when their eyes met, the look they shot at one another was anything but friendly. It was desperate and demanding, taking all the oxygen out of the room and leaving them breathless. Kara could hear Lena's heartbeat, frantic, from anticipation, excitement, or fear, she didn't know. 
"I will never leave you. I'm not going anywhere." 
"You can't promise me that." 
Kara cupped Lena's cheeks in her palms, gently holding her still, "You're right, I can't, but I can promise that I will always fight to come back home to the people I love– to come back to you." Her eyes flickered between Lena's eyes and lips. "I love you, Lena."
"You don't have to say that," Lena choked out. 
"I meant it," she stated in a hushed voice, eyes firmly planted on soft lips. "Lena, come here." 
"Kara," Lena pleaded in a weak whisper, battling the fuzzy feeling that was stirring beneath her fingertips. Lena could scarcely breathe, her throat constricting with each passing second because Kara was looking at her the same way she always did, and she was so very weak to stop herself from looking back and letting the air be stolen from her lungs. Kara pulled her closer until their lips were a hair's width away, and then she chose to wait. Her intentions were clear, but she knew it had to be Lena who would make the final move. And she did. Lena closed the minimal space between their lips, ignoring the rapid pace of her thudding heart. As expected, Kara's lips were perfect, acceptant to let Lena take the lead and demanding nothing in return. 
Soon enough, both got lost in the delicacy of a slow makeup session. Kara made a great effort to reign in her zeal, only encouraging Lena with a slide of her hands down to a supple waist and aiding the brunette atop her when she heard no protest. The two found themselves upright, Lena's knees cocooning Kara's hips, their core pressed against one another enough to raise their body temperatures. With the slide of the super's tongue along a plump lip and the compliant opening of the brunette's mouth, their slow and tempered kiss tilted more towards eager and desperate. Kara had scarcely noticed her hands sliding down to grip Lena's ass. She wholly gave herself to instinct and desire, guiding Lena back and forth in a grinding motion. 
"Kara," Lena moaned, throwing her head back and struggling to hold herself still when Kara instantly went to suckle at her neck. "Not here. Take me home." 
The blonde didn't need to be told twice; she hauled herself up, taking Lena with her, and allowed the other woman's feet to briefly touch the ground before she picked her up bridal style and shot out the balcony doors. The city was bursting with life. Laughter echoed off every surface and bounced up into the night sky. The noise sought to pollute Kara's senses, yet the blonde didn't even have to try to fight off the background noise because all she was focused on was Lena's smile, and her residing bouts of childlike laughter. It was perfection - holding Lena close, feeling her body heat against the crisp evening wind. 
All the withheld desire flooded their senses the moment they landed on Lena's balcony. Kara burst into the apartment, brain muddled with the ghostly feel of velvety lips all over her throat. She used her super speed to whisk them to the bedroom, gently placing Lena down and climbing atop her. 
"Hi," Lena whispered, searching Kara's eyes for regret or hesitation. 
"Hi." The super leaned down and pressed a small kiss to Lena's lips before pushing herself back up to hover and smile, ridding her best friend of any doubt. 
"Can I?" Lena asked, her hands under Kara's sweater, bunching the material between her palms. 
"Yes." But Kara didn't appear to have the patience for Lena's gentle touch as she yanked the offending garment over her head and ducked right back down to Lena's neck, lowering her lips to the birthmark that always looked so darn kissable and did just that. 
They set their tasks to removing articles of clothing, revealing more and more of themselves to each other, taking turns to stare awestruck before returning to the matter at hand. Kara took her sweet time unclasping Lena's bra if only to charge to the impending reveal she'd been waiting years for. 
"Beautiful," Kara whispered, eyes fixed on Lena. "You're perfect."
She didn't let the brunette get a word in, not that Lena stood a chance when lips had already surrounded her pert nipple and a tongue darted out to move in tight circles. Kara was ravenous. She moved from breast to breast at lightning speed, giving each the full treatment until Lena was mewling and cantering her hips. It was when she felt the slickness of need touch her stomach that Kara ventured south. With each methodical kiss, Kara shuffled lower and lower, finally arriving and comfortably settling herself between creamy thighs. 
Contrary to Kara's expectations, Lena was not fighting to be in charge. She allowed Kara to play around and find what got the most promising reactions. However, it seemed to be less trial and error and more constantly hitting the nail on the head because after what must have only been half a minute, Lena was practically writhing, and Kara was all but lost in the rich, sharp tastes coating her tongue. She'd found her pace and her pattern, starting with slow, pointed licks to Lena's clit, occasionally running the stiff muscle down to drive into her sopping cunt before moving back up and taking the bundle of nerves into her mouth and lathering it with the flat of her tongue. Kara kept this up, falling in love with all the ways Lena would respond: her low-pitched moans, her bucking hips, the way her thighs would clamp around Kara’s head when she used the heel of her foot to urge the blonde closer. It was heaven, and Kara never wanted it to end. 
She was vaguely aware Lena was reaching her peak, the hand in her hair tightening, fingers coiling locks of hair in a firm grip. It spurred her on. Kara only moved faster, messily lapping up every inch of Lena's pussy until the brunette sprung up from the bed and let out a cry. Kara was greedy, though; she slowed down, gently lapping up the mess left behind, only to devour Lena all over again. From the moment Kara heard the sounds Lena unleashed when she entered her with two fingers, she was a goner. All she knew was Lena's sweaty body, her accelerated heartbeat, the clamping around her fingers and the harmonious cries of pleasure. She kept going and going. Harder. Faster. 
"Kara," Lena whimpered, her breathing heavily laboured and her heart pounding. She used her grip on Kara's hair to pry her away. "You've got to stop."
"Are you okay?" Kara reeled back to ask. She scanned Lena once over, fear evident in her eyes. "Did I hurt you?"
"No! No, of course not. You just made me cum four times in a row, darling. I think I may pass out if you keep going." Lena seemed dazed but happily so as she stared down lovingly at Kara. She used her remaining strength to guide the blonde back up and capture her lips in an appreciative kiss, moaning at the taste of herself on her best friend's tongue. 
Lena bided her time. She waited to regain a steady heartbeat before she refocused her attention on the pressing matter that was the slick mess gathering on her thigh. Kara had - clearly - already begun working herself up. Whether or not the needy grinding was intentional, Lena didn't know, but she knew she wanted to be the one to give Kara her release, not have the blonde get off on her thigh. She guided Kara back and forth till she deemed her sufficiently distracted, and only then did she turn the tables, flipping the super on her back with surprising strength. 
"My turn," Lena devilishly smirked. 
She effortlessly slid three fingers into Kara and began thrusting in and out with reckless abandon. The blonde had no chance. Her head crashed back into soft pillows, her body burst to life, and her skin birthed a litany of pebbly goosebumps. It was like nothing she'd experienced before. Unlike previous times, this felt like it was finally for her. Kara didn't have to fake the appreciative sounds coming from her mouth. She didn't have to direct Lena on what to do. She was free to lie back and take all that was given. And Lena was more than happy to provide. 
The brunette had her lips glued to Kara's neck, adamant about marking her impenetrable skin, and though she may have been failing miserably, there was no mistaking Kara's moans for anything but satisfaction. So she kept going. With her mission still in sight, Lena eased herself down on her elbow, alleviating some of the pressure from her hand and placed her thumb over Kara's clit. The position was awkward, but Lena did her best to trace figures of eight over and around Kara's sensitive bud - knowing she immensely enjoyed the action herself - and was rewarded instantly when she felt Kara's body tense up and shake. 
"Lena," Kara moaned. Her hands were wound in the bedsheets, knuckles blanched from the force of her grip. She sounded so desperate, so fragile, that Lena had to bite her tongue to stop herself from moaning.
"I know," Lena replied, rising back on her palm to gaze at Kara's sheer beauty in this delirious state. She delicately brushed stray hairs off Kara's face, staring deep into her eyes, and ever so slightly smiled. "Let go, baby." 
~~~
"You're staring," Lena sighed, turning over and using her palms to rub sleep from her eyes. She’d expected some sort of embarrassment to tint Kara's face. Instead, she was met with a cheeky smile and a raised eyebrow. 
"I know," Kara said in a sure voice, her gaze unmoving, and suddenly, Lena felt like she was on fire all over again. The vivid events of the previous evening, still very fresh in her mind, were of no help. 
"Oh." Her cheeks were burning, and there was no doubt with her pale skin Kara could see. So Lena did what she could; she hid her face in Kara's side. "If you maybe wanted to stop, I wouldn't be opposed."
She vaguely heard Kara's laugh, but she'd become one with the small between the blonde's side and her forearm that everything was muffled. That was rectified when she was swiftly slumped onto her back, and whisps of golden hair tickled her cheeks from above. 
"I don't want to stop," Kara whispered. Innocence slowly vanished from the back-and-forth gaze, replaced with dark curiosity and dangerous intent. Soon, Lena found herself incapable of not glancing at Kara's pillowy lips that seemed to be inching closer. "Roa, I never want to stop staring at you."
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goldenempyrean · 9 months
Text
Making Amends
« Day 18: Making Up »
« Pairing: Lena Luthor x Reader »
« Notes: sorry this is a little late, I’ve been busy and just needed a little time to polish it up! I’ll fix the title in the morning ;) »
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“Lena I don’t want to hear it!” You growled the words as your girlfriend tried to explain why she had been home so late. This wasn’t the first time it had happened. You knew how she struggled with communicating or losing track of her work sometimes but this was different. She had promised go be home on time. She had promised to share the evening together with you, like you’d planned. She had promised to make the anniversary of your relationship special.
It didn’t matter now anyway. The dinner you’d made sat untouched on the table, stone cold. You didn’t even want to hear her reasoning for being late. You already knew in at heart. She’d gotten caught up in her work and had simply forgotten. Thats how it always went.
In the tense silence that followed, Lena's eyes pleaded for understanding, but you couldn't bring yourself to soften. Frustration and disappointment lingered in the air, wrapping around both of you like an unwelcome shroud. As you stood there, the weight of unmet expectations pressed on your shoulders. The room felt like it was growing hotter. Getting smaller. Everything seemed to sway and swoon as your vision hazed in and you out of focus. You needed some fresh air and you needed it now.
You stormed out of the apartment, the door slamming shut behind you - not even bothering to grab a jacket. The cool night air hit your face, providing a momentary relief from the stifling tension inside. Your mind raced with a mix of anger, hurt, and confusion. As you walked the dimly lit streets, you found yourself at a nearby park, seeking solace under the stars. Looking up at the unknown was always something that relaxed you. The endless possibilities of space. At heart you knew it wasn’t Lena’s fault entirely. She’d come home exhausted just last week as a result of the stress work had been causing her but it just hurt when her work got in the way of your personal lives.
The distant rumble of thunder interrupted your thoughts, and as you looked up at the night sky, raindrops began to fall. The gentle drizzle soon turned into a steady rain, drenching you in seconds. The cool water on your face felt strangely soothing. It was a good kind of cold.
However even the rain seemed to turn on you as you shivered involuntarily and giving a reluctant sigh, you decided to finally head back home. The rain soaked through your clothes as you hurried back, each step feeling heavier than the last. By the time you reached your apartment, you were drenched and exhausted. The door creaked open, revealing the aftermath of your heated argument. It was quiet inside. Lena had most likely retreated to the bedroom into the bedroom. But you were unwilling to face the bedroom just yet, so instead you settled on the living room sofa. It wasn’t warm nor did you have a blanket but sneaking into the bedroom to grab a change of clothes wasn’t exactly something you were eager to do.
Instead you curled up on the sofa, trying to ignore the uncomfortable sensation of the wet clothes against your cold skin. Turning over you let your head fall onto one of the pillows and you shut your eyes, hoping to slip into a peaceful sleep.
The next morning, you awoke with a heavy head and a throat that felt like it had been scraped with sandpaper. The remnants of last night's argument lingered in your mind, but they were overshadowed by the unmistakable signs of an impending illness. Stupid rain. Stupid cold. Stupid lack of a jacket! With a groan, you dragged yourself out of the makeshift bed on the sofa, your body protesting every movement as forced yourself to get dressed for work.
Despite the creeping heat of an uncoming fever seeping through your body, you trudged into the DEO, determined to fulfill your responsibilities as a agent there.
Colleagues shot concerned glances your way, but you brushed them off with a forced smile. The familiar hum of the high-tech agency felt louder than usual, pounding against your throbbing head.
As you attempted to focus on your tasks, the overhead intercom crackled to life. "Agent Y/L/N, report to Director Danvers' office immediately," the stern voice echoed through the facility causing you to grumble in annoyance as you pushed yourself up stumbled towards Alex's office.
Upon entering, you found yourself friend sitting at her drsk, concern etched across her face. "You look terrible," she remarked, her voice a mix of sympathy and scolding. "I've already called Lena. She'll pick you up. You need to go home and rest. You can’t work like this.”
“Ale-“ You couldn’t even begin to sigh her name before you were interrupted with a rough throat scraping cough, “Why did you-“
She raised a stern eyebrow before pulling a bottle of water out from her drawer and sliding it over the desk towards you, “That’s exactly why. I’m not just telling you this as your boss but as your friend. You’re sick. You need to go home. This is not an option.” You knew Alex’s stern voice and this was definitely it. There really was no point arguing with her, she was the director after all.
Lena didn’t take long to arrive. Less than 10 minutes which was very impressive given the traffic at this hour. All it took was one look at you sitting slumped in Alex’s office, your exhausted drooping eyes looking up at her as a box of tissues sat open in your lap to make her heart melt.
Your girlfriend was by your side in an instant, concern etched across her face. "How did this happen?" She crouched down, brushing a gentle hand over your forehead, her keen eyes not missing the subtle way you tensed beneath her touch.
The weight of the previous night's argument lingered in the air, but the genuine worry in Lena's expression softened the edges of the tension between you. She spoke with a gentle tone, "You should have told me you weren't feeling well, darling. I hate seeing you like this."
You managed a weak smile, appreciating Lena's concern despite the strained circumstances. "I didn't want to bother you. Besides, we had enough on our plates with everything - last night - already."
Lena shook her head, her fingers brushing through your hair comfortingly. "You're never a bother to me. We're in this together, remember?" She glanced up at Alex, who had been pretending to make herself busy in order to not intrude on your conversation, "I'll take her home, Thanks for looking out for her."
Alex nodded, her stern facade softening. "Always. Now you two ake care of each other. And Y/N, don't come back until you're fully recovered. That’s an order. I’ll come round tomorrow to check in if you’re feeling up to it.” She smiled over at you.
Lena helped you up, offering a supportive arm as you made your way out of the DEO. The car ride home was quiet at first, both of you lost in your thoughts. Lena finally spoke, breaking the silence, "I'm sorry, Y/N. I know I messed up last night, and I should have been there for you."
You sighed, leaning your head against the car window. The cool glass working wonders to soothe your pounding temples. “I overreacted, Lena. It wasn't just about last night. It's this constant struggle with your work taking precedence over us. I miss us, Lena, and I just want to find a balance." You sniffled.
Lena's grip on the steering wheel tightened, and she took a deep breath. "I promise, Y/N, I'll make it up to you. We'll figure this out together. I love you, and I don't want us to keep hurting each other like this."
As she parked the car, you both sat in almost silence for a moment. The rain from the previous night was still pattering down, drumming against the windows as it filled the car with its steady thrum. Lena turned to you, her eyes sincere, "Let's take care of you first. We can talk about this more later, okay? You’re the most important thing to me right now and right now what you need to be is looked after. So that’s what I’m going to do.”
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