#so I was a little nervous that I'd have to struggle to learn it all over again but nah

[autobot-ratchet]

I've got the first expression challenge sketched out and lemme tell y'all

I still fuckin got it lmAO

[factual-fantasy]

29 asks! Thank you! :)) 🍕

This is a good question :00 and it kind'a got me thinking..

If there's a situation effecting Ingo only, and its making him feel down... it'll be easier to tell. His frown is more genuine, and he doesn't talk as much. Emmet will notice pretty quickly..

But if Ingo and Emmet are sharing a stressful or upsetting situation? Ingo will go big brother mode and put all his emotions aside to comfort and calm Emmet down. After all is said and done, Ingo will find time to himself to cry it out or vent his frustrations alone. Just so Emmet doesn't have the extra stress on his shoulders.

I can imagine Emmet is aware that Ingo might bury his emotions or brush them aside sometimes.. but I can see Emmet not being aware that Ingo does it this often or with this intense of emotions. If he knew I'm sure he would make an effort to reach out to Ingo more often and comfort him too..

That makes for a good comic idea ngl.. 👀

Howdy and Poppy actually need the most work out of all the neighbors <XDD

I have this general idea that Poppy's house was built by her parents when she was little, and she's lived there ever since. I have- I'm sure a very common headcannon- that she struggles with anxiety and usually deals with it by staying on her peaceful little property.

For Howdy I mainly have ideas for his friendship with Barnaby. I imagined when he first came to the neighborhood he was kind'a nervous about meeting his new neighbors..

But thankfully Barnaby came along and broke the ice. He came on in, complimented the shop, cracked some jokes, bought a few things and had a chat with Howdy. In the end they learned a bit about each other and he made Howdy feel relaxed and welcome. :))

tbh I have no idea <XDDD I'm assuming there's hair gel, hair curlers and prayers involved XDD

Wally thankfully isn't so tired he's at risk of passing out- but I can see him frequently falling asleep on benches or tables <XD In that case Barnaby will likely be the first to find him and gently wake him up

@littlebluemew

He'd probably be spooked out of his mind might and go straight to Ratchet for help <XD

@milk-powrit

You know? I actually haven't thought much about them.. I considered that they knew about Julies wishes to become a neighbor an just didn't stop her. I should work on them more tbh..

@glitchhayden418

WAIT NO LETS TALK ABOUT THIS--

(In response to this post)

<XD Boy do I need all of those things- 💀💀 also thank you! :))

@holly-opal

:DDD Thank you!! :)))

@babqftim-questers

<XD In my pinned post I explain that I cant really draw my FNAF Au stuff atm,, nor do I feel like I have the mental energy to do so..

But hey I'd thought about coming back to Deltarune so that's something.. <:DD

oooo neat! :00 I've doodled some of the Unova Pokémon as slimes recently.. perhaps I should give the Conkeldurr line a go! :00 Maybe I can make the veins work <XDD

Boy have I, its all over tumblr XDD

THATS THE COMFORT IN THE HURT/COMFORT RIGHT THERE BABY LES GOO 💪💪💪

But for real, thank you! :DD I'm so glad to hear you like hurt/comfort too! And that you feel I do it really well!! :DDD 💞💞

In my AU, Eddie and Frank are just friends. Mostly because I don't like drawing or writing lovey dovey content for characters that aren't my own.. ehgk- 💀💀

Also thank you! :))

I have no plans for him to discover the truth, but i have plans for Eddie to eventually go "something is very wrong with this neighborhood, and something is very wrong with me."

I do have plans for Home to be the culprit behind Eddies predicament. Mostly because I want Home to be the main/only powerful and seemingly malicious entity in the neighborhood <XD

As for Frank and Eddie, I explain in the ask above that they are just friends in my AU :0

And thankfully, no. My Barnaby does not chase Eddie for being a mailman. XDDD

My version of the koopalings didn't look after JR, Kamek and Kammy did mostly- :00

And I cant remember the order of ages I gave them.. but I know I made JR the youngest, and Ludwig the oldest :00

Thank you!! :DDD I'm glad :}}}

So far I don't have any plans to for Wally to find out home is alive- and the house never does anything to make Wally suspect its alive :00

If you kept waking up at night, you wouldn't assume your house is alive- you would probably be just like Wally and assume you have some kind of weird insomnia problem..

If you heard strange groans and cracks in your house, you wouldn't assume its alive. You'd be like Wally and think "ah, makes sense. This house is super old, weird creaks and groans in the floorboards is normal." ..Get the idea? :0

@gummy-wyrmonastring (I cut out the images because they're not mine <XD)

(Slime rancher comic in question) AAAAA thank you so much!! :DD I'm glad you liked my comic!! :))

And I've heard of Undertale yellow,.. I cant say I'll play it- but I've heard good things about it that's for sure! And I've seen a lot of cool fanart for it too.. 👀👀

@whereismycupofcoffee

I cant recall ever having a dream that was better than reality- and so far this summer has been the worst in my life.. 😅👍

WAAHGHGG THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! THIS IS SO SWEET!!! 🥺🥺💞💞💞💞

@cry-stals

Ahh sorry, Y/N isn't apart of my Au <:/ And neither is the welcome home website- My AU is through the perspective of the puppets world being a real world :))

The text is google translated to-

"Hello! I just wanted to say that I really love your art! Your Slime Rancher AU and Welcome Home AU are very good! I hope you continue to create great works for us! Sincerely, - Japanese followers"

My response:

AAAAA Thank you so much! :DD Im so glad to hear that you like what I make!! :)))

ああああ、本当にありがとう！ :DD 私の作ったものが気に入っていただけてとても嬉しいです!! :)))

@hershelwidget (Ask was sent after this post I think)

Thank you!! :DD And I believe I know the movie you're talking about!! :DDD Its with the 9 little doll people right? I don't remember much of the movie- but I remember thinking "what on earth is happening-" and "wow this just got super dark what the heck--" XDD think it was a great movie!

@minnesotamedic186

Oooo! It sounds horrifying! :DD I'll have to look into it.. 👀👀

The only thing I can recommend is references, references, references. <:/ That's what I do!

Also thank you!! :)))

@nerdy-aroace (Referencing thins post)

AWWW THAT'S ADORABLE YOU'RE SO RIGHT FOR THATTTTT 😭😭💞💞💞

Well that's simple, Arceus created all the slimes, evolutions and all. Probably 100s and 100s of each line. And then they just filled up the planet. The final evolutions created more slimes and the first stage evolutions ate the plorts of the bigger ones.

(Sorry for the late reply! This got buried💀)

WAAHGGGG THANK YOU!! :DDD

[livesworthlivingau]

Lives Worth Living Chapter 24

ISAT/Two Hats spoilers below! CW: Negative self talk.

"I... I heard you had a bit of an... 'episode'?" (Loo-... Vale asked, looking to you with a nervous glance. You finish pouring their cup of tea as they sat at the table, pausing for a second while looking away.)

"Y-Yeah... I... I found your star..." (You say, looking down at their chest, seeing a bit of that scar through their clothes. They bring a hand up to place over it, lowering their head a little.)

"... I'm sorry to have caused you so much worry." (You sit down across from them, staying silent for a moment before finally forcing some words out.)

"What happened?"

"... I made a wish... I wished for a life of my own, so you could keep yours and I wouldn't need to steal it from you... Of course the Universe couldn't just give me what I wanted without having a little fun first though, so it sent the star in my chest supernova~!" (They begin to explain with that oh so familiar smile plastered on their face... Despite them looking so different, you'd still recognize it anywhere.)

"So I had to tear it out of my chest... It hurt worse than anything I've felt before, even worse than swallowing it and feeling it burn out my insides... I did die for a moment there I think, if Nille hadn't been there it might have stuck." (They note with a playful smile, finally lifting their tea to sip it.)

"N-Nille?!" (You weakly shout, not having expected to hear her name during all of this.)

"Oh! Yes, I forgot to mention that, didn't I? After I... well.." (They fall silent for a moment, looking to you then away again... You lightly place a hand over your heart for just a moment, you both knew what they were referring to...)

"After that, I ran and ran and ran... And ran straight into Nille... Heh... Imagine that, running from my problems, only to run right into the person you all were looking for..." (You lower your head a little, unsure how to respond to that. They seem to notice this.)

"Sorry... These are my problems, not yours. Regardless, we started travelling together, and she's been helping me... figure myself out, I suppose? Where I fit in this universe now that there's no going back..."

"L-Loop-" (They wince heavily at being called that, you quickly cover your mouth with your hand.)

"S-Sorry... Vale, I... You'll always be welcome here." (You offer, you know the gesture probably won't mean anything, but it's the truth, and they need to know that.)

"... I don't think the others will feel that way when they learn what I did to you..." (You both fall silent for a while after that. They were right, your family loved you too much to just let that slide... but did they have to know?... Could you keep lying to them forever?...)

"Stop, Stardust... I know that look..." (You perk up, looking back over at them... you forgot how bad you got at hiding your 'thinking' faces over the years.)

"It has to come out, they deserve to know... and I deserve whatever punishment that brings..." (You pause for a moment, gathering your thoughts, trying to find some sort of solution to this. You look back at L-Vale, come on, get that into your head, VALE! VALE! VALE! They look really distressed about this. You lay your hand on the table, offering it for them to take. They blink a bit, looking back up at you, then your hand again, hesitantly bringing theirs up to lay onto it. You give theirs a firm, comforting squeeze.)

"I thought I'd lost you... twice now... I won't let a third time happen." (You say, as confident as you can through your raspy voice. They give a slight smile in response, squeezing your hand back.)

"Thank you, Stardust... I'll do my best to make things work this time..."

(You both sit in silence yet again, occasionally sipping your teas, it was a bit more of a comfortable quiet now as you were just glad to have them back.)

"So what happened to your voice?"

"... Do you remember when I said the island's name?" (They suddenly choke on their tea, coughing and struggling for air as it went down the wrong pipe.)

"Stardust?!" (They shriek with worry. You wince some, shrinking into your seat a bit again.)

"Long story... Really bad nightmare after losing you..." (You try to explain succinctly, They seem especially worried about the mention of a nightmare, furrowing your brow and tilting your head a bit.)

"What?"

"... What?"

"Why do you... did something happen?"

"N-No? Whatever do you mean?" (They stammer out, quickly bringing their fake smile back... You sigh a bit, but drop it for now.)

"So, you've been travelling with Nille?"

"Yes, she's really quite something else." (They chuckle a bit, a soft smile on their face now.)

"Yeah she is... she got me out of a few bad spirals..."

"Oh, right, she would have been there for all that time, wouldn't she?..." (Vale brought a hand up to the back of their neck, rubbing it lightly, seeming to be nervous about what they were going to ask.)

"... Was she happy?"

"Huh?"

"During that time... was she happy?... Did she have a good life with you all?..." (They looked back down at their cup, staring into the tea for a minute, you were a bit stunned, unsure what to even say to that until they look up back up at you expectantly.)

"... Y-Yeah?... Sorry, did you mean something specific or?"

"... Tell me about it, please?" (The look on their face almost looked... desperate?)

"O-Okay... Uhhh... Her and Bonnie opened a lil restaurant in Bambouche eventually? Her and Isa hang out a lot, they've got a lot in common actually." (You say with a bit of a chuckle, sipping at your tea to help soothe your still sore throat. You peek back over at Vale, who was looking away nervously... a light blush across their face...)

"V-Vale?..." (They jump back to attention, quickly shaking the look and blush away.)

"Yes~?"

"... D... Do you..." (You blink a couple times, trying to piece things out before the realization finally hits you like a boulder.)

"YOU AND NILLE?!"

"Wh-What?! Wh-What about us?!"

"YOU LIKE NILLE?!"

"TH-THAT'S PROPOSTEROUS!!"

"Oh that's so cute!! You two would be so good together!!"

"Sh-Shut up! Th-That's just ridiculous!!"

"Then why are you blushing so much~?" (You grin wide, their face nearly lightless from how deep the blush was. They looked furious, about to yell, only for your comment to completely shut them up, crossing their arms with a frustrated pout.)

"hehe... She never wound up with anyone by the way... I think she said something about never meeting the right person?"

"... Not like that's changed..."

"Hey..."

"J-Just... just drop it please, Stardust... She's far better than I deserve anyhow..."

"... I'm sure we both thought the same about Isa..."

"... You're the one who earned your happy ending, not me..."

"Vale... Come on, you know that's not fair to you..."

"Just drop it... There's nothing more to discuss..."

"... Does she feel the same?"

"Drop. It."

"Okay! okay!" (You surrender with your hands up and a slight chuckle. Your face falls to rest in a content little smile.)

"I'm really glad you're back, Vale." (They roll their eyes a bit in response, sipping their tea curtly with annoyance, causing you to laugh weakly again.)

[choppeddreamworm]

Once upon a dream

Monty Finch x gn! Reader

Summary: your favorite pet bird couldn’t possibly forget you even after turning human. His dreams plagued with your being, A figment of his imagination is the excuse he used to brush it off, until fantasy became reality. Warnings: brief mention of human reproduction/sex (BOOKS!) , flirting, nervous! monty

Word count: 950

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Authors note: This was actually one of the first fanfics i wrote for the characters Joshua Colley plays. Never posted it cause i thought no one would be interested. But after seeing one of my mutuals post something about monty i caved. THIS ONES FOR YOU!!!

(this may be the reason why my acc is crow coded (・ε・)

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His memories were filtered only the ones with importance coming to him like deja vu. After being turned into a human by his witch now mother... he'd find it difficult to learn the ropes of his new life.

The task his mother had assigned him was always protruding  in the back of his head. It was his purpose his identity, his bird days long gone behind him. Yet he couldn't help but miss the feeling of freedom, flying through the breeze of the night sky without a care in the world. "Monty" a sultry voice plagued his dreams their touch as light as a feather coaxing him into the depths of the soft material known as his bed. A turn or two only led to more images flooding his brain, the (y/c/h) locks, their soft skin, laughter... so sweet that his taste buds rejoiced in it. Their presence felt familiar. As if he'd gone through those exact situation time and time again.

One day when out on a stroll to the library around his house a person sent his nervous system into overdrive. The books on human biology, communications and the reproductive system in his hand. Even if he had been surrounded by humans his whole life he never seemed to gain the grasp of social norms. Especially the shared relationship of romantic partners, he felt inferior.. so he wanted to control these new odd emotions his dreams had caused him.... That they had caused. His lip hung open, shallow breaths exiting while his eyes were wide taking in your form. You were so unbothered reading the back of a book, small fingers clutching the cover gently.

A few memories hit his brain like a brick, your laughter, the touch that lingered on his now covered in cold sweat neck that were once feathers... where your hands had once been. Your room littered with books and seemingly endless shelves...

Then before he could recall more a migraine took over his forehead, the books in his hands slipping off creating a big thud to echo through the library row you were in. Monty held a hand up to his head, an electric shock traveling through his body as your face snapped away from the letters in your hand and now meeting his eyes. "I'm so, so sorry" he made sure to mutter an apology before struggling to lean down without making his pain worse. What he didn't expect was for you to hastily leave the book you once had, forgotten on the shelf. "It's alright, it happens to the best of us..". Your assuring voice made his heart skip a beat, he only successfully picked two books up. His eyes couldn't help but linger on your face, your perfect eyebrows the way your nose slopped to add character, beautiful eyes.. so common yet so unique to you. Noticing this weird trance he was in you inquired, " have I met you before?". His eyelids stretched up, "-I don't really- I don't think we have, don't remember you atleast". A little hmm rumbles from your throat, "I think you're right.. after all as an avid visitor  I'd remember someone highly interested in human reproduction". You tease as you read the titles of the two books in your hands, 'human reproduction & fertility control' and the other 'the complete book of sex education'. Finding it a bit interesting to say the least.

Monty could feel his body heating up due to embarrassment, "I-I it's not that, I don't find it very interesting,I'm just it's for-it's for a project, you know science". A nervous laughter erupted from him then died down noticing the silence on your end as you finally gave him his books. Your mouths inner corners were stretched in a pitiful smile from his sad attempt at lying. Yet it was a bit genuine as well. You had been in his shoes countless times trying to explain your hobbies or amusements to other people that found them rather strange. Before he could bask in the shame for too long you stretched your hand out, telling him your name. His mouth repeated your own words, the letters of your name rolling of his tongue so swell as he just had to test it out. "-Monty, my names Monty". Both of your hands interlocked give each other a squeeze. He didn't want to let go, loving how your skin felt on his, his feathers no longer a barrier. But he eventually did.

" I had a pet bird named Monty ", hearing his name makes you reminisce. Monty's brain was flooded with intrusive urges. For him to tell you truth, that he was the crow you had held such a fond relationship with. He was your bird, your crow and you were the one he'd visit those countless nights before, his human. But he bit his lip down instead knowing his mother would be displeased if she found out. "That's... nice" he chose as his next words unwisely. "I mean not really when you haven't seen him for days.. ". The light sadness in your tone made him hold sympathy, even if he couldn't remember specific moments with you. He was sure you were a sweet human. "I'm sorry to hear that".

You try to fight the disappointment with optimism, "I'm sure he'll show up again, he's a smart bird." Those last words made his chest puff with pride, you really thought those wonderful things about him. That initial contact along with the praise you had indirectly provided him replayed in his head for days to come. He battled with keeping true to his mother's mission while feeding into his temptation to seek you out. Traveling to the book store at least once a day to see you which he did most times than not.

You both had gotten comfortable enough with each other till the point you started considering each other friends.

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[ohsohoney]

When it comes to love you're just as blinded.

Part Two

Eminem x Musician

Summary: It starts with a drunk embarrassing video, it spirals into something a whole lot more.

Note: Thank you for all the love on the last post! Figured I'd post the next part seeing as I said on the last update I have a whole story in mind for this but not sure how well it will go down:)

Set in 2014, just after the release of LP 2 || Em’s daughters are renamed here because it felt weird not to and also have different ages– doesn’t affect the story much but just a warning!

Masterlist

Weeks passed, during which I had spent a lot of my time back home dealing with Lottie’s schooling and making sure that she was mostly settled. She’d had a rough go of it last year, school being something that we both seemed to have had an issue with, but watching her struggle through some of the same problems I’d once faced was difficult and so I wanted her to know that she had the support I felt I’d never had. 

I’d been dragged off to shoots and studio sessions here and there, not much coming out of the latter in truth, but had stayed mostly confined to London. Which was why I was having a fucking mare over the fact that I was set to leave for a couple weeks without her. Not that I wasn’t excited about it all, nervous too, but it was work and that didn’t seem to trump whatever it was that was going on in Lottie’s life. Thankfully, she’d caught wind of my obvious anxiety and seemed to be happier than she’d been the previous term, had even gone out of her way to assure me that nothing would happen in the time I’d be gone.

So she was staying with her mum for a short time, my brother promising to check in on her from time to time too, even whilst he was still deployed overseas, as well as a couple friends of mine. Truthfully, if I’d had to leave her without those extra reassurances in place I don’t think I would have gone.

But here I was, across the pond doing an interview for a magazine spread and shooting in New York. 

It had been a long day, a plethora of outfit changes and little food due to the constant rush of things, so I was thankful for the short break we’d been gifted before the last set was meant to start. Although saying that, I was still stuck staring down at two pairs of heels that had been pushed into my arms the second I’d stumbled away from the cameras.

Eventually I grew tired of chewing on my lower lip and pulled out my phone.

Messages  Help Which shoes?

His response wasn’t immediate but came sooner than expected.

Messages  The Martian Why

With a roll of my eyes, accompanied by a semi-amused sigh, I shot another text back. Because in truth, what had I really expected? I’d learned all too quickly the man wasn’t made for texting.

Messages  I said help?? Forget it, can you call?

The ringing was practically instantaneous, enough so that the sound made me jump at its unexpectedness. 

“You got a foot fetish I don’t know ‘bout?”

I smiled at the sound of his voice and then laughed at the absurdity of his greeting. “Hi to you, too. And no, but if that’s something you’re into I’d rather not know.”

Marshall hummed around a mouthful of swallowed words before there was a slight sound of movement that echoed down the line alongside a door clicking shut.

“Did I interrupt?” I questioned, thinking back to the conversation we’d had earlier that same morning. He hadn't mentioned any set plans but I knew that he tended to frequent the studio at odd hours whenever inspiration hit. “I was just messing before, it’s not that important.”

“You’re fine, they can wait. Wanted to grab something anyway.” He said and the reply warmed me, there weren’t many who’d go out of their way to make time for me. Although that was just me assuming again. “You good?”

I slumped back into the dressing room chair at the ask, it was a ballache to get comfy in but I wouldn’t dare complain about it now, not after having spent two hours sat dead still in the fucking thing. “Just a long day. Got these last few shots to get done and then I’ll be free.”

My voice sounded wistful enough before my face then scrunched at the sudden gurgle given by my stomach. It must have been just loud enough for the mic to have picked up because Em was quick to question, “You eaten yet?”

I shook my head, forgetting for a split second that we weren’t on one of our usual Facetime calls. “Going to, after I get this done.”

A grunt resonated, broken up by the sound of cabinets being opened and closed, “Idiot.”

Smiling at the one word response I’d garnered, I peered back over at the shoes I still had to pick between. I sighed, “Swear it, I’m gonna head straight back to the hotel and order a shit ton of food. Probably pass out beside a bowl of gravy or summat before I have to be at the airport.”

There was a brief pause.

“Paul did sort the tickets right?”

“Yeah, Mila emailed them yesterday.” I reassured him as I reached up to rub at my eye, stopping a second short of actually doing so, having forgotten about the makeup that would have to be redone if I went and followed through on the action. “Again, you didn’t have to do that.”

“What I tell you?” He reminded me and I huffed out a small chuckle.

“To shut the fuck up about it?”

Marshall hummed once more, “Exactly. A car will be outside once you land.”

My lips pursed as I fought to dampen my appreciative grin, knowing he’d somehow hear it, even from a state away. Which was a strange thing to think about, having been an entire ocean apart for the majority of time we’d spoken. That first phone call felt like a lifetime ago almost. “Car’s a bit much, I don’t mind grabbing a cab or calling for one.”

He didn’t deign that with an audible answer.

“Em, I’m serious.” I laughed, the stress I’d felt earlier about the shoot slowly falling away, enough so that I let myself relax into the chair out of hell. “You’re already doing so much for me. I mean, the flights alone but, you’re already letting me stay with you too.” 

And wasn’t that an insane concept, but he’d been adamant on it, claimed it made no sense for me to rent some pricey room in the city when he had more than enough in that big old house of his. I had pressed in return though, told him it was more than fine, me holding up in some hotel, and that I didn’t want to feel as though I’d be stepping on anyone’s toes, or become this ominous presence that he had to keep sidestepping around in his own home. But then the topic of paps had come up, safety, keeping the album underwraps. I hadn’t been able to argue with him much after that. He was a paranoid fucker, but from what I’d heard from him in small snippets, he had his reasons.

“Car will be outside.” He repeated a second time, leaving no room for much more said on the topic, so I gave in, sliding down slightly further in the crappy chair just as a rep ran by the room calling out to me. “Got to go?” He asked, having heard the shout too.

I wet my lower lip, allowing my eyes to close for a moment. “Two minutes.” But I knew that I'd blink and they’d be over too soon.

I listened to his low chuckle resonate and let go of a slow breath at the sound, a sudden tiredness overcoming me. 

“Call me when you get back.” I heard him say, more background noise filtering through his end that told me his time was more than likely up too. “And, the blue.”

My brow pinched at the last comment he gave me before my eyes flickered back over to the two pairs of heels perched on the dresser, one black, one blue. I cracked a grin, “Go Lions?”

I could almost hear the smirk in his retort, “You know it.”

The shoot went over about as well as expected after the short break concluded. It seemed that everybody was about as ready to head out as I was, but I was just so grateful to all of them for the work and effort they’d put in that I made a quick round of thanking the few that hadn’t darted straight out the door the second they could, before I eventually followed.

So by the time I made it back to my hotel it was late enough that the lobby was rowdy with the usual partygoers and a rather large bridal party. I slipped into a lift as quickly as I could and headed straight up to my floor, all too relieved to finally kick off my shoes and topple into bed after having been on my feet since four that morning.

I didn’t earn much reprieve though, seeing as soon after I’d put in an order to room service that my phone started to ring. I groaned into the pillow petulantly before I finally heaved a large sigh and made my way down the duvet to grab at the mobile I’d dropped there upon entering.

“Yeah?”

“Ouch. Haven’t spoken in weeks and that’s the only greeting I get?”

I blinked at the startling sound of a familiar voice and forced myself back up into a sitting position, smiling brightly at the surprise. “I didn’t know it was you!” I retorted quickly, shocked by the sudden call, “I thought you would phone when you got to your next base!”

“There was a switch up, got a couple days off here after–” He paused and I knew then that something must have happened out there.

“You okay?” I murmured, voice quiet but not enough to go unheard. It was always hard hearing about the things my little brother experienced when he was out deployed, but he loved it. It had been his life since the moment he’d left home at eighteen and had enlisted. I felt foolish after I’d asked it and winced at my question, “Sorry, that was stupid. I just meant–”

Danny’s laughter filtered through then, making me feel a tad bit lighter. It was always so hard talking about serious shit with him sometimes, but if there was anyone who could brighten up a room, even one full of the walking dead, then it would have to be him. Which is why I let myself laugh too when he ribbed into me for the stumble, making fun of the way I’d gone and fretted over my poor choice of words.

“Fuck off! I’m running on like four hours sleep and have yet to eat!” I shot back at him, shaking my head at the entire conversation, grateful that we could just jump back and forth between both the good and the bad. I missed him a whole lot sometimes, it was hard not knowing if he was safe. “I’m tryna be a good sister here!”

“Uhuh,” He drolled, dragging the dull sound out. Before he switched things up, “Speaking of, you spoke to Lottie since you've been gone?”

I chewed on the inside of my cheek at the ask, falling back into the mountain of pillows the hotel offered only to glance up at the stark ceiling. “Yesterday. I’ll text her in a sec though, she’ll probably just be getting out of school.” I looked over at the clock to double check that and hummed. “Why, have you?”

“No,” Danny answered me carefully, “But I phoned mum.”

My tongue worked its way between my front teeth at the mere mention of her. “Right. What did she have to say then?” But I was already regretting asking. 

“Said she ain’t seen you. That Lotts got dropped off in some car with a suitcase a couple days ago.”

I felt the skin around my eyes tighten before I took a deep breath, “That so?” 

It was almost funny how much the woman could change and flip things around to better suit her narrative. Lotts had stayed at a friend’s the night before I’d been set to fly out here, she’d been more than happy to have been dropped off at her mums and so I didn’t know why it was now being made into a bigger deal, as though I’d shoved her in some randomer’s car without so much as a goodbye. 

He must have realised I was silently stewing because I didn’t miss the light chortle Danny tried to cover up with a cough.

“I know she’s hard work, El, trust me.” He commented after, always playing the role of referee, “Just surprised me, is all, when she said she hadn’t seen you.”

Hollowing out my cheeks to keep from taking out my agitation on him, I took a second to calm back down and find the best answer to give. “I haven’t seen her because I don’t go there.”

“What, to the house?”

My eyes slipped closed at the startled disbelief in his tone. “Where else? Why would I want to go back there, Dan?”

We knew each other so well that I could practically see his lazy shrug, it made me miss him that much more. “Just figured, you know?”

No, you don’t know. I wanted to say, but wouldn’t. I couldn’t be like her, have the kids running around trying to keep track of who said and did what. I hummed quietly to myself instead, feigning disinterest when really my skin had begun to itch at the reminder. “She okay then?” I asked just for something to say, figuring that there must have been something going on for him to have mentioned it.

“Reckon so,” He replied easy enough though, probably having recognised something or other in my voice to keep from prodding much more on the previous topic, “Sounded off on our call but didn’t mention anything. Still, figured I’d let you know seeing as Lotts is there with her.”

My eyes suddenly stung and I hissed out a curse, “What did she sound like? Slurred, or?”

He knew exactly what I was getting at with that and thankfully was quick to reassure me, “Nah, nothing like that I don’t think. Just sketchy, like all jumpy and shit– careful with her words almost.” 

“Right.” I dragged out in a slow exhale, thinking it over. The question of going back home now spun round in my mind.

“Don’t.” I heard Danny say not a moment later as though he knew exactly what train of thought I'd hopped on, “You’re working, things are fine. Lotts is fine. Everything's good. So just enjoy yourself, yeah? Stop worrying so much.”

“Hard not to.” I huffed and rubbed at my eye.

His next words sounded apologetic, which wasn’t heard too often with him. “Shouldn’t have mentioned it, just wanted to keep you in the know.”

Immediately I shook my head at his retort, “No, you were right to. I mean, you’re a world away and I’d want you to let me know if you thought something was up rather than keeping it quiet and something happening.” 

“You’re a world away too.” He laughed at me, and it was nice for just a moment to listen to the familiarity of it. 

Danny was only three years younger than me, but that gap in age had only ever felt so large when we’d been kids– me sheltering him from everything going on at home until he’d grown too old to not to understand– and now. What with me looking after Lottie practically fulltime and him being stationed thousands of miles away, us only seeing each other when the odds willed it. 

“Don’t mean that you should go and get all pissy over this.” He said, pulling my attention back, “Stressing will just fuck you up more so than you already are.”

I snorted at the irony of that. “Alright, pipe down Private Ryan.”

“Ha ha.” He deadpanned in a way that only your brother could, “When d’you get funny?”

Humoured, my scowl didn’t quite radiate enough scorn and neither did my reply seeing as I went and chuckled around it, “I’ve always been the funnier sibling. Just ask Lotts.”

“Nah, Lotts would say herself and then me.” Danny argued for the sake of it, “Face it, Els. You’re old.”

“Twat.” I shot back childishly, though he merely laughed.

“Yeah, but you’re the cause of it.” He quipped, grinning now, I was sure of it, before he went and changed the subject entirely, “How ‘bout them Giants, anyway?”

Rolling my eyes hard enough to feel a slight strain, I granted the idiot a small chuckle. “You actually care enough to ask?”

“Nah,” He breezed on through a heavy breath, “I’ll stick to the FC, thanks. Just figured since you mentioned you were out in New York.”

I hummed softly, peering over towards the window. The blinds were now open, not still pulled from when I’d forgotten about them in the rush I’d been in this morning, so I figured someone must’ve opened them when they’d come in to clean. Which, even after all these years, still made me feel weird. Sure, it was their job but I hated the thought of people clearing up after me. Even more so when I remembered having had the same role down at the local pub back home. 

“It’s fine, chilly, but it’s October, you know?”

Danny’s ever typical smirk was prominent in his next set of words, “Still warm over here, think I’m actually catching a tan.”

Chuckling, I kicked my legs out over the duvet. “I’m so jealous it hurts. How is it out there anyway? Never been to Cyprus, heard it’s lovely– that’s still where you’re at right?”

He acknowledged it in a soft hum, “Yeah we are, and it’s alright, not as good as Mali though. Miss it there, the food, the people.”

I smiled softly to myself at the nostalgic yearning he voiced. Vaguely remembering his few mentions of a girl during our short calls and odd texts when he’d been there, but I didn’t ask. Thing was with Danny, if he wanted to talk about something he would. Otherwise it was like squeezing water from a sodding stone. “You know where you’re headed next?”

“No, on leave for a bit after this so I’ll find out sooner or later.”

I perked up at that. “What, you headed home then?”

It had been a good few months since I’d last seen the kid in person, let alone had him back home with us.

Danny must have anticipated my excitement because he laughed brightly in turn and his voice was full of warmth, “Yeah, so you’d best get ready to see my mug in a couple weeks.”

My mind tallied up the next month or so of my schedule. I was in Detroit for the next two weeks on an odd sort of break I’d somehow managed to pull, seeing as I was still somewhat ‘working’ and had put in extra hours before flying out. Then I’d been asked to do a couple of video interviews, mostly to keep up appearances and hint at new music in the works– but I could do that anywhere. Everything after that was up in the air.

“You got a place to stay?” I was quick to query and he must have known what I was getting at by asking.

“I’ll swing by mum’s and pick up the spare set of keys I have there, make sure my room’s ready before I get to yours, yeah? Want fresh sheets and a gift basket waiting.”

The fucking cheek. “I haven’t touched it since you left the last time, so if you’ve got shitstained pants lying about or a goldfish in there, then I’ll expect you’ll be in for a right treat.”

“Ah shit! Forgot about Nemo.” He snarked, but it was followed by a snort, “Dick. Besides, I haven’t and you know it.”

I hummed dubiously and then laughed when he clucked his tongue at me, probably geering up to argue, but then the door sounded. I stopped short at the rapid taps and was instantly reminded of the call I’d put in earlier. “Sorry, it’s probably room service.” I told him, already sliding off the bed to head on over towards the knock, “Forgot about it when you rang.”

“No worries,” He said easily, “I’ll try and call you again in a couple days, yeah?”

I paused at that, “What? No, you don’t have to hang up!”

Danny just chuckled though and I could see him sat there humoured by my reaction as he shook that big old head of his. “It’s fine, if you look as tired as you fucking sound then you’ll be out like a light sooner or later. I’ve still got some time here to piss away anyway so I’ll text.”

I couldn’t find it in me to be much annoyed by his quip, he was probably right. “Okay, it was nice to hear your voice though.” I admitted as I went and opened the door to let in a guy with a silver trolley, I thanked him quietly with a smile of my own and a tip as he left.

“You’re welcome.” Danny teased snidely once the door had closed, “Always happy to shed a bit of laughter into your life. Can’t imagine you get too many people brightening up your day out there.”

I rolled my eyes. 

“They ain’t all bad.” I informed him in reply to that Yank reference of his, picking up a chip as I did so, they were still steaming and hot enough to scold my mouth. 

“That so?” Danny wondered out loud, “Got someone special out there, have ya?”

“Fuck off, Danny!” I all but sung, chuckling when he started calling out ‘I knew it’ and making stupid kissy noises into the phone, forever a fucking wind up. “You’re so far from right but whatever. Now can I go eat or you gonna bother me some more?”

“Yeah, yeah. Enjoy your food– and the mystery man!”

He hung up before I could even think to conjure up a word, leaving the room in relative silence. Baffled, I resorted to shaking my head then moved to pick up the few plates I’d ordered, taking them over towards the bed and turning on the tele more for sound than actual entertainment. 

I only glanced back down at my phone again when it buzzed against the plush white sheets beside me. I continued chewing, but felt my brow pinch slightly as I looked back on a few texts and emails I’d received whilst on my call with Danny. I reasoned that I could ignore most of them until tomorrow when I had time to waste waiting on my flight, but there was one that my eye got stuck on.

Messages  The Martian You get back ok?

Typically, it was me that texted and Em who called. But seeing as how the roles here had suddenly reversed I forgoed typing back and instead clicked on the little video camera icon in the top right corner of our chat. 

It rang for a beat, then two.

“The fuck’s this?”

I held the phone up a little higher at the voice, having gotten a bit lost in the lifetime show which had been playing on the tv as well as my food. Glancing down, I was glad to spot his surly face peering back into the camera and smiled, before I caught sight of myself in the small box at the bottom and grimaced. Danny had been right, I looked half dead.

“And what’s with the face?”

With a wrinkle of my nose, I pulled my gaze away from the box figuring that the first time this man had seen me was possibly at my worst so what difference did this make? Still, I answered him. “I look dead.”

He blew an amused breath out of his nose and I realised a second too late that he was walking around in a room I had yet to see, before he eventually fell back onto a plethora of dark sheets. I realised he must’ve been getting ready to turn in when I called. He looked a little tired too, eyes heavier under the dim lights of his bedroom. “You’ve got a black eye. Looks tough.”

The corner of my mouth tugged upwards at the odd compliment as I brought the phone in closer to get a better look at the eye I’d gone and rubbed earlier, smearing a shit ton of glitter and eyeliner all over my cheek. I droned in retort, wiping underneath my waterline in an attempt to somehow save it, but it seemed it didn’t work the way I hoped, not from the smug look Marshall was now sporting. I flipped him off and fell back further into the pillows, taking the plate of chips I’d ordered with me.

“I forgot to take it off when I got in.” I explained, huffing out a slight chuckle, “But I doubt that even I can make glitter look tough.”

Em appeared to tilt his head in a ‘whatever you say’ sort of way, before his eyes turned surveying. “You finally fillin’ up?”

My expression shifted at the way he’d phrased that but whilst he seemed humoured by the reaction he obviously wasn’t just asking for the fun of it. “Yeah, a strange assortment but I’ll take it.”

He looked a little bemused by my answer and so I shifted to better show him what I was talking about. I first pointed out the glass cup I had balancing nearby, perched beside a plate of gooey goods, “I got some weird iced tea ‘cause I forgot that you lot don’t know how to do it right, as well as this cake selection thing.” He hummed, hand coming up to rest on his chest just as I picked up another chip covered in ketchup. “And then just a bowl of chips. Don’t tell anyone but this hotel’s room service sucks ass.”

I watched on as he raised a brow at the shoddy American accent I’d equipped for the end of that sentence before he eventually replied, “Fries.”

“Yeah no.” I rolled my eyes, chewing on another chip just to spite him for the correction. It was one of the many things I couldn’t wrap my head around whenever I was visiting. 

“The hell they’re not.” Marshall was quick to shoot straight back, “You go out and ask for chips at some restaurant you’re gettin’ looked at like an odd fucker. And anyway, how's that a meal?”

“It’s food.” I enforced with a soft snort, pleased to have gotten him a little riled up, “At this point I’d eat gum off your shoe, I’m that hungry. And anyway, fries is only used here and in like, fast food chains?”

“Rolling back round to that foot fetish. This a hint?” He ragged, but his face remained stoic enough that I had to laugh, and loudly too. Marshall just continued on though, still stuck on the debate, “They’re legit french fries.”

“Fuck’s sake, only you call them that! Over there it’s just fried potato.”

“Exactly fuckin’ fries!” It was probably the most animated I’d seen him in a couple days, all because we were both so hellbent on being right. 

I groaned, mostly just to keep up the act. I didn’t much care either way at this point, far too exhausted from the early morning start and too little sleep, but it was nice to finally see him not stressing. Something which had become a recurrence over the passing weeks since the idea of the album had started to come into reality. 

“Whatever. We’ll just call up the Oxford Dictionary tomorrow or whatever, ask them.”

“Biased jury.” He remarked but then there was a barely audible creak and his attention was being redirected to something beyond the screen. “Hey, baby. You have a good time?” I heard him mumble, the phone having lowered a tad.

There was an excited retort that seemed to grow closer, but my breath was caught in the back of my throat at the sudden realisation of just who it had to have been.

Marshall sat up a little further, shoulders coming to rest against the headboard so that he could hug the girl that crept into the corners of the screen. He pressed a kiss to the side of her head, murmuring in her ear, and I let my eyes flicker back down to my food, feeling like I was intruding on a tender moment.

I’d always known that he had kids, anyone who listened to his music could tell you that much, and he’d briefly mentioned them a handful of times in the time we’d spoken too. But I had yet to meet either the infamous Rosie or his eldest daughter, seeing as she was fresh out of college and his youngest wasn’t often around when we did speak. 

They spoke back and forth in a soft cadence for a while and when I chanced a glance back down at my phone I found that Em had me perched on his knee, now sat up on the mattress so that he could better talk to his daughter who sat opposite. I didn’t want to interrupt or just hang up, so I took the time to tidy away the bowl I held, as well as the iced tea I didn’t much like the look of. I was quiet with it, pushing them back onto the trolley but kept hold of the small plate of cakes I had on the bedside table, having had an eye on one of the brownies since it had first been wheeled in.

I still had a couple of makeup wipes left in the packet I’d used that morning by the bed, so I used one to swipe away the heavy black sat under my eyes, internally promising myself that I would cleanse before I ultimately fell asleep.

“Really? Show me!”

I seemed to tune back in at the sound of the small voice, face a little glowy and a touch red from the wipe I’d just used but thankfully now free of smudgy panda patches. 

“You there?”

Blinking, I realised belatedly that Marshall had been addressing me there. I was confused and a little slow in reapproaching the screen, but smiled softly at the sight of Em and his actual mini me, because it was just maddening how much of him she had been given.

“I’m here.” I said, almost a little shyly, unsure but prepared to end the call so that he could spend some time with his daughter. But he went and surprised me, completely actually, because he handed the phone over to Rosie who beamed at the sudden sight of me, gaze lighting up with some sort of recognition.

She was young, I noted, younger than Lottie by a couple of years but not by many. She wore her long hair in a ponytail with a pretty bow at the very top, as well as a smile that seemed to only emphasise her bright eyes. “I can’t believe you’re the El Dad’s been talking about.”

Out of everything I’d expected her to say, that had been pretty low on the list– if it had even been there at all. My mouth parted just as my eyes darted over to where Marshall was sat just behind the girl, still in shot but off to the side. He acted as though he hadn’t heard a word, gaze stuck on the hand he was running through the end of the girl’s hair. Ah, so it was like that, was it?

“Oh yeah?” I ended up chuckling, mostly to ease my emotions and the whirling thoughts that had erupted, immensely glad that I’d had the foresight to wipe my face clean before she’d said hello. I could only guess that she’d probably heard some of my music from that reaction, before I was hastily reminded of the fact that she had been one of the few that had shown Em that video of me. 

There was a hurried nod of her head, “Your songs are some of my favourites!”

I grinned softly at that, immensely pleased by the sweet sentiment, and only hoped that her favourites were some of my newer stuff, instead of the few songs I’d realised before I’d gotten signed, those were angry and aimed at a whole other audience.

“I’ve listened to a couple of yours too.” I shot back teasingly, smile only growing when I caught sight of Em’s slight frown as well as Rosie’s own, “My favourite songs from your dad all feature you.”

She seemed to like that answer and giggled, going on to tell me a little about the last song she could remember helping with. I listened attentively, nodding along and commenting when I could, actually surprised by the amount of knowledge she seemed to have picked on whilst growing up around her dad.

It was just after she said something about the upcoming album that her eyes went wide in shock and she gasped, spinning back around to look at her dad over her shoulder. Marshall stared, baiting the kid into thinking she’d gone and let the big secret slip, which in itself had me fighting down a chuckle, before he soon cracked. 

He cowered playfully when Rosie jumped at him, giggling at the thought that she’d gone and ruined it all for him, only growing louder when the man tickled her sides to roll her off him. The camera followed the pair, landing with a thump somewhere on the floor, before Marshall was back, obviously having picked it up and holding it up high enough so that I could see the little girl’s narrowed eyed expression behind him. Her smile did little to infuse the scowl she bore. 

I bit back my own.

Em took a deep breath and steeled his expression a tad, “Try that again, girlie. I dare you.”

“Dad.” The girl complained as the man knocked her back down when she tried to kneel her way on closer to the phone. I laughed quietly at them and shook my head, catching him watching me for a second too long when I looked back, but then he was sitting over by the headboard again, encouraging the girl to join him too.

When she poked her tongue out at him, he pulled a face in return. It was a moment I was content to be a part of but which also reminded me of the days of when Lotts had been that young, back before I’d managed to score studio time or even a meeting with a label exec.

I must've been wearing an odd look because Marshall’s mouth twitched when he glanced back at me, lifting a single eyebrow. I knew what he was asking with the action and so I dipped my chin in a slow gesture to assure him I was okay.

The night continued on like that for a little while longer, just the three of us talking, Rosie telling us about the afternoon she’d spent with her sister, before Em finally managed to rouse her into getting ready for bed. I took that to be lights out for me too, listening quietly whilst he sent the little girl on her way, promising that he’d be there to tuck her into bed in just a second.

My smile was all mushy when his door rattled shut, I knew it too but was too tired to hide it so simply settled for relaxing my head further against the headboard. His face went through a rapid relay of emotions when he caught it though, before he eventually stamped out anything recognisable. I blinked blearily in return.

“‘Til tomorrow?” I assumed, chuckling softly whilst he dragged a hand over the top of his head. I noticed then that the blond was gone.

He gave a hum, voice low in the quiet of his room, “You gotta be up to catch a plane.”

A wave of anticipation hit me at the very reminder and even as sleepy as I felt, I continued to smile. “I do.”

A quiet pause dragged between us, an odd tension building. I waited for him to say something, perhaps another reminder or–

“Get some sleep.”

Or that.

I swallowed back my grin and then nodded. “You too.”

The tiniest beginnings of a curl could be made out on his lips before he shook his head and turned, leaving me with a black screen and a tally of our time spent on call.

3 hours 17 minutes

[mebemilena]

We'll make Heaven a place on Earth

A/N: i can't watch Euphoria because it gets me stressed. I got to learn about cassie and i think she deserves some loving. let's writte fluff. Also i only write for cassie howard because sydney sweeney is an adult herself.

tittle from Heaven Is a Place on Earth, by Belinda Carlisle

Artist female reader but i guess i didn't use pronouns.

warnings: mentions of sex and nudity

-

Summary: you're an artist, you paint angels. Cassie asks you to paint her. Naked.

-

The morning sun could barely shine behind the heavy clouds, the chance of a storm hitting the city again. Cassie woke up to an empty bed and frowned. She walked around your apartment, knowing exactly where to find you, and entered the small studio, a smile already growing on her face. 

"What are you up to?", she approached you, placing herself behind you and her arms around your shoulders.

You hummed at her warmth, putting your paintbrush in the cup with dirty water you've used all morning. "Just another piece.", you said, your hand resting on her forearm.

Cassie stared at your painting, a cloudy sky with a few cupids flying around. Her eyes wandered through the angels you had made out of ink as she rested her chin on the top of your head, still standing behind you. "They don't have faces...?", she questioned.

You took a deep breath before speaking, trying not to stutter. "Well.. i was thinking i could, you know... borrow your features?", you asked, biting your lip and closing your eyes, bracing yourself for a negative answer.

Cassie didn't respond though. She moved so she could look at you and smiled, yet to give you an answer.

"I understand if you don't feel comfortable about it, i can ju-", you started but she kissed your lips before you could finish.

"I'd love to.', she nudged your nose with her own and kissed you again, her eyes holding a mischeave that could make Satan blush. "On one condition though.", she bit her lip, her eyes never leaving yours.

"I want you to paint me.", she pecked your lips.  "Full body.", she kissed you again. "Naked.", she whispered, licking your lips softly and sensually.

-

The studio held a dim light, something you had prepared earlier. You had brought the chair from the living room, together with the baby blue fabric to cover Cassie's torso and part of her legs. She got to the room but didn't enter just yet, waiting by the door as she looked inside. You seemed more nervous than she ever would.

"You've painted lots of nude women, Y/N. I'm pretty sure you can paint one more.", Cassie mocked, giving you a playful smile.

You set your brushes and inks, bringing a new blank canvas closer. You watched Cassie undress nonchalantly, it wasn't her first time. She sits on the small sofa, waiting for your instructions.

"Can you lay a little? Your back to the arm of the chair. Put your arm above your head.", you instructed, holding the fabric, deciding how it would go on your model.

Cassie followed your instructions diligently, a straight face at your words. She recognized your professional tone when you were in work mode. It made her feel professional too, like this was something in between one of her fantasies and a possibility for her near future.   She had been your model before, for the painting classes you offered when you needed extra money. She had volunteered when your usual model had a problem and couldn't make it. "You're paying me to see me naked? Kinky", she joked at that time, hiding her nervousness.

"There is nothing sexual about nude painting, really. You're gonna get sore from keeping the same position and we are gonna struggle to find the right shades of ink to match the lights.", you had explained. In fact, the experience was much more professional than she had anticipated. She was sore, indeed. And the students applauded her by the end of the class, thanking her for the effort of being there like a statue, helping them study and learn. They looked at her with gratitude and respect, not like some horny teenagers watching a big boobies woman on a porn video.

Cassie smiled at the memory, lifting her head just enough to plant a small kiss to your cheek as you leaned down to adjust the fabric. You looked at her in awe, giggling when she winked at you.

The atmosphere was light and easy, the kind of atmosphere Cassie came to love while in college, peace becoming one of her favorite feelings. She did feel at peace when she met you, letting you learn about her and showing genuine interest in knowing you too. When you started dating, she'd remind herself that love is calm and gentle. Patient and kind. Like you.

-

The baby blue fabric was mostly between Cassie's legs, creating some volume under her body, the color mimicking her eyes almost perfectly . Cassie had her breasts and collarbones on display though she laid with her back to the ceiling. The position would get tiring soon, one arm folded onto her middle and the other supporting her head. 

As you sketched Cassie, she'd try not to laugh. She remembered you saying there was nothing sexual about nude painting, but she found it extremely intimate to watch you paint her alone. She'd keep your expreions to her memory. The way you blush when you look directly into her eyes, the way you lick your lips when they get too dry. 

"Stop moving.", you warned with a smile, your eyes not leaving the canvas.

Cassie's smile grew. "I feel like we're on Titanic. We should have gotten some jewelry.", she suggested.

You were finishing the sketch when she cleared her throat, watching as your eyes left the canvas and stopped at her again, curious.

Cassie got up from the chair, bringing the fabric with her, letting it  fall at her feet on the floor, revealing every little detail of her nudeness. She said no word, just stared at you, slowly walking in your direction, captivating your eyes with her own as if hypnotizing you. 

A serpent. A goddess. A woman.

Cassie.

Her firm steps took her to you and she gently took the charcoal from your hand, bringing your dirty finger to her lips, kissing them.

Cassie made you get up from your chair, pulling you  by your shirt, walking back to her previous spot by the chair and the fabric on the floor. She sits, bringing you down with her, her lips hovering above yours.

"Make love to me.", she demanded, eyes clouded with desire. "Here, now. With your angels watching us and blushing for all the noises we'll make.", she kissed your neck, biting softly on your skin. 

It would have sounded like she was teasing you, but Cassie looked very serious.

And you'd burn this building down before denying her every wish.

[definesanity]

SAGAU, wherein you teach UNO to Hu Tao, Kuki Shinobu and Collei:

There you were, thonking. Or, thinking, maybe. Point being, you were pondering, when you had an epiphany; Teyvat has card games (or, well, a Trading Card Game; yeah did you know that TCG stood for that? I didn't for a long while), so why not introduce one from your world?

It was simple; invite some calm individuals to play a round of Uno. Naturally, it came quickly, and so you say at the table, cards already out, as three stepped on through.

From Sumeru, Collei; albeit nervous, she nevertheless sat down, smiling and waving shortly.

From Inazuma, Kuki Shinobu; level-headed and calm, she was the ideal player for any card game, and seemed intrigued as well, if her eyebrows raised indict anything.

And, finally, from Liyue, Hu Tao; a given, really, for as soon as you said you could trick others, she basically jumped at the opportunity.

"Thanks for joining me," you started, smiling. "I'd hate to take away your time, but I thought that, maybe, this could be a learning experience."

The three nodded; Collei seemed less tense now, but still kept glancing around the table.

"Ah, but, I suppose introductions are in order? You don't need to say much; just your name will do."

Shinobu nodded back. "I'll start, then: I'm Kuki Shinobu, Deputy Head of the Arataki Gang. Pleasure to meet you both."

"Pleasures all mine, Miss Shinobu~" came the voice of Hu Tao. "Me? I'm Hu Tao, the Seventy-Seventh Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor! Also nice to meet you~"

"...Ahem," Collei cleared her throat, not for attention, but to prevent the nerves in her. "I'm, ah, Collei. T-Trainee Forest Ranger. Nicetomeetyouboth." she finished in a hurry, causing you to raise your eyebrow.

"Are you completely fine, Collei? I'm not forcing you to play," your voice was gentle, and you knew not to make her uncomfortable.

Collei shook her head, however. "A-Ah, no, I'm good. Just a little nervous, is all."

Hu Tao smiled back. "Aw~ Don't worry, Collei! We're all friends here; don't worry, I don't bite~"

Shinobu nodded. "The same with me; we're all here to have fun, right?"

Collei returned the gesture, and then looked at the cards in front of her.

"Right, the game; this is called UNO. The goal is simple; the player with no cards left wins. As for the rules..." you cleared your throat. "In front of you is seven cards; to not show them to anyone unless you play the card. The cards go up from one to nine, and are in four colours, as you can see; red, blue, yellow and green. You can only play a card that is the same colour or the same number. With me so far?"

The three nodded, though Collei's was a bit late, and so you continued, "When you reach one card, you must declare it and say, 'Uno'; if you don't, you'll be called out and be forced to draw two cards; should you not have any cards matching the colour or number, you must draw until you get the colour, number, or a Wildcard. I'll get to that in a moment.

"Next, Special Cards; the Plus-Two you may have, if placed down, makes it that the next player must pick up two cards; however, if they play a Plus-Two, it will stack, and will become the next player's problem."

"So, say if I placed a Plus-Two, followed by Hu Tao, you, and then Collei..."

"...Then, you will be made to pick up six cards, yes, heh."

Shinobu shook her head. "I guess we must be careful with that..."

"Next, the Uno Reverse, or the No U card; it reverses the order of player rotation; say, Collei used it, instead of it going to Kuki next, it would go to me, and then follow reversed order until another Reverse card is played."

"Uu..." Collei groaned, rubbing her temple. "Who designed this?! Why does it have so many rules?!"

"If it helps, you won't struggle for long; you'll pick up on it soon enough, Col." smiling, the green-haired girl shakily gave one back, with a thumbs up to follow, of which you also mirrored.

"Now, the Wildcards; the one with a circle, if played, allows the one to change the colour of the card to anything they want, regardless of previous colours."

"So if I played it after Hu Tao placed down a red..."

"...You could very well make it another colour yes, Collei~" a giggle then followed. "Or, ya know, keep it the same for me to win, hm~?"

"...And the four allows you first change the colour of the rotation, and make the next person draw four cards."

"...What if I placed a Plus Four on top?"

"Then you unleash hell, Shinobu."

"...Hmm..."

"Well, if that's everything?" three nods followed. "Then, let's begin!"

This is going to be something, alright, heh.

[daddysfangirls-dc]

The Arrangement

Ch 3 Meet the Butler (Grandfather)

Damian Wayne x OC!Female

Prev | Next

After breakfast, everyone disburst to their respective duties for the day, leaving only Damian and Alfred home. And with the events of the previous night Damian was relieved to be left alone. On one hand he didn't want to deal with the many questions and assumptions and on the other hand he wished to speak with Alfred alone. 

"Alferd"

"Damian"

"Do you wish to meet her?"

"... I'd very much like to meet your fiance," with emphasis on the word Fiance.

"She's free this afternoon."

"I'm sure your father-"

"The invitation was only extended to you."

Alfred stood silent for a moment. Only a moment. " Very well."

-

Learning she was compromised, she quickly left, taking any evidence of her presence. At Damian's insistence, she made plans to leave the city before nightfall but after she met with Alfred.

She was very excited to meet Alfred. Damian held him in high regard, higher than anyone else, and thought of him as a grandfather. His approval and acceptance were more important than anyone else's. (She believed it all stemmed from how he used to idolize Ra. Alfred was a much better role model.) He had all of Damian's respect, and with everything he had shared with her, she knew he deserved it. She was very excited to meet Damian's Grandfather. 

She was also very nervous as if he thought little of her or thought she was unfit for him. She had no doubt the relationship would cease or continue, but she struggled a great deal. She didn't want either of those, so she had to make a good first impression. He needed to like her. 

That is why she is currently sitting in a small tea house in the city. She is aware of Alfred's taste for tea and figures he likes it. And if he doesn't, well, this isn't his regular tea house, and they would never come back. She sat up straight as the bell rang, and she stood up as Damian stepped inside, with Alfred following. 

"Hello, Mr. Pennyworth. It is nice to finally meet you," she said as she bowed before him. 

"It's nice to meet you as well finally, Miss?" 

"Syn, Syn Minamoto Sir. Damian has told me so much about you." 

"All good things, I hope," he said, glancing at Damian as he pulled out their chairs.

"I wasn't aware there were any bad."

"There aren't," Damian said as he sat beside her. 

"He's too kind".

The waitress came, taking their orders before leaving them alone once again. 

"Ms. Minamoto, tell me about yourself?" the integration begins.

"As Damian has told you, we were arranged. My family is similar to the Al Ghul clan in some skills and values, but my family isn't trying to dominate or take over the world. They quite like their position." she quickly corrected herself at the end when she saw the skepticism on his face.

"And do you have the same values as your family?" she looks at Damian for a moment, and nervously wipes her hands on her dress. A green dress that he had picked out for her.

"In my Clan, family, and blood is very important, and I believe the same. My clan is okay with... killing. Blood will spill if it makes things easier or gets the job done. While I am more than able, I consider it the last option. When all else fails, when it is necessary. I know your family doesn't-" 

"I have values different from those of my son. I do not believe that everyone deserves life. Nor am I against taking one."

"Alferd was in the serves before he came to work for the family."

"And I served my queen well," he said with a smile. The waitress came with their order, and they waited until she was gone before continuing their conversation. " What brings you to our city?"

"Damian," she spoke without thinking and then blushed when she realized. Damian blushed as well. "I just wanted to see him, be with him even for a little while. Letters and phone calls aren't always enough. Not that your efforts weren't appreciated, but they very much were." Damian took her hand, squeezed it, and gave her a small smile. Letters were nothing compared to actually hearing each other, and calling was nothing compared to feeling each other. It was rare that they were never in each other's presence. They always treated it as something precious, as it was.

"Don't you two make a handsome couple"

-

Their meeting lasted about two hours before Syn had to depart. She left quickly, promising to stay in communication with both of them.

"Your father isn't going to be happy about this," Alfred said, glancing at Damian from the side. He chose to sit up with him on the way home this time. 

"Did you like her?" he ignores his previous statement. 

"She's lovely-"

"Alfred," he sighs 

"She cares about you. She is kind and has a soft heart but is not weak. She's strong."

"Strong enough to survive our family?" 

"I don't know"

Damian closes his eyes and leans his head back. "I don't care what he thinks or feels. Any of them. I'm not going to let her be ambushed and villainized for a profession I myself took part in at a time, and Red Hood still takes part in. Or affiliations which Red Hood, Red Robin, Cain, and myself have. It's uncalled for and unfair." he says 

"Your father isn't going to like this," Alfred warns 

"Unfortunate for him," Alfred takes a deep breath, " I don't actually care."

"Today's action will have consequences."

"Let them come."

-

[pelorsdyke]

ronancetober - day ten: modern au [featuring a piece of my fic with every guitar string scar on my hand]

Unknown: Um, hey! Don't know what Steve told you about me, but I read your piece on the unionization efforts at the capitol and it was super awesome. I totally don't mean to be creepy at all, but I'd love to hear more about what you learned.

Nancy feels herself smile, a little bit, when she reads the message. It's clearly stilted and awkward, Steve's friend strangely nervous, and Nancy wonders what this girl knows about her.

Nancy Wheeler: Hey! Not much, if I'm honest. Steve said he had this friend who read my latest article and could she chat with me a little bit. Don't worry, he didn't have time to say anything too embarrassing in a single text message.

There's a beat where Nancy watches the ellipses appear, disappear, appear, disappear, on and on and on. Steve's friend seems uncertain about how to respond. Nancy wonders if this girl is one of Steve's many adopted children. No way to know, she guesses. Finally, a response appears.

Unknown: I wouldn't discount Steve's ability to embarrass me in a single text.

Unknown: But I guess that's about the shape of it, yeah. I was a union steward back when I used to work at an ice cream chain with Steve, so the subject is near and dear to my heart. Plus, and I hope this isn't too forward, you write absolutely beautifully.

So not a high schooler, Nancy assumes. There's something warm that settles at the base of her spine at the compliment, even from some unknown friend of Steve's. She's had to work hard for her place among fellow staff writers, so it's always nice to hear people say she's earned it.

Nancy Wheeler: Not forward at all. I mean, I know you're Steve's friend who worked at an ice cream shop and who loves unions. We're practically best friends already.

This time, the reply is immediate.

Unknown: Are you being sarcastic, Nancy Wheeler?

Nancy smirks at her phone, pleased no one is in her apartment to see her staring at it like an idiot.

Nancy Wheeler: Me? Never.

Nancy Wheeler: Maybe a little bit.

Unknown: I see how it is.

Unknown: You're lucky you're cute.

Nancy flushes. Are they flirting? Can you flirt with someone you know nothing about? She does seem sweet, awkward and unfairly charming for a few minutes of text conversation, and Nancy knows Steve likes her. No, Nancy reassures herself, she doesn't even know what this girl looks like. Hang on, she doesn't even know her name.

Nancy Wheeler: You seem to have me at an unfair advantage.

Nancy Wheeler: What's your name, Steve's Friend?

The ellipses appear again. Nancy didn't exactly think that was a hard question, but Steve's friend seems to be struggling with it.

Unknown: Is it super serial killer-y if I say you can call me R?

Nancy Wheeler: Absolutely.

Nancy Wheeler: But I'll figure you out, Steve's Friend. You can be R for now, but don't underestimate my detective abilities.

There's another pause, but the ellipses are quickly replaced with a reply.

Unknown: That's what I'm afraid of, Wheeler.

[smolwritingchick]

We Should NOT Be Doing This

Another one I found! I will most likely change the song they dance to but for now, I kept everything like it was with some minor changes. JenKook alone in a practice room, dancing. I guess a little suggestive at the end! Not sure when I'd put it in the story but a smol brainstorm! Years ago when I watched Tinashe's Company video, I loved it and thought about JenKook doing something like this.

---------

“You ready?” Jungkook asked, stretching his arms with a huge smile.

“A little. I just hope I get this right.” Jen responded.

“Hey, you’re dancing with me. You’ll get it right.” he winked.

She giggled and nodded before going to pick a song on her phone. Jen had asked him to help her with this routine she’d been learning for fun. It so happened to have grinding in it and Jungkook was more than happy to help with that, making the dance a duet instead. After putting her music on shuffle, ironically Body Party by Ciara came on as they glanced at each other with knowing looks.

“Wow.” Jungkook chuckled softly.

“Well, this song brings back memories.” she set the phone down and walked over to him. “I remember being so nervous the first time we had to do something like this. I kept freaking out on the inside and you kept telling me to relax.”

Getting behind her, he kissed her cheek. “Not so nervous anymore, huh?”

“Yeah, thanks to you. All right, let’s run it from the top and find a rhythm.”

Going over the choreography, things went smoothly and then they went to focus on the grinding. With her back against him, he guided her as they made sure their movements were in sync. As time went on, her hips came to a halt when she heard him groan softly near her ear. 

“You good back there?” she asked as she felt him hold her hips tighter.

“I’m great,” he answered with some strain in his voice.

“You sure? Sounds like you’re struggling to me.” she teased.

“Real funny.”

“I mean if you can’t handle what I got back there, just let me know.” she decided to grind against him abruptly.

“Jennie,” he warned in a hiss which made her snicker. 

That sparked a competitive streak in him. He wanted to prove to her that he could handle everything. Suddenly, she felt his hands begin to wander and his warm breath on her neck as it made her tremble softly.

Maybe she had spoken too soon.

“F—focus, Kook.”

“I am focused. What are you doing?” a playful glint was in his eyes from what she had seen in the mirror.

“Okay, now you’re just distracting.”

“Nah, you’re just getting a little sensitive.”

“Oh, okay. This the game we’re playing, now—ah! Behave!” she exclaimed with laughter when he abruptly squeezed her ass.

She pulled away from his grasp and smacked him on the chest as he kept giggling. “You play too much!” she complained with an amused smile.

After playing around and repeating the routine a few more times, they decided to perform it. Say It by Tony Lanez blared out in the studio as they got in position.

“Five, six, seven, eight,” she called out as they began to dance. 

He was behind her, following her movements as they became in sync.

You gon have to do more than just (say it)

You gon have to do less when you (do it)

The two glanced at each other with smiles as they danced next to each other, having fun vibing off each other’s energy.

And you know, you know

And you know, in this foreign car let it go

Grabbing him by the shirt, she turned her back to him, pressing her body against his. They slowly grind to the beat with his hands on her hips. After body rolling behind her, he had made her laugh when he whispered in her ear, encircling his arms around her waist. 

But now you know that I want you, and you want me

But I don’t know, you know I know

Getting back into the dance, they continue their routine, with occasional strong chest pops and freestyle dancing.

Say it baby, do it baby

Show it baby, prove it baby

Crouching down, Jungkook crouched close behind her, following her. The dance was going so well thanks to him. Her movements were solid and on beat and the best part was that she was enjoying herself.

When she slowly body rolled as his hand wandered down her body, Jennie was gently pushed down on the floor unexpectedly.

Bewildered that she was looking up at the ceiling, she turned her head to Jungkook, staring at him in confusion. “What the heck are you doin—“

Cut off, she was kissed instantaneously as he hovered over her. He had been wanting to do that all day. This was the most time they spent alone this month thanks to his hyungs always being around and their busy schedule. Having this moment was enough and he wanted to take advantage while they could. To kiss and touch her without the rest of the guys around to tease them.

As their kiss deepened, the sultry beat and last verse played out while she ran a hand through his sweaty hair. The routine was long forgotten as they got lost in each other.

All I’m tryin’ say

I just wanna see your body move in different ways

He soon began to travel down to her neck as her breath quickened. Whatever had gotten into him, she was sure enjoying it. But they were in the studio, what if someone walked in?

All I wanna do is, come close to you

You make me come thru, I get so close to you

As the song faded out, her music shuffled to The Weeknd’s Acquainted, playing in the background while they continued their heated lip lock.

“Jungkook…we can’t do this here, we’re going to get caught,” she warned breathlessly, gripping tightly onto his shirt.

“The music is loud and I locked the door. I have been trying to get you alone all month. We’re alone here, relax. We’re fine.” 

"You want to do this, here?" she looked at him in surprise as she squirmed under his touch. "We are not doing this in the studio,"

"You want me to stop?" he searched her eyes for any reluctance.

"I...we're in a dance studio!"

"Alone," he grinned and went back to kiss around her neck, making her sigh. "With loud music to drown out any sounds,"

"Ah...we should not be doing this..." she sighed under his touch.

"Tell me to stop and I will stop," he whispered in her ear.

"Don't stop," she moaned softly and closed her eyes.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes..."

"Okay," he easily lifted her from the floor as she wrapped her legs around his waist.

With his lips never leaving hers, he walked straight to the mirror, pressing her up against it.

[blueesnow]

(3/6) Otori Eiichi's Private Story [Utapri Live Emotion]

Ch 1: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 6 with Eiichi)

-Photographic Studio- Eiichi: So this is my standing position. The lightning…looks a little dim. Looks like it'll be much better if I hold the perfume with my right hand…hmm. Haruka: …Eiichi-san! Thank you for your hard work. Eiichi: Oh, Nanami Haruka. I heard that you'll be the one in charge for the CM's song. So you came here to observe huh. Haruka: Yes, I heard that you were having a visual photoshoot here. Congratulations on being appointed as an ambassador! Eiichi: Why thank you. I, for one, am honored to be entrusted with the role of a face of such a traditional brand. Eiichi: To think that the name of Ootori Eiichi will be recorded and engraved in the long history that has been passed down throughout the years. Just thinking about it gives me shivers! And with this, HE★VENS's name shall be spreading around… Eiichi: What's wrong, you had quite a look on your face. Were you having problems on your composing? Haruka: You can sense it huh… Truth to be told, I've been told to take a retake on the demo song that I sent before. Although they said the direction was already good, there's something quite off with it… Eiichi: …I see. Well then will you let me listen to that demo. (choices) <Please do!> Haruka: Please do! To think that I could hear the opinions of the cast members, especially from Eiichi-san…I would be very grateful. Eiichi: Such a greedy and optimistic attitude towards music itself… Very good, Nanami Haruka! Eiichi: Standing still will gain you nothing. Only those who can move forward shall be the one who reach the highest level. <I'm sorry to bother you> Haruka: I'd like you to listen to it… but somehow I kinda feel bad for bothering you. Since I've been to told to take a retake and all. Eiichi: It's still a demo right. There's no need for you to apologize since it's still an unfinished song. Eiichi: The hesitations and struggles that a composer faces along the way as they went to go and create a music… To be able to witness that is quite a blessing for myself. (back to story) Eiichi: You had the data on your phone, right? I'm going to listen to it here, so let me borrow it. Haruka: O-okay, here. Haruka: (I wonder what kind of feedbacks that he would make after listening to it. Oh no, I'm getting nervous…)

Ch 2: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 11 with Eiichi)

-Photographic Studio- Eiichi: …Indeed, this won't do. Haruka: Right… I do feel that it's quite half-baked too. But is it because the tempo is bad…or maybe… Eiichi: Not only just the tempo, but the overall composition seems unbalanced. The strings are way too strong and it drowns out the goodness of the melody. Eiichi: It seems that you're too fixated on the brand image, that you've lost sight of the sound that you need to accentuate. Haruka: (It's true that I'm still confused as to what exactly should I convey into this song. And it even shows through the sound…) Eiichi: There's no need to make that face. Don't you have this photoshoot for today? Eiichi: Take a look and feel the concept of this project in person. I'm sure that this will be a great experience for you to learn more and help your songwriting. Eiichi: Make sure to burn that image into your mind and the answer will surely become clear to you. Don't forget that you're the composer that we've acknowledged. Haruka: …I understand! - Eiichi: … Haruka: (What a nice photoshoot… But, somehow I feel like there's something different than the usual Eiichi-san. I wonder why…) Eiichi: Can I please check the picture that we took just now? ...Thank you, I really appreciate it. Eiichi: …Should I move my hand a little more forward? Or wait, maybe I could also change the angle too… Got it. Eiichi: Can we go with the sideway pose for the next one, please? With this, I'm sure that it'll make this beautiful perfume shine more brightly. Haruka: (…Ah. That's it…!)

Ch 3: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 21 with Eiichi)

-Photographic Studio- Haruka: Eiichi-san, thank you for all of your hard work on the photoshoot! Eiichi: Thanks. From the looks of it, it seems like you finally figured out something. Haruka: Yes. I realized that the important thing was to bring out the charm of the perfume itself. Haruka: With this song, I was so preoccupied with all of the feelings that I put in it… I lost sight of what I was asked to do. Eiichi: That's right. It's fine to have a grasp of the brand color, but it's meaningless if you can't convey the merits of this particular product. Eiichi: And besides, the song and I are nothing more than just personification of the concept. Our job is to able to make the main character stand out and glamorously attract the audience. Eiichi: If I am remembered in everyone's memories as a result, then that means I have done my best job in it. Haruka: Yes, Eiichi-san's appearance during the photoshoot is still etched in my memory. You give off a sexy aura, it was a perfect image for the perfume… Haruka: The fact that you were able to bring out that much charm must be due to your deep understanding of the brand, isn't it? Eiichi: Thanks for the feedback. But if we're talking about effort, the same goes for you as well. Eiichi: With how you came here yourself to the photoshoot and get yourself inspired, it was all your own effort that you made it this far. Haruka: Yes, I'm really glad that I came here to watch this photoshoot. Also thank you for making me realize something important. Eiichi: I simply just did what I had to do. In order to make the best CM, every single element must be perfect. Eiichi: Obviously the song is also one of the important elements. I'm sure that you will create something that exceeds my imagination. I have high expectation of it. Haruka: Thank you so much, I'll do my best…!

Ch 4: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 31 with Eiichi)

Ch 5: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 41 with Eiichi)

Ch 6: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 51 with Eiichi)

[makeyoumine69]

"did i give you permission to do that?" + "have it your way, then. just be prepared for the consequences." + "aw, it hurts? too bad. you're gonna keep taking it until i’m satisfied." + "i'd hate to do this, but you're giving me no choice."

Kinks: Dubcon, Teasing (received and given), Whipping, chains(literal)

Petnames: slut, kitten, darling, my love

Hello, my dear! Thank you so much for another request, I really hope you like it! I really couldn't stop myself writing it, lol.

— [MASTERLIST]; [1k Followers Celebration Masterlist]

It seemed that your role-playing had gone too far when Patrick blindfolded you and took you to an unknown place where you were eventually stripped and chained to the floor by the metal collar-like necklace.

When he finally removed the blindfold, your eyes watered from the dim light around you, but then they were wide open at the sight of him, playing with the whip in his so-fucking-skilful hands.

"What's wrong, kitten?" Bateman inquired mysteriously, looking down at you standing on all fours. "Nervous?"

Gasping, you swallowed hard and tried to move into a more comfortable position, only to be whipped; the sound of the blow echoing painfully in your ears before a piteous wail escaped your half-open lips.

"Did I give you permission to do that, slut?" he growled, tracing the tip of the whip along your cheek. "You really need to learn how to behave."

Bateman crouched beside you, pulling on the chain and grabbing your neck, enjoying every miserable sound you made.

"Pat," you hiccupped as he teasingly pinched your hard nipple, accompanying it with another whip stroke. "Please, s-stop!"

"Why should I, darling?" he hissed as his fingers continued to work on your swollen peak. "You didn't listen when I told you to stop seeing Paul Allen."

"But I didn't! We just met in the restaurant and… a-aaww!" you cried as the whip struck the sensitive skin of your thigh, causing tears to form in the corners of your eyes. "It was just an accident ..."

"Aha," he grinned, tugging on your hair. "Get down on your knees and open your mouth for me. Open it wide so I can see your fucking throat."

Trembling, you had no choice but to obey. The current situation became even worse when you felt yourself dripping so badly that you were about to scream from the way your body reacted to all the things Patrick did to you, even when they crossed the line. This man was a wholesome red flag, but still he set you on fire just by looking into your eyes.

"Uh, such a bratty little kitten," his mocking, low voice sent shivers down your spine. "I told you once, that I would let you have your way with Paul, but you should be prepared for the consequences if you made a mistake. Do you remember?"

Meantime, Bateman unzipped his pants with his free hand, the whip roaming across your rapidly rising chest.

"'Yes," you gasped, so close to passing out from the tension in your lower belly. "I'm really sorry."

Patrick hummed to himself, towering over your shivering little form. "I hate to do this, but you gave me no choice."

With a dark smile on his perfect face, he slapped one of your breasts - you instantly ached from the burning sensation on your skin, but he didn't even give you a chance to struggle as he shoved his beefy dick into your mouth.

"If you use your teeth, I'll kill you," his statement was so cold-blooded, while the way he thrust down your throat was so damned savage. "Mmm … you take me so fucking well ... "

Whimpering, you concentrated on saving your ability to breathe, helping yourself with both hands as his cock was really huge, you were drooling hard, you could feel the mixture of your liquids running down your chin and falling on the scorching skin of your breasts. From time to time, Bateman would force you to look up at him, because he always liked to see you choking on his dick, with your eyebrows knitted together, and he also liked your high-pitched, pathetic squeals when you struggled to take his length as far as you could.

"My slutty girl … arrghh, so slutty," he croaked, pushing his hips harder against your face and growling as you massaged his tensed sac. "Yes-s, mmhhm … I love your mouth, but I still have to fuck you."

You gasped loudly as he pulled out of your mouth with a squelch, and then Patrick moved away for a short period of time that you used to pull yourself together.

God, you didn't even know what was going to happen next. Just a few minutes later, you were shaking immensely as this bastard plunged a powerful vibrator into your slick pussy and put tight clamps on your sore nipples. To silence your wretched screams, he was about to use a gag, but first he bent down to your face to grab your chin as he craved to make eye contact with you.

"Any last words, slut?"

"Fuck y-you." You retorted in a challenging manner.

Chuckling, Bateman just admired the cunning smile on your face, stroked your cheek for a moment, and then gagged you a little harder than he had planned, but he enjoyed your pitiful whimpers anyway.

Whistling playfully, Patrick positioned himself behind your writhing body as the vibrator buzzed painfully inside your pussy, causing your inner walls to spasm so intensely. After he brought you down to all fours, he quickly spit on your tight asshole, rubbing a few circular motions into it before he began to ram in, causing you to wriggle underneath him in seething pain. It was crazy wet mess, your eyes rolling back in your head as he began to pound into you, his huge dick seemed to be hitting your brain.

"Aw, it hurts, darling? Too bad, argh… you're going to take it until I'm satisfied."

You only manage to mumble some nonsense in reply, finding yourself full as never before and trying to break free, but all Patrick had to do was pull on the chain to keep you close and soon he had you spread out on the floor, pinning you down and holding you there with his massive muscles; his hips rolling against yours, trying to find the most sick angle as he wanted to fuck you into oblivion.

"Shit, you're so fucking tight … gonna fill all your holes," your pathetic attempts to pronounce something only threw gasoline on fire, spurring him to slam into you even harder. "You're going to learn to obey me, my love ... I promise ya."

[kiefbowl]

Can I ask for advice on how to... Act more assertive? I've been so quiet and shy my entire life but I've been trying to stand up for myself more if that makes sense. It's still really hard though and I haven't... Broken out of my shell? Ever since I've been walking by myself more I've been harassed a few times and I want to learn how to not look so weak or whatever. I just want to have a more open personality in general without being scared to share my feelings and thoughts, and you seem like a good person to ask

Sure, great question. I was once a shy shy shy child, I had to build my confidence up a lot with this regard. My first piece of advice is to stop being so hard on yourself. Stop calling yourself weak etc. The only way to start become more assertive is to respect your emotional responses. Don't think for a second that strong, witty, take nothing women don't have their moments of fear and hesitation. The way your body responds to threats and danger is natural, and it has some form of trying to protect you.

To piggyback on that, don't assume that being assertive protects you from harassment necessarily, or that you will look any different if you gain the confidence to talk back. You're not responsible for how men talk to you, ever.

But any way let's get to the cool advice:

Practice in small, safe groups first. Don't go picking fights with random men when you're walking home at night. Instead, give yourself a little goal of speaking up more the next time you're with your friends, etc. Like all things, practice builds the ability. Practice builds the confidence. Practice builds the instinct. So, start small. If you want some ideas, you can try: being really insistent about where to go to eat ("I really like Blah Blah, and I'd like to go there."), asking for a specific conversation topic when there's a lull ("Hey, I've had something on my mind lately, I want everyone's opinions"), things of this nature. As you can see, they aren't mean. You can be assertive and nice. Practice the less scary stuff first.

In that vein, don't be afraid to be awkward or do it "wrong" (you can't do it wrong, but for the sake of this point). If you sit there quietly wishing you'd go "man shut the fuck up" you'll never learn how to say "man shut the FUCK up." Instead - do the first step of what you think you can do. "uhm excuse me, I didn't like that" even if you're stuttering and sweating bullets is the first building block. Plus, honestly? If you're clearly nervous, that shows some gusto and bravery, sometimes you get more respect by acting like that.

You can tell your friends/family that this is something you're trying. I know, you might think "that's awkward" well cut that out that's not the kind of attitude you're practicing! Say to your mom privately "Mom, I'm trying to be more assertive. I want to speak my mind more, can you help when dad interrupts me." Say to your best friend privately "Friend, I'm trying to speak my mind more. I want to be more assertive. Can you encourage me if I start to struggle in conversation?" I mean, why not? This is a great chance to practice asserting yourself while getting help to continue.

If this is all great but still scary and you still don't know how to start, and you want like a magic bullet task list to just start somewhere, you can start by editing your language. Stop saying "maybe" when you mean "no". Stop saying "I guess" when you mean "no". Or, when you mean "yes!" You have to stop equivocating. Try being as direct as possible when speaking up. Again, this does not have to be mean. It doesn't have to be smart. It doesn't have to be witty. It's taking the time to consciously be aware of when you say things like "I think it would be nice to go together to the party if you want to" and try to say instead "I would like to go to the party with you, what do you want?" ADDITIONALLY: You can correct yourself mid sentence. Forget if it's awkward, you don't care if it's awkward anymore, you only care about practicing what you want. "I think maybe - I mean...I want that, yes."

The next two are really really important that they're going to be their own list, because if you've gotten this far I bet you're thinking "Yes, but how??" and these are the two that tell you how:

5. You have to sit with yourself, undistracted, and think yourself into confidence. And you have to do that for the rest of your life. And that's what every confident person is doing all the time, and they have weak moments where they fail even if you don't see it. You have to be the source of your own internal logic that makes it happen. And you might think "well if it was that easy, I would just do that." No, it isn't easy. And yes, you haven't tried hard enough. You haven't found the logic that works in your mind that you can't refute. YOU have to give yourself time every day to reflect on your life, who you are, what you want...and you have to sit there and backwards engineer the argument that leads to the answer you want. You have to make yourself get that epiphany. You don't wallow on what's wrong with you, you think "I want x-specific-thing, and I know I want that because...and to make me believe that deeply I need to think...what? What do I need to think?" You have to sit with yourself until you think it, because then you can't say you don't know. Personally, I'm deeply motivated by the weight of knowledge that we have finite time to live. I'm deeply motivated by my knowledge of my own female subordination and what I lose if I hold back. I'm deeply motivated by the fact that I can't guarantee the motivation of others. Maybe these will be your same thoughts, maybe they won't. No one can answer this for you.

6. you have to look out for other people. when other people are walked over, you have to advocate for them. when someone interrupts someone else, you have to say "wait, I wanted to hear what so-and-so had to say." If your friend is wilting in the group, you have to get everyone to bring them back in. If you are constantly internalizing you will never gain confidence. You have to be connected to the world around you, and not obsessed with what's going on in your own head. The longer you project your being out, the longer you realize what's going on in your head all the time isn't all that important. And in a strange catch-22, that's when you get the confidence to defend it like it is all that important :)

Good luck!

[jacksfandomrandom]

I read one AU that was similar to my trans genderbend headcanon that it have me motivation to write this. That fic that inspired me was LuxTheChaotic's Genderbent series on AO3

How Eve Became Steve

Notes: Before I start, I'd just like to say that I do not wish to erase lesbians and or the sexuality. This will NOT be straightwashed either. Only genderbended. it's not sex-bended though because Vaggie will be a trans man and Charlie is a cis man in this AU. I am really sorry if this offensive.

Tw: t slur

Also this technically was requested by anayapookie on wattpad

Summary: Genderbend AU where Vaggie falls because they tried to tell Lute they were a man. Charles, the prince of hell, finds him and helps him recover from his injuries and start to socially transition.

Being an exorcist, Vaggie had lots of friends. Her fellow comrades and training partners were fun to hang around and joke with. Joining the army definitely helped her learn to socialize with fellow heaven-born. But everyone (in heaven at least) has that one friend that they can go to when they're struggling. In heaven, there's not many struggles though. Most of it would just be venting like about how you had to wait an hour in line at the zoo. However, Vaggie had Lute. They often comforted each other when things went bad. Their dorm rooms were right next to each other and they often had sleepovers when either of them was feeling lonely, couldn't sleep, or just wanted to goof off. They were good friends.

However, Vaggie had something she really needed to get off of her chest. It had been bothering her for a long time and she hated just keeping it all in. Lute was the only one she could trust. So one night after training, Vaggie pulled Lute away from the group preening.

"Vags, is something wrong?" Lute asked when she pulled away into an empty hallway in the dorms. She noticed that Vaggie seemed nervous or anxious.

"Um... yeah, kind of. I just... I really need to tell you something. It's something serious and important to me." Vaggie fidgeted with her fingers. It was a nervous habit that she often did.

"Alright," Lute simply said.

"B-but can you promise you won't be upset? Or mad?" Vaggie asked.

"Man, this must be serious if you want me to promise. But alright, I guess I can,"

After a long pause and a few deep breathes and hyping Vaggie up, She finally was able to tell Lute.

"Lute, I'm... I'm a boy," Vaggie disclosed. Lute waited for a second, hoping it was some kind of joke. Once she realized that she was in fact being serious, her emotions turned to shock and anger.

"No, you're not. God created you as a female," Lute argued, raising her voice a little.

Vaggie felt her heart drop. This wasn't supposed to happen. Lute was supposed to accept her and treat her as if she was a boy and help her transition. Maybe she could try to explain it to her a little more?

"B-but I don't feel female, Lute! I wanna be a boy! I want people to call me Vicky and He. I don't want boobs or these thighs. I want a boy's body!" Vag- no Vicky exclaimed. Lute couldn't even look at him. Her face was filled with disgust. Before Vicky could even say anything else, Lute summoned her sword and stabbed his eye out. Screams filled the dorms and people from the main common room came rushing into the hallway. Vicky fell to the ground, wailing in pain as blood streamed down his face.

"Sinful trannys like you have no place in heaven," Lute bellowed before grabbing his wings from his back and ripping them off. The torturous screams had almost made Lute feel pity, but the thought that her best friend turned out to be a sinful freak, overturned that pity.

Vicky couldn't see much, close to drifting off into unconsciousness due to the overwhelming pain from his mutilation. However, he managed to make out the first man Adam, emerging from the crowd. He shook his head in disappointment before snatching the halo from him and pushed Vicky into a portal leading to hell.

Charlie Morningstar, the prince of Hell was taking his evening walk around pentagram city, singing some musical tunes and overall just in a good mood. He tried to see the best in things. However, his cheerful singing was interrupted when he heard small cries and sobs coming from an alleyway coming up. He ran over there, worried that one of his people was hurt. However, instead of seeing a sinner, there was... an Angel? Covered in blood and...mutilated. But how could that be? The extermination wasn't for another 5 months.

"Hey, are you okay?" He asked, slowly approaching the angel. Vicky looked up and saw the demon approaching him. He just calmed down from a panic attack but it was starting right back up again. He tried to scramble but just backed up against the dumpster, causing pain to shoot up his back.

"Aargh!" He let out a shriek of pain and doubled over.

Charlie didn't know why but he pitied the angel. They just seemed so scared and in pain. He took a deep breath and slowly crouched down to them.

"I'm not going to hurt you. Sure, I'm a little confused on why you're here, but you can explain it to me later, "He pulled out a couple of bandages and began to cover his bloodied eye socket, "I'm Charles by the way, but everyone just calls me Charlie"

"Va-...Victor... or Vicky" The injured angel mumbled.

It confused Charlie that the angel had such a masculine name but such a feminine physique. But he could ask questions about that later.

"Here, use this to cover your back. I'll call my driver to come pick us up and I'll patch you up at my house, okay?" Charlie placed his tux coat over his shoulders to cover the bloody mess on his back.

Victor was confused on why this man was being so nice to him. Wasn't he in hell now? He went against God's ways and he was supposed to be punished. However, he didn't even get much time to think before a limo pulled up and he lifted. That single lift caused everything to throb with so much pain that his body just gave out and pulled him into unconsciousness.

[not-a-space-alien]

K&J x MMSS 4: Valen & Jim Part 4

Part four of the fourth crossover with @whumpsday!

K&J masterlist

MMSS masterlist

K&J x MMSS crossover masterlist

To be added to the taglist, contact @whumpsday

Warnings for this chapter: Burns, “it” as a dehumanizing pronoun, mentions of/fear of sexual assault, brief talk about eating disorders 

In this chapter: The joy of Jim's homecoming is soured by an incident with vampire hunters that suddenly reverses the roles between Jim and Valen.

***

The movie-watching is oddly serene after years of constant fear and torment. Jim cozies up with Valen while they watch, finishing his apple. He's quiet at first, just like with Kane, but slowly starts to open up as it goes on and he remains safe.

Valen reciprocates the cozying up, wrapping the both of them in a blanket on the couch. Valen has never been happier to have his own little haven, with its soft lights and quiet lack of anyone to bother him. He's delighted to hear Jim start talking more and more, acting like a person and not a neurotic prey animal.

When the time to leave gets nearer, Valen asks if Jim wants to stop at the store again for more food, knowing humans need to eat so frequently.

"Nah, I think I'm good," Jim declines with a nervous laugh. He is pretty famished, having only had one meal in three days, but he can wait. Last time was harrowing enough. Next time he eats, it’ll be in his own kitchen at home. "Maybe I could call my sister to meet us, especially since it's during the day and it'll be safe for her? Then I won't have to trek."

"Of course, that's a splendid idea. Tell her to meet us somewhere, and you'll have a nice smooth journey back. I'd love to meet her, as well."

Jim calls, letting Liz know they're leaving and she can meet them near the signs loudly proclaiming the dangers of crossing the border.

“Tell him I said thank you for saving my brother,” Liz says on the other end. There’s no need– Valen’s hearing is good enough to hear it from where he sits.

"I'm just happy I was able to help do a good deed,” Valen responds. “Hopefully the karma will come back around to me." Valen has always struggled with feeling like a monster, so that feeling being alleviated is enough of a reward on its own, to know he wasn’t universally hated among innocent humans.

They won’t be out for so long, but Valen gives Jim a water bottle anyway, just in case, before wrapping himself up thoroughly for going outside.

The streets and sidewalks are once again empty, cleared in the face of the impending sunrise. Valen hands Jim the car keys in the rising light. "Here, you should drive. In fact, if you wanted to keep this wretched contraption, that would be fine with me. I hardly ever use it, and it's more trouble than it's worth."

Jim grins. "Seriously? Oh man. You are the best. Free car, that rules. Liz probably started using mine when she learned to drive, so that's perfect, now we'll both have one." His smile wavers at the thought that he missed Liz learning how to drive. "Well, buckle up, beaks."

He drives out to the border with little issue, the streets deserted. What had caused him so much grief, years of wanting, nearly dying in his desperate attempt to make it home… it’s like nothing, now. Jim almost feels like he’ll wake up any second, the whole thing a too-pleasant dream.

Liz is there–Liz, in the flesh, so much more grown-up than when he last saw her–with three other people. They all wear vampire hunter’s gear: including Liz, to Jim's surprise. The blue-haired hunter by her side looks the calmest of them all, while the two men look a bit on-edge.

Liz runs forward, and Jim gets out of the car to embrace her.

"Oh my god, Jim!" she cries.

Valen watches Jim hug his sister with a smile on his face. None of the humans can see it, of course, because he's wrapped up head to toe, they can barely see his eyes. He squints against the light to see who all is here. There are four humans, which is more than he expected. It makes him a little nervous, especially since they all appear to be vampire hunters. But Jim's sister seems kind, so he doesn't worry overmuch.

He opens the passenger's side door and gets out of the car, leaning on it to watch Jim and Liz crying with each other. He glances nervously at the sign demarcating human territory from vampire territory, knowing full well if he crosses it, he's put a target on his back.

"Hey, why's it getting out of the car?!" one of the hunters snaps, hand itching toward his weapons.

Jim interrupts his tearful reunion, pulling away from Liz. "Don't fucking call him that! And obviously he has to get out of the car, what's he gonna do, get home from the passenger seat?"

He realizes too late: he's being defiant, again. Kane would beat him to a pulp for this. This is why he’s supposed to be silent, so he doesn’t run his stupid mouth. He immediately shrinks back, eyes cast down, trembling. "Sorry. I'm sorry."

"Cool it, man."  The blue-haired hunter elbows their companion.

Valen gets nervous. "I intend to come no closer, sir. We can talk like civilized individuals, I assure you." He holds his hands up deferentially. 

The words go right over the head of the hunter, who can only focus on Valen’s hands moving and gets spooked. He is clearly a novice hunter, his hands shaky and unpracticed as he draws his pistol and shoots at Valen.

The shot just barely misses Valen, but it does graze his head. It rips his mask from his face, taking most of his hood with it as well, exposing him to a faceful of direct sunlight.

He erupts into an earth-shattering screech at the indescribable pain, sharp and animalistic. The windows of the car wobble with the sound, and the one closest to him shatters and spills glass shards everywhere. He would have never gone outside during the day if he'd known he was risking this. He's instantly blinded by the white-hot light, like two searing branding irons stabbed directly through his eye sockets straight into his brain, and he curls his arms above his head and drops down, fumbling for the shadow of the car to save himself.

"Fuck!" Jim dives for Valen, shielding him with his body. He grabs Valen's mask off the ground and clumsily shoves it back on his face, then strips his own shirt and throws that on top for good measure, ensuring that Valen is fully covered.

"What's wrong with you?!" Liz screams. "He saved Jim! You were just supposed to come ‘cause it's the border!"

"I'm sorry! Shit!"

"Get him out of here," the blue-haired hunter says.

"Got it," the other man agrees. Valen can make out a car driving off.

"Valen? I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Jim sounds like he's crying. "I'm sorry, I never meant for you to get hurt."

"Jim," Valen weeps, groping forward. He opens his eyes, but the topmost layer of skin on them has been burned, and they're crusty and sightless. "Jim, am–is he–what's going on?"

Jim holds him. "He's gone. He knocked your mask off, he's an idiot. You're safe now. No one here's gonna hurt you. I'm sorry. You're–you're gonna heal, right?"

"I–Yes, I should–I've never felt..." It still fucking hurts, so so bad, even though the sun is gone. He will heal, right? He's never gotten a sunburn before, and he knows they theoretically heal, but damn is the lingering pain overwhelming, far more than any other injury he's sustained. "Jim, please don't leave me here, I can't see, please don't leave me alone out here."

"I'd never. Don't worry, I've got you. I've got you. You wanna come back to my place to heal up? Let's get you back in the car, huh? We'll get some burn cream on you, and you can rest up back home." Jim helps him back into the passenger seat. "Liz, we've got burn cream, right?"

"Yeah, I, I think so. Yeah." Liz is shaken. "You can follow us? That wasn't supposed to happen. I told them Valen was on our side."

"I'll follow you," Jim agrees. He pats Valen on the shoulder. "We're gonna take care of you. Like you took care of me."

"Thank you," Valen sobs. He's utterly shaken by how thoroughly and quickly the sun was able to completely destroy his confidence. He feels like a kid again, lost and scared and helpless. He'd do anything to avoid feeling the sun again. "I wasn't trying to attack, I swear." He's still shaking a little as he settles into the passenger's seat, and he folds himself down, below the window.

Jim will help me. I helped him, he'll help me back. His sister is a hunter, but she's nice, the other hunter is nice, they know I'm not trying to attack. And I can use persuasion on them if I need to. Oh god, he definitely couldn't use persuasion over a group of three humans at once, though, and his superior speed and strength would be useless if he couldn't see to know how to direct them. This must have been how Jim felt, at the mercy of someone he just had to trust would help him, unsure of if he should make a run for it and take his chances. The idea of going deeper into human territory, further into the domain of the vampire hunters, like this was terrifying.

"We know, buddy." Jim says, starting the car up again and following Liz's- well, his car. "Fuck, this is a mess. You're gonna be okay. Kane and that asshole we ran into last night got into it once a few years back, and Kane was all better by the next night. Um, I dunno if you might take a little longer, 'cause you looked pretty bad there. But I'm sure it'll still be fast."

Valen starts to calm down a little at Jim's reassuring words, just like Jim did at Valen's. He cautiously unscrunches himself, sitting upright in the seat. "Yes. Yes, thank you. Um, are–we're going into–into human territory, are you quite sure your neighbors won't–won't take notice and, and call more hunters?" He is far more afraid of vampire hunters than he'd thought he'd be–they'd always been a distant bogeyman for him, and one of them had just ruined his week with a single pull of a trigger.

"No one can tell you're a vampire when you're all covered up like that. And if anyone tries to fuck with you, they'll have to go through me. And Liz, and probably her friend. Plus, it... it seems like Liz is a hunter." Jim is not a fan of this information, but he's glad it at least makes things a little safer for Valen. "So she'd be the one who's called anyway. I won't let anyone get at you. Promise."

Valen sobs when Jim says Liz is a hunter, not finding it as comforting as Jim does. "Yes. Thank you. Thank you, Jim. Are we going to your house?"

"Yep, that's where we're going. Home. Holy shit, I'm going home." It still doesn't feel real. "It's gonna be okay. And, look, you can feed on me when you get hungry, 'cause I know it'll take a bit for your face to heal right. I'm used to it. Happy to do it when it's for you. I'm sorry it sucks right now. But I won't let anything else happen to you, swear to god. I've got your back."

Oh no. Jim expects Valen to feed on him. Valen has never fed from a human before, he doesn't want to, he's terrified of opening that door. Feeding straight from a human is supposed to be one of the highest luxuries a vampire can have. What if he doesn't want to stop feeding that way? What if he gets addicted and can't go back to blood packs? He doesn't trust himself. He can't. He goes spiraling back into the times where he went days without feeding, crushed under the weight of his depression and guilt and self-loathing. He can't go back to that.

Valen swallows. Maybe they can just avoid that for now. Maybe Valen will get better before he needs to feed, and he can just go back home and sidestep the whole thing.

"Thank you, Jim." He feels safe around Jim in a way he hadn't before with other men. Is it because he's a human, and Valen could overpower him? Then why does he still have this warm feeling when he's helpless and dependent on him? "And I'm glad you get to go home. I'm very happy for you. It's still a wonderful day overall.”

"Thank you. You gave me my life back. I'm sorry it turned out shit for you. No good deed goes unpunished, I guess." Seeing Valen so hurt and scared, because he was trying to help him, no less, breaks Jim's heart.

They arrive at Liz's place after a little while, Jim chattering soothingly to Valen the entire time.

"Alright, we're here. I'll lead you inside." He holds Valen's hand, leading him into the house, where Liz and her hunting partner wait.

Liz tosses Jim a container of burn cream while Laken, quickly introducing themself, goes around closing all the blinds. Liz smiles, despite the situation. "We did have some. And hey... welcome home."

"Thanks. Here, come, sit." Jim leads Valen over to sit on the couch. "You can take that stuff off. You're in the clear."

Valen sits on the couch and gropes at his head to remove the coverings Jim had tossed over him. He also removes his outermost cloak and his gloves. Despite the relatively short contact time, Valen's whole face is red and blistering, and the thin, delicate skin on top of his ears has peeled away to reveal bleeding rawness. His eyes have a gray, opaque layer over them.

"I'm glad to meet the two of you and be in your home, despite the rough start," Valen says. "Thank you for having me. I'm glad to see Jim finally reach safety after his ordeal."

"Thank you for bringing him home. Thank you,” Liz says emphatically. "Sorry the new guy’s a fucking dumbass. I'm gonna kick his ass."

"You're very welcome. I couldn't just leave him there, knowing what fate was in store for him. And I suppose your colleague had good reason to be wary, knowing what my kind is capable of. Although, I obviously do wish he'd had more restraint." 

"Oh please, he didn't have shit." Liz says. "It's daytime, you were bringing Jim home, he was being an asshole."

"I'm gonna put burn cream on you, okay?" Jim says gently. "It okay if I touch? Kinda gonna have to."

Valen reaches out and finds Jim's hands. "Yes, you are welcome to touch me, Jim, I don't mind it at all. Thank you."

"Alright, just hold still." Jim starts slathering burn cream over Valen's face and dabbing it on his ears. He tries his best to be gentle, but touching the burns is bound to hurt at least a little, even if the cream is soothing.

Valen clenches his teeth and lets out an occasional hiss of pain, but when Jim is rubbing the cream on the less painful parts of his body, he leans into the touch, closing his eyes and savoring the feeling. He hadn't realized how touch-starved he'd become, despite it being only a few months since his separation from Priscus, although Priscus had also been his main source of touch before that. He was very much enjoying the touches that didn't have the subtle warning written under them, the hint that later the touching would lead to more things whether he wanted them or not, a reminder that things were expected of him. It felt nice.

When it seems like Jim is done, he pulls away. "Thank you very much. It's already starting to feel a bit better."

"There you go. You're doing awesome." Jim gives him a little side hug and yawns, still on a nocturnal schedule. "I'm gonna grab something to eat from the kitchen and then probably hit the sack. Are you getting tired, too? If you can get to sleep, you'll probably heal a lot while you're out."

Valen jumps at the opportunity. "Yes, please, that sounds wonderful." He secretly hopes that Jim will sleep in the same bed as him. He feels like it would be the first time he'd sleep in a bed with a man and not have to be on guard to fend off unwanted advances. Jim is so very sweet and considerate, and seems like he would take no for an answer if it came down to it, which makes Valen not want to say no. Maybe there will (in)conveniently only be one space where they can sleep, and Jim will apologetically offer to sleep elsewhere to let Valen have it, and Valen will be able to coyly offer to share it. That will give him what he wants: Being able to sleep in the same bed as Jim without looking too eager and inviting, to have plausible deniability about wanting it later if he changes his mind and wants away from Jim, and to make Jim feel just a little bit like he is imposing and therefore needs to be extra polite and considerate to make up for it.

He takes a minute to step back from the insane mental gymnastics he'd just done. Living with Priscus had really done a number on him. Maybe he should just sleep on the couch.

"Er, I've been using Mom and Dad's room for storage,” Liz says. “Your room's all set, though. I kinda didn't touch it. Kept hoping you'd come home. And I was right, you did, so there!" Liz proclaims defensively, like someone's going to argue with her about it. "Even cleaned it yesterday 'cause I knew you were coming home. But yeah, the other bed is covered in boxes. I can go clear it, but it'll take a bit."

"You can use my bed, Valen." Jim says. "Lemme lead you up there. Your eyes are still all funky." He takes Valen's hand.

Valen blushes. "Thank you."

He lets himself be led upstairs, into the bedroom, he presumes. "How large is your bed? Where will you sleep?"

"It's a full. I guess I'll help Liz clear off the other bed, or take the couch if that turns out to be too much of a hassle? Unless… you wanna double up." Jim can’t deny Valen’s subtle hint, asking about the bed’s size, and being with Valen makes him feel safe. Like if Kane showed up to take him away, he would be protected.

"Only if you want to," Valen says shyly. "I wouldn't mind. I don't snore." He sits down on the edge of the bed and starts fumbling to take his shoes off.

"Cool,” Jim says, with a huge smile Valen can’t see. He helps Valen take his shoes off. "Here, you can borrow some pajamas,” he adds, pressing the first ones he sees in the closet into Valen’s hands. “I'll come back up and join you after I've eaten something."

He quickly changes into some himself, since he's currently shirtless and the clothes Valen loaned him are too small anyway. "I'll be back up soon. Yell if you need anything."

"Thank you. Enjoy your meal." Valen takes the time to undress himself, stripping off his many, many layers, suddenly realizing how sweaty he is under it all. He figures a bathroom might be nearby, trailing his hand along the hallway wall and getting lucky when it’s the first doorway he blindly stumbles across. He takes the time to find the faucet and splash some water on himself, drying his skin on whatever towel is nearby. He doesn't dare to clean up more than that for fear of accidentally getting himself into an embarrassing situation he can't get himself out of without calling for help.

He strips off his binder next, slipping into the pajamas. He doesn't know what pattern is on them, but they feel soft and warm. He sighs contentedly, slipping into the bed and fumbling to pull the blanket up over himself. When he finally settles in, he feels very cozy and safe despite the burns, and closes his eyes, already starting to fall asleep.

Jim comes back up about twenty minutes later, trying not to disturb Valen as he slides into bed next to him. "Thank you," he murmurs, finally feeling safe for the first time in five long years.

Valen sleepily rolls over. "You're welcome. I'm glad I could make a difference for someone in this wretched world. Sleep well. Tomorrow you will wake up for the first time safe in your own home among people who care about you."

The words touch Jim to his core. That's one of the kindest things anyone's ever said to him. "I care about you, too," he says softly, snuggling up to Valen in the small bed.

Valen curls up against Jim. It's very comfortable, and he wants this kind of touch so badly, but something is bothering him, and he won't be at ease until he broaches the subject. Despite his earlier thoughts, he's starting to get concerned about waking up to Jim trying to have sex with him. Unlike when Priscus did it, Valen is strong enough to just throw Jim off, but the thought is the only thing ruining the otherwise perfect atmosphere. If he could just clear that, he'd have the nicest night he's had in decades, he's sure.

"Um," he says, voice cracking with nervousness despite his attempts to control it. "To, to be clear, I-I'm very comfortable right now, b-but I'm, I'm not interested in having sex tonight."

The nervousness in Valen's voice gives Jim pause. He recalls the way Valen cried when his husband called, the way he called him sir so miserably. "Hey. You're safe, okay? I'd never do anything like that. You're alright, Valen."

Valen perks up, immediately more at ease. "Thank you, Jim. I know it will be a wonderful night. Sleep soundly. You've no need to worry anymore, either. You're safe, too."

Jim smiles, feeling warm. "Wonderful day, you mean, but I know you're on mushroom time and you can't see shit. You sleep good, too."

Oh this is wonderful. Jim is a human, and Jim feels safe around him, and that must mean he’s not a bad person. Valen feels safe, at ease, and validated in a way he never has before. Jim feels safe and protected in a way he never has before.

They both fall asleep and have the best rest in years, for either of them.

***

@barebarb

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[hella1975]

Hella do you have any advice for starting uni? I'm stressing about everything to do with it at the moment 😭 Also congrats on graduating!!

thank you love! and omg that's so exciting that ur starting soon. it's a very stressful time bc of how new it is and for most people it's ur first time ever leaving home and settling somewhere alone, so defo give yourself the grace to be a little scared and nervous. there's no right way of doing first year in fact i'd argue the only way to do first year IS the wrong way (of which there are thousands). accept that ur probably gonna fuck up or make bad friendship choices or make a tit out of yourself on nights out or spend too much money etc etc. first year is about figuring out how to live independently for the first time ever and honestly you won't even have it figured out by second year or third year or ever, so just LET IT BE. have fun. take every moment as it comes. try and laugh at things. don't overthink. everyone is just as frightened and clueless as you are.

some more general advice though:

make sure your student finance is properly sorted

TRY and start budgeting money from the get-go instead of learning the hard way (aka 'it's the first week of the month and i have nothing left for groceries bc i got black-out at student night' 😭)

look into societies! i still kinda regret never joining one but they're great not only for pursuing hobbies but also for meeting people. a big struggle at uni is not having a set structure to your week outside of lectures, so knowing you have certain events on certain days helps build that structure

following from that actually, that point applies to anything. the lack of structure thing really battered me in first year bc i'd get in a bad episode and the weeks would just slog past without me really noticing bc i had nothing to anchor them. i started making sunday a chore day where i did all my washing, cleaning, food shop etc on sundays and that mundane stability alone helped a lot

TRY AND BE DISCIPLINED WITH YOUR SLEEP SCHEDULE. istg every day of first year i slept until 1pm it was BAD

don't stress too much about the actual academics. this probably sounds like shit advice and im not telling you to completely sack it off, but seriously it is NEVER EVER that serious in first year. the year literally does not count towards your final grade bc lecturers KNOW students treat it as a piss up. second and particularly third year get HEAVY so have fun while there's literally no downsides to it