#so is jason mcconell
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Jake Dillinger is both Icarus and Apollo.
Fight me on this. I dare you.
#so is jason mcconell#i've been on an icarus and apollo kick#like#most of the music i've been listening to#is either icarus by bastille#icarus and apollo by ripto#and apollo by faith zapata#it's my fav myth if you couldn't tell#bmc
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Here goes an over analysis of âOnce Upon A Timeâ, I will heavily discuss the topics of suicide and suicidal thoughts in this analysis and Iâm putting a huge Trigger warning and content warning for those on this post!! Please be sure to be in the right headspace before reading!
@bluejaye91 asked me to do some more songs and they motivated me to actually do another episode of this!!
It had been a hot minute since I listened to the demo tracks of bare and let me tell I was shook when I gave Stupid Second Thoughts a listen.
There is one CORE difference in the demo that is not in the final version. It is made so clear in stupid second thoughts that Jason is already planning to kill himself before he even goes to see the Priest!
Listen to these chilling lyrics:
âHeart beat, pumping blood and racing in itâs final hoursâ (00:00 -00:09)
âI donât need to search anymore, No other arms could hold the peace of yours To stay with you I wish I couldâ (00:09-00:27)
âBut Iâll have to let the worlds fall on your sleeping years So I donât see you honest tearsâ (00:27-00:42)
âItâs so hardâŚ.â (00:42- 00:49)
Like wow, are you already crying? Yeah me too and this is only the start! We follow with heavy recall to the song Ever After
âI know I should be the hero that fulfills you dreams
But some Ever Afterâs just canât beâ (00:49-01:03)
This lyric was cut after the 2000 Los Angeles run, and gotta admit I kinda miss it!
The demo version also contains the confession that Jason was indeed very much in love with Peter!
âSo goodnight my love yes you heard it righ you were my loveâ (01:03-01:15)
This line heavily reminds me of this lyric from âBareâ:
âPlease know I loved you from the startâ (01:15-01:30) Which is a line Jason says after he has decided to kill himself.
There is one last imagery I in the demo version that I find interesting to share.
âNothing left to say Trapped alone here with my best plans laid astray Standing scared outside a locked church, soul search Seeking some last answer from some higher powerâ (01:30- 01:53)
A locked church as opposed to a cold church. In this version Jason feels even more hostile towards his religion. Also note that âhigher powerâ was replaced with âa god who loves meâ so in the demo Jason truly doesnât think that his god could accept him the way he is. And in this paragraph we have again indication that Jason has already made up his mind ânothing left to sayâ and âsome last answerâ namely.
I think itâs safe to say that in this version the talk with the priest has much less impact on Jason which is probably why these lyrics were all cut and altered at some point!
With that letâs move on the soundboard audio of the 2000 Los Angeles run, the song is now officially called âOnce Upon A Timeâ and much closer to the final version
âI donât need to search anymore No other arms could hold the peace of yours To stay with you I wish I could I know I should be a hero who fulfills your dreams But some ever afterâs just canât beâ (01:53-02:31)
This is a slightly altered version of what was in the Demo. But to quote one the dear people in the bare discord itâs also THE line we were robbed of!! Jason McConell stop making us cry challenge!!
âOnce upon a time When all was good and right I held your hand in mineâ (02:31 â 02:54)
What this paragraph is telling me is that Jason didnât feel wrong or dirty when he was with Peter, and by John Griffinâs delivery you can tell the despair inside of Jason, he knows that the church and his family canât accept him, and once upon a time clearly signals that the time when all was good and right is over and will never be again.
âAnd we knew it all Did you know my love for you The only truth I ever knewâ (02:54 â 03:12)
Also âThe only truth I ever knewâ! We know that Jason has a lot of internalized homophobia and this lines invokes just that to me. He thinks that being with is wrong, itâs not what God or his family wants from him but when he is with Peter it all clicks together. Being with him is Jasonâs only truth, the only time we can allow his real feelings.
I also want to put this paragraph into contrast with the final version:
âOnce upon a time All I needed was his hand in mine And we knew it all but Now I know not what I do I bow my head and turn to Youâ (03:12-03:29)
I feel like the early version of the song is much more about Jason and his relationship with Peter than Jason and his relationship to the catholic church.
So letâs end this post with the only two differences between the 2004 and the 2007 version:
The so hard ending was actually still in the show during the Off-Broadway Previews
âItâs so hardâ (03:29-03:43)
During the official 2004 NYC run the ending of the song was like this:
âAll I needed was your hand in mine, Then I lost my way And now I know not what Iâd do I bow my head and turn to youâ (03:43 -04:08)
In the album Jason says âhis handâ whereas here Jason says âyour handâ so he is actually talking to Peter, and that prolly has a reason but itâs 1 am and my brain is dead
One last quick note: I do these lyrics by ear so they may not be 100% accurate since English isnât my first language!Â
And thatâs all we had for you today kids! Hit like and reblog if you enjoyed, drop a comment for a suggestion of what the next song should be and goodniiiight (yes I read that in my head the voice of a youtuber adfdfd)
#bare: a pop opera#bare a rock musical#bapo#b: apo#bare musical#jason mcconnell#audio#y'all this song istg#you shouldn't not take a deep dive into this song this impacted my headspace so so much#but wow#damon intrabartolo your mind#also bring back the ever after line blease#musical: bare#fun fact the audio folder is saved in my lapop as sent help and that's accurate asf
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