#so food for everyone in my house is 60 to 80

[majorasnightmare]

todays mood has been oozing in bed wishing i had the money for fast food while rotating retail worker!dirge in my head because its technically canon

[nice-bright-colors]

Stuck between a rock…

…and a hard place.

Warning: Ranting to follow.

Nothing has been going my way this year. It has taken far too long to get started on things, and I still need to wait another month. It’s been 14 months since this work was first initialized.

I’m tired of waiting.

I’ve also come to the realization that I’m rarely happy, unless I’m working, or alone.

Attempting to plan something for us to do requires: a) food she can eat, b) bathrooms that aren’t “outdoorsy”, c) relative easy conditions, d) more food because god forbid she goes 3-1/2 hours without eating, e) beers that aren’t anywhere near the hoppy side, f) don’t get me started on hard seltzer or cider, g) air conditioning, h) shade, because the sun is bad, i) me to figure out how to get there, j) me to drive, k) me to figure out a place to stay, l) me to get us tickets, m) did I mention the snacks required in between meals, n) more water than is humanly possible to consume, o) must have a scenic view, p) it would help if there are no people, q) must have some shopping to do there, and r) if there’s something therapeutic or whole earth body thing about it that will help.

At least when I travel for work, I’m making money. Plus I’m getting reimbursed for money I’m spending. Most of all, I’m alone.

No. This month has a trip planned for us to go visit my family in Michigan. It will also be our 28th wedding anniversary weekend. Let’s see, shall we…

1) 85 year old Aunt has fallen twice in the last months. Plus she’s had a concussion. Plus they think she might have the start of dementia. 2) 80 year old Father has learned his car frame has a crack, and can’t afford anything new. Plus has forgotten numerous things over the last few months. Plus does nothing but watch MSNBC all day. Plus has imminent kidney failure. Plus doesn’t want to start dialysis. Plus wants me to eat a steak with him to reminisce about something he did for my 19th birthday (over 32 years ago). Plus has verbally told anyone who’ll listen he is ready to die. 3) My BIL has gambled away whatever money he had from his parents dying. Plus the $40K my Father have them. Plus has failed to secure disability for 3 years now (guess what? they’ve probably followed you to the casino). 4) My 53 year old sister will be lucky if she makes it to 60. Her matriarchal lineage would have her on track to die at 65. 5) My 59 year old cousin has graciously invited everyone to her house, when she has gone on record to not allow my BIL or nephew there anymore. 6) My 20 year old nephew doesn’t work, is afraid of everything and everyone, absolutely hates his father, and is threatening to run away to the arms of an older man in Florida.

I’m just so tired of having to manage and do everything for everyone else. Tired of being the rock in this family that is stoic enough for everyone.

I really hope I can coast Oct - Feb on this shit down in San Antonio. Then if nothing else comes my way, my ass will be buying a single, one-way ticket to “who fucking knows, and don’t fucking ask”. Never to be seen or heard from again.

Fín.

[kerubimcrepin]

Episode 17 - Toothache

These look like various different armours. Interesting.

One of the very, very rare times Kerubim says "Jojo", and not "Joris" or "my Jojo".

Considering how fast he came, chances are he was outside, listening in to Kerubim searching for the tooth. He is so real for that.

Joris gets a pass for not being normal about Kerubim and his stories because he's 7. I won't make fun of him. He's baby.

(Kerubim doesn't get a pass for not being normal about Joris because he's like 60-80, and should go to therapy, instead of compensating for his fail orphanage childhood and divorce. It's equality. To me.)

Yes, his spine always hurts. Yes, he's also still very good at acrobatics and parkour, as all adventurers should be. He contains multitudes.

Peace and love in the World of Twelve. Also, Kerubim's fruity stance here...

He loves sharing things that make him happy with Joris. It's very cute. But also Joris is like 7, so I don't know what he's expecting.

Maybe he's trying to raise him with a love for selling things to people, so that one day he will continue the family business.

Bad news: Joris's main interest as an adult, while manning the store, is Bullying The Customers. Bullying them until they start to cry or call him slurs.

And are these... "assistants" in the room with us, right now?

Also: Kerubim knits, as can be gauged from the yarn balls with the knitting needles in them. At least he is putting that yarn ball addiction that has been alluded in the first episodes (before Simone cleaned up) and which will be fully revealed in episode 49, The Jellivision, to a good use.

I just know that before coming out, they had a talk that went something like:

"And then, when I clap, my Jojo, you will jump onto the counter, with milk! Imagine how happy it would make the customer."

"Yay papycha!"

Yet again, everyone in this household loves to jump onto tables. This will not change in even 600 years. Manlets. Littlefellas. Shortguys.

Joris is more won-over by Keke's customer tactics than the customer. A likely thing for Joris to be.

I want to point out that, at literally no point during the series, except for the racing episode, do we see Kerubim actually go to Brakmar, or really explore the Sidimote Moors.

I wonder if he has something to hide.

(Atcham. I am yet again talking about Atcham.)

Despite wanting to act like he's cool and lucky, Kerubim does actually put in the time to research what waits him where he's going. Especially when he knows it's going to be dangerous. It's an interesting contrast to the way he was in the Unikron episode.

I suppose it's very likely that that story happened before this one, and he's matured.

(Though it doesn't mean he isn't wrong about things sometimes.)

Truly, he is the male version of Lina Inverse.

Food moment: I am not describing all of them, but man, those sure are fruits and veggies.

This implies that Kerubim has used the tooth for cleaning before, either cleaning the house, or cleaning himself. No wonder he's so beautiful.

I will be real, if I was Kerubim I would like. Do unspeakable evils upon Simone. I would make her tea with salt for a week. He is more patient than all of us.

Dead.

Yeah, not even being the best and the prettiest can save this. It's over.

[kattahj]

Rules: List 10 of your comfort shows, then tag 10 people

Tagged by @katiekeysburg about a month ago. This took me forever, sorry!

Tagging some mutuals from my notes: @minutia-r @sorry-bonebag @re-bee-key @theendofcake @beccaelizabeth315 @anotherlovr @lotesseflower @morathicain @firlalaith @lena221bee

Interpreting this as shows I watch when I want to feel happy and warm and cared for. I don't often rewatch shows, so some of these are ongoing and others are just ones that made me feel good when I did watch them.

Apologies to all the other feel good shows I've had along the way thst didn'tmake the cut. :-)

What's My Line: A game show from the 50s/60s where the panel guesses people's occupations, and also who the celebrity guest is (they're blindfolded for that one). If you want to watch light banter, low-stakes games (extra points are frequently handed out), and hear about jobs you didn't even know existed, this is perfect. Available on YouTube for free, too!

Taskmaster: Another low-stakes game show, this time with celebrities having to perform absolutely ridiculous tasks. This frequently involves not so much thinking outside of the box as thinking outside of the planet. Also, the two hosts have an amusingly dom/sub thing going on.

Queer Eye: Five gay people come to a person, or sometimes a group of people, to fix up their appearance, home, and personal lives. The results can be quibbled with sometimes, but for the most part, this is like a warm hug.

Ghosts: A young couple move into a house that turns out to be haunted. Since they're now so deep in debt that they can't move, they have to make friends with the ghosts. Exists in two versions, UK and US. The UK fans will swear up and down that theirs is the only good version, but the truth is that both are good, and as a comfort show specifically, the US version may be more effective, since it's softer and cuddlier.

Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts: In the future, humans live underground, mutated animals ("mutes") roam the earth, and everyone is at each other's throat. Until a girl named Kipo accidentally ends up on the surface and decides to make friends with all the animals, which she turns out to be surprisingly good at. Also, there's lots of singing.

Press Gang: Childhood favourite show that still holds up, about a group of teenagers making a newspaper together. Good drama, good humour, and also, the editor is a smart, ruthless girl named Lynda, who has lots of Belligerent Sexual Tension with Spike, one of the reporters and resident rebel, in a classic 80s/90s romantic trope. In case that's your kind of thing. :-)

She-Ra and the Princesses of Power: Girl who was stolen by the Evil Horde as a child discovers that she's actually the destined hero of the Princess Alliance, their enemies. Sweet story, very queer, and with surprisingly nuanced villains. Doesn't quite measure up to Kipo in my book (I know most people disagree), but almost.

Julie and the Phantoms: Musically gifted teenager discovers that the ghosts of a dead rock band "lives" in her garage. From the creator of High School Musical, but so much better. Sadly cancelled after only one season (very unfortunate timing with covid).

And since I've been watching all these Asian QLs lately, naturally I need to add the softest of those:

She Makes My Heart Flutter: Short and sweet about a lesbian bar owner who gets her routine changed when her niece comes to work for her. Only takes a little bit more than an hour to watch, and it's lovely the whole time.

Old Fashion Cupcake: Office romance about a 39-year-old manager whose midlife crisis is interrupted with the help of the 29-year-old working for him, who dares him to try new things and experience life like a young girl would. Lots of tasty food in addition to the romance.

[steege-jpt3391]

Blog Post #14: The Family Game by Morita Yoshimitsu

As much as I love Japanese black-and-white films from the 60s, I am very happy that we are finally getting into the 80s films! To be honest, I was getting a little bit tired of films with postwar narratives or ones trying to depict the difficulty of Japan’s transition from tradition to modernity, so I’m glad that we are starting to tackle new issues with different directors. I believe that “The Family Game” was a great film to kick things off. “The Family Game” follows the story of the Numata’s, a clear-cut of what a modern Japanese family should look like: an uptight salaryman racking in the money to support the family, the good-for-nothing housewife who keeps things tidy at home, and two sons who could not be more opposite. However, the dynamic greatly begins to shift after Yoshimoto, the tutor Mr. Numata hired to get Shigeyuki’s grades up, enters the household. Yoshimoto’s character was one that I still am not really able to wrap my head around because of his odd mannerisms and his severity towards Shigeyuki’s studies, but it’s evident that because of his strong sense of personality, it greatly changed the family’s dynamic. Mrs. Numata becomes more and more lethargic by the day, Shigeyuki is becoming a star student and shooting for the top high school, and Shinichi starts to slack in his studies and even announce he wants to drop out. All these events show the fragility of a traditional family dynamic and how once some external force comes into play, things fall out of place.

I thought this film was a very clever critique of the Japanese middle-class family dynamic of the 1980s and I especially loved how all of that was deconstructed through Yoshimoto entered the Numata family. His actions were far from what was normal for that time, doing everything from slapping Shigeyuki until his nose bleeds to sensually touching Mr. Numata’s hand at the dinner table. The satirical commentary on how a traditional family operates proves to be quite effective as it takes all the traditional roles of a family and flips them on its head. The older brother is supposed to be the role model but at the end of the film, it’s the other way around. The father is supposed to be the patriarchal head of the house but is a heavy drinker who can’t communicate with his sons or wife.

I thought it was very interesting to analyze what Yoshimoto’s role truly was because he is depicted in the film as a tutor. I thought this could almost represent that he is a teacher of Japan’s family dynamics and his job is to enter households and break families apart. Morita used Yoshimoto as a device to critique traditional roles in a patriarchal household and in making him a tutor, he served as an educator to the whole of Japan on how fragile these family dynamics built upon individual roles are. In a complex environment like a family, it does not succeed on everyone doing their part. The only time we really see the family come together is when they are cleaning up the mess Yoshimoto made after Shigeyuki’s celebratory dinner. They all worked together to clean up, and it was Yoshimoto who forced them into doing this because he decided to start a food fight. The satirical elements were very clever because while I was dying laughing at Yoshimoto throwing spaghetti at Mrs. Numata with no reaction, it was almost as if Yoshimoto was scolding the whole family for how disjointed they had become. Overall, it was a banger indeed and I’m looking forward to more films of this caliber in the future.

[littleharpethcrossfit]

Thursday, 2 November, 2023.

We should be enjoying sunny, near 60 degree weather at 4 PM. Perfect for Outdoor CrossFit.

Warmup

4 Rounds

10 PVC Squat Snatch's

10 Banded Pull-Aparts

Strength

Dumb Bell Snatch's: 1 / 1 X 10

Gradually Progress Weight As Long As You Can Lock-Out

and Control DB At The Top. Drop heavy DB's In The Pine-

Straw For Safety.

Ed/Larry=80 Sam=75 Dana/Armando=65 Herb=60 Coach/Chad=50 Paul/Joe/Sue=40 Alicia/Cherrita=35 Shannon=20 Shane/Sabrina/Kayla/No Name/Linda=PJ

WOD

12 Minute AMRAP

9 Power Snatch's ( 95 / 75 / 55 )

15 / 12 Calories Any ERG

30 Double-Under's ( 50 Single's )

SCORE: Rounds and Fractions

Dana=5 2/3* Kayla/Alicia/Armando=5 Ed=5* Larry=4 2/3** Sam/Coach/Sue/Cherrita=4 2/3 Joe=4 1/3 Paul/Herb/Shannon/Chad=4 Sabrina/Shane/No Name/Linda=P

Wine and snacks and convivial discussions post-WOD.

Notes:

Paul, who has the fabled high-end vacation home on 30A, is never here. He thinks he is a long-time consistent LHCF member, but in fact he is about a 20% member. Actually, he thought Alicia was just now visiting from Pittsburg. Paul kept asking when did we start having so much good food at the Thursday wine and snack party, and everyone kept saying it started Pre-Covid. Paul is so 2019 that he voted for Hillary.

NOW, Kayla is complaining that I am not including her and who-ever she is currently in an Instagram life-time forever NOW-CUPID relationship with in this high level influencer blog. I explained to her that this Blog space is extremely valuable and that many people are contending for attention. I can't waste your time with such frivolous people. BTW, I am not supposed to tell you that her "friend" didn't come today (Excuse Number 23) because he twisted his ankle. WHaaa !!

The post-WOD wine and snacks were as usual beyond expectation. Alicia's Buffalo (WHY?) dip with celery and chips is enough to make any man fall in love. Also there was Miss Linda's big platter of sloppy Joe buns, and Kayla's big platter of chicken sliders. Paul was seen eating at least 3 of each buns, washing them down with glugs of only the highest rated wines.

The after-WOD lasted about 2 hours until Ruth Anne made Shane pack up and go home. Before this the Birthday Song was sung for Sam (42? 46?), and several people participated in spanking Sam as he laid himself over the compliant lap of Miss Sue.

An unexpected distraction was that the non-American speaking workers who are currently remodeling the Buck Mansion-House could not go home because their van would not start. Fortunately we had alien speaking members who also had jumper-cables who were willing to help them. Somehow I suspect that this was added to my expense account.

Saturday at 0730 and at 0900.

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

8.26.23 Saturday

Yey! No work tomorrow but no day off for me...hahah... and huhuh...

Angels, I badly need a job and money and I just wanna compete in a good way that I can speak English and if americans will tell me that I have a problem hey! JOE AND JANE YOU GUYS AREN'T PERFECT!

I need a job and money angels, it is challenging for me to master this "fucking job" but really challenging.... This call center thingy... But I wanna think of it as a game... I want my wave-mates in 468 to grow as a mature agent of Iqor...

It is just weird, I feel fat, ugly and old angels... I wanna be skinny suddenly, seeing Tin2x one of my wavemates but she is still on her 20's...

10:55 am

Well,that's life people will say they care for you but they have different deep within... I have no guilty feelings coz I'm real...

I just need money and I feel irritated working in a call center, the flow of character of people are all different with each other... You can't expect a true friendship but there is... I have to stand alone and flow and just be thankful on some new good souls along the way... I just wanna work coz I need money and I wanna beat the job of course... There will be intimidation and complexities...

I started to work and bloom in Cebu Pacific Air... Where I felt that I was loved by and cared by those people that I considered my FRIENDS....They never put me in the middle of shame... They always covered me with their wings... I bloom and somehow they wanted me to flip my wings but I'm always a child... Now that I can they are all gone...

Sometimes I wanted to cry but my real friends are all gone... I can't flip my wings coz the people around me now simply wanted to smash me...

12:06 noon

I'm so happy I'm able to fix my baby John's ears... Now his ear dirt is normal... Normal ear dirt of dogs are just like the earwax of human's ears...

But I need some collagen on my hands and feet and most specially down there...

12:41 noon

I need help angels, for oil,ginger,onion and garlic plus the chicken cubes for Neko and Lalah...

I will pay the gasul... Still, waiting for Uncle Jun's sponsored food...

Thinking of our body soap here and I need to do my laundry...

Angels, I'm having a hard time here... I paid Ely as well just a 1/4 of my entire credit...

John changes his behaviour since this Thursday crime but he loves to eat bread... If this dog will die, I will go with my dog...Coz I know there is a ritual in this world... So, frustrating I can't go up or can't prove myself... I never have the chance to travel as well.

I'm so frustrated... I wanted oven and I wanted a collagen....

1:06 pm

It feels like someone is dead in this house... Where is Judas?

1:24 pm

This ate Liza is tanga2x stupid and tuso! Will explain later...Not a true friend...

Ate Liza is communicating with the other seller of food and store like the other carinderiaz...They are updating each other angels...

Ate Liza is just copying ate Cha....Then, ate Cha and her husband went to Japan already... And I figured out it from the past months that this Ate Cha is communicating with ate Liza...

I went to other carinderia'Z that if I can buy an 80 pesos adobo instead of 60 pesos, the other carinderia'Z said it can't be that way... I just need to buy 2 separate 60 pesos chicken adobo, I asked a favour if they can make it 80 pesos on 1 order...

I went to Ate Liza she is just copying other people's decision... Meaning will never be real on me...

People in my wave are innocent...There are wealthy kids in call center and some are owning a car... I feel sad and it is really depressing in my part.Those rich kids are just wanting to sit and earn all day but there are wealthy kids.... My Uncle's are innocent as well... Those wealthy kids they just acquired the skills a long time ago and happy earning and simply sitting but it took time for them to learn it as well...But! My point it doesn't mean it is just a call center everyone is poor... There are some wealthy or rich or upper kids inside the call center.

1:59 pm

That Aunt Teresa is on her "silent snapping" and if I sent a message Uncle DD will text or call me...It sounds weird but analyze the situation angels.

Uncle DD is receiving the fundings from Japan if there is or will cover or shoulder...

I will pay the gasul and I don't have extra...

3:23 pm

I just need to rest and later will do my laundry... I need to drink tea later as well coz I feel super bloated...

Hmm... About the new girl I figured out that she is already having a one son when she was 15 years old... Well, I was able to work with her professionally yesterday... She is just 20 or 21 years old having a 6 years old son...Her name is Angie ,she is a blonde girl and super skinny smaller than me...

I still wanna acquire the skills in Iqor, my aim is to beat the job nothing else.. I wanted to be a product manager but I know some people inside the room didn't accept me and I'm fine with it...

Remember that I posted here that I have so many things to explain and I didn't have time to make a long explanation here... This is the moment while resting...

Wait....

3:34 pm

First I didn't know anything at the backstage of Iqor... I don't have guilty emotions on something or on someone...

I did enter having a clean slate....I was and still never a judgemental... I did and do respect people's character.... But I'm not sure if I can keep my clean slate coz I'm adjusting to the nature of job in call center... Meaning being in the call center is different on other industries or companies that I worked with way back... I really wanna beat the nature of the job! I feel offended and degraded...

I was in Cebu Pacific Air my position there was "ground attendant or CSA ( customer service associate)"

Being a Product Manager it is not about being the master of the floor... For example my previous manager or supervisor in Cebu Pacific Air can get the title of being a Manager or Supervisor or Team Leader even without knowing the entire flow of the call center floor. Coz he is already old and having wisdom in the world and he knew how to balance the situation in the work fleld...This is somehow difficult to understand for matured people only....

Well, I'm just explaining here if they can't accept me well then it's fine... But I still wanna dig deeper on Iqor who to target for me to be able to stay and get the skills as in master it and go up and be a leader as well...

In my wave at 468, since I'm again a newbie in the call center world... I chose Mia or Bella to be our team leader if ever we are going to be in the same group when time comes that we are going to be on the floor of Iqor... Coz they will never kick me out if I have struggles on the floor.

Mia is my friend and Bella is my sisterhood... But all of them are my wavemates and I have nothing against on anyone... It's just that I see something on Mia and Bella that I can't find on other people inside my wave at 468.

4:21 pm

I'm so scared angels my right foot is twisting again inward... I have right leg cramps... Argh! My pelvic is still aching...

7:35 pm

Thank God John ate his dinner with me... Probably he is angry when I'm not in the house..

I still feel panic and I still need money... I wanna do collagen on my feet and hands and down there... I wanna do gluta... I need to keep a job angels...

8:06 pm

Grrr... The water in our village is so slow on the faucet... Uncle Jun said probably coz everyone is in the house using water... I wasn't able to wash my clothes... Grrr....

Water,water,water please tomorrow... Return the normal flow of our water here in the village...

I wanna have dimple angels... I feel super ugly... I need botox... I need to keep a job... I need to fix my butt as well... I need a scrub...

9:21 pm

Classical music that I really like angels... Aside from procrastinating... It is so good to feel and close your eyes...

10:04 pm

Baby,Darling and Sweetheart...

Can you fucking marry me Mike??? I WANNA GO HOME MIKE ...

10:15 pm

Still here... Just here and I don't know....I feel so frustrated...

Mike???? Home... Home???

Hold-up??? Or Procrastinating???

10:55 pm

I feel bitter Mike... My film is flop Mike... Mike I wanna be a product manager but I need time.... I want to be admired by or own a company... I wanna have my own Pet Store... Now, this call center thingy I feel that it is really hellish but I need money Mike and I need a job... I'm losing xfactor as an individual... A lot of women went up but I'm always just a supporter for 16 years Mike... I feel fat, ugly,old and wrinkled...

I feel so ugly Mike... I feel so ugly and still self-pitying... I need money and I need to keep a job Mike... I need that "untouchable status"... It is not easy over the phone, I'm so offended Mike...

11:28 pm

Our lives are just like film Mike... I couldn't go up and be a star just for once...Since 2007 Mike, I'm always low and always the 2nd or last choice of everyone... Always a wall flower Mike... You didn't even care... I still have windblow trap... Dying for nothing... Even a real film of being a real Zombie now, can't even have it... Still, can't buy Starbucks... My S-bones are aching but I'm not guilty but they just keep on hurting me here...i

It is unfair to die Mike, it is unfair not to have or own the "dinosaurs" me, my baby-John other dogs that I love and some good souls like some family and friends and people along the way...

[copyrightcreep]

50. Left or right handed? roght handed (basic, i know) 51. Are you scared of spiders? only of their LONG THIN LEGS 53. Favorite foreign food? nasi goreng 54. Are you a clean or messy person? mix of the 2 55. Most used phrased? 'of course, of course' 'ah heck (hell) no' 56. Most used word? oki 57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 20 mins? 58. Do you have much of an ego? not at al pfff 59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? suck 60. Do you talk to yourself? all the time lmao 61. Do you sing to yourself? all the time yeppers 62. Are you a good singer? debatable 63. Biggest Fear? being alone and more specifically: having pushed everyone away by being myself/too much 64. Are you a gossip? sometimes. mostly about the living group members 65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? venom/venomlettherebecarnage 66. Do you like long or short hair? on myself: short hair. on other people midlenght and short hair. 67. Can you name all 50 states of America? nada 68. Favorite school subject? english and biology 69. Extrovert or Introvert? intorvert 70. Have you ever been scuba diving? nope, but i'd lke to 71. What makes you nervous? being alone too long. knowing the world will go one withut me 72. Are you scared of the dark? yeah. yeah i am 73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? all the time, is kinda a bad habit 74. Are you ticklish? sides, yes. belly/stomach, yes. feet and armpits, no. 75. Have you ever started a rumor? probably yeah. 76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? nope, people dont tend to let the mentally unstable in power psoitions 77. Have you ever drank underage? a friend convinced me to down a bunch of vodka shots. worst is mistake ever 78. Have you ever done drugs? nada 79. Who was your first real crush? probably my friend from elementary school 80. How many piercings do you have? 2, pierced my ears. 81. Can you roll your Rs?“ yeppers 82. How fast can you type? fastr as fuck boiiii 83. How fast can you run? not so fast as fuck boiii 84. What color is your hair? originally: brown blachish. currently: orange and yellow 85. What color is your eyes? grey/blue edge, green ring, brown around the pupils 86. What are you allergic to? nothing i know of 87. Do you keep a journal? i did at 1 point. until peope started looking in it 88. What do your parents do? my mom was a house cleaner. my dad is a gvernemtn man. he does the public lights and shit 89. Do you like your age? no. im old. make me 16 again 90. What makes you angry? the world, my past. inequality. 91. Do you like your own name? yepppp, i picked it myself! 92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? no babies in my house 93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? nada 94. What are you strengths? empathy, bravery and kidness 95. What are your weaknesses? trusting too easy, being too kind to people 96. How did you get your name? a friend helped me chose it. it's derived from my star sign 97. Were your ancestors royalty? buncha tiefs and ciminals. 98. Do you have any scars? this questio is in here twice 99. Color of your bedspread? white, soft blueish 100. Color of your room? white :(

The rest of the numbers for the ask thingy 👀

lets do thisss 1. What is you middle name? is gonn be Leon 2. How old are you? 20 3. When is your birthday? 14 of august 4. What is your zodiac sign? Leo 5. What is your favorite color? orange 6. What’s your lucky number? 8 7. Do you have any pets? a bunny named Mochi 8. Where are you from? space -i mean the netherlands 9. How tall are you? 5'8 (175 cm) 10. What shoe size are you? 41 11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 4. 1 pair work boots. 2 pair everyday shoe and 1 set flipflops 12. What was your last dream about? either space or dying. cant quite remember 13. What talents do you have? i do the writey writey of poems 14. Are you psychic in any way? yesarooni. i feel presences 16. Favorite movie? venom/Alien 17. Who would be your ideal partner? someone who knows me 18. Do you want children? nada 19. Do you want a church wedding? heck to the no 20. Are you religious? not exactly 21. Have you ever been to the hospital? multiple times. baby i'm wreck 22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? not that i remember? 23. Have you ever met any celebrities? depends on who's a celebrity. i've met dutch celebrity. 24. Baths or showers? baths for wallow tired times and showers for sport and swim 25. What color socks are you wearing? they be black with a green cactus and a yellow teriier 26. Have you ever been famous? nope 27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? only if i could use my influence to help people 29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? in the sauna yes. in the wild, no. 30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 4, sometimes 5. 31. What position do you usually sleep in? whatever gets me to fall asleep 32. How big is your house? average. 4 small bedrooms. 2 bathrooms. 1 seperate toilet. and 1 big livingroom and kitchen. 33. What do you typically have for breakfast? bread with butter and peanut butter 34. Have you ever fired a gun? nope 35. Have you ever tried archery? yes! i sucked- 36. Favorite clean word? popty ping or heck 37. Favorite swear word? fuck 38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 50 hours? 39. Do you have any scars? ...plenty. none of which i'm proud of. 40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? dont know, dont care tbh 41. Are you a good liar? when i want to/need to be 42. Are you a good judge of character? average. i trust a lil too easy heh 43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? not well, but i can do a belgium one. i also switch from american to british according to an old teacher. 44. Do you have a strong accent? when i speak english? yes. Dutch? not really. 45. What is your favorite accent? scottish and australian. 46. What is your personality type? cant be fucked to do the quiz. but i like people soemtimes and sometimes i dont. 47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? smash into pieces hoodie 48. Can you curl your tongue? yeppers 49. Are you an innie or an outie? innie

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 94. brb x oc

a/n: OHHHH MY GOOOOOOOOOD IM TOO EXCITED FOR THESE CHAPTERS

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: FLUFF, bea and roos have the B talk, let the Rooster Bee wedding shenanigans COMMENCE!!

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74/75/76/77/78/79/80/81/82/83/84

85/86/87/88/89/90/91/92/93

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2

@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes

-

No one really elaborates how stressful organizing a wedding really is, between writing the guests’ names and making sure to figure out everyone’s food allergies and diets it was already enough to make both sweat.

But on the bright side, they managed to get a date! Their wedding would happen in September, which was a short time all things considered but the wedding planner - that planned Martha’s wedding as well - assured them it’d go over smoothly. It was a ballroom but the wedding ceremony itself would happen on the outside, on the smooth freshly cut grass in between the fruit trees that surrounded the orchard area. It was a huge place with a lot of space and a bit far from their house itself but it was big enough to handle everyone.

Since Bradley’s family was the Navy, he had a few other friends - from Virginia - coming over and Beatrice wasn’t going to invite everyone from her aunt’s wedding, so the number would be more than enough for a small yet comforting ceremony.

With that out of the way, which was stressful enough, they had to worry about the invitations, about the cake and about their outfits. He didn’t want to wear a uniform, he loved it, but he preferred to wear a tux instead for their wedding day. Beatrice however was having a bit of a hard time…while she had in mind what her dress would look like, finding one with her measurements and within the budget was hard.

The plus size store that she wanted to see had no options left,they were all either rented or bought so she tried every other bridal site there was. She wondered if Evelyn knew anyone who could help her? She didn’t mind renting the dress for the wedding, so maybe she knew some bridal designer she could talk to?

“I kinda want a lemon curd cake.” Bradley’s voice snaps her out of her thoughts, looking up from the laptop with the pen in her mouth, seeing her fiancé walk into the room after brushing his teeth, “Ohhh…better yet, dark chocolate meringue, that is also nice.”

Beatrice laughs, pulling the pen from between her teeth to write it down on the notepad by her side, the pilot sliding onto the bed next to her, “I’ll write that down, we can figure something out tomorrow.”

He hums in agreement, supporting his head on his hand and watching as the brunette continues clicking away on the open tabs, chewing her lower lip, “Any luck finding the dress?” she shakes her head, tapping away on the search bar to be even more specific, “You’ll find something, baby.”

“I hope so.” she laughs awkwardly, “I’d hate to get married to you wearing a long cardigan and an old summer dress.” she was joking but part of her feared that’s what it’d happen. She knew it’d be difficult to find a wedding dress her size, she had seen Say Yes to the Dress many times and knew how hard it was for plus size people to find something that fits their vision and their bodies.

She didn’t want to get discouraged, she refused to get discouraged, at the very least she’d talk to Evelyn and ask her if she knew any other places that could help her. There had to be more than one, right? Even if she had to travel to get it, she’d make the sacrifice. But the more the looked, the more she searched,all the could see were brides slimmer than she was and she started to chew her lower lip even harder.

And Bradley, who knew her exceptionally well by this point, noticed how that was worrying her, “Baby,” he calls, gently grabbing the laptop from her and making Beatrice blink his way, “We already did a lot today, time for bed.”

“But–”

“You’ll find a dress, call Evelyn, see if she knows anyone.” he flipped the laptop shut, standing up to put it on the futon by the end of the bed and returning to the bed where Beatrice remained, rubbing her hands together, “Baby, look at me.” she looked at him with a small frown, one that made his smile soften and his lips touch the little wrinkle between her brows, “It’ll be okay, gorgeous. We’ll figure something out…we are managing it so far, aren’t we?”

‘Yeah…we’ve been…really lucky.” she says softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, “From the venue to the wedding planner…it’s like it was meant to happen. I just hope I can find a dress that I like, you know?”

“You will.” he smiles, lying on the bed and giving her enough space for her head to touch his shoulder and chest, her hands tucked between his side and her cleavage, her lower lip jutted out just enough to make him smile down at her, “You’ll look beautiful. Even more than before.”

That makes her lips quirk in a little smile, “Yeah?”

“Are you kidding? Hell yeah.” he leans down to kiss the top of her head, “You’ll look amazing, I think it’s a good idea if I don’t see the dress either, you know? Heard it’s bad luck.”

Plus the element of surprise would be more than welcome for both of them. Not to mention her mother wouldn’t allow him to see her, she was very aware of that, the tradition on that part would be maintained. Since Beatrice was Catholic but hasn’t entered a church since she was seventeen and Bradley who while he believed in some higher power was pretty much Agnostic, they chose to have a non-religious wedding.

Were her parents…surprised? Yes. Would they stop it? No, because it was pretty obvious now that Brad was now an honorary Schiavoni that all they wanted was ‘grandchildren’. So to them, as long as they got married and had rings on their fingers they were okay with it, they could let that slide with the babies coming along the way. 

Beatrice hasn’t told Rooster about her mother’s…schemes…on making her more fertile, the teas, the herbs, the quiet prayers she’d whisper under her breath whenever she visited…and she wondered if she should tell Brad about that. Because her parents wouldn���t be subtle about it, at all.

But Beatrice was nervous, she didn’t know how to bring that up to him.  They’d have to have that conversation, she knew about it. So maybe, ripping off the band-aid now might be the better option, “Brad,” he wasn’t asleep, thankfully, since his hand moved up and down her back, caressing the line of her spine with his fingertips, “You know…my parents might bother us about something else…soon.” his hand stops on the fourth vertebrae, she feels the subtle pressure there but he’s not pushing down in any way, “About…kids…” the last part is whispered so quietly she hopes he doesn’t hear it.

But he did. Obviously.

“I’m not in a hurry!” she tries to counter, lifting her head so quickly from his chest she almost gave herself whiplash, “I-I mean, I like kids but if you think we aren’t ready then we shouldn’t talk about it! Maybe I should stop talking about it, okay I’ll stop talking about it-” and she kept on rambling nervously, avoiding his eyes at all cost all the while Rooster just stared.

She couldn’t see the absolute infatuated stare he was sending her, nor the way his eyelids lowered and his smile widened by the second the more she tried to explain that she wasn’t going to force him to think about having kids now but she was just letting him know that her parents would question him about it and the more she spoke, more his heart warmed just by looking at her. Beatrice was very kind, very sweet and immensely thoughtful of others, she had proven that time and time again, so he wasn’t surprised to see her letting him know everything that could happen soon after they get married.

He’s still looking at her, holding his head up with a hand as Beatrice’s words slowly died down - she was now sitting on her knees, wringing her hands together and looking like she confessed a murder, biting her lower lip, “You got quiet.”

“I was waiting for you to finish, babe.”

“...Oh, I was rambling again…”

But he wasn’t bothered by that, he adjusted himself on the bed so he’d be sitting up instead of lying down, “We never talked about it.” he begins, “And I think it’s a good time as any to, you know?”

“Don’t you want to wait a little?”

He shrugs, “Why? I think it’s better if we decide what we want now and what to expect.” he says sincerely, reaching for her hand to remove it from the continuous wringing grasp she had on it, “So, let me ask you: do you want kids?”

Beatrice doesn’t hesitate, “Yes.I do…but…”

“But?”

“...if…you think it might be too much I can wait.”

Too much. As in, she didn’t want to make him stressed because of what he does, because she didn’t want him to be overworked. God, he loved her so much. “Bea…” he coos softly, giving her a smitten smile, “I love you so much, pretty girl. I really do.” his fiancé only response was a small smile and cheeks painted red, “And while I do appreciate you thinking about me and my wellbeing…I’ll be honest, imagining a mini me or mini you running around the house is really nice. And it’ll be a bit more work, but I think we’ll manage it. We just got to plan it a little bit.”

Beatrice’s shoulders relaxed and her eyes slid shut as she heaved out a sigh, her head dangling forward with her hands supporting her weight on her thighs, “You okay?’ he asks and she nods with her hair still covering her expression.

“I am. I was just…” she waves her hands,clenching and relaxing her fingers to get rid of the tension, “I was just nervous, as I said I don’t mind waiting a bit. I really don’t and I agree that planning for the baby–” she couldn’t believe she was saying those words out loud, “Would be the better option.”

“And you know, it won’t be for the lack of trying.” he says with his body slowly leaning forward, making Beatrice lean back until she fell onto the mattress, smiling up at him, “Because we do try, a whole lot, don’t we?” she nods, biting her lower lip with a smile, “And I know you’ve been taking the birth control shots so…maybe after the wedding you can stop taking it?”

Beatrice looks up at him with her big green eyes taking over his features,until she moves her gaze away in thought. She’s been taking it over six months now and it was the best idea she’s ever had, she thanked Shells over and over for letting her know that such thing existed…and honestly she could handle not taking it after their wedding, “I’d have to talk to the ladies at the clinic, see if I need to do it slowly or I can just stop altogether, but I can do that.” she says, smiling even more, one of her hands cupping the side of his face, “I like the idea of a mini us running around too.”

She didn’t tell him about the disembodied child voices she heard when he was gone, she didn’t think it’d be worth it, nor the drawings she made…nor the painting she still had to finish it and now…now she knew how to, “A mini us, huh?” he smirked, “I think the baby will look like you the most.”

“I think the baby will look like you the most. I don’t know what you have against your baby pictures, Brad.”

“Besides how I looked like an angry red toe? Nothing,” Beatrice rolls her eyes, saying he was adorable as a baby and as a young boy, “I was also blonde, how the hell did that happen?”

‘You are still blonde, Brad.” she laughs, gently touching a wavy strand that dangled in front of his forehead, “See? It’s just really dark now, almost brown.” there were golden strands mixed in with the browns; she even spread the tresses a little bit so he could see it better. He hummed, not convinced, before he flops down on top of her with his chin nestled between her breasts, the smiley t-shirt stretching under his weight. “Maybe the baby will be blonde like you.”

The corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk, “Do you want to try for it now-”

“Bradley Nicholas.”

“Oooh, I love when you say my full name,” he purrs, pushing himself to his hands so he could trail kisses from her neck to her lips, “It’s really hot when you say it.”

“I thought you said we were going to go to bed now?” she questioned, between giggles while arching her back so he could ride the shirt up to her chest.

“Mm…in a little bit.” he smirks, kissing her sternum, “Got a bit inspired now.”

-

Evelyn replied to her message as soon as the morning hit, she didn’t know how someone wakes up so early but Evelyn always surprised her. Beatrice took a few seconds to understand the message, since she was still waking up from hours ago - she is now used to waking up with Rooster but that doesn’t mean she stays awake for long, she was napping on the couch after he left. Beatrice rubs her eyes, sitting on the bed and then dropping the hand to gently caress Jolene on the back of the head as the pittie trots over to keep her company.

“If you want…” she mutters the rest of the message under her breath, pauses, then her eyes widen as she rereads it, “If you want to come over,Marcus has someone who can help you,I’m visiting him in a couple hours so I can pick you up and we can go!! Oh my God!” the sharp voice from her owner makes Jolene jumps up startled, before she’sd picked up by Beatrice who then kisses the pittie’s confused face over and over, “Yes!Oh thank God,I need to buy Evelyn those ube snacks she likes so much as payment! I’m going to get a dress!!”

Hopefully.

She was so excited that she immediately went up the stairs, with Jolene following her, to take a shower…but not before thanking Evelyn over and over and saying that she’d be waiting! She even sent Rooster a message, that she knew he’d be only able to reply a few hours later but she couldn’t help herself.

Beatrice sat outside on the small steps that led to her front door, her knee bouncing with excitement as she waited. It doesn’t take long for Evelyn’s car to show up, Beatrice standing up quickly before she rushes over to the open passenger door, ‘Hi, Ev.”

“Hey.” Evelyn smiles, “So, future Mrs.Bradshaw, you are looking for a wedding dress.” the mention of how she’d be referred to made Beatrice blush but she nodded after closing the door, “Marcus knows a lot of people who can help you out, we can explain our situation for him and you know he’ll want to help.”

“Thank you for helping me out.” the brunette says after Evelyn drives them away from the house, latching the seatbelt over her chest, “I was almost losing sleep over that, you know? It’s so hard finding a wedding dress my size.”

“And I know you tried everywhere, even that plus size shop we saw ages ago.”

“Yes! I couldn’t even go for a try on, most of the dresses I liked were already claimed for.”

Evelyn hummed, giving a quick once over around the roundabout before turning to the left, “Ever since that shop opened it has been a huge success, what do you know, people over size 2 want to get dresses too.” she jokes, both women laughing but Evelyn’s smile doesn’t falter, “I’m really happy for you.”

Beatrice turns to look at her friend, giving her a small smile, “I’m happy too Ev.” she whispers, holding her left hand up to look at the engagement ring one more time, rubbing her thumb and forefinger along the thin band and on the gem on top of it, “I’m excited. I’m…nervous and I don’t think I can understand how I’m feeling half of the time…I’m going to get married.”

“Which was something we always knew it’d happen.” Evelyn chuckles, “By the way, we are going to pick up Shells too,” Beatrice’s inquisitive ‘oh?’ makes Evelyn roll her eyes, “She said she’s bored, so.”

Beatrice chuckles, ‘That’s fine.” she smiles, leaning back on her seat, “I know she’ll love it.” 

And she did, especially once Shells found out what they were doing, almost tripping over herself by entering the back door, falling face first on the back seat and then fixing herself looking ready to pop a vein with how excited she was. Maybe more than Beatrice thought she’d be. 

When they got to Marcus’ studio, going up the same staircase as before, Beatrice couldn’t help but go up with a pep on her step all the way. Evelyn walked in first since she wanted to talk to Marcus before everyone, with Beatrice and Shells staying behind for a little while, her blonde friend peeking over a mannequin and then standing behind it, her head propped on the mannequin’s shoulder as she pulled on the sleeve playing as if she was wearing it herself. “What do you think? Is fuschia my color?’

Beatrice turned to look over to Shells, laughing quietly, “I think so, it’s a pretty color on you.”

‘Nice,do you think he’ll miss it if I take it?” 

“You know…I think there is a chance he’d miss it.” Beatrice replied with a grin, “But you can always ask him too.”

“Nah, you are his muse, I’m just the friend who tags along.”

Beatrice rolls her eyes, looking back to where Evelyn and Marcus were, the two looking at something on his Ipad for a while before Evelyn gestured to her two friends not too far away from where they were. Marcus’ lips broke into a smile, “My darling muse!’ he calls from where he was, handing the Ipad over to one of his assistants, his long strides arriving sooner to where Beatrice and Shells were, air kissing the two of them, “I believe congratulations are in order!”

“Yeah,” the brunette blushed while wiggling her ring finger, “Thank you, Marcus.”

“Not only for that, my darling but the new collection is an immense success. I was just telling Evelyn that having you as the face made women everywhere see they could be beautiful just like you are.” Beatrice is flattered, her cheeks warming more as he continued, “Not to mention the several other designers who wanted to hire you as their model, oh, so many! But I told them I’d have to talk to you.”

“Oh, I…”

“I also told them you weren’t a model, professionally speaking, and that you were comfortable with us because we are all friends.”

Beatrice was thankful for that response, because she had no idea if she’d be able to do the same thing with a designer she didn’t know. “Thank you Marcus.” she says sweetly, then clears her throat, “Oh, um, so Evelyn probably told you what I’m looking for right?” he nods, ‘So…do you know anyone?”

‘I do have a friend, Lola, but she works in L.A. I can give her a call and we can book a wonderful meeting with her and prepare something for you. You can bring your friends over and everything.” 

“Oh, Marcus that’s great, but…I do have…a budget and you know–”

“Darling, darling ,please,” he flaps his hand, “Do not worry about the budget, Lola is a good friend and she can help you however you need to. Worry about the money later.” it was easy for him to say, he wasn’t the one getting married and she didn’t want her aunt paying for her wedding dress either so there was a certain amount of money she could use. “Give me five minutes to give her a call and we’ll resolve it, yes?”

Beatrice just nods, watching him pull out his phone and walk away from them, leaving her,Shells and Evelyn on the very spot with the brunette wringing her hands together, “Do you know her? Lola?”

Evelyn shakes her head, “Never heard of her, but then again, bridal fashion isn’t my cup of tea.” she explains, crossing her arms over her chest. 

With Marcus gone, Beatrice had time to think. She still had to get her bridesmaids, she already had a good idea of who they’d be, but she’d like to talk to all of them if possible and as soon as she could. Shells and Evelyn were two of them, that was already decided, she just needed to talk to the rest. 

She also knew who’d be her maid of honor and she hoped no one else would be upset by her choice - hopefully not, it wasn’t a competition after all -  because there was a reason for that person to be chosen too.

Marcus comes back with a huge smile on his face, “Darling! Lola said she’ll open a private room for you on Saturday, early morning. You can bring a group of people if you want to.”

Beatrice gasped, her smile widening, “Oh,Marcus, thank you so much!” she rushes to the fashion designer, hugging his middle, “You have no idea how much that means to me!”

“Well, as my muse and someone I’ve grown as my friend, I think I understand how much.” he chuckles,putting his phone in his back pocket after hugging her back, patting her upper back then holding her shoulders, “You’ll be great.”

“Thank you.” he excuses himself when one of his many assistants call him, Beatrice turning to her friends with a huge smile, squealing happily, “Oh, my God, I can’t believe it, this is so–wow! You guys are coming!”

“Um, duh, yeah! I’d force myself into the party if I wasn’t.”

Evelyn just arched her brow at the blonde, but smiled, “Hate to say it, but I’d be upset if I wasn’t invited either.”

Beatrice inhaled deeply, her cheeks hurting from smiling so much, “I’d just need to invite the others too, it’ll be so much fun!” she laughs, “I hope everyone else can join.”

“You know,” Shells begins, leaning on the mannequin by casually tossing her arm over it’s shoulder, “I think people would stop everything to go bridal shopping.” the blonde smirks, looking back at the mannequin with the pretty blouse, “Hey, Ev, do you think fuchsia is my color? And that Marcus would miss this?”

[camillasgirl]

‘I could fill a book with my cooking disasters’ - My life in food by HRH The Duchess of Cornwall

I grew up in a very happy home, with good food at its heart. I still just about remember rationing, but we grew everything from tomatoes and melons to peas, beans, carrots and new potatoes. One of my earliest memories is podding those peas and beans with my mother, an accomplished cook.

We always had to finish what was on our plate before we ate pudding. That wasn’t such a problem when it was rice pudding as I hated the stuff.

At my first school, Dumbrells in Ditchling, East Sussex, the food was, surprisingly, excellent. Lots of steamed puddings and we were allowed to help the cook once a week in getting lunch ready. I still dream of their potato and cheese cake.

Every year, we went on holiday to the island of Ischia, just off Naples. There were endless lunches of vitello al limone [veal escalope with lemon], fried zucchini, lots of fresh fish and pasta. It instilled a lifelong passion for Italian food.

On Friday nights, at home, we were allowed to choose our dinner. I always went for Findus frozen chicken pie, much to my mother’s despair. Food at my grandmother’s house was more formal French, which was very much the smart thing in those days. What I remembered most there, though, was the brown bread ice cream.

When it came to restaurants, there wasn’t as much choice in 60s London as there is now. But at the time, we didn’t know any better. I always preferred the food at home anyway. But I remember how excited I was when I first ate prawn and avocado, at Alexander’s in Chelsea. The combination seemed impossibly exotic. I’d eaten avocados at home and hated them at first. But I now eat them most days. Daphne’s was another favourite, along with La Poule au Pot in Pimlico, which is still about. Best of all was The Causerie at Claridge’s, where there was a great round table with the most incredible buffet. Everyone dressed up and it seemed very glamorous.

I always cooked for the children growing up, and they were good eaters, but I was never the most adventurous of cooks. I was sent on a cooking course in Sussex when I was young but, really, I learnt from my mother. I’ve never followed a recipe in my life.

My cooking is about good ingredients. Nothing too mucked about, or fussy or fiddly. Lots of tarragon chicken, scrambled eggs and bacon, and chicken casserole. There were always roasts on Sunday – pork and lamb chops, roast chicken. The children ate a lot of cheese on toast. We had a kitchen garden and lots of chickens, for the eggs, so we ate seasonally before it became en vogue. Because that’s just what you did in the country back then. We used Love & Sons, the butchers, in Chippenham, Wiltshire. There was also a very good fishmonger but that’s long gone, which is sad. Britain has so much incredible produce, and our farmers do a magnificent job. We should always support them.

When Sainsbury’s opened in Chippenham at the start of the 80s, it was rather exciting. So much choice. We ate a lot of chicken kievs.

I could fill a book with all my cooking disasters. I’m not a natural baker, to say the least. As for baked potatoes… many a poor, incinerated specimen has been found in the bottom of the Aga, put in, then forgotten about.

I do still cook for myself when at home. Simple things like fish en papillote with butter and herbs. And vegetables from the garden: kale, purple sprouting broccoli, carrots, courgettes, and lots of peas and beans because they freeze so well. I love the vegetable garden, and summer in particular. I’m very proud of my white peaches. My husband is an excellent gardener, and we’re quite competitive about our fruit and vegetables.

These days, restaurants are a way to see my children. They pick the restaurants, I pay the bill. I don’t like too much noise but we tend to go to the same places.

One of my favourite foods is baked beans on toast. Always Heinz. And freshly cooked fish and chips, wrapped in paper. That smell. You cannot beat proper fish and chips.I can’t bear peppers, raw or cooked. I’m not a fan of offal either, aside from very good liver. And I avoid chilli and garlic too, unlike my son.My last supper would probably involve my own asparagus, with lots of butter. Angela Hartnett’s risotto. I love her cooking. Dover sole meunière, with ratte potatoes and fresh broad beans and peas from the garden. Some bitter chocolate ice cream. Plus strawberries and raspberries and lots of clotted cream. Along with a really good glass of red claret. And, seeing it’s my last supper, probably two.

[vintagegoddess12]

The Ever After (4)

Relationship: Agatha Harkness x Reader

Summary: Agatha is getting more thirsty for the reader. Billy hears something.

The 50s

The 60s

The 70s

The 80s

Agatha laid her confusion to rest when she realized Wanda just pressed rewind on the whole town.

As she’s sitting in the backseat of the Vision’s family car, she thought back to your glitch moment. It looks like the town is on the fritz when Wanda is under stress - more so if it’s labor. The witch did not know if she was relieved that your memory slipped just because of the anomaly, or scared that you would remember her. She decided it was the former.

The new parents decided to bring their kids to a Westview resort for a little rest and recreation. Wanda also reasoned that they should celebrate five years’ worth of birthdays. The kids did nothing but cheer and zoom around their house before their departure, a fact known by Agatha since she can hear them all the way down to her basement.

“Aunt Agnes,” the 5-year-old twins rushed to hug her when she met up with them on their front lawn. Kids are a lot better when they’re not touching her, she thought to herself.

“How are my cute, oh so cute, boys?” She pinches their cheeks which made them giggle. 

Billy continued clinging to her while his twin answered, “I’ve got my floaties, Auntie.” Tommy reached for his inflatable donut and presented it to her. She pretended to be surprised as if she has not seen those so many times. Not two minutes into the trip but she’s already losing energy to deal with them. How are they so energetic? They’re only 9 hours old!

“Are we ready to have some fun in the sun?” Wanda cheered as she approached their car. Agnes feigned excitement and joined the kids in squealing. 

Vision eagerly loaded their luggage in the car and asked everyone to hop in. They all ran and took their seats, the nosy neighbor sandwiched between the kids on the back seat.

---

Their vehicle came to a stop when they reached the resort near the edge of town. Bringing the whole family here is pretty bold for the young ingenue, Agatha thought to herself. She decided it’s not up to her to ensure their safety from the surrounding force field, she might even be the cause of its breakdown. 

As the group walked inside the hotel, the kids who are full of energy once again zoomed around the hallways. Vision ran after them as Wanda took their keys from reception. Agnes trailed after her friend, making snarky comments about, you guessed it, her husband.

“Ralph insisted on staying home,” she puffed her now-era-appropriate curly hair while leaning close to Wanda, “says he’s not in a good mood to be under the sun.” 

“Oh no,” the young witch said half-heartedly.

“One of these days, I’m going to poison him with garlic and kill the vampire man that I think he is,” she affirmed with a laugh. Agatha, of course, knows that the food condiment doesn’t really kill vampires. You do it with a stake to their heart, but Agnes is not supposed to know that. 

“Maybe he’s just planning a surprise for you,” Wanda thought of all the sweet gestures Vision had prepared for her and smiled to herself. Always the romantic.

“Oh honeybun, the only way he can surprise me is if he washes his own dishes over the weekend,” Agnes was about to laugh at her statement when her eyes landed on a breathtaking Westview resident. “Speaking of surprises, who do we have here?” She called to the incoming figure, who immediately caught the flirty inflection in her voice. 

“Wanda, Agnes,” you beamed at them, missing the way Agatha appreciated your view. 

She watched as you approached them in the reception area, sunglass in your eyes and a summer drink on hand. Her eyes traveled from your head to toe, not missing the magenta one-piece swimsuit peeking through your black lace coverup. It was modest enough for the time period but not enough skin for the Salem witch. 

“[Y/N], I didn’t know you were here?” Wanda wondered if she had somehow instructed her closest friends to come and follow her here. She’s still confused as to how everything works in her Westview. 

“I needed a break from the mourning atmosphere in my house,” your attention darting between the two housewives, “so I decided to get some sun you know.” You took a sip from your drink, eyes meeting Agatha’s.

“By the looks of it, you can definitely get it,” Agnes winked and continued to hold your gaze, smirking at the spit take you did with your drink. 

“Agnes, you’re so naughty,” Wanda remarked, still not used to the flirty and forward nature of her friend. It made her remember Natasha, who was also flirty but for mission purposes. Agnes, on the other hand, uses it for fun which was definitely refreshing. 

The young witch wondered what her life would be like if she had met Agnes and you before all of this. Would you have been friends the same way? Traces of fear crept into her mind when she realized the two of you would either be dead because of her or loathe her. She feels like she’s found her tribe here, just like she did with the Avengers, but that too ended the same way: losing the ones she loved and fighting with the ones she cared for. 

She shook the feeling and focused on what was in front of her: Vision running around with their kids, friends who get her and are always beside her, and a town where she belongs. 

---

Settling in her room, Agatha can’t help but feel excited for her weekend. She’s spending time to know Wanda’s powers and she can keep you safe beside her. It’s as if this town is working in her favor. Or maybe Wanda is just an excellent scriptwriter. 

The witch was putting on her swimsuit, careful not to wear anything out of this time period when a knock from the door took her out of her reverie. She tried to determine who the person was but somehow her magic can’t identify who it is. Taking one last look in the mirror, making sure she’s still the hottest witch in town, she opened the door. It definitely showed on her face how surprised she was to see the woman who’s been plaguing her dreams recently.

“Wanda said I’d find you here,” your face scrunched up with a smile. 

“I didn’t know you were aching to see me.” Agnes pouted cheekily which made you smile even more.

“I was just going to ask you a favor.” She stepped aside, letting you into her room. “I don’t think aching is the word I would have used.”

  After closing the door, she turned to you and asked, “And what would you use, baby?” Her voice was low and sounded like a challenge. You opened your mouth, thinking of a reply, but no words come out. You blame it on the heat on your cheeks when she called you ‘baby.’ 

Agatha surely did not miss the sudden redness

“Can you let me finish?” you ask in between giggles.

You noticed how Agnes’s eyes darken, solely looking at you. It’s like watching a predator set its sights on its prey. You two were stuck in a staring match, both unwilling to first let go, when she stepped forward pinning you against the door.

“That depends, sweetie.” Her closeness clouding all your senses, “will you beg for it?”

You remained still against the door, feeling the heat consuming your body and the stark contrast of the cold golden metal on your ring finger. You tried to gather your thoughts, clearing your throat. 

“I think we have very different ideas of what favor means,” you say as you try to remain upright. The lack of distance between you two makes you wanna fall directly into her arms. 

Agatha gave you a once over before replying, “I bet we do.” She grinned, placing a hand on your waist, seeing how unsteady you have become in the past minute.

“Okay,” you pushed Agnes lightly to regain space, “I just came to ask if you want to get a massage downstairs because they said couples can avail of it for a discounted price. Wanda and Vision are getting it and I was supposed to get it but Herb sort of bailed on me.” 

You were visibly catching your breath when you saw jealousy paint Agnes’ face. 

The Salem Witch felt a pang of pain run through her, especially with the idea of Herb wooing you. She wanted to claim her territory right there and then. She can just push you to the bed or have her way with you against this very door. Any way to remind you that only she can touch you best. She was taken out of her thoughts when you shook her body a little. 

“Did you hear me, Agnes?”

It was her turn to gather her thoughts, to remove the images of you deep in pleasure that only she can cause. 

“Yes,” Agnes smiled, trying to regain the upper hand in the conversation, “massage downstairs.” You nodded as she continued. “What about Herb?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him since…” you trailed off, trying to make sense of the gap in memory you’re just realizing. When did you last see the guy?

Agatha can see the confusion you’re currently wrestling with, no doubt caused by the unstable magic of the young redhead and her affinity for sitcoms. 

“So should we go downstairs and get this massage train going?” Your neighbor enthusiastically reeling you back in reality. She offered her hand and you accepted. You both strut down the hallway, all care thrown into the wind.

You also passed by the twins' room, where Billy is in distress about the voices he keeps on hearing. They all scream one thing: he’s coming.

[trivialbob]

Currently it is 60°F outside.

This is my favorite temperature. Except for coffee, lasagna, or ice cream. Most tasks go well with 60°. Sleeping with windows open. Mowing the lawn. Riding a bicycle, scooter, or motorcycle. Taking the dogs to the park. I’d rather sit on a restaurant patio at 60° instead of 85°.

It’s OK for shorts or jeans. When it’s cloudy, a long-sleeve shirt might be comfortable. But if you get warm you can take that off and tie it around your waist.

Today’s high temperature will be around 80°. Usually the house remains cool enough throughout the day so air conditioning isn’t needed. Sometimes Sheila’s upstairs office gets a bit warm if there’s no breeze, so A/C might be necessary for part of the day. My office is on the first floor and stays cooler.

Tomorrow we have plans with neighbors for a pontoon boat ride. There will be eight of us. The boat owners are the brother and SIL of a former neighbors. Those folks moved to North Dakota a few years ago, but we’ve remained in close contact. They are coming to town this weekend. I like how we’ve become friends with the wife’s relatives. Sheila and I have even visited her parents in South Dakota.

Sadly, I see some storms in tomorrow’s weather forecast. 50% chance, it says. Fingers cross we get the other 50%.

We have four dogs today. My BIL’s Aussie stayed overnight. Stella and Sulley, being puppies, have their own food. I’ve found a routine where I get them each their own bowl of puppy food. They don’t steal from each other.

Ella and Oliver think puppy food is a huge treat. The older Aussies get jealous of the puppies. So I take a small amount of the kibble and put it in another room (in separate corners) for the two older dogs. When everyone is done they all check out where the others had been eating, looking for a piece that may have been missed. So far none of them have every found even one morsel of puppy food that was overlooked by another dog.

[goblinbongwater]

I posted 53,839 times in 2022

That's 5,467 more posts than 2021!

366 posts created (1%)

53,473 posts reblogged (99%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@bunnygirlskull

@bonersquat

@ressing

@dragongirltongue

@unyanizedcatboys

I tagged 2,328 of my posts in 2022

#loud - 846 posts

#pulsing lights - 805 posts

#long post - 96 posts

#elden ring spoilers - 33 posts

#artistic nudity - 23 posts

#unreality - 15 posts

#ai generated - 14 posts

#death cw - 13 posts

#me - 13 posts

#gender - 12 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#not simplified like what was said above like the hiring test post where it said youre supposed to 'welcome' the guests and not 'greet' them

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Good news everyone, PayPal decided I have a $60 debt cause a reprocessed payment or some shit :)))))))

38 notes - Posted November 9, 2022

#4

Don't normally make psas but this ad is an major epilepsy hazard as it features an unrelated clip of a police crusier outside someone's house with rapidly flashing siren lights

73 notes - Posted August 6, 2022

#3

Y'all motherfuckers better commission my wife so ey can eat food

80 notes - Posted June 8, 2022

#2

Anyone need a small writing comm'd? I want to have a bit more dosh aside from my job,

.05¢ per word sfw or nsfw, examples can be provided

122 notes - Posted September 19, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

He got that gushers type booba

717 notes - Posted January 27, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[piratewithvigor]

My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool 

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously. 

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged. 

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

[emmy-writes-sometimes]

Be My Baby

Summary: You finally have ‘the talk’ with Henry. 

Pairing: Henry Cavill x female reader

Warnings: Age gap, alcohol consumption, extreme fluff

You were more nervous that night than you had ever been in your life. You were finally having the talk with Henry. Or you thought you were going to. The boyfriend/girlfriend, what are we, where do you think we’re going talk. You had planned to go to a brewery that he liked and he’d wanted to show you, which seemed tame enough, and then it would probably end like always - a kiss at the door that would always turn into just a little bit more, no matter how tired he said he was.

“Okay, how do I look? Girlfriend material?” You asked your roommate as you put your earrings in, satisfied with your outfit after literal hours of trying to choose. Henry was just so, Henry - always put together, no matter how long he’d spent on set or how early he’d had to get up. That was one thing that you loved about him. He was honest about being exhausted, but he was always willing to go on whatever adventure you asked him to.

“Definitely,” your roommate giggled. You fixed your hair again until you heard your phone chime and Henry’s text said he was waiting outside. You quickly made your way down to the street and across it, seeing him flash his lights. His window rolled down and he smiled at you. The butterflies in your stomach fluttered for the first time since the last time he’d seen you.

“You look fantastic,” he said as you got in the car. You felt your skin get hot, hoping he wouldn’t be able to tell, as you shut the door back. He turned to you and gave you a single sweet kiss, one that only broke as he smiled.

“So do you,” you said. “How was set?”

“I almost died only once,” he replied, holding his hand out. His knuckles were bandaged up, probably from getting cut by a sword.

“Oh my God, Henry!”

“It’s really nothing. The adrenaline just got me and I didn’t hear the c-word, so I didn’t stop.” He laughed at himself, shaking his head. You took his hand and rubbed your thumb over his knuckle, feeling the way he relaxed into your hold.

“Your hands are freezing, too, why don’t you turn your heat on?”

“Because I don’t want to have to charge my car.” You rolled your eyes, but giggled. 

“First world problems, Henry. A week ago I wasn’t even sure I could pay for noodles.” That made him laugh, too. You knew he was obscenely rich from his movies and the show he was doing, but it was more of a funny joke between the two of you than anything that he was the rich guy and you were the poor, just out of university student. You’d met at a friend’s wedding a month and a half ago and he’d asked you out right then and there. You just... worked together, even though you weren’t really together. There were a few years between you, yes, and that had worried you at first. And you’d found out from walking in on your roommate watching the Witcher that Henry was an actor - he’d mentioned athletics and his brothers being in the military, so through your first date you assumed he’d done something like that. You didn’t have too much in common, but you found each other’s lives fascinating. 

“You should’ve come to my house, I have so much food for one person and I need to stop eating it all.” You took his hand as he drove, your conversation quieting as you listened to the bad 80′s rock that Henry was listening to over the radio. You arrived in just a few minutes and got your drinks, finding a place to sit down. Your dates in the past had always sat across from you, but Henry always wanted to sit beside you. So you took a seat together on one of the couches facing a fire pit and drank, just catching up and talking. You didn’t get to see each other very much during the week except the occasional FaceTime call while he was bored in wardrobe and you weren’t doing anything at work. 

The brewery played all 60′s music for some reason, and you weren’t mad. You listened to it a little as you drank, tuning out as Henry relayed one of the fight scenes out to you. You melted into pure giggles and curled slightly into his body when you realized that it was getting colder outside and your pumpkin beer was dwindling. The night was actually somewhat quiet - the fire in front of you burned and the air was slightly chilly and you knew that when you would arrive home that night you would be in a fog. 

“I’ve been meaning to ask,” Henry started as he put his beer down on the little table in front of you, leaning back to then put his arm around your shoulder again. 

“Hm?” You sat up a little bit, looking at him. One of his curls had fallen out and was astray on his forehead, and you squeezed your thumb into your fist to avoid pushing it up and possibly making things awkward. 

“I like you a lot. A lot.” You grinned.

“I like you too, Henry.” He smiled at you saying his name. That was always a trigger for him - he always, always smiled when you said his name. 

“And I know things are kind of complicated because of my job, and yours, but I kind of... don’t really care.” You giggled. 

“Don’t care?” You asked, lifting your eyebrows.

“I mean, I don’t care about how complicated it is. I like you and I want to keep doing this. And it sounds incredibly juvenile coming out of my mouth while Be My Baby is playing, but will you be my girlfriend?” 

“Of course, Cavill,” you matched the beam on his face, but you couldn’t quite match the dimples on his cheeks and you couldn’t understand how you got this far with someone so... him. He pressed a kiss to your forehead and let it go, allowing you to put your head on his shoulder. 

“You’re okay with, everything, I guess, right? The photos and the...” 

“It’ll be weird. But it’s worth you.” He took a pause. 

“No one’s ever said that before,” he said as his smile faded. “Everyone’s always put up with it, but nobody’s... said it’s worth it.” 

“I would do whatever running challenge you’re constantly talking about if it meant spending time with you, and you know how much I hate running.” His lips turned into a smile again and he put his hand on your thigh, squeezing it. 

“You do hate running. But I promise, you could really benefit if you just, once a week...” Your conversation turned to other things but you were still reeling from his question, your insides feeling as if a rainbow had sprouted from your toes. 

The brewery eventually closed, but you didn’t want to say goodbye. Neither did he. And you mentioned that you didn’t have to be anywhere the next day, so you went back to his house. You’d been there before, and you’d met his dog before, but it seemed a little different. A little more homey now that you knew that you were truly welcome there. 

You took up his offer to borrow a shirt so you could change out of your nicer clothes, and in a few minutes the two of you were curled up on the couch. One of his hands was on you, the other on Kal’s head, as you watched some old movie he’d picked out. You didn’t care what it was, you were just eager to be in his arms. 

“You’re gonna fall asleep,” he chuckled as you made yourself comfortable.

“I know. Wake me up when the movie’s over.” He let out a huff and put both of his arms around you, allowing you to fall asleep anyway. He eventually shook you awake. 

“I didn’t mean to actually fall asleep.” 

“I know. Let’s get you home.” You both sat up and you grabbed your clothes, too tired to really care that you were wearing your own bottoms but his top still, and went back out to his car. He turned the heat on high, toward you, and once again his hand made its way into yours. 

“Be safe driving back,” you said as you started to get out of his car. He leaned toward you and kissed you, slowly but sweetly, and broke into a smile again. 

“If you’re free tomorrow, you know where to come.” You smiled.

“Oh, you know I will.” You got out and walked into your apartment, trying not to wake your roommate up. The next morning, you awoke with a text from Henry - Hope you slept well! Now give me my shirt back 😉

A/N: I know this is short, but I had the idea and wanted to get it up!

Taglist: I’m starting over with my taglist, so if you’d like to be added send me an ask and I will add you! 

[te-quiero-verde]

This is too long to send as an ask, so I could send it as a message but it wouldn't be right if I didn't show off our friendship to everyone else on tumblr, would it? So I'm posting it instead xD

Here you go bestie: 80 things I love about you 💖

1) you make me insanely happy

2) talking to you makes me smile (every single time)

3) you're one of the sweetest humans ever

4) you're so funny!!!

5) you use a lot of emojis/exclamation marks when you're texting (and that reassures me because I do too)

6) I can always rely on you to freak out with me

7) you're so thoughtful

8) you're also very smart

9) you often get my friends references!!! And not many people do so I love you so much for that

10) you're beautiful

11) you're positive and enthusiastic

12) you always comment on my fics 🥺

13) YOU HUG ME CONSTANTLY

14) seriously you're such a lovely person

15) I feel like I've been missing you all my life

16) our conversations are the cutest

17) I love whenever you begin a text with 'story time'

18) you put up with me calling you franziska

19) you get annoyed when I call you franziska xD

20) you're an amazing writer

21) you're an incredible baker (who cares if I've never tried any of your food! I JUST KNOW)

22) you're the best sister in the world

23) you're a little bit crazy too

24) you're a good listener

25) you have a great taste in music

26) and TV shows

27) and movies

28) you make my day basically every single day

29) you're the only person in the world who makes me want to hug them literally ALL THE TIME

30) did I mention how gorgeous you are

31) I love how devoted you are to language learning

32) and your English is pretty much perfect (which I'm very grateful for)

33) BABY FRANZI

34) AND FRANZI AND DARIO AAAHHH

35) your accent (you had to know this was coming at some point xD)

36) your VOICE (I know you were expecting this too)

37) your hair

38) you help me annoy my brother by making him jealous of you 😈

39) you're basically a celebrity in our house now because I talk about you so much

40) you make me check my phone to see if you've messaged me at the most inconvenient times!! (in restaurants, when I'm about to go in the sea, on top of mountains... 😝)

41) your smileeeeee

42) your love for animals

43) your sense of humour

44) just your whole personality in general

45) you're just so nice all the time 😭

46) you're ALWAYS right

47) and you ALWAYS make irritatingly good points

48) you make me laugh every day

49) and you make me grin uncontrollably

50) you're a significant cause of my overuse of heart emojis

51) there aren't many people as kind and fun to be around as you

52) I trust you

53) you're such a good friend!

54) you're the kind of friend that you really hope you stay friends with all your life

55) we're like joey and chandler (and wynonna and waverly but I'll have to wait until you've seen wynonna earp for you to understand that)

56) I'm HONOURED to have met you

57) I feel so close to you even though we've never met

58) you always know exactly what to say

59) your enthusiasm when I'm writing my fics 🥰

60) your OBSESSION with Harry Potter

61) I was friends with Harry-Potter-obsessed people for ages and they couldn't convince me to read it no matter how hard they tried, and now here we are

62) I don't think you give yourself nearly enough credit for how awesome you are (but you SHOULD)

63) and I don't think you understand how lucky everyone is who has ever met you

64) your dancing skills are... *chef's kiss*

65) and YOUR SINGING 😍😍😍

66) you know when you're reading a really cute fluffy fic and you have to stop for a second because it's TOO ADORABLE AND YOU JUST CAN'T?? Well I often have to do that when I'm talking to you because I just 😭 love you SO MUCH that sometimes my heart can't take it

67) you make my life happier

68) since I wrote the thing about you basically being a celebrity in our house, it's now got to the point where my parents ask how's franzi every time I'm on my phone 😂

69) ((hehe)) BLESS THE UNIVERSE FOR CREATING YOU

70) there are very few people like you

71) I'm gonna tell you you're beautiful again (and I will keep on telling you until one day you believe me 😉 and then I'll keep telling you after that anyway)

72) you're more fun to talk to than most people

73) okay, I almost started crying when I was writing this TWICE because I was overwhelmed by how grateful I am to know you, but it's fine 😭 it's under control now

74) I text you more than I text all my irl friends put together and that's probably not a good thing but ohhh welllll nevermindddd it's fineeee

75) everyone who's never met you or talked to you is missing out in life and I FEEL SO BAD FOR THEM (you might think I'm exaggerating but NO IT'S TRUE!!! Imagine living life without EVER talking to franziska... How do people do it??!!)

76) a few months ago I had an online friend who I vowed was the best online friend I've ever had and will ever have, and then you came along and ruined that, so thank you 🙄🤗❤️ I really hate breaking promises, FRANZISKA

77) if you think I say nice things to you all the time, you have no idea how many nice things I think about you but don't tell you

78) I keep imagining what it would be like to meet you in real life

79) I'm thinking I'll just end up hugging you for like an hour 🙈 or more..... okay definitely more..... people would just stare at us and wonder what's wrong with us... it would be amazing

80) I love how easy it was to make this list xD (I'm probably gonna keep adding to it so consider this part one)

However, this list doesn't even begin to cover how amazing you are. Your brilliant FEEBLE mind cannot comprehend how much I love you 🥰 but I hope this makes you happy sorella maggiore