#smth about holiness seems to always end up in my writing

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

Hunger

I posted this a bit ago, but I think I accidentally deleted it while cleaning up my blog. So I edited it a bit and thought I should post it again. I think it's a neat look at Majexatli and the fact they're a Malarite.

CW: Hunting, Violence, Everything you'd imagine would come with worship of Malar (a Chaotic Evil deity of hunting, bloodlust, bestial violence)

//

Majexatli wondered, sometimes, what drew them to the hunt. 

It wasn’t something they took the time to consider before the Nautiloid, when they prowled the Sword Coast in wildshape. Back then they rationalized it; it was much easier to hunt and eat in wildshape than to gather ingredients and make camp and cook something. Having most of their meals be bloody and raw made the ones they had outside of wildshape that much more special.

Now, though? They spent their days as a person, every night there was a camp with plenty of rations, there was wine and cooked meats and soups and bread enough for everyone. There were traders who could sell them any array of foods, there were greens and mushrooms a plenty along the road, abandoned campsites and kitchens with all sorts of meats and produce. 

Majexatli didn’t need to hunt, every night they could curl up by a fire with a full belly.

So what drew them to the hunt? Why did they still feel a hunger clawing at them? A restlessness in their own skin? 

Sometimes at night, Majexatli watched Astarion hunt while prowling in the shadows and lurking in trees. He was effective enough but clumsy. As much as he has grown better at stealth, at ambushing enemies with his bow or dagger, he was different when he had just his teeth, when his mind was preoccupied with hunger. It was quick and inelegant, never drawn out, he picked whatever animal he could find, it didn’t matter what it was so long as they had blood. 

It seemed wasteful.

Sometimes Majexatli entertained the thought of teaching him how to hunt properly, the art of drawing it out. Maybe they could have him hunt them, make him prove himself before spilling their blood. Never were his eyes more present and alive than when their blood was on his tongue.

They could teach him the rules of the hunt.

They shouldn’t, they knew, shouldn’t drag him down with them. They were supposed to be the kind and wise druid coaxing him back from the edge, rather than echoing the dark whispers in their mind and showing him the shards of divinity that could be in everything if you tore into the flesh enough, how if you swallowed holiness bloodied and raw enough it could fix you from the inside.

But Astarion was a vampire, undead, he needed blood to live. He had a reason for his bloodshed, he would starve without it. What reason did Majexatli have? 

If their hunt was just a supplication, a prayer, an offering, then why did they hunger? 

Was devotion making them a monster, or was their piety a justification for the monster they already were?

If they weren’t a monster, if they were truly good, then Majexatli would have been at camp, basking in the victory of the Shadow Curse being lifted, finding what pleasure could be found in the brief moments before they chased the Elder Brain to Baldur’s Gate. 

Kethric Thorm was dead, the Nightsong freed, Thaniel made whole again, Gale alive, Wyll would be free of his contract soon, Jaheira and Minthara had joined their camp. There was a veritable feast around the campfire, endless companionship, if they wanted they could be pulling someone away to somewhere private and chasing whatever pleasure they could.

Instead, they were in the forest, hidden in the shadows, following a trail of blood through the trees, the buzzing euphoria of the hunt dulling the hunger that had dug its claws into them. 

Slaying the young is forbidden.

The brown bear in their sights was full-grown, only slightly larger than Majexatli’s current form, the Dire Wolf they hadn’t let out since the gnolls on the Risen Road. In any other form, it would have been stupid, reckless to take on a bear. It might still be, but they wanted a challenge, wanted to impress. 

A bear claw was one of Malar’s holy symbols.

Make your kills long and bloody.

They jumped from the shadows, snapping at the bear’s hind leg, making sure to bite and tear its flesh enough for the bear's blood to spill on the grass below. They let the bear get a swipe on them, feigned a pained yelp as it spilled their blood in turn, ran off into the trees as though afraid and wounded.

Oh, Majexatli was disappointed when the bear didn’t follow, when it didn’t try to hunt them down in turn, but they could adapt. 

Keeping to the shadows, every so often they purposefully stepped on a twig, just to watch the bear stop in tense silence, sniff the air. In that tense silence, they would dash out, pounce and bite and then run off again before the bear could truly react.

Taste the blood of those you slay and never kill from a distance.

Majexatli shouldn’t have enjoyed it, they knew, but the only thought in their mind was blood. With every snap of their teeth, they relished in the sharp, warm rush of blood in their mouth, as they stalked they lapped at their muzzle and the blood soaking their fur. The promise of more blood, of tearing open flesh, of devouring raw and bloody viscera was intoxicating.

They followed the trail of blood through the trees, stalking, tracking, thrilling at the adrenaline in their veins that kept them warm and warded off the cold breeze. Majexatli let the blood lead them to the edge of a clearing, down to the river’s edge.

The bear was wounded, patches of its fur stained red and glistening in the moonlight. The wounds weren’t grave, bites and claw marks purposefully shallow, just enough to bleed, to distract it, to wear it down. There in the open, there were no twigs or dried foliage to alert the bear to their presence as it licked its wounds on the river bank. 

Crouching in the grass, Majexatli almost felt at home, they could almost forget about the Elder Brain and the Nautiloid. 

They let out a growl as they lunged, managing to knock the bear over as their jaw clamped down on the juncture of its neck, heart jumping and blood singing as they held it there, felt the bear thrash beneath them claws swiping at them blindly, weakly.

And then Majexatli’s blood turned to ice as they felt the fur beneath their teeth fade, muscles reshape and suddenly their teeth were sinking into a person’s flesh, so much more fragile, so easy for the flesh to give. 

The rush of blood in their mouth filled them with terror. They should have released immediately, should have let go of the shoulder as soon as they felt the change, as soon as they heard a cry of pain in a voice so familiar. They should have relaxed their jaw—but why? Did they want to let go and drop wildshape? Or did they want to let go so they could adjust their bite, shift their teeth from shoulder to neck, find the jugular and sink their teeth in—

A strong hand found the scruff of their neck somehow, even as now this form dwarfed the man beneath them. Blunt fingers dug into their fur, into the flesh and muscle there, more gentle than he had any right to be.

“Majexatli,” 

They could feel the vibrations of his chest beneath their teeth, Halsin’s voice slightly strained, yet firm and with none of the hatred Majexatli deserved.

Majexatli’s jaw relaxed, teeth pulling out of flesh and they knew blood was spilling from the wounds. They hadn’t felt any bones snap beneath their teeth, yet their mind raced with images of what they would see when they pulled away, visions of Halsin with his throat torn open, bleeding out before they could do anything. 

A memory surfaced, unbidden, so visceral even 20 years later, how quickly they had bled out, how they had spent those few seconds begging for Silvanus to save them, calling up every prayer they had memorized, every supplication and offering they had given. They had spent every breath striving for the balance Silvanus wanted and he had simply watched their lungs be torn from their chest, as if their slaughter was simply an accepted collateral in his divine plan. 

“Majexatli,”

There was a hand on their face, and it took everything in Majexatli not to snarl and snap at the gentleness.

They couldn’t bring themselves to meet his eyes, instead staring at his shoulder, the tears in his tunic, the bloodstains, the bite marks still lazily oozing blood. He must have cast something, a healing spell to stem the worst of the bleeding and coax the shallowest wounds closed.

“It’s nothing serious,” His voice was so genuine, “I’ve had much worse, it’s alright. We’ve all had moments where we lose ourselves to the beast,”

Halsin let out a slight laugh, but Majexatli could hear a slight pain, the way it was slightly forced, as though he was trying and failing to ignore the Dire Wolf that stood over him. He knew, he had to know that Majexatli could snap his neck with their teeth, that his blood lingered in their mouth. Majexatli wanted to be horrified, disgusted, and they were, but they also wanted to lick their lips and savor the taste.

“Are you alright?”

They finally met his eyes and recoiled, from the concern in his face, from the cautious but naïve trust. He should be running or shifting back to a bear that could snap them in half, they would deserve it.

Majexatli had the upper hand, though, they still had their teeth and claws and as much as the thought of Halsin’s blood on their tongue sickened them, as much as they wanted it to taste foul, the taste was divine. It always was.

They could taste more of it. All they had to do was bite again, all they had to do was let go. Their quarry was beneath them, unarmed, unarmored, the end of the hunt, of their hunger was within reach.

Suffer no druid to live, for they believe not in survival of the strong, but in a weak-minded balance.

Majexatli ran. 

Darting off into the trees, they ignored Halsin’s voice calling after them, blindly zigzagging through the forest as if they were trying to shake someone off their tail. But the beast they were trying to outrun was the one wearing their skin.

They crashed out of wildshape, into the dirt hard enough to skin their knees, their palms, though they could hardly tell their own blood apart from Halsin’s. Curled up on the ground there, they watched as the moonlight filtering through the trees slowly faded and was replaced by sunrise.

If your prey escapes, they have earned their freedom and whatever boon seems fit.

Majexatli didn’t know if there was anything they could give that would make up for what they did. But they weren’t sure if Halsin was the prey or if they were.

[amoeganism]

FIRST KISS pjsk

what ur first kiss was like with the future world star

writing + hc ：crack, mentions of blood, tsukasa tenma is a DUMBASS (affectionate)

TSUKASA TENMA

you hid your mouth with your palm as you let out a long yawn after walking through phoenix wonderland to go home with your bff forever tsukasa. the sun was beginning to set, red and orange hues washing through the stray clouds like strokes of vibrant watercolor as they bled into the purple of night.

it seemed that the blond had just finished a musical solo on stage as his fellow crew members were clapping for him, sitting in the front row of the wonder stage. tsukasa heavily panted, a proud smile on his face while his hand was placed on his chest.

"[name]! you just missed the best part!"

"best part as in you running off tempo like four times?" nene muttered, getting a laugh from you and an faux offended face from tsukasa.

"whoops. i guess i'll have to visit another time and see for myself."

"OH! RIGHT! i haven't even explained to you the plot to this months show!" tsukasa excitedly dragged took your hand and dragged you with a disgusting amount of force ( how the hell did some lame ass like him have this much strength? you don't know ). "so basically, i, prince pegasus the eighteenth of the rainbow kingdom comes face to face with a rebellion from my people because the fairy dust st industry has been failing and very out of character for me, i've done nothing to help. can you believe that?!"

"that must be so humbling for you," you teased. "about time."

"what the hell?! anyway, turns out the head fairy, played by nene, does not have enough musical power to produce fairy dust from her singing because music has been lacking amongst the fairies! and emu, who's part of the rebellion, demands that my royal orchestra play for the fairies and in the end, the kingdoms fairy dust is restored and BAM! happily ever after!"

"goddamn how many plots does rui pull out of his ass?"

"...is that a compliment?" tsukasa blinked.

"don't worry about it," you quickly divert, causing tsukasa's mouth to momentarily open in protest, but quickly close. "you should sing something from the play for me. i want to hear what you guys wrote."

"HAHA! anything for my loyal fan."

"on second thought, i'm leaving."

"wait! stay! i'll sing!" he yelled after you. clearing his through twice before quickly running through a scale to warm up.

the song was a soft ballad, the lyrics written witj poetic artistry, portraying the feelings of a prince with regret. this song seemed to take place during the emotional climax of the play where tsukasa's character snaps out of his arrogant and selfish state of mind, realizing how much his people are suffering and begins to break. you've always admired how well tsukasa portrayed extreme emotions in his acting and if you were any meaner, you'd say he reminds you of those shitty tiktok povs where you have a limited amount of farts or something but being the best friend you are, you kept your mouth shut.

the song came to an end and this time, it was you who had their mouth dropped open.

"holy shit i could make out with your voice right now."

his brain SHORT CIRCUITED

smth up there fried and died right in the moment

my boys eyes went blank and stared at you for a good minute before he literally FLUNG his tall ass body at you and crashed his head into yours

man was in autopilot

you thought you broke your nose

your lips hurt but hey!!! shut up!!! stop complaining!!! future world star is literally kissing(?) you be grateful

but bro he was passionate

eyes squeezed close, sucking the hell out of your lips

he doesn't know how to kiss

tsukasa is not a star, he is a black hole trying to swallow you whole starting from your lips

you were planning to contact true crime podcasts for a new case

he only pulled back after he felt smth warm dripping into the kiss and turns out his nose was bleeding 🧍‍♀️

you laughed in his face

bro was too embarrassed to care and ran away like the pussy he is to shove a tissue up his nostril

dw u kissed him later but properly

tsukasa now has a note in his phone titled "days since i kissed [name] and how idk where our relationship lies: 1"

"i'm impressed you were able to kiss them but not ask them out. that's kinda funny tbh. loser behavior" - rui in the wxs groupchat later

[thatkdpoh]

Introduction i think?

Ok so I’ve been like really excited to do this I don’t know why but this is I think controversy? I don’t know how controversy works but this is how it happened.

I am 12 yrs old, My height is 5,1 and holy shit wanna kms but I am 130 pounds. This will flucate and idk how to spell it but it’s like a line with a dot in the front or end and it goes left to right so I flucate to 130 to 140 I hate that.

How I know about ED/Backstory/rant (cringy ik sorry :c :

I was always a fat kid and I’ve hated it, I understand that I didn’t care about my weight but when I was like what 8 to 9 whenever my dad would say cow to me in taqvaylit I don’t know how to write it but I know something’s like amcic or tizizwith or afkroune which is cat, bee and turtle in that order. I would feel self conscious and sometimes cry to because I’m very sensitive which is like cringy i know lol. My heaviest had to been this year like 140 pounds but I think it was water weight and shit. Anyways my mom tried to get me to fast and she would force me or smth maybe not force but like tried to get me to lose weight. She’d say it directly and it would always make me feel bad but like I understand being 130 for like 8 yrs or 9 to 12 is very heavy and embarrassing considering I always saw kids would be more skinner than me I’d feel very bad. Until recently like last year in 6th grade I was reading fanfics of a human au of TMNT i didnt know what ED’s were so when it showed up the word bulimia I thought it meant bullshit but it didn’t sound right so I searched it up and saw the symptoms that’s when I also learned about anorexia and pica etc. When I saw the symptoms I started copying them now this is the part that I think is controversy I copied the symptoms which I know was bad but I was fucking lazy and still am couldn’t do a workout for the life of me or restrict food, I was used to eating a lot and when I saw the symptoms I copied them and they worked!! I loved it and then the minute I knew how to starve myself, I actually don’t know how to continue with that but I didn’t know how much of a deeper hole I got into but I really loved it and still do EMBARRASING. I did do exercise I did like 100 sit ups a day which did nothing but it did make my body ache and stopped, 5th grade was the worst out of all my grades for now but 6th might be second but it wasn’t that bad just a lot of crying and seeing how fat I am made me cry that’s it. Now if I don’t starve at all or try too I would feel like shit. In 6th grade I also saw that purging was a symptom so I made myself throw up but only if I ate way to fucking much and I’m so bloated it hurts and I can’t take the pressure so I throw up just to take off a little pressure and go back but then I’d feel sick which sucked :C. When Ramandan came though I was A BEAST not an actual beast but like it was my oppertuinity to fast without anyone questioning because I live in a studio apartment with 5 other people that are my family >_<. Obviously with my blabber mouth which I hate told everything to my mom but I think she thinks that I’m ok now :D. Any way I’d only eat 5 tablespoons of soup every night and I was very tired and I lost 6 pounds!! Which isn’t a lot but I made it to 124 pounds!! But then I gained it all back in summer break, cried, tried to fast for 3 days but fainted on the 36 hour?? I’m not sure because when I stopped the fast because my mom told me to eat and spoiler alert I cried cause I have little bitchitas if u know Kubz scouts u know. I paused at the 38 hour so like 36 is my highest to fast which is embarrassing again. ANYWAY NOW IM IN 7TH GRADE STUGGLIJG EITH THIS THINGY :]] I sound like those I guess I deserve it heh thing but like no I’m not seriously I just wanted to be silly. Anyway I’m gonna try that ABC diet which I think seems kind of mid to hard but I think fitnesspal would help me with it <33

BYE EVERYONE HAVE A GREAT DAY OR NIGHT HAVE A GREAT THANKSGIVING SND MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! :33

[crescenthoax]

I can’t lie and so sorry if this ends up being really long and rambly but I was v surprised when you said you didn’t expect anyone to care about Floris and Aemond’s relationship, to me, they were almost enigmatic as a couple. While ofc as the main pairing Aegon/Annika (❤️) get the focus I felt like Willa and Daeron had more of an overtly loving relationship (Like that sort of proposal?? MY HEART. THOSE BABIES.) While Aemond and Floris had been around in the story for a long time, they seemed to have one where they seemed to operate as partners rather than a couple. Like i remember when it was revealed that Floris was pregnant I was like “THEY HAD SEX?!” I still shipped them ofc and like when they got reunited I was like “omfg just kiss her!” but I was convinced in my head fsr that was like all building up to some sort of catalyst or smth! I had expected that with the Alys stuff that it would be like really revealing in that way for them. I’m really excited to meet your Alys. Anyway so sorry for rambling 😭 I really loved Floris in which we mostly saw her through Annika’s eyes and their relationship; it pains me to know we won’t see them together again.

Since she’s gone, I do want to ask how Aemond actually thought about her? Did he love her? Was there problems between them? I’m sooo excited to see his next POV bc holy shit the trauma 😭

No don’t worry because I LOVE when you guys rumble about the story it makes my heart go wooshhhh. I love rambling about it too! ♥️

I suppose I didn't think anyone would care about them because I actually never thought anyone would read the story at all, let alone like it😭 I always wanted to make it very pro-green and when I started planning it back in october I was still writing my other Aemond fic and people always complained about how much they hated how green centric was so I thought well I’m probably gonna get so much hate with this one (it wasn’t the case at all and I’m still shocked abt it). Most of the fics I found about Aemond back then while not necessarily bad, always had him betraying his family at some point, and I had never encountered a story that humanized their side. It seemed to me that Aemond was always mischaracterized; I always saw him as a very complex guy when it came to feelings and relationships. In my head, if Aemond were to love someone romantically, I never thought of him as someone who would enjoy pda or made a big deal out of his feelings. I think of him as serious and very reserved person, the opposite of Aegon who I see as more likely to have flamboyant relationships, being more hypersexual and unable to keep his hands off his partner.

I think that, in my story, that's the Aemond I wanted to portrait and the Aemond I also needed. He is kinda mad and cold, but he’s a man who cares deeply for his loved ones and shows it by doing everything he can to protect them rather than with actual words. He's a man whose love comes from duty, which I find interesting considering the famous phrase we all know, “love is the death of duty,” because I believe it's the opposite for him. He loves Floris, in his own way, because he learned to love her. Because that's what he must do. And he cares about his family, and since Floris arrived he's been a support for all of them, especially for the children. Besides, she saw him throughout his grief for Helaena while supporting his mother and the children because she's a dutiful person. I still feel like they're companions, they complement each other perfectly because they're opposites (I've already said the best way I can describe them is that she's sweet where he's bitter), and unlike Annika and Aegon, they have clear priorities and duties that they put above their feelings and needs. And yes, they did have sex haha, I just think Aemond has a lot on his mind beyond sex (there's a lot of baggage there for him too), and their relationship isn't necessarily the most physical. But they do have chemistry. And he allows himself to be gentle to her than to anyone else. With Daeron and Willa, it's simpler because they're the definition of puppy love.

To sum it up, yes, he did love her. And he will mourn her and we are going to see all of it because man do I love writing about grief🥳

[holmes-cringe-compilation]

hello! hope you're doing well!! could i request some h/cs for sherlock (my beloved) his s/o tells him "i love you" for the first time, but almost unconsciously? like he's doing one of his silly deductions or smth and s/o is just so smitten, they get this dreamy look and it just slips out? thank you very much <3

a/n: hi anon ! this prompt was soooo cute and i loved writing it so thank you for requesting ! also i'm just gonna assume that ryuu is sick with a cold or smth so that's why sherlock's deducting on his own but anyways, i hope you enjoy !

sherlock's s/o telling him they love him for the first time

the first time you're about to see sherlock's theatre of logic and reason you get excited because you've heard so much about it ! you've built up a lot of anticipation and expectations for his deductions and so far with every small scale deduction he makes is enough to make you swoon.

so when he insinuates that now is the time for his more big scale deduction and problem solving, you get goosebumps all over and eagerly wait for the theatrics to begin with wide eyes.

sherlock notices how excited you look and smirks, adding a small wink to the start of his theatre of logic and reason, making you smile all goofily even before he starts digging at this person's lies and inconsistencies.

upon starting, sherlock seems a lot more confident in his words and literally everything (like even his movements are more flamboyant, dancing around like a kid on a sugar high) all because you, his s/o is watching him deduce the truth out of this situation.

maybe he even gets everything right in this deduction because of your wide and pretty eyes instead of just getting half of the nonsense things he says ! he sometimes has no filter on and works on autopilot in my opinion but with you watching he has to think more critically than he already does (#letsherlockbefullyrightforonce).

every deduction he makes he adds more of a flare to, building up the conclusion to a certain theory he has and as soon as he finishes a deduction it makes you gasp a little in realisation like holy shit he's right ! i didn't notice that yet he.. he's so smart ! just like in the books !

"your gaze brings us straight to the answer. it's very easy to tell when someone is lying by just looking at their eyes." sherlock puffs out his chest in confidence as he looks at you for approval, and you, starry eyed give him a grin and thumbs up. it only boosts his majorly inflated ego more as he adds more oomph to his words.

you've read about the man's deductions in the newspapers. he always ended up in them after a case was solved since he always has these extravagant theatrics like the one you were watching including the exchange student and lawyer ryuunosuke naruhodou. although ever since ryuu got a cold he had to deduce things on his own. it was a bit boring and he hoped his little partner in justice recovered quickly.

however ! this feeling was soon replaced with the thought of "i have to impress y/n with my skills as a detective !" and "i have to be the smartest bitch in this crime scene." one of which may not be directly from sherlock but i think would be funny to come from him teehee.

after finishing the funny and entertaining theatrics, sherlock is more tired than ever, but he can't tell you that, not yet at least ! he walks his merry way to your giddy from excitement self, puffed out chest and adrenaline pumping through his body like wildfire.

"well ? what'd you think of that one ?" sherlock chuckles, smirking as he flicked up the rim of his deerstalker, a hand on his hip.

".... i love you." you're in a dreamy state despite looking physically excited and ready to shoot off into space. your head was in cloud nine and as soon as sherlock heard you mutter those words the sluggishness wracking up his body temporarily leaves him as he continues to smirk, knowing that you really loved his deductions.

"now that's something i wasn't expecting." was it getting hot in here or was that his face ? if you weren't surrounded by officers then sherlock would give you kisses all over your face.

then you realised, did you just say that ? you thought you were thinking in your head but apparently your thoughts were too loud for your head that you spilled the beans. "oh ! i didn't mean to.. say that out loud.. i just thought your deductions were top notch and seeing you in action made me think about how much i.. l-love you." you stuttered out, blushing a tad.

sherlock stifled a laugh in case people would continue to stare at his eccentric self and instead let out a chuckle. "i love you too, y/n." and after letting out a wink to you, you felt your face burn up in flushed feelings.

[souljoon]

hey i love your writing its amazing!! would you mind writing smth i thought abt while i was showering lolll. what if the reader was singing in the shower and corpse had no idea she could sing and when she comes out he likes is so in awe of it and he asks her to sing for him. it could end however you would like lol. (maybe corpse could ask the reader to sing on a song for him) idk do with this what you will sorry for making this so long and detailed lol

thank you for your lovely request! :) i hope you like this one, anon. sorry for the delay btw. i work full time and only have the time to write down stuff at night in bed lol 😅

pairing: bf!corpse x reader genre: fluff warning/s: cursing

~~~

Corpse was currently streaming. And for a while, you stayed there watching him while you sat comfortably on his lap before deciding to leave alone in peace. Admittedly, you’re a great form of distraction during his streams. But he loves having you around, loves making you impressed with his skills, loves listening to your laugh every now and then.

The room was semi-dark, so when he heard a phone rang just as its screen lit up, he right away located where the source—your phone was.

He was supposed to ignore the call since he was in the middle of the game. However, on the third ring, he was forced to retrieve your phone, and bring it to you in case the purpose of the call is important.

He went straight to the bedroom he shares with you, only to find the bed empty. Lights on, bathroom door closed. His forehead crumples at the sound coming from there muffled by the shut door.

He twists the door, poking his head inside. Instinctively, he pressed the red button on your screen, quickly getting rid of the noise. And as quick as he let himself in, his eyes went round.

Holy fuck!

Your back is on him, your palms gliding on your arms, your chest—all over as the running water washes all traces of soap off of you.

Is that your voice he’s actually listening to right now?

Despite the unfamiliarity to your song choice, he couldn’t help but be left amazed. Heavens, he needs to listen to more of you like this—Corpse’s mouth parted, jaw hanging low as his eyes gleam in pure fascination.

His stomach is fluttering, and he could literally just feel the pulls of his heartstrings with his ears drowning from your achingly sweet voice. A stark contrast to his own, yet he realized right there and then he wouldn’t tire of listening to you sing all day, everyday for the rest of his life.

He has a distinct music taste. He doesn’t particularly like mainstream music but that doesn’t mean he can’t appreciate good vocals when he hears one. Especially one coming from his girlfriend.

It’s no secret that you and him share the same love for music despite having different music preferences. But unlike him, you’ve always been clear about your interest in music as a consumer rather than making one so he assumed that you don’t sing, or even consider that you have beautiful vocals. Nonetheless, it wouldn’t matter to him. No flaw of yours could possibly change the fact that he loves you.

You, there inside the shower cubicle, seemed like a singing angel sent from above—a feisty one.

The more he listens to your voice bouncing in the enclosed area with the rhythmic sound of the streaming water as it collides against the tiled floor—a heavenly match, must he add, the harder it is for him to leave you there.

He didn’t want to pass up the chance to listen to more of this discovery but he also wouldn’t intentionally want to make you uncomfortable by the thought of you being watched without your knowledge. The realization prompted him to leave the bathroom, at last, only to stand there before the door.

So when you finally opened the door, you jumped lightly at the sight of him there as if he was particularly waiting for you.

“How long have you been standing there?” You asked, confused and even more puzzled when you caught the glimmer in his eyes.

“Long enough. You have some explaining to do, you little minx.” He spoke. If only he wasn’t visibly starstruck for a reason you were not aware of, you would’ve taken him seriously.

You frown, “What— do you mean? What d-did I do?”

Corpse pulled you closer by your arm, until you were literally flushed against him. He breathes heavily in on your neck.

“Babe-”

“I didn’t know you could sing,” he suddenly mentions.

“Oh! Yeah. Were you listening to me in the shower?” You laugh, nervously. “It’s not that of a big deal, babe.”

“It is, for me. Considering you have such a beautiful voice.” His nose travels upward, hovering just below the shell of your ear. “So perfect. I think I’ve fallen in love with it— if that’s even possible. Can you sing for me, baby?”

You stepped back, blood rushing quickly on your cheeks by his overwhelming compliment. “You’re being too kind just because I’m your girlfriend. I’m not even that good,”

It’s not that you hid your talent from him. There’s just no right opportunity to say that to him without actually getting embarrassed.

He chuckled, deeply. “Oh baby, I can die happily just by merely listening to your voice.”

Your face profusely reddens, not believing you’re actually hearing this from him—except that his expression solidifies his words. You’ve never seen him this mesmerized, heart eyes emoji personified.

He cups your face, forcing you to see his awe-filled eyes. “Come on, don’t be shy now,”

“Fine. But only if you let me play on your computer for a day.”

The expression on his face slowly vanishes. “You can sit on my lap while I stream?” Corpse tries, but you were already stepping out of his grasp to the closet.

Corpse pouts, crossing his arms over his chest as he follows toward your little trail like a lost puppy, determined to have his wish granted.

~~~

[akakeiiji]

Iwaizumi Bokuto Ushijima and Kageyama reacting to their s/o calling them a cute pet name for the first time?

Omg nonnie this request was so adorable, I had so much fun writing them 💕🥺

-`,✎ Iwaizumi, Bokuto, Ushijima and Kageyama’s reaction to you calling them pet names

Iwaizumi Hajime

He would turn beet red and whip his head towards you in an instant, his mouth hanging open and his eyes wide

He didn’t expect it at all

“Wait…did you just call me…”

He’d actually be so shy about it at first, it would just fluster him so much

Not many things can get to Iwaizumi like this so it truly was a sight to see

If you tease him he will explode from mixed embarrassment and giddiness

He’d be blushing the whole day, a smug smile on his face the entire time

He never thought he’d like being called cute little pet names before, he probably thought they were cringey or embarrassing or smth thanks oikawa but when you use them it doesn’t seem like that at all

He warms up to the cute names immediately and his heart always skips a beat whenever you use them on him

It takes him a while for him to use pet names on you and when he first did he was so stiff and shy he’s so adorable please i can’t

He gets used to it really quickly though and regularly uses them with you but only if you’re in private!!

Oikawa would never let him hear the end of it if he knew so he likes to keep it only between you two 

His favorite time to use pet names is when he’s greeting you in the morning or saying goodbye to you when you’re alone, he just loves how sweet and intimate it is

He’d take ahold of your hands and kiss your forehead as he say “Good morning, love.” or something like that and now im soft please my heart cant handle this

Bokuto Koutarou

“Wait what did you say?”

“I said baby can you pass me the milk—”

“HOLY SHIT YOU CALLED ME WIUFEAJHFVAWEHFU”

He would freak out, to say the least

He always uses pet names with you ever since the beginning of your relationship (and even beforehand tbh)

But he never pushes you to do the same, he probably doesn’t even realize it at first

Which was why it took him completely by surprise when you did and why he was so ridiculously happy

He’d probably scoop you up in his arms and twirl you around from the sheer happiness he was feeling

He’d also smother you with little kisses all over your face

He would immediately tell (read: gloat) all his friends about it because this is such a special moment for him

After you start using pet names on him, the number of times that he does practically triples 

If he can find a way to sneak a nickname or pet name in he definitely can and will do it no matter the context or situation 

Whenever you call him using your usual pet names a grin always finds itself on his face and he always gets a little bit more excited every time you do, the effect never wears off no matter how long its been

Ushijima Wakatoshi

He’s the most nonchalant of the group, his reaction is almost unnoticable

When you first used your pet name on him he froze a bit and blinked a few times as he processed what you just said

He’d turn and ask you to repeat yourself in case he misheard and when you did he’d just tilt his head in confusion

“Why do you need to call me that? Why not just call me Wakatoshi like usual?”

HE DOESN’T GET THE CONCEPT OF USING PET NAMES IM SORRY DKJEHBV

Once you explain it to him though he’s surprisingly pretty down with it

He doesn’t mind it when you call him pet names, even when other people are around and after a while, he grows really fond of them

Once he truly understands the appeal he’ll start calling you pet names as well and it’s literally the sweetest because he always says them in such a sweet genuine tone and you can feel his love just from a simple pet name and can you tell that im simping so hard for ushijima rn bc i am and efjbewhbfw  

Again he probably doesn’t mind using or being called pet names even with other people around it doesn’t fluster him at all

He doesn’t feel the need to hide that aspect of his life from others, he loves you, he doesn’t mind other people knowing it as well 

To be honest the people he’s with would be the flustered ones because Ushijima would seem like the last person to use such cute little nicknames 

But surprise surprise, he does and he loves them so much 

Basically what I’m saying is Wakatoshi is baby and I love him

Kageyama Tobio

My little tsundere baby

His reaction would be similar to Iwaizumi’s bc asides from oikawa, iwa was totally kag’s role model but with more confused screaming

“WHAT–WAIT—DON’T CALL ME THAT—”

He’d scream stuff like this but he’d be bright red and cover his face with his hands because he’s so embarrassed and flustered

Nobody has ever called him pet names before so it was totally new for him

The effect that that one little pet name had on him would last an entire day, he’d be bright red the entire time as he kept going back to the memory of you calling him that

He really really loves them

But he just panics every time you use them

It’ll take him a while to stop short-circuiting and yelling at first but slowly he starts getting used to them but he’ll always get a little bit flustered or red every time 

But if you use them in front of other people he will die from embarrassment and want the earth to open up and eat him alive so only use them when you two are alone

Seeing as it’ll take him a while to get used to just being called pet names, it’s not a surprise that it’ll take him some time to use them on you as well

The first few attempts were a failure because he’d just stand in front of you beet-red and looking constipated because no matter what he did he couldn’t utter out the pet name

But once he gets into his groove he surprisingly uses them very often, it’s actually super friggin cute

[collecting-stories]

Fangs - Rafe Cameron

Request: Could I request smth where the reader and Rafe are having like a secret casual fling, but then Rafe admits he's catching feelings and the reader tells him that she's in love with John B (her best friend)

Request: Can I request a Rafe fic based on Matt Champion - Fangs , or Cocaine by Pink Sweat$ 🥺🤲🏻 whichever one inspires you more to write

A/N: Since Reputation is a similar storyline I thought I would change up the outcome...also...a smidgen of smut (it’s not my forte so I apologize in advance if its the worst thing you’ve ever read.)

Outer Banks Masterlist

///

The curtains were still drawn, just a hint of sunlight peeking through as you sat on the bed, tying your bikini top. On the other side of the door you could hear Rose Cameron’s shrill voice bossing around the maid. Inside the room it was still mostly dark, chilled from the air conditioning, the comforter was mussed up on the bed, pushed away from your side. You had your shorts in hand and grabbed your shirt from the floor. Keys, phone, wallet, all sat on the nightstand next to a pink bong.  

Behind you, on the other side of the bed, someone groaned. You looked back over your shoulder as Rafe pushed the comforter away from his face, hair mussed. His fringe hung in his eyes as he yawned and looked over at you.  

“Hey, you leaving?” He asked, watching as you tied your hair back.  

“Yeah.” You nodded, standing up. The cool composure you worked so hard on falling into place. Rafe sat up, scooting toward your side of the bed as he leaned back against the headboard. “I’ll text you later?”

“Okay.” He looked a little lost in the morning and you knew it had everything to do with last night.  

If it had been before or even in the heat of the moment you could’ve easily ignored it. Written him off as trying to get you there or just being a little too far gone. But it wasn’t either of those things. He’d said it as he came down. With his weight on you, sweaty in too warm bedroom, he’d kissed you a little longer than usual and told you he loved you.  

You’d chosen to ignore it, at least you pretended too. But the words were there at the forefront of your brain the entire night. Nothing you did made you feel more restful. You knew what you should’ve done. You should’ve pulled on your clothes right then, told him you were cutting things off, and left.  

“We’re not gonna-”

“I’d rather not, Rafe.” You replied, grabbing your phone to check it. A text from Kiara asking if you’d heard from John B. According to your phone it was later in the morning than you’d thought it was. “I told you-”

“Casual, yeah I know.” He nodded, “it doesn’t feel casual though.”

“Please, Rafe, don’t do this.” You stressed.  

“You’ve been here every night this week. You can’t act like that doesn’t mean something.” He said, moving so that he was at the edge of the bed, grabbing your hands. You didn’t pull away immediately, staring down at your hands intertwined with his.

You’d been adamant that this thing you were doing was only casual. And that hadn’t been an issue for Rafe in the beginning, or at all, until last night. And now you were wondering how long he had been catching feelings for you.  

“Yeah,” you shrugged, “I like having sex with you.”  

“Baby,” Rafe pulled you down onto his lap. He kissed along your neck and shoulder and you moved your head to the side to give him more access.  

You tried to ignore the way his fingers ran along your thigh. “Don’t Rafe,” you wanted to say that you didn’t want to do this, to have to end things because he was getting too emotionally involved. But then you would have to admit that maybe you wanted to continue because you were that involved too. 

The hand around your back brushed along your side, fingers grazing the edge of your bikini top. You gripped your clothes tighter as his other hand pressed against the inside of your thigh. It was a silent request for access, one you were too familiar with by now. That should have been the warning sign, the pressure against your thigh should have woken you out of the trance that seemed to enclose Rafe’s bedroom but instead your other leg went slack, falling off his lap, your foot stabilizing you as you opened up for him. 

Eyes closed, the sensation of him drowned out any thoughts that had been weighing you down. His hands were warm against your skin and you shifted on his thigh as his fingers slipped passed your bikini bottoms. You always wore bathing suits to his house under the guise that you had just literally been swimming but usually it was simply because it was easier to pull a string than to both taking off clothes. 

“Holy shit Rafe,” you stuttered, grabbing his forearm as his middle finger circled your clit. His other hand moved up to your throat as he placed kisses along your shoulder. Somehow he’d managed to manipulate your body so you were straddling one of his thighs, facing the door to his bedroom. With your back against his chest, his grip on your neck tightened just enough that you could feel the pressure of his fingers on your throat at the same time he pressed against your clit. You jerked forward, breath catching from lack of air. 

“What’s the matter baby?” His lips brushed against your ear as he spoke. 

You inhaled, nails scratching at his forearm as he continued to play with your clit, middle finger brushing against the bundle of nerves so delicately it was barely a touch. But you knew what he was doing. You were always hypersensitive in the morning and he knew it. 

His grip on your neck loosened as he slipped his middle finger inside of you and your toes curled around the carpeting. “Please, Rafe.” Your voice sounded far off. 

“Does that feel good?”

You nodded, head bobbing against his shoulder. He pressed his thumb against your clit and you whimpered at the sudden pain it caused.

“That’s not an answer baby.” 

Rafe was nothing if not a control freak and you liked the idea of someone else taking over. You let him be as controlling and possessive and needy as he wanted. 

“I’m waiting.” He moved his thumb, gentle circles still enough to cause spasms. You weren't sure if you were already halfway there or still having aftershocks from the night before. 

“Fuck, yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes, It feels good,” you breathed out, rewarded by him beginning to move his finger in and out, he added another, stretching you just enough. You weren’t just hypersensitive you were still sore from him last night and you could only handle so much. “You always know how to make me feel good.” 

You felt Rafe smile against your neck. There was nothing he loved more than praise. And he certainly deserved it.

-

“I’ll call you later, I promise.”

“I’m going to the club later with Topper and Kelce if you wanna come by.” He offered.   

Part of your agreement with Rafe was that you didn’t hang out in public. It was one of the first things that you had proposed when you started this casual thing, that no one could know what was going on with the two of you. Especially not considering who your friends were. If John B or any of the pogues found out that you had even looked in Rafe’s direction you would be excommunicated. Having sex with him was out of the question.  

You heard yourself say maybe instead of no and you kissed him even though you knew it wasn’t a good idea. Once you were gone Rafe laid back down, burying his head in his pillow and groaning. He seriously regretted telling you that he was falling in love with you and that he wanted this to be more than sex. But now that he had told you he couldn’t stop thinking about it. He knew why this started, because you didn’t think the guy you liked was interested in you.  

It had been a blow to the gut last night when you admitted to him that you were in love with John B. Of all the people in the Outer Banks you had chosen that smart ass pogue to be in love with. He’d kept his cool though.  

“You’re taking this a lot better than I thought you would.” You had remarked as you on his bed with him the night before.

“You can tell me how in love you are with John B but I don’t see you fucking him.”  

“Rafe-”

“It doesn’t matter alright.” Rafe had sworn that he didn’t care that you claimed you were in love with John B, you were there with him. You’d gone to the party last night to see him, not John B and when you went home it wasn’t with John B.  

But he couldn’t deny that he hated seeing you leave in the morning, knowing that you were going to find your pogue friends and pretend like nothing had ever happened between the two of you. He wanted this to be more than secret texts and meeting up at night so no one would see you together. He wanted to take you out during the day and actually show up with you at a party, not just watch you from across the room.  

You had told you were in love with John B because you had been in love with him since sixth grade. Always too chicken to tell him how you felt, you were hopelessly in love with your best friend and hated anyone that occupied his attention. It was at a party, when you saw him chatting with some touron, that you got drunk and had sex with Rafe for the first time. Now it felt like all the time and you didn’t need to think about John B smiling at some other girl to get you in Rafe’s bed. It was enough for Rafe to text you and tell you that he missed you or that he was thinking about you. And you knew what that meant but you didn’t want to think about it.

-

The vallet at the club let you through when you told him you were there to see Rafe Cameron. You’d never been to the club before though Rafe had invited you a few times. It was always meaningless because you both knew that you would never go there, that was too public. If anyone saw you with him there was no explaining to your friends what you were doing with him.  

He was outside at the golf counter with Topper and Kelce and you hung back, waiting for him to notice you watching them. When he did, he passed his club off to Kelce and walked over to you, weaving through tables and chairs. This was it, you thought as he approached you. This was it. He stopped in front of you, ready to ask what you were doing there because sure, he had invited you, but seeing you actually there was surreal. He didn’t get the chance to ask though as you kissed him. You grabbed his shirt and kissed him without warning.  

Rafe’s eyes went wide. Before he could kiss you back you were pulling away.  

“I lied.” You admitted.

You didn’t tell him that you’d gone looking for John B that afternoon when he didn’t show up to hang out like he was supposed to. That you’d seen him on the dock kissing Sarah. You had stood there on the deck staring at them kissing and realized that you felt nothing. You weren’t mad, you weren’t so upset you thought you might burst into tears like you had at that party months ago. You were completely indifferent. It felt like watching strangers kiss, it meant nothing to you and you knew why. Because you had told Rafe that you were in love with John B and you wanted casual only but you were lying.  

“Lied about what?” He asked, still feeling dazed by your actions.

“I’m not in love with John B.” You replied, the words sounding foreign to your brain. You’d dedicated so much of your life and energy to the unrequited crush you had on your best friend, “I don’t want this to just be casual.”

Rafe licked his lips and grinned. He imagined that Topper and Kelce were watching, trying to figure out what was going on. He was too far into this to care about their opinions. “You wanna get out of here?”

“Isn’t the point of me telling you I wanna be public that we...ya know, are public?”  

“Right now I just want you to myself.”

-

taglist: @maplelattes22 @poguesrforlife  @freckled-and-daydreaming  @chasefreakinstokes @millie-753 @fangirlwithme @alex12948 @howdyherron @katherine097 @tangledinsparkles @tragicmisfits @carbonated-beverage @mariofgreengables @damonsalvawhore27 @ssprayberrythings @dopedoodes @dolanfivsosxox 

[justkpopjokes]

Found You || OnlineRival!Felix

AU: online gamer friends + college + rivals to lovers

Anon: know it's a common au cliché but I've been craving some college au's of felix, maybe enemies to lovers ?? but enemies in a playful, competitive sense of course. I'll leave this vague so that you have more creative freedom, idc if you write in para. style or bullet point, I'll eat up anything you write skskj

A/N: I HAVE RETURNED!! Hope you enjoy this anon~ still can’t believe you’ve been following me since 2017 oml

If anyone else has lowkey specific requests for skz I’ll take them!! It can be any type/medium(?) of writing lol I just don’t want to write elaborate plots rn

You’ve been playing this video game recently

(I’ve been playing Valorant lol so I’m basing this off of that)

you’ve been playing solo for a bit

One afternoon, you match with a nice team that’s doing well

it’s a good game; you’re pretty evenly matched

you end up the last player standing, win a round for your team, & they applaud you for it!

But then—ohoho and then—

—you hear the deepest freakin Australian accent on voice chat

saying “ayy nice!!”

you say a polite thank you back to him

meanwhile the other people on your team are like

“holy crap bro your voice is low af!”

you get to hear this boy speak for longer lol

His username is #1Aboji or BrownieBoi915 or smth idk so you call him Brownie

and y’all get to talking lol

you send him a friend request on a whim because he seems nice

he accepts, sends you a party invite, and you play a few games together!!

Over the course of a couple months, you play together every time you’re online at the same time

(which is often bc ur timezones happen to be the same hehe)

It’s funny because although you’re friendly with each other, you’re competitive af LMAO

most of your games are spent competing for who can get more kills and who can be MVP of the team/entire match

it’s friendly competition but competition nonetheless

eventually he asks for your Tumblr/Twitter/whatever so y’all can chat a bit more :D

his @ can still be @/BrownieBoi915 lol

Brownie’s fun and you share some interests!!

your music tastes are similar too, so he sends you song recommendations, then you yell about them

You’ve been chatting a lot and reply to each others’ posts/tweets often, especially when you’re just posting about weird sh!t happening in your life

But one day… you post about something that happened at your college

something like “icb this ajlsdhf there’s this girl in one of my classes and she just sCALED THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING SO SHE WOULDN’T BE LATE TO CLASS”

less than a minute later you get a text:

“AHJKFLDSA WAIT YOUR MOST RECENT TWEET—

DO YOU MEAN VANESSA??”

and then

wAIT THAT’S BROWNIE TEXTING

HE KNOWS VANESSA?!?!?

So, naturally, you text him back

Then Brownie gets you to agree to another silly competition:

see who could identify the other first on campus!!

the 1 rule is that you have to find each other in-person

(there is a 2nd rule that you can’t ask exactly where the other person is, but that’s pretty obvious lol)

But because of the main rule, occasionally you’ll get a vague text like

Brownie: “Hey are you wearing a red flannel right now”

You: “No I’m not even outside lmao”

Brownie: “Dammit I thought I felt the vibes”

It’s a nice lil challenge because the only thing you know about Brownie is that he identifies as a guy and has an Australian accent

(but that may be unimportant depending on where you live lmao)

meanwhile the only things he knows about you are random details, your voice, and that you have a class with Vanessa lol

And it’s FUN!!

but you both start to get suuuuper competitive

mostly because of the 1 rule

there have literally been times you’ve probably found Brownie when you hear an Australian accent in the distance

however he always leaves before you can get to him, so it doESN’T COUNT GDI

Brownie tho lmao—he’s always putting on his detective hat and trying to track you down on campus

whenever he’s chilling after class he asks for where you are generally

he’ll ask you “Hey wyd”

You: “Studying”

Brownie: “In the library?”

You: “…Yes”

then he starts to narrow down where you could be based on less-specific questions

Of course, that’s not the only thing you text him about

you’ve grown pretty close to Brownie

the competition has helped with that!!

and ofc you still play that game together lol

Honestly, you really want to meet him

he’s just super charming + considerate

Also he mentioned he likes baking

you suggested “we should bake together!!”

Brownie: “Gotta find me first ;)))”

so,,, yeah you daydream about baking with Brownie

you really want to know his name

I mean, c’mon, you’ve gotten his phone number at this point, but you still can’t find him??

it’s starting to get frustrating

to the point where he can hear the frustration through your texts

HIS NAME IS FELIX!!

YOU HAVE A NAME TO WORK OFF OF NOW!!!!

That small piece of information motivates you for the rest of the week

you give Felix your name in return, but he insists that neither of you should ask around for each other

(you can’t ask your friends if they know someone named Felix

but if you hear someone say “Felix” while you’re out and about, that works)

you’re still unable to find him for some time, but knowing Felix’s name makes you feel closer to him

You can’t video call Felix but you normally call him at least once a week

after knowing him for at least half a year, you get this warm feeling in your chest every time his name pops up on the top of your phone

One of your phone calls sounds something like this:

Felix: “Hey, y/n?”

You: “Yes?”

Felix: “Do you want to go out for lunch? I mean, once we find each other.”

You: “As in a date?”

Felix: “Yeah—I mean, if that’s okay!”

You: “Yes please!! So can you find me already istg 🙄”

Felix is itching to meet you too

…so he sends you a selfie

with a filter though! that way you don’t see his entire face

you send him 1 in return (also with a filter)

Felix immediately says “aww ur cute uwu”

and your heart m e l t s

you’d think, hey maybe that’ll help me find him

SPOILERS it doesn’t really help lmao

Your close friends really want to help lmao because they’ve been hearing about this “Brownie” boy you like

however, you & Felix are adamant of winning this competition because the person who wins doesn’t need to pay for your 1st lunch date lol

It’s the last Friday afternoon before you have a week-long holiday, when you’re hanging out in front of one of your friend’s classes to pick them up

you’re standing outside the building chatting with one of your other friends when your phone starts ringing in your pocket

other friend is like “ooOOOH is it brownie boy??”

You: “Oh yeah rip he’s probably calling because I missed some of his texts, give me a moment."

You’re about to pick up when the call drops

so you’re like ?? bruh what and are about to unlock your phone to see what Felix’s texts are about

That’s when you feel a tap on your shoulder

and a low Australian voice behind you says your name

your head whips around to find this cute face with freckles and a giant smile on his face

“Felix?!?”

“Heh, I found you~”

Dude doesn’t hesitate to hug you, pick you up, then spin you around

your friend is watching with a goofy smile but he doesn’t care

after he finally puts you down, you cup his face with both your hands

“The filters always hide your freckles… they’re like stars, Lix”

instead of a lunch date, Felix takes you out for dinner :DD

even though you lost he insists on paying :’))

your friends don’t even care that you’re ditching them ajlkfdhs they literally push you away to go eat with Felix lmao

and you return home with that warm feeling in ur heart still there

needless to say, he will arrange another date so he can bring you some homemade brownies

he is the brownie boy after all!!

[sachirou-senpai]

HI BBY💕💕!! i heard u just started this account so i’m gonna request smth to start u off!! 😚😚 recently i’ve been really stressed and falling behind work :( so is it alright if u write headcanons or scenarios on how haikyuu boys (any of ur preference!!) would comfort u after a long day of online school?? LUV U BBY ,, don’t feel obliged to write this if u don’t feel like it okk!

Hinata Shouyou

→ B E S T B O Y → kinda confused? cause all he does on a stressful school day is play volleyball → after and then he's fine so like,,,, he's kinda clueless → absolutely tries his best though → "Um, do you need snacks? Water? Umm, we could go play volleyball?" → Yes he just asked if you wanted to play volleyball after a long day of online school → I mean to be fair that's all he really knows, sleep, eat, volleyball, school, volleyball, eat, sleep → so like he's trying his best

+

"Hey, what's up? Are you okay?"

Shouyou had just come over on a whim, he was bored at home and wanted to say hi! He didn't expect to see you face down on your couch, looking rather beat up.

"Just a long day of school, it's just gotten to be so much, y'know? I'm really falling behind and it's stressing me out."

"Oh, I'm sorry, can I help?" He rapidly starts listing off things he could do to help you, getting more and more excited as he goes along.

"Snacks! No, water? What about candy? Oh, Kageyama always likes milk! What about those popsicles Noya-senpai always likes so much?! Oh wait! I know! Let's play volleyball! C'mon!"

He literally starts dragging you out the door until he sees the rather nonplussed look on your face.

"Oh, did you not want to play volleyball? I probably should have checked first," he says, rather embarrassed of himself.

"No Shou, I just want to spend time with you. Come cuddle with me?"

"Of course! C'mon, let's go, I wanna hold you. Or do you wanna hold me? Maybe we could hold each other. Hmmm, so many choices. We could build a pillow fort." He slowly trails off as he drags you down the hall. Your boyfriend might be a bit enthusiastic sometimes, but you honestly wouldn't trade it for the world.

→ lowkey cuddle king → yes you made a pillowfort → u fall asleep in his arms

Tendou Satori

→ Tendou high-key has a habit of just walking in to your house sometimes completely unannounced → you're not even sure how he gets up the creaky stairs of your apartment without you noticing, but really that's a story for another time → you're also not sure how he gets in because you're sure you keep the door locked → (you have a spare key you gave him a while ago you've absolutely forgotten about and he thinks it's funny so you're never gonna find out) → sometimes it annoys you that he just, comes over? without asking? → but today you're honestly kinda grateful to see him even if you were in a pissy mood, because Boyyyy are you Tired → it's not that your teachers were especially brutal, you had just been really stressed out recently and had started falling behind with your work → and you were soooo tired → and soooooooo done → you honestly just wanted to curl up and fall asleep and then wake up and all your assignments would be done and school would be over

+

"Hiyaaaa babyyy!" He calls into your apartment.

"Holy shit Satori you scared me! Could you like, not?" you snapped, instantly regretting it. "Ugh, sorry babe," you said, putting your face in your palms, elbows resting on your desk.

"Oh, love, don't worry about it, what's wrong? You can tell me."

"Iss stupid," you mumbled.

"Now now baby, no it isn't. Nothing that's bothering you is stupid, I promise. Now tell me, what's up?" He says, coming over to you and putting a hand on your back, holding you close.

You sigh, a big sigh and finally let all your pent-up feelings out.

"Just schoolwork. I feel like there's just so much! My teachers didn't really even assign that much this week, but I just feel so overwhelmed. I feel like I should be able to do all the work because I see my other classmates doing so well and it's honestly just infuriating. Not to mention a huge blow to my ego. I thought I was good at school."

He smiles a sweet, soft smile, and looks you in they eyes. "Baby, you are good at school. You're like, the smartest person I know! You know as well as I do everyone has different learning styles, and maybe online school just isn't yours. There isn't anything wrong with it, you're not broken, and I promise you you're not going stupid." He cups your face, "Let me do something nice for you though, how does that sound?"

You nod your head, as well as you can with his palms squishing your cheeks.

"Have you eaten yet? I'll make you dinner?"

"Oh Satori, absolutely not, you cannot cook for the life of you, you'll burn the whole world down. Have you really forgotten about the March cupcake incident? The cafeteria was closed for a week!"

He gives you another sheepish smile. "You're right, you're right, maybe I won't make you dinner." "You're right, you absolutely will not." "Okay, okay," he laughs, "Want to order take-out instead?" "Sure," you reply.

"Watcha want?"

"No idea."

"Why do I even ask at this point?"

"I'm not really sure, Satori," you laugh.

"Hey! There's that laugh I love so much." He walks over to you, hands outstretched and fingers wiggling. "I wanna hear it again!"

"Ohhh, Satori, don't you dar- AH hA Sator Ahaha stoppp, it tickles!"

He pauses for a second, "That's kind of the point, silly!"

He continues your so-called torture, which ends with you two laughing and cuddling, takeout completely abandoned. You remember it much later, when it's far too late for you to call anywhere, so you make the two of you some surprisingly healthy food. Satori complains about the tomatoes and not getting to treat you. You tell him to shut up and that seeing him was enough. All is well.

Akaashi Keiji

→ Akaashi definitely has a sixth sense when it comes to you feeling down you don't understand it (and he doesn't really either) but you're certainly not complaining and neither is he because it makes him very happy every time he can make you feel better → he's just somehow always there when you need him → one time u were just feeling down and he happened at that exact moment to send you an adorable text telling you how much you meant to him → another time you were super stressed out he happened to bring you some flowers he had found while he was on a walk → honestly just 10/10 boy → i (we?) stan → n e ways, you kinda felt like crud because you just had → so. much. work. → you were so stressed out you could barely think → you knew you were getting behind on your assignments, but you just couldn't seem to do them → it seemed so simple in your head but something about the actual doing the assignments was just hard → you felt like you were gonna scream → sigh

+

Literally at that exact moment, your Lord and Savior, Akaashi Keiji walked into your room.

"Hey my love, are you doing okay? I sent some texts and you didn't respond- no worries, I'm not upset. I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay."

You turn your chair to face him, greeting him with a meek smile. "I'm doing okay. Just stressed out because of school. It's a lot."

He smiled at you, walking over to your desk, setting down the bag in his hands. "I figured as much. I brought you some stuff."

You perk up at this, and he internally giggles at how sweet you are.

"So, most importantly, I brought you some cookies I made today, yes, your favorite. I also brought you some pasta."

You make a face of confusion at him when he mentions pasta, and he's quick to explain himself.

"I know sounds slightly random, I know, but I had just made some and I wasn't sure if you'd eaten or not. I figured it didn't hurt to bring it."

You smile at him and stand up from where you were sitting on the bed, walking over to him and burying your face into his chest. His arms instinctively wrapped around you. "You're the best Keiji, I don't know where I'd be without you."

"On the moon, probably."

"The moon?"

He hums in confirmation. "You're a wonderful person, I know you're going to go far."

You smile up at him, grabbing his face to bring him into a kiss. "I love you Keiji. So much."

"I love you too, so, so much."

The two of you stay like that for a bit, before he breaks the hug and goes back to the bag.

"Oh, I almost forgot, I brought you this too."

He holds up a bag of your favorite chips.

"Keiii, you spoil me. I don't deserve it."

"Mmm, yes you do. You absolutely do." He puts down the chips and comes back to you, this time taking your face in his hands, and looking you right in the eyes.

"Yes, yes you do. You deserve every little thing I get for you, every little thing I do for you, everything. I promise you, you are the most deserving person out there. And I would rather give my love to no one else."

"But my scho-"

"No. I don't care how much or how little schoolwork you've done. It doesn't change how I think. You deserve me and all the nice things I do for you. No buts. And don't you dare not eat the food I brought for you. I know what you're thinking, and it's not true. You've definitely worked hard enough to warrant the good things I give you, okay?"

You nod, and he smiles.

"Good. Come, let's heat up the pasta. I'll stay for dinner if you'd like."

You nod again. "Yes please. Can you maybe stay the night too?"

"Of course. I'd love to."

"Thank you Keiji, I love you."

"I love you too, my sweet."

[wxsuthorn]

a sort of organised analysis of The Gifted characters

pt. 1: Pang

(this analysis includes episodes 1-13 of season one and 1-7 of season two, so it probably isn’t completely accurate, but i tried my best. also please excuse grammar or spelling errors that i might’ve made cuz i write these late at night when my creativity sparks lmao)

Characteristics and qualities in the beginning of season 1

Even in the very first episode, Pang already showed some idealistic qualities. He always thought that the school system wasn’t fair, and he always tried doing the right thing (or what he thought was the right thing). His idealism wasn’t as extreme in the very beginning of the show, since he wasn’t as confident in his abilities. He probably didn’t have much interest in changing the school system when he (and the people around him) saw him as a dumb kid from classroom 8. Getting into the Gifted Program was what affected his idealism to the point where it became a fault.

Before he discovered his potential, he was most likely very confused about his “academic rank”. He was in classroom 8, yet he was in the Gifted Program... but he hadn’t found his potential yet. I can imagine him questioning his worth and how significant he really was; he was also one of the first kids in the gifted class to outwardly express how they felt about the unfair treatment of the ordinary students compared to the gifted students. This was probably because he got to experience both ends of the unequal treatment, unlike the rest of his gifted classmates.

In terms of intelligence, Pang is street smart. In episode one he thought of a distraction to not get caught stealing the test. He also used the egg drop parachute to save his phone. He is innovative and can create ideas and identify problems. In episode one (again), he noticed that Wave was sweating and seemed weak. He also noticed Ohm’s bloody nose and Mon moving a locker full of weights. He was aware of shit... but he’s not very aware of other people’s feelings... at least not fully.

Pang’s friendship with Nac hits different after the pangwave fight but anyways... Pang knew that he didn’t use the cheat sheet, and he couldn’t tell Nac anything about the Gifted Program, so he probably didn’t fully understand why Nac was so upset when he technically did nothing wrong. Nac even said he wasn’t upset that Pang was in the Gifted Program. I think that’s why Pang never talked it out with him and just kinda exploded at him. Even though he may see himself as empathetic, it’s really just him being idealistic. He mistakes his ideals about equality for empathy, when, in fact, those are two separate things. When it comes to individual people, I don’t think he’s very good at understanding them thoroughly enough. Nac’s reasons for being upset with Pang are realistic and valid. He’s in class 1, Pang’s in class 8, yet Pang was the one who got into the Gifted Program. Nac gave Pang a cheat sheet, and even though Pang denies using it, he couldn’t really believe that he got in with the grades he has. And on top of that, Pang doesn’t even tell him what happens in the class. Nac feels used and excluded, but Pang wasn’t paying attention to that. He ended up blaming the unfair system, which was just a factor of the conflict, but never took a moment to look at what he himself could’ve done to help the conflict, or even what he might’ve done wrong. but issokay cuz pang is a smol bean and i love him

Characteristics and qualities in the middle - the end of season 1

Lets talk about Pang discovering his potential in episode 6. He first noticed it when he told Nac to bang his head on a metal bar. This wasn’t the first time he used his potential on Nac, though. In the first episode he used it on him and said something like “don’t talk to me ever again”, and so Nac didn’t communicate with again him until episode 6. This was when Pang used his potential on him saying “why can’t we just talk it out?” and Nac was finally able to communicate his frustration. Nac was blaming Pang for shit he didn’t do and it was unreasonable, according to Pang, but Nac didn’t know the full story. If you look at the way Nac sees things: Pang is in the Gifted Program, Pang used me to get into the program (because there’s no way he just got in without using my cheat sheet), I got punished when Wave provoked me and Pang tried playing hero, as if he was some perfect angel. Pang has new friends, he has no use for me anymore, I don’t need him either, I find new friends, Pang suddenly joins in, everything goes haywire, my anger and frustration towards him explodes, and he just ignores what I’m feeling and tells me that I’m wrong and that I’m an asshole. Like I did something wrong, and he’s perfectly innocent. Lmao Nac is salty af. And he has a good reason to be. Pang doesn’t understand Nac’s thinking, and on top of that, he makes almost no effort to understand. His beliefs blind him into thinking he’s done no wrong.

Now lets talk about his actual potential, and how it affects him. His ego and self esteem rises, but Pang doesn’t notice it. It’s explained in the end of season 1 that the reason Pang lost is because he wanted to do everything on his own because he thought that only he was able to defeat the director. His ideals and his ego are very closely connected. Pang teams up with Wave because he thinks that Wave will be the most useful to stop Director Supot. Now, I don’t think Pang doesn’t care about his friends, but his actions are neglectful. When Pang teams up with Wave, he tells none of his other friends about what he’s doing. He doesn’t tell Namtaan or Ohm, literally his two closest friends, and convinces himself that he’s doing it to protect them. News flash, he isn’t. He’s trying to be a hero. His ego rapidly increasing might be because of how he was constantly ridiculed when he was in classroom 8, and suddenly he gets this power that makes him “superior” to ordinary people. Another possibility is that his ego was already big, but we he only showed it/applied it when he was trying to take down Director Supot.

Now lets talk about the season 1 finale: Pang becomes aware of his ego through the director foiling his plan and humiliating him. This is a big part of his development as a character. Ofc in season 2 he still has a problem with neglecting and doing things solo, but he become a little more aware, and for 2 whole year’s he’s able to somewhat-effectively lead the gifted gang in their fight against the anti-gifted.

Characteristics and qualities in season two (up until episode 7) 

Lets discuss: Ms Darin. aka ms loser. Remember in the beginning of episode 7 where he trusted her cuz of what she said and he noticed her actions (oop remember this trait from before? he’s aware of shit!), but it turned out it was all lies. He eventually got back on track after Third showed him the truth, and was smart enough not to trust Ms. Darin after that. I wanna guess that the reason he started trusting Ms. Darin so easily (other than what she said and did) is because he was in distress from failing Korn and Time. He needed some support, and he wouldn’t let his friends support him because “im a hero blah blah blah i dont wanna worry my friends they dont need to help me with my burdens cuz i can do it on my own :D” season 1 Pang type shit. Ms. Darin was an adult who seemed trustworthy enough, plus Director Supot was gone, and he was the main antagonist in season 1, so isn’t everything only gonna get better now that he’s gone? Plus when Grace said that he sounds like the adults lksdjlkjslfjjsdf THAT HIT ME.

Now I wanna talk about him with Chanon. I’m praying that Chanon is pure and not corrupted because if he is he might’ve used Pang and might do so in the future too... but let’s not focus on that. Pang finally has a mentor-figure in his life that he looks up. Someone to balance out his ego and show him that he can’t do everything on his own. yeah that’s all i have to say about that.

Punn. “You’re done, Pang.” Yeah lets talk about that because holy mcnuggets. Punn knows Pang well enough to know how intensely idealistic and passionate he is. Once the director is gone, Punn is like, bitch u got nothing else to obsess over MOVE ON. He’s basically saying Pang’s existence was so heavily tied with fixing the school system that when eveything’s fixed, he’ll be “done.” It’s similar to Five from the Umbrella Academy, where his whole life was set on fixing the apocalypse that he felt that life had no meaning without an apocalypse to prevent.

Now let’s talk about PangWave... I truly believe that Pang sees Wave as his equal, as his friend, and as a person whom he cares for deeply. His ego and idealism, topped with all the stress he’s going through (by himself), are dangerous towards his relationships. Wave feels used by Pang, and explains how Pang only comes to him when he needs his help, and avoids him when he disagrees with what Pang thinks. Pang is so fixated on his ideals and beliefs that he will do anything to make sure they become a reality. He’s obsessed, and it’s sooooo bad for his relationships with others. It shows that even on Namtaan’s bday, he can only think about “doing the right thing”, because that’s his number 1 priority. PANG JUST GIVE URSELF A BREAK PLEASE TAKE A METAL HEALTH DAY JUST SLKJFLSDKJJD MEDITATE OR SMTH.

I could type for several hours longer but I think this is enough word vomit for this post.

Summary

- VERY IDEALISTIC !!!! TO A FAULT

- He has somewhat of an inflated ego, but uses his ideals and beliefs to cover it up and convince himself that he is a “good person”

- He overworks his brain by never thinking of himself or other people’s emotions and focuses on his idealistic goals and his idealistic goals ONLY.

- He’s very aware of the things’s around him, and is street smart, but he’s not as aware when it comes to other people’s feelings and thoughts.

- He cares for his friends, but his extreme idealism ends up hurting them, and in turn hurting himself and further encouraging him to self-isolate.

- Independent, but this is mostly due to him thinking that he can handle problems on his own and he doesn’t want to get others involved.

- He is becoming more aware of his wrong actions, hence him apologising to Wave about going after Korn without him, but not enough to actually prevent these wrong actions.

- didn’t talk about this much but GUILT!!! I can tell that he feels immense guilt (especially in the latest episodes) whenever one of his friends get hurt and he’s very involved in what got them hurt. However, when it comes to hurting people emotionally, his guilt is tricky to read. At least for me it is lmao. Cuz he doesn’t always fully understand his friends’ feelings because he can’t always admit that he’s done something wrong, but with the recent pangwave fight he definitely felt some type of guilt there. Or maybe it was frustration? idk skjdflajsdfl someone else step in on this one pls

- He needs rest and a mental break. And some therapy maybe? Like please can one caring adult help this poor child.

- His character is actually pretty consistent wow the writing in this show is great.

- a cute boi who needs a hug. Preferably from Wave and/or Ohm.

[redxblueihateloveyou]

Wait, someone said that the given movie was the best romantic story ever? For real? Lmao but it was so bad!! Even in comparison with the original anime abt Mafuyu which is not my favourite but still it so was much deeper

yeaaaah, that was my reaction too. I thought I misread it, I’m not gonna expose anyone, but it's still under one of my vids, she said that after the given movie she couldn’t watch heterosexual romances anymore, bc they seem so lame now. I was like “AFTER THE GIVEN MOVIE?!!! AFTER THE FREAKING GIVEN MOVIE???!!!!!!!!!!!!” I thought it was some mistake, but no, lmao, she was dead serious.

I’ve also checked its MAL reviews after that out of curiousity, there are like 10 maybe, but just go and read some of those, you’ll die. Quoting one: “ IT IS PROBABLY ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE ROMANCE FILMS.”

I’m deceased for real, is everything ok in this world? If thats what you think love is supposed to be like, I feel sorry for people.

The movie is garbage seriously, the relationships there are cringe af, god forbid anyone to think its a perfect love story, holy shit ppl, you’re watching stuff with your ass or smth. It’s not even about the preference and stuff, it’s like bad on so many levels no matter how you look at it.

Even Given the anime, I will never get how can it be a good love story for anyone. Mafuyama is cute sometimes, but lets be real, it’s a mess. I don’t even know where to even start with this whole thing. Like 1stly it’s debatable whether it’s even love or just a consolation, I even made a little debriefing between the adults about this, being curious again. 2ndly, besides Mafuyu other characters can be forgotten in like 2 seconds, like no one even bothered to write them, they’re so basic. 3rdly, it’s a rushed mess that isn’t even believable considering everything. Does anyone even believe in any depth of those relationships?

Like if you touch such difficult themes either do it in the right way, either don’t do it at all really. This is just facepalm. Sounds like some teenage fanfiction I’ve read on ao3, who tried to write smth deep, but it ended up shallow instead.

I honestly don’t even know how they pick what BL to animate, bc I’m always like “you seriously picked this? you’re kidding right?” like there’re so much absolutely fantastic BL with such amazing characters and what we have here is stuff like “stranger by the beach” or this, I’m like “plot who, characters where”.

Like it’s great that at least Chinese BL animes are now gain popularity and besides incredibly animated mxtx stories, priest’s stuff is getting animated too and ppl can watch BL with an actual amazing story now. 

I just don’t get why Japan picks what it picks. Like lets animate “Titan’s Bride” lmfao ok dudes great choice. Then someone will watch it and yell BL fans are complete morons.

But Given the movie... Given the movie... I’m.. don’t even let me start on this... my fucking god seriously.

[sun-daddy-yoriichi]

May i request a love triangle between Yoriichi and Muzan? You can write anything abt it i’m just curious how that would go :)

Ooh? Sounds interesting! I’ll do my best~

Not sure if you wanted polyamory or not, so I just did what seemed to be correct? A relationship between Yoriichi and Muzan seems interesting, at least to me.

▃▃▃

Warning(s) : Spoilers, polygamy if that helps at all, I sure hope this gets weird

Muzan Kibutsuji x Reader x Yoriichi Tsugikuni : Love Triangle (Headcanons)

Let’s start this out by saying it would be a VERY awkward love triangle at first.

Yoriichi and Muzan have zero chemistry. Muzan wants to rule the world or smth, and Yoriichi’s job is to kill Muzan and demons in general. Not exactly two sides of the spectrum that you would want to mix.

They would have killed each other a long time ago, had it not been for their S/O begging them to stop.

Their S/O, of course, would be caught in the middle. If they’re not trying to kill each other every other minute, they’re vying for their attention in the most subtle ways.

Yoriichi, of course, has the advantage of being able to walk in the sun, so he always uses this to get closer to them

Would totally rub this in Muzan’s face

Muzan, however, would always use his money and good looks to his advantage. Constantly buys gifts and paying for fancy meals. With him, their S/O doesn’t even have to worry about wanting anything. If they look at anything for just a little too long, it’ll be bought without a second thought.

Sugar daddy Muzan lmao

Sooner or later, they fall into routine with one another. Yoriichi usually spends time with their S/O during the day, while Muzan takes them out at night, before bringing her home.

But the harmony between them isn’t weird. They don’t even have to see each other, just their S/O.

It’s when Yoriichi and Muzan actually begin working together that would worry someone.

It would take a while, sure, but eventually they would get used to one another. At least, enough to see each other without immediately triggering their Fight or Flight response.

It starts small. Sideways glances and gently spoken words of greeting, or farewell.

They don't talk about one another at first. Nothing that would actually call for them to have a strong emotional relationship. Their S/O was their main concern at all times.

But let's be honest. Muzan is a spoiled brat and can't have one thing without having the other.

Not that he particularly likes Yoriichi, but nothing about him screams 'off-limits' so

It's free real-estate

The minute the Demon King of Pop starts courting both humans, it's over for you bitches.

Will ABSOLUTELY try to convince sun daddy and S/O to become demons. While you could refuse, he has all the time in the world to convince both of them.

Plus, getting rid of Yoriichi also means getting rid of his biggest threat.

This would probably be after Yorriichi showed the Kamados his Breathing techniques, so that bitch still gonna die eventually.

Convincing his S/O to become a demon is one thing. Convincing Yoriichi is an entirely different sport.

Though, if their S/O agreed that it would be the best idea if it meant all three of them could be together, then holy fuck he would say yes so fast. There's nothing he wouldn't do for them, even if Muzan is some greasy ass Demon King.

(Not apart of the hcs but I bet Yoriichi would be a pretty demon. Not like Daki pretty, because Daki is gorgeous in her own right. Like, 'he'll scorch your eyeballs out just with his looks if you're not at the same level as him' pretty. A scary kind of pretty).

Their S/O would definitely be the prettiest demon to them. Muzan made sure to share plenty of his blood so that they turned out strong (far stronger than any of the Upper Demon Moons, but he doesn't want them lifting a single finger for anything).

No doubt that their S/O would still be hauntingly deadly, even as a freshly born demon.

Yoriichi wouldn't be able to hurt any humans, anyways. He feels a strong sense of injustice about being the one to shed blood, though doesn't mind eating them. Food for the machine, right?

If you thought Muzan would be indulgent on knowing every aspect of his lover's lives, you would be correct. He doesn't have much else to do, after all.

Being with both of these men require their S/O to be okay with sitting in one of their laps at all times. Period. End of story.

Muzan thinks his S/O is the most precious demon to ever walk the planet, if he's not busy making heart eyes at Yoriichi for being scorchingly gorgeous.

Muzan has a thing for stunningly beautiful beings, I'm sure.

(This got really long for no reason so I gotta wrap it up)

Overall, if the perfect chain of events were to play out, the results would be this :

A very lovely, but very deadly, demon family, in which none of them would hesitate to rip off someone's head if need be.

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

ah yeah, i think quarentine has given people some opportunity to actually just sit with the person they are, rather than be rushing around for the person they want to become. its good you got smth good out of isolation! ah thats great! hope you had fun and ur partner in crime speeds back home so you can get out more hehe.

ah yeah ty, good suggestions.

hmm good point, i was sort of putting it separate to the whole not-sexualising thing, but yeah. mmm yeah i totally agree, some of the enhypen fics/imagines *shudder* and even reading innie stuff is just a bit *icky* cos everyone still thinks of him as our agi ppang. yeah def would be good but sadly this just seems to be the world we live in. :(

ah yes the holy masterlist (not sarc) i have actually read in the rain and gladius maximus before, but ill go look for in class! oooh thats good! character development lol. hmmmm yes champagne problems was the angst to end all angst, that shit hurt. it was actually one of the first of your fics i read and i recall almost crying over the whole thing, it was so heartbreaking, i can see how it almost made you want to drop angst. good that youve allowed yourself some lee-way tho :)

hehe thats so cool. okay here we go, ill try not to be mortally offended (/hj)

cheese - yes same, i liked it but that was all there was, it wasnt a super standout track. it was rlly underwhelming for me but some of the hook is super catchy so there is Redemption (tm) in store for cheese maybe

thunderous - mmm, yeah at first i totally agreed, i think they suffer from too much good music syndrome, that all their other tracks are such fucking bops its hard to stay at that level of perfection. the choreo was beautiful tho and tbh, the track has grown on me since ive been watching all the vids abt it. its my brothers favourite track

domino - YES GODAMMIT IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE TITLE TRACK. the raps, the vocals, the vibes, the fucking domino sound in the back? i would have streamed that shit on repeat. but tbh, as good as it is, it doesnt have that sort of grandness/oomph that skz seems to like in their title tracks so i can see why they chose thunderous (tho domino would have been so good) *sigh*

ssick - yeah same, not my fave track by a long mile, the crowd cheering was a ?strange? choice and the chorus was a bit bare/empty, plus like i mentioned earlier, it was kinda funny to me for some reason but ill still play it if im playing thru the whole album

the view - ahh one of those not like other girls (/j) i honestly think its just a good party song, just a bop to play in the background when nobodys rlly paying much attention. its pretty generic pop music but catchy

sorry, i love you - hehe yeah i thought it was going to be sadder as well, but i rlly loved the fact that they all just got to sing, which almost never happens, i dont think ive heard felix sing for a long time, so i enjoyed it. wasnt rlly a standout track but i just casually like it. looking forward to the fic haha

silent cry - this song i swear, some bits are rlly good and then others are just? why?? it does sound like a dance song tho idk. definitely not one of my faves either

secret secret - YES its so good! its such a chill song and i love their vocals in it. the combination of lo-fi/fake strings backup stuff and their heavenly vocals just makes it *chefs kiss* im listening to it rn and just... its so beautiful. it gives me pumped up another day vibes ya know? like my pace is edgy get cool, this one is energetic another day i feel like. overall i love it

STAR LOST - ah thats so cool! i didnt know that! on first listen this song had a similar vibe to secret secret but then the beat came in and ahh its such a good song. i can totally imagine them putting this song to a concert footage vid, this song is so sweet.

red lights - LMAO YES ITS SO AWKWARD WHY DOES IT GO ON FOR SO LONG ah thats good! yeah good point, its quite intense hehe. but that is my fave trope and this is lowkey my favourite track on the album so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ just the combination of hyunjins and chans voices, the backing music, the lyrics ahh red lights my beloved

surfin’ - yes lmao its always a shock, i feel like they should have put gone away in between them, but its such a fun cute song, i cant get rlly mad. yeah, as an aussie i think im contractually obligated to like beaches lol. sand im not such a fan of, but my familys rlly into fishing and my brother loves bodyboarding so we stay at a beach house at least twice a year and we live like 5 mins from 3 different beaches (hehe all aussie cities are on the coast lol) so thats cool. do you like beaches?

gone away - ah gone away my beloved, i love this song sm, its just so pure and showcases their vocals and lyrics so well. yes the pitch change is very out of the blue, i feel liek they went directly from seungmins soft vocals to hans powerful ones which was an interesting choice, but hey, im not complaining

wolfgang - YES IKR ah im so happy he got to be included in that era and song. yeah its such a full on song i cant rlly listen to it if im in a quiet mood but its very motivating :)

hehe mood, i hope they do! ahhh no rest, but at least you wont have to pull a blink and wait a year for any word from the group lol. im not rlly into nct but im excited for them! ah hopefully youll be able to sneak some rest into that chaotic schedule, with enhypen (idk if u stan but yeah) squeezed into it haha

<3 w.a. 🐺

i wheezed at partner in crime, it reminded me of smth. i have a lee know fic in the drafts that i wrote 'in honor' of him (and his departure-ish). i'll tag you when i finish it, if you want. it's a rather hilarious one.

oh my god. based on my experience on the collabs i've joined before, writing explicit shit for '01 & '02 is not accepted (nct's maknaes) but with enha's hyung line '01 & '02 somehow it's okay? i do a double take every time i see fics like those i mean, technically, it's legal but still what the fuck. maybe it's just not for me at the moment. not at us venting our frustration about this. it's just something that's so accepted here that i am (in all honesty) slightly uncomfortable about. but oh well. that's kpop writerblr for you.

man i could've linked all the fics in the ask instead so you wouldn't have to go looking for them! i think i saw you like in class the other day (the fic i renamed into sharp-tongued, god it took me a while to remember the new title). describing champagne problems as an angst to end all angst is one way to put what i was feeling back in december. it just hurt to write and admit?? if that ever happened to me i would prolly cry :d

okay back to the album talk! i love how you answered with more thoughts. i love exchanges like these! i am a victim of the cheese hook and it's now one of my favorite tracks in the album. PLS, TOO MUCH GOOD MUSIC SYNDROME. that's on our self-producing kings 😌💅 also, your brother has taste! as i am typing this, domino's currently playing in my head and i realized that too, that it doesn't have that 'vibe' of a skz title track. honestly, this could be a title track of another group. ssick is starting to grown on me because i found the beats cool kdjsk not the not like other girls 😭 the view is the generic pop that i don't like but i get why a lot of people enjoy it. sorry i love you scratches a certain itch that i find myself singing the first few lines every time i remember it. i too would want to hear felix sing more!

> a mini junction on the album talk bc i got side tracked. on that topic, i want skz to switch positions at some point like i know those allrounders are capable of doing so. specifically, i want to hear seungmin rap!!!! (yk in the recent weekly idol he talked faster than changbin in a challenge and changbin is like the fastest rapper in kpop that's active atm if im not mistaken. my dandy boy has some potential and i want it UNLEASHED.)

back to album talk. silent cry is basically sad music to twerk to. secret secret is definitely one of my favorite tracks :( i loved how you compared the tracks HAJSAH i burst out laughing bc yk what, you're right! i want to make a star lost edit of skz but i simply do not have the time i want to cry. i love the song so much. ok, my dreaded track, red lights. idt i have played the track since we last talked. my friend sent me the lyrics tho and i'm itching to write a twisted au out of it. idk if you're comfortable with yandere but somewhere along those themes. the obsessive type of love that's sweet at first but turns rotten. IMAGINE IF THEY PUT GONE AWAY BETWEEN ASHJA it's like going from 50 shades to the notebook.

i was about to ask if you lived near the coast and you literally mentions it here god im so stupid. yes i LOOOOOOOOOVE beaches so much. living in an archipelago is fun :( i live in a part of the country that's more island than city so every time i want some vitamin sea it's accessible. i heard the waves in australia are great :( anYWHOOO gone away :(( every time it plays im compelled to skip it because it makes me sAD AND NOWADAYS I DONT HAVE THE TIME TO BE SAD. contrary to you, i dislike my quiet moods because i tend to overthink a lot.

i have this little analogy about how there are stays that enjoy songs the generic pop + mellow songs and then there are other stays that enjoy the noisy tracks. in my mind, it's like a perfect balance that makes me feel like all the tracks are loved in the end. just by different people.

PULL A BLINK. bro i fucking hate yg entertainment. they have the biggest kpop girl group LOCKED in their basement when they could be (and i mean this in the most business-like way not morally) milking money of the quad. they're yg's biggest hope at not being bankrupt atm so it's a damn fucking mystery to me as to how they aren't doing anything. (jk i just realized lisa solo album soon, but i still need a ot4 cb hELLO)

i stopped looking forward to the teasers. rest > kpop boys. i don't want to sound like a cult member but have you tried checking out nct? are they just not your thing? (i get it tho, that's one hard group to get into). and yes i do stan enhypen!

wow i love how long these asks are! they're like online penpals. but i also want to ask about you! how have you been lately? are you feeling okay both mentally and physically? how's the weather there? do you have anything that you want to talk about? maybe an interesting book you read? feel free to bring up anything you want to share! i'm getting conscious about talking about myself HAJHSJ

and yet another long answer B) i am sooo sorry T___T should these ask exchanges feel draining to you, feel free to stop sending them in AAAA

[seijorhi]

asks :)

once again, i’m terrible at answering things :)

First off, your newest Kuroo story WRECKED ME. OMMMMMG LIKE IT'S SOOO FUCKING GOOD. You are one of the most incredible writers ever, like professional style writing. These should be books and you should get paid for it, honestly. Your skill is totally unmatched, my friend. I just adore everything you write. I had two questions thou about the story, just because I am totally obsessed by it- so has Kuroo been obsessed with her since he saw her, I'm like curious how his obsession started 

like is it because she's young and he's interested? Cuz I totally got the vibes at the party that he was showing her off like she was his girlfriend and he seems like he has been wanting her for awhile. I was just curious about how it started cuz god I'm a simp for yandere kuroo- boss man Kuroo would make me weakkkkk. My second question is so is he like obsessively in love with her or is it like just a this hot piece of ass is mine to fuck kinda thing? Like does he want a relationship?

anyways, I love you and I love your writing. Everything you write is legit perfection! Thank you for all your beautiful stories you share with us! - Kai

first of all, whomst gave you the right to be so damn sweet???!?! dsgsjkl thank you, bby!

so, like with all my fics i kind of have a ‘read into it how you want’ thing going for it. whether or not kuroo actually has ‘romantic’ (i use that word loosely) feelings for the reader or whether he just enjoys fucking her because he’s in a position of power and she’s easily manipulated is left a little up to your interpretation and how you’d prefer to imagine it. however, having said that there are little hints throughout the fic that imply that there’s a little more depth to kuroo’s feelings. you’re not wrong with the whole ‘showing her off’ vibe at the party, and there’s mentions of confessions that kuroo gives while he’s fucking the reader - also the title of the fic, invidia, means envy in latin. so take that how you will 🤷‍♀️

and as far as how it all began, i like to think that it was kind of a slow build. again it’s implied that kuroo has met the reader (however briefly) a few times before - at games as nekoma’s manager, when she initially was introduced as his girlfriend and she has stayed over at their place in the past. it wasn’t so much a singular moment, but kuroo’s definitely been paying more attention to her than she realises. 

WHAT WHAT WHAT???? RHI UHMMM WAS KUROO IN LOVE WITH THE READER???? 👀👀👀👀 HOLY SHIT. I'm honestly mind blown rn like I have a lot of questions like did Shin know? Was he also into it? Omg the idea of Father and Son sharing reader...

(also I def did not hope that Bokuto was also there cuz that would have be fun....oppsss)🙊

hehehe

no, shin didn’t know but oh can you imagine the betrayal if he did? if he willingly set up the reader to be fucked by his dad 👀god damn

adsfgdhjfkfl there was a moment i genuinely considered having something more happen at the christmas party where bo would stumble across and one thing would lead to another.... but i decided not to go that route. this one needed to be solo kuroo haha

Rhi, what can I say, amazing as always!

ahhh thank you sm, bby!

Hi i absolutely love the kuroo fic at first no one would actually notice he was into and then story actually rises nicely however i would like to ask like what happens later im sorry im a little burnt out from my mountains of assignments that i cant think of a possible aftermath since the story had an open ending but yeah what happens later after the whole scene does y/n stay there for the 7 days and get r*ped again or she goes home early and like what happens to kuroo and shinsuke im sorry for annoying you with questions its fully up to you whether u would like to answer or not :-)

aw, thank you! I hope your assignments and stuff are all done? And pls bby, you’re not annoying me at all 💕💕💕

Honestly again, it’s kind of left up to what you like to think would happen, but personally I think that the reader stays, because there’s no easy way to get out of that situation without raising suspicion - which means that she then has to spend the next week trying unwittingly playing cat and mouse with Kuroo who’s gonna use every damn opportunity he has to push your boundaries 👀

Duuuuude invidia fucked me up! Like fuck, lol! The build up was so spectacular! It makes me wonder two things: how did kuroo’s obsession start, and what would shin have done if he caught them (and why do I feel like he’d join in... I guess it runs in the family lol).

I loved it sooooo much and im also so creeped out lol. Can’t trust other people’s dads. Everything about it was perfect!

glad you liked it, bby!!

shin’s a good boy and he genuinely loves the reader, but i think if he did stumble across the two of them he’d just shut down and walk away. it’d be the biggest betrayal in his eyes - it wouldn’t matter if you were drunk or he was, who came onto who - the two most important people in his life going behind his back would just break him :( and i think he probably wouldn’t give either of them a chance to explain

but if we’re talking degenerate shin... 👀👉👈

imagine if invidia! reader gets pregnant and Shin thinks it’s his, but its actually his dad’s 🤭

oooh kuroo would be such a smug little shit - he’d get extra touchy feely with the reader, drop ‘casual’ hints, basically doing everything outside of straight up admitting it to him, just to see how far he can push until shin starts to doubt whether he’s actually the father - when it’s just the two of you though... i think he’d be a little softer - but equally as possessive - you’re his, and so’s the kid growing inside of you

Kuroo: son do you know what a cuck is? Shinnosuke: no? Kuroo: wOULD YOU LIKE TO FIND OUT - @south-korea-cakes

dagshjskl i snorted when i read this but you’re not wrong lmao

hi rhi! i have a question about Lion’s Den! did oikawa purposely set the reader up to witness his true nature? or was it chance that she saw him kill?

no - i think he’d rather have kept you in the dark a little longer and tried to let things develop ‘organically’ but he’s not upset that you did find out the truth - gives him an excuse to move things along and take what he wants 👀

hey rhi:) soo my boyfriend of two years just broke up with me and so far a major comfort has just been rereading your stories. something about feeling desired, ya know? anyway, thanks for making me feel a little better <3 - @theofficialhufflepuff

aw i’m sorry to hear that :( i’m glad my fics can help make you feel a lil better - sending love bby! 💕

omg i adore everything in the soulmate series hello !! would any of the soulmate pairings ever end up feeling lowkey competitive w/ the other?? like all of them seem to mutually respect the other but would there ever come a point where smth pushes them into trying to outdo ur other soulmate when it comes to ur affection?

also have i mentioned how much i love ur writing bc i love ur writing

hmmm, not so much with oikawa & iwa or ushijima and tendou because i think they have pretty rock solid relationships with each other prior to the reader coming along - if they did it would only be minor stuff

the twins on the other hand - good fucking luck with them because they’ll turn everything into a competition. the moment one twin thinks you’re favouring the other too much expect to get dragged across the room and forced to spend ‘quality time’ with the other. it’s all very petty and exhausting and there is no possible chance for you to win. but thank you sweetheart!!

tonight im thinking about The Final Girl! boys forcing you to share a bed with them for the first time. With Kuroo’s face buried in the crook of your neck, one big hand palming your breast for good measure, Bo holding onto your waist, and Kaashi’s legs tangled with yours. its suffocating, really😪😓

asdgdhjdkdl suffocating? yes. now where do i sign up?? 🥺

you are so talented in writing it's crazy!! just the way you articulate things is ugh *chef's kiss*. i hope you are doing well and not receiving hate 🥺 ily pls

ahhh thank you so much, messages like these always make me so happy! ily bby! 💕

more karasuno first years soon? 👀

who’s to say?? i don’t have any full fics planned but maybe some concepts and thirsts??

if you make a yandere msby fic i’ll literally lose it i love your writing

👀i am considering it

[ghostnebula]

I’ll gladly keep the asks coming 😘 Let’s have some Richie comforting hurt Eddie

I think I’m legitimately running out of ways to write this because it’s in almost every single fic I’ve written shjdshsdjkhf

I’m thinking college AU, therefore set somewhere in the 90s, but the Losers stick together through it. Which gives Eddie the opportunity to learn and grow as a person in some ways, but still -- old habits die hard, and old cycles of abuse die harder. In fact, sometimes they return with a vengeance :))))

(haha get it)

Anyway, what Eddie gets right is escaping Derry with his friends, owning his sexuality (albeit tentatively right now), and taking matters involving his health into his own hands. What he gets wrong is steering clear of people who remind him of his mother, but this isn’t entirely his fault, because the resemblances aren’t always obvious, and even then the association tends to be subconscious.

So when he meets this guy who he just can’t stop thinking about, and who dotes on him but in ways that are comforting in their familiarity but not glaringly obvious in their origins/associations, and he seems to... maybe even like Eddie that way, well, Eddie’s fucking gone for him. He doesn’t know why. He wants to be around him, is all. It’s like they’ve known each other forever. Incidentally, he has pretty much known Richie forever, and Richie dotes on him, too, but in ways that aren’t bordering on sinister, and Richie’s head over heels for him, but Eddie’s so accustomed to that kind of stuff that he wouldn’t realize Richie was in love with him if it slapped him across the face. He also doesn’t seem to realize half the reason he’s even chasing after this guy is because he’s trying to get over his feelings for Richie, or at least just find a different outlet for them, because “obviously” it’s never going to happen.

He’s less than a week from risking it all and just asking this dude from his program out on a date when this guy (let’s call him idk Curtis or smth) asks Eddie out, and Eddie’s fucking elated. He’s on cloud nine. He has a fucking boyfriend. “A boyfriend, Bill, can you believe that? Someone who actually wants to date me!” (Poor Bill’s ready to fucking explode, he’s just nodding along like, holy fuck oh my god how are you this oblivious oh my god I can picture another person who’d saw off their arm to date you pretty fucking easily to be honest.

Things with Curtis are fantastic for the first couple months, and then once -- about 3 months in -- Eddie has this weird fleeting thought that Curtis... kind of reminds him of his mother, sometimes. Funny, huh? Maybe it’s just that he’s so insistent on doing everything for Eddie, which is just him being a gentleman, obviously. Then there’s that time Curtis cries for a fifteen minute car ride because Eddie chose to spend the afternoon studying in the library with his friends instead of with him, and he was so lonely, and “You don’t hate me, do you? It makes me feel like you hate me when you put me on the back burner.” And, of course, Curtis asks him to move in with him, in his apartment just off campus, which means he’s not rooming with Richie anymore. It feels weird and almost awful the first few nights, but he gets over it because Curtis would be offended if he thought Eddie might like Richie (or any of his friends) more than he likes his own boyfriend.

By the time they’ve been dating for a year, Eddie’s lucky to see the Losers more than once a month outside of classes or grabbing a quick meal on campus, but he’s always so grateful when Curtis lets him spend time with them. And Curtis is (usually) so nice, and he’s always taking care of Eddie, and Eddie doesn’t even need to have a job anymore because Curtis pays for everything, anyway, and insists on never letting Eddie spend a cent, which is just so nice, right? Isn’t that lovely of him? In fact, Eddie doesn’t even need to be bothered with money at all, because Curtis handles it all. 

Bev tries to tell him, while they’re waiting in line for coffee before class one morning, that she doesn’t like the way Curtis treats him, and Eddie snaps at her. He doesn’t know where it came from, or why he felt the need to be so defensive, and after he storms off he feels so terrible about the whole thing he doesn’t know what to do. He tells Curtis first thing when he sees him that afternoon, because there’s guilt weighing in his chest about it, and Curtis spends the whole evening pampering him and telling him how much he loves him and how one day, if ever it’s possible, he’s going to marry him. “Don’t you see what they’re doing, Eddie? They’re trying to sabotage our relationship. They think we’re disgusting. They think we’re sinners. They won’t say it out loud, but they’re going to try to ruin us because they can’t stand what we have. You just have to ignore them, okay? Don’t let them ruin this for us.” Of course Eddie believes him. That makes sense. Of course it does. He must be stupid for not realizing that earlier.

But as with all things doomed from the start, there’s a breaking point, and it’s the day Curtis has the gall to actually hurt Eddie. Not in a little way, like he sometimes does when they argue, or how he’s been pushing him to eat less and less because he’s “put on some weight,” or the way he’s been carefully manufacturing comments and insults to keep him down, keep him doubting himself, which in the end is just as bad as any physical hurt, isn’t it?

Eddie’s late coming home from school because he ran into Mike outside the library and they sat down to chat, and he lost track of the time, and there’s a cold feeling in his gut when he gets home and Curtis doesn’t look up from the television as he asks, “Where have you been? Your class ended over an hour ago.”

And Eddie knows, he knows they’re trying to sabotage his relationship, Curtis told him so, but part of him just doesn’t want to believe that, and Mike seemed so sincere. He never once made any kind of negative comment about Eddie’s love life. The most he’d done was ask how Curtis was faring. That was as much as it was even mentioned. So he tells the truth, and Curtis still isn’t looking at him in the few moments of quiet that stretch between them, or when he says, “Come here.”

Eddie obeys. He always does, after all. Curtis grabs his arm too hard and it hurts but he bites his lip because he should have known better, after all, and he’s stupid, and that was stupid of him, and what if Mike is just out to get them? 

“Do you want to fuck this up? Do you want them to take you away from me?” he demands, face contorted by his anger, and Eddie shakes his head. He can feel tears burning at his eyes but he fights them because Curtis told him he’s a crybaby and no one likes a crybaby -- he doesn’t want to make him more angry. 

“No,” he tries to insist. “I just--” But he doesn’t get a chance to finish because Curtis’s free hand connects with his cheek hard enough to snap his head to the side, and the tears overflow even though he really really doesn’t want them to, as he stands there, stunned, mouth agape, cheek stinging. “What the fuck?” he’s demanding, and Curtis is yanking on his arm to drag him closer, holding so tight he’s almost worried the bones might snap.

“Sometimes I think you don’t love me at all, you know that? Sometimes I think you’re just fucking mooching, and you don’t give a shit if I feel valued or not.”

Eddie would normally defend himself. Tell Curtis that isn’t true, that he does love him, that he shows him that every day, to the best of his ability. That he’s given himself over to him completely, and isn’t that proof enough that he loves him? Except right now, he can’t remember exactly what it is that he “loves” about this man.

The arm Curtis isn’t crushing in his grip reels back and Eddie smashes his fist into Curtis’s nose and he knows, in that moment, there’s no salvaging any of this, and wonders how he ever even cared. In his shock and pain, Curtis lets go of him, and Eddie doesn’t hesitate to get the fuck out of there.

He’s definitely crying when he shows up outside Stan and Richie’s dorm, and he’s trying to stop it because he doesn’t want them to be mad when they see him (because he’s an annoying fucking crybaby, isn’t that right?) but he’s knocking before he’s able to compose himself because he can’t fucking compose himself. He’s shaking and he ruined it but, really, isn’t that for the best? When was the last time he was truly happy with Curtis? The shaking won’t stop anyway, and he can feel anxiety building in his gut, making his stomach twist, because he has nothing now. He’s just gone and completely fucked himself over, and the rest of the Losers, well... they probably barely consider him a friend anymore, or if anything they probably think he’s a shit one, and this was a bad idea. Yeah, this was definitely a bad idea, because he’s imagining Stan sneering down at him and demanding to know why the fuck he thought they’d help him when he hasn’t been bothered with them in months, or Richie scoffing and telling him maybe if he wanted help so bad he could go ask his boyfriend, and--

The door swings open and Stan’s eyes go wide, and Eddie can’t get the words out, and he knows he isn’t having an asthma attack but this feels like an asthma attack. “Richie!” Stan is calling, but Richie’s already leaping up from his bed because he caught sight of Eddie through the gap in the door, and besides, he’d know that wheezing anywhere. Stan barely moves out of the way in time to avoid being bowled over. Richie freezes, though, halfway to grabbing Eddie to drag him into a hug, not sure that he’s alright with that (didn’t he always used to be?) and not sure what the fuck is wrong, but there’s a red mark on his cheek that’s pretty telling, anyway.

Eddie’s the one who surges forward first and wraps Richie up in a hug, because he needs it, and because Richie looks stricken, and Eddie knows somewhere deep down that Richie would never hate him. He’s always known Richie could never hate him. He has to repeat it to himself, like a mantra, as Richie awkwardly tries to shuffle back into the room with Eddie latched around his waist, but Eddie’s scared to let go. “Please don’t be mad,” he says, not quite meeting Richie’s eyes.

Everything he’s done in the last year has been so fucking stupid and he’s a fucking idiot and he’s well aware of that, so everyone else must be, too. So he excuses his behaviour with, “I just thought he loved me.” Maybe, in some way, Curtis does love him, but not the way that Eddie wants or needs to be loved, and he just wasn’t smart enough to see it before. He can barely wrap his mind around it now. But his cheek is throbbing where Curtis landed a pretty fucking solid blow, and his arm aches with the beginnings of a bruise, and he’s tired and hungry and miserable and he doesn’t think he’s ever felt less loved.

Richie, though -- Richie helps. Richie makes him feel better just by being here. By not letting go of him as they settle onto the bed, lying on their sides. Probably because he can tell how much Eddie can’t stand the idea of letting go right now. Stan brings them ice wrapped in a cloth from the kitchens and Richie holds it to his cheek for him and wipes the tears away and Eddie apologizes, over and over, until Richie tells him to stop. “You’ve got nothing to be sorry about, Eds. Okay? You’ve got nothing to be sorry about.”

Stan whispers something to Richie as he’s pulling on his shoes, and Richie nods, eyes flickering up to look at him, but then he’s looking at Eddie again as the door clicks shut behind Stan. 

“I’m just glad you came here. I really am. You know we’ve got your back, right? Whatever you need. We’re here for you.” Richie’s gone all soft, eyes shining, his hand resting on Eddie’s cheek even though he isn’t trying to dry his tears anymore. His glasses sit at an angle on his face, one side pressed to the pillow, and it would probably be funny if Eddie weren’t so goddamn miserable right now.

“I gave him everything,” he says, through the thick feeling of tears blocking his throat. “I... I just thought he loved me.”

(That softness in Richie disappears for a second -- so brief Eddie’s immediately wondering if he might have imagined it -- to be replaced by something hot and fierce and pissed, like he could burn cities to the ground if so inclined, and inclined he is.)

A tear finally slips out of Richie’s eye and runs sideways down his face to soak into the pillow. “I know,” he says. “I’m sorry. We’re here for you. We love you, you know that, right?”

He should. He can’t believe he’d ever doubted it, but something (Curtis) had him doubting. It’s hard to believe Richie doesn’t love him when they’re lying here like this, and harder to believe he ever thought Richie might turn him away. And as for the other Losers... well, he can only hope they’ll forgive him, in time.

He doesn’t answer because he isn’t sure how to explain that, but he’s sure that he fucked up, in some capacity, and that the love the Losers have for him isn’t completely unconditional. Right? Or is that something Curtis wants him to believe? He bites down on his lip so hard it bleeds but he starts crying all over again, anyway.

The door slams open and Bill is there, Stan behind him with Mike in tow. They file inside just as Bev and Ben come thundering up the corridor behind them, and then the mattress is shifting and dipping as several more bodies pile on around them, and somewhere he hears Stan snap at Bill to, “Take your damn shoes off, you animal,” and Richie, close above him, retorts, “Who the fuck cares? I wear my shoes in bed all the time.”

“Animals,” Stan repeats, climbing over them to sit against the headboard and pull Eddie’s head into his lap. He takes the melting ice from Richie to hold against Eddie’s cheek, which is still swelling despite their best efforts. 

“Sorry,” Eddie says, when Stan tsks and shakes his head after examining it for a second, and several voices at once are telling him, “You have nothing to apologize for,” and “We love you,” and Richie smiles at him, albeit tremulously, before pressing a kiss to his forehead. Eddie hides his face in his hands because he can’t stop fucking crying but now it’s because he’s so fucking happy. Happy to be back with his friends and to know beyond any doubt that they do love him and it is unconditional and he might just be okay, after all.