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[beansidhes]

THE THREE DEATHS OF MARY MACDONALD : AN ORIGINAL MOTION PICTURE SOUNDTRACK !

what  is  a  life?  a  series  of  yeses  and  noes,  photographs  you  shove  in  a  drawer  somewhere,  loves  you  think  will  save  you  but  that  cannot.  continuing  to  move,  ENDURING,  not  stopping  even  when  there  is  pain.  that's  all  life  is,  he  wants  to  tell  her.  it's  continuing.

FEAR by sleeping at last. plays over the scene where eoghan macdonald is informed of his wife’s death, while the young mary watches on.

MAGGIE MAY by rod stewart. heard when the bartender placates a young margaret macdonald by singing a song named for her.

HERE WE GO by norman. i will run, i will rise, i will grow. a bit too intense, but chosen mostly for the beat. plays over mary’s sorting into gryffindor house.

PROBLEMS by mother mother. you and me are not the same. i am a sinner, you are a saint. plays while mulciber & mary duel for the first time. as song choices go, it’s fairly deliberate - the jaunty nature is in direct contrast to the serious grudge that forms on this day, as mary beats him.

BITCH (TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE) by lennon stella. plays over the scene immediately following the duel, when mary hits mulciber with a zinger that he will never really forget. ‘our blood doesn’t look as different as you thought it did, does it, marcus?’ chosen mostly for the beat.

GRACE KELLY (ACOUSTIC) by mika. background music in the three broomsticks on mary’s first hogmseade trip, which also happens to be our first hint of her huge crush on sirius black.

THE NIGHT by the last days of our past. plays over mulciber’s attack.

MEDICINE by daughter. you’ve got a warm heart, you’ve got a beautiful brain, but it’s disintegrating. mary’s possibility by lykke li arc is actually medicine by daughter.

DAUGHTER by sleeping at last. and all you gotta do is put one foot in front of you. plays over the scene where eoghan reads through mary’s owl results and tells her how proud her mother would have been.

JUPITER by flower face. i’m certain it must be holy to feel something so pure. plays as sirius creates a private bubble for mary in the middle of a gryffindor house party, intensifies as he joins her within it. turning point moment, for what has, until now, been a schoolgirl crush.

BRAVE NEW WORLD by kalandra. is this the world we were meant to grow in? somebody tell me where we’re going? plays over the montage that closes out mary’s hogwarts years. juxtaposes the genuinely joyful flashes that are included within it and really intensifies the flashes of the ongoing war outside of the school - a war that mary chooses to fight, when the invitation is extended to join the order of the phoenix.

LYING TO YOU by keaton henson. and as we lie in bed i feel lonely, though we’re young i feel eighty years old. plays over sirius encouraging mary to go to the wedding as peter’s date. ‘that’s my mary.’

WHISPERS by halsey. sabotage the things i love most. lyrically really good, chosen more for those than the music itself. plays around the scene’s where mary is pushing eoghan away.

SEX ON FIRE by kings of leon. if it’s not forever, if it’s just tonight. plays over the final scene at lily & james’ wedding ; mary makes a promise that she will never keep ( to apologise to peter ), due to sirius sweeping her off her feet - literally & figuratively. a pivotal scene. it’s important to see them as the flawed people they are, and to note that intentional or not, their whirlwind hurt people.

TELL ME A STORY by ramin djawadi. plays over the scene shared between mary & maggie following maggie’s graduation from hogwarts school.

BABY TIGER by maple glider. i think my mind is fine, i’m fully aware it’s just the time. plays while sirius & mary lounge in bed ; mary traces sirius’ tattoos, and they share a laugh.

WATCH YOUR BACK by sam tinnesz. we’re standing face to face with the hearts that turned to black. plays over the attack on diagon alley, as mulciber advances on & subsequently attacks mary ( for the second time ).

SUSPICION by lp. crippled cruel emotion, enough to turn an ocean turn to green. plays in the background of the leaky cauldron while sirius and mary discuss the spy within the order, and theorise on who it might be. there needs to be a more acoustic version of it - this is the closest i’ve gotten to something with the exact vibe, but it’s important to note it’s not suspicion between the lovers and instead, on everyone else.

SAVE MY LOVE by lonr & amber mack. and now you’re slipping away, and i’m hoping you don’t drift too far. plays over sirius & mary’s fight. ‘go fuck yourself, sirius’ / ‘why would i do that when you’ve already done it for me?’

PUT IT ON ME by matt maeson. storm in the sky, fire in the trees. if there’s nothing but pain, put it on me. there’s no other way to say it : plays as sirius & mary fuck in the safe house kitchen. the only reason there’s a sex scene in this bio is because i wanted to attach this song to it, on the soundtrack.

SHE KNOWS (INSTRUMENTAL) by j cole, amber coffeman & cults. bad things happen to the people you love and you find yourself praying up to heaven above, but honestly i’ve never had much sympathy cause those bad things always saw them coming for me. specifically this version, which isn’t on spotify. begins with the safe houses protection falling & plays while caradoc and mary battle the death eaters that descend. continues playing even up to the revelation that mary is pregnant.

LAST MOMENTS by trevor gureckis. plays as mary snaps her wand and throws what remains into the sea below, before following caradoc back inside of the ferry they flee england aboard. i specifically wanted the ocean sounds and tune that plays at the end of old, but i couldn’t find it, so,

ELEANOR RIGBY by the beatles. eleanor rigby died in the church and was buried along with her name. plays over the first half of the end credits. the very first source of inspiration for mary’s character and what every other facet was built from.

[silastm]

 * 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐬 : 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑠𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 .  

           music   plays   a   massive   part   of   si’s   life   and   he   is   sure   to   express   so   by   drowning   out   the   average   day’s   noise   with   a   carefully   curated   playlist   of   songs   he   will   listen   to   over   and   over   without   fatigue   .   whether   skating   ,   hiking   ,   or   in   the   car   on   a   drive   ,   he   un   -   complicates   things   by   having   one   playlist   for   all   situations   .   from   the   highly   expected   alternative   punk   bands   to   a   slight   turn   towards   edm   rave   music   ,   with   dabbles   in   hip   hop   /   rap   ,   silas’s   go   -   to   playlist   is   reflective   of   his   values   :   down   -   to   -   earth   ,   unembellished   ,   and   consistent   .

* 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐬 : 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑢𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑧𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 & 𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑟𝑔𝑦 .

           my   own   personal   muse   booster   to   get   into   a   headspace   to   write   him   ,   each   song   carries   an   energy   for   a   new   facet   of   silas   .   that’s   on   me   is   his   titular   song   and   his   original   inspiration   ,   lamenting   a   self   -   loathing   and   self   -   destructive   tendency   with   the   echoes    “   that’s   on   me   ,   i   know   /   it’s   all   my   fault   .   ”   streetcar   adds   on   a   sense   of   latency   ,   some   failed   potential   he   has   yet   to   reach   and   the   fear   of   life   passing   him   by   .   the   first   screamo   style   alt   punk   song  (   watd   )  to   enter   the   playlist   touches   on   his   phase   of   hedonism   ,   a   period   of   self   -   medicating   that   only   made   his   inner   battle   with   his   demons   worse   tenfold   .   

          obstacle   1   hits   heavily   into   the   less   -   than   -   glamorous   underbelly   of   the   celeb   sphere   ,   red   eyed   and   hitting   rock   bottom   .   makedamnsure   finds   a   man   recovered   but   at   a   crossroads   ,   well   aware   of   his   own   shortcomings   ,   desperate   for   a   connection   that   is   more   genuine   than   the   superficiality   he   faces   on   a   day   to   day   but   well   aware   his   self   -   destructive   tendencies   will   lead   to   a   ruinous   ending   .   (   despite   this   ,   he   hungers   for   something   real .  and   yet   denies   himself   any   desire   with   a   self   -   hating   discipline   unmatched   .   )   the   playlist   ends   with   a   nod   to   how   it   started   ,   endlessly   self   -   deprecating   ,   but   with   an   element   of   hope   :   he   knows   his   suffering   is   self   imposed   ,   and   aspires   to   release   himself   from   his   own   sense   of   undeserving   ,   if   only   one   longing   step   at   a   time   .