#slowed these a bit so everything didn't go by too fast
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skullzy20 · 5 months ago
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The Hex in action - Warframe 1999 Animated Prologue
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sylusismybby · 3 months ago
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Sylus doesn't realize how big he is until the first time you two have sex. You hiss, your hand gripping onto his bicep tightly as he pushes his cock into you. "Everything alright, sweetie?" His voice held a certain amount of gentleness, he stops moving as he waits for you answer. "Yes...you're just...big..." Sylus lets a small smile come to his lips. "I'll just have to be careful then. Wouldn't want to overwhelm you thus early on, kitten." His hips move forward again, this time he takes his time, making sure you feel all of him. Your gasps and moans are like music to his ears, he can listen to them all day. "Tell me if it's too much and I'll stop." It was too much but you didn't want him to pull out, it felt painfully good.
Once he was fully inside of you, he let's you adjust to his size, moving only a little bit. Your pussy squeezed him a few times making him groan. "You feel amazing. Can I move now?" He leans down feeling the way your legs wrap around his body, he holds onto your thighs as he kisses up to your jaw. "Yes." It's a weak yes, you felt so full, he felt so good. Sylus nods and then starts moving his hips setting a slow pace at first. As soon as he sees that your experience grows to one of full pleasure, he speeds up, his hips moving quicker, harder. The moans that leave your mouth get louder, your hands move from his arms to his back, nails digging into his pale skin. He chuckles, he isnt fucking you fast, he is fucking you well. "There we go. Thats my good kitten." He kisses you on the lips, it's a kiss of raw passion, you feel him everywhere in your body. The room is filled with skin slapping noises as his cock moves in and out of your pussy.
Pulling away from the kiss, he grabs your hands pinning your wrists above your head. "Look at yourself. You're taking me so well." His red eyes are filled with adoration and lust, this is exactly how he wanted you. You look up at the mirror that was above the bed, it's an imagine that you wish you can take a picture of. Sylus is on top of you, his body moving against yours, his back painted by the scratches of your nails, your sweaty bodies illuminated by the dim lights. It didn't him long to realize where you were looking, he bites into your neck before speaking. "Enjoying the view are we? Atta girl." Then he starts to thrust into you faster, his cock pouding you deeper than before. A loud moan of his name echoes through the room, you grab onto the sheets, eyes rolling back. He was hitting all the right spots.
When your velvety walls start to clench around his length, he knows that you're close, so he slows down, wanting to savor every bit of you. Sylus takes one of your breats in his mouth, his tongue eagerly swirling against your nipple. The combined pleasure is making you lose your mind, your back arches. "Syl! Faster please!" You're begging him now, something you swore you'll never do. "Is that so? Well, what my kitten wants, she gets." He takes hold of your legs and puts them on his shoulder.kissing your ankle before his movements speed up. Sylus admires the way your breasts bounce at his every hard thrust, he admires how your body reacts so perfectly to his. "Syl! I'm close!" The desperation in your voice makes his cock twitch, you feel it too. His hand moves down your leg until it reaches your core, he gently rubs his thumb over your clit to get you to cum. It works, tou cum around his cock, your body twisting in pleasure as your orgasm washes over you. He follows, pulling out quickly and painting your stomach white, his eyes are closed for a moment before he looks at you again. Sylus gives you a few moments before he turns the position around si you were on top of him. "We aren't done yet. Afterall..." He looks up, looking at your reflections in the mirror. "...it's time for me to admire the view too, sweetie."
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multific · 9 months ago
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His Wife
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At'Roh x Reader
Summary: Nothing is scarier than a Yautja who's protecting their mate. And At'Roh is no different, he is worse.
A/N: Another Yautja I made up for all of your pleasure. The above photo is not mine! Credit goes to its owner. Enjoy.
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You looked up at him. 
You were smiling as you walked by his side, proud. 
The wedding ceremony was held yesterday, now you are officially his.
His mate.
You have come a long way, from running away from home, getting picked up by an alien and now being a part of their tribe.
You were proud of the long journey you had.
Now, it was time for a different one.
Marriage.
It has been almost 10 years since they took you from Earth. You understood their language, their traditions and their behaviour.
You fell in love with the new tribe leader almost immediately.
He was still young, losing his father to old age, and At'Roh became a young leader.
Young yet fierce.
Many claimed that he was crazy, even with Yautja standards.
One proof of this was the way he got you.
He wanted you, a little human, At'Roh craved something different, something exotic, taking a human as a wife was just that.
But as time passed, and you two grew closer and closer, he couldn't deny the facts.
The facts were that he not only wanted you as a wife due to you being a human.
A fierce human who kept him on his toes, who was not afraid to say no to him.
You rejected his marriage proposal at least five times.
You hoped At'Roh would give up, but he didn't.
Your little play of cat and mouse ended in a way no one expected. 
Everyone thought you two would bring a war within the tribe.
Instead, you two fell in love.
---
It was late at night, you were sleeping in his arms, and everything was perfect until it wasn't.
It all happened so fast.
You knew your mate would immediately go and fight to protect his tribe.
All you need to do is find the other females and go with them.
You have done this before when your tribe was attacked by a group of bad-blood yautja.
At'Roh looked at you one last time before heading out, you gave him a nod. 
You knew what you needed to do.
But it wasn't so easy this time.
The bad-bloods this time had a plan, and you played right into their hand.
They got you way too easy, but they didn't kill you.
Instead, they dragged you to their leader. 
No matter what you tried, you couldn't escape. 
"He's going to get me, you know!" you told him as soon as they tossed you to his legs. "And he will kill you all!!!" you knew they understood, even if they didn't speak your language. 
"At'Roh is dead." the leader replied before they chained you. Your face fell.
He wasn't dead. He couldn't be.
"Liar." was the last thing you said before the collar clicked around your neck.
The long chain connecting to your neck was given to their leader and you were dragged along as they all ran.
They had no ships. 
It was good, there was a chance At'Roh could find you before they got you to a ship and flew away.
You just needed to hold out and slow them down somehow.
---
At'Roh's heavy breathing was the only thing in the house.
He couldn't even see due to his anger.
You were gone.
His wife was gone.
He knew the way this attack played out was too easy. They had a plan. And the plan wasn't to kill him, the plan was to take you.
At'Roh took a deep breath before putting all of his gear on.
If these bad bloods wanted to play, he was going to destroy them.
Hunting was his speciality. At'Roh loved to hunt maybe a bit too much. While other Yautja excelled at it, he became a monster. A crazed hunter who knew nothing else.
Finding you will be a simple task. His blood was boiling because you were taken.
He wanted to save his tribe only to play right into their hands and help them take you.
It was all a trap to kidnap you. It was a level of disrespect he could not forgive.
At'Roh received information that a female saw a group taking you into the forest, they saw no ships.
At'Roh figured they were taking you to a ship to take you away.
And so, the hunt was on.
---
You have not stopped walking since they got you.
A group of four soldiers and a leader.
They have been dragging you along for hours.
You were beginning to get tired.
You felt like you needed to sit down, but they refused. No matter how you begged.
Looks like their perfect plan had a huge flaw.
They didn't take your refusal and unwillingness to cooperate into much consideration.
They honestly thought they could just drag you along and leave with you.
And this gives time for At'Roh to find you.
You managed to find a sharp stone and cut your hand, hoping to give a trail to At'Roh so he could find you more easily.
You hoped it was enough.
---
At'Roh's anger didn't lessen as he continued his hunt. 
It only grew as he noticed blood on the ground.
He only needed the smallest whiff to tell that it was indeed your blood.
He rubbed the wet material on his finger, watching as it almost coated his fingertip.
He hated that.
He didn't want to see you hurt.
It only fueled his anger and he marched forward, angrier than ever.
He will definitely make sure to kill every last one of them.
It was now morning when he finally caught up with the bad bloods. 
Now he just needed a plan to save you from them.
Thankfully his mind was on autopilot almost since the moment he realized you were taken. 
He moved with such ease, killing everyone that came his way.
At'Roh left no survivors.
Due to the chaos, your scent started to mix with others but he managed to find you.
With a knife to your neck as the leader of the bad bloods had you in front of him.
"Let her go." At'Roh demanded with a dangerously low voice. "If you hurt her, I will kill you."
"You will kill me either way. Why not give you some trouble in the meantime?" you understood everything they were saying and you understood what was happening, what you needed to do. You prepared yourself.
"At'Roh," you said his name, hoping to survive this mess.
His eyes moved to you only for a second, the Yautja behind you took this as an opportunity but you also moved. Moving back towards the alien behind you, using all of your body weight, causing his knife only to gaze at your skin, minimalizing the damage. 
Your movement caused the Yautja behind you to fall giving At'Roh enough time to catch up and move you behind himself before he pounced on the bad blood.
You didn't move, watching your mate defending you as he killed the bad blood.
With a loud scream, he killed the other and stood victorious.
But soon, he turned to you and hugged you.
You didn't even care for the bright green blood on his hands or body. You knew it wasn't his.
Soon, he pulled back and looked at your neck, leaning down to lick along the small cut, helping it heal.
"Take me home," you said, and he understood.
Picking you up with one hand he carried you back towards your tribe.
You were so exhausted, that you fell asleep in his arms as he carried you.
You slept almost the entire day away, exhausted from the way you were dragged along, you only woke up when it was almost night again.
At'Roh was, of course, by your side.
You didn't know but you could guess that he never left your side not once.
You looked into his eyes and you felt safe. You felt at home.
"I will not let this happen ever again."
"It's okay, you killed them and saved me." you placed your forehead against his.
You felt his finger trace your neck, where your cut used to be.
At'Roh will make sure this won't happen ever again, you were way too important for him.
You were his wife after all.
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Taglist: 
@castellandiangelo @imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl @manduse @jacalineiscomingforyou @mandoloriancookie @deliciousfestsalad @lilliumrorum @asgards-princess-of-mischief @fallout-girl219 @dracaryxzs @darlingmira @stygianoir @snowtargaryen
~Masterlist~
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/YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TRANSLATE, OR TO STEAL ANY OF MY WORKS TO THIS OR OTHER PLATFORMS/
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dawnwriterimagines · 10 months ago
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The Verdict Due
SIMON 'GHOST' RILEY x FEM!READER TASK FORCE 141 x FEM!READER
Traitors Among Us (Part 1)
Innocents Among You (Part 2)
The Guilty Plea (Part 3)
Clear Skies (Part 5)
Summary: You head to Laswell to talk on the rest of your now ruined military career. Of course, you're forced to confront your team as it happens, the last people on earth you'd like to see.
If you liked this would you Buy me a Coffee?
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Simon's steps are slow, lacking energy or purpose. Releasing the buckles strapping his vest down to him, he finally arrives to his door, lifting the camo from himself.
His forehead pressing into the wooden door, he finds it harder and harder to open everyday, seeing reminders of you every moment of everyday, when he closes his eyes, when he lays down in bed. Hell when he opens the door. He hated this room now.
Outside of the place that you both had made your home away from war, from battle, from the base, this was where the two of you had once spent most of your time.
He raised his head off the door, before bringing it back down on it, then doing it again, this time hard enough to hurt. "Fuck," he cursed, cursing himself, his stupid decisions, the times he'd never get back, the mistakes he'll never be able to erase. Huffing out bitterly, squeezing his eyes shut, he's still for a moment, before banging his fist against the wall. "Fuck!" There's a crackle along the wall, a clatter of dust and dried paint hitting his feet.
A shuddered breath leaves him, swallowing down his grief, his anger at himself. But, he can't help it. He's ruined everything.
Simon's head stays there against the doorway, he doesn't want to go in.
His head turns a bit, seeing a figure down the hallway, straightening up, dark eyes squinting. "Johnny?"
Quiet and Still. The Scotsman's mouth is set in a hard line, he runs a hand down his face, smearing the mess he'd made of himself. "I..." he breathes deeply. "I saw her today."
"You what?" Simon perks up, eyes wide. He looks past his comrade, seeing the open doorway of your room, "She's here," he speaks, voice alight and hopeful. Making his way past Johnny, "She's here?" he asks this time, bracing himself at her doorway.
But, the room is a mess and void of you. He'd nearly forgotten how the soldiers had left it, the day it happened he could watch it, it would've been too finalizing of what he thought was your betrayal. Today was meant to be the day they'd clean it all up, due to plaguing themselves with missions and ops that required long weeks, long hours. No one wanted to think about what they'd done.
But, now they'd only made another mistake in waiting too long. And now you had to be greeted by this mess.
"I didn't know it was--" Johnny couldn't turn back to the room, back to Simon, as he spoke. "I didn't know we did so much to her. I thought--how long--how could I--" he shakily began. "--how could you?" Simon's eyes flicker to his friend, dark circles and sunken cheeks seem to worsen. "She was so...she couldn't even look at me, Si. Like I'd make her sick, like I'd--hurt her again...I've never--" his fingers claw at his chest, hoping to rip away the ache in his heart, eyes haunted to tears and staring into the dark of his memory as he thought back. "I'd never--" he can't finish.
"She was here?" Simon asked again.
Johnny's clouded eyes look to Simon, opening his mouth before opting for nodding. Clearing his throat, finally seeming to get a handle on himself, "Just left."
"She what?" Simon bolts out towards the stairs, pushing through the doorway and jumping down the first flight to rush through the rest.
As he gets to the lobby floor, he shoves through the door, revealing the hallway to him, running down the long stretch before ramming into the side wall to catch himself at the corner. He continues down the way, running as fast as he's able, before bursting through the side doors of the front lobby.
He sees you immediately, beyond the glass doorways.
"(Y/n)..."
He's running before he can think to get his legs moving.
---
Leaving the dormitories, finally leaving behind the spare hospital wear that you had swapped for your own clothes, you waved down the first vehicle you'd seen.
The driver letting you into the truck, the two of you unaware as he begins to drive off, Simon shoving his way through the residential doors and coming to a stop in the middle of the street as you drive away.
You, having hopped a ride with one of the soldiers making his rounds, the Jeep shakes with the changing terrain, providing more conversation than the trooper that was much too quiet. Shifting his shoulders, adjusting his fingers around the leather, glancing one too many times through the mirror.
It was getting weird. But, you were a familiar face on the base, unfortunately now, it used to be because you were good at your job, the best sniper they had on the force. But now, it was because you were the first proclaimed traitor of the force in decades and the first to be wrong about.
So, the new attention is nothing to be pleased about.
"Find something interesting to look at, soldier?"
Back straightening, body stiffening and eyes facing the road, the trooper swallows thickly at having been caught eyeing you. "No, ma'am!"
"Then I suggest you keep your eyes on the road."
"Yes, ma'am!" clearing his throat. "Sorry, ma'am, I don't mean to stare."
Arms crossed, head turned to watch the smaller buildings go by, your jaw clenched. "It's fine..." you breathe, before relaxing a bit more as the drive goes farther and farther away from the residential areas. Eyes flickering over to the still tense trooper, you mutter. "Ease."
His shoulders drop, head turning, flustered. "Sorry, ma'am."
It was always strange to be called 'Ma'am' by fellow soldiers, usually you were only a year or so apart, others you had been younger by ten years or older by five. But, this trooper was new to the force, young, clearly still jumpy, you had been the same after your first missions on the Task Force.
"I'm sorry, ma'am," the trooper then speaks, shakily.
"You don't have to keep--"
"About what happened to you," he continued. "I'm not sure if you heard that yet, but it's--that sounds--I can't imagine. I'm sorry that happened to you."
For a moment too long you're quiet, holding your breath, staring at the scenery as it whistled on past, the wind whipping through your hair. Your nails tearing into your skin as you rake them over your scars, smearing the line of blood left after ripping out your IV line, abandoning it as you found a ride.
"Get any cool scars out of it, at least?" he jokes, lightheartedly.
Your eyes snap his way, his eyes widening before he looks back to the road, back to stiff.
You open your mouth to speak, but you can't. You're just angry, too angry to find the words. But, you don't want to take it out on him, he was just attempting to alleviate whatever burden he imagined to be on your shoulders. But, all it was was a reminder, this was all anyone could think of anymore, when it came to you, this ordeal.
The apologies, the reminders, the quiet looks, the whispers, the fucking gnawing pain still splintered through your spine, you were tired of it.
The car pulls up to the largest administrative building on the base camp, hopefully you were right and this was where Laswell was posted up.
Quickly pulling the car handle as the trooper steps out of the vehicle to assist you, you hurriedly speak as he reaches to touch you. "I've got it," you hiss out, harsher then you meant. Stepping down and off the platform, onto the sidewalk, you forget you don't have your IV pole to at least stabilize you. So, when you stumble, he grabs your arm, his other resting on your shoulder.
"Woah!" his grip lacks gentleness, though not bruising, it's enough to set you off.
Your arm goes back and over his arm, shrugging him off, roughly. "I said I got it!" Your palm pushing into his shoulder and sending him back and off of you, he shifts back and nearly off his feet, catching himself.
"Alright, jeez!"
You're stumbling back into the light pole luckily a few steps behind you, leaning yourself against the cemented metal, you balance yourself. Shaking off the buzz in your ears and rubbing away the tension built along your skin, taking a few shuttered breaths, turned away from the soldier.
The trooper takes a few steps away from you, expression lifted to frustration and annoyance, rolling his eyes, brows furrowed and back pedaling to the Jeep. "Fucking crazy," he mutters to himself, adjusting his gear and stepping up back to the vehicle.
But, he doesn't make it very far until you're on him.
"What the fu--!"
Taking the opening of his kevlar and yanking him out of the vehicle, unable to catch himself fast enough to get to his feet. You hold a steel grip on the collar of his uniform, literally holding him up by his straps, pulling his entire bodyweight off the ground, leaning down so you're face to face with him. "Say it again," you snapped, eyes dark and boring into his skull. "I wanna have a good excuse for what I'm about to do to you."
He was taller, probably stronger, but looking up at you, he could see the years of mayhem and chaos that's burned itself into your irises, made you the lieutenant he'd tripped up on properly respecting. "I didn't--I didn't say anything! I'm sorry, ma'am, it won't--it won't happen again!"
Nostrils flared, eyes flickering between his wide, fearful ones, your hands loosen around his gear. He falls forwards, landing on his forearms with a groan, releasing a relieved breath.
He looks up, watching as you turn and make your trek into the building. You had seemed so fragile before, with a limp in your walk, scars head to toe and those braces along your legs, he assumed you had no fight in you. He couldn't have imagined, five minutes, he'd be wrong.
---
"Laswell."
The Station Chief turns, manila folder files in hand, brows raised at the intrusion before her eyes widen at the sight of your tired figure.
"Gray..."
You don't wait to be invited inside, instead pulling up a chair as you let the door close behind you. Not fully out of a lack of respect but your legs were killing you and surely if you wait a second longer you'll literally tear a muscle. "You free?"
"Never. But, I can make time," she answers. "Is something wrong?"
You bite down on your tongue. What isn't wrong.
"I put in a request for council in resignation, ma'am. I'm just here to know if it went through."
"I did...receive your request," The woman is still quite surprised to see you, a bit off put at your presence, hearing about your scars was one thing, seeing them was another. "Of course. Though, I expected you to wait for my call before deciding to come to me."
"I'm sure," you feigned a slight chuckle that faded as soon as it started. You say nothing else but stare.
Laswell sighs, tossing down the folder she'd been holding. "Look, Lieutenant Gray--"
"Just (L/N)," you gritted out. "Please." You couldn't stand your codename at the moment, you didn't want to carry a single thing this team had given you.
"Lieutenant..." Laswell pulled up a chair on the opposite side of the long table, facing you, "You've accomplished much on the force, saved lives, eliminated threats that had the potential to level the united nations, your honors and distinctions. At the very least, here, your guidance is a treasure..."
"I'd like my resignation to be approved, Chief--"
Laswell continues. "I need you to careful think about what you're doing here, Gray--(L/n). I don't want you to be motivated by what's happened to you, you still have a place on the force, it doesn't have to be beside your team. Don't waste your talents in the field because of this experience."
"Experience," You scoffed at the word, nose cringing up in disgust at the downplay. "I didn't go on a rollercoaster at Disney World, god--I was tortured by my team for weeks while my fiancé threatened to kill me afterwards..." you were about to lose your mind. "What makes any of you think I'd want to stay here? Why can't any of you just respect my decision to leave? I'm resigning."
Laswell settles back into her chair, lips pressing together, she makes a hum of a sound. "I can arrange a transfer," she compromised. "But, my authorization goes through only after informing Price, he also needs to sign off on this."
Your jaw clenches, your fingers tightening around your clasped hands. "Then how about that favor you owe me?"
Station Chief straightens, brow lifting and arms crossed. "Excuse me, soldier?"
Sighing, reaching a hand into your bag, you bring out a folder of your own, some documents signed off. "I had to wonder who the evidence was sent to, given it was right after our mission and Price doesn't even look at his reports to sign off on something in under 24 hours, it wasn't him," watching as Laswell opened the folder, revealing her own name signing off on the interrogation, just a few of the photos that'd declared you guilty. "Thanks for ruining my career, Laswell."
She spreads out the evidence, her own signature on the papers, she breathes out. "And what are you trying to do here, Gray?"
"Stop calling me that."
"Trying to threaten me with what exactly--?"
"Nothing," you answered. "I'm asking for a favor, from someone I thought was my friend," you find it harder to say, Laswell's jaw clicks and she shifts in her chair. "You owe me that much."
"It's the job, (L/n). I was protecting our own, our resources were very promising."
"Until they weren't, huh?" you sarcastically gritted out.
"Yes..." Laswell sighs. "I do apologize, (L/n), but--"
"Just do this for me," you interrupted, pleading this time. "Please. I can't go to him, I can't even look at Simon, let alone Price. Forget about being in the same room with them. I just--I can't be here, this isn't where I belong anymore," looking down at your hands, the scars that circled your wrists. This was a final decision. "I'm resigning with or without you."
Rising from your seat, Laswell stands as you do, "You resign without clearance, they'll take everything from you. Your pension, your insurance, retirement, everything, you'll be dishonorably discharged, you understand that?"
"'Course, I do," you admit. "Honestly, I thought I'd be dead on a mission somewhere before I saw any of that, I don't expect anything out of this. Nothing's...worth any of this."
As you turn the handle to leave, Laswell speaks once more. "I just wanted to enlighten you on what I'm risking for you, signing off on this."
At that, you glance back to her, watching as the older woman sighs heavily, picking up a pen, opening up the manila folder she'd been holding onto previously. Opening it up to reveal your resignation papers.
"If I do this, when I call on you, Gray," Laswell says. "I expect you to be there."
As she wrote her signature down on the dotted line, you swallowed down the ache that's plagued you for weeks, "I swear."
As the station chief continues down the packet, turning to the next page and signing once again, you slowly slide back into your chair, sitting silently as you watch her sign off on your leave from military service.
You bring your hand up fast as a tear runs down your face, wiping it away before Laswell can see, sniffing quietly.
---
Walking slowly down the side hallway of the admin building, you stare out into space, your eyes glistening as you hold the signed resignation packet to your chest, pressing it to yourself tightly.
Passing the front desk, the security posted up at the elevators, you enter the main hall and come to a stop. Your grip on your documents tightening as you watch rain pour out onto the outer glass of the windows.
Watching the downpour outside, you can't seem to get your feet moving to just leave this place. That's all you need to do, just...walk right through it, into a car, past the gates, onto the highway. Just...go home.
As you flinch at the pitter patter of the rain hitting the building, a short burst of thunder, you try to inch your way closer to the doors but the closer you get, the more you can remember. The more you can feel.
The rain gets louder, and louder. It's cold, although you recall it being 90 degrees and in the middle of the desert. It must just be you.
Putting your folder away and into your bag, the automatic doors open for you, but it's too hard to step through. Staring out into the open landscape, the dividing border of the desert land and the gates surrounding the base. The dry ground now turning muddy, trucks driving by and the mud swelling up at the change in pressure, soldiers rushing through the rain, kicking up mud, flicking up umbrellas.
Breathing deeply, you scuff your shoes forwards, feeling the first drop hit your skin, it's warm, but it's no comfort. Gasping at the feeling, you stumble back into the building, the automatic doors closing.
Short gasps of breath quietly leave you, your nails burrow into the skin of your forearm, you stare at the rain as it pelts at the ground, flooding pot holes and falling into storm drains.
The automatic door opens again, you back up, shifting to the side, as an officer gives you a strange look as he walks past and into the rain.
Your hesitance to proceed into the rain was noticed by a few in the main lobby. Like Kyle, who still stood in his mission uniform, dropping off his reports to the main desk, getting off the elevator to see you staring up at the cloudy sky.
His eyes widening in shock, he's lost in his own world when he begins to take steps towards you, lips parting in disbelief, voice cracking as he breathes out to say, to beg or plead for forgiveness.
The automatic door opens again as you shuffle forwards to try to step outside, he doesn't fully notice your fear of the weather when he speaks.
"(Y/n)..."
You turn at the sound of your name and his eyes flicker to the large scar along your cheek, the red of your eye still, that had changed the color of your iris, maybe permanently. The way you hold your bag tight in your hands as if to shield it from the rain before yourself.
You don't say anything, he hadn't expected you to. You stare at him, surprised to see him, then the expression changes to terror, brows pulling inward and hands sinking into your bag to bring it closer. His heart aching at your reaction to him, his lips pressing together, he doesn't know if she should say another thing. Just let you go.
"(Y/n), I..." he can't help himself as he continues, breathlessly.
You back away from him, out of the building and into the rain. The moment it hits your back, soaking through your shirt, rain hitting the top of your head, down your back, you tense up and spin around.
Kyle's brows furrow, before worriedly witnessing as you curl into yourself instantly, crying out in terror, your hands coming up and over your head. "(Y/n)!"
Realizing what you'd done, your back hits the glass doorway, too late for the doorway to register you wanting to come back inside. You stumble to the corner of the building, just next to the doorway and under the too small gutter to find any shelter from the pelting water at your skin.
A loud sob leaves you, squeezing your eyes shut, you can feel the torture starting again, the unbearable freeze of your limbs, the force of crashing pounds of water along your spine. The screams they would pull from you...
Your torment lasts only a few seconds, suddenly the rain stops, but the sound continues around you. A coat settling around your shoulders and over your head, Kyle's hands on your shoulders, he's yelling over the thunder. "Come on, let's get you out of this. Come on, (Y/n)," he takes your arms. "Let me help you, please!"
"You did this," you cried. "I told you. I told you it wasn't me. But, you kept turning it back on! And then you'd leave it like that and it drove me fucking insane. I'll never be ok again, I can't--" hyperventilating. "Don't touch me, Kyle."
Kyle swallows thickly, head hanging low, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before leaning down to you. "I can't leave you here like this, please, love," he hauls you up to your feet. You shove him back, pressing yourself further into the corner, shaking, "(Y/n)--"
"Don't put your fucking hands on me. What don't you get, huh?" you spat. Pulling off the jacket he'd placed over you, tensing at ever drop of rain that fell over you after, but you toss it back at him. "I don't want anything from you. Never again."
"I'm sorry," Kyle clutches the jacket. "I'm so bloody sorry. I'm sorry for every damn thing I'd ever done to you. I'm sorry we didn't listen. I should've never done that to you. I didn't want to, I just--I thought I was doing the right thing for all of us," his voice breaks and he cries under the rain as his little sister, his family, hatefully stares him down. "I thought you'd give in, that it'd be over as quick as it started! I'm sorry I couldn't trust that you were telling the truth all that time."
"I don't want your apology!" you yell. "Cause you'll never know the same feeling. You'll never understand what you've taken from me. What you've done to me--" hiccupping painfully.
Kyle looks away from you, inhaling with a shudder, reddening eyes are covered as he raises his hands to run over his face.
"Your apologies. Your wishes for forgiveness," you seethe. " You should keep them. They mean nothing to me."
With that, you shove on past him, re-entering the building and rushing down the hallway, you turn the corner away from Kyle. Leaving the distraught man out in the rain, the automatic door sliding closed as he looks on after you.
Part 5 OUT NOW!
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kuroosamuu · 6 months ago
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megumi x reader | warnings: making out | wc: 687
you and megumi decided to keep your relationship a secret. for reasons quite obvious to the two of you, for the current predicament you find yourselves in being one of the main ones.
with the two to of you both being students at jujutsu high, you're with each other more often than not. because of this, you two try to keep your feelings for each other at a minimum and keep anything away to the nosy people around you who would love to tease you about your relationship.
and megumi feels strongly about preventing that from ever happening.
well, that didn't last that long.
It was currently 1am, everyone was sleeping, and you were on your way to megumi's room.
you two did this often, finding the only moment of privacy with one another being in the middle of the night, where no one could interrupt the time you spend together. this was your time to be able to talk to him freely, without worrying about someone else interrupting your conversation or saying something about you two being a bit too close.
so, when you arrive and softly knocked on the door, you felt the relief you always feel when he opens the door, and allow yourself to throw your arms around him.
"missed you."
"you saw me today."
you pull away, pouting at him, "you know what I mean."
"I know, missed you too," he leans down and gives you a quick peck, before you two make your way to his bed to cuddle.
a daily routine at this point.
you lay with your head on his chest, his arm secured around you as you two talk mindlessly about anything and everything.
you end up perching your chin on his chest to look up at him, and before you know it, you lips are on his.
It starts off slow, gentle even, like every other kiss you two share. soon, you place your palm on his chest for leverage as you lift yourself up more in order to deepen the kiss.
megumi sits up slightly, bringing his back to rest on the headboard behind him as your lips move in sync, slowly deepening with each kiss.
you allow your hand that was previously situated on his chest to wander up and over his shoulder, as he takes one hand and place it on your waist.
he brings his other hand to the other side of your waist and moves you to straddle his lap properly now.
the kiss deepens in his new position, allowing yourself to hook your arms around his neck, while his one hand stays on your waist, the other slowly moving up and down your back.
all that is consuming your mind and body is megumi and you don't think of anything else, mind completely taken over by the feeling of his lips against yours.
and he is in the exact same way, hence the reason neither of you heard the door to megumi's room creak open.
and you didn't stop until you hear the crash of something hitting the floor.
you gasp as you part from megumi, throwing yourself off of him as fast as humanly possible and creating as much distance between you two as you could on his small bed.
you turn to look at the source of the sound to see yuji standing at megumi's doorway, whatever in his hand now on the floor, along with his jaw wide open.
the awkward silence between you three lasts for what feels like forever, before megumi finally speaks up.
"don't you know how to knock? what are you doing here."
"I did knock! you didn't reply so I just let myself in..." yuji replies looking between you and megumi, "maybe I shouldn't have..."
"It's not what it looks like," you try to explain weakly.
"I'll just leave you two alone."
yuji runs out of the room, and you look at megumi, the two of you knowing you're going to hear an earful tomorrow from both nobara and gojo, who yuji is definitely telling right now.
so much for keeping your relationship a secret.
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sbcdh · 5 months ago
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"It wasn't one thing, you know, it was like, everything. Everything just kinda happened slow. It wasn't fast. It was slow.
It was, uhh... 1964, I think. LBJ was in office. Yeah, 1964. The government rolled out the whole hypnoeconomics thing in uh, sophomore year. Something like that. I didn't really watch the news, but I remember everyone talking about the election. I remember it being a big deal but, you know, seems like every time the government does something it's a big deal, you know? It's always like, fine. It's always fine.  
 I had just graduated from UC Santa Ana. I had a degree in photography. What do you even do with that? Photography. It was hard at first, shopping a portfolio around, doing weddings. I had a gig going for some real estate company. That was alright. Taking pictures of empty houses for speculators. Something like that. I didn't know the specifics. I was good at it. It's not hard once you know the equipment, and what the client wants. But you get tired of it, you know? You get tired of it.
My mom wasn't the nicest lady. She's my mom but, you know how mom's are. The only thing to do in west Texas was go to church. I was raised really Christian, and Santa Ana was just so different. I didn't know many people. I had a job that didn't feel right, no friends, no family, no church. So I was looking for a church. You got all sortsa stuff out here, you know? You know the Navigators right? That big megachurch? The first chapel was like, a 20 minute drive from student housing. There were always people out preaching in the quad.
It was a girl. Uh, Nadine. Nadine Galt. We had a 101 class together. Math, I think. We really hit it off. She was just funny, you know? She said she was from out of state too, had a really pretty gold cross necklace. I think she polished it. We had similar upbringings you know? Small Town girl, big city, not many friends. That sorta thing. She invited me to a party. A jewelry party.
I asked her "what was that" and she explained the whole concept to me. How she was an independent seller, how she had all these friends, how she was gonna buy us wine and food and show us the stuff she had this month. I liked her. It sounded fun. It was fun.
She said she did that every month. I didn't know too many people, and it was a good way to meet people, you know? I may have paid a bit much for some bracelets, but hey, she was good at selling bracelets. I looked forward to the jewelry parties. I did. Every month I looked forward to them.
I had been going for maybe a year, year and a half, and she asked me if I wanted to become a seller like her. She did it slow, you know, every once in a while she would ask me to stay after the party. I didn't think I could do it. I had a degree in photography, what did I know? But she layed it on thick. Told me I was just what she was looking for. And, well, she said the money was good. I needed money. Or, I had money, but I needed more you know? She made it sound so, well, important. Said we needed to do this, that a market needed competition, you know? That the hypnoeconomists couldn't really track people like us. She said we were "essential to a free financial dreamscape." She made it sound like we were a pair of cowgirls out on the open range together. She said I would be a natural.
And you know what? I was pretty good. At first at least. At first it was just helping out Nadine with her stuff, but she taught me how to talk, introduced me to her distributors, even taught me how to look for new clients. I held a party for some of my clients in real estate. Bought out a whole section of a fancy restaurant and invested in nice cases from the distributor. It didn't go well. I didn't make much profit at all. I think they were mostly pity-buying. I didn't make a cent.
All gold. Yep, all gold. And that wasn't a lie either. It had to be gold, or it wouldn't work.
Nadine went missing in, uh, 67 I think. I was heartbroken. And worried, you know? I was worried sick. Everyone was reaching out, asking if I was alright. Hell, excuse my language, even my mama reached out. Called me on the phone, said I was in her prayers.
The distributor reached out too. Colin. I didn't get another name. Just Colin. Called me one day to express his condolences. He had a nice voice, over the phone. Smooth. Kinda timid, but in a way you liked. I dunno how to describe it. You know what else he told me? He told me I was responsible for 89% of the profits for his channel. Eighty nine. Thinkin back now, I shoulda known that was a bunch of bullshit. He said he wanted to meet with me at the company headquarters in Pasadena. Once I was ready of course. Said he wanted to "talk shop." It was a bright spot, you know? A bright spot in a scary and lonely time. I went. Got a hotel and everything.
What was it like? You mean like what happened?...oh,  you mean like, the inside? Like of the building?
You know what? Now that I think about it. Weird. It was weird as hell. Lotsa gold and concrete. Like the jewelery. It was like every room was like, I dunno. It was like they were too big and too small at the same time. And there was a LOT of gold, in all sortsa patterns.
No. Yeah. Yeah I'm okay, I can talk about it. I'm okay to talk about it. I wasn't there long. I've heard the stories, you know. I don't know what you know, you probably know more than me, being the government and all, but lemme say that if you heard a story about something happening in 11414, it's probably true.
Anyways, Colin met me in his office. No windows. We talked shop. They asked me to arrive early and I skipped breakfast to get there on time and, it seems like every time I tried to bring up lunch he would wave it down. I had to damn near demand to get up for lunch. He invited me up to the cafeteria. The nice one, the one the distributors got to eat at.
It was nice, like, real nice. The plates had those same gold patterns on them. It was after that-
The pattern? Uh, I'll try, do you have a pen? It was really complicated. I'll do my best. It had all these criss-crossing... Hm? Yeah. Yeah you know what? That's exactly what it looked like.
Yeah, you know? I actually did ask him. I asked him about the pattern and he just kinda looked at me like I was in on a joke and said put a finger to his lips and he tapped on the back of his head. You know, where they put the plugs. And he said "you know, so they can't listen."
Yeah he offered to let me try one. He got all quiet, brought me to the lounge behind some curtains. Yeah they had the gold thing too. Started talking like he had a secret. He must've had fifty, sixty pills in a fancy little case that had the same pattern on it.
No I wasn't surprised. How else would they make that much money without hypnoregulation? It was kind of an open secret, you know? I didn't want any of that. But you can't say no, you know? Then you're implicated. You can't leave. I agreed to take one.
I still think about that, you know? How I got out of that. What a dodged bullet. Oh my god. It's kinda embarrassing, now that I gotta say so, but when I was little, I used to do magic. You know, card tricks, sleight of hand, all that stuff. I palmed the damn thing. Slipped it right into my pocket.
I sat there for a bit. Tried to copy him, you know. The lounge had a bunch of sub-finantial cortical wires hidden in the coffee table. He gave me one and told me to watch what he did while he fed it up his nose into his head. I sat there for a bit, trying to stay calm. His eyes rolled into the back of his head and he had the gold scalero, uh, scaleri, no, uh the white parts of his eyes...
Scalera! That's it. They were gold and everything.
I didn't know he would convulse so much. I thought something might've been wrong, but eventually they died down. I gotta say, I was so damn scared I couldn't move. I coulda been there for hours. I probably was.
I have a good memory. So eventually I worked up the courage and just...walked out.
Yeah. I walked out. You walk like you're supposed to be there, and you're kinda mad, you know? Like you're late for something and you can't talk right now. It's all about confidence. Nobody hassles you if you look like you know where you're going. I even said thank you to the secretary in the lobby. Nadine taught me that you know. It's all about confidence.
I made it to my car, got the engine going, and the moment 11414 was out of my rear view mirror I just started crying. Cried myself to fits. I didn't even know at the time. What was it? Six weeks later? How many dead?
Yeah, too many. Too many. I guess it doesn't matter.
I drove to a McDonald's for some food and at some point I turned on the radio. You know what was playing?
Yeah. It was that fucking Tremeloes song. You know the one."
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amaranthineghost · 1 year ago
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hi! could u write a fic where lando and the reader were fucking and lando takes his phone out halfway through (to take a photo for himself) but accidentally gets it posted on his instagram story and they only find out in the morning idk i just thought this would be funny af
OOPS? ( lando norris. )
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lando norris x reader
to commemorate the sight in front of him, he snaps a picture on his phone without realizing he's just posted it for millions to see.
warnings: smut
authors note: I really liked writing this!!! it's a bit shorter than usual, but I enjoyed it a lot so thanks anon!!! <333
HE DIDN'T KNOW HOW HE DID IT. maybe he was just in the haze of sex, buried deep in her cunt with her leg over his shoulder, her other around his lower back pulling him in further.
he was hovering over her, hand pressed against her mouth as strings of muffled moans spilled from her lips, warm tears against his skin. god, she looked so good, too good. he just wanted to remember how fucked out her expression was.
leaning over to the nightstand, slowing his thrusts ever so much as he clutched his phone, flash on to compensate for the darkness of the bedroom. he snapped the photo, throwing the phone to the side, face side up.
he turned his focus back to the messy masterpiece in front of him, returning to the pace he had set before.
he pulled his hand away from her mouth to hear her symphony of moans, music to his ears. his hand took its place on her neck.
lando norris has posted to his story
he was so lost in the moment, he should've realized sooner the mistake he made. he should've realized at the instant texts that lit up his screen because who would be texting him this late?
all he did was flip over the phone, ignoring whatever notified him as he pulled her leg off his shoulder, pushed her leg down from his back. he fell beside her, prompting her to crawl across him, straddling him weakly as his hands settled on her hips.
fuck, she looked so good from this angle. hair messy from the pillows, face red from the tears down her cheeks, but also flushed from how hard he fucked her. he had already coaxed one orgasm ouf of her.
she sank down on his cock, causing him to curse under his breath with praise, “fuck, such a good girl.” his hands clawed into the flesh of her hips, guiding her pace once he saw her struggle.
the view was immaculate, he could've came at the sight of her tits bouncing up and down as she slid on his cock alone. it was salivating.
his hands left her hips to grasp her breasts, and he couldn't care if her pace faltered because everything felt too good in the moment.
if only they knew.
he planted his feet firmly against the bed, grasping her sides again as he lifted his hips to meet her halfway. it was rough, causing her to steady herself with her hands against his chest as he thrusted up and forced her hips down. his cock buried deep in her brought her over the edge so easily as tears fell from her face onto the bare skin of his chest.
she collapsed against his chest as his cock sank into her, feeling the warmth of his seed inside her cunt. she groaned against his chest as his arm spread across her bare back and pressed a kiss to her hair. the tears from her face wet his skin.
“did so good, baby,” he cooed, running fingers across her flesh as she hummed into his chest.
they laid together for a while before going and cleaning up. since it was already late in the night, they got back into bed and fell asleep.
when lando awoke the next morning, his phone was nearly dead and hundreds of texts and missed calls from his friends was the cause. hot to the touch, he carefully held his phone, brows furrowed as he laid on his side, back to his girlfriend, who was still fast asleep on the other side of the bed.
first, he opened the texts from his friend, max, who’s messages were in all caps. his eyes widened at the content, squinting at the screen in disbelief. no way he was that stupid, no the photo he took was in his camera roll—no it wasn't.
he discovered that, unfortunately, the photo he had taken was posted to his Instagram story, and it hadn't been taken down.
if it weren't for the circumstances, he could've stared at the photo all day because it was truly that good, but first he had to get rid of the post—and get the photo into his camera roll.
he nearly jumped out of his skin when she stirred in her sleep, now right against his back with her cheek pressed to his bare skin.
“morning,” she groaned and he mumbled back. she moved to rest her head on his shoulder, squinting to see what was on his phone screen, “why’re you on your phone so early?”
“i'm sorry.” he gulped, turning his head to watch the expression knot on her face, mostly confusion.
she sat up, leaning on her arm as she practically hovered over him, “lando, what did you do?”
“i’m so sorry,” was all he could say.
“lando,” she paused, an underlying tone of irritation laced in her voice as she emphasized her words, “what did you do?”
he glanced back at his phone, not even trying to hide the guilty expression written all over his face. she snatched the phone from his hand, and he didn't stop her. he covered his face with his hands, rubbing his eyes before leaving them to cover the lower half of his face as he watched her face.
“what the fuck?” she shoved his shoulder.
“i didn't mean to!” he sat up, throwing his hands up before running them through his messy curls, “i don't know how i did it.”
“oh my god,”she muttered under her breath, rubbing her temples as she hunched over the phone, “i’m deleting it.”
“wait–” his hand touched hers, he bit his lip, “at least save it to my photos–ow!”
she hit the backside of his head at the idiocy of his words. she exhaled deeply, anger taking over her body. of course, he didn't care as much as she did. he wasn't in the photo at all to begin with and this wouldn't affect his career as deeply as it would affect hers.
“why? so you can post it somewhere else? text it to your friends?” she raised her voice, groaning out in frustration.
“baby, calm down–” he tenderly placed a hand on her shoulder, which she shrugged off.
“how can i calm down, lando?” she threw his phone down on the bedding, falling back down onto the bed with her hands covering her face in shame. now that picture is all everyone will ever see her as, all thanks to her idiot of a boyfriend.
he grabbed his phone back, seeing the photo had been taken down from his story, but they both knew that image would be circling the internet for a long time.
“at least the photo didn't show anything,” he tried to make light of the situation, but it was to no avail as she spat back with venom in her tone.
“you don't even care about the photo because you aren't the one in it, lando.” she scoffed.
“i’m sorry, okay?” he turned to her, “i really didn't mean to, you know i would never do that.”
she sighed, “i know, but i’m still mad, lan.”
“i know, darling,” he laid beside her on his side, looking at her side profile as she stared at the ceiling, “you have every right to be mad.”
she stayed silent, and he didn't know if it was a good or bad thing.
he gulped again, speaking up, “and i promise to never take a photo of you when we're fucking ever again.”
a laugh forced it's way past her lips, “oh, please we both know you'll try and fail,” she said with a smile on her lips, shaking her head.
“okay, yeah, but i promise i’ll triple check it's not in any social media post,” he flipped over onto his stomach, propped up by his elbows with his pinky held out. she took it and the promise was made. the situation dealt with, for the most part.
“did you happen to save the photo though–ow, okay!”
taglist (found here): @poppyflower-22 @sapphiccloud @slut4lrh @kaa12 @taylorslovesswifties13 @sbella13 @nhlfs @beskardroids @hiireadstuff @lorenica @delululeclerc @c-losur3 @casperlikej
proofread by @foreveralbon <333
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talaok · 1 year ago
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A gentleman
This is my gift to @lucyeyelesbarrow for the Pedrostories Secret Santa event💖
Pairing: bfd!Joel Miller x f!reader
Summary: Your boyfriend is a good guy, but he's not so good at sex, but thankfully, his dad makes up for it
Warnings: smut| Cheating, kinda exhibitionism, oral sex (f receiving), a bit of fingering, unprotected p in v sex, creampie, no use of y/n just overuse of pet names, no use of Joel either, just Mr. Miller and sir (so naturally we've got a bit of a sir kink).
a/n: babe you said slut by Taylor and i ran with it. also, this didn't turn out as good as I wanted, but nevertheless, I hope you'll like it. And huge thanks to @decembermidnight cause this idea is basically (completely) hers so give her some love or smth.
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Jason was a good guy,
he was such a good guy, always so kind, always gentle and respectful... everything any girl could ever dream of, right?
wrong
He should have been, he really should have been the perfect man, but he wasn't.
He wasn't a man, he was just a boy
A really nice, sweet, cute boy that had just one, little, big problem... he fucked like one.
He fucked like he was scared of breaking you, actually, no he didn't fuck at all... he made love, which would have been fine... if it wasn't for the fact that he wasn't any good at it.
Every time you had sex he lasted no more than a few minutes (on his good days) and it was always just the same, always missionary, always slow and breathy and just not... right.
And it's not like you hadn't tried, god knows how many times you had, you tried changing positions, switching up his thrusting method, or even asking him to go down on you, but the outcome was always the same... you were left unsatisfied, every. single time.
You had even gone as far as starting to wonder if perhaps the problem was you, but then again every time you were alone everything worked just fine.
And as perfect as he was, there's only as much a girl can take.
You needed sex, the real kind, you needed to get fucked good, by a man who didn't need instructions, by someone who wasn't afraid to take what he wanted, by a man, you needed a real man.
And perhaps you'd always had one in mind.
You were in the kitchen, the fridge open, the cool air hardening your nipples, just a tiny white tank top on you, no bra, only a pair of panties.
You came down here to get a drink, but your focus had shifted to your fingers beneath your panties, drawing fast circles on your clit.
And yes it was pathetic, masturbating in a kitchen that wasn't even yours, but your body was desperate for that orgasm your boyfriend had deprived you of not even 10 minutes ago.
You were caging your bottom lip between your teeth, trying not to make a sound, but as all your emphasis went there, you must have stopped listening for anyone coming and missed the footsteps stomping down the stairs.
"I thought you'd be aslee-" 
his eyes widened as he finally took you in
"shit I'm sorry darlin'-" he apologized, his eyes diverting a moment too late, only after they had taken you in completely, only after they had taken a good glimpse of your tits, and of the hand in your underwear.
To say you were red was an understatement.
He was there, the man you were just thinking of (although you had tried to refrain) was there, right in front of you, in all his broadness and glory, looking every bit of hot as ever,
him, your boyfriend's dad, 
Mr. Miller had just caught you masturbating while standing in his kitchen.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't-I was just-I needed water and I-"
You finally rushed your trembling fingers out of your panties, your chest heaving and your voice breaking.
"No need to apologize sweetheart" he shook his head, his gaze finding yours "'s alright"
And although you were half naked, his eyes remained on yours.
Because that's how he was, that's how Mr. Miller was,
He was a gentleman,
In a world of boys, he was a gentleman.
Just like that time he caught you just out of the shower, just as every time he wouldn't let you open your own door, not on his watch, just as every dinner, every expense, every single thing, was his treat, and he didn't need a thank you, he did it because that's simply how he did things, how he'd been taught to treat women.
You watched each other for a moment, you panicking, him as calm as ever, and only after a good minute, did you finally feel brave enough to say something,
"I-I think I'll go-"
He frowned, "didn't you come here to get a drink?"
You swallowed, realizing your hands were empty "I-I did, you're right"
You opened the fridge again, and to the demise of your heart, he stepped closer, watching you like a hawk from above, and stealing all the air out of your lungs.
"What were you doing sweetheart?"
You swore you could have started crying right there and then.
Did he really just ask that?
Why the fuck would he ever ask that?
"I-I wasn't- I wasn't doing anything, Mr. Miller"
He tried to hide the smirk crawling on his lips, but a shadow of it still appeared
"now we both know that ain't true, darlin'" he smiled, as you took a bottle of water and closed the fridge to try and keep your brain occupied by something else other than this fucking man.
You took a deep breath, looking up at him.
Your bottom lip was between your front teeth, and with his thumb, he freed it, his hand lingering on your chin.
"there's no need to be shy" he murmured, his voice as sweet as honey "I just wanna help"
And as always, as always his touch melted you completely, like ice in the August sun.
"M-Mr. Miller-"
"yes, doll?"
only hearing him call you that made your breathing hitch.
"I..."
"just tell me," his voice was as low and hot as it could be "I won't judge"
And then, for some reason, you did, You told him the truth.
maybe he had put a spell on you, or maybe, just maybe, you would have done anything this man asked for.
"I was- I was touching myself"
But of course he knew, you could see it all over his face as he nodded, his eyes now a shade darker.
"and why's that?" he asked, stepping an inch closer,
you took a step back to get out of his penetrating aura, just to realize he had confined you between the table and his body with nowhere else to go.
"my son's just upstairs" he continued, his eyes scrutinizing every inch of your face "Couldn't he have helped with that?" 
You gulped as his fingers gently moved some hair out of your face, making you shiver altogether
"I know if I were him, I would want nothing more than to do just that" he murmured "I would want to pleasure you in any way I could" and then, as if he'd gotten back to himself, to the respectful gentleman you'd always known, he dropped his hand, "so why were you touching yourself, sweetheart?"
What were you supposed to say?
That his son couldn't do it?
That in 3 months of dating, he'd made you come a total of 0 times?
Now that's not really a conversation you wanted to have with his father, was it?
"I was just- I- I don't know Mr. Miller" you lied
But he saw right through you, his head shaking in disapproval
"but you do know, doll" he urged "There's gotta be a reason"
And then it clicked.
He knew. Somehow he fucking knew.
"I-I-" you stuttered "It's just that Jason... he- he can't-"
but you couldn't end that sentence, how could you ever?
So of course, he did it for you.
"He can't make you come"
And the darkness was back again, the gentleman long gone.
"ain't that right?"
You could only offer a shy nod
"a pretty thing like you..." he murmured, his breath tickling your skin as he leaned closer, "and he's not taking care of you..." he tsked "Now that's a shame"
his hands were on your waist, holding you in place.
"I thought I'd taught him how to treat a woman... guess I was wrong" he shook his head "I mean look at you," he murmured "he should be making you come until you can't take it anymore"
"Mr. Miller-" you whimpered
"yes sugar"
"please" you begged, not exactly knowing for what
"Please what?" he asked, his right hand stroking your sides "you want somethin' from me?"
"I-I" you stumbled over your own words, not knowing how to get them out "Could you- could you please do it?"
He smirked properly at that, his left hand lowering down your belly
"do what?"
"you know" you breathed "You know what"
He inhaled your scent, his eyes still focused on yours "Say it" he ordered "Say it and I'll do it"
And what could you have done, if not exactly what he'd just said
"Please Mr. Miller" you pleaded "please make me come"
His fingers were beneath your panties before you could get another word out.
"Ah-" you gasped
"shhh" he shushed you, "Don't worry darlin'" he murmured "I'm here, I'll take care of you" he said, his big hand cupping your whole pussy
"look at that" he grinned, his mouth ghosting yours "she's already wet f'me”
A gasp fled your throat again as his finger seeped between your folds, gathering your slick and teasing your hole just to travel up to your clit
“Mmm” he hummed “so wet doll” he shook his head, smiling devilishly “are you always like this for me?” he asked, “For your boyfriend’s father?“
And although the fact that you could feel his hard cock against your thighs made that taunt more than a little hypocritical, you still couldn’t help but feel a little ashamed.
“Answer me” he urged, his lips now grazing yours
“Yes” you confessed, your voice nothing more than a whisper “I-I am Mr. Miller”
He groaned at that
He knew it was wrong, that everything about this was wrong, but he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about this, if he said hearing you call him Mr. Miller with that sweet voice of yours every day didn't make his cock half hard, if he said that from the moment he met you, he hadn't been jealous of his own son.
"here's how this is gonna work sweetheart" he breathed, his fingers gripping the edge of your panties "I'm gonna taste you now... because fuck me, but I need to-" he explained, slowly lowering your underwear "And you..." he smiled, your panties suddenly on the ground "you're gonna be a good girl and stay quiet" 
His lips lowered from right next to your ear, onto your pulse point
"Can you do that f'me?"
A little squeak left your mouth, and a deep chuckle rumbled from his chest
"Can you be a good girl f'me, doll?"
You didn't trust yourself with words, so all you did was nod
"good" he hummed, his lips on your clavicle "Now get on the table"
And so you did, you hopped on the table, and he kneeled before you, his hands on your thighs.
"Spread your legs sugar" he said, having you obliging immediately
A soft appreciative sound erupted from his throat.
"prettiest pussy I've ever seen" he purred, leaning closer to it "on the prettiest girl I've ever seen"
Your belly was moving up and down in sync with your erratic breathing, but he didn't seem to care, his only focus was between your legs.
he looked as if he did this every day, as if fucking his son's girlfriend was an everyday thing.
He started off slow, his lips meeting the inside of your thighs, then your mound, then your lips, and then, just when you felt a moment away from bursting, his tongue came to play, as he licked between your folds without care, groaning in pleasure at the taste of you.
"Delicious" he hummed "You're fucking delicious doll" he looked at you, continuing to do so even when his hands gripped your thighs, and his talented muscle teased your hole, making you gasp and forcing your right hand to his hair.
"Does he do this?" he couldn't stop himself from asking "Does he eat this pretty pussy sweetheart?"
"n-no" you managed to whisper as he continued his work, now savoring you entirely while deliberately avoiding your clit.
"Now that's just wrong," he said, his eyes unfocusing from yours and lowering to your heat for a moment "look at that" he murmured, watching mesmerized as your juices drenched his mouth "I could eat this pussy for every meal"
And that was it, he was done with teasing all of a sudden, his lips were on your clit, sucking it deliciously as fingers you didn't even notice having gone from your leg thrust into you with ease.
"O-Oh s-shit" you moaned, although trying not to do so.
"quiet sweetheart" he shushed you, going back to his work in a moment
His fingers were now curling upwards, finding that spot that made you see stars like he knew your body better than yourself, or certainly, better than his son.
His tongue was alternating between lapping at your clit and sucking on it, and he expected you to not make a sound? now that was just impossible.
"oh my god" you gripped his hair, his fingers speeding up "o-oh my god-Mr. Miller- i-it feels so good"
"I know it does" he answered "I can feel it, sweetheart"
And then he was back at work, and as you watched enchanted how perfect he looked between your thighs, his hair a mess, his eyes so dark they didn't even seem brown anymore... you felt it, you felt the orgasm approach faster than it ever had, embarrassingly fast one could say, but then again, it certainly wasn't your fault, Mr. Miller knew what he was doing.
"I-I think-" you cried
"I know" he didn't need you to finish "Let go f'me, doll"
And so you did, you bit your lip and threw your head back as an orgasm powerful enough to kill you took over your body, leaving you a whimpering, wobbly mess.
"fucking delicious" he groaned, selfishly licking your core once again before he was back up to you, watching as you breathed heavily into the air.
"felt good?"
"yeah," you smiled mindlessly "felt amazing Mr. Miller"
"good enough to want another one?"
You didn't need to think twice
"yes" you breathed, one of your arms going between his neck as you begged him, while the other found the bulge in his boxers "please" you swallowed "Please fuck me"
"you want my cock?" he asked, already freeing it from his briefs "is that it?"
"yes," you whimpered, 
"how much?"
"a lot" you promised "I want it so much Mr. Miller, please"
"yeah?" he taunted, positioning it at your entrance
"yeah-" you managed before he had pushed into you, making such a feeling erupt in you that you forgot all about your boyfriend upstairs and cried loudly because fuck it, but he was so fucking big.
His hand covered your mouth before you had even realized what had happened.
"I thought you said you were gonna be good" 
Your eyes widened as your pussy still tried to accommodate the importance of him
A muffled "I'm sorry" made it to his ears
"I wouldn't wanna have to stop"
"no" you begged immediately "no please don't stop" You shook your head, so desperate you would have felt pathetic if it wasn't that you weren't thinking about anything anymore besides your pleasure, besides him, besides this, whatever it was.
"if I take this off you you'll be quiet?" he asked, nodding to his hand
"yes," you nodded "yes, sir, please"
Sir?
Fuck
If his cock could have gotten harder it would have.
"alright then" he conceded, taking his hand away "Can I move sweetheart?"
"mh-mh" you hummed, nodding eagerly
a soft grin spread over his face at that, but before you could fully take in the beauty of it, of him, of his patchy salt and pepper beard and pink lips, he had done as you asked, and started moving
"fuck" you whimpered "y-you're so big"
The implication behind your words hit you only after having pronounced them, but he was kind enough not to comment on it.
"and yet you're taking me all like a good girl" he groaned "taking all of my cock inside this tight little pussy of yours"
His right hand got rid of your tank top, pulling it down until your boobs spilled from it so he could grab and grope at them freely while his thrusts got faster, and somehow, somehow even fucking deeper, and you were just- god you were in another universe, and right when you shut your eyes, your forehead falling to his in bliss, another moan escaped you, and his hand found your lips again
"What did I tell you sweetheart?" he grunted, his pace not slowing down "I need you to stay quiet" he explained again "I need you to be good and not make a sound so I can fuck you like you nee-"
"Babe?"
Your heart skipped a beat.
It was his voice, your boyfriend's voice, coming from upstairs
"babe, is everything alright?"
Your eyes widened and his movements stopped as you stared into each other's eyes for a moment
What do I do? What do I do? what the fuck do I do?
"answer him," Joel said, freeing your mouth without any further explanation.
"I-" you mumbled
"do it sweetheart, or he's gonna come down here, and I don't think either of us want that"
And so of course, you did
"I-I'm fine!" you yelled
"are you sure?"
And just when you were about to answer, his fingers materialized on your clit, circling it.
You gasped, widening your eyes at him 
"answer" he commanded, not stopping, the opposite actually, starting his thrusts again "Answer him doll"
"b-but"
"just do it" he murmured "Tell him you're sure"
You gulped, breathing heavily, 
"I'm sure!" 
"Ok"
And just like that, as if it were a miracle, Jason stopped his questioning, and you hid your face into the crook of Joel's neck, biting his skin as his pace fastened again, making that fucking feeling his son couldn't create take over your whole belly again.
"Mr Miller- oh my god" you cried, actual tears threatening to spill your eyes at the feeling
"shh" he cooed "I know sweetheart I know" he felt your walls tighten around him as the fingers in your hair gripped his locks harder "there we go," he grunted, his cock so deep inside of you you could feel it in your belly "that's all you needed wasn't it?" he asked " for someone to abuse this little pussy" he groaned, "for me, for me to fuck you like you deserve"
his lips were just before yours, not even an inch distancing you from a kiss, and yet, you weren't gonna cross that line, not today.
"yes" you moaned lowly "yes sir, yes"
"fuck" he groaned "you feel so good sweetheart, squeezing me so good... such a good girl"
"oh" you moaned, back into his neck "s-shit"
"'s ok" he purred, his fingers and hips working relentlessly to destroy you completely "'s ok sweetheart just-"
"Babe, can you bring me some water too?"
And if before Joel had stopped, it wasn't even remotely in his plans now. There you were, on the verge of an orgasm, and he was supposed to stop? no fucking way
He did the opposite, he started going harder, the table shifting on the floor.
You gasped and moaned before you finally freed your mouth from your neck, clinging to him as you answered
"Yes!" you screamed, hoping the pure pleasure behind your words wouldn't be hearable "Yes! I-I'm c-coming!"
"Yeah" he groaned into your ear "Yeah you are sweetheart" he purred, completely drowning out whatever response Jason gave you "Now give it to me, come all over my cock like a good girl"
And just like that, white pure bliss washed over you, and for a moment you were somewhere else, heaven, or hell more probably, but another universe for sure.
And you only came back when Joel's grunts sounded in your ears, when his thrusts got more sloppy, when you answered the words "Where do you want it?" with a simple "inside", and then finally, you fully came back to earth when he did, when he filled you up to the brim, remaining still deep inside you so none of it went to waste.
"fuck" he groaned after a while, finally pulling out of you to meet your eyes.
"Mr. Miller-"
You were waiting for the guilt to take over you, but somehow, for whatever reason, it still hadn't, and he felt exactly the same
"Babe?"
"shit" you gasped, getting off the table to put your panties back on.
"you need to go doll" Joel murmured, helping you put your tank top back into place
"Mr. Miller..." you murmured, your voice as shaky as your legs "I've got your come running down my thighs"
A soft smirk pulled at his lips
"should have thought of that before you said you wanted it inside" he taunted, his hands on your waist "or before you decided to touch yourself in my kitchen, sweetheart"
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r0-boat · 4 months ago
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Gooner!Belphegor magic pocket pussy Drabble
Cw: masturbation, dubcon.
Gn!reader (Even if you don't have the parts the reader can still feel it ✨magically✨
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His pupils dilated holding the toy in his hand. It wasn't just an ordinary toy. He had waited months for this magical toy from Tartaros.
A pocket pussy that syncs It's opening to match any person he chooses. With manual excruciatingly using the little bits DNA from strands of hair that fell from your pretty little head the last time you slept in his bed and other bothersome labor setting the damn thing up so it binds to you, It's finally ready.
"This toy better be far worth the hassle I had to endure," Belphegor mutter does he pressed his finger against the slit of the toy. He truly hopes You could feel his fingers working you open from wherever you are. He licks his lips His eyes fluttering clothes as he runs his tongue across the silicone lips.
Meanwhile, You were tagging along with not only Satan but the rest of the kings for a meeting.
"So sad that Belphegor can't attended today..." Asmodeus smirks giving Satan a wink who's flipping him off in response.
"Good riddance I say, if I had to hear One more meeting of snoring I would have closed off his throat." Leviathan mumbled.
You smile as you sit in your usual seat kicking your feet, Even though you had nothing to do with these meetings The Kings were still nice enough to have you join each one.
It was a day like any other.
Until...
A wet warm feeling caresses your core. You gasp as you swallow a moan. Lucifer's sharp eyes catches your sharp noise "Everything all right?"
" Y-yeah." Was all you could muster.
feeling that's sweet familiar taste of human arousal on his tongue he shutters "Haaa-haha This thing can even replicate your taste. Now I know it's working..."
"fuck... No more waiting... I need it!"
Lazily pushing his robes off on revealing his hard cock He strokes his shaft with one hand maneuvering his tip till it pushes against the opening as he works it open. "Fuck! Replicating your tightness too... This might be my new favorite toy." Belphegor mumbles forcing his cock deeper inside the toy.
You felt something hard and warm fill somewhere between your legs You didn't even have time to process where and how before this mysterious feeling begin to move in and out.
There was no mistaking what this feeling was. Which was deeply confusing since you were in the middle of a meeting and not being fucked by any of the kings present. The size, girth, and even the speed of the thrusts were familiar, but you couldn't place your finger on where you had felt this before. Given how fast thrusting motions began to speed up, it was so hard to think. Before you knew it, you clenched your teeth, trying so hard not to scream out in the middle of the six other kings in the room.
Your hand balling your twitching fingers into a fist trying to stop yourself from going underneath your pants.
His breath shook as he finally took his cock out of the toy His tip rubbing circles around The stretched silicone slit. "Hehehe, rest up while you can ma sweet lil' toy cuz I'm not done with you yet~"
He wonders what you're doing. He knows that there's a meeting going on right now. He wonders if you're there.
"I wonder... I wonder you like getting fucked by me in front of all the other demons that want you."
Belphegor cummed his messy hair falling in front of his eyes as he grinded his shaft against the lips of the toy. "betcha do horny slut!"
Even though you weren't there to write him or suck him off till his balls burst, The idea of fucking you anywhere he wished made his cock twitch and drool with precum.
Belphegor hummed getting his other hand to swipe at the precum drooling from his head. He takes his two fingers and slides them inside. "Ya feel that? That's what you do to me."
You finally mustered all your strength when the thrusts start to slow You slammed your fist down on the table catching everyone's attention their eyes wide at the sudden outburst "I'M GOING TO THE BATHROOM!"
Shit, you did not need to yell that loud... Now, everyone looked worried, But you didn't care because if you had stayed a second longer, you would have come right then and there in your pants. While, everyone was watching. You've never run so fast out of the meeting room.
Slamming and locking your door to your bedroom Your nails dig into the sheets trying so hard to hold back any noise as you brace yourself as the thrusting begin again.
Belphegor His eyes will back as he pounds it over and over into the flashlight as fast as he could go. He could feel the toy work it's magic tightening and pulsating just like how a cunt would; now your cunt. He could feel you cum with every tight squeeeeze.
If he thought fucking you was addicting then treating you like a fleshlight was like drugs.
As much as he wanted to use this toy for hours and hours on end. Which believe him he would.
Use it and overfill your new cunt, make feels so full when you're in fact empty. Maybe he would even fill it up to the brim and make sure it holds It aaall in So you could feel full all day.
As a demon known for breaking his toys He had to hold back. Which realization made him click his tongue. But it was true, He didn't know how much a human could take this toy was made intended for devils after all. So might as well finish inside it and store it away for later.
As much as he wanted to keeps stroking his hand was getting tired. In a last ditch effort to cum He shuffled in his bed his hair silk robes and sheet sticking to a sweaty body. He put the pocket pussy in between two pillows. As much as he hated the hassle of actually doing sex. He needed to have you feel him fuck you.
His unrestrained moans feel his bedroom as he drills his cock deeper with each thrust into the toy. Making sure he stoled his hips as deep as he could before exploding. Making sure He failed the toy to the brim.
He was nowhere near satisfied, And he knew he'll be returning to the toy again for right now, exhaustion hit him all at once. He placed his toy upright on the nightstand. He smiled, knowing that you'll feel all his cum deep inside for a while before drifting off to sleep.
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dilf-docs · 2 months ago
Text
Saturday But in Your Sunday Best
bfd!joel miller x younger fem!reader
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summary: joel has a co-worker's wedding in las vegas. everything that can go wrong, does.
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap, smut, p. in v., creampie, oral (f. and m. receiving), breast play, fingering, dacryphilia, degradation kink, ANGST (as in i've suffered so will my characters. this wasn't at all what i had envisioned at first for this part), hurt/comfort, a bit of fluff (that's new), pls be nice this writer's block shot me in the foot
word count: 11,121 words
side note: sorry this took so long. between movie watching for the oscars, my other works, midterms, pedro pascal horny hours, my wattpad fic, the max fic you citizens let flop (ĉüřşę ÿoụ āĺļ), the brat taming fic that made numbers among my oomfs on twitter, a very shitty date (the situational irony of letting a man ruin my women's day) a ptwt fic gc in twitter (love u frens), and uni again, i let the ttdik series collect dust, my bad. as compensation, take this girthy chapter altho it makes me kinda insecure IDK. this is why i don't do series okay!! i'm my worst enemy and i fear procrastination is a chronical disease of mine atp
part: prev | masterlist | next
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What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas
His foot taps anxiously against the marble floor, sound drowned by the bustling crowd.
People come and go. Some hug, others cry. And Joel? Well, he's just waiting for you to come.
He checks his watch, the one Sarah gifted him, and sighs. Should've known better.
It's been two months since the pregnancy scare, and ever since then, you have put a bit of a distance between yourselves.
It was slow, gradual: first the excuses then nights were you wouldn't stay or ask him to. And, even if your affair was that, just an affair, he missed sleeping in the warmth of your embrace. He also missed the way your nose would crinkle when you laughed. You didn't laugh that often anymore, and if you did, it sounded like you were holding in: as if you were afraid to let loose and let him see through you. And to be honest, it was killing him.
So when he reached out to you for this, he should've expected for you to say no. That you wouldn't show up after that I'll see if I'm free text: no, Joel Miller simply shouldn't have harbored that much hope for his daughter's bestfriend he happened to be banging.
If he hadn't confirmed his invitation, he'd probably gone home and layed down. Watch some garbage TV with Sarah and some beer in hand, but here he was, like a lonely loser, luggage in hand.
(Sarah helped him pack. He didn't even know what to wear to a wedding, and then she showed up with his old suit-- that still fit, somehow, albeit a bit more tight, from the dry cleaning. Joel would be lost without her)
The speaker announces his flight is about to leave. Joel gets up, trying not to be dissappointed about the whole thing. He's got no right to, after all.
"Joel?"
He'd end up breaking his neck by how fast he turned.
There you are, and it's like the weight he wasn't aware of, settling on his chest, had been removed.
"You made it" is the first thing that makes it out of his lips.
You softly laugh, "Hello, Joel"
He gets closer to you, slowly, like if he where to do it faster, he'd scare you off. Or you'd be gone, as if a dream.
(It'd be a nightmare, though, because you wouldn't be here)
"Sorry. I-" he cuts off, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. There's some tension lingering in the air, the same when you left his house a week ago. Joel had been too much of a coward to invite you then, rather hiding behind a screen.
But now you were here.
"I didn't think you'd come" he says after a beat of silence.
You tilt your head to the side, eyebrow up as if you hadn't been acting weird at all.
"Why wouldn't I?"
(Because it seems like being in the same room as me tires you. That your eyes don't shine anymore, and the starry sky looks like a storm when you dare search my gaze as we fuck. Every time you breath, its like breathing the same air as me burns)
He rather not press, so instead, he says:
"I'm jus' glad ya' came. 'S all"
You nod, not adding anything at all. Then, both you walk to your gate, side by side in silence, the same that had seemed to seep inside your romance for the past weeks.
Well, romance was definitely a stretch. An affair seemed more like it.
Of course, you're aware the change it's on you. It would've been dumb of you to think Joel wouldn't notice your withdrawal, or how more often than not you'd be stuck in your head. But still, he didn't comment on it, and like you, danced around the subject, afraid for different reasons as yours. Or the same. Yet, you'll never know. No, you're aware you both are too stubborn, and that whatever it started on that day, had settled in between like a burning flame.
(Had you been engulfed by the fire yet?)
You try not to think about it. After all, you had the option not to come. But a weekend away in Las Vegas after midterms? Too tempting to let go.
(And it's not like images of a stood up Joel in the airport, looking miserable, had made you restless the last couple of days after his text)
"Ya' can take the window" he says, even if it's his seat.
He knows you're nervous about flying, a little detail that came up during a post-sex small talk.
(What're you're dreams? Joel asked. You had answered that you'd love to travel the world after graduating, but that you had a fear for flying, despite having only done it once. It may have been because the first time you did, it was to fly for your grandma's funeral. Perhaps it was by association then, that the bad feelings about boarding a plane could be related to that)
"Thanks" you mumble, sitting down. You're avoiding his gaze, but know he's looking at you.
"What?" a little harsher than intended.
He looks taken back, looking at his lap as he let's out a soft whisper, sheepishly:
"Nothin'. Jus' thinkin' you look pretty today"
A light blush creeps up your cheeks as you huff out a Whatever.
Joel let's a breath of relief out his tight chest and allows himself to smile.
(At least, he's still got an effect on you)
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The wedding Joel was supposed to attend is in the Ángel De La Guarda cathedral. You'd be staying nearby, at a hotel room Joel's coworker had paid for, the same where the reception would take place.
Being in the same room as Joel one night should be the least of your worries, but then the space is even smaller than it was supposed to (given by Joel's cursing as he paced around, anxiously), and the strain of your relationship settles in the air, physically so, tight around your throat.
Then, it's the bed issue: there's only one. It's not like you haven't slept in the same bed before, obviously, but there's a certain dread deep in your stomach about sharing the enclosed space when you're at your most vulnerable. He moves around a lot during night, and something tells you you'd wake up to his strong arms and hot breath fanning over your neck, hairs rising at the proximity, making it harded to calm your heart.
"You okay?" he's asking, dropping the bags in a corner.
"At what time is the wedding?" you ask.
He checks his watch. "In about seven hours"
The glass bounces a ray right into your face, and you have to close your eyes at yet nother reminder of why this is all so wrong.
Sarah.
"We should rest..." he says, plopping on the bed. His plaid t-shirt rises up at the same time the color of your cheeks does, when the glimpse of soft tanned skin reveals itself. He looks up to your stiff standing figure, bulk arms behind his neck as he rests his head on his biceps. "Don't 'cha think?"
Lay with me. Not outloud.
"No" you say, hastily so, not missing the way a flicker of dull akin to the pain of rejection finds its way to his brown eyes. "I..." your voice softens. "I'd rather take a tour of the place, you know? It's not like I'll come every weekend here"
He's about to raise up. I'm coming with you, again not out loud, in case you'd reject his offering again.
Which you do.
"I'm fine" you say, grabbing your purse. "Just... I need a moment"
Away from you.
"Suit yourself" but there's a sharp edge on his apparent kindness.
Closing the door behind you, it takes all of you to not turn around and see his face one last time.
You wander off through the bright lights and noisy hallways, walking until the sun of the outdoors filters a ray over the carpet through the glass doors. Strides take you to the pool area, kids giggling, parents sunbathing and youngsters chilling.
You sigh, dipping your feet in the pool, chlorine up your nose and water baterly grazing your sundress.
But you're drowning.
Drowning on his presence, every room he's in now smaller. Walls of the room collapsing, as the ones of your lungs, every breath tight if your nose catches a whiff of his scent lingering in the air. You'd wash the sheets almost immediately, crying when your head hit the pillow and it smelled like lavender and not Joel.
It was the only right choice: to erase him out of your life, because with every new kiss and thrust, he'd take another part of you with him, and you don't know how much more you can give of yourself without dying. A part of you dies every time he walks out the door, anxious heart pondering when will he walk out for good. When he'll realize the thrill is gone, that your escapades were all but a product of his crisis, and what started as a mutual use of bodies, ends in the waste of your heart.
Joel has become a drug for you: knowing it's destructive, but the high so addictive, you don't mind the crash. It's unevitable, and a small treacherous voice in the back of your head says you're just postponing a foretold death.
Yet Joel Miller makes you feel alive. Alive as a spring, grassbed full of blooming flowers. As sun carressing your skin: if you stay too long, the warm becoming burning.
A kid walks up to your sad lonely pensive corner, splashing water onto you.
"Hey!" but he's gone, and it's Vegas, so his parents are three mojitos down from the open bar, asleep under the sun. You curse, getting up and back to your room to change.
When you get to your room, is eerily quiet. And dark, the curtains closed.
You rumage through your suitcase, pulling out a change. The dress slips off, falling to the carpet with a pathetic drowned sound. You're about to change into the t-shirt when the lights flicker.
"You back?"
You scream, trying to cover yourself.
"Woah!" Joel covers his eyes, both your reactions ironically funny. Your cheeks burn as you finish dressing yourself up, and if he takes a small peak between his fingers, well, you'll never know. "Jesus, doll. If ya' wanted it so bad, could've asked"
Something akin to anger and deception morph into a burning flame in the pit of your stomach. Even after all this months, after this imminent fight, Joel can't bring himself to ask, dancing around the fragile line that barely holds on with the clap of skin against skin and sweat, as to replace the tears that will never see the light of the day.
"Right, because that's all I want"
He raises an eyebrow at your tone. "S' a joke"
"Jokes are supposed to make people laugh"
He shoots you a look, before standing from the bed.
"What's gotten into ya'?"
He walks closer, yet you give him your back, tossing the sundress with too much force in your bag.
"Don't know what you're talking about" as nonchalant as you can muster.
"Look at me" you keep the harsh packing going on. Joel grows impatient at your confusing demeanor, not just from today, but days ago. He's had enough. He spins you around, losing his cool as he shouts. "Damn it, y/n, stop actin' like a brat!"
"Don't touch me!" you yell back, pulling away.
"So that's how's it now?" Joel lets out a scoff. "Y' get on ma' bed but the moment I put a finger in ya', y'act all coy and angry?"
"Right, 'cause I'm a slut. That's what sluts do: we get on lonely men's bed and fuck them"
He grabs the bridge of his nose, breathing heavily. His voice is laced with frustration, and you know it's your fault.
"Never said that"
Why not talk it like adults? No. Too much of a coward to do that.
"Jus' tell me, doll. What's goin' on?"
I think I love you, and I'm fucking scared.
His voice is soft, pleading. In your lifetime, you never thought you'd see Joel Miller beg. You did once, but it wasn't like this. Please, he'd say. Now, here he is, standing before you like the smallest man who ever lived and not the unstoppable force you made him out to be.
It should be easy. But words never come easy. Not to you. Neither love, so foreign it makes you shiver with fear. So natural, one day you opened your eyes to him laying next to you, Sarah staying in another city for a soccer tournament, and decided that was what you wanted. All his mornings. His bed voice, thick from sleep. His droopy eyes and tired smile, facil hair tickling your face as he says Good mornin', Southern drawl never more prominent, kisses in between. Let's get sum coffee after, because he always had to drink the bitter liquid out of his owl mug or wouldn't be able to make it through the day.
You want him to be the first thing you see when you open your eyes.
You want Joel Miller. Want. Want. Want.
"I hate you"
You have ruined me.
He probably expected anything but that, given his crestfallen face. Joel wishes for time to go back, at the beach. He'd say no, push you away. Fought a little harder. Never gotten into your bed.
The worst part is, he's a fucking liar: he'd probably still choose the same, even if the end is near.
"You ain't mean that" not knowing if he's trying to convince you or himself. "Jus' wanna hurt me"
You don't humor him with an answer.
"I shouldn't have come" is what you say instead, the bitter taste of defeat and hurt etched in your voice.
Would've been easier to stop when we should've.
His words run through the tense air like a bullet.
"I agree"
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Weddings had always made you cry.
You weren't even a romantic, but the whole thing-- the promise of forever, it seemed to move your heart a bit.
So, if your eyes shimmer when the bride makes her entrance and the groom, Joel's co-worker, tears up, you feel your chest tight and stomach drop. It clenches with something akin to dread and want, as if suddenly, all that mattered to you was love. A year ago, if you told yourself-- the one who got on her knees to suck Joel's dick at the beach that night, that you'd be here?
You would've laughed.
Falling for the grumpy old man who also happens to be your bestfriend's dad?
Right. Imagine that.
Except there is nothing to imagine. All of it is real.
From his quiet laughter, the sound foreign and not frequent by the way it rasps against his throat. But now the wrinkles around his eyes are more prominent, forbidden laughs marking his blushing face. as he looks away, embarrassed. You can laugh, you had said, I won't tell anyone, yet he made you swore like the sight of Joel Miller laughing was the worst thing in the world. So had become the grey strands on his hair, more sprouting each time, as his damp curls twisted in your fingers.
It is also in the way his sweat that drops over your body as he tries hard to last longer, to his grunts that fill the room as he fills you to the brim with his warm cum. How his rough seems to meet every inch of your soft skin, like pieces of a puzzle.
Something clicks when you're with Joel, and you can't help but feel it's your fault this rift has been created, aggressively peeling the white off your nails as some form of anxious torture. But, he too, aside from his initial Just glad you came, hadn't said a word about it again. Even if he had noticed it all, before Vegas too. Nothing. And then Joel told you it was best if you didn't come. Fucking great.
You feel him tense next to you, body stiff when your arm accidentally brushes his when you stand up from the bench, making you roll your eyes.
The fallout had been awkward. The elevator ride took forever, and then the space on the cab felt too small. He took you to the back, on the benches near the exit, like he didn't want to be seen with you. It got you fuming: why bother to invite you at all?
In all truth, you could've picked up your bags and left after the fight, yet you stayed. You wonder who's more of a coward. In this weird dancing around you've got going on, walking in circles over the words Stay and Leave, like both are too delicate to say out loud. Even as the couple speak their vows, amid the claps and tears, your mind keeps drifting back to one question: Which would hurt less?
It's not until it ricochets on your arm that you realize the tears are also your own. You brush it fast, but by the corner of your eye, you know Joel notices. Still, he doesn't say anything, which contributes to your spite.
The ceremony is over, and just as you can feel the anticipation of the reception's drinks to buzz your nerves down, someone blocks you the exit. A couple, more like it.
Before fully registering their faces, Joel's hand flies to your back, pressed in a firm manner that oozes protectiveness. It makes your heart flutter, no matter how much you try to suffocate the treacherous butterflies in your stomach. You try not to think too much about it as you take them in: a man, looking in his middle forties, probably around the same age as Joel, so as the woman next to him, who smiles warmly. Not like the man, who seems unwelcoming.
"Joel" he pronounces his name, manners coming out cold. "It's nice to see you made it"
His grip on your back becomes more firm.
"Mark" he uses the same tone. "Well, when ya' confirm, y'gotta come"
"And who may this be?" Mark's wife asks, not thinking there's harm in her words. You swear you can hear him snicker next to her.
"She's-"
Joel stops midtrack. How is he supposed to even call you?
"I'm his girlfriend"
You don't know why you did that but you did. You also don't know why it causes you such satisfaction to see their wide eyes and Mark's disdain.
"Oh, I didn't know you had a girlfriend. How lovely!"
His cheeks go pink. "Thanks, Laura"
"Yes, Joel. Didn't think you'd move on" but his tone isn't like his wife's. "I just assumed that being with someone wasn't on your list anymore, you know, at your age. Especially one so... young"
Laura shots him a look.
Maybe it wasn't your place to get angry, not after how you've subjected Joel to your silent treatment this past months. Not after the fight you've just had hours ago. But he is also the same man who held your hand after you thought you were pregnant. He was the one who stayed. It is too how his shoulders slump, like he believes it to be true. You can't bear to see him sad, as contradictory as that may sound.
"Mark, right?"
The man nods, still sickly smiling.
"To me it sounds like you're jealous. Which is awful, because you've got a lovely wife" she looks away embarrassed while Mark fumes. "Also, when I turn around, try not to stare at my ass. I saw you when we arrived"
There's nothing left to say, so you walk past them.
"I think that was funny. Don't you?"
He avoids looking at you.
"I called a cab. Should take us back to the hotel"
No thanks. Nothing.
"Alright" your tone is dry. "Do as you please"
He opens the door for you, but his movements seem stiff and unnatural. Like he's second guessing every breath and step.
The car begins to move. You lean against the window, seeing the hues of neon through the glass. Joel's eyes burn holes on your head, a glimpse of brown in the reflection.
"I liked the wedding"
Joel looks at you properly for the first time since the fight. Your hair falls gracefully in cascades, hinting at an effort that tries to pass as a nonexistent one. Your makeup is soft, but your lips are in a shade he can't quite name, yet manage to make them even more fuller than usual. God, he thinks of it smeared on his clothes and mouth, feeling dumb all of the sudden. Then there's the dress. He doesn't have a favorite color, but as of now, it may be red: specially if its the red that hugs your curves, pushes your tits up and gives a little peak of your leg with its open cut, dangerously close to the start of your inner thigh. Not appropriate to wear at a church, maybe not a wedding either, but fuck didn't he care. He'd even rip it off, if it was such a problem.
"It was beautiful" he agrees, softly. "Never been to one. Maybe's why I think so"
You remove yourself from the window, now holding his gaze.
"What?" your mouth drops in surprise. "What about yours? Weren't you married?"
He smiles, but it appears to be sad. "Never got time for a wedding thought"
Joel has told you things. Things he'd never say outloud to anyone else. So whenever he opens up, letting you in, you let him, feeling that familiar pleasing ache in your chest at the thought of being enough: enough to be trusted with a piece of him. Of Joel Miller's heart.
The rest of the ride is silent, your mind still on Joel's hand on your back, on his words, and how the sting never goes.
In every thought of yours, he is.
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"What'appened to your nails?"
The question catches you off guard. You're surprised he even noticed at all. But your hand lays in the space between his and your dish, stiff, as if waiting for him to hold it.
"Oh" you remove it from the table, placing it in your lap. "I chipped the polish off"
"Why?"
You turn to look at him, brown eyes examining you curiously, as if he didn't know you. Like he hadn't almost whisper those three words you had been tettering around as well.
"Why what Joel?" tone brash.
He scoffs at the change again, shoulders slumping a bit. Probably in annoyance, perhaps in defeat.
"Dunno" he goes back to his dish, cutting the steak with a bit too much force. I thought we were okay again. "S'rry I asked"
Your chest tightens, as it had been doing lately.
Was this the only thing you knew how to do now? Hurting Joel?
"No, I'm sorry"
It's his turn to get back at you. "Sorry for what?"
You swallow the lump that's formed in your throat, avoiding his gaze.
"I-"
Your eyes nervously dart across the room, trying to ignore the churn of your stomach and knot on your throat. You then catch the perfect distraction.
"I think Mark is staring at us again"
"What?" Joel asks in disbelief at your change of topic.
"Mark is staring" you sigh, getting up and dusting your dress off. "Wanna put on a show?"
"I didn't come to a wedding and wore this dress to be seated all night" you extend your hand. A quiet truce settles in between. "Let's dance"
At some point he gets up and takes your hand. It feels good. For a moment, be it childish or foolish, your mind thinks this is how it is: with no one around to know you, you're his and he's yours. It's just the two of you, dancing and laughing under the lights. He'd know the song that's playing, and when you'd ask, unfamiliar, Joel would joke: how could ya' know it, if you ain't even born yet?
For just a moment, it feels like it could be.
The music is soft. It's some sort of rendition of Lady, Lady, Lady by the band Jim hired to play at his wedding.
Joel's clammy hands slip against your cold palms as you walk to the dance floor.
"Nervous?" you ask, biting back a smile.
He squints his eyes at you. "I'm just outta practice, 's all"
You laugh. "I would've never guessed"
He shakes his head, but the ghost of a smirk hides in his lips.
"Cheeky baby. Now you actin' funny?"
Joel's hand finds its place in your waist, holding firmly as the first verses go by.
Dancing behind masks, just sort of pantomime.
But images reveal whatever lonely hearts can hide.
"Maybe I'm just tired" you reply, placing your head against his chest. His heart starts drumming faster, and you hear him gulp.
"It ain't even midnight yet"
You close your eyes, feeling every breath of his chest against your cheek.
"You know that's not what I'm talking about"
Lady, lady, lady, lady
I know it's in your heart to stay
"Y/n-"
Lady, lady, lady, lady
"I'm sorry" this time clearer.
His body rocks yours slowly to the tempo of the music, and for a brief moment, amongst the sea of guests and the voice of the singer, time stops, and it's just him and you.
"Don't"
He can't bear it. Not tonight.
When will I ever hear you say
I love you
Not when your body feels so well against his, your head resting on his chest like all those nights ago, where Joel held you close, the silent promise of never letting you go on his warm strong embrace. Not when just the thought of losing you is too unbearable to even think of. Not when today, he can let his mind drift away and heart beat, dreaming of things that'll make him the butt of the joke. For a moment, you're not wearing this red dress that's making him insane. You're all in white and there's a ring in your hand, just as there's one in his. You'd dance and say I'm yours, forever. A giggle. You can't get rid of me. And he'd smile and reply a Good, wasn't plannin' to.
But now he feels like he's going to lose you forever.
"I missed you" it's your way of trying, again.
His head is a whirlwind of emotions.
"Yeah?"
You lean closer, until his cologne burns in your nostrils.
"Yeah"
Time like silent stares, with no apology
"Joel"
Move towards the stars, and be my only one
This time, he finds it impossible to shut you up. Not when you've raised your head until your eyes meet his, and the constellations he very much loves are ever present in your stare.
Reach into the light, and feel love's gravity
"Yeah?"
You pull in closer, and he can feel the whiff of champagne coming out of your mouth. Your lips are parted, and a shaky whisper is all it takes for his head to spin, drunk in love.
"Please"
That pulls you to my side, where you should always be
Your lips are so inviting. All he has to do is cut the centimeters separating your mouths.
But it's a wall. One filled with doubts, fear and the quiet rage of rejection.
His voice wavers when he starts speaking.
"I think-"
He hasn't even finished his sentence, but your heart is already broken.
No wonder why you've always treated it like a burden: nothing is worst than a heavy heart.
Maybe he'd come to realize just how absurd this all was. Him, much older than you and Sarah's dad. How could he let his daughter's bestfriend go this far. That he was a forty something guy, dancing with a twenty two year old girl. That love comes in all shapes and sizes, but there's no name for this you have going on since last summer. Perhaps, there'll never be.
"Please" you hear yourself repeat.
It started as a plea for a kiss. You don't know what you're begging for anymore.
"No, baby-"
And Joel is the first to step back.
Lady, lady, lady, lady, I know it's in your heart to stay
The cold water of rejection hits you in the face, far from his warm embrace, the contour of his face, centimeters away, now meters.
"We can't"
An ocean away.
"Joel-" your throat tightens, panic bubbling in your chest.
"I think we should stop"
The whole world around you does as soon as those words leave his mouth.
Sorrow is quick to turn into anger, and all those months of guilt, rush, thrill, labored breaths, broken rules and promises you held to your heart as an oath, sweet whispered cons in your pillow that smelled like him. It all comes crashing down with force.
A dry laugh escapes past your lips. Joel winces at the sound.
"A bit too late for that, isn't it?"
"Baby-"
"Don't call me baby" you hiss, feeling your vision blurry. "Don't call me like you meant it"
"I do" the music has reduced to a buzz in the back of your head. His firm voice borders between desperate and pathetic. "Which is why am making 'tis"
"Fucking coward" you spit, feeling your skin on fire.
Don't give up. Please.
Fight for me. Fight for this.
For us.
"Coward?" it's Joel's turn to laugh. His dark chuckle sends shivers through your skin. "Y' shouldn't be talkin' 'bout that"
"Don't put all of this on me" you raise your shaky finger, accusing. "Don't you fucking dare"
"Thought Mark was watchin'. Or 's that 'nother one of y'r lies?" Joel seethes. "Or maybe ya' don't give a shit 'bout it. Jus' like you ain't give a shit 'bout us!"
"You think this is easy?" your voice raises. "You think I wanted this?"
You think I don't care? That I'm doing well? That I wanted to pull away from you? That I knew things would got as bad as they are?
You think I wanted to fall for you?
His eyes darken. "You started this"
Your heart stops beating. People laugh, the band is still playing and chatter bubbles like the champagne flutes waiters carry by.
But all you can hear is the moment your palm meets his face.
"I wish I never met you, Joel Miller"
And then you rush out the door, your heels burning as much as your eyes and chest. Far from the party, far from the world.
Far from him.
"We ain't done yet!"
You hear him bark behind you, yet your legs don't stop, despite the buzz in your ears and the slight stumble in your walk.
Your voice sounds like it doesn't belong to you when you hear yourself speak, without turning around.
"I think we are"
But Joel doesn't give up, making you feel trapped between wanting to hit him again and let yourself be held.
"Y/n!" he calls out just like he used to when you were a kid. Like you knew no better. Reckless. Berating. But now the taste of bitter mingles with his punishing demeanor.
You spin your heel, walking menacingly towards him.
"Don't call me that" you seethe, jabbing a finger to his chest.
"That's your fucken name!" he shouts.
Tears spring in the corner of your eyes. "You know what I mean"
"Enlighten me, doll" the nickname feels like a slap to your face, and for a moment, you wish he called you by your name again, instead of tainting the always sweet calling with his vitriol, as if the four letters meant something sacred he had profaned. "S'a matter of fact, why don't y'enlight me 'bout everythin' that's goin' on. 'Cause guess what? I'ont know what the fuck is happenin'!"
And it terrifies me.
His shout probably ran across the empty hallway. The music coming from inside sounds like a muffled heartbeat, mirroring your own.
To lose you. I might as well have.
"I don't know why you seem'a hate me now" quiet this time, like every word coming from his mouth take his voice little by little. "Why ya' get all sweet on me after weeks of leavin' me, pushin' me to the side... I'm old, doll. I ain't capable of takin' this anymore"
I'm not capable of surviving a broken heart.
The possibility of losing Joel, foever, had never crossed your mind, not even as you closed off, ignoring the way his brown sad eyes would search yours to try and find answers, maybe scraps of the... whatever it was you shared.
Now, it was real, and it shook you to the bone.
"Was fun while it lasted" closing off, trying to shut the doors he let you in, clawing back to that Joel Miller who couldn't be bent. The one Sarah deemed unbreakable. But it's the same that didn't know when to back down, now praying the price of his foolishness.
I don't regret it, but Joel doesn't have it in him to give you more of his heart for you to take. If he cuts it now, from the root, he'll spare his brain from saving more seconds of the image of you he'd have to get rid off: you, taking your coffee with two bags of sugar because you hated uneven numbers, and three seemed too much for your latte. You, standing on his room like you belonged there. You, on his car, the leather having absorbed some of the floral scent you seemed to carry with you. In your clothes, your skin, your hair. He'd have to go to bed knowing he'd never get to feel your strands in his fingers, tickling the remmanents of desolation he'd been carrying like a second skin ever since Sarah's mother walked away.
Your blood runs cold.
"Fun?" the words spill in a bitter incredulous tone, all the while you're trying to hold to him without raising your hand for him to take it, like just the thought of it would be enough to choose you. Words seem to fail you, and grasping at him feels like holding sand: it keeps falling from your fingers, a cruel reminder of your borrowed time. "Joel"
"Fun" he repeats the word, feeling sick. "As in, you'd marry someone who's worth for ya'. Probably choose Texas, maybe you'll stay away. 'Cause you're smart, and know what's good. But if ya' came back, livin' at the same neighbour, in the house across mine, you'd glance up and see my porch, thinkin' 'bout us, and this will become a joke with y'r husband, 'bout your rebel days. To your kids, summ cautionary tale. To you? An'scape of summ sorts of y'r other wise boring life"
Your shaking at this point, not knowing if it's anger, humilliation or sorrow.
I'm sorry. Please, don't give up on me. Stay.
"I'd be an experience. But to me? Doll" Joel chuckles, humorlessly. "You were everythin'"
A choked up sob bubbles from your chest.
"So that's what you think of me?" you laugh, a sound so hollow it makes his skin shiver. "That this is for the thrill? For the fucking anecdote?!"
"Trust me. I've lived long 'nough, kid. You'll understand later"
It's like all those months next to him meant nothing. Like pulling away from your lips was the easiest thing to do.
"Don't you fucking dare call me a kid!" you push him. "I'm not a kid"
"I know you ain't!" he roars back. "But you don't know shit!"
"Neither do you!" your quick to counter. "You think you've got me all figured out, huh? Bet you think that I'm some helpless naive idiot who doesn't know what I want. I don't know what I'm doing, that you're right. But I do know what I signed up for, the price I would pay" losing you or Sarah. Both. "I wanted it, and newsflash: so did you" you breath, running your hands through your hair, trying to comb some sense of normalcy to ground yourself while you try to recover your composture. His arms lay weakly by his sides, restraining himself from running to you and craddle you on his arms. "You chose this. You chose me, Joel Miller" each word pronounced with contempt. "I'm not a victim. Neither are you"
A dry chuckle escapes past his chapped lips. "What are we, then?"
(Two lonely souls who seek warmth. People who fell into the same bed. Shared time they shouldn't have. Selfish. Living on borrowed time. Always tettering around the edge, so easy to fall. History repeating itself. The dancing around. Dirty, like the Texan roads: and they all lead back to his bed)
"So do it" you shove him again, as if by doing so, you could push him away forever. From your mind, from your heart. From your life. "Say it"
He shakes his head, as if you'd insulted him.
"Sweetheart-"
"Say. It" you bark, tasting the venom on your tongue. "Say it!"
"I can't" looking so small, your resolve almost crumbles. Almost.
"Coward" you spit, repeatedly punching him feebly on the chest as tears stream down your cheeks. He tries to grab your hands, to stop you. "Don't touch me! Let me go"
"I can't" this time louder.
Tears sprout with more intensity at the desperate weight on his tone.
A single drop runs down when you say, defeated: "Quit me"
"I can't!" he shouts in your face, voice breaking slightly.
"Why?!"
"'Cause I fucking can't!" Joel breaks. He crumbles in your arms, body shaking as he buries himself in your reluctant embrace. He speaks again, this time softer, "I can't lose 'cha, baby. If that makes me sum goddamn coward, then so be it"
Something in you stirs. Like a lost boat, finding a lighthouse during a storm. Arriving to shore with gentle waves. Home, where it belongs.
"Joel-"
"I'm sorry for bein' selfish" between agitated and terrified, afraid of the silence and what you may say. "For noticin' your quiet and still carryin' on"
"Joel"
"Believe me, doll. I tried to stop. To leave ya'" he swallows, "but then I got invited and my mind went to ya'. Fast. You were the first person in my mind. Always are. I think that's when I knew. S'okay if you don't-"
"Joel!" you shout this time.
He raises his view from his little spot on your chest.
"It isn't just you" in a whisper that could easily pass as the wind that sweeps inside from the main door. Voice so fragile it hurts like glass. "I feel this too"
Just like that, he's both gone and back. His heart beats on his throat, voice raw when he searches for your eyes and asks:
"You do?"
The big unbreakable Joel Miller, looking at you not like a force to be reckoned with, but as a man, worn down by years of solitude and the weight of a secret.
You smile through the tears. "I've been many things, but a liar never"
He chuckles, softly. "Always was a bad one"
"See?" softly teasing, "you can attest to that"
"Twenty one years seem 'nough"
"Soon to be twenty two" pause. "And I would love it if you were there to see it"
A breath hitches somewhere in the middle of the new aphonia that's settled.
"You don't mean all'at. Think 'bout it-"
"I do" you interrupt him, firmly. You hold his gaze while cupping his face, the fright on his face mirroring your own. "You asked before, remember? There's your answer"
Joel is at loss for words. Was never good with them, less when it came to you: like your presence unsettled him in the same way tornadoes made him quiver when he was a child, rattling him to the bone. But there was a morbid fascination to them, in their destructive nature. Like beauty could be horror too, and he had learnt it thanks to your unforgiving winds that had swept him away from his feet.
He was flying. Fucking flying. Never quite landing. Afraid of the fall.
"I'm scared"
Joel leans in, forehead touching yours. His skin is warm, something about it soothing your nerves down.
"Me too"
You bite back a smile. "Big broody Miller, scared?"
"Y' know how'da disarm a man. I'll give ya' that"
You laugh, eyes crinkling while you swat his chest playfully. It's the same sound he missed so dearly. Joel can feel himself breath with relief.
"Now that's the story I'll tell my kids" could be our own. "The one where I won over Joel Miller"
A deep, rich rumble erupts from his chest as he pulls you even closer, this time, your head the one on his chest.
"I'll do you one better" he slowly moves his leg closer to the inner part of your thighs. "Wanna hear how it ends?"
"Jesus, Joel" laugh tense. Your heart pulses like his cock. Hard. "You sure are a mood killer"
He presses further. "But ya' want it, don't 'cha?"
You whimper, weakly. Truth is, you've been wet since you saw him dress on his rather tight suit. Now, after what you just confessed, you're not sure you can hold back any longer.
"Use y'r words, baby"
"Our room" the possesive adjective making his stomach rumble with need. "Now"
Stumbling feet. Whispered breaths oozing with drunk desire. Giggles. Buttons of an elevator pressed forcefully. A crammed space that felt even smaller. More giggles in a hallway full of doors that looked the same. Some mumbling, trying to remember the room. Grabbing the card from his pocket. You somehow make it to your room. Fumbling fingers. One swipe. Two. Try slower, but his voice is as urgent as strained. The door gives in. Finally, couldn't wait any longer. And he's chastising you, for being so impatient. Yet his eyes are all dark and sweet when looking it at you.
"We're here" and then the door closes with a loud thud. And Joel is yours again, just like he was that night, and forever was since.
You wrap your arms around his neck, kissing him back fervently. You open your mouth and let his tongue get inside as you moan his name.
"Please" you whine.
"Please what?" Joel chuckles, enamoured at your hanging mouth and heaving chest. Fucking tease. "Use y'r words, doll"
"Please, Joel" and hearing your name fall out of your lips like it's the most sacred prayer brings him weak to his knees. "I need you"
(I need you, as in I need you here. With me. Now. To never let go and hold my hand, not only when we fuck, but also when we walk, side by side, hands brushing like a touch it's too much to bear. Because if we held hands, I'd never be able to pull back. I need you to look at me as you undress me, because I'm bearing all of me for you, scars, body and secrets, trembling like a scared child, because no one's ever had me. Not like you. Not like you)
"'S right, sweet thing" he drawls out in a husky whisper, like his slick tongue was coated in honey. He pulls your head back, nipping and sucking on your skin. "Say ma' name like 's the only thing you know"
And in a way, it is. Because you'd always call Joel, fingers itching at a number you've memorized until it's burned in your eyelids, like when you close your eyes, you can see him standing in front of you, Texan accent and heavy boots in your doorstep, later to be discarded and hidden beneath your bed.
He pulls back, making you involuntary whine at the loss of his lips and tongue on you.
"Tell me you want this" he's saying, and for a moment, past the fire and the need, you see Joel as not the man who can bring you to come two times in a row, but your bestfriend's dad, who's slept in a bed alone for the past two decades, who can't meet you in the eyes when he undresses himself, looking like the one who's got the more to lose when his lips press aginst yours in a soft manner, not out of tenderness but out of fear.
"I do" without hesitation, as if you would tattoo your promise and wear it like your heart on your sleeve. "I want you, Joel"
You want all of him: from his boring Sundays sprawled on the couch watching a rerun of some old sitcom to his greying hair, aching joints and creaking bones, that despite so, would still kneel and eat your pussy like a man starved, tongue sliding through your folds with a learned ache, pouring the same yearn, longing and hunger that he wears on his eyes when they land on you, no matter if his brown are miles away, because they'd always find your own, like a boat lost in translation and a sea of sorrow coming back home, as if you're the only important thing in the world. His anchor. The lighthouse of his vast ocean of forlorness.
"That's my girl" but no smirk adorns his face, rather a small smile that warms your chest, right as he pulls you back in. There's a shift in the aire as he kisses you know, as if not only his tongue is in your insides but his soul, without holding back this time, like all limits have blurred and melted into a pool of desire and affection.
Joel pushes you down onto the wide bed, climbing on top of you as he kisses your jawline, leaving wet kisses along your warm skin. You moan as every contact of his mouth sends shudders to your body, him taking his time as he works over your jaw, down to your chest.
"Such'a pretty doll. And's mine" his calloused fingers fiddle with your bra, unclasping the lingerie until it falls messily discarded next to the bed. "Got summ nice tits on you, baby" and Joel's eyes sparkle with excitement, lighting up like the neon lights of the Vegas sign, "don't 'cha think?"
Your back arches with his touches, mouth ghosting over your nipple, already pebbled at just Joel's breath.
"Fuck, Joel" you mewl his name, dragged with difficulty as he laps his tongue over your breasts greedily. You can feel Joel's cock pulse and throbb in your thigh as his body hovers over yours, lips still wrapped around your nipple as he suckles and nibbles at the tender flesh.
"'S sorry, doll" he's apologizing in a mocking manner as you whimper at the contact of him against you, suckling hard, tongue swirling and flicking over the sensitive bud as he drew it deeper into the wet heat of his mouth. "Ain't know you'd be so fucken responsive with just a lil' lick at y'r pretty tits"
As your body trembles and quakes, he speaks again.
"Open y'r mouth" you do so, because honestly, you'd never deny him a thing. "Want 'cha to suck on 'tis fingers, like the slut ya're. Get them wet so they feel good against 'tis greedy pussy"
You take the fingers as you'd take his cock, sucking on the skin that tastes like salt and gasoline, a slight bitter taste but you take them as deep as you can, until your lips brush his rough knuckles.
"Good greedy whore" he praises. "Now let me help ya' with that"
Joel gestures your damp panties, taking them off and putting them up his nose, inhaling like he did the first time you ever fucked, back at the beach house that summer that feels a life ago, seawaves crashing onto the shore as they drowned out your moans.
"Sweet" as if your arousal was his favorite dessert, gripping the sticky lingerine until his knuckles turn white. "Fucken wet and drippin', and s'all for me"
He feels your greedy hands fumble with his pants and belt, pulling him closer as the feeling of unfairness at his clothed figure dawns upon you.
"I like how you look in a suit, but right now-"
He laughs, a deep rich sound bubbling up from his chest.
"Ma' baby wants it that bad, huh?" you nod your head feverishly, a beg threatening past your lips.
"Please, Joel. I want to suck your cock" the dirty words come out as quick as a breath. "I missed it so so bad" not caring at all about how desperate you come across or the pitiful begging that's a plea away from drooling out of your mouth with an aching hunger.
"'S that what you want? Draggin' me out'a reception 'cause y'r greedy dirty mouth couldn't keep still? Bet you'd crawl on da' floor just to get a taste of this dick" every word makes you mewl. "Might have to see ya' beggin' for it"
"I'll do it" you beg, voice a wanton plea. "I'll do whatever, I just need to-"
"I see ya' really do"
He removes your hands from his body, chuckling as you pout and whine like a baby.
"Love hearin' ya' so eager fo'me" Joel says, tugging the pants finally down. Through the cloth of his underwear, it's impossible not to see the silhoutte of his hard throbbing dick.
The sight of him, hair disheveled, pupils blown wide, white button shirt now wrinkled and sticky with sweat, tie loose and that faint smell of champagne that clung to his mouth and scent like a second layer of his skin.
"Get on the floor. Now" he commands, and you're quick to obey. "Gonna fuck that dirty mouth of yours until my cum dribbles outta your cheek. S' now? Be obedient if ya' want a taste, slut"
You let out a small whimper as Joel frees his cock from his underwear.
"That's right, baby. Like what ya' see?" his cock is straddling your face in your current kneeling form. "Need that mouth to open wider"
You obey in an instant.
"Good girl"
Joel shoves his cock inside your mouth, giving you a few seconds to adjust before pushing a little further. You bob your head forward but the task proved to be hard when he was thrusting at the same time. His big hard dick hits the back of your throat, a gag dying past your busy lips. 
"'S it bad if I tell ya' I like watchin' you squirm and struggle with my cock? 'S fuckin' hot"
You narrow your eyes, struggling to keep your throat relaxed as he thrusts forward, fucking your mouth and throat. Your thighs clasp together, the slick pooling down your legs in the absence of underwear.
Joel's groans become raspier as his body begins to tense.
"'M gonna fuck y'r throat raw, doll. And then, I'm gonna cum. Down y'r greedy throat. 'S my girl okay with that" he can see the plea in your eyes as you choke on his cock once more. "S'alright then. Ya' know I love to spoil ma' girl"
As his body starts to edge closer, his tongue runs loose.
"Love watching you suck ma' dick" he looks down on you, eyes glossy, probably because he was drunk in alcohol and you. "Love how it feels. Love how you feel. Love- I love you"
(There's an involuntary gag somewhere)
Joel's body tenses and it doesn't take that much for you to feel the warmth of his cum go down your throat.
You choke again and he brings his dick out of your throat and let you swallow the rest. 
There's a beat of silence, as dense as his fluids down your throat. You avoid his gaze, heart drumming on your chest.
"Doll..." he whispers, the last bits of climax sweating off his skin; all that's left is shame. "C'mere"
(Say it back, he should plead. I know your eyes don't lie, but if I heard those three silly words out of your mouth, I could die happy tonight. A bigger man would beg, but he's never been good, even if he tried)
He helps you get up, wobbly legs not being of help when it comes to the shock of his confession.
I love you.
As much as a tender touch as a knife slitting your chest open in a clean cut.
(You're bleeding love)
Love.
Such a foreign word, one you've never felt before. Yet, what's scary is recognizing that latent warmth on every stolen glance; brush of a hand. The tingles provoked by getting the largest serving, even if his daughter sat at the same table. The flutter of your chest when he tried to be there for you when you thought you were pregnant, even if he was as scared as you. In every little thing he had done since you first started playing with fire, how you wore his heartbeat as an echo and his skin like a second layer to your own.
His lips are swollen when they take yours.
"'S fine" some kind of tiredness seeping through the cracks of his gruff exterior and composed rejected posture. "Ya' don't have to-"
"I love you" you croack out.
His voice comes out impossibly small as he whispers. "What...?"
A fireworks show explodes out somewhere in the background.
"I love you" you repeat, words dripping with an adoration only known to captain's going down with their sinking ships.
You're drowning, but the water doesn't burn your lungs anymore.
"Lemme help with that sore throat of yours" he's tugging down your bottom lip, fingers playing with your mouth to open it. He gazes at you with a look that tugs at your heartstrings. "Open, baby"
Your dry throat and warm mouth welcomes the spit he lands inside.
"There ya' go" and you swallow it, making him curse. "Fuck. 'S so hot seein' you do that, my lil' sweet slut"
"Joel" you whine, hands curled up in white fists as you grab him by the collar of his button shirt.
"Whoa, baby. What's goin' on?" he chuckles softly. "Use y'r words"
"Y-You made a mess-" you blabber, the wet slick between your thigh sticky. "I-It hurts, Joel"
"Hurt?" he cocks an eyebrow. "Care to show me where?"
You sit in the bed, parting your legs, finger pointing out the moist zone.
"Here"
His adam's apple bobs, and the gulp reverberates against the walls of the room.
"Fuck... I see" each word strained. "Don't worry, doll. I can help ya' with'at"
It's his turn to kneel, knees burying on the carpet.
He places one of his big hands on your knee, his calloused fingers tracing absent patterns over the skin. His other hand drums slighty against your trembling leg, so close yet so far. You're so impossibly eager, and a part of him, that fragile ego, is boosted to the roof at your (actual and very real) want for him.
All that glistening pussy was his work. Joel really disarmed you like that.
"If I do this, maybe it won't hurt anymore" his mustache and recently trimmed beard tickle against your sensitive folds as he presses a kiss to your core. You writhe, throwing your head back as your hands fly to his hair, gripping the greying loose curls tightly at the contact. "Will ya' let me eat out this pretty pussy, doll?"
"Please" you let out, breathlessly.
"Love hearin' ya' beg" and he dives in, strong hands holding your thighs on place as he sucks your clit lightly. Your hips buck, his face burying into your cunt to the point his nose touches the warm folds. You moan at the feeling, his tongue now circling against your center.
"J-Joel"
"Feels s'good, right? As good as I feel feastin' on this tight little cunt" and his deep voice sends jolts when it echoes against your walls. You squirm at the sensation, stomach tight with his sucking and licking, misntrations sending you to the edge.
"Joel?"
Barely above a whisper, voice tight.
He looks up to you, pupils blown wide. "Yes?"
"C-Can you finger me, please?"
"Fuck, baby" he whistles. "You really know how'da bring a man to his knees"
And you chuckle at his lame attempt of a joke, not laughing at him but with him.
Joel slides one of his thick, calloused fingers through your soaked folds, feeling the velvet softness of your inner walls clench down on the invading digit, a demonstration of how impatient they were to take his cock. He circles your clit with the pad of his thumb, rubbing the sensitive bundle of nerves in tight, slow circles.
"Wanna hear you, y/n" just your name alone on his mouth makes you writhe, and Joel's encouragement as his finger dips lower to tease at your entrance. He slides a second finger into your cunt, pumping in and out of your tight walls in a steady, driving rhythm. You roll against his hand as he curls his fingers. "Fuck yourself on my fingers, baby. Wanna see you ride 'em 'til you come undone. Wanna taste your cum on my tongue as you scream ma' name"
He can feel your body start to tremble, pussy clenching down on his fingers as he fucks you with a relentless pace.
"Shit" he groans, tongue lapping firmly at your clit, "s' fucking tight"
"I-I can't help it" you feel the burning sensation in the corner of your eyes, "I-I feel every inch of you in me"
(Up to your body, head and heart)
"And you ain't even had my cock yet" he's quick to tease. "But I know you'll feel s'good, baby. Takin' my cock like da' good girl y'are"
Tears begin to stream down your face freely, the salty drops hot against your warm skin.
You sniffle, and Joel's movements stop for a bit.
"You cryin'?" but you know damn well he's aroused, by the way he licks his lips absentmindedly as his brown orbs stare back at you, dilatated. You still remember the last time you cried during sex, and how his reaction was practically the same, except this time, it's received with a grateful welcome home. "Fuck, baby- I love when you cry like a lil' cocksleeve over ma' dick"
Despite the lewd words, he's wiping your tears away with his thumb in a soft gentle touch.
"S'okay, baby" he coos, kissing up your throat and onto your chin. Then, you feel a wet sensation on your cheek: but it isn't the tears, yet his tongue, licking the hot stream. "I'll give ya' ma' cock if you want it so much. Now quit your cryin', yeah?"
But you keep sniffling, impossible to close the dam once it's broken.
"My sweet crybaby" Joel mumbles, "I love ya', doll"
"I love you too" each time you said it, a new flower blooming in your heart. It could be. "I do, Joel"
He smiles, the kind of smile that is painful to watch. The kind that says: Is this real? Do I deserve this?
"Y'know I'm bad with words, so lemme show you instead"
He's climbing on top of you as you push yourself into the middle of the bed, lips tangled into a demanding kiss, his tongue dominating your mouth like he wants to tame it. He drops his underwear again, but he's still wearing the goddamn shirt. You whine, and for a second, while over you, he stops.
"What is it, baby?" Joel pants.
"T-take it off" you huff, worked up. You let the tie loose first, starting to unbutton his shirt after. "I want to see you, Joel"
His hand is quick to fly and stop you from taking it off. Even in the dim lit room, you can see the faintest of a blush covering his cheeks.
"Sweetheart..." he mumbles, "I dunno-"
"Please" trying to remove his hand.
"You really wanna?" but behind his teasing smile there's both a hopeful and vulnerable glint to his voice.
You extend your hand, cupping his cheek. He leans into the touch, and for a moment, the world outside ceases to exist, and it's just you, your ragged breaths and the light tickle of his growing beard on your palm.
It could be.
"Because I love you" holding his gaze firmly. "All of you"
"Fuck, baby" Joel starts to get off the shirt, "ya' really made those fuckers downstairs drop their damn mouths when ya' walked in with me. Couldn't believe it, such'a pretty girl could be mine" he snarls, grabbing your face by the chin. "Hell, I'ont believe it either. That you could wanna be with me"
But then you're touching his now naked form before you, fingers slowly tracing through his face to his tense jawline. Then across his broad shoulders to his tummy, feeling the soft swell against your stomach as he leans over your eager form. It's the way you look at him, as if he's the most beautiful man in the world, that makes his breath catch on his throat, staggering.
Your sweet broken voice rings in his head.
It isn't just you. I feel this too.
(Scared. Confused. Happy. Grieving. Loving)
It should be his ego boosted and cock stroked, but when his eyes find yours, it's his heart that feels the fullest.
Fuck, he was too old for this shit.
"Look at 'cha, making lame ol' me a sappy motherfucker" he laughs, the same blush from earlier now more prominent. He leans down to kiss you, his moustache brushing your lips. "If ya' don't stop, I'll take ya' right now and we're gettin' married tonight by summ random Elvis guy"
"What If I wanted that?" you challenge as your mouth presses fluttering kisses to his caging arm, lips stopping on each spot and mole peppered through his thick bicep.
"Then get dressed" you feel him squirm under your insistent lips, "'cause I ain't gettin' married again while naked"
"Where you married, Joel?" you can feel the salt air up your nose of the first night again, asking the same questions. The fact that he's opening to you warms your chest in a pleasant way.
He looks at you absentmindedly, humming as to confirm.
"We were too damn young. Had to, for the baby on the way" he tells. You remember Sarah's aversion to the topic, and given his next words, it makes sense. "Then she left"
I would never leave.
"I'm sorry" you offer instead.
"Don't" the atmosphere is quick to change again as thise words leave his mouth. "Now, where were we?"
You're quick to spread your legs to him, gilstening cunt on full view.
"Good girl" he smirks, lining himself with your warm entrance. "If ya' keep behavin', I might give ya' my cum"
His tip against your clit for a few seconds before pushing down against your hole. Joel groans as his length sinks in your gummy walls, feeling the tightness from before.
"You feel s'good" grunting as he slowly pushes in, letting you adjust to his girth. "Always do" 
He presses a gentle kiss to your sweaty hairline. 
"Tell me how it feels"
"Good" you mewl. "Big"
"Ain't that right" he chuckles.
"Need it all. Please" and you grip his neck tightly, arms around it. His nose brushes against yours as he grunts out a You little minx. "Want it, Joel. I can take it"
He bottoms out. "Then do"
"Fuck" you curse, cunt stretched to adapt to his girth. You breath in painfully, and Joel's eyes lace with concern. "I-It's fine"
"Sure? I can wait"
"I’m okay" you assure him, moved by his care for you. You buck your hips. "You can move"
He starts by setting a slow pace, taking all the space insade your clutching heat. Joel groans at the sensation, your walls gripping him like a vice as he continues to move in a slow motion, pounding into you with deep, powerful strokes. Yet, as his arms cage you by your sides and you look at him with certainty, he picks up a brutal pace, just as you like it, slamming into you over and over again, the obscene sound of skin slapping against skin filling the small bathroom.
"K-keep going" you grip his left arm. Joel lets out a hiss as your nails dig on his skin. "Feels so good"
"Good'nough for you to cum on m'dick?" he groans huskily in your ear, breath ghosting on your skin like a hot kiss. "Gonna fill you up, doll. I'll mark you as mine, now and for da' rest of y'r life"
The way his voice drips with dominance as he commands you, filled with a rough rich baritone tinted with a possesive hunger, his hips moving faster as he drives into you with force, pistoning harder is enough to set you on edge.
He leans forward, capturing your lips in a kiss. 
"Cum f'me, baby. Let me hear ya' cryin' over my cock"
Tears. Stars. Grunts. Moans. Cum.
Your cry for his name against his lips is how you announce your orgasm, washing over you. Your walls flutter as Joel lets you ride slowly through your climax.
"There ya' go, baby. Go on, ride it" then, he pauses. His face strains. "Hold on tight. I'm gonna- I'm gonna cum. Right there, baby. Stay"
Somewhere along the moans and the writhes of your soft skin against his hard planes and soft belly, Joel asks where you want it. Inside, you hear yourself say, eager to feel all of him again, filling your insides, invading every inch of your body until a part of himself leaks into your heart. He's then blabbering as your walls and heart flutter, about kids and other things you both want but can't have. Tonight, though, as he Joel buries himself deep inside you, his cock throbbing and pulsing as he starts to come, grinding against you, making sure you feel every last spurt, every last bit of his release, you allow yourself to believe.
He pumps some shallows thrusts inside of your slick dripping cunt, emptying himself, before pulling out and looking down at you with a tired smile.
"I love you" he says again in fervent whisper, as if by repeating it, he could materialize it. "I love you so fucking much, y/n. And if ya' can't accept that, can't believe in that, then... then I'ont know what the fuck I'm gonna do. 'Cause I can't lose ya', baby. I can't"
"You won't" you don't know why it comes so easy, or why the promise slips as natural as a breath. "I'm here, Joel Miller. You won't lose me"
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credits: divider @kodaswrld / gif @loregifs
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midnite-c6 · 3 months ago
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Can you write Namgyu with a kink for humiliating you? I just know this man is a sadist with the way he’s so mean.
It can be making you cry, making you lick his shoes clean, suck his fingers, spitting in your mouth & making you swallow! All while cruelly insulting you calling you a cunt and a bitch.
He loves to embarrass you! You’re just his personal stress-toy in these stressful games <3
(Love your work btw!!!)🎀
holy fuckfbk nam-gyu will always be my fav , hes such a sadist HES SUCH A SADIST you'll be crying and everything literally making such a mess and he'd be staring at you like this: 🫤 guys i got a good twitter vid for this one (i made reader a bit a bimbo im sry💔)
sadist!nam-gyu x reader <3 warnings: 18+, DARK content, SMUT!!, humiliation kink, knifeplay, humping shoes ❤️‍🩹, twitter link, dubcon, orgasm denial, death threats (1), degradation, voyeurism, pwp
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つ⁠。⁠☆ when you'd meet at the games, he just immediately sees how fuckable you are. you were bickering him about the stupidest things, he was angry, how you almost lost them the six-legged race, of course you'd defend yourself. without any class, he'd spit on you, out of 'anger'. obviously he only wants to test how you'd respond, the games were getting boring, he needs to release some tension. "fucking swallow, bitch. you'll do that, right?" he says, like it's second nature, it was your first time literally getting spat on! it felt so weird! you'd swallow full of shame, looking him in the eye. "fucking-" his dick would twitch from the sight, like he was taking your virginity. "bitch, you tryna' tease me?" it's like he didn't expect you to do as he says. you were actually so submissive it makes him cry. it makes his dick cry, definitely.
he's probably the type of guy to jerk off right in front of you. he invited you to come and eat with him and his other allies, saying how it's much more safer with a team rather than being alone, but once you finished your lunch and everyone's going somewhere else, nam-gyu shamelessly moves his hands past the waistband of his pants, it makes you panic, scared, and clueless, -- you don't know what to do, the good person in you says to help him :( and you do, offering your hand, tilting your head and asking "do .. do you need me?" nam-gyu knew he is never gonna get enough of you. ever. he scoffs, he was about to bust a nut right there, "don't fucking assume, cunt." but you just wanted to help him :( he swears you knew what you were doing. "do you even have a brain?" you'd freeze, and he removes his hand under his pants to pull your hair to face his groin. "i'm sure you know how to suck. so suck." he doesn't give you any time to think before pushing your head to his clothed dick, making your squirms muffled against his hard-on. "mmph- m-mister-" your drool staining his pants, "take my pants off, duh. are you genuinely stupid?"
now you were forced to take on his dick, because of your 'volunteer' spirit. atleast he was a bit nice about it though.. i mean he did take it slow until the tip of his cock was hitting the back of your throat, after that, it's a different story. "you sick little freak. you offer your services to any person with a cock?" is what you'd hear, and the 'glug glug glug' sound of your throat. "no decent woman would offer herself when she sees a man jerking it." you were taking him in so well, and he was conversing like it was a normal day. "you. are. a. fucking. freak." he'd pull you away from his dick, "answer me, you're a whore aren't you?" he tugs, "what are you?" "a whore..." you whimper. he just laughs, shoving right back into your mouth.
everything was too fast D: you'd swear other men were looking. no they definitely were. probably even stroking their own dicks while watching. player 124 was so lucky.
even after that, your throat was sore, making you unable to speak, it wasn't like you were much of a talker in the first place. you'd stay by him though, even if you could hear nam-gyu tell his experience about you to thanos, saying how 'mediocre' you were. that hurts.. :(
つ⁠。⁠☆ outside of the games ->
you were probably someone who absolutely loves the idea of 'making love', he'd just absolutely break that ideology in half. :/ you guys wouldn't have met in the club, he probably met you in a dating app. he made himself such a presentable person, deeming himself as a family man raised by his grandmother who loves owning pets, long walks on the beach, cooking for his girl, all that stuff. of course you'd fall in love. your second date was cooking with him, he finds it cute how clumsy you are with the knife, he chuckles, playfully teasing: "you're such a cute dummy." getting behind you, putting his arms on top of yours as he guides you on how to safely cut vegetables. he's such a sweetie.
but.. when he has that knife pressed right to your throat, thankfully not cutting you, his body caging yours on the counter, your back pressed against his chest. whispering, "you're such a dumb bitch, who the fuck believes shit from people who work at the club?" he did have a point, he said he was a club promoter right off the bat, but your view of him did a full 180⁰ real quick.
pushing your pants down, he presses the handle of the knife right in between your legs, making a soft moan escape your lips, how could he think you don't like this?
the knife goes back to your neck, as his other hand was deeply shoving his fingers against your leaking pussy, "you can't cum, alright? m'not afraid to slash your neck." he threatens, he curls his fingers at the same time, how were you gonna survive.??
now when you're trembling right infront of him, he'd stop all forms of physical touch, getting away from you, you'd fall to the ground, mostly because of your legs shaking, and how the knife infront of your throat blocked you from doing any movements. "please, let me cum, please, i've been good..!" you begged, looking up at him. his eyes darkened even more at the sight, you were so desperate, it was hot. "fine. spread your legs."
(this video) <- twt link ^o^
he presses the insides of your thighs to fully spread them wide open. nudging the tip of his shoes on your clit, the friction was good enough </3.
"you're an embarrassment to women, jeez, you're fucking gonna cum from this." he always seems so mad. you shake your head, you're better than this, you swear. he only chuckles from how you're trying to defend yourself, pressing your thighs together as if to close them, you still wanted that sweet release :( " pfft. stop trying to deny it, i'm not gonna let you cum unless you become a worthless whore for me," fuck it, you were desperate, you'd cum from anything at this point. erasing any self dignity, you spread your legs again. props to you, despite his mean nature, he was gonna cum from the sight.
-
lastly, in a group setting, you know he is the biggest boot-licker when it's with his friends at the club, always wanting to impress them and shit, showing how you're his prized possession! he'll make you hang out with his friends, the purple-haired one included, all doing lines and taking puffs of weed, as he "sweetly" guides you to grind on his thigh. saying how: "nobody's gonna notice, they're too high to notice you being so pathetic." and you whine, tears in your eyes because you feel so embarrassed and vulnerable :<, hearing his other friends laugh, you could only hide your face in the crook of nam-gyu's neck. he'd pull on your hair to get you to look at him eye to eye, "you wanted this didn't you? you're asking for it all the time, why not now?" his words are so condescending, it didn't help how your clit is sweetly nudging against the wrinkles of his pants, sometimes you'd even move a bit higher to feel the bulkiness of his belt. or even the tent in his pants in general, but he'll immediately lift you up, because he doesn't wanna give you the satisfaction that he's aroused too!
he's such a perfect guy, you love him. you do. if you actually do, sucks to suck, he thinks you're fucking pathetic.
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subby nam-gyu soon? (and kim seowan) prolly will do a few asks, too busy for all this stuff i need sleep! also, guys i love the dark asks, keep them goinnnnnnnnn🥲
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differenteagletragedy · 15 days ago
Text
Simon doesn't remember the name of the woman who took his virginity. At this point, all these years later, he's not sure if he ever knew it. It was a chance encounter, quick and a little dirty but fun. Fine.
He'd been in the neighborhood pub, the one he escaped to when he didn't want to be at home, shooting pool. He wasn't that good at it, not then, but he practiced for something to do, and as he racked up the balls for a third round against himself, he apparently caught her eye.
A bit older than him, the woman was immediately forward and flirty, and it wasn't a secret, even as inexperienced as Simon was, as to what she wanted. His body must have felt some kind of desire with the way it reacted to her, blood rushing south as she slid her hands over him in the dim light of the nearly vacant bar, but when she invited him to her flat down the street, it wasn't lust that made him agree.
It was curiosity. He wondered what it would feel like to be wanted, even on a base level like this, and if it would fill up whatever hole that had been inside him for as long as he could remember.
And it did. A little.
He'd never even kissed a girl before, always too closed-off to get in any kind of position to do something like that, but that night, he kissed the woman from the pub, over and over again. He followed her movements, let her put her hands on him and place him where he needed to go, and it was something.
When their clothes came off, left in a haphazard heap around her cluttered living room, it was something more, and when she pushed him to the couch and sunk down onto him, the unfamiliar warmth almost overwhelming, for a second, it was everything.
He came too fast, and it was over too soon. That night, he slid back into his own bed, alone again. He couldn't tell if he felt better, knowing there was something he could do to soothe the ache in him, or if it was worse, having the relief for a moment then going back to nothing.
A few nights later, when the weekend hit and the pub was more crowded, he caught the eye of a pretty girl in the corner, shyly checking him out, and he got his answer.
For Simon, for years, it was better to have a little bit of comfort. Just a little bit, because he never saw a way that he could have more. A stranger from a bar, one from the grocery store that asks him to reach a high shelf and flirts a little too much ... he gets good at spotting whatever that first woman saw in him. The part of someone that's open to a quick, needy fuck.
He sees it in you. Clocks it straightaway, but he also sees something more.
It's in the way you pull back after he kisses you hard and deep, the only way he really knows how to kiss. He stops, thinking you've changed your mind, but you're still there, still close, with such a soft look in your eyes now. You initiate the kiss this time, your hands sliding up to cup his cheeks, keeping him in place as you slow things down.
It's disorienting almost, he tries to shake it off, to get back to how this is supposed to go. He yanks your shirt off, and you let him, but when he moves his hands to roughly palm at your chest, you patiently pull them back down to rest on your waist.
"Slow down," you murmur, smiling up at him. "We've got a little time."
It's muscle memory for him at this point, finding a woman and bringing her to a quiet, private place, pushing into her, feeling the brief reprieve it brings. But with you, the rhythm is all off. It's somehow very good and very bad, all at the same time.
"Thought you wanted something here," he mutters, his meaning clear -- he thought you wanted him.
"I do," you answer. "I just don't want it to be over in five minutes. That ok?"
He's not sure what else to do, so he nods. And he slows down.
It's different, sex when you're not rushing towards the end-goal. His hands, used to action in moments like this, pushing and pulling and gripping, instead find yours. Your fingers intertwine, and you kiss him, almost lazily, like you’ve got all the time in the world. Like he’s worth it.
To Simon, it feels strange and new, but not really -- like it's all happening through the filmy haze of a dream, where somehow he knows every step of this dance and yet nothing at all, all at once. To you, from the soft sounds slipping from your lips, it feels right.
When it's over, and you're both breathless and sated, he feels like that boy again -- the one who'd never been kissed and who didn't know where to put his hands. But now, he notices, one hand is still grasping yours and he squeezes it, just barely.
"That ok?" he asks softly, and he's not sure if he's speaking to you or to himself.
"Perfect," you tell him, turning your head to give him a smile.
He doesn't know if he'll ever see you again. But he's memorizing the weight of your hand in his, the steady sound of your breathing as it returns to normal. And even if he never has this with you again, in the moment he knows that he's capable of it. And that's enough.
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starrrlights · 4 months ago
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Maybe in this universe... p1 p2
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Warnings: fem reader, soft/sweet!reader (for alt!universe and kinda for Arcane universe). Mentions of dying (almost dying), you almost die but ekko saves you last minute. You = alt!you. You = Arcane you. BLOOD and ANGSTY AT THE END.
☆○☆○
When Ekko traveled to the alt!universe, he was in shock by most things; Zaun seemed peaceful, Jinx was still Powder, everyone besides Vi was alive, and the cherry on top was you.
You were, softer, in a way. Like you were the calming wind after a harsh storm or slow ocean waves on a crowded beach. Something that his universe's you didn't give.
His you, well, you were the harsh storm or that crowded beach. After being taken in by Silco with Jinx, it altered your life completely. He made you harder, stronger. A stranger in Ekko's eyes. One that he had fought countless times with, one that he had a fair share of her blood on his hands with.
There was something so wrong bit so right about you, something that gave him comfort after the harsh realities of his own world. He knew he couldnt give in to you, this you. He had to go back home, if he could call that home.
Your touches, words, worries, and the way your eyes would linger with his; made him want to force himself to look anywhere but you, and move forward with Heimerdinger, and make that damn machine or whatever to get back home. Just so he couldn't fall deeper for you more than he already has.
The more you hung out, the more he reflected on you, the one where you were loyal to Silco, would fight until your hands bled, where your anger bottled up too much. He almost felt bad, bad that this could've been you. All sweet and soft. That made him reflect on Jinx/Powder, and Vi, and everyone else that he had lost and gained over the years. The ones no matter how hard he tried to deny, he still cared for.
He pushed himself harder to got back home after that thought. Maybe he could make things a little better back home, just a little. Just enough to know whether or not you still cared for him there like you are here.
The building part of the time machine was a success after a while, and manipulating the hex crystals went great, better than he thought even, with how many hours of work? He could finally go back, to Zaun, to the Firelights, to you.
But he couldn't leave you behind without a goodbye, so he made a (favorite flower) necklace (one basically like the one he gave to powder but different). Hoping that when you figure out that he wasn't supposed to be here, that you'll still cherish the memories you made like he will.
The travel back felt as weird and as uncomfortable as the trip to. Like every atom and speckle of the body was being torn apart and molded back together. He landed back where he first started, the room with the Arcane in it, and he made sure to get out of there as fast as possible.
He traveled down the streets of Zaun as fast as he could, zooming through with his hover board and watching the ground below him, watching for anyone familiar. (He had to ask a few people, no luck there, however)
You were in an alley way, not far from the Last Drop, but couldn't move yourself for the life of you. Every bone and muscle ached and screamed in pain from the punched and stabbings you've received. Even breathing was becoming harder to do now, how long had you been out here anyway? Not like you've been paying attention anyway.
One hand layed on your stomach and the other on the dirty ground, no doubt had some of your blood on it. This wasn't too bad, everything was subsiding with numbness and the thought in the back of your head that said that you've finally found peace in the ruined city made everything almost worth it.
But perhaps you did go too far with the fight how many hours ago, chewed off too much and now you had to deal with the consequences.
Shouting could be heard from all over, but one voice seemed to get louder, almost as if they were getting closer. You weakly looked over and saw a blurry figure of someone run to you, saying your name. They came in front of you and the image became clearer. It was Ekko.
You couldn't be cocky, or mean, or anything else towards him right now, just staring at him almost stupidly as he said some things you couldn't understand.
"...If you've come to finish me off, or whatever... just do it. I'm not gonna fight back..."
Ekko could feel his heart drop at the sight of you, worse than what he would leave you in after a fight. You just... layed there. Practically waiting for death to take you. What happened when he was gone?
"...im not gonna do that tonight. and never after."
You felt his hands moving around you, wrapping something around your midsection where the nasty gash was still bleeding out, making you hiss in pain, and dragged your body up, rushing you somewhere. But that all was long after you passed out.
Maybe in this universe, he'll still be by your side, if you'll allow him.
☆○☆○
👹👹 don't worry I'm gonna make a part two
This probably sucks but is midnight so whatever.
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em-ontv · 7 months ago
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Sing a song for me. (1/2)
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Pairing: Soldier Boy x supe!fem!reader
Warnings: angst, violence/death/murder/gore, manipulation (vought), emotional distress, psychological torture/trauma, imprisonment (vought), mentions of drugs, mentions of illnesses, cursing/language
Anon: I have an idea for a FMC who's a supe but her powers are "sirens song" her powers basically can control someone but in a different way depending on what melody she sings... she works at a hospital and helps people... Vought finds out about her and they take her... The boys hear about her after they get soldier boy out and they use him to help get her by him using his powers...
A/n: Hello, anon! Thank you for this request, this idea is just amazing, I love it! I shortened your request a little so it fits here :). I decided to split this into two parts because I've just been really busy, sorry! Everything written here is credited to you, anon! I'm just here to execute your ideas. Hope you like this <3
Read part 2 here
Word count: 3k
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"Please," the young woman in the hospital bed whispered, her voice weak while her hands trembled over the thin sheet.
She winced at the pain that was slowly eating away at her. You could see it, not just on her face but in the way her body shivered against the inevitable coldness of death.
"Just make it stop... just for a bit." she swallowed thickly, reaching a hand out to you, and you held it for support.
You'd seen this before, so many times, too many times, working at Mercy Hospital. "I'll sing for you," you said, your voice gentle.
As you pulled the chair closer to her bedside, you began to hum, a soft melody that seemed to drift through the air, mixing with the beeping heart monitor.
Her body began to relax, the lines of pain on her face softening as the sound soothed her, a sense of warmness filling her. Her breathing slowed. The tears stopped. For a moment, in this broken world, she was at peace.
That was the way you had always used your powers. For peace. For comfort. The songs you sang were as natural to you as breathing, and their effects.
It was just a gift you had, something you could use to help the people in pain, to soothe those who were suffering—whether it be the children crying in the hospital beds alone at night or the elderly who were hooked onto the machines to live—the ones who had no one left. You sang to take away their pain, to bring peace in places the world forgot about.
The patients who were pale from nausea, you soothed them. The patients who were out-of-control in the ER, you calmed them. The patients whose time was running out, you eased their pain one last time before they passed away. It was all because of your voice.
But you never went beyond what was asked of you. Never used your powers on people who didn't ask you to. Never crossed that line.
You never sought out power. You had never intended to control.
And for a long time, you didn't know you could.
But Vought? They saw the potential in you long before you did.
The day that everything went wrong, you were working a night shift at the hospital. You remember it so vividly—the soft click of shoes in the empty hallways that you had mistaken for visitors.
You had just finished a soft hum to a child who was barely nine years old, singing away the nauseousness that came from his treatments when they came for you. Vought.
It all happened so fast. In a flash, a hand was clasped around your mouth and you were being dragged away. The kid cried for the doctors, cried for them to let go of you. But no, Vought wanted you.
You fought, of course. The Compound V that flowed through your veins not only gave you the power of your voice, but strength. It made you a challenge, but the tranquilizer they shot into your neck was made for supes.
A sharp pain pierced through your body, and you didn't stand a chance.
Your eyes flickered softly, the world dimmed into darkness, the last thing you saw was the nurses and doctors collapsed on the hospital floor.
And when you woke up, you were in a cage.
You were in a cage.
It was glass, or something that looked like it—thick and unbreakable. The cold room they kept you in was lined with monitoring equipments. They put a collar on you, some high-tech piece that clamped around your throat like a vice. It was set to explode if you so much as hummed a note. They made sure of that.
The first time you tried to test its limits by so much as opening your mouth, a sharp, electrical shock shot through your neck, leaving you clawing at your throat in pain.
You didn't know how long it was since you'd been here. Maybe weeks, maybe months. You tried to fight it at first, refusing to use your powers, refusing to sing for them. But it didn't take long before they forced your hand. Vought had ways of making people cooperate, and you were no different.
At first, they made you calm people, to help them sleep. It was awful but it wasn't that bad, you could handle it. People weren't getting hurt. You weren't hurting anyone.
But that was before tonight.
The door to your cell hissed open, and the guards came in and grabbed you, dragging you and shoving you down the hallway. The collar stung as it bit into your neck, but you learned to ignore the pain. It was nothing compared to what was waiting on the other side of that door.
They led you into another room, a see-through glass room that they pushed you into and locked the doors after taking off your collar.
On the other side, strapped to a chair, was a man. His skin was sickly and pale, eyes wide and wild as he struggled against his restraints. His face was covered in bruises, and his breathing was shallow—wheezing, desperate. You could see the tracks on his arms, the broken veins. He was a junkie, barely hanging on to life as it was.
You rubbed a hand over your throat. "What is this?" you asked, your voice coming out hoarse, the collar had been on for so long it was a wonder you could even speak.
"A convicted criminal," a voice said. You turned your head to see the man standing outside the glass cell. You'd seen him before���Dr. Connors. Always calm, always observing you like you were some test subject, it made your skin crawl. "A drug dealer, murderer that we pulled out of one of the city's free clinics. He won't be missed," he said.
"Why... why is he here?"
"We need to know just how far your abilities can go."
You felt your stomach twist. No. They couldn't be asking what you thought they were. You'd done everything they asked—calmed their people, helped them with their fucked-up little experiments—but this? This was different. This was wrong.
"I won't do it," you whispered, shaking your head. "I don't hurt people. I'm not a killer."
"You misunderstood." Connors said. "You don't have a choice."
He saw the way your skin turned paler, and he took a step closer to the glass. "Isn't this what you do? To ease pain? You're gonna help him pass on, won't you?" His voice was gentle, almost soothing, but it made you feel sick.
"His time isn't up." your jaw tensed, your voice lingered with a hint of bitterness. A combination of fear and anger twisting in your gut. "I said I'm not a killer," you spat.
He raised an eyebrow. "You've been killing since the moment you started working for us. You just haven't been paying attention."
Connors gestured toward the other side of the glass, where the man—this junkie, this criminal—was staring at you, his chest heaving, eyes wide with fear. You could hear his coughs, see the sweat that rolled off of his forehead.
He didn't deserve this.
Maybe he was a murderer. Maybe he had hurt people, maybe he deserved to rot in prison, but no one deserved this. Not to be a lab rat for Vought. Not to be killed by a song. His fate shouldn't rest upon your hands.
Your mind raced, your heart hammered in your chest, and for a few moments, everything was silent. Connors was watching, his eyes turning cold, searching your face for any signs of rebellion. He'd kill you if you refused. And if you didn't die, they'd make sure you wished you had.
You were powerful, yes. But you weren't irreplaceable.
You didn't know what to do, staring at the junkie. All you knew was that there was no way out. Not without paying a price.
Connors stepped back, watching you through the glass. "Sing."
You met the junkie's eyes. He was gasping for air now, but he couldn't scream—his throat was too weak, but you could feel how scared he was. He was pleading for his life, even without saying a word.
Tears burned in your eyes as you felt your chest tighten, the melody coming out of your mouth before you could stop it.
The song was shaky, and it wasn't gentle. It wasn't the usual soft tune that you had sung a hundred times to sick patients, back when you worked at the hospital. It was a song of discord.
The melody wrapped itself around the junkie in the chair, and you saw him starting to thrash against his restraints, his eyes bloodshot and wide as he struggled like a feral animal.
Tears rolled down your eyes when you closed them, scared to get another look at him. The melody only grew stronger, and then…
Then... you heard blood splattering and you felt something on your face.
You reached a hand to your face, your fingers gently brushing against your skin.
And when you opened your eyes again, the first thing you saw was the bloodied chunks of human flesh on your fingers.
Then... him.
The chair where the junkie used to sit was now only a pile of blood. The transparent glass cage was covered in red. Red.
You stumbled backward, choking on a sob, your hands shaking, the song dying on your lips. The realization crashed into you, a wave of nausea coming up your throat.
The guards didn't move. Connors didn't even blink. They were used to this. You weren't.
"Excellent work." Connors said gently.
You felt the remaining of your strength give out. You slumped against the glass wall and your body slowly slid to the ground, your legs no longer able to hold you up. Your eyes never left the bloodied chair as tears streamed down your face, your body trembling with shock and disgust, disgust at yourself. You wanted to scream. To run. But there was nowhere to go.
It was the same routine after that.
When Vought needed you, they'd take you out of your cage, remove the collar, and force you to use your powers. When they were done, they'd push you back into your cell and clamp the collar around your throat again.
You didn't know you could control multiple people at once with your voice. You didn't even know you could kill with your voice. Not until they forced you to use it and then you started to see how deadly your songs were.
You were exhausted. Not just physically, but deep down in your bones, in a way that sleep couldn’t fix. Vought used you again and again, like some soulless machine they could turn on and off whenever they wanted. Every time you sang, you lost a little piece of yourself.
Each forced melody drained you until you started to forget who you used to be, the life you used to have, the people that you used to help. Your voice, once you considered a gift, was now seen as a curse to you.
Of course, at first, you fought it. You pushed back again and again, told yourself you’d find a way out. But the more they used you, the harder it got to hold onto that resistance.
You started to go numb, the fight in you slowly dying, your heart shutting down just to survive. Eventually, you stopped hoping for an escape, stopped believing that anyone would come. You were theirs, trapped in a cycle you didn’t have the strength to break.
The worst part? You barely even cared anymore.
So when they took you onto your first mission, you didn't resist, you did everything they asked, you sang to their enemies—their eyes would glaze over, bodies slumping forward, as if someone had cut their strings, or just be blown into bits with a single note. Either way, they just dropped. Dead in a matter of seconds.
It was too easy. Too much power. And Vought loved it.
But they didn't let you forget what you were. A prisoner. A tool.
Until... until they came for you.
Or more specifically... he came for you.
"This place looks like a fortress," Hughie muttered, adjusting the comm in his ear as the team prepared to break into the Vought facility.
"Quit whinin', mate. We've got our secret weapon right here," Butcher said with that shit-eating grin of his, patting Soldier Boy's shoulder.
Soldier Boy barely acknowledged the gesture, impatience in his eyes, as if one more pat would drive him to rip Butcher's hand off.
Hughie glanced at Butcher. "You sure this is gonna work? I mean, if she's as dangerous as Vought says..."
Butcher smirked. "That's exactly why we need her."
They moved in, navigating through tight security and avoiding patrols as they made their way deeper into the facility. The plan was simple: get in, grab you, get out. But nothing ever went according to plan, and the alarms blared before they even reached your cell.
Soldier Boy tore through guards like they were nothing, his shield crashing against skulls and bodies with brutal efficiency. The others followed in his wake, covering him as he cleared the path, leaving a trail of blood and broken bones, disoriented bodies scattered everywhere.
You'd heard and seen it all. The way the guards that were supposed to be at the door of your cage moved with urgency in their steps, the crackle of their radios.
Explosions. Gunfire. Shouts of panic echoing down the halls.
And then... silence.
You weren't sure if this was a rescue or just another nightmare, but something inside you stirred—hope. Hope that you hadn't felt for a long time.
You sat up, your body stiff and aching as you made your way to the transparent wall, pressing your hand against the cool glass of your cell, waiting.
The silence was shattered by the sound of crashing metal, followed by a loud boom.
You jumped, heart pounding, as the door to the hallway outside your cell exploded inward, smoke and debris clouding the air.
Through the haze, you saw him—Soldier Boy, covered in dirt and blood.
The last of the guards who crossed his path were obliterated, bodies flung aside like they were nothing with sickening cracks of bones. The bullets bounced off of Soldier Boy's shield like they were toy pellets. His eyes were filled with aggression, the adrenaline flowing through his body.
But then... he saw you.
In the chaos, his gaze locked onto your cell—onto you. For a moment, time seemed to freeze. You, standing there in your glass prison, looking so defeated, so... broken.
Your clothes were stained, your skin marked with bruises, your eyes hollow and empty with a lingering sense of hope.
And when Ben saw you like that—it made something inside him crack.
He had seen plenty of fucked-up things in his long life. He'd caused a lot of them. But this? This was different. The anger that fueled him this whole time suddenly turned into something else.
He walked slowly toward the glass, but there was something softer in his eyes now. Something he hadn't shown anyone in decades.
The furrow of his eyebrows slowly disappeared. He reached out, pressing a hand to the glass between you. His palm rested flat against it, fingers splayed out like he was trying to touch you through the barrier.
He just stood there, looking at you like he wasn't sure what to do.
You lifted your hand, trembling, and pressed it against the glass where his hand rested. For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt something. Connection. A shared moment between two people who both had been hurt, used, controlled by the same people.
For a second, neither of you moved. You just... stared at each other, your hands separated by that glass wall, but it felt like the most intimate moment you had shared with anyone in years.
Then, without a word, Ben stepped back and raised his fist.
And it was as if you understood him, you stepped back too.
With a hard swing, he slammed his fist into the glass, shattering it with a deafening crash. The pieces rained down around you like shards of ice, but he didn't care.
He reached in, pulling you closer by the hand he rested on your waist, his touch firm but careful, as if he was afraid you might break under his strength.
"Come on," he said, his voice more gentle than he intended it to be. "We're getting you out of here."
You shook your head gently as your fingers reached at the collar, and that was when he noticed the collar around your throat, humming with electricity, ready to punish you the moment you step foot out of this facility.
Ben frowned softly at the device, his fingers wrapped around the tech.
Butcher stepped up closer, glancing at him. "Think you can get that thing off her without blowing her head off?"
He just grunted softly in response, working to disable the explosive.
"Hold still," he muttered.
After a few tense moments, the collar clicked open, falling to the ground with a dull thud.
You inhaled sharply, your first breath of freedom in what felt like forever.
But Ben didn’t move back. He stayed close, eyes never leaving yours. "You can talk now," he said softly, his voice low.
You swallowed hard, your throat aching, but still, you hesitated. "Why… why are you here?"
"We came here to rescue you, love," Butcher replied, stepping into your line of sight. His grin was sharp. "And as much as I would like to keep talking, we should probably get out of here…"
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universefcb · 20 days ago
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Could you do insecure reader with Hector fort. I need some angst in my life 😭 I love your writing sm 🥰🥰🥰
Insecurity at its height
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Pairing: Hector Fort X gf!reader
Summary: You're dating, but dating a celebrity will always be a lot of pressure and you're very insecure about it.
Warning: Mention of Reader, Anguish.
Author's note: It's so sad to see that he's frustrated about not getting time on the field :(
And sorry if there are mistakes, English is not my language.I hope this is what you asked for!
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There she was again—curled up on the edge of the couch, her knees drawn up to her chest and her head resting on the pillow, pretending to be interested in the series on TV. The room smelled of Héctor. It was his sweatshirt she was wearing, his scent still lingering in the fabric, as if he held her close even when he wasn't around.
But he was. Sitting next to her, his bare feet resting on the carpet and his eyes fixed on her, not the screen. Héctor always understood. Every sigh, every look away. Only this time, she was determined to hide it.
The problem was, she wasn't as good at hiding it as she thought she was.
"Is everything okay?" he asked, his voice soft, with that light Catalan accent that always made her stomach turn.
She nodded too quickly.
"Yes, it is. I'm just... sleepy."
Lie.
My head was full. Full of questions I didn't want to ask. Full of insecurities that she hated to admit. Filled with an idiotic fear that grew every time he smiled at someone, every time she saw the comments on Instagram, the messages he received.
You deserve someone better.
She’s not even all that.
You could be with a model, Fort.
She read it. She saw it all. Pretending it didn’t hurt was impossible. It wasn’t about not trusting him—it was about not trusting herself. She didn’t think she was enough. She didn’t think she was pretty enough, interesting enough, perfect enough. He could have anyone. And sooner or later, she was sure: he would see it.
Héctor stepped a little closer. He touched her hand gently, his fingers sliding between hers tenderly, as if he knew exactly what she needed.
"It's not sleep," he said bluntly. "You disappear when you're like this. You stay here, but you're not here. What's going on in that little head of yours?"
She closed her eyes, feeling tears threatening. Could she pretend any longer? Pretend she wasn't afraid of losing him?
"Nothing," he muttered.
He was silent for a few seconds. Then he took her hand and placed it on his chest, where his heart was beating fast.
"Then listen to mine, because yours isn't letting you hear anything properly."
She bit her lip, trying to hold back her tears.
"You don't understand…" he began, his voice cracking. "There are so many people who… who suit you better. Who seem prettier, more everything. I wonder when you'll realize that. When you'll wake up and realize that… I'm not enough."
Héctor's eyes closed for a moment, as if those words hurt him too.
"Do you really think I don't see all this that you feel?" he asked, his tone calm but firm. "I see you comparing yourself. I see it when your smile breaks, even for a second, when someone says something. And it breaks me."
She didn't answer. She just looked at him with an apologetic, embarrassed look. But he didn't let her get away.
"I chose you. Every day. And I keep choosing you. Not because you're perfect, but because you're you. With your doubts, your fears, your quirks. I love you completely," he moved even closer, his eyes on hers, "even when you can't love yourself."
The tear fell, inevitable. He pulled her close, his strong arms wrapping around her small body as if they could protect her from the world.
"And if you ever forget how amazing you are, I'll remind you," he whispered into her hair. "As many times as it takes."
She pressed herself against him, feeling her heart slow, her anxiety take a step back. Maybe she would still feel insecure, maybe she would still have bad days. But in that moment, with his heart beating next to hers, she knew she was safe.
With him, I would always be.
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Taglist: @paucubarsisimp @nngkay @meganesanchez @merinottt @htpssgavi @luvvpedri @moonvr @joaosnovia @httpsdana @ilovebarcaaaa @p4uul0vr @pedricando @barcapix @owala6789
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c4tluver02 · 9 days ago
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full machine
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wc: 1.3k
summary: Steve is finding it hard to make it up to you, seemingly making things worse. What could he do to make it up to you?
warnings: none! angst , hurt , slow burn ;)
a/n: eee i am so glad u guys liked the first fic !!!! I struggled a bit writing this i didn't love any of the versions that i wrote but sigh hopefully u guys enjoy!!
part 1, part 2, part 3
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I'll heal eventually, but faster if you're next to me. ♫
Two weeks have come and gone since Steve had last seen you. Normally you take a week and a half to two weeks to return the film… Not that Steve kept track or anything. But he was waiting for you. He needed to talk to you about your last visit and hopefully explain himself. 
A few days after it all happened Robin was back with Steve at Family Video and he told her everything that had happened. The way you so graciously offered to help him, to the way you left like there was some bomb that Steve didn’t know about. It was just another thing he had to deal with, one more dent in his beat up armor. Which when he really took time to think about it maybe he was saving you. It felt like a waste of a charity case for you to spend all this time to get to know him when there's nothing to stay for. You were worth more than that– you deserve more than having to deal with all the trauma he has or listening to how hard it is putting on a brave face for the kids. 
So a rehearsed speech is what felt safe. A simple way of telling you to run and don't look back but in a way that wouldn't hurt you any further. It was killing two birds with one stone really, you wouldn't be stuck with him and he wouldn't feel devastated when you left. A full proof plan. 
– 
Although Steve would have appreciated a day or two more to think over his plan but here you were the next day. Waiting at the counter in the prettiest sundress Steve thinks he's ever seen. Your hair is curled perfectly and the closer he gets to the counter the more he can smell your perfume– so sweet and warm. 
“Hi, you're back!” It comes out casual but Steve's heart is thumping so loud he worries if you could hear it. 
“Yeah I have a movie to return.” You say sliding it across the counter to him. The barely there smile you gave did nothing to heal him. 
Steve wants to blame the lack of time he had to prepare for how he stands there just looking at you. The day he normally waits for is now here and it isn't going how it's supposed to. Your big smile is nowhere to be found and the laugh that makes his dreaded thoughts go away isn't heard.
“Y’look real pretty.” He's typing the movie into the system, not even looking at you as he says it but you know it's sincere. Everything about Steve is sincere, you've never known him to think too little about someone. 
You’re unable to stop your cheeks flushing at the complement. “Thanks, I’m about to go on a date.” 
Steve thinks he could have gotten whiplash at how fast he just turned his head to look at you. Here you are in his store all dolled up for someone else. He must have done something dreadfully awful in his past life to deserve this. 
“A date huh? With who?” The tape is long forgotten and Steve has his arms holding himself up on the counter in case the answer wipes him out completely. 
“A guy I met at the pool.” You feel like you're in the police station with a bright light on you. The interrogation feeling completely uncalled for after he was the one who turned you down. 
Steves thankful he was holding himself up, the thought of you in a bathing suit and some guy snatching you up was good enough to make him feel sick. He knows how men work. He's a man for crying out loud. He’ll use you for a hook up and you’ll feel even worse and because of Steve's stupid screw up you won't come to him for help. 
“Y’sure that he's not some douche that wants a hookup?” Steve asks, tilting his head to the side. He just wants you to rethink this, maybe stay with him and talk things through. You’ll leave happier and Steve will feel better. 
But if looks could kill he’d be dead on spot. “Thanks for your concern Steve but despite what you may think, guys actually like me and want to go out with me. So if I'm all good I've gotta go.” You grab your bag and head towards the door before he even has time to respond. It's quick and painful like someone shot him, the wound would be felt for weeks. 
And Steve was right. He had gotten no sleep, his nightmares were long and horrific. Nothing was helping him and there was no one he could turn to. The dark bags under his eyes were matching evidence of it. Robin came over one day to try to help but nothing came of it. If he could talk to you now he’d explain everything. That the kids come crying to him 6 out of 7 days of the week, Jonathan and Nancy use him as a dating advice counselor more than a friend, Robin needs reassurance that she's not messing Vickie up with her night terrors. It's all too much and Steve doesn't know where you’d fit into it. Why’d you even want to fit into it? He’s been doing it for years and still doesn't have a hang of it, the notion of you leaving from the first sight of wreckage would be the thing that ends Steve.  
An idea Robin had was to take all the kids to get ice cream to ‘get his mind right’ as she put it. So he made it happen, sure it was 11pm on a Saturday night but if anyone knows that no one sleeps it’s Steve. All the kids were down to come out and enjoy a nice free ice cream night. It was getting hotter and even though the sun was long gone the ice cream still melted fast. 
“You look awful.” Mike says licking his ice cream from the cone. Steve asked for them all to get cups in hopes his car isn't ruined but none of them did so they are finishing it outside. 
“I know. I haven't left my place in days.” Normally Steve wouldn't let the kids even see him like this let alone tell them how depressed he's been. 
“You ever think about just going to her place and saying you're sorry?” Now it’s Dustin asking but the ice cream is leaking through the bottom of the cone getting all over his shoes. 
“Where do you think between all this I just got her address?” Steve asks, rolling his eyes. Maybe children wasn't the best to bring this up to. 
“Well you have her address in your system, you have it for anyone who rents movies.” Max adds. 
“That sounds very stalkerish.” Okay yeah this definitely isn't something he should be talking about with the kids. 
“What you need is a big gesture to show her you care. Going out of your way to her is the type of thing that will at the very least get you a conversation with her.” Dustin says. He’s not wrong. Unless you pretend to not hear the doorbell ring or the knock on the door a conversation would definitely be in order. 
The conversion ends there and Steve drops each kid off at their house. Not wanting them to be out too late, there's still hope to save their sleep schedule. 
He wants to call Rob to see if this is just a case of Steve being around kids too much or if she thinks this could actually work. Either way he knows she won't judge him for it but it's too late to ask now. Just something that will have to be held off for tomorrow when she finally sees him at work. Maybe, hopefully, tonight instead of seeing the Creel house in his dreams, he'll see you.
tag list: @ahead-fullofdreams
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