#so idkkkkk might try again.

[tetedurfarm]

ugly babies! it's a shame that one charlie would not stop leaning because she was fairly cute. her loin is definitely nicer than her sister's at least.

still not sure who i'm keeping; they're still young. them all being does is nice, though.

[cherry-jamm]

Perhaps Batman(2022) comfort? Gn if possible :D

Sick and the City

・❥・description: You woke up sick, good thing your boyfriend can take such good care of you

・❥・word count: .6k

・❥・warnings: sick fic, not proof read (sorry), Bruce like half picks you up and one point? (But he’s also Batman so it’s not a stretch no matter your size)

・❥・We are so back, thank you so much for the request feel free to re-request if u don’t like this 🤍 I was wondering though if y’all would still like me if I did more hc focused content, just as a way to get things out quicker n stuff idkkkkk

Gray sheets curled around your legs like twisting vines. A thin layer of sweat covered your entire body, yet somehow you were still freezing. You tossed and turned in the king sized bed, your body betraying you as no position was comfortable. You lifted your head for barely a second to search for your boyfriend, who should have been home by now. However you immediately laid your head back down, already feeling dizzy from just the slight movement.

As your weary eyes scanned the room you saw a faint glow from behind the bathroom door. Meaning that either you had forgotten to turn the lights off, or Bruce was home. Almost a minute later you got your answer. The bathroom door slid open, spreading light into the dim bedroom. Bruce, the ever attentive man he was, immediately noticed your awoken state.

“Did I wake you up?” His low raspy voice asked, laced with concern. There would have been no obvious indicator to any outside observer that Bruce had been fighting in the streets merely hours ago, other than some stubborn eyeshadow that stuck to his waterline, and well hidden bruises that covered his body in a mix of blueish purple and yellowing brown. You look at him with a pout, tears welling in your painfully dry eyes.

“No.” You croaked. “Are you hurt?” You coughed into your fist, feeling like your throat might collapse. Bruce made an unreadable face before approaching you in the bed.

“I’m fine.” He assured you quickly. An unspoken question hung in the air. ‘Are you?’ Instead of responding you turned onto your side, your position once again turning uncomfortable. “You’re sick.” He points out the obvious. “I’ll sleep on the couch.” You groan, craving your boyfriend’s naturally cool body temperature. He smiles, just slightly and crawls into the bed beside you, keeping a fair distance. You frown at the separation but continue contorting your body to find a position that doesn’t feel uncomfortable.

Eventually you settled yourself with your back pressed against Bruce’s side. You slipped in and out of sleep, each time you regained consciousness you were more tired than the last. After one thankfully long session of sleep you woke with an intense tremor that had your eyes welling with tears from the pain your own body inflicted upon itself. “Shh, you’re okay.” Bruce’s soft words washed over you like a cool tide. His cold hand ran down your arm, then back up to your shoulder, then to the back of your neck. You shivered, yet the feeling was addictively relieving. “Are you awake?” You nodded. “Want me to get you a glass of water?” You debated in your head if the feeling of his chilled hands on your boiling body was worth more than water to you. After a minute you nodded again. “I’ll be right back.” He pressed a chaste kiss to your shoulder and walked out of the room quietly. In his absence you threw your blankets off of yourself and weakly make yourself to the bathroom to find some tissues.

You’re still standing in the bathroom, trying to regain enough strength to make it to the bed, when Bruce comes back. He holds in his hands your large blue water bottle filled with ice water. “Come back to bed.” He urges.

“I will.”

“Here.” Without a second warning he grabs your waist and half carries you to your shared bed. He doesn’t get in until he senses that you’re comfortable, then he climbs in after you. “You’ll be okay.” He assured again. “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

[megamind2010]

Has anyone heard about nell bishop 2, 5, 6, 16, 19, 20

no idk who that is

2. What's something about your OC that people wouldn't expect just from looking at them? ummm sheeeeee is kind of super sentimentallll <3 and believes in the existence of true looooveeeee <33 hehe ^_^ there is indeed a very beautiful soft gooey centre right down deep in his heart much to his own chagrin and much to the surprise of people around him

5. How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want? mm… they can be pretty singleminded when it gets down to it. they arent afraid of putting themselves in danger for something important to them, and at the end of the day even (their own) death is in their mind.. sort of a regrettable necessity? in terms of breaking laws/hurting others, nell doesnt put any inherent value in laws just by virtue of them being laws & also they ARE a vigilante which have always been in a legal grey area. hurting innocents is a no-no but idkkkkk in a dire situation pushed to her limit nell could get into some overly cruel tactics in taking down villains (thinkingface)

6. How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass? unsurprisingly nell is quite stubborn and resistant to manipulation under most circumstances… she hates being told what to do& hates other people thinking they know better than her. so if the manipulation came in the form of someone trying to convince her of a course of action she would dig her heels in on principle. but if it was like, putting him in a situation where the only way out is to do something morally reprehensible… hmm. nell would rather let himself come to harm if that was the tradeoff but if it was like, her family or ted (…..or casey) in danger thenngnhhnngfnhgnnhnhnnn YOURE PUTTING LADYBUG IN A HYDRAULIC PRESS YOU MONSTER!!!!!!!!!!!!! Would really really really take some severe pressure but maybe you could force her into doing something she hated. maybe. idk

16. What is your OC's pain tolerance like? pretty good + aided by the fact that nell does not externalise almost any emotion or reaction.. not superhuman levels or anything but she's gotten a bit used to the kinds of things that happen when youre a non-powered vigilante hero

19. How does your OC behave when enraged? i think ive talked before about how nell doesnt tend to show their anger much until it hits a breaking point… big fan of "not getting angry" and then throwing her shoe at casey's head. when ENRAGED? might raise her voice above a monotone (big warning sign), frowns even more than usual, gets REALLYYY NASTY with what she says. if the situation suits then she will tend to simply Leave rather than just rage at someone… again its pretty difficult to actually get a rise out of her unless your name is casey

20. Does your OC have a tendency to get jealous? If so, how does this manifest? youre a sicko for asking this one btw. in most cases no. and nell would like to believe and like to have others believe that he isnt a jealous person. because thats a stupid and insecure way to feel tbh. if i was jealous i simply wouldnt be. . …………………… except for in some edge cases where nell might feel her "relationship" might be "threatened" or some stupid bullshit like that. in which case she. um. very maturely ignores it and then takes it out on the cause of the annoying emotion i.e. poor innocent casey who wasnt even doing anything wrong

[areafiftydun]

y’all want some tea??

my father disappeared from my life almost 11 years ago, a week after my birthday. went no contact with him cause the way it happened was literally traumatic and to this day i am still dealing with the consequences of it.

a few weeks into the new year i followed my older half sis on instagram, we’d lost contact years ago and i wanted to try to build a relationship again but she’d been inactive for years.

tell me why she posted a story, i open it and it’s her sons graduation so i start liking away. next picture loads up and it’s my fucking dad with my nephew at his graduation. i am literally shocked, i thought nigga might be dead by now idk.

now i kinda wanna block and unfollow her lmao. she’s allowed to be in contact with him but i don’t want him to perceive me at all, which might happen since she def got the like notifs from me. like what if she shows him my account? idkkkkk

[bcdwhcre]

“The Spiders.” Kurapika x Chrollo x Reader

Ship: Kurapika x Chrollo x Reader

Summary: Being close friends with Kurapika, you tried your best to help him with his mission on defeating the Phantom Troupe but you soon found yourself in a situation with the leader of the spiders.

Warning: nothing just cursing, hints of violence.

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You found yourself inside the hall where the auction was supposed to be held in. You fixed the suit you wore, slightly uncomfortable with having to wear such a fancy outfit that Kurapika insisted on instead of a simple fancy dress. It wasn’t exactly ideal but you knew you were supposed to be under cover to make Kurapika feel more at ease with you tagging along.

It actually took a lot of convincing. He wanted to work alone and you didn’t want to accept that. You knew deep down that he was going to end up getting hurt or killed from doing this mission. He dug himself in such a deep hole that you didn’t want him to be alone, you wanted to help him and you did whatever it took to do that and for him to accept the help.

“Keep an eye out, they should be here soon.” You heard Kurapika’s voice through the earpiece, nodding your head as you stood by the door with your hands in your pockets.

Soon you seen three people walk in with suits, the auction already had begun so you knew that these weren’t just average people being late to the most famous auction there was. You furrowed your eyebrows, reaching up to touch the earpiece but someone behind you spoke.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” You froze in your spot, taking a deep breath as the three figures turned to look at you as well as the person behind you.

“Take the earpiece out.” The deep voice said barely over a whisper, making you slowly take it out and turn around to hand it over to him.

He stood there in a suit as well, a headband tied around his forehead and his hair falling over it. A lump formed in your throat, you didn’t know what to say or even do but Kurapika had taught you well on how to defend yourself but should you even risk fighting him?

You didn’t know who he was, was he a spider? Thoughts ran rapidly through your brain before you could even process what was going on until you lunged at him to throw a punch straight to the face but he was quick to dodge and grab you by the throat, lifting you off the ground.

Your feet dangled and as you struggled against his grip, the small wig on your head had fallen down to the floor- letting your long hair fall over your shoulders and that’s when he dropped you before you could pass out.

You gasped for air, staring at the floor with tears burning in your eyes from the lack of oxygen. Your vision was almost blurry and you could only think of Kurapika, how disappointed he’ll be.

“Get up.” He spoke again causing you to slowly get up and take a good look at him again, your face red.

“Feitan, tie her up and hide her in the closet.” You turned your head to look at the guy, who was walking towards you— Feitan.

You couldn’t help but stare at them, all of them but the one tying you up and the one that was choking you had caught your eyes longer than they should. As you felt yourself being tied and some fabric being tied around your mouth, you were soon trapped inside the closet, waiting for a few moments before gently moving your fingers to touch the bracelet Kurapika had given you incase of emergencies, it’ll ping his bracelet and give him your location.

Kurapika had given you this bracelet right when you started helping him, to feel safe and make sure you’re protected first above all. You were his best friend, he could’ve risk losing you.

•

It had been over an hour but soon the closet flung open, Kurapika’s eyes meeting yours in the suit and long wig he wore to make himself look completely different. He leaned down, quickly untying you and taking the fabric out of your mouth.

“I caught him, the leader of the troupe— Chrollo. But are you alright? Did they hurt you?” He rambled, racking his eyes over you to make sure there weren’t any wounds or bruises and his eyes stopped at your neck where a bruise was forming from when you were being choked.

“Who did it?” He grew angry and you stood up, giving him a tight hug to somewhat calm him down.

“I don’t know his name.. but he was giving orders to... Feitan?” You repeated the only name that had came up and Kurapika stared down at you before dragging you out of the place and into the backseat of a car.

Your eyes widen when you had seen the guy from earlier but this time.. without the bandage around his forehead and he was wearing a different outfit. This was the man that was choking you. You couldn’t help but stare, shifting slightly as you sat between him and Kurapika. You started to grow nervous.

Everything was going so fast, you felt as if time was going 100mph and all of a sudden the headlights shining towards the car you all sat in came closer until it caused the car to flip sideways multiple times. At first you had felt Kurapika’s grip on you then it suddenly went away, as you tried to move your head— the pounding inside of it getting harder as you tried to breathe normally but only feeling pain in your chest. You tried to look over at Kurapika, the blood rolling down his face and you heard the door being ripped off the other side.

“Took you long enough.” Chrollo had groaned in pain, getting him out of the car and you were quick to try to slip out, grabbing onto his wrist tightly.

You were the only one conscious, you knew you couldn’t take on Chrollo and his members by yourself but you had to at least try to, for Kurapika. One of the members tried to strike you down but Chrollo had stopped them, an idea popping into his head.

“Take her. She might be good use to us.” He shrugged, grabbing your hand and raising you up on your feet and out of the car.

Your were trying to keep your eyes open, your body ached and your head was pounding non stop. It was causing you to slowly pass out but you didn’t want to. As you felt someone lift you up, your eyes began to get more blurry and your eyes tried to focus on the man carrying you, all you could make out was the tattoo that sat on his forehead before you became unconscious.

He didn’t know why he was taking you with, he could’ve simply left you behind to die in that car knowing how weak you were but when you still tried to fight, he looked at you a bit differently. He admired the commitment and admired the fact you don’t give up so easily even when you have obviously lost.

“Hm,” Chrollo had hummed to himself again, sitting in the back of the car and looked over at you as you slumped over and practically slept.

You were a interesting character, he thought, but what if you could be more value to him. He sat there and thought it over multiple times before glancing down at the book in his hands but he couldn’t exactly focus, his mind stuck on you. You could be much more than what you are, he knows he can use you for a lot of big things— even including having leverage over the chain user himself.

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idkkkkk anymore

I take requests!

• Masterlist

[killerqueenjoy]

99 Question Tag

okay okay I know i got tagged to do this like a month ago on my main blog by @santonicababy iM SORRY LIN ILY BUT THIS WAS SO DAMN LONG

1) DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR CLOSET DOORS OPEN OR CLOSED

I sleep in the room where everybodies closets are and they all gotta be closed goddamn do you know how spooky it is to even have one open during the night

2) DO YOU TAKE THE SHAMPOOS AND CONDITIONER BOTTLES FROM HOTELS

my parents do, but alas I don't use them in case they have silicones or sulphates in them because I got a whole lotta curls to protect

3)DO YOU SLEEP WITH YOUR SHEETS TUCKED IN OR OUT?

if this refers to the sheet protecting the mattress, then my answer is in because how the fuck would you be able to sleep with that moving around???

4) HAVE YOU STOLEN A STREET SIGN BEFORE

NO SORRY IM BORING

5)DO YOU LIKE TO USE POST IT NOTES

heck yeah, but for random shit

6) DO YOU EVER CUT OUT COUPONS BUT THEN NEVER USE THEM

nee my parents are fancy fuckers who use the coupons on their phone (our local supermarket has a damn app skskksksk)

7) WOULD YOU RATHER BE ATTACKED BY A BIG BEAR OR A SWARM OF BEES

a bear because its one giant son of a bitch and not millions of tiny motherfuckers and also I've never been stung by a bee and intend to keep it that way because majority of my family seem to be allergic

8) DO YOU HAVE FRECKLES

nope! I have a couple beauty spots on my hands and face but thats kinda it

9) DO YOU ALWAYS SMILE FOR PICTURES

not really but if I've been told to smile then its 200% dead inside

10) WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST PET PEEVE

i find many things annoying

11)DO YOU EVER COUNT YOUR STEPS WHEN YOU WALK

only when i go up and down stairs, but i also try to make sure i step with each foot equally (if that makes sense) and i step on only certain colour tiles when im bored

12) HAVE YOU EVER PEED IN THE WOODS

the real question is have i ever been in the woods? both answers are no

13) HAVE YOU EVER POOPED IN THE WOODS

refer to question 12

14)ummmm idk what this question is meant to be curse you Lin

15)DO YOU CHEW YOUR PENS AND PENCILS

nope, the idea weirds me out

16) HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU SLEPT WITH THIS WEEK

none, this week and in general

17) WHAT SIZE IS YOUR BED

one person and a long yet smol doggo size

18) WHAT IS YOUR SONG OF THE WEEK

Eddie from the Rocky Horror Picture Show has been stuck in my head for the whole week so yeah i guess that

19)IS IT OKAY FOR GUYS TO WEAR PINK

HeLL YEAH DUDE HAVE YOU SEEN RAMI MALEK IN PINK

SKSKSKSKS END MY LIFE

but yeah, anyone can wear anything they want to wear (although a suit made out of meat might not be wise)

20) DO YOU STILL WATCH CARTOONS

dudeeeee scooby doo and tom and jerry are my jam I watch them on the regular (among other things)

21)WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVOURITE MOVIE

uhhm idkkkkk I tend to repress bad movies sksksk

22)WHERE WOULD YOU BURY HIDDEN TREASURE IF YOU HAD SOME

idk shove it in the closet ig at least it will be hidden behind my sexuality

23)WHAT DO YOU DRINK WITH DINNER

I usually only drink before or after but ig water??? cooldrink if I'm in a restaurant

24)WHAT DO YOU DIP A CHICKEN NUGGET IN

depends on the nug

25)WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FOOD

How dare you assume i only have one favourite

tbh it depends cos i love pizza and pasta and stuff but then i cannot live with my granny's curries ksksmks

26) WHAT MOVIES COULD YOU WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND STILL LOVE

borhap, sing street, rhps, the natm movies, the harry potter movies, any mcu movies

27)LAST PERSON YOU KISSED/KISSED YOU

ahhahahahahahha bold of you to assume anyone wants to do that

28) WERE YOU EVER A BOY/GIRL SCOUT

nope but I was a catrobat which is basically my preschools acrobatics team that was actually really terrible

29)WOULD YOU EVER STRIP OR POSE NUDE IN A MAGAZINE

nahh m8

30) WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU WROTE A LETTER TO SOMEONE ON PAPER

this week for a transactional task at school (It was in Afrikaans and I got a C skskskks)

31)CAN YOU CHANGE THE OIL IN A CAR

omg no

32)EVER GOTTEN A SPEEDING TICKET

not old enough to drive!

33)EVER RAN OUT OF GAS

my parents never have for as long as i can remember

34)WHATS YOUR FAVOURITE KINDA SANDWHICH

cheese because I am actually John Deacon

35)BEST THING TO EAT FOR BREAKFAST

MUFFINS!!!!

36)WHAT IS YOUR USUAL BEDTIME

school nights its 11pm otherwise i dont have one lol

37)ARE YOU LAZY

YES BUT MY LAZINESS MAKES ME ANXIOUS OOF

38)WHEN YOU WERE A KID WHAT DID YOU DRESS UP AS FOR HALLOWEEN

we dont celebrate that here but i rly want to it seems fun!

39)WHAT IS YOUR CHINESE ASTROLOGICAL SIGN

Ram, which is really cool because im an Aries, so I'm sheep squared

40)HOW MANY LANGUAGES CAN YOU SPEAK

English, Afrikaans (at a basic highschool level), I could speak very vERY basic isiZulu when I was younger but I'm not sure about now, I know a bit of French and Telugu, and I'm gonna start learning Hindi soon!!

41) DO YOU HAVE ANY MAGAZINE SUBSCRIPTIONS

nee

42) WHICH ARE BETTER, LEGOS OR LINCOLN LOGS

i didn't play much with legos and i have no idea what the second one is rip

43)ARE YOU STUBBORN

to an extent

44)WHO IS BETTER, LENO OR LETTERMAN

I kept reading Leno as Lenin ffs

45)EVER WATCH SOAP OPERAS

I watch them occasionally with my granny, but I don't keep up with them very well (Kasamh Se is my shit tho)

46)ARE YOU AFRAID OF HEIGHTS

no, im afraid of falling in general tho

47) DO YOU SING IN THE CAR

My dad and I bop frequently to Never Gonna Give You Up in the car, and also classic bollywood songs (we have even learnt the choreography for some)

48)DO YOU SING IN THE SHOWER

i perform

49) DO YOU DANCE IN THE CAR

well theres not exactly much space

50)EVER USED A GUN

nope

51)LAST TIME YOU GOT A PORTRAIT TAKEN BY A PHOTOGRAPHER

not sure

52)DO YOU THINK MUSICALS ARE CHEESY

most are but thats why i like them

53) IS CHRISTMAS STRESSFUL

we don't celebrate because we're not Christian (we still eat a lot and exchange presents tho), but it can get stressful if we have to visit extended family, mostly because my extended family loves to insult everything about me so thats great!

54)EVER EAT A PIEROGI

not i good sir

55) FAVOURITE TYPE OF FRUIT PIE

never had one, it doesnt appeal to me

56) OCCUPATIONS YOU WANTED TO BE WHEN YOU WERE A KID

a vet

57)DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS

i am a ghost

58)EVER HAD A DEJA-VU FEELING

not that i remember

59)DO YOU TAKE A VITAMIN DAILY

yes, I take a multi vitamin, a vitamin D pill because I'm vitamin D deficient, and im not sure if this is a vitamin or not but i take evening primrose oil so that im not outwardly a bitch due to pms

60)DO YOU WEAR SLIPPERS

i wear slipper socks, because my doggo got jealous of my doggie slippers and murdered them in cold blood

61)DO YOU WEAR A BATH ROBE

i have one and rarely use it because i forget it exists

62)WHAT DO YOU WEAR TO BED

a random shirt and pants, though ive been known to kick pants off (ive been doing that since birth), occasionally i manage to get the matching pj set

63)WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT

ive unfortunately never been to a concert before

64)WALMART TARGET OR KMART

ive never seen any of these stores in my country

65)NIKE OR ADIDAS

i own neither

66) CHEETOS OR FRITOS

neither

67)PEANUTS OR SUNFLOWER SEEDS

Peanuts because thats my doggos name!

68) EVER HEARD OF THE GROUP TRES BIEN

no sorry

69)EVER TAKE DANCE LESSONS

i went to a bhangra class for about a year, and we performed for our parents at the end of that year (i was in one of the few groups that didnt have to dance in lehengas thank goodness)

70)IS THERE A PROFESSION YOU PICTURE

YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE DOING

probably something creative, but I don't mind as long as they're happy with what they're doing and its not harming others!

71)CAN YOU CURL YOUR TONGUE

yep

72)EVER WON A SPELLING BEE

never entered one, having to spell out loud makes me anxious

73)HAVE YOU EVER CRIED BECAUSE YOU WERE SO HAPPY

i think so

74)OWN ANY RECORD ALBUMS

nope

75)OWN A RECORD PLAYER

i wish

76)DO YOU REGULARLY BURN INCENSE

my granny burns incense while I'm at school because my mom and i both get really sick when its just been lit and the smell is strong. Going to the temple is a damn nightmare because of it

77)EVER BEEN IN LOVE

no, too busy fangirling

78)WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE IN CONCERT

oof a long list

Queen, Twenty One Pilots, Waterparks, Frank Iero and the Future Violents (ffs fronk stop changin the name), Panic! at the Disco...to name a few

79)WHAT WAS THE LAST CONCERT YOU SAW

refer to question 63

80)HOT TEA OR COLD TEA

both

81)TEA OR COFFEE

coffee

82)SUGAR COOKIES OR SNICKERDOODLES

sugar cookies

83)CAN YOU SWIM WELL

i wouldn't drown, but im no professional either

84)CAN YOU HOLD YOUR BREATH WITHOUT HOLDING YOUR NOSE

im doing it right now

85)ARE YOU PATIENT

eh

86)DJ OR BAND AT A WEDDING

I've only ever been to Hindi,Tamil and Telugu weddings and lemme tell you 90% of the time bands flop at those weddings because they can't sing the classics without failing miserably, so DJs are generally better. However, in that case, if a band can perform those songs, then I'd prefer a band ig

87)EVER WON A CONTEST

yep, a couple of reading contests

88)HAVE YOU EVER HAD PLASTIC SURGERY

nope, not planning on it

89)WHICH ARE BETTER, BLACK OR GREEN OLIVES

dont like olives rip

90)CAN YOU KNIT OR CROCHET

i can knit!

in fact, my friends and i are so cool that we're in our schools knitting club (which besides myself, @grandfunnyemopainter and @imjustabruh , only has 2 other members)

91)BEST ROOM FOR A FIREPLACE

lounge or study/library

92)DO YOU WANT TO GET MARRIED

i guess, its not on my goal list tho

93)IF MARRIED, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED

no

94)WHO WAS YOUR HIGHSCHOOL CRUSH

currently in highschool, and in love with the borhap cast, sebastian stan, stephanie beatriz and band members (theres more but yeah)

95)DO YOU CRY AND THROW A FIT UNTIL YOU GET YOUR OWN WAY

nope, i have only two ways to deal, be a total pushover or a total bitch

96)DO YOU HAVE KIDS

nope

97)DO YOU WANT KIDS

kind of undecided, but i do want more pets

98)WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOUR

Dark Blue

99)DO YOU MISS ANYONE RIGHT NOW

my dog, shes been ignoring me for about four hours now because I stayed at school for an extra hour (for knitting club!)

@softspaceboibrian @roger-taylor-owns-my-wigg @im-inlovewithmycar do it cowards

[talkfantasytome]

I'm baaaaack. And I finished the series. 👀 There was no time to keep updating this, clearly, I had important work to do in devouring the books. But, I did provide some thoughts to my friends as I went (though fewer with each book, I think, cause I got a bit wrapped up), please enjoy if you'd like:

p.s. I apologize for all the emojis...the more shocked and shook and squealing I get, the more they come out. And a lot of this stuff is about those feelings. lol

The Cruel Prince

ew, gross....the idea Balekin would try to marry his sister 🤮

and he's using the geas on her *siiiiigh *...like, I get it, it's smart, and that's not a horrific command (yet), but like...sucks for Jude. it's the one thing she wants

okay, I think I like Roach lol. I'm really hoping for a big brother type character in him, maybe 👀

also, her reflection on Madoc was so sweet 💕 or, as sweet as it can be for "I mean, he was riding us to a new land right after murdering our parents"

but, like, it's in these reflections we see more of Madoc...it's kinda a tell vs. a show, but I think it's necessary to help us see the way he raised them, so that when we deal with him being stubborn (for example) we can come to our own conclusions about him vs. just "he's stubborn" and now knowing any background

oh gosh, so much to unpack in chapter 14!

I change my mind - I like Ghost the most, I want him to be big brother

Locke...oh my gosh Locke...I'm so skeptical of him, it just seems too easy, too quick and everything. but, at the same time, *swoooooon *

but, whooooo is Taryn's guy???? omg...no way it's Cardan, not after she kept being like "not Cardan not Cardan"...it's never who the main person expects...usually 👀 plus, how could Taryn say "I think you'll like him", and why would Cardan say he wouldn't be the first to green her dresses...like...that's not something you say about someone you're entangled with, and fairies can't lie....but still, it has to be someone fairly high up if they're going to declare at the coronation

I'm terrified it might be Dain 👀 OH, BUT WHAT IF IT'S THE GHOST?! (later thought: wow, just look at me semi-casually predicting something that will get hinted at during the latter part of the last book and not even realizing it 'til I go back over these 😂) That would be so cute, but no way, cause none of the other shadows have any place in Court....so, yeah, scared it's Dain. But, that seems almost too high up...but idkkkkkk

it could be Cardan, I guess Ms. shifty eyes 👀 but, like...I saw the page FILLED with Jude's name...poor boy's got it bad! (to explain, my friend reacted to the bullet about Carden with a 👀)

you don't write someone's name over and over if they're an enemy....you might a couple times, or one really annoyed scribble, but just that name over and over, shoved in a mortal book....oh Cardan

is he gonna be the definition of a boy who can't express his feelings to he bullies the girl instead? 👀

friend: "it's a complicated dynamic"

me again: I mean, I can tell 😂 but it will get more complicated if he is the guy...I hope that's not the case, I don't wanna deal with that, that's too much 😩 it also, like, would add sooooo much needing to be unpacked in a romance way vs. plot way, and since I'm not supposed to be approaching this as a romance (again, heavily skeptical on this advice at the moment 😂), idkkkkk...it feels wrong...also, why would she marry someone who's bullied her so much? like, they pick on Taryn, too

especially considering how much she seemed to distrust Locke....

"If that's what he did to the paper, I shudder to think what he wants to do to me."

^^ *evil laugh*

look, every time I write something like that, it definitely ends up coming back to bite the character in the ass....literally 😏

interesting, no more instances after the fruit

Cardan telling Jude he thinks she and Locke are perfect for each other 👀

ngl, this has me more curious about Locke...cause I think Cardan sees more of Jude than she realizes...so I'm like 👀

OMG OMG OMG

"I like for things to happen, for stories to unfold. And if I can't find a good enough story, I make one."

GURL RUN!

this explains so much

Locke sees how Jude gets under Cardan skin and he's like "oh, I could have some fun here"...I could be wrong, obviously, but I do not trust this information

this is why he's got fox features 👀

well, that's one way to end a chapter..."Because of me, she killed herself" 😭

I do not like Dain. And I'm starting to think it's only one letter off from Cain for a reason

Ohhhhh shit. She killed him! 😱 I mean, it was self-defense, but ohhhhh shit

I did love her deciding she'd become worse than the faeries though 😈

Also, Locke being very weird...I did wonder early on if he was Taryn's guy...but I couldn't imagine that being possible with him and Jude being so public. I still don't think it is, but I am SUS

Oh YESSSSS! Cardan cutting in...why am I happy about this?! 😂😂 stupid authors

Ugh, so short, wtf...I just need some answers!!!!

😱😱😱

I need to stop not trusting my gut, it would seem 👀👀

HE JUST WANTED TO MAKE THE PROPOSAL MORE DRAMATIC! I'm guessing, as I've only read that taryn tucked some hair behind his ear. But wtf Taryn?!?!

Oh, but, now I want this, cause Jude is sooooo close to just going batshit, and I love that for her 😈

Hmmm...Cardan missing from the dais 👀

Lol, Cardan getting drunk after Jude confirms she hates him...probs nothing, but imma read more into it cause I need that for my girl

I'm now remembering Taryn's promise about how good in stories is followed by bad 👀

Oh no oh no oh noooo

friend: Cue hello darkness my old friend song?

me: No...definitely something more rock

Balekin just stabbed his sister!

friend: Highway to Hell? 👀

me: Def better 😂

😱 Madoc!!! I mean, obvs with everything happening it was clear he was working with Balekin, but 😱😱

I want to believe he has a good reason for this

Welp

Martin gave us the red wedding, Holly has now given us the red coronation...or red almost-coronation since Balekin can't wear the crown 😂

friend: *rains of castamere playing in the background* (I gave her a 💯 for that)

I just, like....😐

I mean, at least with a book, you see more, feel more, but still

Seeing Madoc have the family be pulled away...he probably wanted Jude to be, too

so, this will be ... interesting

oh no! it ruined Jude's dress! 😭 (I am now more upset about this knowing Cardan gave it to her 😭)

also, like, if Cardan and Jude don't get out of the palace together...well...then that's stupid

oh, baby boy growing speechless when she puts her hair down and wild!

I am all for that

"As for what he wants to keep from the revel, it could be anything."

IT'S YOU

omg, that was the most honest thing he said, ya silly!

����‍♀��

and now she's threatening him *sighhhhh

"...the irrational panic when I touch his skin."

so blind

Taryn 😒

OMG...wait...Oak...Oriana has an acorn...the message talked about getting "him" out...it wouldn't have been Locke...omg...

I was right...I feel so smart...took Jude a whole page longer 👀

oh dear, did Cardan speak to them of Jude as if they're friends? oldest faux pas in the book! 😂

so, like, she's gonna have Oak crown Cardan, right?

omg, she kissed him! but, like, ahhhhhhh! he is jealous, though not that she's human, but hates her most cause he likes her (of course), and apparently that's gross (guess she has cooties)

I feel like she's half kissing him just to annoy him and I love that 😂

I was right about oak crowning Cardan...but I don't feel good about it 👀

And that's it for The Cruel Prince...I forgot how much of a play-by-play I gave them on that. 😂

The Wicked King

Ughhh, I just need them to, like, kiss and...I guess kiss more? They don't seem like the type to make up 😂 He asked her to, she didnt, cause Jude is dumb.

Me constantly with Jude and Cardan:

Welp, I got my wish and now I may be a bit flushed 👀

I wanna say that's going to change the relationship a lot, but with them you never know...Cardan got turned on by her saying she hates him...he lost it when she said she hates him so much it's sometimes all she can think about 😂

She heated when he said he wanted to tell her so many lies 👀

Though, I am curious about what lies he wanted to say, cause I wanna know the truth

Like...he wants her to tell him she hates him...maybe he wants to say the same but can't 👀

I'm freaking out, okay! They just had sex, and Jude, it seems, lost her virginity with it. And it was hot but also, like, true enemies-to-lovers in that they were enemies and then they had sex... (Based on a scene in the third book, I may have been slightly wrong about this, pending your definition of sex...)

talk about a slowwww burn...like, they kiss...still burning, though

had sex...still feels like its the burn phase 😂

Omg Ghost...NOOOOOO! 😭😭😭

If Cardan doesn't get all lose-his-shit-crazy about Jude being taken...

Oh my gosh

Cardan. NO.

Wtf is this shit (and that's where I left my friends before going to sleep, I wake up to:)

friend 1: What's happening? Are you okay? :O

friend 2: Kasey, did you survive the night reading? 👀

me: No 👀

I finished the wicked king

I'm not okay

The Queen of Nothing

And now there's some prophecy that Cardan's blood has to be spilt, and I'm pissed at him but i dun want him to die and I really hope blood spilt doesn't mean dying

But like...why?!?! 😩

Ugh, they just need to admit they're in love, however weird that love is. 😒

Okay, so a) duh Jude, of course Cardan knew it was you. we all knew he would.

B) letters?!?!?! Djidjsydka omg what letters?! (don't worry, I have found the letters)

C) Cardan fighting hard to keep Madoc from "saving Taryn", aka taking Jude 🥺

But fuck you Madoc, you and your crap timing. You couldn't have waited?!

Also, that Jude didn't realize he knew when he was like "I'll just examine her privately *wags eyebrows*

Like, I knew he'd know or figure it out, but that was just such a clear sign

Woooo! Finally Jude is recognized [as queen] - after he comes to get her 🥺

How is it that they're married, have declared it to the world, and it STILL feels like I'm in the slow burn? 😒

I'm confused...did they not have sex in the second book? Did he just...use his hands? the scene wasn't explicit, but the way it was written...

friend 1: They def did as far as I know

friend 2: and I interpreted it as they had sexy times yes 👀 lol

me: Yeah, but I just got to that in book 3, and she's all, like, "sex big deal"

So...now I'm thinking they just had some fun with fingers 👀 it did say something about his hand going between her thighs

[my conclusion is yes, just fingers in second book, but I feel justified that everyone thought as I did 😂]

Also, though, I just love that she's a top 😂

welp...Cardan is a snake

literally

Jude just heard the prophecy (I stopped in the middle of the chapter), and I have a theory:

the prophecy says that through the spilling of Cardan's blood, a great ruler will rise. Grimsen said only death can stop the snake

I thinkkkk, that in killing the snake, Cardan will rise again from the spilling of his own blood.

That's my theory...seems crazy, but, I mean...since the ruination of the throne and destruction of the crown were literal...maybe the "rising" is too

another theory/possibility: Jude somehow dies, but that brings Cardan back and through him spilling his blood in some way he saves her, but she is also "reborn" as a faerie

idk...not that there's much hinting to that, but that could be her rising, or them rising together...idk how I feel about her not remaining mortal, but it seems plausible she'd want that to happen some way (the author)...if there's an HEA, that is

I was right

once again, I am a genius

I'm so glad it was the first one

I also enjoyed Jude's thought about wanting to make out with Cardan's face 😂

And, that how I ended my live updates. It's so long, I was very active during book one. 😂

Finally Reading 'The Cruel Prince'!

Yes, you heard that right! 😄 I'm about 12-13 chapters in and I'm invested!

Now, I present to you my real-time thoughts/commentary, as sent to some friends in slack as my form of "live-tweeting". I am tagging with "the cruel prince spoilers", for those that don't want to see these.

I will also note that I am reading this with the knowledge that Jurdan is a thing on some level...whether I just follow people that like that ship and it's not canon, or it is canon, I have yet to find out and have now appropriately blocked those tags (and some other books, but I need to work on that cause I keep getting these types of spoilers 😫).

On chapter 4. I like Locke.

Tournament happened, loved her little speech, I hope Cardan understands the irony. But, considering they're, like, allergic to iron or whatever, I'm guessing not. (Sorry, not sorry, I think I'm hilarious.)

Locke is a secret sweetie, and it's so cute! But I can't figure him out. He's reading Cardan well, and still giving Jude smiles that thrill her...I really don't want some weird love triangle. But I'm hopeful cause I was told to not approach this book as a romance.

Also, mortal land chapter...dayum gurl. I can't remember if this is the one that has a sort of corruption arc, but it feels plausible and I'm here for it.

And Cardan sucks, but their conversations keep just sounding like heavy dom talk and I blame my friend on tumblr and her stupid, glorious toxic Nessian AU (we all know who, but I won't tag her cause she hasn't read this yet)

Omg, the prince wanting her to lie. Do it again! 😂😂

Also, PHEW! I honestly thought Dain or whatever was about to ask Jude to be his wife...but just his spy!

I hope she accepts

Yesssss!

Oh fuck

He can control her

I'm happy and worried...like, madoc's not there, there's a reason, and idk that it's good

WAIT! Is HE gonna turn out to be the cruel prince??? 👀

Awww...Locke wants to see her again. 🥰 But Cardan was furious and then stabbed her finger to help her become disenchanted or whatever...👀

Clearly Jude doesn't understand she's in a book when she enters Cardan's room. From the moment she mentioned annotated papers and piles of books I was like "I betttt"

Then Alice in Wonderland - so obvious, but she had to see the clothes 👀

Struggling a bit with the way some things are written. Like, it's right, but certain things given early on imply something other than the way the world is actually built and, like, it just seems like it could've been an easy thing to avoid. But it's pretty minor.

Response to a friend who said Cardan has mostly been "kind of being a dick" up to this point: Always being a dick 😂

They're all scheming! What's up with Balekin?? I thought he was also a drunk?? But instead he is trying to teach Cardan by abusing him? And why must these dark characters always have some deep horrors. Is it too much to ask for a dick to just be a dick and have her fall for him anyway?

I'm sure I'll update more later when I have time to read again.

[squigglyness]

Get to know me (Tag)

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people.

aw thanks @comfortablysarcasticslytherintj lov u okay also this is So Many help

LAST: 1. Drink: wAteR 2. Phone call: mom.. 3. Text message: idk i don’t remember to text back 4. Song you listen to: all i know is i have a MCR song stuck in my head and idk which one it is 5. Time you cried: either like two days ago or two weeks ago i can’t remember also why is this question ALWAYS included

HAVE YOU: alright u know what lemme just say yes and now let’s just forget this section 6. Dated someone twice:  7. Kissed someone and regretted it: 8. Been cheated on: 9. Lost someone special: 10. Been depressed: 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: 

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 

12. Black

13. Red

14. Green&Gold&White&DarkPurple&Brown

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: Sorta 

16. Fallen out of love: I mean you’d have to fall in love first rite 17. Laughed until you cried: ye 18. Found out someone was talking about you: if i did i don’t remember, it doesn’t really matter 20. Found out who your friends are: is it just me or does this sound childish 21.  Kissed someone on your Facebook list: i don’t have FB tho

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: just rememberd i actually do have facebook and no i know none of them 23. Do you have any pets: i did until i moved and i still have my plants but i consider them children 24. Do you want to change your name: that’d be nice but as long as people don’t use my first name i’m good 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: nothing. my birthday is actually coming up again in like a week and i hope to watch LOTR  26. What time do you wake up: when i’m not overly depressed, 5:30 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Sleeeeeep 28. Name something you can’t wait for: going to sleep, i’m not excited about much these days tbh 29. When was the last time you saw your mom?: last weekend 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: HAHAHA how about being productive without health problems 31. What are you listening to right now: the fan... it’s unusual but i’m actually not listening to music  32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: well my brother 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: having to introduce myself and answer questions and talk about myself almost daily bc i keep meeting new people and they all seem to wanna know everythiiinggg also i hate questions that i don’t have a clear answer on yet, just pls don’t 34. Most visited website: probably google docs lmao  35. Mole/s: u know u watch too many crime shows with ur mom when u immediately think of deep cover agents 36. Mark/s: what does this mean? scars? let’s not 37. Childhood dream: djkfl;d to be a boy and to make art 38. Hair color: i have never in my life been able to decide what color my hair is. i’m just gonna go with goldish brown idk that makes it sound light but it’s not idkkkk 39. Long or short hair: short short short short short  40. Do you have a crush on someone: no no no why would i do that 41. What do you like about yourself?: skin color, complexion, hair, eyes, idk man sometimes i like everythign about me and sometimes the opposite 42. Piercings: 2 on each ear 43. Blood type: idkkkkk 44. Nicknames? Ricky, Ericky, Eric, Ricks, Rosie, (btw pls don’t), Rosa, then what my parents call me, Rica Rose and Rosebud lmao. btw i prefer Rose, or Ricky, that’s fine too 45. Relationship status: jUsT mE 46. Zodiac: cancer 47. Pronouns: any 48. Favorite TV Show: I don’t watch tv much i spend all my time i have to waste reading articles but Doctor Who, Merlin, NCIS bc it’s a tradition in my family, ... 50. Right or left hand: left 51. Surgery: nope 52. Hair dyed in different color: i’ve had red, pink, purple, blonde, brown 53. Sport: lol when i was a kid i did dance and gymnastics (might i say, i was actually really good at that..) and in school i did volleyball (worst semester of my life), track, and powerlifting 55. Vacation: well i’m going to Europe during Christmas with my sisters 56. Pair of trainers: these are shoes right?? tbh i don’t care enough to answer i’m sick rn 

MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: well i’m vegan and let me just say i love mac n cheese 58. Drinking: just water 59. I’m about to: there’s a good chance i’m about to fall asleep here on the floor 62. Want: TO GET IT TOGETHER AND BE THE MOST PRODUCTIVE also i just wanna draw but i can’t get it together enough even to do that 63. Get married: probably out of the question, sigh 64. Career: i just wanna research physics stuff and sell art on the side ok 65. Hugs or kisses: kisses are nice in theory and i don’t understand the purpose of hugs also pls no 66. Lips or eyes: what does this even mean?? if i had one adn not the other that’d be weird. but eyes are nice 67. Shorter or taller: i’m shorter and i have no desire to be tall 68. Older or younger: i think 50-60 is such a beautiful age tbh but i like being my own age too. i can’t wait to have silver hair and be a Wise One like Gandalf. (okay yeah tbh i just wanna be gandalf) 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: i would just prefer to like myself 71. Sensitive or loud: i’m really not either?? 72. Hook up or relationship: neither???? i guess if i had to choose then relationship but only if it’s not a romantic relationship 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: neither really.. 

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a Stranger: why would i do that 75. Drank hard liquor: well if i did i don’t remember  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: when i was a kid i lost so many pairs of glasses my mom is convinced i threw them away 77. Turned someone down: is this not a common thing?? oops 78. Sex on the first date: i’m ace pls 79. Broken someone’s heart: ooooooooops  80. Had your heart broken: lmao yeah 81. Been arrested: noop 82. Cried when someone died: nope 83. Fallen for a friend: how can u fall for someoen who isn’t ur friend

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84: Yourself: yeah  85. Miracles: sure 86. Love at first sight: how many more questions about love are there?? also no that doesn’t even make sense 87. Santa Claus: ?????????????????? 88. Kiss on the first date: i’ve never felt the need to go on a date but if i did i think i would already know the person really well so it wouldn’t be weird so yeah sure buuuuut i’m not goign on any dates so it’s not happening\

OTHER: 90. Current best friend name: ideally, best friends live in the same city as u,,, and i have no friends here really,,,,,, i had a best friend when i was 4-6 tho. i mean. if anyone wants to be my bff lemme know that’d be nice 91. Eye color: dark blue green with gold specks 92. Favorite movie: lmao the lego movie

okay now i have to tag people??i hardly have any friends here on tumblr this is too hard but k lemme try

@iitwillbe @hermionesmenacinglook @introvertentropy @strawberrylovely @seoul-warrior @dont-give-a-bother alright i am 2 sick and 2 tired to finish goodnight

[searchforthescars]

Beautiful

I just really needed Murphy worshipping Emori okay (also tbh might write an E-rated scene but idkkkkk)

It’s almost dawn and Emori still hasn’t slept.

After tossing and turning for hours, she gives up on finding rest. She slips from the covers, careful not to wake John, who snores softly under a mound of blankets. She creeps into the bathroom, pushing the door shut and wincing as it creaks at the hinges. Leaning over the counter, she flicks the light on and squints at her reflection. The shadows under her eyes are startling in the bright light; the wrinkles at their corners are etched deep into her dark skin.

She sleeps in a short-sleeved shirt now, her arms and hands uncovered. She’s trying it, trying to learn how to exist in the skin she hates. It was easier in the Dead Zone when you had to cover your skin or wear a painful burn for weeks. Here, now, it’s harder to find excuses. [Read more on Ao3]

Her eyes trail over the mirror, following the line of her arms. Her gaze lingers on her left hand, every bump and edge of the malformed thing that defines her.

“Hey,” John’s voice is low from sleep. He pokes his head in, narrowing his eyes in the light, and flips the switch off. The low light from the bedroom is enough to illuminate his face. “Come back to bed.”

He wraps his arms around her waist, pressing his chest to her back and brushing a soft kiss over the juncture between her neck and shoulder. She leans her head away, exposing more skin to his lips.

"Admiring the view?" He asks softly, teasingly.

Emori raises an eyebrow, watching it move in the reflection. "Kind of the opposite, John."

He takes her right hand, her good hand, and tangles his fingers in hers, bringing it up to press a kiss to the back of her hand. “Beautiful,” he whispers.

She shakes her head, eyes flitting to the mirror. Compared to the girls he knows, girls with soft bodies like Clarke and story eyes like Raven, she is nothing of comparison.

“Yes,” John disagrees adamantly, kissing her cheek, resting his chin on her shoulder while regarding her in the mirror. “Beautiful.”

They lock eyes in the reflection and then John is spinning her around to face him. Her back presses against the counter but she doesn’t mind the cold marble so much when John pulls her in for a kiss.  He kisses her tattoo, then her collarbone then brings both her hands to his lips this time. “Beautiful,” he repeats.

Emori looks over her shoulder at the mirror. Her hair is a bird’s nest at the nape of her neck. She can see her second tattoo, the one by her ribs, through the fabric of her shirt.

“Look at you.” John’s voice was pure awe. Emori tries not to flush, turns back toward him to meet his eyes. The sincerity in them makes her uneasy. “How can you not see it?”

“I’m not-” Her voice cracks under the weight of her insecurities and his worship. She tries again. “To you I am. But you don’t know any better.”

It has the same bite and sting as his words when she told him she came back for him and he negated her with a harsh not for me, you didn’t. I just so happened to be there. It’s the same thing, she thinks, or at least a near enough thing to count against them both. They are both lonely, both afraid to be anything less or anything more.

John scoffs lightly. “I don’t want to know any better. I mean…” He trails off. She can feel the heat of his eyes as he looks her over. “Look at you,” he says again. “Your smile and your eyes and your laugh...” He steps closer, caging her in with his arms. “You’re all I want. You’re all I will ever want.”

She pulls him down for a kiss, losing herself to the press and slide of lips and tongue. Somehow he lifts her onto the counter, fitting himself between her legs, his hands gripping her thighs, leaving bruises.

His kisses are always deep, needy, asking for reassurance that she’s here, that she will not leave, and even now his hands on her are tight, searching, desperate to feel her, to have her close. She doesn't mind, especially not when he leaves a mark. It sends flashes of heat through her stomach when she sees them later.

“I love you,” she gasps out quietly when he kisses her neck, nuzzling and biting softly.

He pulls back, studies her. His hair is mussed from both sleep and her fingers. His lips, red and swollen, part in a soft breath.

“I love you too.” He kisses her nose. She smiles, heart overflowing with something slow and warm and soft.

He points to the mirror behind her. Emori turns, smile still on her lips.

“That,” John says definitively, “is the most beautiful thing of all.”

[beautiful-systems-dying]

all the nosy anons;)

…well fuck buckle up y’all

0:Height not 100% sure but I think 160 cm (5′3″)

1: Age: 16 in less than two weeks

2:Shoe size 38?

3:Do you smoke? kinda yeah but I’m trying not to

4:Do you drink? yeah

5: Do you take drugs? not yet (i mean i never have but my stoner friend is changing schools soon so I kinda asked her to let me smoke some eth her before she goes)

6:Age you get mistaken for preteen or young adult (as in not a teen). don’t ask me how.

7:Have tattoos? nah

8:Want any tattoos ? yes, though not sure about the design yet

9:Got any piercings? yeah I got both my ear lobes pierced tho I don’t have any earings i like so i don’t wear any

10:Want any piercings? yeah I kinda want a helix

11:Best friend? A friend I met at a con two years ago named Omer who I love and is a great friend

12:Relationship status  tragically single

13:Biggest turn ons umm Idk dude. Pulling off a smug smile? neck kisses? umm idkkkkk

14:Biggest turn offs a bad personality mostly, bad hygiene, idk?

15:Favorite movie ahhhhhhhidki don’t really watch movies? Lemonade mouth maybe?

16:I’ll love you if

You’re caring, genuine, reassuring,idk how to explain but like, good moral support kinds?

17:Someone you miss idkkk my best friend maybe?

18:Most traumatic experience lol you’re really asking someone with CPTSD that? TW in white (hopefully)

Let’s say something involving being hit then pinned against my bed and having my mouth covered once I attempt screaming for help.(i feel i should clarify it was not sexual assault)

End of TW

19: A fact about your personality It’s bad? idk.

20:What I hate most about myself lol just one thing? I’m too mean   and I hate my body and voice

21:What I love most about myself umm I’m very caring and I think I’m good at helping and supporting people? idk. I love my morals and ideals and i stand up for what’s right and like. idk,

22:What I want to be when I get older  no clue. I’m actually really struggling with that cause I decided/realised I most likely won’t kill myself and now I need to realise what I wanna do with all this time I now have

23:My relationship with my sibling(s) I’m a single child 

24:My relationship with my parent(s) with mum it used to be real bad for the past year or two but she recently had a change 0of heart and it’s pretty good now. my dad has been abusive throughout my life and I dislike him and mostly avoid him.

25:My idea of a perfect date idk.. talking, telling each other stories, being in a nice pleasant place like maybe by the sea or something. The interaction is what matters I’m not really the type who cares about what we’re doing. Not the movie theatre type tho watching something inhome could be fun, I jsut want to be able to talk and interact and all.

26: My biggest pet peeves the way certain things sound or feel (yey sensory issues), when people accidentally touch me or touch me without me knowing it’s gonna happen, (sensory issues again) and like idk certain view i guess idki have more i know it but icant think of any

27:A description of the girl/boy I like *I…don’t have romantic feelings towards anyone

28:A description of the person I dislike the most I’m not sure which it is so either a forty-year-old fat guy at 174 cm with constant stubble, long black curls and brown eyes or a short old woman with short grey hair or a chubby average height 15-year-old boy with short black hair, large cheeks and very noticeable lips

29:A reason I’ve lied to a friend so that they don’t worry about me

30:What I hate the most about work/school It’s very draining and I’m forced to hear ignorant hateful people the whole time and constantly being misgendered and too much noise

31:What my last text message says translated from hebrew: “the song that’s actually good (and that while less than other songs from the performance demonstrates why compared to the rest of the program I feel like a bad singer) youtube link the funniest song (that demonstrates how weird the program’s arrangements can get sometimes) _ youtube link_”

32:What words upset me the most Slurs i suppose, mostly the f word and a local trans slur

33:What words make me feel the best about myself idk umm. telling me I’ve helped a lot or made someone feel alot better or something like being happy to know me or. idk. something indicating I’m loved or that I’m helpful

34:What I find attractive in women ahhhhhhhha um a nice face? pretty hair? idk um ahh shoulders? a pretty smile? freckles maybe? idk I might be bi but I’m effectively gay

35:What I find attractive in men pretty eyes and a nice face, a defined jawline, cheekbones, a nice haircut that isn’t super short and hair that isn’t straight (either curly or wavy), a nice smile!! maybe with dimples, a cute laugh, freckles can be nice but aren’t necessary, that kind of skinny guy muscles?the “i don’t work out but my arms still look mice” kinda thing. generally, i love the kind of skinny-fit body type which is neither super tall and gangly but isn’t the typical abs and muscles type most people love  but i mean the somewhat more wide shoulders and muscles types can be really hot too and umm. nice eyebrows lol and like sounds weird but not straight? Idk when I feel like someone is queer they tend to be more attractive somehow. ohhh and a pretty voice which isn’t super high (not necessarily low not. superr high.) and either really confident or appear confident and smooth or cute and blushy.

That’s so gay look how much i went on about men and look at the women part

36:Where I would like to live idk!! in the city for sure, im a city boy. Maybe tel aviv which I live by or somewhere in south England or Canada. idk.

37:One of my insecurities my voice and general appearance, mainly jaw,neck,hips, smile, teeth, butt and chest

38:My childhood career choice a scientist/inventor who’s also an author

39:Myfavorite ice cream flavor a mixture of strawberry and chocolate

40:Who I wish I could be a cisgender neurotypical guy

but on a more achievable note, someone who’s relatively happy and is good and capable of helping people and making the world a better place.

41:Where I want to be right now

idk. kinda wanna be at the beach, just… walking in the water.

42:The last thing I ate chocolate

43:Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately …pass

44:A random fact about anything   IDK how it was translated but in the bible (meaning the old testament) they never call the language hebrew hebrew- they call it Jewish