#so i gave my my blOOD SWEAT AND TEARS
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In Motogp there’s so much money involved, performance anxiety dominates and builds up barriers. Everyone retreats into their own pack, nothing is done together anymore. And I just adapt to it, according to the theory that it’s better to be alone than to be in a group full of fake smiles. But relationships among athletes aren’t only the ones made via some direct, classic form of communication. In sport you can actually enter into communication with someone through other ways that are more mediated but, in some cases, even more profound. With Márquez, for example, we aren’t technically friends. We think highly of each other, we respect each other, we smile to each other when one sees the other one, over the past year he’s been very fair to me, often defining me as an ideal opponent. I think it’s because he knows that I can race him very hard, but always within the rules. Which is, even if for many may not seem like it, exactly the same thing he always did while racing against me. Marc may look crazy, but he actually stands out from clichés and defies physics laws in good conscience. Unlike other riders — those reckless ones with no sense of limit, who after a crash often say “I don’t know why I crashed” — Márquez knows very well why he crashes. He often precisely crashes on purpose, just to explore that limit. He does some experiments first, then goes on to elaborate his theory. In a way, he’s an empiricist exactly like my dad was, when he purposely kept taking more and more steps forward on the track to teach me how and where to brake. It’s just that in this case, it’s the rider that does it. I like Marc. And I interpreted our famous duels in 2017 as a means to get to know each other better. In Austria and Japan we indeed were extreme, but not crazy. Adventures-seekers who like to push themselves to the limit, but not insane and neither unfair to each other […] Deep down, he isn’t irresponsible, even if he often looks for some maneuvers that have no rhyme or reason. Theoretically, and practically, they don’t make any sense. Yet I never get angry about it, not even that time in Zeltweg when it looked like I told him to fuck off. It surprises me, instead, to see what he tried to do to get a win, something like “I can’t believe it”, an amazed curiosity to see how he tried to move into this uncharted territory, the same one where, thanks to him, I consequently went into as the well. And it’s so cool. As if we both dug together a whole new vein of gold: we won’t share the prize, of course, because to keep the gold is my goal, but we still dug through it together as if we were pioneers. And this indeed does create a bond, whatever is it.
And it’s even more incredible because I exactly know what Marc is going to do in that last turn in Zeltweg. Theoretically, he doesn’t have any more weapons to attack me: at this point his Honda has less traction, worn-out tyres, less power; generally speaking, Honda is less suited to this track than Ducati. And yet he got this far, in the end […] I well know that to have Marc right behind you while going through the last corner is way too much of a problem, the worst thing it could happen to you: he’s going to try it anyway anywhere. So I’ll be there, waiting for him […] Even if we’re going at 200 km/h, I can feel upon my skin how meters get marked bit by bit. One after another. I force myself to focus on his engine’s sound to understand when and where he will attack. And when the noise is there, almost unbearable, I brake hard and leave him a bit of space on the inside line, to force him to exaggerate a bit and then overtake him in acceleration. It’s almost as if I just accepted his invite, just to deceive him later. It might look like it’s just a technical challenge, or a stunt one, but it’s actually about mind games, an hand in glove tied relationship in which our minds get connected. As in bull and bullfighter kind of way. Or, in a I know that you know that I know kind of way. To get a win in this way is a much more difficult thing to achieve, but it is much more cooler as well. When Marc gets on the inside Iine I just know that I made it, because he’s a champion, but he cannot overcome the laws of psychic. My plan gets fulfilled and the dissolving noise of his bike as he goes wide resonates with liberation. That’s when I make that gesture, automatically. Fuck off, you just got played! Real subtitle is: what did you make me do, you bastard? It’s my third win this year. It’s now clear that I am the one challenging Márquez for the title. But to me this doesn’t matter. Like it doesn’t matter that much how I just won against the one who is recognized as the hand-to-hand duels master […] What matters most is that this race has been a way to get to know each other better. Márquez, with his usual Joker smile, confesses that if he hadn’t tried to surpass me he wouldn’t have slept at all that night. That’s what perfectly defines what he is: as long as he is breathing, he will try to pass you even if he had to go through a wall.
In Motegi it isn’t that different. Here, as well, Márquez is struggling a bit more than me, but I am sure he is going to try it in the last corner. Why shouldn’t he? We’ve been “beating” each other as if there was no tomorrow for the last six laps, in some apocalyptic conditions: heavy rain, curling-like grip, no visibility at all […] Ten minutes ago I wouldn’t have thought we’d get to this point, but as soon as Márquez did a little mistake I got back on track and now we’re here, us again. Ehi, Marc, how are you doing? Our connection in Zeltweg has been restored on the other side of the world. It’s now clear that everything that is going to happen now would not be possible without the other’s collaboration. Like two alpinists in a rope team, we will get ‘till the last meter together. We overtake and we get overtaken. We give and we take. We sting like bees, fly like butterflies, and more than anything we hit like blacksmiths. At Turn 10, I change my trajectory: I’ve been studying Marc for quite a lot from behind and now I imitate him, going a bit wider. This allows me to get into Turn 11 very fast, ready for my strong suit: braking. That’s how I easily overtake him. The Ducati is very stable, everything is under control. I’d be sure to get a win at that point but an alarm goes off in my mind: I won’t give it to you this easily. Exactly. Last corner is on the right. Giving my position it’s obvious that there isn’t any physical space to get on the inside, but imagine if he does really give a damn. When I’m about to lean into the Turn, Marc abruptly arrives out of nowhere as gracefully as Hulk in a china shop. It’s not even a dirty try, more like a circus number: his engine’s noise getting closer echoes into my helmet like the drum rolls that comes just before a trapeze artist jumps. Ladies and gentlemen, Marc Márquez! Where the fuck do you want to go? You’re still sitting straight, I’m already leaning: don’t you see that we’re touching? I don’t know how, but I keep the bike in control. I suspend my maneuver for a millisecond, just enough to let him slide on the outside as I go on riding through the apex. At that point he’s way too wide, he pulls half of a miracle by leaning all on the right to keep his bike on track but has no margin for anything else. Farewell, bye, goodbye. I win today. Again. After the finish line, we stop near the track side by side. Our gloves touch. Contact. Knowledge of the other has deepened. Relationship was preserved. Despite everything, no one cut the rope and we got to the mountaintop together. It’s an awesome feeling. That’s exactly the sport that I would always like. Especially because I won. On TV I eventually admit that to win against Márquez in what he does best really excites me: this is the boost that I need for the climb to the championship, at only 11 points from the lead. Marc showers me with compliments and says that it’s awesome to battle with me for the title, the living proof that professionalism and hard work pay off. He calls me a good guy as well, and I forgive him. Actually, no. Why should I be ashamed [of being a good guy]? To pretend to be a bad guy is something that everybody can do. To actually be one when it’s needed, and to do it with a certain style, it’s something for the few.
— andrea dovizioso talking about his relationship and his duels with marc márquez in asfalto (2018)
#THIS TOOK ME WAY TOO LONG i gave away my sweat tears and blood#andrea made my life SO difficult in just three pages#this is a very (un)serious dovquez masterpost#still speechless. wish i could translate it better. he’s insane#andrea dovizioso#marc marquez#dovquez#asfalto
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I found the album one sweltering afternoon in mid-summer, a month since we’d laid Gramps to rest. Rummaging through the dusty boxes and stacks of back copies of society magazines, I stubbed my toe on the trunk where it was kept, old and battered, sat in a dark corner of the attic.
I took the album, dusted it off, and sat down on a nearby stool. The cover was made of leather, cracked through with age and neatly labeled 1953-1954 in faded gold lettering. I flipped through the pages so yellowed with age, dust motes swirl in front of me as I make sense of what I’m looking at.
It was pictures of Gramps as a younger man. We knew that he was a film star back in the day, and that he was quite famous too, a real matinée idol. It seemed impossible to me then that he had a whole other life for he was always just Gramps; he seemed to always be humming and dancing, constantly moving or cooking up a storm in the kitchen.
Gramps was like magic and fairy dust, his warmth and gentleness touched anyone he came across. He was the grandfather who was up for anything, never raised his voice and talked to you like a grown-up. He was wise and funny and always pushed you to be a better version of yourself. Many a time I spent in Gramps kitchen, listening to him tell stories of film sets and the soaring lives of Hollywood’s finest.
My greatest regret was not asking him about his life when I had the chance. For no one bothered to, he was always just there, woven into the fabric of our lives. None of us really knew anything about him and the questions that had always lingered in the back of my mind resurfaced.
There were other things in the album, ticket stubs and dried flowers and a million other keepsakes. But what seemed to feature most prominently was a young man who looked to be about the same age as Gramps. He had a shy smile and a tentative look in his eyes. He was very handsome.
It seemed that he was also an actor and that at one point worked on a film with Gramps. There was a photograph of a cluster of smiling people and at the very center was the shy handsome man. His gummy smile was breathtaking but he was looking at someone or something out of frame.
As I looked through the rest of the album, a thick packet of letters fell to the floor. They were tied together by a faded red ribbon and at a glance I could see neat loopy script. I knew instinctively that these were all from the handsome man with the gummy smile.
My mind raced with a thousand questions and I burned with a longing to read them yet a sense of wrongness pervaded me. I would be intruding on my grandfather’s privacy. There was a secret buried here that much was true. For now I tuck the album under my arm and make my way downstairs.
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Inspired by this post by @bigassbowlingballhead
I have absolutely no idea how I went from making a silly little edit to having an entire backstory to the silly little edit.
This also broke an almost 3 year streak of no writing. I don't think this is my best work, I'm rusty like an old bicycle but I'm quite surprised I managed to write something. So thanks for that Jon!
This is also by the way heavily inspired by a Danielle Steel novel I once read that I cannot remember the name of. In that story it featured a box, a locket and a packet of letters.
This is literally titled Hot Gramps on my laptop. You can click on the images to make it bigger.
Also did you know that the SAG was founded in 1933? And AFTRA was founded in 1952 but the two only merged in 2012. And that the first Emmy Awards were held in 1949?
#taylor zakhar perez#nicholas galitzine#taynick#does this count as a taynick au???#I think so#was the research necessary? probably not#will my crippling need for perfection scream if i don't get shit right? yes yes it will#did i also read up on that vanity fair article of cary grant and randolph scott? you bet i did#sings i gave my blood sweat and tears for thiiissss#no joke 5-10 mins in i wanted to kermit#at one point my laptop froze bec the images were too big#also me??? tense switching in my writing??? more likely than you think
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#ssoblr#star stable#This has been such a long time coming#I had the idea around the time we got the new character models and tried with those first#but the old unrealistic proportions with the high waisted bottoms and really cropped tops just fit so much better#So I decided to “just” do it in Blender#As you can see I managed to get the basics to work#but I didn't have access to SSO's rigs#so I wasn't able to pose them at all and they're stuck in these awkward t-poses#But I had too much fun and put in too much blood sweat and tears to not share them anyway#it was really fun getting to mix the old and new models#for example with the hair styles#so I was able to choose the best of both worlds#i kinda gave up on the old models and blender half way through and settled on just doing it in game with the new models#i also didnt wanna let the beautiful butterfly decorations of the temporary race go to waste#but that reignited my obsession and i finished the blender project too#or at least as finished as i managed to get it#hope you like it!#star stable online#sso#starstable#winx#winx club
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*in tears* frog.......!!!! frog frog frog 🐸
#*mabel voice* I MADE HIM WITH MY BLOOD. SWEAT. TEARS. AND OTHER FLUIDS#he is. chunky. and i had a hard time with the wire. and in finding good lighting to pose him in#but he looks so cute over there on the record player like the birdhouse is his little home!!!!!! he's growing on me!!!!!!!!#ALSO THE EYES GAVE ME A HARD TIME. MAYBE NEXT TIME I'LL BUY EYES.#anyway yeah i fought for my damn life crocheting this frog. i am still recovering.#lulu makes frogs
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Here's a sneak peak at my piece, Castles Crumbling, that I wrote for the @aabadendingzine which is open for preorders this entire month! It's based off of Turnabout Succession and absolutely nothing bad happens at all in the entire story which you can trust because when have I ever led you astray, other than that one time we were playing Among Us and I was definitely the imposter?
It's pay what you can with all proceeds going to the Transgender Law Center, and you can preorder here, so please consider giving it a buy!
#mea culpa#aabadendingzine#preview#vera misham#drew misham#please enjoy if you do give it a buy#i gave my blood sweat and tears for this#so it would really mean a lot if you would support it#especially when it's such an important cause
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mexico city night 3 WON the surprise song race of the entire international leg. idc what happens next I can sleep peacefully every night knowing I was in the crowd when Cornelia Street/YOYOK happened. I'm never getting over this wtf
#taylor swift we forgive you for your sins (rwylm in santa clara)#IT'S JUST. YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.#I HAD COMPLETELY GIVEN UP ON YOYOK#the first time she sang it i held hope bc she could repeat it#but when she sang it in LA i just knew it would be a while before she did it again#me and my uncle had an entire joke about how CORNELIA STREET was pretty much all we had left#all the time we were waiting to get in we were joking with other ppl about how we had to get cornelia street tonight#heck my grandma even prayed we would get it (i'm not even joking and the fact it worked is lowkey making me think there is a bigger force)#AND WE ACTUALLY GOT IT. AND YOYOK LIKE HOW TF DID WE GET YOYOK JUST. WHAT.#I GOT TO SCREAM 'I GAVE MY BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS FOR THIS'#IT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME I WAS BAWLING MY EYES OYT#I don't remember anything between yoyok and anti-hero bc I was crying so fucking much it was that bad#this was the best concert ever i don't think anything will top it#i'm gonna need like 9 years to process it#📀: lover#📀: midnights#🎤: taylor swift#cornelia street#you're on your own kid#yoyok#lover#midnights#taylor swift#the eras tour#the eras tour latam#swifties#cee speaks into the void#cee goes to the eras tour
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here we have firstprince fic inspired by the plane crash episode in greys anatomy (because I'm sick and twisted and fucked in the head like that)
#like taylor swift once said#i gave my blood sweat and tears for this#so y'all better read it 🔫#red white and royal blue#firstprince#firstprince fic#alex claremont diaz#henry fox mountchristen windsor#greys anatomy#crys' firstprince greys anatomy au(ish)
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I will not be anonymous about this!
The vibe you give off is hopeful.
Right now, life is hard, but you don't give up.
You see all the bad and acknowledge it, but you don't give up.
You have been hurt in the past, but you don't give up.
Your heart is pure. Your soul is indomitable. Your will is invincible.
🥺
#hi#I know you sent this awhile ago#but I didn’t know how to reply for the longest time#hearing that I give off hopeful vibes is so heartwarming#I really really try to give off hope#cause yeah I know I’m down sometimes but at the end of the day if you have hope? that’s all you need#hope is probably my favorite word#I’m going to get it tattooed on me sometime#idk if it’ll just be hope or what#also that quote or twitter post you added gave me chills#I took a screenshot of it and I’m going to keep it close#whenever I’m having a really rough day I’m going to look at it#I want to be the face of hope#not the one where she is beautiful and flawless#her hair is perfect and nothing is out of place#no no no#that’s not what real hope is#hope is the girl who just got out of battle#covered in blood sweat and tears#she rises again even if she feels defeated#cause tomorrow is always a new day#thank you so so much for the kind words lovely#I really appreciate it 🥺🥰#ask#sweet asks#fav asks
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I'M SO HAPPY YOU GOY TICKETS YOU DESERVE THEM I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU <33333
THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH 🥹 THIS IS PROBABLY THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE 😭
#I LITERALLY GAVE MY BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS FOR THIS#I'M SO FUCKING TIRED BUT I SURVIVED 🥹#thank you sm bestie! ily sm!#asked
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spongebob the musical on broadway was so much fun. one of the best experiences of my entire life. I am a theatre kid at heart always.
#personal#bro seeing SpongeBob twice was the best decisions of my life ugh I miss broadway !!!!#Ethan slater gave his blood sweat and tears for this character he deserves so much more credit!!!!!!!!!
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im sure this feeling will pass but I feel like im not made for comics
#I draw a lot#and just drawing and practicing won’t make u good at comics it’s a whole different skill set that u have to work at#I often feel my brain is overloaded on information#if I try a new skill my brain will explode#I still try tho#but yeah even while training for SYS i make lil comics on the side#we wanna work on SYS for a while but chevy and I have other projects too#and I want to tell stories and draw them#but I start so many things and never finish them#it feels like I can’t finish them#whether it be comics or stories or illustrations#I rlly tried a few days ago to get my little sonic au comic out and I burnt out after like. 4 ‘panels’#and to be fair it was all off the dome#no thumbnailing or anything so duh#but even before that#my undertale au from like. 2017 that I made actual thumbs for I did concept art for#I even learned pixel art for (it was bad pixel art but still)#and I gave up right as the first chapter ended#never went back to it. Chevy and I have poured so many years and blood n sweat n tears into SYS! and chevy manages to have so many other#projects at the same time that they’re balancing and planning#we have another two comics we wanna plan too and we’re in mid production for the second one#but. I feel like such a failure when it comes to SYS#we wanted it to release December last year and look where we are now#I got sick and fucked up my wrist bad and chevy got a job so it’s not like we just haven’t done anything#chevy is writing a whole nother comic at the same time and I’m trying to learn learn learn#but maybe. im not built for it#or. maybe I just need to let myself be disatisfied. everyone tells me to do it scared. and that’s true#but I also neee to learn more o do it badly#I’ve read webcomics with art that was genuinely hard to look at because I loved it#im not helping anyone by wondering and going what if what if what if. issa leap of faith or whateva that white man said
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the holy trinity of you're on your own kid / you always have been / yeah, you can face this makes me cry
#i play it cool with the best of them?? it's okay we're the best of friends... anyway?? i didn't choose this town i dream of getting out??#i search the party of better bodies / just to learn that you never cared / just to learn that my dreams aren't rare??#I GAVE MY BLOOD SWEAT AND TEARS FOR THIS!!#everything you lose is a step you take so make the friendship bracelets??#a certified claire song sorry not sorry 🤧
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guys sorry i know i ranted and raved about this but ive decided youre on your own kid is actually elevens song
#its just so her#maybe el and will combined#but like#i picked the petals he loves me not#i gave my blood sweat and tears for this#like i’d be saved by the perfect kiss#THIS IS SO EL???#i looked around in a blood soaked gown#THIS SONG IS WRITTEN ABOUT HER?3!!:!2!!!!#make the friendship bracelets#aka bff max#❤️❤️❤️#stranger things#eleven#eleven hopper#its the truth im sorry#ive changed my mind
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Tags.
#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 / * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙩𝙚𝙭𝙩 / the old taylor can't come to the phone right now * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙞𝙣𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙜��𝙖𝙢 / my cheeks are growing tired from turning red and faking smiles * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙨𝙤𝙘𝙞𝙖𝙡 𝙢𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙖 / say it in the street that's a knock out but you say it in a tweet that's a cop out * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 / I heard every album listened to the radio * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙩𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙬𝙞𝙛𝙩 𝙙𝙚𝙗𝙪𝙩 / there's no time for tears I'm just sitting here planning my revenge * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙛𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙡𝙚𝙨𝙨 / you take my hand and drag my head first fearless * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙖𝙠 𝙣𝙤𝙬 / I hear the preacher say “speak now or forever hold your peace” * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙧𝙚𝙙 / I still see it all in my head in burning red * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝟭𝟵𝟴𝟵 / darling I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙪𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣 / my reputations never been worse * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 / I take this magnetic force of a man to be my lover * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙛𝙤𝙡𝙠𝙡𝙤𝙧𝙚 / passed down like folk songs the love lasts so long * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚 / this pain would be for evermore * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙢𝙞𝙙𝙣𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 / midnights become my afternoons * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙩𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣 / he's got my past frozen behind glass but I've got me * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙧𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙘𝙤𝙧𝙙𝙨 / you hear my stolen lullabies * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙢𝙪𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜 / I had a marvellous time ruining everything * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙚𝙧𝙖𝙨 𝙩𝙤𝙪𝙧 / I gave my blood sweat and tears for this * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨 / in dreams I meet you in warm conversation * ⟳#✧˚ · .⠀ ▎ 𝙫𝙞𝙨𝙪𝙖𝙡𝙨 / I swear I'm only cryptic and machiavellian 'cause I care * ⟳
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The Albatross
summary: Originally an unlikely match, you give birth to Aegon’s first child and his entire world changes.
pairing: Aegon x Strong!Reader
word count: 767
warnings: Description of pain & childbirth, brief mention of blood, guilt.
note: “Albatross” is used metaphorically as a psychological burden dealing with shame or guilt! (and shout out to Taylor Swift)
Aegon wanted to hate you. He wanted to hate your hair and your eyes. Your thick eyelashes, the freckles that dusted your cheeks, the way your nose scrunched when you laughed. Despite wanting to hate you in your entirety, he found himself physically incapable of doing so. As a young boy he refused to admit it, even going so far as to tease you for your features — but he thought you were beautiful. If anything, you could’ve resembled his mother more than a Targaryen.
It wasn’t your features that were wrong, but who you inherited them from; you and your brother’s served as living, breathing reminders of Rhaenyra’s infidelity.
Alicent Hightower had been sure to remind him and his siblings that you and your brothers were a product of their older sister's infidelity. An embarrassment to the family. An insult to the crown, to the realm. Abominations. Bastards.
Screams of pain shook the walls of the Red Keep.
“I can’t do this anymore, Aegon! Please make it stop, it hurts!” you rasped, clawing at the blood-soaked bedsheets. It had been almost 24 hours since your labors had begun. To everyone's surprise, Aegon had yet to leave your side.
“We’re almost there, my love. You’re doing a great job,” your husband encouraged as he placed a chaste kiss to your sweat-drenched forehead, which you only returned with a death glare.
“I cannot take it anymore! Just get it out! Cut it out if you have to!”
One of your handmaids tried to dab at your forehead with a cloth, but you gripped her hand forcefully.
Aegon gave her a sympathetic look as he got her out of your grasp, locking his fingers with yours.
“You know we can’t do that, my love. I will not risk losing you.”
You winced as your midwife slid a finger around the base of your opening. All day long you had been violated against your will. Childbirth was not only painful, but humiliating. For Aegon’s sake, you silently prayed the babe was a boy. You weren’t sure if you would be willing to go through this again.
“I can feel the head, your grace. Just a few more big pushes for me and the babe will be here.”
You groaned loudly, your teeth grinding together as another contraction wracked your frame. Pain radiated down your spine and into your groin. You felt like you were being ripped apart at the seams. Being eaten by Sunfyre seemed to be a more pleasant fate than this.
“You hear that? You’re almost done. You’re doing so good.”
You squeezed onto Aegon’s hand as hard as you could, pushing with all the strength in your body. The harder you pushed, the sooner it would be over. You needed it to be over. With a final push, your vision began to blur and your mind went blank.
Before you knew it, loud cries pulled you back to Earth, and coo’s from your handmaidens filled the room. You laid back with a sigh of relief.
Finally.
The handmaids quickly handed the babe to Aegon so you could get cleaned up.
“A girl,” she stated proudly, “and she looks just like you, my queen.”
“Like me?” You shot up.
“Lay back your grace, you need to relax,” she scolded you.
Throughout your pregnancy there was a fear in the back of your mind, that if the babe inherited your features that Aegon would be disappointed. Turns out, you couldn’t have been more wrong.
“Yes,” he chuckled, tears swelling in his eyes, “like you. She is absolutely beautiful.”
He placed the baby in your arms, smiling down at the two of you.
A wave of guilt had crashed over Aegon at the sight of his newborn daughter. As well as your initial reaction to her looks. Thinking about the torment you endured for those same features in a world full of violet eyes and snow-white hair. How could he have been so cruel to you for something so fickle?
He couldn’t help but think about Ser Harwin Strong. And the fact that he probably shared the same thoughts as him the first time he laid eyes on you as a babe. This baby was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and the thought of anyone making her believe anything else made his blood boil. He would simply not allow it. Anyone who even dare whisper a word regarding your daughters features would lose their tongue for it.
Although the responsibility of sitting the Iron Throne loomed heavy over Aegon’s head it wasn’t until this very moment that he had true reason to be motivated to rule: his new family
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My miracle
Anthony Bridgerton x reader
summary: Anthony’s wife is in labor and it’s not looking good
warnings: mentions of death
“Where is she?” the loud voice of Anthony was heard in the entire mansion. The door he opened slammed into the wall but he couldn’t care less as he saw some servants running his way to take off his coat. “Tell me where my wife is!”
“My apologies, my Lord.” the poor man trembled under the Lord’s menacingly glare, that were just a cover for the worry and fear that was running though his veins. “The Viscountess is in your chambers. The midwife and your mother are already present with her. Shall I inform your brothers to come and wait with you until the child is born?”
Anthony didn’t bother to respond. He quickly climbed the stairs, two steps at once, seeing with wide eyes as the maids ran to his room with towels in their hands. He doesn't even settle for knocking, immediatly opening the bedroom door. None of his mother's stories could have prepared him for the sight that lay ahead.
His darling wife was drenched in sweat, dressed in her nightdown. One hand was on her round belly protectively while the other was in his mother’s hands, who was whispering words of comfort. Her jaw was clenched in pain and it was only then that he noticed the midwife between the Viscountess legs.
“You!” Y/n screamed accusingly, managing to point a finger at Anthony with hatred. “You did this to me! You will never ever put your hands on me again!”
“I-” Anthony was at loss of words. He knew that his wife was in pain, and looking like she was ready to kill, so he just nodded his head in agreement. He took slow hesitant steps towards the bed, hoping to comfort her without dying. “I’ll never touch you again, my love. How are you feeling?”
“How do you think I’m feeling? I’m pushing your child that inherited your big head out of my lady parts! So tell me, my dear husband, how am I feeling?”
“Like you are giving birth?”
“Anthony...” his mother whispered while shaking her head in dispair. “You should leave the room. Your brothers must be coming to keep you company. We shall call you when the child is born.”
“I’m not leaving my wife.” was the only thing he said with firmity, holding Y/n’s hand and kissing her soft skin gently.
She turned to him, a change in her demeanor, eyes full of tears of terror. “I’m scared, Anthony. It hurts.”
“I know it hurts. It’s okay, love. You will be alright and then we will have our child with us.” he whispered. A feeling of guilt washed through him. How could he have made his wife suffer through childbirth? “You are the bravest person I know. So so much braver than me and everyone else. I’m so proud of you.”
"I can't do this. It hurts too much. Make it stop, Anthony, please." Y/n cried.
It was only then that Anthony saw the look in his mother. She was worried, exchanging looks with the midwife. And as much as the Viscount would like to also show his anguish, his first priority was to comfort Y/n. "It's going to be okay, my love. Just a little longer, you're being so strong."
But she no longer had the strength to respond. It was getting harder and harder to keep her eyes open and she just wanted to sleep to escape the pain. Between her legs, an increasingly larger pool of blood was forming. Anthony's eyes were wide and there was enormous pressure in his chest. It felt like I was running out of oxygen, and it only got worse when Y/n finally gave in to unconsciousness.
"What's happening?" he whispered, looking in alarm first at Violet. Afterwards, he turned to the midwife furiously. "What's wrong with her? Help her! Do something!"
"Anthony, you need to leave." Violet advised, trying to remain calm for everyone's sake. Anthony was becoming more and more desperate, tears falling from his eyes as he grabbed his wife's hand tighter and brought it to his lips.
"I'm not going anywhere!"
"Viscount Bridgerton, the baby is in pain. You won't want to see what I'm going to do. I promise I'll try to save both of them." the midwife said, taking a small knife and flying it over Y/n's stomach.
"If you need to choose, save my wife's life." Anthony begged, now more desperate as his mother called his brothers to take him out of the room.
"Anthony..."
"No, mother, you save my wife's life!" Benedict and Collin grabbed the man by the arms and began to carry him outside, despite Anthony's struggle. "You hear me! My wife is going to survive! Let me go! Mother, save Y/n!" he shouted before the door closed in his face.
The last thing he saw was the woman making the cut on Y/n's stomach, who woke up with a jolt. She then let out a scream that would torment Anthony for the rest of his life.
With a cry of anger mixed with sadness, Anthony broke free from his brothers' grip and put his hands to his face. He didn't want to think about the possibility of losing the love of his life. He simply couldn't take it.
"Wow, Anthony, calm down." Collin whispered when Anthony, in a rage, threw a punch against the wall. "The Viscountess is a fighter. If anyone is capable of overcoming this, it's her."
"You don't tell me to calm down, Collin. Not when my wife is in that room fighting for her life over something I did." he cried, jaw shaking and eyes red that only showed the immense pain he was in. He sat on the floor, leaning his head back and looking at the ceiling. "I need her to live."
"And she will live, brother. I will bring a drink, and we will wait together for news." Benedict said, rushing to bring the alcohol when Y/n's screams became louder.
On one hand, each scream was like a stab in the heart of Anthony, who was increasingly pale and looked like he was going to vomit at any moment. On the other, it was the only way to know she was alive.
Moments passed. The Viscount didn't know if it had been seconds, minutes or hours. Things seemed to be getting mixed up in his mind. Nothing made sense, not when the love of his life was in the next room in pain and he was away from her. He had to protect her, it was his obligation as a husband. And he failed.
And then came the moment when Anthony's heart stopped. A baby's cry was heard, and he allowed himself to smile a little. He had a son or daughter. A mini version of his wife. And then he burst into tears when Y/n stopped screaming and everything became too silent.
It was uncontrollable. He cried without being able to stop, making it even difficult to breathe in. Anthony refused to believe that he would have to raise this child without Y/n. Without her affection, her kindness, her love. He didn't want to open his eyes and realize that all this wasn't a nightmare, but reality.
Benedict and Collin didn't know what to do. But one thing was certain, they would be there to help Anthony with whatever he needed and never let that child forget the wonderful mother he had. Then, Violet left the room holding a pile of blankets that held the baby.
"You have a daughter, Anthony."
He just cried more. His body was shaking and he couldn't even look at his mother and the baby. "Y/n... Is she...?" He took Violet's silence as a yes. "Oh god..."
"Enter the room, Anthony. She is waiting for you."
Anthony had never stood up so quickly in his life. He quickly opened the door, stopping momentarily when he saw the amount of blood on the sheets, but the most important thing was Y/n's half-open eyes. She was alive and looking around the room in confusion.
"Anthony? Where is my baby?" her voice was hoarse and extremely weak.
The man fell to his knees at the edge of her bed, and lowered his head to rest on her chest. A feeling of relief spread throughout his body when he felt the rising and falling movement of her chest, indicating that she was breathing and that it wasn't just his imagination.
"I love you so much." he cried, feeling her hands start stroking his hair. "I'm sorry. You were so brave and strong. I'm so proud of you, my love."
"Where is my baby?" Y/n didn't want to seem like she didn't appreciate Anthony's words because that was a lie. He was the most important person in her life. But at that moment, Y/n just wanted to know where her baby was.
"She's right here, dear." Violet reassured with a smile, announcing her presence.
Very carefully, she passed the child into the arms of her son's wife, her smile widening as the little family was finally together again. The new parents had a gentle smile as they looked at their creation, a new love emerging for this fragile human being.
Anthony kissed Y/n's temple. "We have a daughter."
"She is beautiful."
"She takes after her mother." Anthony quickly said, never feeling so much love as he did in that moment.
He was extremely proud of Y/n admiring her strength and courage. Now, he was going to protect his two girls until the end of his life. Nothing was more important than his family.
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