#slight self harm

[catchingdaydreams]

Beach Day!🏖️

Mithrun x Gardener Reader

Part 1 here to make sense of some stuff

Word count: idk 2000 ish.

Begrudgingly the summers heat over the island became too burdensome to work along your orchids for the past couple of days. It was particularly a good season too for your plum trees but this blistering heat made up unable to harvest at this time. Furthermore, you were more afraid of your friend and helper, Mithrun of passing out from heatstroke....again. And you really didn't want to spend the hot summer afternoon playing hide and seek, looking for him among the many acres that were bestowed onto you.

Staying indoors wasn't very productive either. The times that you don't work, you spend having tea with Mithrun in your green house. He had picked up a bit of a bad habit from trying to slowly regain his desires again. See he became very picky, stubborn even , noting that he only would rest and have tea in the same spot. Before you got well accustomed to him, you immediately chased him out with your broom when you first invited him into your home only for him to call it as quote " a poor shack that even the rats won't nest in". At the moment he still won't even step inside your home, despite your friendship blooming. The last mention of it, he made a puzzlingly looking expression. For a brief second you saw his ears twitch from his hair, catching flushed redness. But that could have been just your imagination.

Nevertheless the green house was out of the question, for it was way too hot to endure as well. As you were thinking of a way you would be spending your time with Mithrun today and an excellent idea popped into your head.

---------------------🍋--------------------

"The beach?" Mithrun mimicked, confused at your sudden suggestion. "Yeah! Why not. It's too hot to do anything today and I thought, what's something I haven't done in a long time and can escape this awful weather by doing it". Mithrun hummed, looking in deep thought. One might think by looking at him that he seemed completely uninterested. But you knew him long enough to at least pick up a few signs. There was curiosity in his eyes for the most part but hesitation pooled in.

" I don't think Cithis would agree with this. I'm not allowed to go near large bodies of water". Mithrun stated. There were many things he still wasn't allowed to do on his own anymore, not since the time he became a lord of the dungeon. Most rules he followed were for his health, both mentally and physically. Pattadol even bestowed you the rights to cut his hair. You thought it was strange at first until she quickly filled in on his situation and his not so past history with sharp objects. The elves method that cutting others hair was a sacred thing among family and close friends, that I should feel honored to do it. In reality you only do it as Mithrun had stopped anyone else from touching his hair , proclaiming that you did a better job at evening it.

In the moment you laughed at his response.

You found his statement kinda ironic too as he didn't care at all what the Canaries thought now, especially when he was wandering off to see you while they had no clue where he was. Your laughter was interrupted as he spoke again.

"I cannot swim either" he stated, this time a bit meekly, almost embarrassed. " Not with the ocean's current." You understood what he meant. His body was still too weak for physical endurance. That's why he uses magic most of the time for travelling to see you.

"that's fine, you should be alright if you just stick to the shallows. And even if you get swept away I can come rescue you!" You reassured Mithrun, grabbing his hand and giving a light squeeze.

"so you be my knight in shining armor then?" Mithrun says his usual monotone voice, but smiles.

"mmm probably not the shining armor part, I think I'll just sink to the ocean floor before reaching you" You joke, acting it out dramatically, pulling Mithrun down with you ever so slightly as you kept holding his hand.

He smile grows.

"Maybe a siren would be more befitting with you, y/n. Considering your dragging me down with you already. How monstrous." You just gently shove him at his response.

You quickly collect yourself and make way into your home, gathering up all the necessary equipment before coming back out. Interlocking your arms with his you say your ready to teleport there. And in a flash your gone.

....

"um Mithrun?"

"mmm?"

"this isn't the beach"

Looking around, Mithrun quickly took in that in fact this was not a beach but at the entrance of a dungeon.

"Oh, yeah I don't think this is the beach"

...

...

.......

"Mithan, the beach this time".

"Okey"

----------------------🍋-------------------

Several teleports later the two of you eventually find yourself along a secluded beach. You stretch as you take in the sea air. Already the coolness of the oceans breeze was doing wonders for you.

You sigh as you plob down your towels in the nearest shade. You pat a spot for Mithrun to sit and he follows instantly. From your supplies you carried along a picnic basket.

"thought we might eat first before we go for a swim. It's not what we usually have, but this is more fitting for this setting" you say as you take out various fruits and cheese you got from the market, alongside some cracker's and bread.

Mithrun ponders over the options before noticing something was missing. "No tea?" His ears dropped as he could not find is favorite lemon tea packed along with everything else.

You snort. "Oh Mithrun, that's something a bit hard for me to make. I know you can make the water boil with your magic and such but I wanted you to try something else. You'll be the first one to taste it too.

That seems to cheer him up a bit. More curious if anything.

Reaching into the basket you pull out a small flask and two shot glasses. Pouring the clear liquid in both you hand it to Mithrun. He inspects before taking a small sip. Instantly he gags at the strong flavor, quickly picking up a few sliced apples to get rid of the taste.

"mmm might be too strong" you ponder, taking the shot in one go like it was nothing to you.

"Wha-what that?"Mithrun rasps.

"oh! It's Pálinka, it's an alcoholic drink made from some of the plums I was able to harvest. Thought you might like it but maybe a cherry base would have been better for you considering you like sour stuff more. Mmm sorry ."

"no, no it's.....nice" He lies, he couldn't even hide the disgusted look on his face.

"welp more for me", you take the shot glass from him and down the hatch it went.

"I can handle alcohol". He says.

"I'm sure you can". You don't fully believe him, certainly not after that reaction.

In the corner of your eye, you see Mithrun quickly tries to grab the flask out of your hands but you are faster. "You don't need to prove yourself, Mith, it's an acquired taste that not many tall man ourselves like." You say placing the beverage back into the basket. He just grumbles in response, nibbling on the crispy apples.

"Besides we came for the beach not to get drunk". You say picking on some fruits before getting up and taking your top off, reviling swimwear undergarments. As you were about to take your pants off you heard a Mithrun breath heavy, as if he was holding on to it before. You didn't bother to glace over as you were too preoccupied folding your clothes.

"what?"

"nothing..." He quickly responds. It was in fact not nothing. He was lucky for you not to see his flushed shocked face as you stripped in front of him. He just managed to control his emotions in time as you turned around to place your clothes in the basket.

You just hummed at his response You didn't want to pressure him further on the matter. Besides you had other things to do Such as swimming.

You raced into the water, giggled at the relief it gave you from the summers heat. It was bliss. You call out to Mithrun stating the waters fine and to hop in with you.

He slowly gets up and trots to the waters edge. You know the whole beach thing was at the spare of the moment so Mithrun didn't have swim shorts with him so his pants would have to do. But as he entered the water you were quite puzzled as to why he didn't remove his long sleeved shirt.

"you're not taking your shirt off? It would be heavy to swim in it". The odds of him actually having trouble swimming would become higher if he kept it on. You went too fond of actually trying to save a drowning elf anytime soon.

Mithrun stopped, looking at you before quickly avoiding your gaze. A flash of emotion took his eyes. Pain, disgust and shame washed over.

"Im- you won't like it" he says, barely able to hear it.

"like what?" You say confused.

....

It took a few seconds before he spoke. As if unable to properly find the right words for what he was going to say next.

"My body. Isn't it right" it's a crit and vile tone as he spoke about himself.

You were still confused but concerned about how Mithrun was reacting. He took a glance at you and signed. He knew he didn't have to show it to you but he felt like he had no choice. Just let you see him and then you wouldn't bring it up again. You would be too disgusted anyway. He got over it and pulled his top partial up.

"Mith...."

You didn't know what to expect. His stomach was adorned with warped skin that twists and pulls looking like it never truly healed properly. His lanky and frail form was littered in scar, some thick and asymmetrical, some thin, some repeated over and over in the same spot. It made your heart drop. Not how it looked but how awful Mithrun must feel.

Your lack of silence stung even more for Mithrun. He wanted to leave right then and there but was too frozen. He didn't even hear your voice call out to him. He was in a haze, about to shut down until you cupped his cheek, making him properly look at you. His glassy eye bore in shock as he looked directly in yours, searching for disgusted in any way shape or form. But there was none.

"You can keep your top on if you want to , if that's what makes you feel comfortable. But I just want to let you know I'm not disgusted nor I would look down on you for it. Never ever. You're still my friend Mithrun and Im here for you. All your scars, it shows you are a survivor, so strong and determined to continue on despite dealing the bad hand.... Oh I'm not good with these types of things when it comes to words but I hope that helps-ah!"

Mithrun pulls you into a tightly hug. He nests his face in on your shoulder, a feeling of dampness is on your skin. Your hands reach out to rub his back, soothing him as his cries in front of you for the first time. You let him continue letting it out, until cries become sniffles.

"...Thank you" he says meekly, still holding onto you with the same force, as if scared that you would disappear if he let's go.

"Do you still want to swim with me ?"

He just nods into your shoulder.

You're the one that breaks the hug but your hands move to his own and intertwine them as you guide him into the deeper water.

"wait". He says and you pause. He let go of your hand for a quick sec, to take off his top completely, chucking onto the sand. You smile as he grabs it again giving it a squeeze to confirm to continue.

The two of you spend most of your time in the water, cooling off and not drowning. As pleasant as it was you wanted to do other beach style activities with Mithrun. He in fact cannot build a sand castle. He was being too much of a perfectionist and would redo his castle again and again. It didn't help that the tide was coming in a swept away at one less imperfect castle he made. Shortly after you decided to look for seashells before arriving back on your towels and finishing whatever food was left.

Both of you lay down on the towel, taking in the warmth. Neither of you said a word to each other but there was no need to. Everything felt content. It was a pleasant day, you felt, spending it with your friend made you all the more content. And as you both further basked, the greater ease of sleep fell onto both of you till eventually you're snoozing together on this summer afternoon. Truly peaceful as if nothing could go wrong.....

You both got sunburnt.

----------------------🍋-----------------

Phfft

"Oh my God, you look like a tomato!!" Fleki cackles as she slams her hands on the table, unable to control her fits of laughter as all the Canaries witness a very sunburnt Mithrun. She tired poking at his red skin but Pattadol swatted their hand away.

"Mmmm? He's not completely red though look there I think there are hand prints on his hips. Oh Mithrun you're not leaving much to the imagination are you. Quite Naughty~" Lycion giggled.

Mithrun shot him a glare.

"Well I think he's learnt his lesson. Next time please apply sunscreen." Pattadol stated as she applied aloa over his burnt back.

"I'm surprised he even took his shirt off, wasn't you with y/n? Usually you kick such a fuss about exposing your body even hiding your injuries from us. This is an odd change indeed" Otta says puzzled.

In the mist of all the chatting Mithrun turns his gaze to the only elf in the room who hasn't made some jab or snark comment about his appearance. Cithis smiles warmly at Mithrun, a sort of fondness like a mother has for a child. Deep down she knows something about Mithrun that he doesn't quite know himself yet.

"Did you have a fun day at the Beach, Mithrun?" She asks softly.

The group stops talking, all eyes are on him.

Mithrun ponders in deep thought. Recalling the events that took place today. The elves were shocked to see a cheshire cat like smile was plastered on his face as he gazed fondly into nothingness.

"Yeah, I think-no.... I know I did".

[Thanks for reading!]

This fic was just made up on the spot and was originally supposed to be a funny crack fic about Mithrun getting in all sorts of trouble at the beach in a comedic way. But as I kept writing I was like damn it's definitely not a crack fic. Anyway I am really happy with how this turned out.

[r0tt1ngb0y]

me when no slice slit slit slice raaaah fruit ninja

edit: shit myself when i saw operationandre liked the post

[saturncoyote]

To have rot is... not a pleasant sensation, it's cold and repugnant, a disgusting feeling that spreads all over your limbs, it's revolting.

The growing desire to rip the growths with your own claws like a coyote chews off it's own leg, the only thing that stops you is the knowledge that doing so would be a useless attempt; is the blood even yours at this point ?

Knowing that the itching will never go away, your teeth come closer to your skin every so often, but at least you're not cold anymore.

[a-confused-wizard]

"Be good to your wives, give them what they need. And the kingdom of heaven will be at hand" - Good old Revs Putty

[team-iceflower]

*Ruby cutting vegetables*

Ruby: I've been training for this moment my whole life! Yknow, cause I cut myself.

Weiss: *jaw on the floor*

Ruby: Oops, did I say that out loud?

[hualiansupremecy]

got sent to the nurse for punching walls 😐😒🙄

i hate her sm I wtkms ong 😭💀😋😔

[pawzunyan]

give him attention he needs it to survive (that blonde oc.)

(4th panel sh warning just incase)

[ashpkat]

this originally wasn’t even call. js ended up looking like him so ig it’s him now

[musicmutt]

twisted inside of me like gnarled thorns

ripping at my throat with my own hands

[lawsofchaos1]

Seven Sentence Sunday: No Greater Love (the coda fic)

Tagged by @echo-bleu (I still totally missed Sunday oops)

This is from one of my current, unpublished WIPs, a coda fic for Greater Love Hath No Man (https://archiveofourown.org/works/32754592)

Alec's parabatai is next to him, the two of them barely fitting in the booth side by side with Max still clutched in Alec’s arms, but the thought of relinquishing his grip makes Alec’s heart pound in his chest, cold sweat threatening to break out even as his wrist pulses in agonizing memory. 

His son was dead and has been returned to him and Alec can’t process this, can’t believe it, not yet - not after the days and weeks and months that he’s lived knowing that he’d never see his son again. Not after the months of knowing that the closest he’d ever get to the child he raised and loved was in the reports that crossed his desk from the Downworld.

It’s all Alec can do to keep breathing, to keep air going in and out of his lungs as he feels the steady thump of Max’s heart against his chest. Jace must be able to feel the way time is going liquid in Alec’s mind, streaking bright smears across his sight, because he’s effortlessly controlling the conversation in the way he only does on the rare occasions Alec needs a shield.

Jace’s focus doesn’t waver from Magnus and Catarina across from them, but a single hand slips under the table and lands heavily on Alec’s thigh, fingers gripping tightly enough to ground Alec even without the sharp brightness of broken skin that Alec guiltily prefers.

Slowly, sounds begin to sink down from the distant buzz, coalescing into distinguishable words just in time for Max to twist in Alec’s lap.

Tagging: @dr-lemurr (fanart snippet?), @to-the-stars-writing @alexanderlightweight @arialerendeair @clinical-chaos

[thesister]

[ "I wonder if you bleed ink instead of blood" ]

[ She stares blankly at her hands, clenching and unclenching them. They feel so...distant. She hates it.

Her eyes flick to the empty syringe and vial on the desk in front of her. Something gets caught in her throat.

She blinks and there's blood, "Or red ink", in the vial; as well as a dirty syringe and a small stream of blood dripping down her left arm. She watches with a morbid fascination as it pools in the crevices of her palm.

Her attention is drawn back to the vial and, picking it up carefully with her right hand, and swirling it. It doesn't look right. Not how it's supposed to. The sight makes a small frown tug at her lips.

She turns to the dip pen on her desk, dipping it into the vial and watching as some of the liquid drips off of the metal tip. It's viscosity soothes her.

She puts the tip of the pen to paper and scrawls lazily, a small relieved smile tugs at her lips at the odd breaks in the smooth writing. Blood. ]

[wangxianficrecs]

the field meets the wood by astronicht

the field meets the wood

by astronicht

T, 7k, wangxian

Summary: Wei Wuxian is a dark shadow in the barley. Wei Wuxian is sorry for the kind of compassion that he is about to hand out. (in which Lan Wangji is stolen for salt, and Wei Wuxian unravels the world, a little)

Mojo's comments: Whoa. lwj is kidnapped after being struck with a wasting curse, and wwx goes yiling laozu on the salt merchants who took and hurt him. He's hurt and dripping blood the whole time, yet still manages to have a philosophical discussion about the universe and meaning of nothing before laying down a metaphysical retribution that nearly kills him. It's delicious. The writing is simply beautiful, which is a funny thing to say about a story that evokes such visceral horror.

Excerpt: “Correctly done, your ritual probably would not kill a cultivator,” Wei Wuxian allows. His voice is very cold, very academic. He sounds like Wen Qing, as well he should. He cut his teeth in the finer depths of demonic cultivation first at his shijie’s kitchen table after the war, then at Wen Qing’s elbow. He feels like a creation of the dead women he has known — Madam Yu, shijie, Wen Qing, all of their aborted scorn, their recalled injuries, the way even shijie’s eyes could sometimes look like two dry river stones. Lan Wangji, there on the floor, once had a mother who was kept locked away. Perhaps her qi was bound with a curse like this one; perhaps Lan Wangji has been used before now as a different sort of hostage. Wei Wuxian will try to do right by her. Wei Wuxian would have wanted her as a mother-in-law even if she were as formidable as Madam Yu.

bamf wei wuxian, slight whump, ritualistic self-harm, canon era, tang dynasty style, blood loss, blood and injury, salt economics, post-canon, podfic available, horror, pov wei wuxian, kidnapped lan wangji, established relationship, yiling laozu wei wuxian, curses, happy ending

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[onetruewolfgang]

My costume for a fall festival tonight! I’m a wolf (obviously)

Plus a little bit of a face reveal??? For this account anyways

[autogeneity]

realized that although I have arguably been through some rougher or at least comparably rough times in recent years (vs childhood), I have felt no inclination towards self-harm in a very long time and don't expect to. like, if I think about feeling some of those ways now, I might take a walk or perhaps a run or go insane at a punching bag (...one may argue this is also a form of self harm but it's different I think). or idk just go somewhere do something. I had no such options as a kid! it was very literally trapped animal behaviour

[random4fun]

I finished this piece.

"The Horror of Having a Body"