#so he’ll eat like 4-6 eggs in one go. any form

[digitaldiseas3]

i’m so obsessed with my ocs except i haven’t actually developed their universe At All so i have to figure out what is even happening around them and not just like. what they would eat for breakfast

[teawithkpop]

[M] - PhysCom - Pt 7

pt 1 - pt 2 - pt 3 - bc 1 - pt 4 - pt 5 - pt 6 - pt 7

Pairing: BTS - OT7 x Reader

Rating: Mature [18+]

Length: 5.4k words

Genre: PhysCom AU - smut with dashes of angst, and a shitload of romance and complicated feelings,, uhuhu (porn with plot??)

Warnings: swearing, a lot of emotional turmoil, talk of pregnancy scares (birth control, contraceptives, etc.), implied discrimination towards sex workers (not by any of the boys dw), mentions of sexual acts

slowly hands you a cake that says "I haven't updated this fic in 14 months and I don't know when the next part is coming but here's an update thanks for being patient" in comic sans

-------

The rush to the hospital goes by in a blur of tears and shouting and panic and questions that you can't bring yourself to answer. The only constant is Min Yoongi's hand, firmly locked in your own throughout the ordeal, tethering you to reality.

You now sit in a private room on a sterile medical table and wait to be seen, too numb inside to feel the sting of the cold metal as it cuts into the backs of your thighs. Yoongi stands beside you, still holding your hand, his fingers are laced through yours and squeezing as if it could sap away the fear that eats away your insides, leaving you hollow and empty.

"It'll be alright. Don't worry about a damn thing, okay?" He shifts his weight anxiously, betraying his own underlying worries.

You barely remember him throwing his jacket over you before being rushed out of the house, and you don't feel deserving of the modest coverage. Though the leather is worn and soft against your skin, all you can feel is the harsh metallic zipper, scratching at your chest as though reminding you of your wrongdoings.

"Yoongi…" you start to say, but he cuts you off, his voice a hoarse whisper.

"Don't you fucking dare. Don't apologize."

You feel tears well up in your eyes. Your chest grows tight with the words he's forbidden you to say.

"I've already called Namjoon, it'll all be fine. Don't worry." He works his jaw and rubs your hand with surprising tenderness, glancing to the little window in the door every other second.

He's been assuring you with those same words for the past half hour, but it feels like it's been an eternity. As you glance at the clock on the wall, watching the hands tick by, you imagine a scene like that of a health documentary. Tiny sperm, swimming up your insides��� fertilizing your previously dormant eggs.

Fuck. You've fucked up.

You might be pregnant with Min Yoongi's child. Your Opticon birth control implant could send you into toxic shock at any moment.

You don't see how things can get much worse than this.

The door finally opens, and what appears to be a nurse steps inside. She holds a clipboard, and examines it while she lets the door close behind her. "Let's see now, Miss..." Her shoulders slump marginally as her eyes reach your name. "Oh, right. The PhysCom."

You don't have the energy to ignore the change in her tone from friendly to disinterested, and simply nod. However, you feel Yoongi stiffen beside you.

The nurse lets out a brief sigh and dons a professional expression. "So, what appears to be the problem?" She directs the question to Yoongi.

"We think her birth control implant isn't working." Yoongi explains, his eyes darting furtively between you and the nurse. "She, um… she reached orgasm."

You flush at the memory, ashamed of your failure to adhere to even the most basic of rules set before you.

The nurse makes a noncommittal noise and jots something down. "Says here it’s an Opticon. And you didn't turn it off, sir?"

He shakes his head.

The nurse touches the end of her pen to her mouth, a note of sympathy forming in her eyes. Not for you, but for Yoongi. "How long have you had her?"

"Excuse me?" Yoongi raises an eyebrow.

The nurse tucks the clipboard under her arm, giving him a weary, patient smile. “With PhysComs, we have a list of probable scenarios we’re supposed to check for, to better inform the doctor of the situation, and speed along the treatment process.”

She barely spares you a glance before returning her attention to Yoongi, her voice lowered just a fraction. “It’s not uncommon for newly hired female PhysComs to try and… well, intentionally get pregnant from their clients. Especially if those clients have any amount of wealth or status.”

Yoongi seems lost for words.

She nods as if to agree with his surprise. “It’s some psychosis associated with the job,” she says with a shrug, then straightens her posture once more. “So has she been acting strangely at all? What are her symptoms?”

Your ears burn a bit at being talked about like you’re not in the room, but this isn’t the first time you’ve been in such a position. Oftentimes checkups during training were the same way, the physicians would speak exclusively among themselves and Madame while they examined every inch of you, inside and out.

Yoongi, however, is not used to such an experience.

“Why don’t you ask her yourself?” He says, in a voice much calmer than you would have expected. But one glance at his face tells you all you need to know. His eyes are burning like hot coals. Molten and dangerous.

The nurse doesn’t pick up on his irritation, and busily flips through the pages on her clipboard. “I need reliable information, sir. If you please,” she prompts him.

You can feel Yoongi’s hand clench around yours, and you turn to quiet him.

“It’s okay,” you murmur, hoping to reassure him enough so he’ll talk to her, but he stands his ground, his eyes glued on the nurse.

“Get out,” Yoongi says.

The nurse does a double take. “Excuse me, sir?”

“I said get the fuck out of here.” He points to the door. “Send us someone who will actually help.”

She fumes silently for a moment, but decides not to argue with him, and heads for the door in a huff.

Yoongi scoffs as you two are left alone once more. “What the fuck kind of bedside manner was that supposed to be?” He mutters, staring at the door.

“It’s okay.” You place a hand on his arm.

“No, it’s not.” He’s adamant, and you sigh wearily. How do you explain that this is only what can be expected?

You pick out a few haphazard words from the maelstrom in your brain, too tired to find the best phrasing. “Medical personnel… they don’t really get it.”

“Get what?” He asks, turning to you in outrage. “Being a fucking decent human being?”

You flinch, withdrawing your hand. You’re too tired to try and get your point across. But he notices you wilt and immediately comes closer, lowering his voice and placing both his hands on your arms. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, the edge of anger fading away to gentleness. Kindness. “What do you mean?”

You sigh, looking off to the side. You don’t deserve to have him look at you like that.

You carefully remove his hands, trying to maintain some semblance of a professional distance, even in the face of disaster. “Most hospitals don’t look favorably at PhysComs. We were given a few lectures about it in training. We use up their resources and time that could instead be given to patients who didn’t willingly put themselves at risk.”

You remember how your fellow trainees had reacted after those discussions. Many of them found the treatment to be unfair, but you yourself felt that, in a way, the medical field’s viewpoint was reasonable. Your choices are what landed you here.

“What the- what are you talking about?” He huffs, still seemingly in the dark. “You didn’t ask for this… this scare. It wasn’t your fault.” He tries to meet your eyes, but your gaze is fixed firmly to the linoleum floor.

A mirthless smile paints your lips. “But I chose this life. And these risks along with it.”

Before he can question you further, the door bursts open and Kim Namjoon enters the room, both his dress shirt and his hair are rumpled, and his eyes are frantic. “Sweetheart?” He rushes to your side and crushes you in a hug. “Are you alright?”

You hear Yoongi let out a breath of relief. “She’s okay, for the moment.”

Something about the way Namjoon holds you feels like a lamp being held against your cold skin. You’re too damp inside to light a flame yourself, but his own body warms you from the outside in the meantime. You want to let yourself enjoy it, but the memory of your unresolved questions leaves you limp in his arms, filled with nothing but misery and confusion.

He pulls back after a moment, checking you over for signs of injury. His eyes are wide with concern. “What happened? Tell me everything.”

A flare of shame rises up in you at the notion of telling Namjoon about your rule-breaking and everything that occured since this morning.

Thankfully, Yoongi seems to sense your hesitance, and he fills in most of the pieces for Namjoon. Namjoon’s expression remains stoic as Yoongi recounts what happened - you being brought home unconcious, seducing Yoongi - up until the mention of your orgasm. Namjoon’s jaw slackens slightly at this, and his eyes scan your face, searching for something.

It’s at this moment that the doctor walks in, a different nurse at his side. He’s a slightly older man, a few wrinkles creasing his brow, and a smile that appears kind until it lands on you. His face is then tinged with that same indifference that most medical professionals give you.

You wish it was your usual physician, but since this was an emergency, you didn’t have time to take the trip to your usual practice. Whatever hospital is nearest, that’s what Yoongi had told the driver.

The man turns to Namjoon, who arguably commands more presence than Yoongi, and the kindness returns. “Sorry for the delay. Busy night. From what I understand, your PhysCom has malfunctioned, is that correct?”

“Her Opticon malfunctioned, yes.” Namjoon corrects him. His diplomatic tendencies are a blessing right now. You just want to know if you’re pregnant or not. You want to know if you’re losing your job. You want to go home.

The doctor runs a few physical tests on you, feeling your breasts, peering down your throat, and examining your vaginal canal, checking for any other symptoms of malfunction from your Opticon. “All’s well so far.” He says, pulling his forefingers out of you, snapping off his gloves, and disposing of them. “May I take a look at the ComGear?”

You feel a flash of panic, waking you out of your stupor. Fuck, was it still in the group chat? You pull out the slim device, heart hammering as you check. Nope. Just settings. Thank god.

You hand it over, and then remember with a looming feeling of dread exactly why it might have been left on the settings page...

“You do so much for us, jagiya.” Taehyung keeps his hands braced on your arms, his thumb rubbing gently against your skin. “You’re always there for us. Always giving… Now it’s time for you to receive.”

“I’m sorry! It’s my fault-” Jimin’s eyes fall to your compromising position, Yoongi’s dick still out, your leaking core exposed, and claps a hand over his mouth. He looks like he might cry. “Oh no...”

The pieces fall into place, and there’s no doubt in your mind. They must have switched it off.

But why? Why, why, why…?

The doctor - you’re too frazzled to read his nametag - pulls out a pair of reading glasses and takes a look at your ComGear, poking around the device with his pointer finger. “Hm. Strange.” He squints. “The Opticon does appear to be switched off.”

Namjoon blinks. “That’s impossible.”

“I’m afraid that’s the case.” The doctor shows him the setting, the toggle very much in the off position. Namjoon takes the device and looks at it in shock.

The doctor coughs. “I know that, um… for some individuals, the temptation and the… risk associated with no protection during intercourse can be sexually arousing. It’s not the first time we’ve gotten a case like this.”

He removes his glasses, folding them back into his pocket. “However, I would remind you and anyone else who uses this one’s services that although Physical Companions may be virtually expendable, it can become quite expensive for your own sake to impregnate them on a whim, using and discarding them, what with the standard fees for breaching their contract and-”

“Thank you, Doctor.” Namjoon interrupts him, and you notice the iron grip he now has on Yoongi’s arm. Likely the only thing restraining him from throwing a punch. “We’ll be more careful.” Namjoon glances at you, confusion making a little crease between his brows. “Is there some sort of morning after pill she can take, or…?”

“I’m afraid the lingering effects of the Opticon implant render any outside hormone blockers ineffective.” The doctor says, his smile turning thin. “It’s a bit of a blessing and a curse. The hormone production and ovulation suppressant in the Opticon normally make the chance of fertilization zero percent while in use. After it’s switched off, chances are still fairly low at 30 percent, for up to 24 hours. But the chances of fertilization after taking a morning after pill are significantly lower than that, at only five percent.”

He shrugs. “We’ll just have to wait and see. Chances are, your PhysCom will be right as rain and ready to pleasure clients again in about a week.”

A week.

First a week of suspension on Namjoon’s terms… Now it’s on medical advisement.

“A week? What should we do until then?” Namjoon voices your very thoughts, Yoongi seething silently beside him.

“Well, we won’t have any results until three to five days from now.” The man clarifies. “But I highly recommend you leave the implant switched off and keep her on traditional contraceptives until we know for sure. I strongly recommend utilizing other PhysComs in the meantime, just to be safe.”

You’re finished.

The doctor hands Namjoon a paper bag, most likely containing birth control pills and condoms. “She may be somewhat volatile for the next few days. You can bring her in for another checkup in a week.”

You’re weak.

“Thank you.”

You’re numb.

-------

It was a silent car ride back to the house, and as Namjoon helps you step out of the vehicle, one hand holding yours for stability while the other rests on your lower back, you can’t help feeling utterly useless. Detached from your surroundings.

What’s the point of any of this now? There’s no way they’ll want to use you until this is resolved. You’re of no use to them as a sex toy until at least a week from now, and by then it’ll be far too late to earn their favor back.

“We need to have a meeting. Call the others into the living room.” Namjoon speaks to Yoongi in an undertone, and you feel a small ache of hope. Maybe things will work out if everyone just talks to each other.

But when you enter the house and Namjoon begins to steer you upstairs, you finally find your voice.

“No.” You resist against him, turning around at the base of the stairs. “No, I want to be part of the meeting.”

The surprise quickly fades from his face, instead turning to concern. “You need to rest."

Something about the look on his face, about being told yet again through his actions that this doesn’t concern you, it causes something inside you to snap, your apathy vanishing in the wake of this new beast beginning to rear its ugly head within you.

Your throat closes up and a scream erupts from your aching chest. "You don't know what I need!"

Namjoon matches your desperation with an infuriatingly patient look of sympathy. He approaches you, his hand outstretched, but you stagger back away from him. He smiles sadly and drops his hand. "Stay here. It's what's best for you."

What's best for you.

The words throb in your mind, like the memory of an old wound. They bounce listlessly off the walls of your grandiose prison long after Namjoon shuts the door, sealing you away again.

You don't know what comes over you as you see visions of launching yourself at the door, pounding and scratching at the wood like a wild animal.

You could just open the door and follow him downstairs. Some part of you does register that.

But you want them to hear you. You want them to hear you rip your throat raw as you exorcise your demons.

You blink and you're standing still.

You haven't moved.

Your spacious room feels stifling. Like the walls are closing in on you, suffocating you.

Silken ropes sway in the dusk, catching your eye from beyond the balcony window. Your escape route from earlier that day.

You don't think twice before stuffing a few meager belongings into the long forgotten backpack kicked beneath your bed.

You need to leave this place.

You can't stay here.

-------

It had started drizzling not long after you left the house, and even now as you sit on the damp curbside, waiting for the next bus to take you far away from this place, it strikes you as funny, in a way, that the weather is crying for you, since you can't muster any tears of your own.

It's cold and misty, a foreboding atmosphere, by all accounts. It makes you question if what you're about to do is the right call.

But you shut down the arguments in your head as quickly as they appear.

Second guessing was what had gotten you into this situation. You need to follow your instincts.

And your instincts are telling you to flee.

It won't be so bad, you try to convince yourself. After the first night on the road, you'll eventually find a new town, a new home, a new place for yourself in this fucked up world. You've done it before, you can do it again.

You're considering suitable aliases for your new persona, when you sense another person approaching, their shoes tramping through the wet grass.

You don't look up at them, hoping they'll pass by and leave you alone. But they come to a stop beside you.

You keep your gaze on the road, droplets rippling the puddled potholes.

Then the stranger goes to sit on the curb too, and you can't help but look at them.

You'd recognize those lips anywhere, even beneath a baggy hooded sweatshirt.

"It's a bit late to run errands, don't you think?" Seokjin says, pulling his sleeves down to keep out the chill as he perches beside you.

He glances at you, then looks ahead at the road, the same way you were. You return your gaze forward, too exhausted to make a run for it. Though you don't get the sense that he would chase after you, even if you tried to escape.

Maybe that's exactly why you decide to stay put, but you don't give the suspicion any more thought.

"What do you want?" You finally ask, your voice croaky from being silent for so long.

"Nothing."

"Liar," you mutter, hugging your knees to your chest. "Everyone wants something."

He chuckles. Rests back on his hands. "I guess you're right about that."

Damn right you are. You didn't study the human condition through your years of training to be fooled so easily by pretty words.

"So?" You prompt him, still staring at the dreary horizon.

He takes a moment to respond. The silence is punctuated by the distant noises of traffic, an occasional car passing by, its headlights shimmering in the mist before disappearing down the road.

“The others are all out looking for you, you know,” he says simply. “Why do you think that is?”

If it were anyone else that had run away - their manager, a friend - you know what the answer would be. Because they care about that person. But how can you believe that about yourself, when you know you can never amount to anyone with that level of importance to them?

Ironic, since you’re the person with which they can be most intimate and vulnerable.

“I’m a liability,” you reply halfheartedly.

His silence serves to confirm your suspicions. A runaway PhysCom? Far too risky for a group at their level. You could become one of those anonymous sources like you saw in the news. A firsthand account of the BTS members’ secret sexual urges. Unacceptable. Snatches of words from the NDA you signed buzz around the edges of your mind like stray flies.

But since you're no longer connected to your network, then your tracker is probably disconnected. If the bus had come just a little earlier, you might already have escaped without a trace.

“You really think that’s the only reason?” Seokjin’s voice pulls you back to the moment.

His abysmal attempt to divert from the problem gets a hollow laugh out of you.

“Any other reason has ulterior motives. It’s just business.” You check the time on your ComGear. The bus should be here any minute. “I’m leaving, and I won’t let you stop me.”

“I don’t intend to,” he agrees, to your surprise. “God knows you’ve been put through enough.” He then leans forward, resting his forearms across his legs. “But for what it’s worth, you deserve to know the truth.”

Your ears perk up at this.

Seokjin seems to take your silence as permission to continue. “The reason we decided to suspend you. It wasn’t… entirely selfless.”

You purse your lips in irritation and fix your gaze upon the horizon, settling your chin beneath your crossed arms. “Right. Ulterior motives, like I said.”

He clicks his tongue. “Touche.”

You wait for him to continue, but he doesn't.

Your curiosity gets the better of you.

“So, what… were you planning to replace me?” You ask, trying to sound contemptuous. “I heard you all having your little group meeting in the kitchen. There are plenty of shiny new whores at your disposal, take your pick.”

He still makes no noise.

You wait, preparing to accept a bitter confirmation of all your fears.

But then he finds his voice. “We could never replace you, dear.”

You stop. Look over at him. His eyes are half lidded, his smile bittersweet as he stares off into the distance. After a few moments, he fishes around in his pocket and pulls something out, then hands it to you.

His smartphone.

“Here,” he murmurs, sympathy in the quirk of his lips. “In case you need to call anyone. Those devices they give you don’t have a cell plan, I assume.”

He seems to sense your wariness, and waves the phone a bit in a gesture of insistence. “I can buy a dozen new ones. It’s no trouble.”

You very hesitantly take it. “Thanks.”

Of course, he has no way to know that your ComGear is now jailbroken, for all intents and purposes. But… is this a trap? What if there’s a tracker in the phone? But why would he need to put a tracker in it if he doesn’t know your ComGear is off the grid?

The rumble of an approaching motor pulls you out of your cyclical thoughts, and you get on your feet, slowly coming out of your dissociative sulk.

But you still feel numb. Nothing matters anymore.

Nothing at all.

Jin gets up along with you, slipping his hands into his hoodie pocket. “Stay safe, alright?”

You give a brief nod of acknowledgment, only half in his direction as you shrug your bag onto your shoulder more securely. The hydraulics of the bus screech as the vehicle comes to a stop and lowers slightly, allowing you to step onboard.

You glance back, fully expecting Jin to stop you. But he doesn’t. He blinks raindrops out of his eyes while you board, and gives you a small smile once the doors close behind you. He lifts a hand in farewell, then turns and starts to walk away down the street.

He’s really letting you go.

You pay your fare and find a seat towards the back of the nearly empty bus. Rain pelts at the windows, picking up in earnest, and it feels like yet another layer, another barrier, separating yourself and creating an ever-growing chasm from the life you knew up until yesterday.

You pull out Jin’s phone, staring at the dark screen and wiping away stray raindrops from the surface with your sleeve. Why had he come to find you, if not to stop you?

“But for what it’s worth, you deserve to know the truth.”

Maybe he felt guilty. Or remorseful for the hell you’ve been put through recently. You would normally have felt immense satisfaction at such a thought.

But you can’t feel much of anything right now.

You don’t think you’ll be able to feel properly again. At least not for a long, long time…

Hm? The screen lit up. You must have pressed a button by accident. You swipe at it again, and to your surprise it unlocks. Who doesn’t put a passcode on their phone?

Is it possible… he disabled it before he gave it to you? Maybe. Whatever. You’re so tired of thinking, playing investigator and second guessing people’s motivations.

You scroll over to the phone icon, and tap on it, briefly considering calling your parents. But the wetness on your fingers messes with the touchscreen and you open the messages app instead.

You’re about to wipe the screen and try again, but… the most recent messages are… all about you. You tap on the group chat among the seven of them, currently bustling with activity.

[ Kim Namjoon ]: has anyone found her [ Park Jimin ]: hyung I’m so sorry [ Park Jimin ]: it’s all my fault [ Min Yoongi ]: she’s not at the studio [ Kim Namjoon ]: we’ll talk about it later Jimin [ Kim Namjoon ]: everyone keep looking [Jeon Jungkook]: manager said they can call her network to track her down [Kim Taehyung ]: should we do that? [ Jung Hoseok ]: no! she could get in trouble :( [ Min Yoongi ]: she’s not a stray pet [ Kim Namjoon ]: exactly [ Kim Namjoon ]: we need to keep this quiet for her sake [Kim Taehyung ]: she hasn’t replied to my texts or calls [ Min Yoongi ]: me neither [Jeon Jungkook]: hyung... will she be okay? [ Kim Namjoon ]: everything will be fine don’t worry [ Kim Namjoon ]: we’re going to fix this somehow [ Min Yoongi ]: whatever it takes [ Jung Hoseok ]: where could she have gone... [ Park Jimin ]: what if she doesn’t come back?

You scroll further up, past days and weeks and months of texts between them… not even a day between mentions of you. Wondering if you’re alright. Hoping you’ve eaten enough. Wanting to do more with you.

The thread of texts Jimin sent to Seokjin just yesterday.

Hyung I wish things were different I want to hold her I want to tell her she’s enough I wish I could kiss her… I think I love her Do you ever feel that way?

And Seokjin’s reply.

I do I know just what you mean Why do you think I turned those secondaries away last night, hm? No one can compare She really is special…

He didn’t… fuck the secondaries? After you broke at dinner, he… didn’t...?

You switch to his thread with Namjoon from a few days ago.

I know you’re our leader but I don’t think this is the way to go You need to be more cautious

Namjoon’s reply.

What we need is action, hyung If we work together on this, we could get rid of these unnecessary rules We could all have what we want Including her It’s what’s best for everyone

Seokjin took several minutes to reply.

You’re going to lose her.

Jin knew. He tried to talk Namjoon out of writing that stupid essay, or maybe it was about your suspension.

Either way, he defended you.

You open his thread with Hoseok. Dimly, you recognize that you shouldn’t be snooping, but you’re too absorbed to stop.

Hyung, I think she really wants this All of us ♡ I don’t know how, but we need to show her that it’s okay That we want it just as much

How do you know that’s what she wants?

I can’t say ♡ But I know now She wouldn’t reject us Our feelings She feels something too

The date and time lines up with this morning. The morning after he made love to you.

He didn’t tell them. He kept your secret.

“Our feelings”? What does he mean? Him, Jimin, Taehyung… Seokjin? Do they all…?

Your head spins, the hollowness of your heart filling with a rush of jumbled emotions, like a tide crashing in. All your numbness is washed out with light, just a pinprick at first, that grows rapidly into a ray of warmth as you consider what all this could mean. The chasm starts to narrow, and you get the urge to jump ship, to turn back and figure this shit out. To know once and for all what they want from you. What you mean to them.

But how can you trust this isn’t a trap? How can you be sure?

The answer is as simple as they come.

You can’t.

You can’t be absolutely certain that their intentions are pure… that this is the right thing to do… that you won’t be hurt again.

But maybe... trust isn’t about being infallible. Being right. Being sure.

Maybe it’s built on what ifs. On trying again, even with no guarantees.

Guarantees are only as good as their word, and talk is cheap. Lies are easy. Your Opticon had a 100% guarantee, and look where that got you.

But you remember the way Hoseok held you that night, and made love to you like you’ve never felt in your life... When Jimin kissed his way down your body, with only the best of intentions. Namjoon’s strong arms embracing you when you felt powerless. Yoongi’s hand never leaving yours, even while you waited in the hospital. Jungkook carrying you home after you fainted, breaking your door to make sure you were safe in bed. The look in Taehyung’s eyes when he finally kissed you, breaking the ice you’d been growing around your heart.

How Seokjin let you go.

Maybe...

You get up with a start, rush to the front of the bus, and hastily ask the driver to let you off, much to the old man’s disgruntlement, but the moment the doors whoosh open, you take off at a run.

You want to go home.

You want to try again.

No matter how much you try to bury it, to forget the way they make you feel, you care about them. All of them. On a much deeper level than that of a PhysCom and client. And it scares you.

But you’re done running from fear. From uncertainty.

Now you’re running towards it willingly, as you give chase down the torrential streets, searching for that familiar hooded figure and hoping you’re not too late. You’re embracing the doubt, the fear, the uncertainty, the paranoia... letting their shadowy claws sink into you until they can’t hurt you anymore. Until they fade away, cowering under the glow of your determination.

You’re setting some new rules for yourself, no longer letting fear control your thoughts and actions, barring you from any chance of happiness.

You see Seokjin in the distance, trudging home through the pouring rain. You run faster.

You’re fucking terrified. But you’ve never felt so free in your life.

“Jin!” You shout to get his attention, still a block away. He turns around, and shakes his head, seemingly confused, but a smile starts to appear. You smile too.

Finally, you catch up to him, and without warning, you throw your arms around his shoulders. Damn, he’s always taller than you remember.

He laughs, shocked by your change of heart. “What are you doing?”

“I want to hear you say it.” You reply, looking up at him as rain dashes down your face. You don’t know when you started crying, but you’re grateful to the weather for masking your tears.

“Say what?” He asks, his hands resting on your waist to support you. Thunder rumbles in the distance, rain sliding down his perfect face.

“How you feel about me.” You reply, studying his eyes. “Be honest.”

He seems to sense the gravity in your words. He holds you closer. His eyes soften.

“I think I’ve fallen in love with you.”

For the first time since all of this started, you sense no deception in his words, no double meaning, no hidden agenda.

Because you aren’t searching for reasons to doubt this time.

You’re searching for reasons to trust, and you find them.

You want to kiss him. So you do.

[whyamiinopmhellagain]

How Dateable are the Heroes of One Punch Man?

A note, I know these kinds of things are not the only factors that make a relationship successful, but they are large ones. This is simply my take on it. 

They are all rated on a scale from one to ten. If they receive a zero, they are considered undateable for reasons that cannot be fixed through emotional growth. 

Also, this is pretty lengthy. Be warned, and happy reading!

Hit the Lotto (8-10): 

King (9.5/10): King, in my opinion, is the most dateable hero. He’s a genuinely good guy. He also seems to have a lot of common interests, such as anime and gaming, which makes him pretty chill to get along with. He’s a homebody, which means if you get close to him, he’ll want to spend more time with you, and doesn’t mind having quiet moments. In fact, I think he enjoys them more! King is not excessively arrogant, and doesn’t appear to have attachment or trust issues. He really just wants someone to love him for being him, and not for living a lie. The fear of him getting exposed, and being surrounded by the press will probably be frequent worries in the relationship, but in both cases, it seems to be protected by King’s luck powers, and the fact that he doesn’t go out much. If you can deal with those, and help him with the anxiety that comes with it, you’re golden for a happy, healthy relationship! 

Mumen Rider (9/10): Awww, look at you! You hooked a sweetie pie! He’s kind, morally strong, good hearted, and hardworking! He will not hesitate to shower you in kindness and love. He does not seem to have any attachment issues, or trouble with building trust and a healthy relationship. The major issues of this one are he’s constantly getting hurt, so you’ll never know when he’ll be in the hospital, and he’s pretty much always working. The first one is counteracted by his indomitable spirit, and how devoted he is to making the world a better place. He also would very much appreciate if you’d visit him in the hospital, and even more when he’s discharged, and still needs a little extra care (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.).The second one’s counteraction is with the fact that when he cares about something, he cares hard. If he loves you, he’d totally work to shell out those extra minutes for you, if you’re willing to do the same.

Saitama (8.5/10): This relationship is very similar to King’s! They both have the same, “we veg, we read manga, play video games and stay indoors” mentality. The same pros as King. The reason he’s ranked lower is because of very obvious depression, that is slowly getting better, but I doubt will fully ever be cured (the price he paid for his training), and there will be people breathing down his neck. If you want to be with our egg, you have to check with the toaster first. He’s very close with his Sensei, and Saitama makes it a priority to make sure he is safe and happy. Fubuki may also interfere as well, but she’s most likely no threat if you mean that much to Saitama.

Tanktop Master (8.5/10): Honestly, this man is so wholesome. The only reason he’s lower, is because we don’t know too much about his personality.  He’s strong, kind, and an excellent leader! No obvious arrogance or aggression, and seems to have the ability to just talk things out with people, I realize this relationship would also have the “always having people over” thing. Except much more active.They work out, run, wear tank-tops, and have group gatherings all the time! If you’re extroverted, and like to make friends, you two will fit perfectly! He may. also have some insecurities about his skill level. Be sure to comfort him with a warm hug, because he really is a strong boy. 

Darkshine (8.5/10): Remember what I said about Tanktop Master? Same applies to him. Wholesome, but unknown. He may have more strength and power, but his ego is much more fragile. He may need some comfort from time to time, and I’m sure he’d be happy to take in a hug and some encouraging words from you! He seems to have the ability to form healthy bonds, and build trust quickly and safely, which is necessary to a happy relationship. Overall, seems like a good time for both of you! 

Zombieman (8/10): Odds are, this is going to work out. That is, if you can break down the massive emotional barriers he’s built up. While he seems pretty chill, he knows something. He knows that everyone he loves and cares about is going to die before him. He distances himself from almost everyone, simply because he doesn’t want to be put through that pain. I feel like he’s experienced it before. Unless he starts to care about you, and when he cares, he cares HARD. He’ll be in it for the long run. If you can take the time and effort to get to know him, maybe, just maybe, he’ll invite you over for dinner with him and Child Emperor. It will grow from there, maybe he invites you over, just the two of you, watch a movie, and sit on the couch. (Personal headcanon of mine, he’s got Child Emperor, and he loves taking care of him. Maybe when he leaves the nest... he’ll want to raise one or two with you?)

Won’t be the best, but not the worst (5-7): 

Metal Bat (7/10): He’s a tough boy with a heart of pure gold! He fights very passionately for what he believes in, and won’t let anyone stop him! Except Zenko. If you want this teen’s (please remember he’s young) heart, you’re going to have to go through her. You’ll also have to be okay with the fact that most of his time is going to be devoted to taking care of her, and she’ll be around you two 90% of the time. He needs someone who can give here that sibling affection, like having a second parent. He also needs someone who can be his IQ, and his books smarts. Help him with his homework, take notes for him in class, or help Zenko study, (It probably will be a good way to win her over too), it will be very much appreciated. Also, be sure you are someone who he can be a kid with. He’s 17, and has to act like an adult. He needs time to take a break, drop Zenko off with someone, and go sit in the streets at night and eat ice cream while you both watch the street lights. Somedays, he needs a shoulder to cry on from exhaustion with his job, or panic about the future. Badd’s going to need you to help him grow. He’ll be loyal and happy with you, you just have to be patient with him, his overload of responsibilities, and his sister.

Fubuki (6.5/10): I hope you like your women in charge and powerful, because that’s what you’re going to get. She’ll be with her group, making deals and looking for more underlings. You won’t be her first priority. Don’t try to hit on her, unless you’re a higher rank than she is. Otherwise, you’re going to have to catch her attention the hard way. If you even manage to get her to see, acknowledge you, and like you, you’re not even halfway done. You have to go through the Blizzard Group. If you pass that, you must pass your hardest test, the association’s secret weapon, Tatsumaki. Older sisters do worry, and intruded. She just wants to protect her precious little sister. If you can win her over, then you have secured a necessary piece for Fubuki’s heart; she values her sister’s thoughts more than she lets on. but those people will still be there to protect her. She needs to be the strong one, because softness is a weakness. Or so she’s been taught. You’ll need to get her to open up a little. You’ll see that she has a soft side. She frets whenever Eyelashes or Wild Monkey get beat up, and buys Lily a scoop of ice cream whenever she gets a high score on any test. That doesn’t mean she’s not the leader. She wants to wear the pants in the relationship. She’s the breadwinner.  Show her how strong she is, even when she isn’t large and in charge.  If you can do that, her group will notice a difference in the way she carries herself. She’ll be a bit lighter on her feet, and have more courage to take on higher level missions by herself. She’ll be pretty tough to break into, but not completely impossible, if you know how to do it. (Side note, thanks to @metalbatandzenko​ for helping me with this one!) 

Pig God (6/10): He’s mostly just here because of mystery. We don’t know pretty much anything about him, other than he’s a good guy who likes to eat. We don’t know anything about his dark side, or what he truly values. He has been seen to be helpful, and dedicated to his job, which gives him points, but not enough to make him rank higher.  

Atomic Samurai (5.5/10): I feel like he’s not the first person anyone would go after. He’s aging, he’s busy, and can get quite arrogant. His disciples are like his kids, and if you want to be close with him, you have to go through them first. You must be good friends with them, you’ll be seeing them quite often. I see him as someone who’d want to keep his hero live and private life separate. Sure, he’d introduce you to his disciples and Silverfang, maybe take you to a party or too, but other than that, he’d keep you out of the loop for your own safety, so he won’t be around too much. He just wants someone to share a futon with. Maybe make him some dinner, and talk about regular stuff. Not everything has to be about fighting. Sometimes, he just wants someone to drink tea and meditate with, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Silverfang (5/10): He seems like a good, respectable guy. However, he’s 81. The only reason I could see someone dating him would be for a sugar daddy, because S-class makes that coin. As good as a guy he is, odds are, it’s not going to last very long. 

Yeah, this most likely won’t be healthy (1-4):

Amai Mask (4/10): This relationship seems like every fan’s dream at first. He’s tall, rich, famous, and has a great set of abs. The courting phase to his partner will seem heavenly, as the world’s biggest superstar showers them with attention. He woos them gracefully, until he deems you safe to let into his life  good enough arm candy. He’ll keep you for as long as he needs you, but still treating you like royalty in front of the cameras. In reality, he will just be throwing you under the bus for his work, and trying to cover the wounds with his money. If you (understandably) hate the treatment, and confront him about it, he’ll just tell you to leave. If you put up with it, he’ll throw you out when he needs the coverage. He just has to hope he doesn’t fall for you. He can’t let you see what lies underneath. You fell in love with Handsome Kamen Amai Mask, not [Webcomic Spoiler]. 

Genos (3/10): I don’t see this happening now. That kid is traumatized as hell, and needs to learn to cope. Losing everyone and everything is hard, which makes him cling to what he has. Right now, he’s clinging to Saitama, and coping with his past in an unhealthy way. While he is compassionate, kind, and courageous to a fault, he isn’t emotional ready to give his heart away just yet. Maybe in a couple years, when he matures and he either gets his closure on the Mad Cyborg situations, or accepts it, deals with his grief, and moves on. 

Flashy Flash (2.5/10): Yeah, no. If we’re talking about trauma, this dude just doesn’t want to accept the fact that he has it, or he knows it, and is too scared to ask for help with it. He’s arrogant, emotionally distant, downright cold sometimes. The only reason he’s higher than Tatsumaki is because I feel like he’d want a relationship in the future, if he actually admits that he needs help, and needs to let go of the past. Then, and only then, can he open himself up to other people. He’s not ready yet.  

Tatsumaki (1/10): This girl has emotional issues, is controlling, has extremely high standards, and a shit ton of trauma that all needs addressing before she enters a relationship. Also, she doesn’t cares about those kinds of relationships that much. She’s very take, and never gives. Odds are, she doesn’t want you or anyone in her life. She has a job to do, and that’s what she’s devoted too. 

Why would you? (0/10):

Watchdog Man: He’s a dude that acts and dresses like a dog, and doesn’t leave his post. That doesn’t sound super appealing at all, but to each their own, I guess.

Child Emperor: This should be obvious. 

Puri Puri Prisoner: If this guy likes you.....RUN

Drive Knight: Are y’all evil Cyborg fuckers? 

Metal Knight: He has no sympathy, empathy or compassion. He’s old, and he has a tiny dick. Why?  

-----

This post went in so many different directions. Anyway, please feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments, I love hearing from you all!

*Requests open! Unedited*

[slocumjoe]

2 headcanons per companion

Cait:

- Touchy person. After learning and understanding that it doesn't inherently mean pain, learns to speak and hear it as a love language. Her touches are very jock, though. Shoulder slaps, light punches, hair ruffling, kind of an older brother form of physical affection. Often gets into play-fights with MacCready.

- Has a lovely singing voice, but no one knows because she never sings. Ever. If she sang, it would be a quiet, raspy croon. The type of singing you'd expect to hear in a castle ruins at the coast during a storm. Haunting and enchanting.

Curie:

- Amazing baker, not so good at cooking. Baking is a science, cooking is more about intuition and creativity. She's a by-the-books girl, and unless she has an exact recipe, her cooking is going to taste like anxiety. Great at breads, burns eggs. Always makes delicious muffins, her soups and stews are flavorless and soggy.

She has no idea. Thinks it's fine, and no one will dare tell her to stick to dough-based foods.

- The first time she got drunk, it was off wine. She woke up with her head in agony and on the roof of a shack about 50 miles away from Sanctuary. And with a tattoo on her back. Doesnt know about the tattoo. No one knows about the tattoo. It's a spoon. A very poorly done spoon. Possibly a ladle.

Danse:

- This man may as well be a bear. He has a big appetite, sleeps like he's hibernating for winter, is covered in thick body hair. Danse will wake up only for his natural alarm, his clock alarm, or someone walking up to him and telling him to get up. No noise or physical disturbance will wake him. Nothing. As for his stomach, he isn't a glutton, but look at him. Big guy needs fuel. He can eat a normal amount and be fine, but could get himself kicked out of Golden Corral.

- Speaking of food. He eats everything with no reaction regardless of if he likes it or not. It looks like he's bored even if he's eating the rare good meal. Food is just something neutral, with cons to certain things. He prefers plainer flavors, but is immune to spice. Can drink an entire bottle of Tabasco sauce, Sriracha sauce, and a chile sauce with no expression. The blank stare and spice immunity aren't synth things, Curie and X6 are just the opposite.

Deacon:

- Takes long walks at night through settlements. Feels at peace in liminal spaces. The ruins of Boston and all the other destroyed cities don't have the same effect. Something about being the only one aware, living unnoticed in a place filled with people. It's lonely, but nothing gives the same clarity.

- Hates subway tunnels. Go on forever, too long to see what's at the end, something could be at any corner - they creep him out. If you still, you'll hear something. Machinery even when the place is inactive. Shuffling. Even stiller, might hear breathing echoing from way down a tunnel. Hates it to hell and back. Has to take a long smoke break if he has to go in one alone.

Hancock:

- Weird with kids. Likes them, but worries about himself. He isn't the...best example. He has no filter, they can tell something is wrong about him, and he just doesn't know how to act. They're just tiny humans, but there are rules. He doesn't want to accidently hurt them or inspire them to follow his screwed up footsteps.

- He doesn't care about what people think unless he cares. Some schmuck sneering at him when he pops a mentats? That guy's issue. Nick's frown? Curie's wide-eyed fretting? The way Cait's face goes soft and her eyes crinkle in sympathy?

...that matters.

He starts using less.

MacCready:

- Extravert. He needs his space, but hates being alone. Not having a support to fall back on is terrifying. The most anxious he'd ever been since Lucy died was his time alone in the Commonwealth. Sure, he had people, but not...not people of his own. Not a family. Leaving his boy was hard and being alone just as. Was often nauseous and prone to headaches until the SoSu.

- Hates the acknowledgement of intimate body parts in public. Hancock and Cait went on a tirade of sex jokes and he was just as, if not more, squeamish as the other prudes. While exploring a vault, a sex ed video came on the projector and he was red as a tomato for hours. It didn't help that he was standing in front of it and...well. You know what happens when you stand in front of projectors.

Goes all blushy when more adult talk comes up. Apparently Danse didn't know what m*sturbation was and that moment in that room nearly had him crawling out of his skin.

Nick:

- Has a little switch in his brain that decides if he's capable of math. One day he'll be a walking calculator, another he'll forget that 7 is more than 6. He was a weird math student. Did all the reading and none of the work, aced the tests. You put him under pressure and he'll crank out the craziest equations, but you ask him to multiply two 4 digit numbers and you can see a little blue swirl in his eye before he sighs and goes to fetch scratch paper. Being a good tester doesn't mean he's not a born theater kid.

- Coat pockets are portals to other dimensions. Has everything you need. Bobby pins? Check. Ammo? Check. Food rations? Clean water? Smokes? Check. A small statue of Cappy? A page from a magazine that was never released due to a MLM scam in the publishing company? Half a pair of sunglasses?

Sometimes puts random garbage in his pockets just to screw with Ellie. Other times, genuinely doesn't know where things come from. Once found a yao gui claw in his chest pocket. It's a good luck charm, but he never picked it up and no one could have slipped it in. Jokes about the coat being haunted, but only half joking.

Piper:

- Opposite to Nick, things go missing in her coat. Nick calls it "the washer" for some reason. She'll drop a pen in a pocket and never see it again. Double checks the pockets for holes and splits before heading out. Still loses things. Once lost a whole pistol.

But more interestingly. She lost a purple gel pen.

Week later, Nick pulls a purple gel pen out of his pocket.

Has a corkboard for the theories about the connection.

- Makes an amazing stew of yao gui, carrots, potatoes, stingwing honey, and various herbs. Its a family recipe that just isn't a normal stew, there's something different about it. When asked, will joke that it's human meat. Very few people realize she's joking. Either way, it has a flavor that sets it apart from other stews.

The secret?

There's a mutated form of garlic in the southeast part of the Commonwealth.

Only her family knows where it grows and what it looks like.

Preston:

- Not so much of a night owl as much as he just...doesn't have a steady circadian rhythm. You can find him in the kitchen at 1 pm asleep on the counter in the middle or awake at 1 am making a 3 tiered cake. Doesn't have an alarm clock. His sleeping pattern bothers even the poorest sleepers. Danse is visibly upset when he describes his schedule.

- His history of partners, both romantic and purely sexual, is crazy. He has the most interesting and horrifying stories. One girlfriend was convinced she was the reincarnated Mistress of Mystery. A boyfriend cheated on him with his step grandmother. He was once involved in a multi-person break up because apparently his boyfriend was in a poly relationship that went south on all fronts due to a chem deal's profits going missing as they were about to split the caps.

Don't ask about Marge.

Marge was...probably something he imagined during a fever.

X6:

- His pantries and fridge have nothing but junk food. He likes vegetables and fruit, but they take up valuable sugar space.

Once ate a giant, 200+ year expired cheesecake and puked for an hour. When Nick found out, popped a fuse. X was out of commission for...so long. Turns out he's lactose intolerant.

- Has been flirted with so many times. Each time, turned pink and lost all control of his words. He becomes a stuttering, cherry-cheeked mess at romantic interest. Not because he reciprocates, he just wasn't trained for it. There is no protocol for "Wanna come back to my place?"

Someone kissed his cheek and he actually ran and jumped out of a window to escape. Hancock has it on video and sometimes watches it to produce serotonin.

[elysiashelby]

In Another World - T. Shelby Imagine Ch. 2

Paring: (Eventual) Thomas Shelby x Aliena Welsh (OC)

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Word Count: 2, 522

WARNINGS: Cursing

Summary: Aliena Welsh has been living in the universe of the show Peaky Blinders for 2 months now. She’s beginning to make a life and a home for herself, but she’s been avoiding calling Thomas by his name. And he wants to know why.

MASTERLIST  CHAPTER ONE CHAPTER THREE

A/N: So, I forgot to add something very important. I am not from Liverpool. I do not know the proper way scousers talk. I’ve done some research and watched movies, but I will not advocate that it’s perfect. I’d love to get my readers’ opinions on it, and if enough responses come back saying that I shouldn’t show her accent in the writing- it will be gone! Also, this is the pronunciation of Aliena ( A Lee ay nah ). Thanks for reading!

So, I've been with the Shelby's for two months now! It has definitely been something! I mean Polly is very strict and for the first couple of days I was taking care of John's kids, she was watching over me like a hawk. I mean I didn't mind and I totally appreciated it. I dealt with me own family members, meaning I could've dealt with them however I wanted but these weren't me kids to punish. So, that's where Polly helped me out. She set me boundaries. 

With the cooking, I learned a lot of things. Like how to make eggs and bacon and sausage for breakfast. I can basically make anything Polly has taught me for the past 2 months. I also clean the house regularly. I do the sweeping, moping, the trash, and the laundry. I honestly don't mind. What's fun is that Polly found out that I didn't know UK currency and how it worked and she taught me it along with Finn. But, Finn actually already knew how to count money. He was 10, of course he did! He was there so that Polly could keep an eye on ‘em. 

I'm currently working on buying our weekly groceries for the main house, and for John. For the main house, Polly helps me out, but for John's house, I have to figure it out on me own.   

I was doing the kids' laundry as I watched over them. Katie, the eldest at 7, was helping me along with her sister Ilsa, who was 6. Robert, who was 4, was playing with his younger brother John, who was 3. I found out that John had knocked up Martha when they were 16, resulting in little Katie. They had Ilsa a year later, waited 2 years and had little Robert, and then baby John Jr. was a result of John Sr.’s vacation days during the war. 

I was scrubbing harshly against a stain when I noticed things had gotten out of hand. "Robbie, don't hit your brother so hard! You'll regret it when you're older. Katie, dear, you need to space out the clothes more! Ilsa, you need to scrub that spot harder." I shouted at them. 

Ilsa huffed. "Aliena, I want to go play! Why can't I?" 

"It's not that you can't, sweetheart. It's just- I need your help. I have to take care of all of your clothes along with your father's, along with your uncles’ and aunt's clothes. I would have your brothers do the same if they were any older, but they aren't. They would just mess the clothes up or not wash them right. So, as much as it pains me to prevent you from playing, I need your help, alright?" 

She groaned loudly. "Fine! But only because you need me." She muttered while sporting a big pout. 

I chuckled at her and reached over to pinch her pout. She flinched at it. 

"Aliena, why would I regret it?" Robbie shouted. 

"What?" I asked with my eyes squinting as I tried to get a good look at him. 

He ran towards me, which made Johnny follow. "Why would I regret hitting this annoying bugger?" He repeated while pushing his brother's head. 

I tsked at his antics. "You'll regret it because he'll grow bigger one day and give you a beating back. Mark my words, he'll learn to get you when you're weak!"

"No, he wouldn't!"

"Oh, but he would! It's what siblings do you see. I'm not telling you to never hit 'em because I know that's how you both play, but just don't make each other cry. Okay?"

Robbie tilted his head as if in deep thought before agreeing and running off with his brother. 

I sighed knowing that he probably told me a blag. 

Speaking of blags, you know that story I fed Thomas when I first arrived here was total bullshit, right? The truth is me whole family, nieces and all, are back in California in one house. Me da and ma aren't dead. Me sister doesn't have a husband, but does have a daughter. Me brother doesn't have a wife, but actually has 4 kids. Me da's brother is not mental, but lives with me gran. I forgot the reason why. And me mum still talks to her family all while maintaining the mentality that they are jealous of her because she's a stay-at-home mum. Also, I was dead-on about me body being younger. I had to have been 16, at most, because when I was 18 me features began to be more defined, and now I was stuck with this baby face again. 

When we were all done with the laundry, it was late afternoon. I made us all lunch, and then let them all run abar with their friends with the expectation of little Johnny. Him and I were going back over to Polly's. He once asked me about this decision, and I told him it was because he was too young. He pouted and groaned, but accepted it nonetheless. 

I opened the door to the house and he bolted right in. I laughed at the sight. I went straight away to the kitchen and put on an apron. I had to, ironically, make sandwiches for the boys. Finn probably found something to eat or Polly made him something, but it was my responsibility to feed the older Shelby brothers. 

"Finn, take care of your cousin while I go 'n feed your brothers!" I shouted as I finished making the last sandwich. 

I put a plate on top of the other holding two sandwiches and I had the third one set on its own plate, ready to be served. I opened the door by hitting it with me bum. I was instantly overwhelmed by the yelling and shouting of countless men that were in the betting shop. I had to weave me way through clumps of men as well as maintaining awareness of all their movements, so that they don't bump into me! 

John was closest even though he was actually the farthest. But he was the only one out of his office. Always near the blackboard that one.  

"John, I have your lunch!" 

He smiled at me while taking the plate. "Thanks, love!"

I nodded in return. Then, I went for Arthur's office. I knocked, he saw me, and told me to come in. 

"Here's your lunch, Arthur." I separated the plates and got one of the two sandwiches to place on the plate. 

"Ah! Finally, some fuckin' food! I swear Aliena, you make a mean sandwich. Thanks, doll." Arthur said before taking a huge bite. 

I said "you're welcome" with a rather embarrassed smile and left. I walked out of the room and closed the door behind me. Now, I was holding one plate in my hand. I inhaled largely and puffed my cheeks as I exhaled. 

'I swear I'll never get used to 'em.' I thought.  

I walked over to Thomas' office, knocked, and was allowed to come in. I turned the knob and took in the sight. Thomas Shelby kept his head down, inspecting his documents while nursing a ciggie that was in-between his two fingers resting there with his arm bent on the desk. 

"Your lunch, Mr. Shelby." I whispered as I set his plate down. 

He didn't even lift his head as he muttered "thank you." So, I just left. 

I wiped my hands on me apron, walked back into the main house, and closed the doors behind me. I walked back into the kitchen and tossed me apron on a chair. 

"Finn, is your cousin still alive?"

"Yeah!"

"Good! Keep him that way for the next two to three hours!"

"Okay!"

After serving lunch to the boys, I had to start cleaning the house. I beat the dirt out of rugs, I swept away dirt, and moped the floors afterward. When I was done with that I was taking down clothes that I've just washed yesterday. Then, I got ready to start ironing them, but mid through it was around 4 o'clock. 

I had to stop and go find the rest of John's kids. I got little Johnny and walked back to the flat, but when I got there, I found all three of them waiting outside of the door. I was able to start dinner with ease that night. Katie helped me make chicken soup. She was always so adorable. It took little over an hour. I ate with them, and then told Ilsa it was her night to wash the dishes. 

She’s so stubborn, reminds me of meself. I bet she’ll be a boss feminist when she gets older. I can imagine her now, marching for Women’s Rights. 

Anyway, I ran over back to the main house and helped Polly finish making their dinner. It was basically chopping and peeling. When she didn't need me anymore, I had to go back to the kids. I was up with them 'till 8:30 and then I had to tuck them into bed. I got done by 9, but little Johnny came out abar three times before settling down. When I was confident they were all asleep, I tidied up the house a little more. I just put away a toy or two that they'd missed. 

It was 11:37 in the night when John got home. He thanked me and gave me a pound before sending me on me way. With a pep in my step, I trod over back to the main house. 

I got me key to unlock the door, stepped in, and then locked it. With a key still in me hand, I rested against the door. Me hand with the key was clutching on the doorknob for dear life, me body thudded softly as it collided with the door. I closed me eyes and let out a heavy sigh. I rested there for what seemed like an eternity. But I got meself back up. I took the pins out of me hair that finally managed to form and maintain a proper bun. Me cheeks puffed as I exhaled and I shook out me hair. I put me pins in me coat pocket as I made me way to the couch. Me body just plopped down and I just relaxed. 

Me feet and back soon started to ache. So, I took off me shoes and socks, and started massaging me feet and rolling my ankles. I followed up by cracking me back, and then going upstairs to me room. I started placing everything nicely and where they were supposed to be. I changed into pajamas, which was just a dress. I attempted to fall asleep in bed, but ended up failing. Instead, I went downstairs, grabbed the tub, heated up some water, and drew meself a bath in me own room. 

The only way we could cleanse ourselves here was in a tub. It wasn't installed into the house, oh no! It was quite literally a grey tub, and I have to use another tub for me hair. When I was done, I poured me hair water down the kitchen drain, and then worked me way with the water I used for me body. Afterward, I settled down in front of the fire that was in the living room. I sat in front of it while wringing the water out of me hair. The crackling of the fire as well as its heat was comforting. So much so that I found meself dozing off. 

It was during that allotted time that a hand suddenly shook me. Frightened, I gasped, rolled on to my knees from leaning on me thighs, and tried to focus on the person who jolted me awake. 

"You know, you'll end up catching a cold if you go to sleep with wet hair right away?" Thomas said while kneeling down beside me. "And your hair will be a pain to deal with if you don't brush it soon." 

I nodded while looking at him with hooded, unfocused eyes. "Thank you, Mr. Shelby." My voice sounded hoarse like I actually had been just awoken from a nap when in reality all I did was close me eyes for a second. Me eyes kept wanting to close. I chose to rub me arms to keep me awake. 

"Do I make you uncomfortable, Ms. Welsh?" He asked while properly sitting down next to me. 

I squeezed me eyes shut, silently cringing. I knew I was making it obvious, but I figured that he was used to it. Hell, even Arthur and John don't talk to him without minding themselves. 

With a tight grip on me arms and an equally tight smile I said, "No, not uncomfortable, Mr. Shelby. But I am intimidated by you." 

He nodded silently. "Intimidation is often used as another word for fear."

I giggled at his words. "It's actually a synonym for frighten or terrify, but also overawe. Which means to be impressed by someone to like the point of speechlessness." Me hands were now an active part in our small conversation.

Only reason I knew that was from searching up the word so much! 

"So, am I correct to assume you're telling me you're impressed by me, Ms. Welsh?"

I pursed me lips while leaning me head to the side, resting on me arms that had been crossed on top of me bent knee. "I guess. What I'm really trying to say is that… I don't know actually. I just don't want to cross a line with you, in all honesty. If I were to say something wrong- like a mispronunciation! Arthur and John would 'ave a laugh and a joke, but my expected reaction from you is silence. Silence can be the most daunting thing."

Thomas hummed while looking at me silently. 

I couldn't stop a giggle and pointed at him. "See! Like that! Are you just being understanding, or are you judging me?" I laughed even more afterward, and then I yawned. 

Through squinted eyes, I saw Thomas smirk. It was small. I'm sure it was really a half-assed smile. 

 "I see that you call my brothers by their names. Even though I insisted from the moment we met for you to call me by my name, you don't. Is this the reason why?"

I hummed. "I guess. I mean, well, you're my boss. I figure you have to use, you know, the proper terms. It's my first job 'n all! I didn't want to do anything to mess up." I said while tracing over the patterns in the carpet. 

"Well, from the way I see it, I am your boss and your boss is giving you an order." 

I tried to stifle my giggle and hide me smile, but it didn't do much since he had eyes and ears. "Fine. Thomas."

"Aliena."

After that, he went up to his room. Me fatigue was oddly gone yet at its worst at the same time. It took me another hour before I managed to drag meself up and sleep on the couch.

TAG LIST: @amirahiddleston @nemesis729​

[emy-loves-you]

Have Your Name (And Your Back) Chapter 5

Summary: Breakfast is served and Lord Ignis learns more about Patton’s life at Hart manor

Warnings: Self-deprecating thoughts, descriptions of Patton's 'punishments', touch starvation, boys in skirts, malnourishment, food and eating, and illiteracy (unable to read and write in your native language)

Chapter 4 | Masterlist | Chapter 6

Patton stood frozen with fear as the door swung open. He knew Lord Ignis stood on the other side, but he couldn���t see as tears blurred his vision. He’s gonna punish me. Mama beat me with her heels when I tried them on. Is he gonna do that? The Duke didn’t punish me for getting out of bed, but he wasn’t the one who ordered me to. Maybe if I apologize and give the clothes back, he’ll only punish me for getting out of bed! Patton opened his mouth to speak-

“I see you’ve activated the closet.” Patton watched as Lord Ignis ran his hand along a few of the outfits. “It’s designed to make outfits that you want to wear. They should all be perfect fits and in colors you like. Every time you step on the platform, the closet will update itself.” He took a few steps forward, but was still far from Patton’s spot in the back of the closet. “I’m glad it got your size right, I was afraid it might not take your malnutrition into account. By the way, that outfit looks great on you, Pat! Have you tried twirling around in it yet? I have this red dress that I’ll spin around in and it fans out like a wildfire- are you crying?”

Patton lifted a hand up to his cheek, surprised to feel that it was wet. His knees started to shake, and suddenly there was a pair of arms around Patton, holding him upright. Patton started shaking, a fire searing across his skin that had nothing to do with his Fairy Godfather’s magic. Patton looked up at his Fairy Godfather, noting how worried he looked. Lord Ignis was speaking, and Patton forced himself to listen.

“Please speak to me, Pat. Just tell me what’s wrong and I swear I’ll try my best to fix it. Do you not like the skirt? You can try something else, all of these clothes are yours- Oh, was it because I walked in on you? Did you not hear me? Did you say no and I didn’t hear you? I’m so sorry, I thought you might prefer it being soundproofed, but I can fix it-”

“Is this a hug?” Lord Ignis went quiet and Patton looked down, not able to look him in the eye. He started rambling, trying to get his point across. “The Duke said that hugs are a form of comfort, and he held me like this and it felt nice but it was really warm. This feels really hot, like my skin is on fire, but it makes me feel so comfy and safe, and I wanted to know but I understand if this isn’t a hug and you’re upset with me-”

“Shh.” Patton went silent, feeling Lord Ignis’ arms wrap around his back. His hands started rubbing circles between Patton’s shoulder blades, and Patton immediately relaxed into his hold. “Yes, this is a hug. I’m sorry I didn’t warn you beforehand. Have you never experienced a hug before today?” Patton nodded. The hands stopped for a moment before continuing. “Well, know that I am always willing to give you a hug, whenever you want one.”

They stood there for a few minutes, the only sound being Patton’s quiet sniffles. Eventually, Patton spoke. “Y-you said that these clothes are mine?” He nuzzled his face into Lord Ignis’ chest, already expecting the answer.

“Of course. This is your room. Everything in here is yours, and soon you’ll have even more things in there!” Patton started laughing, now crying in relief.

“I thought I would get punished for getting out of bed and trying on these clothes! I just wanted to feel pretty, and I thought you wouldn’t come back for a while. And I felt so pretty in the mirror, but you came in and I thought I was in trouble. I was hoping I would only get a light punishment for getting out of bed if I said sorry and put the clothes back! But instead, you said I looked pretty and you hugged me and everything feels like it’s on fire but I love it, and I’m sorry I made you worry-”

“It’s okay, Pat.” Patton looked up, surprised to see Lord Ignis smiling softly. “I understand now, and I assure you, you will not be punished for something like that, and I would never punish you through physical harm.” He brought a hand up to wipe the tears off of Patton’s cheeks. “If there is something that I don’t want you to do, I’ll let you know beforehand and tell you why. And if you still end up doing it, we’ll go over why you did it and see how we can prevent it from happening in the future. I never want you to be scared that I’ll hurt you. I know it’ll take a while before you fully believe me, but I never want you to be hurt ever again. You’re my Godson, and I care about you.” They stood there for a few more minutes before Lord Ignis pulled away slightly. Patton whined at the loss and Lord Ignis chuckled. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere. I was just wondering if you’re hungry. I have all of your food set up.”

Patton nodded before grimacing. “Sorry, the heat’s too much now.” He felt the arm around his shoulder pull away and he whined. Even though it was getting uncomfortable, he’d rather be hugged for hours than have his Fairy Godfather pull away. Patton bit his lip before forcing himself to speak. “C-can I hold your hand instead?” Stupid stupid Patton, why would he say yes to such a stupid request-

Patton sighed when he felt his Fairy Godfather’s hand around his own. Lord Ingis was rather a rather large man-fairy-thing (and Patton was quite short and skinny) so Patton’s hand was easily dwarfed in his. Patton was surprised when he was led to a beautiful dining room. The table was smaller than the one at the Hart manor, but it was made of glass, gold accents etched into the table. Lord Ignis pulled out a chair and gestured for Patton to sit in it. Patton did so stiffly, not used to such treatment. Patton watched curiously as the chair was pushed in and he was left facing several covered platters. Lord Ignis uncovered each dish to reveal large piles of scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, and a large glass of milk.

Patton stared at the piles of food in front of him, his stomach choosing that moment to grumble loudly. He blushed in embarrassment while Lord Ignis chuckled. “You didn’t specify what flavor of jam you wanted, so…” he lifted the final lid to reveal a small pyramid of jam flavors. “I grabbed all the flavors I could find!”

Patton stared at the food in awe. “I get to eat all of this?!” Lord Ignis smiled and nodded, sitting in the chair opposite of Patton.

Patton starred for a few more seconds before his hunger made itself known again. Patton blushed again before grabbing a serving spoon, watching Lord Ignis carefully. When he didn’t show any signs of anger or displeasure, merely watching curiously, Patton served himself a little bit of everything. He took a small bite out of the eggs and made an embarrassingly loud sound. He looked up at his Fairy Godfather, who chuckled. “I assume you like the eggs?” Patton nodded. He’d eaten eggs before, but they were always cold and wet with no seasoning. This was probably- no, it was definitely the best food he’d ever eaten. And he was only on bite one! “I’m glad. Don’t be embarrassed to show your enthusiasm, it lets me know that I made it to your liking.” He pulled out a book, the cover in a language Patton couldn’t read. “Do you mind if I read this while you eat?” Patton shook his head and he smiled, turning his attention to the book.

Patton continued to eat the eggs, making happy noises with every bite. He turned to the bacon, curious since he had never had any before. He took a bite and immediately fought the urge to spit it out. He did not like that! He looked up at Lord Ignis, who was still reading his book. He turned back to the bacon. He didn’t like it, but Lord Ignis might get upset if he doesn’t eat it. He took small bites, forcing himself to swallow each time. He tried to not make any sounds of displeasure for several minutes as he finished one strip on bacon and moved to grab another.

“Is there something wrong with the bacon?” Patton looked up and was surprised to see Lord Ignis staring at him, book left open and face-down on the table. “You’ve been silent since you finished your eggs. I assumed you were just shy about the noises you were making, so I looked up to remind you that it’s okay, just to find you cringing as you ate your bacon. Is there something wrong with it? Did I burn or overseason it?”

Patton’s eyes went wide. He didn’t mean to insult his cooking! “No, there’s nothing wrong with it!” Patton slapped his hand over his mouth, not meaning to be so loud with his response. Lord Ignis stared for a moment, and Patton squirmed in his seat.

Finally, Lord Ignis spoke. “Do you not like bacon?” Patton looked down at his lap, ashamed. “It’s okay, you don’t have to enjoy everything you eat. Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve made you something else.”

Patton played with the sleeves of his shirt. “I’ve never had bacon before, so I didn’t know-”

His Fairy Godfather interrupted him. “I assumed that. I meant why you didn’t tell me after you took the first bite. Why did you keep eating it?”

Patton shrugged. “You said this was for me to eat, and you spent all that time making it…”

His Fairy Godfather sighed. “I’m not going to be upset if you don’t like my cooking, and I won’t force you to eat something you don’t like.” He placed the cover back on the bacon dish. “I’ll give this to my brother later. He’ll eat any spare meat.” Patton frowned, still slightly upset. His Fairy Godfather gestured to the jams. “Why don’t you try some jam on your toast? Is there a specific flavor that you’re wanting to try?”

Patton looked at the jams. He recognized a few of them from the jams his mother ate with breakfast, but a few of them were unfamiliar to him. He picked up a jar of reddish-purple jam, carefully spreading it onto the toast. He took a small bite, and moaned at the burst of flavor. He couldn’t even find himself to be embarrassed, the jam tasting like heaven to him. He quickly took a bigger bite, then another, then another-

His Fairy Godfather chuckled. “I see someone has a sweet tooth.” Patton looked down and blushed, the entire slice of toast already eaten. He suddenly groaned, clutching his stomach. “Are you full?” Patton cocked his head to the side, staring at his stomach. His skin felt pleasantly tight, and he could feel a small bump that wasn’t there before. Is this what being full feels like? Patton smiled at the thought, deciding to nod his head. He looked back at the toast, the thought of taking another bite making him feel queasy. Lord Ignis stood up, holding out his hand. “Then may I escort you to your room, young one?”

Patton giggled at the dramatic tone, holding his hand. They made their way back to Patton’s room, where a pile of books sat outside of the door. Lord Ignis chuckled. “Do you remember the Fae with the blue accessories, the one that let your father call him Glacies?” Patton nodded. “He’s quite knowledgeable when it comes to most topics, so I asked him if he could teach you some basics in Fae culture so there’s no accidental miscommunication. However, he’s rather shy, preferring the world of books over people. He probably sent these books for you to read instead.” He picked up the journal and pen from the top of the pile. “And he probably enchanted this to copy any question you write into his journal, so he can see what questions you have and send books with answers.” He chuckled, shaking his head. “That kid will do anything to get out of talking to people.”

Patton looked at the books curiously, staring at the odd squiggles. What do they say?

Lord Ignis turned to look at him, and Patton belatedly realized that he said that outloud. “Can you not read in English?”

Patton shook his head. “Our old chef taught me how to read from the cookbooks he kept in the kitchen, but they didn’t look like that.”

Lord Ignis held out the journal and pen. “Well, can you write a few words from the cookbook on this so I know what language it is?”

Patton tried to remember what the words looked like, but everything was blurry. Besides, there was a different issue. “I don’t know how.”

Lord Ignis tilted his head in confusion before he figured it out. “You don’t know how to write?”

Patton shrugged, finding his shoes suddenly interesting. “Writing wasn’t necessary for cleaning and cooking.”

There was a brief moment of silence before Lord Ignis opened the door. “Well, I’ll just have to find the cookbook and figure out what language it’s in! Then we can help you learn how to read and write in English.” He led Patton back to his bed, gently tugging his shoes off. “Is there anything you would like me to retrieve for you while I’m there?”

Patton thought for a moment before shaking his head. He had no spare changes of clothes there (not that he needed it) and he wasn’t allowed to have any personal belongings. He used to have a small box of treasures that he hid under his cot, filled with pretty beads, feathers, and glass shards that he’d stumble across. But Patton’s mother had found it weeks ago, destroying the bax and beating him until he passed out.

“Alright, then I’ll leave you to get some rest.” Patton looked back up as Lord Ignis put his shoes in the closet.

Patton yawned, the soft sheets combined with a full belly making him sleepy. “Thank you, Lord Ignis.”

“I would prefer if you continue to call me Fairy Godfather, or ‘Prince’ if you want fewer syllables.”

Patton smiled, curling up under the blankets. “Then thank you, Fairy Godfather.”

Prince smiled, turning to leave. “I should have the books translated before you wake up. Make sure you call out if you need me.” And with that, he left.

Patton smiled, snuggling into the blankets, quickly falling asleep.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taglist: @bisexualdisaster106 @self-taught-mess @arodynamic-enby @sanderssides-angst

[wildselkie]

Top 10 Scenes in TDP Season 1 (pt. 1/3)

Top 10 Scenes in TDP Season 1 (pt. 1/3)

*not ordered in which is better or worse, but it will be in chronological order*

Also some things are worded weirdly. I have a pain in the ass time trying to get my thoughts across in words so... I thank you for your patience :))

_________________________________________

1) The scene where Callum, Ezran, and Rayla find the dragon prince. Ep. 2

I think this is one of the more pivotal moments in the show. I mean it is literally the scene that sets the story in motion after all! Two human princes, an elf assassin, and the lost dragon prince (who was thought to be dead/gone/egg destroyed(?)).. this is just IT.

*also i’m aware that Ez probably found the egg first cos he already knew about this secret area but still

2) Viren (attempts to) proposes the idea to trade his life in for Harrow. Ep. 3

Now there are other well thought and well written posts on this scene with Viren and Harrow, so I won't waste your time with all the gushy stuff. I find this scene important because it shows the lengths that Viren would go for his friend. Whether he's doing out of the goodness of his heart or some other selfish reason... maybe both(?)..

!WARNING! MINI VIREN POST ALERT EVEN THO I SAID I WOULDN'T GET INTO IT

In the book Moon, it dives deeper into the plot along with expressing the characters' thoughts and feelings. As for Viren, it's stated in the book that he wanted to:

"offer his life for Harrow's, but he wanted him to understand that this was more than just a sacrifice of a subject to his king. This was personal"

"... he would need to be straightforward. He wanted to say simply I love you and I will die for you" (Ehasz 80).

I have no doubts that Viren didn't not love Harrow or anything of the sorts, but at the same time it feels like there was another motive. Maybe there was, who knows.

All we know about Viren is that he's a father of two (Claudia & Soren), divorced/ separated from his wife, and he's a dark mage. Of course there's some more (like he's taller than Harrow according to the character line up)... also his staff... like if you look at it, it's the same one as the mage who faced Sol Regem all those centuries (?) ago. Maybe he's related to him, or possibly descended from one of the followers. I'd imagine that teaching dark magic may be a thing within his family and ancestors... he taught Claudia dark magic. That doesn't prove anything but it's a small thought.

ANYWAY-- this scene is one of many scenes that show Viren in a vulnerable state. The book gives a look into how he felt when he decided to sacrifice himself and everything. It's just interesting and I'm here for it. 

3) Amaya and her weapons grade baguette Ep. 4

On a less serious and more fun note, the fact that Amaya is a breakfast connoisseur is just perfect. Amazing. Fantabulous.

"As a breakfast connoisseur, she was offended that Ezran would neglect a hearty morning meal" (Ehasz 120).

I only emboldened and italicized "offended" because in the show YOU CAN LITERALLY SEE HER FACE WHEN EZ TELLS HER.

Bruh she was so offended lmaooo

It's right at 13:36 time in the show... the slow zoom in and all 😂

4) Amaya and Gren meeting Viren at the statue Ep. 5

I’m trying to see if I should have paired this with the first scene where Amaya arrives first. That scene is pretty calm but has a somber feeling. It introduces the relationship of Amaya and Sarai without having to directly say it. 

But this scene here is... interesting. Not in a good way or bad way, but we see they’re reminiscing of the past. At some point, they all got along nicely. Callum even noted in his spellbook that Viren’s family became like a second family to him when he moved to the castle. 

This interaction was cute tho. It started out positive (sort of) with them joking about Viren eating the last jelly tart which pissed Sarai off lol. But then Viren went on to apologize to Amaya and reassured her that what he does is out of the goodness of his heart and love for Katolis. But...

“Aaaaand, he’s back, Amaya thought” (Ehasz 150). 

And then went on to sign that he’s on a bunch of bs. See? Even Amaya knows he’s full of shit lol. But really tho... it makes me wonder how much of bs Viren goes on even before the events of the current story line. 

5) Rayla saves Bait from the sea monster Ep. 5

Let us give a round of applause for Rayla going against her fear of water to save Bait, the grumpy frog who hates her. I think this just goes to show how compassionate Rayla really is. This would include the time when she goes back to grab bait back in the banther lodge in episode 4. 

6) Viren giving his kids their *secret* missions Ep. 6

Okay this isn’t just one scene. I cheated yeah yeah whatever >:3

When Viren is telling Soren what he must do when he finds the princes, at first he doesn’t fully get it, but then.. OH n0

Viren’s intentions are starting to unfold and come together as one. Like, this man just told his own SON that should he find the princes, he should kill them. This 18 yr old bby 

bruh

And Viren didn’t say it aloud, but he heavily implied it. Only to then gaslight him later on when Claudia confronts him in prison. 

As for Claudia, Viren tells her that she must retrieve the egg. And do everything in her power to bring it back, even if it means that she’ll have to sacrifice Soren... her own damn brother ;-;

7) When Callum finally lets Rayla hold the egg Ep. 6

This scene is pretty big. Rayla knows that Harrow is long gone and is trying to find a way to tell them. Obviously she doesn’t choose the best time to try it.

They were in a dire situation that could potentially kill them (even tho they had plenty of those moments already). The reason why this scene is so big is because it shows her struggle to break the bad news (ever since the right binding fell) as she continues to grow closer to them. Here you can see Callum passing the egg to her, despite her hand being in the terrible state that it is in. It is also the scene where right before passing it, he finally tells Rayla that he trusts her. 

8) Human Rayla!! Ep. 7

Human Rayla is so corny but it’s the good kind of corny. One of the best comedic jokes in the series! 

That is all cos human Rayla needs an AU of being a nighttime tv host or smthg

9) Viren and Runaan Ep. 8

yo this is alot okay. The scenes with these two introduced some Moonshadow philosophy and such (ie. not being scared of death). Runaan being the stoic and serious assassin that he is. And Viren not having any of this shit. 

There are three major things here:

 Runaan knows about the mirror and is most likely aware of who Aaravos is. He literally says, “That mirror? You have found something worse than death.” Goddamn...

And then Viren just... trapped his soul.. his essence into a goddamn coin. Just like that? wow. And hold it, almost admiring it in front of Gren. 

Also this is the first time we officially see Viren in that form. In the beginning of episode 5 we are given a darkened silhouette of Viren and the butterflies. But here we see the damage resulted from years of having done dark magic, and it’s horrifying. He is the high mage and all but goddamn. I mean with every action there are consequences so- 

10) Callum destroying the primal stone Ep. 9

I feel like this is one of the “of course it’s this one!” scenes but it really is! Callum realizes that only a sky dragon can be hatched in the eye of storm and there he is with a literal storm in his hand. By now, Callum has come to understanding what feels right and that being a mage is his destiny. But he also understands that he needs to sacrifice some things for new beginnings. This whole journey was to get the lost dragon prince home and restore balance and peace and with the egg starting to die... well you can’t really do that without the egg. 

It’s at 18:50 where he realizes all of this. It’s one of the big boy moments in the show. Seriously, it’s a big moment and the suspension helped get the feels in. And we got a cute baby dragon!! 

End, begin. it’s all the same. (pls someone get that reference ;-;;;)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Some honorable mentions:

- Episode 7: Claudia and Soren interacting. I love their sibling bond; it’s so silly and sweet and I love it. It makes me wish I had an older brother of some sort. 

Ellis and Ava,, I like the flashback story given when they meet the dragang. I just like it, okay? Smol chiald w/ smol wolf pup and a hippie Lujaane seeing the beauty & strength in Ava. 

CGI Coran. That all I have to say about that guy lmao

- Episode 8: When the group is going up the cursed caldera and they encounter that giant leech. Like can we just appreciate Callum’s funny way of making out a plan? Fat respect for that. 

Another is when the group split up and waited for the leech to leave. The conversation between Ellis and Callum were sweet as was the one between Rayla and Ez. I loved Ellis’s admiration for Callum being a mage. And her expectations of what a mage was is pretty hilarious. So wholesome. The same goes for Ez when he gave Rayla that daily fill of positivity. 

Like... Ellis is telling Callum how smart and confident and cool he is. And meanwhile Callum is like... it’s not me, it’s this. *whips out primal stone* And she goes on to tell him that she believe he’ll be amazing with or without the stone. 

And Rayla is telling Ez how she failed in her job of killing the enemy. And Ez is telling her how she’s awesome at everything she does.

this is the positive wholesome shit I come for like... this is parallels but GODDAMNIT it’s so.. ;;;;-;;

Yo this is long ENOUGH! Thank you so damn much if you read to the end. You’re the real beauties. Anywho... uh parts 2 and 3 will be up soon. 

 It’s 11 now so I need some sleep. goodnight kids

[one-abuse-survivor]

(TW for eating disorders.) First of all, I just want to say thank you for creating this blog as a safe space. You’ve given folk who more often than not have had their voices taken away a place of validation, comfort, and love. I wish you love, healing, and safety, especially with the times we live in now. (I also hope you don’t mind if I also come back sometime because there’s a lot more I’d like to talk about, but I feel like we’d be here all day if I’d unpack everything all in one go.) (1/16)

I’ve had an on-and-off eating disorder for the last 2 or 3 years, solely prompted by my dad offhandedly commenting about my weight. I don’t even remember what he even told me specifically, but ever since then, I’ve been torturing myself with starvation, purging, and over-exercising to compensate for a relatively minor incident I don’t think my dad even remembers happened. (2/16)

My dad has been emotionally and verbally abusive to me since I was young. Because of his abuse, I suffer from severe depression (though I believe I might have other mental illnesses due to some of my behaviors being similar to other disorders). And because of my depression, I’ve lost so much. (3/16)  

I’ve lost a fair amount of my childhood memories to memory loss (the ones I can primarily remember are traumatic incidents with him), lost any consistent feeling of stability and hope for the future, and nearly lost my life to a suicide attempt that he prompted & was actually there to witness – it’s been 3 years since then and I don’t think he’ll ever take the blame or even acknowledge it happened. (4/16)

What I hate him the most for though is the fact that he took away my ability to feel truly confident in myself, culminating in my eating disorder. I don’t remember it clearly, but I remember it all started when we were sitting at the dinner table with the rest of my family. (5/16)

He asked me, “Anon, what’s your height and weight?” I told him, and when he did, he pulled out his phone, calculated my BMI, read it out loud, and said something along the lines of “You’re overweight. You need to exercise more.” He said that in front of my other family members. I felt absolutely humiliated. (6/16)

(I know he said something more about my weight and that I argued with him about it a little, but my memory fails me. It sucks when my brain involuntarily decides to suppress and blur memories just to save me from the pain and trauma of remembering them again.) (7/16)

Looking back, it was extremely petty to the point I’m ashamed of it, but as revenge, I started indirectly and directly calling him a “fat pig”. (My father’s actually overweight as well.) I remember when he asked me if I wanted to eat a plate full of bacon with eggs for breakfast, I told him “That much bacon? You’re such a pig!” The satisfaction and petty happiness I got every time I called him out and insulted him only lasted in those moments, though. (8/16)

Now, for context, I’ve always been overweight since childhood – and still am to this day. I mostly pass it off in the form of jokes to my friends and never tell my family about it (except for my brother), but I’ve always had a deep-seated hatred for how I look and how fat I am. I don’t think it would be out of bounds to say that my negative obsession with my weight and appearance has controlled and borderline ruined my life. (9/16)

But that incident at the dinner table, eating as normal with my family, was what really tipped me off the edge. While it only started small, my eating disorder has gradually grown worse since then – and now it’s come back at its absolute worst. (10/16)

Today has been the first day in at least a week (if not longer) that I’ve eaten anything close to a solid meal, and with the relapse of my eating disorder I think it might stay the only real meal I’ll eat for a long while. I’ve taken up exercising for two hours a day to burn off the extra calories, to the point I actually end up burning what little food I ate & suffer through the pain of an empty stomach after just to feel the satisfaction of my body eating away at itself. (11/16)

My brother (who I’ve told about my eating disorder in the past) has become suspicious and concerned about my weird eating patterns and constant exercise, but I’ve managed to pass it off as my depression screwing with my appetite and my simple want to just exercise since I’ve had nothing much to do in quarantine. I’ve said the same to the rest of my family. (12/16)

To my family, I’m on the right track. I’m getting better. I’m healthier. I’m happier. But I’m far from it. I claw at my bulging stomach and stretch marks until my skin goes red because it isn’t flat. I’ve pushed my legs to the point they cramp, ache, and tremble almost daily from my rigorous exercising. Every time I eat a solid meal and feel full, I beat myself up for eating too much when that hardly is (or just isn’t) the case. (13/16)

What I hate the most is that I’m actually happy I’m suffering, because at least through my pain I’ve begun to see results. My arms and wrists seem unbelievably thin, to the point I have to look at them and marvel at them sometimes at how they seem so skinny. Same goes for my legs and chest. But not my stomach. I absolutely loathe my stomach and wish for nothing more than for it to be flat. (14/16)

I know I’m sick. I know I’m in pain. I know I need help. But I don’t want to get help because my abusive household is hardly a place to get actual help, and aside from that, I’ve told myself “Why do I need help when this is already working? I’m finally getting thinner and prettier, I’m helping myself! Why do I need help for the help I’m already giving myself?” (15/16) 

Once again, thank you so so much for listening. My best wishes for you, and for any person that reads this. (16/16)

-----

Hi! Thank you so much for your kind words ❤ it makes me really happy to be able to help others, and this blog has helped me immensely as well. I absolutely do not mind if you send me more asks in the future!

As you can imagine, I’m not qualified to help with something as complex as this at all, and I agree that you need (and deserve!) professional help. But I also agree that your abusive household is hardly a place where you can get better even with help, and even though I’ve never had an eating disorder, I resonate a some of your experiences, especially with the feeling of wanting to punish yourself because of your parents’ comments about you. And I also resonate with the whole rationally knowing that you’re not okay and that there’s an explanation for everything you feel, but not wanting to fix any of it because hurting brings comfort and you feel like you deserve the pain you’re going through anyway. 

I’m sending you all the hugs and strength I have to spare, and a reminder that none of what’s happening is your fault. So even if your ED makes you feel guilt, I really hope you don’t feel any extra guilt for the fact that you’re struggling with it; that’s on your dad and his abuse toward you. You’re doing the best you can in the traumatising situation that you’re in.

Oh, and about calling your dad a pig: I think we’ve all had these kinds of petty moments growing up, especially if we were being bullied or abused and hadn’t learned any other ways of defending/standing for ourselves. You grow out of these things; it’s okay. Don’t beat yourself too much for it. ❤

[raven0fthenight]

A Single Temptation

Crowley hadn’t meant for things to happen this way, but he just couldn’t resist the temptation. It had been a normal day and Crowley had been driving through London on his way to the bookshop when a notice in a nearby store had caught his eye. ‘Giving away baby snakes!’ he had of course been immediately interested.

Crowley rushed inside the building and made a worker guide him to the place where the baby snakes were being kept for adoption. He had been immediately greeted by five small white eggs in a tank. Next to the tank was a small pamphlet with a picture of a ball python on the cover.  Crowley picked it up and found that it was about how to take care of snakes. While he didn’t usually like reading informative texts, he found himself quickly absorbed in the words in the pamphlet. After reading the pamphlet a few times, Crowley flagged down a worker and asked if he could have the snake eggs. The worker, of course, said that he could adopt them and soon Crowley found himself driving home with five small snake eggs.

As soon as he arrived back at his flat, he rushed into the plant room and miracled up a tank for the snake eggs and filled the bottom with a thin layer of dirt. He also put in a few tree branches for climbing and the like. A final demonic miracle and the tank would always have the perfect environment- humidity, temperature and the like. In the pamphlet, it had mentioned that wild ball pythons typically sit on the eggs until they hatch and Crowley rather liked the idea of being the one to protect the eggs. He gently placed the five eggs into the tank and went into his snake form, making sure he was small enough to fit into the tank with them. He slithered toward the eggs and protectively curled around them.

The pet store had told Crowley that it would take about a month or two for the eggs and he was fully prepared to sit there for as long as it took. It’s not like he needed to eat or sleep, he was a supernatural entity after all. Though, it might be a little difficult to explain to Aziraphale why he couldn’t hang out with him for lunch. Oh well, he’d think about that when it came to that.

~~~

About six weeks had passed when the snake eggs finally hatched. Crowley had been curled around them as usual when he had noticed a small fang poke through the shell of one of the five eggs. He had, of course, immediately slithered off of them and climbed out of the tank before transforming back into his human form- he didn’t want to accidentally hurt them.

Crowley watched in fascination as the baby snake pushed its small head through the shell of the egg and smelled the air with its tongue. Then it started to wiggle its way out of the egg until it finally freed its whole body. To be honest, his heart melted at the sight of the small baby snake- not that he would admit that to anyone. He leaned down over the tank and hesitantly picked up the baby snake. It instantly curled up in his hand, barely filling half his palm. Crowley lifted his hand toward his face so he could examine the snake more closely and found that it had adorable brown eyes and was a light brown with yellow markings and spots covering it.

The snake lifted its head and looked into Crowley’s eyes before curling back into his hand. He gently set it back down in the tank and waited for the other eggs to hatch. Within an hour, four more snakes had slithered out of their eggs and into the tank. Crowley had quickly picked up the remaining eggshells and disposed of them before going back to silently watching over the baby snakes- his baby snakes. Soon after they all hatched, a thought crossed Crowley’s mind.

“Should I tell Aziraphale about the baby snakes? I mean, he could help me take care of them but he might think that I’m… nice for adopting and caring for the baby snakes,” Crowley muttered while pacing back and forth through his flat. “Oh well, he’ll find out some way or another, I might as well get it over with.” Crowley sighed in disdain and walked over to his phone before dialing Aziraphale.

“Hello, this is Aziraphale speaking, how can I help you?” Aziraphale’s voice echoed through the phone.

“Hey angel, I was wondering if-“ Crowley was cut off by Aziraphale.

“Crowley! I haven’t heard from you in over a month- are you okay dear?” Aziraphale sounded quite worried.

“No no no, I’m fine angel,” Crowley reassured Aziraphale. They had both been on edge since the whole Heaven and Hell deal and were expecting them to drop by soon, but that wasn’t important at the moment. What was important was that Crowley still had to tell Aziraphale about the baby snakes. “Come over to my flat in ten minutes, okay?” Crowley blurted out and hung up the phone, face flushed red in embarrassment. “I can’t believe I thought this was a good idea,” he muttered to himself bitterly. Surprisingly, Aziraphale showed up at Crowley’s flat in only a few minutes. Crowley had been in the middle of attempting to calm himself down when a knocking on his front door had brought him out of his thoughts. He rushed to the front door and took a deep breath before opening the door. Imagine his surprise when he saw a slightly disheveled Aziraphale who appeared to be a little out of breath.

“Angel…” Crowley started before trailing off.

“I came as fast as I could! Is everything okay? Are you okay? Are you hurt in any way or-“ Aziraphale started rambling before Crowley cut him off.

“Angel, you’re rambling,” Crowley states and places his hand gently on Aziraphale’s shoulder in an attempt to calm him down.

“Ah sorry, I guess I’m just a little worked up,” Aziraphale flushed in embarrassment and looked shyly to the side.

“Well everything is fine, I just uh, had something to tell you,” Crowley explained, taking his hand off of Aziraphale’s shoulder. “Come on inside, angel.” Crowley led Aziraphale into his flat and stopped just outside the plant room.

“Promise you won’t laugh or call me nice or something if I show you?” Crowley questioned, unsure of what Aziraphale’s reaction would be.

“Why would I ever-“ Aziraphale started but Crowley cut him off with a glare. “Alright, I promise I won’t,” Aziraphale reassured him with a small smile.

“Fine then, come on in angel,” Crowley said and led Aziraphale into the room. He watched Azirapahle look around and noticed how his eyes widened in surprise when he finally noticed the tank.

“Oh,” Aziraphale breathed out and rushed over to the tank to kneel by it. “They’re so small.”

Crowley hummed a noncommittal noise of agreement and watched as Aziraphale leaned closer to the tank to study them.

“You can hold one if you want,” Crowley suggested and Aziraphale positively lit up.

“Where did you find them?” Aziraphale asked and turned toward Crowley with his eyes full of wonder and a small snake draped over his hand.

“Saw a sign that said ‘giving away snakes’ and I figured I might as well get some- I hatched them myself, you know?” Crowley explained, adding on the last part as a second thought.

“You did?” Aziraphale exclaimed, eyes wide in shock and Crowley nodded. “Really.”

“Of course, why else do you think I wasn’t answering your calls for a few weeks?” Crowley joked, earning an exasperated sigh from Aziraphale.

“Aren’t you a cute little snake,” Aziraphale cooed to the snake that he was holding. “Do you know what breed they are?”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure that they’re banana morph ball pythons,” Crowley stated.

“Ah, well they are simply adorable,” Aziraphale said and Crowley felt a small rush of pride- they were his snakes after all. “How big do they get? Oh, what do they eat? Do you think I could keep one in the bookshop? Maybe they could scare away some of the customers…” Aziraphale started rambling again.

“They get to be around 4-6 feet, they eat crickets when they’re babies and mice when they’re grown, and yes you could probably scare away customers with one if I let you take one- if.” Crowley quickly answered all of Aziraphale’s questions, hissing out the last word.

“Oh, but they would be so nice to have around the shop, please dear?” Aziraphale pleaded and Crowley had to look away or else he’d fall victim to the puppy dog eyes that Aziraphale was so fond of using. “Come on, I’ll help you take care of them!”

“Fine, but only when they’re fully grown, I don’t want them getting lost in your bookshop,” Crowley relented with a sigh of resignation.

“Thank you, dear!” Aziraphale beamed at Crowley before turning his attention back to the little snakes. “We can be godfathers again…” Aziraphale murmured, so soft that Crowley had barely heard it.

“Of course angel, anything for you.”

-------

This is a request I did for @aziraphaleisagender, I hope you like it!

Also posted (here) on AO3

[khruseosold]

IN — CHARACTER : QUESTIONNAIRE.

Muse: Jace Herondale

1. What does your muse smell like?  

Dust, ash, sweat, ichor and/or blood— think I’m exaggerating? Part of me wishes that I was. There’s a certain smell to Jace that encapsulates the aftermath of what he, as a Nephilim, was trained his entire life to do and excel at: demon-hunting. The remnants of all of the aforementioned taint his clothing, skin and hair alike, and they often linger easily for quite some time as a whole, as he’s never exactly in a rush to rid himself of it (taking two showers a day is not exactly a thing he’s drawn to). And as one of his habits definitely include invading personal space (especially when he becomes perfectly aware that it’s much to a person’s dismay) just enough for the act to not be of mutual annoyance, there are plenty of people who’ve likely become far more than well-acquainted with it. Sorry, Alec (even if Jace disagrees with said apology).

2. How often does your muse bathe / shower? Any habits?

Daily if it’s within his capabilities, with a very definite and strong preference to taking one towards the end of the day once he’s returned to the institute. But it’s one, and generally one alone— he’s not exempt to excessive groans if he somehow needs a second one. He is, however, not in much of a rush to take one and is perfectly capable of delaying it until much later on in the evening. On that note, his reasoning to ultimately get up and take one often isn’t even linked to the fact that he’s rather, well, let’s face it, dirty by the end of his ‘escapades’, it’s the fact that it’s a place of peace and quiet, of serenity which is something he’s very adamant about once he retreats to his room at the institute. It’s almost a ritual of cleansing, even if he, himself, wouldn’t personally reference it by any such terminology. But it is, quite literally, the act of water rinsing the weight off his shoulders, even if it never quite manages to do so. But that’s a topic for another day.

3. Does your muse have any tattoos or piercings?

Jace bears numerous runes inked across different parts of his body, these are, in essence, marks that the Nephilim are able to draw upon themselves with aid of their own stele, and these runes work as empowerment and protection of the wearer in question, or various other uses (as there are thousands). When freshly drawn, these runes will appear black, similarly to tattoos, but most fade over-time until they appear as nothing more but silvery-white scars. Jace (if unglamoured) wears two permanent runes in plain sight that retain their dark appearance on one hand and the forearm on the other, and is, at any given time, covered in scars of old-worn runes. Beyond those, there are no proper tattoos nor piercings on him. As he likes to point out, his good looks are all ‘au naturel’.

4. Any body movement quirks (ex: leg shaking)?  

Funny one would ask— yes to the question, a lesser yes to the example given and yes to likely numerous other examples you could name. Jace, while not seemingly one of visible nervousness of any kind (nor is he consciously one who’s is agitated) does live up to quirks that stem from both. Though I wouldn’t exactly account either of the terms to him and his mindset, and I’d much rather opt for the terminology of being ‘restless’. He’s rather of a soul who requires physical exertion as to be most comfortable— and this comes out through numerous smaller ticks that many wouldn’t even quite notice unless they surveyed him with scrutiny (as Clary has done to some level). The primary one (and I see this as a bit of a rule of thumb) is that very often, a part of Jace  is always active. If it isn’t him physically in one way or another, it’ll be his mind (which is why he’s always so incredibly quick-witted and sarcastic, he’s very quick mentally); but you’ll also find that he’s prone to keeping an object in motion, especially during moments when he’s just standing around and waiting. This can be him pulling at a loose thread in the pockets of his jeans, rotating his stele when he’s holding but not using it, the occasional shake of his leg when he’s sitting somewhere and he has his legs crossed (the foot on knee variant), running his fingers through his hair as to push it back, etc. These decrease substantially however once he meets Clary and especially, as they progress in their relationship and he’s physically around her.

5. What do they sleep in?  

Especially before the timeline and the beginning of the Mortal Instruments, he sleeps in his full jammies, as he likes to refer to them as. But it seems it’s not a strict habit by any means, and especially as time progresses, he definitely strays from the custom. It becomes more common for him to sleep, for example, shirtless with long pyjama bottoms.

6. What’s their favourite piece of clothing?

Jace was/is immense about his leather jackets, and he did lose a heavy favourite among favourites during the timeline of City of Ashes, which he was decently/relatively dramatic about no longer having. Beyond that, the guy occasionally has a favourite shirt, but they come and go— usually ones that’re somewhat loose-fitting but not overly so at all. In truth, many of Jace’s ‘favourites’ among his attire often tend to become favourites when they’ve fallen victim to ichor (or similar) or he’s lost them in one way or another.

7. What do they do when they wake up ?  

Cassandra Clare likes to point out how Jace is barefoot way more often than he’s not— so I’m going to make this an issue of equal significance. He lazes through the hallways of the Institute, all the way to the kitchen— wholly ignoring Isabelle if she’s in there already with yet another attempt at the furnace; and peeks if the refrigerator if there’s any left-overs from the previous evening/night. If not, then he resorts to candy bars he can find left and right and if one raven-haired Lightwood is, in fact, not in said kitchen, he’ll prepare himself some eggs for the protein and immense nutrients in them; his go-to. Then he’s far from exempt of lazing around some more, primarily in the library before he heads to the training room for numerous hours, if patrols aren’t yet called for. And by then, it’s usually Taki’s. Have I mentioned that despite being in tip-top shape physically, he actually has immensely horrible eating (and such) habits and I wonder how he accomplishes everything he does, with them?

8. How do they sleep? Position?

Pre-Clary or? Prior to her in his life, there is no set way or position to how he sleeps. In the midst of a room that is way too organised and clean to a point where it seems no one actually inhabits it— when he sleeps, he’s not the most orderly. He sleeps in a variety of positions, depending on his state of mind at the time, though the periods of lighter sleep are definitely spent on his back. When Clary comes into his life and they form a proper couple in the later half of the series, he tends to default to his side as to be able to wrap his arms around her waist, regardless of whether she’s facing him or not; though they commonly fall asleep facing one another.

9. What do their hands feel like?

While a warrior through and through bone and blood alike, it’s only the texture of them which live up to it. His fingertips are calloused, though not by any means severely, there are some scars on the very top of one in particular, remnants and scarring of the occasional temporary rune. Beyond that, one would not truly be able to tell; he has an artist’s hands; very slender with fingers relatively long and he’s very fluid in the movements of them— they’re described as being much more fitting as the hands of a pianist, rather than of a warrior, which tends to come as a continuous surprise to Clary.

10. If you kissed them, what would they usually taste like?

I don’t know, what does he taste like when you kiss him, Clary? (cough, cough, @freckledsnack) 

Tagged by: Good question, believe both @loialte and @murroyilodel tagged me. Ily both. <3 Tagging: @loialte (listen, you can do it for Jace’s parabatai; your turn). @freckledsnack again because well, Jace’s other half, @logiclaire, @marblecarved (Obara), @diguerra (Nym), @tocxmply (come on Fil, give me a novel on Bucky), @hakune (Simon; though if you want, you can also do Steve), @lcdgerbled / @snakedhand, @trickstercaptain / @immobiliter (Pep), @empireburned (Peggy).

[gallymagines]

Make Me Remember - Gally x Reader Part 10

Word Count: 2.5K

Warnings: None

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9

Y/N’s POV:

Rolling over the light of the sun hits my eyes. Ugh, I don’t want to get up. I tap the bed to the left of me and find empty space. Where’s Gally? Oh, right the meeting. I get up out of my bed and put on my work clothes ready to get breakfast with Gally. I walk out of my hut and towards the Homestead but as I do I get a lot of glances from the other gladers. What is it this time? As I continue on my way I am greeted by Newt.

“Good morning, Y/N,” He says

“Good morning Newt!” I reply happily

“So today the keepers had a meeting to decide what your job will be.” Newt states

“Oh, so what am I?” I ask

“You’ve been assigned to be a track-hoe,” He answers

“Oh. Okay.” I reply “Well thanks. I’m off to get some breakfast, see you after!”

I’m a bit bummed. I mean I know I’m not that strong but I thought just maybe I would get to stay with Gally as a builder. Oh well, I get it. They want me in a job where I’ll do well, so I guess it’s okay. As I start to walk away Newt yells,

“Wait! There’s one more thing though!” 

“We’re both track-hoes, tell me later!” I yell back

I then make my way to the kitchen to grab some breakfast. Taking a plate of bacon and eggs I make my way over to a table to sit. As I start to eat I see Gally walk into the kitchen. I smile at him and wave him to come over.

Gally’s POV:

After finally forcing my feet to move out of the gathering room, I make my way over to the kitchen to grab some breakfast before work. When I walk in I see Y/N sitting at a table. She smiles at me and waves me to come over to the table. I grab some food and then with my head down walk over to sit with her. This is all the time I get until dinner. This is all the time we get, so why is she so happy?

“Good morning!” Y/N says

“Yeah...good morning,” I reply

She gives me a confused look. What is there to be confused about? We can’t see each other.

“Gally, are you okay?”

She reaches out and touches my hand, but I yank it back. Y/N seems surprised by the gesture but I’m too upset to change anything. She calls me her best friend and yet she’s fine with us being separated like this. 

“What’s wrong, Gally? You were so happy earlier...” She says in a hushed tone

“Yeah. I was happy and I don’t understand how you can be with everything going on!” I yell curtly

 Y/N flinches away as I yell and when she looks back I can see tears forming in her eyes. I try to switch gears and softly say,

“Y/N...I-”

She stands up from the table and I try to reach out to her but she steps away. The tears start to form trails down her cheeks as she exclaims,

“I...I don’t understand what’s gotten into you!”

She then walks away from the table and out of the kitchen. I sit back down and start to push my food around with a fork when Newt approaches me.

“She seems upset. Did you tell her about the new separation rules?” He asks

“Did I what? No. Weren’t you supposed to?” I question back

“She ran off to see you. I never got the chance.” He replies

Oh no. What have I done? I put my head in my hands before remarking to Newt,

“Well don’t worry about it. It’s not like she’ll ever want to talk to me again anyway.”

I stand up from my uneaten plate and make my way past Newt. Exiting the kitchen I make my way towards the other builders. God. I’m such a slinthead. First I make it so we can barely see each other and now she probably won’t want to talk to me ever again! I’ve messed everything up! I’m so stupid! The more I think about the events of the morning the angrier I become. How could I let this happen? When I approach the builders I see their work so far.

“What is this?” I question sternly

“What do you mean? This is what you told us to do.” Eric says

“Well, it’s wrong. Everything is wrong. Tear it down.” I command

“But we just spent the last hour starting this-” Ben starts

“TEAR. IT. DOWN.” I yell

The other builders’ eyes go wide. They all turn and start to tear the foundation down. Rip it apart. It’s not like it was important. It’s not like anything is important.

Y/N POV:

As I make my way over to where the other track-hoes are I can’t help but think about Gally. I don’t understand what’s gotten into him. I mean last night he was comforting me after my nightmare and now he’s acting like a jerk. I mean I heard rumors that he wasn’t the nicest guy in the glade but he was nice to me so I didn’t believe them. I just...he was- he is my best friend. I don’t know what’s up with him, but I do know that I don’t like it. Maybe I should try talking to him later? I don’t know...I’m not in the mood to be yelled at again. Not by him at least. As I approach the other track-hoes Zart says,

“Hey Y/N! Ready for your first official day?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” I reply

“Well, we’ll start you off with something easy today. At his request, you’ll be helping Newt plant seeds.” Zart states

“Oh okay. So where is he?” I question

“Ah don’t worry. We give him some extra time to get here because of his limp and all. Just wait over by the bed you’ll be planting in, he’ll be here soon. ” Zart answers

Nodding my head I go and sit by the bed I’ll be working in. Patiently waiting, I rest my elbows on my knees and my head in my hands. I look around the glade. To my front, I can see bloodhouse and the tiny figures of slicers walking around. To my left, I can kind of make out the homestead and the gladers who work in that area. The cooks, the med-jacks...the builders. I see all their figures. Before I can think much more about any specific figures I might see by the Homestead Newt shows up and enthusiastically asks,

“Ready to work?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” I answer

Newt extends a hand to help me up. I grab his hand and stand before walking over to get the seeds we’ll be planting from Zart. Once I grab them Newt and I start to work. Maybe working will get my mind off of things. Hopefully...

***

Newt’s POV:

Taking a seat at one of the tables in the kitchen you can feel how tense the room is. It had been five days since Y/N had been assigned to be a track-hoe and Gally had been somewhat restricted from being around her. They hadn’t talked since whatever happened that first day. With each increasing day Y/N grew sadder and Gally...well he was himself just worse. Angrier and angrier each passing day and the smallest thing could trigger it. Speak of the devil, Gally walks into the dining hall area of the kitchen. He grabs his food but as he walks to go sit at a table with Ben one of the other gladers accidentally bumps his shoulder. He immediately turns around, drops his food on a table and starts yelling at the poor guy.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING SLINTHEAD?! IF YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST MESS WITH ME LIKE THAT THEN YOU’RE JACKED!”

Gally pushes the glader a bit before grabbing him by the shirt with one hand and raising a fist with another. 

“IF YOU WANT TO SHUCKING MESS WITH ME THEN YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE PUNISHMENT THAT COMES WITH IT SLINTHEAD.”

Some people rush over to stop Gally but he lowers his fist and lets go of the guy. Grabbing his plate he turns away and goes to sit with Ben. I look around to see why and there’s Y/N in the doorway walking to get food. Once she grabs her food she glances towards where Gally is sitting but he doesn’t look back. After she walks over to my table and sits facing me, I can see Gally across the room staring right at her. She turns to look, but he looks away before she can see he’s looking. It’s like a game, back and forth they look for each other gaze but turn away before either can catch it. Y/N finally relents and turns to her food. With her fork, she picks at it a bit but doesn’t eat much. 

“Love, you need to eat so you have the energy for work.” I try to convince her

“I’m not that hungry...” She mumbles

When she looks up from her plate, her eyes reflect the way she’s become. They’re dark and hollow. There’s a vacant emptiness to them. With each passing day, they lose more an more light. Not only that Y/N has been eating less and less. Her bright and bubbly energy is practically non-existent. I start to wonder if their separation is a good thing. Worried about her well-being I ask,

“Love, are you okay?”

“I...I just don’t get it. We would always hang out. Like, all the time but now he wants nothing to do with me. I...I don’t know why.” She responds, the sadness evident in her voice

“He’s just a hot head, he’ll come around love.” I try to comfort

She glances back at him and then to me. Shaking her head, she then puts it in her hands.

“I don’t know...” she whispers

“Well if you’re done then we should get going to the gardens,” I suggest

She nods her head slowly pushing an almost full plate of food away. We both exit the kitchen but not before she takes one glance back.

Ben’s POV:

It had been five days since Gally became more jacked than usual. I consider him a friend but he’s been acting like a real slinthead lately. I mean when he doesn’t like something he gets angry, that’s just him. But this. This wasn’t like his usual outbursts. These were different, to say the least. To most of the other gladers, they just thought that his temper was getting worse but I knew better than that. These outbursts didn’t come from a place of annoyance or frustration. They came from a place of hurt. It took me a while to figure it out, but while his voice is yelling with anger his eyes tell a different story. They’re sad and filled with longing. He misses Y/N. As I sit at a dining table eating my food and contemplating how to help my friend I see him walk in. Everyone’s been on edge lately and you can feel it in the air when he walks in. He grabs a plate of food and makes his way over to my table but not before another glader slightly bumps into him. Gally turns on his heels, dropping his plate on the table. You can tell the other guy is already nervous.

“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING SLINTHEAD?! IF YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST MESS WITH ME LIKE THAT THEN YOU’RE JACKED!” Gally yells

He pushes the other glader around and then grabs him by the shirt. While one hand tightly grasps the material of the shirt the other forms a fist and is raised in the air. Gally yells again,

“IF YOU WANT TO SHUCKING MESS WITH ME THEN YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THE PUNISHMENT THAT COMES WITH IT SLINTHEAD.” 

Some gladers rush to pull Gally off of the poor glader but he drops his hands before anyone does anything. He grabs his plate and heads over to my table. As he walks over I can spot Y/N in the doorway heading to grab food. She looks this way but I know she’s not looking at me. She looks away goes to sit with Newt. Once she’s facing away from our table though Gally turns to look at her, when she looks back he turns away. This back and forth goes on for a bit before Y/N stops looking.

“She hates me...” Gally mumbles

“Now I don’t think that’s true Gally. Why would she look at you if she hates you?” I question

“So she can point out how I hurt her feelings, and how I broke my promise and how I am is an angry slinthead.” He complains

“Have you tried talking to her?” I ask

“No. She already hates me, I don’t want her to hate me more. I...I couldn’t deal with that.” He states sadly

“But you don’t know for sure she hates you unless you talk to her so I think-” I start

“SHUT UP BEN!” he exclaims “I...I messed everything up. I can’t do anything now. It’s all...it’s all ruined.”

His voice drops at the end of his statement. I’ve never seen him like this. Just then Y/N and Newt get up to leave. I see her look back in our direction one more time before leaving. Gally doesn’t look until she’s gone. I turn my attention back to him.

“Listen you finish up your food. I’ll meet you at the building project.” I state before getting up and exiting the kitchen

I don’t make my way over to the building project though, I head towards the gardens. When I get close enough to see who is who I direct myself towards Y/N.

“Y/N, can we talk?” I ask

She turns around to look at me. She looks awful. Her posture is weak, her eyes are lifeless and when she responds her voice is barely audible.

“I guess so...” She sighs

“Will you please talk to Gally again? You need to. He hasn’t been himself since what happened. He’s been yelling at everyone over the littlest of things. I mean yeah he’s angry but he’s not destructive. Please.” I beg her

“I keep wanting to talk to him...but he won’t even look at me anymore. He just got so angry that one day for no reason and since then he’s avoided me. I...don't know what happened.” She explains

“Well Alby made a rule that you two could only see each other during breakfast and dinner and that’s it, so he-” I start but am cut off

“What rule? I didn’t hear about this!” She exclaims

“Newt was supposed to tell you,” I reply

She throws an angry glance his way and he looks back sheepishly.

“I’ll deal with him later but that doesn’t explain why Gally is ignoring me now.” She presses

“Well he didn’t know that you were unaware so when he talked to you that morning and you were so happy he got upset that you could be okay with being restricted. He didn’t find out until after that you didn’t know and he thought that he ruined the friendship so he just stopped talking.” I answer

“Oh no...but what do I do? He won’t look at me, let alone let me get close to him.” She says “Wait...I might have an idea.”

She waves me closer and puts a hand to my ear. She whispers the idea she was thinking to me. It might just work and boy I hope it does.

A/N: Hi everyone! I hope you like it feel free to tell me what you think! There are some surprises ahead so I hope you all keep reading!

[nextcassie]

Your Scent 5

Summary: Nothing could have prepared you for the shit storm that was your junior year of college. Discovering you were an omega was only the first discovery in a long line of complicated ones. Thank goodness Min Yoongi was there to help.A story about college and discovering what you like and don’t like in both romantic relationships and friendships.

Abo Au - University AU

Pairing: Main-Min Yoongi/Reader ; OT7/Reader

Chapter words: 5128

| 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |

Omega Biology

Females Female omegas are known to be incredibly fertile. They are known for being homemakers traditionally, but now are seen in a variety of different roles in society. When it comes to heat their bodies produce a lot of slick. Female Omegas are said to experience the worst waves during their heat, meaning that they tend to experience incredible moments of want and need before becoming incredibly tired.

Males Male omegas are a bit more complicated than female omegas. They were never looked down upon by society and were normally seen as incredibly useful in the work force for being receptive to emotions and male. They hold multiple reproductive organs. They have the ability to produce fertile sperm to impregnate females and they hold reproductive eggs. The eggs are located in a passage way off the rectum. However, male omegas can only get pregnant during heats when this passage way opens up and produces an ample amount of slick. While out of heat male omegas produce slick it is usually not enough to make anal sex completely comfortable and the use of lube is needed.

Warnings: Smut. It's so long because I got carried away with the smut. I guess there's dirty talk too. Be warned, it's kinky up in this story and will probs only get kinkier as we continue.

OO00OO

To say that Jimin was ecstatic about your agreement with Yoongi would be the understatement of the year. The other omega was practically skipping around your apartment in joy, claiming he was cupid. He hadn’t shut up about it all week. He was constantly hovering over you eagerly waiting for Yoongi to message you. It made you wonder if you were Yoongi’s heat partner or if Jimin was.

You were working on your laptop when an email popped up from Yoongi. You clicked on it and tried not to gasp. It was a long list of everything that the two of you could try together. It was slightly shocking at just how long it was and just how much of it you didn’t really understand.

 That meant you could either go through the trouble of translating it yourself or ask someone.

 You got up from the sofa in the living room and knocked on Jimin’s bedroom door.

 Jimin opened the door and when the two of you made eye contact he began to grin. He knew exactly why you had knocked on his door.

 “Do come in.”

 He opened the door and gestured for you to come inside. He moved to sit on his bed and leaned back against the wall before patting the space next to him with a knowing grin on his face. You moved to sit next to him with your laptop.

 “I can’t really understand this.”

 You showed him the email from Yoongi and watched as Jimin’s eyebrows raised as he read through the list.

 “I would say that this isn’t usually need to know Korean vocabulary,” he replied. “Actually, I’d be slightly concerned if you knew all these words as a non-native speaker. I’d question your reasons to coming to South Korea.”

 “Got it… So are you going to explain it to me or not?”

 Jimin dramatically cleared his throat.

 “He says that he is an experimental dom. If he doesn’t know about something he is willing to try it once before making a decision about if he likes it or not. He wants to keep things mellow for your first heat though. He’ll keep these things in mind if you guys decide you want to continue your relationship. Which you will.”

 “Jimin focus.”

 “Fine.” Jimin eyes the list again before continuing. “I feel so awkward reading this to you.”

 “I know it’s like some Fifty Shades of Grey shit,” you replied.

 “Yoongi is a way better dom than Christian Grey.”

 “So, you’ve slept with Yoongi?”

 “I’ve slept with all of my friends except for you. So yes, but if it makes you feel better he’s never helped through my heats. Actually, it’s not something Yoongi does too often…”

 “When was the last time you think he had a heat partner?”

 “Two years ago, I think.” Jimin seemed to think it over. “She was a nice girl and I think they may have had a thing that they never made official. He never let her help him through his ruts. Despite the fact that he’s incredibly liberal he still sees sex as an intimate act. He’ll go to Jin and Namjoon’s parties, but he won’t take someone home unless he knows and trusts them. It’s sort of a big deal that he agreed to this arrangement. I’m not surprised, but it’s not something that happens often. Don’t sell yourself short.”

 “Thanks for the confidence boost. It’s just sort of weird… I mean I’ve never been so attracted to another individual before.”

 “Physically or emotionally?”

 “Physically for sure, but I don’t know about emotionally. I haven’t really talked to him a lot. It’s just whenever I’m near him I just feel this sense of comfort wash over me. I just feel safe. I think it’s because he saved me at that party. I don’t want to rush and say I have feelings for him because there is a possibility that maybe that’s the only reason I’m attracted to him. I don’t want to be attracted to someone by who I think they are, but I want to be attracted to someone for who they really are. If that makes sense? I might have worded that weirdly.”

 “No, it makes sense.” Jimin smiled to himself a bit. “I think that once you get to know him, you’re going to realize how perfect you are for each other. Those words actually sounded like something Yoongi would say.”

 You thought about it and it did seem that the two of you had quite a bit in common when it came to attitudes. Neither of you were exactly high energy nor were the two of you overly affectionate. Yet you had a feeling that both of your friend groups would describe the two of you as caring people.

 “Okay, Park Jimin,” you stated with a smile. “In your expert opinion as Min Yoongi’s good friend what can I do to make him happy?”

 Jimin hummed as he rubbed his chin in thought. You had posed the question half joking, but you were curious to find out the answer he would give.

 “I guess the number one thing you can do is not to wake him up when he is sleeping. Hyung tends to keep weird hours because he writes at all hours of the day. Sometimes he forgets to eat and sleep when he gets really into writing. We all sort of take turns checking in on him. We’ll add you to the rotation now that you’re his heat partner now.”

 “That’s right… He’s a pretty successful composer. I forget about that sometimes because he just seems so down to earth about it. He just started working for some entertainment company, right?”

 “Yeah, he was doing mostly freelance because no one would meet his conditions for hiring him until now. Which leads me to number two, respect his music. It’s truly everything to him. If he asks you about something give your honest opinion. Hyung hates people who lie to him.”

 “That’s another thing the two of us have in common then,” you stated.

 “Number three, he’ll never admit it, but above all hyung is an alpha. I mean obviously, but he is high on the dominance spectrum and I think he feels like it’s something he should be ashamed of because he doesn’t want to hurt anyone. He’ll never ask you to, but sometimes just indulge his inner alpha.”

 “Okay, but what does indulging an alpha entail?”

 “In my experience, a lot of scent marking and letting them give you back hugs. It’s a bit different for every alpha though.”

 “I’ll keep it in mind. Thanks Jimin.”

 “Any time (y/n).”

 OO00OO

 Yoongi felt a bit awkward about all of this. It was time for his weekly review with his company. Normally, it entailed him getting feedback on the songs he was writing as well as talking about demos with the different trainees that he wanted to produce. He only worked with three of them because he worked mostly on hip hop tracks and there were only three of them that could rap to a tolerable level. Two of them were still a work in progress though.

 This time though, the conversation was going to have to be a bit different. He was going to have to turn in a heat partner form with your name and expected date of heat as well as the date of his next rut. Although it was now illegal to dismiss employees for things related to heats and ruts, it was still often looked down upon if someone took too much time off for them.

 Yoongi happened to feel comfortable at this job. He got his own small studio and found all the employees tolerable. He didn’t want to jeopardize any of that. In all honesty though, he thought you might be worth it.

 Yoongi’s father had always talked about how he knew from the second he met Yoongi’s mother it was her that he was going to mate with. While Yoongi wasn’t sure yet if he felt that strongly about you, but this was the closest he could remember to ever feeling this way.

 He knocked on the door and was told to come in. He opened the door to see his boss, Bang Shihyuk sitting at his desk. He preferred to be called Bang PD-nim instead of the CEO, but he almost completely ran the entire company.

 “Yoongi, it’s good to see you. How have the songs been coming along?” he asked, as Yoongi moved to take the seat in front of his desk.

 “They’re slowly coming along. I think I should have something for the trainees to record in about two weeks…”

 “I thought you would have something done by next week?” the main said with a furrowed brow.

 “About that, I’m going to need to take some time off,” Yoongi said. He slid the document he had filled out with the proper information over to the man.

 The man took it and his eyes scanned over it. Yoongi watched as a smile started tugging over his lips.

 “I thought you were single?” Bang asked.

 “I was. I just recently met her. We’re not dating yet.”

 “You said yet.” Yoongi kept a straight face as the other man smirked before looking over the sheet. “I am looking forward to hearing your music after you begin your relationship. The sound will probably change.”

 “Hmm… I don’t know about that, but I would call her interesting to say the least.”

 “By the name I’m guessing she’s foreign. Does she speak Korean?”

 “Almost fluently. Sometimes she gets a few words mixed up, but her Korean is really good. More standard than mine if you want to get technical.”

 “I like your Daegu accent though. It was one of the reasons you stood out to me as an applicant when you were applying. Bring her by for a tour one day. I’d love to meet the woman that’s melted your heart.”

 “No one said she’s done that.”

 “You’re a very sincere person. If the two of you are just heat partners it won’t stay that way. You’d never make a move on the girl if you weren’t going to follow it up with something serious.”

 “She’s a difficult one to read.”

 “So are you. The two of you are perfect for each other.”

 “You haven’t even met her.”

 “I’m your boss, so I’m always right.” Yoongi held himself back from scoffing at the statement. The other man was always like this when it came to certain things. “Now let’s talk about your songs.”

 OO00OO

 You felt anxious sitting in class waiting for the lecture to be over. Yoongi was sitting in the front of the room like he always did. He seemed to be grading some assignments for the professor like usual. Taehyung was doodling on his notebook and you were trying to listen, but it was sort of hard.

 You had a printed-out version of the email Yoongi had sent you and for some reason you felt incredibly nervous about having to return it to him. You were also sure you had only understood about seventy percent of the Korean on it, even with Jimin’s help. In the same folder was the paperwork that Yoongi needed to fill out to grant him temporary access to your dorm building and apartment for your heat. The two of you had agreed to get coffee after your class before heading over to your dorm together to turn in the paperwork.

 You had been so lost in your own thought that you had barely registered that class was already over. Taehyung was grinning at you. He had probably been getting the play by play of what was happening from Jimin.

 Everyone started packing up their things.

 “Bye (y/n) have fun with hyung,” Taehyung said before leaving.

 You packed up your things, but weren’t in a hurry. Normally, Yoongi stayed to chat with the professor a bit before he left. You moved to wait outside for him. About five minutes later, Yoongi came out of the room and offered you a small smile.

 “Ready to go?” he asked.

 “Yeah, are we going to the same place we met up last time?” you asked, walking over to him. He nodded to you and the two of you began walking together.

 It felt weird. Not a bad weird, but weird. You didn’t really know how you should act around him yet. You didn’t actually know Yoongi all that well. You only really knew about his preferences in bed, which was something, but not exactly what you start a conversation with.

 “How was your day?” he asked.

 “It was pretty uneventful. I just went to class. What about you?”

 “I had a graduate course in the morning and then had to student teach. Overall, it was pretty boring.”

 “Ah I see…” You paused for a minute. “You write songs for an entertainment company, right? How is that going?”

 If you weren’t mistaken you watched as he seemed to perk up with something like pride at the mention of it. He seemed more relaxed than before as well.

 “I’ve got a good start on some new demos. I work for a smaller agency that’s getting ready to debut a new idol boy group in probably the next six months. They’re all pretty young, but they’re good kids.”

 “Do you like it? I mean I’ve heard a lot of good and bad things about the Korean entertainment industry.”

 “I like it, but I’m also at a smaller company. From what I hear some of the bigger ones are pretty problematic. I know for a fact that this company is taking good care of them. If I didn’t I would have never signed with them.”

 The two of you continue in conversation about his job. You had never realized how much work truly went into producing music. So far in class you had only covered the basics of music theory and just started writing scores. The things that Yoongi did though went beyond what you thought you could ever be capable of.

 Yoongi ordered the two of your drinks and filled out the rest of the paperwork while the two of you waited. When you got your drinks you both decided to drink them while walking back to the dorm. It was a pretty nice day outside. Fall was truly just beginning and there wouldn’t be too many nice days left before the weather started to cool down.

 The two of you finished your drinks by the time you arrived at the dorms. You went to the small office where the building manager was during the day. When you arrived, she was looking down at her phone screen with a look of displeasure across her face. You had only talked to her once when you had moved in on such short notice, but she was a nice omega woman in her early thirties. She had been helpful and caring, but a little stressed out at the time.

 “Umm… I want to turn in a heat partners form,” you said, drawing her attention away from her phone.

 She looked up and smiled at you before taking the form and glancing it over.

 “Is that your alpha?” she asked.

 “Yes?” you said hesitantly. You weren’t really sure if Yoongi was your alpha or not, but on paper he was for the time being. The building manager just chuckled.

 “This is only for one time correct?” she asked.

 “For now,” Yoongi answered from behind you.

 “All right, I just want to make the two of you aware that we’ll keep this form on record for the next three months. If you want we can give him extended access to the dorms if you choose to after your heat this month. That decision is completely up to the two of you though. Min Yoongi, your ID card should be updated over night with the new security information.”

 “All right thank you,” he said.

 “Thank you,” you added.

 The two of you left the office and you realized that this is where the two of you might part. Until you got an idea.

 “I know you’ve seen the dorm before, but do you maybe want to go over some stuff before you leave.”

 Yoongi gave you a small smile and nodded his head before following you up to your dorm.

 When the two of you got there Jimin was lounging on the sofa, watching something on his laptop. He glanced up and saw the two of you together before grinning.

 “Well what do we have here?” Jimin teased.

 “Some embarrassing excuse for a college student watching… is that Korea’s Next Top Model?” Yoongi asked.

 “The fact that you recognize it says something about you too hyung.”

 “I’m just going to show Yoongi some of the stuff I have prepared for my heat. Don’t mind us.”

 “Oh I don’t.”

 You rolled your eyes and led Yoongi to your room. You were thankful that you had been trying to keep it clean because you knew he would inevitably see it at some point.

 “Okay, so I know we did the whole… to do list thing.”

 Yoongi let out a bark of laughter at that. He couldn’t help, but smile at the embarrassed yet confused look on your face.

 “I’m sorry, but calling it a ‘to do list’ was an unexpected pun coming from you.”

 “Well sorry…”

 You seemed to be pouting in a way that Yoongi found endearing. You weren’t trying to be cute, but you just ended up being that way.

 “I’m sorry please continue.”

 “Okay, well before I was so rudely interrupted.” You gave him a look and Yoongi fought back a grin at how you seemed to be seriously reprimanding him. “I bought a few things for my last heat that I found helpful. I have a fridge that I’ll have stocked at the time with some food and cookies.”

 “Cookies?”

 “I was craving them my last two heats for some reason, so I bake them and put them in the fridge to eat. It will also have drinking water. Last time it was to abrupt, so I didn’t get a chance to use them, but I bought a small water basin and some wash cloths in case I get sweaty. I also have extra sheets blankets and bed linings at the bottom of my closet.”

 “(y/n),” Yoongi said, stopping you from your rant. You turned to find him suddenly closer than you remembered him being. “I know you’re nervous. Honestly, I am a bit too. I don’t want you to be worried. I’m going to take care of you through this heat. I’m going to make sure you have everything you need and that you’re as comfortable as possible, okay?”

 “Okay…” you mumbled.

 Yoongi moved slightly closer, bringing his hands to naturally rub soothing circles into your shoulders.

 “I mean it. I don’t make commitments I don’t intend on keeping.”

 You were a commitment? He was committing to you. For some reason the thought had your stomach in somewhat pleasurable knots at his words.

 “I believe you,” you said, this time more firmly.

 “Can I kiss you right now?” he asked. You blinked in confusion shocked upon his request. You hadn’t seen it coming. “Sorry I just…”

 “No it’s okay. I mean yes, yes you can kiss me. You just sort of caught me by surpri—”

 Yoongi cut of your awkward rambling with a gentle kiss that he pressed to your lips. You had just barely closed your eyes to savor it before he was pulling away.

 “I have to get to work, but I’ll message you soon. Don’t hesitate to message me if you need anything.”

 “I won’t.”

 You should have walked Yoongi out as he said goodbye, but you had become rooted to the spot in awkward giddiness. Your stomach was flipping with warm excitement. You just barely caught Jimin yelling out at Yoongi.

 “Hyung, I know exactly what you did in there!”

 “Shut up.”

 OO00OO

 You had baked cookies yesterday and were getting ready to go to one of your classes when it happened. The clenching of your gut followed by a burning sensation engulfing your whole body. Your heat had come only about twelve hours before it was due to show up.

 You messaged Yoongi right away before crawling into your bed. You had to do something, you had to make it more comfortable for the two of you. You began to adjust the comforters and searched for more pillows to make sure the two of you could get lost in the cushiness of the bed. It wasn’t the largest bed and you somehow felt stressed at the thought of it not being big enough.

 You didn’t stress very long though. You found yourself getting wet with slick and overcome with heat. You could hardly wait for Yoongi to get here. You wanted him here so badly. You knew he could help, knew he would help.

 You tried your best, you really did, but you couldn’t take it anymore. The clenching in your core was too much to ignore. You peeled of your pants and underwear, making sure to toss them off the bed. You had just begun to massage your clit when you were hit with smell of fresh pine. With a whine you looked at your doorway to see Yoongi entering your room.

 Yoongi was dressed in tight jeans and a leather jackets. He was wearing a beanie probably to try and make his messy dark hair seem neater. You let out whine that had him instantly coming to your side.

 “It’s okay, I’m right here,” he said. “Do you still want me here?”

 “Yes,” you said. You tried to keep your voice from sounding as desperate as you felt. You couldn’t tell if you were successful.

 “Okay I need you to watch me for a bit. Look at me, okay?” You nodded your head at him. “Use your words.”

 “Okay,” you said.

 You kept your eyes on him as he revealed himself to you. First, he took off his beanie, revealing that you had been right. His hair was an utter mess. Then he removed his jacket, dropping it to the floor before lifting his t-shirt over his head. It revealed his milky torso, but you barely had anytime to dwell on it because he went straight to removing his jeans wasting no time in pulling them off equally milky legs. You thought he would stop there, but he kept going. He took off his plaid boxers to reveal his already half hard cock.

 You let out a desperate whine at the sight, suddenly remembering that you were very much in heat. You heard Yoongi mutter something in Korean before dropping to the ground and digging something out of the pocket of his leather jacket.

 “Can I come on the bed?” he asked.

 “Please do,” you said, with a huff of laughter.

 Yoongi climbed onto the bed, placing whatever was in his hands further up on the bed. He was being very formal. You heard him inhale thought he might have growled just a little bit.

 “Can you sit up? I’m going to help you out of the rest of your clothes.”

 You gave him a small yes and sat up and let him help you out of your sweater and bra. He gently helped you lay back on the bed and you realized your body was going crazy. His scent was amplified to your senses and all you wanted to do was surround yourself with it.

 “Are your sure this is what you want?”

 “Yes,” you found yourself snapping impatiently. He just gave a deep chuckle at that.

 “Okay. If you want to stop at any point in time just tell me and I will. Don’t feel like we have to keep doing something because it seems like I’m enjoying it. You need to let me know is something hurts or makes you uncomfortable, all right?”

 “All right. I mean this in the nicest way, but can you hurry up.”

 This time Yoongi let out and actual laugh his lips upturning into a brief gummy smile before leaning down to capture your lips. This kiss, much like the first one you shared, was feather light and sweet. However, the second you began to kiss him back it changed. It became much more heated. He bit your lower lip and you gasped as his tongue took the opportunity to invade your mouth in the most delightful way. He was very much in control of the kiss, but somehow it wasn’t rough. You found yourself succumbing to the way it felt, arms moving to tug his body closer to you.

 Yoongi growled and broke away to place soft kisses on your cheek trailing them to underneath your jaw and sucking lightly at the skin.

 “Can I scent mark you?”

 “Please do,” you replied.

 The moment you felt Yoongi rub his scent gland against yours an overwhelming sense of calm washed over you. The scent of pine seemed to comfort you as much as the scent of peppermint was making him feel refreshed.

 Yoongi was trying so hard not to rush. He didn’t want to rush your first time for you even if it was your heat. You were making it so hard for him when all he wanted to do was completely wreck you. The need to claim had never been his strongest alpha instinct, but suddenly it felt like it was the only one he could remember.

 “Yoongi…”

 Your voice stirred him from his thoughts and he looked down at you to see you rubbing your thighs together. Your dilated eyes connected with his and he smelt a fresh wave of peppermint go through the room. You were probably more than ready for him, but he wanted to take it slow.

 He went back to work trailing kisses over your scent gland, but not marking you. That would come later. The kisses moved to your chest and when one of his hands came to cup a breast you rewarded him with a breathy sigh. He caught your eyes as he moved his mouth over to suck your nipple into his mouth and you let out the sweetest moan for him. He moved to the other and was given the same reward. He loved you like this.

 Yoongi moved to put kisses between your breasts before once again moving up to capture your lips in a sweet kiss. He then repositioned himself, finally parting your legs, so that he could move his body in between them. His hand teasingly trailed up your thigh feeling the wetness that had managed to seep out and you were absolutely soaking for him.

 “Tell me, what’s been down here baby?” he asked. His dark eyes searching yours for discomfort at his words. He saw confusion before he saw a spark of excitement run through them.

 “Just fingers,” you replied. Yoongi trailed his hand over to your core just teasingly coming into contact with it.

 “Who’s fingers baby?” Yoongi finally pressed his fingers to your clit, giving you some sort of relief.

 “Mine,” you answered. You let out a moan of protest when he stopped. He was giving you a stern look. “And Jimin’s…”

 Yoongi’s fingers pressed to your clit once again, but this time rubbing tiny circles that had you whimpering for more. The way his finger felt cold on your hot skin was so good. You didn’t want him to stop.

 “Do you want something better than Jimin’s fingers?”

 “Yes,” you replied. You let out a whine of protest when Yoongi removed his fingers from your clit. “What?”

 “I’m going to give you something better baby. I’m going to give you my tongue.”

 You felt your cheeks flush at the bold statement, but Yoongi didn’t give you much time to be embarrassed before pressing a soft kiss to your clit. He started slow and the sensation felt odd. It was weird when he licked a stripe up your slit before flicking at your clit with his tongue. You weren’t really sure what to think, but before you knew it the sensations were overwhelming.

 He pulled your clit into his mouth, flicking at it quickly with his tongue making your body jolt in surprise at the sensation. The tightness in your core quickly building as he passionately devoured your core. Your hands gripped onto the blankets surrounding you as your hips involuntarily bucked up at a particularly strong suck.

 “You can grab onto me.”

 No sooner than when he said the words you found your hands raking through his dark locks, not sure whether to push him away from the overwhelming sensation or to pull him closer.

 You were completely blindsided by your sudden orgasm. You let out a loud moan as you came, hands tugging on Yoongi’s hair as he continued to lap up the new slick dripping out of your core.

 You felt the heat still thrumming through your body as Yoongi sat up. You watched as he wiped the excess slick from his chin biting back a groan as he looked you over. He leaned down to place a gentle kiss on your neck.

 You wanted him so badly. Your core was greedily clenching around air as the aftershocks of your orgasm left you. You wanted nothing more than to get Yoongi inside, wanting to feel the way he’d fill you up. The way he’d drill into you and make you cum.

 “That was so good baby.” He brushed a hand comfortingly through your hair before placing more kisses by your jaw.

 “Yoongi… Inside,” you whined. “Please I can’t take it.”

 “Baby…” he said, moving back so he could look at you. “I’m not going to rush. We’re going to go nice and slow. I’m going to open you up really good okay?”

 “Yoongi please!”

 He shushed you. Yoongi trailed a hand back to your core and slowly inserted a finger into you. It went in no problem. It didn’t surprise him with how wet you were. He wanted to make sure though that you came enough to get out of this wave of your heat though. He added another finger beginning to stretch you open, even with your heat you were tight.

 “How’s that feel?”

 “Good. It feels good…”

 Yoongi groaned at you. You were an absolute vision right now. You took his finger so well and your eyes looked at him just pleading for him to make you cum. He didn’t want to disappoint you either.

 “Can you cum on my fingers and I’ll give you my cock? Can you do that for me baby girl? Does it sound good?”

 “I can do it,” you replied.

 Yoongi felt you clench and unclench around him trying to get more stimulation. With a chuckle he added a third finger before beginning to move them in and out of you. When you gave a particularly loud moan he began to target that spot over and over again. Until you shut your eyes and threw back your head, letting out a whine. He felt the way your body tried to suck his fingers in as it released fresh slick.

 “That’s my good girl.” Yoongi felt your body shiver at that. He would keep that in mind for later. “You ready for me baby?”

 You nodded your head at him. Desperate eyes pleading with him and he frowned.

 “I need your words baby. I need to hear you want me.”

 “I want you Yoongi, alpha please.”

 That word sparked something primal in him that he had been trying to hold back. His hands moved to grab a condom on the bed ripping it open and quickly rolling it onto his painfully pulsing cock.

 He kissed you again. It was much rougher and more urgent than before and you instantly responded, hands coming up to tangle in his hair as you opened your mouth for him. He groaned in satisfaction before he lined himself up with your core.

 “Are you ready?”

 “Yes.”

 Yoongi firmly buried himself in you, making sure to not go to fast. He let out a groan in surprise as he noticed you with your head thrown back eyes closed and blissfully moaning out. Your core trying to suck him in.

 “Did you just cum baby?”

 Yoongi watched as a flush covered your cheeks in embarrassment, giving him your answer. The shy girl he was used to seeing reappearing beneath him and further igniting his want.

 “I couldn’t help it…” He moved to give you a soft kiss.

 “It’s okay cum as many times as you want.”

 You nodded your head at him and prepared yourself for him to start moving. Yoongi started gently at first. He just grinded the two of your bodies together, getting you used to him being inside you. However, you let out a pleased moan when he finally pulled back before thrusting in. Yoongi set a steady pace. His hands pressing themselves on either side of your head caging you in and surrounding you with his warmth and scent. It felt good.

 “More…”

 “More what, baby?”

 You opened your eyes to see a teasing look on his face as he watched you.

 “I don’t know just whatever you’re doing.”

 He hummed before his hips snapped with more force than before into you, causing you to let out a whine of approval as he continued his new pace. Each thrust seeming to make that knot in your stomach tighter and tighter. You knew you were going to cum again. You tried to tell him, but found that this time your Korean failed you. Your words coming out in a jumbled mess that seemed to please him. Your head tipped back as you went over the edge, bearing your neck to him.

 “Can I still mark you?”

 “Yes.”

 You brought your hands up to guide Yoongi to your neck as began to suck at the gland on your neck sending a new wave of pleasure through your body as he left the mark on your skin. You could feel the knot in your stomach winding tighter again quickly as he kept thrusting into you.

 “Alpha, I’m going to… <em>again!</em>”

 “It’s okay omega.” The name sent a tremor through your body and you felt yourself building up too quickly again. “I’m going to cum too. Do you still want my knot?”

 “I want my alpha’s knot!”

 Yoongi’s hips suddenly picked up speed to slam into you with force you hadn’t known he had and you felt yourself building up again. You were just on the edge of your release when you felt the sensation of Yoongi growing in you. You didn’t dwell on it as you felt yourself cum once again, your core trying to suck Yoongi in.

 You fought to keep your eyes open as you felt Yoongi’s pace turn into grinding as his knot grew too large to pull out of you. He buried his face into your neck as he let out a loud groan as he came his body covering yours protectively as he shook from his orgasm.

 The two of you held onto each other as your bodies began to calm. The heat no longer incessantly eating away at your body as the wave died down. The only sound in the room was the two of you panting.

 “Do you want to mark me?” Yoongi asked.

 He pulled his face away just enough to look into your eyes, hand coming naturally to stroke at your cheek. You were surprised. Most alphas didn’t like to be marked by their partners, it showed some sort of submission. The thought of marking up his milky skin was very tempting though.

 “Can I?”

 “Of course you can (y/n),” he responded.

 Yoongi bared the right side of his neck to you and you carefully moved to it. You placed kisses along it until you came to his scent gland where you sucked delicately at the soft skin, making Yoongi produce a sound that sounded almost like a purr of satisfaction. You pulled away to see him smiling softly at you.

 “You look tired,” he stated. “You should get some rest before your next wave.”

 He carefully pulled you up, trying to make sure that his knot didn’t make it too uncomfortable for you to move. He positioned the two of you in a more comfortable position to lay down in.

 “But your knot?” you asked. “Are you comfortable?”

 “I’m fine, it will go down in about ten or fifteen minutes. You need to get some rest before then okay.”

 “Okay.”

 Yoongi placed a gentle kiss on your lips as he pulled you closer to him. In no time you were able to fall asleep to the relaxing scent of pine surrounding you. Yoongi found himself drifting off shortly after as he listened to the rhythmic beat of your heart.

[morfinwen]

Could you do the BrOTP ask for Lauren & Ian? And then I'm not sure what other sets of your characters qualifies as BrOTPs, but how about #3, 6, 13, 15, and 18 for any you want to answer for? Thank you! :)

Ian and Lauren

1. What in-jokes do they have with each other?

- Referring to ‘Frere Jacques’ as “the French National anthem”

- Calling all birds “penguins”

- Pointing to a bell or candle and yelling “CHRISTMAS!” (Ian’s the only one who does this one in public)

2. Are they the “I’ll pay this time if you pay next time”-type friends, or the “I’ll pay for my food and you’ll pay for yours”-type friends?

Usually they pay for their own food. Sometimes Ian forgets his wallet and Lauren covers for him, and there are days when Lauren is super out of sorts and Ian takes her out and insists on paying. It seems to even out.

3. Who’s more prone to pranking, or otherwise messing with, the other?

Lauren doesn’t prank or mess with Ian because that’s not the kind of person she is. Ian doesn’t prank or mess with Lauren because that’s just asking for trouble.

4. How do they text/message each other? Proper punctuation and capital letters, egregious overuse of emojis, mostly in meme format…?

Ian mostly uses correct spelling, but can’t be bothered with capitalization or most forms of punctuation (he’ll use the occasional ? or ! for clarity or emphasis, apostrophes are a toss-up). Sometimes he’ll use a single emoji as a response.

For Lauren, it’s all about speed. She abbreviates liberally, uses more acronyms than most people know exist, only uses punctuation for emphasis (!!! or ???), and hates emojis. She tolerates them from Ian because he uses them as an efficient replacement for a multiple word response, but even then it sometimes ticks her off to see one on her phone.

5. Do they exchange jokey birthday presents, or deeply thought-out and meaningful presents? Or both?

Lauren’s parents could never afford to get their children more than one or two gifts a year, and it was common for the presents to be homemade or secondhand. Ian’s parents preferred to do something for him on his birthday, like go see a movie or visit the museum, and give him one or two big presents plus a few smaller ones at Christmas. Both of them learned to manage their expectations regarding presents. Getting or giving a gift that indicates a great deal of thought and consideration from the giver would require either a change in perspective, or result in potential miscommunication.

They occasionally get each other gifts, closer to thoughtful than jokey, but putting a lot of thought into it might make things awkward. Mostly it’s gift certificates or music CDs they think the other might like.

6. They go on a road trip together. Who drives, who picks the music, who’s in charge of snacks?

Ian puts together a CD.

They both buy the kind of snacks they want.

Ian starts driving.

Lauren hears one too many songs she’s not in the mood for on his CD, and switches to the radio.

This trip, Ian promises himself, he will ration his Twinkies. One hour in, he’s eaten the whole box. It’s fine, they need to stop for directions anyway.

Lauren buys a new soda. She doesn’t want the one she has.

Ian starts driving again, but Lauren insists he’s misreading the directions they got, so she drives. 

Lauren gets sick of the radio, so Ian puts his CD back on.

Ian runs out of Twinkies again. Lauren lets him have one of her snacks - one that she can’t believe she brought, she doesn’t even like that kind.

They’re lost. Lauren only admits it 45-60 minutes after she first starts wondering if she missed the right turn.

Ian tries using the GPS to figure out which way to go, but either he’s using it wrong or it’s confused about where they are.

They stop for directions. Ian has to ask, because Lauren is too angry to be civil.

It’s time for lunch, so they stop.

Lauren is still too worked up over having gotten lost to drive, so Ian starts driving. He puts on his CD for only a few minutes before Lauren switches to the radio.

Twenty minutes later, he realizes he got on the wrong highway, and they’re backtracking. He tries to get off to turn around, but instead winds up on another highway headed in a totally different direction.

They get off, and Lauren insists on driving. She gets turned around, and now they’re heading in the opposite of that totally different direction. 

They pull over and argue over the map/GPS for several minutes. It’s about a half hour before Lauren calms down enough to get back in the car.

Ian drives with the radio off. Lauren sulks in the passenger seat. They finally get on the correct highway.

Forty minutes later, Ian misses his turn-off, but because they’re on a rural highway in the middle of nowhere, he doesn’t realize it. 

Two hours later, they both start wondering, weren’t they supposed to reach a city by now? After arguing with the GPS again, they decide to ask for directions once they stop for dinner.

There’s nowhere to stop. Lauren thinks they should turn around, Ian insists it’s better to keep going.

Thirty to forty minutes later, still nowhere. Ian starts to think they should turn around, Lauren argues that they already know there’s nothing back there, there’s got to be something closer ahead. Ian can’t really argue with this.

The first place they see to eat is Lauren’s least favorite dining chain, so they keep going.

They have to stop for gas, and while Lauren doesn’t like any of the places she sees, she’s too hungry and tired to argue. Ian is less hungry, having eaten all of the snacks, but still ready for dinner.

It’s dark now. When they get directions, Lauren is furious when she finds out this happened because Ian missed the turn-off hours ago. Ian lets her rant – he was driving, after all.

They stop for the night in a hotel that is at least half a state away from where they were supposed to stop for the night. 

The next day, they turn around and go home, because this whole road trip idea was a terrible one to begin with, and things are only going to get worse.

On the way back, they get turned around three times.

7. What do they think of each other’s family?

Ian gets along with some of Lauren’s siblings, and is civil to but avoids interaction with the others. He finds her parents intimidating, her mother moreso than her father, and is instinctively on his best behavior around them. Overall he likes them, or at least doesn’t dislike them, but frankly he finds spending time around them kind of exhausting. 

Lauren sometimes wishes her parents were more like Ian’s parents.

8. Do they have any nicknames for each other?

Nope.

9. Who’d be the first to try and patch things up if they had a fight?

Ian. It’s always Ian, even when it wasn’t really a fight, just Lauren blowing up over something. 

10. One of their phones goes off in the middle of the night. Who’s calling whom, and why?

The only time either of them would call the other in the middle of the night is in an emergency. Lauren is very good at having a regular, sensible bedtime that gives her a solid eight hours of sleep. Ian is less good at it, but doesn’t generally feel like making calls at midnight, and definitely knows better than to bother Lauren if he did. 

11. What’s their favorite funny story about something that happened to the two of them?

Probably something Ian did in grade school to poke fun at someone who was harassing Lauren. 

12. Would they do a joint cosplay? If so, who would they dress up as?

By coincidence, Ian went as Link for Halloween one year and Lauren went as Princess Zelda. They deliberately did it again in college.

13. Do they have any TV shows that they watch together? Are there any shows they have wildly different opinions on?

Lauren actually likes reality tv – ironically it’s easier to treat the drama less seriously because it’s pretending to be reality. She likes the occasional sitcom, as long as the characters are equally jerks and/or stupid. Ian can’t stand either of those. He likes dramas and speculative fiction (he grew up watching all the Star Trek shows with his dad).

I’ve never seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer myself, but it seems like the kind of show they would be able to watch together: fantasy drama for Ian, funny/tongue-in-cheek enough for Lauren, though they definitely had different opinions on the characters and plotlines.

14. Which one is the “fight me” friend and which one is the one who tries to keep the peace and prevent their friend from punching a total stranger?

This question pretty much answers itself. 

15. One of them comes up with an ill-advised but mostly harmless idea. Does the other one egg them on because they think it’ll be funny, or try and talk them out of it?

Ian comes up with the occasional crazy-but-harmless idea. Lauren won’t egg him on, but if her half-hearted attempt to talk him out of it fails, she might stick around to see the outcome – as long as she’s far enough away no one mistakes her for being involved. 

16. Who would win if they arm-wrestled?

Growing up in the family she did, Lauren learned a lot of dirty tricks for arm-wrestling. Ian absolutely refuses to compete with her anymore, even if she insists she won’t use any of them.

17. Who’s better at what type of video games, and how competitive are they when they play together?

Ian is good with platformers and rhythm games. Lauren doesn’t really play video games. The only one they play together is Mario Kart, and Lauren is so nightmarishly competitive Ian just stays out of her way.

18. One of them ends up in hospital for something serious but not life-threatening. What does the other bring along when they visit in order to cheer them up?

Ian would bring Lauren a soft ball or something else she could throw or otherwise express her frustration physically upon, a CD of calm, meditative music, a kaleidoscope or glitter wand, and/or a coloring book of shapes or nature. 

Lauren would bring Ian a DVD set of a sci-fi show, most likely cheesy or low-quality because most sci-fi shows are and she doesn’t have the least idea how to judge them, a complete comic series, and/or a historical documentary. 

19. How huggy are they?

Ian isn’t a touchy kind of guy, and Lauren does not like being touched without permission, so not very.

20. What was the moment when they first realized that they’d become friends?

Ian pretty much decided they were friends from the first day he started harass – i mean following Lauren around in kindergarten. For Lauren, it was probably when Ian invited her to his birthday party and was clearly happy when she came – up until that point, she’d kind of assumed his parents made him invite her.

------

The situations in which the Quartet – Chris, Angie, Neal, and Reagan – interact are not numerous, but i’m going to answer this for them as a group anyway.

3. Who’s more prone to pranking, or otherwise messing with, the other?

Chris. He’s never intentionally mean or over-the-top, and never does anything that could hurt or get someone in trouble. 

On rare occasions, Reagan might pull something small, especially if she can keep her involvement secret.

6. They go on a road trip together. Who drives, who picks the music, who’s in charge of snacks?

Chris drives. He also has the map, the bathroom and meal breaks planned (both location and time), and the address of any hotels they’ll be staying at, as well as their room numbers. He has control issues, which he is open and honest about, but he’s still driving. If for some reason they’ve been driving long enough that it’s not safe anymore for him to drive, he will reluctantly hand it over; most likely to Reagan, since she’s got the next-highest tolerance for it.

Neal and Reagan put together CDs with different music. Neal because he’s good at balancing their tastes and is the most invested in what they’ll be listening to, Reagan because she’s usually got new music to introduce, and because she’s stronger-willed than Neal when it comes to telling Chris no, they are not including the entire soundtrack to every hit Broadway musical. No, not even most of them.

Everyone is responsible for bringing their own snacks, but Angie will always have extras in her bag – weirdly enough, usually ones that others meant to bring but forgot. She also has a good balance of healthy and sweet, in case one of the others (or rather, all of the others) were not as good at balancing and just brought candy -- or in Chris’ case, possibly just jalapeño-flavored chips.

13. Do they have any TV shows that they watch together? Are there any shows they have wildly different opinions on?

In the right moods, they can all watch the same show of any type  – discuss it seriously if it’s good, mock it if it’s bad. Otherwise, their tastes are way too disparate.

15. One of them comes up with an ill-advised but mostly harmless idea. Does the other one egg them on because they think it’ll be funny, or try and talk them out of it?

Chris sometimes comes up with ideas like that. He doesn’t need anyone to egg him on, but Reagan is the most likely to encourage him.

18. One of them ends up in hospital for something serious but not life-threatening. What does the other bring along when they visit in order to cheer them up?

Chris: Any length of time in bed would be so distracting as to nearly make him go mad, so even though he tries to hold himself back, he usually ends up overdoing it – an entire TV series on DVD (7+ seasons), plus some kind of handheld game, plus some kind of project (arts and crafts, mechanical, anything at all) that can be done while in bed, plus an ambient noise generator.

Reagan: Music, or an audiobook for Angie. For Chris, covers of classic or Broadway songs by new or obscure artists, with a few pop songs mixed in to keep him on his toes – if possible, she’ll find covers of those pop songs in a very different style, see how long it takes him to figure out he’s listening to a Latin choral version of “Call Me Maybe”. For Neal, long choral or classical pieces, and/or new age-style music. 

Neal: …. A balloon and a card, with a stuffed animal if it’s Angie or Reagan. He’s not very good at this.

Angie: Books. For Chris, either an action story or an exciting non-fiction book that reads like fiction, plus some Sudoku books or some other kind of puzzle book – the harder the better. For Reagan, either a fully-dramatized audiobook or something with more pictures than text – maybe a graphic novel, more likely something with pretty nature vistas or interesting architecture. For Neal, a book of poetry, plus a journal for getting his thoughts down.

Thanks for asking!

[goddamnwritersblock]

That one 50 questions post I answered them all for Drago

1 . What does their bedroom look like?

• Gothic and dark maybe? But still comfy? Something like this

2 . Do they have any daily rituals?

• Yep. First he does a morning skin care routine then reads whatever unopened mail there is on his desk, goes to the gardens to care for the plants and animals and then he’ll go to breakfast with his family. But that’s more of his routine....

3 . Do they exercise?

• He does fencing and will sometimes run/fly with the larger animals. Twice a week maybe?

4 . What would they do if they needed to make dinner but the kitchen was too busy?

• He never cooks much to his dismay. Always too busy to learn.

5 . Cleanliness?

• He tries to be as clean as possible but his room is usually messy. But in an organized way

6 . Eating habits? Sample of daily menu?

• If people weren’t there to remind him he’d go days without food. Now menu.... hmm....

Breakfast: probably things like fruit crepes with a form of meat and quail eggs and a side of pomegranates or grapefruit.

Lunch: Fish with vegetables and rice. Probably has a sort of sauce on top. Bowl of fruit as a side.

Dinner: Venison or steak, vegetables such as roasted asparagus, grilled leeks, and rosemary baby potatoes and a small serving of fruits. Fruit is very important to their culture.

7 . Favorite way to waste time and feelings on wasting time?

• Going into town to mingle. He loves it but doesn’t have much time to waste.

8 . Favorite indulgence and thoughts on indulging?

• What is indulgence?

9 . Makeup?

• Yes. Only light makeup like soft contouring and color correction. Maybe some natural looking eyeliner here and there

10 . Neurosis?

• A mild form of anxiety and depression but he’s gone undiagnosed

11 . Intellectual pursuits?

• His path in life is already set in stone but if he could do anything he’d go to a university and study plants and animals

12 . Favorite book genre?

• High and dark fantasy

13 . Sexual orientation? Thoughts?

• Straight. He’s very open minded on the subject unlike his family

14 . Physical abnormalities? Including allergies and long term illnesses.

• Like every dragon he has horns in his human form. He’s allergic to dandelions.

15 . Biggest and smallest short-term goal?

• Biggest: Travel the world

• Smallest: Build his personal library

16 . Biggest and smallest long term goal?

• Live a healthy and active life

• Find a loving wife

17 . ????

• ????

18 . Favorite drink?

• Lemon cotton tea

19 . What do they think about before going to sleep?

• Things that need to be done around the estate, ways to better the kingdom, and wondering if he’s going to end up like his father

20 . Childhood illnesses? Stories?

• He was a pretty healthy child. Only small colds.

21 . Turn-ons? Turn-offs?

• Consent. He has no turn-offs.

22 . Given a blank piece of paper, a pen or pencil, and free time what will most likely happen?

• He’d probably write a short story or a poem

23 . Organized?

• He has people organize for him

24 . What study do they excel at?

• History of his kingdom

25 . How do they see themselves in 5 years?

• A strong leader ((possibly with a queen by his side))

26 . Do they have any plans for the future?

• He does it as he goes

27 . Biggest regret?

• Letting his family treat him the way they did after his mother died

28 . Best friend? Worst enemy?

• His mother and Aria. The rest of his family

29 . Reaction to sudden disaster?

• Freeze up. Let it process. Plan. Jump into action.

30 . Reaction to sudden personal disaster?

• Let it process. Cry. Seek help. Plan. Action.

31 . Most prized possession?

• Book of fairytales his mother gave him before she died.

32 . Thoughts on material possessions?

• He loves them

33 . Concept of home and family?

• His brothers hate him. He’s the youngest of 14 but got the crown and the entire fortune. Both parents are dead.

34 . Thoughts on privacy?

• He’s a very private person until you gain his trust then he opens up a little but not entirely.

35 . What do they enjoy doing but consider a waste of time?

• Building models

36 . What makes them feel guilty?

• Yelling at someone or telling a blatant lie

37 . Analytical or emotional thinker?

• Mostly emotional but still analytical

38 . A or B type personality?

• ??? Idk what that means?????

39 . What recharges them after being drained?

• Reading in front of the fire and some form of soup. If he’s with Aria then listening to her ramble and cuddling. He also likes spending time in his gardens.

40 . Do they have a superiority complex? Inferiority complex? Neither?

• Inferiority complex mostly

41 . How misanthropic are they?

• He seems so on the outside but he’s not. He likes getting to know people once he calms his anxiety.

42 . Hobbies?

• Reading, fencing, various instruments, painting, writing, gardening, flying (???), and traveling

43 . How far did they get in education?

• He got the highest education anyone could receive. He’s trying to better public education as much as he can.

44 . Religion?

• figuring that out still

45 . Superstitions? View of the occult?

• He has no issues with them until they put someone in harms way. He knows a little magic himself.

46 . How do they express their thoughts? Words or deeds?

• Deeds

47 . Their ideal lover?

• A girl who can teach him new things and let him teach her. Someone who will listen and to listen to. Someone who will let him give them the entire world.

48 . How do they express love?

• By spoiling them rotten with gifts

49 . Fist fight. Win or lose?

• 2,000% lose

50 . Are they afraid of dying?

• Yes. He doesn’t want to lose everything he’s worked so hard for. Doesn’t want to leave the ones who love him heartbroken. But for now he has thousands of years ahead of him if all goes well.

[softmoxymuffin]

“Learning Experience”

forgot to upload this on tumblr but had uploaded it on ao3 i dont know either not a lot of people read my fics on tumblr or the whole censorship thing is affecting my smut more than it really should have but either way here’s chapter 6

Chapter 1: Check Please

Chapter 2: Airplanes and Automobiles

Chapter 3: Tellin’ the Folks

Chapter 4: Hot Cocoa and Surprise Hugs

Chapter 5: Breakfast Sandwiches

Chapter 6: Learning Experience

Chapter 7: Keeping up Defenses

Chapter 8: Confessions in the Bitter Cold

Breakfast was a success. Though Dean wouldn’t call what he did cooking, the Rollins family and especially Seth were absolutely thankful for it. He had prepared some eggs 3 ways; sunny side up, scrambled, and poached. He fried up some bacon and a couple of breakfast sausages. Dean had separated the bread; some he had left plain, some toasted, and a couple he had drenched and turned to French toast. While Dean had done that, Seth had prepared everything else that didn’t require heating up. He had a fresh batch of coffee going. He filled a pitcher full of orange juice. He got the fruit that Dean had been able to buy and cut them up.

Once they were done they had made a decent spread on the kitchen island. It wasn’t until everyone had loaded their individual plates when Brandon, Seth’s older brother, mentioned this reminded him of the taco station their dad would prepare for them as kids. Everything just laid out for everyone else to come and assemble what they wanted. Apart from breakfast his mom and dad would make for them, Seth could easily admit this was one of the best breakfast’s he’d ever.

“This was wonderful Dean,” Holly had spoken while eating her slices of French toast with honey and berries. “Thank you.”

“Neh, don’t mention it.” The blond had replied before taking a sip of his coffee, Seth suspecting the mug was their to hide the blush forming on his cheeks.

“No, really Dean.” Hector who had stood up to grab another cup of coffee, had stopped to put his hand on Dean’s shoulder. “My family and I really appreciate it. It’s been a while since we’ve had everyone under one roof again. And as fun as taking care of these little monsters can be, it was really thoughtful of you to offer us your help. So, thank you.”

Seth’s stepdad Hector was a kind man. It was easily seen in his demeanor. Ever since Seth’s own father walked out on them, Hector had been the man of the house and had taken him and Brandon in his arms like they were his own kids. Though, the whole ordeal had caused Seth to go through a couple of difficult teen years it wasn’t until after all that when he realized how blessed he was to have his stepdad and his mom stuck by him through it all.

Being surrounded by his family, reminded of everything he’d gone through. Now to have Dean, a member of chosen family, be a part of it all and see not only his stepdad but his whole family welcome him so easily, Seth felt his heart full and happy. Whatever the circumstances were, no matter how bad it could be, Seth was glad Dean had chosen to come to him. Seth was glad his family seems to have chosen Dean as much as Seth already had.

After breakfast, Holly and Dd had insisted to do the cleaning after everything Dean and Seth had already done. Hector had plans to clean up the garage and shovel the driveway. Seth and Dean had volunteered to help, but Hector had insisted that he and Brandon were more than capable of finishing the job, much to Brandon’s dismay. Hector had reminded Seth of how much he had wanted to check up on his wrestling school and should take the chance to do so now.

“They’d really appreciate seeing you again.” Hector had said. “They haven’t seen you since November. Think it’s time for a visit.”

“They’re still there? I mean, hadn’t they gone off for the holiday?” Dean had asked.

“Well, most of them have.” Holly had answered with a sad sigh as she put dishes away. “But some of our kids have difficult home lives. Let’s just say they’d much rather stay than go home.”

Before Seth could ask about that, Dean had made a sad sigh of his own and agreed. “I totally get that.”

Now, Seth rudely reminded how he was still clueless about what was going on with Dean. He was tempted to ask, but knew the timing was not right. Instead, he had turned to his friend and asked.

“You wanna come check the place out?” he asked with an excited smile.

“Me?” Dean sounding more confused than he really should have.

“Yeah you,” he repeated. “The kids’ll love it. I mean it’s a wrestling school. It’s basically like you’re coming in as a guest lecturer.” He lightheartedly joked.

The thought made Dean smile but still felt the need to ask “You sure about that? I had never been any good at school.”

“I’m positive.” Seth insisted. “Those kids will shit themselves when they find out you’re there. Plus, they’d actually learn something valuable.” Seth smiled. Then both wrestlers went to their respective rooms to get ready.

It had been a couple of weeks since Seth had gone to “Black and Brave”. He did his best to keep up to date with the place and made sure he had a good grasp on everything going on. But with all the travelling and shows, it can be pretty difficult to run a school so far away from it all. He was grateful he had the chance to do so now. Then to bring Dean along would be such a great opportunity for the kids. Apart from that, he thought maybe the experience would also be a good for Dean. Would be a good distraction from whatever he was going through. It would put him in his element and have other see that too is just a bonus.

By the time Seth was ready, he had gone downstairs. His mom had insisted he take some of the leftovers from breakfast for their lunch with the kids at the school. Seth took the sandwiches and had gone down to warm up his car only to find his friend already there and seemed to have been checking the trunk.

“What you doing?” he asked.

“Nothing.” Dean said innocently the way kid does when he’d done something behind your back.

“Ok,” Seth knew better, but he was willing to see this through.

“What’s that?” Dean asked motioning at the Tupperware he was holding.

“Lunch stuff.” Seth had imitated Dean’s earlier answer but added “Mom wanted us to bring some leftover sandwiches for the kids at the school.”

“Sweet,” Dean had said before he climbed in the passenger seat and took the sandwiches from the other man to place them on his lap.

The drive to the school was made both feel familiar. Seth behind the wheels with Dean shotgun. Dean had asked a couple of questions about the place before getting there, just wanting to orient himself about the school; How many kids they got? Less then 20 maybe even less now during the holidays. How old are they? They ranged from 16 to 23. How far along are they? Some are there for the fun of it, less than a handful seem to be really in for it in the long haul, while most are more or less curious about the whole thing wanting to learn more. Seth couldn’t really think of anything deeply important to tell the other man, and just reassured him that he’ll be great. He honestly thinks the kids will just be thrilled to have another wrestler there to teach them something new.

He had parked right outside the building. The place was a converted warehouse. It had reminded Dean of the FCW headquarters before he and Seth had joined the main roster. Seth hadn’t noticed the resemblance until now, maybe it was comforting to have someplace for other’s start similar to where he started. Both men had gotten out of the car, Dean had handed Seth the Tupperware. Seth was making his way towards the building. Once he had gotten to the door to open it for his friend he had realized rather than follow him Dean had gone behind the car to open the trunk.

“What’s going on?” Seth asked again, fearing the worst.

“Nothing, just head inside and do a little introduction or something.” He had answered without really answering. Seth had looked at him suspiciously but was only shooed away by the other man who was still trying to get the trunk opened.

Whatever Dean was up to, Seth hope to god almighty it wasn’t anything too bad.

He walked into the school and was met with warm welcome. He could see that less than half of the kids were here, but again knowing it was the holidays he was not surprised. He had asked around updates on how everyone was going. Mostly have been keeping up to date on their workouts and practices. They were good kids. Seth wouldn’t have given them a chance if he suspected any different. He had asked how the living quarters were and made sure everything was doing well. Other than a few of them complaining that others were not pulling their weight on the chores, no real problem seemed to have arose in his absence.

He had gotten them to settle down and grab a chair each. He had them sit in semi-circle next to the ring where he had stood to speak to them.

“Ok, first of all; I’m glad to see each and every one of you. I can see a lot of familiar faces, and for whatever reason you may have I’m glad you guys have chosen to stick around. It’s been a while since I’ve been here, but I’m back and I’m glad to say that brought a guest you guys are going to be excited to meet.”

And as if rehearsed cue, the door to the school had been kicked open. There stood a silhouette of a man tall and broad shouldered carrying a heavy load in his arms. He strutted his way in making absolutely no eye contact. When he was a good five feet away from the ring he had bent forward and threw what he had held in his hand hard enough that it rolled to a stop between Seth and the kids, all of whom paled at the sight of the thing.

“Hi kids,” Dean greeted as he now stood in front of him. His smile a mile long and his eyes sparkling with mischief. “My name is Dean Ambrose, and I’m here to teach you the many ways to wrestle using barbed wires.” Then casually pointed to the giant coil of thorny metal in front of them.

Everybody held their breath. The students in question might have just had, as Seth predicted earlier, shat themselves. Seth couldn’t blame them.

“Dean no!” Seth exclaimed with horrified worry.

“What?” Dean asked incredulously. “It’s just the basics.”

Seth looked at the students wanting to give them a reassuring look, but was just as worried as they were. He thought one of them was going to pass out. The another started breathing heavily, as Seth felt the need to ask himself if any one of them had asthma or something.

After a very tense silence in the gym, it had finally broke with a chuckle. A little laugh that slowly transformed into a deep and uncontrolled cackle. Dean was laughing so hard he had to grab a hold of the ring to keep himself from falling.

In that moment, Seth wasn’t sure if he wanted to punch him or kick him. He should have known Dean was just joking. He really shouldn’t have been as surprised as he was.

“Hahahaha Ambrose very funny!” Seth had said sarcastically.

“You should have seen your faces.” Dean had tried to reply between laughs, as he wiped the tears in his eyes. “You turned paler than Sheamus’ ass.”

Once it was abundantly clear that Dean was in fact joking, you could see the collective sigh of relief that fell over the rest of the students. A couple even found the humor in it enough to laugh at their sorry state, but all were just relieved barbed wire was not going anywhere near them in any sort of way.

To seemingly prove this, Dean had bent down and grabbed the coil to heft it back into his arms exactly like he had done when he came in and began to carry it out of the way to against a far side wall.

“Anyway, sorry about the lil scare I gave you. Was just joking, but Seth did invite me of help.” With a giant clap and a big smile he asked the group of 8-9 teens “So, who’s ready to wrestle.?”

For the next couple of hours Dean and Seth had ran the student through basic warm up and passes. Made sure each and every one of them were ready to give show them their best. Seth had called them to pair up and plan a little showcase of what they had been working on since he last saw them. He thought the best way for Dean to be able to help the kids was to first get to see them work and build from there. It was such a welcome not only to have a fresh pair of eyes on his students, but one’s he has such respect for.

Dean had always been an incredible wrestler and performer. It was rare to really have both, and crucial for success in the industry they were in. If you were just a fighter then you should go ahead and move to boxing of MMA. If you were just a performer than go for being an actor or Rockstar. But Dean was both, what was great about him was that Seth believed that wrestling really was what Dean loved. This wasn’t some stupid stepping stone towards something grander like a career being a movie star or pop icon. Dean was really into it for being into it, being a genuine fan and wanting to be apart of something he had always admired growing up. It was something he had always admired about Dean. It was one of the things they had shared.

After the rounds between the students, and a few helpful tips given to each of them. The two were then egged on to put a show of their own. Though it was only for 9 teens in a warehouse, Dean and Seth were more than enthusiastic about showing them how they were. He was sure many of his students have seen them fight before; all on tv and many during house shows in Davenport. But to fight in a gym like this, to fight just for the sake of fighting he had felt like showing them something they hadn’t seen before.

“What you say baby?” he teased the blond.

“I say bring it pretty boy.” Dean replied with a giant smile on his face.

They both charged at the same time. Arms in and out of grappling. Heads tucked and body rolls avoiding each other’s hits. The occasional bounce off the ropes for distance. This was a fight for fun. No pressure for an audience or upper management. Not having to have a script in mind. It was just pure and that’s how Dean and Seth wrestled best.

Though he had met him years prior through mutual friends and being in the same companies, but at different times, their first real match really didn’t happen until they both reached FCW down in Tampa around 2011. He can still remember that day when Joey Mercury unknowingly re-introduced him to Dean Ambrose.

*flashback*

“So what you got planned now you’re here?” Seth asked after their short small talk.

“Oh that’s easy,” he answered. “I’m gonna challenge you for that championship you have.”

Taken aback by how brazen the newcomer was Seth couldn’t help but ask “You sure about that?”

Dean had only shrugged and gave the other man his killer smile and answered. “A far as I can see, you’re the only one worth fighting around here.” He answered then walked away towards his locker.

Seth was instantly intrigued by him, and a little more than annoyed. No matter what was going to happen, he was sure it was going to be interesting when it involved Dean Ambrose.

But what he had thought would just be a gimmick to make a big splash into the developmental pool, was quickly proven wrong once Dean actually approached him before their match to talk strategy. Though he had been bold enough to challenge him outright, he was not the type to just pull crap off in the middle of the ring, at least not if he can help it. He wanted to see if Seth had any ideas on how to make their match a little more exciting. They had quickly traded ideas here and there about what to do and when.

“You a flyer right?” Dean asked.

“Yeah,” Seth answered side-eying the other man.

“Got any tricks I gotta be prepared for?” he asked.

“No, I don’t do that stuff as much here.” He explained.

“Why the fuck not?” the blond asked.

“Have had a couple of accidents already. The space between the ring and the barriers is barely five feet, makes jumping out the ring risk the audience. Plus couple of the other guys have dropped me before. Mercury has advised against it unless we’d worked on it before.” He answered as he did his pre-match stretches.

There was a pause between them as they made their respective preparations for their match. It wasn’t until they had less than five minutes left for their entrance when Dean had added.

“You should do it. Fly out the ring, it would be awesome.” He said, which made the younger man chuckle but clearly not agree with him. “I’d catch you.”

Seth looked at Dean in the eye. He had seemed pretty sure of himself, but he’s pretty sure that’s just his default mode. Seth was still unsure.

“Listen, I know we haven’t ever been the ring together before but I can promise you I ain’t like one of the numbskulls.” Dean looked at Seth sternly, sounding more serious than he ever has. “I’m not gonna drop you.”

Those were his last words before he had gone and made his entrance in the FCW ring, leaving Seth to make a split second decision before he made his own entrance. Dean was right, he and Seth have never been in the ring together. He had figured that was the main reason why they had given Dean the ok to jump right into the championship pool so quickly. Indie fans were excited to see Jon Moxley and Tyler Black finally face off. It was that reminder that Dean basically came from where Seth had come from himself. Dean was right, he wasn’t like the numbskulls NFL rejects who’s botched matches before. Dean more than capable of doing exactly what he said he’d do. With a deep breath, Seth finally made a decision and made his own entrance.

It was at the end of their first fight in FCW when Seth knew for certain Dean was exactly who he said he was, and then some. He was good. There was no question about it. Seth hadn’t really even doubted it knowing where he’d come from. What really stood out for him was though they had never fought each other before, their first FCW fight was the smoothest match Seth had fought in a long time. It just flowed so easily. Where Seth would move one way, Dean was right there to counter, which Seth would do so in return. It felt like they’d been fighting for forever. At one point when Dean was outside the ring, Seth had taken the plunge and flew between the ropes on towards the other man. Just like Dean had said he would, he grabbed him in mid-air then safely got both of them on the ground. It was awesome. He and Dean just seemed to click.

After years of being on the road together, fighting together, fighting each other, that chemistry just seemed to grow between them. Which made their current fighting in Black and Brave just be a constant move and response between the two men. Smiles on their faces and aches in their bodies, it was clear to anyone and everyone who were watching them that they were having more than fun. Neither had even realized they had been fighting for a good 30 minutes already, and it had only ended when Dean had an exhausted Seth on his back and reminded the other man it was probably lunch time.

They had all regrouped around the snack table by the side of the gym. The kids had gone to their common kitchen and grabbed water for everyone. They sat and ate their sandwiches while in companionable chatter.

“Seth,” Alex, one of the teens spoke. “Tell Mrs. Rollins thanks for the sandwiches. They’re really good.”

“Actually,” Seth had slung his arm around Dean’s shoulder. “Dean had actually prepared them.”

The surprised looks on their faces seemed funny to Seth but a little insulting to Dean “Don’t worry, it’s not like I put razor blades in them.” Which had gotten more than one of them suspiciously looking between the bread they were holding.

“Don’t worry… I was there when he made them.” Seth joked. “They’re safe.”

They had continued to eat their sandwiches. Everyone in the group making small talk and goofing around. When it came time to clean up, one of the students had spoken up.

“Can I ask a question?” he asked.

“Sure, Jesse what’s on your mind?” Seth asked the younger man with dark curls.

“How do you, like, make up your character?” he asked, his eyes shyly darting more towards Dean.

“Well, that’s a little advance for this stage Jes,” Seth tried to change the topic.

“No, I know.” He had nodded. “I’m just curious…” he clearly wanted to say something but was having a hard time doing so. “I’ve been a fan of yours since Moxley.” He finally admitted.

“Have you?” Dean asked a little more than surprised. “How old are you kid?”

“19,” he admitted again.

“You must have been 10 the last time I was Moxley,” Dean pointed out. “You were not old enough to have seen any of my old stuff.”

“My brother showed them to me, when I was a kid.” He explained. “He did it to scare me at first, which I kinda did, but looking at them now. You were… insane.”

That had made the two superstars chuckle. Seth remembered the first time he had met Dean all those years ago. They had met at a party of a common friend of theirs. Someone they had both worked with at different times and at different companies. It was just by chance they were performing in a town nearby.

Seth had walked in with his buddies and got introduced to Dean and his coworkers. They didn’t really hang out that night, preferring to stick to their own circle of friends. It was only when one of Dean’s coworkers had brought out a camera and told Dean to bring out Moxley for them. An impromptu promo in the middle of a party where the guy was already more than a couple of drinks in. Seth couldn’t help but want to watch the trainwreck he assumed it was going to be. Seth thought there was no way this was going to end well. The man in question had just stood behind the kitchen counter gave himself a slight slap on the face and motioned for the camera guy to go.

Seth was so wrong. Yes, Dean was more than a little drunk. Yes, he had looked ridiculous with douchy shaded on indoors in the middle of the night. Yes, this seemed like a dumb idea. But Dean made it all seem to work. Right in front of his eyes, he saw the man transform from Dean to Jon Moxley. He had heard about him; people threw around words like crazy, and unhinged, and unpredictable. It wasn’t until you saw it up close when you realized what they were talking about. They were right. Dean as Jon Moxley was that and more.

“Thanks kid,” Dean had only smiled and took another sip of his water.

“I mean, I don’t mean to pry. I know you’re a pretty private guy…” he spoke more today than Seth has heard him all year. “But like, how’d you get to sound like that? Like any of the stuff you said like true?”

All eyes were now turned towards Dean. The students seemed to have been on this weird combination of excitement and also a bit of fear, not really knowing how the older man would respond.

“I mean, yeah.” Dean answered and put down his bottle of water. “Some of it was true. I mean if you’re asking how it started that way, that’s basically it. You start by telling the truth.” His answer only seemed to have made the students more confused. “It all comes from a certain truth you believe. I mean you don’t have to divulge each and every little thing about you. But what you do go out there and share better be something you believe in, coz when you don’t they’ll see right through you.”

“The first character I had was like a varsity blues football player with some other guy I don’t remember. It really didn’t mean anything to me, coz it wasn’t me. I was trying to act like a big dog knowing shit I didn’t know and claiming accomplishments that weren’t mine and you know what happened?” he asked. “They chewed me up and spat me out.”

“It wasn’t until I guess about your age when I started to kinda see something a little closer to home. Like the varsity blue guy was popular, athletic, top tiered… everything I didn’t really feel like I was.” He spoke slowly and carefully like Seth could see him pick his memories out from his past. To be honest, he hadn’t heard Dean open up like this in a while.

“The truth was, or at least what I had grown up to be the truth was more or less the opposite. I wasn’t the popular kid, I was the pariah. I wasn’t really athletic, other than wrestling, I didn’t really give a shit about my body other than taking care of it so I could wrestle. I wasn’t top tiered, I wasn’t even on the damn cake. I below that. I was a gutter rat. Just white trash street urchin bum. No one really thought more of me. Being successful in anything, much less professional wrestling, was the furthest thing anyone would have ever thought of me to do.”

Though the man spoke straight and clearly, Seth was trying to spot any sort of clue to how he was really feeling about telling these kids about all of this. Like Jesse had mentioned, Dean was very private. He really wanted to make sure his friend wasn’t feeling pressured to speak like this.

“There was a point I wanted to bury all that, and maybe the varsity blue guy would have been able to do that, but it didn’t. Instead of trying to become something I just really was not, I started to curve towards being exactly who everyone thought I should be and go beyond that. Like if they were gonna think I was just some white trash piece of shit, then let them.”

Seth heart ached. He knew Dean’s earlier character was based a little bit on the reality that was Dean’s childhood, but even he was never sure what was true and what was not. He had never really tried to ask. Hearing his friend open up so casually about something so heartbreaking was troubling. He was tempted to stop but seeing the kids almost just as affected as he was, and seeing that Dean was not stopping himself. Seth had decided to let the other man speak till he was ready to stop.

“Like, did I grow up poor? Was my mom a whore? Did I sell drugs to survive living on the streets? Whether or not anyone knew the true answers to any of these questions was irrelevant. The point was those were stuff that was expected of me the way I was and how I had come to be… People basically fucking looked down on me like I was something they had stepped on…” his voice wavering on sad at the end but he composed himself before he added “And that was ok.”

“How is any of that ok?” Jesse asked in disbelief.

Dean had sat up straight, looking up at the boy who sat across from him, then gave him a big and genuine smile before answering “Coz I was gonna prove them all wrong.”

Seth was right. Bringing Dean here was a good idea, and his kids were learning something valuable. But apart from that, Seth was learning something valuable too. Seth always thought he was lucky to have Dean the way their friendship was. He realized luck had nothing to do with it. Dean fought to get here, to get this far. Seth was realizing how blessed he was with Dean, and he refuses to ever forget that.

[creaturempath-blog]

2 + 5

2. Do they have any daily rituals? + 5. Cleanliness habits (personal, workspace, etc.) // @magicalxwarriorsdetailed headcanons

i have @letaunloved to thank for allowing me to brainstorm so much of newt’s morning routine while talking to her…

the primarily ritualistic part of his day comes from waking up . though the time at which he wakes up may vary ( as he’s been up as early as 0440 , to as late as 0530 ) , the procedure of his morning typically remains consistent , save for special circumstance which will be discussed later on . his morning is comprised , as follows …

* wake ( quickly , on his feet within five minutes ) quietly , as not to disturb leta* check on pickett , asleep in the pocket of newt’s coat or awake . if awake , he joins newt for the morning routine * charge the kettle for his tea while he heats water in a separate pot* head to his creatures ( downstairs in his basement is where he has more room , versus in his case ) to begin preparing their meals* diet prep consists of many things happening at once … and so that everything will finish in a relatively simultaneous manner ( everything finishes within ten minutes, due to his practise and precision ) the following order things is initiated & followed…       – large pot/s of water put upon the stove , water brought to a boil       – variety of starchy or otherwise firm vegetables ( such as beets , yams , asparagus , cabbage , carrots , green beans , squash , etcetera ) placed in water to boil       – other vegetables and fruits are peeled ( as necessary , depending upon which creatures are receiving what on a given day – for instance , dougal could eat cantaloupe and appreciate having the rind attached so he may handle the fruit more cleanly , whereas mooncalves ( if treated ) would not be able to wholly digest the rind ) , and scraps ( seeds , stringy pulp , skins ) are placed in a designated bucket* at this point , newt will likely flick his wand to begin steeping tea upstairs       – separate pots of water are warmed ( not boiled ) to allow nutrition biscuits ( which newt crafts himself , using specific dietary requirements he has come to understand through his wealth of knowledge and practice ) to soak & soften , seeing as they are dried and quite firm after being cooked . ( reference )       – once vegetables finish boiling , they are coupled with the soft vegetables & fruits and chopped up .              ~ there are about 9 kilos of fruit / vegetables to be distributed when it’s finished       – all manner of nutrition biscuits are drained & let to sit* with another flick of his wand , newt quickly finds himself with a cup of tea and a scone on a saucer that he can enjoy while he continues working with the diets … or if he’s a bit ahead in his standard pacing , he’ll dart upstairs for a cuppa and come back down      – a variety of buckets , bowls , and troughs are brought out , having been cleaned from yesterday’s meals      – newt begins distributing the meal materials as necessary , including supplements ( natural ; in their raw or powdered ( dehydrated & ground ) form – no pills , excessively few liquids ) as needed for each creature’s diet .       – newt retrieves the “ simple ” meal components that don’t need additional preparation ( the mooncalves’ pellets , earthworms , mealworms , grubs , doxy & fairy eggs , and whathaveyou ) and typically fastens them to himself in some way , usually some sort of sack * newt brings out meats from their cold storage so they may defrost so he can attend to them after he does his rounds* diets are taken with him periodically , as he typically levitates 4 - 6 diets with him as he begins visiting each enclosure / individual creature . he greets them , feeds them , and moves on . * once diets are distributed , he goes back around and cleans smaller enclosures himself to spend more time with creatures as he does so. he gets the attention of the giant dung beetles to have them roll any dung from the large enclosures ( graphorns , erumpent , griffin , etc. ) into the manure pile ( which , thankfully, has an odor-proofing magicked barrier around it ) to decompose* the scraps from fruits & vegetables , and any dying vegetation from within enclosures are composted and , during growing seasons  for the various flora of his creatures’ environments , he uses the combined decomposed manure + compost for fertilisation .* once that’s finished , he comes back and prepares his meat diets if it’s not a fasting day for the carnivorous creatures ( to simulate a missed catch in the wild ) before distributing them and cleaning those enclosures .* the entire diet prep process repeats , barring supplements , for evening meals that are stored ( refrigerated ) until they are needed for dinners .* newt typically finishes all of this by 1200 - 1300 , though more closely to 1210 .* he then takes a shower before continuing on with his day

after everything pertaining to diets is done , the order to his day is more loosely set . he likes maintaining a schedule , but for the most part , he has grown flexible enough ( versus a rigid , preferred lifestyle of his youth ) to allow for a bit of spontaneity .

not going to lie i sort of burned myself out writing that top one so this is going to be relatively quick & simple …

newt !! is !! a clean !! person !! in his line of work it’s very easy to get very dirty in a short amount of time , but he’s quick to wash himself as needed . he dislikes the feeling of dirt lingering on him if he’s not doing anything remotely close to creatures , outdoors-y , or the like . he’s uncomfortable in his own skin as it is , so the addition of lingering mud or dirt when it’s not necessary or expected is somewhat unwelcome . 

that said , however , clean and hygienic as he is , he has been known for a somewhat disheveled appearance ( five o’clock shadow from not shaving in a morning , perhaps even missing a spot when he does , curly hair uneven due to his habit of cutting it himself , visible scars or cuts on his hands / arms / face , pants too short for his long legs , and other smaller things pertaining to his clothing choice ) to some that meet him .