#so i grew up watching a lot of movies with those two in
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sleeplessdreamer14 · 4 months ago
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𝓌𝒽𝑒𝓃 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝓀𝓃𝑜𝓌 (𝓅𝒶𝓇𝓉 𝐼𝐼)
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fandom: gravity falls
relationship: stanford pines x reader
summary: the moment Ford realized he loved you.
contains: fluff, pining, a few little references, no dialogue
some folks who loved part I: @thistrashisreadytobash @allies-diary @gravity-falls-fanatic89 @nelson-and-murdock
It had been a few months since Ford realized he liked you, and he was handling it… relatively well.
Upon fully registering the fact that he had a thing for you, Stanford decided to give it some time just to see if the crush would fade and things would go back to normal. But as weeks passed, it gradually became clear that these feelings weren’t going anywhere. Especially since a lot of cheesy love songs were starting to make a lot of sense to him all of a sudden.
That being said, he had found a way to make the best of the situation. Ford still spent time with you, fortunately still feeling comfortable in your company. 
Though he had to admit, even the littlest things you did, like looking in his direction with those soulful eyes and saying his name, had a habit of getting his train of thought lost for a good second, resulting in him having to catch himself before he could say something stupid. 
Now, strolling along the boardwalk, he found himself lost in thought. Whenever the two of you would part ways at the end of the day, even if you had just spent hours together, it always felt like he was leaving your side too soon. Like he always wanted just a few more minutes with you. 
If Ford were to be completely honest, it was a bit frustrating, liking you. He had only had a select few crushes in the past- all of which seemed to go awry in some way or another- and none of them measured up to what he felt for you. Whereas he would feel little bouts of giddy excitement at the thought of his previous objects of infatuation, his crush on you was a whole other ball park. The joy was still there, of course, but it was evenly accompanied by a tightness in his chest that would have him distracted during the day and restless at night.
And as if on cue, the sound of your voice pulled Ford out of his thoughts, prompting him to lift his gaze from the old wooden planks of the boardwalk so he could see you walking in his direction and the distant clouds suddenly make way for the afternoon sun. He walked with you across the dock, sharing how your days have been and other such whatever.
Despite its difficulties, Ford liked this part of spending time with you. Ultimately, conversation with you has always been as easy as breathing. You understood each other's idiosyncrasies, and even liked each other all the more for them, and you just passed the time together so well.
For most of his life, Stanford had been brought up to meet certain expectations set up by those around him, thanks to his higher-than-average academic smarts.
But standing at the edge of the pier, leaning against the railing, staring out at the plum tinted sea with you, all of those things were put on the back-burner, and he wasn’t the six-fingered freak or the de facto smartest kid in the room. He could just indulge in simple whimsy, like when you two would watch scary movies and judge the quality of the acting and the special effects, or get drinks together after school and hang out until it got dark.
It was rare for him to meet anyone who made him feel so comfortably… human. 
As the sun got lower, the skies grew darker, and the carnival lights came on, the full weight of the situation gradually dawned on Ford as he took a couple of small side steps to be closer to you, fumbling curtly with his hands. He loved to see you, to talk to you, hear you laugh, to be next to you. He just… loved you.
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joonipertree · 3 months ago
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Someone planted in my head that todoroki playing with eri would heal his inner child because he grew up not allowed to play with his siblings or have any friends so!
Imagine one day you lug in a huge lego set or a puzzle and you ask him to help you with it. Shoto, who generally is a quieter and calmer soul, finds peace and comfort in it. The both of you spend hours on it, even if he's tired after work. He starts buying more and more sets, and lets be honest....dabi or one of the older todoroki siblings probably guilted endeavour into spending money on these sets for his adult son.
Then, you bring in beyblades and the two of you start having mini battles that have narrations and everything. I'd like to think that Shoto already has some experience with this because of Class A and used to do this a lot with kaminari and the rest! Sometimes, when Class A would have a get together (no matter how infrequent they may be), they still take out the board games and get super fucking competitive.
I'd like to think that no matter what, Class A spent years in school with weekly game nights!!
Then! One day, you drag shoto with you to watch the Barbie movie which he LOVED, he wore pink and everything, and got really curious when you talked about playing with dolls as a kid. He played with dolls as a kid but generally on his own.
Next thing he knows, you bought some toys and the two of you were sat on the living room floor playing with dolls. Shoto, in all honestly, felt silly doing so but didn't wanna discourage you so he played along. At first, he played it with a very no nonsense tone, made the bear have a job and responsibilities.
"Ah, tax season is coming around...it'll be tough this year."
"Shoto....I don't think the bear needs to worry about taxes."
"She's a businesswoman, it's her civic duty to pay taxes."
"Well she didn't so now she's under arrest :)"
"Ah fuck."
Pretty soon this just fizzled out into a plushie collection that included his own eventual plushies, his friend's plushies, bunnies and bears and cats. He even had those giant ones that are almost life sized. Yes, some of them he bought them for you and you bought for him but they turned into a shared custody situation.
One day, Touya visits with the two of you sitting on the living room floor, shoto's hair braided and cute star stickers on his face. You were focusing heavily on painting his nails half white and half red. Shoto just made eye contact with his older brother and grinned, asking if he wanted his nails painted.
"Do ya'll have black?" Touya asked.
"We have sparkly navy blue?"
"Fucking fine."
And that's how he ended up on the floor too, with his legs crossed and a cat plushie between them, having his nails painted while his baby brother tied his hair into pigtails. The man complained really loudly about it but had no intention of moving.
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gallaghersgal · 4 months ago
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first misses || carmen berzatto
pairing: carmy x fem!reader
warnings & tags: no warnings! fluff, fluff, and more fluff. first kiss scenario. giving carmen the sweet innocent childhood moments he deserves. growing apart but finding each other again <33
a/n: thank u to worm for the idea, and to the tumblr baddie collective for cheering me on! my first FULL length carmy fic, and my first work over 1k in ... actual years i think.
wc: 1.3k
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Carmen never liked wearing glasses. they fogged up too often, or slipped down the bridge of his nose. and one time, when he was eleven years old, they just about ruined his life.
You were the prettiest girl in the fifth grade, a Chicago transplant, and the apple of every little boy's eye. But you only had eyes for one Carmen Berzatto. The day you made him hold your hand to cross the street on the field trip to the art museum, he knew he couldn't let summer roll around without telling you how he felt. But Mikey teased him, and Sugar tried her best but her advice sounded too motherly, so Carmen was left to plot for himself.
He still remembers that day, the last day of fifth grade. The pretty gingham dress with the little bow you wore—your Dorothy dress, as you called it—and your hair tied up to play field games with the other kids waiting at pickup. He had tugged you behind the bleachers with nervous, sweaty palms, thankful that you didn't notice or at the very least held back any comments.
"I wanna kiss you," he blurted out, cheeks turning pink at the admission. "C-Can i kiss you?"
You looked down at your feet for a minute, tennis shoe toe digging into the gravel, before you looked up at him. "Um, sure!" you grinned shyly, and Carmen felt like his world was skidding to a halt right then and there. "I've never kissed anyone before. like, on the lips?"
"I-I h-haven't either," he stammered, his face going pale with nerves. His hands began to shake when you stepped up closer.
"That's okay, I think it's easy."
You held out your hand until Carmen took it, then closed your eyes to lean in. He couldn't help but stare curiously, and the moment unfolded before his eyes. Before you could kiss him, your brow ran right into the wireframe of his glasses. You pulled back, a little startled, one eyebrow raised.
"Sorry, 'm s-sorry," he said nervously, watching as you scrunch your nose in concentration. Before he knew what was happening you'd leaned in again. Your lips barely brushed his, those stupid glasses still in the way, but it was a kiss. It counted.
You pulled back with a wide grin, "there! Now we had our first kiss!"
Carmen wanted to say something, he really did. Maybe ask to sign your yearbook, or if you’d want to come see a movie with him, but the teacher was calling your name. You had to leave. You had to leave, and Carmen didn't know if he'd see you at all, for the whole summer. His little heart ached at the thought of not seeing your smile. Not hearing your laugh. Missing the way you always smelled like strawberries and vanilla from your little hand sanitizer, the one he always asked to borrow after recess.
But at that moment you were standing in front of him, with that same pretty grin, and throwing your arms around him for a quick hug. You turned to leave, then turned back, just to surprise him with a sweet kiss to his cheek. "Bye Carmy! Have a good summer!" you said, before running off.
And Carmen just stood there, awestruck.
Sure, he saw you again the next year, but a lot happened that summer. The transition to middle school was a big one, you weren't in any classes together, and year by year the two of you grew apart until Carmen was halfway across the country and you were nothing but a memory.
He didn't see you again until, god, at least thirteen years later. He wasn't sure how long it had been. He wasn't even sure how he'd managed to bump into you. But a few hours and a coffee later you'd given him your number. And that night you'd texted him; would you wanna go out, like on a date? i couldn't bring myself to ask you face to face. but i think it would be nice. just lmk :)
And it was nice. you wore a dress that looked amazing against your skin, and he got to finally tell you how pretty you were, after all the years of silence. After the days spent sketching you in the margins of his notebooks, peering at you from across the cafeteria, and showing up to football games just to get a glimpse of you with your friends. You looked beautiful as ever, and he made sure to tell you. 
“Y’know, I always thought you were so pretty” he mumbled, sounding reverent as he stood outside your apartment door. Your back was against your door, hands not even bothering with pushing it open. 
“That’s really sweet, Carmy,” you whispered. One hand raised up to touch his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin under your fingertips. His cheeks were tinted a soft pink, that same lovely color you’d see when you were young. The one you’d crack jokes, give lingering glances, and throw compliments his way just to see. 
Carmen’s eyes fluttered closed, like he was committing your image to memory. Maybe he was. 
“Do you remember the last day of fifth grade?” you asked cautiously, waiting for him to open his eyes before continuing. “When we kissed under the bleachers?” His embarrassment was written across his face, cheeks flushed and eyes cast down to the floor. You took one curl by the side of his face around your finger, twirled it into a perfect little spiral just to let it go again. Patiently, you waited for him to speak.
“Y-Yeah, yeah. I remember,” he replied with a quiet laugh. “I went home and begged my mom not to make me wear glasses anymore. As if she could’ve done anything about my shitty eyesight,” he added with a scoff.
“Hm. Well, I mean, I guess it worked. You got contacts, yeah? Or are you just blind as a bat?” you asked, and brought your eyes up to meet his own. “Do you wanna try again?” You tacked the last sentence on, almost like an afterthought, afraid if you took too much time to think on it you’d chicken out entirely. 
Carmen grinned, and you swore it was one of the most beautiful things you’d ever seen. Not the tight lipped smile he often wore in photos, no, this was all teeth and sparkling eyes and joy. Like the kid under the bleachers all those years ago. 
“Bats, uhm, they- they aren’t,” he stammered, his hands shaking as they held on to your hips. “Common mistake, see, they’ve actually got-”
“Carmen,” you interrupted softly. He only hummed in response, a soft affirmative noise that let you know he wanted this too. As if the way he looked at you could’ve been interpreted any other way. “Just kiss me.”
You didn’t have to tell him twice. His lips were soft–if not a little chapped, but you didn’t mind–when they finally brushed yours, this time with no pesky glasses in the way. One of his hands moved up to the back of your neck, cradling you there.
To call the moment bliss would’ve been an understatement. 
When Carmen finally pulled away from you his eyes remained closed, soaking up the moment, afraid he’d look again to find it was all a dream. A dream he’d had over and over, each night as he drifted off. The sweet girl he’d once known, finally in his arms again.
When his blue eyes finally made their reappearance you were staring at him, analyzing his expression as one finger twirled around that same little curl. “You should come inside,” you told him, and he winced slightly. 
“I-I, don’t wanna fuck it up. Don't wanna rush... this,” he admitted breathlessly, to which you shook your head.
“Nothing like that. Just, don’t wanna stop talking to you,” you explained, showing your intentions were to take this slow. To learn him again, or, was it for the first time? It didn’t matter. All that mattered was his smile, as he nodded and followed you inside.
end.
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main masterlist || carmy masterlist
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pnutbutter-n-j-elyy · 17 days ago
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hii love! i just read your clingy so u distance yourself fic for the bazillion time and i cried again no surprise🥹 I just wanted to say i love your works so much and would live to request for an angst oneshot with brother bsf chan? basically reader has been pining for chan for a few years but she never got the courage to tell chan cause she thinks she isn’t good enough for chan. Then afterwards basically chan got a girlfriend who hated her and basically influenced chan to stop hanging out with her which he listened to and told the reader which the reader told him that his girlfriend wasn’t loyal but he thought she was sabotaging his relationship and so they ended off on bad terms but turns out a few weeks later he caught his girlfriend cheating and went back to the reader? sorry if it is kinda long but i rlly need a oneshot like this to read when i just need some angst i really live and admire your works so id be elated if you did my request. thank you and lots of love❤️
my first piece since I went on a mini little baby hiatus. and i had a lot of joy writing this. so i hope you enjoy <3!!!
Brothers Bsf Chan x Fem!Reader (angst/fluff)
6.8k words
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You didn’t know when it started. Was it a simple touch? A brush of a hand or an accidental graze of fingers? Or was it one of those lazy Friday nights where Chan would crack jokes to you and his best friend- your older brother Jisung- while you three were watching movies in the house you grew up in. Or did it stem back all the way to those days where you would chase after Chan and Jisung on the playground, down your neighborhood streets- crying out for them to wait for you. Those cries stopped when Chan would reach his hand out to bring you along.
Maybe it was a combination of all of those things, those things you had tried so hard to forget because it could only lead to heartbreak. Falling in love with your brother’s best friend was no easy feat for anyone. Let alone when you were falling for someone like Chan, who was so hard to fall out of love with. Maybe even more so for you since he would always be in your life. Him and Jisung were nearly joined at the hip, which made it even harder to hide your pining for him. You wouldn’t dare love out loud, but it was starting to whisper through the cracks of your resolve.
You were unconditionally in love with everything about Chan. 
That's how it was for years, and how you intended it to be for as long as allowed. You spent countless nights staring at your ceiling, wondering if he could ever see you the way that you saw him. You were sure things were only platonic between the two of you, but you couldn’t help but linger on the memories of certain looks, certain gestures that you couldn’t delude yourself into believing happened between friends. 
Things started to change when Chan began dating someone new. 
Duri. Her name was Duri, and the first time you met her, you knew she was the type to turn heads. She had a smile that could light up a room and a confidence you could only dream of. Standing next to her, you felt small, like a background character in Chan’s life story. A girl who captured Chan’s attention so easily. A girl who wrapped him up in her life so easily that you knew you were to be forgotten. He was smitten and her words flowed like the river of the smoothest molasses. She could easily convince Chan, he didn’t need you. Because she didn’t like you.
You weren’t sure why, but it was obvious. And because she didn’t like you, her feelings towards Jisung weren’t all that different, it seemed. And slowly you felt like Chan was making his way out of your life.
“Ji, why isn’t Chris here?” You loved the way his name sounded when you said it. Not many people around you called him Chris, so it felt special to call him that. He seemed to enjoy it as well, not ever asking you to conform to societal norms.
“He’s probably just busy, Y/N-ie…I’m sure he’ll come back around.” Jisung said one day as you guys sat on the couch, scrolling through movies. It was the first Friday movie Chan had missed. And even if it was the first time he had missed it, you knew it would be a regular occurrence.
In all honesty, at first, you tried to like Duri. She was with Chan, after all, and you thought that maybe you could be friends. That maybe if you could convince yourself to like her then the pain of not being the one that Chan loved would ease.. But the more you saw her, the more you felt her sharp, indirect glances, the way she dismissed you with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. She made you feel invisible, as if you were only tolerated because you were Jisung’s sister. Even if she just barely tolerated the latter.
Over time, you saw the changes in Chan too. He became distant, no longer the easygoing guy who’d spend hours with you and your brother. He was still polite, still kind, but he was pulling away, bit by bit. You told yourself it was just a phase, that he’d come around once things settled down with Duri.
But then, one night, things came to a head.
You, Jisung, and Chan had made plans to meet at your favorite café—just a casual hangout, like old times. But when Chan showed up with his girlfriend by his side, something was off. His smile was forced, his laughs hollow. He barely met your eyes, and when you spoke, and even then  it was like he wasn’t really listening. To the point that Jisung even pointed it out. Every time you spoke, Duri happened to speak at the same time. Every time a question was directed at you, Duri somehow changed the conversation. You felt small and insignificant and made your way home early. You couldn’t stand to sit there and see the man you were so down bad for with his significant other. Duri had sat close to him, her hand always somewhere on his arm or shoulder, marking her territory in the subtlest way, in a way that caused an anger that wasn’t so subtle. 
But even then after leaving you couldn’t shake the ache in your chest. You sat down on a bench outside of a convenience store by your home, trying to sort out your feelings. 
You okay? I’ll be heading home soon. We went out to drink. 
You quickly type out a reply to Jisung, your fingers shaking as you realized just how cold it was. Just as you were about to get up to leave a pale hand reached out to you with a warm drink. 
You looked up to see a guy with dark and prominent eyebrows, and a little birthmark on his nose. 
“You seemed cold. Its…” He looked at the can. “Mocha flavored.” He handed it back out to you and smiled softly. 
“Thank you.” You said with a small bow of your head, and you couldn’t help but smile at the thoughtful gesture. 
“You live in the neighborhood right? Your brother…looks like a squirrel?” The man’s voice was soft and shy, like he thought he was talking too much.
“Oh! You’re our new neighbor? I’m Han Y/N.” You said with a flourished bow.
“Park Sunghoon. Nice to meet you…” He shuffled awkwardly. “Would you like me to wait before I walk home…I don't want to make you uncomfortable.”
“No! No! It’s fine, I'm not uncomfortable. You can walk home with me.” You say quietly. “Maybe it’ll be nice to not feel lonely.”
As you made your way back home with Sunghoon you had a weird feeling in your chest. You thought maybe you were just trying to sort your feelings, but it was more of an intuitive sense. 
Then you got a text from your brother.
I’m coming home. Duri tried to make a move on me and I’m not trying to get into it with Chan while she is here.
You blinked at the text, nodding when your voice registered Sunghoon asking if you were okay.
That was that odd feeling…
You didn’t know if it was selfish to feel happy that Duri was a tool, but you did. You didn’t want Chan to get hurt so you decided to go talk to him. Giving a message on behalf of Jisung, who thought maybe Chan would listen better if it was coming from a girl
“Hey, can I talk to you?” you asked, your voice soft but determined, as you walked up to him outside of his job a few days later.
“Yeah, of course,” he replied, looking a bit surprised. He followed you to a quieter part of the park, away from prying eyes. “Is everything okay? Jisung hasn’t texted me in a couple of days…"
You took a breath, feeling the words tangle on the tip of your tongue. “Chris…I just…I feel like you’re not around as much anymore. I get that you’re with Duri, but…it’s like you’re pulling away from me and Jisung. My brother is too scared to say anything, but he feels just as bad, if not worse than I do.”
He frowned, looking down at the ground. “I’m sorry if it feels that way,” he said finally, but not much emotion in his voice. “But…I need to be there for Duri. She’s… she doesn’t feel comfortable with me hanging out so much with, you know…” He trailed off, not meeting your eyes.
Your heart sank, a cold dread washing over you. “With me, you mean?”
He hesitated, but the silence was all the confirmation you needed. “She…doesn’t get why I’m so close with you. And I don’t want her to feel insecure, so I…I think it’s best if we… keep some distance. Just for now.”
You stared at him, feeling a surge of hurt and anger. “Chris, she’s manipulating you!” you said, the words slipping out before you could stop them. “She’s making you feel guilty for caring about people who were here long before she was. Because she knows those people will pinpoint, that she’s a manipulative cheater!”
He looked at you, a flash of anger in his eyes at the words. “You don’t know her like I do,” he snapped.
You flinched at the venom in his voice. He had never snapped at you and you could feel tears spring to your eyes.
“She tried to make a move on Ji…” You said quietly. “And don’t try and say my brother is a liar, Chris,  because you know he’s not.”
Chan gave a sarcastic chuckle. “She already told me that Y/N. She was drunk. It was nothing more than that.”
“Drunk actions are sober thought Chris!” You shot back.
“Oh, so the first time you ever got drunk and confessed your feelings for me was a sober thought?”
You felt your body freeze and you blinked at Chan with wide eyes. You blacked out the first time you had ever drank and didn’t touch anything since. You never knew you had admitted to liking Chan.
“So it’s true then? You actually love me?” Chan let out a large sigh. “Frankly, it’s not fair for you to accuse her of things that aren’t true just because you put me on a pedestal. Your feelings for me aren’t my responsibility Y/N. This…this just feels like you’re trying to come between us because of some childish jealousy. She’s my girlfriend, and I trust her more than I trust someone who hasn’t been honest to me for years.”
You felt like you’d been slapped. The words cut deeper than anything you’d expected, leaving you struggling for air. “That’s not…that’s not what I’m doing, Chan. I just…I don’t want to see you get hurt.” You tried to say back. “My feelings have nothing to do with this I’m coming to you as a friend-”
“Friends don’t feel that way about each other Y/N! Once you cross that line friendship can’t be used as a label. Do you ever think that Duri might be acting this way because you absolutely suck at hiding your feelings?!” His voice was sharper than ever and you could feel a sad squeeze in your heart. “So deal with the fact that I’m going to put my girlfriend first- regardless of what I feel for you.” There was the slightest hesitation and falter in his face at his last words, but you were too upset to decipher what exactly that meant. “ I’m done with this conversation. I’ll see you later, Y/N.” He said in a soft yet defeated voice, leaving you standing there, heartbroken and speechless.
The next few weeks were met with silence.  Jisung asked what had happened, but you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him. You kept your pain buried, letting it fester in the corners of your mind. Chan had felt terrible for yelling at you, and had come over to apologize with extra snacks for your guys Friday night movie, but to his surprise, it was only Jisung who was there. 
“Where is Y/N?” Chan asked, setting down your favorite candy and chips on the reclining chair you always claimed. He looked around the corner to see if you were in your room. Your door was open and he walked in, looking at the little polaroids littered across your room on various walls and flat surfaces. He looked at your books and plushies with a soft smile. 
“She’s working overtime tonight. Do you want to watch a Marvel or DC movie?” Jisung called from the living room. Chan’s brow furrowed. He knew the company you worked for closed early on Fridays, all employees getting off early. Something he had realized after observing you for so long. 
“Marvel…” Chan called out, closing the door behind himself.
As suspected you weren’t working overtime. 
Rather as time passed, you found comfort in unexpected places. One of those places was the attractive man that one night, your neighbor Sunghoon. Who, much to your surprise, shared your interests and understood your silence without question. He became your confidant, your quiet escape from the heartache Chan had left behind.
“He’s probably over at my house right now with Jisung.” You had mumbled as you cuddled up on his side. Also, much to your surprise, Sunghoon was a great cuddle buddy. What was even better is that he wanted nothing in return, nor were there any ill intentions letting you grow close to him in an emotional and physical way. He had confided in you that a deeper intimacy was something he couldn’t ever see himself liking, which was why he was set on settling down alone, and that he wasn’t much of a physical person to begin with, but with you he found himself not minding the soft physicality much at all. 
“Like we’re twin flames right.” You had joked, that day, holding out your pinky. He had nodded, locking pinkies with yours. 
“You’re right, but I am more than sure he won’t think to come over her-”
The doorbell rang and you sprung up from your position on the couch as Sunghoon made his way to the door. 
“Well speak of the devil…” He mumbled. 
Chan stood at the doorway of Jisung’s new neighbor, delivery food in his hand. He looked at the bag and considered the weight of the bag.
Maybe a couple having date night?
“Hello?” A tall and undeniably attractive man stood at the door. 
Damn…wow uh-
“Oh, hey! I think your delivery was sent to my friend’s house. I just wanted to make sure you knew it was here...” The man looked at Chan with a blank look. 
Are kids these days given supplements or something…why is he so majestic looking…
“Oh, thank you.” He said , bowing and grabbing the food.
Before the door was shut, Chan could’ve sworn he noticed a pair of familiar shoes, but disregarded it, making his way back to Jisung’s.
As more time passed, you found yourself missing Chan rather than getting over him. 
“Is it strange, Sungie?” you asked while you were building a puzzle with him one evening- another Friday. “That I’m absolutely pissed, and heartbroken, but I want nothing more than to see him? And I can’t think of anything other than I miss him?”
Sunghoon thought for a moment and then spoke softly. “No, it’s not strange at all. Rather, it’d be strange if you didn’t. Sometimes, love clings to us hardest when we’re hurting the most. It's like every part of you is aching for the one person who can make it better—even if they’re the one who hurt you. Missing him doesn’t make you weak; it just means he’s still a part of your heart. Sometimes, loving someone means feeling everything all at once—the anger, the heartbreak, and that unstoppable longing. It’s okay to feel it all."
You were at your house, and Sunghoon was over since he had become a regular visitor, after Jisung befriended him and then finally pieced together where you were going every Friday and other odd days of the week when you first heard the news. At first he had assumed you and Sunghoon were a thing until you both quickly shot down that notion by informing Jisung that relationships and love were not Sunghoon’s cup of tea.
But since he now knew that wasn’t the case, and had long since known the truth since your first and last drunk outing he thought you might want to know.
“They broke up. Strange enough, Chan didn’t seem all that upset—I mean, he did seem upset, but you think you’d be more upset when you break up, you know?” Jisung rambled, barely pausing for breath. “Instead, he was, like, really calm, which made no sense to me. I feel like I’d be freaking out, or, like, super sad, or anxious, or angry. How can you just be indifferent to a breakup with someone you thought was going to be the love of your life? It’s like those characters in anime—”
You tuned out Jisung’s voice, the news sinking in like stones in your stomach as you laid your head against Sunghoon’s side as he read the ingredients on an air freshener bottle while he waited for Jisung to finish warming up food. 
Chan and Duri had broken up. Your heart was a tangled mess of relief and pain, of memories you hadn’t let yourself fully process. After all those months, he was free—but what did it mean now? What did any of it mean when he’d already chosen her once?
As Jisung continued his rapid-fire monologue, you watched to the two people who had been a distraction these past few weeks: him and Sunghoon. Sunghoon, in a more practical way since he knew the depths of your doubts and worries, and easily fit into the spot of your platonic soulmate and best friend. It seemed he was more versed on the Chan-sized hole in your heart than even you were, and you were glad you now had him to walk these roads with you.
Eventually Jisung came back to the living room with dinner, and you were soon enough immersed into the activities of the evening. 
You were unaware what was about to go down when the knock at the door came, Jisung springing up to answer it, his laughter echoing down the hall as he let someone in. The air around you shifted, growing thicker, familiar, and before you even turned around, you knew who was standing there. 
You had known him long enough to sense when the man you loved was in the room. His presence filled it quickly enough, his gaze sweeping over the space, lingering a little too long on you and Sunghoon, who seemed to be molded together perfectly, Sunghoon’s arm lazily resting on your leg.
Jisung shot you an awkward glance before mumbling something about getting snacks from the store. He and Sunghoon exchanged a glance, and, with a silent nod Sunghoon got up, and they left, closing the door behind them. You were left alone with Chan in the thick silence that followed, the quiet pressing down around you.
Chan’s expression was tense, guarded, and yet, behind his eyes, you saw a trace of vulnerability. He took a hesitant step toward you, his voice soft. “Y/N…”
You met his gaze, pain simmering just beneath the surface. “What are you doing here?”
He took a deep breath, guilt etched into the lines of his face. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, his voice cracking slightly. “I should have listened to you. I didn’t… I couldn’t see it. I was so focused on Duri that I didn’t see what was right in front of me. She wasn’t loyal. I caught her cheating, and I realized just how wrong I was and how right you and Jisung were.”
His words landed between you, each one a mix of relief and ache that clawed at your heart. But you couldn’t ignore the questions tumbling through your mind—the doubts that held you back from even entertaining the hope you’d once felt. You folded your arms, steadying yourself as you looked away.
“Chan, I don’t even know what to say to you. It’s not just about her or your breakup,” you said, voice low.
The older boy flinched at your words. 
“Chan…” He mumbled. You had rarely ever spoken his name aloud like that before. So rarely he couldn’t even remember the last time you did, and he didn’t even recognize your voice when you said it. “I messed up horribly…didn’t I?”
 “You didn’t just choose her.” You started. “You looked me in the eyes and didn’t believe me. You accused me of saying things because of personal feelings. Then went on to accuse me of lying to you because I never confessed my feelings- even though apparently I did and you just omitted the truth of what I said when I blacked out as if that's not also a form of dishonesty. You thought I was trying to ruin your happiness, like I’d sabotage your relationship out of jealousy. Are you serious, Chan?”
He winced again, his hand reaching toward you as if he wanted to touch you but was too afraid. “I know, Y/N, and I hate that I did that to you. I was wrong. I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but I just… I needed you to know that I truly am am sorry. I didn’t think I had hurt you that badly and it was foolish.”
The hurt that had sat quietly in your heart surged to the surface, and before you could stop yourself, you murmured, “So what? You’re here now because you need a rebound? You want someone to feel close to because she’s gone?”
Chan’s face fell, confusion and hurt flickering across his features. “What? No, Y/N, it’s not like that at all. You’re not some replacement or… or backup. You’ve never been that to me, ever.”
“Then what am I, Chan?” You shook your head, frustration and sorrow mingling together. “Because if I was the first one you come to- not even your best friend-” You said referring to your brother. “Than there has to be reason behind that. Let me guess, you feel something for me?” 
Chan swallowed and you knew his answer when you saw the look in his brown eyes. You let out and exasperated sigh and tried to hold back your tears, but couldn’t so you looked at the ground instead.
“If you really felt this way—if you really cared about me or dare I even say loved me…then why did you pick her? Why now, after you’ve been with her all this time? Am I supposed to believe that just because she’s out of the picture, you’ve suddenly realized what you want?” Your voice was sad and defeated and you let your tears fall. “If so that's really really mean.” You whined sadly.
His eyes widened, and he shook his head emphatically. “No, it’s not because of that. Y/N, I was so stupid. I’ve spent these past few weeks… I didn’t even realize how much I missed you until I lost you. I can’t just go back to how things were, but I know I want you in my life. I don’t want to lose you.”
He paused until you looked up at him, his heart shattering even more at the glossiness behind your sad eyes. “It’s not that Y/N-ie not at all. Sometimes you really just don’t know what you’ve had until you lost it.
But something about his gaze shifted as he glanced back toward the door where Jisung and Sunghoon had left. His mouth pressed into a thin line, his brows drawn together in a dark, unreadable expression. “Guess I’ve already been replaced though, huh?” He said quietly.
You felt your stomach twist at his words, your tears drying almost immediately with the thought of where this was heading. “Replaced? What are you even talking about?”
“Your neighbor,” he said bitterly, albeit soft; the label sharp on his tongue. “You and him. I came here to tell you how much I’ve messed things up, only to see you with him. I guess it didn’t take long for you to move on.”
The accusation in his voice stung, leaving you feeling exposed. You bit back the urge to yell, to let out the anger that had simmered for so long. You knew it brought some validity to his earlier statement, him being jealous of Sunghoon, but God did you sometimes want to smack sense into him.
 “You don’t get to come in here and make assumptions about me, Chan. Sunghoon is my friend. He’s been here because you weren’t. Because you pushed me away. I didn’t have a choice.”
“But you looked happy cuddled with him,” he said, a hint of defensiveness in his tone. “It didn’t seem like you missed me at all.”
You swallowed hard, feeling the tightness in your chest intensify. “Of course, I missed you. But you don’t get to accuse me of moving on. I waited. I wanted… I thought maybe one day you’d see me. But you chose her. You chose someone who didn’t even care about you, and I was the one left behind. So of course I needed comfort.”
He took a shaky breath, eyes softening as he stepped closer. “I chose wrong. I see that now, Y/N. I know I hurt you, and I don’t expect you to just forget that. But I can’t pretend now that I don’t feel something for you.”
You stared at him, searching his face for any hint of sincerity, but doubt gnawed at you. “We just went over this. How am I supposed to know it’s real? How am I supposed to believe that you actually want me, and not just because it’s convenient? If you loved me before than why not say something.”
“Why didn’t you say something!”
“Because unlike you I don’t go around dating people while I have a crush on someone Chan! If it was ‘oh so obvious’ than you should have said something. Or I don’t know, maybe when I blacked out and confessed you could have done something then-”
“I was petrified!” Chan shouted, causing you to take a step back. “How…how am I supposed to respond when my best friend’s little sister tells me she’s been in love with me since we were kids. And that’s its only growing?” He swallowed. “Am I supposed to take that risk and tell her its mutual, but that I don’t want to do anything in case things get messy? Because I don’t want to ruin things? Relationships are complicated Y/N! People fight and argue but romantic ones are so much heartier. Those arguments and fights hold more weight than friendships. I wasn’t…happy…only being your friend but I was content. Even if it meant I wouldn’t get to hold you or kiss you, or see your face in my children’s faces I was okay with that as long as it meant there was no risk in ruining things between us. And that saved me from the risk of getting on uneasy territory with Jisung. So I left it alone. I didn’t tell you. I asked Jisung to forget about it even if that meant he was upset at me for quote ‘rejecting my wonderful and perfect  little sister’ unquote.”
You stood there, lips trembling, not knowing what to say as he lay his heart in front of you.
He reached out, brushing a thumb over your cheek in a tender, hesitant motion. “But now that I know what it’s like to live without you, Y/N,  I can’t go back to that. I can’t. I don’t want anyone else. I just want a chance to make this right.”
The vulnerability in his eyes was almost too much, the raw honesty in his touch searing against your skin. But your heart still trembled with uncertainty, with a fear that ran deep.
“I’m petrified now.”
A tear slipped down his cheek as he nodded, a small chuckle leaving his lips, his thumb gently wiping away a tear that had fallen from your own eyes. “I’ll spend every day proving to you how much I love you, Y/N, so you won’t have a reason to be scared. I don’t want to lose you, not again. I was blind, but I see it now. And if you’ll let me, I’ll do whatever it takes to earn your trust back. To get you to a point where you won’t be able to deny the fact I only want you.”
You held his gaze, your heart wavering between the hope you’d never fully let go of and the fear that he’d break it all over again. And in that quiet moment, with the ache of the past between you, a fragile, cautious feeling began to bloom once more.
You took a steadying breath, bracing yourself as you met Chan’s eyes. “Chan, I don’t know what assumptions you’ve made about Sunghoon, but he’s just my friend. He’s been there because…” You hesitated, the words delicate on your tongue. “Because I needed someone. Not someone to date, or to replace you, but just…someone who understands. He’s helped me pick up the pieces after everything fell apart. And he’s not even interested in relationships like that. We’re just close in a different way.”
Chan blinked, his gaze softening as he listened, brows knitting in a mixture of relief and confusion. “So… you and Sunghoon… you’re really just friends?”
“Yes,” you replied, hoping he could hear the sincerity in your voice. “And he’s not going to change his mind about that. He doesn’t want anything more with anyone. It’s not in him. But he’s been a good friend—my best friend…my soulmate really.” Your voice trailed off quietly. “He’s someone I could talk to when I felt like I’d lost you.”
Chan let out a slow breath, some of the tension leaving his shoulders as he looked away, processing. “I…I feel so stupid. I was so ready to believe you’d moved on, that you’d replaced me. It was like this nightmare I’d imagined every night, that you’d found someone else who actually deserved you. And when I walked in and saw you both…”
His words faltered, and he rubbed a hand over his face, frustration and regret etched deep. “But I know I can’t blame you for being close to him. You had every right to find support after what I put you through. I just…”
“You just didn’t believe me,” you finished for him, the words raw but necessary. “And then you left, and I didn’t know how to fill that space you’d left behind but Sunghoon found a way. But that doesn’t mean he warrants any jealousy from you, Chris. I’m hoping you can learn to love him like you love Jisung. For me?”
He nodded, his eyes filled with regret.A part of you softened at the earnestness in his expression, the vulnerability that showed he understood, at least on some level, of what all of this meant. You sighed, feeling the weight of everything settling over you, but also immensely light.
But Chan seemed like he was struggling for a moment.
“Whats wrong?”
He bit his lip, his gaze darting away for a second before he finally asked, “Was there ever a point when…when you thought you could move on? That maybe you’d fall for someone else?”
The question struck deeper than you’d expected, and for a moment, you just looked at him, letting yourself process the vulnerability etched into his features. Did he truly think he could simply be replaced? That you’d spent years loving him, only to let him go?
“I thought about it,” you admitted, your voice soft but steady. “I thought maybe it would be easier if I could just let go. Even before all of this I thought about it. But no matter how much I tried, it was always you. It’s always been you.”
You felt the familiar sting of tears, and you blinked them away, not wanting him to see just how deeply his words affected you. “For the record, I don’t want to lose you either. But if we’re going to do this, we have to be honest. No more letting other people’s opinions get in the way. No more letting doubts fester between us.”
He nodded, a fierce determination filling his gaze. “No more doubts. I want us to be real, Y/N. Nothing standing in the way, just you and me.”
The weight of his words, the sincerity in his gaze, was almost overwhelming. You felt the warmth of his hand as he reached for yours, his fingers tentative, as if he wasn’t sure you’d accept him.
You took his hand, squeezing it gently, grounding yourself in the quiet assurance of his touch. It wasn’t the grand gesture you’d once dreamed of, but it was real. And somehow, that made it mean even more.
He looked down at your intertwined fingers, his thumb brushing softly over your knuckles. “Thank you for giving me this chance, Y/N. I’ll spend every day showing you that I mean it.”
You offered him a small, tentative smile, one that held a flicker of hope. “And I’ll do my best to believe it. But you have to understand—this is going to take time.”
He nodded, his own smile softening his face. “I’ll wait as long as it takes.”
For a moment, you both stood there, hands entwined, caught in the delicate balance between past hurt and the fragile possibility of something new. The wounds might still be raw, but you could feel them beginning to heal, slowly, with each beat of your hearts in sync.
As you looked into his eyes, you felt something you hadn’t felt in a long time—a cautious, budding belief that maybe, just maybe, this time, things would be different.
A few weeks later, things had settled into a comfortable, tentative new rhythm. The past wasn’t forgotten, but it had softened around the edges, allowing something new to bloom between you and Chan—no, Chris. You’d started calling him that again recently, just between the two of you, and every time he heard it, his eyes lit up, as though it was his own quiet assurance that he had your forgiveness, that he wasn’t just “Chan,” your brother’s best friend, but Chris, the man you were falling for all over again.
You weren’t rushing anything, taking each moment as it came. There were stolen glances, shared laughter, and late-night conversations that stretched until dawn, weaving a new kind of trust between you. He was patient and gentle, letting you set the pace, and every step you took forward felt right. It was healing, a slow rekindling that felt like rediscovering a part of yourself that had been missing.
One Saturday afternoon, you and Chris were sitting on the couch, a movie playing in the background as he leaned closer, his arm resting around your shoulders. Sunghoon and Jisung had left to get snacks- Chris listening to your request and giving Sunghoon a chance, finding out that he genuinely enjoyed the company of your best friend. 
“Its like eternal best friend double dates.” Jisung had joked.
But since your brother and best friend had left, Chan had been looking at you with that soft, adoring expression you’d only dreamed of before, and it made you feel like you were the only person in his world.
“You’re staring,” you whispered, smiling as you felt a blush creep up your cheeks.
“Can you blame me?” he murmured back, his voice warm and low. “I’ve missed so much time, I don’t want to miss a single moment now.”
You felt your heart stutter, a nervous excitement bubbling up as you glanced down at his hand, your fingers lightly tracing patterns on the back of it. The space between you felt electric, and when he gently cupped your face, tilting it towards him, your breath caught. Slowly, as if asking permission, he leaned in.
Your eyes fluttered shut, and then his lips brushed softly against yours, a delicate kiss that felt like everything you’d waited for. His hand cradled your cheek, his thumb brushing gently as if he were afraid you might disappear. You kissed him back, your hand moving to rest against his chest, feeling his heartbeat under your fingertips, strong and steady.
“Chris,” you whispered softly as you pulled back just enough to meet his gaze, his name slipping out naturally, comfortably. The warmth in his eyes told you he’d heard everything you couldn’t put into words—how he was forgiven, how he was here, truly here, and that was all you’d ever wanted.
The tender moment, though, was cut short by a loud gasp and a stumbling sound near the doorway. You whipped around to see Jisung and Sunghoon standing there, both looking wide-eyed and more than a little surprised.
“Oh… I did not mean to see that,” Jisung said, covering his eyes dramatically, though you could see the smirk threatening to break through. “My best friend and my little sister? Wow, I was not prepared!”
Sunghoon, by contrast, grinned openly, the kind of grin that said he’d known this would happen all along. “Took you both long enough,” he teased, making his way over towards you to whack your head affectionately. “I was starting to think I’d have to do something drastic to get you two together.”
You laughed, face warm with embarrassment, but Chris only chuckled, unfazed even by Sunghoon’s physical touch with you, as he slid his arm around your shoulders again. “You two need to learn how to knock,” he said lightly, squeezing you a little closer.
Sunghoon just shrugged, shooting you a mischievous look. “I’m sure Jisung didn’t feel a need to consider having to knock on the door of his own home.”
Jisung laughed, giving Sunghoon a playful nudge. But then turning to Chan with a serious look. “I might still need to have ‘the talk’ with you, Hyung. I know we’ve known each other forever, but this is new territory.”
You rolled your eyes, pretending to scowl at your brother. “Oh, please, Ji. You never said anything before.”
“It’s because you weren’t actually together at the time! But now you are.”
Chris leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head, a look of peace and contentment in his eyes. “Yeah, and I’m not going anywhere this time,” he said, looking up at Jisung and Sunghoon, his tone serious yet gentle. “Not ever.”
Jisung nodded, his expression softening as he took in the scene. “Good. Just make sure you’re good to her, alright? Or else I’ll have to do the brotherly duty of fighting you or whatever older brothers are supposed to do…” He mumbled, turning towards Sunghoon for backup.
“Yeah…and I’ll do whatever a best friend does…” He said confused, shrugging as you laughed.
Chris’s grip tightened just slightly around your shoulders. “You don’t have to worry about that,” he said, his voice low and steady. “She’s the most important person in my life.”
Jisung scrunched up his nose, pretending to gag. “Ugh, okay, I was prepared for the brother talk, but I did not sign up for the mushy romance stuff. Can you two not be gross for five seconds?”
Chris laughed, glancing down at you with a sparkle in his eyes. “Fine, I’ll spare you… for now,” he said, giving you a playful nudge and a kiss to your nose
Sunghoon, ever the instigator, leaned back with a grin. “Hey, give them a break, Jisung. They’ve got years of this to catch up on. And honestly, I’m enjoying the show.”
Jisung threw a pillow in Sunghoon’s direction. “Well then maybe you should go find yourself someone if you think it’s cute seeing how my best friend and sister act.” He teased, rolling his eyes but unable to hide the small smile tugging at his lips. “Maybe they’ll have a sister and then you can join our family.”
Sunghoon shuddered and shook his head. “No thank you. But Y/N’s kids will have an Uncle who spoils them.” He said, grabbing the bottle of Soju from the coffee table.
“Hey! I get the title of favorite Uncle automatically.” Jisung whined. “No fair.”
Sunghoon shrugged. “The favorite Uncle has to be from the maternal side.”
“The hypothetical-” He shot a look at you. “Mom in question is my sister!”
“Logic, doesn’t always logic my dear friend.”
As Sunghoon and Jisung went back and forth you laughed, settling into Chris’s embrace, feeling the warmth of home around you. You felt his smile without even looking and it made your heart leap. This, right here, was everything you’d hoped for and more. And as the teasing and laughter filled the room, you knew that no matter what, you were exactly where you were meant to be. With who you were meant to be with.
<<<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>>>
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@iyeeeverydee @parisanmorovati @seungmincenteric
@panbish-1209 @fxiry-vtt @sseawavee
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@whoa-jo @meanergreener @rikibun
@ayyonoona @shinywombatcrusade @y4yayael
@skzstan12345 @mariteez @allys-reads
@jazziwritesthings @skzstannie @yongbokkiesworld
@kkkeopi @neverendingstay @moony-9
@minsungsthirdwheel @everlastingspring143 @joyofbebbanburg
@leezanetheofficial @tr-mha-fan @bubbly-moon
@night-storm7 @missmajdastark @axel-skz
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dancingdonatello · 4 months ago
Note
Please do Donnie with a reader who DOES NOT know how to flirt with him🙏🙏🙏 the reader could be like
“Soo ..you come here often ? “ and they are at like the lair or smthing 💀 and maybe the others try to encourage it or smthing sjsjsjsjjs
I LOVE UR FICS SM I CANT STOP REREADING THEM ONG 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑
rise donnie x reader
Donatello was so done with you.
“Yes. I am here all the time.” He didn’t even play along, he just turned back around to his project and continues his work. He ignored you as you stood next to him at a loss for words.
Whatever. Next time, you’d have something better up your sleeve.
Your touch grazed over his muscles and you blinked your eyelashes at him. “You have such… unique skin!” You smiled charmingly at him.
“That sounds vaguely offensive.” Your shoulders drooped and your hand fell away. Yeah, he was right.
You could feel the annoyance radiating off of him. You tensed up. God, why can’t you just be smooth like all the guys in those movies you were watching earlier?
“Your scales are… really sharp?”
“Softshell scales are actually smooth in comparison to other turtles.” He kept scrolling on his phone. You looked over to his brothers. Raph and Miley gave a thumbs up while Leo looked like he was struggling to hold back some laughter.
Next time, you were sitting in the living room together. “You look really nice in this lighting.”
“When it’s pitch black? Are you implying that I look better when your vision is worse?” You started to sweat and turned to watch the movie that was playing. Mikey coughed out a laugh.
Maybe you could get him flowers. You could just be bad with words. You’d have to make up for it with your actions! Besides, Leo said he loved flowers.
You brought him a beautiful bouquet you spent a lot of money on only for him to say that he was allergic. You glared at Leo who attempted to gaslight you into believing that he never suggested flowers.
You’d never win this turtle over. You gave up soon after, only giving him quick glances. You could get over it. You so wouldn’t think about him everyday for the next two years until you found someone else to obsess over. Nope.
But, then, Donnie seemed agitated with you. “Why are you acting so different?” He cornered you soon after you decided to stop bothering him.
“What?” You were confused.
“You’re not…” He waved a hand around. “You know.”
“I don’t know.”
“You’re not…” He grew frustrated, tapping his foot. “…making any more comments.”
“Comments?” You tilted your head. What was he talking about? “You mean, me flirting?”
He looked away and you swore his face was a shade darker than it usually was. “…Yes.”
“…Do you want me to keep doing it?” He just barely nodded.
Oh my god. He glared at you as soon as the uncontrollable grin appeared on your face. You had won him over after all.
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kyaroscuro · 1 month ago
Text
All About You
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Maybe it's all about you when your youth is filled with each other's names and your heart has never changed. That's what Juyeon finds out when he falls in love with his best friend.
pairing : bff!juyeon x gn!reader (+bf to ex!sunwoo) genre : fluff, bestfriends to lovers, slow burn, slight angst but happy ending warnings : swearing/cursing, sex jokes, implied sex, mention of burnout, alcohol consumption, heartbreak, pet names (sweetheart, good girl, pretty, baby) notes : it's been a long road but i'm happy to introduce y'all to my baby! i've been (and still am) obsessed with juyeon since the zeneration 2 concert and i guess i've had a lot to write about him... i hope you'll find out the few references i've managed to sneak in! enjoy ✧.* shout out to my dear @winterchimez for proofreading and helping me during the whole writing process, you were a great help <3 words count : 13745
No one ever told you how relationships work. So when you fell in love with your best friend Juyeon at 16, you felt a little helpless. Should he be the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? Was it wrong to lean on him when he welcomed you into his arms for a movie night? Eventually those feelings faded as you both started dating, and you wondered if it was even true love. Maybe the 16-year-old teenager you were was just attracted to the idea of being close to another soul, mentally and physically.
Maybe yes.
The only thing you know right now at 24, is that the feelings you had for Juyeon back then were nothing compared to the ones you have for Sunwoo today. The attention and love he gives you makes everyone jealous. Even Juyeon himself.
If he wanted to take you out to dinner, you would turn him down because you already had plans with Sunwoo. Arcade, karaoke, late night walks, picnics, fancy restaurants or fast food, you’re always together. Sometimes when you feel like staying in, Juyeon would show up, hoping to watch a movie like the good old days. But he’s met with Sunwoo at the door and doesn’t have the energy to see you being all lovey-dovey.
He knows better than to be a third wheel. As much as he understands the time you spend with your boyfriend, he can’t help but feel jealous and left out. You’re not trying to make him feel that way, you just needed Sunwoo’s presence.
The two of you met in your 3rd year of thesis. He was actually the student under your supervision for his end-of-studies internship. You obviously spent six months seeing each other and working together – in the lab, the library, cafes and even at home. You both grew closer in no time, and that’s only fair given the fact that Sunwoo is a living comedian. You don’t think you would have made it through the whole editing process without his support.
The funniest thing he had ever done was that he was proofreading your work while you did the same for his. Sure enough, you both graduated with the help from one another and a couple of kisses were shared.
From Juyeon’s point of view, those six months felt like an eternity. He had a girlfriend at the time and couldn’t really go out with you. You were both busy for different reasons, but still tried to see each other once a week. But when you did see each other, you always talked about Sunwoo and he talked about his girlfriend. That’s what your lives were made of, but it was a little heartbreaking that you were best friends who only talked about your partners.
“How’s the job hunt going?” He asked at one of your meetings.
“Great actually, I felt like giving up, but I didn’t endure those three years to throw it all away, did I? Sunwoo helped me a lot, he’s my lifesaver.”
Juyeon felt like throwing up, as if his heart had been stepped on the moment he heard those words, and he didn’t know why.
“What about you?” You asked him, cutting his train of thought.
Oh, he knew you were talking about his own job, which he quit a few months ago (more like he’s on a break because he’s burned out). But it’s not like he has to tell you; he doesn’t have the guts to anyway. He thinks you would be sad and angry with him, when all you really want is for him to be happy. And he’s also upset that he’s had to give up on his dream job because it was affecting his health. Thankfully, his boss has been kind enough to give him a chance to rest up for now. Maybe all he needs to keep going is your reassurance?
“We broke up.” He says quietly, looking down at his hands.
“I’m so sorry Juyo, aren’t you too sad?” You say as you reach out to him.
“To be honest, I am.” He admits, looking up at you, a small smile forms on his lips. “It was a mutual agreement, but I feel like I screwed it up. She said I needed to think about my own needs and wants.”
“And what do you want?”
“To spend time with you.” He says straightforwardly.
Your cheeks flushed at his sudden comment. Has he always been so honest?
“I’m free tomorrow if you’re fine with that? Sunwoo is going out with his band.” You say, eager to spend more time with him. “Oh, and Juyo; you should know that I will always make time for you. You’re a big part of my life and I care about you more than anyone else so please do not hesitate to reach out if you need anything. I’m just one call away.”
“I know that but I always seem to bother you.” He says, a little ashamed to think so.
“You don’t. What makes you think that?” You frown at his words, wondering if he actually meant them. “You have no idea how much I look forward to our weekly meetings! It keeps me going during the week, I swear, ask Sunwoo he only hears about you.”
“Oh,” he responded, feeling delighted with your words.
“Yes Juyo, I miss you a lot.” You gasped shyly, suddenly very focused on your hot cup.
“I miss you even more.” He looks for your eyes with a hint of fondness that you don’t notice, even when you raise your head to tell him,
“So tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow,” he smiles, pleased to see you smile back with the same touch of affection.
When you think about it, you don’t understand how it is possible to break up with Lee Juyeon. You didn’t really know the girl he was dating, you never met her, you only saw her face in a picture once. But you do know your best friend, and he’s not the type to break someone’s heart. He would fight for the person he loves, even if it doesn’t work out. Juyeon is love personified. So how can you reject him?
Woo ☼ (3)
Sweetheart I miss you
When are you coming back home
I have a present for you
What kind of present?
Me ;)
OMW
Juyo <3 (1)
Thanks for today, I can’t wait for tomorrow. Pick you up at 10?
Will be pretty and ready!
Always pretty but ready? I’m looking forward to it
As soon as you read his message, your heart began to thump real loud and your cheeks immediately flushed red. Who are you and what have you done to Juyeon? When did he become so flirty? Or maybe he has always been like this and you never cared before. But why do you even care now? 
When you were 16, you remember vividly how he kissed your hand goodbye because he was a gentleman and you were a darling. Everyone at school made fun of you for being so old-fashioned, but little did they know that you liked it. Eventually, when you turned 17, he dropped the act and started kissing your forehead instead. It was a hundred per cent worse. Your cheeks turned pink every time you thought about it and people were calling you out for being highkey on PDA and asking you to spare the singles.
Maybe then he was always this flirty.
It didn’t matter much to you because it was puppy love. The first man you ever loved. Until Sunwoo came into the picture.
“How was your date sweetheart?” You laugh into the kiss he greets you with.
“Pretty good, I think I’m developing feelings, I don’t know, he’s just so sweet and- Ouch Sunwoo!” You yelped, surprised by his sudden, somewhat erotic gesture.
“What?” He giggles innocently.
“You didn’t have to pin me against the wall, did you?” You ask rhetorically, knowing full well what his answer will be.
“I did,” his sparkling eyes turn to onyx, his tongue runs over his lips and his gaze travels up and down your body as he answers.
“Yeah?” You whisper, aroused by his deep voice.
“Yes.”
His plump lips are all over yours in an instant, taking your breath away. To deepen the kiss and emphasise his need to be closer, he grabs your legs so you can wrap them around his waist and welcome him in. Your arms wrap around his neck as you yield, kissing him back with passion and love. He doesn’t let go until you’re both out of breath, and then he kisses you again and again like a madman. Eventually, you’re so lost in the pleasure of his kisses that when you feel him nipping at your neck, you push him away, panting.
“I understand that Juyeon is your best friend,” he says with a heavy voice. “But you can’t joke about dating another man.”
He doesn’t give you a chance to answer as he runs his tongue over your lips before kissing you lazily. You stick out your tongue, waiting for him to resume his kiss. He chuckles at your behaviour but kisses you nonetheless.
“Good girl hm, are you hungry?” He utters with lustful and honey dripping eyes.
“Let’s take this into the bedroom then.” At his promise to take you to heaven, you nod eagerly, excited to see what he has planned for you.
You don’t quite remember what happened after that, too lost in lust and love. You felt the kisses on your forehead and the caresses in your hair before he left the bed.
Suddenly, nothing. All you felt was emptiness.
You turn to check your phone when you yelp in pain because your back hurts. Your man was a beast last night.
Wait.
9:30am?
You hurriedly get out of bed, taking in your dishevelled appearance and the hickeys Sunwoo had the courtesy to leave on your body. You’re ashamed to go out like this, because you know that you have little to no time to cover them up.
More importantly, Juyeon will notice them. It’s not that you cared about exposing your sex life, you have a lot of fun with Sunwoo and he’s the greatest in and out of bed. But for Juyeon to see you in such a vulnerable way? It does something to you and you can’t figure out why.
You never talked about your sex life with Juyeon although you are best friends; you two are kind of secretive. Sure, there were times when you complained that your exes were terrible kissers or that dates were horrible. But when it comes to any form of intimacy, it was out of the books. You both never joked about kinks, never asked about turn-ons. Yet, you shared your very first kiss with Juyeon when you were 16.
It was a bit messy and hilarious because you had no idea what you were doing. You remember how when he dropped you off after school or after a playdate, he had this cute habit of kissing your hand goodbye. It was also at that age when you started going to parties – a party between friends, no alcohol, maybe just some cheap beer that tasted like grass. But that was fun and it was also the time when you were introduced to love, through couples and kisses.
Love has always been a foreign language to you. You know for a fact that love is what your parents share with each other, through physical touch, words of affirmation, acts of service, quality time, gifts but also through struggles.
But you also know that the person you’re closest to doing those things is Juyeon. You both were always cuddling, fighting over movies or places to eat. You both would also cheer, support and reassure each other.
You both would always have each other on your minds, sending texts, calling or buying sweet things. It’s only fair that you thought you were in love with him, isn’t it?
And that faithful night, at your birthday party, he thought it would be a great idea to carry you and run around in circles until he lost his balance and fell with you laying on top of him. You didn’t know what was going through his mind, but you saw flames in his starry eyes, and then he pecked at your lips. He brushed it off by pulling you up and wishing you a happy birthday but your heart was racing and so was his.
“Sorry Ju, I woke up late, I didn’t want to keep you waiting,” you pout as you reached his car, pressing a kiss on his cheek.
“Thank god your prettiness makes up for lost time,” he jokingly hugs you, his hands laying a little low on your waist. “But you have to take responsibility for making me wait.”
“Juyeon! It’s been 5 minutes you can’t blame me for the delay!” You wriggle into his embrace and put your head in the crook of his neck, a little embarrassed but wanting to be close to him.
“I can, and that’s exactly what I’m doing,” he whistles, taking you out of his arms to observe the love bites on your fair skin. “Maybe you’d be on time if you hadn’t had so much fun last night.”
“Y-Yeah, I walked into a trap,” you stammered, speechless.
“The kind of trap you can’t refuse, I bet.”
And he opens the passenger door before giving you his hand to help you get in. You look at his hand and then straight into his eyes to understand where that confidence comes from, but he just smiles and nods.
“Come on, we have much to do before the carriage turns into a pumpkin.” He smiles and fights with the wind to tuck a wild strand of hair behind your ear.
Spending time with Juyeon is one of the things you adore the most in the world. You were so used to spending your days with him when you were teenagers that you almost forgot what it was like. The princess treatment, the cafe dates, the shopping and giving opinions on outfits, the restaurants. Now that you’re all grown up, reliving those moments feels a little bit odd but great. After all, you’re the same people who dance to the music in every corner shop and laugh at every silly move you make.
Going out with Juyeon is also all about treats and gifts. You have this implicit rule that when you’re out and about, you’re encouraged to pay in turns – be it at the restaurants, bars or for desserts. And of course, he pleases you more often than you please him, but you tend to buy more things related to him – matching items or clothes that reflect his style.
“Look at this cute bracelet! We should get it to celebrate our 10 years offriendship,” you beamed, slipping the bracelet around his wrist without a word of protest to see how it looks.
“But it’s paired with a promise ring?” He comments, in case you haven’t noticed and had a change of heart.
“Then we can get the ring in another 10 years,” you giggle and squeeze his hand to reassure him that this is what you want.
Happy with your little joke, you went to the cashier to buy the bracelets. But it sparked something within Juyeon’s heart. He may be slow to understand, but you don’t have to tell him twice. You consider him to be your significant other. That’s what a promise ring means.
After all, you wanted to commit yourself to him for the rest of your life. You’re his best friend and that should be normal. It is normal to stick by each other’s side. But why is his heart missing a beat?
If you ask Juyeon about his relationship with you, he would describe it as “enchanting”. You’re the most important thing to him. Ever since he bumped into you in 3rd grade, you two have been inseparable. But there’s something that’s always bothered him.
In the beginning, he thought it was because you were the only one that he was really close to. He didn’t look at you any differently. But every time you smiled, he felt a twist in his stomach. Then he made it his goal to make you blush and to kiss your hand. It was thrilling to see you all flustered by his own actions.
He grew up and unfortunately that feeling never went away. In the end, he thought that maybe it was just the hormones. A 16-year-old boy needs to get to know his body and its needs. That’s what he did. Eventually the feelings vanished, but the uncomfortable feeling stayed. Even when he was with his ex.
He’s well aware that you are in a relationship with Sunwoo and that the two of you are in love. He’s never been happier for you. After all the people who have taken advantage of you, you deserve someone positive. Someone who will be there for you and will make you feel loved and truly fall in love. Like Sunwoo.
And yet, he doesn’t know why he’s so attracted to you. He needs to explore his feelings. At least to understand them. Even if it costs him.
“How about a drink?” He asks as the sun is about to go down.
“No, you need to drive safely.” You flinched, clearly against the idea of losing him in such a stupid way.
“What about my place? You know I have this amazing balcony overlooking the sea.” He offers in return with a smirk.
“Deal,” you say with gleaming eyes.
You love Juyeon’s apartment; it has a soft and romantic atmosphere and it’s even more beautiful when the sun goes down. The many plants he has turn a warm orange with the colours of the sky and you swear, it’s so beautiful, like a haven of peace.
“Red or white?” He asks, holding the two bottles out for you.
“Anything’s fine, choose for me please Juyo,” you sing-song, happy to share this moment with him.
While you are setting up his balcony table with candles and wine glasses, he returns with a red bottle and appetisers. He gestures for you to sit on the bean bag and pour the wine like a real chef. You whistle, impressed by his newfound skill. Furthermore, it wouldn’t be Juyeon if he didn’t do a little dance to make you laugh before handing you your glass.
Now that he’s seated, you allow yourself to take in your surroundings. It’s quiet, but you can hear the faint music coming from the living room speakers. Juyeon has never liked the silence, so he always needs to have some kind of background music to feel comfortable. He says it calms him down, especially when he’s nervous, and you have to agree with that.
But does that mean that he was nervous right now?
He never needed music with you, as he always said your voice was his own melody – the harmony he couldn’t get enough of. 
“Thank you,” he whispers, pulling you out of your reverie.
You nod, knowing exactly what he means, and reach out to take his hand. He intertwines your fingers and, in the pink-orange hues of the sky you catch yourself blushing. You risk a glance to see him starring absent-mindedly into space and you seize the opportunity to stare him down.
His bangs, usually on his forehead are pushed back, giving him a more mature and sexy look. His eyes, in a beautiful crescent shape, shine with the intensity of the stars. His pretty nose sits up on his face, like a trophy ready to be claimed. And his lips. They’re curled into a gentle smile.
Without a care in the world, he runs his tongue over them and opens them as if he wanted to speak. But no sound comes out, except for the tongue he’s now biting. Suddenly, as if he was aware that you are looking at him, he turns to meet your gaze. Truth be told, you weren’t very discreet. His dark eyes hold yours, then move to your lips, and you see the faint beginnings of a smirk on his lips before he bursts into laughter. 
“Like what you see?” He points out, all smug.
That fucker.
You slapped him playfully before you realised you were biting your lips. Yet, he still looks at you as if you were the one who hung the stars in the sky and shone in their place.
All of a sudden, his eyes turn mischievous and you find yourself in his arms as he leads you into the living room. He turns up the music, grabs the camera, puts on a pair of framed glasses and starts dancing. You joined him, because there is no world in which you wouldn’t follow Juyeon. You dance like you’re in a club, grab the wine bottle and shout the lyrics at the top of your lungs. Juyeon films you through the mirror and you play along, you’re the model, he’s the artist. Until he puts the camera in a corner to film the both of you and starts to dance an old choreo that you both did. You smile broadly and the night goes by like this. In between drinking and dancing.
At some point, you find yourselves taking a stroll, jumping and dancing around poles. Oh, but you’re not drunk! Juyeon took out his camera and kept filming you, laughing. The man was hyping you up, the street was your runway! And even though it was a little embarrassing, you had a lot of fun. Trust Juyeon to make you feel the best!
Around midnight, you were eating ice cream in the nearest park when your phone screen lit up with a call.
Woo ☼.
Oh, no. You forgot to inform him you were going out with yesterday’s activities.
“Babyyyyy,” he whines, sounding tired, “where you aaaat.”
“At Juyeon’s, we-“ You’re cut off as Juyeon steals your phone, brushing against your hands a little too long.
“Sorry,” he hiccups, “is it all right if we keep each other company for the night? I can’t drive right now.” Juyeon tries to apologise but is cut short by Sunwoo.
“Had a fun night I see?”
You can feel his anger rising from the way his voice drops an octave. Sunwoo has always been jealous of Juyeon. When you got together, he was very insecure at first, knowing that you had a male best friend and seeing you spend so much time with him. It took some time, but the trust you’ve built up has overcome that awful feeling.
You still have to reassure him sometimes, and that’s okay because Juyeon is your best friend and Sunwoo is your boyfriend. You love them both in different ways. You talked about it with Juyeon and later he got jealous because you spent all your time with Sunwoo on your trip to comfort him. It wasn’t easy, but they learnt to trust you. Along the way, you may have convinced yourself that everything would be fine.
“Sunny, baby, I’m sorry I didn’t inform you. I will sleep at Juyeon’s and be back first thing in the morning before you wake up,” you say in a soft voice, trying to soothe him.
“I’m sorry too,” he voices out, letting out a breath lost in his own emotions, “I panicked when I didn’t see you at home. But I’m glad you’re all right.”
“I know,” you sighed, glancing at Juyeon, “I’m in good hands, I promise.”
“Hurry back, I miss my goodnight kiss already.” He replies, seemingly content with the current arrangement.
“Will be there in no time,” you giggled.
“I love you,” he answers, a smile blooming in his voice.
“I love you too.”
He hangs up just as he called, smiley, which makes you beam in return. However, when you turn to face Juyeon he’s anything but smiling. In his frowning eyes you decipher a sombre mood. Something in complete contrast to the joy you shared tonight. You reach out to grab his hand, but he pulls it back before you can do so.
“We should head back, it’s getting late.” He says firmly.
Your heart breaks at his words. Without giving him a chance, you cupped his face, forcing him to look at you. The hurt look in his eyes makes your heart swell. You scan him to see if he wants to answer, but he avoids you. You’re so close and yet so far away. You feel like throwing up, because your best friend never acted like this around you. He never once avoided you nor stopped talking to you. Thus, you did the only thing you can think of.
You hugged him, as tightly as you can.
You feel his heart pounding and wonder if it’s from the unknown emotions he’s carrying or from your physical touch. You put your hand on his broad chest to feel his heartbeat and plant a kiss on it to reassure him. It stirs something in Juyeon and he hugs you back so tightly you think you’ll lose your breath. He holds you in his arms for what seems like an eternity, your head nestled in the crook of his neck. But you don’t complain, you felt safe.
You stay there, in the warm embrace that contrasts with the cool of the night, squeezing him a little tighter when you hear passers-by whistling lovingly at you. When he lets go, you can see the faint pink colour that tints his cheeks, brought out by the street lights. But little did you know that you have the same colours on your face, if not stronger?
“You okay?” You ask as you rub small circles on his back.
“Yes I am,” he lies openly in a husky voice, “I’m okay.”
Juyeon is fucked. Completely screwed. He’s absolutely, unquestionably and sincerely in love with you.
He has been for quite some time, now that he thinks about it. But he never admitted it. That damned twist in his gut that never left his mind, he knows where it comes from now.
In order to cope with his newfound feelings he lets you use the bathroom first while he changes the sheets and tidies up the living room. He’s floating, not sure if he will ever get a wink of sleep. Especially if you both sleep in the same bed. Because to you, he’s just your best friend, the one you’ve slept with countless times. No strings attached.
He can’t imagine you in his arms, nor can he look forward to waking up by your side. You’re not his.
“Juyo?” Your tired voice echoes from the corridor. “C-Can I get some clothes?”
Oh. That doesn’t mean anything. You have always shared clothes. Then why was he so excited to see you in them? Right, because he’s madly in love with you and knows you will look ravishing in his big shirt. Also because sharing clothes is such an intimate thing couples do. If he lends you his current pyjamas because they have his scent on them, you couldn’t blame him. He’s just a man.
“Are you coming?” You inquire, walking towards him.
It’s worse than anything he’d ever imagined. The shirt is definitely too big for you going down one shoulder, showing the beginning of your chest and reaching halfway up your thighs. What’s more, your pretty thighs are covered by the shorts that rises up when you sit next to him. He looks away, embarrassed to be staring at you.
“I will sleep on the couch, don’t worry about me.”
“No way,” you retorted with little energy left, “your bed is big enough for both of us.”
He’s been acting strange today. First he was feeling all overconfident, then flirtatious, followed by anger, and now shyness and embarrassment. You take a piece of the blanket lying on his lap and you stretch your legs out on the sofa, letting your head fall on his shoulder. Sleep can wait, Juyeon can’t.
“Are you sure you’re okay? Don’t lie to me.” You ask, breathing softly into his ear.
“No,” he shudders, with a faraway look in his eyes, “I’m not okay and I don’t know how to get through this.”
“What’s wrong Juyo? Do you want to talk about it?” You pause to gauge his reaction. “Is it about your ex?”
“More or less,” he breathes out. “The breakup wasn’t that bad, like I said, it was a mutual decision. It’s just- when you started dating Sunwoo I was so happy for you, happy that you found someone who was worthy of your love and loved you the right way. And I thought I would be happy if I found that special someone, I longed for it. But I ended up in different relationships throughout the year, never lasting more than two months. And that’s ok, maybe they weren’t the right person for me, maybe it wasn’t the right time, maybe this, maybe that. I really thought I was going to be happy and I ended up getting my heart broken every time. As much as I believe now that I don’t deserve to be loved. I think I went into my last relationship in that state of mind, and I think she felt it too. Hard not to, is it? We had long talks and great times together; I think I really liked her. And I know she liked me back, I’m just not ready to be in an exclusive relationship right now.”
And everything he said is true, he’s more than happy for you and he thought he would be happy. But he can’t be happy in a relationship that isn’t with you.
“There’s also something I’ve never told you,” he continues, sniggering at the absurdity of his reasoning. “Something I should have told you a long time ago, it doesn’t make me proud, and it sort of reflects why my love life was so messed up. I can’t say it’s the only reason, but it played a big part in my mental health.”
You want to cry so badly, he has endured it all alone and it must have weighed heavily on him. At this point, you’re just waiting to speak and respond but every word that comes out of his beautiful mouth leaves you speechless. You’re such a bad friend that you’ve never noticed the way his eyes get dark and gloomy, or how he cancels your plans at the last minute because he’s got something else planned. When in fact it was sadness overload. Sure everyone has their own coping mechanisms, you wish you could have been there for him, but here you were Juyeon letting you in and you’re here to stay.
“It’s been two months since I was diagnosed with burnout and stopped working. It started off as something mild when I came home more exhausted than usual. I thought I wasn’t getting enough sleep but then I started to feel mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted. It was hard to concentrate on my daily tasks and you know how much I love my job? I felt like I was going to die because I couldn’t even have fun doing what I love. Going out with you, my friends or my ex felt great, but I wasn’t as invested as I used to be.” He pauses to catch his breath and swallow back the tears.
“Don’t get me wrong, today was absolutely perfect and I was hyped, I still am. Today felt like going back to when we were sixteen and I loved it. I’m actually starting to feel better. The break up helped a lot because it was taking a toll on my mental health. I know I said I liked her and I did, but I couldn’t help but feel unwanted. Even when she was riding me,” he chuckles, trying to lighten the mood.
“And it hurts that I didn’t have the guts to talk to you about it because I was afraid of how you would react. Like, hello, I’m taking a break from work because I feel like shit? And I would really like to get your approval so that I can move on. Because you mean everything to me,” he ends shyly.
“Juyeon,” you say in a soft and caring voice, “you mean the world to me too.”
You continued. “You mean the whole world to me and I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me the most. I could come up with something, but it wouldn’t make up for what you’ve been through. You are strong, stronger than anyone. It’s so hard to keep your head above water that I’m proud of you for speaking up and even stopping work. Because focusing on your health is the most important thing. Situation and money may go but I will always stay. I’m so proud of you, proud of who you are and who you’re becoming. You’ll never stop growing and I’ll be there every step of the way, watching you blossom and be happy.”
“And I know you feel like you’ll never be happy,” you resumed, holding his hand. “The only thing I can say is, as hard as it seems, everything you live makes you stronger. Even more beautiful. There’s someone in this world waiting patiently for you, to love you properly, to make you feel loved and wanted. You’re an exceptional person, Juyeon. By that I mean you go above and beyond the call of duty, you give your total support and care, you show up when something’s wrong and I bet you’re an even more protective lover. We did everything together, cried, laughed, smiled, loved. My youth was filled with you and I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t happy because you were and are always by my side.”
“Today was the best time I’ve had in weeks, and that’s because I am with you. We danced, a lot. And you know how dancing has always been our escape,” you paused as you saw the first hint of a smile creep across his face as you continued. “I saw your smile, it was genuine and you were so beautiful. It may have been hard, you’ve been hard on yourself, but today the man I saw was happy. I’m happy because you’re happy, and I’m sad when you’re sad. We are one Juyeon, and I want you to know that I’m here for you, always.”
Long before you have finished speaking, he has taken you in his arms. His embrace is not heavy, but you can feel the weight on his shoulders lighten. You have so many feelings for him, they all blend together and you don’t seem to feel the butterflies in your stomach or the fire he has lit in your heart.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he confesses.
“And what would I be without you?”
Your head rests on his chest and he’s suddenly afraid you can hear his heart beating. You’re so beautiful, your tired eyes fighting sleep and your lashes fluttering. His shirt slipped off your shoulder as he held you in his arms and the permanent smile on your face makes him completely weak. He could kiss you right now. If only you were single.
“Let’s go to sleep, hm?” He caresses your face, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Together?” You cracked yet another smile.
“Together,” he grins from ear to ear.
Your arms find their way around his neck and you bend your head to make an implicit request. His hands go around your waist and below your knees before he stands up and carries you bridal style. You both laugh at the absurdity of the situation, but also blushed at the romantic gesture. He sets you down on (what his brain calls) your side of the bed and plants a kiss on your forehead.
He then goes through his nightly routine before coming back to you, wrapped in the covers, fast asleep. His heart is about to explode. Now that he is aware of his feelings, he is overwhelmed by the love he has been repressing. He slides in next to you and holds back from embracing you. And if you happen to get close and make your way into his arms, he’ll be delighted to hold you tight.
“Sleep well Starlight, I love you,” he mumbles, kissing your hair.
“I love you more Juyo.”
Waking up the next morning wasn’t as awkward as Juyeon might have thought after the pseudo-confession you heard. He woke up first when he felt you shift in his arms. Because yes, you ended up in his arms, face against his torso. He tried not to make a big deal out of it, calming his breathing and enjoying the warmth of your body. Absentmindedly, his hand caresses your tangled hair, smoothing it and slowly waking you from your slumber.
“Good morning Starlight,” he says, honey dripping from his hoarse voice. “Slept well?”
“Like a baby, you?” You yawned, looking up from his chest.
“Even better than a baby.” He doesn’t want to let you go, once you’re out of his bedroom he’ll have to go back to his little miserable life without your starlight to light it up.
“Shall we take you home? Your boyfriend might get impatient,” he laughs, remembering the events of the previous night.
“Well, he’ll have to wait until I’m full from breakfast! I know someone who makes pancakes to die for,” you winked as you get out of his clothes and disappear into the bathroom.
You know you said you’d be back before he wakes up, and you want to. You miss him. But being in Juyeon’s arms, feeling the regular beat of his heart, makes you feel at home. You don’t want to end what you both have now.
You eat breakfast in relatively silence, except when Juyeon tries to flip the pancakes in the frying pan only to have one stick to the wall. And you watch him adoringly from where you sit, trying to make up for his silliness.
In the end, you leave his apartment in no time at all, dreading your return to your own home. Even though you know that Sunwoo is patiently waiting for you. The last two days you spent with Juyeon were out of time, it was an enchanted interlude and the return to real life suddenly seems very difficult.
He drops you off in front of the building, not without kissing you on the cheek and saying goodbye for the last time. You try not to think of it as a date night as you head for the front door but he’s quick to say “We’re not done yet, you’ll see me more often now” he chimed as he watches you smile and gets in.
The smile doesn’t leave your face until you turn the key in the lock and come face to face with Sunwoo, smiling from head to toe. He takes you in his arms and spins you around before planting kisses all over your face.
“Sunny,” you giggled, “please.”
“But I missed you,” you press a kiss to his lips as he answers, and you feel him smile through it.
“I’m sorry I overreacted, you know I get scared easily, but I shouldn’t take it out on you when you haven’t done anything,” he apologised, bowing his head.
“No, it’s my fault too,” you shake your head. “We had a crazy night and when I woke up you were gone. I was also late and didn’t want to keep him waiting.”
“You know that I’m jealous of Juyeon, right? He might be your best friend, but he might see you as more than that. You can’t say you didn’t want him to wait, because what, you’re willing to make me wait like yesterday but not him? It’s unfair, because you always end up prioritising him.” He bellows, frustrated.
“Sunwoo please,” you begged. “Sunwoo, listen to me, please.” He takes a step back, feeling his anger rising.
“To say what? That you needed to be with him? That he needs you? Bullshit, look me in the eye and tell me he doesn’t have feelings for you!” He shouts in a pissed off rage.
He goes back into the living room and you follow him to see him pacing back and forth. You can tell he’s furious. He always gets angry when you mention Juyeon and it pisses you off. You can’t even spend a day with your best friend because he gets jealous? You’ve been together long enough to think he’s finally understood that he’s the one you love. But as displeased as you are, you’ll never stop telling him and reminding him that you love him. Because couples fight, because he’s insecure and because you care.
“You might as well develop feelings for him!” He spits vociferously.
“He broke up with his girlfriend and lost his job,” you drop, tired of this pointless battle. “So yes, he needed me. And yes, I needed to be with him. I feel like an absolutely shitty friend because I’ve been sitting in his company for weeks and I didn’t even notice that his heart was being broken to pieces. You can shout at me as much as you want Sunwoo, but you’re the one I love. Juyeon may need me again in the future and I’ll be there for him, but at the end of the day I love you and only you.”
“You’re lying. T-There’s no way he…“ He tries to take your hand but you step back, annoyed.
“Have I ever lie to you, Sunwoo?”
The sheepish and upset look on his face is enough to tell you that he’s blaming himself. So you lead him over to the sofa and tell him everything, from the break-up to his exhaustion, which means burnout, but leave out the private details. It’s a lot to take in, and you wonder if he’ll ever believe you. Why would you lie about something so important?
You love Sunwoo, you really do. But you can’t help but be a little irritated by his behaviour. You feel terrible for even thinking and feeling this way, but Juyeon is your best friend! What was wrong with that? What doesn’t he understand about the word “best friend”? You sighed as you take him in your arms and stroke his back, both to calm him down and to ease your own mind. You hold each other for a while, for as long as your hearts desire, but your minds wander to Juyeon. You miss him and you wonder what he’s up to, when you’ll see each other again. Another sigh escapes your lips and Sunwoo looks at you questioningly.
“Movie?” You ask, trying to divert your attention from Juyeon.
“It’s 11,” he chuckles, finally at peace.
“Yeah, so? We can order pizzas and spend the day at home?” You kiss his hand with doe eyes.
“Sounds like a fabulous idea,” he quickly grabs his phone to place an order, “same as usual?”
“I’m feeling adventurous today, so pick whatever you like!”
You hear your own phone buzzing as he focuses on the app again. And obviously it’s the boy of all the arguments, the one who’s been on your mind since you got home and who seems to be distracting you a lot.
Juyo <3 (1)
I miss ya, whatcha doing?
Thinking about u
That ain’t possible
Whyyyy
Because I’m thinking about you
“Who are you talking to with that smiley face?” Sunwoo asks, tilting his head.
“Changmin, he’s talking about the person he met and he seems so in love.”
It's a half-hearted lie, because Changmin told you about the person he recently met, but also because if you say Juyeon's name right now, civil war will break out.
Juyo <3
Oh yeah, prove it?
Seconds later, your phone rings with an incoming call from Juyeon.
Juyo <3
JUYEON YOU CAN’T DO THIS
YOU SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME
Aw pretty’s scared by a sudden phone call?
Actually…
You take a second to answer, pondering if it’s a good idea to tell him about your couple’s conflict. Especially when he’s the one causing it.
Juyo <3 (1)
Am I disturbing you?
You always turn my world upside down
Same goes for you Starlight ;)
So?
I had a fight with Sunwoo
Nothing bad, we already made up
But it’s becoming a recurring thing, and I hate it
Have you talked about it?
That it’s getting hard for you?
Yes and no
We always talk about it, set limits and make up but weeks later it’s as if the conversation never happened
As much as I love him I’m tired Ju
No, you don’t have the right to say you’re tired, because that would mean you’re ready to give up on your relationship for a few fights?
I’m afraid that’s not a valid reason
And I know you’re not the type to give up on someone you love
So take matters into your own hands, spend the day with him and make out ffs
Yeah, haha, you’re right
We’ll eat pizzas and watch a film, that’ll definitely help
And I’ll see if he’s nice enough to make out with him
I can be good for you instead ;)
Yah! You’re losing points Lee Juyeon!
I’m only aiming for the 10s sorry!
Right in the bull’s eye
Which is my heart yes
GTG JUYO
TTYL I LOVE YOU
<3
And I love you more <3
You saw his message through the notification, which you cowardly rejected, but that didn’t stop you from smiling. The conversation had to end quickly, as you were venturing into uncharted territory that doesn't leave you impassive. Besides, Sunwoo was getting suspicious of your big smile.
And he’s right, because what the hell was that? You’re such a coward whose heart beats a hundred miles an hour. He’s definitely winning points, but you’ll never admit it, and to what end? Your heart doesn’t know yet.
On the contrary, Juyeon’s heart beats wildly at your bravery. He doesn’t want to flirt despite his growing feelings, but you leave the door open too wide for him not to come in.
You’re still his best friend, so if you ever need advice or a listening ear, he’ll be there. Like that horrible joke about making out, he hated it. But he knew that it would make you laugh and feel better, because he knows you better than anyone else.
So why can’t he read your feelings? You're not usually so cryptic for no reason, he's sure of that. Yet the changes in your heart can be seen gradually: your sweet words, as well as the ambiguous ones, all carry a special and deep meaning. You’re a book Juyeon is dying to read, but you’re not descriptive enough for him to decipher just yet.
Sunwoo used to read you easily, but he’s not sure of anything anymore. He knows that you love him, that your love language consists of words of affirmation and that you never stop reminding him of it. And yet his insecurities always get the best of him and you end up fighting. The truth is, he’s afraid. You’ve always spent a lot of time with Juyeon and that’s fair, you’ve known each other for almost ten years. But shouldn’t you make up for that time with your one-year boyfriend?
He knows he can’t restrict you or your outings, that would be a dick move and he’s not a dick. You have lots of boy friends and he’s okay with that, but Juyeon? Juyeon annoys him. He seems too perfect to be true:  his looks, his gentle and romantic nature. He’s in a one-sided competition because Juyeon couldn’t care less. Or so he thought until now.
Halfway through the film, you're cuddled up in his arms, laughing, when his phone vibrates. Why on earth is Juyeon texting him?
Juyeon (1)
I just wanted to apologise for yesterday. This is not a valid reason, but I wanted to keep my best friend to myself for a while. I’m sorry if that hurt you.
Apology accepted. We’re adults and you’re defo not the one to blame but I appreciate it.
Thanks man
It cost Juyeon a lot to send that message. But in his place, he would have been furious if the situation had happened to him. So he toned it down, to ease the tension and make you feel better. But he’d do it again any time; anything to spend time with you.
And that’s exactly what happened in the weeks that followed.
You spent the whole week with Sunwoo after your meeting with Juyeon, going with him to his band rehearsals, shopping for clothes, accessories or window shopping, going on dates to the cinema, the park and restaurants. You did everything with him.
But that didn’t stop you from texting Juyeon every day. Sometimes he was the one who initiated the conversation, and other times you had to spam him to ask his opinion on the latest clothes you bought or because you missed him. Your weekly outings have also become two or three times a week, and you often meet up on his balcony for a night of dancing and drinks.
Everything is done with respect for your relationship, but you feel his hands on you longer than necessary, always within limits and sometimes in places that make you blush. For an example, he would place them on your hips, and you would be a fool to say that his little touches did not make your heart flutter. When he opens the door for you, when he orders for you without asking and never makes a mistake, or even when he gives you presents that you’ve looked at with envy. He’s so observant and attentive that causes butterflies in your stomach. The more time you spend with him, the more you can’t deny the attraction you feel.
He makes you feel like you are 16 again.
He kisses your forehead, cheek or hand when he drops you off. He holds your hand so you don’t get lost in the crowd. Even if it’s just an excuse, you let him because deep down you want him to.
And you hated yourself for it. You feel so guilty about Sunwoo. Yes, Juyeon may be a little more enterprising than usual, but he hasn’t changed his ways. You’re the one who reacts to harmless words and lazy touches. But your heart hasn’t changed. You love Sunwoo. Those feelings for Juyeon aren’t real. It is an attraction that arises because you spend all your time together, because he’s handsome and cares for you.
You’re not… in love with him.
Isn’t that right?
“Sweetheart, I bought fried chicken on the way home!” Sunwoo says one day after his rehearsal.
“Oh Sunny, you don’t know how much I’ve been craving it,” you clap, looking forward to devouring it. “Thank you.”
“Can I get a hug for being the most awesome boyfriend ever?” He asks sweetly.
“Oh you do,” you giggle, jumping into his arms.
“I love you,” he kisses your nose.
“Me too,” you reply, tiptoeing to kiss his forehead.
“Sunnyyyy,” you call out his name on a Friday afternoon. “Can I go out for the night with Kev, Minnie, Chani and Ju?”
“Sure! Don’t come back too late hm? And be careful.”
“Yes! I’ve got the four horsemen of the apocalypse to look after me and myself!” You laughed.
“Have fun Sweetheart, I love you,” he whispers, kissing your forehead.
“Me toooo Sunny,” you smiled.
And yet, as he does his best to be there for you, to shower you with love and care, you notice that your interactions are gradually diminishing. He’s not the problem but you are. Just like yesterday, you’ve been exchanging messages and at the end of all your conversations you have this cute habit of saying I love you. Except this time, you haven’t replied. You liked his message and replied with a heart.
But that’s not the only case, because you catch yourself not saying “I love you” back when you talk to him. Yet you’re still physically and intimately close. It’s as if you’re giving yourself to him in order to compensate for the emotional changes that you’re going through. And then what? You won’t even be able to kiss him? Hold his hand? Be intimate? You felt terrible, and this has been going on for months.
Perhaps the best (or worst) thing to do is to talk to him about it.
“Sunny? Can we talk?” You say out of the blue one morning.
“Yes baby, tell me?” He replies as he comes out of the bathroom, shirtless.
“Get dressed first,” you giggle.
“Why, don’t you like what you see?” He pouts, crossing his arms to emphasise his torso and you look away, ashamed to be turned on when you’re about to break his heart.
“Oh I do, but you’re distracting me from the point!”
“Sorry, sorry,” he laughs as he pulls on a t-shirt, “is it better now?”
“Yes, thank you,” you sigh.
“Are you okay?” He asks suddenly, sensing your discomfort. “You know you can tell me anything, I’m here for you.”
“Sunwoo, I-“ you take his hand in yours for support. “You need to know that I love you, it has never changed and it will never change, the feelings I have for you are very much real and I cherish them as much as I cherish you.”
“You’re not breaking up, are you? Because I won’t let you.” His eyes are shining now and you want to go back in time. You want to erase everything that has happened in the last two and a half months, the growing romantic feelings and the hurt.
“Sunwoo, I’m not breaking up with you, you’re the person I care about the most in the world, I would never let you down. And I hate myself for what I’m about to say.” You take a deep breath and as you do you know he’s figured it out and tears start to roll down his sweet face.
“I- fell in love with Juyeon,” you drop your head in shame.
You don't have the courage to look up and see the disappointment on his face, but you force yourself to. And when you finally did, his reaction catches you by surprise. It was obviously pain and sorrow, but also resilience?
“May I ask, how?” His voice is low, almost a murmur, but his eyes search yours for the truth.
“I- don’t know, it just happened.”
“Come on, you don’t just fall in love with another man by accident,” he laughs sarcastically.
“And yet I did!” You raise your voice in annoyance. “I didn’t choose it Sunwoo. And I would go back in time if I could!”
He takes a minute to consider your words, to decide whether or not you’re telling the truth. You didn’t expect this conversation to be easy, but he doesn’t make it any easier for you. You expected him to be in denial, to yell at you and cry. Instead he went straight towards the acceptance stage and he had this heartless look on his face. You knew you deserved it because he’s right; you don’t fall in love with another man by chance.
“Does he know? That you-“ he struggles to find the words, but you let him, because it has been hard for you too. You’re in love with your best friend, and you’ve probably been in love with him since you were 16. “That you love him?”
“No, oh god no!” You panic, finally thinking of the consequences, “I wanted to tell you first because I love you and I owe you the truth.”
“But you intend to tell him?” He worries and suddenly you feel like you’re talking to your best friend, the same conversation you had before you started dating Sunwoo.
“No Sunwoo, it was never a question of telling him or not. Yes, I love Juyeon romantically, but you’re my boyfriend. And I’m not trying to fool myself by saying that I still love you, I love you. And I love Juyeon too, but I’m not going to do anything with it.”
“You’re silly,” he chuckles affectionately. “Within the two months since our fight, I’ve watched you for a long time baby. I observed your body movements, your facial expressions and your words, hoping that it was all temporary and that we’d come out of it stronger together. But all I saw was love, but towards someone else. You came home giddy, eyes full of stars. Sometimes even in a frenzy of exaltation from which I found it hard to pull you out, because knowing that you were happy made me happy. So I won’t say that I knew it, but I sensed it. And I know that you love me, I have never doubted it and I don’t doubt it now. But you love him silly. Perhaps even more than you love me. I’m not mad at you, I saw you falling for him, I just ignored the signs. And I know you didn’t choose it, nor did you want to break my heart. Your love for him is stronger and I can hear it. Thank you for telling me, it must have cost you a lot.”
You start to cry, because what else can you do but cry? You love him and it hurts you to hear him say that you love someone stronger. But he’s right. No matter how much you try to deny it, you love Juyeon unconditionally.
“Why,” you cry out.
“Why what baby,” he takes you in his arms, guiding your head in the crook of his neck and your tears start to soak his t-shirt.
“I’m pretty sure I broke your heart and stomped on it, so why aren’t you mad at me? Why are you taking it so well? I don’t understand. I feel like shit and you’re too perfect?”
“You have no idea of the pain, anger and emptiness I feel right now, I’m far from perfect,” his voice falters as he tries to hold back his tears, “but I can’t take it out on you, even though you deserve it, because you didn’t want it? Also because I didn’t speak when I realised you were drifting away. I know you blame yourself, and yes, I am heartbroken, I can’t wait to cry but I don’t want to make you sadder than you already are.”
“I don’t deserve you Sunny, I’m sorry, I love you to the moon and back,” you smile shyly.
“And I love you just as much, thank you for the love that doesn’t make me feel lonely,” he smiles back as he rubs your back in slow motions. “Can I kiss you? One last time?”
“Thought you’d never ask.”
When his lips touch yours, it has never felt better. The kiss is a little salty because you have both been crying, but also sweet. It is your last kiss and you devour each other’s lips as if it were the first, not wanting to part. You quickly run out of air, but he presses his lips to yours to convey his feelings one last time and you smile, knowingly, as you kiss him back.
“You should go to him,” he says, lips swollen and eyes puffy.
“Yes, to be with my best friend. And you should call Eric for the same reason,” you sobbed, and he giggles.
“Coward,” he laughs, “but I will.”
“And Sunwoo,” you start again. “I would never do anything without your approval.”
“Thank you,” he replies, touched and aware of the feelings you will always have for him. “For everything, but especially for being with me.”
“I should be the one thanking you, my lifesaver,” you kissed his cheek as you take his hand in yours. “Let’s remain good friends, in the future.”
“Absolutely, if I ever get over you,” he laughs in a reassuring way.
You know that the joke is just his way of breaking the tension, so you laugh it off, saying that he should, and you imitated a knife at your throat as a warning, which makes him laugh heartily. Then, your heart sinks at the sound of you no longer being the recipient. Yes you fell in love with someone else, and it will be just as hard to get over him. But you have Juyeon, and he’s your rock.
Juyo <3
Juyo can I come over?
Sure, is something wrong?
These three words are enough to turn your heart upside down. He’s always been thoughtful, and now that you’ve accepted your feelings, you feel butterflies swirling in your tummy.
Juyo <3
Sunwoo and I broke up
I’ll pick you up in 5
Yes pls, drive safely
He pulls up in the parking lot exactly 5 minutes after his message, just like he said. You rush down the stairs, too eager to melt into his arms to wait for the lift. He doesn’t have time to get out of the car before you throw yourself on him, crying. Tears of separation and heartbreak, and tears of joy when you see him again because you know you love him.
“I’m here,” he whispers in a panicked voice, probably not expecting you so soon and in such a state. “I’m right here, let it out.”
And you do, the feelings you’ve been burying for 2 months are just waiting to be expressed. You cry until your body aches from lack of air and your eyes are dry. Finally, you shiver and regret having gone out so quickly without covering up. But Juyeon is just as quick to pull the jacket he was wearing over your shoulders and you hum happily as his scent washes over you.
“Let’s go home?” He caresses your hair tenderly.
You’re amazed that he doesn’t ask any questions, he just stands by you and supports you through this difficult ordeal that he knows only too well. And the truth is, he’s even sad for you. No matter how much he loves you, you’re the definition of love to him. For you to break up with Sunwoo, for whatever reason, doesn’t make any sense. It’s not his place to ask if you don’t tell him first, so he just holds your hand on the way back, and when he has to let go to change gear, he makes sure he puts it back on your thigh.
This makes you blush like a tomato, how dare he put his big hand on your thigh, almost completely covering it whole. You’re pretty sure your feelings are written all over your face, but he mistakes your blushing for embarrassment, when in fact it’s just romantic stimulation. You look up to see if his hand placement has any effect on him, only to find that he is blushing as well. Being as dense as he is, you mistook his shyness for embarrassment.
You two definitely make quite the pair.
“Make yourself at home Starlight,” he says as he opens the front door, never stopping to hold your hand.
You step inside as he tells you to and try to take off your shoes, planning to curl up on the sofa under the blanket while you wait for him and his hugs. But he had other ideas as he grabs your wrist to pull you closer, pinning you between him and the newly closed front door. Your surprise translates into a gasp that becomes a choke as he drops to one knee. Your heart pounds in your chest at the way he looks at you, worshipping you. Without warning, he bends down to untie your shoelaces, still smiling and even a little mischievous.
“What?” He smiles proudly. “Can’t I look after my Starlight?”
You open your mouth to speak but no sound comes out, too surprised by his playful tone.
“Cat got your tongue?” He sticks out his tongue as he stands up.
“Yes, you got it!” You slap him gently as a reward for nervousness.
“Not in my mouth though…” He whispers so quietly you almost don’t hear it, and that earns him another slap, only he steps back to avoid your blow and you stumble and fall on top of him.
“I guess it will be easier to carry you now,” he chuckles, kissing your forehead.
He puts his arms under your knees and around your waist and you squeal as he lifts you up, bridal style. This man will be the death of you. Oh, how you would kiss him if you weren’t so heartbroken and hadn’t just broken up. And he would kiss you just as much. You’re both madly in love and it shows.
He wraps you in a blanket as he lays you down on the sofa before kissing your forehead for the umpteenth time. Then he goes into the kitchen and fetches your favourite foods, drinks and desserts, which he sets out on the coffee table. You were surprised by the homemade dishes, as if he’d made them with a special purpose in mind. But he doesn’t say a word or make a comment, he just slips under your blanket when he’s done and hugs you, breathing in your scent.
You stay in each other’s arms for a while, not saying a word, just enjoying your hearts beating in unison. It feels heavenly, relaxing and you can almost feel yourself coming back to life. If Sunwoo was your lifesaver, Juyeon is your guardian angel. He is always looking out for you and giving you his utmost special care, just like right now, for no particular reason (even if there is one now).
He doesn’t pry, he just waits for you to speak while he grabs the remote to put on the latest show you’ve started together and feeds you. You’re quite grateful for the little comments he makes during the show, distracting you from the truth: the burning love you have for him that consumes you. In the end, you tell him that you still love Sunwoo, but that your recent incessant arguments have taken their toll on you.
That, against all odds, you’ve spilt up properly. And that it will be a while before you move on, but that the door is not closed. You made sure to emphasise this part, because what if there’s a small chance that Sunwoo was right and Juyeon is a fool in love with you? You’re not ready yet, but when the time comes, you want to confess your love to him and live out the childhood romance you’ve always dreamed of, until death do you part.
The next few of weeks passed in a blur, and you have basically settled into Juyeon’s apartment – going back and forth to your house to pick up your things and put them in his closets. Your shoes sits nicely in the new shoe rack he bought for you to go out together, and your toothbrush sits proudly next to Juyeon’s. You even have matching ones. Oh, and Juyeon can finally happily say that you’ve got your side of the bed, with your cute belongings on the bedside table and a picture of the two of you at 16 in a frame.
In fact, you slowly become a domestic couple-like going grocery shopping together and going on so-called dates. Life with Juyeon is easy. Whether you go out at dawn or dusk, he’s always with you, matching your pace and holding your hand from the streetlights to the dancing starlight. When you saw your hands touching and your steps overlapping, it reminds you of your first encounter and the fluttering of your heart. How you shyly looked at him, only to see him already looking at you lovingly, red on his cheeks. That cold winter you spent together was actually the warmest moment of Juyeon’s life, and that day might have been the day you hid a present for each other in your sleeve.
Even more slowly, your relationship with Juyeon develops as the months go by. It was hard not for it to blossom, considering the fact that you live together and that you absolutely do everything together, but it’s happening. Juyeon has started to walk around bare chest when he gets out of the shower and sometimes! He even goes to bed naked, with just his pyjama pants hanging low on his hips.
Of course, you get to snuggle up against his warm chest and cuddle to sleep. When it comes to sleeping, you don’t even try to fall asleep on your own side of the bed anymore because you always wake up in each other’s arms. You have definitely grown closer and closer in just a few months.
Your touches with one another have become more sensual and romantic and your words more flirtatious. You wear his clothes more often than usual, sometimes getting out of bed in just his t-shirt and underwear, awakening certain feelings within him. From time to time, he dares to put his hands under your (his) t-shirt and kiss your forehead tenderly, for lack of being able to kiss your lips sensually and make you his, right when you wake up.
“All pretty for me hm?” He said the first time you went to sleep in this garment. “You know I’m just a man.”
And if you sat on his hips to cuddle him afterwards, maybe the message got through. Maybe a little too much, given that a few minutes later he pretended to be in a hurry and the water ran for a long time. He’s just a man.
Yes, your man.
Another time, when you were out shopping at the mall, people addressed you as a couple and you didn’t mind, oh no. Perhaps it was the smiley eye contact you made, or the way he held you in his arms and you leaned into him, almost as if you were going to kiss, that gave it away. At least, that’s what gave Sunwoo, who was watching you nearby, the courage to send you a message.
Woo ☼ (1)
Hi, hello! I saw you at the mall with Juyeon, can we talk? I’m with Changmin, we can ditch them together?
Hi Sunny!!! Sure we can, the cafe nearby?
Juyeon was a little reluctant to leave you alone with Sunwoo due to the countless nights you spent crying and the difficulty you had opening up (not to mention your blossoming love for Juyeon) but he quickly gave up because he knew you wanted it and he was happy to spend time with Changmin. Juyeon is the love of your life and you can’t pretend that he isn’t anymore.
“Hi Sweetheart, I saw you left your shopping bags with your man,” he laughs and you kick him under the table so as not to draw attention to yourself.
“Stop that Kim Sunwoo!” You whine.
“Stop what? Calling you sweetheart or calling him your man?”
“Both!” You laugh embarrassed and shy.
“How are you?” He changes the subject after one last laugh and you’re happy to see that he hasn’t changed, he’s still as playful and lively as ever.
“I’m fine, nothing has really changed since our last messages. I told you I got my dream job, so Juyeon and I are treating ourselves with my first salary. Oh, and Juyeon has also found a new job he’s really enjoying. Hence, the reason why we’re out shopping.” You went on to rave about your everyday life, happy to share this new chapter with him, whom you still love very much, just not romantically anymore.
“You must love him a lot,” he says softly, almost as if he were muttering to himself. “It’s cute, you’re cute, I’m happy for you.” And you don’t answer, curious to hear what he’s going to say next.
“I’ve been thinking about you a lot over the past six months,” he begins. “Thank you for always reaching out to me and not ghosting me despite the break-up, it meant a lot to me. Being away from you has been hard. I will not lie. But it also taught me that I was too dependent on you and it felt great to spend time by myself and with our friends. I got news from them and saw that you were doing well, as anyone going through a break-up would be. And it made me realise that, if you were fine, I should be fine, even if it was just a facade, that somehow the sadness would pass.”
You nod to let him know you’re listening and that you’re on the same wavelength as him.
“And it did,” he whispers almost happily, as if the weight he was carrying close to his heart has been lifted. “I thought I would love you for the rest of my life, but then I met someone.” You gasp at his words and tear up a little.
“It came as a blessing, without me even looking for it, and I can say that I’m happy now. So when I saw you so happy on Juyeon’s arm, looking at him lovingly like he hung the stars in the sky I thought: “Ah, you’re really on cloud nine with him”. I shouldn’t hold you back from your happiness. You have my blessing, not that you need it but date him, kiss him, make love and live happily ever after.” To emphasise his words, he squeezes your hand which he has started to hold somewhere in his monologue, and kisses it.
You swear you didn’t want to cry, and Juyeon will probably be worried to see your swollen eyes, but how can you remain impassive in the face of so much love? It’s true, you held back and would have kissed Juyeon if it wasn’t for Sunwoo. But now you’ll both be happy.
You chatted for quite a while, enjoying your reunion as friends, learning more about the person he had met and ranting about your life with Juyeon, when he appeared before you with Changmin, impatient to get you back. You missed him. How did you manage to live without Juyeon so far? Ecstatic, you jump into his arms and bid your goodbyes promising to meet again soon. As you walk away, Juyeon’s phone beeps and he just shrugs at the message in his inbox with a smile. Then he ruffles your hair, earning a pout from you that he kisses away at the corner of your lips. You wonder what the message was, but the kiss is definitely more important.
Sunwoo (1)
I’ve seen the way you look at each other, it’s full of love. Give it a shot!
Yes, there will be many more kisses now.
And here you are today, on Juyeon’s couch, enjoying your home date for the tenth anniversary of your friendship, with Sunwoo’s blessing in the back of your mind. You spent the day cooking together, sweet and savoury, having fun with the shapes of the cakes and pizzas (hearts and dicks like the children you are), playing games, dancing and listening to music in a good-natured atmosphere.
Today’s a day to celebrate your friendship. Yes friendship, when all you want to do is kiss him senseless. Maybe confessing today is not such a bad idea. Especially when you see him coming out of the shower in all his glory, beads of water running down his naked torso, hair tousled and wet, tongue running over his lips sensuously as he looks you straight in the eye, ready to pounce on you. Oh, and, his cinnamoroll pyjama pants, low on his hips and revealing the Apollo belt of his abs, make you smile as much as it turns you on.
Juyeon takes his place between your legs, smiling, his hot muscular back resting on your chest as he lays his head back on your shoulder, dampening your matching melody pyjamas. He chuckles as he turns his head to see you gawping. His big veiny hand that had been squeezing your thigh flies to your cheek, turning your flushed face towards him so he can kiss the pout at the corner of your lips. His beautiful lips linger a little longer on your neck, but you welcome his touch with open arms and lean into his embrace.
His eyes are full of stars when he rises from your embrace to grab the remote and turn on your series. But he remains seated between your legs, unconsciously resting a hand on your knee to preserve the intimacy you’re so immersed in. You help him on with his t-shirt, not without kissing his shoulder first, making him shiver. And your hands take the opportunity to wander down his torso to his waist, making him smirk as well. You become more and more adventurous, he loves it and can’t wait to run his lips all over your body, discovering all of it.
You place a kiss on the crown on his hair and when you notice that it’s already dry, an idea crosses your mind. Juyeon’s focus is back on the show, so much so that he can barely feel your hands playing with his hair. You give him a rather pleasant massage, moving down to the small of his chest, across his neck and up into his hair, twisting it between your fingers.
“How does it feel?” You murmured in a hushed tone.
“Heavenly,” he moans.
The tension is palpable as you continue your services, your hearts beating wildly, almost as one. He takes one of your hands in his to kiss it, the attention making you blush, before replacing it in his hair and nodding for you to continue. So you undertake one of the most romantic acts of love in your eyes, braiding his hair. Strand by strand, your fingers caress the edges of his face. The braids come undone as quickly as they are made, but he smiles broadly as he touches them, feeling butterflies in his stomach and his heart beating erratically.
“I could see our everyday life like this,” you whisper in his ear. “Together.”
Juyeon, who had been purring at your display of affection, becomes still when he hears your words. He slowly turns to face you with the most charming smile and tenderly takes your hand to place it on his chest, where his heart burns with love. The fire in his eyes burns inexorably, lighting up his already sunny face, unable to leave him. You’re captivated by this intensity and he doesn’t look away, also in love with your sparkling eyes, even when he reaches out to grab a little box that has always been right in front of your eyes. Yes, his love has always been on display. You were just too slow to catch on.
But you get it now. You’re two fools in love.
“You know how our youth is filled with each other’s names?” He says, voice a little hoarse and heart beating fast under your palm. “Well, my heart has never changed, I’ve always wanted to be with you. You are my breath of fresh air, the warmth that keeps me going through the winter, and the words I’m about to tell you will never melt away. My everything is all about you, it has always been about you.” He pauses to take a deep breath and kisses the palm of your hand, which he then links with his own, intertwining your fingers.
“I love you,” he sighs with love and happiness. “I love you so much that I was reading my destiny inside your eyes without even knowing it.” The flame of love he has carried all these years dances in his eyes, making him irresistible and captivating. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you wait for his question, palpitations he feels through your bound hands.
“Would you be mine?” His gaze, dropping to your lips then back to your eyes, is determined as he opens the velvet box to reveal two rings. Not just any rings, the matching promise rings to the bracelets you bought months ago. The ones on your wrists that you’ve never taken off.
As if on cue, as a sign of future commitment, he kisses your left ring finger and places the ring on your right with such tenderness that you almost cry. No, you’re pretty sure tears are rolling down your face because he puts his thumb under your eyes to gently wipe away the tears and kisses the salty drops that have run down your cheeks, close to your lips. With that, you mirror his actions by kissing the ring, his left ring finger and placing it on his right finger with a dazzling smile, as an unspeakable promise – that you’ll spend the rest of your lives together.
“I have always been yours. I love you Juyeon, so much that I’m going crazy.”
Even now, after confessing his feelings and hearing yours, he remains respectful and lets you make the first move with a victorious smile. You grin, feeling the cool material of the ring on your cheek as he cups your face in his hand, reminding you that this is all real and that he loves you.
And he does.
So you finally lean in, closing the gap between you to rest your lips on his. It was meant to be a soft and quick peck, but he captures your body and deepens the kiss, years of longing and wanting not to be wasted, leaving you breathless. His lips search yours every time you pull away, not wanting to let go, intoxicated by your lips and this new closeness. If you spend the rest of the evening making out and exploring each other, no one will say a word. Not even your neighbours.
Ah, you’ve never been in love and wanted to be with anyone as much as you do with him, and this since you were 16.
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forcemeanakin · 1 year ago
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ᴠɪᴄᴛᴏʀɪᴀ'ꜱ ꜱᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ ᴀɴɢᴇʟ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ x ʜᴀʏᴅᴇɴ ᴄʜʀɪꜱᴛᴇɴꜱᴇɴ
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Okay so this is a alternate of @hanasnx starlet!reader but with my own little twist because I just love the scenery and the glamour of the shows <3 So I present to you: VSangel!reader x Hayden Christensen (let's ignore the fact that I've been working on some of these scenarios for YEARS now).
This is hella long and nsfw, so beware. 3K.
Previous inspo: Link
BACKGROUND:
Hayden has probably seen you in a big billboard before, maybe an ad on TV, but didn't remember your name. He thought you were hot though. A pretty little thing that was probably out of an old man's league anyway.
You are in your 20's, so you grew up with the Star Wars prequels and without a doubt Anakin Skywalker was your childhood crush. Posters on your walls, watching other movies Hayden was in just to see him. Most of your classmates probably made fun of your Star Wars obsession because you were only into it because of the hot guy in Revenge Of the Sith. How wrong they were!! It was also because of the hot guy in AOTC!
Also you're like a total SW geek, but we'll talk about it later.
THE BEGINING: How did you two meet?
Considering that both of you are from different areas of show business, you had to meet in a common ground. I don't see Hayden going to a fashion show before you (and then that's the only place paparazzi can catch him for sure <3). So after a lot of thought, you two met at an Award show (my mind goes automatically to the Tiff Tribute Awards). Or more specifically, the after party.
I picture Hayden saying hello to a couple of people he knows before heading to the bar and sticking around there, just sipping on his drink and greeting whoever comes along to shake his hand and pat his shoulder.
You already saw him back on the red carpet, making your best effort to not get your drooling face captured by a paparazzi. Your stunning dress and detailed makeup made you look like a million dollars !!!
And he noticed. Fuck, did he notice.
Walking by the bar, after pep talking yourself into talking to him for like half an hour, you pulled up right beside him to order yourself a drink. A cosmo or some shit like that. Very fancy and pretty, like you.
He was hypnotized by you the second he saw you up close. Actually, the second he saw your ass swinging his way.
That was it. You two were done for the moment your gazes crossed.
He made the first move, saying a polite "hey" and offering to call the bartender for you.
You were batting your eyelashes, grazing his biceps with your long nails and giving those "fuck me eyes" that worked every time. Someone so much more mature and wise, you didn't think he would want you for something besides fucking, so why did it matter if you were a bit sluttier than you were used to?
But you started talking and it was an actual good conversation. He seemed interested in getting to know you and his jokes actually made you laugh. He was all smooth with his compliments and subtle stares at your dress.
I feel like he would give you a nickname from the very first night. Something related to your attire or the sparkle of your eyes, accentuated by the glittery eye shadow.
It would be a downright shame to let that amazing chemistry go to waste for a meaningless hookup. Luckily he didn't let that happen.
Like a true gentleman, he walked you to your car, using the back door and called it a night. Not before asking for your number and teasing a goodnight kiss.
The next day, while you were getting ready to shoot a campaign, you receive a text from an unknown number, but you immediately knew who it was.
"Hey, starlight." There's a whole other version of this with them meeting over a smoke break, but I know that's not everyone's cup of tea.
BEFORE AND AFTER YOU:
Okay so let's set some things straight. Hayden's not a public guy. he hates having his private life printed on newspapers and he's not a fan of social media. At all. Heck. he doesn't even like to leave his house on weekends. But after you? He had to get used to it. You're this generation very own Gisele Bündchen. You're everywhere. You're everything. You are the fashion world. So paps are very much included in every moment of your life.
BEFORE GOING PUBLIC:
You tried to keep it hidden as much as you could. It was not very hard with you traveling almost every day and him living in LA, at his new house. And whenever he could, he escaped to his own little paradise in Canada.
So texting was basically everything you could do.
He even learned new lingo just to keep up with you :)
But you both craved more, so the next time you were in LA, you were going to grab dinner.
The damn paps got a few pictures of you and that's when the rumors started.
At first not many people recognized him, mainly because the pictures were taken from behind him, but the curls and the outfit ratted him out to a few observant fans.
But media didn't believe them, I mean, why? And the selected group that decided to run with that narrative used headliners like: "how the fuck did the awkward guy from SW pulled y/n's ass?"
After weeks of trying to be low-key for his sake: going on coffee runs using his caps and sunglasses so people wouldn't recognize you, having dinner dates at his house and/or choosing far away locations to stroll with a bit of privacy; you gave up. Your already public life was catching up with you two. So it was better to ride the wave than to escape it and fail in the process.
BUT BEFORE ABSOLUTELY GOING PUBLIC, I love the idea that interviewers were trying to drag the information out of you. Maybe at a red carpet or at an interview with a digital magazine, people would throw you some questions to see if you bite the bait:
"So, Y/n, who's your favorite SW character?"
And you would grin knowingly but never backing down. Your answer would vary from Obi-Wan Kenobi (to mess with Hayden) or R2 when you felt like sharing some of your SW passion.
But right before you two decide to go full-on public, you decide to mess with them, for your own entertainment: "You know, I do have a soft spot for Darth Vader."
PEOPLE GASPED AT THAT CRUMB OF CONFIRMATION.
GOING PUBLIC:
It was at a red carpet
You two went in separate cars
Hayden walked first, having his picture staken and signing autographs while you barely arrived at the event
The second you entered the carpet the cameras went off on you, total focus on getting pics of your designer dress
You were posing like an absolute goddess, answering some questions with wit, trying to spot your boyfriend with the corner of your eye
Finally you locked eyes and he raised a dubious eyebrow, like saying: "Are we seriously doing this?"
And you gave him a bright beam, stretching your arm to him as he walked to you, taking your hand and kissing the inner side of your forearm before placing it on his shoulder. Fingers dropping to your waist and pulling you to him while you laugh, his mouth lowering to your ear to whisper: "You always get your way, huh?"
You chuckled and kissed his cheek, you two turning to face the cameras, just for a few seconds before moving on.
DATING:
I'll not get into the heavy details of how you two managed to make your relationship work, with your traveling and photoshoots, because fuck that. I'll only say that there was a lot of sexting and he was a fucking natural at it. Mile high club as well.
You two would still try to remain unrecognizable by the paparazzis but more chill this time.
That meant having more pictures of you on your candle lit dinners or your fun Sunday mornings in the park out there.
I JUST KNOW THERE'S A PICTURE OF YOU KISSING IN THE PARK. YOU ON YOUR TIPPY TOES WHILE YOUR ARMS ARE AROUND HIS NECK. BIG GRIN ON YOUR FACES, LIKE IT WAS TAKEN SECONDS BEFORE YOUR LIPS MADE CONTACT.
The media would still release some mean headliners but thanks to the dilf culture cultivated in social media, some were actually rooting for you. Oh, and fans were torn between you; hating you because you were clearly fucking him and loving you because since your relationship started, you gave them more Hayden content.
The SW questions were constant in the interviews and talk shows, to the point that you were always brought some type of SW merch: a Grogu plush, a kids lightsaber, a little R2 replica. Whatever it was, it was always pulled whenever the question about you and Hayden was brought up.
You still kept answering "Obi-Wan" with a laugh and no additional information. "He has the high ground." You shrugged your shoulders, shaking your head with a cheeky smile.
Later in bed, when Hayden was giving you your daily dose of healthy cum :))) pounding into you with an admirable expertise, he whispers: "Who has the high ground now, baby?"
CLICHE BUT LET ME HAVE THIS
You never revealed to Hayden that he was your childhood crush, I mean, you could have mentioned it the first night but you didn't want to approach him like a fan. And then you didn't want to look psycho so you just let it be. And now it was too late.
But then
In the middle of an interview, a girl that actually gained your honest trust, asked you the anticipated question:
"How does it feel to date Anakin Skywalker?"
And... (the next bit was written by Indy during a brainstorm and I just wanted to share the exact words <3)
"in the interview you’re visibly nervous, rubbing on your knee, leaning forward, adopting a slackened posture. “yeah..” big grin, “he was actually my childhood crush.” “no!” the interviewer says in awe. “yeah! yeah,” you kinda laugh and cover your mouth. “i didn’t tell him. is that bad?” you put your nail in your teeth to fidget, putting on a little lovable twist to your face"
And then he sees the interview and he shots you an immediate text with the link like: "Oh???"
You know what you'll come home to
He's sitting on his usual chair, reading a book when he hears the door creak. You showed up with a shy smile, his arms opening up to let you crawl on his lap. Knowing that he'll bring it up, you hide on his neck, blush all over your cheeks. Hayden is caressing your thigh up and down, while he hugs you with his other arm and snorts: “did you keep that from me on purpose?” with a little swat on your ass (Indy, 2023).
THE REACTION OF PEOPLE ON SOCIAL MEDIA AFTER THE INTERVIEW. you cackle at the comments: "Not Y/n admitting she is dating her childhood crush!! She's one of us!!!" “HE WAS NOT” “bro no 😭 i thought she was single” “darth vader. you win again” (Indy, 2023).
Also dragging you to hockey games <333 you start to love the sport because of him but at first you didn't understand shit
He laughed at your reaction when you saw the first fight in the rink
"Do they just... start beating each other up and the ref let them?" You winced exaggeratedly.
"Yup." He laughs, drinking a sip of his beer.
KISS CAM KISS CAM KISS CAM
Also opening the car door for you after a date night, protecting you from the paps???? That's a head canon I'll take from starlet!reader and apply it here because YES YES YES
FASHION SHOWS AND SOCIAL MEDIA
ofc he goes to your fashion shows !!!!! front line baby !!!!!!!! And he is so fucking proud of his beautiful girlfriend.
So motherfucking supportive it hurts.
He comes home and peppers kisses all over your face, praising you for a job well done.
"I would buy all the clothes you sell, baby"
Or if you wore something he particularly liked, he would be desperate to get home and show you just how much he loved your teeny tiny dress on the runway.
He even learned how to dress appropriately to match with your outfits. NEVER LEAVING THE CAPS BEHIND OFC !! But his personal style improved so much, we are proud of him :)
ALSO whenever he is out and spots an ad of yours he takes a picture of it and sends it to you. Maybe with a little heart or smile, or a little text like: "so proud of you baby." Sometimes he takes a selfie with the campaign!!! such a dad selfie, his head tilted back and kind of blurry because he's trying to get the right angle !!!!
also social media with him !!!! again, he doesn't have any active accounts but you do. For his sake, you don't post a lot of things about him, however, some things are too adorable not to share. And fans love you for the little crumbs you give them
A list of photos I think would be posted on this reader's insta stories:
A photo of him in the garden, checking his tomatoes. I KNOW HE HAS TOMATOES
A photo of your shadows during a coffee run. Bonus points if it's Tim Horton's and it has the Canada location tag
A photo of his back while he's making breakfast
A photo of the view from his house. Bonus points if it is from the bathroom window. Extra points if it has any indicators that you two were previously fucking in there, like steamy doors.
A casual photo of you on his couch and you can see the famous chess game
a video of you two watching the prequels and you can hear yourself saying: "omg who's the handsome guy?" when he appears and he laughs.
A photo of you with one of his caps. Bonus points if it's the Toronto Maple Leafs one.
VS FASHION SHOW
OH YES. THE GOOD PART. THE FUN PART.
He never thought he would be in this position. Front line at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. But he is. And he's there to support his girlfriend. Heck, that still sounds funny to him-
You're out there, strutting your gorgeous figure for the world to see: with your six inch heels, your pretty wings and tiny lingerie- You're a fucking dream. His dream.
He's there at the front line with the Proud Boyfriend club, along with Adam Levine (I know but he got us fooled for half a decade) and Caleb from Kings of Leon.
His heart is pounding hard when your face appears in the initial video where they present all of the models walking
The first time you walk, he stands up, cheering loudly and smiling brightly at you. You were opening the show!!!!! how huge!!!
You focus on the cameras and getting the pose right but when you turn, walking on the side he's in, you point at him, even blow him a kiss.
The other two times you walk, because the initial pressure is off, you can focus more on him, and shoot him a playful wink and/or wave at him. He's grateful that you're giving him that attention, now he can brag around with hard evidence. :)
They dressed you up in a very flirty little piece, a pair of panties with a black bow on your rear side. When you get to the end of the runway, you turn around and show it off, maybe even playfully shake a little.
You know you'll pay for it back home
You will also pay for flirting with the music guest in the middle of the runway
I mean, you were not flirting, just doing the regular thing of pointing at them and dancing with them for mere seconds. But the music guest really focused on you and your strut. Maybe you did take advantage of the moment to get him all jealous and get some angry sex out of it
He could understand that part of your job. It didn't mean he liked it. He made sure to send some backhanded comments in the after party to make sure the musical guest got the picture. That you were taken.
It was so fucking hot.
He loved loved loved your police woman outfit, offering to pay for it himself so you could take it with you.
He was a fan of your angelic look with the enormous big, white wings. Almost drowning you in feathers but making you look like a real life angel. You were to him at least :)
You take such cute pictures on the pink carpet <3 he's looking like arm candy, an absolute accessory of yours. And he was happy to do it ! It was your night and he couldn't be any happier to be there with you !
Although the paps did catch him while he was staring at your spilling boobs. But could you blame him? That dress was TIGHT.
Hayden also has a photo of one of your VS campaigns in a giant frame in his office <3 you were so ashamed at first but you secretly loved that he paraded you around like that <33333333
you can catch glimpses of it during online interviews
LAST BIT
You are in a talk show, talking about the VSFS 2025, when the interviewer gets all serious and jumps:
"Last question, Y/n... is it true you and Hayden Christensen are engaged?"
You open your mouth in bewilderment, scoffing loudly.
"Where did you hear that?"
"Rumors are all over the place... but is it true?"
"No! Of course not." You squealed, acting offended before cracking a sly smirk. "We are married." And you show off the rock on your left hand.
PEOPLE GO WILD.
AHHHHHHHH- I could do this forever but I need to shut up :) also let me know if you want more nsfw content about this couple :)
Also some of these are stolen from my hockeyplayer!Anakin Skywalker / hockeyplayer!Hayden Christensen private headcanons. :)
Last pic because this is how I imagine this reader and Hayden backstage:
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thats-godscomma · 1 year ago
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Since rewatching Psych, I've been thinking about how weird and arbitrary Shawn's interests are. Sure, late 2000's writing had something to do with it, and maybe a bit of Henry and Gus's influence, but hearing Shawn be so vocal about how he hates certain popular things or (more importantly) refuses to give them a chance BUT at the same time knowing so many pop culture references, it got me thinking.
What if the reason Shawn has so many pop culture references on hand is because of his eidetic memory, and he doesn't actually have as much of an interest in pop culture? Throughout the show, he actively avoids getting roped into big interests and franchises (see: comic books, soap operas, etc.) despite the fact that he genuinely seems excited once he's part of it. In fact, we don't get to see a lot of Shawn's interests at all unless it's based on an idea.
Take being a bounty hunter, for example. According to him, he's obsessed with the idea, but he doesn't make many references to an actual bounty hunter show or franchise. Instead, he just remembers the one bounty hunter he saw as a child and maybe references a movie or two. Because once he remembers something, he's never going to forget it, or at least not for a very long time.
That's why he thinks in references. Everything is a reference if you have a good enough memory. Everything reminds you of something. If Shawn hears someone make a Spock reference, it's in his repertoire forever. But he wouldn't be caught dead watching the shows or movies because that's just too much information. Why on earth would he endure that?
Of course, it also intertwines with his ADHD. He has bouts of energy and trouble focusing. He can't sit still to save his life, and he hyperfixates...or he would if his memory didn't make him averse to it. So if he doesn't want to hyperfixate on an information-based interest, then what does he hyperfixate on? Physical activities. Instead of learning about his favorite daredevil, he tries to be one himself. When he learns about oil rigs, he doesn't get a book from the library. He tries to find oil in his backyard.
This is also where he and Henry differ regarding Shawn's "potential." Henry is correct when he talks about Shawn's "wasted" potential, but he doesn't understand the toil of having this eidetic memory and ADHD. Here's what I think happened: Henry probably noticed Shawn's stellar memory at a young age, realized he has a gift, spoke with his wife about her eidetic memory, learned that you need to challenge your child's eidetic memory at a young age or it'll go away, started the hat game to make it fun and exciting, but then Shawn's ADHD appeared. Suddenly, it made him much harder to raise (because let's be real, Shawn was not an easy child.) Henry didn't know what he was doing anymore, and since it was the 80's, he didn't have the resources to properly understand his kid's behavior, so he tried to find a common interest, and started training Shawn to be a detective "because kids love cop shows." But Shawn struggled to stay attached to one single interest, and when he grew up, he stopped trying to articulate his problems because his mom (the only person who remotely understood his struggles) left, and he blamed his dad for it.
And academics? Those are a joke because what is the point of studying if he already remembers everything? Until, of course, he needs to apply it to a problem-solving test or writing an essay. Suddenly, he's memorizing a math teacher's answer sheet and copying Gus's report.
Yes, Shawn could have been a great cop. He could be an amazing scientist or anything really. He could have been a national spelling bee champion like Gus wanted to be. Even 15 years later, Shawn remembered exactly what word Gus messed up, how to spell the word, and what letter he made Gus slip up, but he didn't want to be on that stage with Gus because that requires so much learning. And so much time. And so much memorizing. And he refuses to sit still for that long when he knows that overloading his head is going to give him migraines.
Also his "I've heard it both ways" probably comes from the fact that people with eidetic memory can still make lots of mistakes if they don't actively commit something to memory. If Shawn only overhears something, he'll still naturally try to fill in the gaps like everyone else, but because he's so confident in his memory, he just believes what he remembers to be true, leading him to repeat incorrect information with confidence. That could also be why some of his references are incorrect due to mixed-up homophones.
Anyway, this post was supposed to be about how Shawn is just a walking movie reference because his memory won't let him forget quotes, but then I fell into a rabbit hole of the negative effects of having an eidetic memory as a child, and I am very passionate about how Henry actually tried his best, and people need to stop calling him a horrible parent. Love y'all. Let me know what you think.
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seduzist · 4 months ago
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young and beautiful
chapter one.
pairing: natasha romanoff x reader
cw: age gap, smut, forbidden love, underage kissing and touching,underage drinking, just the first chapter so don’t expect much.
masterlist. chapter two.
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you didn´t even fully unpacked your bags before wanda calls you, asking you to come to her house as soon as humanly possible, which you happily did, running as fast as you could, seeing her by the garden waiting for you with open arms, you huggged her tightly and you both talked about how you missed each other.
when pietro comes out of her house, smiling, you hugged him too, only then realizing how the boy had grown since the last time you saw him, he looked taller and very much stronger, like he had worked out every day for a whole year, about to debut on a new teen superhero movie.
''damn, pietro...'' you touched his arms out of surprise and he smiled shyly with his cheeks red, after all he was still just a boy.
when you entered the house, following the siblings, you found it just as you remembered, wanda took your hand, leading you to the kitchen to see her mother, who smiles brightly and told you to take a sit, that lunch was almost ready.
''hi, y/n.'' her aunt, natasha, caught your attention with her sultry voice.
natasha had been your first platonic love, you didn’t even knew what you felt, but her presence intrigued and intimidated you, when you realized that what you felt was a crush, on a woman, many things changed, but you presumed that was on the past, you weren’t a little girl anymore, blushing when your best friend’s aunt gave you any sort of attention, no, you were almost an adult and knew that she was way too old and out of reach to you.
but knowing those things didn’t stop your cheeks for reddening up and your voice of becoming shy, noticing her hair grew a few inches longer and now she had some locks died white, she looked even prettier that you remembered, using her characteristic braids.
“hi, n-nat…” oh god i really had to stutter? you thought, but that was unnoticed by everyone and natasha just gave you a warm smile.
you spend the rest of your day telling wanda about the news in your life and listening about hers, by night, you watched “the notebook” in her laptop just like the old times.
when the movie ended and you wiped your tears, you noticed wanda was already dead asleep, so you adjusted her body better on the bed and closed her laptop, getting ready to leave and go to your grandma’s. you could spend the night there but pietro always snores in the next room and interrupts your sleep, you’ve learned this a lot of summers ago. you smile at the thought of being so intimate with them, feeling lucky for having this kind of relationship in your life, they’re like family to you.
when you were passing through her garden, you saw natasha on a sun lounger, glass of wine in her hand while she notices you, you heart beats faster with her look, maybe you were still a kid after all.
“hey, y/n/n, you’re going?” you approached her, giving slow steps, unsure if you should gave her the explanation or just wave goodbye.
“yes, i would stay but… pietro snores.” you said nervously and she laughed, shaking her head yes.
“he does… you wanna join me?” she offers the glass to you, and you smell the fine wine.
“i’m seventeen…”
“oh, it’s fine, you’re not a small town girl, i bet you drink with your friends in your city all of the time, right? i won’t tell if you don’t.” you pondered for a second, that wasn’t a lie, you’ve drunk a lot of times before, and you had to be out of your mind to deny some alone time with the woman of your dreams, so you sat next to her, accepting the wine and taking a sip.
after that, you didn’t even could remember what did you guys talked about, maybe it was about how pretty the moon was that night, maybe it was about the fine wine you were drinking that tasted just like every other wine but natasha insisted that was better, maybe it was your friendship with wanda and pietro but, you spent the next 40minutes drinking and talking with her, and adult talk, no bullshits like how’s school going came out of her mouth, and you felt for a second or two that you had a chance with her.
when natasha drove you home - which she insisted - you were drunk and messy, but she was still sober and talking to you the whole time.
“you know pietro likes you, right?” she asked, just a few seconds after parking.
you looked at her like she was crazy, pietro was like your little brother.
“what? no! no way, he’s like a brother to me.” your voice was a little altered but you didn’t even notice, the alcohol in your brain couldn’t let you.
“he does, he worked out the entire year just to impress you…” this caught you completely off guard and you needed a moment to process this, which must have lasted a few minutes because natasha cuts off the silence. “do you like him? or… you have a boyfriend in your city?” there was something different in her voice, a different type of interest.
“i don’t have anyone.” you answered, looking into her eyes and watching a smile form into her lips, suddenly, a wave of courage came into you. “i.. i like someone, actually.”
“yeah? who?”
“uhm… it’s dumb, they’re older and probably thinks i’m just a stupid kiddo.” you were still with your eyes locked in hers, and by the time you both knew what’s the subject.
“maybe you have to tell them, so you’ll know how they feel about you.” natasha was having way too much fun at this flirt little game with her niece’s friend, it made her feel like a teenager again, and god, she missed this.
at this point you weren’t thinking about your perfect friendship with wanda or about natasha’s age, you couldn’t even mind if you looked stupid and pathetic for her, you were just too focused and involved to even care.
“how do you feel about me, natasha?” her name rolled off your tongue so softly, and in seconds she was mesmerized, the confident drunk girl that was in front of her, with your glassy eyes looking up and your dress - that was already short - hiked up your thighs, barely covering anything, couldn’t be the little girl she saw playing with her niece in the lake a few years ago, no, you weren’t a girl anymore, you were a woman - she told herself.
“i feel like i really want to kiss you… but i won’t, unless you ask me to.” her lowly voice sounded like angels sound to you, and without a second thought you took impulse with your body, getting up in the car and then passing your leg through her thighs, suddenly straddling her lap with your faces so close that you could feel her breath heavy on your cheek. “god…”
that’s all natasha managed to say before you lock your lips in hers, sharing the taste of the wine, letting your tongue explore her mouth, too focused on the feeling to even realize that this moment was really happening.
her warm hands caressed your thighs, going up to your waist, and when she bit your lip you almost rode her thigh involuntarily, but you didn’t, instead, you just touched every part of her that your hands could reach, her hands, her arms, her shoulders, her neck, her hair, it was like you just needed to touch her, and you felt she thought the same about you, when her hand reached under your dress.
“natasha…” you pulled out of the kiss, breathless and nervous, but not regretful. “i’ve never done that.” you smiled, thinking she would be happy to be your first.
“with a woman? or… with anyone?” when you confirmed to her you were a virgin, suddenly she sounded guilty and her hand got back at your thigh. “i can’t do it… you’re drunk… i’m sorry.”
she kept saying about how this was wrong and how she could never make a special girl like you losing your virginity like this, it made you sad because you wanted to, but you also thought about how gentle and respectful she was.
but you begged her to do something, anything, to relieve your feeling down there, needing her, anything more than just a kiss, just to keep touching you. your pleads sounded so needy, your doe eyes, impossible to resist, you innocence and yet your desperation made you look so cute to her eyes, and in a second her hand found the hem of your dress, pulling it down, revealing your breasts.
that was the moment you saw her eyes brightened as she stares at your chest hungrily, whispering how beautiful you were before closing her mouth around of your nipples. you tugged her hair, surprised by how sensitive you were, your hips rolled on her thigh, creating a friction at your clit, wasn’t the ideal, but felt good.
“you taste so good, i can’t believe i’m doing this with you.” she said, muffled by your skin. she couldn’t believe it? you couldn’t believe it! that was the most impossible thing you could think of, that was like imagining your life if everything was different, this was like daydreaming at a boring class, that wasn’t the type of thing that happens in reality, but it did.
you entered home with your panties dripping that night, with your sandals in your left hand and with your mind on what happened, knowing that your whole life would change forever the next day, because something that doesn’t happen, happened to you.
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wherewritersgotodie-blog · 8 months ago
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Superstitious (Kai Anderson x reader)
“swear on your life you don’t want me.”
warnings: smut. penetration w/o protection. dom!kai. oral (reader receiving). light degradation & taunting. bdsm themes. kinky. idk what else prob smth
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You were Winter’s best friend since middle school. Two girls who grew up to have the same values, the same beliefs, and a lot of love for each other. She took care of you, you took care of her.
Every Saturday, you went over to her house for dinner. Sometimes you’d go out to parties, some nights you’d stay in and watch a movie.
So, as always, you knock on Winter’s door at 6pm on Saturday evening with a bag of take-out hanging from your left arm. You waited at the door, almost going to knock again, just before the door swung open, her asshole brother Kai, not Winter, standing at the door. “Hm. My favorite little brat. What can I do for you?” He cocked his head to the side, leaning his arm against the door.
“Uh… I’m looking for Winter?” You say, sliding sideways passed him, underneath his arm.
“She didn’t text you?” he asked.
“No, why?”
“She’s gonna be out tonight. She went to campaign. I thought you were going with her!”
“Oh, fuck!” you say, “I totally forgot. I’m such a flake.”
“It’s fine. She’s good on her own.”
“And she called me this morning. Damn. Whatever, I’m going next weekend. It’s fine,” you say, mostly to yourself. Then you turn and reach out to open the door.
“Hey, wait!” he called out, “You’re taking the food?”
“What, you want it?” you asked, raising your eyebrows, holding out the bag.
“Are you kidding?” he said, taking the bag from your hand and placing it on the table.
“Alright, see ya,” you wave dismissively.
“Bye, slut,” he responded, sitting down at the table.
You get in your car and turn the keys. The car stalls. Shit. You turn the keys again. The engine sputters.
You walk back into the house, your keys swinging around your finger. Kai is lifting weights in the living room when you get back in. He stops to turn and look at you. Those muscles. “Hey, big guy, any idea how to fix an old Honda?”
“Yeah. Get a fuckin’ new car,” he laughs to himself.
“Kai, seriously,” you say with a whiny tone, pouting.
He caves, exhaling. “Fine. You owe me.”
He saunters out to the car, popping the hood. He looks at it for a few minutes. “Well, I could fix it, but my box is in my car. Winter has it,” he says, leaning on the front of the car, crossing his arms.
“Shit,” You say.
“You can wait here ‘til she gets back,” he smirks.
“Uhm, I think I’ll walk home,” You say, looking him up and down, “Thanks…”
“Walk home? Across town? Alright,” he says, slamming the hood shut then walking back toward the house.
You looking down the street, the wind hitting your face, freezing cold. “Ugh,” you say, then run up behind Kai. He holds the door open for you.
“Attagirl,” he says, smirking.
“Whatever.”
“Don’t be a bitch or I’ll make you walk home.”
“You wouldn’t,” you say, smirking, leaning against the doorway.
“I would,” he says, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I totally would.”
You walk to the sink. He watches you bend over the counter slightly and reach up on your tippy toes. “Why are your glasses all the way up on that shelf?” You say, frustrated.
He walks up behind you, grabbing a glass. He then raises his hand to hold up the glass out of your reach. You look at him in frustration. “Come get it,” he smirks.
“Kai, stop,” you say.
“Come get it or I’m not giving it to you.”
“Ugh!” you say, then try to reach up to grab the glass. He lowers it, then pulls it away. You reach up again. “Please?” you ask.
“There we go,” he says, handing you the glass. “Was that so hard?”
“You are a huge dick,” you say, filling up the glass.
“You wanna know about my huge dick?” he whispers in your ear from behind you.
You cringe, scrunching your nose, “Ugh! Gross.” You turn around, taking a sip from your glass.
“Right,” he smirks. He looks down at you, cornering you into the counter, slowly, so you almost don’t notice it. “So you don’t ever think about me?”
“What?” you say, turning red, putting the glass down.
“You don’t think about me fucking you? Ever? You’ve never thought about it once?” he says, leaning his arm on the cabinet.
“I- No! No, I haven’t,” you affirm.
“Really? Swear on your life?” he smirks.
“What?”
“Do you swear on your life you’ve never thought about me fucking you?”
“That’s not fair. You know I’m superstitious about that. I don’t know everything I’ve ever thought!” you retort.
“Fine. Swear on your life you don’t want me. Swear on your life in the past week you haven’t thought about me fucking you and liked it?”
“I,” you pause, panicking. “Fuck this! I’m not doing this with you.”
“I knew it!” he smirks, “I knew you had a crush on me,” he says victoriously, backing away from you completely.
“Oh, you are such an asshole!” you shout, embarrassed.
“And you like it, that’s the fucked up part,” he says.
“Stop,” you glare at him, blushing a deep red, “Seriously.”
He walks up to you again, pressing your back against the counter, putting one hand on the back of your neck, one on your waist. Your breath hitches. Your chest heaves. You blush, looking up at him, eyes flickering all across his face.
“Right,” he smirks, nodding like he had just proven what he knew all along. “Swear on your life you aren’t wet as fuck right now.”
He’s a fucking sadist.
“Kai, please,” you say breathlessly.
“Do it. Do it or I’ll find out myself,” he whispers in your ear.
You feel like you’re drowning, your breath is so heavy. He is relentless.
He waits a moment, smirking at your silence. He then puts his hand down your leggings, over your underwear. When he feels a large pool of wetness through the lacy fabric, he closes his eyes for a moment. “Fuck,” he whispers.
He pulls his hand back up, making sure to brush his fingers over your clit long enough that you ache when he puts his hand back around your waist, pulling you against him.
“How long have you had a crush on me?” he says, looking you in your eyes.
“I don’t know,” you breathe.
“Nah, you do. Tell me,” he said quickly, confidently, the words almost stringing together into one word.
“I don’t know, a couple years,” you mumble.
“A couple years?” he laughs. He slides his hand down over your leggings between your legs again, “Shit, you must like this then.” He rubs you, sliding his hand roughly, even possessively, farther down and up, his middle finger in line with your clit.
You moan, leaning your head against his chest. “Yeah… Yeah, you do,” he says in a mocking tone. You can hear his malevolent smirk. “You like it a lot.”
He uses his other hand to wrap around where your jaw meets your neck, forcing your face up to look at him. “So you do want my huge dick?”
You stare at him, biting your lip. Were you really about to fuck your best friend’s brother? Really? Seriously? No. You should say no. You’re gonna say no.
“Yes.” Shit.
He picks you up, wrapping your legs around his hips, holding you by the back of your head, stroking your hair, and around your waist. You lean your head over his shoulder. He carries you to his room.
He throws you onto his bed.
“You’re a fuckin’ slut,” he smirks, leaning down to kiss you, positioned between your legs.
“Not usually,” you deny mindlessly.
He grabs your breasts through your shirt, letting out a low growl. “So you’re just my slut, then?”
You look up at him. “I didn’t say that.”
He then pulls your one leg farther towards him so you’re forced on your side, then he smacks your ass hard through your leggings. You gasp, then blush.
He raises his hand again, smirks and brings it down harder than the first time. You whimper. He rears his hand up one more time, then stutters, searching for your anticipation. He sees your expression carved into your profile. Were you… smiling?
He was rock solid now.
“Shit, you like that?” he laughs. “Anybody ever do that to you before?” he pushes you again onto your back.
“Uh-uh,” you respond.
“Yeah… you are my little slut,” he affirms. Then, he kisses you deeply, holding you by the back of the neck, his other hand wandering down your body, squeezing periodically.
You lean up suddenly, so he offers no resistance. You put your hands up his shirt, pulling it up. He leans down to allow you to pull it over his head. You through it onto the floor.
Everything accelerates viciously after this one move.
He pulls off your shirt, throwing it to the floor. You begin to unbuckle his belt, and he attempts to pull off your pants. It’s chaotic; your hands are clashing, you’re getting in each others’ way.
It becomes, to Kai, at least, a race to see who can get the other bare faster.
Obviously, Kai wins. He pushes your hands to the side many times, pulling your leggings over your legs, unclasping your bra with his one hand (concerning, but you ignore it), throwing it to the floor. Then, he leans down to your hip bones and he pulls your underwear off with his teeth.
You haven’t even finished unbuckling his pants.
He throws your body so your head is against his pillows. He crawls up to you, leaning over you, necklace hanging in your face.
He’s a fucking animal.
Just like you imagined.
He kisses you harshly, nearly biting you. Then, he kneels, legs tucked under themselves, widely spread. He pulls your body up, wrapping you around his waist again. He is holding onto your entire body like his life depends on it, kissing down your neck, sucking on your collar bone. You are scratching at his back, head tilted to the bed, eyes closed.
He throws you back down again, then puts his head between your thighs.
“So easy to toss around,” he talks against you.
He begins working on you with his tongue. You wrap your fingertips in his hair, tugging at it, pressing his face farther into you.
He takes only a few moments of this before he comes back so his face is in line with yours. He grabs your wrists and presses them together above your head. He squeezes them hard for emphasis.
“Don’t move them,” he whispers. You know he’s serious.
He leans back down, continuing to you work you with his tongue. He wraps his arms around the highest place of your thigh, pulling you down into his face.
Your back arches and he chuckles against you. The vibration shakes to your core.
It hits you all at once and you unravel beneath his mouth. It’s so intense you convince yourself you’ve died for a moment.
He leans himself back up to hover over you, wiping his mouth with his hand.
You stare up at him in admiration. He does not miss this. You keep your hands above your head.
He pulls his belt off, laying it next to both of you. Then, he pulls his pants down, along with his boxers, all in one smooth movement.
Fuck. He wasn’t kidding.
What were you even supposed to do with it? Surely all of him wouldn’t even fit inside you.
He smirked as he saw your train of thought reflected on your face.
In one swift motion, he flipped you over so you were on top of him, hovering over his thighs.
He leaned up, grabbing your wrists, putting them together behind your back.
He held them together with his one hand, grabbing his belt with the other. Then, with a few moments and his two hands behind your back, looking into your eyes, he tied your wrists together. You struggled against the leather, but the crafty contraption was totally foolproof.
Then, he grabbed your hips, leaning back to rest his back on the two pillows stacked against his headboard.
“You okay?” he asked with a genuine smile, putting his hand on your arm.
“Very,” you nod.
“Good,” he said, and that was all he needed. He put his hand back on your hip, lifting your body up so you were hovering over his length. “Breathe,” he commanded.
You took a deep breath and he sunk himself into slowly, pulling you down onto him. You dropped your head back, letting a moan escape.
He groaned, also leaning his head back, “Holy shit,” he dragged out the words. “Holy shit. Fuck.”
His grip loosened on your hips as he was fully submerged in you. “Woah,” he whispered. You smiled at the commentary.
He kept his hand on you, pushing you back and forth. You worked on him, rolling your hips and pushing yourself up and down on top of him.
You moaned out as he thrusted himself up into you slightly. It had to be at least eight, you thought.
You both move against each other with an intense rhythm, your hands behind your back, his traveling all across your upper half.
He watches you intently, his mind worshipping the sight of all of you on top of him like this, eyes gliding down your hips, over your stomach, your face as you bit your lip and closed your eyes in ecstasy. He groans deeply, almost growling, digging his fingertips into your hips.
He pushes himself forward so he’s sitting, his one hand behind his back, propping himself up.
You rest your forehead on his shoulder and he wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you back and forth against himself, the entire warmth whole bodies in full contact.
“Fuck, Kai!” you moan.
“Yeah, baby?” he smirks, his forehead coated in sweat.
You feel that you’re going to finish again, and he feels that he will, too. You pull away, looking into his eyes. He looks back into yours.
Then, you rest your forehead on his. The knot in your stomach is wound so tight you can barely breathe.
His chest is heaving, which is saying a lot, considering his fitness.
“Oh, fuck,” you moan against his mouth. He nods.
You both release at the same time, him grasping onto your body, you moaning into his ear, him groaning against your neck.
When he finishes inside of you, you both pull away. He laughs, and you do, too. He undoes the belt behind your back.
You pull away from him, laying beside him.
He lays on his back for a moment, then turns on his side, propping his head on his hand, tracing his fingertips down the center of your stomach.
“My slut,” he whispers. You turn to him, pushing his shoulder playfully.
Then, he kisses you, smiling into your mouth.
When he pulls away, he looks at you, then smirks. You watch him, smiling, slightly confused. He pushes himself up from the bed, then leans down to look underneath it.
“Oh, shoot,” he says.
You cock your head to the side, “What?”
“Toolbox was here all along,” he smirks, putting his hands on his hips.
if you liked this pls tell me i love validation. also i will take requests asf
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Text
My Heart is Yours
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Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader
Words: 6.3k
Warnings: extreme fluff, maybe a tiny bit of angst? tension? this is just very fluffy because he needs it
Synopsis: It's Simon's birthday and somethings changed between you two...
Link to The Roommate Series Masterlist
You are currently reading part 2 of “The Roommate Series”
You were up earlier than normal two days in a row but this time you had woken up on your own. Usually on the weekends you slept in, enjoying the fact that you didn't have to go to class or do work, dozing in and out of sleep as you listened to your roommate go through his morning before you joined him. However, this weekend was different than most and it was hard for you to want to stay in bed.
For one, Simon was home. You have gone through many weekends without him, so when he was here it was hard for you to justify staying in bed when you wanted to spend time with him. You learned very quickly that you could never take the time spent with him for granted, not when he might be called back into work randomly and then you’d be left alone again. 
Truthfully it was a double edge sword. The more time you spent with him the harder it was to watch him leave but that was the price to pay when you let yourself get attached to a man who disappeared for months.
Another reason was because it was Simon’s birthday.
You were honestly more excited about it than he was. To him, his birthday was just another day but to you it was a day to make things right, to make things better from the vague stories he gave you about the way he grew up.
It was also a chance to have fun with him and to just relax. You didn’t pass up on those opportunities.
You had plans for dinner before you both got drunk off whiskey and any other alcohol you had in your fridge to watch movies. You also still had to make him a cake but more importantly you still had to wrap the gift you had gotten him.
The door to your room was closed but you still glanced at it as if Simon would appear out of thin air before you pulled his gift out from underneath your bed. 
In your hand was a travel sized joke book, one that had the really bad puns and dad jokes in it but it was the only thing that you could think of to get him that he would actually use. Even if you knew a lot about your roommate, he was difficult to shop for because he had everything he already needed and never thought about what he wanted.
“Just tell me something to get you!” You begged as you both walked through the aisles of the grocery store yesterday.
“I don’t want anything.” He shrugged and you huffed. 
“If you don’t tell me I’m going to get you something you won’t like.”
“I’m sure I’ll live.”
Simon would never tell you but it really didn't matter what you got him for his birthday. He would like whatever you got him because if it was something from you he’d cherish it until he died.
You opened the front of the book to make sure the birthday card you got him was still in there before you heard Simon walk past your room. You somehow had woken up before him and you listened to him shut the door to the bathroom before you let out a short breath.
You put the book back underneath your bed and got dressed. You tried to curb your excitement and instead worked through your head to come up with a plan to get him out of the apartment.
Even though he knew what you had planned you still wanted to act as if it was a surprise.
You left your room once you were dressed and made your way to the bathroom, noting that the door was cracked open for you. It was part of the routine you both had set up when he was home and happened to be in the bathroom when you had to get ready for class.
“Happy birthday!” You swung the door open and stood in the doorway with a grin.
Simon was brushing his teeth but gave you a grunt that sounded like a ‘thank you’. He seemed to have just woken up; his blond hair was tousled from sleep and he stared at you with bleary eyes. He was also still in his pajamas which consisted of just sweatpants since the man was practically a space heater and couldn’t wear a shirt to sleep. 
His entire upper body was covered in scars that you were sure had stories to them. It was uncommon for you to see them but sometimes you got a glimpse which struck something deep within your chest. However, right now you were just happy that he truly didn’t have any new scars. 
There was something strangely domestic about the sight of him brushing his teeth while you stood watching him. It felt like something that was meant to be, something that was natural to the apartment and to you both. It warmed your chest, softening the grin as it settled into you again that he was truly back home.
“I see you slept well.” You said and he didn’t have the heart to disagree. “Feel any older?”
“Pass.” He grumbled after he spit into the sink and washed out the fluoride with water.
You giggled and watched him begin to wash his face, unbothered by your presence. You were still running through ideas in your head about how to get rid of him for a few hours before you decided to play the safe route.
“What’re your plans today?” You wondered, trying to not sound suspicious.
“Get drunk and watch movies.” He reminded you and you hummed in response.
“You mean you don’t have anything else planned?”
He turned the water off and patted his face dry with a towel, turning to you with a suspicious look in his eyes when he was finished. It only worsened when you gave him a smile and he let out a long sigh from his chest. 
“You want me out of the flat.” He stated and you decided that it was time to be truthful.
“Just for a few hours.” You gave him a sheepish smile when he sent you an annoyed look. “It’d do you good to go out.”
“I went out yesterday.”
A soft huff left your mouth as you watched him hang the towel back up and he raised his eyebrows expectantly. You knew that it would’ve been hard to get him out the apartment, he was a homebody who practically confined himself to four walls when he was home. It never bothered you but right now you wished he at least had the motivation to go outside.
“You could go visit your friends?” You suggested even though in your entire time living with him you’d never seen or heard about him having any.
“No.” He didn’t hesitate and you sent him a look.
“At least think about it, geez.”
Simon smiled, it was small but it brightened your mood immensely, as he ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to tame it. It had gotten longer since he was gone, the longest you had seen it, and he pulled on a few of the strands to test the length. He didn’t look bad with it that long in your opinion but you assumed by the way he was staring at it through the mirror with intense concentration that he wanted it to be a shorter length. 
“I can pay for your haircut.”
“I prefer cutting my own hair.”
You groaned from his difficultness, not annoyed but you had hoped this would go easier. You weren’t sure if he was doing it on purpose to toy with you or if he genuinely didn’t want to leave the apartment. In hindsight, you couldn’t really blame him since he had gotten back yesterday and most likely just wanted to sit around and enjoy not having to be at his job.
Simon made his way over to you and leaned against the doorframe, his tired eyes staring down at you with confusion as he crossed his arms. Up this close, it was really hard to deny just how big he was and it took everything in you to not stare super long at him.
He seemed to have gained more muscle since you had last seen him and yet he hadn’t thinned down much either. Whatever he did for his job made him physically fit and you wondered if that was the reason why he always ate so much.
Not that you were complaining.
His eyes softened as you made eye contact and they bounced around your face as he leaned forward ever so slightly, making it so there was only a few inches between the two of you.
You were prepared for him to stare at you for a long time before he spoke.
“Why do you want to surprise me if I know what you’re doing?” He wondered and continued to stare at you as if he could read your mind.
“You don’t know everything.” You teased and his eyebrows knitted together. “Like the gift I got you.”
Simon’s eyes widened slightly and he stood up, causing you to bite back a few giggles. He tried to hide his excitement but you could see it in the way his eyes had brightened and his usual serious face had gotten happier just at the mention of a gift. 
It was cute, you couldn’t help but look at him with a warm chest as it was almost like looking at a kid who was just told they’d get ice cream.
“You got me something?” He sounded surprised it made you smile more.
“Mhm.” You nodded and he seemingly held his breath in anticipation. “But you’re not allowed to have it until after we have cake.”
You watched him deflate with slight disappointment before his eyes shot over to your room. You immediately knew what he was thinking about and you sent him a warning look that you hoped would deter him from even daring to search through your room for his gift.
Even if the dinner and the cake wasn’t a surprise, you wanted to keep his present a secret because you were honestly a little worried it wasn’t good enough and you still wanted to have the time to be able to potentially get something different for him.
“Okay, let’s compromise.” You said, trying to get him to forget about the gift, and continued when he looked back at you. “After lunch you leave while I make the cake and then you can come back once I start making dinner.”
Simon thought it over for a moment before he nodded. 
“I’ll help you make dinner.” He added but you shook your head.
“You’re not supposed to help, it’s your birthday.”
“It’s my birthday so I get to do what I want.”
You gasped and stared at him with shock, watching as a triumphant smile stretched across his face. Of course he would figure out a way to use your own arbitrary rules against you for his benefit. You were honestly surprised he hadn’t thought to do it earlier but maybe he was waiting for the right opportunity to catch you off guard.
He was smart, too smart to fall for you silly rules and play along with you.
You pursed your lips together as he looked down at you. You pretended to be offended, giving him a fake glare that couldn’t even be mistaken for anger as you fought back a smile.
“Oh, you think you’re so clever.” You poked him on the chest and watched him tense up slightly before he leaned more into your space.
“I do.”
You scoffed, shaking your head slightly as you placed your hands on your hips. You narrowed your eyes at him, watching as amusement twinkled in his eyes. You focused hard on them, knowing that if you didn’t you would be too enticed by the fact that you could smell the fresh mint on his breath that made you dare to think about what it would be like to press a kiss to his lips in this moment. How you could easily take his face into your hands and run your fingers across the blond stubble on his cheeks, tracing every scar that peppered his otherwise clear skin. 
Instead you looked into his dark brown eyes, finding that you were practically swallowed up in the color of bitter coffee and earth. A void of hidden emotions and an exhaustion that seemed to always plague him yet there was comfort within them expanse of darkness. There was warmth that blanketed you as you stared into his eyes, a sense of safety and stability that you couldn’t find anywhere else, only within the confines of the man who stood in front of you.
It was almost too much, too intense to be looking into his eyes like this. Normally you couldn’t do it for longer than a few seconds but doing so now made you feel almost dizzy, like he was taking the air from your lungs for himself.
And yet couldn’t get enough of him. He could be melded inside of you, his entire soul could be mixed with yours and it still wouldn’t be enough.
“Fine.” You cleared your throat when you noticed that your voice was shaking slightly. “You can help but just remind yourself that it’s your birthday.”
“Fine.” He playfully rolled his eyes before he gently pushed you back. “Go. I need to take a shower.”
“You brush your teeth before a shower? Weirdo.”
Simon sent you a look, still with the hint of playfulness, before he shut the door and it was as if you could breathe again. You stared at the door, taking in the moment you just had with him before the shower turning on shook you out of your thoughts.
You glanced at the door one more time before you moved towards the kitchen to make some breakfast.
~
Shooting whiskey has never been easy for you. The brown liquid burned your throat and settled in your chest long enough to give you an unpleasant shiver throughout your entire body. It was hard to keep back the water in your eyes and the cough as you downed a shot, chasing that funny feeling that made the world spin and everything a lot less stressful.
You had your own drink but you couldn’t deny Simon when he offered the last three shots of whiskey to you, finding that he could be persuasive when he wanted to be.
Both of you sat on the couch in front of the tv, some kind of movie that Simon hadn’t seen was playing in the background but it had been quickly abandoned after the last few shots. Instead of watching, both of you were preoccupied with each other, talking about everything that you could. 
Well, you were doing most of the talking in between shots and sips of a mixed drink while Simon listened. He sipped on his second glass of whiskey but would occasionally join you for a shot when he felt like he was behind you with how drunk you already were.
He wasn’t sure if it was because he was taking it slow and you weren’t or because he was a heavy drinker, but he definitely knew you were having more fun during his birthday than he was. He was too focused on you to really care anyway. You took up the room, demanding his attention and he happily gave it to you without hesitation or protest.
You took another shot, your vision of the world already spinning but you were having too much fun to really notice, and shivered once more. The effects of the alcohol weren't enough to take the bitter taste away just yet.
A smile pulled at the corner of Simon’s lips and he scoffed, getting your attention as you sent him a look through watery eyes.
“Lightweight.” He teased as he took another sip, completely unbothered.
“Shut up, you’re not even drunk.” You slurred and set the shot glass down on the coffee table. “You’re like a mountain.”
“I’m drunk.”
You gave him a suspicious look, one that was over exaggerated due to how drunk you were but it made him smile more nonetheless. 
That should’ve been enough for you to know that he was drunk, since he didn’t give out big cheesy smiles like you did. His cheeks were dusted pink and his tired eyes hungry just a little bit heavier, a haze over them as he stared at you with a dopey look as if he couldn’t quite understand what you were saying but he hung onto every word. He looked content, there wasn’t an ounce of stress left even in his usual tense shoulders as his body subconsciously leaned towards yours, almost as if he was hovering over you.
You were sure you looked just as drunk as he did, if not more, and yet he looked at you with bright eyes that bounced around your face often.
“You are!” You laughed and he attempted to hide the smile behind his hand. “Can’t hold your liquor that good.”
“Better than you.” He took another sip and you playfully cussed him out.
You ran a hand over your face and glanced around the room, noting that it had gotten dark outside. Your eyebrows knitted together and you wondered how long it had been since you both sat down after dinner to watch movies, thinking that only an hour or two had passed until you checked the time on your phone.
“Shit! We haven’t done cake yet.” You exclaimed when you saw that it was close to midnight.
“So?” Simon raised an eyebrow as you shot up from your spot on the couch.
“You have to have cake on your birthday.”
You tried your best to not stumble into the kitchen, failing at doing so but thankfully you didn’t fall flat on your face. You were extra careful when getting the cake out of the fridge despite the fact that you were in a rush, making sure that when you placed it on the counter to put the candles on, nothing was in the way. 
It was a small cake since you knew that Simon probably would only eat a few slices from it over the week before he was over the sweetness. On top of the icing, almost perfectly written since you were adamant to make it look pretty even though you knew he wouldn’t care, were the words “Happy Birthday Simon”. You placed a few candles around the words, making sure they wouldn’t touch the letters before you carried it into the living room.
You were focused on keeping the cake balanced, not noticing the way Simon’s eyes had softened greatly when you walked into the room and set it in front of him.
“I need your lighter.” You opened your palm urgently.
“You’re gonna burn yourself.” Simon protested with a serious look on his face but you waved him off.
“I won’t! Hurry before it turns midnight.”
Simon hesitantly dug his lighter out of his pocket and handed it to you, watching you intently as you lit the candles, making sure that if you burned yourself he would quickly get you to a sink. However you handed him back the lighter without harming yourself and positioned the cake in front of him properly.
You sat down beside him, your knees touching as you looked between him and the cake. A giddy feeling sprung up in your stomach and you wiggled in your spot excitedly watching Simon’s reaction carefully with clasped hands.
He stared down at the cake with soft eyes, the light from the small flames reflecting in them. They weren’t sad, but you noticed that there was a hint of something more melancholic hidden within his eyes that wasn’t there before until he read the writing. He pulled his hands into his lap almost as if he wasn’t sure what he should do before he hesitantly glanced your way.
You gave him a warm smile, one that signified that whatever he was thinking or feeling was okay, hoping that you didn’t go too far.
“Happy birthday, Simon.” You said softly and scooted close enough that now your thighs were touching.
Simon didn’t say anything but he continued to stare at you, eyes a range of emotion as they bounced around your face, stopping for a moment to look at your lips, until you gestured towards the cake.
“Make a wish.”
He rolled his eyes, a soft huff of amusement leaving his nose before he turned towards the cake and blew out the candles. A small smile pulled at his lips when you cheered and he watched as you stood up from the couch a lot more gracefully this time.
“Want a piece or do I have to eat this all on my own?” You teased and he nodded.
“Not a big one.”
You got plates and quickly cut a small piece out for him and for you. You waited for him to take a bite of it first, almost holding your breath as if this was the very moment that would break your entire ego about your baking skills.
Simon took a small bite of the cake and his eyes shut immediately.
“Fucking hell…” He muttered and your stomach sunk.
“What? Is it bad?” You asked him urgently as you gripped your plate so tight your fingers went sore.
“It’s good, really fucking good what did you put in this?”
Your eyes widened slightly and you felt your chest warm as you watched him eat the piece on his plate faster. You were sure if it was the alcohol making him like the sweetness but as soon as he finished the piece he had he went for another one. 
You smiled to yourself, taking a bit out of the cake on your plate. You hummed at the amazing flavors and felt proud of yourself as you eyed Simon.
“My undying desire to celebrate your birthday.”
“Piss off.”
You laughed, leaning into him enough to where you could hear him chuckle under his breath. The giddy feeling inside of you grew and you didn’t dare ignore it as you found yourself enjoying the closeness that you so rarely got with Simon, pushing yourself into his arm just a little more as you finished your piece of the cake.
Your chest warmed more when he leaned against you as if he liked the contact as well and your head fell to his shoulder, a content sigh leaving your chest as you reveled in his warmth. You noticed that he seemed to have gotten hot due to the alcohol and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, causing your eyes to jump down to the tattoo on his arm.
It was rare that you saw it since he often wore long sleeves and when he didn’t you never got a good look at it. You assumed that he didn’t want you to see it since every time you asked or he noticed you were staring at it, he would cover it up. Now, with the way you were sitting against him, he couldn’t see that you were staring at the ink unless he turned to look at you.
His tattoo was a lot more intricate than you had first thought, especially now as your eyes traced over the details in the ink designs. You knew he had a thing for skulls, since the mask he wore around you was the lower jaw of one, so it didn’t surprise you when you saw the skulls littered within the other designs. What did come as a surprise to you was that most of the tattoo was war imagery.
Guns, dog tags, a tank, and a literal military soldier etched into his skin made it less a coincidence and more a deliberate design. It made your eyebrows knit together and you fought the urge to grab his arm to look closer.
Was he military? The more you thought about it, the more it started to make sense with the evidence that you had. Going away for months, the guns, the paranoia and depressive episodes, the wounds, all of it paired with his tattoo made it seem obvious and yet there was one issue.
If he was military, then why didn’t he tell you?
It made you curious and yet wary of the answer. Truly, you didn’t want to know, not when he was so adamant to keep it from you, as if knowing would be something that you would regret. 
Besides, someone in his family could be military and despite your reservations about them from your limited knowledge, you weren’t going to be upset if he got a tattoo for them in their memory.
Simon seemed to have noticed that you were staring at it and he placed his large hand over it, covering it from your view and snapping you out of your daze. He looked down at you, his eyes the same as always except you could see that serious look in them, the one demanded you to not ask questions.
“You still have that gift for me or do I need to do somethin’ else for it?” He wondered and you smiled.
“Wait here.” You handed him your plate before you got up and rushed to your room.
You grabbed the joke book from under your bed and made sure that the wrapping was intact. You went to walk out of your room but hesitated a pit growing in your stomach as you stared down at the silly birthday wrapping paper.
Were you really about to give a guy who might be military a joke book? Suddenly you felt foolish, as if you had been caught doing something that you shouldn’t have and you debated on whether you should pretend it got damaged to get something different. It would save you the embarrassment of giving him a stupid book but it would probably disappoint him in the process. 
You could unwrap it and give him the card instead, but that would nearly be almost more of a let down than the actual gift.
A huff left you and tapped your fingers against the wrapping paper.
You should’ve just gotten him a generic gift that most men get, like a bottle opener or a pocket knife. At least that way he wouldn’t have been too disappointed.
“Still there?” Simon called out and your heart jumped to your throat.
“Yeah, couldn't find it for a sec.” You lied and took a deep breath before you stepped out of your room. 
If you got this over with then at least you could get him a different one later. You could always tell him it was a gag gift in an attempt to save yourself too much embarrassment but you felt that somehow Simon would see right through your lie.
You walked into the living room, holding the book close to you as if it were something precious and sat down further away from him this time, noticing that he always had pulled his sleeves down. You glanced up at him to see that he had the excited look in his eyes like he had earlier in the morning which made you even more nervous.
“You didn’t tell me what you wanted so if it’s bad, I’m sorry.” You prefaced and watched as he raised an eyebrow.
“You’re overthinking this.” He tried to assure you with his usual deadpan tone.
“Maybe…just don’t laugh if it’s that bad.”
“I won’t.”
You hesitantly outstretched the gift for him and watched as he gently took it from your hands. You chewed on your lip as you watched him inspect the wrapping on it before he began to tear it off, causing you to grip the couch underneath you. You were practically burning holes into his face when he finally took all of the wrapping off and looked at the cover of the book.
Simon's eyes lit up and it helped calm some of your nerves. 
“I wasn’t sure what you were allowed to have when you’re gone but I got it travel sized.” You explained and he glanced at you with a twinkle in his eyes.
“You like my jokes that much?” He seemed amused by the idea and when you nodded, he huffed a laugh.
“There’s a card in the front.”
Simon pulled the card out, a simple card with a dinosaur on the front that had “ur old” written on the front, and sent you a quick glare that made you snicker. He opened the card and raised an eyebrow at the twenty pounds that fell onto his lap.
“Nobody likes cards without money.” You shrugged and he picked up the note to inspect it. “Use it to get cigarettes or something pretty.”
“Something pretty.” He repeated with amusement. “Think a I need a pop of color?”
“It’d do you good I think.”
He grunted and looked at the card, his face falling when his eyes landed on the polaroid that was taped on the inside and the writing that was scrawled onto the blank space of the card. His sudden change in his expression made you fidget with your fingers as you remembered the photo.
It was a rare photo of you and Simon together, one that you pretty much had to force him to take with you since he seemed to be allergic to any kind of camera. You promised him that it was just for you since you wanted to at least document that you were friends with him somehow. You ended up making two copies and thought it was fitting for him to have one since he was your friend after all.
“I forgot I put that in there…” You mumbled but trailed off as you realized he most likely wasn’t listening.
Simon read the words on the card over and over again, his eyes jumping from them to the polaroid as if he couldn’t understand what he was seeing. His shoulders had tensed up and his free hand clutched the banknote so tight that it crumpled in his grasp. 
By now you were worried that you had either overstepped or completely failed with the gift giving. You were disheartened, your throat tightening up just a bit as you tried to come up with something to say to alleviate the situation.
“You can ignore what’s on the card, I wrote it when you were gone.” Your eyes were glued to his face to see his reaction.
Simon’s eyes darted to you and you shrunk underneath his intense gaze. He was breathing ever so slightly harder, enough for you to notice, and his eyes hazy yet there was something deep hidden within them, something that made a shiver go down your spine. His gaze was too much but you still couldn’t look away as much as you wanted to, as if looking away from him would cause more trouble.
He haphazardly put the card down and before you could react, took your face into his hands and kissed you on the corner of the mouth.
You froze. Your eyes were wide and your heart was in your ears as your mind raced a million times a minute, trying to figure out if what just happened was real and if he truly meant to kiss you there. All the while Simon stared at you with similar shock, almost as if he didn’t mean for it to happen at all.
Was he going for your cheek and missed? Was he going for your lips and missed? Did he actually just kiss you or was it a really drunk hug?
You were panicking, your already shot nerves mixing with the alcohol created a strange feeling in your stomach that urged you to attempt to kiss him back. 
However, much to your dismay, he quickly pulled away from you before you could even have your lips connected. Heat immediately washed over you and you nearly ran out of the room as you scooted away from him, completely unable to look him in the eyes now as you felt the need to sink into the couch and never appear again.
You misread the situation, the alcohol had gotten you, the horrible, stupid liquid turned your brain to mush and made you too impulsive. You wanted to die, you wanted to do anything to get rid of the embarrassment you felt that you went to leave before Simon grabbed onto your wrist.
“Don’t.” He pulled you back down and kept hold of your wrist. “Look at me.”
You couldn’t make yourself look at him even if you wanted to. The thought of having to stare at his intense eye right now made you feel sick to your stomach. You just wanted to hide in your room until both of you decided that this never happened and that your friendship wasn’t ruined by a misunderstanding. 
“Please.” 
One word, soft and desperate, had you turning your entire body towards him immediately. You hesitated for a moment before you looked into his eyes, the comforting brown dowsing some of your nerves as he drank up your face, the intensity still there but held back by the fact that his face was red and he eyes broke from yours multiple times.
He looked just as embarrassed as you felt.
You were about to apologize when he cut you off.
“Not like this.” He swallowed hard and stared deep into your eyes hoping that you would understand what he meant without him having to say it out loud.
It took you a moment to realize and most of the embarrassment fading as his eyes darted away from yours. You stared down at his hand around your wrist, his hot skin against yours prickle with goosebumps before you eyes widened. If he doesn’t want to kiss you now that means he wants to kiss you later which means he’s thought about kissing you.
You felt dizzy at the thought and you could hardly think straight as it was. You couldn’t think about the implications of the words he said right now, not when you were stumbling drunk and close to a heart attack due to this very awkward situation that he admittedly put you both in. 
“Oh.”
That’s all you could think to say. A meek ‘oh’ as if that was enough to convey the feelings and thoughts raging inside of you that would surely clear the air if you said them yet you couldn’t find the words to do so. But right now maybe that wasn’t what you both needed.
No, right now you needed to ease the situation so you could think about this later with a clear mind and without screwing it up more.
“Tell me a joke.” You said, your voice still small, and he looked at you with confusion. “Tell me a joke, Simon.”
Simon let go of your wrist and turned away from you. He gave you one last glance before he picked up the joke book and flipped through the pages, taking his time to read through the lines which filled the room with awkward silence that mixed with the random movie on the TV. 
He took a deep breath and cleared his throat.
“What do you call a prisoner going down the stairs?” He asked and you knitted your eyebrow with confusion. He didn’t look up from the book when you didn’t answer but he nodded. “Condescending.”
“Oh man.” You scoffed, cringing at the horrible joke but finding it hard to not laugh all the same.
You fought against a smile that threatened to appear on your face and you made eye contact with Simon as he glanced at you. You watched as his shoulder relaxed slightly and he looked back down at the book in his hands, eyes skimming the words like mad.
“A book fell on my head today. I’ve only got my shelf to blame.”
“Ugh! Horrible.”
You couldn’t hold back your laughter now or the smile as the alcohol made it so much easier for the jokes to make you happy. You scooted closer to him and he turned his body towards you, his eyes still looking at you hesitantly, almost as if he was asking you permission to keep going or to even look at you, but he couldn’t help but smile as well. 
“What kind of murderer has fiber?” He asked and you shook your head. 
“I’m going to regret this aren’t I?” You waited for him to continue as you prematurely cringed from the bad joke that was about to grace your ears.
“A cereal killer.”
You made a disgusted sound but laughed and rested your forehead against his shoulder. You expected him to nudge you off but he didn’t and instead you heard him let out a quick sigh of relief before he flipped through the book again.
Simon rattled off a few more jokes, each of them making you laugh and taking the tension out of the air until both of you were settled against each other on the couch as if nothing had happened. He pressed his shoulder against yours as he closed the book and stared up at the ceiling. 
The movie took up the silence as you both sat there for a moment.
You looked up at him and he looked down at you when he saw you move from the corner of his eye. You took in his scars again and the way that they seemed more prominent from his red cheeks, looking into his eyes to see that they still had the tired look in them before you spoke.
“How drunk are you?” You wondered and he blinked.
“Not drunk enough to forget this.” He admitted, knowing exactly the reason why you asked him.
You nodded, knowing that you were the same. Even if you were more drunk than you were right now sure that you would remember something like this and yet the thought didn’t scare you. As embarrassing as it was, you didn’t want to forget it.
“Good.”
Link to Part 3
A/N: This feels messy but honestly I can't go back and restart so I hope it's okay. Also Idk how the UK money system works so just imagine what I put is correct and not wrong lol
EDIT: I forgot to put the tags sorry!! @msecho19
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prehistoricopossum · 4 months ago
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Deadpool and Wolverine Spoilers!!!
First things first, I absolutely loved Deadpool and Wolverine. Finally seeing these two characters done in a way that you can tell they all loved and had wanted for so long was so amazing to see.
But let me tell you…. I about had an aneurysm when fucking ELEKTRA showed up.
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This woman right here, was my childhood. She was the first female hero I got to see on the big screen fighting side by side with the heroes my dad watched. Little me was so excited to see that a girl could also be a hero. A girl could be badass. A girl could be just like those heroes my dad loved.
And so my obsession with Elektra began. I watched Daredevil over and over as a kid, then forced my dad to take me to see Elektra when it came out. He even brought me practice sais. As I’ve grown, I have always had a spot in my heart for Elektra, but I never have rewatched Daredevil or Elektra. I want to keep the rose colored glasses of my childhood on them. I want to keep that childlike amazement and love.
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As soon as Jennifer Garner stepped into the scene as the Elektra I grew up with, I gasped and immediately teared up. I never thought I would see her again, in a completely new story, as an adult. My inner child was screaming as I sat in the theater barely able to contain my excitement. I know she isn’t who a lot of people are excited for. There was Wesley Snipes bas as Blade, Chris Evans back as Jonny Storm, Channing Tatum finally getting his Gambit, but I couldn’t take my eyes off Elektra. It’s been over 20 years, but I still have my practice sais. I still have that love for her. And I am so happy Deadpool brought her back in such a respectful way and gave her some closure.
I wish I could show my appreciation to everyone involved in Deadpool and Wolverine for not only giving us a phenomenal movie, but also for giving me a piece of my childhood.
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notyourhetloki · 1 year ago
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sleepover (Ken x GN Reader)
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Reader: gender neutral
/Ken x Doll!Reader/
A/N: Hey! So... my requests are closed BUT with you'd like anything about this pretty himbo I would love to write it! Just send me a message ;)
Warnings: Technically SFW but very suggestive themes, I think "kissing laying down" would be equivalent to sex in Barbieland so… yeah. THEY DON'T HAVE GENITALS.
Now that Ken was your official boyfriend and you had gone on several dates together, you decided it was time for the next step.
When you invited Ken for a sleepover at your house, he almost burst into tears at how happy he was... but of course, he tried playing it cool. "Sure, doll."
In your bedroom, you watched movies as you played dress up, trying to match as many outfits as possible. You painted each other's nails and brushed each other's hair, gossiping about other dolls... you had a lot of fun!
As the night continued, you grew closer and closer to each other. Sitting on your bed with thighs and shoulders touching. He just couldn't wait any longer, so he went for it eventually.
Ken kissed you tenderly at first, holding the side of your face with one hand and holding yours with the other. You had kissed a hundred times by now, but it always felt like the first time...
Then, the kiss deepened. Ken was now holding you by the waist, desperate for some more contact... you hummed in approval as his tongue grazed yours and he smiled against your lips.
You parted to breathe, and a thought came to your mind... it felt a little dirty, but you assumed Ken wouldn't judge you. "Ken, what if... what if we like, kiss but... laying down?"
He gasped, putting his hand against his mouth. You soon realized he was blushing HARD, and you regretted saying anything. "Sorry! Am I going too fast? I didn't want to-"
"No! It's ok! I mean, I didn't think you'd ask, but... I'm down for it. I... really want to." Ken looked at you with soft blue eyes, almost pleading. He would never admit it but he was really needy, and just the thought of being more intimate with you made him shake in excitement.
"Oh! Ok, then... c'mere, baby." He loved when you called him 'baby', so he gladly obliged, laying down next to you on your bed. You started kissing immediately, hands roaming all over.
After what felt like a few minutes, Ken suddenly moved to be on top of you, kissing your jaw, then down your neck... A sound escaped your throat and you weren't quite sure what it was. But you liked it... really much.
"Ken... you're so good..." you whispered, and immediately you felt him shiver. God how he loved to be praised... it made his entire day, week even. He adored being praised by YOU specifically, and those words... in these circumstances... it made him feel something he didn't quite understand yet. Like a heat in his chest, in his belly... he wanted more.
"(Y/N)... please... say that again..." His eyes suddenly darker by his blown-out pupils, mouth slightly agape, hair all messy... he looked beautiful.
"You're so good, Ken... You're amazing..." You were cut out by his mouth crashing into yours, lips working fiercely while tongues danced around. It was messy, something you two were not accustomed to. It felt dirty but so good... you grasped Ken by his hair and he hummed in approval, while he grabbed at your waist and thighs, making you whine.
He eventually moved to your neck again, and you had the chance to think out loud. "This is how they do it in the Real World, right?"
Slightly out of breath, Ken looked up at you and responded. "Most definitely."
You two would make out for hours, grabbing and touching and kissing until you grew tired and decided to sleep. You hugged Ken from behind while he adjusted in your bed, completely overjoyed.
In the morning, while having breakfast, you two discussed the night before. "Woah... it was awesome. Like, the best experience I've ever had!" Ken exclaimed energetically. "Maybe next time we can do it like the movies?"
You looked at him in innocent confusion, expecting him to elaborate. "You know, with... less clothes..." His head was slightly down, so his eyes went up to meet yours, just like a puppy. You blushed hard at the thought, but smiled and nodded, seeing his expression change from pleading to relief to happiness in a matter of seconds. "Cool."
"Like the movies, huh? How long have you been thinking about that?"
"Uh... for a while now." He admitted, bringing his hand behind his head and flexing his bicep in the process, drawing a big smile from you.
"So... do you have any plans for tonight?" You asked mischievously, resting your head on your hands.
Ken looked right into your eyes before licking his lips and imitating your pose. "For you, I'm always available."
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thankskenpenders · 2 months ago
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Sonic x ...DC Comics?!
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We have our reveal of what our new Sonic comic crossover will be, and it's... not what I expected! We're getting a five-issue comic series mashing up Sonic with the DC Comics universe written by Ian Flynn, plus a slew of merch to go with it.
To be honest, I don't know how to feel about this? I don't feel the hype.
Okay, for one, cards on the table: I have more attachment to Marvel's cast of characters than DC's. Sue me. But it's not like I don't also like DC's heroes! I grew up watching the Batman movies and the Justice League cartoons and Adam West's Batman and whatnot. I loved Teen Titans so much as a kid that I was Robin one year for Halloween. DC's cool! People have been comparing Sonic to the Flash for years! So... why does this collab make me feel nothing?
Well, for one, it might be that I would prefer a series like this to be about Sonic and friends meeting the Justice League, as opposed to them being the Justice League. To me, personally, that just seems a little more interesting. Seeing how those characters play off of each other. People have been asking "who would win in a race, Sonic or the Flash?" for years, so that was kinda the thing I was latching onto as the impetus for this crossover. And yes, in the interview they tease the possibility of the actual characters meeting, but they're marketing it primarily via these mashup characters with Sonic and co. cosplaying as the Justice League, so I have to assume that's the main focus of the story.
But I'm also just sitting here like... why DC? Why is this the highest priority crossover to do with Sonic? It seems so arbitrary. Just mashing two random popular franchises together. It doesn't feel like something that resonates so heavily with Sonic that we just NEED this crossover to exist. The DC universe isn't something that has much of a thematic connection with Sonic. Like, you look at the TMNT x Naruto crossover, and THAT feels inspired. That's something you never would've thought would happen, but the second it's announced it seems so obvious, and the sick cover art sells the idea that it's gonna be something fun. (Hell, speaking of TMNT, that feels like a crossover that would've made way more sense to me. No, the single panel of the Archie comics they appeared in doesn't count.)
When the Sonic X DC thing is announced with a series of stock vectors of the Sonic cast cosplaying as the Justice League and the news that there will be a ton of merch for this, well. It just makes it seem like this is first and foremost a collab designed to generate new Funko Pops.
I don't know. I'm sure that whatever the actual story looks like, Ian will do his damnedest to make the comic fun. It'll probably be pretty decent. He's the perfect writer for this assignment. It's just not the crossover I would've requested. Maybe I'm just being a hater here. I know a lot of people are excited, with speculation about what other Sonic characters could take the roles of DC characters. Maybe showing something from the actual comic would've been a better sell. But, well, that's how I feel about it based on the announcement!
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thisismeracing · 21 days ago
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Can I please request a charles dating a Greek girl *like the Korean girl you did*???👉🏻👈🏻🥹🥹🥹🥺🥺
Hi, love!!! of course <3 here you go! sorry for taking forever, I was off for a bit and just got back hihih
Here's the Charles version - I'm so sorry I read Mick idk why, but do not fear for Millie will make justice (even if she was the wrong one in the first place lol).
MICK DATING A GREEK GIRL | MS47
Warnings: mentions of food; tooth-rotting fluff; mentions of family members; not proofread.
A/n: Just a quick reminder that there are many shades, experiences, and backgrounds when it comes to greeks and their culture, what I am writing does not resume everything, but rather brings a piece of it to the table. <3
▸ my masterlist | my taglist | patreon guide ▸ support my writing by reblogging, leaving a comment (don’t  forget to follow me if you like the piece), or buying me a coffee
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Mick already knows Greece, but when you two start dating he's in for a whole new adventure aka getting familiar with culture, sayings, and the idiom;
He becomes obsessed with Greek cuisine. To him, everything is better when it's Greek - greek rice, greek break, greek spaghetti, and the latter let it slip during an interview, and you bet Ferrari fans we're mad for a week or so;
He would encourage you guys to visit the less tourist-centered cities and islands, instead suggesting places where you grew up or had stories to tell;
Mick would make sure to always have his camera on him and register random photos of you - he has a 'Greek girl <3' folder that consists mostly of pictures of you;
Randomly learned to introduce himself in Greek, but got his age wrong and it didn't matter how many times you tried to correct him, he would always forget and say it wrong again, so you just accepted that he was one hundred five instead of twenty-five when in Greece;
Though Mick loved the homey cities, he also loved the famous islands and whenever you traveled there at least one weekend would be spent in one of those. Athenas, Santorini, Corfu, Mykonos, Crete, Zakynthos, Ithaca, you name it, he will pack his bags at the speed of light and be ready to tag along;
He would watch movies that were ambient in Greece and ask you if things were accurate. He looved Mamma Mia and Greek Wedding;
Totally hints that he wants to have a greek wedding after you attend one together; The plates breaking? The common cup? the wedding face? He watched it all in awe;
Now when it comes to meeting the family Mick is nervous. He wants to make everything right so he will try to at least introduce himself in Greek -and he'll most likely get nervous again and say he's one hundred-five years lol it becomes a family thing, and he feels at home around your folks;
Same to you and his family that will definitely put Greece on their next vacay destination just to spend some quality family time with everyone.
Overall Mick is just super curious and open to learning about you and your culture, and will go around talking about how cool things are in Greece because he's this type of person. He's obsessed with your country, but he's even more obsessed with you.
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flemingsfreckles · 4 months ago
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Replacement Part 7
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Read the rest of the series HERE!
Warnings: alcohol consumption, internalized homophobia, discussion of past emotional/physical abuse, description of a panic attack at the end
WC: 3.0k
A/N: okay I think I confused people, Part 6 has been out for a bit, I just failed to add it to my master list, it’s now on there, so if you missed it read that first.
Jessie had said you two didn’t need to spend the whole night together, but somehow that’s what ended up happening. You spent nearly every minute of that wedding side by side, with the exception of when Jessie was standing beside Janine at the altar. The closeness between the two of you had started even before the wedding day.
“Heard you’ve found yourself a date to the wedding this weekend.” Coffey had come up behind you after training one day, slinging her arm across your shoulders. You just squint in her direction. “Fleming?”
“Oh, that’s not a date, she just needed someone to go with, she wanted the company, she’s new here and still doesn’t know the team well, I think she also knew I didn’t know the Canadian side of Janine’s friends and family well, so I think it just made sense, Janine also teased her for not having someone to go with-”
You trail off your words when you hear Sam start to laugh. “Okay,” she pays your chest hard with her hand. “Whatever the excuse is, enjoy your evening, it’s good to see you two getting along, a lot of people would envy you getting to be her date.”
“It’s not a date.” You shove her off as you speak through your teeth at her, feeling your face start to heat up.
“Whatever you say. You two have gotten pretty close recently.” Sam rolls her eyes as she heads toward the showers while you split off going toward your cubby. She wasn’t wrong, you and Jessie had spent a lot more time together recently.
Jessie coming over had become more and more common in the past few weeks. On your off days, the two of you would grab a coffee, walk around, and usually end up back at your place. Jessie continued to claim she didn’t have her apartment unpacked yet so it was always your couch you ended up on.
You had developed a full on friendship with Jessie. And while you loved the time the two of you spent together, the closer you grew, the more panic alarms went off in your brain.
Just last week the two of you were both on the couch, just a couple inches from each other, the popcorn bowl being the only thing keeping your thighs from resting against each other. Jessie had been on a mission to force you to watch all the classic movies after she learned you hadn’t seen most of them when you were younger.
And while the television was playing the movie, you weren’t focusing on anything besides the woman sitting beside you. You held your breath at every movement she made, adjusting the blanket or the way she sat, each movement she made had you on edge. Each noise she made, a satisfied hum, a small snicker at something funny, little comments or fun facts she knew about the movie, all of the noises were slowly becoming engraved into your mind.
You nearly sent yourself into a coughing fit when you reached into the popcorn bowl to be met with the warmth of Jessie’s hand instead of the feeling of the popcorn. Jerking your hand away you muttered an apology to her before waiting to reach your own hand back into the bowl. You ignored the feeling for the rest of the night, and again and again when those feelings of warmth keeps arising when you’d see Jessie, hang out with Jessie, even think about Jessie.
Today when Jessie knocked at your door her knock was frantic. You quickly scrambled to the door, opening it to see an equally panicked looking midfielder, coffees in one hand, a notebook in the other.
“Hi?” You say, taking in the unusually frantic appearance of Jessie.
“I need help.” She says breathlessly before pushing her way inside. “I have to write a speech.”
“For?”
“Janine’s wedding.” She says, dropping the coffees on the table and opening the notebook she had brought.
You can’t help but stand there in shock, “That’s tomorrow Jessie!” Jessie who was normally so put together, so organized, had failed to write a speech she’s known about for months until the night before.
“You don’t think I know that!” Your eyes widen at Jessie as she raises her voice at you, loud in volume and higher pitched, her emotions coming though. She wasn’t one to yell often, on the pitch she’d get hot headed but hardly would she lose her temper off of it. “Sorry, clearly I’m stressed, but sorry.”
You spent the next hour trying to calm Jessie down. She vented about her nerves and her inability to put her feelings onto paper, you sat and listened, watching as she paced the length of your kitchen. You didn’t say much but you tried to help her get her thoughts and feelings into an organized speech. It took nearly 3 hours but before you knew it Jessie was reading through her speech to you for one final time, as you nodded along approving of every word she had written.
“I promise it’s perfect.” You gave her one final confirmation after listening to the speech again and again. Jessie was finally satisfied with it, she had packed up her notebook, thanking you tirelessly as she made her way to the door.
“Thank you again.” She said, her hand coming to rest on your shoulder. You give her a smile and a nod, as you do you swear you catch Jessie’s eyes drop to your lips for a moment before darting back to your eyes. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said with a smile before turning and heading down the hallway.
You now sat in the rows of chairs, among many of your Portland teammates. You watched as the ceremony started. You’d been to weddings before, they were cute and all but they never got your heart racing, they never gave you the desire to be up at the altar yourself. The issue was, this time it wasn’t the actual ceremony and vows of endless love that got your heart racing. It was the brown haired freckled girl standing just feet away from Janine who was causing the swell of emotions to build up in your chest.
When she had walked down the aisle, her arm linked with one of Janine’s husband’s groomsmen, you felt your heart beat harder. As she walked down, closer and closer, your heart rate picked up and when she glanced over to you with a smile your stomach flipped and you felt your knees grow weak. It was different seeing Jessie dressed up, her hair done, nearly curled and framing her face, her make up was natural and subtle, but it was the dress that was captivating you. You tore your eyes away to watch the rest of the bridal party walk down the aisle, followed by Janine, but that only kept your eyes off Jessie for a couple minutes.
You couldn’t seem to keep your eyes from wandering to her throughout the ceremony. No matter how much you would remind yourself to look at Janine and her to be husband, you’d catch yourself staring. She stood with a smile across her face as she watched her best friend get married. Your eyes spent way too long admiring the dress Jessie was standing wearing, suddenly feeling like your own dress shirt and pants were nothing in comparison to hers. She looked gorgeous and you knew it, her toned arms on display as they held flowers at her waist where the dress perfectly hugged her shape. It’s as if nothing and no one else exists at the ceremony, it’s only you, sitting staring at the beautiful woman in front of you. On a few occasions Jessie’s eyes would catch yours, making you instantly drop your eyes to the program, your lap, or directing them back to the sky, feeling embarrassed being caught.
The ceremony ends and you find yourself and the rest of the guests being ushered off into a cocktail hour before the reception. You stand around a small table and watch as the rest of the room interacts, making small talk with the other guests of how you knew Janine. You listen to stories of her childhood friends, her friends from school, neighbors, people from every walk of life who were here to celebrate her. You were never one for small talk but you manage for about an hour before your saving grace arrives at your side.
Feeling a poke in the back and a familiar voice fills your ears. “Hi.” You turn and Jessie is standing in front of you, her arms open. It had become common for her to greet you with a hug, so you moved into her giving her a hug before pulling back.
“You look good, that shirt was a good choice.” Jessie says as you watch her eyes scan you up and down. She had asked what you were wearing the other day and when you admitted you weren’t sure, she FaceTimed you and made you show her all the options. She hadn’t told you what to wear, but you had noticed the way she stared at you for an extra few seconds when you had put on the white top with the blue accent. You had kept her reaction in mind this morning when you had tossed it on. You can feel the heat from her gaze, you’re sure your cheeks are flushed.
“Oh thanks.” You clear your throat. “You look really great Jessie.” You compliment her back and you notice the way she bites back a smile as she gives you a quiet “thank you.”
“I need a drink, this is a lot of people and a lot of small talk, do you want one?” Jessie points over her shoulder toward the bar.
“Yeah, sure, that would actually be great.” You follow Jessie through the crowd of people and hop in the queue for drinks.
One drink quickly became two, and two became an unknown amount. You both had a few at the cocktail hour, followed by a few during dinner and before you knew it, the real party had started and you were watching your teammates dance around from the comfort of your chair. You smiled as you watched Jessie get dragged around the dance floor by Janine before she finally broke away and made a dash in your direction.
“Save me.” She whispered as she sat down in the chair next to you.
“Oh come on, it’s not that bad.” You rolls your eyes at her.
“Says you, you’ve hardly gotten up to dance yet.” Jessie reaches in front of you on the table, taking the drink in front of you and finishing it off in a single sip, causing you to raise an eyebrow in her direction.
“Hey!” You take the glass back from her quickly. “And that’s not true! I danced with Sam a bit ago, but then she ditched me so I came to sit back down.”
“Would you rather be dancing?”
You shrug, you liked dancing, it was fun, freeing, but the crowd of strangers deterred you ever so slightly. “I mean, I’ll maybe go once Sam or someone is free again.”
“I’m free.” Jessie directs a hand at her own chest.
“No, don’t be silly.” You shrug her off and direct your eyes back to the dance floor. “You don’t want to dance.”
“I’ll dance with you.” Jessie stands up, holding out her hand to you. You look between her face and her outstretched arm. Her expression is hard to read, she’s smiling at you but part of you can tell she probably had no interest in dancing herself.
“Only if you’re sure?” You look at Jessie, not wanting to force her to be uncomfortable. She nods quickly and smiles at you, confirming she wants to dance with you. “But let’s get drinks first.” You shake your empty glass in her direction before standing up.
You both grab drinks and make your way to the dance floor. It starts out silly, the two of you standing an uncomfortable distance apart while both half dancing, half standing there. But the longer the night goes on, and the more alcohol that gets put in your system, you both let loose slowly. Your bodies get closer as the night continues on and before you know it, Jessie’s front is nearly flush with your own as the two of you continue to dance in the crowd.
A slow song begins to play and it breaks both of you from your trance and you take a step back from Jessie, only now realizing how close your bodies had been and only now realizing how much you longed to be back with your body up against hers.
“Com’ here.” Jessie grabs your hand, she makes her way off the dance floor as the couples begin to slow dance.
“What, where are we going?” you giggle as Jessie pulls you through the reception. “Jessie.” you whine her name while still stumbling behind her.
She pulls you around a corner, putting herself against the wall and pulling you into her. “Hi.” her grin is huge across her face, shadows on both of your faces as the light from the moon outside crept through the window.
Your head was spinning, from the drinks and from Jessie's stupid beautiful face in front of you. The stupid beautiful face you couldn’t fall for. And while the thought of your mother screaming at you that you could never date a woman, never kiss a woman had started in your head, that sound faded as you watched Jessie lean in as she brought her lips to meet yours. On instinct your eyes closed, and you kissed Jessie back like your life depended on it. Melting into her warm lips, your hands coming up to rest on her hips, gently pulling her closer into you.
You can’t tell if the kiss lasts a minute or an hour. The intoxication of the alcohol you’d consumed and the intoxication of Jessie’s lips caused you to lose all track of time. You were floating for the few moments your bodies were connected.
When you pulled back it took only a few seconds for those voices, those lectures, that hatred of yourself, to come flooding back into your mind. Where Jessie’s hand gently held your cheek you now felt the too familiar sting of your mothers hand. It was as if someone had sucked all the alcohol from your system in an instant, incredibly aware and sober to the fact that you had just kissed Jessie, a girl, your teammate. The fact that you had kissed her and you liked it.
You just stared at her. Your mouth hung open, unsure of what to say or what to do. She still had a silly smile on her face as she looked back at you. Her smile fell quickly as she must’ve realized the terrified look across your own face.
“I have to go.” You try to step away from Jessie but she grabs your wrist.
“Wait.”
“No Jessie, we can’t, I can’t, I have to go.” You repeat again having to fight back the waver in your voice, blinking hard to avoid tears. You pull your wrist from her hand and walk in the direction of the exit.
You walk and walk and suddenly the walk turns into a jog before a sprint, fighting tears all the way. Thankfully, the venue wasn’t far from your apartment. You manage to keep your composure until you unlock your door.
When you get inside your apartment it feels like the world is closing in on you. You can hear your heart, pumping blood loud in your ears, it drowned and muffled any other sounds. You bent over, resting your head on the cool countertop, suddenly feeling a wave of sharp heat across your body.
You were sweating. In an attempt to cool yourself off you started to peel off the shirt and pants you were wearing. The very same shirt you had put on because of Jessie. Your panic increased as your hands shook making it harder and harder to undo the buttons on your chest.
You couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, you could only picture being 16 again, your parents in front of you, shaming you, screaming at you, you remembered the feeling of being told you no longer had a home there, all of it, you couldn’t think of anything else. Your hands continue to tremble as you pull your belt off and let your pants fall, nearly tripping out of them, your head starting to spin. You tried to fight off the lightheaded feeling, blinking hard as you made your way to the couch despite the tunnel vision you were experiencing.
The couch is a temporary sanctuary, you lay in your underwear and tank top on the fabric and try to focus on breathing. You’re not sure how long you sit, the room spinning around you.
You couldn’t call Janine, it was her wedding you had just ran from. You couldn’t call Sam, she was still at the wedding. You certainly couldn’t call Jessie. There was no one you could turn to, no one to confide in at the moment, so instead, you sat loathing in self hatred.
You sat staring at the ground in front of you, not able to break your stare, as the memories of your parents telling you everything that was wrong with you rang through your mind. The sound of your phone ringing from across the room breaks your mind from the fog it was in. You push yourself up from the couch and walk over to it to see Jessie’s face and name on.
Her face brings up mixed emotions, on one hand, it brings you happiness, deep down you know hearing her voice would be relaxing, she’d know how to calm you down. On the other, she’d make you spiral all over again, her voice would remind you of how she had called after you to wait as you had bolted from the reception. Instead of torturing yourself more, you walk away from the phone, letting it ring and ring, and move to your bedroom.
It wouldn’t fix anything long term but sleeping would at least help you get away for a couple hours.
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