#so I found a little way to contribute to the hype around this fic and I hope you guys enjoy it as much as i did!!

[berlinat8am]

hi! i created a quiz that's basically my love letter to @lusthurts incredible 'how bright we burn' universe/seblaine dalton au:

which iconic moment from the 'how bright we burn' verse are you?

(warning: spoilers for the quiz and results below the cut!)

links to the memes:

part one | part two | part three

links to all the different results + their descriptions:

★ trust as the foundation of every strong relationship

★ nick coming out while everyone is high off their ass

★ the junior year warblers new year's party and everything that happened around it

★ the warblers raising robotic babies

★ sebastian getting shitfaced at his dad's wedding and turning his speech into a roast

★ the seblaine break up

★ jeff and sebastian's friends with benefits era

★ you're my favorite person in the world

★ seblaine hooking up for the first time

★ seblaine playing truth time (7 minutes in heaven/empire state building)

★ seblaine smoking and almost hooking up in sebastian's room after performing at kings island

★ i love you / the way i feel about you is ineffable

[partyofwords]

I'm Not Afraid of You ~ *Ichiro Yamada*

Summary: Ichiro has the biggest crush on you, his new employee. And his brother’s are trying and failing to hype him up to talk to you.

Pairing: Yamada Ichiro X Fem!Reader

Genre: Fluffy Drabble

Word Count: 1386

Warning: Jiro and Saburo are a little OOC

Masterlist

A/N: There needs to be more flustered, lovesick Ichiro fics. This is my contribution.

Despite what anyone says, Ichiro was not scared of her. No, never, not in a million years. He was Ichiro Yamada, manager of Odd-Jobs Yamada, a very prominent and respected business. There was no way he was scared of his new employee.

Which is why it confused his brothers to no end to see him practically cowering from her every time she so much as looked in his general direction. Ichiro was never like this, no matter where they were with him. Even amongst criminals and other dangerous people, he was as cool as a cucumber. Yet with her presence so much as in the same room as him, he was jittery and jumpy, as if a ghost were about to pop up out of nowhere and scare him right out of his skin.

“Are you okay, Ichi-nii?” Saburo asked as she was sent out of Ichiro’s office on an errand.

He was straightening up as he frowned. “I’m fine. Why do you ask?”

“You’ve been acting as if something, or rather someone, was out to get you.”

His big brother laughed, though it sounded strained. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m completely fine. Hey, why don’t the three of us go and get dinner together? We haven’t done that in a while.”

Saburo nodded slowly, unsure of his brother’s odd behavior. “Sure, Ichi-nii…”

“Excellent! Sounds like a great idea!”

Saburo pursed his lips as the two of them grabbed Jiro and headed for the nearest convenience store. The two younger brother’s glanced at each other before staring at Ichiro. He still seemed a little shaken up about the whole interaction with her. And someone had to do something about it.

Of course, that someone was Saburo, as Jiro was too stupid to notice something wrong.

“So, tell me, what’s with you and the new employee?”

At his little brother’s direct question, Ichiro practically choked on his own saliva, then cleared his throat, and adjusted his clothes. It was at that moment that Saburo and Jiro’s suspicions were confirmed. Looking away from them, he answered, “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Oh? I see.” Now, Saburo knew he was being mean, but he couldn’t help but tease his brother a little. If it would get him to stop being so weird around her, then he’d do whatever it took. “Because if I didn’t know any better, I would think you were afraid of her.”

“What?” Ichiro blurted out louder than he anticipated. “I am NOT afraid of her! I’m not afraid of anyone! What makes you think I’m afraid of her? Because I most definitely am not.”

“Right.” This time it was Jiro who spoke, letting out a chuckle as he sorted through the items on the shelves, trying to find something to eat and drink. “Because nothing you’ve said or done shows you have a crush on her, Nii-chan.”

“I do not!” He whined.

“Of course, of course.” Jiro assured him. “Nevertheless, she is nice. A real keeper, if you ask me.”

“Yeah she is…” Ichiro trailed off before snapping out of whatever lovesick haze he slipped into, and returning to gathering the food he needed. “I mean, she is nice and she’s been a very big help lately.”

“Mhmmm.” Saburo nodded, a coy smile worming its way onto his lips. “I’m glad you found someone like her.”

“No, no, no. Both of you are not going to be doing this.” Ichiro snapped, glaring accusingly between the two of them. “I’m putting a stop to this right now.”

“What are you stopping?” Saburo asked, feigning innocence, though the devilish twinkle in his eye made him anything but.

Ichiro gestured between his two scheming brothers, already feeling a headache coming on from their shenanigans. “Whatever you two are planning. You both are up to something and I don’t appreciate it. Y/n is a nice girl. You are not going to throw the two of us into some romance out of a light novel.”

“What made you think we were thinking of throwing you two into a romance out of a light novel?” Jiro challenged, crossing his arms over his chest smugly. “Maybe Saburo and I just wanted you to make new friends, that aren’t the two of us.”

Their big brother’s frustration faltered for a bit. “Really?”

“No, we want you two to make out already.” Saburo replied nonchalantly.

Choking on the air, Ichiro coughed out, “WHAT?”

“I mean not while we’re around. That would just be gross.”

“SABURO!”

The littlest brother sighed. “C’mon, Ichi-nii. We know you, or at least I do-”

“OI!”

“-And we know you like wearing your heart on your sleeve. And Y/n just amplifies those feelings by one hundred percent. Just admit you like her and we’ll leave you alone.”

Ichiro looked down at his food that he no longer wanted to eat. He didn’t know if he could admit that he liked Y/n. She was so different from his other crushes. She wasn’t someone throwing herself at him and she was everything he’s ever wanted in a girl. So why was he so nervous around her, unlike his other crushes? He knew she was a certain kind of special, but this was different. Y/n was different.

“Uh, Saburo, I think you broke him.” Jiro muttered.

Shaking his head, he said, “Y/n is different. She’s special. I’ve never met anyone like her and that makes it hard for me to approach her. She’s everything I’ve ever wanted and I’m just scared she’s not as perfect as my mind is subconsciously making her out to be.”

Saburo and Jiro shared a glance with each other. Jiro then asked, “Aren’t you overthinking this a little, Nii-chan?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean Y/n is your employee, but more importantly, she’s just a girl.” Saburo explained. “Just talk to her, get to know her a little better, and see if a relationship is possibly in the cards for the two of you before deciding on never approaching her for the rest of your life. Who knows, she might surprise you and be very approachable.”

He sighed, “I don’t know you guys.”

Someone tapped Ichiro on his shoulder. When he turned around, he could feel his face go pale. There was Y/n, in all her splendor and glory, a soft blush adorning her cheeks and a small note in her hand. Despite her fidgety fingers and the way she shifted her weight from foot to foot, she smiled dazzlingly bright at him.

“They’re right, you know. All you have to do is talk to me, Mr. Yamada. I’ve been told I’m very friendly and charming.” She explained, her glittering smile never disappearing from her face. 

She was like the sun at that very moment, that if he continued staring at her, he’d go blind from her brightness. Nevertheless, he kept her gaze, although words seemed to evade him. What could he say to his crush, especially since his brothers were right there? Any misstep and he’d be tormented for days, not only from his brothers, but from himself as well.

He cleared his throat. “Got it. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Then, I hope you keep this number in mind as well.” She chirped, handing him the little note in her hand. She then bowed respectively before departing, calling over her shoulder, “I’ll see you later, Mr. Ichiro.”

As soon as she was out of sight and out of hearing range, Jiro and Saburo instantly asked him about the paper. Upon opening it, he saw her number, printed in red gel pen and a message asking him to dinner tomorrow night at eight. As soon as his brothers saw that message, there were wolf whistles and soft teases. But he didn’t pay them any attention.

No, Ichiro was just so happy that he finally got his wish. He finally scored a date with his crush. Quickly he put her number in his contacts before texting her that dinner sounded perfect. His brothers then tried to get some details about the date, but again, he just tuned them out. His heart was beating erratically and his palms were sweating like crazy, but that wasn’t what mattered. What mattered is that he wasn’t afraid anymore.

No, he was more excited than afraid.

[bbnibini]

Hi! I really love your works but it gotten me curious if you also read fanfics? Do you have any fanfic recommendations?

Thank you, anon! That's really kind of you. 🥺💕 I do read fanfics, but not as much anymore. I'm assuming this ask is for Obey Me fics? But if not, I will include some of my absolute favourites in a future post. Fair warning: I gushed. A LOT hahaha. Please support the authors and their works! I included the fics in the hyperlinks~

NSFW fics are marked appropriately, so please click the links at your own discretion (some of them are in my public bookmarks in AO3).

Elle's Obey Me Fic Recommendations

🌸Your Coal by Angrish(LettuceBean)

Truth be told, I belong to the "forgive but don't forget camp" in lieu of what happened in Chapter 16; reading Angrish's YC and how their MC coped with the aftermath(+ how others coped along with them) felt really powerful, raw and so so emotional. It made me think and really think about how I processed the whole thing that happened. While it didn't really change my outlook on how I have forgiven Belphie for what he had done, Angrish shedding light to the unanswered questions and lingering doubts the main story have left most of its readers was done in such a thoughtful and poetic way that I found myself binge reading the whole thing.

Given that I read this whole coping with a lot of stuff as well (and may have contributed with sympathising a lot more to the vindictiveness of the MC), reading what Angrish had written was really cathartic. Their writing style is also beautiful--the way the words string together, simple, elegant, yet impactful really made MC's emotions a lot...tangible, real and sometimes, frustrating (in a good way, mind you). I also liked how they had fleshed out the other characters, especially Belphegor, Satan and the Purgatory Hall members.

🌸You'll Have to Ask Your Dad by DefenestrationProtestration

I remembered clicking on this fic because of the author's punny name, stayed for the pretty writing and reread a few several times for the characterisation and THE WRITING. I'm pretty sure I left a litany of praises and incomprehensible gushing on the comments section because of how much I've devoured this piece of art.

Even as I'm typing this review, I can't seem to organise my thoughts haha. You can tell by the writing style that the author had a lot of fun writing their prose; it permeates through the screeen...my "screen" of imagination at least. I am not joking--the writing is so pretty and vivid that I literally saw it as a movie in my head lol. I chatted with them a bit on the comments and they said the prose is more of something they had written subconsciously; it reminded me of James Joyce and how he had masterfully perfected the same technique. Of course, their writing styles differ a lot from each other, but I can see what they meant.

...as I'm typing this, I didn't realise how I haven't talked about the plot of the fic at all soz. This piece is the author's character study of Lucifer. It talks about how he was before, during and after the fall. He is a bit of an unreliable narrator, which I'm not sure if the author intended, but he has all these presumptions that miss the mark so so much, particularly at how his brothers, Lord Diavolo and the others perceive him--but reading the whole thing would make you understand why he had gotten to that kind of self-perception in the first place. And honestly? It really, really hurt to read. But was it bad? The total opposite of that, in fact! I loved how they had written the angst in this piece. So many things in the fic are "show, rather than tell" and I really really appreciate that.

Most of my brainrot about this fic is better to be explored on your own. Overall, 10/10: a definite, recommended read.

🌸Fairy Tales for the Fallen by indiavolowetrust

I haven't fully devoured all of the stories in the collection yet, but the ones I've read (Her Name Was Thousand Eyes is my favourite) was such a really good spin on dark fairy tales (Obey Me style!). It reminded me of my childhood Little Mermaid picture book for some reason. Probably the writing style(the author's writing reads a lot like a storybook) The one I had was Hans Christian Andersen's (aka the OG) version and the ending was rather...dark for a 5 year old lol. It was a big part of my life though and was probably the precursor for my affinity with sad stories haha.

🌸TieGuanYin by Taciturn

Like tea on a tiring day, Taciturn's writing style feels very homey, cozy and familiar. I love rereading this oneshot when I'm having a shitty day and imagining myself having tea with Barbatos haha. Ever had pieces of art or literature that just...relaxes you when you consume it? This one is one of my, as the youngsters say, "comfort fic" haha.

🌸glass half empty; glass half full by unagis

I love unagis' fics.♡ I also love her Childe fics. The concepts she comes up with, as well as how she delivers it is *chef kiss*. Admittedly, I read this one when I was still a Satan stan, with all the suspicions and doubts about Solomon's intentions still rampant within me. Reading him blush and become flustered is CUTE and aaaaa this whole fic is just really cute.🥺♡

🌸The Eternal Storm by @sondepoch

Sondepoch's Satan oneshot was the very first fic I read in the OM fandom so it has a special place in my heart~ I remembered how awkward it was to skim through the Satan filters, looking for a gen fic/SFW fic because around that time, most OM fics are smut (no shade on smut ofc, I'm just super uncomfortable reading them unless the writing is really pretty or there's something else going on in the story). Finding GEN AND A WELL-WRITTEN CHARACTER STUDY about my (former) favourite OM character was like I hit the jackpot. I remembered that feeling really well haha. My bias with one of my favourite forms of fic (char. study) aside, Sondepoch's writing is easy on the eyes and is definitely a great entry for anyone who wants to be in the OM fandom.

🌸Read Me by GENE515

One of my more recent reads and definitely worth a mention!♡ Read Me was a beautifully written, heartfelt two-shot about Lucifer's love, which he tried his best to express in penned words. Probably because of my own love letter-themed OM series, this one really stuck to me haha. The author is also really sweet. :3

🌸Schrodinger by fickleminder

I read this one around Halloween and it definitely fit the occasion. Schrodinger was such a great thriller/horror fic with how it set its unsettling atmosphere from the very beginning--the way fickleminder's writing just sucks you in and makes you bystand the whole ordeal between Belphegor and MC was just...so suspenseful? Nail biting? Creepy (in a good way ofc)? I won't spoil the ending, but the process and way they tackled it was a lot scarier than what I was initially bracing myself for.

🌸Siberia by @polandspringz

Seeing another Obey Me mystery in AO3 really hyped me up! Polandspringz did a spectacular job in writing this series and I can relate so much with their experiences in writing for mystery. Their writing style is easy on the eyes--I also really liked how they characterised the OM characters I have read on their series so far. There's still quite a lot of stuff left in speculation (from my most recent reading at least), and I really look forward to see how everything unfolds!

🌸Tetris Syndrome by apocketfulofposies (NSFW)

I am very very uncomfortable with smut content, so the smut I've read can be counted on one hand. ;; That is to say, TS is one of the few smut that I really, really enjoyed. First of all, Levi's characterisation is on point. It was really really interesting to get in his head and read about his thought process. What is envy? And how much does the sin of envy really define him?

I really enjoyed Levi's internalisations, as well as the author's writing style. If you want smut with a brooding, jealous otaku boy, I really recommend this one!

[bunnyywritings]

unexpected

tenya iida x fem!reader

[a/n: he’s so cute hehehe 🥺 here’s my first Iida fic, it’s your basic summer trope but...I simp for this man on the daily, I was a little sad to see that there aren’t many Tenya fics out there so I took it into my own hands, this is slightly self-indulgent but other than that, he deserves some love so uh yeah, enjoy! -yours truly, bunnyy -`ღ´-]

Class 1-A just couldn’t take the heat anymore so they begged and begged and begged until Aizawa finally gave in and planned a class trip to the beach.

Today, the girls decided to head to the mall and buy some new swimsuits since wearing the very non-flattering school issued swimsuits would be absolutely terrible. You had gone along since you didn’t really have a swimsuit, you had one from back in middle school but it hadn’t fit you anymore. So far, they had all been able to find one they liked except you. You had been to countless stores but hadn’t really found one that caught your eye but the girls insisted on going to one more store so you could look around. As you looked around, you had started to doubt that you’d actually find one. That doubt was realized when all the ones you had tried on were the wrong size.

Once back in the dorms, Momo had offered to make you one. An offer that you gratefully accepted. You had searched online and showed her what type of bathing suit would be ideal. After thanking her 100 times or so, you had gone down to the kitchen.

“Oh (y/n), You’re back. How was the mall?” I don’t think Todoroki realized how loaded that question actually was. He and Midoriya seemed to have been just chatting, eating snacks. Iida had been making some tea.

“Uhh well it was great, the girls were able to find some bathing suits.” You sat down across from your two friends.

“Is someone wrong? It doesn’t sound like you had a good time?” The freckled boy asked carefully

“I had a good time. It was nice to hang out with the girls but I’m just a little tired.” He nodded understandingly, Shoto had grabbed the packet of pocky and held it out to you in a silent offering. You giggled and accepted the offering, he nodded in approval when you took two of the strawberry flavored biscuits. You had joined their conversation about which pro hero had the best costume, a cup of tea was placed in front of you. Looking up, Iida offered you a small smile before sitting besides you and contributing to the discussion about All Might’s costume. You blew at the surface of the drink before taking a sip. It was black tea sweetened with just the right amount of honey and a bit of milk. You blushed at the fact that he remembered how you liked your tea. Too distracted in your thoughts, you nearly jumped out of your seat when Midoriya called you out.

“You agree with me (y/n), right?” Your eyes widened before you cleared your throat. Iida’s heart started to pound when he could see the mischief in your eyes.

“Well why are we even bothering to discuss All Might’s costume when Endeavor’s is clearly the best. Todoroki. Thoughts?” He had been friends with you long enough to know that you were just pulling his leg.

“Well, as much as I see your point. Why don’t we talk about how Kamui Woods has the worst costume.” Your jaw dropped.

“Okay now wait a second.” He knew that he was your favorite pro. “That’s a little much when someone like...”

Iida gave his 2 cents here and there but he enjoyed seeing you giggle and smile while joking with the other two. He couldn’t really explain why but his heart would pound harder any time you asked for his opinion or the butterflies in his stomach would go wild when you smiled.

Finally, the beach day came. Everyone had woken up bright and early to make sure everything was ready and loading everything onto the bus when it had arrived.

“IF YOU AREN’T IN THE BUS BY 9AM, WE WILL LEAVE YOU HERE! OH YEAH!” Aizawa cringed from beside Present Mic as he made that announcement. That meant that there was half an hour before you guys would leave. You nodded, amazed at the fact that you could hear your teacher while he was still outside. You finished packing your bag before getting changed into your swimsuit, standing in front of your mirror and scrutinizing your reflection. It was nothing to do with the swimsuit itself, Momo had done an amazing job. You were just...insecure. It was a one-piece with an opening at the stomach. It looked cute when you had seen it on the model online but on you, it seemed wrong. It made your thighs look like they were bulging out of the material and the pudgyness of your stomach seemed to be accentuated. Sighing, you pulled on your shorts and tank top before making your way out to the bus. Aizawa crossed your name off the list before you boarded and took a seat beside Ochako. Midoriya and Iida in the seats behind the two of you and Shoto and Tokoyami in the row in front.

Thankfully, the ride to the beach was only about an hour and a half long. Everyone unloaded the bus, as instructed by Iida. The beach was relatively empty so it gave you guys the abilities to claim a huge spot for the entire class. 1/3 of the class had instantly stripped down to their swimsuits and ran to the water. While the rest had set up the tent, some chairs, the volleyball net, or their personal umbrellas. You had offered to share yours with Tokoyami since it was big enough and he didnt seem too keen for on being in the sun too much. Even then, he had still peeled off his shirt and was sat on his towel in nothing but swim trunks as Dark Shadow had made an appearance and started to play with the sand.

You had sat down criss cross on your towel, book in hand. You had put it down from time to time to watch your classmates laughing and having fun. Midoriya had approached the two of you and asked if you guys had wanted to join their volleyball game. You had accepted the invitation but Tokoyami had politely declined. You were on a team whith Shoji, Shoto, Denki, and Shinso. Ochako, Midoriya, Iida, and Sero were on the other team. Mina, Tsuyu, Aoyama, and Momo were watching on the sidelines, cheering for both teams of course.

Halfway through the game and you all took a hydration break but you were starting to feel the heat. Quirks were allowed so with that and the fact that your quirk had to do with fire meant that your body ran warm.

“Are you okay (y/n)?” Shoji asked as he handed you a bottle of water. His question caught the attention of the others as they noticed that your cheeks were a bit more flushed than normal.

“Yeah, why don’t you change into your swimsuit?” Ochako asked, head tilted to the side.

“I-I have it on but well...” you sighed, deciding to be honest. “I’m just a little s-self conscious.” You looked away, slightly embarrassed as the words left your lips.

“Aww (y/n), no!! You’re super cute! Come one, I bet you look great!” Mina grinned encouragingly. “Plus, the girls have seen you pretty much naked before so there’s no need to be shy.”

“Mina!” There were calls of embarrassment from both the boys and the girls.

“You do have a point...” you mumbled to yourself. You walked off to the side and started to unbutton your shorts. All the boys had looked away to give you your privacy. (because they drink their respect women juice every morning)

“O-okay. D-done.” You nervously announced as you handed your clothes to Mina.

“See! I was right!”

“W-whoah! (Y/n), no disrespect but you look hot!” Denki smirked, nodding appreciatively. As the others had started to compliment you, no matter how hard Iida tried to restrain himself, he couldn’t stop his eyes running over your body. More specifically, your thighs. The way they slightly strained against the material of your bottoms made him blush. He couldn’t help but glance at them once the game had started. The way they flexed when you had gone to bump the ball or the slight jiggle they had when you ran for the ball. Don’t get me wrong, Iida likes you for you. Your personality, your kindness, and your intellect were very attractive to him but your body was a definite plus.

Your team had won the game and while Mina, Momo, and Tsu were congratulating you, Mina caught a glance at Iida. He had looked at you, eyes softened, and a blush on his cheeks before looking away.

“Ooh it looks like you’ve caught the eye of mister class rep.” She teased.

“W-what? Mina stop m-messing around like that.” You stuttered, her previous statement was making your heart want to burst.

“It’s true though! Don’t you have a thing for him too?”

“Well yeah but-“ you were cut off by her calling him over.

“Hey Iida! What do you think of (y/n)’s swimsuit? It’s nice right?” Oh how you wished the earth would split open and swallow you whole.

“Y-yes, I do. It’s very flattering (y/n).” His answer made your heart do somersaults. “May I o-offer some advice?”

“Oh uh yeah, sure.” You were a bit confused but wanted to see what we had to say.

“As a young hero, you work hard every day to get stronger and make sure you can be the best hero possible. You should be proud of your body because it’s the fruit of that hard work and well...because you look r-really beautiful. Regardless of what other people may say.” His sudden confession made your eyes widen but before you could respond, he had run off while shouting at Bakugo about the dangers of grilling without proper supervision.

Throughout the day, the girls teased you about your crush on the class rep. Currently, you were drying yourself off after having been in the ocean for a bit. You had wanted to confess to Iida. You had been slowly gathering the courage to do so, the other also helping hype you up.

“Hey uhm Iida. Would you maybe want to get a smoothie with me? From that place up the cove?” You were fiddling with your fingers.

“I would be glad to accompany you (y/n).”

So the two of you had gone off to get some smoothies. Chatting about trivial things as you waited. He had opted for an orange and carrot smoothie while you went for the simple mango smoothie.

“So uhm, before we go back. I h-have something to tell you...” he motioned for you to continue as he sipped at his smoothie. “Right. Well I just-well I...” you sighed, taking a calming deep breath before continuing. “I like you Iida, like uhm r-romantically. I have for a while now and I just thought I’d let you know.” He was silent, still sipping at his drink while processing your words.

“Well that’s a relief. I’ve been figuring it out over the passed couple of days but I have romantic feelings for you as well, (y/n). And seeing as the both of us seem to do relatively well in our normal studies and our hero studies, I could see that balancing a relationship with schoolwork should be relatively doable.” His words stunned you.

“Wait so does that mean-“ You really we’re at a loss for words.

“Yes. It means that I would like to pursue a relationship with you. As boyfriend and girlfriend.” The turn of events made you very giddy with happiness.

“C-could I hold your hand, Iida?” You asked nervously as the two of you walked back. He chuckled and nodded, taking your hand in his.

“I can do you one better.” He had leaned down, noses inches away. “If you’ll allow me to?” You nodded, closing your eyes and leaning forward to close the distance. Lips moving together, it was inexperienced but sweet and soft nonetheless. Both of you a blushing mess as you pulled away. The rest of the class cheering from a distance as they watched the exchange.

Later on that night, during the bonfire, the both of you sat next to each other. Having already changed into some sweats to protect yourself from the cold, he had let you wear his navy blue hoodie since you were still shivering. He hesitantly wrapped an arm around your waist, relaxing when you had moved closer and snuggled up to him. He watched with a soft gaze as you joked around with Shoto and the others and partaking in eating some s’mores. The way your cheeks puffed up as you gave him a tight lipped smile, mouth full of the concoction of gooey marshmallows and chopped made his chest feel fuzzy and warm.

Even as he held you close, as you nuzzled into his chest because the ghost story Tokoyami was telling was a little too scary for you, he still couldn’t believe that you had reciprocated his feelings. The girl that he had his heart set on since the second week of school was now his girlfriend. It was times like these that made him expect the unexpected.

gєиєяαℓ тαgℓιѕт (open): @ohbois-biggay-bnha​

[squadrablog]

ok I've joined the Ghiaccio hype train, could I request a Ghiaccio fic with a reader who doesn't like sudden loud noises and will definitely cry if you yell at them? they're really intimidated by Ghiaccio but they're comfortable with the rest of La Squadra, so he's struggling to be a good team member to someone who's always nervous around him. feel free to make it romantic or platonic, your writing is amazing!! 💕💕

Here you are! With the stuff I ended up focusing on I thought that shoehorning a romance in would feel weird, so I focused more on exploring the beginnings of a platonic friendship with him. Lots of awkward Ghiaccio and miscommunication but it all ends up good. :^)

Ghiaccio & Reader (platonic, gender neutral)

Ao3 Mirror Here.

Word Count: 3921

Warnings: Reader has childhood trauma w/ loud noises, not gone into in depth. Assassination job implied but doesn’t happen in text.

Under cut for length!

The last thing you saw yourself doing with your life was becoming an assassin, but here you were. You were a tough kid, scrappy and resourceful when it came down to it, but only because you had to be to get by. You always thought you’d eventually leave that old life behind. The gunshots echoing into the night from rival mafias squaring off to claim the neighborhood you lived in as their territory. The shouts from the man who took you in when you had nowhere else to go, only to berate you when you failed to pick enough pockets to meet his quotas. The way the older and meaner children would torment you, taunt and deride you, whenever you let your vulnerability show.

And you had, more or less, left those parts of it behind at least. When you joined Passione as a last ditch effort to survive you were given a sense of stability that you had never had before, and after initiation when your stand manifested as something powerful and deadly, it didn’t take too long for you to get placed into La Squadra di Esecuzione, Passione’s team of elite assassins. 

As a stand user working with other stand users you rarely relied on guns to get your work done. You were no longer struggling to get by, and although your new Capo held his team to high standards he made sure you had ample training and was patient with you while you were still getting your footing. All your teammates were surprisingly supportive; even if they were wary of outsiders, when it came to their own family they looked out for each other.

It was a dangerous life, not without its own anxieties, but it was a much quieter life. It was a life in the shadows, with a roof over your head, with work that allowed you to use stealth and silence. Even if you couldn’t exactly say you were thrilled about being an assassin you were at least surrounded by people who genuinely cared about you now, watched over by a man who never raised his voice at you for things outside your control, and most comforting of all: you never needed to use a gun.

Not all loud noises set you off, just the ones that reminded you of the violent instability of your childhood and the cruelty of your guardian and peers. Your new teammates could get pretty noisy and spirited, but the boisterous and jovial nature of their laughter, even from their more intense teasing, was a comforting change of pace. You didn’t doubt your value or the fact they respected you.

Well, mostly. There was one teammate who was a bit harder for you to let your guard down around.

His name was Ghiaccio, and to say he was loud would be an understatement. When you first met him he had been a bit standoffish, but so were Risotto and Prosciutto. You knew it would take some time for everyone to accept you as a real part of the squad, and you were ready to be patient. But as you quietly observed everyone for those first few weeks, getting a feel for their individual personalities and their dynamics with each other, you found yourself very intimidated by Ghiaccio. He was able to pal around with the rest of them, even if he was gruff as a default, but when something upset him it was like a switch had been flipped.

He was critical of his squadmates’ performance out in the field, and he never hesitated to offer his critiques regardless of how little anyone wanted to hear them. He was critical of the way people talked, constantly nitpicking everyone’s pronunciations and word choice. He was critical of the way that chores around the house got done, judging everyone’s efforts by timeliness and thoroughness.

Everyone was able to brush him off most of the time without problem. When they actually valued what he had to say they never seemed to take the mean way he said it personally. They’d had plenty of time to get used to him and sift through the bullshit. They knew when something actually mattered to him and when something was just him blowing off steam for the sake of it. They knew when it was fair to ask him to shut up and when it was best to let him get it out of his system.

You steeled yourself as best as you could in those first few weeks, just telling yourself you needed some time to understand his quirks like the rest of your squad did, but your opinion changed immediately after your first mission with him.

“Is Prosciutto teaching you anything?” he barked out at you after you two finally managed to take out your hit. You flinched and looked away from his intense gaze. You were a bit anxious about being alone with him for the first time, and you wanted to give him your best effort to impress him, but being on so on edge caused you to make some big mistakes.

“Well?” he demanded when you said nothing. You had assumed it was a rhetorical question.

“Y-yes?” you stuttered out.

“Then you’re the one accountable for fucking up today. What the hell was that?” he asked, his question ending in something similar to a snarl.

Something that was different about working with Ghiaccio as opposed to working with the others was that he argued out loud to no one in particular about random topics that pissed him off. At first you thought he was expecting you to talk to him about how nonsensical some phrase was that Formaggio used before the two of you left, and you listened attentively, but he never gave you any room to respond. Eventually you realized he wasn’t really conversing, just yelling to yell. It was very distracting and it only made you fidget and lose focus.

“I… well…” you choked out. “It’s usually quieter… on my missions, since my stand is- well, since my stand is made for stealth and-”

“Me talking prevented you from doing your job correctly?” he asked, his eyes narrowing. You just shrunk even deeper within yourself. The last thing you wanted to do was insinuate your mistake had been his fault. There was no way that wouldn’t provoke his ire.

“N-no! You didn’t do anything wrong! It was me, I’m really sorry! It won’t happen again!” you squeaked out.

“Better not,” he grumbled sarcastically with a huff before turning to walk down the street towards his car. You followed, keeping a good distance behind him, not looking forward to the ride back to the base.

---

That had been weeks ago. While you had been doing a decent job at tolerating Ghiaccio before that mission, afterwards was a different story. You actively avoided him, checking if he was in rooms before entering, excusing yourself when he came into a room you were already in, shutting yourself in your room upstairs when you heard him start up on a rant somewhere on the main floor.

Eventually it was shamelessly (or perhaps shamefully) obvious to just about everyone.

“Dude, what happened on your mission with them?” Formaggio asked in a hushed tone one time after your footsteps had disappeared up the stairs. “They’re terrified of you.”

“How the fuck should I know? They haven’t said anything to me about it,” Ghiaccio shot back.

“Uh, yeah, duh. That’s what I’m saying. They won’t even sit in the same room as you,” Formaggio muttered.

“Yeah, I’ve noticed,” he said, scrunching up his eyebrows. “But it’s not like they talk much to begin with.”

“Are you kidding?” Illuso interjected, inserting himself into his two teammates’ conversation, much to Ghiaccio’s annoyance. “I can get them to prattle on for hours about themself. They’re a real chatterbox once you get to know them.”

“Illuso, dude, have they told you the story about their mission with Pesci down at the wharf?” Formaggio asked with a big grin.

“Fuck, I almost forgot about that,” Illuso replied with a chuckle. “What about the time where-”

“Hey! Shut up for a second,” Ghiaccio snapped. “We’re all talking about the same person, right?”

Upon being interrupted Illuso narrowed his eyes at Ghiaccio before turning to Formaggio. “It’s obviously because of Ghiaccio’s poorly controlled rage. Have you ever seen the poor thing freeze up over a gunshot before?”

“No, but I can imagine. One time I tried scaring them from behind and it took them ten whole minutes to recover,” Formaggio responded.

“I haven’t done shit to them, what possible reason do they have to be scared of me?” Ghiaccio asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Well, what happened on that mission?” Formaggio asked again.

“It was pretty standard, I killed the bastard while they assisted. They did fuck up pretty bad, which is typical during training, so I pointed it out for their benefit. Then we left,” Ghiaccio recounted. “Nothing else happened.”

Formaggio raised an eyebrow. “What did you say?”

“I don’t know! I think I asked if Prosciutto was doing his job right since they didn’t seem too confident. I asked if there was anything that might have contributed to their lackluster performance, but after thinking it over they said that it was on them.”

“Sounds pretty level headed and analytical of you,” Illuso said, stroking his chin. “Are you sure that’s how you said it?”

“Probably not in so many words, I was probably more casual about it,” Ghiaccio grumbled. “Why does it matter how I said it? What’s important is what I said.”

“Ghiaccio, your brand of casual is a few decibels above what’s average,” Illuso said.

“Not to mention the casual expletives, or the casual sarcasm,” Formaggio added. “Are you sure you didn’t casually tell them to go fuck themself without realizing it?”

“No! I mean, if I was stern with them it was in the context of training!” Ghiaccio insisted.

“Are we being trained right now? Is that why you’re yelling at us?” Illuso asked with a smirk.

“This is just how I talk!” Ghiaccio said, bringing a hand up to his temple. “Ugh, I don’t fucking know! Maybe I yelled at them? I remember being very straightforward. They seemed kind of on edge, but I just assumed that’s how they always are!” He dropped his hand and turned to look at his two teammates. “Are they really not like that on missions with you?”

“Not anymore,” Illuso said with a shrug. “At first a bit, but they’re pretty reliable now.”

“You’ve got to go slow with them. They’re easily set off, but if they know they can count on you they’re able to push through it,” Formaggio said.

“My stand is invincible and I never even let the guy near them. There’s no one better suited for watching someone’s blind spot than me,” Ghiaccio said with his hand splayed out on his chest.

“I mean, like… emotionally,” Formaggio said, scratching the back of his head. “If I was to put myself in their headspace I’d say they probably think you hate them.”

“I don’t hate them,” Ghiaccio spat loudly.

“Good! Now step two is letting them know that,” Illuso said, clapping a hand on Ghiaccio’s back, causing his glasses to slide down his nose.

Ghiaccio grumbled and pushed his glasses back up. He knew that things were weird between the two of you ever since your mission, but it never even crossed his mind it was because of something he said. Is this what Prosciutto felt like training Pesci? But even Pesci had never been avoidant or scared of Prosciutto for all the tough love that he gave him. Pesci looked up to him like an older brother.

If he was really the only one in all of La Squadra that you were uncomfortable around, then he supposed it was on him now to figure out why.

---

The base was pretty quiet today, with a lot of missions landing on Risotto’s desk this week. While you were quite fond of your new teammates you liked having the common area all to yourself on a quiet evening, especially if you were curled up with a novel. When you first started living at the base it felt like a luxury, but even after you had gotten used to the quiet its novelty hadn’t worn off for you.

The sound of a key jingling at the front door had you peeking over your book. When Ghiaccio appeared framed by the living room entrance you held your breath. Hopefully he’d be going upstairs… no, it looked like he was coming into the common area. That’s okay, you could move, so you started standing up, except… he was looking right at you, heading in your direction.

“Sit down,” he said stiffly, and after a beat he added, “Please?”

“Uhh! Okay!” you said, sitting back down and bringing your book right back up to cover your face.

“Can you also, uh. Please. Put the book down?” Ghiaccio said, his voice strained to maintain a monotone and flatten out any inflection. You did as he asked, although you still couldn’t meet his eyes, and he just stared at you awkwardly.

“Uh-”

“Hello,” he said, and it left his mouth at the exact same time your muttered exclamation had. Another awkward pause.

“Hi?” you said, unsure. This wasn’t what you were expecting from your next conversation with the man, for as long as you had postponed it. You thought he’d be demanding to know why you were ignoring him, or getting on your case about being too sensitive to handle his criticism on your last mission. Maybe that was yet to come?

“You are afraid of me,” Ghiaccio stated flatly. Then perhaps he realized he wanted to ask it as a question. “Yes?”

“Oh, no, I’m…” you muttered.

“Of course you are,” he said quickly, cutting you off before you could mumble out an excuse. You got pretty embarrassed by that, but you swallowed and moved your eyes up to gauge his expression. He didn’t look angry, but he looked hyper focused to the point of distress. His lips were pressed together tightly as if he was trying to hold back from speaking again.

“I’m sorry,” you said.

“For being scared of me?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. He was being sarcastic again, wasn’t he?

“No, I… I mean… I’m sorry for,” you started, trying to think of something legitimate to actually be sorry about. “For fucking up on the mission.”

“Did fucking up on the mission really bother you that much?” he said. Not only were you stupid for fucking up the mission, but you were also stupid for letting it bother you for so long! What did he want you to say?

“No, I mean…”

But Ghiaccio cut you off with a long loud exhale. “Look, I’m not great at this kind of thing. I understand that I make you anxious, and I understand that for whatever reason it’s hard for you to talk to me, but I really can’t understand what people say unless they drop all the bullshit.” When you frowned and looked away he tried again. “Not bullshit, fuck, uh. No, not fuck... It’s just that. I need you to say exactly what you mean. I can’t tell what people are thinking unless they make it… easy for me.”

You looked back at him. Whatever he was here to talk about with you, he was trying very hard not to raise his voice. The way he was talking to you was too stilted to be anything but intentional. If he was doing this for your sake, then you would try to meet him halfway. You took a moment to think, to choose what you wanted to say carefully.

“I don’t do well with loud noises. I also… take things very personally. I’ve been worrying that you…” You took another second before committing. “...Hate me.”

He pressed his lips in a thin line again as some noise tried to escape his throat, perhaps an instinctive denial. “What about me makes you think that?”

“Well… you seemed pretty disappointed in me after the mission.”

“I was checking in with you. I wanted to make sure Prosciutto was properly training you.”

You raised an eyebrow. “But… but you sounded really angry and sarcastic.”

Ghiaccio closed his eyes and thought about that for a second. “I probably was angry, but not at you. You just fucked up on something so basic that I had to wonder if Prosciutto was actually teaching you anything useful.”

“That’s… not how you said it though,” you said, feeling defensive. “I… I know I did something dumb… but I’ve never messed up with my stand like that before. It was different on that mission.”

“Me talking to myself?” Ghiaccio asked. He had been fixating over what he said to you at the end of that mission for days now, trying to remember all the details. He recalled how you had started with one explanation, but you quickly retracted it.

“You were… so angry the entire mission,” you complained. “Everyone else is quiet on missions with me because my stand is better suited to it.”

“It wasn’t a stealth mission,” Ghiaccio countered. “We were using your stand for something different. I wasn’t even talking to you.”

“I know!” you groaned. “You weren’t trying to distract me, but when things get too loud I…”

“But you took it back. You said it wasn’t me,” Ghiaccio said, leaning forward. His voice had risen just a little, but when he noticed how you reacted to that he tensed up.

“I took it back because I was afraid of upsetting you!” you said, leaning back into the couch as far as you could. “Because when I brought it up… you were mean about it… so I took it back! I thought you were trying to tell me it was my fault, so I took the blame like I thought you wanted!”

“I was… I was asking for clarification! If I did something that caused you to fuck up then I want to know that I did so we can talk about it!” He was clenching his fists to keep his upward inflections from becoming full-blown yelling.

“None of that came across!” you complained. “Like… maybe you technically said those things, but the way you said made it come across completely different!”

“What about you? Now you’re telling me that you meant something completely different from the things you actually said to me!?”

“I-I… but I was obviously upset! I was obviously just trying to appease you!”

“How was it obvious? I thought you were upset because you fucked up! No one likes fucking up!”

“Yeah, no kidding!” You realized at this point that your own voice was starting to rise, which was making Ghiaccio raise his to match yours, and you took a deep breath before speaking calmly again. “I was upset because I was afraid.”

It was quiet again for a little while until Ghiaccio broke the silence.

“Being mean and angry comes really easy to me,” he said, running his fingers through his curls. “Even when I don’t realize it, I still am. Even if I think I’m being reasonable, people misunderstand. I’ve been so used to the others actually being able to take it that I forgot how bad it was.” He scratched at his head a bit. “I also have a hard time telling how loud I actually am until someone points it out.”

You sat there for a moment, soaking that in, before you gave a small amused huff with a half-smile on your face. “I’m not great with loud noises because of what they mean to me. Gunshots remind me of a time when I wasn’t safe… but I can protect myself now, and I have other people who will protect me too. But yelling reminds me of… how I was never good enough for anyone.” You tapped your fingers on the cover of the book on your lap and shrugged.

“I hear from the others that you’re really skilled and reliable on missions,” Ghiaccio said. “I didn’t see that from you when we worked together, but maybe that’s because I was the one who fucked up.”

“But you didn’t...” you started.

“I fucked up by not meeting you where you were at. You’re new. I don’t know you, I don’t know what you’re like. If we had talked beforehand, if I had worked with you, then you probably wouldn’t have made that mistake. I was taking the lead on that mission, it was my job to train you to use your stand in an unfamiliar circumstance. I use missions to get out all the shit that makes me angry, since I don’t need to stay quiet. You don’t work like that. You had no idea what I was yelling for. I never told you how I do things, I just expected you to brush it off like everyone else does.”

You blinked a few times. You had been pretty quick to blame yourself for your own shortcomings, but hearing him say that really recontextualized that entire mission experience.  You might have fucked up, but it was now obvious that he did not hold it against you. “That’s surprisingly self-aware of you.”

He rolled his eyes and set his elbow on the couch’s armrest, plopping his head on his fist. “You don’t know me either. I’m more than a raving heartless bastard. Stuff like this… not understanding why other people think the way they do, or what I’m doing wrong… it really fucks me up. I don’t hate you. You’re a part of my family now and I genuinely want to help you get stronger. I’m sorry if I hurt you.”

Ghiaccio was nothing like you thought. He was actually really sensitive and introspective. You could tell it was hard for him to confront you like this, almost as hard as it was for you to be confronted. You appreciated that he wanted to put in the effort to have a relationship with you.

“Thank you Ghiaccio. And I’m sorry I avoided you instead of trying to talk about it like this.” You reached over and placed your hand on his shoulder with a gentle smile. He seemed taken aback by the contact, but he relaxed after a moment.

“Are we… good?” he huffed out.

“I think so!”

He let out one long exhale that seemed to go on forever. “Thank fuck,” he muttered, before turning to look at you. “Goddamn it, sorry.”

“It’s not the swearing that bothers me,” you clarified. “It’s the intention behind it. You’re… uh… fucking good, my dude.”

He let out a snort at the awkward way you said that before bringing his hand up to cover his face, looking away in embarrassment.

“Aw, no, that was cute,” you assured him, which only made it worse.

“Well, if we’re done here then I’m heading to bed,” he said, and you glanced at the clock in the living room. It had gotten pretty late. He stood up and started walking towards the stairs.

“We have a mission together again this weekend, right?” you asked, and he looked at you over his shoulder.

“Yeah,” he confirmed.

“I’m looking forward to it,” you said with as much enthusiasm as you could muster. And you meant it. “Goodnight!”

“...Night,” he said, before he disappeared around the corner.

[sweetlittlevampire]

Rima’s Wangxian Fic Rec

So I’ve compiled these specifically for @inessencedevided , but hey, we’re all here to spread the love, so please, share and reshare to your heart’s content! :D

I’ll start with “Personal Favourites” - there are many more that I would consider a Personal Favourite, but I’ve picked those specifically because I thought you’d enjoy them. AU fics will also be included, because there are some real gems out there, and some still take place in canon universe, but with a twist, so...yeah.

Main pairing is Wangxian; I somehow don’t tend to read much else. ^^;

This thing is going to be loooong, so please find everything under the Read More. And feel free to let me know if a link doesn’t work so I can fix it.

Personal Favourites

爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie

Rating: Explicit

Warning: Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Length:  68713 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: “Wei Wuxian has certainly hoped so ardently in his two lifetimes, for so many different things, in so many different ways, that he could have summoned the demon to his front door with his bare hands. His eyes wander to Lan Zhan, settle on the back of his head, the blue-black curtain of his hair. Oh, how he has hoped.”

A case fic! And one of my personal all-time favourites as well! It is so well-crafted, with an engaging and captivating plot, a TON of OCs who actually do contribute to the story, and a few scenes that are so beautiful I could weep. Got hyped up on twitter, and rightfully so. It’s a delight to read.

Rabbit Heart by  Suaine

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length:   56590 words in total

Chapters: 6

Status: Completed

Author’s summary: “ Wei Wuxian walks his lonely road, but he’s not going to leave Lan Wangji entirely alone. That would be boring. “

Another case fic! Set after the show’s ending, Wei Wuxian goes his way, but leaves the paper man behind to keep Lan Wangji company. I loved this one to pieces - it has intriguing subplots and will make your heart melt several times.

Those are actually thonly two case fics I’ve read so far, but for more, be sure to visit @wangxianfics ‘s Case Fic section. It has many more, and I am planning on reading several of them.

the earth remembered me by  remux

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:  30321  words so far

Chapters: 2 out of scheduled 4

Status: Ongoing

Author’s Summary: “All around him, summer throbs like a heartbeat, undeniably alive. Wounds begin to heal. And Wei Wuxian, with sweat on his brow, feels ripe. Wei Wuxian, with his hands deep in the soil and mud between his toes, remembers something simple and primitive and utterly transformative: It feels good to make things grow. OR: Wei Wuxian’s travel guide to finding your place in the world.”

This fic changed me. Like, literally. It’s still ongoing, but I don’t even care. It’s not a case fic, but I’m 100% sure you’ll love it. It’s pure poetry and catharsis, and it hurts so much, but it’s so necessary. I think I cried several times while reading each of the chapters, and I’m eagerly but patiently awaiting the next one. It follows Wei Wuxian’s journey after he leaves the Cloud Recesses in episode 50 and tells the story of what he does and experiences before he returns back to Lan Wangji. So it’s absically only Wei Wuxian, Lil’ Apple, and the people they meet along his way.

Begotten by  ecorie

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   37279  words

Chapters: 6

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “He’s mine.” He echoed what had once been teasingly said in jest, and added, “This is my son.” Against all odds and without a choice, Lan Zhan brings A-Yuan back to Cloud Recesses. Xichen keeps his brother’s secrets, and shields the child when Lan Zhan could not.“

Also known as: Filling in the blanks with everything that happened in those 13 years. I loved this one. Wangji = Best Dad, Sizhui = Best Son.

Canon Universe

(not necessarily canon compliant though)

the soft animal by  cafecliche

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   5046  words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “You don’t think that’s strange?” he says. His voice, his new voice, is familiar now. But sometimes it almost startles him, hearing it come from his mouth. “It’s been nine months. I’ve used them almost every day. I should know how long these legs are.” (Or: Wei Wuxian has a plan to train Mo Xuanyu’s body. The results aren’t quite what he expects.)“

A very interesting take on Wei Wuxian, and how he comes to terms with his new body. Something I had not seen previously explored, and I really loved how the author handled it.

Come let me love you (Come love me again) by  obsessivereader

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:  9105   words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “The notes from the dizi cut off as Wei Ying goes absolutely still. Over the quiet whisper of the wind through grass, Lan Wangji can hear the rapid beat of his own heart. Wei Ying's hands drop to his side slowly, so slowly, as though time has slowed down for both of them. He turns, a look almost of fear on his face. And then...And then, Wei Ying smiles—slow and beautiful and warm and relieved as though Lan Wangji standing before him is a treasured dream fulfilled. "Lan Zhan," he breathes.“

A “What happens after the end of the last episode?”-fic. I’m kind of a sucker for those. This one is very sweet and tender; I absolutely loved the interactions between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, and the gentleness of it all. I also adore the song it’s been titled after (”Annie’s Song” by John Denver, if you’re curious).

Death of a Ghost by  Gotcocomilk

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length:   107397 words in total

Chapters: 30

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “There was a ghost that haunted the decks of Lotus Pier, it was said. If you stepped across the wooden planks at night, walked along the endless docks and flying purple banners, he would appear. He was always in darkest black, dressed as specter and shadow. In the emptiness where a face should be was a thick fog, features washed away and leaving behind only glimmering red eyes. He looked ferocious as a ghoul, it was said. Jin Ling thought he looked sad.“

Full disclosure - I am five chapters into this thing, and I am already recommending it, I am that intrigued. There is some serious Yunmeng Bros stuff in there which I think you are going to love, and the interactions between said ghost and Jin Ling are - aaaah! Cannot wait to continue!

wrap your name tight around my ribs by  sasukepositive

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   8728 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ In true Wei Ying fashion, his return comes with a dose of mischief. “

Another “What happens after the end of the last episode?”-fic, with a good dose of Wangxian family feels. In fact. the whole thing is a huge chunk of feels. A very soft, delicate, and sweet fic, which will leave you feeling warm and fuzzy.

please linger by  sasukepositive

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   5636 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ When A-Yuan begins crying, Lan Wangji knows it makes sense. He understands that crying will not harm him — he logically knows that. However, A-Yuan’s little face turns red so quickly that it leaves Lan Wangji a little panicked.“Ah,” he begins helplessly, stepping forward in an attempt at — something. He doesn’t know what. “It’s okay.” or: sometimes the man you love assures you that his mysteriously acquired child will nap until he gets back from shopping. for sure. “

If you liked the Dad Date Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian had with A-Yuan in Yiling, then you’ll love this one. It’s a fill-the-gaps fic in which Lan Wangji returns to Yiling several times to see Wei Wuxian and A-Yuan. Still follows canon events though, hence the bittersweet ending, but it is still so so lovely.

I hope that you will come and meet me by  feyburner

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length:   28385 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “ The second time Lan Zhan said Wei Ying, come back, Wei Wuxian did. “

Another one of tehse post-show-canon fics. I love everything feyburner writes, and this was the first fic of theirs I came across. I love the feeloings described in it, and just how sweet it is. One of those fics in which the way the mature part is executed just makes the whole thing even sweeter.

Alternate Universe

(but sometimes within the canon universe?)

Merman Lan Wangji!AU by  FleetofShippyShips ( @fleetofshippyships here on tumblr)

- which is a series of connected fics, and not one long fic with chapters, hence why the formatting is different here. 5 entries so far; ungoing. Teen And Up Audiences

...which is definetely a personal favourite of mine, - you might have noticed, since I’ve been drawing a ton for this particular AU. But since I don’t know if yu’re into merfolk!AUs I didn’t list it up there with the personal favourites.

It is following canon so far, only that Lan Wangji is, as the title suggests, a merman - with secrets.

I adore the atmosphere of this series so much, and the way Zoe writes it is just so beautiful. It’s a story in which I could live, and if you’re in for the ride, I can assure you that there will be many surprises to come.

Welcome to Gusu  by  perkynurples ( @bilboo here on tumblr)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   30853 words so far

Chapters: 5 so far

Status: Ongoing

Author’s Summary: “ Deep in the lush forests of Gusu hides an aging resort that hosts dozens of children every summer for an unforgettable couple of weeks. It’s where Lan Wangji grew up alongside Wei Wuxian, and when his childhood friend (for the lack of a better term) surprisingly returns years later in the position of Senior Counsellor, seemingly hell bent on causing the same kind of mischief that got him kicked out of Gusu in the first place, but also taller, broader and tanner than ever before, Lan Wangji knows he’s In Trouble. Or, this fic has it all: longing looks over campfires, found family dynamics, ill-timed skinny dipping, teenagers inappropriately shipping their counsellors, LAKE MONSTERS “

Annie wasn’t lying when she said this fic has it all. What started as some kind of crack fic turned into something beautiful that completely owns my heart.  The interactions between the characters are so heartwarming, and while I sense that some major drama is going to occur soon, I also know that this will eventually have a happy ending. It’s delightful, and it does belong to my personal favourites as well.

Some of You by  tangerinechar

Rating: Mature

Warning: N/A

Length:   60640 words

Chapters: 7

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji gets drunk and tweets a love confession, Wei Wuxian panics, and all of twitter decides to matchmake Lan Wangji and his mystery guy. “

A social media fic! And a hilarious one at that! If you’re in the mood for an extra panicky, extra obnoxious Wei Wuxian? This is the fic for you. It has one of the sweetest love confessions ever. There’s some background Xicheng too.

Window Shopping by  thunderwear

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length:   18000 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji didn't look out across the other apartment building often, but now, as he scooped up his escaped rabbit, he looked over only to see a piece of paper taped to the window of the apartment across from him. It was written on purple construction paper in big block letters, like a child had written it. WHAT'S YOUR BUNNY'S NAME???“

I did already rec this one to you, but WHO CARES? A Quarantine fic! The first one I came across, and I loved it! A friend of mine thought Wei Wuxian was OOC, but I disagree - he didn’t exactly grow up in the same circumstances as in canon, and his life situation isn’t 100% the same, so I still think it fits. A-Yuan makes an appearance, and the interactions between Lan Wangji, Wei Wuxian, and the boy are just so very cute!

Home is Where the Heart is by  Alipeeps ( @alipeeps here on tumblr)

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:  10036 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Wei Ying’s expression is tight and unhappy, his entire body held rigidly away from Lan Zhan.He doesn’t look at Lan Zhan as he says, “You don’t have to worry, Lan Zhan, I’m never going to touch you.”The distaste in Wei Ying’s voice makes Lan Zhan’s blood run cold.“Just because our families have arranged this marriage, we don’t have to be together… like that…” Wei Ying’s mouth twists unpleasantly. “It can be a marriage in name only. A...” he swallows, looking like he might be sick, “...a business arrangement.”

Arranged Marriage AUs are also one of my weaknesses, especially if the two soon-to-be-married people are actually in love with each other but have yet to confess, This one does the trick. It’s modern era with no cultivation, and the mutual pining is REAL in this one.

what else is there? by  mme_anxious

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:   12917 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Did you hear the terrible news? Yiling Laozu Wei Wuxian has gone beyond the pale! He has murdered Hanguang-Jun!”This is the first thing the swan hears flying over Yiling, and it sets him to hissing. It’s the kind of sound he would never make as a human, but as a swan—a mute swan— hissing is the only form of communication available to Lan Wangji. So he hisses. -Jin Guangyao transforms Lan Wangji into a swan. Only an act of love will break the curse.”

A fairytale!AU based on Swan Lake. You might have seen my Swangji drawing; this is the fic it was drawn for. It takes place in canon universe and is super lovely and magical. I may have cried a bit.

all your life you’ll dream of this by  Attila ( @attilarrific here on tumblr)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warning: N/A

Length:  22668 words

Chapters: 1

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: “Lan Wangji should refuse. He should. He looks back down at the mask. Beneath it is the soft creamy paper of the invitation. He could present this at the door and slip into the palace and—“Go see him, Wangji,” Lan Xichen says quietly, and Lan Wangji feels his resolve crumble beneath him”

Another fairytale!AU - this time, it’s loosely based on Cinderella, with Lan Wangji as Cinderella and the forehead ribbon as glass slipper. Such a lovely lovely fic. May also have cried a bit; it’s heartfelt and magical and so warm and sweet.

Love wakes me by  dea_liberty

Rating: Explicit

Warning: N/A

Length:   42812 words in total

Chapters: 4

Status: Completed

Author’s Summary: "It starts with a bet. All mistakes, Wei Wuxian thinks, start with a bet. It’s starts with a bet and ends with Wei Wuxian losing everything. Nine years ago, Wei Wuxian made a bet with disastrous consequences. Now, he is part-owner of the popular and eclectic Yiling Cafe, years and miles away from his old life, making the best of things and trying to leave the past where it belongs. When Lan Wangji walks into his cafe by accident, Wei Wuxian finds himself doing what he thought he'd never do again; reclaiming some small part of his past, and hoping for a future he'd given up as lost.”

If someone had told me that I would fall head over heels in love with a Coffee Shop AU, of all things? I would have laughed...yet here we are. I’ve read this thing in one sitting and cannot stop thinking about it. I absolutely have to reread it; it’s slowly but surely becoming one of my personal favourites.

[aire101]

Ferrum Intro

My brain absolutely, positively refuses to focus on romance atm, which means I have made no progress on my WIP and instead my brain ended up producing this concept which I will probably continue at least until I get it out of my system.  So here’s the beginning of a post-Endgame MCU/SAO Irondad fic that I went online to read, discovered it didn’t exist yet, and so could NOT GET OUT OF MY DAMN HEAD.

-------

It had been a long day.

Then again, every day seemed like a long one lately.

It had been a relatively beautiful November day for New York City, and with the approaching holidays Peter was starting to see the usual uptick in petty crime begin this season. Within his five hour patrol he had helped eight lost tourists, found one lost pet, caught two armed burglars and tied up a ridiculous number of petty thieves. Nothing too problematic, just another day in the life of our friendly neighborhood Spider-man.

Peter sat crouched on a roof looking over the newest Iron Man mural to pop up, this time right on the edge between Queens and Brooklyn. There were several around town already, but this one was especially heart-wrenching. Most were either of the armor mid-action or of Mr. Stark in his trademark press look. But this one was different in the best and worst way.

In this art, Mr. Stark was still in his armor, but the helmet was retracted, allowing the viewer to see the blood crusted on his face, the lines of worry even deeper than they were before everything had gone to hell. There weren’t many pictures of Mr. Stark from the five year period now known as the Blip, but in the ones there were Peter knew he had looked like this— tired and worn in a way Peter had never seen, but could well understand. All in all, it looked uncannily similar to the last time Peter had seen him. When—

Anyway—

And on the shoulders of this mural’s Tony Stark rested an enormous orb holding dozens of galaxies spiraling around a central point— a tiny arc reactor in the shape of a heart.

There was still a little while before he would be expected at Ned’s tonight, but the more he tried to convince himself to hit the streets again, the heavier his limbs felt.

He couldn’t do it. Not like this. Experience told him it was a recipe for disaster, likely to get himself or someone else badly hurt. Himself he could handle, someone else… his conscience couldn’t take another body added to its count right now. Besides, he had promised Ned he’d be there tonight.

Peter sighed and swung away from his rooftop perch to head back towards Ned’s, not sparing the art a backwards glance.

No matter how good it was, no reproduction could ever duplicate what he had lost.

----------

“Whoa, you’re early,” said Ned with a mild tone of shock. Which honestly… was probably fair. “I wasn’t expecting you for at least another thirty minutes.”

“Yeah, I decided to call it a night early. It was actually pretty quiet tonight anyway. Didn’t want to get too wrung out on the web considering we have plans tonight,” said Peter as he stepped into the Leeds’ apartment, slipping off his shoes and hanging his coat on the rack. “Where is everyone?”

“Dad has to work tonight, and mom and Angelica went to Laser Bounce earlier, but they should be back before too long. I stayed home to finish some stuff up before the launch tonight. Plus, I wasn’t sure when you’d be getting here, so…”

“Sorry, I should have messaged earlier.”

“You’re alright man. Like I said, I had some stuff to wrap up. I plan to be in-game as much as possible tomorrow,” said Ned as they moved into his bedroom.

“You sure you don’t mind me getting the first run tonight? They might have some secret opening event planned for the first few hours…” asked Peter.

“I am absolutely positive. I am going to have plenty of opportunities to lose unhealthy amounts of sleep to this game. Besides, between the two of us I think you need the break more than me.  On a related note— you look terrible man. Have you been sleeping at all?”

“I sleep,” said Peter defensively. “I don’t really need much though, you know?”

“Physically, sure. Mentally? You’re still just as human as the rest of us Peter. Have you talked to May about it? Or Happy?”

“Can we please drop this? It’s just been a long day, alright?”

“What happened? I thought you said it was mostly quiet?” asked Ned, confused.

“I meant it was quiet for New York, I was still busy pretty much all evening,” said Peter, falling backwards onto Ned’s bed.

Ned sat down at his computer, spinning around to face Peter. “Fine, but I’m definitely going to harass you later, and you better actually sleep after we trade off in a few hours. Anyway, I am SO PSYCHED or this! God I hope its worth all the hype.”

“I can’t imagine it being a flop. The tech behind it is revolutionary, and the head developer has been working on the game for like a decade,” said Peter, as he scrolled through the GameSpot special coverage from that day.

“Wasn’t SI contracted to consult on it, too?” asked Ned.

Peter felt his throat begin to constrict. The nails of his right hand bit into the flesh of his palm as he forced himself to take a slow breath—hold—and release…

“Yeah, Mr. Stark consulted on it himself. Some of the engineering on the headset is similar to the BARF technology. I think he might have worked on a couple system AI’s as well.”

“That is so cool man. So this is almost like his last tech contribution? Last gift to the world…”

“I doubt that. It was just a consult job, most of the work was done by Argus. Plus, Mr. Stark had years worth of projects and updates on file. We’ll probably see things he had a hand in being released for the next ten years at the least,” said Peter.

“Still pretty cool though,” said Ned with a shrug.

At that moment, Peter heard the sound of a key being inserted into the lock of the front door.

“Looks like they’re back,” he said, continuing to scroll, this time through discussions on Reddit.

“Have you had dinner yet? You know if you haven’t she’s going to force you to eat before you dive.”

“Nah, I didn’t get a chance to stop off earlier. What kind of leftovers do ya have?”

“I think there’s meatloaf and some chicken adobo left at the moment.”

“Yaaasss… Chicken adobo…”

Just then Ned’s bedroom door opened, and Mrs. Leeds poked her head in, a large smile on her face.

“Peter! I thought I saw your coat by the door! I’m glad you were able to make it tonight! Edward has been excited about the sleepover for weeks,” she said.

“Oh my god, mom! It’s not a sleepover! I doubt we’ll even sleep much!”

“Isn’t that what sleepovers are about?! You’re ridiculous… Anyway, have you eaten?” Mrs. Leeds asked, looking at Peter.

Peter had to bite back a smile, but shook his head.

“Hala ka, you’re going to waste away into dry bones! I don’t care how busy you are these days, you shouldn’t be skipping meals. You’ll blow away in a strong breeze. Come, I’ll heat something up. I know how bad you boys get about eating when its a normal game. A full immersion VR? You’ll forget you even have a real body that needs sustenance.”

“Yes, ma’am,” said Peter, dutifully following her into the kitchen.

“You are in luck. We have some leftover chicken adobo from last night. I know you like that recipe. Did May ever give it a go?”

Peter flashed back to the gloopy, slightly charred mess that was May’s attempt at cooking the dish. “Eh… Yeah but it wasn’t quite the same. Still needs a bit of work.”

“Huh,” Mrs. Leeds said, sounding confused.

“Peter!” shouted a voice from behind him.

“Hey Angie,” said Peter, before he felt arms wrap around him from behind in a bear hug.

His heart throbbed in his chest. His breath caught and wouldn’t come.

Thanos was coming for the gauntlet he couldn’t let him have it he had to run the aliens were grabbing him he had to—

“You never come around anymore! It’s been months—!”

“Stop that Angelica. It’s been a crazy year, and Peter stays very busy between school and an internship. Shouldn’t you be getting ready for bed? It’s already way passed bedtime.”

Angie rolled her eyes dramatically but stomped back off towards her room to do as she was asked.

“Sorry, dear. She just missed her big brothers, you know.”

Peter did his best to force out a grin, but he wasn’t sure just how well it came off because the next thing he knew Mrs. Leeds was giving him a tender kiss on the head and muttering about making some cups of cocoa.

It was moments like this that he truly felt the strange reality of the fact that he had lost five years of his life. On the surface level everything felt mostly the same— Aunt May along with the majority of his friends had also been snapped, as well as several of his teachers. But while they were gone, Ned’s little sister aged from an innocent five year old, to a ten year old girl who had grown in a world in more confusion, pain and desperation than Peter could really comprehend. Freshman he had helped tutor in school had graduated. Families he had known were irreparably torn apart, seemingly overnight.

It felt like while he was still the same, the rest of the world had tilted slight to the left, leaving him unbalanced and unsure where to step next. He’d always felt a bit out of place anyway after the spider bite, but now it was so much worse. Sometimes Peter wanted a taste of what normal used to be like, without freaky spider powers, world protecting responsibilities and the guilt of looking around him and wondering if he deserved to be here at all.

He glanced at the clock that hung on the wall— fifteen minutes till midnight.

“I should probably go brush my teeth too and get settled in. The server will open soon,” said Peter as he stood.

“Yeah, though there shouldn’t really be much to do other than to actually connect since we calibrated your account the other day,” said Ned.

Within ten minutes Peter had taken care of his nightly necessities and given Angie and Mrs. Leeds both a hug goodnight, settling in on the upper bunk of Ned’s bed.

“Last time I’m asking— are you sure you don’t mind me giving this the first run?” asked Peter.

Ned sighed and spun around from his computer to send Peter an exasperated look. “Do you not want to take it on its maiden voyage?”

“That’s not what I said,” Peter rolled his eyes.

“Then stop worrying.  Just have a good time for once.  Also, I downloaded a couple files to the gear.  Not sure how reliable it is yet, but a few beta testers put out some first floor tips on the DL as a downloadable in game file, so check that out once you dive.  It might help out a bit.”

“Will do.  Thanks.”

“No problem.  Now get going, and be sure to take plenty of notes in your journal to send me later.”

“See you around, kid.”

“I am older than you are by two months.  Shut up and dive, loser.”

Peter smiled as he fitted the Nervegear onto his head, laid back and said, “Link Start.”

———————

In a remote, nondescript server room a certain file kicked to life.  It’s programming had been remotely accessed, a mere accident of oversight.  The digital pathways that connected it to the Argus servers, while known about, had been forgotten in the chaos of the last few years.  The file was not one created within the system, but one created to interact within it.  The Cardinal system downloaded the precious data, implementing it in the category that best described its form and function.

Program designation: Client

System ID: Ferrum Vir

Administration level: GM

. . . .

Installation Complete

————————

At 12:00 am EST on November 5th, 2023 (1:00 pm JST), Peter Parker joined 10,000 others in the world’s first full dive MMORPG— Sword Art Online.

And so did a very confused Anthony Edward Stark.

[artigas]

Hi! Firstly I just want to say I've been following you for about 6 months and you do a really good job curating your blog, it's so beautiful! Secondly, thanks for getting me into Black Sails and the gay hell that it is :) and thirdly, do have any good book recs about starting to write/writing in general? or any advice about practicing writing?

Thank you so much!! I’m really glad you enjoy my blog and I’m so excited you got into Black Sails. It’s a wonderful show that never got enough hype, imo, for doing exactly what fans have wanted out of their other cult classics faves. Queer rep, strong women, expert writing ... it’s a lot. Now’s a good time to tell you, if you didn’t know already, that my friends @crucifythenburn and @old-long-john also run a Black Sails podcast!! You can information on that right here: @hoist-the-colours-podcast. 

As far as writing tips go, I have to admit I feel like the only hypocrite getting into it. My own writing life has been in a real rut and I deffo don’t feel like the most capable, but my own negative feelings aside ... the first thing to say is I do, in fact, have a writing tips tag. It’s full of quotes and articles I’ve found useful in the past. As far as book recommendations go, I don’t have much- all my books about the actual mechanics of writing are about scholarly writing, literary lenses, all that. I would say, however, that I have casually read through both Neil Gaiman’s View From the Cheap Seats and Stephen King’s On Writing and both really inspired me when I was feeling low. The former isn’t entirely about writing, but Gaiman gets into the necessity of stories multiple times and it leaves me motivated and eager to do the work. 

I really believe that if you want to write well, you have to read a lot. Return to the books and stories you love. If you find yourself reading a lot of fic, exchange that for the odd book once in a while, just to expose you to something outside of the conventions you’re used to (the same goes the other way around). If you find a book you hate, be mindful of why you hate it- what about the writing style annoys you? What tropes and writing choices do you dislike as an audience member? 

Remember to embrace the things you love. I think a terrible thing about advice circles is you can sometimes find yourself in a sound chamber where adjectives are always bad, you should always just use the word ‘said’, this trope is stupid, that sort of story is a Bad Story, etc etc. Observe what people say, apply what feels right, test different approaches, but never forget that advice is meant to help you, not rule you. You’re allowed to love flowery writing. You’re allowed to work off tropes. You can be playfully predictable from time to time. Especially if you’re writing fanfiction, I think you’re writing primarily for yourself. You’re creating a work of love. Make sure you love the story you’re writing. Try to believe in it. Try to remember that while there’s nothing new under the sun, really, and someone else may have written something similar to you before, your unique and individual voice will resound in someone in a way that is absolutely not interchangeable. Only you can sound like you. Embrace that. The right people will love it. 

If you can, try to make a routine of writing small things, if you really want to make writing an active, living craft. There are books full of writing prompts, like 642 Things to Write About and when I was in my best state, I’d write a little every day- on my phone, on napkins, whatever, and sometimes turn to the prompts just to see if anything sparked something in me. Embrace the work that doesn’t make it. Keep lines that make you proud. Collect quotes from the work you love and fall back to beloved stories when you’re stuck. Sometimes, I need to be exposed to good writing so I can get my own wheels turning. When you’re feeling stuck, try listening to writers you love talk about writing as craft- again, I love to fall back on Neil Gaiman. Even just hearing him talk about writing or read his own work makes me Feel Something. Remember that it’s okay to have unproductive days. 

In situations when I just can’t get anything down on paper, where nothing feels or sounds right, or when I look at my own writing with harsh criticism, I try to think about other crafts. Don’t musicians do countless warms ups before they can be expert players? Don’t all orchestras tune first, test their instruments first, before playing a jaw-dropping performance? Doesn’t every sketch an artist completes contribute to their skill, even if each sketch isn’t a masterpiece? Think of your work like drops of water in a glass. No drop is ever pointless. No drop is ever wasted. They all contribute to that one wonderful day in the future when you look at your cup and realize with proud and grateful delight that it’s just about full. 

Good luck with your writing! Tell me if you find any good resources and I’ll make sure to keep an eye out for good book recommendations, too!! Thanks again for the sweet message

[misakishishido]

A Christmas Bound by Fate? [Jurina ver.] (JuriSaku OS)

Phew finally something new from me huh? Had time to write (AT LAST) thanks to the holiday season and also because I wanted to make a contribution for this unlikely ship I have been on for a while now, so please feel free to read especially if you like JuriSaku ;)

P.S. I actually do have a Sakura version for this fic planned since, not really a spoiler but, this fic is based on Jurina’s PoV. I’d love to know if you all, after reading the fic, would like to see a Sakura version of it which would cover everything that happens on her side of the world ;)

P.S.S. Huge shoutout to my best friend for assisting me with a certain part in this fanfiction x’D

Enjoy! Merry Christmas and a happy new year to you all!

“J-Jurina-san…!”

I turned around to look at the person who was an arm’s length away from me. Weird… her whole head was completely covered by a layer of darkness that I rubbed my eyes a number of times but still couldn’t make out who it was. She was about my height… in a elegant-looking beige-coloured winter coat.

Her voice sounded familiar though but…

“Yes?” I coolly said, though I honestly wanted to blurt out a question, asking who the heck this person was before me.

“I-I… I’ve got a present for you!”

She said as she leapt towards me, crashing into me and I lost my balance, slowly falling to the cold hard surface beneath me, unable to catch a glimpse of who she was, even though the mist of darkness faded away in a brief instance…….

-x-x-x-x-x-

“OUCH!!!!!!”

It seems that I had woken up with my face face flat on the carpeted floor of my hotel room. So that was all just a dream? Gosh… I don’t even know if I should label it as a good dream or a nightmare. As I was still dazed on the floor, my phone started ringing and I quickly picked it up, not even checking who the caller was.

“J-san!”

Slightly ticked off by such a loud voice in the morning, I tried to keep my cool and greeted back without much expression, “Ah… Makiko. Morning,” I shrugged, briefly yawning right after, “And seriously… don’t call me that.”

“Ehehe~. Sorry sorry. I’ve got a favour to ask of you, mind hearing me out?”

“Hmm? You don’t always ask me for favours, SKE’s magni~fi~cent leader-san. This must be some kind of dangerous task huh?”

“Wow Jurina-san, thanks for the sarcasm,” I could imagine her pouting right about now, “I need you to attend an emergency meeting at the HKT48 theatre. You’re in Fukuoka right now for some kind of CM shoot right?”

“Well yeah I am but… that’s really sudden,” I massaged the back of my neck gently before getting up from the floor to switch on the lights, “What, you’re unable to come over?”

“Uh huh. The manager made a mistake and double-booked me so I kinda need to handle some important stuff in Nagoya. So please, can you go on my behalf? I don’t think any other SKE member is there right now except for you.”

I looked at the time on the digital clock on my bedside table and smiled, “Yeah you’re in luck. I don’t have much going on today anyways other than the shoot. What time’s the meeting?”

And so, I went to the meeting that was taking place at the HKT48’s theatre in Makiko’s stead. 

Unbeknownst to me,  I was probably the only person who was acting as substitute for our group’s leader, or captain, as the other groups call theirs. Every group had at least their co-captain here, with Yuihan representing AKB48, Sayanee representing NMB48, Miyawaki Sakura-chan representing HKT48, KitaRie-san representing NGT48 and lastly, Nana-chan representing STU48. Every one of them greeted me as I stepped into the room, looking confused as it seemed like the meeting had gone on for a while now. I apologised on that assumption.

“No need to apologise, Jurina-san! Makki sent me a message telling me she probably briefed you wrongly so I’m still glad you could make it!” Yuihan commented with excitement, mitigating my building frustration towards Makiko, “Ah but before you take a seat,” Yuihan stopped me as I was about to sit down, “Please take this.”

I quickly went over to Yuihan’s side and received a small parcel, “Umm… uh… what’s this?”

“We’re apparently playing Secret Santa, Jurina-san,” Sayanee, who had her chin resting on the palm of her hand facing our direction, said with a nonchalant tone of voice.

“Secret… Santa…?”

“First of all, go take a seat, I’ll just redo the whole brief once again!” Yuihan said with much enthusiasm, causing some to groan and some “not again”s to resound throughout the room.

“Aww come on, is it really that much of a chore girls?” Our energetic Soukantoku pouted.

“No no… it’s just that, what if some girls aren’t cooperative and don’t join the fun as you think they will, Yokayama-san?” Nana-chan voiced her concern.

Yuihan pondered for a bit before grinning in response, “We’ll cross that bridge when we get there!”

“Seriously Yokoyama-san…?” Sakura-chan, who was sitting directly opposite of me, let out a deep sigh.

“That’s the Yui I’ve known for a while now,” KitaRie-san said with a pleasant smile forming on her lips.

“A-ny-ways. The rundown is this Jurina-san,” she looked straight at me as chipper as ever, “In that small parcel of yours are envelopes of every member in SKE48 and in them, are names of members from……… I think it was HKT48? In them,” I could see Sakura-chan’s eyes light up as I briefly glanced at her.

Yuihan, now looking at the whiteboard that was scribbled with words behind her as she, continued to explain as I curiously tried to pry open the box without anyone noticing, “I would just like you to give those letters out to every SKE member in there that has been labelled by Teams for your convenience and have them complete the task by Christmas Day. So, how this basically works is………….”

Yes! Got the box opened up. I quickly looked at everyone who was either paying attention to Yuihan or fiddling with their phones and found a few mini sacks that, as Yuihan said, contained envelopes compiled by Teams. Went straight to Team S’ sack and quickly tried to dig out mine as Yuihan continued her lengthy explanation and when I found it, I swiftly tore open the flap of the envelope which housed a piece of yellow-coloured origami paper to reveal a name I never expected to see.

Mi-ya-wa-ki Sa-ku-ra.

Written in Hiragana instead of the usual Kanji.

…

……

Isn’t… she…

I gazed at Sakura-chan who probably felt the intensity of my gaze as she looked back at me too, giving me an awkward smile as I felt my ears feeling hotter and blood rushing towards my cheeks…

……

…

Eh?

“J-JURINA-SAN!!!!!!!!” Yuihan’s loud exclamation broke me out of my brief reverie, “W-WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!”

Ah crap. I got caught.

“U-Uh… N-Nothing!!!” I hurriedly dumped my envelope, along with the paper, back into the box and closed the flaps of the box, trying to act like nothing happened, “I-It… The box was sorta just opened up so–”

“As if it was!” Yuihan argued back before sighing, “You’re SUPPOSED to open it up when you get back home! Didn’t I JUST say that?!”

“U-Uh…” Nope I didn’t hear much of what she said to be honest, “Y-Yeah…… s-sorry… was just too curious since uh… since…” I just need to tug on Yuihan’s heartstrings to stop her from fuming, “… I’m… really hyped to play this! Secret Santa is really going to be fun and everyone is going to know each other from different groups in no time! Heck, new bonds will be formed so thank you for the amazing idea, Yui-sou-kan-to-ku~~!”

“Aww shucks~~~” Yuihan responded giddily, “You’re most welcome, Jurina-san~”

“So you’re gonna just give in huh, gullible idiot,” Sayanee deadpanned as everyone else giggled.

Yuihan cleared her throat shortly after, “So anyways! That’s that! Have fun y’all and Merry Christmas! Please ensure everyone cooperates so as to prevent the experience from being ruined yeah?”

“Understood!” We all said in unison and the meeting was dismissed.

-x-x-x-x-x-

I let out a deep sigh as I looked at the small parcel in my hands.

So I got Sakura-chan huh?

No actually, that isn’t really the point. Why the heck did I get all flustered like that in the meeting room? That was extremely uncool of me!

“Jurina-san?”

“Huh?” I looked over my shoulder to see Sakura-chan quietly stepping over to my side, with her eyebrows furrowed.

“Are you alright? I mean… just now–”

“Y-Yeah. I’m totally fine,” I sharply stopped Sakura-chan from continuing any talks about just now. I don’t really wanna remember how stupid I looked just now, nor do I want to remember being ‘scolded’ by Yuihan and getting out of it with sweet talk.

“Umm… okay,” Sakura-chan stepped back a little before looking towards the empty parking lot, where we were both waiting for our transports, “I actually just wanted to tell you that we got SKE48 members for our lots.”

My heart skipped a beat at that moment.

Odd.

“O-Oh? Really? That’s cool, looks like my group and yours will be exchanging presents huh.”

“Mm… That’s right.”

…

……

The awkward silence continued till a car appeared from the entrance of the parking lot, making two toots with Sakura-chan waving cheerfully.

“It’s nice to see you today, Jurina-san,” she turned back to me with a smile and bowed briefly, “Take care, and good luck with work the rest of the day!”

My heart skipped a beat once again.

I know Miyawaki Sakura-chan was a cute girl but… was she this cute?

“Juri–”

“U-Uh yeah! Likewise… Sakura-chan,” she went towards the car and as the driver opened the door for her, I had to go blurt out something embarrassing.

“I-It would…”

Sakura-chan halted her steps into the car, looking at me in confusion, “Hmm…?”

“I-It would be funny if we got each other by fate, right…?”

Sakura seemed like she was taken by surprise for a moment before breaking into a giggle, “Yes. I think so too, Jurina-san. Let’s see how fate plays out!”

She waved at me again before entering the car and I stood where I was, dumbfounded as I see Sakura-chan off.

My heart just won’t stop beating erratically. My cheeks feel hot.

What the heck is wrong with me? Am I sick or something?

I shook my head as my ride came a few minutes after sending Sakura-chan off.

—

Miyawaki Sakura.

A name I just cannot avoid for a while now.

I wonder when I started noticing her presence more and more? Around the time she WCentered Kibouteki Refrain with Mayu-san? When she was made Center for Kimi wa Melody and I heard on and off all the negative comments about her being made Center for such an important AKB single? Or was it when she was co-starring with me for various dramas, especially Tofu Pro Wrestling?

I just don’t know.

I remember feeling sympathy and understanding of what she went through when she was made Center for Kimi wa Melody especially when I was in the exact same position during the time I first started and got made center for Oogoe Diamond beside Maeda Atsuko-san…

I remember noticing how she was almost always at the position right beside me for various songs and even had to do parts with me for MVs too… Then the dramas made it so that we would have some kind of rivalry going on and that kind of escalated into us being the potential Acchan-san/Yuko-san, Sasshi-san/Mayu-san duo for the Sousenkyou.

It did make me go “why” at one point but it’s definitely not that she was unpleasant, it just made me think of Rena-chan from time to time, someone who I will forever think of the only person who can be by my side as both a rival and a precious comrade.

But now, that position, when I’m doing work in AKB48, is filled with Sakura-chan… and I just can’t avoid this reality. We barely talk in reality, nor do we do anything outside of work. She thinks of me as a rival and I honestly try not to do the same. So why?

Why does she make my heart pound with excitement?

Hmm…

Do I like her or something? As much as I like, no, love Rena-chan?

I mean… only Rena-chan, and at one point when I was younger, Mayu-san, were able to make me feel this way…

…

My heart probably wants its void caused by Rena-chan to be filled, that’s why it reacts to Sakura-chan, who has conveniently been by my side for various ocassions. Yes. That’s definitely why. Mmhmm~.

Problem solved! It’s definitely not because of true love or anything. Because I will always have feelings for Re–

*riiiiiing*

Huh? A phone call through the hotel phone?

“Hello…?”

“Hello Jurina-san! It’s me, Miyawaki Sakura.”

Yeah~ no. Problem NOT solved. Calm down, this stupid heart of mine!

“S-Sa-Sakura-chan?!”

“U-Uh… yes. I’m sorry, am I disturbing you?”

“No no you’re not! What’s up???”

“Umm… I kind of want to see you for a bit. Is it okay if you come down to the lobby?”

“O-Oh yeah sure! Or you can come up to my room if you’d like…”

WHAT THE HECK DID I JUST–

“Oh no no, it’s totally fine! I don’t want to intrude, plus our ride is kind of waiting for us right now so…”

“Our… ride?”

“Mm,” Sakura-chan affirmed, “Anyways, please get ready and come downstairs when you’re done, okay? See you in a bit!”

And with that, she hung up in a hurry.

What’s going on?

-x-x-x-x-x-

Upon arriving at the lobby, I see Sakura-chan pacing around the entrance of the hotel, looking rather fidgety. I called out to her and see her jump a bit as she turned to me, greeting me very formally.

“So uh… what’s up?”

She took out a folded piece of paper from her jacket’s pocket and handed it to me, “Sorry I had to fold it, but that’s the brief of the evening project we’re going to do now.”

“Huh?” I unfolded it and almost gasped at its contents, “… C-Christmas…. Date… Commercial……?!”

Sakura-chan scratched her cheek lightly, smiling shyly, “Mm. They have a costume in the van ready for both you and me and we’re doing a really short drama which leads into the advertisement you should have done today after the meeting.”

Are. You. Kidding. Me.

Again?!

What did I JUST think to myself a couple of minutes in my hotel room about us doing various things together in the group though we barely KNOW each other personally?

“I… see.”

“So let’s get going…?”

“Ahahaha…. Y-yeah… let’s.”

—

The short drama basically has both Sakura-chan and I playing as a couple, where I play as the guy and her as the girl. Apparently the whole drama is supposed to be funny and nonsensical while leading into the advert part of it. I’m not a fan of the awkward script however thank goodness the costume given to me seemed like something I’d wear since it was rather boyish, but had that cool flair to it that even girls could sport, along with a fedora. Sakura-chan had an elegant one piece under her long pinkish fur coat which seemed warm enough since we’d be on site for quite a while until the director gets the shots he wants.

Ain’t this a recipe for disaster for my poor confused heart?

Then again this is work. And as a professional, I shouldn’t allow anything personal deter my acting skills so let’s do this–!

“Jurina-san, let’s do our best!” Sakura-chan flashed a smile at me, with a pumped-up gesture that made me think of how adorable she was once again and I responded the same, leaving whatever facial expression I had to whatever acting skills I had in me on auto-pilot.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Sakura-chan twirled around in front of me, happily giggling as I slowly walked towards her with downcast eyes.

She noticed my behaviour and twirled towards me and I smoothly caught her by the waist as she placed both hands on my chest, her eyes gazing straight into mine with a frown.

“What’s wrong?”

I looked away abruptly, “It’s nothing.”

She laid her head on my chest, presumably smiling from her tone of voice, “It’s Christmas time, you should not have a heavy heart,” after she ended her sentence she lightly pushed me and twirled away from me before suddenly a number of extras came from the side started dancing with Sakura-chan singing and dancing bubbly to a Christmas jingle that had rewritten lyrics for the product we were advertising while I stood there as scripted.

Though at the same time, I was in awe at how beautiful she was as the spotlight was on her. And though this whole commercial was pretty lame, it just brought out how charming Sakura-chan was. I probably didn’t even need me in the first place.

Once the jingle ended, Sakura-chan took a short breather before approaching me again, with the brightest smile I’ve seen on a person and asked, “Did that make you happy?”

I nodded as I reached into my pocket to grab said product we were advertising for, shyly.

“As thanks… there’s something I want… to give you.”

“Mmm…?”

I lowered my fedora so as to cover my eyes and looked away from her, reaching out to her with the product in my hand, “M-Merry… Christmas.”

I placed the product on her opened, warm palms and when I let it go, she yelped as scripted and swiftly let go of the product which fell onto the ground.

“Kyaa!” She looked at it, “A-A hedgehog…?!”

(A/N: For visual aid purposes - http://www.nhmshop.co.uk/christmas-dec-bristle-animal-7cm-6-asstd.html )

I grunted as scripted and picked the product, which was a hedgehog Christmas decoration, up, looking at Sakura-chan in frustration, “Why did you drop my gift for you like that?!”

Sakura-chan looked at me with (fake) teary eyes after I shouted at her, “I-I’m really sorry but you startled me with such… such a prickly but cute decoration…!”

That thing sure, it’s cute but… Sakura-chan… is probably ten times cuter than that thing!

In one swift motion, again, as scripted, I swept Sakura-chan off her feet and she circled her arms around my neck as I used my other hand that had the hedgehog to make it peck her lips, with a smirk.

“Sorry for shouting at you like that…” I said in a low voice, “I thought you dropped it on purpose. I’m giving it to you because it reminded me of your cuteness.”

“Darling……” She grabbed my fedora and slowly pulled it off to the side as we closed the distance between our faces and held our breath till the director thankfully said “CUT!” in time before we could literally kiss each other.

Both Sakura-chan and I were extremely flustered after that last scene as she suddenly just couldn’t look at me in the eyes and we had to take a minute off before shooting the last scene where we just went over the other cute Christmas decorations available other than the hedgehog decor.

Everything was settled in one take so it didn’t take long till we were thanked by all of the staff members and we went into our van which took us back to where we lived. The driver decided to drop Sakura-chan off first as her home was the closest en route to the hotel I lived in.

Funny thing is that though it was our usual nine-seater van, I had the ‘smartest’ idea to instinctively sit beside Sakura. From her smile, I doubt she minded but it’s still… pretty darn awkward… especially after that weird commercial shooting.

As the van started moving, Sakura suddenly stretched and momentarily startled me.

“A-Ah, sorry Jurina-san, I stretch like that almost every single time when the van starts moving. Gets me ready for a short nap,” she said sheepishly.

“A nap huh… that sounds like a cat,” I chuckled a bit, “Cute.”

Me and my big, flirty mouth. Now everything’s going to be awkward–

“T-Thanks for the compliment, Jurina-san… it *is* a compliment… right?” Sakura-chan looked at me with a wry smile.

I nodded vigorously which rendered her to giggle.

“I’ve been wanting to ask but… you seem really out of character today. Especially around me…” She said softly, with a concerned tone, “Umm… do you hate me or something?”

Crap. I dug my own grave with how I’ve been acting and I didn’t realise it!

“No no! That’s not it really!” I waved my hands around to gesture a “no”, “It’s just uh… it’s…”

“Yes…?” She leaned closer to me. Is Sakura-chan this ‘aggressive’ when she wants to?

“I-It’s just.. Really complicated right now. But no, I have no ill-feelings towards you Sakura-chan. Please don’t worry,” I shrugged and sigh, which prompted her to place both hands on my shoulders all of a sudden.

“S-Saku–”

“Please… rely on me…”

“H-Huh…?”

Sakura-chan looked into my eyes with much sincerity, as if she was pleading for me to take her seriously, “I know we’re both supposed to be rivals for the next Sousenkyou… I know we don’t know each other as well. But…” she tightened her grip on my shoulders, “… You’re still a senior member I look up to and am still chasing after as an idol. I want to be recognised by you… we’ve been side by side way too often recently and yet whenever I see you, it seems as if you’re still clinging to the past, Jurina-san.”

My eyes widened in shock.

This girl…

She’s dangerously perceptive…

“… I may not be Matsui Rena-san… but I want to be acknowledged by you… even if I can’t be your equal…”

“Miyawaki-san, we’re here!” The driver suddenly called out to Sakura-chan, who did not budge.

“… If there’s anything I can help with that can relax your mind… please don’t hesitate to ask me… Okay?” As she said that, I swear I noticed her eyes getting watery and all amidst the shadows in the dimly lit car. She let go of me and got her things, about to leap out of the car but turned to me briefly with a smile, “Guess I didn’t take a nap huh haha. Have a pleasant evening, Jurina-san!”

The door closed as I shot a confused dazed look at Sakura-chan.

I never knew how strongly Sakura-chan felt about me.

“… We have a sense of understanding to the point that we didn’t have to use words but just having each other side to side makes me feel reassured…” I said to myself softly as I looked at my palms. Those were the words I vaguely remember saying during my last interview with Rena-chan. Words aimed at her. Words that seem fitting to my situation with Sakura-chan.

Have I unconsciously fell in love with Sakura-chan?

The way she intently tried to convey her concerns about me just now… the sincerity and care I could feel from every word she said…

…

The kind of warmth I missed.

I don’t care if I misunderstand her intentions nor this feeling swelling up in my heart.

I want to know Miyawaki Sakura-chan more.

-x-x-x-x-x-

The 24th of December.

Everyone in the 48 Group must be busy with their Christmas shopping now due to the Secret Santa task. I’m no exception.

I would have prepared something homemade for her but unfortunately, having work in Fukuoka isn’t doing me any favours. So I had something ordered at a jewellery shop which I’m a loyal patreon for. It’s the first time we had this kind of event in the group, so it’s quite a thrilling experience, not knowing who you’d get the present from till tomorrow.

I only recall ever consistently giving presents to Rena-chan till she graduated.

I stepped into the jewellery shop and talked to the shopkeeper who quickly gave me my order in a red palm-sized box that had a pink ribbon attached onto it for aesthetics and thanked him. As I was on my way out, two familiar pair of faces appeared in the shop and these two, are the two I’d never in my whole life would think to be together anywhere outside of the 48 group.

“N-No way…” I said softly in shock.

One of them looked at me in shock, the other, briefly startled but decided to stay cool.

“J-J-Jurina-sa-san?!” Sakura-chan yelped.

“… Fancy meeting you here, Jurina.”

“Sakura-chan… Rena… chan…… “ I shook, quickly shoving the present I got for Sakura into my leather jacket’s pocket, “What on earth are you both doing here…? Together even…?”

“I-I uh… We–”

Rena-chan spoke with confidence, eyes closed, “We’re here to collect something we both ordered. I presume you did the same?”

I felt a sharp pang in my heart. Haha… Rena-chan. She’s so cold to me now I should’ve guessed she’d act like this when we meet in person.

“P-Perhaps I did.”

“Perhaps… huh,” Rena-chan opened her eyes and looked at me, unimpressed.

At the point, Sakura-chan probably felt the tension between us both and stepped in immediately to prevent some kind of war from happening, “U-Umm! If you’d excuse me for stepping in,” she turned to me, “Rena-san and I so happened to met each other on the way here, nothing more nothing less, Jurina-san!”

“And she ended up accompanying you? That’s actually rare,” I crossed my arms.

“I don’t know if you’ve forgotten by Miyawaki Sakura here was and is one of the members of my Melonpan Alliance. I don’t see why I wouldn’t take the oppurtunity of catching up with her especially when we so happened to bump into each other.” Another cold statement from Rena-chan.

I haven’t felt so irritated in a while…

“Oh yeah? So you’d make small talks with anyone BUT me huh, Rena-chan?”

She looked away with downcast eyes, “I won’t make any comments, Jurina.”

I felt eyes on us as our tone of voice got more agitated. I let out a sigh and conceded to not cause any trouble, and especially not in front of Sakura-chan who seemed like she could faint any second now due to freaking out on how to stop us.

“Sorry. I’m getting out of line,” I looked at Sakura-chan, “Have a nice day with Rena-chan, Sakura-chan. I’ll be on my way.”

“M-Mm…”

I walked out of the store with heavy steps and closed the door behind me. Looking over my shoulders, I see Sakura-chan trying to console Rena-chan of sorts and it didn’t take a moment till they moved to the counter. Huh. If Sakura-chan can console Rena-chan in a blink of an eye, I probably should take her offer.

What a bad taste meeting Rena-chan has left me. I was supposed to be happy… but…

…

It hurts.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Today’s the day.

I’m all ready so what was it we had to do today?

I checked my phone for the basic bulletpoint ‘instructions’ that Nana-chan had composed on behalf of Yuihan for us who attended the meeting and scrolled to the last part. Now we just have to call up the member to meet up huh. I see.

Guess I’ll make the call now–

*riiiing*

Oh. A call with the hotel phone again.

“Hello?”

“Is this Matsui Jurina-san?”

“Yes it is.”

“I have a message for you from your manager that says to meet at the Kego Park and head to the tree which has a golden ribbon tied around it.”

“I understand. Thank you.”

“It’s my pleasure.”

Kego Park and a tree with a golden ribbon. Yuihan said that only 48 group members were doing this Secret Santa thing right? Otherwise I’d be seriously annoyed if it was the manager who was gifting me some tree in Kego Park for laughs.

“Here we go,” I made sure I had the gift in my overcoat and tightened my scarf as I made way to the Park via a taxi provided by the hotel.

-x-x-x-x-x-

Kego Park.

This place is one of the hotspots for illuminations in the evening in Fukuoka. Would’ve been nice if I could see it tonight. However, now’s the time to look for Anonymous-san while avoiding contact with the crowd gathering in this place. I pulled up my scarf so it would cover my mouth and made my way through the Park, being cautious to not get spotted while keeping an eye out for a golden ribbon around a tree.

Eventually I found it after a few minutes of trekking around with the cold air blowing at my face and lo and behold, someone WAS there. Under the tree, as if she was waiting for someone, with her head hung low.

And I could actually make out who it was despite that. She was dressed in a beige-coloured winter coat. I’m amazed she isn’t afraid that someone would know her and fans would flock around her, seeing how she’s from these parts.

It also hit me that she probably was the figure I had dreamt of that day.

I walked towards the tree slowly, and she took notice of me with a relieved smile on her face.

“Sakura-chan.”

“Hello there, Jurina-san. Surprised?” She giggled and showed me the piece of paper she had from the envelope, which clearly had my name written in Hiragana.

“I won’t lie that I’m not surprised at all but…” I showed her the same and she seemed to have made a small gasp in response, eyes widening.

I lowered my scarf to show her a smile, “Ain’t this a coincidence?”

She shook her head, “It’s not coincidence, Jurina-san…”

“Huh?”

“Remember what you said that day? You said how it’d be funny if we got each other’s names in our envelopes by fate. Well…” She reached out to my cheek, gently caressing it, “Looks like we’re bound by fate after all.”

What a bold move. This girl… she never ceases to surprise huh?

“I never knew you’re quite an assertive girl, Miyawaki Sakura-chan,” I gently held her hand that caressed my cheek and squeezed it lightly.

“Maybe I’m driven by the will to make you recognise me, Jurina-san.”

I chuckled, “You sure you’re not in love with me like how the other members often are?”

“Hmm…” She pulled her hand out of my grasp and cupped her chin, “I don’t think so? No.”

“Oh wow, you could at LEAST humour me, Sakura-chan,” I laughed forcefully.

“Though that doesn’t mean you can’t make me fall for you right?”

Dang this girl is good with her words like Takamina-san said…!

I couldn’t help but blush at that response.

“Ahaha Rena-san was right about you being extremely cute when you blush like that,” she smiled.

“W-Wait, Rena-chan said what?”

“Ah!” She covered her mouth and shook her head before digging her hand bag for something, “N-Nothing! H-Here you go! Merry Christmas, Jurina-san!”

The first one was a gold-coloured palm-sized box with a green ribbon attached onto it and the second item right under it was a slightly larger, but also gold-coloured, box.

“Whoa, two presents?”

“Right after seeing your name in my envelope it just fired me up and I was indecisive for the most parts…” She let out a weak laughter as she looked at the gifts in my hands.

“Can I open them now?”

“Mm, sure! I really hope you like them though.”

I decided to open the larger one first and saw a pair of wool mittens in the box. They looked handmade and had a faint gold colour along with some green and red linings along the frills. I tried them on enthusiastically and they fit perfectly.

“These are really nice and comfy! Thank you so much Sakura-chan!” I grinned, “Did you make them yourself?”

She nodded shyly, “I had some help with the measurements but other than that yes. I’m really glad you like them, Jurina-san.”

‘Help’ huh. Why am I willing to bet ‘she’ is the person who helped Sakura-chan…

“Next one is… uh… umm…” I tried to open the box with the mittens on which prompted a laugh from Sakura-chan.

“Jurina-san you’re really silly! You can take them off for now!”

“Aww but they’re so comfortable…” I pouted but did as she said and opened the other box, already being able to guess what was in here, just afraid it was the exact same one I had for her.

“A bracelet…”

“It seemed to fit you, so I got it. Apparently it’s a paired bracelet and—“

“Yeah. I know it is ‘cuz…” I swiftly took my present for her and placed it into her hands, “I’ve got something for you too.”

“This… can’t be…” She opened her box and saw the same bracelet, with an alternative colour but it was definitely a matching pair to the one she had given me.

“Fate works in mysterious ways doesn’t it, Sakura-chan?” I chuckled shyly, putting on the bracelet from Sakura-chan.

She probably stared at me blankly for a couple seconds before breaking out of her daze and faced the realisation we got a matching pair.

“I-Imagine we could’ve gotten the exact same one for each other though…” Sakura-chan looked pretty shaken up.

“But fate prevented that mishap from happening didn’t it? Also…” I helped Sakura-chan with her bracelet and placed the stars on our bracelets together, and a magnet stuck them together, forming into two stars being attached to one another.

“This is pretty cheesy huh?” I raised an eyebrow, smiling awkwardly.

“I think it’s really sweet though, Jurina-san,” Sakura-chan focused on me and the intensity of her gaze made me realise how close to each other we were standing.

“Guess it’s time for impromptu Part 2 of my gift to you then, Miyawaki Sakura-chan.”

“Hmm–?”

Taking the opportunity of the closeness we had, I closed in the gap and landed a kiss on the girl’s cheek, and a very small distance away from her lips. At that moment, I could see her cheeks immediately flaring up and she jumped away in a panic.

“U-Uwaa~!” She yelped in shock.

I laughed at her reaction, “Sorry, couldn’t help it. That’s all I could think of at the spur of the moment. Plus… You’re really… adorable… after all,” I blushed as well despite grinning as hard as I could.

“G-Geez… and I was so sure I’d never become the victim of your kissing antics, Jurina-san…” She gently rubbed the area I landed a kiss on, still embarrassed.

“Also…” I looked upwards at the branches of the tree above us, “… I would like you to watch out for me. I’ve given it some thought,” I placed a hand on my chest, “I want to understand what this feeling is when I’m with you. I want to know more of you personally… and I want to rely on you,” I looked at her with a serious gaze, “I want you to be by my side… as we support this 48 Group towards the unknown future. I’m sure fate made it as such we’d get into situations that would lead up to today.”

She returned the same serious gaze with a nod, but a smile shortly followed, “If you’re happy with having me by your side… I’d love to, Jurina-san. I too, want to see what else has in store for us.”

I reached my hand out to her for a handshake but she giggled and called me “silly” again as she leapt towards me, enveloping me in a warm embrace.

“Nothing happens by chance, my friend… No such thing as luck. A meaning behind every little thing, and such a meaning behind this. Part for you, part for me, may not see it all real clear right now, but we will, before long.”      

- Richard Bach

[a-mad-scientist-approaches]

Multiverse is a Curse Word (6)

Okay, hiatus time after this one, but I’ll try to get the next one out as soon as I can. Everyone who has been keeping track of this crazy thing so far, it has meant so much to me. Thank you!!

As always, Adeline Marks is @hntrgurl13‘s awesome OC, and the Dimension Jumper and Drifting Dimensions AUs are her creations also.

@the-subpar-ghost made the Adrift AU, a goldmine of feels, angst, and Ford-Mabel bonding.

The Addiford ship is from the mind of @scipunk63. I think you’ll like this chapter.

@deadpool-demon-diva and @thejesterlyfictionista. Here’s a new one, enjoy.

Minor spoiler: There’s flashbacks to alternate lives, and in one of these Stan is mentioned to have read Tolkien. This is from @amolecularmachine‘s brilliant fic By the Skin of Your Teeth. Go read it.

AO3  1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10  11

Chapter 6: Naturally-Occurring Nerdy Stuff

Addi felt guilt begin to crush her as soon as she heard Mabel whimper in her sleep. She had given Stanford the sword; she hadn’t tried hard enough to convince Wesley she could handle the job; she had encouraged her two companions to stay with the resistance even though she knew Wesley might try to get them involved; she had become entangled in the resistance herself. Addi sighed. The mistakes just kept piling up.

At another whine from Mabel she abandoned her position on watch and padded through the silk-soft green grass to where the girl was sleeping. The beauty of this planet’s forests would be a sight to behold in the morning.

“Hey, sweetie,” she said gently, running a hand through Mabel’s short brown curls, “hey, it’s okay, you’re safe, you’re safe …”

Mabel opened her eyes and looked around, reorienting herself. Addi continued to stroke her hair until her breathing evened out. The sound of wind rustling through delicate leaves soothed them both.

Eventually Mabel sat up and rested her chin on her knees, shifting her blanket so that it wrapped completely around her. Stanford hadn’t been eager to retrieve their supplies from the shuttle (delaying their departure through a portal), but Addi was now glad she had insisted. Having a halfway decent campsite encouraged a feeling of safety and homeliness, something they all needed.

“Not sleeping tonight?” she asked. Mabel shook her head silently and leaned against Addi, who enveloped her in a hug.

“You know it wasn’t your fault, right?”

Mabel remained quiet for a few seconds, then replied, “I keep going over and over it in my head, but I can’t see it happening any differently. I mean, when I swung the sword I didn’t know she was there, and I needed to shut the security doors.” She turned to Addi with anguish in her eyes. “Am I missing something? Was there anything I could have done to make it go right?”

Truth be told, Addi had no idea. Thirty years of travelling through the multiverse had pretty effectively demolished all her certainty and guarded scepticism. There was undoubtedly a universe where everything had gone right for Mabel, where no one had died or come near to death. There was also a universe where nothing had gone right. The chaos that perpetually engulfed the multiverse meant that Addi had rarely been able to do more than hope like hell she was not part of the latter, and wish that she occasionally caught a glimpse of the former.

“No. I think that was entirely out of your control.” Addi answered. “Everything has to happen somewhere, and that was what happened to you … but let’s play out a hypothetical situation: if you had missed that guard, and hit the control panel, what do you think would have happened afterwards?”

The teary girl thought. “She still had her gun … and she was definitely not afraid to use it,”

“Right. So regardless of whether she was simply trying to do her job, or protect her friends, or was hyped up on adrenaline, anger, or fear, she was also trying to hurt you and your great uncle. You were trying to keep yourself and your family safe.” She let that soak in for a moment before continuing. “Mabel, it is wonderful when you can find a win-win scenario, but they are not guaranteed all the time.”

The girl sighed as though some of the weight had been lifted from her. There was still a long way to go, but it was a start.

“It’s not your fault either, Addi.” She said unexpectedly. “Blaming yourself for being betrayed is something overly-dramatic TV action heroes do to gain tragic sympathy from viewers. It’s compelling, but silly. And you’re not silly, Grauntie Addi.” She finished sternly. Then she nestled into the speechless woman’s lap matter-of-factly.

⃝

Ford was awoken by daylight streaming through a parting in the trees to hit him precisely in the eyes. Rolling over to avoid it, he found he was the last to wake. Adeline and Mabel were both enclosed in a blanket, softly playing a hand game.

“Morning sunshine,” Adeline said when she saw him.

“I’m awake enough to recognise sarcasm,” Ford warned, sitting up.

“Sarcastic? I? Your paranoia is getting the better of you again, Stanford,”

“Here you go, Grunkle Ford.” Mabel deposited a fruit in his lap and crouched next to him. “It’s not poisonous, I ate one before you woke up.”

“You what?”

“She’s just messing with you,” Adeline said, shaking her head.

“Oh, so you have learnt some caution,” Ford said, relieved.

Mabel laughed. “Oh no, I totally ate, like, three. But Addi knew it was okay,”

Still mildly concerned, Ford finished the sweet tasting food.

“Are you okay, though?” he asked tentatively after swallowing. He could tell by the shadow which temporarily dampened her light mood that she knew he was not talking about the fruit.

Mabel shrugged slightly, avoiding his eyes. “I could do with a couple million stuffed animals and a huge family hug pile,” she said, her voice catching because they all knew that neither were possible.

Regardless, he would do his best. He put as much love into the following embrace as he could muster, and the surprised giggle Mabel made when Addi joined in allowed him to believe that they were equivalent to at least a hundred fluffy toys.

⃝

“I wish we could stay here,” Mabel said wistfully as they packed up.

“As do I, however I think it would be safer if we continued to move on. That threat Wesley gave you was decidedly ominous,” Ford directed at Adeline.

“I don’t think he’d come after us.” She frowned. “Then again, I didn’t think he was a flipping insane-” she paused.

“Butthead!” Mabel supplied.

Ford nodded his agreement and checked the readings on his analyser before altering his calculations.

“Another portal should be opening up around here-”

“There!” Mabel shouted. “Bye forest!”

They stepped through the bright blue circle.

Ford had never gotten used to crossing dimensions, and he doubted he ever would. The experience was the same for everyone. They caught flashes of events from their alternate selves’ lives.

… he was in a darkened room and a terrified boy who could only be Mabel’s brother was pointing a memory gun at him …

… he was in a hospital bed and feeling worse than ever in his life, but Stan was making him grin like an idiot by admitting he had read Tolkien …

… he was staring down in shock at the lifeless form of his niece, who had just managed to plunge Adeline’s sword into the control panel before being shot down …

⃝

Addi shivered and took a deep breath, throwing off the lingering feeling that she was falling off a cliff towards the Gravity Falls river. Stanford was looking pretty shaken up too.

“Hello forest!” Mabel said cheerfully. Their new location was rather less pleasant, but it did seem to be another forest. It had dry, browny-green, tough-looking trees rather than the earlier lush, deep green ones, and raw, baking heat emanated from every available surface, reflecting the sun’s glare. The pale pink sky was stubbornly clear of cloud cover.

“We’re going to need water,” Addi stated.

It was almost three hours before they found any. By then, all of them were exhausted and soaked with sweat. They were also extremely tired of the rocky, uneven terrain.

Mabel let out a groan of relief upon seeing the river. Without saying another word she threw off her boots, her black coat, and her sweater, and flopped into the coolness, remembering to keep it away from her face until they knew it was a fresh water current. Addi, too, immediately stripped off her outer layers and sat beneath a tree on the river’s edge, allowing the cool liquid to soothe her burning feet.

Stanford held off his moment of peace, of course. She expected nothing less from the man who would work himself to exhaustion on the portal before he slept. He took out a capsule-like device and trickled some water into it. It beeped and flashed green.

“Okay, it’s fresh,”

Mabel instantly dunked her head into the water and lay face-down. Stanford added his own contributions to the pile of clothes, including a starry, dark blue sweater that Mabel had obviously made. This revealed something that made Addi snort.

“Nice tat,” she laughed. Ford flushed slightly and instinctively clapped a hand over the cheerful little star inked onto his neck. Its yellow colour exactly matched Mabel’s shirt.

“Shut up,” he said irritably, and waded into the river.

“I want one just like it,” Mabel enthused, coming up for air to hear the exchange.

“No. Never,”

“Aw, you’re no fun,”

Stanford narrowed his eyes. “What is this? My niece has suddenly become deluded and irrational! She must have been bitten by the deadly Lunacy Beetle of Madron, whose poison can only be flushed out by,” he surged over to Mabel, “extensive water exposure!”

Mabel shrieked and caught him in the face with a blast of water. This did little to deter him, and Mabel was plucked out of the river and mercilessly dunked back under over and over. Droplets trailed sparkles through the air. The girl’s war cries and vows of vengeance were interspersed with splutters, rendering her as threatening as a kitten. On Dunk Number Five however, she managed to grab onto Ford’s shirt effectively enough to pull him under with her, and when they emerged again they were both coughing up water.

“So is the madness all out of your system? Do you consider me sufficiently ‘fun’ again?” Ford asked once his lungs were clear.

“Yeah, yeah, you’ve made your point.” Conceded Mabel. “BUT, that water fight wasn’t fair. You are way out of your league, old man.”

“Oh, well in that case, maybe I need to enlist Addi’s help. Together we should surely be a match for you.” He turned to look at Adeline, but she was already crashing towards them. Ford’s confident expression was wiped away however when Addi dived at him rather than his niece. Mabel cheered as they went under.

Below the surface it was difficult to discern much of anything, the silt being so recently stirred up, but Addi did see a glint as Ford’s glasses came off. She caught them in one hand and grinned mischievously down at him, close enough to see his matching expression. She was very conscious of how he had not removed his arm from around her waist since they had fallen. Also, she needed air.

“Is that a jet ski?” asked Mabel when they resurfaced. They looked, Addi returning Ford’s glasses.

The river was very broad, so much so that the opposite bank was a blur. However, there was what looked like a small vehicle heading in their general direction.

“I don’t think they’ve seen us. It’s most likely a patrol of some kind. Nevertheless, we don’t want to be noticed,” Stanford said warily.

On the bank they shoved their feet into their boots and Addi hid their dry clothes and bags in a bush. A layer of leaves combined with rock-hard dirt eliminated the need to cover their tracks, so they retreated straight into the refuge provided by the forest, and waited. It was only then Addi realised she had forgotten to grab their weapons in her haste.

She expected the vehicle to pass by on a quick sweep, then continue down the river. Instead, it came to a stop not far from their supplies and the rider dismounted. The amphibian-like person walked unassumingly forward, bulbous eyes fixed on a monitor in their hands.

Seriously? Our luck cannot be this bad, Addi thought disbelievingly as they were forced to back away indefinitely as the stranger moved innocently towards them.

After a ridiculous sixty feet of this, the alien even following their evasive and curved paths, there were more footsteps off to their side. Another person with a monitor was heading their way. Addi stopped breathing as herself and her friends crouched in the middle of some large bushes and waited for the beings to pass them by. Through the leaves, she saw them gesture to a sick-looking tree and compare monitors. Mabel released a breath and Stanford relaxed.

Environmentalists. No threat. Unless you hurt their trees.

She jerked her head towards an outcrop of boulders a reasonable distance from where the scientists were working. Quickly and quietly, the three of them left the site of interest.

“That never happens to us!” Mabel said happily to Ford. “It always turns out to be bounty hunters, or space police, or some other person you’ve upset.”

“I’ve upset? Allow me to remind you of a certain gambler who destroyed half a market square not a week ago,” Ford responded in mock offence.

“Ooh, shiny.” Mabel noticed, deftly changing the subject to look under the gap between a boulder and the ground. “I think I can – ACK!” She suddenly disappeared from view.

“MABEL!” Both adults yelled. Stanford leaped to where she had been sliding into the gap, and he too disappeared.

Knowing it probably was not a good idea, but going ahead with it anyway, Addi grabbed a sharp rock and followed. There was a near invisible hole under the boulder with a small, glittering white crystal on its other side. Bracing herself, she dropped into the darkness.

It was like a slide. A really rough, nearly vertical slide. Amid the tumbling of rocks, she heard shouting coming from below her and prayed the others were okay. She hit the floor of a cavern with a jolt, but managed to stay on her feet, and spun around with the rock raised, searching for some sort of cave-dwelling monstrosity. Instead, she saw Stanford and Mabel both gazing around in ecstasy, spouting off half to each other and half to themselves about the wonders surrounding them.

The wonders in question were many, many, larger versions of the crystal marking the entrance to the hole. The entire place was filled with stars. Addi dropped the rock.

“Addi, Addi look! It’s so pretty, it’s like magic! Is it magic? It could be magic! What if there’s fairies down here? -”

“Adeline, the luminous properties of these crystals is amazing! It appears they can absorb and store energy almost perfectly, and only release a small amount as light, creating this wonderful glimmer!-”

“-fairies use them for building houses! Or maybe there’s an underground society of dwarfs that come and mine this place! Or even-”

“-significant usefulness as batteries or even devices of their own! Do you think we could fashion some sort of communicator out of them? Maybe-”

“-dragon treasure! I could probably make a bracelet out of these-”

“”-look, even as we’re speaking they’re growing brighter from the kinetic energy produced by sound vibrations!”

“I need some!”

“I must take a sample!”

“So, I guess you two haven’t encountered endo-ergon quartz before?” queried Addi, amused at their excitement.

“You have?” replied Ford, carefully unearthing some and placing them in a pocket.

“A few times. I’ve never seen a deposit of this size before. You are right, they make good batteries. I use them when I can to power things like Big Bertha, my transmitter, my portal beacon …”

Which reminds me, I should set that up, Addi remembered. She grabbed a couple of crystals for herself.

“Wow, they’re pretty handy.” Called Mabel, collecting some of the smaller ones. “This cave is full of naturally-occurring nerdy things! Except these rocks are actually beautiful and useful, which is completely different to Dipper’s collection at home. I think he has some gravel in there.” She mused.

There was an exit at the back of the cavern which returned them to the forest. Once they were in the open Mabel turned to Addi.

“Grauntie Addi, I’m going to make you a friendship bracelet. And you Grunkle Ford. And one for me too,” With that decision, she began to run back up the incline to where the rock pile was situated.

“Grauntie?” Ford said in surprise.

“Yes. I’m very proud,”

“I guess that decides it,” said Ford absentmindedly.

“Decides what?”

“Oh, er, I was going to ask whether you wanted to stay with us.” He said, a bit awkwardly. “I mean, you’ve saved our lives so many times already, and you are extremely capable, and amazing at, well, everything. I honestly cannot thank you enough.” He drew in a breath. “I know that I’m asking a lot, for you to keep helping us, so hopefully we’ll be able to return the favour at some point.”

Addi opened her mouth to deny the notion that she expected anything in return, to say that it had been her privilege to meet them, and get to know them, and spend time with them. However, Ford didn’t seem to be done.

“Mabel clearly loves you and wants you to come with us. I have to say, it would be greatly beneficial for her to have someone other than myself to care for her, especially someone who actually seems to know what they’re doing with kids.” He gave a quick, but nervous, grin at that. “I, myself, value your company exceedingly, and I would … greatly appreciate it if you decide to remain.”

Are you kidding? She wanted to scream. Of course! She figured that would be fairly alarming however. A shout of joy was all she wanted to do, though, because she could feel a swell of emotions about to explode from her like a volcano of happiness. He couldn’t know how much what he had said meant to her. He hadn’t even known her in his dimension! At home she had always thought of herself as good, but nowhere near as brilliant as her two friends. Yet here she was, and Stanford was telling her that she was the capable one, was nervously asking her to stay with him as though there was any other option she had considered, and above all was completely trusting her with the life of the wonderful child he had in his care when only a week ago he had seen her as his enemy.

“So … will you stay?”

The volcano erupted.

Completely impulsively, but without any regrets, she stepped forward and kissed him, entwining their fingers as she did. After a moment of uncertainty, she was relieved to find him kissing her back.

⃝

Whatever Mabel had expected was the reason Addi and Ford were taking so long, seeing them making out in a clearing full of light was not it. The first thing she did was react appropriately.

“MATCH MADE!” she screamed.

[kaoru-chibimaster]

How Not to Run an Event

Don’t Do What The Kingdom Hearts Big Bang Did.

Just Don’t.

Rant under the cut, so like... Seriously, scroll past this. This is me letting my feelings out and I doubt anyone’s interested in that.

-o-o-o-o-

So basically this event started out pretty hype. I was super excited to join in with something related to the Kingdom Hearts community. Before this, I just wrote fic. Like, I was so far in my bubble, I wasn’t aware of zines, I wasn’t aware of other collabs, I wasn’t even aware of some BNFs (so I’m sure I got weird looks for asking who some people were when basically everyone knew who these “some people” were). I just wanted to write and I crossed my fingers and hoped at least someone might enjoy it when I posted it. 

Joining fandom was not a sudden life-changing event for me or anything like that. I was 13 and just getting into forums and had essentially only had knowledge of the KH fanbase through gamefaqs, youtube, kh-vids and kh13 (and fanfiction.net a little later). Before then, my “fandom” was my close friends and I all being fans of the games. I saw posts and read fics and sometimes commented in forums but I was not involved. For the longest time I’d never really been involved.

Big Bang felt like a way to change that. I was so looking forward to the people I’d meet and the art and fics I’d get to see. I’d made friends over the past few months and I’m so, so grateful to BB for that. I was excited for all of the up and coming events planned for Dreamwidth. I’d started out in DW for FFXV related stuff but I’d never actually used my account, so I’m thankful for the opportunity to really learn DW and start using it more extensively. I loved the little events and activities like the posts where we could share our works in progress. That’s another thing I’m grateful for; there are a number of fics of mine that would’ve never gotten off the ground if not for WIP Wednesdays. I also really appreciated that this was set up as a pro-shipping community and that it emphasized that participants could ship what they wanted without being harassed.

Aside from that? 

Downhill. 

Like, at first it was a slow roll down the hill: the discord server would have some channels overrun with discussion I was either uninterested in or outright made me uncomfortable. I’m not going to name drop what these discussions were and who had started them but I muted them one by one until there were only maybe three or four channels (out of a good chunk, I didn’t count but it was a hell of a lot more than three or four) that were unmuted. It’d devolved from a lot of genuine and interesting discussions where we helped each other out with fics/art and just had general fun talking to each other into channels full of the same handful of people talking over each other or venting. Not at all what I was interested in from a community. It wasn’t too bad though because the server wasn’t necessary for the BB so if the people still there needed that space then it’s not my right to give them shit for it. It was, however, totally within my right to remove myself from it, just as it was my right to feel uncomfortable with it.

That was then though.

Right here and now? 

It’s a shitshow. It’s a dumpster fire. It’s basically anarchy.

My discomfort with the direction the server went in was hand in hand with my loss of motivation for my participation. I can’t even look at the fic I was writing for this event without feeling upset and stressed over it. So I dropped. 

And apparently, so did a good number of other people.

The mods made a post about how We’re Committed (which no one can find now because they deleted all their social media but I’ll get to that). They urged other people within the server to stay dedicated to the event. A rebuttal was made that pointed out the sort of environment they’d created that’d made a lot of people feel the same way as me: uncomfortable. The event mods were understaffed and constantly diverting attention to other/future events and one of them didn’t even communicate with the rest of the server save to make announcements, and the cherry on top? 

They expected the participants to make the effort. They expected to create a server and essentially let everyone grope around in the dark until they found a handhold. They outright told us they wouldn’t hold anyone’s hands, which was as condescending a statement as one could get, and then somehow expected the whole thing to work out? When the rest of the server occupants, including people who hadn’t spoken for ages and people who hadn’t spoken at all, started voicing their complaints, the mods acted like they were being backed into a corner they’d already placed themselves in.

They lashed out. Like children. Like a little kid on the playground confronted by their teacher after they pushed another kid and then loudly proclaimed “He pushed me first!”.

They backed out of the event and left it to the server mods. They, after having made a big deal out of commitment to the event, dropped it like a hot potato. 

And then they sent this nonsense:

Just. Out of nowhere.

It might’ve been salvaged if they left it in the hands of the other mods, but they cancelled it. They fucking cancelled all the people who put hard work into making fics and art and put time into this. Every single participant wasted their time on this. And it wasn’t just a few weeks, this fucking event started in April and they had the gall to just up and cancel it.

The rest of the email below, which is just as much a wall of text as this rant is, is essentially an overly worded temper tantrum in which the mods blame the participants for everything that went wrong. Like, I get it. You’re only human. You’re stressed too. You suffer anxiety like the rest of us. I get it. Yes, it was on us to communicate with our partners. But when we come to the mods for help? The last fucking thing you should ever tell us is “we don’t hold your hands”. No wonder no one ever came to you guys for help. 

But what really gets me is the fact that not every participant in this event was in the discord. Not everyone saw the drama that went down. Not everyone saw this coming. Imagine having joined this event only to find an email in your inbox a month before we were supposed to start posting telling you that the event is cancelled and it’s all your fault.

Makes the mods come across as incompetent at best. Malicious at worst.

And seriously, regardless of what’s going on in your life, what sort of hangups or problems you might have...

YOU DO NOT START AN EVENT LIKE THIS WITHOUT BEING READY TO FULLY COMMIT YOURSELF TO IT. IF YOU CAN’T HANDLE CRITICISM, IF YOU AREN’T GOOD AT COMMUNICATING WITH PEOPLE, IF YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE IDEA OF MODDING FOR AN EVENT THAT YOU STARTED THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE STARTED IT.

This is common sense. Seriously. I’d never put myself in a position of leadership without being able to accept the responsibility that comes with it. Because it leads to shit like this.

I’m upset. I’d dropped the event a few weeks ago and still I’m genuinely upset. Because nobody deserved this. None of the participants deserved to have their time wasted like this. Nobody deserved the drama and the bullshit that was dredged up from this. Nobody deserved to have this bomb dropped on them literally a month before posting was going to start.

It was supposed to be fun. For me, a chance to finally contribute something in the Kingdom Hearts fandom as part of a fandom effort. A chance to reach outside of my bubble and make friends and create. And while I did get to reach out, I did get to create, and I’m going to continue to contribute on my own as I always did, I can’t say anything good about the Big Bang beyond that. All good will there might’ve been for it was ruined the moment the former mods sent that passive aggressive email.

Who the hell wants to see that nonsense in their email anyway. Aren’t they grown ass adults? They ought to know better. A simple “We regret to inform you that we’re cancelling this event” would have been enough. The rest was unnecessary and, quite frankly, downright nasty and that was honestly what pissed me off enough to make this rant. 

In the end if it had silently died, I wouldn’t have even minded at this point.

But, well...

The Big Bang had to go out with a bang, I guess.

Too bad it was a shit grenade and now there’s shit all over the walls and I’m just glad I’m not the one who has to clean all that shit up.

[crazy-grrrl-on-the-computer]

2, 3, 10, 16, 17, 18 for the fic writer thing!!

Aaaaah,thank you~!!!! >w

2. what fics (that are currentlyupdating) are your favorites in the fandom you’re in

…I haven’t been actively readingfanfic in over a year because I haven’t had the energy to keep up withmulti-chapter fics. Occasionally, I still read oneshots, though. ;;n;;

3.  name 3 underratedfic authors in your fandom

There are alot, I’m sure! I haven’t been keeping up with fics lately, so I really can’tanswer this question accurately. (Also, questions like these are so unfair, ohmy goodness, I just end up wanting to name everyone and promote their work andshower them with all my love because they deserve it!) I’m… actually not evensure how many of the underrated fic authors from back when I was still activelykeeping up are still writing Boueibu fic now. But… I think I can name a fewfrom that time. Sorry if I’m too out of date!

@freezingdreamer- This s1e10 Yumoto metahad me hooked and I still think about it a lot! I regret that I haven’t readmore of their fics yet, but I was skimming some of the writing on their blogand I just absolutely adore the creativity and cuteness in them!  But the ones that really get me in the feelsare the ones that explore a character’s inner thoughts and how that contributesto their actions in a situation. I am a huge sucker for it!

@feicastro32- I love how they write about Io and Ryuu! It’s either so sweet and precious itmakes your heart explode from cuteness or so bittersweet and angsty it breaksyour heart instead. ;;w;; I wish I had the energy to keep up with everythingbecause I feel like I’ve been missing out on so many amazing things all thistime. >v

As for somenewer (or at least more recent) fic authors, I also very recently came acrosssome writing from @cupkayke and @yufuin-ens and I love the way they portray thecharacters so well! Both of them write very cute fics focusing on characterdynamics that are so intimate and intriguing I can’t help but get drawn in. Theygive my heart a warm fuzzy feeling~

10. alternate universes, canon divergence,or in-canon?

ALL OF THEABOVE! I LOVE ALL OF IT! HOW CAN I LIMIT MYSELF TO JUST ONE? I WANT ALL THE THINGS!*grabby hands* They are all excellent ways to explore characters, differentdynamics, and story arcs~

16. first fic you remember reading inthe fandom you’re in?

I think one of the first Boueibufics I read was from the very early days when there were maybe only 2 or 3pages of fic on FFN and AO3. (Aaaah, nostalgia~ ;;v;;) After I binged the first6 eps (which were all that had come out by the time I found the show anddecided to watch it), I immediately went to FFN and found the few fanfics thatwere there.

The first one I remember reading wasIoryuu, of course, and I remember it being about the two of them as kids at aschool dance together because everyone was big on speculating how they couldhave met as kids around that time. And I think it was Ryuu who kept gettingpicked on by the other kids for looking too much like a girl, so Io decides togo up to him and asks something like “Will you dance with me,Cinderella?” Forgive me if it was actually the other way around. It hasbeen about 2 years since I read it, so my memory is fuzzy.

It was a really cute short fic, butI can’t remember what it was called (it may have actually been called“Cinderella”/“Dance with me, Cinderella” or something alongthose lines) and when I went to look for it again I couldn’t find it. So, Iwonder if it was deleted. *cries* It was really adorable and one of my favoritefics. ;;v;; Seriously, if anyone remembers/recognizes what fic I’m talkingabout, please let me know!

But the first Boueibu fic I read on AO3 was World Domination  by starwhale97 and tbmd1066. At least that’s what myAO3 History tells me. (If that wasn’t it, then the actual first fic I read onthere may have been deleted long ago before I noticed and I just don’t rememberbecause my brain is just a jumble of fond memories with no names attached.) The beginning of this fic has a “Pinky and the Brain” kind of vibe to it, which is hilarious.It’sa lot of crack and it made me laugh. Kinshirou is disgusted, Arima is high, and Akoya is passive-aggressive and very gay. Zundar did not sign up for this. XD

17. any crazy first-time fanfictionexperiences?

For Boueibu? Not really, I don’tthink. My experience with fic in this fandom has been pretty tame. Thankgoodness.

But in general… back in my HighSchool Musical days at the height of my obsession, I officially got into fanfic(although I was technically writing fic years before I even knew what it was)when I created and account on FFN. Somehow, I ended up hopping between HSM fic andFlight 29 Down fic (among other mostly Disney-related things), and I ended upgetting really into one Flight 29 Down fic that the author stopped beforefinishing.

So, I was really excited when theauthor said they were going to rewrite the fic. And when the first chapter wasposted, it was definitely a really great start, but I misread the author’s noteand thought they said the rewrite was just going to be that one chapter.Basically, an entire multi-chaptered fic condensed into just one chapter thatdidn’t resolve any of the plot. So, because I was young and inexperienced (onlya wee inexperienced teen who was so new to being able to use the internet foranything other than school research), I ended up leaving a review saying that Iliked the first chapter but I thought it was a letdown that they were onlygoing to stop with the one chapter after all the hype they built up for it(that review was mostly incoherent drivel).

I was dumb and I only realized mymistake MUCH LATER when I had already embarrassed myself by getting into a passive-aggressiveargument with an “anonymous reviewer” who called me out for beingrude. (Rightly so, mind you. I had been pretty rude and undeservingly bitter withthat first review.) This argument went on for some time through each of thesubsequent chapters that were posted and it basically went something likethis…

Anonymous (who I’m almost 99%certain was the author or one of their friends calling me out for being an assfor everyone to see): *throws insults at me about how I’m immature,self-entitled, and clearly need to get a life*

Me: *tries to defend myself for myfandom interests while simultaneously apologizing to the author for how rudethe anon was for arguing in the comments WHILE I WAS ALSO ARGUING IN THECOMMENTS*

Me, eventually: *apologizes to theauthor for being an ass and genuinely begs forgiveness for my sins*

Yup. *shudders* I never did anythinglike that again because I learned my lesson and I’m still entirely embarrassedthat this incident happened in the first place. I feel awful for causing theauthor so much trouble and being an ungrateful little shit. u-u

18. a detail you’re really proud ofputting in one of your fics

UM, I can’treally answer this one either because all of the details I’m especially proudof are foreshadowing… and, by talking about them, I’d completely ruin thesurprise. And of course most of the fics those spoilery details pertain to areones that are still in-progress or haven’t been posted yet. Aha. ^^’

Feelfree to send me more~