#so i am condemned to watch from the sidelines until i have finished them and can form my own opinions about everything

[kylermalloy]

for the book asks:

2, 6, 25

!!!

2. Did you reread anything? What?

Yes! I love rereading stuff. I listened to some books I hadn’t read since high school English—A Separate Peace, The Great Gatsby. It’s amazing what you pick up from a book when you’re not 15 years old anymore.

Also infinitely more embarrassing but I am currently rereading SM’s The Host and getting just as into it as I was at age 17. Maybe more. So…yay?

6. Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

Sort of! I meant to do some of Jane Austen’s novels, since I’ve only read one (Pride and Prejudice) but ended up doing the Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice instead. What a tradeoff! Oh well. There’s always next year!

25. What reading goals do you have for next year?

No concrete goals per se, but I want to finish the Queen’s Thief series. I’ve only read the first two, and my library doesn’t have them in audiobook format. So I have to resort to…other means ;)

Book asks!

[gusu-emilu]

Cantatio: Chapter Five

Ship: Lan Zhan / Wei Ying (POV Lan Zhan)

Summary: Wei Ying gives Lan Zhan a scare while bringing pixiu statues to life in Song Lan’s class.

Cloud Recesses Academy AU, Rated T - read on AO3

Lan Wangji stumbled over as fast as he could. His legs were not working reliably after having so much of his energy drained. What kind of state would Wei Wuxian be in?

He squatted in front of Wei Wuxian, grasped his shoulders, and lifted his hunched torso. His eyes were shut tight, and his mouth hung open, threads of saliva beaded on his tongue.

Starting to panic, Lan Wangji pressed three fingers into a groove on Wei Wuxian’s neck. He was warm. His pulse was surprisingly fast.

“Wei Ying?”

< Ch. 4 | Ch. 6 > |  chapter list

Although Lan Wangji would be disinclined to downplay his uncle, he had to admit that Beings & Creatures with Song Lan was much more interesting than Trans-Himalayan poetry.

Half of the intrigue was the professor himself. He was terse in words and frosty in demeanor, but beneath his withdrawn temperament was a vast expanse of worldly knowledge and wary cynicism that did not seem like it belonged in a man who couldn’t have been much older than thirty. His presence reminded Lan Wangji of something he had felt before.

Lan Wangji had met many Lan Clan elders. Some members of this venerated generation carried a certain type of sorrow. It was a quiet, subdued torment that resided within their aged bones, dormant and faceless.

In a way he could not comprehend, Lan Wangji was able to sense its aura. It made him stiffen when those weathered men and women spoke his name or touched his shoulders, as he was overcome with a foreboding that if he got too close, their frail sorrow would sense his youth and vigor, and slink out of its hosts and into Lan Wangji’s heart to feed on his fresh life force.

These were people who were deeply haunted, but with the blessing of age had managed to integrate their pain into the sinews of their body until their identity and their misery were one and the same. It was not peace. It was the closest these people could come to peace.

Song Lan was one of these people.

Why did a man so young carry such a burden, and how had it settled into his being so seamlessly?

Yesterday evening, Lan Wangji had asked his brother what he knew about Song Lan. It was not much. Lan Xichen remarked that Song Lan had been a rogue cultivator for over a decade, traveling to places beyond the reach of the major cultivation sects. He went wherever the stars guided him, and he solved whatever problems crossed his path. There was no record of his deeds, only that his name roused a vaguely positive reaction if spoken in a few villages spread throughout the land. This was his first time teaching at the Cloud Recesses Academy after being personally invited by Lan Qiren.

Lan Wangji decided that he liked Song Lan, if only for the secrets he kept.

He liked Song Lan’s class, too. The other half of the intrigue of Beings & Creatures was the course material.

Instead of studying at desks in a classroom, the disciples kneeled in a clearing of soft trimmed grass that was a short walk away from the central buildings of the Cloud Recesses. The sunshine was warm upon their backs. In the distance were lush forests and misty mountains.

Song Lan parsed the disciples into groups of two, then took his time as he wordlessly weaved through the clearing and placed before each pair a greyish-brown stone carving of a pixiu, a magical hybrid that looked like a winged, serpentine roaring lion. The statues, small enough to hold in one hand, were old and beat-up. Each wide-mouthed pixiu carving sat atop a rectangular platform.

Lan Wangji’s pixiu sat in the grass between him and his partner Jin Zixuan. Jin Zixuan leaned forward and hesitantly inspected the pixiu.

“It’s kind of cute. In an ugly way,” he remarked.

Jin Zixuan’s head bobbed up and down every few moments to judge the statue from different angles, while Lan Wangji watched Song Lan in anticipation for their instructions.

Song Lan was in no hurry to start. His posture was stiff, but his jaw was soft and his eyelids were heavy. His robes were dark and held tints of cool blue and green. The diagonal golden hilt of a sword was visible behind his shoulder.

A cloud of reluctant curiosity formed over the disciples’ heads. They had no idea what the lesson would be about. In fact, their professor had not said anything other than ‘Do not touch these.’ He hadn’t even introduced himself yet.

On Lan Wangji’s left and two rows ahead, Wei Wuxian was partnered with Nie Huaisang. Both of them were crouched down in the grass to examine the backside of the pixiu.

“It really doesn’t have a butthole,” Wei Wuxian whispered.

“Why is that the first thing you look for?” Jiang Cheng said through clenched teeth from where he kneeled behind them.

Nie Huaisang laid a dainty finger on his chin. “Legend has it that after a pixiu pooped in the Jade Emperor’s palace, the Emperor spanked it so hard that its butt sealed up.”

Lan Wangji’s exhales became a bit more forceful.

Thankfully, the shameless disciples were silenced by a frigid glare from Song Lan.

A few paces away from the class, Jin Guangyao sat alone without a statue. Jin Guangyao may have been a cultivator and the son of the Jin Clan Leader, but he was also the son of a prostitute. He existed in a precarious state of ambiguity—privileged enough to attend classes with the best disciples in the land, but too unclean to fully participate in them. He was condemned to forever watch and serve from the sidelines, true greatness an arm’s length away but yet just beyond his fingertips.

At least, since Jin Guangshan had snatched him out of Nie Mingjue’s more humanizing tutelage the minute he showed promise. Lan Wangji understood why Nie Mingjue and Lan Xichen complained so much about their doe-eyed friend joining the Jin Clan.

Suddenly, Song Lan, too, looked at Jin Guangyao. A subtle, inscrutable line appeared in his brow. Otherwise, he did not move.

Jin Guangyao clutched his robes uncomfortably as the professor stared at him.

Another few seconds passed.

By now, the one disciple left to finish examining his pixiu and turn his attention to Song Lan was Wen Ning. Finally, Wen Ning looked up with his dark, expressive eyes.

It was only then that Song Lan spoke.

“Welcome. I am Song Lan of Baixue Temple. Today we will learn to animate guardian statues.”

This was a hefty topic for their first day. Normally a round of lively comments would spread through the crowd of disciples after such an announcement, but no one made a sound.

Song Lan was like a source of gravity, drawing in all attention, noise, even the bright sunlight, and weaving it into a narrow thread of solemnity.

“Someone please inform the class of what a guardian spirit is.”

It was Luo Qingyang who spoke.

“Guardian spirits are formed from the intentions of the founders of a location and are housed in statues. Although many buildings have statues to ward off evil, most contain weak guardian spirits, if any at all. Thousands of prayer intentions of great conviction are necessary to form a potent guardian spirit. Usually only palaces, temples, and important locations like the Cloud Recesses have strong ones.”

Lan Wangji visualized the architecture of the Cloud Recesses. Small statues of animals sat upon its roofs, and guardian lions stood before its most important buildings. They had protected the Cloud Recesses for countless years.

“Very good. Guardian statues take the form of a powerful animal,” Song Lan continued. “Pixiu are a common example. Females have two antlers and fight off evil. Males have a single antler and attract wealth.”

“Why is mine female?” Wen Chao grumbled as though it were a terrible affront.

The frost in Song Lan’s visage turned to sharp ice.

“Why not?”

Wen Chao looked up with a start. Apparently, he had not expected Song Lan to hear, despite how loud his voice was. But a jerk before an audience of one didn’t always have qualms about being a jerk before all.

“Because, I’m a man! Give this to the girls instead.”

In the row behind him, Wen Qing rolled her eyes.

Song Lan gave his head a slight tilt. “Please prove to me, with textualized arguments, that there is an established, well-researched reason this should be done.”

Wen Chao scowled as he processed Song Lan’s words. “I’m male! There’s nothing more to it.”

“Can you prove it to me with words alone, other than references to your sex?”

“…”

“Every object—people, plants, even these statues—contains a balance of feminine and masculine, of yin and yang. To waste one is to starve the soul. If you would like to starve, I will not stop you.”

A vein bulged in Wen Chao’s neck. He looked like he was about to jump up, but having been bested, he did not reply.

“This is basic cultivation theory that a child would know. Do not make me question the legitimacy of your attendance here.”

Several of the disciples grinned and nodded their heads in agreement with Song Lan. Then again, it was easy to agree when the object of ridicule was a Wen.

Song Lan’s eyes left Wen Chao, and darted to Jin Guangyao again. That same line appeared in his forehead. This time, Lan Wangji recognized discomfort in his expression.

Strange.

Then Song Lan continued the lesson as if it had never been interrupted.

“A guardian statue can be animated in a time of crisis by drawing on its guardian spirit. However, animating even a small statue will greatly drain a cultivator’s spiritual energy. Attempting to animate one that is too large can destroy a cultivator’s golden core.

“You are young. Although you possess golden cores, they are immature and fragile. Therefore, you will practice by animating statues that contain weak guardian spirits, and you will work in pairs to combine your energies into a single summoning.”

Jin Zixuan turned his head to exchange glances with Lan Wangji, but Lan Wangji did not return the gesture. He stared at the pixiu, studying its single-horned head. It was male.

“Place one hand upon the statue and reach out to the spirit. Be careful. Once you contact the spirit, it will immediately begin absorbing your energy.”

With two fingers, Lan Wangji gently touched the left side of the pixiu’s head. The stone was rough and slightly warm from sitting in the sun.

Once his partner was also touching the pixiu, Lan Wangji closed his eyes and reached out to probe the spiritual energy orbiting him. He felt Jin Zixuan’s nervousness and determination enter his mind and become one with his thoughts.

Then, something pounded over his spiritual essence like a wave crashing on the shore in ocean storm. Like the tide washing that wave back out to sea, it pulled Lan Wangji.

No, it tore at him—it was draining him, ripping his core from him—

In a second, the pain was gone. He panted for breath. His body felt much weaker, like he had swum a mile at full speed on an empty stomach: sleepy, aching, and dizzy, but still healthy.

He opened his eyes.

The little stone creature had jumped off its platform. Its movements were rigid and awkward, but it was very much alive. It radiated a joyful, protective energy.

The pixiu bounded over to Jin Zixuan, who had dropped onto his stomach in exhaustion. Jin Zixuan peered up at the pixiu that practically stood atop his nose. He gave a weary smile.

Male pixiu sought wealth. Jin Zixuan was undoubtedly the richest person in the vicinity. Their guardian statue performed its duty well.

Lan Wangji observed the progress of the disciples surrounding him. No one had animated their statues as quickly as them. Most sat with clenched muscles as they pressed their hands against the pixiu, trembling and whimpering as they fell deeper into the trance.

To his left, beads of sweat dripped down the side of Jiang Cheng’s face as he bared his teeth.

Two rows ahead, Wei Wuxian’s black curtain of hair was outlined in a fluffy yellow halo created by the sunlight. He was arguing with Nie Huaisang before a still-frozen statue.

“Just put your hand on it!”

“No, it’s too scary!”

“Come on, Huaisang, it’s not that bad!”

“It was going to pull out my golden core! I didn’t like it at all!”

Wei Wuxian grabbed Nie Huaisang by the folds of his robes below his neck and shook him back and forth. Nie Huaisang’s head lolled left and right.

“It couldn’t have felt much worse than this!” Wei Wuxian teased.

Nie Huaisang grinned and tried to peel away Wei Wuxian’s hand. “Yeah, you’re way worse, Wei-xiong! Way worse!”

Lan Wangji became bitterly aware of the lack of Wei Wuxian’s hand on his own robes.

Wait, what?

Ridiculous, Lan Wangji decided, directing his judgement at the two boys in front of him, and not at himself, because that thought had never happened.

Wei Wuxian released Nie Huaisang with a flimsy shove. “Aiya, you’re useless, Huaisang. I’ll just do it myself.”

“Wait, but didn’t the daozhang say that two people—”

“Shh! I just wanna try! It can’t be that hard!”

Lan Wangji clenched his jaw. He had experienced firsthand how much spiritual energy the pixiu had taken from his golden core, and it was already enough to warp his breaths and exhaust his muscles. That was with the help of Jin Zixuan, who was one of the most powerful disciples.

Where was Song Lan? Did he not see what was happening?

Wei Wuxian wasn’t foolish enough to try to animate the statue himself, was he?

The young cultivator wrapped a hand around the neck of the pixiu.

Apparently, he was.

“Wei Ying!”

Lan Wangji jumped to his feet and was about to rush forward to aid Wei Wuxian with what remained of his own spiritual energy, but it was over already.

Wei Wuxian’s back rounded, and his arms fell limp into the grass. The pixiu jolted awake and ran around in circles. It looked like it had gone berserk.

“…Wei-xiong?” Nie Huaisang said with an undertone of dread. He poked Wei Wuxian in the shoulder.

There was no reaction.

“W-W-Wei-xiong???”

Lan Wangji stumbled over as fast as he could. His legs were not working reliably after having so much of his energy drained. What kind of state would Wei Wuxian be in?

He squatted in front of Wei Wuxian, grasped his shoulders, and lifted his hunched torso. His eyes were shut tight, and his mouth hung open, threads of saliva beaded on his tongue.

Starting to panic, Lan Wangji pressed three fingers into a groove on Wei Wuxian’s neck. He was warm. His pulse was surprisingly fast.

“Wei Ying?”

“LAN ZHAN!”

With a sadistic grin, Wei Wuxian shot his eyes open and thrust his fingertips into Lan Wangji’s chest, sending a terrifying jolt through his entire body. Lan Wangji’s heart exploded with fright as he tumbled backwards with a gasp.

“Hahahahahahaha!”

Wei Wuxian doubled over in laughter. Nie Huaisang stared in surprise, then soon joined him in the hilarity.

Song Lan appeared over their shoulders, his expression unamused.

“Compose yourselves. This is not a game,” he said. Then he slinked away to a different pair, leaving as abruptly as he came.

Lan Wangji’s tired, sluggish mind was still processing what happened. His fingers curled into his palms, and soon his fists shook with anger. His ears burned red.

“Wei Wuxian.”

“Ahahaha, so once I’m awake, it’s not Wei Ying anymore? Hahahaha! I’m so hurt, Lan Zhan! Maybe I should just stay asleep! Hahahaha!”

Wei Wuxian’s obnoxious demeanor was not even slightly subdued. He didn’t seem to have lost any energy to the pixiu that scampered away into the forest.

“How…How…”

“How did I do it?” Wei Wuxian said with a smirk. He crossed his legs and leaned forward, resting his chin in his hand in one swift, cocky motion.

“Remind me later. I’ll tell you during detention. You have the privilege of supervising me, right?”

Lan Wangji staggered to his feet and glowered down at Wei Wuxian.

“Do not speak to me again.”

* * *

The rest of Song Lan’s class was a blur fringed with silent fury. Lan Wangji’s brain was dominated by a single thought: He did not like Wei Wuxian. At all.

How had he animated the guardian statue by himself without losing energy? Had he and Nie Huaisang conspired just to play a joke on him?

However, he did not want to hear whatever explanation Wei Wuxian planned to offer later. He had heard his distasteful voice enough.

It took until Song Lan dismissed the disciples for Lan Wangji to fully organize his haywire emotions and regain his composure. It had not helped that his body had been exhausted for most of class. But at last, he felt strength and confidence return to his limbs, and his familiar unfaltering tranquility returned to his mind.

For the most part.

Then he remembered—Wen Qing. They needed to discuss the closet portal.

Lan Wangji barely had the chance to look around for the young medical student when she popped up at his side of her own accord.

She pointed an accusatory finger at his chest. “You will not speak a word to anyone about what you saw last night.”

Her brow was stern and authoritative, her eyes hawklike.

This was not a good start to the conversation.

* * *

* * *

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this chapter, you can be a supportive sibling like Jiang Yanli by liking, reblogging, and visiting me on AO3! New chapters posted every Monday on AO3 and Tuesday on Tumblr.

Ch. 6 > |  chapter list

[fabulousquel]

GreedFall: Tips + My Review

So I picked up this game out of curiosity because I’m currently working on an RPG style historical fantasy that draws inspiration from a similar time period. I wanted to see how someone else handled the ‘flintlock’ genre and told a story with elements of this era. I am in no means a pro game reviewer but I completed the entire game yesterday and I have a lot I want to say.

There are some spoilers in this, so if you’d like to avoid reading them, don’t read the "Story” section. 

Tips:

Do your companion quests early and as soon as they pop up. There are some incredible lore bits and development of your character as well as your companions within them. Also if you sideline a companion for too long, they might leave your party in ways that might surprise or unsurprise you.

Certain dialog options will give you more quest content. For example, you’ve caught a criminal and you are given the choice to kill them on the spot, or capture them for trial. If you kill them, your quest line ends there. If you decide to trial them, another quest line opens up and you get a lot more flavor.

You can essentially just follow the main quest line if you want to speed-finish the game, but you lose a lot of context and additional dialog options if you do so. You will also wind up fighting the final boss at a much lower level, thus making the fight harder, but not impossible. They may have made this an option for people coming back wanting a challenge or to try a different build. But in my opinion, they should’ve made the side quests a mandatory thing because it’s a huge disservice to the context of the main story without them.

Don’t forget to give your companions gear upgrades- especially if you’re playing on more challenging modes.

If you want to avoid bloodshed and sneak into a camp, make sure you put on a chest piece of that faction. 

Put some skill points into Stasis no matter what build you roll with.

The Soundtrack:

It’s amazing. The snare drums going off in combat sequences create a very distinct and powerful mood. The zone music is very well orchestrated. It’s now up on spotify as well! 

Combat & Talents:

Of the RPGs I’ve played, this most reminded me of a combination of Red Dead Redemption, Final Fantasy with the option to semi-turn style with spells & traps, and a very versatile talent tree system that is really...fun. It’s the first time in a while that I felt I could make an effective solid build and playstyle around what I wanted to do most. Combat takes getting used to but I set up my keybinds to be a lot like ESO and I adapted very quickly. I went shortsword / gun tactical and it was immensely satisfying. 

The Story:

[SPOILS AHEAD]

The difference between historical fiction and historical fantasy is that a historical fantasy does not seek to retell history accurately, but rather take inspiration from it. How heavy this inspiration goes varies from story to story. This is how I approached interpreting the story, even in its very realistic parts. As I played through, there were several themes that became very clear to me. Keep in mind that I played through the game with De Sarde taking the Neutral Good alignment choice in most dialog options. 

The Elephant in the Room: Colonialism. This is one of the big criticisms I see with the game, and truth be told, it is a point of criticism for myself. The game treats the colonizing factions exactly like colonizers of real history, and it’s a subject that still rightfully touches nerves. One faction seeks to profit, another nation seeks to convert, and another seeks to experiment on. While there are subgroups of these factions that are more extreme than their leadership- the leadership seems complacent about it until condemning evidence is brought up. While extremely problematic this is, it is very true to what has happened in history surrounding colonialism, and places you in one uncomfortable situation after another in a frighteningly realistic way. It makes your decisions as De Sarde in some instances painful but it can be satisfying to see how your actions affect justice in these matters.

Some critics have said that De Sarde’s choices do not always condemn truly objectionable events enough. I agree that more depth could have been added. But in my playthrough, De Sarde’s role starts out as a truly neutral party looking for truths, and they gradually became more adamant on stances as the game progressed. By the end, my De Sarde was about to 1v1 Theleme, and drag out the Bridge Alliance governor. So I am unsure if this is a perspective coming from those who haven’t completed the game in its entirety with all side quests which influence reputations more & seem to flesh out more dialog options. 

Humanity Has a Sickness This was written both physically and metaphorically in how humans are as susceptible to committing atrocities as they are to growing ill. Throughout the story as De Sarde, you play almost a detective in uncovering the truth about the people you were raised to believe were benevolent. De Sarde does not take these accusations of corruption lightly, but they also treat it very seriously. Piece by piece, De Sarde learns more about each factions true intentions, and the lies, corruption and greed that intertwine. But at the same time, the story attempts to reveal the potential for all people to ‘do better’ and change- and some of this is seen when you use De Sarde’s charisma + intuition dialog options. This theme especially became clear in the arc when De Sarde finally gets to speak to the god of the island, En on mil Frichtimen, who expresses to him that the malicor (sickness) is a result of them poisoning their own land with their lack of care or concern for it.  En on mil Frichtimen urges that the colonists need to listen and learn from the Islanders’ ways if they wish to heal the sickness.

Where to Draw the Line at “For The Greater Good” I feel like this is a theme that crops up with any story involving Utopian ideas. GreedFall does a good job of backing up each faction’s actions with their point of view, whether it is morally misguided or not. This truly emphasizes the human element in the mix, underlining that no perspective comes without its flaws. As De Sarde, one thing you are constantly faced with as a detective is defining a line of where something has gone too far. It is sobering and somewhat frustrating to watch factions step over a line that could have easily remained morally sound. But it is also equally satisfying to see how much influence you can have in swaying others to make a different choice. This theme becomes the summit of De Sarde’s character progression when he is forced to make the choice of taking your dear cousin, Constantin, out of power, or joining him. And when you’ve done all the side quests there are in the game, the decision becomes far more meaningful than this just being the final boss fight.

This theme also seems to come full circle by the end of Petrus’s quest line, when you discover your true origin- how your mother was kidnapped from the island in a rash attempt to bring a healer to the continent. This realization that everything you’ve known has been a lie and kept secret from you...all for the “greater good”. 

Things I Liked:

I appreciated how much love and care went into the worldbuilding- especially with the native Islanders. From what I understand, a linguist was hired to write a language for them that was a mash-up of Flemish, Breton, Gaelic and Irish. I appreciated that they brought forth inspiration from the Gauls and Celtic nations of the Iron Age in Western Europe before they were subjected to Christian Missionary activity.

The art & atmosphere was amazing. While there are a few clipping issues with hair, even big AAA games have them. The level of detail put into the game art wise is just very visually pleasing.

The devs did a good job in making a fantasy world that was LGBTQ+ friendly, and giving us diverse character customization. Anyone from any faction had a diverse set of features.

Things I am Critical of:

While I understand that there is a point of growth to watch De Sarde go from neutral to invested in a cause, I really do think they should have been given less complacent responses earlier in the game. I understand limitations but I don’t think it helped with handling colonialism in a truly neutral way.

I wish you could start the game as someone from a faction of your choice, rather than only the Merchant Congregation, especially considering how your origin is written.

IT’S DEPRESSING. A lot of the game is depressing... which maybe makes all the little things you do that shine some shred of goodness still in humanity all the brighter. But it definitely hurt my soul in places and back to point #1, I wish I could have been more aggressive with De Sarde earlier in the game.

Recycled assets: there were quite a few of them- mostly noticeable with buildings in the main cities, which is probably what marks the difference between an AAA game and a more independent studio.

Potential Triggers:

There’s a lot of heavy subjects in this game including religious abuse, manipulation, some body horror (though it’s not super grotesque), one instance of suicide that I know of, xenophobia, and general violence. 

Features I Wish it Had:

You can’t ‘jump’...but you don’t really need to. I still wish I could though.

For all this beautiful scenery, I wish they gave us better screenshot taking options.

Different fights for the different Coin Arenas and a meta achievement for completing all of them.

I wish I could play it with friends.

More armor options!

I wish the companions had better and more in-depth romance options. They fall a little flat in diversity of personalities.

Final Thoughts:

I personally enjoy diving into stories that we should be morally critical of, and I like it for what it reveals in the best and worst of humanity. Colonialism has done and continues to do irreversible damage to peace and prosperity among people and nations in real life. Spiders picked a topic that nearly everyone has been affected by in one way or another and it’s understandably a heated subject. Some folks do not want to dive into such deep subjects, just as there’s some stories I cannot stomach comfortably. So I respect and understand that.

Overall, GreedFall exceeded my expectations but there’s definitely some hiccups. It’s a fun game if you’re into a detective-style RPG, political intrigue, history, and interested in exploring this sort of setting. While I think the story could have been written better in places, I was satisfied with the outcomes I triggered, even if that satisfaction took a very slow build up to. It left me feeling hopeful? That perhaps people still have a chance at treating each other better than they do.

[athyriiium]

Okay, I’m back at it again with another long ass, symbolism heavy theory. I would heavily suggest reading my other theory here before you read this one since I will be referencing that one often in this. There’s a tl;dr at the bottom fyi!

To begin, the symbolism and art shown in Blood, Sweat, and Tears (BST) is very religion heavy. It is to be expected when pulling from work from the 17-18th centuries. I’ve seen some people theorize that Jin is the one behind all the “evil” the boys have done in RUN and I Need U (INU). I agree with this, though I don’t think he is necessarily evil, but more of a tempter.

In my previous theory, I discussed how I believed Jin to be Sinclair and Tae to be Demian, acting as a force to influence Sinclair as a mentor. I still believe that to be true. Each boy has his own storyline that is tied back to Jin, including Tae, but it’s a little confusing.

Let me backtrack: When Jin kisses the statue like Sinclair kisses Demian, they become one. Sinclair talks about not being able to see Demian anymore and realizes Demian was just a part of himself. So the metaphorical Tae that I spoke about previously is a part of Jin. Jin has realized himself fully and has accepted both the light and darkness in his life.

I also heavily discussed the concept of duality in my last post. There is the “other world” as Sinclair often mentions it which is the darker side of the world, which also means there is a light side of the world. This is a limited, binary viewpoint though. And the Spring Day mv told us there is more to the world than that through the usage of “The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas” (short story) and “Snowpiercer” (film). Both stories show there are sides of gray in life. In the Omelas story, everyone is happy enjoying life at the expense of a miserable child. The knowledge of the child gets out and there are people who live that can’t live a life of blind happiness at the expense of others. BTS are the ones who walk away from the feeling of blindness and absolute happiness.

Snowpiercer is a film that depicts an apocalyptic world in which the last surviving humans live on a train. It is best known for its blatant ridicule of the class system but also depicts two sides of life. The tail end or back end of the train is where the poor are, living in oppressed squalor while the head of the train lives in complete luxury. But, both ends of the train are blind to the truth. They accept the train as the world, it’s safety and warmth. The middle of the train is the only place with windows where you can see out of the train. The middle of the train people, or middle class, are the ones who are educated with propaganda instructing them that the train is the world. BTS are those of the middle class, but also the two middle-class people who eventually escape the train. They sit and accept the truth that they are told until they see the colors of gray, or the world around them, and eventually leave the train.

Now you might be asking what about the two Jungkooks? That’s where the concept of duality comes in. the train JK sees the Omelas JK and that’s the spark to leave. Train JK is the passive one who accepts the truth, while Omelas JK is the boy who defies what is given to him. This is the spark to leave the train and explore the outside world. But I digress. Let me get back to the JPN BST mv.

The concept of this passive vs active duality is also seen in Jin especially in the newest JPN BST mv. Jin has been seen very passive around the boys, never really joining in on the fun just standing on the sidelines and filming. There is plenty of evidence out there, but if you want specifics let me know.

The Jin in the JPN BST mv, is not like that at all. He seems to play an active, almost antagonistic role. So, as I said there is lots of religious symbolism in the BST mvs and to explain what I think happens in the JPN ver I have to use some material from the KOR ver.

So I believe Jin is the tempter, acting as the snake (and depending on who you talk to, indirectly the Devil) in the story of Adam and Eve. After going back to watch the KOR BST it makes more sense since Jin was shown while Namjoon quoted the Demian line about Demian being a tempter. This may seem far-fetched but hear me out.

Jimin, who was seated on Jin’s left in the KOR ver BST table scene, is often showed with apples. It is seen in the JPN BST, KOR BST, and Jimin’s short film. Apples, in the biblical sense, are tied to Adam and Eve. To briefly recap the story, Adam and Eve were the first humans created. They were allowed to eat, use, and generally do anything in the Garden of Eden except eat from the Tree of Knowledge. A serpent tempts and eventually convinces her to do so to “open her eyes” to be like “God, knowing all good and evil”. After she eats the fruit, she shares with Adam and both are condemned by God and sent out of the Garden of Eden.

I didn’t put this together until seeing Jimin finally eat the apple in the JPN BST. He’s just been holding it or looking at it up until now like he was tempted. Jimin, also being on Jin’s left, is important. The left side in many people who believe in the bible is associated with Satan/the Devil. I’m not saying Jin is the devil. Some people believe the snake was Satan in disguise, but I think it’s more of a vector of temptation sent to taint God’s creations. But this isn’t the time for bible debate.

It also fits because the serpent implies that Eve’s eyes have been closed. Jimin is also often seen with a blindfold or having his vision blocked, by a certain someone (Yoongi). I thought previously that Jimin was turning a blind eye to something, ignoring something that was causing him pain, and I do still believe that, but I also think it has another meaning. If the serpent convinced Eve that she was blind, that she couldn’t see everything, then wouldn’t she think of herself as blindfolded? Then wouldn’t the one blindfolding her, be God? Just as I am not saying Jin is the Devil, I don’t think Yoongi is God. He is symbolic of him. Yoongi serves as a protection/barricade between Jimin and Jin. He doesn’t want Jimin to follow Jin into darkness. That’s why we see two Jimin’s. The one Yoongi protects, and the one that follows Jin into darkness.

So if Yoongi is symbolic of God, how come he fights Kookie in RUN? Many times in the bible, God is shown, for lack of a better term, a practitioner of tough love. See Noah’s ark for example, where floods come and kill many people and animals except for the one’s on Noah’s ark besides the people had lost the way of God. The people killed were the descendants of Adam and Eve, who I believe are the other boys since Jimin and Tae were the first tempted.

So if Jimin is symbolic of Eve, Yoongi of God, and Jin of the Devil, then who is Adam? At first, I thought it was Hobi since he is OFTEN seen with Jimin, but I have Hobi has something else going on I will get to soon. So that lead me to Tae. We see Tae struggling with temptation/sin often. The act of graffiti and an insane amount of suicide imagery associated with him in HYYH is too overwhelming.

Tae sits on the right of Jin in the KOR BST mv. If the left is associated with evil, then the right is associated with good. Tae was “good” which is why there is so much angelic symbolism near him. But, he was tempted, probably by Jimin since he is symbolic of Eve and Eve is the one who gives Adam the fruit to eat.

Jin, could also have been the one to tempt Tae and the other boys since in the KOR BST all the boys are shown around a table with no real food besides apples in front of them. So, Tae and Jimin are the first ones tempted.

Now, when Adam and eve were cast out of the Garden of Eden, they could no longer understand the word of God, since they were no longer his children. So this leads me to believe that nothing heavenly could help either of them. Which is where Hobi and Namjoon come in.

I’ll start with Namjoon, since his story is somewhat laid out already. Many times Namjoon is shown running to a telephone booth and many people assume it’s because Tae is calling based off evidence from Namjoon and Tae’s films. But, Namjoon is never able to reach the phone or get into the booth. So, since Namjoon isn’t tempted YET, he is still considered heavenly, therefore, he can never help Tae.

Namjoon is eventually tempted and falls into alcohol, specifically absinthe. Absinthe is portrayed as an addictive, alcoholic hallucinogen. So he becomes addicted to drinking the beverage and eventually forces Jungkook to drink it (seen in the JPN BST mv). But, I don’t think Namjoon falls as deeply into temptation as Tae does. He learns to accept it. Namjoon is shown around a lot of mirrors either obscuring his reflection (JPN INU) or shattering the glass (Reflection). But, in JPN BST he is shown looking directly into his reflection. He’s learned to accept temptation as a part of himself. Reflections are often symbolic of showing one's true self which is why we say Jin’s reflection crack in KOR BST bc he hasn’t accepted his whole self (passive and active).

Before I get to Hobi, I’m going to finish Jungkook’s story. Before, I wasn’t sure where Kookie sat in the Demian/Sinclair story. I believed he was “Beatrice” but since he is often on the outskirts dipping his toes in good and evil I think he is symbolic of Abraxus. We don’t know who convinced the boys to leave Omelas, but from what I discussed earlier, it was most likely Kookie who convinced the boys to leave the train in Spring Day. He also tries to help Yoongi in RUN, who is struggling with his own problems. This is the good Kookie dabbles in. The bad is all the new stuff we saw in the JPN BST mv: the hallucinations and fighting off Yoongi who is trying to help him. Also, depending on what theory you believe, the shooting of the other boys in Not Today.

Now last but not least, Hobi. I think Hobi was once tempted, proven by the abuse of pills. But rather than accept temptation, he rejects it and fights it. This is seen by the throwing away of his pills, twice now. We also often see Hobi pulling a bow and arrow and now a dart on those tempted, usually Tae. Now, I believe Tae has fallen deepest into temptation and Hobi mourns the loss of his friends' purity, shown by the Pieta in KOR BST. He takes on the biggest challenge first, Tae. Which is why we see him throwing or going to throw the dart at Tae in JPN BST and pull the bow at Tae in KOR BST. Hobi is the descendant that God spoke of when cursing the serpent. God said that Eve’s descendant will bruise his foot by smashing the head of the snake. Basically, he will have to sacrifice something to get rid of the tempting serpent.

Hobi is also shown dancing under the fresco painted on St. Nicholas’ ceiling painted by Guilio Quaglio. I can't find a lot of info on the painting but it looks like a depiction of a world of light or heaven? So it looks like Hobi is reaching for salvation, but he isn’t the only one. Jimin is too.

Jimin, aka Eve, has realized what he has done wrong and has suffered for it. She lost her son Abel at the hands of her son Cain and was placed with pain after she was cast out of the Garden of Eden. This is why we see Jimin suffering/being uncomfortable so much while in water. Water is symbolic of purification, so Jimin is repenting for his wrongdoings but is also suffering because of the temptation he gave into.

We also see Jin circa INU era twice in this mv. Once in the bed of the truck, lying similarly to how he is lying in the bed in INU. In INU lilies are very present. They are also present in BST. Lilies symbolize innocence after death. Passive Jin wants to be innocent after he dies but is prevented from that because of tempter!Jin. This is why the lily petals are burned; all hope of innocence after death is gone. I believe both Jin’s are aware of each other having met in the Awake film, but since tempter Jin is the stronger personality, he has prevented watcher Jin from moving on. Which is why he is still interacting with the boys in the INU era but only passively.

The scene at the end of the mv is one of the first setups to Jin’s temptation of Namjoon. We see the effects in the INU era.

TL;DR: as seen in INU there are two sides to youth: the dark and light. This is further expressed in RUN and BST (both versions). Each boy has a doppelganger, opposite from what they are typically shown to be. Jin’s doppelganger, the tempter, has tempted the boys to do things they shouldn’t seen in RUN and INU. Hobi, the savior, is trying to fight Jin’s hold on the boys.