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whovianwatchingstartrek · 1 year ago

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A Whovian Watches Star Trek for the First Time: Part 104 - Battle of Pahvo

Star Trek: Discovery - Season 1 Episode 9 - Into the Forest I Go

We pick up exactly where we we left off. Command is recalling Discovery back to Federation controlled Space, and abandon the Pavhan's defence. Lorca however, disagrees, and has a clever plan to take down the Ship of the Dead. Trouble is, we only have 3 hours to figure out how to defeat the cloaking device, because that is the time that Command expects Discovery to Warp to safety by.

To create a paper trail about why Discovery is travelling by warp and not by spore drive, however, Lorca orders Paul to have every medical test done, which will inevitably reveal to his Doctor BF about the genetic nature of his connection to the spore drive.

The actual plan is simple, however it requires Discovery to make hundreds of consecutive spore jumps to 3d image the ship but would almost certainly fry Paul's brain. We're then given the idea that the Mycelium network can extend beyond just the galaxy into the rest of the universe and even into parallel realities, and this really motives the scientist inside Paul, seems to be hinting that this the direction we're going in once this war arc is done and dusted.

In recent years has kinda become saturated with multiverses, but it's an idea that I love. If we do end up going in that direction, I hope it's handled well. Doctor Who has kinda dabbled in parallel universes before, Most Notibly Inferno and the overarching story of Series 2 of the Revived Series, and has kinda set my taste for how I like Parralel World storylines. Point is, if we do go in that direction, I hope Star Trek handles it's multiverse more akin to how Doctor Who does, and less like how Comic Book movies handle their multiverses. Basically, I want it to use a multiverse to tell interesting stories with the characters we have, I don't want it to become cameo-city

Paul get's into position to make the jumps, the Ship of the dead uncloaks. Ash and Michael beam aboard and the battle begins.

While aboard, Michael finds Admiral Cornwell and Ash starts having PTSD flashbacks after encountering the Klingon Torturer. Since The Admiral is unable to walk, and the Ash is out of commission, Michael is alone in placing he sensors. Luckily she successfully does it, and Discovery does it's jumps. As predicted, the Ship of the Dead goes back into cloak, but Discovery completed it's scans and now can bypass the cloaking!

The scenes with the doctor watching Paul suffering to make all those jumps was heartbreaking, and the episode had be at least convinced that Paul would die in the process. I also loved Michael's confrontation with Commander Kol, over his lack of honour, and her reclaiming Captain Georgiou's rank badge, which allowed her to kind of redeem herself in her own head.

With Kol defeated, and the Klingon Ship of the Dead destroyed, and command decides to decorate Lorca with something, presumably a medal, called the Legion of Honour, however Lorca decides to pass that honour onto Paul, which I'm really happy to see. This man deserves everything for going through that drive. However, Paul decides that the jump home will be the last jump and he'll reture to earth afterwards, which makes me wonder who'll take that spot going forward.

We get an interesting scene where Ash opens up about what happened while he was in klingon prison, and his survivors guilt and how that affected him. My heart goes out for the guy. But we also get the revelation that the Torturer made him some kind of sleeper agent or something, and that programming is starting to awake.

We're then left with the Cliffhanger of something going very wrong during that jump. The Bridge is in chaos, and no one knows where they are.

This was a very nice conclusion to the whole Klingon War arc, and I'm excited to see where we're going next. Whatever is happening with Paul, and Ash, as well as where the ship ended up jumping to. I'm a bit worried about the multiverse direction the first half of the episode hinted at, but we'll see where this goes

#whovian watching star trek #star trek #star trek Discovery #Star Trek DIS #Star Trek DISCO #ST DIS #ST DISCO #DIS #st: disco #DISCO #st: discovery #Discovery #ST: DIS

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jellydishes · 2 years ago

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fae and vampire unlocking sleeper agents like 👀👀👀 for "wip: fae gerry and vampire michael"

this is a magnus archives au i keep returning back to from time to time. it's a lot of fun, because most people would assume metalhead gerry to be the vampire instead of michael :>

here's an excerpt:

Gerry stretched his lips in something approximating a smile. "Sorry," he said without a trace of anything but amusement in his voice, "but unless you're packing cold iron fillings in there, you aren't likely to accomplish anything except giving me very fond memories to look back on tonight."

The young man who obviously wasn't on closer inspection -the skin was too thin and stretched, the eyes too old- had the good grace to look astonished. He released his hold on Gerry's throat and staggered back a few steps, eyes wide. Gerry watched him with interest. He hadn't actually heard of a vampire feeding off of a fae before, and he was curious about what effects it would-

Oh, there it was.

Gerry couldn't help a snort as the vampire lifted a hand that looked more spindly and with far more joints than it had a few minutes ago, and cradled their head. "What did you…?"

"Me? I didn't do anything, I was minding my own business. If you'll recall, you were the one who latched onto my throat without so much as a smile or a 'what's a metalhead like you doing in a place like this?'" The vampire was wavering on their feet now, and Gerry watched as they wheezed into their hand. "Having a little trouble over there? It might have something to do with trying to drink the blood of an unseelie. Whoops."

The vampire muttered something, then said louder when Gerry opened his mouth again, "I don't know what you're talking about, I don't…"

#The Magnus Archives #tag game #gerrymichael

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harrelltut · 1 year ago

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#harrelltut #u.s. michael harrell #quantumharrelltut #kemet #king tut #O MICHAEL #om #MOON EMPLOYMENT #department of defense #the pentagon #the octagon #sleeper agent michael #SAM.gov #michael's underground mu:13 military illuminati

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roxyteal · 7 months ago

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Baldi’s Basics Fangame Tourney - THE END

Looks like we have our winner! And it's...

Well uh. This is a funny ending.

Tourney bracket chart.

Full rankings. All characters are sorted based on the % they earned during their last round in the tourney. If more than one share the same number, they then share the placements.

Baldi 📏 (round final: 52.6%)

Alex 🌷 (round final: 34.2%)

Viktor 🎭 (round final: 13.2%)

Text 🔌 (round 3: 44.4%)

Billy �� & Dave ♿ (round 3: 28.6%)

Imnever 🪽 (round 2: 45%)

Gonzalo ⚓ (round 2: 40.5%)

Clown 🤡 (round 2: 38.5%)

Lady Blossom 🌸 (round 2: 28.9%)

Joe 🍺 (round 2: 27%)

Wildy 🆗 (round 1: 41.2%)

Alien King 👾 (round 1: 40%)

Michael ✏️ (round 1: 36.4%)

Matchabun 🐇 & Taffy 🎤 (round 1: 27.3%)

Carl 🌮 & Juan 👓 (round 1: 25%)

Baldina 📓 & Mikkie 🦿 (round 1: 18.2%)

Frances 🗡️ (round 1: 9.1%)

Denied 🦈 (round 1: 8.3%)

Thank you to everyone who participated, voted, shared, rooted for certain characters, and so on! This was a labor of love and it was fun to do!

Thoughts are in the Read More!

Real talk, I included Baldi 📏 for fun, to see how he'd hold up to the others. Guess no one can attest to the original, though I think the recent Basically, Games! 404/NULL arg may've had something to do with it.

Also, I honestly thought the Dave ♿ fandom would've fully arisen in round 3, like the Steam release of DFACR was a sleeper agent. Guess I was wrong!

And if y'all have been seeing the 🦈 DENIED PROPAGANDA 🦈 I've been posting as of late, you know my feelings on his less than stellar loss in the first round. (One vote, at the last minute...)

So, ideas. I was thinking of maybe holding another tourney just like this one, but only featuring the ones who lost the first round, and see how that goes. Same rules and everything. Let them have a shot!! (It means 11 contestants, so maybe I could try to add one more? Or have one matchup be a triple threat? ScoreCount only lets me do one that's 2, 4, 8, 16, or 32 entrants total.)

And, maybe someday I could do something like this all over again, but exclude Baldi 📏 because I now understand that he is far too powerful.

#baldis basics #bbau #bbau fighting tourney #roundfinal #finalresults

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total-drama-takes-takes-2 · 1 year ago

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tti episode 16

“Last time, on Total Takes Island: The contestants competed in a treasure-themed scavenger hunt- in the middle of a blizzard! Ass kept up their winning streak by accidentally tricking Kelly, turning most of the remaining campers against them when they tried to win Max over by kissing him. Michael was totally not jealous, but formed a brief alliance with the other girls and such to vote for Kelly, including a reluctant Julia. Patrick won immunity, despite his… um, shortcomings. Will anyone be safe from Chef’s wrath today? Will Courtney and Bonnie finally team up to kill Ass? Find out now on Total! Takes! Island!”

McLovin listens intently as Staci talks to themselves, pacing around the picnic table the two are situated at. Every few minutes, she takes a seat and tries to regain her composure when she gets too dizzy.

McLovin’s attention is divided between Staci and the bird’s nest sitting on the intercom speakers a few feet away. Half of the paper he’s scribbling on is devoted to a Kelly portrait for Staci, and the other half is a sketch of the birds.

“So, if I go for Ass next, I’ll like, be totally eliminated. They’ll catch on! But who can I get that’ll weaken Ass’ advantage?’ Staci asks, scratching their chin as they walk in circles around the table.

“Um… you should start an alliance with Courtney,” McLovin offers, using a blue crayon to color in the belly of the songbird drawing. “They hate Ass.”

“I already tried, they said they're really sorry but they’re doing things on their own now,” she sighs. “Bonnie said the same thing, but told me if I got enough support against Ass they’d vote with me. But it’s not enough!”

“What about… Patrick? He could be a good ally,”

Staci sighs. “I’m not really looking for allies so much as I am hoping Ass doesn’t win immunity today,”

“That could be pretty easy. But you should find out who’s on Ass’ side first,” he says merrily, using an orange crayon to fill in Kelly’s hair (he lost the yellow).

They pause and think for a moment. “You know, that’s not such a bad idea,”

“Campers!” Chris’ voice blares over the intercoms, frightening the birds away from the nest just as McLovin was about to finish the drawing. “Get your sorry butts in gear and grab some breakfast before today’s challenge. You have twenty minutes!”

---

Julia watches as Chef fills her tray with a mysterious bean-like brown slop and sends her on her way. She surveys the remaining tables- Courtney and Bonnie are sitting at opposite ends of the former Fujoshis, Staci and McLovin chatting idly between them. Michael is sitting in her usual seat, Scary under the table, Ass on the opposite side of Michael. Max is sitting by the garbage bin on the floor in the corner of the room, likely still embarrassed from yesterday.

Julia takes a seat next to Ass, diagonal from Michael. “Good morning, girlies!”

Michael rolls her eyes, standing and leaving as soon as Julia sits down (much to her annoyance). Ass clicks their tongue. “Trouble in paradise much?”

“She’s just mad about the Scruffy thing. Total hypocrisy,” Julia says, glaring as Michael scrapes off her plate into the garbage. “Like she wasn’t all over Max.”

“Whatever. Doesn’t really matter now that you have me. Let’s talk strategy for today,” Ass smiles. “Now, I’m not sure what the challenge is gonna be, but I say we go for Staci next. I don’t like the way they’ve been looking lately- total sleeper agent.”

“I have no idea what that means,”

---

JULIA: “Is it weird that I miss Scruffy’s input on everything? I mean, yes, we had the upper hand because they knew all the challenges, but Ass really isn’t that funny or clever and it’s starting to get hard to follow.”

---

Max watches Michael curiously, but doesn’t bother to mention the odd display at the table he just witnessed.

“Hey, Michela,” he says, causing Michael to jump a little.

“Jesus, where did you come from?!”

Max stares, slightly annoyed. “I’ve been here the entire time. I wanted to ask you something,”

“Um… is it going to be degrading to answer?”

“Likely. Courtney and Bonnie said you were… pretty mad about yesterday. Kelly,”

Michael goes quiet for a moment. “I was just like, disgusted. Um, you know? Don’t believe everything you hear on this island!”

Before Max can answer, Patrick comes through, shoving Michael backwards. She falls onto her butt and glares at him. “That guy really likes pushing. Jerk,”

She stands and walks away just as Chris’ voice returns, though this time through a megaphone outside.

“Alright, campers! Your next challenge starts in five, and you’re gonna wanna be ready for it- so get your asses out here, pronto!”

Ass rolls their eyes, standing and grabbing Julia’s wrist to drag her out of the mess hall alongside them. Both Courtney and Bonnie watch the interaction nervously.

---

BONNIE: “Ass by themselves is bad enough- it’s still a mystery to me how Courtney and I are still here. But Ass and Julia? Yeah, bad news,”

---

“Today’s challenge is a classic game of hide-and-seek. I’m giving you each ten minutes to hide before Chef Hatchet hunts- I mean, finds you,” Chris chuckles. The campers look at each other nervously. “The lifeguard chair is the home base. When he finds you, you can run out here for sanctuary. Be warned, he’s armed.”

Chef walks out, holding a water gun.

“Is that supposed to be scary?” Ass scoffs.

Chef cocks the gun and aims it at them, pulling the trigger just in time for them to duck as it hits Patrick behind them, sending him through the wall of the mess hall. Everyone stares in terror as Patrick walks back outside, dazed with his teeth grit. “This is a Valentino suit!”

Chef rolls his eyes.

“You got bigger things to worry about, dude,” Bonnie says, crossing their arms over their chest as he stands next to them. He rolls his eyes.

“You have three ways of winning this: Don’t get found- unlikely- run to home base before getting shot- basically impossible- or tag another player after you’ve been caught. Your ten minutes start now!”

Each camper looks at each other and runs while Chef stands with his back to the island and counts. Courtney, Max, Bonnie, and Patrick run towards the main parts of camp. Julia, McLovin, and Staci run into the woods. Scary jumps into the nearby water with a loud splash. Ass grips Julia’s wrist again and drags her towards the cabins. Michael stands, arms crossed while looking around.

“Um… nine minutes, dude,” Chris says.

“I’m thinking,”

---

MICHAEL: “Joner had a phase where he got really into competitive hide-and-seek. He even reached the national championships. He practiced with me until I got locked inside a washing machine and almost died of suffocation- never got found, though!”

---

Courtney shifts around the kitchen, opening the fridge and various cupboards to find somewhere they can fit. They open one near the end and see Max crouched inside.

“Hey!” he whisper-shouts. “Back off!”

“Oops,” Courtney says, just before hearing a click from the doorway. They turn just in time to see Chef cocking the water gun with a wicked smile. He aims and fires, though Courtney somersaults away just before the blast of water hits her- dousing Max instead.

“Oh, come on!”

"Sorry!" Courtney jumps out an open window and scrambles to their feet, running into the woods behind the cabins as Chef pulls Max out of the cupboard like he weighs nothing.

“Listen, I don’t mean to be rude,” Ass shouts from outside. “But can’t you walk any faster?”

"I'm walking!" Julia shouts back.

Chef gives a wicked grin and drags Max outside with him, approaching the bickering duo without them even noticing. Ass manages to catch some movement out of the corner of their eye and drops Julia’s wrist, abandoning her while running into the woods. “See! This is how you’re supposed to do it!” They shout as they sprint away.

Julia watches them go and then swallows a lump in their throat before screaming and running in the opposite direction, followed in close pursuit by Chef and Max.

---

Bonnie stands on one of the confessional toilets, locking the stall door and crouching to stay small and quiet. They hold their breath as the door opens, and a set of slow, methodical footsteps follow.

The footsteps stop right outside the stall they’re hidden in, and they begin shaking as someone tries the door.

“Relax, it’s not Chef,” Patrick’s voice rings out. “Bad hiding spot, huh?”

“I was betting more on the running part than the hiding part,” they whisper.

Patrick chuckles and steps into the stall next to them, locking it and standing on the toilet as well. “Well, you stole my idea anyway, so it's not so terrible,”

“Your first idea was the women’s restrooms?”

A brief pause. “This is the women’s? I’ve been using it all week,”

The door flies open and both immediately fall silent. Both doors are immediately kicked open and Chef stands outside, laughing evilly. Bonnie ducks and rolls, avoiding the spray while Patrick gets blasted backwards again.

He sighs, stepping out of the stall and wringing out his blazer. Max- standing behind Chef- rolls his eyes.

---

Ass walks through the woods, scanning the space around the trails for a suitable hiding place.

---

ASS: “It’s so hard to hide out there! I mean, it’s all just rocks and dirt and stuff! Granted, I don’t really get out much, but still!”

---

They step into a warm clearing and see a large dead tree with a hollow center- perfect. They grin and step up to it, attempting to climb in before a hand shoves them away.

“What the hell!” they shout.

Courtney’s head pops out of the trunk and they put a finger over their lips. “Find your own spot!”

Ass rolls their eyes for the millionth time so far this summer. “Oh, don’t be a tightwad, there’s plenty of room inside for both of us!”

“I was here first!”

“Jeez, I liked you a lot better when you were more of a pushover,” Ass says. “Just did what anyone suggested without thinking twice, huh? No wonder Mal got you to come here with a stupid post.”

Courtney grits their teeth. “You weren’t there,”

“But I saw it. Off the island, you know? Mal showed everyone,”

Courtney steps out of the tree to shove Ass backwards. They land on the grass with a thud and look up at Courtney with a glare.

“How’s that for a pushover?!” Courtney shouts.

Ass stands, growling, and they shove Courtney back. The two begin fighting, mostly throwing punches that never land and scratching each other while pulling the other’s hair.

The two momentarily pause as they both hear a scream, and then turn to see McLovin running on the main trail, Patrick in close pursuit. The two disappear for a second before the sound of a stream of water is heard and McLovin shrieks.

Courtney and Ass look at each other and let each other go before running in opposite directions.

---

Julia steps through the woods, her legs already covered in scratches and thistles from the plants as she walks off-trail. The sun is beating down, causing her to sweat and turning her cheeks a slight rosy-red, sure to be a sunburn later.

“The one day I run out of sunscreen…” she murmurs as she approaches a large rock formation.

She sighs, sitting on a nearby boulder and resting for a moment as the birds chirp and squirrels chitter. An eight-legged toad hops by and Julia takes a break from her break to record the sighting on a tiny, flimsy stack of sticky notes.

The sound of a mechanical whirring catches her attention and she immediately dives behind the boulder, looking around nervously.

Instead of Chef, though, something even stranger appears- a side of the rock formation slides into the earth, revealing a dark tunnel inside, and Scary steps out. Julia squints, and then her eyes widen in shock.

The large, rock-like door slides back up and Scary skips off into the forest. As she watches, Julia feels a hand on her shoulder and screams.

“Oh, relax. Don’t raise your blood pressure on my account,” Ass says. “Sorry about dumping you back there- panic mode, you know?”

“Yeah, I get it,” she sighs, standing alongside them as they walk into the woods.

“Is that where you were hiding? Behind a boulder?”

“No, I was just resting,”

Ass sighs. “Shoot. I was hoping you’d found a good spot,”

“Hehehe,”

Julia blinks. “What’s funny?”

“Um… I didn’t say anything,”

The two turn as a large shadow is casted over them, and Chef cocks the water gun once more. They both scream and run in opposite directions again.

---

Courtney sighs, finding a third hiding place in a small cave somewhere near the base of the big cliff. The opening is just big enough for a person to climb into, but the inside is wide and cavernous, if a little dark.

They blindly walk through the interior as the drips of condensation from the stalactites overhead echo along with their footsteps.

As they walk through the dark, they bump into something warm.

“Hey!” Bonnie says. “Who’s there?”

“Just me,” Courtney responds. “Bonnie?”

“Yeah?”

“Oh, good,”

A silence falls over the two as they look around the darkness awkwardly, though there’s really nothing to see.

“So… um, I wanted to tell you something,” Courtney says.

“Shoot,”

“I wanted to apologize for kinda icing you out like that. I was just… so tired of being everyone’s doormat, I thought the only way to win was to isolate myself,”

Bonnie sighs and shakes their head in the dark. “I feel the same. After Caesar left, I mean… I was barely able to function. I couldn’t handle getting close to someone and having them taken away again,”

“I understand- that’s how I felt about McLovin. He was the only person who treated me like a human instead of an accessory, I guess it kinda got to me,” Courtney sighs. “I don’t really have a ton of friends back home.”

“Yeah, me neither,” Bonnie says. “So... Friends?”

Courtney smiles through the darkness. “Friends,”

The two hug for a moment before an artificial light shines on them.

“Beautiful,” Chef’s voice rings out. Bonnie and Courtney stare as he wipes away a tear before both are doused in water.

---

CHEF: “Yeah, I was there the whole time. I didn’t want to interrupt!”

---

The two follow Chef outside, hand-in-hand while Max, McLovin, and Patrick stand beside the two.

“Who’s left?” Patrick asks.

“A lot of people,” McLovin sighs. “Split up?”

Chef rolls his eyes and shrugs. The captured competitors walk off, Bonnie and Courtney still together while the boys go on their own.

McLovin steps through the brush, eventually making his way back to camp. He walks around the cabins first, looking under beds and the porches before walking over to the confessional. He opens the door and sees Staci inside. She looks nervous, holding a finger to her lips.

McLovin smiles compassionately. “Don’t worry, I won’t rat you out!”

“But I will,” Patrick beams, stepping out of nowhere. “Oh, Chefy!”

Chef runs over and blasts Staci before she can even move. Patrick chuckles as they step out of the confessional, though his smile drops when they grab him by the tie and pull him down to their height.

McLovin and Chef wince as she beats the shit out of him while he squeals and screams.

---

Julia tails Scary as they scamper through the foliage. They’re insanely fast, forcing Julia to run after them, her sticky note collection in hand.

Scary leaps over a log and skitters into camp, which Julia trips and falls into, right onto Scary. Chef’s shadow looms over them and he chuckles as he blasts them both with freezing cold water.

---

Ass’ head ducks away from watching Julia and Scary get shot as they roll out of the woods, and they tiptoe away from the mess hall, looking for a final hiding place as time runs out. If their calculations are correct (and they usually are), there’s somewhere around three minutes left- perfectly enough time to win themselves invincibility.

“Not so fast,” Chef’s voice chuckles from behind them.

Ass whips around and sees him standing directly behind them, water gun aimed. They gasp and run for the docks in a zig-zag pattern, avoiding the blasts of water until they trip and slide down the docks, managing to grab a leg of the lifeguard chair just in time.

Courtney boos, earning them a glare as they pull themselves up again. “I guess I have immunity, huh?”

“Patrick, too!” Julia shouts, informing her ally. “But everyone else is here.”

Chef nods as Chris’ voice blasts over the intercom. “And that’s our time! Congratulations to Patrick, Ass, and Michael for winning immunity!”

The caught campers turn to each other, and Chef’s eyes narrow. “Michael,”

The boat of losers- docked nearby- bobs in the water as Michael steps out of it and right onto the docks. “Is it over?”

---

MICHAEL: “I really didn't think about it much. I just asked myself, “where's somewhere no one would think to look?””

---

A few campers cheer as she walks over, though Ass glares.

---

Michael sits outside the mess hall as the sun sets over the lake, admiring the sky. She’s not particularly hungry, and doesn’t want to deal with everyone inside, thus she feels a sinking sensation in her stomach when she hears the door open and someone step next her.

Julia plops down, looking her over. “Good game today, huh?”

“Cut the crap,”

“Alright, have it your way,” she rolls her eyes. “Last elimination, you said you’d vote with me. You owe me for voting Kelly even after Ass said not to. I got into some deep shit cause of you.”

“Okay, fine. Who do you want me to vote for?”

Julia leans over and whispers in Michael’s ear. She sighs.

Patrick steps out of the confessional and sees the two on the grass outside. He straightens his tie and attempts to fix his hair, still covered in scratches and bruises from Staci’s earlier attack.

He stands in front of the two. “Discussing votes?”

Julia’s eyes narrow. “None of your-”

“I’m voting with her,” he points to Michael. “So I’d like to know who.”

Michael raises an eyebrow while Julia stares in shock.

---

“Campers- you played hard, but ultimately did a very bad job at it. On this plate are a collection of delicious, perfectly fluffy marshmallows- all but one of you will be getting one tonight,” Chris says, holding up the platter.

“Patrick- Ass- Michael. You won immunity today,” he says, tossing them their marshmallows. “The following are also safe:

Staci

McLovin

Scary

And Bonnie,”

Max and Courtney look at each other, both a bit nervous and both trying not to show it. Michael and Bonnie watch in anxious anticipation nearby.

“And the last marshmallow… goes to…

Max. You’re safe. Courtney- sorry, my guy,”

Courtney sighs, but stands with decorum and walks down the docks confidently.

---

COURTNEY: “I may not have won, but I accomplished what I came here for, and got to punch a few people along the way. I would consider that a win in and of itself,” they pause, suddenly looking sad. “I just hope Bonnie is okay without me.”

---

Courtney steps onto the boat, taking a seat. Chef turns from the captain’s cockpit and salutes them. “Good work, soldier,”

They salute back with a smile.

“Who will go home tomorrow? And who will stay to play? Find out next time- on Total! Takes! Island!”

#tti #total takes island

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transkholins · 11 months ago

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so i've been reading the legends x-wing series. and, as one would guess, they're really not very good, but in the throes of my most recent finals week, i wanted something kind of bad and easy to read in the midst of my dense textbooks. and the thing is that the first four are perfectly situated between the dissolution of the ussr and 9/11. so they have really clear red scare influences, like, for example, the sleeper agent brainwashing facility named after a kgb building. but bush hadn't even been elected yet, so michael a. stackpole could have his protagonist's space fighter jet get hijacked by imperial holdouts and remotely flown into a skyscraper. and then when the alliance built a memorial, he could have those same imperial holdouts blow up the memorial. and he could also put one of his other protagonists on trial for potentially orchestrating the hijacking. if they were published five years later OR were at all good enough to be remembered, star wars would have been absolutely done for.

#they aren't good but they are enjoyable. in a weird sort of way. i couldn't possibly recommend them.#matt speaks #star wars

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grigori77 · 1 year ago

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Movies of 2023 - My Summer Rundown (Part 1)

The Runners-Up:

20. TRANSFORMERS: RISE OF THE BEASTS – it’s telling that we didn’t get a truly GREAT live action Transformers movie until Michael Bay stepped back into a mere producer capacity and we got 2018’s brilliant soft-reboot Bumblebee. This new film feels like something of a step back to Bay’s more OTT chaos, but they’ve still learned the lessons from that ridiculous excess to bring us a direct sequel to that ingenious restart, Creed II director Steven Caple Jr. going bigger this time but still reining in the excess with impressive focus for an explosively exciting and still endearingly heartfelt action adventure. The end results are still clunky but a good deal better than Bay’s misfires, and entertaining, affecting and genuinely thrilling if you just let yourself go with it …

19. TO CATCH A KILLER – honestly, I could hardly call Argentine filmmaker Damian Szifron’s taut suspense thriller an international big break considering it only received a limited theatrical release before becoming a relative promo-free sleeper on streaming, but this is one of those underdog movies that really deserves a lot more attention than it received. Divergent’s Shailene Woodley is electrifying as Eleanor, a troubled Baltimore PD officer who, after a nightmarish sniper attack and bombing, becomes an unofficial investigator under the guidance of FBI manhunter Lammark (an ON-FIRE Ben Mendelsohn) as he races to track down a brutal domestic terrorist before they commit another atrocity.

18. HEART OF STONE – Gal Gadot stretches her action heroine muscles outside of playing Wonder Woman as superspy Rachel Stone/Nine of Hearts, a top agent in a mysterious covert intelligent agency known as the Charter, who must go it alone when a former partner makes a play for the quantum computing AI that helps them fight international threats. Director Tom Parker (The Aeronauts, Wild Rose, Peaky Blinders) reveals previously largely untapped action talent as he turns The Old Guard comics-writer’s blistering screenplay into an exciting, fast-paced action thriller that’s sure to impress fans of Netflix’ previous dabbles in the genre.

17. ORGAN TRAIL – another indie underdog that snuck in VERY MUCH under the radar, this supremely twisted psychological horror western from Drop Dead Gorgeous director Michael Patrick Jann and newcomer screenwriter Meg Turner deserves A WHOLE LOT of attention. Zoe De Grand Maison (Orphan Black, Riverdale) lights up the screen as Abigail Archer, a young girl in snow-bound 1870s Montana who’s forced to grow up REAL FAST when her family is murdered by a band of marauding outlaws who make a brutal living attacking travelling groups of would-be settlers for their money and supplies.

16. INDIANA JONES & THE DIAL OF DESTINY – 2008’s Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was such a disappointment compared to the giddy heights of Steven Spielberg’s original stone-cold CLASSIC action adventure trilogy that I went into this film with very low expectations, so I was VERY PLEASANTLY SURPRISED to see that this is actually a whole lot of fun and a GLORIOUS return to form for Harrison Ford’s now VERY OLD Nazi-fighting treasure hunter and professor of archaeology. With Spielberg and George Lucas largely stepping back into producing duties here, Logan writer-director James Mangold has taken up the reins instead, delivering an engagingly nostalgic thrill-ride which beautifully redeems Indiana Jones for a new generation while also giving the character a suitably grand send-off …

15. THE PRINCE – while not technically a feature film, I was SO thoroughly impressed by this filmed performance of the revolutionary Shakespearean deconstruction play by actress, playwright and influential YouTuber Abigail Thorn that I couldn’t resist giving it a nod here. Thorn shines bright as a distinctly unconventional take on Harry “Hotspur” Pierce in Henry IV, an anthropomorphised play character who becomes ensnared in a radical shake-up of their life-story when a pair of humans from THE REAL WORLD become trapped in the play itself and wind up entirely sabotaging the narrative. It’s a fascinating experience, a revolutionary game-changer of a show which takes Shakespeare and turns his works ENTIRELY on their head while addressing important themes of genre identity, sexuality and intolerance, and this is glaring proof that this is a production which deserves to be seen whether it’s in this Nebula video presentation or performed live on stage.

14. BARBIE – Oppenheimer’s bizarre unexpected twin when it came to be released in cinemas is, in many ways, just as important a film, but for very different reasons. After languishing in Development Hell since 2009, writer-director Greta Gerwig finally realised this genuinely BIZARRE screwball comedy sort-of biopic of the iconic fashion doll range from Mattel, unleashing the character upon the world IN THE LIVING FLESH in the simply PERFECT (from a casting point of view) form of Margot Robbie. She’s simply AMAZING here as “Stereotypical Barbie”, who finds herself going through an existential crisis after some girl starts “playing with her wrong” in the real world, but the film is frequently stolen right out from under her by Ryan Gosling as her so-called boyfriend Ken, who went ALL OUT to bring the most fundamentally useless boy-toy in history to life …

13. MEG 2: THE TRENCH – supremely creepy indie cinema director Ben Wheatley may seem like a distinctly ODD choice to helm a follow-up to 2018’s most delightfully off-the-wall runaway action horror smash hit, but he actually proves to be a perfect hit because he clearly GETS the inherent silliness of this franchise. Cinema’s all-time greatest living “special effect”, Jason Statham, returns as deep sea rescue diver and professional giant shark-puncher Jonas Taylor, once again wrapped up in a whole heap of trouble when not one but this time THREE massive prehistoric megaladons escape the abyssal Trench and start munching on South Pacific tourists, but this time matters are further complicated when he also has to deal with a conglomerate of dastardly strip-miners looking to exploit the Trench’s rare earth metal resources for their own ends …

12. THE ANGRY BLACK GIRL & HER MONSTER – debuting writer-director Bomani J. Story brings Frankenstein to the inner-city projects as haunted teenage genius Vicaria (the new TV series of The Equalizer’s Laya DeLeon Hayes) reanimates her gangbanger big brother Chris (Kill a Prophet and Warrior Soul’s Edem Atsu-Swanzy) after he’s gunned down in a turf war. The results are a dark and disturbing slowburn psychological body horror that deals head-on with socially resonant issues of drugs, urban poverty and gang culture while also delivering a unique and challenging new twist on one of the most classic stories in the history of science-fiction and horror …

11. TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES: MUTANT MAYHEM – another animated feature that’s following the inventive new lead of the Spider-Verse movies, this latest big screen incarnation for Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird’s zeitgeisty comics creations is a genuine riot which takes the original core concept and runs it through a delightfully skewed comedic blender to form a compelling new narrative basis for what’s sure to be a fantastic new film series. Comedy screenwriting/producing masters Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg team up with up-and-coming young writer-director Jeff Rowe (The Mitchells Vs. the Machines) to bring the youthful mutant quartet to vivid life with plenty of visual flair, anarchic chaotic humour and a whole lot of heart, and I for one can’t wait for more.

#movies 2023 #2023 in movies #transformers rise of the beasts #to catch a killer #heart of stone #heart of stone netflix #organ trail #organ trail movie #indiana jones and the dial of destiny #the prince #the prince abigail thorn #abigail thorn the prince #barbie #the barbie movie #meg 2: the trench #the angry black girl and her monster #teenage mutant ninja turtles mutant mayhem

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