#so apparently she has a crush on a banana girl. how cute

[evanostic]

so i played regretevator a few days ago and idk the lore but i would kill and die for bive

[sadhours]

Steve fucks you in his scoops ahoy costume please and thanks <3

heheheh gigi u know me so well... please request a part 2

PART TWO

cw: 18+ minors dni, smut, dry humping

he just looks so good in the uniform. you've been working across from scoops ahoy! for an entire month. you’re not sure how much longer you can handle this. it’s actually annoying. as he sweeps up the lobby, your eyes are drawn to his ass. they look incredible in those dumb little shorts. his knee high socks sinking lower as the day wears on. potentially worse, he matches his shoes to the uniform. same shade of blue adidas and it’s cute. your coworkers all tease you for your crush on Harrington. they even tell you he’s desperate right now; hitting on every girl that walks into the ice cream store. perfect time to shoot your shot.

but you’re shy as can be. there’s no way in hell steve harrington will hit on you if you walk into scoops ahoy!, especially not in your silly pizzeria uniform. so you just keep on watching him from afar.

the worst thing ever happens, though. a night where you have to close alone and apparently, so does steve. as you’re both awkwardly walking to the doors, he talks to you and boy, what a task it is to hold in your excitement.

“this mall is slowly draining me of my will to live,” he comments, grimacing as you make eye contact.

“ha,” it’s a fake laugh, why you’re fake laughing at him you don’t know but it’s what comes out, “yeah, me too.”

“see ya,” he says and it’s even more awkward when you notice his Beamer is parked right next to your car.

��bye,” you lamely reply as you continue walking next to him. steve chuckles as he keeps walking.

—

your coworkers convinced you to walk across the food court to offer robin and steve a trade. a couple of ice creams for a small pizza and some fries. and you’re relieved when robin’s manning the counter. but she purses her lips and calls for steve, he opens the back window and looks at you.

“yeah?” he asks, hair flopping down on his forehead and he’s so fucking adorable, you have to hold back the giggle forming in your throat.

“they wanna trade ice cream for pizza,” robin tells him, looks like she’s not entirely convinced.

steve’s eyes light up and his lips curl into a smile, “oh, i’m starving, yes!”

robin rolls her eyes, “didn’t you just eat like five bananas?”

“six,” he furrows his brows, “and i’m a growing boy, leave me alone.”

steve looks to you then, “yes, deal.”

he closes the window and comes from the back door, “what do you guys want?”

you read off the note your coworkers wrote and wait for the pair of them to fill it.

—

as you’re leaving, you walk over to scoops so you can tell them thank you but steve is alone. he’s counting the drawer but he’s left the gate open. so you walk inside, feeling bold. you stand in front of the counter and smile at him, waiting for him to finish counting pennies. once he is, he looks up at you and smiles.

“hi,” he purrs and the tone of his voice makes you shiver and you have to squeeze your thighs together.

“i just wanted to say thanks for trading, earlier.”

“no problem,” he pushes his hair back, “that pizza was awesome, thank you.”

“of course,” you flush, knowing you made it with love just for steve. “robin leave already?”

“yeah, she bikes home so i usually let her leave early,” he shrugs, “you close alone?”

“no, but we were slow, so it was quick getting out of there,” you reply, feeling bold so you ask, “do you need any help?”

“for free? no, don’t worry about it,” he grins and you love his smile so much. you don’t wanna leave.

“no, really, i don’t mind,” you say, “i can do some grunt work to make your close easier.”

steve chuckles and nods, “if you insist,” he offers you a rag, “you can wipe down tables.”

you take it with a smile and nod, turning on your heels and making quick with wiping down the tables. you’re focused on a stubborn stain on a table when you feel steve behind you. before you can turn he places a hand on your hip and gets his lips close to your ear, “am i outta line or is there something here?”

you melt, gripping the table so you don’t turn into a puddle. a loss for words, you just gasp and tilt your head back.

“am i outta line?” steve repeats, determined on a reply.

“no,” you insist, shaking your head and steve snakes his arm around your waist, pulls your back flush against his front and smiles against your ear.

“oh, thank god,” he purrs, then kisses your neck, “hoped i wasn’t going crazy.”

“how did you know?” you ask, releasing your grip on the table as you turn towards him.

steve’s face is flushed, like he was nervous and it makes you feel special. he looks incredibly handsome and you grip onto his biceps as you gaze into his beautiful brown eyes.

“the way you look at me,” he mumbles back, eyes darting from your lips to your eyes.

“how do i look at you?” you ask in the short distance between your faces.

steve’s lips quirk up as he replies, “like you didn’t want ice cream, like you wanted me.”

you flush all shades of red, embarrassed you couldn’t hide your crush. it seems to be a good thing so you tell him, “i do— want you.”

steve closes the gap between you, pressing your ass against the table as he kisses you heatedly. his hands grip your hips as he sucks your top lip between his. you have to wrap your arms around his neck so you don’t fall down to the floor, feeling wonderfully lightheaded as steve kisses you stupid. he lifts you up and rests you on the table, moving his hand to grope your breast through the dress you have to wear for work. you hook your ankles around the back of his calves as you kiss him back with just as much fervor as he’s giving you.

it’s unbelievable, kissing steve like this in the lobby of scoops ahoy! there’s no way your coworkers are gonna believe you. steve doesn’t kiss with a lot of tongue, just little teases of it dragging against your lower lip before he kisses your top lip bruisingly. he grabs your face while he does it. you whine against him, knotting your fingers in his luscious locks. they’re so soft, you get lost in them. moaning softly into the kiss as you gently tug on the tendrils on the back of his neck and steve groans against you.

“you keep doing that, we’re gonna have to do more than kissing,” he mumbles against your lips.

god… you’d let steve take your virginity right here on this table but something tells you that you have to relay that information, “i-i’m a virgin.” you tell him in a whisper and he groans as he rolls his hips against you.

“i can’t take your virginity here,” he laughs softly, “but we can do something else…”

the promise of him taking your virginity is overwhelming and excited. you’d been fantasizing about it for months. you look at him expectantly as he pulls away, you glance down to see him straining in his scoops ahoy! uniform and you giggle.

“c’mere,” he helps you off the table and onto the booth. “lay down.”

you obey and bite your lip, anticipating Steve’s next move. he situates his body on top of yours in the booth, suddenly you can feel his erection against your thigh and he wiggles until you can feel it against your core. you gasp and he kisses you hard, grabbing the hem of your dress and hiking it up over your waist. steve then licks into your mouth and you moan, wrapping your legs around his waist as he grinds down against you. it’s so… wonderful, his clothed hard on rubbing against your core through your underwear. you feel it all over, soaking through your panties and probably his shorts. steve pants through the kissing, rutting his hips against yours in a way that makes your head swim. the drag of his erection against your clit is something fucking special and it makes you jerk up against him, wanting more.

steve keeps kissing you, grinding down against you even faster. tingles run up your thighs straight to your core and you can’t help but release these begging little whines against his lips. steve bites your lip then, tugging it between his teeth as his hands make quick work to pull the top of your dress down, exposing your breasts, his hand grabs hold of your tit and squeezes as he continues winding his crotch down against yours. once his fingertips you with your nipple, you let out a loud, guttural moan and steve is swallowing it down with a sloppy kiss. you find your hands in his hair again, pulling and tugging as he whimpers into the kiss and works his hips even harder.

the pair of you are writhing against each other desperately, panting and moaning against tongues and lips and that coil that’s been winding in your stomach snaps. blissful release soaring through you with a cry of Steve’s name as he pinches your nipple.

“that’s it,” he purrs against your slack jawed mouth, “cum for me, baby. that’s a good girl.”

you cling onto him desperately and steve’s hips stutter before stopping and he makes a pretty whimper and whine against your lips.

once he pulls away, his shorts are very clearly ruined and your embarrassed but also incredibly turned on by the evidence of a good time.

“when can we do more?” you ask, blinking hopefully at him.

steve laughs softly and scratches the back of his neck, “well… my house is empty… if you wanna come over?”

“yes, I would love to,” you giggle as you sit up.

[wonderlustlucas]

jack pot ; part 1 - hwang hyunjin

⇢ prompt You know it’s bad when you’re high as a kite and he’s still on your mind. ⇢ pairing hwang hyunjin x female reader, seo changbin x female reader for like 2 minutes ⇢ word count 7.5k ⇢ genre fluff, angst (not heavy, just in a slow burn kind of way), slight smut ⇢ warnings drug use!!! & lots of it (marijuana), grinding, implied smut ⇢ summary College is a matter of working hard and playing hard. It’s an opportunity to start fresh, to grow as an individual and to blossom with those you befriend. People come and people go, leaving their mark on your life and showing you all the parts of becoming an adult. Some, however, do more than leave their mark. Some take just as much as they give. Things become complicated once they take the entirety of your love because you outright offered it to them.—college!au ; stoner!au ; friends to lovers!au ⇢ a/n yo!!! disclaimer: this initially was going to just be a long one shot but i decided to split it up into 3 parts, so just to let u all know part 1 & 2 does not have a ton of hyunjin interaction, they’re more character/plot building. part 3 is when things will get spicy ♥︎ i hope u enjoy! if u rb make sure to let me know what u thought in the tags mwah also i finally switched from ___ to yn are u guys proud of me :)

prelude.

Sometimes you really, truly, honestly think you could go right ahead and kill Han Jisung.

You say it all the time. Sometimes it’s a simple, “I will literally kill you,” or when you are feeling extra spicy, “Sleep with one eye open tonight.” He, of course, laughs it off like you aren’t vibrating with the urge to kick his kneecaps in. You seriously have lost count of all the times he has brought you to the brink of insanity.

And honestly, you have watched enough murder documentaries on Netflix that you probably could do it, but, you know, spending the rest of your life in prison does not sound that appealing. Plus, there’s the ever-troubling detail that Han Jisung is the closest thing you have to a best friend. So, it sort of goes against your basic human morals to backstab—literally—the most important human in your life.

But he really makes you crazy. Why you agreed to share an apartment with him in the first place is a mystery, but the fact that you leased it again for junior year is what really makes you lose sleep at night. Because, while he may be your best friend, Jisung is the epitome of a little shit. If such a compound word was in the dictionary, it simply would say ‘Han Jisung.’ Somehow, though, it makes you love him even more. Maybe it’s true that ‘opposites attract,’ or, perhaps, maybe it’s because no matter how much embarrassment and general self-loathing he may have caused you in the past, it has benefitted you in the end.

For example, his constant teasing about your lack of friends eventually led to you befriending a group of girls you always admired from afar. His snarky comments concerning your nonexistent social life finally got to you and now you can proudly wear the title of one of the best beer pong players in your class. His presence in general has taught you to stand up for yourself and what you believe in, whether it’s against him, your parents, a toxic friend, hell, even a professor. Proving people wrong, especially Jisung, is your favorite pastime.

Sometimes, though, it’s not that easy.

There’s one area in your life where you have accepted defeat. One area in your life where Jisung has his most fun. One area, or, perhaps one person, where you simply cannot step beyond your comfort zone.

Hwang Hyunjin is your Achilles tendon and Jisung is the arrow. There are times, along with all the times you’ve considered strangling Jisung in his sleep, where you have sat and actually prayed to the gods to send someone else. Someone not nearly as perfect as Hyunjin and someone not nearly as unattainable. Alas, these prayers, hook-ups, Tinder dates, anything to get him off your mind has proved futile; because here you are three years later, stuck with this stupid, absolutely infuriating crush on the only boy who has ever owned your heart because you outright gave it to him.

one.

You are beginning to think the two bubbly junior girls who led the campus tour you attended last year lied about the dining hall.

Correction: they one hundred percent lied.

Because even though the newly renovated food court looks nice—unscratched linoleum floors, shiny marble countertops and all sorts of seating to choose from—there must be something fishy going on with the cooks. Literally. Just last week, an upperclassman had a breakdown when she forked into her tuna (why anyone would want college seafood is another story) to find a worm right there in the middle of it. You have found little shards of glass in the yogurt and bugs even at You-Cook, but that’s all a part of the college experience, right?

“Are you sure there’s no spiders or anything? Did you check?” Beside you, Maddie watches with furrowed brows as you spoon a hefty serving of scrambled eggs onto your plate. Chuckling, you move down to grab a few sausages and a chocolate chip muffin before they are gone for the rest of the day; Lord knows, you are only a month in and carbohydrates have quickly become your emotional support, just like everyone else. “Yes, I checked,” you assure her, hiding a laugh with your hand as she leans over to further scrutinize the eggs, “I didn’t see any arachnids.”

“Good,” she hums, satisfied with your answer, “can you grab a banana muffin for me? They’re usually at the bottom.”

Nodding, you turn back to the blessed muffin basket, pushing away blueberry, corn, double chocolate, all because Maddie has to be different and go for the macadamia nut banana.

“Are those the dinosaur socks they were selling on move-in day?” In front of you, someone asks, and your first instinct is to look down at your feet just to confirm. 8:30 calculus simply turns your brain to mush and remembering how you dressed for the day is near impossible. “Yes!” Laughing, you lift your leg to get a closer look at the cute green t-rexes on skates. “I was sold once I heard they were a dollar.”

Tearing your gaze away from said socks, you look up and suddenly feel as if you have bumped into an angel. Maybe there were spiders in the eggs, deadly poisonous spiders that crawled up the spoon while you weren’t paying attention and bit your hand and now you are dead and this is the angel leading you to the heavens. That, or this simply is the most beautiful human you have ever seen up close and your brain does not know how to process it. Well, maybe that’s a little extreme, but you definitely have never been so starstruck in your life.

The boy in front of you says something but you don’t hear it, senses and thoughts momentarily Off™ as you gawk at him. Aside from the deep undereye bags you all have claimed the past few weeks, this stranger is as close to perfect as you can get. Sure, Seungmin and his roommates are pretty cute—but what the fuck?

Something tells you that you have been silently staring at him, wide-eyed and mouth hanging open for far too long when his brows raise in a mix of confusion and expectation. Shit. What did he say? Synapses suddenly shooting like fireworks in your brain, you desperately try to remember his reply but instead, all you had focused on was the plumpness of his lips as he spoke and not the words themselves.

Clearing your throat, you blink once, twice, hoping you were hallucinating the whole time and the boy in front of you is not Hercules incarnate.

Lucky for you or him, you can’t tell, but he is still as attractive as he was two seconds ago. “Sorry, what?” You blurt, loud, too loud, flinching at the sound of your own voice. Instead of recognizing that you are totally off your rocker, he smiles, a soft, toothy smile that has your muscles turning to goo.

“I said I bought them, too,” cutest-boy-in-the-universe repeats, looking down and you follow his gaze, “my roommates were making fun of me, so I’m glad I finally found someone who bought them.” Alas, as he tugs at the fabric of his jeans to slightly lift the cuff you see that he, too, wears the same socks. You think you’re in love.

“Well, your roommates clearly have no taste,” you deadpan, shakily meeting his eyes once he looks back up. He laughs softly, eyes scrunching at the action and you positively swoon until silence settles over you and he takes the opportunity to regard you, gaze sweeping down your frame and up again. You hold your breath because, 1) holy shit, you would get on your knees for him right now and 2) you suddenly wish you were wearing more than the ‘just-woke-up-to-get-pegged-by-calc’ fit.

“I’m Hyunjin,” he finally says and you release all the air trapped in your lungs. “YN,” you return, grasping his outreached hand and thanking the heavens it is as sweaty as yours. “Well, it was nice to meet you, YN,” Hyunjin proceeds, releasing your hand and offering a gentle smile.

“You too, Mr. Sock Man,” you grin, rocking on your heels and realizing with a pang of disappointment that your breakfast has probably gone cold. Well, that’s okay, because right now you are totally content standing here in the middle of the dining hall, silently staring at this Hyunjin with a stupid smile plastered on your face. And the best part? He apparently is just fine doing that, too.

“YN!” Somewhere behind you, Maddie calls your name and it thrusts you head-first back into reality. “Did you find a banana muffin? I can’t find— oh. Who’s this?” Appearing beside you, visibly shocked having found you in a staring contest with a very tall, very cute boy. “Oh, uh,” you huff out a laugh, scrambling to get yourself together, “Hyunjin, this is Maddie, my roommate. Maddie, this is Hyunjin. We have the same socks.”

Brows shooting up at the puzzling introduction, Maddie bites back a laugh and looks back and forth between you and Hyunjin. “Well, you don’t hear that every day,” smiling to hide her confusion, she offers him a small wave with her hand full of muffin packs, “nice to meet you.”

Hyunjin smiles in return, gaze quickly returning to you. “I’ll be off, then. Gotta get the waffles while they’re still warm. I’ll see you around.”

And before you know it, he’s off toward the other end of the breakfast counter.

“Um, what the fuck?” Maddie whispers excitedly as you make your way toward your usual table, elbow repeatedly jabbing into your side. “I have no idea what just happened. I think I’m dreaming,” you sigh blissfully, relieved to find that Jisung and Seungmin were able to claim your favorite booth. “No, definitely not dreaming. He’s totally into you. You have to hang out.”

“What?” You sputter, nearly tripping over your own two feet. Then, lowering your voice as you near the two boys, “I – no, he isn’t. How can you tell? That was like, the cutest guy I’ve ever talked to, and you think he’s into me?”

“Who’s the cutest guy ever?” Jisung pipes up, eyes lighting up and you curse him and his fucking bat hearing.

“No one,” you grumble, smiling softly at Seungmin when he gets up so you don’t have to sit on the end, leaving Maddie to sit next to the other one. “Is it me?” Jisung grins with a flutter of his eyelashes. He’s convinced the only reason you dislike him is because you’ve actually fallen in love with him, but that’s far from the truth. You don’t even dislike him—he’s just one of the first guys you’ve met who meets your sarcasm with as much ferocity, and that is a hard pill to swallow.

“In your dreams, Han,” you sneer, gracing him with a dramatic eye roll before tearing open the bag of your muffin. Comfortable conversation quickly falls into place as you eat, complaints about your classes, Seungmin trying to convince you to join them at the first party they will be attending while Jisung mocks you for wanting to stay home, Maddie asking where Felix is and Seungmin explaining that he got so high last night he ended up staying up past four playing Overwatch and is currently sleeping past all his classes.

Then, in the midst of guzzling your apple juice, Jisung leans out of his seat to call down the aisle. “Hwang! Come pull a chair over!”

Curiosity peaked, you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand and crane your neck to see over Seungmin’s fat head for who this ‘Hwang’ could be until, like the universe is really trying to kill you, the Hyunjin you met not even ten minutes ago has reached your table. “Hey,” he grins brightly, dabbing up the two boys before he glances to you, mouth promptly falling open. Certain you mirror the same expression, you struggle to find your words as Jisung and Seungmin look between you in shared confusion. “First we share socks, now it’s these dumpheads?”

Ignoring the way they scowl, Hyunjin giggles shamelessly and grabs a chair from an adjacent table to sit at the head of your booth. “It would seem that way.”

“Woah, woah, woah. Slow down. You guys know each other?” Jisung scoffs in disbelief, pointedly looking at you as if you’ve gone and disproved everything he pegged of you. “We just met,” Hyunjin replies with a shy smile, sparing you a quick glance before cutting into his waffle. Jisung looks to you and you offer an affirmative nod.

“And how are you guys friends?” Maddie asks, sensing your panic. “He’s Changbin and Minho’s roommate,” Seungmin answers.

You choke on a mouthful of juice.

“Christ, you good?” Seungmin snickers, offering a few slaps to your back. With a muffled yes, you look to Hyunjin with pleading eyes. “Please don’t tell them I said they have no taste.”

He laughs, arching a brow at you. “No way. They’ll get a kick out of that.”

“Oh, Christ,” faking a cry, you bury your face into your palms, “so much for making friends.”

“It’s okay, YN,” Jisung soothes with faux sympathy, “no one wants to be your friend anyway.”

Scoffing, the table quickly falls silent when you look up with rage in your eyes. “I bet when someone asks your parents about you, they change the subject,” you spit, shooting daggers at him before stabbing your fork into an innocent chunk of egg. To your utmost surprise but total delight, the other three burst into a fit of laughter, leaving you smirking smugly and Jisung sulking.

“Anyway,” Maddie promptly changes the subject back to her chemistry professor who has started every class playing Britney Spears. Tucked away in your corner finishing the last of your sausage and stifling the urge to get up for more, it isn’t until Hyunjin begins to speak do you realize that you have been quietly watching him the entire time. You would blame the soft morning sunshine shining through the windows and illuminating the right side of his face for making him look so ethereal, but you know that isn’t the case; from short, messy black hair, silver hoop earrings, thick, defined brows, the soft curves of his nose and the pouty fullness of his lips, you are totally, completely mesmerized.

And then, the sole of a sneaker is slammed right into your shin. “OW!” You yelp, loud, and for a moment you forget the pain in favor of the embarrassment that comes with the number of heads that turn to look at you. “Sorry. Bit my tongue,” you lie, earning an unconvinced look from Maddie. “Go on,” you nod toward Hyunjin to continue whatever he was saying before directing a furious glare to Jisung, who fails to hide his triumphant smirk as he enthusiastically types on his phone.

Just as you have bent down to rub at your throbbing leg, your phone vibrates twice against the table.

han jisung [now] stop staring, ur lucky hwang is as dense as a rock or he would have left a long time ago bc of you

han jisung [now] so THAT’S the ‘cutest guy ever’ huh? so ur straight after all

Squeezing your hands into fists, you prepare to fire back a reply that will have him crying. But he has different plans.

“Oh, Hyunjin, did YN tell you she’s a dancer, too?” He exaggerates your previous mention of dancing and has the audacity to wink at you. Thanks, Mr. Match Maker.

“Really?” Hyunjin gasps excitedly, eyes lighting up and totally missing the flabbergasted what? that sputters from your lips.

“I – well, no,” you hiss, scowling at Jisung, “I used to do ballet when I was younger but that’s it. Why, though? Do you dance?”

“He’s here on a scholarship,” Seungmin explains, “and minors in creative writing.”

“Oh,” you squeak, glancing to Hyunjin who is all but smiling like a cherub, completely oblivious, “that’s amazing. You must have a crazy schedule.” Chewing the last of his waffle, he hums in agreement. “Yeah, it gets really stressful at times. But it’s worth it,” Hyunjin chuckles. Then fucking winks.

Unable to hold his gaze, you whip your head back around in a panic and reach for the mere sip left of your juice. “Speaking of crazy schedules,” he hums, slapping both Jisung and Seungmin on the shoulders, “I must head out. This was fun. I may start crashing the party more now.” Rising from his seat, Hyunjin swings his bag over a shoulder and grins brightly. Realizing it would be rude to not say goodbye, you force yourself to look back to him and offer a feeble wave.

“And YN, don’t bite your tongue when you eat, yeah?”

You’re going to pass out.

two.

Felix likes to think of you as his corrupted child when it comes to smoking weed.

A few weeks before you would all be returning home for winter break, he came knocking on your door with a proposition. “No one wants to smoke with me. Do you want to?”

This, for sure, was not what you were expecting on a cold Tuesday night in December. Despite the general curiosity and always wanting to ‘try it’ simply to feel like a teenager breaking the rules, you told him you never smoked before. “I know,” he said with a smile, “that’s why I’m asking.”

So, you agreed. Reaching for your hand, Felix snuck you out the window and led you halfway across campus to the junior parking lot, giving you ample opportunities to back out when he felt how badly you were shaking. “Whose car is this?” You laughed in disbelief when he unlocked a beaten-up Nissan near the outskirts of the lot.

“Kim Woojin. The junior?” He replied once you settled in the passenger seat next to him. “Oh.” You blinked, confused. “He lets you smoke in his car?”

“He gets me weed, too,” Felix giggled, reaching into the pockets of his sweatshirt and coming out with two tightly wrapped blunts, each about two inches long, “I’ll turn the heat on a little so we don’t freeze but we have to keep the windows open. I’m not going to have you hotbox for your first time.” You had no idea what that meant, but you agreed nonetheless.

With a brief lesson on what to do that truly made no sense until you tried it for yourself, Felix lit the blunt, took a few small hits to get it started, and then passed it to you. Holding it gingerly between your thumb and index finger, you brought the unlit end to your lips and sucked as he instructed ‘like a straw,’ breathing it into your lungs and ignoring the faint taste of smoke. Unsure of when to stop, it wasn’t until your throat felt as if it was on fire did you realize just how much you had inhaled.

“Shit,” you wheezed, coughing and choking and watching with wide eyes at the amount of cloudy white smoke that left your mouth and nostrils. Passing it back to Felix, you scrambled for the cold water bottle he brought along, downing half of it in one go to soothe the burn. “Good?” He asked, blowing out the window and turning back to you with eyes full of concern.

“Yeah,” you huffed, “give me a few, though.”

Humming in agreement, Felix connected his phone to the car’s Bluetooth and began playing what he calls his ‘getting high playlist,’ and before long, you fell in love with the feeling.

When break was over, you were dying to try it again. Felix was more than happy to be of service.

For all of March, it turned into a daily thing.

Now, you try to smoke only once a week for the sake of not dying, or something.

australian felix kjellberg❤️ [now] come hang at 201?

When the text notification pops up in the corner of your laptop screen amid your YouTube binge, your bones jitter with a mix of dread and excitement.

Dread, because that’s Hyunjin’s room. Excitement, because that’s Hyunjin’s room.

Maddie must hear your sigh. “What’s wrong?” She asks from her cozied position in bed, hand deep in a bag of popcorn.

“It’s Felix,” you start, “but he said to go to Hyunjin’s room.”

She blinks, unfazed. “And? I don’t see the problem here.”

“Well, I don’t know,” you count on your fingers, “first, I don’t know how to act around Hyunjin sober. Second, I don’t know how to act around Hyunjin high. Third, I am very touchy when high. Fourth, Hyunjin is always touchy.”

Maddie scoffs. “That’s a pretty lame argument, YN,” she laughs, “isn’t that what you want to happen?”

“Well,” she’s got a point, “yes, but it still makes me nervous. He makes me nervous.” Closing your laptop, you shimmy out of bed and debate changing out of your cotton shorts and tee shirt. Nah. You’ll probably end up going back to Felix’s and sleeping there. You put a sports bra and deodorant on and call it a day.

Maddie finds this hilarious. “You know what should make you nervous? The fact that you’re usually the only girl getting high with, what? Six guys? You know they all want to fuck you.”

“I try not to think about that, actually,” cringing, you try to erase Felix’s voice when he’s high as a kite or Changbin’s arms from your mind, “and you don’t know that. Sometimes Ryujin and Lia are there. Or, you know, you could always come. You don’t have to smoke, just come hang out. I know you want to give Minho a fat smooch.”

Her nose wrinkles in disgust. “I love you, and I appreciate the invite, but I don’t feel like babysitting a bunch of stoners, even if Minho is there.”

Laughing, all you can offer her is a shrug. “I don’t blame you,” grabbing your phone, wallet, and charger, you make your way over to her and bend over to press a goodnight kiss to her forehead, “if you need me, don’t. I’ll probably be dead.”

“Oh Lord,” Maddie cackles, watching you struggle to open the window, “don’t die. I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“I’ll try,” you grin, military saluting once you’ve managed to flop over the ledge. With one last wave, you close the window behind you and thank admissions for giving you a room on the first floor.

[9:34 PM] YN: omw now, gather your forces to help me in :)

Nights in 201 are always interesting. First, their room is on the second floor, so climbing through the window is an experience. Things would be a hell of a lot easier if you could just walk in and out of residence halls as you please, but with the officer at the front desk documenting who comes in and who goes out, there would be a knock at the door at midnight asking you to leave. Second: as Maddie said, 201 means the whole squad is showing up. And when the whole squad shows up, you’re bound to feel a mix of anxiety and desire deep within your bones no matter how hard set you are on Mr. Hwang. And third: you know you’re in for one fucked up night.

[9:42 PM] YN: hereee

Standing awkwardly behind their building, you try and calm the nerves that always come when you know you will be with Hyunjin. Considering how close the two of you have become over the past few months, one would think you would have gotten a grip on those pesky feelings.

Yet again, it’s kind of hard to do that when he looks and acts like that all the time.

When the window slides open, you are expecting Changbin to hang halfway out for you to grab on to with the rest of them holding onto his legs. Instead, a tall, metal ladder of sorts is pushed out until it lands with a thud! at your feet, granting you a perfect staircase into the room.

Well, you certainly don’t see that every day.

Blinking in confusion, you do not know whether to focus on the crowd of boys waving at you from above or this abomination of a stepstool that was practically thrown out a window for you. Accepting the chain of events as just another fever dream of an experience in 201, you shake your head and begin to ascend on shaky legs, graciously taking Jisung’s hand and clinging to both him and Seungmin as they help you into the room. “Thanks,” you huff, giving them both a hug in return to their chivalry. And they dare say it’s dead!

Behind you, Changbin and Hyunjin lift the ladder-stepstool mutation back into the room and it isn’t until they have folded it into a more compact piece and set it against the wall do you speak up.

“Did you… buy a ladder?”

“Yes!” Minho bellows, thrilled by your successful entrance. “Isn’t it great?” After pulling back from a hug, he keeps his hands on your shoulders just to shake you like a bobble-head.

“Yes,” you grunt once he’s released you, head swimming, “a lot easier than hauling both me and Changbin through the window, right?” Looking to said boy, you can’t help but melt into his side when he pulls you close. “No worries,” Changbin beams, rubbing your arm, “at least we have some funny memories now.” When he moves to flop onto his bed, you realize with a shudder that you are alone with Hyunjin.

Well, technically not alone since they are all right there, but alone in the sense that they are not paying attention to you nor him.

“Hey, YN. I missed you,” he singsongs, engulfing you in one of his monster bear hugs. Disregarding the heart palpitations they may cause, Hyunjin’s hugs are truly the best and you wish you would initiate them more if it didn’t seem like such a big deal in that smooth brain of yours. “I missed you, too,” you mutter into his chest, squeezing your arms around him as if to engrave this feeling into your mind forever. “We saw each other, like, five hours ago,” he reminds you, finally pulling back and taking your will to live with him. God, he has no idea.

“And? You’re the only one here who doesn’t make me suicidal,” you lie because, in reality, he actually does. Just in a different way. “Aw,” he coos, large hand squeezing your side and you think you could orgasm on command, “good thing we have tonight, then, yeah?”

“Yeah,” you squeak, finally remembering to breathe when he steps away to sit beside Seungmin on his bed. Suddenly, you are feeling incredibly grateful no one is next to Changbin because, well, 1) he is closer to Felix and 2), you need a distraction.

“Hello, Felix,” you greet the boy sunk deep in a bean bag chair, busy grinding leaves and packing them into the bowl of a bong. “How are you this fine evening, YN?” He asks once you have settled beside Changbin, brows knitting together when the older boy drapes his arm around your waist.

“Good. Tired, though. How ‘bout you?”

“You didn’t have to come if you’re tired! We all know you work your ass off, no one’s gonna judge if you chose to stay home and sleep,” Felix expresses, giving you a look that screams ‘mom.’

“No! I’m not that tired,” you assure him, reaching for his hand and squeezing for extra effect, “you know I wouldn’t miss this. You’ve made me a pothead.”

With a proud smile, he returns to his designated job and begins working on the second, smaller bong. “So,” stretching to set your things on the desk beside Changbin’s bed, you turn to him with a knowing smile, “how’s the album coming?”

“Great!” He beams, eyes lighting up at the topic. “Jisung is a great addition. Did I tell you we started meeting with someone else, too?”

“No, who?”

“He’s a sophomore, Bang Chan?” Somewhere behind you, Felix passes a bong to Jisung for the first hit. “Bang Chan? Holy shit, Binnie,” repeatedly punching his arm to express your excitement, “that’s amazing! I didn’t know he was into music production. Not that I’ve ever talked to him, but.”

“No, I get you,” he hums, giving your side a firm squeeze, “he’s really awesome making beats. I hope we’re successful.” Then, reaching past you, he takes the second bong and a lighter from Felix. When he resituates himself, he’s considerably closer than before. You don’t mind.

“Ladies first?” Changbin offers with a crooked grin, handing them to you. Then, on second thought, he holds onto the lighter to do the honors. “Sure. Thanks,” you laugh, glancing across the room to find everyone arguing over which color to set the lights to as they wait for their high. Bringing the tube to your lips, you offer a miniscule nod to him and then he is setting flame to the bowl. Sucking strong enough to generate bubbles, you unplug the bowl once he stops and breathe in as much as your lungs can handle in one go. Then, once you have exhaled, you quickly finish what’s left in the tube before passing it to Changbin with a pleased smile.

“That was a lot,” he points out once you have handed the bong back to him. “Hey, you’re the one who kept lighting it for thirty seconds. Mother would be proud,” you joke, reciprocating the same service and lighting the bowl until he glares at you beneath his bangs.

The best part about being high is the fact that you are constantly laughing. Things won’t even be that funny, but once someone starts laughing—you’re done for. You laugh so hard it hurts, and then once it’s all over, you realize it wasn’t funny at all. “Has anyone ever told you that you look like a squirrel?” Minho asks Jisung at some point. You absolutely loose it. It quite possibly is the funniest thing you have ever heard.

Pouting, Squirrel Boy leaves Minho alone on his bed to come crash beside you. “How are you, my tender oozing blossom?”

Squinting at him past the way your eyes burn, you make grabby hands and pull him close to wrap your arms around his teeny waist. Changbin grumbles in protest, but he’s too transfixed on the light’s soft in and out fade of different colors to say anything else. “Please, don’t ever call me that again,” you mumble into Jisung’s mop of brown hair.

“What?” He gasps, tilting to look up at you with puppy eyes. “You didn’t like it?”

“Nope,” smiling lazily, you rest your head atop his, “I love you, but I’m not ready for pet names yet.” His face morphs from a frown to one lit with excitement. “Holy shit, did you just say you love me? Do my eyes deceive me?”

“That would be your ‘ears,’ but yes,” you hum, brain simply not capable of denying it the way your sober self would. “More than Changbin?” Jisung whispers.

“Yes, but don’t tell him,” you return quietly, biting back a laugh.

“More than Hyunjin?” He counters. At this, you look up to find said boy sat with his legs to his chest across the room. Next to Seungmin, he looks like a giant; but a happy, pouty giant that keeps talking about how much he could go for a winter melon tea right now.

“Never.”

One and a half (half because it was just the rest of Minho’s terribly big hit that left tears streaming down his cheeks) and an unfinished game of Cards Against Humanity later, you find yourself in a blissful headspace. The song playing quietly through Felix’s speaker makes it feel like you are bouncing down stairs and then going up again, and the lights are oh so pretty, pink fading to red, yellow to green, blue to purple and so on. Things are fuzzy but crystal clear at the same time, the popcorn you’ve been shoveling into your mouth tastes heavenly, and your body feels like it is engulfed in a warm, comforting hug.

Or, that could just be Changbin.

Somewhere in between trying to get more comfortable and him yanking you to stay next to him when you attempted to get up and hug Seungmin for something sweet he said, you now find yourself on your back with a clinging Changbin on your side. You are so comfortable, but also insanely hot, and as you begin to slowly come down from your high as the hours tick by, you begin to realize it’s for another reason.

What started as an innocent hand on your side turned into his thumb rubbing meaningless patterns against your shirt, which then turned into his hand slipping beneath to splay against the warmth of your skin. Growing increasingly needy as the minutes go by, you turn to look at everyone around you. Jisung, who found himself returning to Minho, appears to be passed out with him on the far end of the room. Seungmin, curled up on the floor with a pillow and a heap of blankets. Felix, who finished off the rest of his weed, scrolls aimlessly on his phone still at the peak of his high.

And Hyunjin, who you assume has been fast asleep on his bed for a while now if the arm flung over his face tells you anything. For a moment, you feel sick with sadness. So close, but so far he lies, always a step out of reach. But you can’t deny how Changbin makes you feel—for right now, at least. And it would be a shame to miss out on an opportunity with someone else because the one you want is unattainable.

Right?

Changbin must sense the way your breathing increases, must feel the way your body reacts to the slightest of touches, yet he takes his time. He is soft in the way his hand travels up your arm, rough fingertips grazing over your collarbones before smoothing down over your chest and abdomen. It isn’t until you are about to burst at the seams does he give your ass a strong squeeze and urge your leg over his hips.

“Changbin,” you sigh, biting your lip to keep from whimpering when he begins pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses down the length of your throat. “Please touch me.”

He only makes a sound of agreement, savoring the way you squirm and grip onto his arm for dear life. When he offers an experimental roll of his hips to grind against you, you practically go feral. The last time you were touched in such a way was at a party in the beginning of the semester Jisung and co. physically forced you to go to, and Changbin has barely even touched you and it’s already better than the rushed sex you had that night.

“Wait,” he huffs, pausing his ministrations no matter how difficult it is to do so, “we can’t.”

“What?” You hiss, trying to keep your voice quiet, “why?”

“Because you’re high, and I’m high, and I’m not going to do anything unless you really want me to,” Changbin explains, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips when you frown in response. “But I do want you to,” you huff, chasing his mouth for another, “I trust you one hundred percent.”

“Are you sure, YN?” What about Hyunjin? is what he really means and you know he’s right. You should have never told Felix.

Trying to ignore the wetness of your underwear, you turn to lie on your back. “Whatever. Never mind,” you mumble, and when you glance back to him, you can’t help the way your heart soars with him still pressed closely to your side, blinking tiredly at you. But like he said, it’s not Hyunjin. “Just get some sleep, Binnie. Forget it happened,” smiling past the tears that threaten to spill, you ruffle his hair and press a softer kiss to his forehead.

“I’m sorry,” Changbin whispers, returning the affection with a kiss to your shoulder. In minutes, he is snoring softly beside you.

You can’t fall asleep to save your life.

Reaching for your phone to check the time, you grit your teeth once you realize it’s almost four and you definitely have been staring at the ceiling for more than an hour. For starters, you are freezing now; unlike these passed out hooligans, you are showing a lot more skin and not being under the blankets is not doing you well. And secondly, it’s hard to fall asleep when your thoughts are flying miles a minute.

Is this how it’s going to be, then? Whenever you see someone, will the little guy on your shoulder whisper in your ear that it’s not Hyunjin? Or will people deem you off limits because they know of your infatuation? People who know, at least—Changbin is the first, apparently.

Just need to get comfy, you decide, trying to ignore such thoughts and turning to lie on your stomach. Bless Felix for leaving the lights on, too—you may be coming down from your high, but the vibe is simply immaculate. Tucking a hand under your cheek and following the ropes of light on the ceiling and up the walls, you find this to be enough to calm your nerves. Enough to make your eyelids heavy. Finally.

Someone lets out a monster train snore. Seungmin, you think, biting your lip to keep from laughing. Or, it could be Hyunjin. The thought is so amusing you can’t help but squint at the boy across from you to better see his outline, hoping he will do it again just to confirm.

No, not Hyunjin.

Because he’s facing you, eyes open, a soft smile plastered on his face. Well, fuck.

No reason to panic, you console yourself, returning a gentle smile in the assumption he can even see you. And you stay like that for a while, simply watching one another for an infinite amount of time. It’s not much, but it means something, you think, lost in the way the contours and highlights of his face change with each color the lights fade to. Just as you remember the whole point of getting on your stomach was to fall asleep, Hyunjin moves. Reaching for his phone, you watch in confusion as he brings it close to his face and starts typing.

hwang hyunjin👁👄👁 [now] Come sleep w me?

You almost throw up in your mouth. You must be dreaming. Surely.

Blinking against the harsh light of your phone, you cannot help your smile as you reread the text.

[4:02 am] YN: wont that b a little sus for bin

[4:02 am] hwang hyunjin👁👄👁: If anyone asks just say he kept kicking u or something

You don’t need to be told twice. Now that he has turned onto his side facing the other direction, Changbin does not stir once you slowly move to sit up and stand, nor when you reach for the quilt crumbled at the foot of the bed to pull over him. It’s not much, but hopefully it will keep him from waking in a few hours freezing to death. Then, as you tiptoe your way over to Hyunjin’s bed, avoiding Felix now that he’s sprawled half way off the bean bag, you cannot tell if you are still shivering from the cold or if the fact you are going to be sleepingwith Hyunjin in one, tiny single bed is finally clicking in your brain. Like Maddie said, this is something you want, right?

As you draw closer, Hyunjin shifts to make room and lifts the covers for you to quietly slip beneath. “Thank you,” you whisper, pulling the blanket up to your chin and trying to ignore the feeling of being so close to him. “Of course. You looked real cold over there,” he smiles tiredly. Then, his arm cautiously curls around you to rest by your head, fingers swiping stray hairs away from your face.

“I was,” you admit. Eyes level to his lips, you strain to look him in the eyes to resist the temptation now that he’s pulled you so close. “Changbin fell asleep and I felt bad waking him.”

Hyunjin doesn’t reply. He seems momentarily lost in thought, brows slightly furrowed as he chews on the inside of his lip.

“Do you like him?” He finally asks, voice shaky with hesitation.

“What?” You sputter, shocked at such a presumption. Yet again…

“No, no I don’t. I mean—as a friend, yes, but, you know,” you trail off, squeezing your eyes shut. You desperately wish you were not having this conversation right now. “He was touching you, though. And it looked like you liked it,” Hyunjin whispers, thumb swiping against your cheekbone.

“I mean, well yeah, I did. But I’m not close enough to like him like that. It’s just a physical attraction,” realizing you are discussing what went down with Changbin to Hyunjin, you suddenly pull back and lean up on an elbow to get a better look at him, heat now spreading up your limbs like fire. “Were you watching us, Hwang?”

“Yes,” he admits, “it’s kind of hard not to.” Your heart stops beating.

“I – what?” You manage once you have remembered how to breathe. “I didn’t know you were awake, we wouldn’t have… what do you mean, ‘it’s kind of hard not to?’”

“You know what I mean, YN,” Hyunjin mutters, arm slipping around your waist and pulling you to lie down with him again, this time, your chest pressed to his. “I like looking at you. You’re very pretty.”

You definitely must still be high, because you are seriously having a hard time wrapping your mind around Hyunjin calling you pretty, as well as being so close, and somewhere deep in your mind wonders if he knows. If he knows how your heart is on the line here. Knows that with him moving closer, you are taking a huge risk.

When Hyunjin kisses you, you forget that this could be the worst mistake you’ve made in a long time. Wrapped around his fingers, you pray this is his way of saying he feels the same.

“YN!” You wake to Seungmin gently shaking your shoulder. “YN, wake up. Your phone has been vibrating for twenty minutes now. It’s Maddie.”

The wave of panic washing over you dispels the grogginess you feel from suddenly being yanked from sleep, as well as the recognition of where you are and who you’re with. Frantic, you sit up and nod in thanks to him before taking the call. “Hello?”

“Oh, thank God you answered,” Maddie cries, voice choked, “I’m sorry, I know you’re still out, but I just threw up and I feel so terrible and when I get up I feel so nauseous. Can you come home?”

“Shit, Maddie, don’t apologize,” you whisper, rushing to grab your things as Seungmin unfolds The Ladder as quietly as possible, “I’m leaving now. Don’t move, you don’t want it to get worse. I’ll be there as fast as I can, okay?”

“Okay,” she whimpers before hanging up.

“Thank you, Minnie,” pressing a kiss to his cheek, you begin to climb down. “Is everything okay?” He asks, watching as you go with a worried frown. “Yes, it’s fine. Just a little emergency, don’t worry,” praying no one is out and about watching as you climb from the back of their building, you rush back to help Maddie as fast as you can.

You stay back in your dorm with Maddie for the rest of the weekend, fetching her water and ginger ale and food she can handle, helping her to the restroom, and binging all sorts of shows and movies with her. Seungmin, Jisung, and Minho visit Sunday evening, joining you for a few hours to watch Pokémon. You think it’s just because Minho knew it would be a good opportunity to snuggle with Maddie.

You can’t help but feel disappointed when Hyunjin isn’t with them. You refrained from telling Maddie what happened in 201, too caught up wanting to make sure she was alright, and by now you are starting to feel as if it wasn’t even real. Maybe you made the whole night up in your marijuana-infused brain. And snuggled up with Jisung, you can’t help but wish it was this annoying shit you were falling in love with.

On Monday morning, Hyunjin doesn’t show up for breakfast. On Tuesday, you find out he has been hanging out with a girl he met at his favorite boba joint and apparently won’t shut up about. First, you run back to your dorm to cry to Maddie, having to explain all of Friday night to her. When she leaves for her lab, you call Felix for an emergency smoke session. When Maddie texts that she is going to be out late working on a project, you call Changbin to tell him that you really do want him to.

Like you said, it’s just a physical attraction, right?

⇢ part 2

[script-nef]

Busted | Tsukishima Kei

Request: Hello!! Can I please request a scenario/short fic where Tsukishima has to go pick up his girlfriend from “Girl’s Night” at the karaoke bar? When he gets there his gf is drunk, dur, BUT turns out she can sing like really really good. For a moment he’s utterly speechless but he takes really good care of her and asks about her singing the next day? Maybe she can play dumb about it saying she really can’t but too late he knows the power she holds. Sorry if that was a weird req but tysm in advance!!

Okay so first things first, this is a very cute request and not weird at all! Second thing is that I actually have no idea what a karaoke bar is so I searched it up. And it turns out to be a regular bar with like a little stage so people to sing on? Like that scene from The Good Place? I don’t know if you meant that one but I wrote it based on that, hope that’s fine! :) Third, uhhhh you asked for a short fic and I uh well it’s not really all that short so sorry about that.

Category: crack, fluff

1.4k words; Tsukishima never knew you could sing so well

Tsukishima doesn’t really like it when you go out for “Girls’ Night”s all that much. He’s glad you have quality time with your friends and burn off the stress from your work, but he often wonders if bars are the best place. 

It’s probably because of his aversion to alcohol. And drunk people. If you also add in the fact that your favourite venue just so happens to be a karaoke bar, of all things, he would never fathom the idea of stepping a foot into it unless his life was on the line.

And yet, here he is, slipping into the godforsaken place at 11:30 pm on a work night.

His brows immediately crease as a drunk couple makes out right next to the entrance and expertly swerves past them. The place is filled with groups and couples in similar positions, just climbing over each other in their inebriated states without a care for others’ gazes. It’s amazing what alcohol can do and he sincerely hopes you’re being smart about your intake for the night.

That hope is swiftly crushed as you teeter onto the small karaoke stage with the melody of your favourite song blaring in the background. Your face is what could only be described as crimson to the point he can’t tell where your dress ends and your skin starts. You sway a bit on stage like you’re trying to balance yourself on a ship while there’s a tidal wave happening and Tsukishima can practically predict what’s going to happen next.

So he makes his way to you as fast as he can so that you won’t have an embarrassing memory to wake up to tomorrow morning. He doesn’t even understand why you insist on this karaoke bar when there’s a very high chance of you getting drunk and singing in front of literal strangers—and some friends—when you don’t even like singing in front of him. You occasionally hum while lazing around the house but never sang, claiming that your voice was horrible and also unfortunately tone-deaf. There was a stare-down when you said that because if you were actually tone-deaf, then you wouldn’t be nailing every note in your hums. But he let it go because you turned red and pattered off. 

He’s just about there when you finally open your mouth to start singing, and he can’t help to freeze completely on the spot.

Your voice is beyond amazing. 

It rings out loud and clear throughout the room, forcing everyone to direct their attention to you. It’s like they’re entranced at the performance, and they have a very good reason to. It sounds like you’re pouring your heart and soul into this one song, determined to broadcast it to the best of your abilities. And the quality of it means you’ve practised this before. A lot. 

He stands there, speechless and dumbstruck, eyes trained on you until the song slowly fades away. The room explodes with cheers and applauds, and someone chants for an encore. You give a shaky bow with a bright smile and stumble off the stage right into Tsukishima’s awaiting arms. You mutter an apology and try to free yourself from his grasp, but stop struggling as soon as you see his face.

“Tsukki! Wha… watchu you doin’ here? You have the—the thing with the weird bones tomorrow!”

“Yes, I have my work with my museum tomorrow and yet I’m here for you. Come on, let’s go home.”

“Home! Yes, yes, fwoof. Pushy bed. It’s going to eat me!”

“I have literally no idea what you’re saying but I hope you remember this tomorrow so I can have something to embarrass you with. Say goodbye to your friends.” Your arms sway pathetically in the air as you mumble out something which sounds like but is dubiously related to “Bye now! The beddie are waiting me!” You never make sense when you’re drunk.

He holds you steady while you walk back home, careful of your stumbling steps. Just as he’s about to question you about the singing and why you’ve never sung in front of him, you slump onto his side, eyes closed and off to dreamland. Tsukishima sighs in soft exasperation and carries you home, glad that the venue is relatively close to your shared house.

Regaining some semblance of consciousness when he’s unlocking the house, you flail out of his grip and stomp into the house. It seems like you’re going straight to bed but he stops you to remind you of your shoes, makeup, clothes, brushing your teeth and drinking at least five cups of water to avoid a hangover. Thankfully you finish the first four, not without pouting and whispering nonsense the entire time, but tap out after 2 glasses.

Once in bed, you poke your head out from the blanket burrito you constructed yourself and give him a peck on the lips. “Thank you… pointy-nose. I have the bestest giraffe in the world. Nighty night Mr Moon.”

“Yes well, I wish I can say the same if my girlfriend wasn’t drunk half out of her mind, calling me weird nicknames and keeping things from me. Why didn’t you tell me you could sing so well?” You would normally have blushed and squeaked out an explanation, but you’re knocked out again. Tsukishima sighs once more and cages you in his arm, filing the interrogation away in his head for tomorrow morning. He assumes the headache of combined with the embarrassing memories of this night will make it easy for you to tell the truth.

“My head hurts…” This is the first thing that greets Tsukishima when he wakes up. A small whining voice from his chest squiggling around and complaining. “Tsukki… ‘m dying…”

“Humans don’t die that easily. You’re annoyingly tenacious.” That earns a weak slap on the arm. “Fine, let’s wake up. You need to drink some more water and eat something.” You don’t budge at all, so he has to carry you again to the kitchen while you whine about being stolen from warmth and comfort.

After forcing two cups of water and a banana down your throat, Tsukishima focuses on making himself a breakfast at the ungodly time of 5 am. Another annoying habit you have is waking up early after a drink-fest even though literally every other drunk sleeps in.

“Mmm… Thanks. You’re the best…” You mumble out while chewing on another banana, eyes drooping down like you’re about to fall asleep again. “I won’t ever drink that much again, I promise…”

“Oh no, but then how will you gain the confidence to sing in front of strangers when you haven’t ever sung in front of me, your boyfriend? Under the pretence of a ‘bad voice’?” You’re the one that freezes now, like a deer caught in headlights. Your eyes are wide and quaking slightly, to his intense amusement, no doubt trying to remember the events of last night. 

He stares right back, an eyebrow raised as if to say “what kind of an excuse are you going to give?” but in the most unimpressed way possible. Your eyes bounce around to corners of the house while expertly avoiding him, until you finally settle on a decision.

Silence takes over the house. The chair you were sitting on makes a horrible screeching noise as you bolt out of it, hightailing to the bedroom in order to find a hole to crawl into and die in. Just as you’re about to enter, an arm slams right in front of you and effectively cuts you off from escaping this situation. 

Tsukishima traps you in his arms, head leaning down to lightly bump his forehead against yours. “Why didn’t you tell me you could sing so well?” This position is the best when trying to pry information out of you because apparently, being surrounded by his form makes you weak and susceptible. Sure enough, red takes over your face again and stutters spill out.

“I just— I’m just really embarrassed singing in front of you because you told me you don’t like it when people sing along to songs and I— I thought it would bother you! It’s not like I was hiding the fact, it’s more li—” Your further ramblings are cut off as Tsukishima presses his lips to yours for a quick peck.

“It’s fine if it’s you. At least you don’t sound like a monkey howling in the dead of the night, unlike some people.” That earns a laugh out of you and he pulls you back into the kitchen. “Now, let’s see what else you’ve been keeping a secret from me.”

[sannflwrr]

Cat Ears

Author: sannflwrr

Pairing: Jungkook x MC

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: cursing, use of guns, mild description of a gunshot wound, mutual pining lol, MC has a helmet with cat ears

Summary: In a world of cute bikers and exhilarating city nightlife, Jungkook finds himself running from trouble when he encounters a bitter ex. A blessing disguised as a curse, his long-time (and current) crush arrives just in time to save him. Will he have the courage to confess to her, or is this yet another attempt at failed love?

Jungkook knows he made a terrible terrible mistake. It probably was not a good idea to enter the casino where his ex fling usually spends her evenings. That’s where they had met, though it had been a while. She hates him, Jungkook doesn’t really care about her enough to have an opinion. But he knows she hates him, yet he chose to enter the casino where she’s at. And he chose to piss off the owner of this said casino, knowing well that he definitely cheated during gambling, and that the owner happens to be his exe’s older cousin. Apparently they are close. Apparently her enemies also happen to be his.

So, it definitely makes sense why Jungkook is running a mile a minute down the windy streets of the city, half laughing and half crying. He’s definitely in a predicament, originally knew where he was going, but not so much anymore. Why does he choose to voluntarily throw himself in these situations? Maybe the thrill. He doubts it though, there is nothing exciting about ten bad guys chasing after you, definitely armed and well built. His shoulder has already been grazed by one of their appropriately aimed bullets, and though it hurts like shit Jungkook does not let the pain slow him.

Things change of course, when he reaches a fork in the road, buildings obstructing his view on where exactly each direction leads. The one on the right leads to darkness, and the pathway on the left leads to darkness. He can definitely see them catching up now, each second only lessening his lead over them. Things change of course, when I show up. Peering over a rooftop, I laugh at his current situation before hopping down from the roof to the concrete, readjusting for a moment. Jungkook looks at me in shock, about to ask what the hell I’m doing here before I yank on his wrist, pulling him into the left path. Then we’re both running this time, I’m surprised that I keep up with him.

“Fae.” He breathes out still in mid sprint, and looks at me desperately. “What?”

“Watched this whole situation from the roofs.” I explain, pulling him into yet another skinny alley, just to catch a breath. “Made me laugh honestly. Now what did you do this time?”

He has big eyes, ones which are still looking at me in surprise. Did I just confess to stalking his little chase from the beginning? Yeah. Does that mean that I admitted that I actually keep an eye on him? In my eyes, it does, but Jungkook is pretty dense. I doubt he’s seen through my actual intent on the words.

“Ex.” He groans. “Cheated.”

“You…you have an ex?” I ask, this time it’s my turn to be surprised.

“No! No. She’s a past fling. Got pissed at me when I broke off whatever the fuck we were doing, haven’t spoken to her in months.” He doesn’t know why he’s rushing so fast to explain the situation to me. Well maybe he does, scratch that. Jungkook definitely knows. “Showed up at the casino where she usually is, kind of caused a scene by cheating in bluff, she already had a grudge so that made it ten times worse when they caught on. Sprinted when I got the chance.”

“Sounds like a bitch.” I muse, scanning the coast. They’ve run past the both of us now. Any minute, they will come back to this specific hall. Jungkook and I have around thirty seconds tops to run. “You had me there for a second. I didn’t think you were the type to have exes.”

He scowls. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Player maybe?” I tilt my head, grinning at him teasingly. I notice him inhale when I nudge my nose closer to his face. “Maybe you’ve never actually dated someone before.”

There is something about me, I guess. Jungkook does not know what it is, but it’s been there for a long time. Like a small pink glow, only growing brighter with every moment he spends with me. It’s not a crush, though it used to be.

Nah, Jungkook is in between the stage of falling and fallen.

Then my face shifts back to seriousness, stepping back as if nothing had just happened. Maybe it’s an excuse to myself of keeping my hand closer to his, I tug on his wrist, fingers deftly looping around his skinny one, then pull him further down the alley.

“My bike is further down, maybe three or four blocks away.” I whisper, careful that it doesn’t echo around the buildings near us. “You always wanted to ride it, didn’t you? Now’s your chance.”

“You want me to drive?” He gapes. Jungkook is normally pretty suave, has a smart mouth and knows how to keep his calm and cool. Around me though, that does not seem to be the case. He seems borderline ready to either piss his pants or kiss me. I wouldn’t mind if he did the latter, to be honest. “Drive your bike?”

“Why not?” I snort. “But rules are that you have to wear the helmet. No buts.”

“It can’t be that bad.”

I laugh again, only to be cut short when we hear the yells of This way! following shortly after us. He curses to himself, and it’s his turn to pull me into some random corridor. We keep doing this, slowly confusing his pursuers. Even if they did catch up, if they did find us, I’m positive we would be able to take them. Jungkook is pretty strong. No, he’s really strong. I know how to fight, my style is totally unorthodox but it works. Consists a lot of screaming and acting like a madwoman, but it has a high success rate. We could take them, but then I notice the graze on Jungkook’s shoulder.

“They’re trying to shoot you?” I ask, shocked. “It’s not that serious!”

“She really hates me Fae.”

“Why?” I look at him pointedly, the expression which he does not like to see. It’s hot when directed at others, but Jungkook winces when I force it at him. “What did you do? Did you knock her up?”

“No! I don’t know, she told me that she liked me…wanted to take things to the next level. I guess I rejected her pretty bluntly.” I mumble.

“And why did you reject her? Not that I really need to know…” I trail, now more curious than annoyed. Because of you! Jungkook wants to yell in my face, and practically declare his infatuation for me. How much he thinks about my freakishly crazy laugh, the fact that I drive a motorcycle in itself rather than a car, that I’m honest, I don’t pick sides, don't choose favorites. Everything about me screams badass to him, in a non-seductive way. Screams the fact that he is totally bananas for an unpredictable and crazy girl. A ridiculously pretty girl.

“We should go.” He mumbles close to my ear, then starts up into a jog once more. “How far?”

“The block over.” I finally say, unsettled by his sudden choice to evade the question. “Jungkook?”

He turns around once, and I toss the keys. “Go crazy.”

“I love you!” He shrieks, before hooting loudly and bolting off in the same direction. His statement has a platonic undertone to it, I know, yet it makes my stomach flip in a way that it hasn’t before. Maybe it’s the fondness for him, I don’t know. I push it aside, and pick up my pace, catching up to him where he stays seated at the front of my bike.

“Cat ears?” He asks, gesturing to my black and purple helmet. Two large cat ears sprout from either sides of it, a cute accessory. “Seriously?”

“I told you. Rules and rules.”

“So be it.” Reluctantly, he places the helmet over his head. I try to stifle a laugh at how he looks, knowing that he’s glaring at me from underneath it. I press the button which lowers the shield.

“To be fair, Jungkook. You actually look a lot cuter in it compared to Jimin.”

“Jimin?” He questions, then narrows his eyes. “You let him ride your bike too?”

“Yeah I was drunk. He took me back to my place.”

“Is that where we’re going now?” He asks quietly after pulling up the guard, looking ahead at the exit. I prop a leg over the bike, fixing my hair momentarily in the mirror. His head shifts to look at the bike mirror, then back ahead.

“Yeah.” I nod. “Can't go to your place obviously, they’ll be expecting that.” He starts the engine. “Besides, you’re injured.”

“I’m fine.” He mumbles, though pretty muffled under the helmet. I scoff. “Yeah right. If you don’t get that looked at, you definitely won’t be fine later on.”

Maybe he would’ve said something snarky in response, but Jungkook doesn’t. Instead his breath hitches when my arms slide around his waist, wrapping him in a tight hold. I hesitate for a second, then rest my chin on his non-injured shoulder.

“You sound nervous. Don't be; I wouldn’t have let you drive my bike if I didn’t trust you.”

Then Jungkook starts moving. Good timing too, just as he begins to twist the throttle, the goons reappear for another encore. I retract one of my arms from him, sweeping down to the compartment hidden near Jungkook’s leg.

“You have a gun?” He asks, awkwardly accelerating at an odd incline. I turn back to shoot at the nearest one to us. Catches them off guard. I snort in satisfaction, with the distance he’s already covered, it’s safe to say the two of us are out of aim for them. Especially with the trivial handgun. I put back in its original spot.

“Yeah. Second Amendment and all.”

“Remind me to never piss you off.”

“I don't think you could if you tried, Jungkook.”

Content with my words, I chose not to say anything for the remainder of the ride, just taking in the colors and lights of the city as we pass. Thousands of thoughts race through Jungkook’s head, simmering him into silence. I have never hugged him before, this would be a first. Though it makes his insides do a weird jig, it doesn’t sit as well knowing that Jimin also got to drive me on my bike. And since he has this silly little crush on me, maybe it’s the fact that Jimin got to drive me home which makes him jealous.

He knows the way to my house, since he’s been by a couple times before. The first time was when I had people over for drinks. That had been fun, Jungkook was surprised I even thought to invite him. But Jungkook doesn’t know how much I think about him too. Though I don’t say it aloud, I think about him quite a bit. The second and last time was when I had asked him to pick up some things for me from the drugstore nearby. My bike was at the mechanic for maintenance, and it was too cold to be out. Though he does not have a bike, Jungkook does have a car.

He parks the vehicle smoothly, and I move away from him. I don’t speak the entire way up, careful not to attract any noise or attention. After unlocking the apartment door, I shove Jungkook inside first, before glancing both ways warily, and shutting it behind me. The tension is obviously there, even I can feel it. Jungkook’s eyes follow me wherever I move, even from flipping on the lights, to heading straight to my closet. After pulling out a hoodie, I chuck it back at him.

“Take off your shirt. After I wrap your shoulder, you should put this on instead, it’s clean.”

“Is this mine?” He asks softly.

I falter, then nod. “Yeah. You don’t remember giving it to me?”

“No I do. I’m surprised you still have it.”

Something about those words, I don’t like them. Why would he think I would deliberately give it away? His hoodie? Maybe I give off the impression of a dismissive girl, who doesn’t look too much into the small things, but I do. Jungkook doesn’t know how much I like that specific sweatshirt. Is there anything special about it? No. But it smells like him, and I happen to like how Jungkook smells. It feels like he’s in the same room as me, even if he’s off on the other side of town, running away from his ex’s bodyguards.

“Why would I give it away?”

“I don’t know…” Jungkook finds himself mumbling, suddenly unable to meet my intimidating gaze. “didn’t think you really wanted it. Most people keep clothes they like.”

“You read into me too much.” I mutter, more to myself than him. “No Jungkook, I like the hoodie.” I wear it a lot, but I don’t include that part to him. Jungkook has an ego, and I don’t want to take any part in raising it from its bed. When he pulls off his shirt, the sleeve caked in dry blood, I grimace at the ugly sight.

It’s not really that bad, considering there is no bullet lodged anywhere, but there is blood. After disinfecting it, but to his discomfort from the constant stinging, I wrap his shoulder in a white gauze. His arm is hard under my fingers, yet another reminder of how muscled this man is. When I step back, he looks over to inspect my work.

“Impressive.”

“You still should see the doctor.” I respond, definitely concerned. “That is a lot of bleeding.”

“Sure, whatever.” He’s in the middle of pulling the hoodie over his shirt when he pops the question. “Hey Fae…can I crash here for a little while?”

“Yeah, of course.” I don’t hesitate in my response, simply moving from the couch to my kitchen. The fridge door is cracked open, I raise my half finished soda can to my lips. “Stay as long as you want.”

“Thanks.” I don’t look in his way, so I don’t know if he’s looking at me. But he is, definitely following my small movements as I continue to drink from my can. He has a multitude of questions he wants to ask. Would I be mad if he told me he had a big fat crush on me? Would I be mad if he kissed me? Do I possibly like him back? Rather than be blunt like Jungkook normally is, he takes a completely different route.

“Do you like Jimin?”

He notices me almost spit out my drink into the sink, though the visual is funny — in another situation he would have laughed — but this question makes him nervous. I look at him in disbelief.

“Jimin?” When he nods, I blink. “No I don’t…why?”

“Oh.” Jungkook glances away, taking a particular interest in the photo frames on my wall. “Dunno’. I was trying to figure out whether he liked you or not.”

“There’s no way he would.” And I sound pretty insistent. “No possible way. I’m pretty sure he’s into that one dude who sings at the karaoke bar.”

“Oh. Really?”

“Yeah. Ask him about it, maybe he’ll actually tell you. He wouldn’t tell me a single thing about it when I tried bringing it up when he was here the other day.” I sigh. “And well, even if he had, it wouldn’t work out. I don’t like him like that.”

“Oh.” He repeats. I glance at him for a longer time now, wondering if he’s going to say anything at all. When he doesn’t, I don’t even bother to cloud my disappointment. Turning away, I chuck the can into my recycle bin, taking a hand through my hair.

“Okay!” I slam my hand onto the counter, then plant myself down on the couch next to him. Jungkook seems startled by the sudden loud noise, and even more so now that I’m only a couple feet away from him. “Talk now. Why are you acting so weird?”

“I’m not.”

“Okay let me rephrase.” I take a deep inhale. “I don’t know if it’s just me reading into it too much, but you seemed way too hesitant to tell me why you ended things with your past fling. And that weird cold shoulder you gave when I mentioned Jimin driving me to my place?” I stare up at my clock on the wall. “I mean normally people are completely blind to mutual pining, but for some reason with you and I can completely see through you. Just be honest with me Jungkook; do you like me? Because honestly when you were wearing my helmet earlier today I was trying so hard not to kiss you.”

He blinks, twice, very wide eyed. Looks like that motherfucker Bambi, I just want to squish him. Then glances at me.

“Was I that obvious?”

“To me; yeah.” I snort. “I didn’t understand at first though, I thought you were just going through mood swings.”

“How did I not know that you…” He breathes, cheeks definitely a darker shade of pink. “How?!”

“Well, I did get pretty pissed when you mentioned an ex. Did you not notice?”

He shakes his head woefully.

“Well,” I trail off. “I don’t know. Kinda’ wanted to punch you and then punch that bitch.”

“That’s hot Fae. I’m already imagining it.”

I laugh, about to say something, but that’s forgotten when he kisses me. Good, what a hopeless idiot. I was waiting for him to make a move, looks like he finally did.

[lunasilvermorny]

Festival Fun SQ - Part 2 - where we find out MC has a secret admirer... Great.

What the hell are you talking about, Puppy?

Apparently, like Barnaby’s favorite trainers.

We need to do something about your BO then, mate.

I’m not smiling... you’re smiling!

It was a good burn, alright? I can appreciate it.

Also, big words from someone that failed everything she’s ever tried to accomplish. Well, guess it takes one to know one.

Very specific...

Luna: What about bananas?

Barnaby: Don’t even say that!

Oof, your insecurity is showing, Merula.

I was going to say “valid” until I got to the “melancholy” part and then I choked!

Such a mood.

Lol, Puppy, read the room.

What about subtlety in general as a concept?

Because this whole game is lacking in that department,

Haha, he looks so done with Snape’s shit.

Just let him be happy!

I know it’s supposed to be the moment he puts her on the spot, but in the headcanon she always knows all the answers, so it’s actually very fitting for her.

Too bad it’s still putting me on the spot...

Psssshhh! Please, you think I don’t know this? Easy!

The answer is obviously... the... it’s so clearly the... hmmm... just a sec.

*check on google*

Yes, I totally knew that.

It’s hard to have an MC that is the top student in her class, alright?

I’m trying to be loyal to the headcanon here.

Oh please, let’s see you answer a question correctly then.

Oh wow, I didn’t expect him to actually put her on the spot.

Come on, let’s hear it, hot-shot.

Rejected!

Easy peasy lemon squeezy, mate!

*Google*

Do you hear that?

That’s the sound of Merula failing again.

I almost feel sorry for her... Almost.

Luna: Who wouldn’t know something so basic?

Merula: Shut it, Silver.

Luna: Oh, right. You.

Girl. just take the L and leave, you’re holding the line.

EASY!

Oh, Puppy... lol

At least he’s happy.

Oh Jesus, they’re really making me work for it.

Guess? It wasn’t a guess!

I actually had to look for the ingredients of all these potions.

It was very deliberate and MC should get the proper credit.

Top-student status - preserved!

The thing is... I actually believe her.

Isn’t Merula supposed to be really good with potions in general?

I can totally see why her insecurity sabotaged her ability to give the proper answer. Too bad her attitude is so lousy, otherwise I would have sympathized with her.

Guess!

I’m telling you, Barnaby knows more than he lets people see...

You’re 100% right, Puppy.

Honestly, they’re writing MC to be so stupid, I kinda see why Merula would get frustrated by being upstaged by her.

You mean the unpopular bully that literally no other student likes?

I’m shocked.

Color you lucky, then.

Awww, so cute.

It’s so obvious I’m going to choose him again. The only person I would have chosen over him is Liz. (Well, also Rath, but they never include anyone from the Quidditch plot-line, so...)

How the hell did you manage to see her name is written there?

You were like 4 meters away from it.

“Your gobs”?!

Sounds like an innuendo and not one that’s a fitting description of a cis-woman.

What the hell are her gobs? Do I even want to know? I don’t get the metapho- Ohhhhhh....So it’s from Barnaby.

Right? He knew it was intended for her and the metaphor is completely nonsensical. It has to be from him.

It’s him, I’m 100% sure.

It’s one of those things that I don’t know how to react to, but I wanted to include it anyway...

So... All I can offer is a small shrug with a slight head tilt.

I don’t like his expression... He doesn’t look scared enough.

Begone, year-6 Ben!

This blog accepts only the sweet scardy-cat that we all know and love.

I mean... it is kinda flattering, even though Luna in the headcanon wouldn’t really pay attention to it. She ignores when other people show interest in her, because she’s too focused on her own feelings toward her crushes.

Yep, that’s Luna for you. Always the active party.

Can you hear the collective sigh of despair of all the Charlie x MC shippers?

Creepy?! That’s not what Ben would say in a situation like this! I hate it that they’re forcing year-6 Ben on everyone! Dammit, can’t you even try to be consistent, JC? It’s your freaking game!

Nope. I don’t care. I don’t like it... I’m skipping this part, I refuse to endure this horrible attempt at character development as a part of their dumb year-6 plot.

Next.

Haha, that’s what happens when Jae doesn’t skip class.

Luna: Sure thing, mate.

-----

I actually had to skip all the dialogue with Ben, because it got on my nerves.

Oh well.

[corny-pickuplines]

Corny Pick Up Lines that are very Cheesy to Impress your Crush!

Here are the best Cheesy Corny Pick Up Lines that will help you to impress your crush in a random style. Are you want to impress your dream girl whom you like, but can’t able to say anything in front of her. Then these corniest pick up lines would help you to break the ice and start an awesome conservation to her.

200+ Corny Pick Up Lines For Her

We have Collected the best collection of Corny Pick Up Lines for you, So that you can easily use in front of any person whom you want to impress.

Are you French because Eiffel for you.

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants!

Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears!

Are you religious? Cause you’re the answer to all my prayers.

I’m not a photographer, but I can picture me and you together.

I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?

Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else

Do I know you? ‘Cause you look a lot like my next girlfriend/boyfriend..

You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.

For some reason, I was feeling a little off today. But when you came along, you definitely turned me on.

Was your dad a boxer? Because damn, you’re a knockout!

Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend/girlfriend material?

What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.

I’m lost. Can you give me directions to your heart?

Are you a parking ticket? ‘Cause you’ve got fine written all over you.

Are you religious? Because you’re the answer to all my prayers.

Are you sure you’re not tired? You’ve been running through my mind all day.

Somebody call the cops, because it’s got to be illegal to look that good!

I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you.

I know you're busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list?

If you were a steak you would be well done.

Is there an airport nearby or is it my heart taking off?

They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.

Even if there wasn't gravity on earth, I'd still fall for you.

Roses are red, violets are blue, how would you like it if I came home with you?

I wish I were cross-eyed so I can see you twice

We're not socks. But I think we'd make a great pair.

Your lips look so lonely…Would they like to meet mine?

Are you a parking ticket? ‘Cause you’ve got fine written all over you.

Thank god I'm wearing gloves because you are too hot to handle.

If a fat man puts you in a bag at night, don't worry I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.

Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?

Pinch me, you’re so fine I must be dreaming.

If you were a chicken, you'd be impeccable.

How much does a polar beat weight? Enough to break the ice!

Are you a 90 degree angle? Cause you are looking right!

Nice to meet you, I’m (your name) and you are... gorgeous!

If I were a transplant surgeon, I’d give you my heart.

Are you Israeli? Cause you Israeli hot.

On a scale from 1 to 10, you're a 9... And I'm the 1 you need.

Did it hurt? When you fell out of heaven?

If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put U and I together.

Hello, I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart.

Are you cake? Cause I want a piece of that.

My love for you is like diarrhoea, I just can't hold it in.

Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven is a long way from here.

There is something wrong with my cell phone. It doesn't have your number in it.

If you were a library book, I would check you out.

Are you a cat because I'm feline a connection between us

If I were to ask you out on a date, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?

I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art.

You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent.

I want someone to look at me the way I look at chocolate cake.

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

Are you going to kiss me or do I have to lie to my diary?

Feel my t-shirt, it’s made of boyfriend material.

You must be a magician, because every time I look at you, everyone else disappears.

Your name must be Coca Cola, because you're so-da-licious.

You're like a dictionary... you add meaning to my life.

My doctor says I'm lacking vitamin U.

Did your licence get suspended for driving all these guys crazy?

Do you like sales? Because if you're looking for a good one, clothing is 100% off at my place.

I know this is going to sound cheesy, but I think you're the gratest.

If you were a triangle you'd be acute one.

Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.

My feet are getting cold… because you’ve knocked my socks off.

Wow, when god made you he was showing off.

If beauty were time, you’d be eternity.

Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.

If looks could kill, you'd be a weapon of mass destruction.

Do you have a tan, or do you always look this hot?

Can I follow you home? Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams.

If I were a cat I'd spend all 9 lives with you.

Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.

Are you from Japan cause I'm trying to get in Japanties.

If you were a fruit you'd be a fineapple.

I'll give you a kiss. If you don't like it, you can return it.

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk past again?

When a penguin finds a mate they stay with them for the rest of their life. Will you be my penguin?

Can I take a picture of you so santa knows what I want for christmas?

I'm new in town, could you give me directions to your apartment?

I'll cook you dinner, if you cook me breakfast

What does it feel like to be the most beautiful girl in the room?

Good thing I just bought term life insurance … because I saw you and my heart stopped!

If I had a dollar for every time I thought of you, I’d be in a higher tax bracket.

Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?

Was that an earthquake or did you just rock my world?

You’re so sweet, you’re giving me a toothache.

Did you swallow magnets? Cause you're attractive.

Are you from China? Because I'm China get your number.

Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?

Are you craving Pizza? Because I’d love to get a pizz-a you

Wouldn't we look cute on a wedding cake together.

Would you grab my arm so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel?

Kiss me if I'm wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?

Is your dad a terrorist? Because you are the bomb.

You must be a ninja, because you snuck into my heart

Can you pinch me, because you're so fine I must be dreaming.

I may not be a genie, but I can make all your wishes come true!

Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications.

I’m not drunk, I’m just intoxicated by you.

If I followed you home, would you keep me?

If you were words on a page, you’d be fine print.

Are you a keyboard ? Because you are my type.

There is something wrong with my phone. Could you call it for me to see if it rings?

I've seem to have lost my number, can I have yours?

My lips are like skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?

Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?

Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only 10 I see!

Are you a beaver? Cause daaaaaaaaam!

Life without you is like a broken pencil... pointless.

If I had a garden I’d put your tulips and my tulips together

Did you hear of the new disease called beautiful, I think you're infected.

I thought Happiness starts with H. But why does mine starts with U.

If you were a vegetable you'd be a cutecumber.

You know what you would really look beautiful in? My arms.

My mom thinks I'm gay, can you help me prove her wrong?

Do you want to see a picture of a beautiful person? (hold up a mirror)

Is your body from McDonald's? Cause I'm lovin' it!

Remember me? Oh, that’s right, I’ve met you only in my dreams.

Is your name Google? Because you've got everything I'm searching for.

Your hand looks heavy. Here, let me hold it for you.

I’ve been wondering, do your lips taste as good as they look.

Are you from Starbucks because I like you a latte.

Are you a banana because I find you a peeling.

Do you like vegetables because I love you from my head tomatoes.

Have you been to the doctor's lately? Cause I think you're lacking some vitamin me.

Do you generate electricity with water through the process of hydro power? Because dammmm.

Do you like science because I've got my ion you.

Are you my appendix? Because I don't understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out.

Best Corny Pick Up Lines

When you know how to make good Corny Pick Up Lines women can feel attracted to you, it is not hard to have a relationship with them. You do not need to try very hard and when you see your little gifts for her as a way of showing appreciation for her kindness then it will make it even easier.

How many times has a man kept talking about how he likes someone when he really doesn't like them? That is what this kind of conversations is called. So, while you are actually talking you should not start thinking about how you will get your woman to like you.

Cheesy Pick Up Lines

The key to this is to use simple words that are not really mean but give the idea that you are just being nice. In fact this is probably the best way to do this because you do not need to pretend that you are looking for her approval. These Cheesy Pick Up Lines would really help you to impress her.

By using the idea of compliments you are giving her a great suggestion to be sure she is attracted to you. The more compliments she gets the more attention she will give you and that will give you some space for your game to take off.

It is true that some guys are the only ones who can play with words and are the ones who have great jokes and funny lines. The other things that you can do to get her to like you are obviously the most important and the one that will make you the sexiest man in the world.

You do not need to try and trick her but rather you should pay attention to her and make her feel like she is special to you. You should go out of your way to make her feel that she is special and she is beautiful.

Best Pick Up Lines

This is one of the most important things that you should do and the language that you use will be one of the most important. This is where Best Pick Up Lines come in because these are the words that can really make you seem like the most romantic man in the world.

It is important to learn this language because you will be using it when you try to attract girls but the only problem is that you do not know how to use it correctly. With the help of the Pick Up Lines online there are a few ways that you can begin.

These will give you an opportunity to practice your language and learn some of the other points that you need to use. You do not need to spend a lot of money on this but if you could do it at home you will be much happier.

Keep your confidence high so that you can get your point across. If you want to get her attention then you should be able to use all the charm that you can so you can get some fun.

By taking some time to learn the language you will be able to make some excellent picks and pick up lines to go along with your game. You can then use this knowledge and get some great girls to fall in love with you.

[naromoreau]

Crime Does Pay

A Far Cry 5 fic Pairing: Sharky Boshaw/ Female Deputy Rating: Explicit Words: 5121 Also on AO3 Note:  Another super self indulgent oneshot of my now fave pair, because I have no life. Also big thanks to @shelbypnw (love you sweetheart!) and to the Awesome Far Cry Discord (YOINK you guys!) for pushing me to post this long ass thing. 

============== Summary:  In the aftermath of Faith's demise, the Resistance has a bit of solace and Rook is finally confronted with her feelings for the pyromaniac.

art by @colonelrogers

“So, honey, care to tell me when are you jumpin’ those bones?” Adelaide took a sip from her beer, sitting cross legged on the stool at the bar, while Mary May chuckled, cleaning a jug absentmindedly.

Rook flushed up to her ears, green eyes open wide and mouth hanging. “I-I dunno what you mean Addie,” she stuttered flashing glances to Mary May as if she was looking for a savior. Her pulse quickened slightly as she fiddled with the glass in her hand.

“O’cmon Dep, you ain’t that dense,” Mary May intervened, lips curled in a crooked smile. “Girl, you have it bad.”

She flicked her tongue across her lips, to gain some time, brow furrowed and boot tapping against the wooden panel of the bar. “Seriously you guys, I have no idea what you’re--” she was almost slurring, and she knew it. Damn .

“Stop that love,” Adelaide cut her words, waving a manicured hand in front of her, “I’m old enough to know you want to drag that pretty mouth of yours all over my idiot of a nephew.”

Rook spilled her drink gracelessly, eeking a faint yelp followed by a grunt as she hid her beet red face on her arms. “Oh for fucks sake, Adelaide!” she whispered agitatedly, lifting her head slightly, catching a glimpse of Sharky and Hurk standing by the pool table.

“Nah, honey, you no need to worry,” Adelaide said patting her head with one hand and taking a sip with the other. “I’m just sayin’ I don't get why you’re still here and he’s there, like don't you want to be spanked or somethin’?”

Rook grunted, straightening on her seat, trying not to shrink before Adelaide and Mary May intense gazes. “It’s not that simple,” she said taking a gulp of stale air, diverting her eyes to the dance floor, where Kim and Nick swirled at the rhythm of an upbeat tune. “I’m his best bud, and I can't do this to him, I mean -- I don't think he sees me like that--”

For the second time her words were cut short, but this time by the ringing laughter of Adelaide and Mary May combined.

“Oh hon, you’re a good deputy, but you’ve no idea ‘bout this,” Adelaide said bumping her shoulder with her own, “you should trust me and put to good use that cute outfit of yours.”

“I don’t see how--” Rook felt all the blood on her body pooling on her now scorching cheeks. She was completely sure she’d kept her crush for the pyromaniac in check, even if half the time her eyes swept his ass or the front of his pants, gaze cautiously hidden behind her sunglasses. God bless sunglasses. She would’ve known if what they said was truth, but in fact all his comments lead to believe that thought was a very far fetched scenario. “I don’t wanna embarrass myself,” she said taking a swig of her drink, putting it back on the counter with excessive force, the glass hitting wood with a hard click, “he’s definitely not into me.” Oh damn, was she bitter?

“Okay now,” Mary May chimed in, “that’s where you’re wrong. Haven’t you seen his goo-goo eyes whenever you’re around? He checks your ass at least four times each hour, and it’s a non-stop screwball when he talks to you.”

“And Mary here hasn’t been around us on the field, sweetheart,” Adelaide offered, with a wicked smile, “that’s just pathetic to see-- I mean, Charlemagne is not the most subtle individual around so I think even Hurk Jr. knows by now. Seriously honey, we all could be dead tomorrow, or-- are you waiting your chance with Johnny Boy?”

Rook cackled at the last sentence but it didn’t deter her mouth of going dry, the tip of her fingers numbed by a sudden rush of adrenaline. She shot a glance towards the pool table, eyes fixed on the familiar green hoodie for a second. Oh, she wanted him bad . A hot curl uncoiled between her thighs, her heart thumping under every inch of her skin.

“So?” Mary May said, elbows on the counter, staring at her with an amused expression, “what you waiting for?”

Rook cleared her throat. Fuck, just do it.

“Can I have some liquid courage first, Miss Fairgrave?” Rook asked, offering her empty beer mug to Mary May, but she took it, putting it aside and offering her two shots of tequila in return. No salt. No lime.

“Trust me dear, this is better.”

It was now or never. The semi-unplanned gathering was the perfect frame to get rid of that thorn on her side. She gulped the shots, one after the other, furrowing her brows and squinting. “‘Kay. I’m all geed up so bring it.”

She stood up, adjusting her black skirt that seemed determined to roll up her thighs. She heard Adelaide and Mary May laughing and clapping at her back, like fucking teenagers. Really . Nevermind. No one would notice. The music was loud and the alcohol had everybody focused on their own stuff.

She gave slow steps towards her target, where Sharky was apparently arguing with Hurk. It’d been a matter of events, one intertwined after the other and she couldn’t help to fall for him. He had the most beautiful smile she’d seen, and he was always so keen to follow her without question, it was heartwarming. And when he held his flamethrower bustling around her, laughing and yelling at the rhythm of peggie bullets, it made her feel alive. And, was she about to spill all those things in front of him? Her breath was shallow, and she felt sweat breaking on her palms. It was stupid really, now that she thought about it. What if Addie and May were wrong? But the rational part of her brain that screamed to back off, was muffled by alcohol and blood buzzing in her veins.

She was thinking that maybe it was just better to take her own ass back to where it came from, when Hurk lifted his face from his drink. She didn’t fail to notice how he digged Sharky in the ribs before she stepped in front of them, trying to pull her no bullshit facade out her ass.

“‘Sup Dep?” Hurk scratched his forehead beneath his banana, looking a bit high, “so are you sure Faith’s dead huh?”

“Pretty much Hurk, why?”

“I dunno, I was just thinkin’- it’s sad man, ‘cause she had this potential to be Mrs. Hurk Drubman Jr. y’know?, what a cute little thing she was,” Hurk said taking a long swig from his drink.

“I don’t think your mom would’ve approved that, Hurkie,” she said snorting, and quickly added, “maybe you should go there and ask her what she thinks, and bring me a beer on your way back, ‘kay?”

Hurk blinked for a second before perking up again. “‘Aight Dep, sure, sure, I got you babe, you gotta celebrate your victories!”

When he was gone, she closed the inches away from Sharky, ignoring the whirring sound in her ears, and her skin tingling, every breath more heavy than the last.

“Man I love Hurk but his screws are way loose,” she said, standing next to him, hopping on the pool table.

“None of that Shorty, he’s a fucking genius!,” he said as he took his beer bottle to his lips, and her hands tugged at the hem of her flannel to draw away her need to reach a hand and touch him. “‘Cuz’s been around a lot, and he kicks ass, he’s like-- like a one man army. Damn I wish I was more like him y’know?”

“What you talking about Boshaw? Your scrawny ass is the cornerstone of the resistance, man.” She chuckled, breathing in, breathing out, trying to quell her nervousness. “And by the way, never thanked you for saving my head from being blown up by peggies today, that was a swell move, man.”

“I got you shorty, I’m like--- I’m smooth like a ninja,” he said turning slightly with the same smirk he flashed everytime they blew up some outpost and it caused breath catch in her throat. “Gotta be your protector ‘cause your reflexes ain’t that good, but don’t feel bad, not everyone is like me y’know? I’m like-- I’m like the lovechild of Bruce Lee and James fucking Bond.”

Rook almost bent over with laughter. Damn she loved this man. Wait, what? She kicked the thought to the back of her mind. That path was just trouble and then some.

“Woah, woah easy there, you heathen,” she said hopping down the table with a fake scowl on her face. “My reflexes are much better than yours-- I’m a fucking officer with training and I’m gonna fucking prove it to you.”

Without giving it much thought and before her words could sink in his inebriated brain, she stood on her tiptoes and swooped his hat from his head, grasping it far behind her back.

“Hey! That ain’t fair, give it back, that’s theft!”

He extended a hand but she swatted it away, like if it was a pestering mosquito.

“Uh huh, you want it, you gotta take it from me,” she said shaking a dainty finger at him, leaning forward with a mischievous grin.

“Oh yeah? Well, bring it on chica.”

He tried to pounce at her by her right side, but she dodged him, giving a few steps back, away from the pool table. She giggled as he strode in her direction trying to clasp her arms, but she swirled around a table, bumping into a chair.

“You ain’t going free amigo! Hey Joey, handcuff the Dep!” He yelled in Hudson’s direction, but Joey rolled her eyes and shook her head, continuing her conversation with Pastor Jerome, unbothered.

“No one can help you, Boshaw,” she said with a smug grin, retreating into a small corridor out of everyone’s sight. She almost lost her footing, skirting around. Damn, the alcohol was kicking in.

He followed her close behind, but she didn’t relent. She jumped back when he tread to her, a half smile on his face. When her butt hit the wall, she understood her mistake.

“Got ya!” Sharky leaned forward, extending a hand in her direction. “Give it back, shorty, crime don’t pay.”

She exhaled a shuddery breath. He was so close her cheeks were flushed, heat that she didn’t know if came from the situation or the booze in her system, pooled in her belly.

“I said, you gotta take it from me,” she dared, boldly.

A question popped in his eyes, and she held up the cap and glasses in her hand. When he leaped forward, she swiftly hid her hand again. He slanted pressing both palms against the wall for support, her body now bracketed between his arms.

She was already dizzy from his scent, leathery and musky, a tinge of sandalwood and propane climbing up her nostrils. She moved a leg slightly upwards, to brush his inner thigh.

“Ah, Dep? You okay?” He wetted his lips, his words hiding an undeniable tremor.

She put his hat on her head, tilting her head up. Even with her high heeled boots she barely reached his chin. “More than fine,” she said placing her hands on his shoulders.

“Shit, I-- I think no more drinks for you tonight,” Sharky said, but his voice was lower and huskier that she’d ever heard before. He dipped his head an inch and stopped, lips slightly parted.

His breath was hot and moist, and she could feel it puffing against her lips. She flicked her tongue out, sweeping her lips, locking eyes with him. The dark hue of his usually bright blue eyes sent a shiver down her spine, a curl of need drifting down her groin, as his gaze fleeted from her lips, down her neck, up her eyes again.

“I’m not drunk, if that’s what you think Shark,” she said whispering practically into his lips.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he went down the last stretch, pressing his thin lips against her full ones. It was a timid kiss, nothing more than a chaste peck, before he pulled back.

“Jesus fuck Dep, you sure ‘bout this?” He asked, fanning her face with breathed words. “‘Cause I’m totally into this, but you’re like, you’re-- you’re ten football stadiums outta my league and I’ve been wantin’ to-- been wantin’ to do this from since fuck knows when.”

She gave him a lopsided smirk, and caught his lips with hers, sucking and nipping at his bottom one, pushing her tongue into his mouth, earning a soft groan from him. She felt him loosening up, his right hand now holding her tight at the small of her back, pulling her flushed up with him with an eagerness that made her moan. Wetness spread on her panties at the feel of his erection rubbing against her stomach, trembling as she thought of his calloused hands grazing her over sensitive skin, dipping into her. Fuck.

She felt her knees buckling and held onto the hard line of his shoulders as his tongue circled and pressed against every corner of her mouth, his ‘stache and beard tickling her chin and jaw.

“Ain’t you gonna bust our asses for public indecency po-po?” He said between gasps, his lips nibbling the rim of her jaw, sucking on the soft skin of her neck.

She smiled, lost in the tingling sensation of his tongue against her skin, craning her neck to allow him better access. And boy, oh boy, as much as she liked to be fucked against the wall by the pyromaniac of her dreams, they definitely needed a better spot.

“Mary’s office is-- is just right there,” she managed to stutter between sharp gasps, signaling to the door at their right.

He said nothing, pulling her into a tight embrace, ushering her inside the dark room. When the door closed behind them, he crashed her mouth with his and picked her up from the floor sliding his hands down to cup her ass. He squeezed gently making her gasp into his mouth as she felt each one of his fingers digging into her skin. Her parted thighs closed around his hips, skirt rolling up, as he moved her to the sturdy desk in the corner, placing her on top. His hard on rubbed against her panties and she grinded her hips, coaxing a growl from him that she swallowed eagerly, tongues tangled in a wet mess. He rolled his hips in response, cajoling a loud moan from her.

“All good Dep?” He smirked breaking an inch apart, his pupils blown wide with hunger of her, flaring up her own desire.

She didn’t remember to have wanted anyone as she wanted him, in that knee-weakening, panty-drenching, make-you-shiver all around kind of way.

“You ass.”

He gave her an eyebrow waggle that elicited a chuckle from deep within her belly. God, she was screwed. She fucking loved this idiot and he--. Don’t go there .  She finally surrendered her trophy, taking his cap off and her fingers skidded under his hoodie, digging into the lean muscles of his shoulders, licking his jaw, and pressing flat kisses in every inch of exposed flesh she could reach. She couldn’t believe how wet she was already, a sodden patch on her undies that was probably soaking the front of his pants as well. A pink flush bloomed on her cheeks at the thought. He unbuttoned her flannel, slowly, taking his time as he sucked her earlobe without stopping the infuriating roll of his hips. It was something she wasn’t expecting. Sharky jumping her bones like a rabbit in heat? Yeah. Sharky being all smooth and devouring her one course at a time? Definitely not.

“Fuck, Sharky,” she said huffing a moan and tugging at his chestnut hair, while he finally opened her shirt and unclipped her bra, stripping them off her.

He traced the rose tattoo on her upper left breast with flitting kisses, his beard adding to the pleasure of it. “Shit babe, you’re beautiful.” His raspy voice scrapped across her skin, flaring goosebumps all over her, and she tilted her head back, mewling when he closed his mouth around one nipple.

Her fingers carded in his hair as he sucked, tongue circling and lapping at it, while his hand groped her other breast, kneading it gently as his thumb rolled over her nipple. The pace of his tongue had her rolling her eyes, as he licked the valley between her breasts, mouth now moving and closing around her other hard nipple.

“Jesus fuck, shorty, you got such a nice pair,” he said squeezing both in his hands, before giving two hard sucks to her pert peaks, “could eat them all day long.”

“Ah! Glad you-- like them,” she whimpered.

He pulled back, taking off his shirt and hoodie, and she admired his flame tattoo going up his arm, joining to a skull on his right pec. She propped up on her elbows, humming when her fingers grazed the toned lines of his abs and chest, not too buffed but just enough. Just right .

He rolled up her skirt, bunching it up at her waist and hooked his thumbs at the sides of her black panties. Her cunt was already throbbing in anticipation and she bit her lip watching him getting rid off her underwear.

“Grab onto some shit babe,” he said kneeling in front of her, grinning with teeth at her, “Imma give you the Boshaw special.”

She barely had time to brace herself before he hoisted her legs up on his shoulders and his lips skimmed along her inner thighs, fingers stroking her damped folds, sliding along her slit.  

“Fuck Dep, you’re so fucking wet.” He was almost purring, one hand now palming on her mound to squeeze gently while the other spread her open, two fingers slipping easily inside her.

She shivered, spilling broken words, digging nails in his scalp and her thighs tensing around his head. He started thrusting his fingers in and out of her, controlled and steady movements building up her orgasm, lips and tongue teasing her vulva, nuzzling the patch of wiry hair.

“Man, look at ya, you’re perfect y’know?,” he said planting fat kisses along her inner thighs, lazily pumping his fingers into her, his other hand grabbing her hip, thumb drawing circles on her skin.

She grunted as any response. Her whole body was on fire, every last nerve raw and feeling his every move. He started scissoring as her breathing became ragged, chest going up and down as he now sucked on her labia. He stopped suddenly and she mewled in disappointment, before she felt his tongue at her entrance. He gave big, broad strokes along her slit, finally pushing his tongue all the way in, curling it, following the angle of her walls.

“Holy shit-- shit, man, ah!” She yelled and her voice sounded like a screech in her own ears. He was tearing her apart, one thrust at a time, her throat unable to emit more than cracked moans and whimpers. She writhed on the desk, her body now covered by a thin sheet of sweat.

She groped and squeezed her breasts, pinching and rolling her nipples, her hips bucking instinctively into his mouth.

“Holy fuck shorty, you put my porn collection to shame,” he said with a hoarse voice glancing at her, eyes fixed on her fingers teasing her nipples, his gaze almost searing her through and through.  

His cheeks were flushed as he finally closed his lips around her clit, making her holler louder than before. Fuck! His fingers filled her again, before her walls complained at the loss of his tongue, and he let out a moan that pulsated on her clit wrecking her completely.

Her head was spinning, heart thrumming in her ears as he sucked the nub, adding his tongue to the mix, alternating between light flicks and steady strokes. She was positively thrusting her hips forward. Her stomach tightened, the ache in her core now a pulsing beat she was closer to topple.

“Ah-- shit Shark, you’re amazing, ah, shit!”

She entwined tense fingers on his hair, pulling his face closer as his rhythm quickened, licking and sucking her more frantically. His teeth raked at the bundle of nerves, then sucking again and his fingers curled inside her hitting against that sweet spot. Her vision blurred and with a loud, keen cry she finally came on his face, gushing out all over him. When he stood up, licking his lips and cleaning his mouth with the heel of his hand and a cocky smile plastered on his face, she knew she needed him. All of him.

“Jesus Shark, I-- that was some good shit ,” she panted, the quivers still raking over her body, her legs feeling like jello.

“Told ya I wasn’t kidding, babe.” The look on his eyes was feral as he pulled her up, kissing her roughly, biting her lower lip, and pushing his tongue inside her mouth. She melted in his embrace, tasting her own salty tinge in his lips.

His bulging cock still trapped in his jeans rasped her over sensitive skin and she arched in his arms.

“Can you-- can you fuck me now?” she almost begged when they broke apart.

“Don’t need to tell me that twice, shorty.”

He unbuckled and unzipped his pants as fast as he could, and his cock sprang free in no time. Her walls clenched at the sight. It was thick and longer than she’d thought, the perfect curve at the tip sending a bolt of lust to her cunt.

He pressed his body against hers, rubbing his tip along her entrance, coating himself in her wetness. They kissed slow and thoroughly, his hands clasping her waist.

“Can we change scenery?” she whispered a scant inch away from his ear eliciting a gulp from him.

“What you got in mind?”

She guided him to sit in a padded chair, and he flopped down with a thud, his pants pooling at his ankles. She shimmied her hips, shucking off her creased skirt, bending over before him with her back turned.

“Now that's just cruel Dep,” he drawled.

She faced him, giggling as she straddled him, sitting high on his thighs, his hard dick pressed between them, his tip brushing below her navel.

“That's better,” Sharky said and she hummed in approval.

He cradled the nape of her neck, pulling her down for another kiss, as his other hand crept up her thigh grabbing a handful of her ass.

She closed her hand around his cock, her thumb smearing down the pre-cum beads from his tip. His tongue glided across her lips as she pumped him slowly, gulping down his moans and throaty grunts.

When she lifted her body off him supporting with a hand on his shoulder, he looked at her almost in awe and a tide of prideful lust beamed inside her. Yes, he wanted her, maybe as much as she wanted him. He lined him up to her entrance until his tip grazed her folds. Sharky bit his lower lip, his fingernails now almost scratching her skin. She sank down slowly, both staring down at his cock disappearing inside her to the hilt.

He let out a strangled moan, tilting his head back. “Oh shit.”

“Damn, Shark,” she whimpered.

He filled her just right, the stretch stinging slightly but not painful. She moaned rolling her hips, adjusting at his size.

“You okay babe?,” he asked between a low moan and a heavy grunt, clasping her hips and steadying her on his lap.

“Mhm,” she mumbled, closing her eyes for a second, reveling in the sensation of his erection throbbing inside her.

She started bouncing with a slow rhythm, savoring how he spread her wide every time she dropped down on his cock. Her toes curled, and a myriad of small gasps whiffed against his neck as she buried her face into his maddening scent. He shifted his position a little to angle into her, meeting her thrust for thrust, rocking his hips upwards.

“Oh, fuck Dep, you’re so fuckin’ tight, so fuckin’ tight--,” he said brushing her ear shell with moistened lips, “best fuck I’ve had, shit!”

“You’re- ah, you're not so bad yourself,” she said with a smirk, feeling the layers of his control tattering with every clench of her cunt around his cock.

He shot her a wolfish smile, a hand sliding to cup her breast, taking it to his mouth. She cried out when he sucked hard, his teeth grazing her nipple, and fingers massaging the surrounding swell.

Damn, he was good. With a strong hand on her ass cheek he guided her movements as she kept plunging onto him harder and faster. She arched into his touch when he snapped at her breasts and then anchored his hands at her bottom.

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!,” she yelped almost singing her curses when he grounded her down on his lap, licking and sucking at her collarbone.

“Shit Dep,” he moaned between airy grunts, “wanna-- wanna fuck you forever babe, you’re fucking delicious.”

She was barely listening at this point. The way he angled his hips to ram into her, knowing exactly where to hit was making her vision bleed to white, her cries probably loud enough to let anyone outside know what was going on there. His mouth seeked hers, kissing her softly, almost sweetly, in complete contradiction to their hard fucking. When they broke apart, foreheads touching, he looked at her breathless and longing. Her heart flitted in her chest, getting all fuzzy but she stomped the feeling down. Live the moment . And so she did, closing her eyes focusing in the rippling pleasure bursting inside her in wild flames.

“Look at me Dep,” he begged her, pressing his thumb flat against her clit, and she cooed while his hips jerked against hers. “Wanna see you come on me, shit- you’re more than beautiful.”

He circled her nub with steady movements and she leaned back supporting on his thighs for more leverage, pushing down harder and faster until it was too much.

“Oh, shit, shit, fuck Shark, holy shit! ” She crumbled forward, scratching his shoulders, walls clamping down on him and boy had he been right all along, she was hollering her lungs off.

He kissed her, pounding steadily still, whispering words she was too far gone to catch and held her tight as she rode the waves of her orgasm, her skin prickling with random bursts of pleasure flooding her like a tidal wave. His fingers now threaded in her hair, another hand spread wide on her back as he chased his own release, mouth wide open against her neck.

“Fuck babe, I’m close,-” he grunted.

Shit . Her mouth watered at the thought of having him all over her, so she rotated her hips when he wanted to stop, lifting her ass and dropping down, still managing to fuck him how she wanted.

“Please, Dep, I can’t--” he begged digging his fingers in the plump flesh of her hips.

When she felt the tremor in his body, she pulled off of him as he growled, letting him pump out his load, hot and thick, on her breasts.

He looked at her slack jawed, almost awestruck, as she slid a finger through his cum, tasting him with a moan. “Fuck shorty, you’re amazing,” he panted, milking the last spurts of his throbbing dick onto her. “I fucking love you-- shit, fucking love you.”

She felt her cheeks burning, as her brain fumbled with dignified responses for that scenario. It was probably just the afterglow talking, she decided, so she tried to compose herself and smiled at him.

“I love you too Shark,” she said, standing up and kissing his forehead, amicably enough she thought.

She quickly searched for her flannel and something to clean with, to try and make a hasty retreat, but she found nothing. She picked up his cap from the floor and grunted, making short use of her shirt, not yet deciding if framing it or burning it later.  

She heard the ruffle of his jeans and the clicking of his belt at her back, so she quickened her movements, putting on her panties and skirt.

“You mean it?” He grabbed her hips, turning her to face him.

If she could, she would’ve melted in a puddle of goo under his bright eyes, but she spur herself to not let her knees betray her. She placed the hat on him and rehearsed a confident smirk, one that she was far to feel as she stood in front of him, shirtless and emotionally wrecked.  

“Yeah, hon, best pals, right?” She gave a gentle tug to the bill of his cap, but he didn’t relent.

“C’mon Dep, y’know what I’m talking ‘bout,” he said and she trembled feeling his thumbs drawing circles on her hip bones, “‘cause I was dead serious.”

She gaped at him, as he towered over her and-- Maybe she didn’t get that right.

“I don’t understand Shark,” she said blinking as if she had been staring at the sun for too long.

“Jesus fuck Dep,” he bristled, “I’m tryna telling ya I love you!”

She blinked again, frozen in place and she felt his hands sliding off her. No, no don’t go.

“Wait, Shark!” She reached to hold his hand, and took his fingers to her mouth, kissing them softly. “I do-- fuck, by now saying I love you it’s an understatement.”

An all teeth smile broke on his face. “Shit, for real?”

“Real deal,” she said, tenderly caressing his face as she had dreamed so many times before. Fuck, it was finally true.

He smiled at her with unbridled love and kissed her, slowly, tracing the line of her jaw with his thumb.

“So, what now?” She asked looking around, when they parted, “I can’t leave in a jizz-covered shirt.”

“It’s cool, babe. I got you.”

He reached for his shirt and hoodie, giving her the latter. When she put it on, it almost covered the hem of her skirt.

“It looks like a fucking dress on me,” she complained.

“Nah, you look fine as hell, Mrs. Baeshaw.” He slid a hand around her waist, nuzzling her ear, unable to erase the foolish smile from his face.

She gave a short laugh. ”Pet names and all uh? You look awfully pleased with yourself Boshaw,” she said quirking a brow.

He chuckled, hugging her tightly. “Hell yeah, finally nailed it babe, you’re the fucking jackpot.”

[lightsandlostbells]

Skam Austin episode 5 reaction

one thing you can say about this show, it’s a great endorsement for smoothies and condoms

Episode 5

Clip 1 - Meg loves smoothies and Shay loves Meg

I find the setup of what happened after bowling, at the concert, so weird. Like Meg apparently confronted Marlon about meeting with Abby, and he denied it. It seems like it would have been so awkward! Too much tension! Did he have an alibi? I guess you don’t want to waste expensive concert tickets but it’d be so hard to relax and have a good time with that hanging over your head.

I don’t care much about text etiquette or teenage formalities but Marlon could at least ask Meg to the dance in person considering what a dick he’s been lately.

Shay looks very pretty in this scene. I wonder if that glow in her cheeks is for Megan...

Shay reacting to the smoothie: “Is this a protein shake?” Adorable, but lmao, do you not know what a smoothie is? When meeting with your friend meglovessmoothies?

I looked up the restaurant where the smoothie is from and they have the $7 smoothies Marlon had mentioned. But they also have $3-5 smoothies so he’s a dumbass. Just don’t get the expensive shit.

But also, here are some of the $7 smoothies:

MAGIC CARPET RIDE: cherry, pistachio, tahini, sumac, himalayan salt, banana, coconut water

BUSINESS TIME: cold-brewed espresso, banana, peanut butter, raw local honey, cacao, rice milk

GOLDEN TICKET: banana, almond butter, dates, hemp milk, cinnamon, golden paste (turmeric, ginger, cardamom, cinnamon, coconut oil, black pepper, himalayan salt)

I don’t know about you but I would try the shit out of those wild-ass hipster smoothies.

“I was supposed to go over to Tyler’s house, but I ended up watching Netflix on my phone for like six hours.” That sounds like the best possible way to spend a Friday, Shay.

If they’re making Shay Isak, but with a crush on Meg instead of Marlon, how is it going to work if she rats out Meg? Because Isak had the crush on Jonas, he was hurting Jonas by breaking up their relationship but he wasn’t spreading gossip about him. If Shay leaks gossip about Meg, her crush, that’s pretty cruel. Is it going to play out a different way?

Shay does an Isak-worthy eye narrowing at one point.

The ending conversation is so cute and Meg’s “Hey bitch” is my favorite moment from her so far. I hope the two of them hung out all afternoon.

Clip 2 - oh god Kelsey no

The idea of Daniel snapping a picture of Kelsey’s virgin bed with a blood stain, as his idea of a trophy, makes me sick. Oh my God, why. Do The Youth do that these days??? And you know Grace being all, “I’m sure he wouldn’t do that,” is more to soothe Kelsey’s nerves rather than because she believes he is truly not capable of it.

I think Grace being all “let’s not talk about Daniel’s dick” is because she’s very careful about sex and body image due to her bad experiences, if she has Noora’s history.

“He’s probably sharing details about me.” Kelsey, you don’t want to hear what Daniel might be saying about you. It’s so sad that she probably sees this as a positive for her. 

If I were Grace, I would be dragging Kelsey’s ass after school to get some emergency contraception. Plan B is at its most effective within 72 hours, which it still would have been when this clip aired; it’s less effective after 72 hours but it still works, and you can buy it over the counter. 

Actually it is kind of weird that none of the versions of Skam have brought up the option of emergency contraception. Especially in this version since Grace seems quite informed and proactive about birth control. 

“Wait … you didn’t use a condom?” “Well, I mean I brought it with me.” Holy shit, Kelsey, it’s not a talisman that wards off evil. You have to stick it on a dick for it to work.

Grace is the embodiment of that Shirley from Community gif. The lord is testing me.

At least Jo acknowledges that something could have gone wrong even if she’s glad it won’t interfere with their dance plans.

“Hi pretty” lacks some of the male entitlement of “Smile” but I appreciate Meg’s passive-aggressive response just the same.

In this and all versions, there’s something to be said about how boys expect girls to be cheerful for their benefit. Not just because they want their girlfriends to be legit happy, but because a smiling, nonstop happy girlfriend is easier to deal with than an upset girlfriend who might hold him accountable for his BS.

Goddammit, Daniel. Can Grace just punch this fucker in the balls already?

Look at his fucking sunglasses. What an asshole.

It’s kind of weird that Jo flirts so openly with Meg when any of her friends could be like hey, did you know this dude has a girlfriend? Or that someone has seen his “in a relationship” status on Facebook, or a picture of him and his girlfriend, etc.? But it’s a stretch in the original show, too. And I guess they didn’t care if he flirts with her if it comes with perks.

Clip 3 - Meg and Marlon fight again

You can just tell that Meg wishes she were shopping with her girls rather than having to deal with her mans.

Marlon don’t you dare try it with that Even Bech Næsheim cheek kiss and nose rub. I’m not saying Even owns the rights or anything, you’re just banned from doing it unless you can treat your SO with respect.

Megan looks like she flinched when Marlon rubs his nose on her arm.

I mean, Marlon is right in that I wouldn’t want my SO to have to call my parents to confirm my whereabouts, but that’s beside the point when he is lying out of his ass.

“I wish you could stop being so insecure all the time.” Oh fuck off. You put her down to her face not only when the two of you are alone but in front of your friends, who sometimes join in on teasing her, you belittle or dismiss her interests and activities, you bail on plans randomly, and you tell obvious lies. Even without the shady business with Abby, he’s doing so much to make her insecure just from the way he treats her and speaks to her.

Lmao, not to downplay the seriousness of this scene but their relationship is like every overdramatic teenage romance where the couple was always fighting in the halls on Monday and then making out against your locker on Tuesday. A constant cycle of arguments and OTT affection.

Him not getting off her car is so annoying and I would not have blamed her had she driven away the second he got down. Or even before that.

Do any of those other students not notice what’s going on with the screaming match? Or do they not care? Or are there a bunch of randos out of frame watching it go down?

I ended up glad they did the same technique as with Eva/Jonas of not hearing their conversation once he gets in the car, because really the words don’t even matter. It’s just a cycle of fighting and making up, lather, rinse, repeat. I like that they’re in the car which gives them a physical barrier and makes the audience feel more like outsiders. The music was pretty but kinda depressing and ominous which - yeah, sums it up.

Clip 4 - Is that the Fish Under the Sea Dance?

This musical performance is gorgeous but what school has the orchestra perform at a dance?  Isn’t it unfair to the kids in orchestra that they can’t just enjoy the dance? Unless they only perform for part of the night.

Props to the singer and her fantastic mermaid scale dress, though.

I see you, Poonam. I wish they’d have more sporadic appearances from her. She had more of a distinct personality than the theater kids and seems less like she should totally fade into the background.

Can Marlon ever get his ass somewhere on time? He keeps running late or ditching her for important events.

I love Josefina’s light-up hair. Give us the tutorial on that.

Kelsey did not send Daniel nudes which is definitely for the best, not just to preserve her dignity, but because teens have gotten in legal trouble for sending explicit pictures of themselves. It’s a misdemeanor for minors in Texas.

Her justifications for Daniel not going with her to the dance are depressing, jeez. She seems like the youngest Vilde of them all.

“Everyone is here with friends so it would have been very weird” cue three boy-girl pairs walking into frame.

It’s more on the nose to have Marlon texting right as Zoya talks about if someone wants to be with you they’ll make time to be with you, rather than to have Zoya give her boy advice in a separate scene, but at least they made the connection.

Kelsey: “Zoya, I don’t know how much you know about boys and dating…” Kelsey, one episode earlier: “It was like he went down on me in my mouth.”

Zoya goes to fix the Kelsey situation, which is nice, because while the message was sorely needed, the delivery could have been a little kinder.

Despite being Kelsey’s BFF and being a great cheerleader for her awkward dancing, Jo doesn’t seem to know how to be there for Kelsey in this Daniel situation. She’s been egging it on and enjoying it secondhand while ignoring the warning signs.

Did they mean to have Megan wearing black and Abby in white, or was that just a coincidence?

Is Abby’s friend Natalie on nunchucks?

I wish Julie would direct Abby to play the role less like the snotty queen bee from a generic teen movie. I know Ingrid wasn’t always the nicest person but Abby seems like a textbook mean girl trope (maybe just because American media is over-saturated with those), and even knowing their history I don’t get how she and Megan could’ve been friends. 

It’s not a high school dance until someone is crying outside the building and in the bathroom (which I’m guessing Kelsey has covered).

The reactions from the P-Chris fans hoping Jo would be a better guy this time around were pretty funny, no offense to any P-Chris fans. To be fair, he did seem to have more of a personalized approach to Megan, and I was kinda wondering if maybe Julie would swing more toward P-Jo/Meg this time around as a consolation prize for P-Chris/Eva not being endgame, but whoops, guess not.

I will give Penetrator Jo some credit, he does a decent job of seeming like a friendly, flirty, genuinely interested guy. By “some credit” I mean that were I an emotionally fraught teenage girl and not a TV viewer watching this scenario play out for the fifth time, I would probably fall for his caring and concerned schtick, not credit for him behaving this way, to be clear. Also while he’s laying it on thick, Megan clearly kisses him first.

Boy Jo revealed to be jackass with “why do you always lead me on like that” as if “don’t be a cocktease” in his first appearance wasn’t enough of a clue. Or you know, him having a girlfriend.

Not to mention adding “It’s real annoying” and then lurching into his happy boyfriend mode for Cleo without a hitch. This slick little shit.

This is random but with the aquatic theme of the dance, the first Cleo I thought of was Cleo the fish from Disney’s Pinocchio.

Jo all “We’re just talking” and being sure to add that Megan has a boyfriend. And hey babe, why don’t you have a girl-to-girl heart-to-heart with her? I’ll leave the two of you alone, see, I have nothing to hide, she doesn’t have anything incriminating to tell you.

I like the detail of Cleo calling Megan “Maggie” since it’s a reminder that yeah, she’s a stranger, this is a sweet but impersonal gesture, and there’s a lot she doesn’t know about the situation.

I know people have gotten on all the Evas for not going up to Vildes as they’re leaving the party (I think Italian Eva is the only one who talks to her), but I don’t think you can be too hard on Eva/Meg in this scenario. She’s thinking she’s been betrayed by her boyfriend and that her relationship is possibly over, the other dude who has been flirting with her has a girlfriend, and she just cheated. She’s too drained to deal with much else.

The moment of Meg and Marlon talking on their phones while looking at each other was pure cheesy teen drama and I kinda dug it. I didn’t care for the music choice, though - the song isn’t bad but it fit weirdly with the scene, like when Meg said, “My feet hurt,” and then the lyrics were immediately, “And it hurts like helllll,” lmao. Felt awkward.

Marlon has a lot to do to get on my good side but giving his ugly shoes to Meg and carrying her heels was a cute gesture.

Aha, Marlon was selling Adderall to Abby! Overall I think that’s a good change from him smoking weed as I’m pretty sure selling Adderall would have more severe consequences and it also fits with the theeeeeemes of pressure to succeed.

Also Meg seems surprised that Abby would use Adderall. This is far more incriminating to Abby as well, since she’s not just being a bystander to her brother’s weed transactions. Though probably nothing will come of that.

Meg being like “So you’re a drug dealer?” and Marlon being all, I’m not a drug dealer, I don’t hang out on street corners selling to random people - LMAO. Bro, you sell drugs, you’re a drug dealer. I think it’s probably an accurate teenage mindset, though. Middle-class white boy selling his prescription medicine to his classmates - doesn’t fit the shady connotations in his head, therefore can’t be a drug dealer.

So on the one hand, not to condone teenage drug dealing, but I can completely get how selling your meds would be a more tempting and satisfying option to earn some cash rather than say, getting a minimum wage job at McDonald’s or something like that. You would make more money with much less time working. And I get that Marlon would want to have some financial independence from his parents. But I’m not a huge fan of Marlon’s motivation being just that his parents don’t understand his music. It’s not that I think it couldn’t happen, it’s that it seems like, well … a TV cliche? Maybe it’s just one of those things I’ve seen so much of in teen media, the kid who loves music/art/dance/acting/creative pursuit and the parents who want them to take a more stable path in life. 

I kind of wish Marlon had a more topically relevant motivation for selling drugs. His family is struggling financially and he needs the money. College tuition is utterly ridiculous in this country so he’s trying to save up. I guess it doesn’t have to be that serious, but IDK. Like I said, feels a bit cliche.

General Comments:

This week’s best Facebook comment:

American culture truly is having your soundcloud boyfriend dealing adderall

Also at least one person accidentally wrote “Marlon” as “Melon” and I find that hilarious. GET IT TOGETHER, MELON.

The whole shit with the Instagram influencers posting about Skam Austin is so obnoxious and fake. Remember when original Skam received little to no traditional promotion because nothing word turn off teenagers than their parents telling them about this new show that was out? The stuff with the influencers is completely opposed to that strategy. It’s an inauthentic approach when Skam’s appeal lies heavily in its authenticity.

There’s also something to be said about whether this show is reaching teenagers, because quite a few of the newbies appear to be older, but that was inevitable considering Facebook’s losing teenage users and skewing older.

They need to rein in Kelsey a bit. I think the actress has potential, but they’re making her seem like a character who should be on a bad Disney Channel or Nickelodeon sitcom accompanied by a laugh track, not a real person. 

I love seeing the Skam Austin newbies ask where they can watch Skam and the OG stans rush in with 10,000 links. 

They didn’t post anything on Saturday, not even texts. Are they going to go on hiatus? This is where the break was in the OG S1, plus it’s episode 5 out of a probable 10 (since they cut the cabin episode). I think it’d be a bad idea to take a break now since they don’t want to lose momentum.

[worksofphiction]

prompt; single dad phil who is too attached to his one year old to see the obvious attempts of his new housekeeper to flirt with him. cue phil making airplane noises while feeding,cooing,cuddling and baby lester sleeping,fist in mouth,on her daddy's chest as he snores on the couch, glasses askew and dan the housekeeper with alternator motives snapping creepshots he can't help. very very obsessive and tunnel visioned young dad phil. Hopelessly in love pathetic admirer and housekeeper dan.

For the Love of Scarlett Lester

Read on Ao3!

Summary: Phil has always believed that not all mistakes led to regrets. And every morning, for the past 10 months, he has stared that belief in the face. Scarlett Lester was born on January 1st and she is the most beautiful human being that has ever crawled the earth.Single Dad, Phil Lester is completely obsessed with his baby girl and isn’t able to recognize the crush his housekeeper Dan has on him. Will Dan be able to prove that he is good enough for not only Phil, but also his daughter?Genre: Fluff, Domestic FluffWord Count: 15,123Reading Time: 00:55:26Disclaimer: Characters are works of fiction and no copyright infringement is intended. I do not own Dan or Phil and as far as I know, this never happened.

(I’m sorry that this took so long to write! I haven’t had a moment to myself in a while to concentrate. But here you are, Anonymous! I got a little carried away, I know…but it’s cute. I promise.)

Phil has always believed that not all mistakes led to regrets. And every morning, for the past 10 months, he has stared that belief in the face. Scarlett Lester was born on January 1st and she was the most beautiful human being that has ever crawled the earth. She was named after her mother, a beautiful American girl that had brown hair, the color of bacon that had just begun to sizzle and eyes that outblued even his own. The summer was hot last year and Phil was casually strolling through downtown Manchester when he crashed into a woman running high speed towards a cafe where she had apparently left her credit card. She was a whole ocean away from her family and was going to be there for the entire summer, so losing her credit card was the last thing she needed to happen. Phil rubbed his head and helped her up, asking her what the matter was, only to then run with her - just in case things went south. Sure enough, the restaurant had her card and Phil helped her dust off the beautiful bag she had been carrying. Phil Lester was a dork, to say the least. He didn’t have much luck with the ladies or the lads. He just kind of existed and very rarely, something lucky would happen and Phil would end up in a situation most would call serendipitous. The girl shook his hand and told him that her name was Scarlett, passing a smile in Phil’s direction. Their eyes met and suddenly, they were spending the afternoon together talking about the places they had been in life. Phil always imagined that the love of his life would come into his life with a crash, but he didn’t expect it to run so smoothly. It was almost like it was too good to be true. And in fact, it was. After casually seeing Scarlett for about a month, she showed up at his door with her head in her hands. Phil guided her inside and rubbed her back until she dug something small and plastic from the bag that had caught Phil’s eye in the very beginning.A pregnancy test. Scarlett was pregnant and the baby was definitely Phil’s. Phil’s gut reaction told him that this was karma. That this is what you get when you sleep with someone and not triple double check that they have taken their birth control pills consistently. But of course, the thing they had in common had to be their forgetfulness and isn’t it funny how that one flaw in two people could create such a mess? But another thing Phil believed, was that once something happened, it couldn’t unhappen. So he swallowed his fear and comforted the young girl, talking her off a mountain of doubt. She explained, once she could breathe, that she was against abortion and that she couldn’t keep the baby herself. Phil’s gut twinged with sadness because they would make a wonderful couple. But once he thought about it, she was young and he barely knew her. Sure, a few conversations over dinner and a couple of eventful dates might show chemistry, but that didn’t stand as a solid foundation for a marriage or a parental situation. So after Scarlett called her parents she came to Phil a few weeks later bearing a choice. Phil’s eyes flicked down to the girls growing stomach and took the ultrasound from the shaking girl’s hand. She started explaining the adoption process and he zoned out completely as he looked at the tiny little pea sized speck that seemed to be staring back at him from the paper. “I’ll take her.” His words jumped from his mouth like a frog from a sinking lily pad. He couldn’t give up this child that had dropped into his life so unexpectedly. This girl was lost and scared and as Phil stared at the girl in front of him, he decided he didn’t want to do that to a child that hadn’t even been born.Scarlett tried to explain that the adoption process would be easy and that Phil shouldn’t add more to his simple life. She claimed he might not be ready and that this was a huge step for a single man to make, but Phil didn’t care. He was staring down at the photo in his hand with a smile on his face. Phil was a loner, always had been, and he felt in his bones that this was the right thing to do. That this little pea could change his life into something that mattered. After all, he was nearly 24 and hadn’t found a mate. People of 24 had kids all the time. This was a sign. He would be stupid not to take it. He pulled Scarlett in for a hug and told her that she should take some deep breaths and that he would adopt the baby directly. It would make her job easier and then she could come see the child whenever she wanted, even after she traveled back to her hometown in America. It was four in the morning when he got the call. He was wide awake though, a feeling of nausea coursing through his restless body. The baby was coming and in less than a day, he would be a father. The baby girl was born in America, Scarlett’s family insisting they have the child in their hometown surrounded by the people she cared about. Phil wished that he could be there but he didn’t know her family well enough and as the older foreign guy who knocked their 21-year-old up, he didn’t really feel like he was welcome anyway. But a week after the delivery, he was to meet Scarlett and their child at the airport and no matter how many times he fixed his collar, it still didn’t look good enough for the first time he met his baby girl. He would soon learn that nothing would be good enough for his baby girl and that wouldn’t change as she grew older. Their meeting was short and if Phil was being honest, he couldn’t even recall what Scarlett had said to him while she was there. She mentioned something about visiting on their child’s first birthday if she could manage to make the money. Just to check up on the baby she had just brought into the world. She handed him the suitcase that had all of their child’s belongings so far and hugged Phil sadly. She didn’t look so remorseful about leaving their child and Phil thought she should’ve been. He couldn’t do what she was doing, but he supposed that’s why he wasn’t. He picked up the baby’s carriage and peered down at the sleeping child. A wave of nervousness flooded over him but he couldn’t stop smiling down at his beautiful baby girl to acknowledge the fact that he had no idea how to care for a child. But no parent did and over time, he learned. He heard less and less from Scarlett as she faded from his life, only to be referenced when Phil explained how his little baby girl had come to be. The story was hardly romantic and Phil preferred it that way. Baby Scarlett didn’t need an origin story. She just needed Phil, and Phil needed her. Now, 10 months later, the baby girl was babbling to Phil as he played with her little toes. It was past supper time and Phil had eaten his own meal of pasta while he fed Scarlett her mashed bananas. These had been her favorite since the moment he switched her from bottles. Phil hated bananas but he would buy them every single day if it was for Scarlett. Phil was lucky that his Youtube channel was going well. He mainly did vlogs and before he had a child, he would vlog his daily adventures and do little live shows for his fans. It paid the bills and it was rather lucrative at times. It depended on how productive Phil was about making his videos and doing interesting things. But after Scarlett was born, Phil began to slowly incorporate her into his vlogs. At first, he thought that maybe she would ruin his channel - and to be honest, Phil didn’t care. If people didn’t like her, then he didn’t want anything to do with the channel in the first place. But shockingly, his support only grew and he suddenly, as if it were overnight, had become an icon for single dads everywhere. Phil and Scarlett were Youtube’s most beloved vlogging channel and Phil couldn’t be happier. He didn’t have to change a single thing. He would just make sure the camera was on when he was going about daily life. He would film Scarlett and show the world what he saw when he looked at her. Pure beauty and love. Of course, the downside with being so busy and working from home is that Phil didn’t have a ton of friends. He wasn’t a very social Youtuber and didn’t really fit into any of the clicks that existed throughout the community. Not to mention, having a kid kind of limits the ability to go out and hang with people of his own age. He was very very lucky that he received a message from a girl named Louise who was going through a similar problem. She was Youtuber with a child named Darcy and was expecting another within the next couple of months. She often found herself getting lonely and not having the right kind of friends to keep up with her lifestyle. When she messaged Phil, it was simply to tell him that she admired his courage of being a single parent and that she used him as an inspiration herself when tackling the struggles of being a single mother. Phil messaged her back after a particularly hard week of solitude and kind of went out on a limb, asking if she and her daughter would want to come over and have dinner. Louise complied and suddenly, a friendship was born. Turns out they lived close and it was easy to see that Darcy fell deeply in love with Scarlett. She claimed that she “always wanted a baby sister” and now she could finally have one. One of the best things about having a friend with a child and the same interests was her ability to make Phil’s life easier with just one suggestion. Phil’s biggest problem, always had been, was picking up after himself and Scarlett. Phil was often distracted with his own life and his own daughter that he forgot to pick up his apartment. Things were a mess nearly all the time because he just didn’t have the energy after he put the baby to bed to clean up his flat. He would tell himself - and Louise - that he would clean it up “tomorrow” or “this weekend” only to completely ignore the goal and fall asleep with Scarlett on his chest instead. It was nearing winter when Louise finally said something. “Philly, do you ever intend on picking up your lounge?” She stepped over some of the baby clothes that were lying on the floor. “Does Scarlett even fit this anymore?” She held up one of the first onesies that Scarlett had ever worn. In fact, she arrived in that one. Phil carefully took the carriage back to his flat and when he finally arrived there, he took the sleeping child from her comfortable spot. Scooping her into his arms, he cradled the one-week-old child and his heart melted. The little pink onesie looked too big on her tiny curled body, able to be supported by just one of his massive hands. Phil hummed softly as the baby hiccuped into his ear, only to fall back asleep on Phil’s shoulder. He would never forget that moment, for that was when he fell in love with his daughter. His daughter in the little pink onesie. He couldn’t give it up… “Phil!” Louise snapped him out of the trance he had fallen into, staring at the object in question. He had this stupid grin on his face that he would make when he thought about how adorable Scarlett was. It was nap time for his baby and Darcy was with her dad, so this was generally the only time the two friends had to talk without the distraction of a child. But it seemed that Phil could get distracted anyway and Louise always joked about how his head was 90% Scarlett and only 10% everything else. “I hate to tell you this, Phil, but you need to clean your apartment. It’s a little gross,” she told him, his eyebrows going up with sympathy. He knew she was right. He just…didn’t have the time. Or something. Maybe he just hated cleaning. But when Scarlett was awake, he gave her his full attention, and when she was asleep, he was so exhausted that cleaning sounded like a nightmare. “I know, I’m sorry. I just don’t have time,” Phil sighed, glancing at the state of his apartment. Louise had a point. It was pretty gross. “Being untidy isn’t a problem but I worry about Scarlett, Phil. She’s at the age where she wants to put everything in her mouth. You can’t have this on the floor,” Louise referenced the water bottle cap that was lying haphazardly on the ground by her feet. At the mention of his child, Phil nodded and sat down, putting his head in his hands. Maybe months ago, he could have cleaned everything during one nap time. But now? Now the mess had only grown and he couldn’t tackle it by himself. Not if he wanted to stay sane. Not to mention, every day was a day closer to Scarlett’s first birthday. And that was the day her American mother was due to visit. His place couldn’t look like this. Not for that. “What do I do?” Phil asked, knowing that this was a problem and that he should probably just suck it up. Louise looked at him and nodded, almost like she expected this question. She dug around in her purse for something, pulling out a business card between her index finger and thumb and handing it to Phil. “I think maybe you should call these guys,” she suggested as Phil took the piece of cardstock and inspected its black lettering. “It’s a little expensive but it’s worth it. They’ll come organize some of this stuff for you. Not to mention, they have this service where they’ll send someone every week. That seems right up your alley.” Phil looked up at Louise with a cautious glance. Could he really trust these people? “I promise, Phil, it’s safe. I used it when Darcy was about 15 months old. She refused to take naps and our house paid the price,” she stood and slung her purse over her shoulder. “I know it’s hard. I get it. Cleaning is the first thing I cross off my list of things to do when I’m overwhelmed. But if it gets this bad, then maybe you need to stop hoping you’ll get the inspiration. Just pay someone else to do it.” She chuckled a little. She knew that Phil wasn’t exactly poor. He was just supporting the two of them and his Youtube channel wasn’t exactly a lower class job. “Plus, another great thing about this company, is that they hire young people that need part time jobs to do it. So most of them are college kids that are hardworking and looking for extra cash. They’ll have no problem finding someone for you.” Phil nodded and he stood up as well. It was nearing the end of their scheduled lunch and Scarlett was going to wake up any moment. Louise was out the door soon after the suggestion and Phil picked up his cell phone. He typed in the numbers that sat neatly at the bottom of the white business card and waited for the phone to ring on the other side. - It had been a pretty good week for Dan Howell. He had aced all his exams and he had officially been signed onto this part time gig where he could clean houses for extra cash. Dan had been living with his parents since he was 19 and this year, he decided to go back to school at Manchester University. He had taken a year out for his own personal crisis but without much motivation to do anything else, he re-enrolled and now he needed to pay rent. He was 20 and had just started his second year of University which was enough of an embarrassment. He didn’t need failure to pay rent on his list of problems. So when a friend suggested this service, he was on it straight away. He looked over the terms of the agreement and he was genuinely excited to work for them. The service was quite unique. Essentially, the company gets calls from people in need of a cleaning service, whether that meant picking up and organizing things or dusting and mopping. Dan had a choice between joining their standard cleaning crew or their premium. The standard cleaning crew went to houses on an on-call basis. When people needed a straightening up, they called the service and they were in and out in a day. It was cheap and easy, so it was no wonder people called so often. The premium service was totally different, however. If a person called and asked for a premium package, that meant they needed someone multiple times a week. In this case, a crew member was assigned to that house and they would be the residential cleaning person until no longer needed. They generally got paid more but it was certainly more of a time commitment. Dan didn’t have many friends and he wasn’t really into sports or extracurriculars. So when given the choice between the two crews, he chose the second and was now patiently waiting for the next caller that needed the service. The woman he signed up with on the phone told him that he was next in line and that someone would probably call within the next few days. Dan was happy to hear that and was kind of excited to see where he would be spending a few hours a week cleaning. The call came when he was swinging his feet off a wall on his college campus. He had stopped there to eat lunch but when he dug through his backpack, it turned out that he had forgotten his lunch after all. But his sour mood was flipped when he got his first assignment and he hopped off the wall immediately to start pacing as he talked to his management. The woman was going to email him the information he needed - the address, short details of the job, the hours, and he was to go over on Friday to meet the client. Ultimately, the client would decide what the final hours would be and he would supply Dan with the right cleaning supplies for the job. “Thank you so much,” Dan said to the woman on the other side of the line, hanging up and checking his email immediately. Sure enough, an email with an address was sitting pretty in his inbox and his short term career that would keep him just busy enough to forget how boring his life could be, was about to begin. He didn’t think he needed to dress up exactly, he was just going over to clean someone’s house for God’s sake, but that didn’t stop him from changing three times in front of his mirror that morning. He didn’t even know why he was nervous. He didn’t want whoever this person was to think that he was going to slack off and waste their money. He wanted to do a good job, probably because this was his first real job and partly because he wanted to prove something to himself. He was finally getting his life together. He took the bus to the Manchester flat that he was supposed to arrive at. He was an hour ahead of schedule but he didn’t want to risk some sort of mistake that could delay his arrival. While sitting on the bus, he thought briefly about the year out of Uni he had taken. When he originally told his parents that he wanted to drop out of Law School, they were upset, to say the least. They were loving, but they certainly had something to say when he told them he didn’t think that school was for him. Finally, after weeks of berating, he got through to them and they told him he could take a single year out and see where it led. And he had. He lived at home and did nothing, which gave him time to reflect on his life as a whole. His parents had given up the fight but Dan could tell they were itching to kick him out of the house and into the world. Just because he didn’t move out, didn’t mean he didn’t grow up. He spent a lot of time thinking and growing, but with no direction, he only came back to the conclusion that he had to go back to school. Not for law of course, but something liberal and possibly more fun. So he sent the University an email, and just like that, he was enrolled again. Starting classes in the fall. Of course, he didn’t want to live in the dorms, so he bought a flat with his savings and started searching for a job. One of the worst things about living at home, however, something he never really considered being a problem, was how lonely things got. Most people from Dan’s home town had gone off to University and then got jobs in those cities or found another place to live. This left Dan with little friends and not many people to talk to. No problem. Dan loved to be alone. He wasn’t even someone who ever had too many friends. But Dan was soon realizing that maybe it wasn’t just friends he wanted. He wanted someone he could cherish and relate to on more than a friendly level. He wanted a family and a dog and someone he could share things with one day. His brother never really cared for the whole “big happy family” image and it was time that Dan found something that could fill that hole. And here he was, on a bus in Manchester, going over to some person’s house who needed an extra hand cleaning up. It wasn’t exactly the perfect solution to his problem, but it was a step. Cleaning meant money, money meant rent, rent meant school and school meant friends. Yeah. This would work. So when the bus stopped only blocks away from the place he needed to be, he hopped off and checked the time. Still an hour early. The light traffic had only delayed him two minutes and he sighed. He couldn’t show up early. That would be unprofessional. He looked around the block and then spotted a green logo that he was all too familiar with. Starbucks. He shuffled across the street and into the comfortable building, idling in line behind at least 15 other people. Perfect. This would kill some time. It was then that he got an idea. Why not make a good impression? Hopefully, the person who hired him liked coffee. When he reached the front of the queue, he decided on his drinks of choice. “Two Caramel Macchiatos please,” Dan ordered, pulling out a wrinkled ten from his pocket. The lady began to make his drinks, slowly, which Dan secretly appreciated, and then handed them over the counter. Dan checked the clock. 20 minutes. That was the perfect amount of early, he thought, as he left the Starbucks and headed for the address he needed to be at. Finally, he arrived outside of the apartment, totally out of breath. He had to climb a few flights of stairs to get to this door and he hoped the person on the other side could appreciate that. Dan was not into exercise. Not even slightly. He hesitated, fixed his shirt, tucked one of the coffees under his wing and then hovered his fist over the door. Here goes nothing. Knock, knock, knock. There were an agonizing 23 seconds before someone fiddled with the lock on the other side. Dan straightened himself as best he could while he waited for the person, who seemed to be struggling, to open the door. Just before Dan thought the person on the other side was actually stuck, the lock clicked and the door began to part. And that’s when Dan’s stomach fell to his feet. The person he was staring at, was not just a middle aged man with a beer gut and bald spot as he kind of expected. This man was probably the closest thing Dan had ever seen to Godly. His black hair was a little ruffled and he clearly hadn’t slept well in a few nights, his eyes sinking in only slightly, but he had the most beautiful blue eyes Dan had ever seen. They pierced his own brown ones as they looked him up and down. Usually, Dan would find this rude, however, he would be a hypocrite if he accused this man because he was giving him a good once over as well. His blue shirt seemed purposeful to match his sparkling eyes and it seemed his jeans had faded. Dan wondered when the last time this man went shopping was and whether he actually cared. Dan hoped he hadn’t stared for too long, his eyes wandering back up to the man’s blue ones, waiting for him to say something. It seems he had gotten lost in thought as well and he startled Dan a bit with a little cough. “Wow. You really are young,” the man opened with, blinking a couple times as he backed up and away from the door. Dan didn’t know what he meant by that, but he decided not to let it offend him. He needed this job. If the guy thought he looked young, fine. That’s when the door swung open and the black haired boy nodded him inside. “Thanks,” Dan mumbled as he kept his eyes glued to the floor. He didn’t want to be rude, so he waited for the man to close the door and then walk in front of him and into the house first. “I-I…brought you some coffee.” The man paused and turned slightly towards Dan as they walked, glancing at the cup in Dan’s left hand. “Oh…you didn’t have to. I have a coffee machine here, in fact, I was going to ask if you-” “It’s a Caramel Macchiato,” Dan interrupted, cutting off the older man’s rambling. He stopped talking and blinked a few more times at the drink, taking it and sipping. “That’s amazing.” He grinned after tasting it and nodding. “Have you never had a Caramel Macchiato before?” Dan asked, surprised. This guy lived across the street from a Starbucks. That had to be a crime. But the man let out a hearty, but quiet, laugh. “Oh no no. I have, I have.” He took another sip. “It’s amazing that you knew it was my favorite.” Dan kind of blushed, happy that he could deliver this man something that he wanted. Even if he didn’t ask. That made him feel good. Like maybe this was a sign. “I’m sorry, I never introduced myself,” the man said after a silent moment. He put down the coffee and reached for Dan’s hand. “I’m Phil Lester. Thank you for coming.” “Dan,” He said only his first name, not sure why he would need to divulge his personal information to a stranger. Dan was cleaning Phil’s house, so knowing his last name seemed appropriate, but Phil wasn’t cleaning Dan’s apartment. So it shouldn’t matter. “Nice to meet you.” It was then that Dan remembered what he was doing here. He wasn’t just here to make small talk with some beautiful boy in this tiny kitchen. He was here to discuss his new employment. That was when Dan noticed. He glanced around the tiny kitchen and something in his brain clicked. This man was clearly a mess. His kitchen looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in years. There were things of all shapes and sizes on the counter. Phil’s coffee cup was sitting in the only free space that there was. And holy hell, if this guy’s kitchen looked like this, he didn’t even want to think about his lounge. It seemed that Phil noticed that Dan was now taking in his surroundings and it was almost like his face dropped and he looked a tad ashamed. “I know…I know…” Phil muttered. “This is why you’re here.” He gestured to the room and slumped, his hip hitting the counter where he was standing. To most people, this would look like a nightmare. Something that nobody would want to tackle. But Dan, he liked to organize, especially when it wasn’t his stuff. He laughed a little at himself in his head, kind of getting excited to clean up this person’s household. He was a curious guy and he secretly wondered if there was anything fun he’d be able to piece together while he went through Phil’s things. Then it occurred to him that maybe it wasn’t just Phil. Maybe there was someone else living here too. Someone just as messy. Wow, Dan really had his work cut out for him. “I can give you the tour if you’d like?” Phil said, his eyebrows up in anticipation. It was clear that he wasn’t really much for human interaction either. Dan was sort of relieved because this meant there wouldn’t be much pressure when he came over to help out. “But please do your best to be quiet. Scarlett is napping.” Ah, Scarlett. Perhaps that was this man’s girlfriend? Or maybe his wife…? Phil led Dan down the hallway and into the lounge where Dan was stepping over items of clothing. There wasn’t really a place to stand and if he was being honest, it was worse than the kitchen. There were things everywhere. And only a tiny patch of carpet over by the couch. Right next to the… What was that? Dan stepped closer as Phil watched and he realized that what he was staring at was a little swing. One for a baby. Dan glanced over at Phil who gave him no reaction, seeing nothing wrong with the objects littering his living room. Did Scarlett and Phil use to have a baby? Was that why Phil needed help cleaning? Was he afraid to touch any of the child’s stuff? It was not Dan’s job to ask questions, so he just shrugged and nodded. Thankfully, Phil spoke then. “So, for the first couple weeks, it would be great if you could come three times a week.” He looked around. “I kind of have a deadline. I need everything to be clean by the beginning of the new year. January first. You think that’s possible?” Dan nodded. Of course, that was possible. It was nearing the end of November and he was sure he could get this all clean by then. “So I’m thinking three hours a day? Monday, Wednesday, and Friday?” Phil proposed, cocking his head. “Unless you have other things to do on those days in which you can choose which-” “Sounds good,” Dan stumbled out, smiling and nodding. “No problem.” “Great!” Phil exclaimed, suddenly hushing himself by throwing a hand over his lips. “Are you free to start today?” Dan nodded and in his head, he tried to figure out what to start with. This was going to take him a few weeks to manage, especially if Phil and two other humans were trailing behind him and messing it up every couple days. But he was getting paid to clean up other people’s messes. He wasn’t complaining. This would work out just fine. Phil nodded, stood there for a second and then he cleared his throat. “Well if you have any questions, just ask. I’ll be in the kitchen making lunch. Do you like pancakes?” Dan gave him a singular nod, to be polite, and then watched as Phil scurried out of the room. He took off his shoes and put them in the corner of the lounge where they wouldn’t get lost among Phil’s objects, then he sat down in the middle. “Oh, and Dan?” Dan looked up at Phil’s head that had popped around the corner. “Do your best to be quiet. I don’t want to wake her.” Dan nodded and offered a half smile. Okay. Time to organize. - Phil made pancakes in the kitchen and took his time. Dan was sifting through objects in Phil’s house and for some reason, Phil didn’t really mind. He thought that this would bother him - the idea of someone going through his and Scarlett’s stuff. But Dan seemed like a nice guy who would mind his own business and stay out of Phil’s life. At least for everything that wasn’t cleaning related. Once he made a full plate of pancakes, he collected a little cup of syrup and walked into the lounge. He had learned to be light on his feet because of Scarlett but when he rounded the corner with the plate, it seemed that Dan hadn’t even noticed. Phil watched for only a moment as Dan sifted through a few things, tossing them into about four separate piles. One was baby clothes, one was toys, one was electronics and the other seemed to be just about everything else. The lounge’s state hadn’t changed much, however, at the speed Dan was going, Phil was sure that things could get done by the time Scarlett came to visit. “Pancakes are ready,” Phil spoke at normal volume, but Dan jumped almost entirely out of his skin. He nearly screamed, but Phil watched his hand fly up to his mouth, covering it and not making a sound. Phil would have considered how sweet this was if he wasn’t already chuckling. “Sorry. Didn’t meant to startle you.” “That’s okay.” Dan swiveled around and reached out for the plate that Phil was clearly in the process of bringing him. “Thanks.” “Sure.” Phil handed him the fork from his other hand and stepped over one of the piles to sit on the couch. He watched as the younger boy poked around on the plate and then started eating. “So…you in University?” Dan nodded, his mouth full of pancake. “Cool. Cool. I just got out of Uni,” Phil started, realizing that the boy before him was too busy chewing to respond to Phil’s questions. “I graduated with English Literature and film processing.” Phil saw the younger boy nod and he hummed in approval of the pancakes. “Yeah, it was pretty cool. Proved to be pretty useful,” Phil laughed. He didn’t want to tell Dan straight out that he made Youtube videos, but when he sat and thought about it for a second, the camera equipment might be a tad suspicious and he didn’t want to give Dan the wrong idea. Especially if the boy would be coming back three times a week. What if Phil was in the middle of making a video? Surely Dan wouldn’t want to be filmed without permission. It was only fair that Phil gave him a warning. “I should warn you now…” Dan looked up, his chewing paused, as if he was worried that the information would have to do with what he was eating. “…I’m a Youtuber. So I make videos relatively often. So if I’m ever going around with a camera and talking to myself or Scarlett, that’s pretty regular. Hence the…” Phil pointed to the electronic pile that Dan was probably wondering about. “And I promise I won’t film you or anything. I’ll make sure to cut you out of any shots.” Dan looked at him and cocked his head. Maybe he recognized him? Sometimes it took people a second. “What kind of videos do you make?” Dan asked him once he swallowed. “Oh just uh…vlogs. Sometimes I do little challenges or whatever…” Phil answered. He wasn’t used to people asking questions about his career. Usually, to avoid fan issues, he kept that information to himself. “I mostly like to videotape Scarlett.” Phil smiled to himself, thinking about the last vlog they had filmed together. He was teaching her to babble and editing that one was probably his favorite one so far. But he didn’t think that Dan wanted to hear about that. Dan looked confused for a second but he just went back to eating his pancakes. “Thanks for these,” he said, his mouth still filled to the brim with the fluffy breakfast food. It was lunch time but the boy seemed to be starving. Phil had no idea what this kid’s background was. For all he knew, Dan was working for him to earn money to eat. He didn’t know the demographic of this company’s employees. “No problem. I can try to have lunch ready for you when you come,” Phil offered. “If that will help you work faster.” He laughed at his own joke and Dan’s eyes widened. “Oh no, it’s okay. I just haven’t had pancakes in a while. These are hitting the spot.” So he wasn’t starving. Thank God. For some reason, Phil had some inclination to take care of this boy. Whether it was a paternal thing or something else, he fondly watched him eat the last of his pancakes. “So what are you in Uni for?” Phil asked him, Dan’s head shooting up with a terrified stare and then back down at the plate. He didn’t seem so thrilled about that question. Phil hoped that he didn’t overstep any boundaries. “Um…I’m not um…quite sure yet. I haven’t decided,” Dan stumbled out, his voice kind of breaking. Phil realized that maybe that wasn’t the best of questions anyway and he bit his lip. “That’s fine. I’m sure you’ll find something that fits!” Phil said encouragingly, their eyes meeting for a split second. “What made you apply for this job?” Dan picked at his fingernails. Uh oh. Was that too personal? God Damn it. This is why Phil wasn’t allowed to go outside. Surely he crossed a line. A person in his position shouldn’t ask those kinds of things. “I mean, you look really young. I didn’t know they let the younger Uni students have jobs like this. You know…so you can focus on your studies and such?” Dan blinked at him, his eyebrows up in confusion. To be fair, Phil wasn’t really sure what he was asking in the first place. He didn’t really know what he expected as an answer. “Not saying you are too young to handle a job, I just…” Phil swallowed, his word hole opening wider and swallowing him up. Phil decided he should let the man he was literally paying to clean his house, do the job he came for before he insulted him with any more personal questions. He stood from the sofa and took the empty plate from the boy in front of him. “Nevermind. I actually have to go…ch-check on Scarlett. I’ll leave you to it then.” Dan watched as he hastily left the room, Phil attempting to get out of there as fast as possible. He hoped he didn’t make things awkward by asking something too personal. He put Dan’s plate in the sink and then slumped over against the counter. Fuck. Human interaction was just as hard as he remembered. It probably didn’t help that this boy was very attractive. He thanked the universe that Scarlett was taking an especially long nap today and that Phil had a moment to walk off his ridiculously cringy conversation. He headed down the hallway and shut himself in his own room, sighing and falling back onto his bed. He hoped that Dan didn’t just leave after today. He didn’t have much other choice. - Phil was strange. It wasn’t that Dan didn’t like him, it was just that he seemed like someone Dan would make easy friends with usually. Dan was a tad socially awkward and this guy seemed like he leaked awkward from his ears. He didn’t really know how to stop talking and his brain seemed like it took on the same appearance that the rest of his house did. It was like his mind was in a constant state of clutter and disorganization. But Dan had a job and that was really all that mattered. He realized that the messier the person, the more money he’d get. Secretly, he was glad that he was assigned this guy’s house. This meant he had a job for a least a few months. That being said, this was going to be a hard job. Even after spending three hours organizing things into piles, he still only made a dent. Phil had ushered him out quietly after telling him that Scarlett would be waking soon and that Dan should leave before then. Dan agreed and told the man that he would be back on Monday to pick up where he left off. He almost told Phil not to touch his piles, but he assumed that was implied. He hoped that the mess wouldn’t cumulate by the time he came back. The other strange thing that Dan noticed was the way the Phil talked about his girlfriend. Scarlett seemed like she was very particular. Somone who needs a lot of quiet during a nap and someone who would be disturbed by another human’s presence after waking seemed like a strange person. Then again, Phil was strange so Dan supposed that it fit. He did wonder, however, whether this girlfriend of Phil’s was going to make it hard for Dan to do his job. Did she even know he was doing this for Phil? And what was the deal with all the baby things? Dan found so many little toys and outfits and he was sure that Phil would have mentioned another human being, baby or not, that lived with them. He was starting to think that maybe Phil was a little more than strange. Was he imagining an infant that lived with him? Was Phil crazy? Then something occurred to him. Phil was a Youtuber. He mentioned that he liked to film Scarlett. Maybe he could get a better grasp of the person he was dealing with by watching a few of his videos. In fact, it might help him with the cleaning process. He might be able to find homes for things faster if he knew the aesthetic of Phil and his family. So once Dan’s legs carried him back to his own (very clean) apartment, he hooked up his laptop to the TV and made a little bag of popcorn. Was this weird? Yeah, this was definitely weird. He was about to watch some videos of his boss and his girlfriend before he rifled through all of their stuff for money. Well. What Phil wouldn’t know wouldn’t hurt him, right? He typed in Phil Lester on Youtube and a bunch of videos popped up. He clicked on the first video he could see and just let it play. He didn’t even bother with a title. He was so impatient sometimes. Two seconds into the video, Dan already felt like an idiot. There Phil was, gently talking to the camera and bouncing a very very young baby which he addressed as Scarlett immediately. Oh. He watched for a few more minutes and then when the video ended, the next one queued up to play. He read the title for this one; “Scarlett’s Origin Story”. Well, that could be helpful. He listened carefully as Phil explained a girl in America and their crazy meeting in the city. The story was funny. Phil seemed like a funny guy, but it dawned on Dan that this story didn’t really have the ending he expected. Phil started explaining, in a more serious tone, that Scarlett’s mother was not in the picture anymore and that they don’t actually talk at all. Baby Scarlett entirely belonged to Phil and she was the best thing that had ever happened to him. Dan definitely was a sap, but it was moments like this that he hated to admit it to himself. He was awestruck by this story. Phil was such a genuine human being. He hadn’t even hesitated to adopt this child. Even though he had nobody to help raise it. He even admitted in the video that he was totally scared and that he had no experience with children at all. Dan supposed that might be why the man’s house was a mess. This guy had no idea what he was doing. Taking care of this child was the only thing he could ever think about because she was the only thing he had. Dan sat silently for a moment while his computer waited for him to click play again. He couldn’t believe that this person was the same person he was just conversing with. Phil wasn’t strange or crazy. He was just nervous and awkward. Just like Dan. Dan would never tell another soul, but he spent the rest of his afternoon watching every vlog this man had uploaded on his channel. In order. He watched little Scarlett in fast-forward through ten months of her life. He started with the videos Phil had on his channel before Scarlett arrived and even then, Phil seemed like such a wonderful guy. He was nerdy and played video games and liked all the same things Dan did. Phil was so cool. And having a child? Well, that just made him cooler. There was something tugging at Dan’s heart and he couldn’t tell what it was. Sure, maybe he had a little crush on the man he now worked for. He wasn’t afraid to admit that. But there was something else that he felt deep inside him and he was trying hard not to let that truth reveal itself. The weekend passed quickly as Dan tried to focus on his own school work, but he was very distracted by the thought of his Monday shift at Phil’s. He couldn’t help but wonder if he would meet the Scarlett that was giggling and babbling in the videos he had just watched. He wanted to maybe express to Phil that they had the same interests, without just going up to him and telling him he just crept on all his videos online. All weekend, he tried to think of a way that he could naturally bring it up. Some way he could mention that he also thought Pokemon was one of the best things ever and that he too found Muse the best band. When the time finally came, he raised his hand to knock on Phil’s door when he paused. Instead of the silence he heard before, he heard something akin to a tiny giggle coming from inside the door. His stomach dropped and he fought a smile, containing it to inside, then knocking on the door. There was a shuffle and then the door swung open. This time, the tired man that had greeted him was no longer there. Phil stood before Dan with a wide smile and rosy cheeks and was ushering him inside quickly. There was no baby in Phil’s arms, but when Dan rounded the hallway’s corner into the lounge, he caught sight of who he knew now as Scarlett. “I’m glad you could make it,” Phil said in a tone that was simply melodic. Dan turned away from the baby who was playing in her little swing and working slowly on a slice of banana (he knew now that Scarlett loved bananas), and over to Phil who was reaching out to shake his hand. He looked flustered and Dan smiled, shaking his hand lightly. “I see you’ve spotted my little pea.” Dan smiled at the nickname and turned his head again when Phil went to pick the young one from her little swing. “Come meet, Dan! He’s gonna be cleaning up after you, you little monster!” Phil tickled her little tummy and smushed a kiss into her cheek as he walked towards Dan with the giggling girl. He lifted a hand that was most certainly covered in banana and waved it for her. “Hi, Dan!” Dan was trying to look at Scarlett, the adorable child that was looking at him with these giant blue eyes, but Dan was quite distracted by the other pair of blue eyes that had landed on him. His great big smile was making Dan feel some sort of way, his stomach fluttering as every single person he’d ever met fell below this man before him. He smiled and forced himself to look at the baby, giving her a tiny wave. “Hi, Scarlett!” His voice raised an octave and Phil looked pleased. Dan would make that voice every day if he knew it would make Phil’s face look like that. “Your Daddy says it’s your mess, but I believe you. It’s mostly his, isn’t it?” Phil scoffed playfully and kissed the baby who was coincidentally laughing at Dan’s joke. “Ha ha. Don’t you have a job to do?” Phil’s laughter getting softer as he neared the baby’s ear. The baby squealed and giggled when Phil tickled her. “I hope we won’t distract you. I have a date with this little one.” His voice jumped up an octave and he leaned in to kiss Scarlett’s head as he placed her back in her swing. “We’re gonna watch some Winnie the Pooh, aren’t we??” Dan stood with a grin, blushing at the name of his favorite childhood show. Not only would Dan not mind, but he was actually excited to sit in a lounge and clean while he listened to Sterling Holloway’s beautiful voice. But he wouldn’t say that out loud. “Yeah, sure. N-no problem,” Dan stuttered out. He went over to the piles he had formed the other day, thankfully untouched, and was about to sit down when Phil stopped him. “Wait! Dan. Could you do me a favor? Pretty please?” Phil blinked up at him, his finger being sucked on by the 10-month-old child that was trying to eat a banana. “Could you just put the DVD in the player? I would but…” He gestured to the child that was now gnawing on his finger. “Please? It’s on the table. Right there.” Dan glanced at the coffee table and found the DVD that Phil was referring to. He didn’t say anything and grabbed the shiny object. He walked over and put it into the DVD player as Phil messed around with the remote, turning the TV on and adjusting the volume. “Thanks, Dan,” Phil said in his baby voice, pretending to be little Scarlett. “That’s okay,” Dan smiled and went back over to the piles. He sat down and began to fold some baby clothes from the first pile. Dan was wrong. This was no longer going to be easy. Cleaning this house with the distraction of Phil and Scarlett was going to be the hardest thing he’s ever done. Phil’s smile and the way he handled his child was something that Dan was going to have to fight not to watch. He had never seen someone glow the way that Phil was glowing. Scarlett was this man’s entire world and it was a wonder that he even noticed Dan at all. Phil’s tunnel vision for only his daughter proved to be a bit of an obstacle for Dan. Phil was smart enough to give Dan keys after a couple weeks, this way, even if Phil was out and about with Scarlett, Dan could let himself inside and do his job. And as Dan got more comfortable with the house, he was able to find where things went easily and he no longer had to be shown around. As far as the job went, Dan was just dandy. But soon he found himself arriving early, just so he could get more time around the two. He would tell Phil that he accidentally caught the earlier bus and that he figured he’d just get a head start. Some days, Phil didn’t even notice. It’s not like there was a clock on Scarlett and that was the only place Phil bothered to look. But that was also a problem. After working for Phil for about 4 weeks, Dan had learned a lot about the man. He was single and had been for as long as Scarlett had existed. His parents didn’t live too far away and he went up to their place nearly every other weekend to see them. It seemed that Phil’s video making schedule was pretty regular. Mostly dropping vlogs on Tuesdays and Thursdays, his followers always praising him for uploading twice a week. Dan was subscribed and wouldn’t miss a single video…even though Phil didn’t know that. Dan also noticed that Phil was on the phone a lot with a girl called Louise. For the first couple weeks, Dan guessed that maybe Phil was dating this woman, but that thought was shut down real quick when Dan overheard him mention something about not even being interested in women so much anymore. It was the next week that Dan actually met Louise. She came over without warning, which forced Phil to introduce the two when Dan arrived for his cleaning shift. She called him a Dear and Dan thought that she was also giving him a look - yet he couldn’t tell what that look was for exactly. She was blonde, pretty and super pregnant. She was going to be due “any day now” claimed Phil. He was just as excited for her child as she was and Dan thought it was adorable. Of course, Dan’s little crush became a big crush. It never faded as Dan hoped it might. He cleaned quietly while he watched the most beautiful man and his daughter live their lives. He knew that the two of them wouldn’t work - because he was a university student without any money and Phil was an established Dad with a high paying job but that made things dangerous because Dan didn’t hold back. He was convinced that any other human being would have caught on by now considering he wasn’t exactly subtle. But because Phil didn’t, it was a fun outlet for his little obsession. Phil was sitting at the kitchen table with Scarlett, feeding her Cheerios on a regular Wednesday while Dan was organizing the cupboards when Dan heard Scarlett squeal and throw the bowl at the ground. He was going to turn and offer to pick it up, but Phil had already risen and was bending over to pick it up. Of fucking course, Dan’s eyes landed on Phil’s ass and he tried to look away but he found that his eyes didn’t move. Instead of standing up and giving the bowl back to Scarlett, he stood and turned towards Dan who’s face went red and his eyes trailed to the ceiling when he thought Phil saw him staring. “Oh I know, the floor is so dirty,” Phil laughed, having assumed that Dan was just looking at the floor and not his own ass. God this man was so pure. “Looks like I know what you’re doing on Friday.” Phil winked as he rinsed off Scarlett’s bowl and refilled it with cheerios, only to sit back down and coo at the child who was flailing her arms and giggling. Dan got off easy that time and he figured it would be the last, but it turned out that Phil was just completely and utterly oblivious. That same week, Friday, once Dan was finishing his shift, he walked into the lounge to put away a stray wire he had found in the kitchen when he stumbled upon Phil who was making airplane noises and trying to get something into Scarlett’s mouth. “Scarlett, Baby, you have to eat this! Or the doctor is going to yell at us again,” Phil said, sighing with all the love he could manage. “Please. Be good for Daddy.” “What are you trying to feed her?” Dan asked Phil, the older man seeming to need the break. He sighed and turned to Dan who was reaching up to put the wire on a high shelf. He hoped that Phil was perhaps checking him out, but when he turned around, Phil was just looking at the back of his head. “Peas. The doctor said I need to feed her more greens. But she won’t do it!” Phil complained, turning his attention back to the baby. “I don’t want her to get sick.” Dan nodded, watching as Phil tried again, making a noise with his mouth as the spoon flew in and the baby took what was on it. Dan almost celebrated, but then Scarlett just spit the stuff back up and Phil dropped the spoon, sighing. “One day you’re gonna need to learn how to swallow!” Phil exclaimed, giving up and turning to Dan who was trying his hardest not to comment on that saying. He was still in University after all and he was ashamed that his mind even went where it did. But then Phil opened his mouth and Dan couldn’t believe what he heard. “You’re just like your mother.” If Dan had been drinking something, water would have been everywhere. Did Phil really just…? Dan swiftly left the room before he totally made a fool out of himself laughing and he finished up what he had been doing before he walked into the lounge. He left without saying goodbye that day because he couldn’t face Phil with the image that he had left in his head. If only Phil knew what he did to Dan. It was almost the end of December, only a few weeks left, and Dan had cleaned almost the entire house. The only rooms left were Phil’s bedroom and their bathroom. Dan planned to tackle the bathroom first because he figured that would be the least invasive, however, once he let himself in and he wandered down the hall, he realized that Phil and Scarlett were in the bathroom today. Dan thought that maybe Phil was just changing her diaper, as he sometimes did in the bathroom, but when he turned the corner and poked his head in, he nearly choked on his own breath. What he saw was too much, yet he couldn’t look away. On his knees, on the bathroom floor, Phil sat with his clothes in a pile on the floor beside him. He was wearing a soaked pair of boxers and his hair was dripping. He looked frustrated, but Scarlett was giggling inside the tub with bubbles covering her entire body. Dan would have said something, but he didn’t want the scene that was happening before him to stop. He watched as Scarlett threw bubbles at Phil’s head and as Phil wiped his face with a towel that wasn’t really doing much anymore. “Letty please. We have to get you rinsed off,” Phil tried to guide a cup of water over her head, but Scarlett squealed, thinking it was a game and flailing her arms. Phil huffed out a little chuckle, probably on the fence of thinking this was super cute and totally annoyed with his daughter. “This is not the time to be cheeky! Dan will be here any second and I want to be dressed.” Dan tensed up at the use of his name. He felt a little bad about creeping like this, but now that Phil said he didn’t want him to see him undressed, it would be weird if he announced his presence all of a sudden. She should have backed away and found something else to do, but his body wouldn’t move. “Ahhh!” Scarlett squealed, her arms rising above her tiny body as she grabbed at the cup Phil was holding. Phil smiled at her and shook his head. “Ah ah gah!” “Yes, Daddy’s gonna wash you off now, okay?” Phil tried again, this time somewhat successful. “Good girl!” Scarlett was babbling and clapping her hands in the water when suddenly she looked up and directly at Dan. She stilled and Dan panicked. Phil continued to rinse her off, smiling now because she was finally staying still. “You’re being so good for Daddy! Such a good girl!” He soothed her as he rinsed the last of the soap from her shoulders. Dan was still frozen. He knew he should have walked away, however, something told him to stay. He was about to just disappear down the hallway and pretend he had just arrived, but Scarlett had other plans. She squealed and lifted her arm, pointing at the door frame. “Dada! Da-Dan!” Dan’s eyes went wide and Phil’s head whipped around. Dan was going to retreat but it was too late. Phil had seen him and his face was going redder by the second. “Oh! Dan…I uh…” He looked down at his state of undress and blushed even harder. “I know you said you’d clean the bathroom today. I’ll be out of the way in…uh…” He glanced at a grinning Scarlett. “Just a second, okay?” Dan nodded and suddenly, his feet worked. He darted down the hall and made himself comfortable in the clean kitchen that had plenty of places to sit now. He felt kind of bad that he had just watched Phil bathe his child and he debated just leaving altogether, but before he could bring himself to do that, Phil appeared, frazzled and somewhat dressed, holding his baby girl in a towel. “Sorry…bathroom’s all yours,” he said, rubbing the back of his head. “She was a bit much today. I tried to be fast.” “No problem…” Dan got to his feet and headed to the bathroom, slinking past the man who was still blushing. He got to the bathroom and shut the door immediately. The room was a mess but he didn’t mind. The longer he could be in there, the longer he could hide from Phil and that awkward conversation about why he was creeping on Phil during bath time. He cleaned for an hour and a half, the bathroom looking better than ever when he emerged. He wandered down the hallway to the lounge where he found Phil and Scarlett taking a nap on the couch. Dan almost winced at how cute the image was. Phil was snoring, his glasses sitting askew on his face while he cradled the young girl on his chest. Phil was much too tall for the couch, so his feet hung off the edge and Scarlett had her tiny fist in her mouth as she breathed softly. Dan was going to ask if Phil wanted him to try to tackle the bedroom today, but he decided he better not. He swallowed and cocked his head at the sight before him. It scared him how much he longed to be a part of this life. Sure, he liked Phil. The man was cute and considerate and the way he handled Scarlett was a massive turn on to Dan… but there was something else about this life that Dan craved. He looked at Scarlett and he felt something inside him flip. Something that made him entirely sure he wanted kids one day. Something that assured him that this was the life he wanted. Something that gave him the craving for someone like Phil. Something that drove him to pull his phone out of his pocket and take a picture of the two lying unconsciously on the couch. He felt wrong immediately but he couldn’t delete it. There was something so sweet about that picture and it only made Dan happier to know he could access it whenever. He left early that day because he felt bad. He’d done two creepy things in one day and he felt terrible about it. Who the fuck was Dan to take advantage of an oblivious father and his sleeping daughter? He only let himself look at the photo once while he was serving himself dinner for one, smiling at the memory of a father’s snores and a daughter’s smile. Phil called Dan and told him that he could take Monday off. Dan panicked because he thought it was because Phil felt uncomfortable, but really, Phil explained it was because Louise was scheduled to go into labor and Phil wanted to be there for the birth of her child. Scarlett just stayed with Phil’s parents when Phil returned from that weekend and joined Louise at the hospital. So when Dan appeared at Phil’s on Wednesday, he immediately asked how the birth went. Phil sighed and shook his head, bouncing Scarlett on his hip. “She hasn’t had the baby yet. The hospital said it’s not quite ready to come out yet,” Phil chuckled. “That’s how you know it’s Louise’s. It’s gonna make all of us wait on it.” Dan laughed. He didn’t know much about Louise, but he knew enough to know that Phil was right. It was certainly her child. “So you’re tackling the bedroom today, yeah?” Phil asked, Dan getting himself a glass of water. Phil kept offering during the first few weeks, so Dan took it upon himself to do it right away instead. Phil played with a lock of Scarlett’s hair as he talked. “I hope it’s not too bad in there.” “Can’t be worse than your lounge,” Dan joked, taking a sip of the water. “However, if there’s anything you don’t want me to see, go hide it now.” Dan winked and Phil laughed, but he was looking at Scarlett and not even glancing in Dan’s direction. “Scarlett and I are gonna-” His sentence was cut off when the phone rang and Scarlett let out a little wail. It had obviously scared her and Phil did his best to shush her while he answered. “Hello?” His eyebrows went up as he listened. Scarlett was whimpering and Dan was standing there wishing he could do something to cheer her up. He elected to make a face and Scarlett seemed to enjoy that. “Really? Right now?” Phil glanced at what was happening and tried to make a smile. “I-I…I can’t. You know that. I have Scarlett.” He kissed her cheek gently as the bouncing slowed. “I know…I want to be there Louise, but my parents live a few hours away and I can’t-” Phil sighed. “I know…” It suddenly clicked and Dan understood what was happening. Louise was going into Labor and wanted Phil to be there. “I’m sorry Louise. I know I said I’d be there…” Phil’s face had fallen and he looked really sad. “I don’t have a sitter and they don’t let babies in the room while you’re in labor.” Dan hesitated and he looked at Scarlett who was starting to sniffle the tears away. “But good luck. I know you can do it without m-” “I can watch her.” Phil looked up at Dan, his eyes blown wide. Almost like he hadn’t expected Dan to say anything of the sort. “What?” Phil asked, putting the phone to his shoulder. “I could watch her. Scarlett, I mean,” Dan clarified, blinking a few times at Phil who looked hesitant. “I…I couldn’t make you do that, Dan. It’s fine. Louise will be-” “Seriously. I’ll take care of her. Louise needs you,” Dan cut him off, pleading with his eyes. Phil never noticed him. He didn’t see Dan as anything but his housekeeper and if Dan was being honest, he wanted Phil to see him as something else. Someone who could take care of his daughter if he needed to. He didn’t know why, but he really really wanted to do it. “…you…wouldn’t know where everything is. I can’t ask you to-” “Phil. I clean your house. I know where everything is,” Dan argued. Phil looked like he was about to say something else, but Dan spoke so he couldn’t. “I know she needs a nap around 3:00 pm, I know she loves bananas and needs to be force fed peas, I know she loves Winnie the Pooh and that she’ll fall asleep faster when she’s lying on someone’s chest. I know she thinks it’s funny when you hold things above her head, I know where the diapers are and what it smells like when she needs a change. I know her bedtime is at 8:30, but it’s 9:00 when she’s napped for longer than an hour. I know she hates when you lie her on the ground and walk away but she loves the swing and can be in it for hours without getting bored. I know you give her the little marshmallows from Lucky Charms when she’s good and I promise you I know that you can’t leave her for longer than a minute.” Dan exhaled and Phil’s mouth dropped. “Please, Phil. Let me take care of her. Go be with Louise.” It was almost like Phil was too shocked to speak. He looked at Scarlett and put his forehead to hers. She leaned forward and gave him a little open mouth kiss on the nose and then both of their blue eyes were on Dan. “Okay Louise. I’ll be there in 15.” Phil hung up the phone and stared at Dan for a moment. “Her lunch is in the fridge,” Phil said quietly and then Dan was being handed the child who was grabbing onto his shirt to hold on tight. Phil stared at Dan skeptically as he started walking from the room and into the hallway where his shoes were sitting by the door. Scarlett squealed happily when one of her hands found Dan’s hair and she tugged. Dan laughed and he followed Phil with a little bounce in his step. “You have my number, Phil. Don’t worry. I’ll take good care of her,” Dan kissed the young girl’s cheek and Phil stared for one more second as he put on his coat. Then he nodded. “I’ll be back in a few hours,” Phil said, his frazzled little wave made Dan’s heart melt. And then the door shut and Dan was all by himself with his second favorite human on the planet. - Phil rushed as fast as he could to the hospital. Thank goodness he only lived a couple blocks away. On every other occasion, he hated it because the ambulances always woke baby Scarlett. However, today, he could be with his friend in less than ten minutes and he was entirely grateful. While he was speed walking down the pavement, he thought about his housekeeper and his baby girl, his mind not above worrying. He trusted Dan. Dan had a key and he had been around them enough for Phil to know that he wasn’t going to rob or hurt or purposely injure his child. Dan was a good guy. Phil could tell that much. Phil was certainly surprised when Dan told him all of that information about Scarlett. Information that he definitely hadn’t told him. Or had he…? Phil knew he was pretty oblivious when it came to people that were not his daughter but it shocked him that Dan would even be willing to do this for him. It’s not like they had a really personal relationship. Not to mention, it seemed that Dan rarely interacted with Scarlett in the first place. He was always just kind of there. He supposed he’d rather that than hire a random stranger to watch his child. Phil ran into the hospital and went up to the receptionist, asking for Louise. She directed him to the E wing where he scoured the hall for Louise’s room. It was not hard to find because Phil could actually hear Louise before he found her room number. She did not sound thrilled to be there. He burst into the room and Louise’s eyes sparkled. Her smile told the doctors that it was alright for Phil to be there. She was huffing and puffing and Phil did his best not to notice that her legs were spread and that doctors were working their hardest to get her to push. “Phil…Phil…” Louise panted, her eyes shutting. “Distract me. Talk about something cheeky. Make me laugh.” “Okay…uh…Scarlett called Catherine Gan-um yesterday. That’s the closest she’s gotten to grandmother yet!” Phil said, getting a little excited for his own daughter’s accomplishment. Louise glared at him and then sighed, her eyes shutting from the pain. “Okay…Phil. I’m saying this because I’m pushing a watermelon through my vagina as we speak. I need you to talk about something else. Anything else. Tell me what you did in Uni. Tell me an embarrassing story. I can’t hear about Scarlett right now, Sweetie. As if I do, I might not be able to push this thing OUT!” She squealed the last bit of her sentence and Phil’s eyes went wide. He fished in his mind for something that wasn’t Scarlett related. For the past 11 months, his life had been nothing but Scarlett. So he was totally blanking. “PHIL!” “Okay…okay…uh…” Phil’s eyes shut as he thought for a moment. “Uh…Dan walked in on me nearly naked the other day.” Louise’s eyes opened and they landed on Phil. “ANd?” Louise’s voice cracked. She seemed interested. “And it was really awkward because I think he was standing there for a while and I can’t for the life of me understand why he would watch me give Scarlett a bath…” Phil mumbled as Louise blinked at him. “He offered to watch Scarlett today and I’m a little worried. He knows so much about her. I have no idea where he got all that information…” Louise was pushing and gripping at the side of the bed. “Phil…” Louise whined. “You’re such a fucking idiot.” Phil furrowed his brows. Usually, they tell you that you’re supposed to let the women who are giving birth insult you, but he wasn’t exactly sure he knew what that was for. “…what?” “I said…” Louise let out a little grunt and a half scream. “You’re a fucking IDIOT.” Phil didn’t know what to say. “W-why?” Louise was panting, but she kept speaking. “Dan…Dan likes you, Phil. He likes you a lot. I can see it in his eyes.” “He what?” “He likes you! Phil! He’s constantly looking at you. Whenever I’m over, it seems it’s all he’s doing,” Louise explained while she took a moment to breathe. “He’s not being creepy. He just cares. He cares enough to know what Scarlett needs. You are just too absorbed in your daughter’s aura that you can’t see his heart eyes.” “But he’s so young…” Phil said, shaking his head. Louise laughed. “That company only hires you if you’re over 20. He’s not younger than that, I promise,” Louise tried pushing again. “Besides…it doesn’t…matter…how old he is…if you like him…ask him…” She screamed. “OUT!” Her panting was getting heavier and Phil was trying to take in the information he was receiving and the birthing that was happening all around him.“Plus, when’s the last time you got laid, hm?” Louise squeaked, the doctors giving the two a humored glance. “I think you could use it.” “Almost there, Louise. You’re doing great. One last big push, okay?” One of the doctors coaxed her into pushing again, Louise’s face scrunching up.“Phil Lester, you’re a great…guy…but seriously. Open your fucking…” Louise screamed and her hand reached out and grabbed Phil’s. “EYES!” Phil bit his lip because Louise was a lot stronger than he anticipated, his hand crumbling under the pressure of her grip. That was going to bruise. But then, both of them froze when they heard the faint sound of a baby crying. Originally, Phil wanted to be here because he wanted to support his friend that had been here all along. But now he was grateful that he came because he missed the birth of his own child. This was the one thing in his child’s life that he missed and he was glad that he could be a part of Louise’s child’s life in this way. She already told him that he was the Godfather of her children and of course, she was Scarlett’s Godmother. But being here for this was something he could never have imagined. The baby was cleaned off and swaddled, getting returned quickly to Louise’s arms. Her tears were running down her cheeks and in that moment, Phil knew what it was like to see him with his child. Louise, who was previously entirely invested in his Dan story, now looked like she didn’t even know he was there. Phil smiled and reached forward to pet the little boy’s foot. He remembered when Scarlett’s feet were that small. He remembered her hand barely being able to wrap around his thumb. He couldn’t believe she had gotten that big that fast. “Congratulations, Louise,” Phil said, her smile bigger than it had been before. She was kissing the child’s head while it squirmed in her arms. “I’m sorry, Sir. We have to do a series of tests and if you aren’t family, I’m afraid you’ll have to sit outside,” one of the nurses told him. Louise didn’t even bat an eyelash and it seemed his job was done. Louise could thank him later and he could go home and check on Dan and Scarlett. He opened the door to his flat and heard nothing. For a moment, it concerned him that all the lights were out, but upon further inspection, he realized that the lights in the lounge were on. He crept into the lounge where he spotted Dan on the same couch he is usually sprawled on, holding a little Scarlett on his chest. She was freshly changed into pajamas and it seemed that she was sound asleep. Dan was also asleep, however, his arms were clutched around the baby as if not to let her fall. He was holding her so tightly that Phil was impressed. It took him months to master the art of holding his child and sleeping as well. He left them for a moment to go shuck his coat and his shoes. He checked the time. He was only gone for two hours and Dan wasn’t even technically done with his work day. He debated waking them, but then he thought about how waking Dan would also wake Scarlett and that he just couldn’t do. So he went to the kitchen and quietly made two sandwiches for him and Dan to share. He heard a little bit of shuffling from the lounge and Phil stayed quiet. He didn’t want to startle Dan so he waited to see if Dan would go back to sleep. Instead, Dan had gotten up carefully, a sleeping Scarlett in his arms, and carried her to her bedroom. He must have gently put her down in her crib because a few seconds later, he reappeared in the hallway as he slowly and carefully shut the door to her room. That’s when he saw Phil watching him. He blushed a little and watched his feet as he padded into the kitchen, smiling at Phil and noticing the sandwich on the counter. “Is this for me?” He spoke so quietly as if Scarlett was asleep right there in that room. Phil nodded as Dan rinsed off his hands in the sink and picked up the sandwich. “Thanks.” “No, thank you, Dan,” Phil said, not able to express his gratitude enough. “I’ll make sure I pay you extra for today.” “No, Phil, it’s fine. I had a good time. Really. Don’t worry about it,” Dan said, his mouth full of sandwich. They were still talking so softly that Phil actually leaned in to hear Dan better. “I really appreciate what you did. Louise was very happy that I could make it,” Phil explained. Dan nodded while he ate, his smile allowing a few crumbs to fall from his mouth and onto the plate. “Really, it’s no problem,” Dan said again, shoving the rest of the sandwich into his mouth and standing up straight. He seemed not to notice how close Phil had gotten to him until he stood. “I didn’t realize you knew so much about Scarlett,” Phil praised, wanting to express how impressed he actually was. “You’re really good with her.” “Well, I’m around you guys enough. It’s not terribly difficult to pick up,” Dan said. “N-not saying it’s not hard to be a dad…cause you do a great job it’s just…yeah…” Phil laughed lightly and nodded. “I get it,” he took Dan’s plate, his arm brushing against Dan’s as he did. “She didn’t give you any trouble, did she?” “Nope,” Dan smiled proudly. “I even got her to eat her peas!” Phil turned his head and nearly dropped the plate in the sink. “What?” He gasped. “You didn’t.” “I did. Look,” he pointed at the empty can of baby peas on the counter. “Seems like she’s better for me than she is for daddy.” Phil watched as the younger boy smirked. He couldn’t help but think about what Louise said. Dan liked him ? There was no way. “Maybe you have more uses than just a house keeper…” Phil said, wiping his hands off on the towel that Dan had conveniently hung on the oven’s handle. “I guess I know who to call when the doctor yells at us again.” “I’d be happy to help,” Dan said, his eyes making contact with Phil’s. For the first time since he’d met Dan, he finally was getting a good look at the younger boy’s eyes. They were light brown with little flecks of yellow that only showed themselves when the light hit them just right. His fringe was much like Phil’s but Dan’s was brown and he could just barely see his eyes through the right side. Phil smiled down at the boy and suddenly his mind reminded him of the way he found his daughter and Dan, sleeping on the couch in the lounge. There was nobody on the planet that was good enough for his daughter. Not even Phil. But right now, in this kitchen, he was staring at someone who might be as good as it got. Phil had never felt this way about another person before and it was clear that Dan was something special because of it. Phil decided, because he didn’t want to lose his chance, to lean in first. But thank God he did, because Dan was soon leaning too and then there was a kiss. A kiss that knocked Phil off his feet. Not literally, but when his arms wrapped themselves around the boy in front of him, it was as if he needed to hold on. Dan snaked his arms around him, the same arms that were only moments before, cradling his daughter. Dan was warm, from his lips to his hands to his chest, and Phil hummed as their lips moved against one another. Neither felt like they wanted to pull apart, but Phil didn’t want to get carried away just yet so he gently pulled back and let go of his gentle grip on Dan’s lips. He glanced at Dan who had his eyes shut and smile on his lips. Surprisingly, Dan spoke first. “I’ve been waiting for you to do that for so long…” he admitted, his eyes opening and landing on Phil who was blushing. He didn’t just hand out kisses to everyone and this was kind of a first-time experience for him. Sure, Scarlett was a fairly sudden relationship but they only kissed after a week and a half of casual dating. Dan looked new to this as well and Phil was grateful for that. “You have no idea.” “Well, I’m glad you waited…” Phil scratched the back of his head. “How long…may I ask?” Dan chuckled and looked at his feet. “Since day one…” He didn’t sound ashamed. “But you didn’t notice, huh?” Now it was Phil’s turn to laugh. He shook his head. “Nope. I clearly wasn’t paying attention,” Phil sighed. “I get a little…wrapped up sometimes.” “I know…it’s cute.” Phil wasn’t used to being called cute. This made him very happy and he bit his lip. “So…does this mean you wanna maybe…” Dan started, trying to lead this conversation that Phil wasn’t exactly helping with. “Ask me out?” That’s when Phil’s face turned serious. He did. He really did. But there were some things Dan needed to know first. “Dan…” Phil started, Dan’s eyes meeting his. “My daughter is everything to me. Everything. And I like you. I really really like you. But you have to know that you will always come second to my daughter.” Dan nodded, completely comprehending this condition. “You must know that if you agree to be with me…you are also agreeing to be with my daughter,” Phil explained. “If that is okay with you…then yes, I suppose I do want to ask you out.” Dan did a little wiggle and he flung his arms up around Phil’s neck. “There’s nothing I would love more than that,” he said, his eyes sparkling the way Louise seemed to have noticed before he had. “And there is nothing I’d love more than to make you dinner tonight. Care to stay?” Phil asked, kissing the brown haired boy once more. “Absolutely.” - Dan had gone home that night completely giddy. Phil made him dinner and all three of them enjoyed each other’s company while they ate some ravioli. Dan showed Phil how he got Scarlett to eat her peas and Phil was forever grateful for the trick. He felt like he was walking on cloud nine. Dan was finally filling that hole that he so desperately needed to be filled. Everything was running smoothly. He was running his usual hour early on January 1st when he let himself into Phil’s flat. It was 10:00 am and Phil had told him to be there by 11:00. “Phil!” Dan shouted, hearing a baby’s laugh from the kitchen so he knew she couldn’t have been asleep. He rounded the corner and found Scarlett in her high chair chewing on some cheerios. “Phil I’m here!” Phil wasn’t in the room so Dan assumed he had gone to take one of his world famous fast showers. He could leave Scarlett in her high hair for about 5 minutes before she freaked out from loneliness. Dan reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a fresh banana that he had picked up from the Starbucks across the street. Along with a fresh Caramel Macchiato for Dan and Phil to share. He opened the banana and broke it into tiny, tiny pieces for Scarlett to eat. “Happy Birthday, Letty,” Dan kissed the top of her head and she grabbed at him. He pointed to the banana that was now sitting on her tray. “Here. Have some banana.” She squealed in approval as she picked up a piece with her tiny fingers. “You better be good for Daddy today. He’s stressing out a lot. You have no idea,” Dan watched as she chewed happily. “But I know you’ll be good for him because you always are, aren’t you?” Scarlett was coming from America today. She was planning to stay with Phil for a couple days and Dan had offered to help out. Phil took the offer graciously and Dan said he’d be over as early as he needed him. An hour early, in fact. The apartment was totally clean and it was all thanks to Dan’s hard work. He was happy to do it honestly, especially since Phil was rather stressed about their American visitor. Phil just wanted to prove that he was taking good care of their baby girl. Dan insisted to him that no matter what, Scarlett was happy and her mother should be too, but Phil was still nervous and Dan couldn’t blame him. Dan was sitting and sipping their coffee when a dripping wet and discombobulated Phil rushed into the room. He looked like he was ready to do damage control, as he didn’t know that Dan had arrived, but when he saw the younger boy sitting on the chair and he realized he was wearing only a couple towels (one around his waist and the other around his neck), he blushed from head to toe. “Oh…Hi Dan,” he smiled, his hand instinctively grabbing at the towel that was hanging low on his waist. “You’re here early…” “And you’re not dressed,” Dan stood and lifted the coffee to Phil’s lips for him, his partner taking a couple sips and smiling. Dan planted a kiss on Phil’s lips and they both turned to Scarlett who had released a giggle. “Go. Get dressed. I’ll watch her.” “You sure?” “Yes, you spoon, go,” Dan slapped the man on his ass lightly and Phil glared at him. “Hey. Not in front of Scarlett.” Dan rolled his eyes and turned around. “I don’t know, I think she wants to see you get beat. Don’t you, Letty?” Dan cooed, sitting down next to her. She clapped her hands and Dan raised an eyebrow at Phil. “No she doesn’t,” Phil whimpered, smiling at the little girl before him. “You’re a bad influence.” “Sure I am,” Dan smiled. “Guess who brought her a banana on her birthday?” Phil rolled his eyes and turned to head back down the hallway. Once Scarlett had finished eating all she could, Dan picked her up and shuffled down the hallway with her to find his boyfriend. He hopped on the unmade bed (that he promised he would make for Phil later) with his daughter. She lied on his stomach and garbled while Dan played with her little fingers. Phil came into the bedroom, dressed to impress, but Dan was far too distracted with Scarlett to notice. And that’s how Phil knew that Dan was perfect for them. He had won the love of Scarlett Lester.

[drewxmay]

Contestshipping Review - Part Seventeen - Odd Pokemon Out

Previous

Next

Index

-The Title-

@theodd1sout must’ve made this episode.

-Episode Link-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-s5cfx7l8jU

Btw the 5th result for when I searched up the episode was a video by @theodd1sout.

(Why am I making comments in the episode link section of the post now)

-The Review-

0:00

So the episode starts out with the narrator explaining that they are on their way to Chrysanthemum island on their boat but in order to get there they need to take two boats and now they are going to the island that has the boat they need to go to next.

Also this:

If you read the conclusion from my last review then you already know what I am going to say.

Even though May should be exited just as much as everybody else and be looking out to the next island, instead she is standing next to everybody else contemplating the letter she thinks was sent by Drew becuase it had a rose come with it.

That unknowing crush thing is an ongoing theme even in the episode that have little to none to do with Drew (This episode is about Ash and Team Rocket).

See even in episodes like this I can find evidence to Contestshipping.

0:29

And now everybody is releasing their Pokemon when they reach the island. Now we can screenshot all of them!

0:41

This theme song is the longest fragment we’ve had in one of these episodes. Skip to 0:53 if you don’t want to hear it

1:02

A bunch of tiny Ryhorn throw a ball of grass at Donphan and then Donphan is so big that even though they want to play the three Ryhorn run off. Donphan continues to follow the Ryhorn until the adult Ryhorn notice and try to fight off Donphan. This creates a stampede and everybody is running away.

1:48

Nurse Joy: Don’t worry kids! I’m coming!

Why is she trying to act so bad-ass here?

So Nurse Joy sends out Maganiam and it uses growl. This puts all of the Ryhorn in a happy state of mind and go back to doing what they were doing.

Then May reads the Pokedex entree for Maganiam.

2:56

And now Grovile is missing from the huge group of Pokemon.

he seems to be fighting a Tropious.

Ohhhh now I remember this episode, I remember liking it a lot too.

Ash: What the hack is Grovile doing?

To be completely 100% honest I do not find heck to be a swear word in the slightest bit but I know that in families that are extremely strict over swearing saying “heck” is like saying “fuck” is our families and we are allowed to do it and all it is just kinda strong I guess and I am proud of this show for letting Ash say “hack” in the most casual way possible becuase it is normal.

why did I just go on a rant about the word heck I am extremely confused.

3:30

So basically Nurse joy says that Tropious has marked that tree as his own (spoilers it’s a boy it’s the same kind of spoilers that I gave that the Arcanine is a girl, you don’t understand why thy at bit of information is important till the end.) and that if anybody came near his tree he would attack, so now they are both having a battle.

Grovile uses leaf Blade or whatever (I cannot for the life of my remember his attacks I watched this episode last back when I was ten) but then Tropious uses something like leave blade, I mean the leaves on his back grow white and they look dangerous and before Grovile can git he is tackled by the huge beast Pokemon, who then uses gust to give Grovile a hard landing on the ground, and once Grovile was on the ground Tropious used Razor leaf.

Nobody said the names of the attacks I can just tell does that make me a pokeani fan?

Then nurse joy calls out for Maganiam to help, so then she (same spoiler as to Tropious being a boy) uses razor leaf on Tropious and gets his attention off of Ash’s Grovile.

After getting his attention she speaks in Pokemon something like “Please stop you are hurting other trainer’s Pokemon” and then Tropious stops fighting.

4:27

So Grovile is very hurt by that fight and so Nurse Joy takes him to the Pokemon Center.

4:42

And now for the team Rocket scheme for the episode.

They want the Tropious to give to the boss, and in order to get it Meowth is going to try and talk to him and try to get him to follow them. When he tried this, he tells Tropious that if he follows them he could have everything he ever wanted like all of the Pokeblock and a pillow for its giant head. None of the stuff Meowth offers is a lie, Tropious asks if this is a lie and Meowth tells him that he isn’t. Tropious asks for one more thing and Meowth says sure, when Jessie and James ask what he wanted Meowth explains that he just wants the Maganiam to come to becuase they are both what is closest to “Pokemon Dating”.

Also before anybody gets mad at me about it being a straight couple and that I’m just making assumptions about the Maganiam being a girl and the Tropious being a boy Meowth actually says that “he just wants Maganiam to come to” and later he says something else but I don’t remember what referring to Maganiam as a girl.

If you want something LGBT+ just remember that Harley is gay.

Meowth you should know how big of a problem that would be.

You know what if they fought it and caught it there would be no problem becuase he is a wild Pokemon.

Also this is unrelated but Tropious has banana’s growing under their heads and all Tropious are known as “Fruit Pokemon” so props to Pokeani for knowing that a banana is a berry, and all berries and technically fruit.

6:58

Maganiam is using her magical flower around her neck to help heal Ash’s Grovile.

Also Grovile likes Maganiam

Oh yay conflict of the episode

So after Nurse Joy and Maganiam leave the room Brock explains how obvious it is that Grovile likes Maganiam. Brock explains that after Grovile lost to Tropious he lost a lot of confidence to tell Maganiam he loves her. After they all leave the room to let Grovile rest Grovile leaves the room to go and talk to Maganiam.

But nobody else knows he’s gone.

8:40

And now Team Rocket is inside of a noticeable af robot to try and steal Maganiam.

Oh look they look Maganiam.

9:03

And now for their stupid speech. Skip to 9:35 if you don‘t want to hear it.

9:35

I’ll live a prediction to what will happen next now.

So Pikachu tries using thunder and fails becuase thunder protection and then Grovile frees Maganiam.

Let’s see how close I get this time.

So what happens is the ship runs off and Ash and friends run after it, then it cuts to Grovile.

9:48

So apparently he ran off to fight this extremely powerful Tropious.

They have a stare down and do nothing else but stare at each other in the menacing anime way for like a full fucking minuet.

10:23

Finally the actual battle!

Tropious Uses Gust but Grovile is able to stand his ground. Then, Tropious quickly flies down before Grovile has time to move and uses Steal Wing (I can Identify the attack now!) which lifts him into the hair. While Grovile is in the air Tropious uses Razor leaf. When Grovile lands he quickly heals and it seems like almost no damage is done, quickly after Grovile stands back on Tropious uses Razor Leaf. Grovile continues to stand his ground as the sharp leaves rain from above, and then he quickly runs off the tree so fast Tropious is unable to see where he want. I’m not too sure if Grovile knows quick attack or not but if he does he defiantly used it. Tropious searches all around the ground under the tree looking for his opponent, and Grovile from above (instead the tree) uses Bullet Seed on Tropious’ head. This gives Grovile the chance to use Leaf Blade. He does this, and it’s a direct hit on the Tropious.

11:13

Tropious has been successfully knocked out.

11:20

Team Rocket’s robots comes walking towards the tree and they announced that they brought Maganiam like promised, but becuase Tropious has been knocked he he can’t respond. Team Rocket sets the Maganiam down and when she realizes that Tropious is hurts she runs over to him. She is happy to see him and doesn’t seem too worried about his injuries so when she starts running over to Tropious Grovile for a moment thought she was running to him becuase he was the battle and it was impressive until he realizes that the Tropious and Maganiam were already “dating” before hand.

Team Rocket also all make a comment about how cute a couple Tropious and Maganiam are. They also make a few remarks about how ignorant it was of Grovile to try and flirt with Maganiam , all of these put together make Grovile feel extremely bad.

13:17

So Ash and friends all find the huge robot and see how hurt Grovile looks and Ash Immediately asks what Team Rocket did to Grovile. They explain that it wasn’t their fault and it was just a by-product of Grovile loosing. Then Ash decides that Grovile wanted a rematch against Tropious and then lost. Meowth laughs and says that Grovile obviously won. Then Brock steps in and explains that “He won the game or war and revenge and lost the game of love” and Ash’s response once again proves he knows absolutely nothing about romantic love. “So he won and he lost? How’d you swing that one? Hey Brock you’ve gotta learn how to make up your mind.”

I remember me and my brother having this running joke about Ash being clueless about romantic love and he says stupid things like that all of the time.

14:00

And now Team Rocket is finally taking Maganiam and Tropious. Instead of explaining to Tropious that they are going to take him to the place but sadly the only form of transportation that they have with the robot is grabbing them with huge claws, they just snatch up Maganiam and Tropious leaving them both confused and Tropious thinking that they were lying earlier.

14:20

Grovile, knowing nothing about the deal and even if he did not being okay with this, and also even though he feels he should get over his feelings for Maganiam, he still deep down has them and you can’t get over it that fast, he sees them both captured and this gets him so determined and upset to help them becuase they were captured that he evolves into Ceptile!

15:00

Ceptile jumps into the air, ready for battle. Jessie releases Siviper and James releases Cacnia. Ceptile uses Bullet Seed (Ash tells him the attacks this battle) but when he tried he can’t seem to use the attack. This shocks Ash and the Ceptile. Then, Ash tries to call out for Leaf Blade, and it once again doesn’t work. During all of this confusion Siviper uses Poison tail and Cacnia uses needle arm. They are both direct hits. Siviper and Cacnia use the same attacks over and over and over until Ash’s Pikachu steps in and uses Thunderbolt on the Machine’s legs. It falls over and the Maganiam and Tropious are free.

17:14

So Team Rocket gets their balloon to come over so that they can try and make an escape. Ceptile gets up off the ground and looks like he is about to make an attack, but then Maganiam and Tropious run over in front of Grovile. Tropious flies over to the ship and Maganiam uses Razor Leaf from the ground, and Tropious uses gust to make the leaves spin even faster and to direct them in the direction of the balloon, and then the balloon explodes and Team Rocket Blasts off.

That would be an extremely good contest move if your Pokemon know both gust and razor leaf, but becuase May doesn’t have a Pokemon who can do both maybe she can just do one of the Tag-Team contests and Bulbasoar would use Razor Leaf and Beautifly could use gust.

Just a thought...

18:10

And even though we are still two minuets away from the end I shall summarize the rest of the episode.

Ash and friends along with Maganiam and Tropious all go back to the Poke Center. Nurse Joy explains to Ash that the Tropious and Maganiam will be living together at the Poke Center. Then Ash asks Nurse Joy why Grovile couldn’t use all of the attacks. Nurse Joy explains that even though Grovile has evolved physically, that isn’t all he needs to do, and he also needs to evolve emotionally. Ash thanks Nurse Joy and theya ll board the boat to go to May’s next Contest

The episode that a lot of you contestshipping fans might know as “Spontaneous Cumbuskin”

The second/third most popular Contestshipping episode

I bet everybody who’s already watch it is really exited now.

-Conclusion-

I really liked this episode when I was ten and I like it now. I definitely don’t enjoy it as much but it is still a great episode.

That is all I have to say.

[birdgirliris]

Mun Interview

1) Are you really ready for 111 questions? Bring it. (ELEVENTY-ONE!!) 2) Where are you taking this test at? Test? This is a TEST? I thought it was an interview. Sitting on the sofa while watching one of my murder mystery shows. 3) Was your last real relationship a mistake? I don’t do the whole dating thing so no. 4) Who did you last say “I love you” to? My mom 5) Do you regret it? Nope ^^ 6) Have you ever been depressed? Yep. 7) Are you a boy or girl? Look like a girl but I identify as agender. 8) Do you have a job? Yep 9) What is your relationship status? Single and absolutely not looking. 10) How do you want to die? Very quickly or in my sleep 11) What did you last eat? A granola bar 12) Played any sports? I used to do Tennis, Swimming, Gymnastics all very briefly as a kid. Took Tae-Kwon-Do and got all the way to high red belt before the dojo went under. T_T I also took horse back riding lessons for a year which was absolutely wonderful. Currently getting really into running and training for 5ks. 13) Do you bite your nails? No. I like them long anyway 14) When was your last physical fight? I don’t do physical fights? 15) Do you have an attitude? I can. I can be an atrocious little sass master XD 16) Do you like someone? I am assuming this is a “do you have a crush on someone” question, which I don’t. 17) What is your real name? Anna 18) What is the background of you computer screen? A picture of a bunch of islands from the sky. I love the contrast of the blue and green. 19) Are you gonna get high later? Don’t do drugs 20) Do you hate anyone at the moment? No. I’ve found that hating people is too exhausting. Why focus on someone who is oblivious to your hate and spend energy on trying to take them down? Best revenge is to just learn to move on and self love and keep those people out of your life. Took me ages to get there though and sometimes it’s hard. 21) Do you miss someone? I miss my grandparents. 22) Twirl or cut your spaghetti? Twirl. 23) Do you tan a lot? Hahah not at all XD I am pale as a vampire and burn just as easily. 24) Have any pets? T_T We just put the last of them down last month. I used to have two wonderful ferrets and a Labrador. 25) How exactly are you feeling?! A little sleepy and kind of worn down. 26) Ever eaten food in a car while someone or yourself is driving? Yes 27) Ever made out in the bathroom? No 28) Would you take any of your exes back? I don’t have any 29) Are you afraid of spiders? Nah. I am actually the designated spider remover/killer of my group of friends and family.  XD 30) Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? I SURE WOULD!! that would be so cool to experience history first hand ^^ 31) Do you regret anything from your past? Nah. 32) What are your plans for this weekend? I have work and THEN I HAVE MY BIRTHDAY I AM GOING TO BE SO OLD HELP ME (I actually won’t be that old but still I was hoping to be more accomplished before I turned almost 30). 33) Do you want to have kids? Hahaha no. Let me be the godperson or the aunt or whatever but I don’t actually want kids. 34) Did you ever kiss someone whose name starts with an M? No? 35) Do you type fast? Usually. 36) Do you have piercings? Nope. 37) Want any more? Noooo. 38) Can you spell well? Hahahhaa, I frequently spell things so wrong I have to google it cause spell check can’t help me XD 39) Do you miss anyone from your past? No actually. I’m grateful for the experiences and things I learned, but I don’t want those people back in my life. 40) What are you craving right now? nothing actually. 41) Ever been to a bonfire party? I have a feeling that if I say yes it will be saying yes to something I have never actually done/been to but my family usually does big bonfires in the fall and we all hang out and sometimes have friends over? 42) Have you ever been to jail? Nope. 43) Have you ever been on a horse? Yes! Many times. I freaking love horses. <3 44) Kissed someone in a pick up truck? Nope. 45) Have you ever broken someone’s heart? No. 46) Have you ever been cheated on? Not applicable 47) Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? Never had one 48) What time is it currently? 4:30 EST 49) Would you live with someone without marrying them? Sure I mean isn’t that what being a roommate is? 50) What should you be doing? Writing. I have rp replies and a novella to write XD 51) What’s irritating you right now? My mild headache that I can’t quite seem to get rid of. 52) Have you ever liked someone so much that it hurts? Not reeeally? 53) Does somebody love you? Besides family and friends, nope. 54) What is your favorite color? Green, Blue, Black, Purple, Brown 55) Have you ever changed clothes in a vehicle? Yes. But it’s a pain in the butt. 0/10 57) Do you have trust issues? I have some? 58) You are over half way done with this. Are you sure you want to continue? I am not finished until I have answered all eleventy-one questions. No I will not stop making Lord of the Ring references. 59) Do you have any siblings? I do. I have a sister. ^^ 60) Do you have a good relationship with your parents? I have a really strong relationship with my parents. 61) Do you live with anyone? My parents 62) Do you believe your most recent ex thinks about you? Not applicable 63) Who was the last person you cried in front of? My best friend. I just completely broke down and she was like “ok cool beans, I got this” and was super great. 64) Do you give out second chances too easily? Nope. I know my boundaries and if you cross ‘em, you cross ‘em, and I’m out, your loss. 65) Is it easier to forgive or forget? It’s a lot easier to forgive. I frankly think it’s stupid to forgive and forget. Remember, so that you can learn from it, possibly help others, and so that those who wronged you can’t do it again (or as easily at least). 66) Is this year the best year of your life? Absolutely not. It hasn’t been a horrible year by any means though. It’s just had its rough patches. 67) What was your childhood nickname? Anna Banana. 68) Have you ever walked outside completely naked? wh-....why would I ever do that? XD 69) What is your motto in life? Hakuna Matata 70) Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Yeah. 71) What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Brushed my teeth 72) Do you have a best friend? I do. <3 73) What is bothering you? My headache and the fact that word counts do not go up if you don’t actually write the words. The fact that writing can’t happen by osmosis really bugs me. But I think that it bugs most writers XD 74) Have you ever been out of your country? No. T_T 75) Do you play the Wii? I don’t have one. 76) Are you listening to music right now? No. But I am watching a murder mystery show (Death in Paradise). 77) Do you like Chinese food? GIVE ME!! *grabby hands* 78) Do you know your fathers b- day? I do. But I am not sharing that information. 79) Are you afraid of the dark? No. The dark isn’t scary. It’s what’s in it. 80) Is cheating ever okay? No 81) Are you mean? I can be incredibly mean but I try not to be and leave the situation if I know my temper might get the best of me. 82) Can you keep white shoes clean? Hhahaha my childhood has proven this is an impossibility for me. XD 83) What was the last song you listened to? Why Not (Hilary Duff) 84) Do you believe in true love? Yes. 85) What are you currently wearing? Jeans and a t-shirt 86) What do you wear to bed? Usually just a t-shirt. It gets hot at night here during the summer. 87) What is the weather like right now? IT’S SO HOT AND HUMID WHY DO I LIVE IN THE SOUTH??? 88) Do you like the outside? I freaking love the outdoors. <3 89) Are you currently bored? Nah. I’ve got my tv show, I’m good. 90) Do you wanna get married? I’m so happy being single that I have a really hard time picturing myself ever being married. It’s just not something that interests me. 91) Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? No cause I’m not into that. 92) Are you hungry? Nope. 93) Have you ever made out for more than a half hour straight? No. XD 94) What makes you happy? RP-ing, writing, photography, reading, watching murder mysteries/true crime shows 95) Would you change your name? Mayyyybe? But I like it. 96) Ever been to Alaska? No, but I really want to go. 98) Do you watch the news? Sometimes. 99) What’ s your zodiac sign? Cancer 100) Do you like Subway? Subway is one of my favorite sandwich places. 101) Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Like platonically or romantically? You’ve gotta be more specific here. 102) Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 1.This doesn’t really apply  2. I don’t have any male friends (namely because they refuse to respect my wishes/boundaries and I’m not here for that no matter the gender--me saying I don’t want to date you is not your cue to try harder). 103) Do you talk like your friends? Nah. I might borrow certain catch phrases but my style of talking is pretty distinct apparently? 104) What do you plan to do with the rest of your day? Just chill. Write a bit and then maybe watch an anime/read then sleep. 105) Have you ever seen someone you knew & purposely avoided them? Once or twice. If I see someone I’m no longer friends with I’ll avoid them, but won’t go majorly out of my way to do so. In the unfortunate event I do I run into them, I’ll be polite. 106) Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? All of my friends are girls. See number 102. 107) who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My dad. 108) Does it matter if your boyfriend/girlfriend smokes? I can’t be around people who smoke. And I’m not interested in dating. 109) Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? My dad. 110) Favorite lyrics right now?

I know everybody on this island, seems so happy on this island Everything is by design I know everybody on this island has a role on this island So maybe I can roll with mine I can lead with pride, I can make us strong I'll be satisfied if I play along But the voice inside sings a different song What is wrong with me? ~How Far I’ll Go (Moana)

111) Tag 10 people Everyone has already been taggggged. T_T (but if you haven’t been and want to be let me know and I will 100% tag you)

[nee-biter]

Blueberries and Cream

Paring: Jooheon x Reader

Genre: Fluff

(Gonna add a part two)

 Clinging to your friend for dear life, you inhale and exhale while looking at your left and right. Passing cars look so fast. The two of you exit the small gate of your school and head to the pedestrian lane, waiting for the right moment to cross the street. You grip her arm tighter and she laughs.

“You’re paranoid.” She takes your arm and guides you when the opportunity to cross shows itself. It’s your first time to exit the school gates without any permission at all. You aren’t exactly a good girl but then again, you might get caught by the personnels from the school. Students aren’t allowed in restaurants during lunch time or after school club time. Sadly, it’s club time and you two are supposed to be inside the school premises.

“Not at all” you deny. Reaching the other side of the road, the both of you turn right.

Finally, your destination is just a few steps away. Apparently, your friend asked you to come with her to a small crepe cafe nearby because it’s been awhile since you two went out for a drink or something to eat. That’s why you two went very far just so you could have an afternoon ‘date.’

When you are already in front of the restaurant, the glass doors are opened by the guard inside. Thanking them, you make your way inside. The  crepe café looks so nice. The wall has painted floral patterns on it, the chairs are all either pastel pink or pastel mint green and the ceiling lights are placed in an air balloon kind of design. ‘Pretty,’ you thought.

“Let’s sit down here!” Your friend points at a small kid-sized set of table and chairs. “It’s so cute!” She saunters near that certain set of chairs and sits down, clapping happily as she stares at the potted plant in the middle of the table. Making your way to the seat across from her, you noticed the staff greeting the two of you so you greeted as well. As you sit down, you can sense that one of the waiters are already making their way to you with a menu so you ready yourself, knowing that your friend is too shy to talk and order. In other words, you will do all the talking.

“Good afternoon, ma’am,” two menus are placed in your and your friend’s hands but before you could look at the contents, you take a glimpse of the waiter and you became speechless. He’s cute with his wavy brown hair, black spectacles, squinty eyes and puffy cheeks. “Here are your menus.” Your friend’s eyes are already browsing the selections but yours hesitantly withdraw from the waiter and focused on the menu.

‘Crepe, Crepe! Ah, here, Blueberries and Cream Crepe!’ Sweat drops from your forehead. You can tell you are blushing by how warm your cheeks are. “Umm…” Switching gazes from the menu to his eyes, you began to stammer. “May I have the Blueberries and Cream Crepe please?” He takes this down on a small notepad. Your friend points at the Strawberry Banana Crepe. “And umm, also the Strawberry Banana Crepe please.”

“Is that all?” He asks politely which made your mind go blank for awhile. “How about drinks?” Whipping your head back to glance at the menu, you search for drinks. Your friend mouths ‘water.’

“May we just have water please,” the cute waiter nods and courteously takes your menus. “Thank you.” He bows and smiles your way which made his dimples go a mile deep. Well, not really. But it’s enough to make you combust and almost squeal. Your friend knits her eyebrows at your silly action.

“Well,well,” your friend giggles at the idea. “Are you crushing on our waiter?” That’s where you lost it and subconsciously start to fan yourself. A snort escapes the throat of your friend before she winks at you. Denying what she said, you shake your head.  While waiting for your food, you can’t help but glance every now and then at the brown-haired waiter who is now wiping the tables. This voice in your head begs you to look away but another voice   says ‘go ahead, as long as he doesn’t catch you.’ Unfortunately, the next time you glance at him, your eyes met. It would be fine if you didn’t react at all but being a silly turnip like yourself, your cheeks turn pink and you look down at your arms hurriedly, pretending as if nothing happened.

Your friend’s so amused at this point, especially when the waiter returns to hand you your food. She smirks at you with her brow raised while you sink further down to your seat, wishing that you just stayed for club activities rather thann being embarrassed here. Although, you start wondering what this pretty boy’s name is. But you know the hard reality of your life; you can’t have at least one pretty boy in the world, especially one as cute as this guy. Pouting, you munch on your crepe but smile after tasting it.

“It’s so good,” your friend says before you nod in agreement. “I don’t think I can finish this in one sitting though.” Well, you could. School got you hungry as hell.

When it’s time to leave, you beckon the waiter again for the check. Paying your respective bills, you hand it back to him, expecting no change. Hesitantly, you and your friend stand up to leave. You didn’t want to leave yet. Not before you could know his name. But oh well. ‘The love of my life will slip out of my hands,’you thought exaggeratingly.

“Thank you,” he bows and the two of you thank him back. “Please come again.” And before you could stop your mouth, you say;

“I will, cutie!”

[bangbangbangtanx-blog]

82 Truths

rules: once you’ve been tagged you’re supposed to write a post with eighty-two truths and then tag twenty-five people. 

tagged mah gurlz @hoseokjinns​ and @monstax-nm​ yasss WARNING: LONG AF I PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND IF U DON’T HAVE THE TIME FOR THIS SHIT HAHAHAHHA

name: dani blood type: O (not sure if + or - i’ll get back to you on that one) nickname(s): my friends call me roma, romama haha then i ain’t telling you the name my family calls me no thank you r/s: single since the beginning of time zodiac sign: aquarius babyyy pronouns: she/her favorite tv shows: there are a lot omfg  friends, castle, the big bang theory, himym plu a whooooole lot more long or short hair: i used to have mermaid hair that went past my boobs but i got impulsive so i cut it down to my chin haha height: 161 cm hehe do you have a crush on someone: i have a lot of happy crushies what do you like about yourself: my love for aaaaart right or left handed: right list of three favourite colors: black, white and pastel ahhahaha

right now: eating: spaghetti ramen (i blame s.coups) drinking: melon milk (i am sorry, i always loved buying food from my fave korean mart) i’m about to: apparently eat dinner? listening to: the sound of the air conditioner kids: when i am financially stable! get married: yeah no, probs won’t get married in the future either career: i am currently studying to become a speech and language therapist

most recent: drink: melon milk (it is yummy but i like banana milk and strawberry milk better. i just love milk in general okay) phone call: uhm idk, my sister when i asked her what she wanted delivered? song you listened to: not sure but bts’ version of born singer is stuck in my head rn

have you ever: dated someone twice: never been on a date  been cheated on: i always feel cheated on with some restaurants aND THE UNNECESSARY SMALL PORTIONS OF FOOD kissed someone and regretted it: my dog after he just licked his butthole lost someone special: i stopped being friends with someone i considered as my best friend been depressed: yep been drunk and thrown up: nope! hahaha i have really good self control plus i am the mom of the group so i can’t get drunk (one time i got drunk but our friends were hungry so we went to buy burgers for everyone haha) kissed a stranger: ew had glasses or contacts: i got fake glasses (really thankful for my 20/20 vision but glasses are cute :(((() had sex on the first date: yeah no thank you broken someone’s heart: highly unlikely? turned someone down: yeah cried when someone died: i am a cry baby so yeah fallen for a friend: hahahahahhahhahafuckhahahahahyeahahahah

in the last year have you: made a new friend: yass fallen out of love: i guess? laughed until you cried: yep! met someone who changed you: i think? well, i met her and got a crush on her so i realized and came out as bi hahaha found out who your true friends were: yep found out someone was talking about you: yeah, funny thing, the girl who made me realize i was bi has a girlfriend and she got jealous cause we were really good friends (i don’t have a crush on her anymore and i ain’t trying to steal her)  kissed someone on your fb list: nah

which is better: lips or eyes: eyes  hugs or kisses: i love hugs but forehead kisses are too sweet for my life shorter or taller: taller  romantic or spontaneous: both i guess, since i can be both sensitive or loud: both again, but someone who knows when he/she can be loud or sensitive hookup or relationship: relationship troublemaker or hesitant: like with the other one, someone who knows the limits i guess but can be a bit adventurous

first: best friend: this boy from my old neighborhood surgery: none! sport i joined: swimming!! vacation: we always went to the beach when i was younger but the first out of the country was in singapore!

do you believe in: yourself: not all the time miracles: a bit love at first sight: no heaven: i’m not sure

extras: how many people from your fb list do you know irl: i know most of them irl but not really close do you have any pets: my teddy bear!!! (he’s a goldie and chow mix hehe) do you want to change your name: nope! what did you do for your last birthday: i had three cakes (one i bought for my pre birthday celeb with my friends, one from my college friends and one from my rents haha) oh and as usual, celebrated it with my older sister (we have the same birthday but 6 years apart haha) what time did you wake up today: a bit before 9 am? what were you doing last night at midnight: filling up my queue hahahhah something you can’t wait for: getting a job and finally doing things i wanna do  last time you saw your mom: a few minutes ago what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: being less anxious so it won’t stop me from doing things i want to do have you ever talked to a person named tom: yeah! what’s getting on your nerves: people not being considerate 

daaaamn i finished it ahhahahahha sorry it is sooooo long. I tag @pixykth @itsbangtanlife @jin-oppa @thesublimebts @glossysxga @mochiminii @vivacioustae @overthemoonjoon @peachychubs @kellyzipcode @banginjams @btsparkjiminie @onlyu16 @igotbangtann @taehyung-the-baehyung @parkmily95 @extraplusordinaryx @minsugaspice @ctrbl @kooking-mama @mingyu-u @a--tom @dopemanyoongi @bwimint @taeandsugakookies 

feel free to ignore this mofo hahaha

[onlyjihoons]

Oblivious; l.m.h

hey guyssss whoop

so i had some writing juice in me and i approached my soul-sister @markleetrashh for some prompts and here it is, me writing a fic about mark again

once again(no pun intended), this is semi-requested(more like i requested cheryl to help me lolol) and if you would like to see more of other members, please, please, please request, i would be more than happy to do them! please request i have really little thinking juice left for prompts :’(

i highly suggest reading my olderbrother!taeyong au first but if you don’t its ok i still luv u

note: all my works will be written in an 01 liner’s perspective, but you can fit yourself into it too:)

genre: fluffy angst

guest starring: Lee Dongmin (Cha Eunwoo) of Astro and also SM Rookies:)

synopsis:  you’re in a dilemma, 3 of the most endearing males in your life are living under the same roof and in the same idol group. Your older brother, Taeyong, your best friend/brother, Donghyuck, and your crush, Minhyung. Your brother supports you and Minhyung being an item(surprisingly), however, your best friend is strongly against you being with his closest hyung, and you began to see why as Minhyung begins to play cupid, oblivious to your feelings towards him.

“Wait, so you’re telling me you have a crush on my hyung that cannot even cook rice properly?” Donghyuck exclaimed as he stuffed a mouthful of food in his mouth.

You nodded your head as you took a sip of your banana milk, “Is there a problem?”

“Very,” he swallowed as he put down his utensils, “Have you seen how is he around the Red Velvet noonas?! He’s as awkward as heck, Y/N, I cannot let my best friend/sister date my hyung!”

“But he isn’t awkward around me though,” you pouted as you scooped a spoonful of rice into your mouth.

Donghyuck rubbed his temples and cupped your face a little too forcefully, “Y/N, you will regret this.”

Being your closest friend and over-caring older “brother”, (Taeyong thinks you guys were seperated at birth because you two were too similarly savage and much closer than he was) Donghyuck was the closest you could get to your crush, Mark. He was your crush ever since Taeyong introduced you to the NCT members, those caring eyes and calming smile captivated you ever since.

However, Donghyuck had to beg to differ as he had seen his beloved hyung at his worst, failing to cook eggs properly, using lame pick up jokes, something he wouldn’t want you to suffer from. The last thing he needed was Mark to break your heart.

You sighed as you removed the older male’s hands from your face, “Just tell me if you like me, oppa, I know you’re jealous of Mark because he’s handsome-”

“YA!” Donghyuck exclaimed a tad louder, causing several heads around you to turn around, “I’m NCT’s visual, Y/N, and how could you insult my taste like that?”

“Wow thanks hyuck, I’m so ugly, I got offers from the Big 3, you saw them come up to me yourself.” you teased him sarcastically as you picked up your phone and began to type, “Besides, Taeyong oppa will be so glad you’re taking care of me like this-”

Donghyuck stood up from his his seat and hugged you from your back, causing you to drop your phone, he smirked as he snatched your phone before you could retrive it and raised it triumphantly above his head, “Thanks to Mark hyung I pretty much know all your weaknesses, but does he know?”

You pondered over Donghyuck’s words, he was right, Donghyuck knew you better than you knew yourself, but Mark only saw the platonic side of your relationship.

“I just don’t want you to get hurt by Mark hyung, Y/N-ah.” Donghyuck begins to turn serious with concern washed all over his face, “What’s the point when Mark hyung only sees you as Taeyong hyung’s sister?”

Donghyuck’s words haunted you when you were sleeping that night.

“Are you sure Y/N? Being an idol isn’t all about dancing you know,” Taeyong warned over the phone.

You sighed and joked, “The SM idol life seems appealing to me.”

“Is Mark the reason you suddenly wanted to be an idol?” Taeyong questioned.

“N-no!” you defended.

“It’s not worth being an idol for a guy, Y/N-ah,” Taeyong nagged, “I support you if you really want to be with Mark but honestly being an idol isn’t all about roses. You need to have the passion.”

You thought again, “yeah maybe, i will think about it more.”

You could literally feel Taeyong smiling at the other side of the line, “I wish I can come back home soon, Y/N-ah, why not you come over to the SM building this weekend? Besides, you can see- Taeyong hyung! We need to go now! Text me when mum agrees okay? Love you!”

3 months later

“So, Y/N, what do we expect for Show!Music Core today?” Dongmin quipped cheerily.

“Our NCT oppas will be performing Limitless, but before that, we have WJSN sunbaenim’s I Wish!” you greeted as you smiled.

“Music cue!” Dongmin smiled.

“Okay, cut!” the camera director motioned, “Good job Y/N and Eunwoo-ssi, we will take 5 now.”

“Wah Y/N!” Dongmin praised, “You’re doing so much better than I did when I first started emceeing for Mucore, as expected, SM’s ace!”

“No, no you flatter me too much, oppa.” You blushed as Dongmin smiled and ruffled your hair affectionately, “Good luck with your debut stage later!”

“Thank you, I will go for the rehersal first!” you waved to Dongmin as you walked towards your group’s waiting room.

After 3 months of endless practicing with blood sweat and tears, you debut with the remaining SM Rookies. Your passion paid off as your title in the group was the Main Dancer and Vocalist. You weren’t gonna lie, you weren’t the prettiest out of everyone in your group, but you still had a decent amount of fans due to your outgoing and cute personality.

“Unnie!You did so well today!"Lami rushed over to you and hugged you affectionately as you ruffled her hair.

 "Thank you Lami-yah,"you smiled as the younger member rushed back to her seat in front of the vainity table.

 "Yahhh Y/N! Soon the Astro fans will begin shipping you with Eunwoo sunbaenim! I’m proud of you, Y/N-ah!” Koeun playfully slung her hands around your shoulders,making you laugh.

“N-no its not like that-”

 "Y/N!“ you heard your bestfriend’s voice call out to you. 

You saw Donghyuck in red hair, in his grey hoodie and sweatpants, smiling at you. You gotta admit your best friend looked good, as much as you hate calling him handsome.

“Donghyuck oppa!” you exclaimed as you ran towards him for a hug.

“Finally Y/N looks pretty,” Donghyuck confessed as he pulled away to greet your manager, “You look good with Eunwoo-hyung! Better than Mark hyung-”

“Lee Donghyuck! I heard that!” You heard your crush’s voice echo through the hallway.

As he approached the both of you, you could see his pink hair peeking out of his beanie, wearing a yellow hoodie with jeans. You could hear your heart beat faster as he walked closer, about to burst out of your chest. Mark looked ethereal, and he seemed to be more good looking now than you saw him 3 months ago. 

The SM Rookies used to ship you and Mark together(with Taeyong’s lead) for some apparent reason, which Taeyong kept his mouth shut to (which you found out later on he leaked your secret probably to all of the trainees in SM). Meanwhile, you took the chance to grow closer to Mark, which he annoyingly complied and made you fall for him more. Despite the number of times you had mustered your courage and confessed to Mark, he always shrugged it off as a stupid dare given to you and never took it seriously. That was the downside of being with Mark, his obliviousness.

“Its true hyung! Eunwoo-hyung looks so much better than you,” Donghyuck argued, earning a kick on the shin.

Mark shook his head, “No, no, no. You look so much better with Y/N!”

Donghyuck froze, and turned to look at you. You had an unreadable expression of resentfulness on your face, you looked like you were ready to just shout out your true feelings for Mark.

The rest of your members whipped their heads towards Mark, giving him an “Are you serious” look. However, Mark being Mark, he was oblivious towards the stares directed at him.

 But instead, you placed a fake stoic expression on your face, “Of course! Hyuck oppa and I have been really close for many years.”

“See! Even Y/N admits she has feelings for you!” Mark acknowledged.

Donghyuck simply sighed and pushed Mark towards their waiting room, “They’re going for a rehersal soon, we shall touch up on our make up too. Mark hyung let’s go.”

When Mark left, Koeun ran to your side and hugged you tightly, rubbing your back soothingly as you cried in her arms, “It’s okay, Y/N, I’m sure he will like you back.”

“Mark oppa doesn’t even like me, unnie!” you exclaimed as more tears threatened to fall on your face. 

“Don’t cry Y/N-ah,” Koeun comforted you, “I know it’s hard to not think about it, just dance it all off on stage later alright?”

“So, Y/N, can you tell us more about your debut song?” Dongmin inquired.

“Our debut song is called ____, and some of it’s lyrics are written by yours truly during my trainee days in SM!” you exclaimed excitedly.

“Wow, can you tell me more about it?” Dongmin queried.

“The lyrics are based off a scenario where a boy is oblivious to a girl’s feelings, it’s pretty tragic but I managed to put it in a more light-hearted way as possible.” you explained.

“Can you sing us a line of it?”

“Uhm... I don’t think so, because I think the lyrics are more meaningful when you listen to it live!” you implied.

“I will look forward to your debut stage, Y/N-ssi! But for now, we shall go on a commercial break, please don’t switch the channel!” Dongmin pointed cutely.

“And cut! Y/N please prepare for your live stage now, Eunwoo-ssi please be on standby.”

“Donghyuck-ah! Y/N’s emceeing now!” Mark called the younger member over in front of the TV.

“Really? Move over, hyung.” Donghyuck fixated his eyes on the screen as he shifted himself to a comfortable position on the couch.

“ The lyrics are based off a scenario where a boy is oblivious to a girl’s feelings, it’s pretty tragic but I managed to put it in a more light-hearted way as possible.”

“Wah Y/N writes the lyrics? I wonder who is that lucky guy who managed to win her heart over...” Mark beamed with pride as he watched you engage in a hearty conversation with Dongmin.

“It’s you, Mark hyung.” Donghyuck sighed as he rolled his eyes.

“Say that again.” Mark furrowed his eyebrows, “I didn’t quite catch that, can you repeat?”

“Y/N LIKES YOU, MARK HYUNG!” Donghyuck scolded as he sighed, “Haven’t you been noticing how Y/N acts around you lately? I can literally see the hearts in her eyes when she speaks to you and how heavily infatuated she was when she speaks about you to me every single time. Seriously, Mark hyung, Y/N was really upset when you said I looked good with her because obviously she wanted to look good with you!”

“Oh my god...” Mark mumbled guiltily as he recalled his foolish actions, “I better apologise to her...”

“Apologise?!” Donghyuck retorted, “Oh my god Mark hyung you are the worst person I have ever met.”

“Then what should I do? Get married with her?!” Mark rebuked.

“Well, that was out of the question but I’m sure Y/N will be ecstatic...” Donghyuck mumbled, “Anyway, just confess to her or something! That’s what Y/N wants to hear from you the most. I mean, you can’t reject Y/N right? She’s not herself when she is dejected and stuff, besides, I hate to say this but I think you two really need each other.”

Mark thought over Donghyuck’s words again and again, the more he thought of it, the more it made sense to him. You being shy when he hugs you, and also attentively listening to his rants when he had no one to turn to. He slapped himself mentally for only realising his feelings now, and felt apologetic towards you for all he has done whenever you mustered up the courage to confess to him.

“Uh thanks Hyuck-ah, I’m going out for some fresh air.” Mark stared into blank space as he stood up from his seat.

“Well done girls, you guys did really well today!” your manager piped as she handed out water bottles to all of you. “Especially Y/N, you did a good job as your first day of emceeing!”

“Thank you, I will work harder in the future.” you smiled as all the members gave you a group hug. 

“Y/N!” You heard Mark’s undeniable voice call out to you.

“Mark!” you heard your manager exclaim, “What brings you here?”

“If you don’t mind, can I borrow Y/N for a few minutes? I have something really important to relay to her.” Mark smiled.

“Ah alright. Do make it quick though, Y/N has to attend a fanmeet later.” your manager gave him a nod of approval as your fellow members squealed silently at the scene that was about to unfold.

“Thank you so much! Y/N, let’s go.” Mark pulled your hand as he led you through the dimly lit backstage and to the rooftop of MBC’s building.

When you reached the rooftop, you wriggled out of Mark’s grasp, “Are you here to congratulate me again, oppa?”

Mark rubbed the nape of his neck sheepishly, “Yeah...sort of.”

“Then I should get going.” you supressed your urge to let your tears trickle down your face as you turned on your heels.

Before you could even take a step away from Mark, he pulled you into a back hug, full of affection and resentfulness for his past actions.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N, I was so stupid to realise my feelings for you only now when Donghyuck scolded me about my obliviousness towards your feelings...” Mark confessed as he hugged you tighter.

Your tears began trickling down your face, “Are you only saying this because you feel sorry for me?”

Mark spun you around to face him, “No, Y/N, I’m serious about it.”

“How-”

“I,” Mark pecked your left tear-stained cheek.

“like,”He pecked your right tear-stained cheek,

“you.” he finally pecked your lips.

You smiled as you pulled Mark into an endearing hug, “It took you so long to say that.”

“I know.” Mark whispered endearingly as he hugged you tighter, sealing your new relationship.

KMXWJDIOA I apologise if this is shit omg i literally needed to use up my writing juices urgently csiwba thank you for reading!

[mackinmacki]

Tomato Log V: Flight DLC (Gaming Nerds AU)

Rating: K+

Word Count: 3434

Summary: Maki decides it’s time to go see Hanayo, and maybe confess those feelings of hers.

Pairing: MakiPana

Notes: At least three months isn’t six months. Also, I love my references that most people wouldn’t be looking for or get.

Link: (FFN) / Banana’s Awesome Character Sheet Refs

Despite things seeming like they were fine again, Maki still felt uneasy. Though she was getting to talk to Hanayo more, there was still the specter of Rin that put her on edge. They hung out so much: what if they were becoming more than friends? What if they were already dating and Hanayo just wasn't telling her? Why did she have to be so far away?

Her sulking was once again gaining the notice of her roommates, and they weren't shy about bringing it up. "Have you ever played Xenoblade Chronicles, Maki?" This was how Nico started up their conversation one day while the two of them were in the same area. Maki was looking for something to eat while Nico was watching TV.

"What the hell is that?"

"It's a video game. Look, Maki, there's a character in the game named Shulk, okay? I'm gonna call you Sulk. Because you're always sulking-"

"I get it." Maki, not realizing the irony, peeked out of the kitchen and sulked in Nico's direction. "What's your point?"

"My point is that you're a complete drag to be around. What's your problem anyway?" Nico looked away from the TV and smirked in Maki's direction. "Trouble with your fake girlfriend?"

"Sh-She's not fake or my girlfriend!" Maki protested, going red in the face as she retreated back into the kitchen area. It made sense that she was next to the oven, because she was heated. More than that, she was upset with Nico once again demeaning her best friend.

"So it is about her. I knew it." Nico laughed and got up from the couch, heading into the kitchen to confront Maki. "Why don't you actually do something about... whatever's bothering you instead of just moping around?"

"I don't have to take this from you." Maki frowned and folded her arms, leaning against the oven. "You're just an angry little gremlin with delusions of grandeur." That seemed to hit its mark, as Nico's face went red as she practically growled at Maki.

"You... You... You ass!" Maki scoffed at the lame insult, walking out of the kitchen and away from Nico. She had forgotten about the snack, but she wasn't really hungry anymore anyway. Before she could get to her room, she was intercepted by Eli. Apparently her roommates didn't understand what personal space was.

"Nico has a point, Maki. A rude point, but a point nonetheless."

"Were you just listening to us?"

"You two aren't very quiet with your arguments." Eli put her hands on her hips and stared Maki down. "If you're really worried about Hanayo, then you should talk to her about how you're feeling."

"I can't! It's just... weird to say that stuff on Skype." Plus it was just embarrassing in general to admit that she had real human feelings.

"Then just go see her! Gods!" Nico had returned to the conversation. "Aren't you rich as hell? Just get on your private jet and fly it over to her." That... wasn't a bad idea. Why did it have to be Nico who came up with that idea?

"I... have stuff to do," she muttered, rushing into her room and slamming the door. She tried her best to ignore Nico's laughter as she practically flung herself onto her computer chair, booting up Skype. Hopefully Hanayo would be online...

She was! Maki typed out a message, asking if they could cam for a bit. She waited with bated breath, worried that Hanayo would be busy again. Thankfully though, she wasn't, so they had time to spend together. Maki put on her headphones and started the call, smiling the moment Hanayo's face came onscreen.

"Hi Maki-chan!" Her smile quickly dropped when she noticed the worried-looking smile on Maki's face. "Is something wrong?"

"No! Well, yes. Maybe?" This seemed like such a bold thing to request, and her throat tightened at the mere thought of saying it. At the same time though, Maki really did want to see Hanayo in person. Maybe doing that would give her clarity on her feelings. "I... wanted to ask you something important."

"A-Are you quitting SunFall?"

"What? No! Never!" Now that was something she truly could never fathom doing. "I... I was wondering if you were going to be busy this weekend."

"Oh, that's a relief!" Hanayo smiled, then thought about what Maki said next. "Hmm, no, I shouldn't be. Did you want to try another raid?"

"Not exactly." Maki took a deep breath, glancing at the door as if she expected her roommates to be glued to it in anticipation. "I, uh, wanted to know if... if..." She fell silent, a blush steadily forming on her face.

"If?" Hanayo tilted her head slightly, giving Maki and confused expression. It was such a cute look that it made it even harder for Maki to respond, as she was too busy being warmed by her crush's insane amount of cuteness. "If I'm busy?"

"Well, you're not busy, right?" She'd already said that, so probably not. This was just leaving things in suspense: she needed to say something now. "A-Anyway, I wanted to come see you." There: she had said it. It was out in the open now.

"Maki-chan, you're looking at me right now, aren't you?" Hanayo smiled innocently, and Maki just wanted to slam her head on the desk. This was not meant to be, was it?

"Yes, but that's not what I meant. I... want to see you... in person." Realization dawned on Hanayo's face as her mouth fell open. "I-I think it'd be f-fun! We've never gotten to meet before, and you wouldn't have to spend any money."

"Wow, I... Y-Yeah! I'd love to see you, Maki-chan!" Hanayo's surprise turned into a smile. "I-If you really want to spend all that money just to see me-"

"Absolutely!" Maki interrupted before Hanayo could be any more self-deprecating. The amount of money she'd have to spend was more than worth it to see her, and that was the truth. "I really do want to see you this weekend, Hanayo." Any weekend, really. Any day at all.

"W-Well then, I can't wait to see you!" There was a comfortable happiness settling between them as they started to plan. "I hope you don't mind if my roommate comes with me to pick you up. I don't have my own car." That gave Maki pause, but she quickly remembered that Rin was not one Hanayo's roommates, so there shouldn't be anything wrong with that.

"That's alright. You know, you should really get a car though."

"I-I don't really go anywhere, though." Maki laughed and waved a hand dismissively. It felt really good to be able to talk like this again, like the long time friends that they were. Plus they were finally going to meet face to face. She couldn't remember the last time she felt this happy.

Now all that was left to do was to hide in her room until she had to leave so Nico wasn't able to say 'I told you so.'

The plane ride wasn't long, but Maki had been hoping to take a nap regardless. Instead she stayed up the entire time with her nerves on edge. She really was about to meet Hanayo in person for the first time. This was a big thing for her, and she didn't think she was prepared for it.

They'd been friends for so long now, and it took days and days of moping and jealousy for her to actually take this step. What if it was a mistake though? There was the positive that laying it all on the line could make all her wildest dreams come true, but at the same time there was a higher chance that she'd permanently ruin their friendship. They could probably still be friends, even if Hanayo started dating Rin, or was already dating Rin.

Okay, that was a terrible thought. It made her feel ill that her crush might be - likely was - all for naught. She didn't want to give up, though. Hanayo was just the most amazing, beautiful girl there was. There'd never be anyone else like her. 'Oh Gods, I sound like a lovestruck teenager.'

Maki slapped her cheeks as the plane came to a stop, trying to knock out any unnecessary thoughts from her brain. If she was stressed for the entire weekend, it wouldn't leave a very good impression. She surely was overthinking all of this.

Since it was only a weekend trip, she hadn't brought much with her. Everything she had was in a bag she slung over her shoulder and carried off of the plane. Walking with the rest of her first class passengers, she tried her best to think of anything else but the daunting task she had ahead.

She could think about SunFall. After all, there was a new miniquest coming up that she was planning on completing the first day. It wasn't a major update, but there couldn't always be major updates. All it would be was another notch on her completionist belt. She was so close, she could almost taste it.

She almost tasted the door as well, nearly slamming face-first into it while her mind wandered elsewhere. Luckily she halted just before she hit it, pushing open the door and pretending that was all according to plan. She tried to will the blush forming on her face down as she went outside to look for Hanayo.

She wasn't sure what to look for. Hanayo hadn't told her what kind of car her roommate drove, and there were quite a few vehicles - and people - around. None of them were Hanayo, though. Maki looked around the area, trying to find any indication that Hanayo was there. This would be so much easier if Hanayo would just get a cellphone...

"Maki?" Whirling around, Maki found herself being sized up by a shorter, ashen-haired girl. She had no idea who this girl was, but reacting to her name being called accidentally revealed who she was. The girl clapped her hands and smiled. "I thought so. You look exactly like Hanayo-chan described."

"Hanayo?" That got Maki's attention. If this person knew who Hanayo was, then they had to be the roommate that had driven her here. Since she didn't have bright orange hair, that meant she had to be... "You're... Kotori?"

"Mm!" She clapped again, bowing her head slightly. "Minami Kotori, at your service." Giggling, she stuck her tongue out slightly and pointed to a car that was parked right behind her. Maki had seen that car, but there hadn't seemed to be anybody in it. As if she could read her mind, Kotori chipped in just as Maki finished thinking that thought. "Don't worry: Hanayo-chan's in there! She's just hiding under the seats."

"Oh." Maki wasn't sure what to say about that. Was Hanayo as nervous as she was about this? That was somewhat comforting, actually. Not that it made her any less nervous, but it was something. "So, should we...?"

"Of course!" Kotori kept on smiling as she led Maki to the car, pulling open the driver's side door. Maki didn't know which side to enter from, though. She didn't want to accidentally try to take Hanayo's seat or anything. So she peered into the window and saw a familiar form trying to hide herself beneath the seats.

"Cute..." Maki muttered to herself, steeling herself to actually talk to Hanayo in person for the first time. She opened the door and poked her head in, putting on her best 'non-serial killer smile'. "Is this seat taken?" Was that lame or secretly clever? She hadn't thought to research that before saying it.

Hanayo looked up at Maki with wide eyes, a blush forming on her cheeks as she scrambled up to sit on the opposite seat. "N-No! It's empty." This would be funny if she wasn't so nervous herself. Maki just nodded and sat down, acutely aware of Kotori giggling from the front seat.

The beginning of the drive was quiet, with both girls being too shy to even look at each other, except for the occasional sneaked glances. It was up to Kotori to break the ice. "So, Maki, how was your flight?"

"It was alright. Kinda just flew by." For some reason, that response drew another laugh from Kotori, though Maki didn't feel comfortable asking why what she said was funny. Instead they lapsed back into silence, but that wasn't going to deter Kotori.

"Hey Hanayo-chan, didn't you catch a new item in that m and o game of yours?" Instantly, Hanayo tensed up, glaring at Kotori with possibly the most adorable angry face imaginable. Kotori could only smile to herself after she glanced back at Hanayo's expression. That would do the trick.

"K-Kotori-chan, you know that you don't 'catch' items! You acquire them, and it's MMO!"

"Does... Does she not know what an MMO is?" Maki leaned over and whispered to Hanayo, trying not to let Kotori be aware of what she was saying.

"N-No, she does. She's just being a... a..." Hanayo pouted up at Kotori, trying to come up with an appropriate descriptor. "A big meany!" Maki tried her hardest not to burst out laughing, stomping her foot down against the floor and faking a coughing fit. "O-Oh! Are you okay, Maki-chan?"

"Y-Yes, I'm f-fine." She faked another series of coughs until she was positive that she could keep herself under control. Then, after taking a deep breath, she was ready to keep going with the conversation. "A-Anyway, at least she's just teasing, right? My roommates actually have no idea what it is... Or they don't care," she added, thinking bitterly about Nico.

"Y-Yeah, I remember! You said they called it Moonrise, right?" Hanayo shook her head with a quiet 'tsk tsk'. "It's, it's... disgraceful."

"Disgusting," Maki agreed.

"Despicable," Kotori chimed in, smiling to herself as Maki and Hanayo began to talk about SunFall. All according to plan.

Maki wasn't sure why she expected something different than what she walked into. Maybe it was because she coming to a slightly new place, but it was a university just like hers, so really she shouldn't have been surprised when Hanayo's dorm looked pretty similar.

As soon as Kotori closed the front door, one of the dorm doors opened and out popped another girl, who turned to the three with excitement in her eyes. "You're back! And you brought the nerd!"

"Hah?" Maki barely had time to react before the ginger girl was upon her, invading her personal space. "H-Hey, what are you doing?!"

"I'm hugging you, duh." She laughed, giving Maki a funny look. "You have been hugged before, right?"

"O-Of course I have!" She started to turn red as she huffed and turned to face the wall, no longer attempting to struggle out of the hug. Sure she had gotten a hug before. Plenty of hugs, in fact! ... From her parents. That counted, right? They were hugs, after all. Human arms had indeed been wrapped around her torso.

"H-Honoka-chan, p-please let go," Hanayo pleaded, looking incredibly awkward watching the two of them. It was Kotori who once again stepped in to right the ship.

"Honoka-chan, please let go of our guest." Her smile turned into a strange grin. "Unless you'd like to wear the school uniform again." Honoka paled instantly, letting go of Maki and bouncing back.

"Ahaha, of course, of course! S-Sorry Maki-chan!"

"A school uniform?" As much as she was pleased to get her space back, Maki didn't understand what was so bad about a uniform. "Didn't you have to wear one in high school?"

"It's not the uniform. It's what I have to do in it." With that, Honoka ran back into her room, glancing back fearfully one more time before slamming her door shut. Kotori giggled behind Maki, drawing her attention.

"Have fun, you two. Enjoy your LMMOP."

"I-It's MMO, Kotori-chan!" That just got another giggle from Kotori before she went to her own room, leaving Maki and Hanayo alone in the living room.

"Uh... What did she mean by what she has to do in the uniform?"

"I-I'm not sure I want to know." Hanayo squirmed awkwardly, looking at Maki. "Sh-Should we go to my room?" Maki merely nodded, and the two of them headed for Hanayo's room. As they walked in Maki wondered if she was being too stoic and impersonal. Maybe she needed to be more vocal.

Looking around, Maki noticed that Hanayo's room wasn't too dissimilar to hers either. It was a lot cleaner, though. On the wall was a poster for SunFall, while on a shelf was a very nice-looking replica of Hanayo's beast tamer character. "Your room looks nice." That wasn't the most inspiring of conversation starters, but at least she was trying.

"Th-Thank you." She really was a far cry from the silent and powerful beast tamer Maki had originally believed her to be, but she didn't mind at all. Hanayo was too cute for words, and being in the presence of her made Maki's heart beat faster. This crush was going to be the death of her.

She noticed Hanayo's headphones laying on her desk, those flimsy-looking white earbuds that she could never approve of. "You really do need new headphones, Hanayo."

"Y-You've said that before." Hanayo giggled softly, picking up the headphones and holding them carefully. "They've served me well for this long."

"I'm still gonna have to get you some real gaming headphones." She looked around the room again, then turned to Hanayo with a small smile. "It was really nice of Kotori to allow me to spend the weekend here." Originally, she had planned to make reservations at a hotel, but according to Hanayo, Kotori had been insistent that she stay there instead.

"Yeah, I'm really glad you're gonna be staying here." Maki blushed at those words, but it made her heart warm up considerably. "I hope my bed is comfortable enough."

"Your bed?" She stared at Hanayo in confusion. "But where are you going to sleep?"

"The couch. You're my guest, Maki-chan. I want you to be comfortable here." Hanayo's smile was genuine, but Maki was frowning all the same. Sure, she was a guest, but she didn't want to intrude like that. It was Hanayo's bed, not hers.

"But it's your bed, Hanayo. I'm more than happy to sleep on the couch. Besides, I'm just happy to be here with you." That statement hit Hanayo first, as her face begin to burn up. It took Maki a moment, but when she saw how red Hanayo was, then realized what she had said, her own face began to play catch-up. It was at that moment that Kotori poked her head in.

"Ooh, and there hasn't even been a kiss yet." It was soft enough that it apparently only reached Maki's ears, and it caused her to blush harder if anything. She whipped around to stare wide-eyed at Kotori, who smiled at her. "You two don't need to fight over the sleeping arraignments. I already have that taken care of."

"You do?" Both Maki and Hanayo spoke at the same time.

"Mhm!" Kotori stepped into the room, holding a blanket in one hand and a pillow in the other. "You can both sleep in Hanayo-chan's bed."

"E-Eh?!"

"There's plenty of room, isn't there, Hanayo-chan?" That smile was definitely not innocent. Maki was sure of it.

"W-Well, m-maybe, b-b-but-"

"Perfect!" She tossed the pillow towards Maki, who, with all of her regality and grace, let it bounce off of her face and onto the ground. The blanket came next, landing perfectly on top of her and making her look like a very poorly-designed ghost. How mortifying. "I've heard it's going to be cold tonight, so be sure to bundle up. Have fun, you two!"

Maki yanked off the blanket as Kotori disappeared from view, but she was sure that there had been a devious grin on her face. Cold, she had said? Unlikely, since her face was hot enough now to warm a small farm.

"W-Well, w-w-we aren't going to bed yet," Hanayo reasoned, bending over to pick up the pillow and laying it carefully on the bed. Maki gulped and nodded, tossing the blanket on the bed as well.

"Y-Yeah, exactly." It was clear that they were both nervous, and while they eventually got back to hanging out like normal friends, the fact that they were to sleep in the same bed stayed on Maki's mind the whole time. 'Damn you, Kotori! ... Thank you, but damn you.'