#so again: i'm taking taylor at her word because i hate the take that she's a liar and don't want to contribute to it

[taylorklosscomeout138]

Woke up to Tayliar at it again so I'm here to make it very clear that "Lucy" is NOT Lucy Dacus. Lucy refers to Lucy Simon, Carly Simon's sister. We all know Karlie is named after Carly Simon, so who does that make Lucy? Karlie's sister, Kimby Kloss.

Lucy ELIZABETH Simon

Karlie ELIZABETH Kloss

Carly ELISABETH Simon

If you don't believe me that Carly Simon, Lucy Simon, and James are entirely relevant to TTPD, here is some concrete proof. TTPD released on April 19th, you know what else came out on exactly April 19th in 2016? Taylor's 73 questions with Vogue interview where she said that her favorite song lyric was "I had some dreams, they were clouds in my coffee" from You're So Vain by Carly Simon and then she made this lyric the visual ending of the KARma MV. Right after the Carly Simon comment she filmed the iconic "You should take her to Big Sur" scene before walking back in where you can see photos of her and Karlie framed on the shelf. .....on April 19th. It is undeniably connected.

Now I'm going to back this up with the HEAPS of evidence that majority of TTPD is through the lens of Karlie and Taylor being the reimagined do-over of Carly Simon and her exes James Taylor/James Hart. You're going to want to take a seat for this one.

Lucy was in a sister musical duo with Carly Simon and guess what the genre of music was? Folk. Hold onto that thought about Taylor being James in Folklore because she was named after James Taylor, that's important. Also keep in mind Betty is short for Elizabeth, tying Betty to Karlie/Carly.

Lucy Simon is best known for her work as a composer in the musical The Secret Garden. Sound familiar? It should, and it's from the song of Taylor's that puts this puzzle together.

I hate it here starts off with the lyric "tell me something awful, like you are a poet, trapped inside the body of a finance guy." And then goes on to say "I hate it here so I will go to Secret Gardens in my mind".

Now remember how I mentioned Carly Simon had 2 James exes? Sure everyone knows about James Taylor, but what we all looked passed for so long was Carly's second husband, James Hart. And when you look him up, you find something that matches that prior lyric a little.. all too well.

James Hart also known as Jim, was a closested gay poet who worked as an insurance salesman and he did not come out as gay until 20 years into his marriage with Carly Simon. In other words, James Hart was a poet trapped inside the body of a finance guy......

Taylor is James Hart. And this was the James she named herself after in Folklore, not James Taylor. She has metaphorically been James Hart majority of her discography, and she told us in Lover.

Remember how I said James Hart remained closeted for a total of 20 years of marriage to Carly Simon? In Daylight, Taylor says "I've been sleeping so long in a 20 year dark night, and now I see daylight"

This is where we pivot back to the James Taylor of it all because it is important to note that Carly Simon and James Taylor's wedding anniversary is on the first day of Daylight Savings being over, Nov 3rd.

On Nov 3rd 2024, exactly 38 minutes before Daylight Savings ended and after Taylor just played "The Prophecy x This Love" and Maroon x Cowboy Like Me... Karlie posted herself at a WEDDING with MAROON nails in broad DAYLIGHT despite it being 1:22am Central, doing the TTPD peace sign.

You seriously can't make this up.

Daylight Savings ending meant the clocks went back, like going back in time, to change the Prophecy. Now Taylor explains the Prophecy as being destined to not end up with her one true love. And she mashed it with "this love came BACK to me". Which is the entire premise of The Alchemy with lyrics like "making a comeback to where I belong, your heart said it's STILL reserved for me."

And the final piece of evidence that this story of TTPD is told through the reimagined lens of Carly Simon / both James is in The Alchemy. Because the alchemy IS what undoes The Prophecy.

In The Alchemy Taylor says "he jokes that it's her*in but this time with an e." , and many fans have struggled to understand what this lyric refers to... but it is very obvious for those who have paid attention to her use of Carly Simon and James Taylor.

So now we turn to the question, WHY did Carly Simon and James Taylor split in the first place? I'll let you read.

Meaning when you put everything together, the overarching message is that THIS time it was different, THIS time their love came back to them, because the person named after Carly Simon, and the person named after James Taylor, DID end up together in the end. Changing "the prophecy" that destined their love to fail in the same way that Carly and James did.

Also the "heroine" part to the joke is because in this version they are both women.

And it all goes back to Red with Begin Again. Because who would she be talking about that had as many James Taylor records as her, if not the woman who was quite literally named after Carly Simon?

I wonder if she ever gave us any sign that Begin Again was about Karlie.... oh wait.

In the Begin Again MV you can see a CAR license plate in the background, and it literally has Karlie's full name and birth year in code.

11 = 11th letter of alphabet = K = Karlie

EZ = Elizabeth

K = Kloss

92 = 1992

K EZ K 92

Karlie Elizabeth Kloss 1992.

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

Your deep dive of ttpd was amazing💕 I just have one question. First off I despise MH and second I don't hate JA but I think he is a very depressing man who doesn't know what he wants out of life. Question is when TS performed at the 1975 concert with anti hero, were they involved then ? I am terrible at time lines not that it really makes a difference when he started to play her but he is so despicable I just wondered if they were together then.

Hi anon,

This is delicate and I'd also like to caveat that I am not privy to Taylor's personal life, nor is anyone else on the internet, so I can't speak in absolutes.

But going from the story she's laid out in TTPD: it's not necessarily likely they were physically involved at the time of that concert, but there were at the very least complicated emotional entanglements by then. IIRC in some article at the time of their relationship, someone (maybe Jack? idk) confirmed that they reconnected as friends (after years of not speaking) through Jack when he and Taylor were finishing Midnights in 2022 (and Jack was producing The 1975's album, hence the connection). I can't remember where I read this, but someone pointed out that Taylor and Matty were rarely if ever actually on the same continent until he showed up for Eras because of his band's touring schedule. But also don't take my word for it because I pride myself on knowing as little about him and his band as possible lol.

So like, the story we "know" is that they got involved for real when he showed up at Eras in Nashville in May, because he'd been on tour most of the year before then. As far as we know, Taylor and Joe broke up sometime between Arlington and Vegas tour stops in March of 2023. So there's at the very least murkiness re: the emotional affair, which she all but outlines in Guilty As Sin? and How Did It End?, but beyond that, what we know is what we she's shared in TTPD and what we saw play out.

TL;DR: there was probably risky (and ill-advised) flirtation happening at the time of that concert and an emotionally intimate relationship, but beyond that, we don't know, so I'm taking Taylor's word for it unless she offers other information in the future.

(Frankly, I also think if they'd been physically intimate at the time, Matty would have had no problem bragging about being "the other man" after the shitstorm in 2023 because he is the type and the fact that he hasn't leads me to believe they weren't, but I digress.)

[mywritersmind]

hey girl! are you writing for franco atm??? if so I wanted to see if you could write smth like fluff or reader and franco get in a fight maybe bcs of the time zones and races and he surprises her one night before race weekend like he catches a flight to see her but she still won’t budge on talking to him xxx

YELL AND FLY - FC43

listen up : just arguing but ending in comfort. thanks for the request this lowk almost made me cry

word count : 877

⋆｡‧˚⋆

I can hear him pacing, the sounds of drilling and tires in the background, “I’m just tired, Franco.” We’ve been like this for an hour, I keep hearing him swear in spanish and making sure everyone leaves him alone.

“You don’t think I am?” he groans as someone tries to speak to him again, “Fuck, obviously I’m tired! You’re not the one working every weekend.”

I scoff and sit up in my bed, the sun not even up yet, “That's unfair and you know it, Franco! I work! I work even more when you’re away!” I say sarcastically, “But I'm sorry that you have to do the job you chose and you love!”

I shake my head as he responds, “I didn’t mean that, love.”

“Yes you did. And that’s fine but don’t push your anger onto me. You always do shit like this.”

“Like what?” His voice raises.

I run my hand into my hair, “You don’t think I support you.”

“Well it’s hard to think that when you’re not here supporting me.” I want to hit him, then myself. How could he think that? After I said I wanted to be there but couldn’t because I was fucking working. He takes it back quickly, “I’m sorry i’m just overwhelmed-”

“Franco. I’m tired.” Tired of this. Tired of waking up so early and staying up late for a ten minute call where we just fight, “we should talk about this later.”

He still sounds angry, “I’m busy all day.”

I stay silent. What am I supposed to say? Cry and tell him to not be? I have no choice but to nod.

“Good luck.”

He sighs, I hear the ruffling of his hair, “I’m sorry. I wish you were here.”

“Me too.” He’s mad at me and I’m mad at him. I’ve been with Franco long before his F1 debut, but us yelling over the phone every weekend isn’t something I expected with the job.

⋆｡‧˚⋆

I watched his race, texted him, and logged off social media for the day. He’s off to Mexico but I just can’t leave right now. I’m sitting in the kitchen, eating my cereal and leaning over the counter while listening to Taylor Swift.

There’s a knock at the door, I groan. I’m in the same pajamas as two days ago and my hair is in the messiest bun I've seen in a while.

When I open the door, my jaw actually drops.

“Franco?” I poke him as if I think he’s some figment of my imagination. Have I really gone that crazy that I'm imagining my boyfriend at my door?

“Hi, love.” He’s real. He walks in, shutting the door softly. I want to cry as he slips his arms around me, “I’m so sorry.”

His voice washes over me and I hug him tighter, breathing him in and realizing how much I missed how he smells.

“I’m mad at you.” It comes out as a whisper, my voice broken and sad.

“You can be.” I pull back a bit, his hands in my hair, “I’m so fucking sorry.”

“Why are you here?” I cross my arms, stepping back.

Franco looks nervous, a bag by his side, “I wanted to see you. I thought you wanted that too…”

“Of course I did!” I sigh dramatically.

He smiles at my anger, “So, I'm here for you.”

I shake my head, going to the kitchen and cleaning up my breakfast. I don’t know how to feel. I’m so happy he’s here. But then what? He’ll just leave again and I’ll watch two second clips of him on the TV?

He follows me into the kitchen, “Love… Let me do it.” I let him because I hate the dishes.

I sit on the counter, watching him gently washing the bowl with his sleeves rolled up. He drys his hands, then looks up at me.

“I’m sorry for being mad.” I look at the floor but he steps in between my legs so I look at him, “It’s just hard.”

“It’s hard for me too. I want you there all the time but I'm so proud of you!” he puts his hands on my outer thighs, “Time Zones suck.”

I laugh, wiping my eyes from the tears that spill down my face, “I’m proud of you too. Shit, you’re so amazing. I hate working.”

“Quit.” He says it so fast.

“Franco!” I swat at his arm, letting out a sort of sob laugh.

“Okay, you can quit when I get a full time seat.” I laugh as he smiles softly up at me, “I know it’s rough right now.”

“We can work through it. We’re us.” His thumbs smooth over my cheeks.

He nods, “We’re us.”

“How long are you here for?”

He frowns, “I leave tomorrow night.” I frown with him, “But I'm here now.”

I sigh, knowing he’s right. I look up at my boyfriend, his hands on me. I know I need to live in the moment now.

I kiss him softly and he pulls me into another hug, his arms around my waist, “I love you.”

I run my hands through his hair, “I love you too. We can do this.”

[heavyhitterheaux]

Under the Influence (Slight NSFW)

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: a little twist on the pheromone perfume trend 🤭

Synopsis: An argument earlier in the day is still lingering in the air as Jack tells you his plans for the rest of the night. However, once you get a whiff of his new cologne, you quickly try to put a stop to them.

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Requested by: a beautiful anon 💕

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Tension was lingering in the air as you eyed Jack as he walked into your shared bedroom. The argument that had taken place earlier left the two of you not speaking to one another since early in the afternoon. You wanted to put an end to it because the last thing that you ever wanted to do was fight with your husband.

“Um, babe? Where are you going?” You asked as you sat up from your position on the couch in the corner of the bedroom as you saw him getting an outfit together.

“The Hub. I'm doing a set.” He quietly responded as he took off his shirt and threw it into the hamper without bothering to look over at you.

“Since when? You didn't tell me that.”

“Aren't you going out with Taylor? I only did it because I thought you told me you would be with her. Besides I do recall earlier you saying that you didn't want to be around me. So I'm doing what I was told.”

“Well that was earlier and I want to call a truce. You had an entire attitude with me for no reason. But no, she had to reschedule. I thought we could stay in with it being just us. We haven't had a night to ourselves in a while.” You told him as he walked over towards you with an expression on his face that you couldn't quite read.

“Y/N, I dropped the triplets off with my parents so I could go.”

“I-... not you calling me by my first name. Well, can't you do it another day?” You asked as you wrapped your arms around him. But it didn’t look like you were about to change his mind.

“When I stop being mad at you, that's when your name goes back to being baby. And no, I already told them I was coming.” He replied as he moved your hands away from him.

“But…”

“I have to get ready so I won't be late. Call hot chips and bad decisions.”

“They're busy and I want my husband.”

“Hmm, tough because you said the opposite earlier.” Jack replied as he walked away from you and headed towards the bathroom as you rolled your eyes.

“I know you rolled your eyes at me and if you keep doing it they're going to get stuck like that.”

“You weren't even looking at me!”

“Doesn't matter. How long have I known my wife? Since I was fourteen? I know you like the back of my hand.”

A few minutes later, you heard the shower turn on and you went back to reading your book as you sighed. This had been your first night without the triplets in a while and as much as you were trying to take advantage of it, your husband wasn't budging.

When Jack walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, you slowly lowered your book so that you could look at him. He wasn't paying you any attention and it made you feel some type of way.

“Smush?”

“Yes?”

“You still have an attitude with me but I want a kiss.”

“You'll get one before I leave and no I don't.”

“Yes you do! And you NEVER deny giving me kisses. Stop being mad at me!” You whined as you put your book down next to you and pouted as you crossed your arms.

“No one is denying you anything. I'm trying to hurry up so I won't be late.”

“You hate me.”

As those words left your mouth, Jack slowly turned his head to look at you and gave you a blank stare.

“If I hated you, we wouldn't be married. Stop saying stupid shit that isn't true. Starting to piss me off all over again.”

You made a face at him before proceeding to pick up your book once more to let Jack finish getting ready. When he was fully dressed, you got a whiff of his cologne as he put it on and it immediately made you stop in your tracks.

Got damn he smelled good.

“Is that new?” You asked him and all he did was shake his head no.

“I've had it for a while, just never used it. Got it in Cannes.”

As Jack turned around to come towards you, he was startled as he noticed that you were now next to him and wrapped your arms around him once more.

“Who are you wearing that for!?”

“Do not fucking start.”

“That smells really good. Can I have my kiss now or multiple? Or you can just take my clothes off too. Whatever works.” You said as you squeezed him tighter.

“I… what?”

“I don't want you to leave.”

“I'm giving you a kiss and then I'll see you when I come back but you'll probably be asleep.”

“But…”

“Take it or leave it.”

“Fine.” You mumbled as Jack leaned down to kiss you and you made sure to keep a tight hold on him. He noticed that you wouldn't let him go and simply placed several more kisses on your lips.

“Y/N, I can't go anywhere if you don't let me leave.”

“I know that's the entire point. How long will you be gone? And stop calling me Y/N!”

“Not that long. The sooner you let me go, the sooner I come back and that was the name you were given at birth.”

“Actually it wasn't, but that's a whole nother story. My mother, well grandmother changed it. But I don't think you need to go anywhere anymore.”

Jack let out a frustrated sigh as he wiggled out of your grasp.

All you did was go and stand in front of the bedroom door and cross your arms.

“What…. What are you doing?”

“Standing here so you can't leave.”

“That's cute. Really cute actually.”

“I'm not cute, I'm horny and you are NOT fulfilling your duties as my husband!” You explained to him and he did not look impressed.

“Remember what you said earlier or do I have to remind you again?” He replied as he checked the time on his phone.

“Well that was earlier and now I want you to rearrange my guts.”

All Jack did was walk over towards you and you thought he was leaning down to kiss you, however he simply picked you up and moved you to the side but not before leaning down to whisper in your ear.

“Excuse me, little one.”

“I… JACKMAN!”

“See you when I get back and stop all that yelling.” Jack replied as he was walking down the steps and you were right behind him.

“Nooooo! We're not done here! Just put the tip in!”

“You are no better than a man, I swear.” As he went to open the door, you hugged him from behind.

“Babyyyyy! Pookie! Smush!”

“No.”

“Damn, you probably won't even let me suck your dick so I know you're mad at me. You probably put that cologne on to find another wife.”

“Your mouth gets you in so much damn trouble sometimes.” Jack responded as he turned around to see you looking up at him.

“But, it also gets me out of it.”

“Hmm.”

“Hmm, what?”

Before he responded to you, he took hold of your neck and lightly squeezed it.

“I will put you through the fucking mattress and you won't be able to walk properly for a week if you keep playing with me.”

You couldn't help but to smirk at him knowing that it would piss him off more.

“Who's playing, babe? Certainly not me. You got your wife so wet right now and she can't understand for the life of her why you won't do anything about it.”

By this point, you knew he was completely done with you with the way his neck vein was protruding, indicating his frustration.

“Don't you want to see how wet I am?” You asked as you grabbed his hand and moved it to the waistband of your shorts.

When you heard him sigh, you knew that you had won.

“Get on the couch and do not making a fucking sound or I'll stop. Face down, ass up. I have ten minutes.”

“Yesssss! I knew you'd fold. With the way things are going, you're probably going to make me come undone in five.”

“This doesn't change anything and I’m still mad at you.”

“We'll see about that in ten minutes.”

“I'm definitely wearing this cologne every day if this is your reaction to it.”

“Jackman, we will end up with twenty children if you do that.”

“Doesn't bother me. I love how you look when you're pregnant. And your boobs will probably get even bigger so it's a win for me.”

“Hmm, just like a man.” You mumbled as you rolled your eyes as the two of you were now on the couch.

“Well you were yelling at me to just put the tip in earlier so you aren't any better.”

“And I'd do it again too.”

[oneofstarkskids]

don't say that (part 3)

part 1 , part 2

pairings: bucky barnes x reader

genre: ANGST

summary: sad, beautiful, tragic by taylor swift

*not my gif*

you walked down the cold street with a note buried deep in your pocket. it held all the words you wanted to say, but didn't. you could only hope that it wasn't too late.

you knocked on the door softly, your heart racing. the locks clicked one by one from the other side until it finally swung open. "hi," you whispered.

the red-head looked down, she didn't know what to say to you. she preferred not to say anything at all.

"i know you probably don't ever want to see me again and so do with this what you will, but i had to get it off my chest." you handed her the slightly crumpled letter. you gave her a hopeful smile. one that simultaneously felt like a goodbye.

with that, you walked away. natasha didn't read the letter until you left and you didn't look back. maybe you would never know if she could forgive you, but you would wait.

you go back to your empty apartment. you would honestly rather be anywhere but here. as you look around, the memories those walls held seem to come to life right in front of you. you almost didn't notice the hot tears rolling down your cheeks.

the way you'd laugh as he spun you around or kissed on countertops. it felt tragic to think about. you often wondered...if things had begun differently, would you have had your happy ending?

it didn't seem to matter anymore. he was gone. you didn't even know where. maybe steve had mentioned him staying with him for a while, but it all felt like a blur. you didn't care where he was if he wasn't here with you.

you cursed yourself for thinking that way. this is for the best, you reminded yourself. but time was sure taking its sweet time erasing him.

your mind wandered back to that night. the night you freaked out on him. the night he left. your hand went up to your heart, trying to hold it together. he probably hated you now. natasha hated you. your friends would never see you the same. and you deserved all of it.

but just for a moment, you had it. the kind of love they say is like magic. the kind that makes your head spin. it really was just the two of you in your own world before that world fell apart.

he called you. just once. you answered, of course.

it ended in a fight.

"just come back home," you begged.

"you wanted space. i'm giving you space," he said harshly.

you rolled your eyes, "you're the one who called me."

"because i still fucking love you. not everyone can just fall out of love at the flip of a switch," he shouted on the other end.

you squeezed your eyes closed as your voice shook, "i never stopped loving you. i never said that."

he continued talking like your words meant nothing to him, "you didn't have to."

"oh my god! would you just try to listen for once!" you cried.

there was a long silence between the two of you.

you took a deep breath and mustered the strength to do what needed to be done. "goodbye, bucky."

he heard a final beep and clenched his jaw as tears pricked his eyes.

it was over.

but then again, how could something be gone if it was never his in the first place?

taglist:

@immyowndefender @ozwriterchick @vicmc624 @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer

[animehideout]

LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE OF THEM ALL

PART 11

Check out part 12 here

Gojo Satoru X Fem! Reader

warnings ⚠️: not proofread / abuse / SA just something vague not detailed.

a/n : I truly apologize for this late update, I was really unmotivated to rewrite it and I was struggling to find inspiration again, I'm sorry if this part didn't live up to your expectations but I read hope you like it though, I tried to make it longer but I ran out of ideas 🥹.

Music Suggestion 🎧

Satoru stood tall, alone in the balcony, his gaze fixated on the sky, lost in the depth if his own thoughts. The weight of regret hung heavy upon his shoulders, a burden he could no longer bear.

His mind played your last fight that night on loop, making him hate himself even more. He remembered his harsh words, actions and disrespect towards you. Forcefully shutting his eyes to make those images and voices that's been haunting him go away.

Unwelcomed thoughts yet impossible to ignore. Blaming himself over and over again for what happened to you, torturing himself to madness.

"It's my fucking fault" he muttered,

In all that darkness, the image of your face in his mind was the only source of light. The delicate curve of your smile whenever you were around your students etched in his memory. He remembered the way you slept, features softened by the gentle embrace of your slumber, your passion for teaching and your daily excitement to show your students a new weapon and new technique.

You were a vision of peace amidst the chaos he was living. He realized then how life became emptier after your disappearance, the void your absence had left in every bit of his life. He realized how much he fell for you, he realized that hatred was deeply buried by the birth of his love for you.

With a heavy heart, he bowed his head, his eyes brimming with unshed tears. For three days, his eyes wide open, unable to sleep without you under the same roof as him, cuddling a piece of your clothing every single night to take into your scent, to pretend that you were there, next to him.

Clutching his fists, his knuckles turned white , whispering a plea for forgiveness, a forgiveness he might never receive.

"I'm sorry Y/n.."

. ..

"Satoru?"

"Y-yaga sensei?" said Gojo wiping his tears away,

"Can I join you?"

"Y-yeah sure"

"What's on your mind? Still blaming yourself?"

"Do I have anything else to do except blaming myself?"

"I'm sorry for your loss Satoru" said Principal Yaga apologetically,

"I didn't lose her, she's still out there, somewhere! I know it, I'm sure of it, I can feel it"

"Pain is eating you up Satoru, you know you should let go already–"

"Let go? Easier said than done. How can all of you let go so fast as if she never existed?" he said in annoyance

"The higher ups orders, to not distract the sorcerers' focus from their daily tasks"

"Bullshit, –"

"Satoru I understand your pain"

"No you don't, none of you does! I did this to her, I built the wall between both of us brick by brick till it collapsed on both of us, she got abducted by Toji and here I am suffering everyday.. I just wish I can turn back time and undo the damage I had done"

"Is this because of regret or something else?" asked Principal Yaga

Gojo looked down, not sure of what to say, mastering the courage he finally spoke,

"I– I love her, sensei! I love Y/n so much, I just hope it's not too late to realize this because I really want to fix everything–"

Yaga sensei looked at Gojo with a reassuring yet sad smile, deep down, everyone accepted that you died except Gojo., and he didn't want him to hang on fake hope.

"Satoru–"

"I know what you're about to say, but I won't let go, I won't give up even if the higher ups chain me down.... I thought she was a curse when we got married but I think I am her curse, I was her curse while she was my blessing–"

"I hope you're right Satoru, I hope she's still out there as you said, I hope you get a second chance to be a real family"

...

*In Mei Mei's room*

"Look at this" said Maki her eyebrows frowning in confusion,

"Who's that in the picture?" asked Nobara as confused as Maki,

Both of them examined the photograph, their eyes flickered between the picture and each other in silence. In the picture a woman smiled serenely as she cradled a baby in her embrace.

Maki shrugged equally perplexed,

"I have no idea, do you think it's a family member?"

Their senses were on high alert as they scanned every corner of her room for any sign of wrongdoing, something out of the ordinary. They found that picture tucked under her bed after they flipped the mattress while searching for anything suspicious.

"And this stack of money? Didn't know she's got all of this cash here" added Nobara.

"And this box as well"

Intrigued, they opened it. As they lifted the lid of the box, a firegun revealed itself, its metallic surface gleaming ominously in the dim light.

"A g-gun?" started Nobara as she looked at Maki in shock, "what would she use it for?"

"Definitely not hers, why would a sorcerer with a jujutsu technique depend on a gun" she pointed out.

"Good point, so if its not hers then to whom does it belong to?" asked Nobara

"There's only one way to figure it out, but now let's take the gun, the damn photograph and get out of here" said Maki as she put he mattress in its place again.

.....

"GOJO-SENSEI" called Nobara out as she caught a glimpse of Gojo in the balcony "Sensei you need to see this"

"Hm? Nobara? Maki?"

"Gojo" said Maki as she saw Gojo with principal Yaga in the balcony "We found something–"

but before she could finish her sentence,

"Any news?" interrupted Mei Mei as she stepped in the balcony out of nowhere..

Maki and Nobara exchanged quick nervous glances, their eyes darting between each other as they attempt to maintain composure. Hiding what they took from her room behind their backs. Their expressions strain with the effort to appear nonchalant, but a subtle tension lingers in the air. Lips pressed into strained smiles,

"Nah nothing new" said Maki while Nobara nodded in agreement.

"Hm you sure about that? I thought I heard you said you found something, is it about Y/n? " asked Mei raising her eyebrows,

"What if we did? Is it really your concern?" exclaimed Maki offensively, only to get elbowed softly by Nobara,

"We found nothing important Mei Mei sensei, of course if we did we'd tell you" exclaimed Nobara, chuckling awkwardly.

"Oh alright then girls," she said luckily not giving too much important to the girls, then paused and drifted her gaze towards Gojo, "how are you holding up Gojo? I hope you're in the process of moving on" she added

Gojo's eyes burned holes in her soul, but he tried to remain calm,

"I'm fine"

"That's what all of us would like to hear, glad you let go" she said and then excused herself to go to her room,

Then moment she left, Maki ran towards Gojo and Yaga, showing them what they found,

"We found these–"

"WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET THESE FROM?" snapped Gojo unexpectedly, his eyes widened as he snatched the gun and photograph form Maki's hands,

"Damn Satoru what's got into you, relax!" exclaimed Yaga-sensei,

"W-we.." stuttered Nobara

"How did you get these? they were well hidden"

"Well hidden under Mei Mei's bed?" asked Maki in confusion

"What? what did you just say?" said Gojo and Yaga in union

"We found these under Mei Mei's bed, the gun hidden in a box , tucked beside that photograph and a pile of cash, do you possibly know to whom it belongs?"

"These belong to Toji Zenin" said Satoru

Maki and Nobara froze in place, trying to process what Gojo just said,

"T-toji?" they said in disbelief,

"This gun was used by Toji to murder Riko Amanai, and these in the picture are Megumi and his mother–" explained Yaga sensei

"It can only be one thing" expressed Gojo through gritted teeth, "She must be behind it" he added and started walking away, thinking about confronting her,

"GOJO STOP!" yelled Yaga sensei, holding Gojo in place, "What's happened to your common sense? vanished?"

"We can't assume anything now sensei!" said Nobara

"So all of this isn't enough to assume that she's got some dirty work with Toji Zenin going on behind our backs?" said Gojo aggressively

"Okay you're right, it is suspicious but we need a plan! a proper plan, do you think she'll admit it if you confront her? she'll find a lie and you'll never find the truth, not out of her! We need to know more about her first" explained Maki

"Know what?" asked Gojo impatiently

"I mean, Toji has nothing right? not even a house, do you think if he'd take Y/n to a hotel room after abducting her? Mei Mei must have provided a place for him" she added

"So if we can't ask her, how would we know?" asked Nobara,

"We ask her best friend" Suggest Maki shrugging,

....

"Is it ringing?" asked Yaga sensei,

"Yeah shh it is" said Gojo waiting for her to pick up the phone, "–Oh hello" he said through the phone

"Gojo? Hi what's up calling me late at night, is everything okay?"

"Utahime, yeah everything is fine, we just need you here, if it's possible can you make here in one hour at least?"

"Well I can, but is it an emergency?"

"Um it's– it's about Mei Mei, we're preparing a party for her and we need your help"

"A party? It's not even her birthday yet–"

"It's for her service, it's a habit here in Jujutsu High to hold a party for a teacher to honor them, and this time it's Mei Mei, she did a lot for us and for the school, besides it's the higher ups orders so..."

"Oh the higher ups? sure then I'll be there in an hour"

"Don't tell Mei Mei that you're coming though, it must remain a surprise, now we don't wanna spoil it"

"So should be meet outside the school?"

"Sure yeah, you can come to my house?!"

"Oh alright then, I'll be there"

With that they hung up the phone,

"She'll be here in one hour, I hope we can get her to talk"

"I hope she's not part of Mei Mei's plan though" Said Nobara.

"Don't you think we must tell the others? Maybe we need some backup?" suggested Maki

"Yeah, but some of them need to stay here to keep an eye on Mei Mei" said principal Yaga

"Alright, I'll go and tell them then,"

*Time skip, at Gojo's house*

They sat there, Gojo, Nanami, Maki and Megumi waiting for Utahime's arrival.

"You've got a nice and big house" pointed Maki

"Yeah but never a happy house" mumbled Gojo to himself,

"Do you think she'll tell us more about her?" asked Megumi and suddenly the bell rang,

"I guess we'll find out now!" said Nanami,

...

"So Utahime, I hope you corporate!" started Gojo not wasting any precious second,

"Corporate? you make it sound like if we're discussing business, and not preparing for a surprise party! it's a p-party right?"

she chuckled nervously,

"Not really! you need to tell us more about Mei Mei, some information that we don't know about"

"wait? what?" she asked nervously

"Is she meeting someone? did she tell you about something?"

"Gojo wait! why are you asking about this? I mean she lives there in the school dorms as well, so I guess you know more than I do"

"I don't think so, she's you're best friend she must have told you something about her plan?" said Maki

"Plan? what plan?"

"Ah come on Utahime dont play dumb"

"No for real! what plan, I thought you had a plan with her , Gojo to push Y/n away!"

"What? NO. I'm talking about her dirty plan with Toji"

"Toji? wait what's going on?" she said truly confused

"STOP LYING AND ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION, IF YOU'RE PART OF HER DIRTY GAME I'LL END BOTH OF YOU" exclaimed Gojo angrily, making Utahime step back, growing more and more impatient.

"Hey hey Gojo calm down, what's wrong with you? I understand you're frustrated but that's not the right way to find answers!" said Maki and the others nodded in agreement,

"Megumi please take him to the balcony while me and Maki handle this, he needs to calm down" suggest Nanami,

Megumi did as he said and took Gojo to get some fresh night air,

"Geez, you really developed anger issues, you were more laid back even in risky situations Gojo" started Megumi

"Not anymore, people change and I've changed"

"Y/n sensei is dear to all of us, so I am eager too to know where she is, and I truly understand how you feel"

"No Gumi, you don't, you don't understand because I'm not just sad, I'm feeling extremely guilty, because it's my damn fault"

"I'm feeling guilty too" said Megumi lowering his head,

"Hm? what for ? you're pretty close to Y/n and you're good friends not only a student and his teacher–"

"It's my father, he's the one who abducted her and only God knows what he's doing to her, I don't wanna even think about it. Is there any greater shame than this?" he said his voice cracking,

"Hey Megumi! look at me, your father's actions has nothing to do with you, he's the one who abducted her not you! you've always been nice and kind to Y/n. Sometimes family does things that we are ashamed of and completely in opposition of it but it doesn't mean we're like them just because we're related by blood, you are what you're truly in here" he said and pointed at Megumi's heart "And I know well what's in there Megumi! I raised you and I've seen you grow up to be a loyal, strong and kind hearted man! you're the complete opposite of your father so don't ever compare yourself to him again" said Gojo with a smile,

"If it's his fault, then why are you blaming yourself Gojo?"

"Because I'm the reason she left that night! I've said too many hurtful words, no one can handle to hear, no one deserves to hear but I was too agitated, too overwhelmed by my mixed feelings, trying to push her away from me over and over again–"

"Why? why'd you push her away from you? couldn't you have tried at least? maybe after what you've been through you were destined to finally find happiness with her! "

"My heart was a messy place to make it a comfortable place for her!"

"Was? so what changed now?"

"I want to try to make it comfortable for both of us, I want t-t to– nevermind! I have to find her, I have to make it up for her"

"I understand and we will find her, Y/n is strong I'm sure she's safe wherever she is" reassured Megumi, trying to lift Gojo's spirit again,

....

"So Utahime, we really need you to corporate so you better put that bestie thing with Mei Mei aside cuz this is a life or death matter!" begun Maki,

"D-death?"

"Toji escaped and we think that Mei Mei had a hand in this" added Nanami

"No way! Why would Mei Mei do that? I mean you know what Toji had done to the Jujutsu world!"

"We know, but we know that when people are full of hate are full of unexpected things!"

"Nanami what's wrong? what happened?"

"It's Y/n! Toji abducted her, and we found Toji's gun under Mei Mei's bed, even though it was well hidden.. do you still think she's got nothing to do with that?"

Her eyes wide open in shock and disbelief, her mouth hanging open, sad expressions drawn on her face,

"W-what? I didn't know I swear to God! I've – I've never thought it will go that way, I've never thought she could fall this far" she expressed her feelings, her heart crushing, she's never expected her long time best friend would do or be part of such thing, to betray the Jujutsu community.

"That's why we need your help! You know how important Y/n is to our world! we can't lose her" said Nanami "So please if you know anything, any place she owns, any small details tell us, we really need to know"

With a deep breath, she started thinking, trying to remember if Mei Mei told her anything,

"I remember she bought a house! but that was weeks ago!!"

"A house?"

"Yeah, she said she might settle in Tokyo if things went well between her and Gojo–"

"She's truly delusion" interrupted Maki rolling her eyes,

"Where is this house?" asked Nanami

"I'll take you there" said Utahime determined to help.

Despite being best friends with Mei Mei, her morals were more important! she's too loyal to the Jujutsu World and committed to the greater good, she knows about the prophecy and she can't afford to witness another loss on the Jujutsu community part.

"I'll go and tell Gojo and Megumi then– maybe Y/n is there"

.......

[ Kill her, and I'll bring your cash tomorrow when I see her lifeless body ]

Read Toji through the message that he received,

"See! I'm ordered to kill you now! How much trouble did you cause her for her to free me from the prison just to torture you and kill you" he said with a smirk

"F-fuck you and fuck her" you said through gritted teeth as you were thrown on the floor, your body hurting from the chains that were tied around your wrists and feet.

your lips and nose bleeding after hours of tortures,

"And you still got that attitude, after being beaten up? If I were you I wouldn't act so brave.."

"You'll never be me Toji! we're both considered inferior in the Jujutsu world but I learned how to be the real me and not what others want me to be, I didn't let others to order me around and kill people–"

"Are you trying to save yourself? and convince me to not kill you"

"no, I know I can't be saved, not just now but for a long time ago, but you know the funny thing is that we actually have something else in common beside being monkeys" you joked offensively trying to get on his nerves, you're going to die anyway so why'd you not offend him, you were tired if being stepped on so why not talk back.

"what?" he said in anticipation as he kneeled down,

"Both our families are disappointed in us, I disappointed my parents and you disappointed your son, Megumi, nice kid he's nothing like you–"

"M-megumi?"

And you struck a sensitive nerve in him,

You started laughing when you saw his face dropped and his expressions changed, your stomach hurts whenever you laughed he probably had broken some of yours ribs.

The you paused,

"Do it Toji. Do what you were assigned for, no one will come to my rescue anyway, do it, kill me" you said in a serious tone,

"Change in plan, let me have my fun with you before I take the light out of your eyes"

"You still have time for fun? the dawn will break soon–"

"Oh I know princess, don't you worry about it, I know I can't delay the sunlight but I know how to make the night even more darker... and you were right, Megumi's probably disappointed in me but lemme tell you something–" he paused and leaned forward, his face a few inches away from yours "That's who I truly am, a beast that preys on the weak, and you are weak Y/n no matter how hard you try to come off as strong"

he said and he reached to take off your shirt,

Your heart beats quickened, you thought he'd torture you in another way, and not attempt to do something filthy to you,

"No -no! I'd rather die" you said trying your best to break free from his grasp, but his huge body got you pinned down,

"What? you're not a fan of big guys? or your pathetic ass is loyal to a husband who's never paid attention to your existence?" he said looking you deep in the eyes, his huge hands circling around your neck, posing pressure on it,

You couldn't deny the pain and disappointment you felt. You really hoped Gojo would appear and save you, you wished he cared for you. You couldn't deny that you wanted Gojo; your husband to be your first time and not with someone who would brutally kill you after taking what he wants.

You'd die even before he kills you.

"no don't " you whispered, loosing your voice as his grip around your neck tightened, making it hard to breathe.

....

"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER"

All what you can feel is the weight of Toji's body being removed from on top of you.

Toji's body forcefully thrown on the ground, your blurry eyes trying to focus on the figure standing right in front of you, slowly approaching you,

"Damn baby what did he do to you?" he said softly, softly brushing his finger over your bleeding lip.

"S-satoru, y-you came!" you whispered, your vision darkening and ears ringing,

"Of course I'm here with you, Y/n! Y/N !!!!!no no Y/N WAKE UP" he yelled as he held you in his arms.

....

Your eyes slowly fluttered opened, your surroundings sharpening into details again, gulping with difficulty.

A serum attached to your vein,

"Sensei" said Yuji "Guys she's awake"

With that all of them circled around the bed you were laying on, their eyes look directly at you, greeting you with sincere smiles.

"How are you feeling?" asked Megumi.

You tried to leave the bed but they forced you to lay back. You looked around scanning the place, you were in the hospital, Shoko must have treated your wounds, everyone was there except your husband, Satoru.

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[fangisms]

all of the girls you loved

A/N: i am a SUCKER for a good song fic and obvi a sucker for some good Taylor content (gif creds: @merakiaes)

Pairings: George Weasley x Fem!Reader

Summary: Every woman that he knew brought him here. You want to teach him how forever feels. 2.6k words.

Warnings: so much crying why am i in a mood, fluff mostly!, song fic, song lyrics, pet names (poppet, dear), heartbreak, brief angst, ONE FUCKING CURSE WORD. jealousy, being stood up

1984

"your mother brought you up loyal and kind"

You'd been chasing the little red haired boy through the train station for the better part of the last ten minutes. But only because he tugged at your hair and stuck his tongue out at you. He started it. He's got this worn grey sweater, and you can tell his jeans were hand-me-downs from the patchwork in the knees. Probably from the boy, his older brother, with the wavy red hair carrying far too many books and stumbling up the train's steps.

Your antagonist giggles and ducks behind the brick pillar in the center of the station. You roll your eyes and round the otherside, tapping on his shoulder with a grin. He yelps and skitters away behind his mother. She has a small baby tucked in her arm and another cooing from a pram decorated with ribbons, lace, and wicker.

"Georgie!" She scolds him for tugging on her skirt before looking down to see your little face staring back at her. "Hello, dear, what's your name?"

The boy peeks his head out from behind her leg, round cheeks flushed a soft pink from all the running. You fold your arms over your chest and scowl at him.

"Determined little thing, aren't you?" she says with a sweet smile and kind eyes, "Have you been terrorizing this young lady?"

"It's not my fault, mum! She looks funny!"

"George. That's not how we talk about other people, now, is it?" she warns.

"No, mum."

"No, of course it's not. Now, you apologize this instant. Your brothers give me enough grief as is."

His wicked gaze meets yours, and you scowl hard as you can back at him. He squints. You purse your lips.

"I'm sorry because my mum told me so!"

You pout, "apology not accepted! I hope I never see you again!"

And with that, he watched the little girl with the wild hair and the polka-dotted pinafore skip away. Never to be seen again. Until the next year. And each year following the last.

1994

"teenage love taught you there's good in goodbye"

George has got a mouth full of the loudest bubblegum in existence when he comes roaring up behind you in the hallway, laying his arm across your shoulders.

"Evening, poppet. I assume you've heard the news," he chirps, smacking his gum in your ear proudly.

"You're disgusting, George," you say, shrugging his arm away but still matching his pace, "and I don't care that you bribed Niamh Ward into being your date to the Yule Ball."

"I didn't bribe her! She asked me and I said 'yes'"—he blows a gummy bubble in your face, and it bursts with a ringing pop—"D'you reckon she'll kiss me if I dance well enough?"

He twirls off down the hallway, ending his mini routine with a flourish of jazz hands.

"I don't reckon any girl will ever want to kiss you with moves like that."

"Oh, you're just a cynic. I'm perfectly snoggable, whether I can dance or not." He takes your wrist and drapes your arm in the crook of his own, and you scoff when he leans in to pop another bubble in your face. "Who's taking you to the ball, anyway? That Durmstrang halfwit?"

You yank your arm away and stop dead in your tracks. It's a well-known fact that you'd been waiting for George to ask you to the Yule Ball since first year. You thought for sure he'd ask you. But the time came and went and you each found other dates, other outfits, other plans. And you hate that deep down, a small part of you is still waiting for him to ask you. But you'd never do that to Niamh. Not even for George.

"As a matter of fact, yes," you say, "and his name is Johan—"

"What kind of name is Johan?"

He's still smacking his gum like he knows exactly how to get on your nerves. And after all these years, it's no wonder.

"You're so immature. I'll see you later."

"Oh, come on—"

"No, George," you huff, not turning around until you clear the corner and wipe your wet cheek with the sleeve of your robes.

...

The Great Hall has never looked more decadent. Draped in glitz and the magic of the holidays. Everyone's absolutely buzzing with excitement, ever-present gossip, and the beauty of students dressed to the nines. And in the midst of it all, you still spot him from across the room.

Of course, Johan is the perfect gentleman. He even asked if you'd like to match your gown to his traditional red dress robes. It was a lovely idea, and it wasn't hard to pick out a lovely chiffon, maroon dress. He said you looked beautiful and danced with you most of the night, but there was still that sickly ache in your chest like flesh and tendon left split by two cold hands. George's hands.

After you told Johan you didn't feel well, he left you alone at one of the shimmering tables. You felt bad practically leading him on, but it's not like you'd been lying about your attraction to him. Just about your attraction to George.

You don't turn to face the person who plops onto the stool beside you. You're pretty dedicated to flicking the thin straw around the rim of your glass at this point.

"I left my date to come talk to you, so you better have a stellar reason for looking so glum."

George. You know he's trying to cheer you up. And he knows it's not exactly working how he'd hoped. "Come on, poppet. It's the Yule Ball. You've been looking forward to this for, what, six years?"

He hates that when you turn to face him, you've got tears dripping from your chin, jaw, nose, lashes. He hates that there's a small part of him that wishes he could have fixed it for you. 

"What's wrong?" he whispers, scooting closer and catching a slow tear slipping over your cheekbone. You flinch away and lean your head in your hand, closing your eyes.

"You have no idea."

George chortles and shrugs, "well, yeah. That's sort of why I'm asking." You land a hearty wallop on his arm, not even looking when you swing your fist at him. "Alright, that was deserved. Now, tell me. I don't like it when you shut me out."

"Why are you doing this, George? Why don't you just leave me alone? Go hang out with Niamh or something," you say. It's accusatory, sure, but that's the point. The inflection was aimed for the heart. Spear tipped with arsenic just to make it sting more.

He chews the inside of his cheek, rubbing the back of his neck when you dodge his gaze and sniffle.

"That might be a tad difficult seeing how she stood me up."

Shit.

"George, I didn't mean—"

"No, no, it's okay. She caught a... a stomach bug, or something. Spent all morning hunched over the girl’s toilet," he mumbles, loosening his tie. And you catch just the smallest smirk tugging the corner of his mouth. Like there's some kind of amusement in his own misery. "I feel bad for her, honestly."

"I'm so sorry, I had no idea." You grab his hand and lean closer. He looks tired up close. Like the light usually at home in his eyes as twinkled out and left him dimmed.

"You've nothing to be sorry for. Fate is fate, after all." He brushes his hair out of his face and takes a deep breath, squeezing your hand. "Dance with me?"

Yes, of course, you want to shriek. I'd love nothing more from the boy who used to yank on my hair and call me names and tell me he loved my sparkly shoes. An honor, you think, but the words don't reach. Just a smile.

"Sure," you say, letting him tug you in the direction of the crowd. The right direction, you think, the direction you've longed for. Then he spins you into his chest, and you feel the shallow rumble of his laugh in your fingertips.

"Was Johan a better dancer than me?" he says, swaying your bodies like tender obligation. You cock an eyebrow.

"Johan stepped on my toes every four steps and nearly tore my dress."

"...So?"

"Yes," you tease.

"Shut up. Let me make this dance a good one. For you."

You look up at him and he thinks he's never seen someone look so clueless and yet so completely beautiful. From the gloss on your lips to the gems on your shoes and even now, mascara smudged and hands shaky, he thinks he'd like to look at you for as long as you'll let him. And when you shuffle closer between songs, he has to catch his breath against your temple.

"Your hair's gotten so long, Georgie," you whisper, slipping your hand up and over his shoulder, to the back of his neck with a smile pressed to his warm cheek.

"Like it?"

"I’ll always like it."

He pleads to Merlin you can't feel the rattletrap pounding of his heart. His hand moves of its own volition, spread across the small of your back like he's seen in some romance films. The slow dance scene is always the most romantic. The pinnacle of their love thus far. The event to dissolve any prejudice leftover in their heads, and any pride hidden in the last cracks in their hearts.

"George, I have to tell you something important—"

"Shh, poppet, just dance with me a little longer."

And you suppose. It could wait that little while longer. Another dance. Another day. It'd come up again and break your heart, but it'd be too pressing to put off eventually.

So you let him hold your hand a little tighter, sway you in circles a little slower, and keep your heart beating a little louder.

1996

"every woman that you knew brought you here // i wanna teach you how forever feels"

The something important you had tried to tell George that night was that you'd be staying with your estranged aunt in Spain over the course of the next school year. Your final school year. You'd be leaving Hogwarts—leaving George—and spending the year homeschooling over in Spain.

You left that Spring to spend your days in the Spanish countryside, drinking in the sunshine and dancing to the music of the cicadas. It had devastated George. It had devastated all of the Weasleys. They were so used to housing you most summers, and the change was quite unwelcome. Less place settings, less baggage clunking up the stairs, less laughter. He could only hope you were happy. And that he'd be able to see you again one day in the future.

"Georgie?"

You caught him off guard. He nearly tripped and cracked a tooth on the steps when you called his name. He and his twin brother had made a spectacle of Ninety-three Diagon Alley in the time you'd been away. And you had just happened to wander in and find him hurrying up the technicolor stairs after his brother.

Nothing felt real when he met your eyes for the first time in a year and change. The sirens and bells and sparklers went fuzzy as he realized just how beautiful you'd gotten since he last saw you. Beautiful enough to make him wildly nervous. Enough to make him sweat.

"My Poppet." He says it gently, grinning when you bat your lashes and hold your arms out.

"Christ, I've missed you, George," you huff, burying your face in his shoulder when he wraps his arms around you.

"You have no idea."

You tease him with a laugh, "Well, yeah," pulling away to wrap your lithe fingers around his tie. "Look at your hair! It's so short!"

"Like it?" He runs his fingers through the scruff at the back of his head. You squint and pat the soft tufts at the top of his head.

"I love it. You know I do."

He sighs, ushering you to the back of the shop all while trying to conceal a giddy smile.

"I've had an entire year to reflect on all the reasons why you abandoned me, poppet. I made a list"—He takes your wrist and drapes your arm in the crook of his own—"Starting with that time I told you your unicorn shirt was quote, unquote, 'for babies'."

"You have to include my stunning defense, Weasley"—you clear your throat—"'I am a baby, and you're just a rotten little boy!'"

"How could I forget?" He pushes open a door to the very neglected office towards the back of the building. Papers stacked on the desk, a cobweb in the corner. Well-loved. "A little privacy, mademoiselle?"

"I'd be delighted."

He sweeps the dust off a brown leather chair by the desk, offering the seat to you with a shy smile.

"Oh, George," you whisper, fiddling with the clasp of your purse with watery eyes and a pout like the one you gave him the first time he saw you.

"Come here, sweetheart," he says, hurrying you into his embrace with the feeling of being gutted by your sad eyes weighing heavy on him.

"There's just so much"—you gasp and cover your mouth when you sob—"So much I've missed and so much I want to tell you and so much I wish I had seen and done with you..."

"I know. I know, I feel the same," he huffs, "I missed you more than words can describe. I didn't know what to do with myself."

"I'm so sorry, I never meant to hurt you, I thought—"

"No. No, poppet, of course not"—he holds you tighter, pressing you to the curves of his body, holding you like clay and hot glass—"You came back, that's all I could ever ask for."

You pull back and let him wipe the tears from your cheeks, leaving faint kisses on each temple. And when he finally tears himself away from your skin, he's only left desperate for the contact. His thumb brushes you cheek, and you hold his wrist, lashes fluttering to meet his soft gaze. Desperation. Exhaustion. Relief. It's all there in the palm of your hand, and just at his fingertips.

Twelve years is far too long to be loving anyone the way you love each other. Completely but without the parts of love we sometimes need most. The honesty and openness, the comfort, and more than ever, the kisses. He curses his wild eyes for sweeping the length of your parted lips. His wild eyes giving away his secrets and calling him a damned fool.

You catch his mouth with yours, innocent at first peck, but he kisses you back, unsure of where his hands should go, wanting perfection, especially when your nose bumps his and makes you smile into the wetness of the kisses.

"I want everything," you whisper, forced to choose between air and George, "I have loved you since the day we met."

"That's very cheesy, my dear." He rests his forehead against yours, cupping the side of your neck, thumb resting gingerly over the column of your throat. Just to hold something delicate. Fragile. His.

"Think you can do better?"

"Hmm," he clears his throat, "You stole my heart and... I don't think I want it back."

"Gross! You win."

"I meant it."

He winks and pecks your bottom lip sweetly, only to realize you're tearing up, head tilted back and hands fanning at your eyes. He holds your waist and you shake your head with a defeated laugh.

"I'm such a crybaby."

"My favorite."

"You're awful, Georgie."

"I know," he says, finally, "I know."

masterlist

[mxqlss]

BETTY. — LH43

Sypnosis: In which, Luke realizes how he misses reader after cheating on her in August and now has to deal with trying to get you back.

Pairing: Luke Hughes x Reader (Song-wise: Betty)

jess’ song choice:

September of 2020.

Betty, I won't make assumptions About why you switched your homeroom, but I think it's cause of me

Luke sat in class, listening to the teacher speak until he noticed reader wasn't in the room. With that he raised his hand "Uhm, Miss where is Y/N?" he asked in confusion as to why she wasn't there.

"Ms. L/N has switched homeroom classes, she will no longer be in this class anymore," she said as Luke's eyes widened. He knew exactly why she switched classes after that, he knew he fucked up big time but he didn't think that she would switch classes because of it.

You heard the rumours from Inez You can't believe a word she says Most times, but this time, it was true

Everyone was whispering around her. Luke always wondered why, because every time they whispered to her they always pointed at him. Till he found out that everyone knew about what he did this summer.

He looked around him to which he found Y/N's eyes staring right at him, her eyes looking glassy and her lips trembling, once her eyes met Luke's she turned around and walked away.

Luke always tried to find a way to talk to her with no one else around them but everytime he would see her she would end up walking the opposite way from him, completely ignoring him at all costs.

But if I just showed up at your party Would you have me? Would you want me? Would you tell me to go fuck myself

Luke sat in his room in the middle of November with a box in front of him. A box he wanted to give her for her 17th birthday. It was filled with memories of them and her favourite things like candy and things they did together, along with a letter to her about how much he loved her.

He kept contimplating wether he should go or not, he wanted to go but he didn't think she would want him there after what he did. She kept ignoring him at school so why would he go? What would she say to him if he showed up at her doorstep? Tell him to go fuck himself? Would she want him there to begin with?

In the garden would you trust me If I told you it was just a summer thing? I'm only seventeen, I don't know anything But I know I miss you

Luke sat up from his bed and walked over to his shelf with memories and gifts from you that he kept as his trophies. In his head he kept asking himself why he did it when he was with her. As tears started to stream down his face he knew he fucked up big time and deep down he knows he misses her and loves y/n so much.

As Luke took deep breaths and wiped the tears off his face he yet again contemplated wether he should go or not, looking back at the gift he had for her. He wanted to go to her house so bad and just hug her and kiss her telling her how much he hated being away from her and how he hated what he did to you. He knew as a seventeen-year-old he didn't know what he was doing and for infact he knew nothing at all about how to love.

It affected him so bad that it interfered with his hockey. Making him mess up every game and practice, listening to his coaches yell at him not understanding how he went from becoming a great player to a messy and unorganized one, and even dealing with his brothers telling him how bad he's fucked up and how it affected him so bad he had to do something about it sooner.

Betty, I'm here on your doorstep And I planned it out for weeks now But it's finally sinkin' in

Luke stood there staring at the door in front of him. The door he would go to every few nights to take his girl to dinners and dates or even to hang out with her at her house. It finally sank in that he was there, holding her gift in hand as he rang the doorbell while loud music was playing in the house that you could hear it from outside.

It took him weeks to convince himself to go to her house, even if it meant for her to yell and scream at him to get out or go away and never contact her or approach her at all.

Betty, right now is the last time I can dream about what happens when You see my face again The only thing I wanna do Is make it up to you

As the door opened, his gaze caught hers. She was wearing one of his favourite dresses he had bought for her. In his favourite colour. She stared at him briefly, wondering why he had come to her door.

"Luke.. you showed up?.." she asked, tears starting to form in her eyes. He let out a deep breath and nodded. "Yeah, uhm.. here's your birthday gift. Happy birthday, Y/N" he let out one of his smiles, making her heart break even more. As she examined his face, she noticed his features, all the baggy eyes and puffy bloodshot eyes.

Luke had done the same and noticed how her face looked like she had been crying for the past month not getting much sleep. It had both affected them like crazy. They had both missed each other's simple gestures they would do for each other.

Behind Y/N was a picture frame of both of them, sitting at the lake house one year. Jack had taken the picture and sent it to his mom and her mom where they had both printed the picture and had it in their houses.

"You still have the photo framed.." Luke smiled softly again, making Y/N nod and give one of the smallest smiles. "Yeah, It never left that spot," she said as she looked behind her and back at him, tears now running down her face

Yeah, I showed up at your party Will you have me? Will you love me? Will you kiss me on the porch In front of all your stupid friends?

Luke and Y/N were now on the porch with the door still wide open, tears streaming down their faces as they talked. Luke had wiped his tears before wiping hers leaving his hand resting on her cheek. Her hand held the hand on her cheek, melting into his soft touch.

They both kept on talking and comforting each other till Luke had to leave as he had practice in the morning. As his hand left her cheek, she began to feel lost without his touch and him to guide her like he always did, they were perfect but it's always the right person wrong time.

As he began to leave he just wanted to feel her lips against his one last time, would it always be the same kiss he dreamed of when he kissed her? He stood there facing away from her before turning to face her again, she stood there as she watched him leave. Watching the one she wanted to marry and be with for the rest of her life walk away.

If you kissed me, will it be just like I dreamed it? Will it patch your broken wings? I'm only seventeen, I don't know anything But I know I miss you

"I hope you know, I miss you.."

"I miss you too, Lukey."

authors note!

I thought of this today and finished today.. which was kinda odd but it’s whatever! I hope you liked it since its my first time writing something like this instead of insta posts!

I have more works but im trying to perfect them so its good and not all choppy like this one! Overall I hope you liked this! If not, thats okay!

xoxo jess

[dawnoftime22]

sensory.

| T.S

Warnings: slight sensory problems, self soothing by wearing accessories (watch, bracelet), and sitting on the floor

Summary: It was a planned date day for you and Taylor, but you had seemed off the entire day, until a realization comes across that you were missing something.

Word Count: 2.7k

Category: fluff, comfort

A/N: I am once more, not a professional, I'm only writing this from my own experience :]

| Started on 29/04/2024, 2:10 PM |

| Finished on 06/07/2024, 11:40 PM |

Main Masterlist | T.S Masterlist

seven days of comfort.

"To be loved is to be cared for."

|——————————— ⸆⸉ ———————————|

Sun streams into the room with the gentle look of the curtain lining, sending light in to illuminate the glass vases that held any flowers, a beautifully mixed bunch given from you to Taylor, or from her to you.

You let out an exhilarated sigh, staring up at the living room ceiling. Your arm hung off the side of the couch, and the other was on your stomach.

As you count the ceiling lights, you feel the air entering your lungs when you take a deep breath in, and you let it out as a slow exhale. Something was off. But you couldn't place on what it was. Yet, no amount of deep breaths could help you relax.

You felt too light. Almost...too free. The wind touching your skin was too cold, but if you covered yourself up with a blanket or jacket, it would be too warm.

Your hand ran over your face, bothered by it all. Even the urge to simply roll over the couch would not fix the problem. Oh well. You definitely did not do that, but you did roll to your side, your eyes searching the entire room.

The tv on the wall was on, playing an animal documentary. It showed videos of orcas, penguins, lions, and toucans. It got you transfixed upon it for a few minutes, but then you had started trailing off your gaze to your hands, or the small patterns on the wood of the coffee table.

You take a look to the windows, but then saw the absolute brightness of them from the sunlight, so you grimaced and squinted your eyes, quickly looking away from it.

The black spots that scattered on your vision from being blinded needed to be blinked away, and you focus on the floor instead, a small huff escaping you.

Once you got your vision back to normal, you were back in reality. It was then, you realized another thing. It was awfully quiet. The space was only filled up by the commentary on the tv, explaining the description and facts of a sea turtle.

Not that you hated it, you just couldn't focus on anything specific, and it frustrated you. You weren't even bored, it was just...like you were floating. In a bad way. Every position you change into on the couch wasn't enough to satisfy a comfortable feeling either.

Meanwhile, Taylor was in the bedroom, getting ready for your date, sincr it was getting nearer to the time you both had planned for. You already got ready after breakfast, so now you were only waiting for her.

One of the cats, Meredith, jumps up to the couch, curling up next to you. You raise your eyebrows curiously and props yourself up in a sitting position using your arm, seeing Benjamin over by the edge of the carpet, perhaps having been asking her to play with him. But Meredith craved some laziness more than playfulness, so she joins you.

Olivia? Olivia was nowhere to be seen, but she could very well possibly be in one of the other rooms, or in the bedroom with Taylor.

You reach out your hand, and the cat's nose goes near it, sniffing it lightly before you were accepted to pet her. The fur was soft. So soft. Now this, this could be something you can do forever without breaking focus, but that could be because it didn't really need any at all.

Since the couch was starting to make your body ache, you decided to switch to sitting down on the floor. Your back goes against the couch, and your legs moved into a comfortable position.

When you've settled yourself down, your hand reaches up to pet Meredith again, but now it was a stretch to reach her. The scottish fold also didn't seem to move from her current position, so you gave up on trying to pet her again.

In your luckiness though, Benjamin came to save you with his black brown-ish ears by padding over to you and flopping on the floor in front of you, his floof of a belly in visible view.

He gratefully took the way your hand gently ran through his soft fur, and he presses his head into your palm when you got closer to it. The action lightened your heart, and you smile softly, for once getting some type of relief from what you seemed to be missing.

As you were caught up with Benjamin and his fluffy body, over in the distance of your bedroom, Taylor had finished getting ready. Her steps were quiet as she went into the living room, in search for you.

Her eyebrows furrowed when she didn't see you on the couch or the kitchen, a little curiosity setting off in her, but just as she set her arms on the back of the couch, she finds you sitting on the floor, your hand in Benjamin's fur.

Finding such a sweet sight had warmed her heart, and her lips raise up as she gazes at you. You didn't know she was there at all, and you were utterly adoring the little cat, your touch gentle as it purred.

Taylor sees the tv being on, the animal documentary still present upon the screen. She blinks and trails her eyes back down to you, the smallest worry swelling in her heart. She knew you mostly only kept it on when you really needed it in the struggle of anxiety, or wanted comfort, but she decides to not question it for now.

The gentle rattle of some keys led you to turn and look behind you. In your vision, appears the blonde you were waiting for. You could see the softness her gaze holds, just the same as the one you held on the cat you're petting, which now had its eyes closed.

"You ready, or do we have to grab Benjamin with us?" Taylor asks, a giggle softly sounding out from her as she pushes herself away from the couch.

A bright smile quickly raises up on your face and you giggled too, moving to stand up, needing to reluctantly leave Benjamin laying on the floor, who was quite possibly descending slowly into a nap.

You bit your lip, taking one last look at Benjamin before going to your girlfriend. "...Buut...can we sneak him into the restaurant?" You ask, making your way to her. Taylor's eyes flicker from Benjamin's sleepy pose, then to you, a smile gracing her lips.

She shook her head gently, "No, baby," she chuckles, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you closer as she looks at the cat once more. "And he'd be more comfortable here."

You hum softly, your gaze lingering, before you bury your face in her shoulder and your arms wrap around her waist in a side hug. The nuzzle she felt was gentle, but it was one for comfort.

She stares down for a moment, unable to see your face. But her expression had faded into a gentle look of concern. A small somber hum from you like that wasn't something she could just ignore.

It couldn't be because of Benjamin, since you were usually fine with having the cats at home unless it was a big trip or vacation. But today was just a date out. And she couldn't help but let her eyes wander on the tv that showed the animals.

There were currently penguins on the screen, sliding across ice and waddling on the snow, and as much as she wanted to look at it or point it out to you, she can feel your pout in her shoulder, and she instinctively wraps her arms around you, looking down at you.

"...Hey...you okay?" she whispers softly just above your ear, her hand rubbing up and down your arm. You fiddle with her shirt, your fingers brushing across the fabric. Taylor's mind takes note of it, and she tilts her head, peeking at your eyes that didn't seem to make eye contact.

You start off in a hushed, quiet tone. "I don't know...I just feel so..." You trail off, trying to find the words to it. But there was not a single word that could describe it. You simply felt off.

Your shoulders tensed and you let out a breath. "I can't describe it." The slump in your stance against her was a clear sign of your defeat at trying to explain. Her eyes soften, and she smiles gently, her hand continuing its soothing motion.

Now, as her eyes trail over your appearance to figure out what was wrong, she starts to notice something. You were indeed missing something. Your hands were empty of any accessories you'd usually wear. Or any part of you, really.

It seems you had gotten entirely too focused on waking up and being on time for the date, that you had completely forgotten to grab your usual things. No wonder you couldn't see why you felt off. You hadn't even realized it yet.

Taylor thinks about it for a moment, but doesn't tell you just yet. Her hand on your arm goes down to your wrist, feeling it to be empty and seeing it being, yes, indeed bare of anything when she pulls back.

She breathes out a chuckle. It was simply a silly situation, but she leans down and kisses the top of your head as you look up at her, confused as to what made her huff out a laugh.

Your wireless headphones; She had seen you charge it last night, and your watch was left on the nightstand. She smiles softly, then led you to the front of the couch, having you sit down.

"Wait here," Taylor says, giving your hand a squeeze before walking off back to the bedroom, leaving you blinking at her vagueness.

You waited patiently, yet curiously, your eyes traveling to the doorway of your bedroom, but the wall was concealing what she was grabbing, so, instead you watched Benjamin sleeping until she came back.

The wooden floorboards of your home gently creaks when Taylor comes back, walking towards you with just a few footsteps, her heart light with love and care.

"Here, love," she said quietly, standing in front of you. In her hands, she reveals that she had brought you your watch, your headphones, and some...friendship bracelets?

She held your items carefully, making sure they don't fall. Your eyes widen in realization at the sight, and her smile grows wider, glad that the problem came to light easily.

"Oh...thank you," you whispered, looking up at her gratefully and grabbing them one by one, wearing your watch first, making sure it was on correctly. Not too loose, but not too tight.

She watches as you slide on the bracelets, and you notice each of them have a different tightness or heaviness to them, so you had a way of choosing which one you wanted on your wrist, or none at all, to which she didn't mind whichever you chose, only wanting you to be comfortable.

When you moved your hand, it made a light and quiet sound of the bracelets hitting each other, and you were in absolute awe, your mouth opening as you look at your wrist in surprise, then to Taylor, who giggled at the sight of you now moving your hand up and down to hear the light clinks. You had tried the bracelets before, but it was only one of them, so it wasn't much of a surprise.

She moves her hand up to the bracelets, hovering right over it as you pause your movements. She looks to you to see you smiling at her, and she continues on with her movement, her finger stretching one of the bracelets slightly, just enough so that the string keeping the beads together was visible, and she shows that you can slide the beads across the string; a small bonus fidget of sort with the accessory.

You, on the other hand gasped again. Taylor pulls her hands away, letting you try it out. The beads did slide across the string when you stretched the bracelet, and would go to whichever side you tilted it to.

Then, the headphones, she helped you by putting your hair back from your ears and placing it on your head. She makes sure it was connected to your phone afterwards, putting on some gentle music. Nothing too loud or upbeat in case it would interfere.

Taylor checks on your face, and sees how its grown brighter, your grounding items being rightfully back to where they belonged. You were adjusting things here and there, but she was happy you were feeling like yourself again.

She also had given you your earphones for a choice, just in case the headphones on your head felt like it was putting too much pressure. Your heart was almost about to burst at the amount of care and thought she gave to you.

"Feeling better?" she asks with a gentle gaze. Her hands were now on your shoulders as she smiles, hoping you can ease back into the world again.

You nodded gently, and relief flows into her that she was right. You always needed something to keep ahold of you, to steady you, and have you grounded for anything that could easily poke your nerves. Which is why you always took them off during nighttime; for the sake of letting go and to melt into being relaxed. But you forgot to put them back on this morning.

You smile back at her, speaking up again for once. "...I love you," you whispered, gently moving to pull her into a slow hug with your arms wrapped around her waist.

She feels the fuzzy loving feeling grow in herself, her arms going up to your shoulders to return the embrace. "I love you, too, sweetheart." She replied back, having just as much softness as you did. Her lips meet the top of your head in a loving kiss, hoping it'll help calm you down further.

"Are you ready to go, or do you wanna stay?" she asks softly, pulling back just slightly to look at you, her eyes searching yours in case you still felt like you needed to relax.

"It's okay if you wanna stay, love." She said quietly, caressing your cheek with the back of her hand. You were about to melt into a pool of puddle right in front of her with her touch and gentle voice.

"Of course, I'm going...its date day..." You say, and Taylor's eyes squeeze in happiness with her smile. You mirror her expression, moving up to kiss her on the cheek.

She smiles even wider and returns the gesture softly, her lips lingering before she gently pulls you up to stand next to her an lead you to the front door.

"Just tell me if you need anything else, okay?" She says, glancing back at you as you follow her. She holds the keys in her hand, ready to lock the front door once you were out and open the car.

"I will, baby," you whisper, your gaze on her gentle as you look at her with pure adoration, your heart full with love for her.

In the car, on the way to the date, You gently play with the bracelets in your passenger seat, seatbelt buckled in and Taylor driving steadily.

Taylor looks over to your side when she could, seeing the movement. She smiles softly, glad they could elicit some kind of comfort for you, especially since one of them was actually given by a fan, and one was made by her.

The date goes on without another problem, only with loving conversations and soft laughter.

---------------------

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[wavesoutbeingtossed]

What do you think has been the most telling lyric from each of Taylor's albums? Not necessarily the best summary of the album, but the most honest blurt out.

Like I'd say "We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time" is a great line to summarise Red, but the most telling lyric imo would be something like "I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it"

Anon, this is SUCH a good question!!! I love it!!! I loved it so much I've been thinking about it all day since I first saw the ask this morning! This is totally my jam but it definitely required some thought, which was hard to do between work and the plague eating away at my brain right now.

Debut: "And you're tied together with a smile, but you're coming undone."

Fearless: "'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them." Not just when you're fifteen.

Speak Now: "Wish I'd never grown up."

Red: I completely agree with "I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it." If we're including the vault tracks in hindsight, I think "will you still want me when I'm nothing new?" may be a close second.

1989: "The water filled my lungs, I screamed so loud but no one heard a thing." I think "If they call me a slut, you know it might be worth it for once" is also a close second.

Reputation: "It was the great escape, the prison break, the light of freedom on my face / But you weren't thinking and I was just drinking," although I concede that that one is slightly fictionalized. So if we're going with more overtly diaristic lines... "And I know I make the same mistakes every time / Bridges burn, I never learn / At least I did one thing right."

Lover: "And I cut off my nose just to spite my face / Then I hate my reflection for years and years."

Folklore: "Pulled the car off the road to the lookout, could've followed my fears all the way down."

Evermore: "And I was catching my breath, barefoot in the wildest winter catching my death / And I couldn't be sure, I had a feeling so peculiar that this pain would be forevermore." I've actually got a few other considerations for evermore but it's going to be too long and in the weeds.

Midnights: This one was really tough because there are a few excellent options but I think, "You wouldn't take my word for it if you knew who was talking" might take it, although "When my depression works the graveyard shift, all of the people I've ghosted stand there in the room" is a close runner-up.

TTPD: This one I think is impossible to nail down lol. I'm going to ultimately say "I dreamed about it in the dark the night I felt like I might die." Because I think that's probably the most all-encompassing of the album as a whole and the experiences she had. But "She thought about how he said since she was so wise beyond her years everything had been above board, she wasn't sure" I think almost tops it because I think it recontextualizes not just the events of TTPD but sooooooo much of her discography in a way that feels like a watershed moment in her understanding of herself. Also "Don't want money, just someone who wants my company" because it also explains a lot.

This was awesome anon! Thank you!

[youngsadlesbian]

BABY'S FIRST GAY PANIC (PART 2) — carina deluca and maya bishop.

pairing: carina deluca x maya bishop x daughter!reader

summary: you start enjoying going to the hospital again and it doesn't take long for your mothers to find out why.

a/n: @sad-x3 asked me for a part 2 of this and here it is. i don't know if i followed the path she wanted, but that's okay. hope you like it! english is not my first language so i’m sorry for any mistakes, guys.

word count: 1,3k

warnings: kinda angst but then fluff in the end, maya being stupid and the most doting mother in the world <3

You loved spending time with your Aunt Amelia at the hospital because she always found a way to let you watch some surgery she was doing, because you were her favorite niece and she did everything you asked.

But there were no surgeries today. Amelia was in the emergency room treating several patients who appeared to be suffering from the same severe headache. Bored and also having a bad headache from the flu, you sat on the floor of the infirmary while putting on your headphones to listen to Taylor Swift. You didn't notice the presence of a teenage girl behind you until she was tapped on the shoulder.

"Do you like Taylor Swift?" That was Nurse Hernandez's daughter who was at the hospital every day after she got out of school. You had seen her there several times during your life.

"Yes, I'm listening to Evermore." You walked away so the girl sat next to you. "What can we say that..."

"He's Folklore's brother." She smiled. And what a smile. "My name is Elena. You are the daughter of Doctor DeLuca and Captain Bishop, right?"

"Yes, but most people just call me Y/n." Elena rolled her eyes. "Want to listen to the album with me?"

"Of course."

You spent hours on end listening to all of Taylor Swift's albums, and when your phone died, you simply talked about anything that came to mind. You discovered that Elena was a really nice girl and you had a similar vibe, which made you automatically enjoy her company. When your aunt looked for you hours later, she caught you laughing like there was no tomorrow with Elena and was almost sorry to end the moment between you.

"Y/n/n, your mom is already going home." You waved goodbye to Elena and went after your mother with Amelia.

It didn't go unnoticed by Carina that you seemed happier and more excited since the morning, she made a mental note to mention this to her wife later. Normally you talked a lot in the car, but this time you were so busy with your phone that it blinked every second with a new notification that she preferred not to interrupt.

At some point you got over your crush on Julie because it was replaced by a huge crush on Elena. You two had become great friends, talking practically all day through messages about anything. It was with you that Elena shared that she had finally had her first kiss.

You fell asleep right after taking your medicine, which really made you sleepy, but not before practically begging your mother to take you to the hospital again.

Teenagers really were very weird.

You were very grumpy after this information, but she made some joke and changed the subject when she noticed your discomfort.

Every possible opportunity to stay at home you used to go to the hospital. At this point, your mother Carina already knew about Elena's existence and thought your friendship with the girl was cute.

Maya hated it. She felt that there was something more between you two and to her you were still a baby. And of course, she was right.

You didn't have a completely platonic relationship. At least not since you decided to admit that you liked her more than just a friend and she confessed that she felt something more too. You never kissed or anything like that out of pure insecurity, but that was about to change.

Heavy rain in Seattle caused part of your school's roof to collapse, leaving all students home for three days until the repairs were finally completed.

Your mother was having surgery that would take a few hours, so you decided to take shelter with Elena in her office. You don't remember exactly what turn your conversation took and made you and Elena start kissing. Much less did you remember when your mothers entered the office and caught you in a compromising position.

"I told you, Carina!" Your mother Maya screamed. You distanced yourself as much as possible from Elena, wiping your face stained by her red lipstick. "There was no way this was platonic."

"Bella, we'll deal with this later. Elena, your mother is looking for you to go home." You ran to Elena and shook her hand before she finally left. That only seemed to increase Maya's anger, scaring you so that you cowered even more on the floor.

Carina approached you and touched your head.

"Bambina, look at me."

"Mamma Maya è arrabbiata con me." You had a habit of speaking Italian when you were nervous. Maya felt her heart tighten with regret for once again letting her anger get the best of her.

"Let me deal with Mamma Maya, ok bambina?" You shook your head and looked at your mother. Your eyes were teary and there were still traces of lipstick on your face. "There's the most beautiful girl in the world. Is Elena your girlfriend?"

"No, mamma. But I really wanted this."

"You're not old enough to date, Y/n DeLuca-Bishop!" Maya shouted. "You need to focus on your studies and nothing else."

"Bella, leave me alone with her." Carina gave her best I think you'd better obey me look when Maya resisted her request. The firefighter left the office in a huff. "Don't listen to what your mother said. If you're happy, I'm happy. Now let's go home."

You didn't talk to any of your mothers the whole way, even though Carina tried to start a conversation. Maya was so angry and you were so afraid that she would freak out and send you to the other side of the world just to get away from Elena that it hurt deeply.

Dinner was also eaten in silence and with you trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. Carina wanted to hit Maya hard when she noticed this.

You retired early saying you needed to finish some homework. Only then did Carina let all her frustration out.

"Your daughter needs your support, you idiot!" Carina frantically hit Maya on the shoulder, who tried to free herself from her wife without success. "Sei incredibile, Maya Bishop!"

"I know I overreacted..."

"Overreacted? You were terrible. I think you better fix this before it gets worse."

That's what Maya did. Before knocking on your bedroom door she heard you sniffle and felt like the worst mother in the world.

Maya took a deep breath and knocked twice on your door.

"Y/n/n, it's mom." Maya heard the sound of some things falling before you finally responded.

"Go away."

Then you cried. You cried because you felt like you let your mother down and you felt like she didn't love you anymore and mainly because you were afraid of her forcing you to stay away from Elena.

"I'm sorry, honey. I was too extreme. I'm still learning, you know?" You opened the door a crack and she saw one of your brown eyes staring deeply at her. "I'm still learning how to be a good mother and sometimes I feel like I'm not."

"You are, mom. You're good at so many things but you're the best as being my mom. I was just scared that I let you down."

"You would never be capable of that, little bee. Even if you committed a crime I still think it would be impossible to disappoint me." You opened the door and your mother saw how wrecked you were. Hair standing on end and face swollen from crying. "Come here and hug mommy, please?"

You hugged her and then everything was fine. Because Maya really was bad at a lot of things and hard-headed about pretty much everything, but she was the best mother you could ask for.

[kasagia]

Bring me a dream pt. 1

Pairing: Aleksander Morozova/general Kirigan x fem! sun summoner! reader Summary: Everyone has their soulmate—someone they are meant for. This was due to Sankta Maradaia, who decided to connect two souls destined for each other during their sleep to show them their other half, Sankta also sent them a tattoo of their loved one name, so that souls thirsting for each other can finally be united. Aleksander never had even one, short dream about his soulmate. Just a tattoo that has taunted him for ages. The Darkling believes this is his punishment for creating the fold, another privilege of being condemned. To never know his soulmate. But one day, a dream about a sun summoner comes to him. Someone equal to him. Someone meant for him. And he promises himself to find you at all costs. Not just because of your powers. Nonsense from me: This is an request from @morrigan-crowmwell I hope you like it! 💙🖤 P.S. I know it took me soooo looong again and I'm so sorry. I'm trying to fight my writer's block. 😅 I used a quote from Taylor Swift's Blank Space. Inspired by the song Mr. Sandman - SYML Wairning(s): mentions of blood, abuse, fighting, violence Word count: 6,7k Taglist: @aoi-targaryen @morrigan-crowmwell ~•♤♤♤•~ Aleksander Morozova's Masterlist ~•♤♤♤•~

I've been waiting a long time to meet you in my dreams…

"My soulmate is great! I've seen her fight with a REAL sword! Can you imagine that, guys?! My father still teaches me on that wooden. Ugh! I envy her so much."

"Mine swims faster than either of you! Of course, he's not as good as me, but I've seen him shoot a bow. What I'd give to join him on a hunt!"

"And you, sahdow-boy? You sit more quietly than usual, don't be shy! Show off what she or he is like."

Aleksander tensed up, feeling the other boys' eyes on him. The young shadow summoner felt a blush of shame appear on his face. He hated such conversations. He already couldn't fit in with a group of other kids, and he was constantly reminded that he was different. Weirdo. Proteus.

"I… I haven't dreamed of her yet. But I know her name!" he tried to reply in a tone of voice that mimicked their enthusiasm. He couldn't show them that he was weak. That the fact that he had never seen his soulmate before hurt him. That he was a changeling again.

"My father also started dreaming about my mother late. Maybe she just wasn't born yet?" his only friend put a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort him. He thanked the saints for Ivan. He was a light in his darkness for now. And heartrender wasn't talking about his shadows at all...

"Did you hear, guys?! Shadow-boy will be dating a baby!"

Aleksander was furious. He felt anger rise up in him as the other children laughed at his soulmate. Without knowing when, he summoned his shadows and plunged the clearing into darkness, stopping the laughter of the other children.

"Hey, take it easy, shadow-weirdo! We're just kidding!"

"The freak, as usual, can't control himself."

Voices came out of the darkness, and the footsteps of children receding were all Aleksander could hear before he was alone with his shadows again.

Even Ivan's hand disappeared from his shoulder as shadows blanketed the area.

He was utterly alone. And he hated it.

You looked at yourself in the mirror, smiling.

18 birthday. Your big day.

You adjusted the necklace your grandmother had given you around your neck, proudly displaying the amulet with your birthstone. Your mother's earrings hang proudly from your ears. Nostalgia is starting to get to you. You so wish she were here.

"I've lived in this world for so long that, for ages, I've felt that time moves infuriatingly slowly. But ever since you came into the world, I've felt it slip through my fingers. You've grown up so fast... you look like your mother." the woman sighs as she stands behind you in the mirror and looks at you tenderly, fixing your braid.

"I wish a madraya was here." you say sad. Grandma puts a hand on your shoulder and turns you around to look her in the eye.

"She is here, my sun. In our hearts and memories. As long as you can picture her before your eyes, she will always be with you. Watching you from heaven." you both stand in silence, remembering your recently deceased mother.

"I have something for you." the woman speaks as she pulls a beautiful gold bracelet engraved with your family symbol from her sleeve.

"Oh, grandma, you didn't have to… it's beautiful."

"And practical. Materialnik made it specially for me. Thanks to this, no one will see THAT on your wrist."

"Why should I hide it?" you ask, confused, when she helps you fasten the bracelet on your wrist where was your soulmate's name on it.

"I want you to be careful."

"Careful of what?"

"Powerful men." she replies seriously, stroking your cheek tenderly. "There is nothing worse in the world than the greed of men. Than their excessive ambition. We are the sun summoners, honey. You are my blood, my pride, and my only solace in this world. The love of men is fatal. You don't need it, and trust me, you don't want it. Promise me for your dead mother and my daughter..." your grandmother grabbed your wrist, turning it so you both could see that the black ink, that showed up this morning, disappeared. Aleksander Morozova. "Do not seek him. Avoid him. Treat him like the plague. Do not repeat the fate of your poor mother. I couldn't stand losing you because of another man's lust for power."

"I promise you, babushka. I will not share my mother's fate." you promise with tears in your eyes. Your mother trusted the wrong person... you were not going to repeat her fate.

"And you will always wear a bracelet and necklace from me?"

"Yes. I promise." you solemnly promise, while looking into her eyes. You two were one of a kind. Summoners of the sun. Long-lived. Powerful. You have to stick together if you want to survive in this cruel for Grishas world. "Can I go now and enjoy the summer solstice festival?"

"Yes. Have fun, sunshine. And return home no more than two hours after dark!" she screams after you as you run to get some freedom... to forget who you are for a while.

"That boy keeps staring at you!" your friend shouts through the crowd of people having fun and nods her head at the boy by the fire.

You glanced at the side she indicated. She is right. A handsome brunette with dark eyes looks straight at you. He looks away when he sees you noticing him and pretends to be talking to the boy next to him. You roll your eyes at your friend's behaviour and continue drinking your beer.

"And what do you think I'm supposed to do about it?"

"Go and have fun!" she says, offended that you don't know. "I've known you since you came here. You haven't had a single boyfriend, you're shooing all the suitors away. You're 18. Go and flirt with him, or I'll take care of this handsome one."

You are laughing at her words. You look at the boy again, and you can't deny that you feel a strange pull… a bond that wants you to come to him. But you don't listen to it.

"So take him. I'm going home," you say as night falls completely. The flame of the torch and bonfire is the only source of light.

"Really? Will you waste an opportunity like this?" you just laugh with a shrug at her words and make your way to the path through the woods leading to your house, pushing your way through the crowd of people.

You leave the clearing where the festival is taking place and enter the forest. You sigh with relief to be alone, away from people's voices. You walk confidently into the darkness without being afraid of it as you watch the stars above you.

You are walking down a familiar path when suddenly you hear the crunch of leaves and branches behind you. You turn slowly with your hand close to the hidden dagger at your hip.

You see in front of you the same boy who was staring at you by the fire. You watch him warily, waiting for his move.

He takes one slow step towards you, his dark eyes never leaving yours. Without knowing why, you stare spellbound into his eyes again, unable to utter a word. It's only when he crosses halfway between you that common sense returns to you and you raise a dagger in his direction.

"Don't worry. I won't hurt you." he says, stopping and staring at the blade glistening in the moonlight. "Of course, only if you don't hurt me either."

"Why are you following me?" you ask without lowering your weapon, still holding it as a warning between you two.

He frowns, looking from the dagger to you. "I have no bad intentions. I saw you going this way and this forest… is not the safest place."

"I know. Nowhere is safe." you reply coldly, eyeing him carefully. "Which doesn't answer my question. Why did you follow me in here?"

"I wanted to make sure you made it through safely." you snort, amused, not for a moment believing the stranger's concern for you. He stays where he is, not moving for a moment, undaunted by your reaction. If anything, curiosity only grows in his eyes. "You haven't experienced much kindness from others, have you?"

"I'm not going to answer a stranger's question like that. You do not know anything about me."

"I can see you're too distrustful, and if the lack of trembling in your dagger hand tells me something, it is that you've threatened someone more than once."

"That's right… shouldn't you run as far away from me as possible, then?" you ask, raising an eyebrow at him as you watch his impassive reaction…but you certainly didn't expect him to raise the corners of his… pretty mouth in response.

"I'd rather walk you out and make sure you're okay... or anyone who dares stand in your way." you bite your lip, holding back a smile so you don't react to his teasing.

"I doubt you'd be able to do anything."

"I'm tougher than you think." he says, answering your challenge with a mischievous smirk. The sparkles in his dark eyes shine in the moonlight… and you involuntarily agree with your friend. He was handsome… and dangerous.

"I don't need a man to play my prince on a white horse. I can be my own knight."

"Well, if you want my opinion…" you cut him off before he could finish.

"No, thank you. I have my own." he laughs at your words, shaking his head in amusement as he licks his lips.

He stares at you intensely, and you know that if you were anyone else, you would have pounced on him by the campfire. But you were a sun summoner. You couldn't trust someone like that. Even if you wanted to...

"Very well then... but, I'd feel better walking you through the woods at least. May I?" he asks, extending his hand towards you. "Or are you too afraid that you will enjoy my company?"

You snort, placing your hand in the crook of his arm. You could have let him. Clearly, he has had no ill intentions so far. You glare at him defiantly as you see a spark of amusement in his eyes and a wild smile on his lips.

"What?" you ask dryly.

"Nothing. I just thought you couldn't look prettier… you seem to glow even more when you prove people wrong."

"I'm too smart to be seduced by you." you warn him, looking at him carefully as he tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear. You feel your cheeks blush slightly.

"Maybe that's why I'm so drawn to you?" he asks, whispering, staring into your eyes.

You're drowning in the moment. His smell, the depth of his dark eyes… and without knowing why, the feeling is… actually the opposite of what you felt when others tried to flirt with you.

"Careful... you've stared into my eyes for too long to say you don't care." he says, sparks of malice appearing in his eyes. You snort and are about to respond to his taunt when his expression suddenly cools and he pulls you into his chest.

You're about to yell at him and attack him when suddenly an arrow flies right over where you used to stand. You recognise its distinctive arrowhead. "Drüskelle." you whisper.

You don't waste time. You back away from him and grab your daggers. You can't show the world what power you wield, so you limit yourself to melee combat. You're also not sure if your companion is Grisha.

You kill the first of them, and next to you, you hear the sounds of your companion's fight. He's doing fine. You deal with most of the Drüskelle pretty quickly when suddenly one of them comes up behind you. Before you can engage, your companion pulls you back to his chest. You see nothing. He makes sure of it when you hear Drüskelle's desperate cry from behind you, who wanted to kill you as well as the others who managed to stay alive. Suddenly it's quiet again... but it's darker around you than before.

You gently pull away from him as he releases his strong grip on your hair. You look around, seeing Drüskelle's bodies as if they were… cut.

"I… how?" you ask, dumbfounded, not believing what you see. You turn your gaze back to him. "Are you a Grisha? Heartrender maybe?"

"It's... a little more complicated." he says, looking down at your hands and bloody daggers.

"I'm guessing you're not a Grisha, then?"

"It's a little more complicated." you say, repeating his words. He looks up and stares into your eyes again. Without knowing why, you both giggle. "I... thank you. I wouldn't handle them all alone."

"No problem." He says, still staring at you. Without knowing why, you lean towards him.

You swallow, smelling his scent again, involuntarily remembering the warmth and safety his arms gave you. You shouldn't feel that way about a stranger. And yet...

"I… I should probably go now."

"Me too." he whispers back, but you're both too hypnotised to move. Not thinking much about the bodies around you or the blood on your clothes.

For some strange reason, the eyes of the other and this closeness seem much more interesting to you both than the world around you.

He leans towards you too. A short distance separates you as you both stare at each other in silent anticipation and excitement. However, that moment is effectively cut short as you hear another movement around you.

You both draw your daggers and aim at where you heard the movement. There is a woman behind you. Her dark eyes are remarkably similar to those of your companion. You are surprised to see how his irises have already been etched into your memory.

"You find yourself a friend?" the woman asks him mockingly, staring at the two of you.

"I'm going, mother." he says, obviously waiting for her to leave. But she stands there, watching you curiously. He sighs in annoyance and turns to you. "See you soon." he whispers, placing his dagger in your hand.

You shiver at the skin of his hand on yours as unimaginable power rushes through you. But that's not what keeps you staring at him speechless… and you think you both know it as he gives you a wistful, longing look before turning away.

You can only stay there and stare at the receding silhouettes of the two of them. Then you are all alone again. You turn around and continue on your way home. With a small smile, you tighten your hand around the black dagger.

You were coming home to your grandmother. It was winter, and it was getting harder and harder to drive through the snow from town to your house. But someone had to do the shopping.

As you walked, you heard the sounds of a struggle. Interested, you veered off the path to the house and walked slowly through the snow, trying not to alert anyone to your presence.

You froze as you saw a group of teenagers fighting the same boy who gave you the dagger and helped kill Drüskelle.

The rational part of you told you to get out of there and not deal with this stranger. And you almost did, but then you saw one of the girls stab him in the back and shove him into the ice hole.

You threw the wicker basket with your groceries in the snow and ran towards them. You used your light and stunned them all into unconsciousness. Not enough to kill them, but enough to make their heads hurt for days and some of them lose their eyesight.

With your light, you melted the ice in the river and pulled the mysterious boy out of it by his shoulders.

You held him close as he coughed, spitting water into the snow. You only let him go when he's back to normal.

"Do you attract trouble, or do you just like getting into it?" you ask him with a laugh, trying to lighten the atmosphere. You take off his soaked coat and cover him with one of yours.

"Both, I'm guessing." he says, still shivering. You don't know if it's from the cold or from the attack.

"Get up. We need to keep you warm." you speak and help him stand on two legs.

If he notices the bodies of his unconscious tormentors, he decides not to say anything or ask how you did it. You pick up the basket you dropped earlier and guide both of you to your house.

Surprisingly, he doesn't protest when you enter the house, and luckily for you, your grandmother hasn't come back yet.

"Stay here for a while. I'll go get some dry clothes for you." I speak as I disappear into the other room for a moment.

"How did you overpower them?" you hear his question. You swallow and try to think of an answer as you walk back to the main room.

"It's... complicated." you reply, handing him the clothes. "You can go there and change. I'll put some water on for tea."

He nods and takes the clothes from you. He wants to say something, but instead he sighs and goes to the next room.

You place the kettle over the hearth and wait for the water to boil for tea for the two of you.

"Do you often save people from trouble?" he asks jokingly as he joins you. You smile when you see that he's feeling a little better. He still has a red nose, though. And you're pretty sure if you took his hand, he'd be icy.

"Selected only. Feel honoured." you snort, amused. His laugh makes you shiver. A strange warmth begins to spread from your chest.

"I am." he replies, looking deep into your eyes. He leans closer to you, examining you intently, searching for any reaction from me that would indicate that you are uncomfortable with him.

He finds nothing.

So he leans in a little more. Your noses brush against each other as he waits, giving you the option to either kiss him or pull away from him.

You feel your heart beating fast... you know that if he was a heartrender he would have leaned forward and kissed you a long time ago. You also know you should back off, he was a stranger, a man, you shouldn't trust him.

But after the look he gives you and a glance at his enticing pink lips, you lean forward and press your lips uncertainly to his.

His cold lips warmed up.

You close your eyes as he wraps his arms around you and pulls you closer with one hand on your waist and the other in your hair. You sigh, feeling how wonderful it feels, how proper it is to kiss him even though you don't even know his name. What's undeniable, however, is how great you feel around him.

But you feel something else… like an unimaginable amount of power flows into you with his touch. How your light calls for release. And for a moment, you feel like you're going to lose control if you keep kissing him.

Fortunately, before you stupidly reveal your powers, you pull away from each other, startled by the sound of a whistling kettle.

You both laugh, resting your foreheads against each other. You eventually pull away from him, take the kettle off the hearth, and shift your gaze to it. He's warmer from your kiss than from the fire.

You shift your gaze towards him. And experimentally, you take his hands in yours. You feel the surge of power buzzing through your veins again. Your gaze returns from his warming hands in yours to his irises, and you get lost in his dark eyes again.

"You... are the amplifier." you whisper as you look at him. "That's why they wanted to kill you... they wanted your bones."

He swallows, moves his gaze from your eyes to your joined hands. He doesn't take them out of your warm embrace as he nods, trembling without looking at your face.

"What are you going to do about it?" he asks, realizing full well that you must be Grisha to sense his ability.

The very idea that you, the only person who has shown him any kindness (not knowing him at all) will suddenly want to hurt him after what happened between you two a moment ago makes him sick.

But Aleksander has been through it more than once. Last an hour ago. Despite everything, he still holds a strong grip on your hands, trembling unconsciously.

Your response is to pull him close to you in a tender embrace.

"You're safe." you say simply, and from the way he holds his breath before burying his head in your neck after a few seconds of complete shock, you know that you must be the first person in a very long time to show him such affection.

And you're realizing that you don't need to know his name to know that it's good to hold him in your arms.

And Aleksander feels warm for the first time in a long time. He feels like he's holding the sun. But the most striking thought for him is that he is no longer alone...

"Is that all, General?" Ivan's question pulled Aleksander out of his thoughts. He stopped stroking the tattoo with his soulmate's name hidden under his kefta and glanced at the heartrender.

"Yes, you can go." he sighs, shifting in his chair and rubbing his eyes with his hand.

Ivan looks like he wants to say something but changes his mind at the last moment and leaves the war room, closing the door softly behind him.

Aleksander sighed, staring at the map in front of him. The king was going to bring down Ravka. Only his Grishas were able to hold Ravka's borders. He shuddered, thinking of all the good soldiers the Fjerdans, Drüskelle and others had taken from him. He felt powerless. And if he knew anything in his centuries-old life, it was that he hated that feeling.

He ran a hand through his hair, glancing at his watch on the wall. It was long after midnight. He sighed as he got up from his chair and walked towards his bedroom. He won't help his army if he's barely conscious. He took off his kefta and pushed the books to one side of the bed. He lay down in the free space and fell asleep as soon as his head rested on the pillow.

Something was different… otherwise, Aleksander could sense it the moment his dream began.

There was a strange feeling in his bones; his heart was beating much faster, excited, as if it couldn't wait for what was about to happen.

He was alone again in the deep black shadows. He took a step, and suddenly the shadows parted. He looked up and gasped as he saw a figure in a black-golden kefta in the distance.

He'd had that dream many times before… especially when he was a little boy. That he was irretrievably lost in the darkness.

He had never met anyone in the depths of his shadows before. He took another hesitant step towards the mysterious figure, not taking his eyes off it, afraid that it would disappear at any moment.

But it's not.

A figure in a gold-black kefta stood with its back to him.

Aleksander is afraid. He's afraid that it's just another trick of his mind, that as soon as he utters the name that has haunted him both asleep and awake for hundreds of years, you'll disappear, leaving him utterly alone in the darkness of his shadows again.

But Aleksander had been patient enough for a long time... maybe he could finally give in to what he most wanted, what he missed most, what he craved for like a foolish boy.

He came over to you. Hesitantly and slowly. As if he could spook you at any moment. He raised his hand, but instead of touching your arm, he met air as you took a step away from him and slowly turned to face him.

He held his breath in anticipation, waiting for you to pull down your gold-black hood to reveal your face to him. He watched in fascination as golden threads of light slowly began to flow from your hands.

He had been accustomed to the darkness for centuries. But he couldn't take his eyes off you as your threads of light slowly grew stronger. He watched in utter awe as your light changed from gold to pure white after dispelling the shadows around you two.

His eyes widened as your hood fell back to reveal your familiar, beautiful face. He sighed, letting out a long-held, shaky breath.

And when you took his hand, which he still held out to you, and ran your thumb over his palm? He completely lost himself in your irises, feeling your light grow stronger through its amplifying powers, enclosing the two of you in a silver and gold orb.

But before he gets a chance to reach out to you and caress your cheek tenderly, to feel again that warmth he always felt from you and which turned out to be your light, you suddenly disappear. And with you, your warm light.

His cold shadows enveloped him again…

He wakes up and finds himself in his bed, in his chambers. But for the first time in a long time, instead of being disappointed that he didn't dream of his soul mate this time, he's relieved. And happiness. Excitement. And something he's clung to so desperately all these centuries, much to his mother's taunt... he feels hope.

He doesn't know what has changed. Why suddenly did the saints decide to reveal your face to him after you had met so many centuries ago? For a moment, the bitter thought crosses his mind that he could have had you by his side much sooner. That together you could carry the weight of eternity... but he shakes his head.

He had a chance to implement all his plans now... and to meet his soulmate, whom he had missed for so many centuries. All he had to do was track you down.

And he's not going to lose.

"I'll find you... moya solnishko." he whispers to himself, fondly stroking the tattoo on his wrist. "And when I do, I'll make sure you'll never hide from me again." he promises, placing his lips on the tattoo on his wrist.

He would do anything to finally have someone to call his own…

"I was hoping to find you here." Aleksander turns around in surprise when he sees you standing behind him.

"How did you know?" he asks, putting the book back on the shelf. You see the title out of the corner of your eye.

The Lives of Saints

"I know many things." you say, leaning against the shelf. "But honestly? I didn't take you for someone who prays to saints. Or maybe your ego and ambition are so big that you want to become one of them?" you say teasingly, smirking at him. He rolls his eyes and takes your hand, leading you out of the library. You let him lead the two of you into the woods.

"You must have wanted something if you took your precious time to find me." he starts when you both walk a familiar path. This is where your strange "friendship" began, if you could call those stolen moments, kisses, and nights between you two like that… how poetic that it will end here as well.

"I am leaving." you speak briefly without looking at him.

You feel him tense up. It was probably not the answer he ever expected. Out of the corner of your eye, you see him swallow.

He clears his throat, trying to look composed. However, his dark eyes, as always, reveal his true feelings to you. You wonder if you're the only one who can read him like that. "Why?" he whispers.

"Apparently my warning was… not strong enough. One of the people who tried to kill you complained to my grandmother. I have to leave."

"I can talk to her…"

"No!" you cut him off quickly, letting go of his hand and standing in front of him. The last thing you need is his intercession with your grandmother. "I know you mean well, but it's the final decision."

"I see." he says coldly, looking away from you. "Is there anything else you wanted?"

"Yes." you say, pulling his dagger out of your sleeve, handing it to him. "I wanted to give it back to you."

"It's a gift. I'm not in the habit of taking back what I've given someone." he snorts, offended, at which you giggle, amused. He turns his gaze back to you, raising an eyebrow.

"I knew you'd say something like that. That's why…" you pull out a second, identical dagger to the one he gave you. The only difference is that the dagger's handle is decorated with a sun… an eclipsed sun. "I did it." you say, handing it to him.

He takes the dagger from you and examines the engraving. "Why it?" he asks curiously. "Why the eclipsed sun?" his gaze is burning, inquisitive. You know there's no turning back now. You take a step back, his dark irises following your every move.

You shrug. "Guess, shadow summoner."

He stares at you in shock. A thought… a ridiculous and beautiful thought crosses his mind. He knows there's no point in chasing after you. You'll run away from him anyway. But he can't help but scream after your receding silhouette. "What's your name?!"

You're smiling. But you don't turn around to look at him one last time, to steal one last look at his dark, piercing eyes, to get one more moment... Instead, you scream over your shoulder: "Call me sunshine!"

You disappear from his sight. Deep down, you know you'll meet again… But you weren't going to share your mother's fate… even for such mesmerising, dark eyes as his.

After hundreds of years, you've become accustomed to dreamless sleep.

It was your conscious choice. A promise to grandma, mother, and you. You didn't pray to the saints to bring you a dream about your soulmate. You didn't want him... even though his name on your wrist, hidden by your grandmother's bracelet, had tormented you for hundreds of years.

That's why, when your first dream started, you knew it was something bad. You knew your grandmother's necklace had somehow fallen off your neck. And so, you were dreaming. You dreamed about him... and he probably dreamed about you.

You galloped on a horse. It was early morning. The clearing where you galloped was shrouded in mist. The cool wind hit your skin, and your cloak billowed behind you as you tried to lose the black rider following you.

People usually run to their soulmates. They wanted to meet them at all costs. Not you. But the saints have never been merciful to you… maybe because you never prayed to any of them.

Or have they stopped letting you prolong the inevitable.

That's why the black rider soon caught up with you. He rode by your side for a moment, then shot forward. You knew he was trying to block your way, so you sped up and managed to catch up with him for a moment. You rode side by side for a while, but you didn't dare look and atface.

But your wishes no longer mattered.

He sped up ahead of you and stepped sideways, causing your horse to stop and stand on two legs. You held on tight to keep from falling. It wasn't until your horse had calmed down and stood on all four hooves that you loosened your grip on the reins.

"Moya solnishka..." his whisper made you shiver. You lifted your head and looked into those familiar, damned dark eyes that were the cause of all your troubles.

You sat still as he rode his horse closer to yours so he could touch your cheek with his hand. His thumb caressed your skin gently. "I've been waiting a long time for you."

You shivered, hypnotised, as you watched him lean closer to you. A familiar warmth spread through your body as you felt him amplify your powers. But his lips were too close for you to notice anything else than him; his touch and dark eyes, which were looking only at you...

You wake up suddenly. Your hand goes to your neck. Panicked, you discover that your grandmother's necklace is not there… you must have lost it in a fold.

"Fuck." you whisper, running your hand through your hair. The only defence against dreaming about your soul mate is gone. And now he knew who you really were... just as your fears were confirmed.

He was your soulmate. General Kirigan, Darkling, Black Heretic, the boy who was your first kiss hundreds of years ago…

The monster who created the fold…

And as it turned out… Aleksander Morozova.

You look around the room, realizing you're in a tent. And the red keftats of bustling healers confirm your worst fears.

During your journey through the fold, the ship was attacked by volcra. And you, obviously not wanting to die or let other people die, decided to use your power. You've done it hundreds of times before. Only much more discreetly… and you've never fainted from using so much of your power.

Your grandmother must be cursing you from the grave. She warned you a thousand times not to go near Ravka or the fold… and even after her death, you didn't listen to her. Now you have to sneak out of here somehow before word about the sun summoner spreads around the world. Hundreds of years of hiding will be wasted just because you weren't careful enough…

He was excited. He couldn't stand still.

His soulmate, his sun summoner, the solution to all his problems, his little sunshine was here.

He had been waiting for this moment for centuries. He had imagined it thousands of times. However, he never thought that his soulmate would be brought to him by his heartrender after they captured her after rescuing a ship full of people from the fold.

He dismisses everyone from the tent. Only he and she remain.

"It's been a long time, solnishko." he speaks softly. He is prepared for her silence and gives her a moment to process the situation. But he hoped to see a little more enthusiasm from her...

So he takes the time to look at her. On noting all the changes he might notice in her… her cool, indifferent look in those eyes that captivated him so much is one of the worst changes.

He clears his throat. You are still silent. You still ignore him. And Aleksander can't stand it.

"I had an interesting dream recently…" he begins, but you don't pick up on it. You don't really take your eyes off the floor… he's starting to get annoyed.

"You won't look at me?" he asks, waiting for your reaction. However, he finds nothing. Just a blank stare at the symbol he has chosen over the course of several hundred years. Eclipsed sun.

"You won't even comment on that? What a pity. I've always liked your sharp tongue." he says, taking a step towards you. You watched him carefully. He's a little triumphant to see that he's managed to catch your eye. Saints… he missed those damn eyes. "The cat stole your tongue? Or did they finally cut your tongue out for your insolence?"

"I thought you liked my sharp tongue." you snort sarcastically, avoiding his gaze as you realize he won't come any closer.

"She can talk!" he says, clapping his hands. "I was afraid something had happened to you, sunshine." you flinch at his words.

"Don't call me like that." you growl angrily, turning your stern gaze on him.

"You told me to call you that yourself. Don't you remember?"

"And now I take away your right to do so, Black Heretic. Or maybe you prefer a Starless Saint? I think I remember that you wanted to become one; what a pity people didn't even try to remember your name." you taunt him, and for a moment you see that he is offended, even hurt by your words, but his eyes quickly become blank, unmoved by your words.

As if he had heard them hundreds of times before and gotten used to them…

"I don't remember you being so… hostile to me before. What has changed?" he asks instead, watching you carefully and looking for answers in your eyes. But after all these years, you too know how to hide your emotions behind a stony mask of cold indifference.

"Maybe you didn't know me at all?" the question hangs between you for a while. You see for a moment that he hesitates with his answer, but his indecision is quickly replaced by a mocking, derisive smirk.

"When I heard about the mysterious Grisha, who can summon light and was stupid enough to throw herself into battle against hundreds of volcra, I immediately thought of you. And guess what…"

"At least one of the two of us should be concerned about Grishas' welfare. Why am I not surprised it's me and only me?" you see him clench his fists in rage when you insinuate that he's selfish, that he doesn't care about his people.

"Or maybe you don't know me at all?"

"I know men like you."

"There are no men like me. There are no others like us. And there will never be. I thought you had enough time to accept and understand it." he says bitterly, staring at you, disappointed. "Anyway, I have to go through the formalities. Your sleeve, please."

You stand still, too stubborn and angry to cooperate with him. He snorts, expecting your reaction, and takes two steps over the distance between you. You lift your head slightly, giving him a defiant look. He just gives you that irritating, confident smirk and grabs your hand gently, rolling up your sleeve himself. His dark eyes never leave yours. Even when his ring pierces the skin of your forearm.

You're so intent on each other that there might as well not have been that beam of light between you that shot the moment he made a small cut on your arm. It's just you and him. And from the unreadable smirk on his face, you might as well expect anything.

If you used to do it easily, now you can't read his eyes anymore. A skill he had to acquire over time. Hiding true emotions.

You both have changed. Each in its own way. He was no longer the nameless boy you met. And you weren't the mystery girl he used to know. He became the darkness he so often summoned... and you became the light you were meant to carry. If you once had anything in common, now you are completely strangers. Time heals wounds... or deepens them, but it always and undeniably changes people.

But neither of you could deny the connection between you. Even after all this time and even after what happened. It was a bound that was pulling you both towards each other…

"You and I are going to change the world, Y/N." you shivered hearing your real name for the first time come out of his mouth as lightly as if he had always called you that. Like he's always known you by that name deep in his heart.

Even if you didn't agree with him, you have to admit that he was right...

It's gonna be forver or it's gonna go down in flames...

[thegalaxysedge22]

After Ever (Chapter 1)

masterlist

pair: sylus x MC (named, sorry)

tags: grief, descriptions and depictions of death, swearing, also spoilers for the game lol

word count: 2.5k

summary (full fic): after her grandmother's tragic death, kore promises to avenger her and find out the truth of the aether core inside of her heart. along the way she learns of the mysterious onychinus and their feared leader sylus, a man she hates with every fiber of her being. but something isn't adding up with it all, together kore and sylus uncover secrets of the past and their views of each other are challenged

song rec: marjorie by taylor swift (just to give you an idea of what you're gonna get)

a/n: idk about the title also bc this is a long form thing and only chapter 1 we don't meet sylus yet. also just so we're all clear this is going to be cannon adjacent, with some things being pulled directly from the game i am still going through the chapters but a hyperfixation's gotta hyperfixate.

Caleb and Grandma are gone. They’re dead.

I’ll never get to hear Grandma’s laugh or have Caleb’s food ever again - they’re just gone.

Kore still can’t believe it. Sitting at her desk at the Hunter’s Association unsure how to process it all. The official report of their deaths stared back at her from the screen. A metaflux explosion, one of the many to happen recently. Kore couldn’t take how the report portrayed both her Grandma and Caleb as another statistic, an inevitable tragedy caused by energy fluctuations. Whether it was delusion or a hunch, she could tell something wasn’t right about it, she had no way to prove it but in her heart- Kore just knew that this couldn’t be the whole story. 

The news playing segment playing in the background was rattling on about the series of metaflux explosions and the anchor's voice grating on her last nerves. Anger was brewing inside of her, Kore’s heart was breaking all over again, how could they use Caleb and her Grandmother’s deaths in this way. They didn’t even talk about the way Grandma could light up a room or the crinkles around her eyes when she laughed, or how Caleb loved cooking and would cook for others at every chance he got.

She couldn’t keep listening to this, Kore starts to reach for the remote when a hand swoops down and shuts off the TV. Tara’s concerned face looks back at her.

“What are you doing here Kore,” her work best friend asks, “I thought you were out on a mission again, or maybe you went home.”

“Yeah, I'm gonna clock out soon, I just finished reading these reports. I have to turn them in first,” Kore says and returns her focus onto her computer.

“You’re working so hard. Handling all these missions and investigating the Metaflux incidents.”

“...I refuse to believe what happened to me was just an accident,” Kore says confidently. Although she doesn’t have any definitive proof as of right now, she is confident that something about it all doesn’t quite add up.

Tara vocalizes her concern over her friend’s wellbeing, offering to take her out for food, because it was clear she hasn’t been eating. But before a response could come for Kore, their captain, Jenna, walks in.

“Captain,” Tara says, her schoolgirl crush on the captain would normally make Kore smile, but she just doesn’t have that in her right now. “I’ll send you the reports soon!” Tara finishes enthusiastically.

“Thank you,” Jenna says before looking between the two of them, “I just got one about a protocore analysis. Who sent it?”

“Oh, yes. Sorry about that,” Kore tries to sound normal but her words come out in a monotonous voice. “That was me,” she says, trying to stand up, but nearly topples over when her blood pressure drops and her vision gets blurry. Tara is trying to convince her that she needs to go home and rest when Kore’s phone starts ringing, saving her from the rest of her friend’s lecture.

It had turned out that the call was a reminder about her doctor’s appointment with Zayne, and that is how she had ended up at the Akso Hospital waiting for an emergency surgery to finish so she could talk to him. Is he always this busy? I mean he has always been a bit of an overachiever I suppose, Kore thought to herself as she stared off into the waiting room.

She was so lost in her thought that she didn’t even notice Zayne had approached her, not until he waved his hand in front of her face and snapped her out of her trance.

“Sorry about that,” Kore said sheepishly, “I guess I sort of dazed off while waiting for you.”

“Well I’m here now. Should we go over your results,” Zayne said, making a gesture towards his office. Kore nodded and walked in sitting down at his desk, and he was not far behind.

Zayne, ever the professional, proceeded to go over the report with her. He said basically the same things she had heard throughout her entire life, that the Protocore fragment in her heart is dangerous and she needs to be mindful of it. He spared her the scolding about her intense life choices as a Hunter, having learned long ago that will not deter Kore. In his rambling, Zayne had managed to say something that really captured her attention.

“You are unlike any patient with your type of Protocore Syndrome that I have ever seen, all the evidence says that you should not be as healthy as you are, in fact you likely shouldn’t even be alive. It’s a miracle you are quite frankly, and that you are as in good of shape as you are. A true scientific anomaly,” Zayne said, seemingly more engaged in the conversation than he was going over the reports.

“Well Grandma always told me I was special,” Kore said with a lighthearted chuckle. 

Zayne looked at her, eyes softened and full of concern, “I had been meaning to check in on you, I’ve just been so busy at the hospital recently. So, how are you, Kore?”

“I’m doing about as well as you can expect I suppose,” she responded trying to put a smile on her face, “But it has been really hard.” Kore’s gaze turned down to her hands which were fiddling in her lap.

“I can imagine, and I hope you know that I am here for you, Kore,” Zayne said, catching her gaze, eyes full of empathy. “Now I am reminded that you Grandma gave me something she had wanted to give to you,” he said before pulling out a locked box.

“Do you know what it is?” she questioned, taking the box in her hands and looking it over.

“I do not. Your Grandma gave me explicit instructions to hold onto it and give it to you should anything happen to her,” he said, folding his hands on his desk. Before Kore could form a response a Protofeild appeared in Zanye’s office and a wanderer emerged.

“The hospital’s flux stabilizer must be down, I gotta alert the association. Stay back Zayne.” Kore says, attempting to alert the Hunter’s Association of the threat

“You are in no position to be fighting like this, Kore,” Zayne said while she fidgeted with her watch.  Rolling up his sleeves, Zayne continued, “Your heart is exceptionally vulnerable and it would be neglectful of me as your doctor to let you partake in this alone. We will defeat this Wanderer together.”

Luckily, the fight went fast, Zayne was really effective with his Evol fighting the Wanderers, it almost made Kore question why he even bothered to go into the medical field in the first place.

“Here, let me walk you out, Kore,” Zayne said once the fight was finished.

“Oh, you don’t need to do that, I know where the door is,” Kore said awkwardly, hoping not to take time out of the doctor’s schedule.

“Please, I insist. I am due for a break anyways,” he said, opening the door wide hand gesturing for her to go first. At that point Kore knew nothing was going to change his mind, so he shrugged and walked out of the office.

“Yvonne, did anything happen to the hospital’s flux stabilizer just now?” Zayne asked his receptionist on their way out.

“No,” Yvonne responded confused with a furrowed brow, “Why do you ask, did something happen?”

“Oh no, nothing happened, I thought I heard the alarm go off,” Zayne responded, the lie rolling fluidly off his tongue, which confused Kore as he had always been an honest man. “Anyways, I am off to lunch, do you need anything while I am gone?”

“Oh, no thanks, I just ate,” Yvonne responded. 

Zanye nodded towards her before focusing his attention back on Kore while motioning ahead he asked her, “Shall we go?”

Kore gave him a weak nod, a questioning look on her face as the two fell in step. “What was that about? Shouldn’t we alert someone about what just happened?”

“It seems like it was an anomaly, and there is no need to cause a panic in the hospital over a one off thing,” Zayne said, in his usual scholarly tone, “What is important now, is where would you like to go to eat?”

At night, when Kore returned to her apartment, her mind was in a fog. Grief had been consuming her since the accident, its tendrils had dug deep inside her mind, trapping her there. Everything had been so confusing since the accident that her brain hurt.

Dropping her bag off at the door she took off her shoes before plopping herself on the couch. That’s where she saw it. On the coffee table lay Caleb’s necklace. She reached out and grasped it, clutching it tightly to her chest as if it was the only thing tying her to him, and to some extent it was.

The ghosts of memories that were haunting her had returned yet again. She started playing back the time when she had gifted it to Caleb. He had been leaving for school to become a pilot and had promised that he would keep it on him at all times, but the only reason why she had the necklace left in the first place was because he had dropped it. Tears started spilling from her eyes at a steady pace.

It was the only thing she had left of him, no, it was the only thing she had left of them. Of course their bodies weren’t recoverable, the fire had burned so bright that they were no longer distinguishable from the rubble in the mountain of ash that once had been her home. One of the first responders even marveled at the rarity of it all, as a fire has to burn almost unnaturally hot for even bones to turn to cinder. They also remarked on how unevenly the fire had burned, with some parts of her Grandmother’s house having been completely turned to ash and others were still recognizable even in their charred state.

She was inconsolable now, sobs wracked through her small body like an earthquake trembles the earth. She clutched the pendant so tight her knuckles turned white. For how long she stayed in that state, she would never know.

Eventually, something inside of her snapped. Something about the whole thing was wrong, there had to be something that she was missing. Pulling out her laptop she started to search for all that she could find on the recent metaflux explosions. The explosion that killed her family had been the 32nd recent metaflux, up until Grandma and Caleb, there had been no casualties, not even minor injuries. The other explosions were also less catastrophic to the buildings, of course they were badly damaged but they weren’t destroyed like her grandmother’s house was. 

That shouldn’t be right, Kore thought to herself, what was so different about this one, why isn’t it like the other metaflux explosions? With that she started diving into all she could find relating to how metaflux worked. Thankfully, Ever, a multinational group that has been studying metaflux for years (along with a myriad of other things), was an incredible resource as to how metaflux functioned.

The very first signs of daylight started to emerge from the windows of her apartment as she was scouring a scholarly research paper commissioned by Ever. She was struggling to understand exactly what it was saying and growing increasingly more frustrated at the complex scientific jargon.

At her wit’s end she scrolled down to the end of the paper hoping to find something more clear there, luckily she found something even better. Down at the end of the page was the head researcher’s contact information, a Dr. J. Higgins. A surge of relief rushed through her and she quickly started to compose an email to him. Before she could type anything out the computer screen went black. A primal sound of rage erupted through Kore;s throat. 

This can’t be happening, she screamed in her mind. Where the absolute FUCK is my charger, she thought to herself while she practically tore her place apart like a madman. She turned back to the couch about to reside herself to defeat in a wave of frustration, when she spotted the darkened silhouette of her backpack. How could I miss that, I had my laptop with me at work today, idiot, she scolded herself.

She practically stormed to her bag and when she opened it she saw the box that Zanye had given her earlier, the one from her Grandma. It was like time slowed down, Kore pulled it out of the bag like it was the most delicate thing in the world, completely forgetting the charger.

Her footsteps padded over to her small dining table and she sat down. Carefully she placed the box on the table in front of her wondering what could possibly be inside it. Why on earth would Grandma give it to Zayne of all people, no offense Zayne, she thought to herself as her fingers traced the outline of the box. Fear, anxiety, anticipation, and more coursed through Kore as she sat staring at the box unsure what to do about it.

Finally, curiosity got the better of her and she opened the box. Inside were multiple files of papers, one even being marked as classified. She took a beat to look at the sheer amount of documents then opened the first file and started reading.

The more she read the more she slipped into a state of denial. She was the result of an experiment and an aether core had been placed in her heart. What the fuck is an aether core, she thought to herself, she pulled out her phone to look it up. Nothing came up, other than whispers of it being an Ever project on forums that were now ancient, which she easily disregarded. But the worst thing they said was that her grandma had been involved in it somehow, her name being scattered throughout the papers. Not wanting to believe what the documents had said, Kore threw the papers back into the case and slammed the lid. 

By now the sun is up and people are starting to go about their day. Kore did the same and followed her typical morning routine, but she brewed an extra large pot of coffee to compensate for her all-nighter. Somehow she remained in a trance-like state but her thoughts were racing. 

After a large cup of coffee with breakfast, Kore went to change into a new uniform, not wanting people to get the wrong idea if she showed up in a zombie-like state in yesterday’s clothes.

Before she left, she poured herself a thermos with the rest of the coffee to bring to work. She went to the coffee table and grabbed her laptop before reluctantly leaving the security of her apartment.

Next >

[lewsnumerounofan]

party foul part 2 (jeremiah fisher x reader)

summary: so what if you're in love with your best friend jeremiah fisher? one drunk kiss won't change anything. right? (spoiler: it does)

notes: not biblically accurate conrad, kissing, smut, unprotected oops, somewhat public, 3k words, reader previously dated co**ad, angst/miscomm., not proof read at all

+ part 1

+ i fucking hate htis one its so bad i'm so sooryim gooo fuckjuhnbsorry oh my god and dw abt the header image!!!!!! it's okay!!!!!

your phone hit voicemail again. it was the seventh time you’d tried calling jere, but still no luck. 

“maybe he’s staying at a friends place,” belly supplied, but she looked worried too. ever since you and jere had kissed the night before, he’d been mia. steven, you, conrad and belly had all taken turns trying to reach him with no success. at first it had been expected, but it was now rounding out on 24 hours since he’d left, and worry was starting to permeate amongst everyone. well, everyone except taylor. she wasn’t too worried about it. he’s probably just moping around feeling sorry for himself, she’d said. 

unfortunately, you couldn’t quite master taylor’s level of nonchalance. in fact, you felt awful. for a few minutes, everything had been perfect. you’d been kissing the boy of your dreams–the boy you were in love with. and then…

“yeah, he kinda checks out when he’s upset. he did the same thing after mom died.”

conrad, this time. him and nicole had just come back from driving through town trying to find him. you nodded, but a tightness was slinking into your chest. jere hadn’t ‘checked out’ after suzanna died. he’d called you, and together you’d talked for hours as he wandered the streets of boston. never before had he shut you out like this. it made you worried. more than worried; it made you feel scared.

“i think i’ll try him again, just in case,” you said. because you couldn’t not do something. because you were scared you’d messed things up permanently, because jeremiah had never, ever ignored your calls.

“okay, well i’m ordering pizza. jere disappearing or not, i’m fucking starving,” said taylor. she’d hopped off her place on the counter and now started flipping through the take out flyers stuck to the fridge. steven and belly sounded their agreement. 

“i can pick it up,” you offered, “it’ll give me a chance to go look for him too.”

you were out the door soon after, steven and taylor’s argument about whether pineapple belonged on pizza still lingering in the background. feeling a bit better now that you had something to do, you let the warm summer air breeze through your car windows. jere was out there somewhere, probably doing just fine. it’s not like he’d do something dumb or get himself hurt. if you were honest with yourself, he’d most likely just crashed at an old hook up’s house. there were plenty of those around in cousin’s, and they’d likely all enjoy having jere back. you tried not to think about it. 

-

the pizza place was a 20 minute drive from the fischer’s, and you took the long route along the beach. it was a perfect summer night: seagulls called off shore, the sunset lingered to the west, and couples lazily strolling back to their cars. it was the type of night jere loved.

you were a couple minutes early for your order, so you decided to make the most of it and join the sparse crowds decorating the beach. you pulled over and parked, grabbing a light sweater for the evening weather. 

amongst the waves and people’s quiet chatter, the beach possessed a lingering hum. it was a sound that accompanied many of your fondest childhood memories, and you took comfort in it’s familiarity and peacefulness. you couldn’t help but think of jere–think about what had passed between you last night, mostly. 

did you finally tell her you're in love with her? 

you hadn’t been able to get steven’s words out of your head. the thought of jere ever liking you was one thing, but love? it felt too good to be true. 

and besides, it’s not as though it would matter if you never even got to see jeremiah again. for the first time, you almost felt annoyed at his vanishing act. he’d left you confused and frustrated and wanting more.

just then, as if you’d conjured him yourself, you noticed jere on the beach before you. his curls were unmistakable–almost the same colour as the sand. his hands were tan and strong as he leaned back on them, sun-bleached bracelets wrapped around his wrists. you wanted to take a picture of him there. keep this precious moment of discovery and summer immortalised forever.

and then he turned around, blue eyes catching yours. 

you could see the moment worry set in by the tight line that furrowed over his brows. he started to rise from the sand and you moved towards him, carried by adrenaline and anger and a little bit of excitement. halfway down the beach you caught each other, but before you could speak jeremiah was shrugging past you.

“you shouldn’t have come.”

the waves and gulls seem to mock you then–the whole perfect august night laughed in your face as you stopped, stomach sinking. it took a few moments for his words to register, and a few more for you to whip around and catch up to him. he was almost past your car when you finally managed to grasp onto his sleeve. deja vu hit you hard enough that you almost stumbled. just last night this same action led to jere’s lips on yours, his mouth hot over your body. today’s jere must have seen the memory on your face because he scoffed, pulling back sharply.

“see? you can’t even think about what happened without looking disgusted,” he said. his voice was low but convicted. closed. you hated it. 

“jere, what are you talking about? you wouldn’t know anything about how i feel–you ran away last night and no one’s been able to contact you since,” you tried. he made an attempt to keep walking but you didn't let him, this time coming to stand between him and the road. ridiculous.

“no calls, no texts, nothing. do you have any idea how worried everyone has been?”

at this jere’s eyes blazed and he took a step forwards, letting his head lower as he spit the words into your face, “yeah, i’m sure you and conrad were just about worried sick huh.”

it took quite a lot of effort on your part not to roll your eyes. what was with this boy. had the kiss not been enough? did he really think, after all this time, conrad stood a chance?

“you’re such an idiot sometimes jere,” you said, regretting it as his chest shuddered under a heavy breath. 

he laughed and looked away. his eyes were bright in the dwindling sun, his jaw harsh as he fought to control himself. slight smudges under his eyes, extra tangled curls, slightly red eyes. now that you were up close, jere looked a mess. heart hurting you reached for him, wanting to smooth back the stray hair falling over his cheekbones. to smooth over this, over him, to let him know everything was alright. he caught your hand. even this, even his firm grasp on your skin, had your body lighting up. awakening in a way it only would for jere. 

“you sure know how to make it hurt. why can’t you just fuck off and we can pretend this never happened, okay?” he hissed, but you knew jere. the way he blinked more and the way his voice changed. “just- just please go home. it hurts me to look at you right now. it hurts.”

his voice broke and he dropped your hand. you couldn’t stand the look on his face. you didn’t let him turn away from you though. this was your boy, the boy you’d been in love with every day for a year. and you wouldn’t have him thinking otherwise.

your pulse raced as you said, “it’s you, jere. it’s you and it’s always been you. not conrad. and it would hurt me if you thought anything otherwise.”

he flinched at your words but there was something in his face that changed. something small, something that took you having to know how he breathed to notice. hope. 

“jere, look at me. look at me,” you said. and he did, his eyes wide and blue. the same eyes you dreamed of. 

“i love you. i love you, jere.”

you folded the words onto his lips as you kissed him. wrapped them in sugar and pressed them onto his mouth, begging him to understand. to see what had been obvious every night you’d called him, every time you’d hugged him, every time you’d smiled at his dimples.

“i love you.”

and then you couldn’t say anything else because he was cupping your jaw, tilting your face and running his tongue over your teeth. panting as he consumed your gasps. pulled the air from you. 

jere shuffled you back until the cool press of your car met your hips. under him and the way he kissed at your neck, you had no notion of what surrounded you. no idea of anything except the heat of his tongue against your throat. your ear. your lips. 

“up,” he mumbled. that was all the warning he gave before lifting you onto the hood of your car. the metal was cold beneath you but his hands were burning as they circled your thighs, coaxing your legs apart until he could press himself against you. 

he was so big in front of you. the wide span of his shoulders, the strong shape of his hands. he was kissing like he’d hurt if he didn't. you felt feverish, you felt elated. jere broke away enough to rest his forehead on yours, chest rising and catching.

“need you,” he said. his voice was tight.

“what?” 

“said i need you.”

“here?” 

you were incredulous at first, but jere didn't even bother to look embarrassed. his gaze was level with yours and you had to blush and look away.

“we could- i mean, we’ve got my car…”

he grinned as he pulled you down, and the giggle came before you can stop it. around the vehicle and into the back seats you were both trying to stop from laughing. it was such an encapsulation of being a teenager. of sneaking around and driving each other crazy and being in love. the feeling had you collapsing onto his lap as he pulled the door closed, huffing onto the tan skin of his neck.

“this is so stupid,” you said. the grin jere gave leaves you breathless. your fingers pressed over his smile, tracing the red line of his mouth. the car was warm and dark and protected. 

“you have no idea how long i’ve waited for this,” he said, “waited for you.”

you wanted to laugh again but his hands were pulling up your shirt. goosebumps followed the path of his thumb over your bra, under your bra; when he put his mouth on you you moaned. in this little space you’d made the sound was a feeling and jere grinded into you at its touch. focused as he toyed with you, painting your chest red and purple with his lips.

baby, baby, you were saying as strong hands held you close. even as you tried to pull away–push closer?–from the intensity of his kisses. of having his curly hair fall against your chest and stomach. of his eyelashes brushing over your collarbone. you molded your palm to the thick muscle of his shoulder, watching it shake as he took his time drawing you out.

“please, jere.”

he knew what you meant. off comes his shirt, crumpled on the ground beneath the drivers seat. outside the sun had set. gulls still called from offshore, quiet on the other side of the car’s window. 

neither of you bothered getting fully undressed. after struggling with both your pants, he tugged down his boxers enough and helped your trembling fingers pull aside your own underwear. he was whispering you’re sure? even as you raised up on both knees, murmuring in your ear until you had him notched inside you. 

except for your stuttering breaths, it went silent in the car. jere’s hands were at your back, gently gathering your hair into a loose ponytail. he was shaking too then. 

it almost doesn’t seem real–that moment. the press of warm, bare skin. that just days ago you were best friends, and hours ago you weren’t sure you’d have a relationship at all. and now you were here on top of him, having sex in your car at the beach. you wanted to laugh again, but you were seeing white as jere filled you.

you couldn't keep your head up. you were dizzy as you fell forward into his warm chest, taken over by the stretch of him, the perfect fit. he found his breath again, enough to murmur that you were taking him so well. that you felt so good. 

“jere,” you said as his hands found your hips. nodding, kissing the top of your head, he guided you forward and then back, transfixed as he watched where you two fit together. 

it was a tight fit in the car. you had to bend over him so as not to hit your head, and jere’s long legs pressed against the back of the front seat. you don’t care much though, not when you could grind down and watch him tense up, muscles in his neck tight. it should have be criminal to look that pretty. his hair, slightly damp from fucking, curled tighter around his temples. his eyelashes were long over his cheek bones as he tilted his head back, eyes closed. leaning down to lick his adam’s apple you listened to him groan.

“can’t believe ive been missing out on this,” he said. his voice was breathy and quiet and warm on your face and you drew even with him. you wanted to arch into his hands, to bend yourself around him until every piece of your skin was held by his. you felt crazy. 

talking to him like this, when he was still inside you, when you were riding him, made you clench. already you were aching for it. jere knew it too. he was watching you, watching the movement of your body and your face like it was a special act just for him. like you were beautiful.

“jere,” you said. it was just about the only word you can remember.

he shifted beneath you, one hand coming to map the side of your ribs, the other between your legs. the rhythm changed as he began to meet you with his hips, and every breath became hinged on a moan. the way he thumbed over your clit, the way he mouthed at your tits. control was slipping away from you. fast. 

the new angle was almost too much, and as jere buried deep you gasped. your body was liquid and you almost tipped backwards, grabbing at his shoulders. like a man possessed, jere didn’t even pause. his large hand gripped the front headrest above you as he laid you down over the armrest between the front two seats. 

lying prone and naked half in the front of your car, you realized something quite quickly. your back windows were tinted. the front ones most definitely were not. 

“someone could see, jere!” you said, attempting to lift yourself up. most beach-goers had cleared out after the sunset, but faintly you could still hear the sound of people playing in the surf. jere’s tan hand on your chest stopped you.

“we’d better be quick then.”

before you had time to try reasoning, jere was pushing back into you. unable to argue, unable to say anything, you found his hand and laced your fingers together. it was all you could cling to as he fucked into you, as the heat of his body spread over you. it was warm and close and dark and when you finished, together, he stopped breathing. just for a second. then, while your mind was still hazy he pulled you back onto his lap and kissed you. hard. 

holding you there, safe in his arms. at some point he found his sweater and pulled it over your head. warm against his chest, body and legs aching. he whined when you clenched, absently, around him. still pressed inside you. it’s funny so you giggled and he groaned again and threw his arm over his face.

“don’t do that,” he grit out.

“why not?”

you were teasing. his eyes found you, tongue already in cheek. you couldn't look away from his red mouth.

“because i’ll get hard again.”

it amazed you how ready you were at the possibility. your spine already straightening. you don’t think you’ll ever stop wanting him.

but, faintly, you heard your phone ring. it was beneath a pile of clothes and it was on the last ring when you finally managed to snag it. 

“hello?” you said. jere watched you lazily, still smiling. 

“hey, uh where are you?”

you pulled the phone from your ear. the caller id read conrad. shit. pizzas. you’d gotten a bit… distracted. jere caught the name too and though his expression faded slightly, his gaze remained on yours. you smiled at him and couldn't help but kiss him. quickly. 

“yeah sorry about that conrad. listen, bad news is the pizza might be a bit cold,” you could hear groans from the other end of the line, “but uh. good news is i’ve found jere.”

you didn't bother to listen to the response, instead you leaned up to the boy you loved. kissed over his cheek and his dumb grin.

“i found my jere.”

[spoilmesweetieforficssake]

Eating Out Of The Palm Of Her Hand

So I'm pretty sure this little idea came about as a result of a conversation with @bigolgay (but there's every chance I'm wrong)

Anyway, it's brief, peppered with mild angst and a tiny bit of Gary bashing (only because it fitted the idea and not because I hate him)

~*~

“Shoot.”

Barb looks up at her friend across their shared table with concern.

“I forgot about that tasting night I signed up for, back when, you know,” mumbled the red head.  She had been trying to expand Gary’s culinary knowledge in a way that didn’t solely involve her cooking.  Not that she didn’t enjoy cooking, but she didn’t like it when it was just expected.  Nor when her suggestions for dinner were shot down and he would suggest bad takeaway pizza and beer.  “You fancy it?”

“Sorry girl, but Taylor is in town and we have plans this Friday,” apologises the kindergarten teacher.  She nudges her friend, however, and nods in your direction. 

Melissa raises an eyebrow at her friend who it seems is forever keen to push her in your direction.  Still, she fathoms, it’s not exactly a bad solution.  You’ve been out together a few times outside of school and are always good company.  And just because it’s a couples thing, well, that’s more of an insignificant detail, she reasons.  “Hey, half pint?  What you doing this Friday?”

You look over as you hear the nickname the red head often uses for you, despite the fact you’re only a couple of inches shorter than she is.  “Nothing why?”

“You fancy this?”  She waves her phone at you and you push yourself up out of your chair to take a closer look.

“Tasting delicious things and drinking wine with you, where do I sign up?”

She smirks.  “You don’t need to sign up.  Just turn up.”

*

You make an effort for the evening.  The e-mail made the event look pretty classy and you were being seen out with Melissa, who never looked less than a million bucks in your book, so if you spent a little more time than usual putting on your make up and taming your hair, well, it was only because you didn’t want to show her up.

Despite the fact that you’d dressed up, you weren’t quite prepared for Melissa doing the same.  Yes, you’ve seen her most days for nigh on a year now, but you rarely get to see her like this.  “Fuck…”  It’s not quite the hello you’d intended, but then again, you were pretty sure it was criminal in some states to look that good. 

“What?  Something wrong with it?” asks Melissa, looking down at herself at your greeting. 

“No!  No definitely not!” you quickly reassure her.  “It’s just…” 

She smirks.  “Words, kid.  Come on, you got this.”

Your cheeks flame red.  “I know I see you every day, but I guess I just wasn’t ready for…” you trail off, gesturing vaguely at her. 

Her smirk only grows more devious.  “Don’t look so bad yourself,” she quips before heading inside, giving you a glorious view of the back of the outfit and suddenly making it rather difficult to breathe.

*

It immediately becomes apparent that tonight’s event is a couples event.  The chirpy receptionist that greets you both takes Melissa’s name and checks her off on her list, wishing her and ‘her partner’, who is apparently you, a lovely evening. 

The red head, however, seems not to care and you can do nothing but follow her lead.  As you settle in at your assigned table, you both share polite smiles and easy conversation with the other couples sitting close by.  They also assume that you’re together, and again, Melissa doesn’t correct them. 

You know you could clear up the situation with a few words, but it just feels easier to go with the flow.  Afterall, it doesn’t seem to bother Melissa, so the only real harm is to your own heart.  It’s something you’re learning to live with.  At this point, you can’t quite recall a time when you weren’t in love with the red head. 

As the evening progresses, it’s enough that even you forget for a while.  Her enthusiasm and passion are things you love about her, and when it comes to food, they shine through.  She knows her stuff and engages with the producers and chefs that have put tonight’s menu together.  You, meanwhile, are drinking her in just as much as the wine on offer. 

You know that part of her being so vocal about tonight’s offerings is down to her finding this an easier way to digest the information than reading the leaflets that have been left on your table.  Meanwhile, you take note of the things she’s been particularly keen on, tucking away the associated pamphlets and business cards into your bag to help jog her memory later if she wants to track any of them down. 

Each time there’s a new offering, you prompt Melissa to taste them first.  It’s not that you don’t like trying new things, but you like to have an idea of what you’re letting yourself in for first and you’ve found observing Melissa’s facial expressions to be both a reliable and enjoyable way to do so.  When she comes across something she thinks you’ll like she’s immediately reaching out to feed you the delicious morsels of food, and it’s not until you catch yourself thinking that she has you literally eating out of the palm of her hand that you realise you’re in dangerous territory. 

This is just how Melissa is, you remind yourself.  How she always is with you.  It’s not the red head’s fault that you want to read further into it.

*

At the end of the night, you’re both pleasantly buzzed.  You walk a little, agreeing to find somewhere for one final glass of wine before heading home for the evening.  That’s how you end up side by side on a small couch in a dimly lit wine bar. 

You’re not quite sure how it happens, but one moment Melissa is talking about new recipe ideas she has, and the next she’s leaning in, her intentions unmistakable. 

You pull back, one hand resting on her shoulder to keep a distance between you.  The hurt expression that crosses her face doesn’t escape your attention.  “Sorry, I just…”

She shakes her head.  “No.  No, it’s fine.  I just thought, we were having a good night, you seemed to be enjoying it, you thought I was hot.”

“I was.  I do,” you tell her.  As awkward as this situation may be, you owe it to her to be honest.  You’re well aware she doesn’t make friends easily, but she let you in, and for that alone, you refuse to let this moment go without making it clear why you’re refusing her.  “I think you’re beautiful,” you tell her.  “Beautiful, stunning, gorgeous.  Take your pick or take all three.  I think you’re amazing, and that’s why I can’t.”

She frowns, not understanding.  The whole evening had gone better than she had ever hoped it might.  Rendering you speechless before you’d even made it in the building had given her the confidence boost she’d needed to believe that Barb’s hunch that you liked her might just be true.  Then there was way you responded to her flirting, and now your words? 

“I can’t be someone who helps you scratch and itch, or fulfil some curiosity,” you say, smiling sadly.  “I can either have you as my friend or my everything, Melissa.  I won’t survive some middle ground.”

At this, she sits back, looking at you.  Really looking at you as your words sink in. 

“I’m sorry,” you sigh, ducking you head.  “I just…needed you to know.  I didn’t mean to ruin tonight or for things to get so heavy.”

“No, don’t apologise,” breathes the red head, scooting closer.  She reaches out, gently cupping your cheek.

“Melissa.”  Your tone is a warning.  One you hope she heeds. 

“I’ve never been someone’s everything.”

You look up at the quietly spoken words to see Melissa smiling shyly at you.  Your breath catches in your throat at the realisation that you hadn’t been reading too much into tonight.  It had felt like a date because it had been.  “Then maybe it’s about time you let someone show you how it feels,” you whisper in reply, closing the distance between you.

[allwormdiet]

Arc 7: Buzz, Concluding Thoughts

Jesus fucking Christ

Man, remember when it was just Taylor and Rachel hanging out with like twenty dogs? I miss that. Can we go back to that. Please.

God it's so sad to see that Taylor is legitimately the first Undersider to make any inroads with Rachel and now that progress might have been well and truly fucked by her departure

It was cool to see Taylor developing more with her powers, figuring out new ways to use it. Also very cool of her to stab a fucking Nazi in the hand.

Another reminder that Taylor's bullies are all fucking maniacs, and also that Taylor's newfound confidence is seeing some unintended consequences.

Brian... okay. The kiss was really presumptive on Taylor's part, that sucks and that's not on him. But that man's got his wires crossed something fierce if his "sisterly affection" for Taylor reads as romantic attraction not just to Taylor's desperately lonely self (which, easy to fool I think) but also Lisa's interpersonal capabilities. Like, the social manipulation power thinks you're hot for her, my guy, what's that supposed to mean?

(Also what the hell would Aisha think if she heard the sister line, like for real)

Fuck the Empire, fuck Purity, fuck all of these Nazi rat bastards, I hope the Endbringer eats them all because apparently that's what we have to rely on for sticking it to them when the Protectorate can't send in one assist to put literally any of these guys away.

No significant gripes about the actual fights against the Empire, taking down Stormtiger and Cricket (plus fending off Hookwolf) was very cool, and the rooftop tangle with Rune and the alley fight with Night and Fog had some really neat and tense moments.

And then there's fucking Coil. I fucking hate this guy so much, he's so stupid and so cruel and for fucking what. Being the mayor of crime? And the mayor of heroes? And the boss of the actual mayor? What the fuck is even his problem, truly. Can't even doxx a bunch of Nazis without almost getting his subordinates killed, and when they confront him about it his defense is basically "i forgor," what the hell.

Dinah's scene is good in one specific and interesting way, providing both short-term information about Skitter's mounting dissatisfaction and the slightly longer-term information about the approaching Endbringer, but it just. Mm. Dinah's written weirdly, like that's not how twelve-year-olds talk. And I hate every word that Coil says to her.

Skitter's departure from the team is hard to read and hard to reread, honestly. She just. She finally had something going right in her life, for once, and she was willing to gamble everything on that continuing to go right. And she lost. And now she has to go back to them with the weight of that confrontation, that departure, hanging over every interaction, because she's doing what a hero would do.

Getting insights into Miss Militia and more of a look at the Protectorate was interesting, but mostly it's just pity for Hana and, yet again, concern about Armsmaster. Mfer can't stop coming off as concerning.

So, I was told by some friends that when the sirens start is a good time to consider the end of "Part One" of Worm. The Endbringer comes with a significant change in status quo, although I only know some of the details, so if I'm going to ruminate on the story so far, this is the time for it.

I might do that tonight or else give myself time to ruminate on it. We'll see how it goes.