#slavsquatting

[bibleofficial]

went to the beach w kp & 4 other indian friends & 3 of us had NEVER surfed before girl WHEW it’s SO fun literally only 20quid to rent a wetsuit & board & i fucking smashed my toes on the sand so much, but also we 1) got the wrong tickets so we got off 1 stop early 2) went to find a bus & the bus that was supposed to be 15 min turned into an HOUR 3) on our way to find a bus back everyone’s phones are dying or dead bc it took us 3hrs longer to get there, cigarettes are out 4) all of the shops in town are closed & the town seems to have ONLY a tesco extra & 1 off license that sells a PACK FOR 15.65 A PACK WHICH IS FUCKING CRIMINAL ITS CHEAPER TO BUY IT FROM TESCO ARE U INSANE 5) the bus back to the other town kept skipping us bc the bus stop wasn’t the ACTUAL bus stop - i had 1 bowl since literally 11a & we got back at fucking 11p 😭😭😭

[tapiocasketches]

Now I'm just imagining Murph slavsquatting on a cliff, like those mountain goats lmao

random headcanon from your sketches: Murph can slavsquat everywhere. innate ability.

new headcanon unlocked all witches have the Slavsquat Pelvis™

[stag-bi]

finnish city-bunny fursona slavsquatting and holding a carrot like a joint in one hand and a monster can in the other. finished commission for @jethroq 😎🐇

[liveleaker]

I was slavsquatting outside hitting my cart and my 40+ year old coworker said "you remind me of some dudes I used to chill with in chicago" what did he mean

[ph-cutie]

slavsquat memes are annoying idgaf but they are right in making fun of people who squat with their heels up. this is a disaster waiting to happen

[rhymingteelookatme]

#and in this light #every man from a squatting culture who argues that women should not sit on their haunches because it's “unladylike” #you are shameful to your foremothers whose squatting hips birthed and preserved your bloodline #by picking metric shit tons of berries

I have a theory about the evolution of the slavsquat. I will cite no sources because I have lost track of where I've read anything I remember, or whether any part of it is actually correct.

As we all know, "natural selection" is not a conscious, intelligently designed process, but essentially just the mindless forces of nature throwing spaghetti on the wall and not even observing what sticks - whatever sticks to the wall is just the features that the next generation of this particular life form is going to have. Nothing in nature happens by plan nor purpose, it just does. Including different inherent human traits.

Slavsquat is a combination of nature and nurture - while most people can train themselves to do it, through systematic stretching, most people who tend to squat have simply done so since childhood, and have therefore retained the flexibility to achieve the position comfortably and developed the balancing muscle to stay in it. However, there is a structural component to this - some peoples' hip joints are simply not the right depth for them to be able to comfortably do a full heels-on-the-ground squat for any prolonged time. Baltic and Slavic people tend to predominantly have the hip structure more fit for squatting.

While no trait emerges to fulfill some specific purpose, no feature becomes widespread unless it's somehow useful (or closely linked to an useful trait while itself being harmless). Such as the ability to digest lactosis in regions where the farming dairy cattle is the most efficient way to get calories from the ground, or lighter skin tone to get more vitamin D from the sun in places where the winter is long and dark, and edible berries and mushrooms are only in season for a few weeks each.

And how does the slavsquat come into this? What evolutionary benefit could there possibly be in having the ability to comfortably sit on one's haunches for prolonged amounts of time? And that is the point where I've been getting to: Peak foraging efficiency.

Most edible berries in Northern and Eastern Europe are ankle-high shrubs in the vaccinium genus, which are most efficiently gathered while squatting down. As the berries are only in season for a brief time, they must be gathered as efficiently as possible before their time is over, and preserved for the winter all at once. Households with best berry pickers had the most berries preserved for the winter, and survived through the cold season better than those without.

[reallyinkyhands]

Tagged by: @thepondstogether . Thank you for the tag friend <3

Tag people you want to get to know better!

Last song: Love You So Bad - Ezra Furman

Currently watching: Succession with my partner, and binging the Knowing Better videos on Youtube I haven’t seen yet.

Currently reading: I’m taking a bit of a break while I am studying for my exams and thesis defence, but I stopped in the middle of Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi.

Current obsessions: Having a toast with cream cheese spread (Lučina for my Slovak girlies).

Thank you for the tag! I’m tagging @slavsquatting-rat @ultimaid @cat-athea @gatheringkeepsakes @zeesqueere (no pressure anyone) and anyone else who feels like doing it!

[dieletztepanzerhexe]

Saw a slavic gargoule today (a man slavsquatting right next to a liquor store smoking a ciggy with Perła Chmielowa beer in the other hand)

[genshoomf]

ghost slavsquatting can be so personal actually. especially when you hc him as polish jewish <-- projecting just a smidge

[mizzmellos]

#SLAVSQUAT GANG RISE UP!!!

[thirstyforred]

if i was good at drawing i would do fanart of my tav Nam, Karlach and Mithara slavsquating and smoking in the Underdark, with Gale standing dismayed over them

[vacuumdecayocs]

Elements Tag: Rina Sugimoto

Bold what applies and Italic what sometimes applies.

AIR.

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch small animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE.

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped and torn styles of clothing / i play a sport / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy traveling / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER.

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love candle light /  i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love /i love the chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER.

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

Tagged by: no one, found this on tumblr myself ^^

Tagging: @zeesaes for Devin and/or Marya, @ultimaid for Kirumi and @slavsquatting-rat for Akvida <3

[becquerel]

Slavic serkets real. I bet vris could pop a damn good slavsquat

real ^ exact reason

[reallyinkyhands]

@cassiopeai @slavsquatting-rat

*after gossiping* pleasure doing bitchness with you

[liveleaker]

the most emotionally confusing moment of my life was when the honorary linecook drug dealer walked in on me slavsquatting with my vape in the cooler and said you look like that guy from death note

[reallyinkyhands]

So I finally did it. One thing that Dracula Daily has been good for was that it inspired me to tackle a meal I’ve been a little intimidated by. So today, I make paprikáš.

It’s rather delicious and I want to shout out @slavsquatting-rat for the recipe, moral support and the genius idea to add mushrooms.

[ID: Two pictures of chicken paprikash on a deep dish decorated with a pattern of a white goose with blue ribbon tie. First picture features a closeup of the dish - chicken in red cream sauce with tarhonya side dish, the second picture is the plate on a rustic wooden table with a bottle of Pilsner Urquell beer in the background. End ID.]