#so it couldnt have been alluding to that

[sophisticatedheart]

What do you mean. How long ago was this. Oh shiet I forgor both season 4 and 5 came out last year s4 started in january... erm I'm considering this storm bringer adaptation confirmation bc it was only last year

What was the meaning of putting chuuya in front of the old world sign in the s4 opening. What was the MEANING. It haunts me.

[squeakadeeks]

Fabric overview: Neoprene scuba

next up on my favorite fabrics is neoprene scuba! This is a newer fabric to me but once i started using it, i couldnt stop haha.

neoprene scuba is a polyester double knit fabric with a sponge-spacer in between that can vary in size from barely noticeable to 3mm or more. its sometimes referred to as spacer fabric as a result. the term "scuba" can be thrown around a lot, but it typically refers to a thick, double knit poly fabric. It will usually have stretch via the knit weave. (this is something to watch out for, consistency in labeling is worth making note of)

I love neoprene scuba for its ability to hold smooth, defined forms. the thickness is great for smoothing, and the spongey layer gives it a good, shapely body structure. plus the double knit weave creates a soft finish. because of these properties, its my #1 go to for cartoony costumes.

neoprene scuba is also great for bodysuits and form-fitting things as well due to its smoothing properties. I like it a lot for boot covers.

Typically the two main things i use scuba for are bodysuits and capes. Capes for the shape, bodysuits for the smoothing. also it doesnt fray much so I have on occasion left edges raw!

Things to watch out for: 1) as was alluded to, its not easy to shop for. because of the variation in sponge thickness, if youre buying online its not easy to tell if youre getting a thinner, standard double knit or a true spacer scuba. also the terms can be hard to track from neoprene, scuba, spacer, bonded wetsuit fabric, etc. it takes some footwork to find the right fabric. 2) by nature, its a stretch fabric and its not easy to make...unstretchy. this stretch can pose challenges for draping, especially on capes. 3) its heavy and its itchy. no surprise that twice the layers of fabric mean that it can get heavy fast, and the sponge layer is made of little polyester pokers that can irritate the hell out of skin. lining a bodysuit or finishing internal seams is a must. 4) neoprene isnt easy to top stitch. its like trying to top stitch marshmallow. i havent been able to top stitch neoprene in a way that doesnt create a rounded bump effect (which hey, you might even want depending on the application). 5) its a thick heavy fabric, so its another needlesnapper when sewing. also because the dual layers, pressing seams is not always easy. 6) sometimes it has a waterproof finish that makes paining hard, ive also had the sponge layer *literally* suck paint up when trying to airbrush it. (again, think about how applying watery paint to a sponge would go)

despite the downsides, its a fast favorite of mine. what it can do well, it does *so* well. its a special fabric thats akin to sewing with a thin layer of plush marshmallow (as as mentioned...pros and cons to that)

I get my neoprene fabric from big Z mostly, but its also offered at fabric wholesale direct and spandex world. jo anns also has some fascinating scuba suedes that im a big fan of as well. it has a price point between 9-20$ a yard.

[floshav]

want you so bad.

Peter Parker x fem! reader

summary: Peter likes Mj. You like Peter. Everyday is hell when they're both in each others vicinity and you're sitting right behind the madness. You're so close to professing your love for him but you keep it under wraps because it seems like an impossible feat.

Warnings: intense yearning, slight steamy scene, kissing, alluding to smut

He brings his hat down, pushing his fluffy bits of hair to flair out at the ends of his hat. You quirk your head to the side wondering who he was trying to hide from or who he saw. Yet it was no surprise to find that it was Mj.

She walked in with her curly, unruly hair which made her look so, so beautiful. The freckles which danced on her face making her glow and it made you jealous. Why did her natural beauty shine through more than your own? Why couldnt Peter see that in you. Why couldn't you see anything in yourself.

His eyes darted around the park outside your school and finally landed on you. You looked at him with a knowing expression.

"Don't need to play it cool Parker. The whole school can smell your crush from here." You smirk.

He scratches the back of his head and pretends like he doesn't know you till' he gives you a defeated look.

"Whatever you say y/n...." It only takes a few more moments before he breaks

He musters out a breathy whisper which you've heard a billion times before. "Is that really MJ?" Peter gravelly asked, hands at either side of his head, giving in to the fact that he was definitely head over heels for her.

You try to hold in a sigh, " Yes, Peter. It is MJ. For the hundredth time this week!" You yearn out, half joke half seriously.

Peters shoulder's tense up as a dorky smile carves his lips. "Is she looking our way? Or is her nerdy ass stuffed in a book." Peter asks with wide eyes. The eyes which you found so adorable, palpable yet so far from the personal touch of your own fingertips.

You slowly turned your head around to glimpse at the curly haired girl who was indeed lost in a book.

"Yea, shes reading her book." You say as you shoot Peter a tight smile and hate Mj for being the stereotypical mysterious girl. You Wondered if he could sense the hurt beneath you. Of course not. He was just a boy after all.

"I wonder how her long eyelashes feel against her eye bags as she slurs through the words. Or how the spine of the book feels as her soft fingers inch it to crack. Ugh, I just want to count every freckle on her beautiful face. Ya think she's ever thought of me before?" Peter began to ramble sweet nothings to himself as if you were giving him your utmost attention and not thinking about how stars practically lived in his eyes as he talked about her. How you wish he was talking about you.

You felt that familiar soul crushing, heart sinking feeling that you knew too well. The feeling that every boy you've ever liked has given you. The feeling of being so close yet so far away was the final blow.

He placed both his hands on either side of his face again and began to softly bite his lip as he giggled to himself stupidly.

"What're you thinking about Parker." You ask playfully trying to lighten the mood for yourself.

"Her lips... her eyes.... her hair." He smiled to himself so oblivious to the fact that every compliment he gave her was a dagger to your heart.

------------------

2 months

2 months pass and Peter has started talking to Michelle. Instead of walking past him, she smiles, she waves occasionally and has even said small hi's to him. The progress aches your yearning heart further into abyss but you ignore it anyway. Michelle has a new glow to her, she radiates beauty and the colour yellow ever since they started conversing. While you stay stagnant, radiating a plain old indistinguishable grey.

You're in Peters room, you two have just finished a major lego piece you've been putting off and the nights going great.

buzz

There goes your night you think to yourself.

Peter picks up his phone only to reveal his dorky smile again. Hes immediately stuck like glue and you hate it. You hate her. Even though you shouldnt, you couldnt care less.

You lay beside him as he smiles at his phone when in fact he should be smiling at you.

You snatch his phone and crush it, crush it to bits imagining it was Michelle jones, every bit of it Gone. gone to dust.

you snap out of your fantasy and return to see him stuck in her spiders web.

"Hey Peter" you coon

"Whats up?" He sets his phone aside and turns to face you.

Unknowingly you inch closer, and closer but the gap is barely noticeable.

Your eyes flicker down to his lips and you take in a breath. He notices the subtle gesture and his mind wanders.

"Have you ever wondered.." You trail off

"Wondered.....?" He repeated

"Wondered what it'd be like to.."

"to... kiss someone." You shyly whisper knowing you both haven't had your first kisses.

"I think it'd be amazing. Especially with someone you like. Imagine the feeling, the sparks flying. Just everything put into place." He says as he searches your eyes for a deeper meaning behind your facade.

"Yea... Someone you like." Your heart pounds solemnly at the thought that you'd never share your first kiss with your first love because he was tangled up in a love story of his own.

"Why'd you ask?"

"Just... felt like it."

----------------------------

a month passes since that conversation and you see Peters lips locked onto Mj's as they share soft kisses beside the vending machine. You should feel happy for him but he's all you've ever wanted and you've just lost him. You want to scream, shout, cry but you don't have it in you anymore. You just don't care.

Peter pulls away and Mj has a wide smile plastered on her face. Something you rarely ever see from her. Your mind wanders to what Peters lips would feel like. Soft.. Plush and warm. The wetness of lips on lips makes you aroused. The sounds he'd make if you did something a little more. He was seemed like the type you thought to yourself. The way his face would be so flushed after you'd litter him with affection and kisses. Him gaining more confidence as you went on. Mj watching on the side. You hadn't even realised a dampening form on your panties until you shifted around. You wanted him so so bad, but all you could do was watch from the side.

[mewwfr]

Oh my god, staff.....

This auraboa issue with the lore being (most likely) unintentionally racist is especially maddening to me, because the concept they seem to want to portray (based purely on the encyclopedia entry) is very similar to an OC I have, and so I can say with experience, it's incredibly difficult to convey! ESPECIALLY when you try to portray it inside a short story where you're cutting lines for word count (their forum reply mentioned they left out some lines to keep it short)

Instead of getting across the concept the encyclopedia entry seems to allude to, the short story just accidentally walks into like 10 racism rakes in a row and its truly agonizing for me to watch, knowing what i assume the actual lore's intent is.

encyclopedia quote: "Older generations of Auraboa existed in a constant state of communion with their fellows. They refer to this connection as The Loop. In this persistent state they perceive time and memory in a non-linear manner; their intertwined considerations for past and present events are such that it became difficult for a dragon outside The Loop to grasp the intentions of these ancient wyrms."

what seems to be the intention is that the auraboa are a hivemind that doesn't experience time the same way other dragons do- they experience past, present, and future all at once and thus cannot communicate well NOT because they have a different language, but because they aren't experiencing TIME ITSELF in the same fashion as the dragons! However, in practice, in the story, the auraboa seem to speak with words in the proper order, just haltingly, since otherwise the story itself couldn't work at all.

another encyclopedia bit: "The newest generation of Auraboa is not linked to The Loop in their waking hours. While they move through the world, they are less directly accessible and read as "silent" to Auraboa who are within the communal state. This disconnection has allowed the young Auraboa to experience time in a linear fashion, and with this new understanding they have begun to form connections with other species of dragon that have never before been possible."

The encyclopedia seems more clear about the Linear Time thing, and that being why they can actually communicate sensibly, but in the act of having a story where the older ones DO communicate with the outside dragons and get a point across, they've kind of not shown the reason why dragons and auraboa COULDNT communicate before! which is! a big thing!

If they'd implemented the auraboa speaking with everything in the wrong order instead of halting single words at a time, i feel like the intention would get across better. As it is, it just smacks them directly into the 'simple native' stereotype with a truly awful tripping into the 'having our kids be taught by outsiders' which is. a really wretched parallel, as many native people have spoken of the unimaginable violence of residential schools.

I feel like the encyclopedia entry Alone isn't nearly as awful (still not great, but not as bad) as the extremely poorly implemented story that managed to ddr dance onto a bunch of horrible tropes.

they were literally so bad at conveying the fact that the auraboa are a hivemind that is unmoored from time, that i see people misinterpreting the lore as auraboa having their own weird language that other dragons can't understand! there was not enough effort put into conveying the ideas they tried to convey, and what WAS put forward was literally chock full of the most unfortunate parallels physically possible.

[jubiilee13]

hi babes I saw you begging for requests for mike schmidt so I decided to send my own request to you… as cliche as it is, could you write an angsty misunderstanding fic where basically mike is over-working himself to death and barely making time for you and you think you did something wrong but it turns out mike was just tired af. It can be smut or fluff since I don’t know what you really like to write. Sorry if this request is bad I’m not good at asking for things😭😭

-anon

anon ily ty for the request 😻😻

this may be a lil bad bc I’m sick rn but I hope u still enjoy 🫶

warnings: tiny mention of blood, angst, angy mike, sad reader, alludes to a little smut at the end but yeah

lets just say for this abby is at a um... sleepover or smth idk i forgot to include her

didnt check this for grammatical errors so my bad if it sucks lmao

—

you and mike didn’t fight often

i mean you never really had reason to

but lately mike had been weird, he had been… distant.

mike often had his rough days, as did you, but this time was different.

every morning when he returned home instead of his usual warm embraces, you’d been receiving the cold shoulder, at most a few sentences spoken between the two of you before he dragged himself off to bed.

you were worried to say the least, you knew you had done nothing wrong, yet something in your gut made you wonder if you did.

so you decided today was the day you were going to talk to him about it.

boy was that a bad idea...

the moment mike stepped out of his bedroom he spotted you, anxiously fidgeting as your eyes met his own

"we need to talk mike" you mumble, clearly not looking forward to having this conversation.

mike rolls his eyes, "what y/n" he replies, attitude evident in his tone, yet the attitude is weak, and you note his face is just a bit paler than usual, the bags under his eyes more evident, something was off.

"whats been going on with us mike?" you ask, voice trembling "did... did i do something? you- you've been so distant..."

"its nothing y/n, stop worrying" he says with a scoff, and you bite your lip.

"mike you dont have to lie to me" you say softly, extending your hand out to him to soothe him.

Then something inside him snaps, that movement- that feeling. he couldnt take it.

"God damn it y/n i said nothing is wrong! you never listen! just leave me alone! you clearly only make things worse!" he cries out, and your body freezes.

"o-oh" is all you can say, retracting your trembling hand, clearly in shock

"o-okay um... um i-i'll leave you be..." you mumble under your breath, trying to hide your emotions until you were out of his sight.

you scurry away, biting your lip so hard it draws blood, and the moment you enter your bedroom the tears escape.

you shut the door behind you, leaning against it and sliding to your knees, hand reaching to cover your mouth to hide the sobs.

what had you done?

did you upset him?

is he gonna leave?

so many questions flooded your mind all at once

it was so overwhelming, all you wanted was him... but right now that was the one thing you couldnt have.

so you sat there, leaning against the door of your room for god knows how long.

eventually when no more tears could fall, you lead yourself to your bed, a bed that had been untouched for a few months now due to you always sleeping with mike, and after a few more shaky breaths, you slipped into a uneasy slumber.

As you slept, mike took himself for a drive, his hands gripping the steering wheel so hard his knuckles faded to white.

he was angry

he was tired

he just wanted to be home

it slowly started to dawn on him that upon his arrival home earlier, his anger had been misdirected.

he wasnt mad at you

he loved you

god- you just wanted to help

why couldnt he see that?

he lets out a shaky sigh, punching his steering wheel as he lets out a few grunts of anger (much to the dismay of the car infront of him)

he decides to leave you be for the time being, and he leads him self on down the winding road, until he comes across an empty parking lot.

he lets himself settle there for a while, staring into the dark abyss in front of him.

eventually he decides to call you, and when you dont pick up... he calls again.

and again.

and... again....

and 12 more times.

he was worried to say the least, what if you left him? what. if you didnt love him anymore?

after the final call he places his phone in his pocket, running a hand through his hair as he starts up the car again and heads home.

in the meantime you were at home, tossing and turning, unable to find a true sense of saftey in your own sheets and god was it horrible.

you didnt notice the buzzing of your phone, nor the vibration any time left another voicemaiil.

so you lay on your back, your teary eyes staring up at the ceiling.

thats when you heard the front door open, the jingling of mikes house keys alongside his work ones

maybe he didnt leave

did he come back for you?

maybe he-

your thoughts are interrupted however by a gentle, almost silent knock at your door. you want to open it, you really do, but you're scared.

for once you put aside your fear and you sit up, quietly tiptoeing over to the door and cracking it open just enough to meet mikes eyes.

both of your teary eyes meet one another, and something snaps within both of you

your grip on the handle goes slack as mike gently pushes further on the door, and the moment it opens enough for him to enter, youre surrounded by him

he kisses you gently, his hands wrapping around you, and you two hold the kiss until you eventually pull away to gasp for air

"im so sorry- i never meant to snap at you baby- i-i- im just so exhausted- work is so hard- i-i never meant to take it out on you- i love you so muc y/n- i"

you cut him off by kissing him again, this kiss growing more heated, your body pressing against his

"its ok" you whisper when you pull away, your foreheads resting against one another

"we'll be ok" you whisper

those 3 words are repeated for the rest of the night, along with other words of praise and affirmation.

the two of you love each other, and tonight it shows.

just as youre about to fall into a warm, peaceful sleep, mike presses a kiss against your damp forehead.

"i love you"

that was all you needed to hear in order to slip into slumber in his embrace.

--

yayayayya mike

i hope that was good

ok ily

bye pookster

[jennamacaroni]

Thoughts on what Carli Lloyd was saying about the organization after the game?

what a question whew.

first of all i think its rich of her to talk about arrogance when she was the most selfish and arrogant player in the history of the program. literally couldnt stand being a bench player on a team that won the fucking world cup.

second, its incredibly disingenuous to put the performance this tournament (and last night especially) on the players and their "dancing" (????) and showing literally any speck of joy when the issue is CLEARLY due to the coaching staff and the truly head-scratching decisions that have occurred not only in this tournament but since the tokyo olympics. she went off on the players when she should have been directing that ire to the tactics, the formation, the lack of rotation of players, julie ertz playing centerback for the first time in nearly eight years (when alana cook was the most capped player in the year leading up to this tournament yet she hasnt played A SINGLE MINUTE?!) when we so desperately need her in the midfield... the list of things going wrong with this team starts and ends with vlatko andonovsky and to say otherwise is just plain garbage.

she should just say clearly that she thinks the players fight for equal pay and respect from their federation or their 'wokeness' is a distraction from their play rather than blame a fucking tiktok dance or whatever. what the uswnt players federation has done for the sport not only here in the united states but the ripple effect it has had on federations around the world is a huge reason why we are seeing such improved investment and run of play across all 32 teams in this tournament. and many teams that didn't even make this tournament. their courage has inspired other players to stand up to their federations and fight for what they deserve. what the uswnt players have done off the field is bigger than any one game or tournament and her alluding to that being a distraction is fucking garbage and i cant stand listening to her.

the only worthwhile thing that came out of her mouth is that the team last night is lucky to have moved on and the post was the player of the match. end rant.

[carpetbug]

what are ur fave songs for each character and WHY. ANALYSIS

omg thank u we’re in love now 😽

I have not updated these playlists in a while so a lot of them are songs i listened to in like 2020 lmao, heres a few from each :)

Marinette

Into the unknown (frozen 2) - original and cristina vees cover make me think so hard about marinette its crazy. her initially refusing to be ladybug, insistent that she couldnt do it but always coming back because she desperately wants to test those waters, see what shes meant to do and how it could change her.

Ladybug

Ribs (lorde) - how easily overwhelmed marinette gets and how her anxiety and stress almost force her to overthink every aspect of her life. I can see her getting this extreme tunnel vision where she cant see all the progress shes made, all the victories shes already had, and instead can only focus on how shes not doing enough, and its not fast enough, and its not good enough. it just really reminds me of how badly she wants to prove herself to be this strong and trustworthy hero, but she feels like shes losing herself as she grows and isolates herself more and more in the role of guardian and ladybug.

Adrien

Mamas boy (dominic fike) - he literally IS the mamas boy. what more can i say. also alludes to him being a sentimonster with the lines "when i was born, you were produced", "i wish i was a toy", "youre made from plastic im just blood".

Chat Noir

First love/late spring (mitski) - ok hear me out. how chat compensates for his family life with devoting himself to ladybug. "one word from you and i would jump off of this ledge im on" is exactly how he operates with her, being ready to throw himself in front of her, literally die for her if she ever said so. and she never does! she gets upset with him for doing it over and over! i just think this song depicts really well how chat noirs goal was always "do whatever I can to help ladybug, no matter what i may lose" while she had to watch him leave his life in her hands like it was nothing.

also including ships because obviously i have playlists for all lovesquare sides + other ships i’m silly about

Ladynoir

Show Yourself (frozen 2) - both the original and cristina vees cover (WHICH IS SO GOOD GO LISTEN TO IT RN) remind me so hardcore of ladynoir. the whole idea of ladybug finally coming to terms with showing chat who she truly is and being ready for the same from him, idk i can imagine an entire movie in my head of ladynoir reveal to this song. [fav lyrics: "I can sense you there, like a friend ive always known", "I have always been a fortress cold secrets deep inside. you have secrets too, but you dont have to hide", "you are the answer ive waited for all of my life"]

Blame (air traffic controller) - this is probably one of my all time favorite songs like fucking ever and tbh i can see it with all lovesquare sides but i feel like ladynoir is the best fit! Chat picking ladybug up when she falls down and constantly being there to remind her she was to get up and fight, theres no time to sit and pity and blame herself, and he wont let her. him being her voice of reason as she copes with losing almost everything to monarch, him grounding her and being one of her biggest motivations to go on! with how severely marinette overthinks and doubts herself, he just becomes a mantra of 'dont blame yourself' which she desperately needs [fav lyrics: "Dont blame yourself cause you tried as hard as hell with the hand that you were dealt", "get on your feet, enough 'poor me', if you got time to bitch and whine then theres still time to try again", "And the vultures they are circling overhead, theyre reminding me of choices from my past"]

Peach Scone (hobo johnson) - makes me think of early seasons ladynoir ;-; chat just being head over heels for ladybug, struggling with keeping his love platonic when he wants to be with her and know her. Also getting to kinda hear his side of ladybug saying shes already in love with someone, how he respects that but still is a bit of a flirt, and hides how much it hurts him. also i love hobo johnson. [fav lyrics: "She kinda loves him back, but not really, theyre just really good friends and thats fine, he understands, its rational", "Oh, you got a man? are you in love? so, what type?", "So i fall to the ground, collect myself and get ready to take over your heart or atleast your spare time"]

Talk to me (cavetown) - i am such a sucker for ladynoir comfort. the idea of them being there for each other at their lowest points, holding each other together. This whole song just makes me think so strongly of chat comforting ladybug when shes breaking down and needs someone. [fav lyric: "ill be here until youre okay, lets your words release your pain, you and i will share the weight"]

Could have been me (The struts) - GOD. THIS SONG. ITS SO LADYNOIR CODED TO ME. them hyping each other up!! keeping each other going!! being each others motivation to keep getting back up and fight!! i just love the idea of them constantly being there to pick each other up and remind them of what theyre fighting for. i could listen to this song forever i love it. I can also really hear "I cant hear you, I wont fear you" being a supportive call and response thing with them <3[fav lyrics: "I wanna taste love and pain, wanna feel pride and shame", "Don't wanna live as an unsung melody, i'd rather listen to the silence telling me i can't hear you, i won't fear you"]

Understood (leith ross) - i am a huuuuuge fan of leith ross so obv i love this song for ml. it just makes me think so much of a worn down, tired, sad chat just gushing and crying to ladybug about how he doesnt understand love, how his family dynamic impacts him, and just letting himself fall apart in her arms. and her relating! her feeling that same tiredness and guilt and ache about love and family and friends, how much invisible pressure is hanging over both their heads and only they understand it. [fav lyrics: "ill visit my family in living rooms that dont get cold cause blankets and body heat cant be compared when it only took you a week to grow old", "Im sick of attachments I recently learned I cant relax and im scared of myself, scared for my health, tell me youll take me back home", "im sick of the feeling that nothing will ever stand still"]

Struck by lightning (sara kays, cavetown) - this song just really makes me think about ladybugs devotion to chat. i just imagine chat being out in the middle of a storm at night and marinette seeing him from her window and joining him as lb to comfort him. her knowing hes not going to go inside, so she just sits and stays with him, insisting if hes going to get soaked and cold and possibly hit by lightning, shes going to do it with him. [fav lyrics: "If you don't respond, I'll put my shoes on and lay down on the pavement next to you if we get struck at least we'll make the news", "What a way to go out something this town will forever talk about the two kids who were laying down and struck by lightning in front of your house"]

She wants me (to be loved) (The happy fits) - literally early seasons ladynoir. she wants me! (to be loved). i think it just perfectly fits how in love with lb chat is and how its clear she cant give that to him. [fav lyrics: "so, you say you love me, but not the way I need, things are so close to what i want to be", "I cant stop feelin, i want her love but all my dreaming is not enough. so in the morning the sun will rise and ill wake up and she wont be mine", "why cant you love me here tonight?"]

Adrinette

I do adore (mindy gledhill) - marinette being head over heels for adrien and being her normal clumsy self. Falling over, rambling, making a huge fool of herself while adrien watches, completely oblivious to her crush. this song just really reminds me of how much marinette struggles with keeping herself calm around adrien, how shes always messing up words and doing the wrong thing, but he never freaks out at her and he never shames her for it. [fav lyrics: "when youre near i hide my blushing face and trip on my shoelaces", "Ive noticed youre remarkably relaxed and im overly uptight, we balance out each other nicely" "Tongue-tied, twisted, foot in mouth, i start to stutter ha-ha-heaven help me"]

Just a friend to you (meghan trainor) - early seasons adrinette <3 adrien being so painfully oblivious while marinette is struggling with balancing being his friend and her overwhelming feelings for him. [fav lyric: "so it breaks my heart when you say im just a friend to you cause friends dont do the things we do"]

Silly girl (chloe moriondo) - listen to this song rn! its so perfectly adrinette! its crazy! how marinette romanticizes adrien and kind of puts him on a pedestal at the beginning which leads to her ignoring how he doesnt fit into that idea shes molded of him. Her having to deal with the pain of being in silent love with him while he seems so far away, and turning that back around to use against herself. i just think it explain really well how marinette saw him in this perfect, unattainable bubble before they got closer and she realized he was nothing like his public image of perfection [fav lyrics: "im just a silly girl in a stupid dumb old world and he is perfect cause hes supposed to be", "he is perfect, unlike me, and how could i ever think that it was meant to be? and how could i ever think that anything was made for me?", "I made him perfect, cause i wanted him to be"]

Small (chloe moriondo) - this was originally intended to relate more towards marinette, but listening to it now with season 5 in my head it just screams adrien! how suddenly he falls for her and he cant get her out of his head! how in just a blink of an eye he is getting flushed when talking to her, hes wanting to be near her and talk to her, he wants to be with her! but shes pulling back from him and hes sort of unable to balance these new feelings AND respecting her boundaries because shes just the only thing he thinks about. i love simp boyfriend adrien. she fell first but he fell harder and no one can convince me otherwise [fav lyrics: "but im not used to dealing with feeling like im waisting your time", "ive never cared so much about avoiding overstepping, and when i think about you i forget about my hands" "endlessly try to make you smile cause whenever i see it my knees always get so weak"]

The one that got away (acoustic version - katy perry) - I am a mess over this song. i always imagine it as a post-reveal scenario in which something happened and ladybug lost chat in the fight against hawkmoth and found out he was adrien right as he died saving her. how badly she misses him and cant stop thinking about how he was the love of her life! having to go on living the rest of her life without him! shes unable to move past it and just spends her time thinking of all the things shed do if she still had him. in another life, they could still be happy together [fav lyrics: "we'd keep all our promises, be us against the world", "talk about our future like we had a clue, never planned that one day id be losing you"]

"Do you wanna be friends?" (leanna firestone) - Marinette breaking her own heart by having such a close friendship with adrien while being in love with him and knowing she cant do anything about it. Her desperately trying to convince herself she can be okay with a life with him as a friend and nothing more when obv she cant bc ouchie! her heart! [fav lyrics: "Do you wanna be friends? i mean, i wanna be more, but if friends is how i get to have you then sure", "The world wont end if you dont love me even if it feels that way"]

Marichat

If i could tell her (dear evan hansen) - i feel like this is a classic marichat song. like its been a marichat song for a hot minute but its still so them. chat comforting marinette about feeling like adrien doesnt notice her! and listing off things adrien 'told him about' and slowly realizing he does actually pay attention to all those small intimate things marinette does! he feels such a strong need to make sure marinette understands how important she is to adrien, and realizing how deep the disconnect between them two is [fav lyrics: "If i could tell her how shes everything to me but we're a million worlds apart and i dont know how i would even start", "And what do you do when the distance is too wide?"]

Drive (halsey) - i love this song for the idea of marinette and chat suppressing their feeling for each other because theyre 'supposed' to be in love with adrien and lb. for me it kind of paints a mental image of hangouts and games and memories between mari and chat that slowly become these intense, almost upsetting silences and tension. Just them desperately ignoring how deep their feelings for each other truly go and insisting everything remain surface level [ fav lyrics: "All we do is think about the feelings that we hide, all we do is sit in silence waiting for a sign", "Your laugh echoes down the hallway, carves into my empty chest, spreads over the emptiness. its bliss", "Overanalyze again, would it really kill you if we kissed?",]

Comfort crowd (conan gray) - this song just really makes me think of chat being at a really low point and trying to hide it from marinette so he doesnt burden her with his emotions and baggage, and her just seeing right through it. Like hes smiling and trying to wave it off and she just knows hes not okay, and he just breaks. Ultimately it makes me think of chat turning to marinette for such deep and intimate comfort that purely comes from him being with her. just knowing hes safe to hold onto her and cry and shell be that company for him. [fav lyrics: "this hurt that im holding's getting heavy, but imma keep a smile on my shoulders til im sweaty", "my breaths getting short and im unsteady, welling up in tears as i lay upon your belly", "Telling you im fine I dont really need nobody, but you say through a sigh that i said that lie already", "and even if i cry all over your body, you dont really mind say you like your shirt soggy"]

Lost in you (khai dreams) - i love the mental image of just such relaxed, fluffy, soft, marichat dynamic in this! chat slowly realizing hes in love with marinette and getting lost in every aspect of her. maybe not being able to entirely admit its love, but still being able to admit he has such a deep and sincere admiration for marinette that he feels is returned in a way he doesnt feel from ladybug [fav lyrics: "Im just looking for some mutual love but all i get is unrequited", "Cause i dont even know I dont know why, all your love im trynna find im so lost in you, in all that you do"]

Something there (beauty and the beast) - i enjoy a good disney song every now and then! its just so marinette and chat slowly falling for each other and being like "nuh uh... wait.. wait a minute.." and then falling headfirst in love with each other, and unable to communicate it. But both of them feeling this sudden new and strange spark between them, things slowly changing, becoming more and more personal and slowly beginning to accept that things have changed [fav lyrics: "And now hes dear, and so unsure, I wonder why I didnt see it there before", "and when we touched she didnt studder at my paw, no it cant be, ill just ignore, but then shes never looked at me that way before", "True that hes no prince charming but theres something in him that i simply didnt see"]

I'd have to think about it (leith ross) - another leith song bc THEYRE SO GOOD GO LISTEN TO ALL THEIR MUSIC RN anyways some angst a lil :) a future where marinette/lb and adrien/chat somehow got torn apart after the reveal and lost contact for. a hot minute. and when they've found each other again its chat finally finding marinette, in a new home, with a new family, and a new life. but they both know who each other are and marinette having to cope with knowing she would drop everything to be with him again. anyways. brain food. [fav lyrics: "but if you come to me, in my home with my three kids, if you asked me to leave, to be with you and split, well id atleast have to think about it", "and if you come to me when ive promised to commit, if you told me that you loved me and asked me for a kiss, well id atleast have to think about it", "you are my achilles heel, the weakness only I can feel"]

Come around (peter mcpoland) - THIS SONG MAKES ME SO GIDDY FOR SOME REASON!! makes me think of like chat picking marinette up from her balcony and taking her on rides, showing her (what he thinks shes never seen) a brand new side of paris and getting to bask in the warmth and light she radiates with him. 'shes looking at the pretty lights, i cant stop looking at her eyes' type shit. just him being so so down bad for her. [fav lyrics: "Ive noticed you pull the blinds back when you hear that im driving round", "i dont mean to cause any trouble, well maybe a little if thats allowed"]

Animal (neon trees) - this song also makes me so !! the vibes are so playful and fun and flirty while the lyrics are more intense. just really reminds me of how surface level marinette and chat keep things, flirting and teasing and just enjoying each other, and then as soon as things get more serious it comes down to a life/death type feeling. but still longing for each other! they know it just hurts and they cant but they want to! they both love and hate the way their relationship feels suspended in the air, in that it gives it a rush of uncertainty and playfulness but it also brings serious fears and pain. i love this song a lot for them [fav lyrics: "I do it everytime, your killing me now and i wont be denied by you, the animal inside of you", "hush hush the world is quiet, hush hush we both cant fight it, its us that made this mess, why cant you understand?"

Ladrien

Dixie boy (april smith and the great picture show) - i have to admit i dont think a whole lot about ladrien but! i am a sucker for jealous/posessive ladybug like claiming adrien for herself and adrien jsut being like. yep. okay. i agree. cause her ass is petty enough to like makeout with him in front of chloe just to really rub it in and adrien is like yippe!! my super hero bug gf loves me! while ladybug is so >:) do not ever touch my man [fav lyrics: "Cause like a soldier defends his land well i stand up, i get up, i defend my man", "Well i know the way that you girls operate so keep your hands to yourself and your eyes on your own plate. Its not nice to stare, dont make me come over there", "Im a lover, not a fighter, and i dont want to have to get rough. just warning you ahead of time I can be a bitch when it comes to my stuff"]

Bad ideas (tessa violet) - both adrien and ladybug just being such lovesick nerds for each other <3 ladybug trying to fight the urge to kiss him when theyre together, and adrien doing anything he can to keep her near him. they both know its a bad idea, to just stop trying to keep it all contained, but its so tempting to just say fuck it and indulge the bad ideas. atleast for a little [fav lyrics: "But i just wanna see the grooves between your hands, your teeth, oh, tell me do you think about me?", "So why'd i wanna kiss you even though i miss you, guess i just wanted to know what it would feel like"]

Her (eery) - how much adrien thinks about ladybug. just all the different ways he dissects her personality, their memories, every little bit of information he knows about her. i just feel like this song, while simple, just really encapsulates how constantly ladybug is on his mind. i miss that dynamic damn

YOUTH (troye sivan) - ladybug and adrien running away together. fuck it. literally think about it. them just being in love and together and adrien finally getting out of that HOUSE and getting to be with his LADY and be happy. How deeply devoted to each other they would be, and although naive, they would be so sincere and literally ride or die for each other.

Roman holiday (halsey) - i love the idea of ladrien having those small, important firsts together. putting aside not being able to be completely honest with each other, adriens entire family dynamic, everything, and just saying screw it and dating and doing couple things! theyre both too scared of what might happen if they slow down and face reality, so they ignore everything outside of themselves. they both have that ache of knowing its not real, its not how they can actually live, but for now they get to be happy. and in love. and with each other. and theyll deal with all the heartbreak later [fav lyrics: "didnt know where we were running to but dont look back", "and we know that were headstrong, and our hearts gone, and the timings never right"]

and my other playlists

Chat Blanc

ANTI-HERO (SEKAI NO OWARI) - i will do my best to put my emotions towards chat blanc into comprehensible words but i make no promises. i love him so much. anti-hero gives like him turning his back on being a hero just for marinette, being okay with being viewed as evil hated because hes doing it for her! his distaste for the rest of the world in comparison to mari/lb ! how he lost his moral compass and doesnt understand the ways hes hurting her and himself by turning his back on being chat noir! god its so good [fav lyrics: "im gonna be the anti-hero, feared and hated by everybody, im gonna be the anti-hero so i can save you when the time comes", "cause there are people that ive got to protect and if you get in my way youre dead"]

I am damaged (heathers) - you caught me im a theater nerd but literally this song is so good for chat blanc! him coming to the realization the only way to save mari/lb is to destroy himself. him saying goodbye and making sure she understand that she was his everything! and he trusts her to fix the mistakes he made because shes his lady! and her not being able to talk him out of it and just having to say goodbye [fav lyric: "wish youd kiss me then youd know i worship you, ill trade my life for yours and once i disappear clean up the mess down here"]

Blah blah blah (the oozes) - reminds me of the trauma marinette gets from chat blanc, how she suffers nightmares and just cant stop being reminded of the horrible fate her partner suffered through. how marinette just cant go back to 'normal' after fighting him but also cant confide in anyone about it [fav lyrics: "you couldn't care less for the people youre hurting, there no excuse", "youve ruined the color blue for me, im surrounded by a deep dark sea"]

Anytime you smile (JT music, Andrea storm kaden) - kind of how i imagine chat blanc kept himself going while being isolated for all those months. coping by pretending ladybug was still with him and nothing was wrong, but slowly feeling uneasy and letting reality creep in. it shows how desperately he fights against his loneliness and pain with day dreaming, but still loses his mind. [fav lyrics: "anytime you smile baby you know you drive me wild, crazy! thats why you got me screamin, i think i might be dreamin", "believe me if im sleeping, i wanna keep on dreaming", "Someday soon this honey moon might be gone though, i hate goodbyes. I might not love you still, youll find no tougher pill to swallow (open your eyes)", "I stepped into a nightmare when i woke up from utopia starting to remember my depression and my phobias, why is everybody looking at me like i lost it?", "How can i be happy here? guess ill just pretend to be!" "no more sadness in this beautiful world, in love with happiness shes a beautiful girl!")

Mr bright side (the killers) - IM SORRY?? "it started out with a kiss how it did end up like this?" AND YOU DIDNT THINK THIS WOULD BE ON MY CHAT BLANC PLAYLIST?? thats really it for some reason this song is just so chat blanc to me. i love it.

Bad bad things (ajj) - im also a big fan of just bonkers insane scary chat blanc, him losing his humanity and only being able to see it reflected in mari/lb and not being able to stand it. him not being able to control his more violent ideas and losing himself in hurting others [fav lyrics: "So i looked into your eyes and i saw the reflection of a coward that you and i both hate very much", "If i dont go to hell when I die i might go to heaven but probably not"]

Akumanette

Dumb dumb (mazie) - i love the idea of an akumanette that just LOSES it on her friends after lila does some real stupid shit. none of her friends standing with her or supporting her and marinette getting so so upset and frustrated that they would be dumb enough to fall for it! which, being akumatized, of course wont come out the wrong way and is warped into this monstrous idea that marinette sees them as these morons who have disappointed her time and time again [fav lyric: "disappointment takes us by surprise even though by now i think we should have realized everyone is dumb"]

Class fight (melanie martinez) - god I LOVE AKUMANETTES THAT LOSE THEIR SHIT. lila putting distance and uncomfort between her and adrien (pre relationship) before marinette catches them kissing and get akumatized, and then marinette wrecks her shit :) her inner voice of reason feeling so horrified with the brutality and trying to get herself to realize but being able to deny monarchs voice encouraging her to act on her worst instincts [fav lyrics: "she had a boy wrapped around her finger tight, i fell in love with him but he wasnt in my life", "Her face was fucked up and my hands were bloody, we were in the playground things were getting muddy", "my one true love called me a monster"]

Bust your kneecaps - johnny dont leave me (pomplamoose) - i think this one really works well with an akumatized ladybug! her being so soft and scary to chat, chat blanc style, while promising to do horrible things to him. akumabug trying to convince him to 'just stop fighting' and 'hand over his miraculous' and then 'everything will be just the way it should be' and finally giving up and working instead to defeat chat rather than convince him

Therefore i am (billie eilish) - cold, angry akumanette FOR THE WIN OGH her just being such a silent but deadly akuma, her voice devoid of all the love and kindness it used to have when she was with adrien/chat, and him having to fight her while she shows no mercy. I just love the idea of chat doing anything he can, crying and begging marinette to fight it and come back to him and she has no pity for him [fav lyrics: "Get my pretty name out of your mouth, we are not the same with or without", "Did you have fun? i really couldnt care less and you can give them my best but just know im not your friend"]

Pretty privilege (blegh) - marinette being shown time and time again that the worst people will get away with horrible things, while she has to suffer beneath them and getting fed up. her letting all her feelings rise to the surface about how ugly she thinks people can truly be [fav lyrics: "Its crawling from underneath the surface nobodys first choice kind of ugly", "just because somethings pretty the laws dont apply to them have you noticed this shit its so ugly"]

Other friends (cristina vee cover) - i live for crazy akumanette losing her mind on everyone! what can i say! i love the idea of her confronting her friends and lilas lies in such a angry but playful way before losing her shit! and the added bonus of it being MARINETTES voice?? im screaming [fav lyrics: "What did she say about me, what did she say?", "Im the loser of the game you didnt know you were playing", "life on the line, winner takes all, ready or not lets begin!"]

Marigami/Kagaminette

She (dodie) - kagami fighting against her feelings for marinette because of their friendship, because of adrien, because of her mother, and because shes scared to admit she loves marinette far beyond how friends should. I love her just gently pushing that line, asking herself that question of "what is so wrong about it?" and working to accept that the pain and heartache are real because her feelings are [fav lyrics: "Could it be wrong when shes just so nice to look at ?", "id never tell, no id never say a word and oh it aches, but it feels ugly good to hurt"]

Sophie (black polish) - marinettes feelings for kagami! wanting to freeze her time with her, relive every moment they've been through and just experience the world by kagamis side. just how desperately they both need each others time and space, how comforting it is to just be with her. [fav lyrics: "youre impossible to read and thats fine, i dont even understand my own mind", "I just wanna escape the world sophie with you, with you, with you, with you"]

and an added bonus: i LOVE the song Bruno is Orange for kagami. reminds me of her so much.

[muekyn]

okay. im going to talk about the fnaf movie.

SPOILERS UNDER READ MORE!!!

overall, i thought it was very good. somehow making a whole series of a video game condensed into 1.5 hrs is not something easy to do. i think with what they were working with, they executed it pretty well. costume design was superb, and the acting from josh hutcherson was amazing.

that being said, i did find some scenes didn't belong. for example the fort scene, though i'm sure many people have pointed that out already.

i felt like they were trying to tow the line between silly/cute and scary/suspenseful, but in my opinion i don't think they needed to do that? i think if they leaned in fully to the horror aspect it would have still been a very enjoyable experience.

the scenes with vanessa disappointed me, just a bit. it felt like she was only there to progress the story/exposition. and the fucking fort scene with her... in that scene, vanessa is like "oh freddy fazbears' is so fun yayayayay" and then literally in the next scene she's telling mike "if you ever come back here IM GOING TO SHOOT YOU" ???????????? like why? what did mike even do?

the old bf made an observation that william afton was just straight up not fleshed out, at least not as much as either one of us had hoped.

i personally think if they had just included like... a 5 minute scene of william afton on his killing spree (without outright showing william afton), it would have done alot for his character. i felt like he was just kind of thrown in there towards the end, which makes me sad bc william afton is such a unique character with sooo much backstory integral to the lore of fnaf, and it just felt like he was alluded to the whole movie? idk.

there were some questionable moments. it was funny how freddy literally just murders the aunt and no one even questions it? mike would have come home to a literal corpse in his house, how does he explain that to the police?

and it made me sad how little they showed of foxy. :( foxy is my all time favorite (i literally brought a giant stuffed foxy plush with me to the movie) and it felt like he was the most forgotten animatronic. bonnie seemed to be the main center of attention tbh, he was in almost every scene where the animatronics were. but it makes sense since scott cawthon thinks bonnie is the creepiest animatronic lol.

those are my main criticisms.

but i still loved it, very much so!

when the matpat cameo came on screen... it was a shocker. i gasped so loud. the people in the movie theater literally laughed at me lol bc i gasped SO LOUD, I COULDNT HELP IT i was so shocked. AND WHEN HE SAID ITS ONLY A THEORY???? i ate it up. idc if it's cheesy, I ATE IT UP.

also i thought it was cool that the movie is (i think but could be wrong) five nights long! a little easter egg that i thought was neat. the old bf pointed this out to me.

another nice touch is in the beginning of the movie when mike is reading that dream theory book. a good callback to matpat's dream theory on fnaf (you know the one). and it's also a good way to tie in what's currently happening to mike with his dreams in the movie.

i really appreciated the subtle little ways they tied in the movie with the games, like the little "it's me" in the mirror during the scene with mike in the security room. and foxy's humming!!!! i loved it i loved it i loved it! the little noises they used from the game made me so happy!

but yeah. i'll stop ranting bc i can go on forever lol. while it had it's flaws, i don't think they affected the overarching storyline.

this is it my gamers. eight years in the making, and this is the end result.

my score? 4 cupcakes out of 5. :>

[ddejavvu]

Okay but you know how cat purrs are supposed to have like healing power? Saving catboy!eddie but he’s still a little gremlin man who, while he has some respect for you, will not admit it in his earliest days in your house. Leaves whatever room you’re in if you sit too close but lounges about like he owns the place. Will hiss and warn you if you try to touch, so you know it might take him a while to warm up to people. But in the first week you get a really bad cold, your chest heaving, having a bit of trouble breathing. And Eddie comes out from his room where he was napping, and grumbling lays on your chest, starting to purr up a storm. “Couldnt sleep” he mumbles, alluding to the fact your coughing was keeping him up, but also sounding like he needed you in the same sentence. He purrs on you and then starts nuzzling, getting under your chin, trying to make your breathing sound a bit better, make you feel better

THIS!! THIS DYNAMIC!! eddie's embarrassed to have been a hybrid living on the streets so he refuses to like you, because he's so embarrassed you saw him like that. he's embarrassed that he needs you, he's embarrassed that you bought him clothes and a bed and shoes and food, even though he's so so thankful for it. he just feels like a charity case and he hates it. so he really does act like a prissy cat, scratching when you try to pet him and knocking shit over just for fun (because he wants to be in control of when he gets kicked out. he's so certain that it'll happen that he's trying to force it so that he has control). and honestly, you probably get the cold from him. he's been living on the streets for years, even after a lengthy hot shower with lots of soap and shampoo and scrubbing he's still not the healthiest man in the world. he feels bad for that, he feels bad that you caught some disease from him, but then that makes him even more embarrassed, because he feels unsanitary. he mostly leaves you alone while you're sick, really not wanting to face any of the situation, so he just lounges around your home and secretly wishes for you to get better. but he really gets worried when you're coughing nonstop, he can hear how congested you are and it's making him antsy. he peers into the crack in your doorway and sees you laying there weak and sick, he finally gathers the courage to slink in and crawl up next to you in bed - he's never done anything like it before, he doesn't even let you touch him, so you really think you're hallucinating when he mashes his face into your chest and starts purring with his cheek against you. he explains himself with the 'couldn't sleep' excuse, and you're not sure how he means it, maybe both, but you're just so thrilled that he's laying with you that you don't care :')) he's a warm bundle of coziness in bed with you and he'll sprawl out over you entirely if it makes you feel better :(

[homestuckexamination]

ive been revisiting homestuck and hiveswap recently and have been thinkin realll hard abt classpects for shits n giggles. recently i saw a theory abt how the hiveswap kids n trolls represent the remaining unused classpects between the alpha and beta sessions and i thought that was a pretty neat concept! so im classpecting those kiddos within those confines. im just throwin stuff at the wall and seein what sticks but here are my ideas so far:

joey claire: sylph of doom

(because of dooms inherent empathy, and how in act 1 she had used her own negative experience with her father to connect to xefros. her being a healer is alluded to VERY heavily, and she is also seen to be rather meddlesome throughout act 2)

xefros tritoh: mage of rage

(this is the one of the wackier concepts. was thinking abt act 2 xefros, with his innate understanding of highblood violence in the face of joeys ignorance, and knowing that the purplebloods were likely to be harmful to them)

tetrarch dammek: thief of blood

(pretty self explanatory, although we dont know much abt the character, considering his manipulation of xefros and their relationship it seems as though dammek is really using his ‘blood connections’ for his own gain)

lastly, jude harley: bard of mind

(quite possibly THE wackiest concept but, hear me out. he has pretty intense beliefs regarding conspiracy theories, which in act 1 joey would begin to admit as *fact*. theres is a lot of faith and belief being assigned to believing in conspiracy theories, which lends itself to the bard class. yet, they are apparently *fact*. despite the absurdity of judes beliefs, it became apparent that there were some level of truth and logic behind his strange beliefs, which could lend itself to the mind aspect.)

sidenotes: i could also see bard of blood dammek, but idk how the shuffle would effect the other characters. overall i do see the fandoms existing classpects (i.e page of rage xeros) working perfectly, but filling out the remaining slots scratches a specific part of my brain and i couldnt stop thinkin abt it :P

Ah this was a classic back in the day. It's been far too long for me to really properly assess with Hiveswap still coming out and us not knowing that much yet. I did have one analysis of their Classpects way back when but like, I'm just gonna wait, personally, to see more. Fair assessments though!

[castlebyersafterdark]

What you wrote about giving blowjobs was just one of the most beautiful descriptions of that sex act I've ever read, and I've read a fair few sexology books.

The isolated point of focus? The strangeness of being physically close but also still kind of far away from them, from their face, their breath and expressions? It's not something that's discussed but I've always been fascinated with the physical spatiality of sex. Camera angles in porn and movies can also make lovers look oddly far away from each other, whereas it's not that far irl. it's like looking at your foot and thinking it's so far away from your body yet it's still part of you and controlled by you. I also think dicks have this energy - a hard dick is just there, it almost doesnt look like it can fit or belong to the body haha (see those steve + jeans gifs you posted - he is BUSTIN out of those pants hahaha it's obscene!)

i too want that magic for mike and will - imagine how will would feel when he looked up and saw that mike was not only allowing him to do this, but enjoying it? and thank you as well for talking about this because i definitely grew up thinking that giving a BJ was debasing and i would only ever be at the whim of the man, and that he might even do something that would hurt me because it felt good for him (happened to lots of friends) and i couldnt find a way to make that kind of submission gel with my values, so i've ended up avoiding giving BJs in general. reading fic and seeing headcanons like this makes me feel like it could be possible i would find a partner who is respectful and let's me 'go at my own pace' like you said. maybe its just because i can't believe i would ever be able to make anyone give me 'that expression' just by touching them.

vinny i genuinely thought your fav sex act would be the same as will's (🍑🍑🍑), so im surprised by this revelation! hehe

Oh geez, that makes me feel some sort of way, so thank you 😌 If you have a passion, speak from the heart I suppose 🤣🤣🤣

But jokes aside, it's the honest truth! What I hope I do here is give a little different sort of introspection and just a different viewpoint on this sort of stuff, because I just enjoy speaking freely and honestly, sure there's fun in the crude and silly, but I also think that bringing back a little romanticism to talking about sex just helps when the vibes too many places only treat it as a total joke or a taboo. Normalize. Get a little lofty. Embrace being passionate. Explore a fantasy. Look at things from different viewpoints. I'm a really, really sappy guy. I'm know I'm pretty different. And I like that.

Glad you enjoyed my vision for them, it's just so!!! Yeah. And everyone has different journeys. I've alluded to certain things about myself and your mindset and comfort levels and interests can change over time. Or you decide, hey, that's actually not for me. But at least thinking and considering things is good, no matter what. We're always learning and growing.

And we would think, right??? Hahaha. Definitely a big fan, but not quite the number one. I don't know, I can't explain it. Well, I totally can, but something about framing personal insight through the guise of fictional characters is one thing, but when i shift too specifically and too directly about myself, it feels overly graphic haha. But I uhhhhh. I really really love doing that. It is what it is. Live without shame I guess, that's what I've been trying to say 😘😉

[asterssunzephyr]

So... can we have the moment where Gem sees that Pearl is alive and well in HC9? 🥺

Absolutely.

---- Writing bit below ----

She stared at the older woman, who was carelessly talking to their friend. Theres no way it could be, right? Her sister died, if she remembered correctly. Maybe she didn't remember correctly, Maybe she was wrong about Pearl dying when(or like) she did. Its been years since it happened, maybe she was misremembering! Shaking her head and continuing to listen to what was being said, she focused on that. Starter bases have to be at spawn, mega bases can be wherever, etc etc. Alright, okay. Not too bad! She couldn't shake the feeling she was seeing a ghost though.

"Gem! Impulse and I are going exploring, wanna come with us?!"

"Ah- Uh- yeah! Sure! It'll be fun! Lets just hope Impulse isnt too slow for us."

The way she laughed and smiled? It was still her sister, but did she remember anything? Did she remember dying, like Gem remembered? If She didnt, than that was for the best, but if she did, why didnt she mention it?

The day went on, and as it did Gem let the feeling she was seeing a ghost allude her, and rather focused on having her sister back; Everthing was going to be fine, surely. At least until they raided a mansion, somehow they all mostly lived with Cleo. Maybe everything taking a turn to being peaceful started with Impulse and Pearl yelling "behind you Gem!" and her somehow failing to realize what they meant until a creeper blew her up and she almost died. When they returned to spawn to build their starter houses, Gem couldnt shake the feeling that if she was on a permadeath server, no one wouldve looked at for her like they did.

Maybe it would be okay, She has her older siblings and she isnt on a permadeath server. She was safe here, and everything would be fine! She just had to remember this..

[javid-shamash]

69 for stras and aeon :-)

man. thisll be a long one. Stras first cause itll be a little shorter

aelwyd cannot be trusted. she's self serving and will sell out anyone if it gives her any sort of edge, no matter how small. he's pretty sure she can be trusted to hate bela but he does not trust her with literally anything else. everytime he's given her a chance to prove herself trustworthy she's immediately betrayed it

blank is so fucking naive and so easily manipulated its embarrassing. theyll listen to literally anything anyone says and that makes them so easy to use as a tool for ulterior purposes, and as such, cannot be trusted. also theyre obviously getting used like a goddamn puppet by probably vecna. whatevers going on, theyre not in total control, and as such is even MORE of a threat

chini is a threat fullstop. bela's in her fuckign BRAIN. absolutely cannot be trusted. he'll try to help kairii break her out of it but. man. whatever happens happens. if that means working with her, if that means getting rid of her. stras knows things will most likely break bad

kairii is... interesting. stras did not really think much of them except as a good fighter, but now that he's getting to know them, hes realizng theyre WAY more similar than he thought, and is kind of vibing?? they both know what theyre about. stras is beginning to think. there might be someone here who actually understands him

ira is. as she's always been. a nice, comfortable enigma. she's nice and helpful and he has no fucking clue what's up with her. he doesn't know where she will fall when the chips are down, but knows she helped him get the truth from that shadow thing in the last battle. he's hoping they can reach a consensus but. she's a mystery to him

Aeon time.

Thyme is... odd. theres really no other way to put it. aeon just categorically does not understand thyme at all. they dont understand thyme's priorities, thyme's motivations, why thyme cares so much about making things fancy, about being the one to win people over... thyme is. weird. theyre also not helpful with literally anything

sylvas!!!! bugboy. uhm. whats happening with you <3. aeon is confused by sylvas but in a different way than thyme because aeon does not know or understand what academics are and why sylvas cares about it. aeon wants to be supportive but is. confused. and also maybe theyre a teeny tiny bit a little jealous that they can get along with uo so well when aeon feels like they barely know how to interact with uo on a good day despite caring about them so much. the social anxiety swag

ymira is fun! she's really interesting and cool to talk and hang out with and is a nice cook. but also. aeon doesnt really. know how to talk to her. they feel like everytime theyve tried, its petered out and theyve just. completely failed to talk to her. plus when aeon asked her advice and she couldnt help at all they just. felt so dissappointed and they dont want to blame ymira for that. its not her fault. but there's a bit of bitterness that the one person he thought would understand. didnt

aine is some kind of creature of some sort. another one that aeon. doesnt really know how to interact with. but also aeon feels some solace in that. aine the most feels like someone aeon could sit in a room in silence with for hours and not feel like the silence is awkward or uncomfortable. which aeon just. really appreciates? aeon sort of likes not knowing much about aine because it means he can maintain this sort of. communal silence without worrying about personal shit interrupting

uo is aeon's first friend, and as i alluded earlier, aeon has no idea how to interact with them and feels very very embarrassed by it. they should know! they were in a similar environment, they have similar builds and fighting styles, theyve got similar interests... but aeon just. does not know how to talk to uo and it feels like uo says things that are important and necessary but aeon doesnt understand them at all. so. aeon feels. awkward. they care about uo a lot and appreciate them greatly. but it sucks not knowing how to talk to them. also there's some lingering issues with getting such a stark reminder of Woods Time but he's. mostly over it

echo goldaline. man. what a card. aeon has such a myriad of feelings about echo that he has no fucking clue what to do about. theyve been trying to like. sort and dissect their thoughts but everything keeps happening always and forever. so they never get a chance to just. think. and put their feelings into words. so its just a mess of confusion and bitterness and affection that cannot build into something concrete. they think theyre friends with echo. they dont want anything else. but beyond that. they dont know

[ineedacalicocat]

I am so done with JK. I didn’t exactly ship jikook but I enjoyed their interactions and they seemed to have a close friendship at least, so I supported JK along with Jimin and was open to the idea that they could be more than friends. But right now I literally don’t want JK anywhere near Jimin. How is it that he is unable to come online and post a single word of support for any of Jimin’s solo work so far yet has no problem coming online and going live for hours even going live with tae? How come he is such a huge fan of all the other guys’ solo songs and collabs and know them all word for word except for Jimin’s? No, for Jimin he makes a point of saying that he doesn’t know the lyrics, doesn’t know it was released and even alludes to the fact that he watched the music video with Tae and they made fun of the lyrics. Seriously?? I hate that army finds this so cute and amusing while it hurts me and angers me so much. I agree with your thinking that jk and tae are bullies. After today’s live I have reached the point where I don’t even want jimin in bts anymore. I want him far from them. He is all I care about from now on. Jk and Tae can have each other I don’t even care, and the rest of them can go to hell. They have never treated Jimin the way he deserves and I am done giving them the benefit of the doubt

Welcome to the bangtan world and bts fandom. This has been always like that. Jimin was the groups punching bag. I am so used to it that at this point i dont even watch bts run. Cause they always mock him not take him seriously especially suga. I dont know if you watched his show. He was just like taekook so bitter about jimin like he coudnt even say somrthing nice about jimin he eas so bitter even taryang was shocked couldnt even say a nice word about jimin. He literally mentioned jk out if nowhere? And said jungkook is naturally talent where jimin is a made up talent like wtf shut your ass chicken legs you re the ine to talk fucking asshole

[wrapnrappp]

ehehe...

doppo headcanon post time!!

tw for sh

- gay (obviously). i wouldnt say hes leik closeted or whatevs, but most ppl dont know since he just never makes a point to mention it. cue hifumis brain short-circuiting when doppo offhandedly alludes to it

- hes needed glasses since 2nd grade. bro was cursed to be a blind bitch from the start

- due to bullying, hes insecure abt literally every aspect of himself. its gotten to the point where hes internalized everyones words so intensely that he just. thinks hes doomed to be met with disgust & hatred forever. hes a doormat because he feels the way he treats others is all he can control in his life and maybe, just maybe, if hes nice enough the insults will stop.

- self hatred got worse after the honobono situation as he couldnt do the one thing he was good for: protect hifumi. to this day he keeps that bottled up cause he doesnt want to make hifumis trauma about him

- despite his dislike for his physical appearance, he doesnt make any attempt to change it. he thinks hes just always going to be "ugly" no matter what he does

- very fond of ghibli movies. no further explanation needed🔥🔥

- u know how he canonically hugs a pillow in his sleep? yeah. thats cause he desperately needs someone to cuddle with to sleep but hes too embarrassed to ask anyone. and he may or may not picture hifumi when wishing someone was actually there instead of that pillow...

- naturally just. very warm all the time (bro hates the summer so much). secretly loves how it makes hifumi want to cuddle with him more (little does doppo know that hifumi would want to cuddle no matter what ! warmth is just a bonus)

- king of unhealthy coping mechanisms here. has struggled with self harm and stress eating since high school. hes trying to stop, but no shit its hard. living with hifumi really helped him get better as he didnt want hifumi to have to see him engaging in self destructive behavior + hifumi is hifumi. ofc hes super supportive & helps doppo when he can (i loveee how they help eachother with their issues ! yay !)

- bad habit of chewing the inside of his mouth & teeth grinding; tries to keep gum on him at all times to stop it

- has never been skinny at any point in his life; hes been overweight for as long as he can remember.

- got into art by drawing plants & animals. only expanded to humans once the hifumi crush™️ hit and he suddenly had the urge to draw him in all of his sketchbooks (insert that one spiderverse scene here). even though hes good at art, he never considered a career in the arts as he didnt think he was good enough or that it would provide a stable enough income. he still draws occasionally now, you can see doodles in the margins on some of his unimportant papers

- the only organized part of his room is his windowsill where his plants sit. everywhere else is covered in dirty clothes & discarded papers & knickknacks

- even though hifumi is like. not subtle AT ALL abt how much he likes doppo, doppo just does not process any of hifumis actions as romantic pre-hifudo-getting-together. hifumi's cuddling him, face buried in doppos chest nd he thinks nothing of it at all. thats just how hifumi isss, theres no way he could like doppo!! (yet another example of doppos insecurity screwing him over... if only he didnt label himself as "undateable".

- never been interested in fashion, he just wears whatever fits. refuses to wear anything tight as it makes him really uncomfortable

- subconsciously fidgets with his clothes. like when at work hell mess around with his shirt nd blazer buttons or employee ID, its kind of a way to ground himself when hes feeling like total dookie

- he doesnt do anything at all with his hair, he kinda just lets it curl however nd go wherever it wants. most hell do is move it out of his eyes. only reason he remembers to get his hair cut is cause hifumi cuts it for him at home & always points out when its getting too long. also doesnt care abt his body hair, he never shaves.

-lowkey wants to pick up new hobbies, like stuff like crochet & embroidery look really fun to him, but he never has the time to pick anything new up. he doesnt read books often for the exact same reason. someone get bro a better job IMMEDIATELY please

[zucchinibread777books]

ACOTAR Book Review Pt.5 (final)

For my final post about ACOTAR, I will talk about the way that the author's internalized misogyny is reflected in her work. (In the future my reviews won't be this long, I was passionate about this one lol). Spoilers ahead 1. All of the major female characters fit into the sister, mother, lover roles. They lack the depth to create meaningful relationships between them and the main character. The closest female character she has to a friend (Alis) does not have any characterization to make her relationship with Feyre genuine. She is simply a mother to her sister’s children, who was forced to take care of Feyre. 2. Despite this being a fantasy world, the patriarchy exists. Every position of power is filled by men (except Amarantha, who I will discuss later). Even with how power is decided, the brothers must compete to replace their father. There is no mention as to whether Tamlin or Lucien even have sisters. Why in this completely made-up world are men the power holders? 3. This is a basic critique but the way she uses male and female is a big ick for me. It’s very reminiscent of how misogynistic men use the terms. Similarly, the only curses/slurs she uses throughout the text are bitch and whore, two words rooted in misogyny. They don’t fit well with the fantasy language and, in the case of Rhys, calling him Amarantha’s dog would have been more fitting and more insulting. 5. Both Nesta and Elain are very vain and empty from the start and they hardly gain any character.  Nesta’s character is particularly self-contradictory, as she despises her father for not helping the family and later takes on Feyre’s role as protector, yet she never helps Feyre herself and actively undoes Feyre’s work by spending her money. This was half-hearted and only contributed to the lack of well-rounded female characters in the story. 6. Amarantha contradicts my point about men being the main power holders, but her character also fits into a specific sexist trope. The female villainess, often a subordinate to the main male antagonist (which is alluded to) must obtain all of her real power by tricking and stealing it from the powerful male characters. Her trickery often revolves around her using her evil female sexuality (I say with a hint of sarcasm) and she makes rash decisions based on emotions and sexual obsession with the main male character. She is spurred by her tragic backstory of male violence in which her sister is “fridged”. But of course, the real victim is the man whom she sexually abuses. There is a lot to unpack here. 7. Unimportant female characters throughout this novel are also treated poorly. Lucien’s love was killed because she was of a lower rank and he loved her. The girl Tam met the night of the Great Rite "asked him" to hurt her. The girl Feyre pretended to be was murdered and strung up naked. Amarantha’s sister was murdered by the man she loved. This is violence that is specific to women throughout the plot. Many of these details were unnecessary, especially the girl being naked when strung up. 8. The SA in the Great Rite scene. It is very common in romantic novels to portray SA between the MC and love interest, and it is often meant to read as romantic. What does this teach the reader? How do the author and reader view romance if the ideal involves the man sexually assaulting the woman? This continues when the second love interest, Rhys, not only forces himself into Feyre’s mind and invades her desires, but later forces her to wear revealing clothing, gets her drunk, and touches her, which she has no memory of. He also kisses her. Finally, he enslaves her, branding her arm as a sign that he owns her. Like cattle. And yet Tam’s character is so poorly written that the audience is likely to side with Rhys and prefer him just because he is interesting. These scenes are not romantic and should not be portrayed as such. They should absolutely not have some poor excuse like he couldnt control his animal instinct or he was actually helping protect her. It is a real issue that plots like this only reinforce.

It's harmful and the romance doesn't work.