#slsq pkmn

[harlequinoccult]

Host being a competitive level player while having a beautifly and a tyrunt is so funny to me.

A weirdo in a suit comes over with their f tier mon and asks for a battle, you think it will be easy money so you agree.

They throw in a tyrunt and say it is still in training and they'd rather work out the kinks now than when it evolves.

Sure. Whatever. You do your set up while it barely scratches your team. You barely hear the weirdo muttering about what areas need "improving" as they watch their tyrunt do its job.

When you are finally ready to put the tyrunt out of its misery, the weirdo says "ok, that's enough for now" and switches it out.

You are now facing a gyarados sweeper, a rotom running support, and two bulky steel assholes with perfect ivs that obliterate your team while the weirdo in a suit coos at them.

You lose. Badly. Your team in shambles, your money gone and your pride shot to death.

They didn't even use the fucking beautifly.

Whats even worse is that host is the only one that would have multiple teams since they have the time, money, and patience to house many pokemon.

[harlequinoccult]

Next RO to get a pokémon team is Overdose (Bug/Electric/Fighting). The entire gang is trained on what to do during a detox, they got this shit on lock.

First is his Mega Ampharos. OD has had it since it was a Mareep, and now this little lost lamb has turned into a dragon(-type) cast out from heaven and down to earth (rev 12:9). OD has tried to release it during his worst moments, but his Ampharos simply refuses to leave him.

Lucario comes second, they have matching dog collars. The round spikes on its hands remind me of stigmata, which is fitting. Overdose loves their steel puppy and they play fight often. On a somewhat related note, proverbs 26:11 is very OD-core.

I am cashing in my "dark-types still fit" card to give Overdose an Alolan Rattata. It refuses to evolve because that would mean no more riding on OD's shoulders (OD would try, but it is simply not practical).

Amped Form Toxtricity. It makes guitar noises when generating electricity and you know Overdose is jamming along. Punks gotta stick together.

Shuckle. Overdose is chugging the Shuckle juice straight from the shell, it is as disgusting as it sounds.

Sixth we have a Breloom with the Poison Heal ability (fitting). It is Overdose's silly little mushroom buddy, her partner in violence, her baby who forces her to check the filters on her gas mask so she doesn't die from all the spores she inhales because of it.

BASED AS HELL

[harlequinoccult]

The Host got Flying/Rock/Steel types.

Green tree pythons can be blue, so Basil is now a Gyarados. He is still the Host's little boy who prefers live prey and only likes to be handled by Host. The terrarium is an aquarium now, though.

Hisuian Goodra. "It loathes solitude and is extremely clingy—it will fume and run riot if those dearest to it ever leave its side." Host doesn't go anywhere, so they are golden. They've been together since it was a Goomy and it has yet to understand that it is no longer a lap pokémon (it weights 736.6 lbs and while the Host is willing to give it a try, their doctor is not).

Gholdengo. Host did not gather 999 Gimmighoul Coins, they paid someone else to do it. String cheese surfer somehow has better social skills than Host could ever dream of. Beloved by staff, unlike its trainer.

Rotom is fourth and I am counting it as a flying-type because Fan Rotom exists. It is running around all the cameras and reporting to Host if it sees anything juicy. Has attempted to get Host to sleep by turning off all electronics, but all it got in return was being confined to its pokéball for a month.

Beautifly is next as Host's attack bug. "Despite its appearance, it is savage." This thing canonically hunts and kills prey. World's cutests cold-blooded killer.

The royal heir pokémon, Tyrunt, takes the last spot. "This Pokémon is selfish and likes to be pampered. It can also inflict grievous wounds on its Trainer just by playing around." and "If something happens that it doesn't like, it throws a tantrum and runs wild." It is unclear if Host notices any similarities.

and there they are

[harlequinoccult]

Black Dahlia joins the fray with her Grass/Poison/Psychic team... and the odd one out that I threw in because axe.

Mega Sceptile is her starter. "This Pokémon raises the trees in a forest with loving care." Do not mention that Sceptile is taller than her if you want to live. It has historically hated all of her former partners and MC is on thin fucking ice.

Second comes her Trevenant. Black Dahlia lets it slip that they are related and refuses to elaborate.

Following that she has a Spoink who shows its love by giving her any spare pearls it finds, since clearly she collects them. Black Dahlia has a container in her house filled with Spoink's pearls because she appreciates the gesture and it reminds her of... I mean, it is always useful to have liquid assets.

Fourth is her Beedrill, Dahlia's angriest pollinator. It has a little nest in her garden where it produces delicious honey, just don't look too hard into the nest, okay? That's where it stores its prey.

Lilligant arrives fifth as Dahlia's little pride and joy. Getting its flower to bloom is quite a feat even for veteran trainers and essential oils made from it smell sublime.

Kleavor is the final pokémon and the one who breaks the typing. It is the axe pokémon and it is known for being rough, crude and violent. "If one should chance upon this Pokémon in the wilds, one's only recourse is to flee." What's worse than one violent axe-wielding murderer trying to kill you in the woods? Two of them in cahoots.

ohhhhhh

[harlequinoccult]

Cold's Fire/Ghost/Ice pokémon team was an interesting one to do.

Malinka is now a shiny Litten. "It doesn't allow its emotions to be easily seen. Earning its trust takes time. It prefers solitude." Normal cat behavior. Refuses to evolve and Cold is okay with that.

Aurorus comes next. "This usually quiet and kindly Pokémon has a surface temperature of around –240 degrees Fahrenheit." and "When gripped by rage, Aurorus will emanate freezing air, covering everything around it in ice."  Likes resting its head on Cold and using them as a pillow. Cold refuses to disturb it, frostbite be damned.

Chandelure, obviously. Not even spirits are safe from burning. Cold caught it as a Litwick (it tried to kill them) and they have been murder buddies ever since, with Chandelure drawing the victims closer to Cold.

Cold grew up hearing stories about Froslass, how it was once a human, how it eats souls and uses the corpses of its victims as decoration. The two of them went after the same person and decided to join forces. Froslass tries to freeze them to death every now and then, but Cold barely notices the temperature dropping.

Fourth is Weavile, a pack hunter that has a non-verbal form of communication (Cold actually learnt how to read it, too). There is a non-zero chance that Weavile believes Cold is just a really ugly Sneasle.

"Hisuian Typhlosion is usually gentle and pacifistic. However, once angered, it loses control of its emotions and incinerates opponents until not even ashes remain." Yeah... Cold's starter that they got as a Cyndaquil and arson enabler from day one. The hisuian evolution came as a bit of a surprise, but it seems happy munching on the souls of Cold's victims, so it is fine. Typhlosion is such a mama hen, it keeps trying to check them over for injuries and wants to sleep on their bed to make sure Cold stays warm during the night.

👀👀👀

[harlequinoccult]

Wait does it matter that elysium has a primarina spcifically or is it just the matchung scars?

Elysium lore lets go

Its definitely the scar thing.

[harlequinoccult]

Third RO to get a pokémon team is none other than Elysium (Dark/Normal/Water). Their team was blast to put together within the available typings.

Starting off with a Furfrou, this dog has the aristocatic flair that is just perfect for Elysium, while also being fierce enough to be designated guardian of kings. He pays more for his Furfrou's trimming sessions than some people pay on rent. World's most spoiled dog will look extremely annoyed if blood gets on its fur and, honestly, Elysium gets it, it is really pretty fur.

Second is Milotic. Of course they would get a breathtakingly beautiful pokémon that is known to be a pain in the neck to obtain. Loves being the center of attention.

His starter is a Primarina. They are GNC buddies and have matching scars. It was his price to pay, but Primarina would not let him carry the burden alone. Elysium has... complex feelings about that.

Mega Houndoom is Elysium's actual hound dog, getting dirty by its trainer's side as they score another kill. It enjoys a good grooming session and training alongside Elysium, but hates social situations, even if it can play the part of a well-behaved dog.

Sableye helps Elysium decide on what jewelry to wear by eating any gems it considers not being up to its trainer's standards. May or may not have helped get rid of evidence via munching, crunching and hiding it in a cave.

Indeedee is usually the one holding down the fort when Ely is away. It is highkey their secretary and has unlimited access to their credit card and all of their online accounts.

hehe

[harlequinoccult]

Let's go. First RO to get a team is Sweetheart. I tried to keep within the Dragon/Fairy/Ground grouping, but there was some deviation.

The first pokémon Sweetheart throws out in battle is his Cyclizar. "The rider's body heat warms Cyclizar's back and lifts the Pokémon's spirit." Sweetheart lets it chase down anyone who tries to run, you know, for enrichment.

Next up, Tinkaton. They are hammer buddies and Sweetheart has been raising this one since it was a Tinkatink. He is a girl dad and his girl wants to kill pokémon and add their corpses to her hammer. He is so proud.

Third is Applin. Rumor says that if someone gives the person they like an Applin, they'll be together forever. Sweetheart has 110% tested this rumor. It has not worked so far. Anyways, hope MC wants it on their team, because it is only a matter of time before a romanced Sweetheart gives it to them.

Following that we have Nidoking and Nidoqueen as his fourth and fifth pokémon. According to Nidoking's pokédex entry, "When it goes on a rampage, it's impossible to control. But in the presence of a Nidoqueen it's lived with for a long time, Nidoking calms down." They are a mated pair and Sweetheart cannot separate them. They are in love and it is good and pure and his Nidoking will kill him if he breaks them up.

And lastly the one that breaks the typing rule, Sweetheart's starter, his blade buddy, is none other than Bisharp. Sweetheart's very first pokémon was something he had to be careful while touching or else risk getting hurt. He has learned absolutely nothing from it.

omg