#so i decided id try to represent both and becuz im a lil fucken goblin its done in one of the angstiest ways possible lol | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

this-should-do · 2 years ago

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i think i might genuinely be a genius for using "gordon" "freeman" to refer to different aspects of gordon and using "gordon freeman" to refer when the two aspects are functioning in tandem i feel so smart for it, i hope it comes across as impactful and clear for readers as i hope lol

#the descision was inspired by reading so many diff fics where authkrs use either name and how jt changes how u #i terpeet the character and vice versa #so i wanted to use both becuz i like both super serious hardened freem@ns and softer kinder gordos #so i decided id try to represent both and becuz im a lil fucken goblin its done in one of the angstiest ways possible lol #it also allows me to have a i ternal monilogue that contradicts the enternal actions becuz its one part of gorson winning out over the othe #but not in a these are two seperate people #but in a one is his default personal state the other is a impersonal persona shaped by nescessity trauma and other influence used to #protect his own psyche #but it is kinda maladaptive and neither are good at careing for the self in the long run but is better at immediate sutvival but they also #lack self preservation becuz of the outside influence of being needed by others to save them #its complicated #i love coming uo with ways to reconsile the many different interpretations of gordon i have and making my own fucked up guy #oh god im so excited to finally show anybody this fic #cuz im thinkjng once i get sum people to beta read it i guess is what it is?? ill post it on a03 #and its great cuz the way ive co structed it is that since its bases on the interior and exterior face thing of how people interact with #the world i can still use it for prerescas just how the personas act is different and they combine and shift and change #doubt ill ever write all that tho but its solidfying in ny brain and i can see it so clearly #iwillspeakincessantly

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