#skz slow burn

[atinyniki]

100 things i like love about you.

group: stray kids !

pairing: nonidol!lee know x f!reader

genre: romance, slow burn, fluff, little angst???

warnings + additional info: reader is referred to as y/n, drinking, vomiting, kissing, other members of JYP groups are side characters, overthinker lino, whipped reader, lee know is referred to as minho and min.

authors note: hiii im niki (nikita) ! this is my first time writing a fic and i decided to try and make one for lee knows birthday. english is not my first language, so please excuse any grammatical or spelling errors. happy reading :)

wc: 6191

(pt. 2)

it’s mid july and you’re sat at your computer at home, unable to think about what you should get your roommate for his birthday. 

it’s never too early to plan right?

minho had given you the best birthday you could have possibly asked for. he brought you all of your favorite snacks and you two pulled an all nighter watching dorky kdramas. 

you truly didn’t know how to feel about the gift he gave you at the end of the day though. all he gave you was an envelope before he headed to bed. 

you still remember everything that was said in the note he gave you. you didn’t know minho had it in him to write such a beautiful letter. inside were a few cute polaroids you guys took over the years as well.

you wanted minho’s birthday gift to be as special as his was to you. 

then it hit you.

the best idea ever.

you decide to call it “100 things”. you knew minho deserved a thoughtful gift, and you knew he’d appreciate it. you immediately went out to buy cute notecards and kitty print washi tape.

once you returned, you got back on your laptop and check the date. 

july 16… perfect !

you decided that you’re going to use this extra day to plan. you open an empty document and start creating a list. 

at first, you thought it’d be too difficult to think of so many things, but once you actually started writing it was difficult to stop yourself. you start wondering if minho would realize your true feelings towards him after reading all those cards.

it was no secret to you or your friends that you’ve been head over heels for lee minho for the past two or so years. 

you make sure to brainstorm carefully. you don’t know what you would do if he were to find out, and quite honestly you didn’t want to pain yourself with the thought either.

you were brought out of your thoughts when you heard a loud knock on the door. you quickly saved your progress, and shut your laptop. 

“come in!”

as soon as minho opened the door, you were met with a toothy grin on his face. 

“i made your favorite, are you hungry?” you nodded quickly, blushing a little at the gesture, but not enough for minho to notice.

slowly, you got out of your chair and made your way to the door. you senses were immediately filled with the savory aromas, and you couldn’t help but smile.

you’ve always loved minho’s cooking, and minho loved cooking, so it worked out perfectly for the both of you. 

what you didn’t know though, was that the main reason he always cooked for you was to see that adorable smile on your face while you were eating. he loved the way your cheeks would puff up whenever you stuffed more food in your mouth and how you’d thank him with a grin after every meal. 

he didn’t mean to be weird, but he always found himself staring at you while eating. normally, he’d try to focus on finishing his food but he couldn’t help but watch your cheeks inflate more and more. 

this time was no different. you used the chopsticks to quickly fish out the bell peppers, something minho noticed you’ve always done. 

you glance over at minho to see that he’s not even half done with his plate yet. 

“what’s wrong? are you not hungry?”

“oh no, sorry. i just zoned out i guess” he continued eating but stopped again when he noticed your eyes soften.

“do you want to watch a movie after this? you don’t have to, i just thought you needed a break from all your wo-“

“yeah of course y/n.” he cut off your rambling, and chuckled a little at your words. you smiled back, quickly finishing your food and getting up to wash your plate. 

minho finished not too long after, and he went to go meet you at the couch. “so what do you want to watch?” you asked. “we can continue watching that show we were watching earlier if you want” 

you put on the show and laid back, grabbing a blanket from your side to lay over the both of you. minho stared intently at the tv, and you were starting to think he loved this show even more than you did. soon you found yourself staring at his eyes, his gaze still focused on the tv. you made a mental note to add it to the list. there was just something about his brown boba eyes that you found so perfect. 

soon, you started to doze off, but tried your best to stay awake. it was the best part of the show, when the leads find out they’ve been in love with each other for months, but you were tired. you’ve studied for so long today, and you just couldn’t keep your eyes open anymore. 

your eyes slowly fluttered shut, your breathing becoming even. not too long after, the episode ended and minho was broken out of his trance. he was so focused on the plot that he didn’t even notice you had fallen asleep. a smile slowly appeared on his face, you looked so peaceful when you were sleeping. 

minho carefully pushed himself off the couch, not wanting to wake you, and went over to your room. he pulled up the covers and kept the door wide open. 

quickly, he made his way back to the living room and picked you up, making sure not to shake you that much. he carried you to your room, silently giggling at the way you nuzzled into his warmth. he placed you down on the bed carefully, and tucked you in. 

he left your room and shut the door behind him. he wondered if you could hear how fast his heart was beating. he noticed the kitty washi tape on your desk, and reminded himself to ask you if he could borrow it later.

you woke up the next morning, not remembering how you got into your bed. you got ready for the day ahead, even though you were gonna spend most of it inside. 

you quickly made yourself a bagel, and headed back to your room to write. you decided on writing about his bunny teeth first. his cute bunny teeth that would peek out whenever he was sleeping or focused on something. you thought his bunny teeth suited him wonderfully.

you made sure to make the note sound as friendly as possible, you didn’t want to ruin your friendship after all. you kept writing, but it all sounded too sappy. when you finally got it right, you put all the wasted notecards in the bin, and headed to the living room again to watch the last of the episode you missed last night. 

on your way to the living room, you passed by minho’s room, but you didn’t expect him to still be asleep. his bunny teeth were on full display, and you couldn’t help but smile at the way his face is still puffy from his sleeping state.

you quickly make your way to the kitchen, cooking breakfast for minho to surprise him.  

noticing that he wasn’t awake yet, you left the house as quietly as you could and ran to the local convenience store to buy him some pudding. 

once you reenter your house, you see minho walking out of the corridor, indicating that he’s probably just gotten ready for the day. he was surprised to see food on the table, and even more surprised to see 3 cups of pudding in your hands. the second he saw what you were holding, his eyes lit up and he grinned. 

“awhhh you did all this for meeee?” he teased. “shut up, this is just for last night” you retorted. you made your way to minho and handed him a pudding cup, storing the remaining two in the fridge to cool. 

“thank you, y/n”

you were a little thrown off by the sincerity in his voice, contradicting the teasing voice he had just used. your heart fluttered at the tone, “your welcome” you quickly mumbled.

you watched as he quickly finished his food and headed back to his room. you didn’t really feel like watching your show right now anymore, so you walked back into your room to quickly complete your list.

a week later, you were working on an upcoming assignment, and you jumped a little when you heard your phone ringing. you smiled when you saw the name, “jinnie” written in bold at the top.

“hyunjin! hey, what’s up?”

“hey y/nnie. i was just wondering if you were coming to the party tonight!” you weren’t much of a partier, it wasn’t really your thing. “probably not, why?” hyunjins exaggerated groan made you laugh. 

“but you never come to parties! please?” he begged. “no, there’s nothing to do there anyways”

“what do you mean? there’s lots to do! we play so many games and…” 

“and…?”

“minho’s gonna be there”

“wait what? minho never goes to parties though?” you were careful not to talk too loudly so minho wouldn’t hear. “yeah, he wanted to see chan since it’s been so long”, hyunjin started giggling at how invested you were now. 

“fine, i’ll think about it, but only if minho agrees to drive me.” 

“fine with me! hopefully i’ll see you there y/nnie. bye now!” you laughed a little at his excitement. “bye jinnie” 

minho was deep in his work during your phone call, trying to think of new lines to implement into his song. all of a sudden, he heard a knock on his door. “come in!”

you make your way into his room stepping over the mess on the floor. you know he always gets like this when he’s working on new songs. “are you going to the party tonight?”

“yeah, you going?”

“yeah, hyunjin somehow convinced me to” you awkwardly chuckle. 

“i’m guessing you need a ride?”, you laughed. “well yeah, obviously”, you retorted, rolling your eyes. he chuckled at your actions, “i’d be happy to drive you”

you walk over to him and ruffle his hair playfully “thanks min!” and you trotted out. all he could do was stare at the door as left, still in shock. he started to wonder if you’d play with his hair like that if you two were actually together, but he quickly snapped himself out of it and decided not to pain himself with such thoughts. 

a couple hours later, you pick out a nice red dress and do your makeup. you know jisung’s parties are always crazy, hyunjin’s always talking about them. you expect there to be a lot of partying, so you dress nice.

you make your way out just on time, minho’s exiting his room too, but halts his movements when he sees you. he’s never seen you like this before, and suddenly he feels underdressed. he can’t seem to take his eyes off of you. 

you seem to notice this, and your confidence has suddenly boosted. “you can stop staring now”, a smug smile plastered on your face. 

minho meets your gaze and suddenly realizes what he’s been doing. “oh what- wait sorry i didnt realize i was-“, you giggled at his stammering.

“dork”

you quickly made your way to the entrance of your home. minho’s ears start to turn the same shade as his crimson cheeks, frozen in the corridor.

“COME ON WE’RE GONNA BE LATE” you yell from the hall. 

he rushes to the door and grabs his keys, locking the door behind him and settling in his car. he waits for you to get in, and then you’re off to jisung’s.

the drive wasn’t too far away, but it felt like forever for minho. you were sat there humming a song in peace, but he couldn’t get his mind off of what happened before in the hall. 

could you see how much he liked you? did he make you uncomfortable? thoughts like these were running through his mind the entire time, but he was just hoping that he could forget about them at the party.

when you both walked into jisung’s house, you were instantly greeted by changbin, who was sitting on the couch near the front door with hyunjin. 

“Y/N! YOU MADE IT” hyunjin yelled out of excitement.

“YAH! keep it down hyunjin” changbin scolded.

you laughed and made your way into the kitchen, where you saw chan greet minho with a smile. you were met with ryujin and yuna, who squealed at the sight of you. 

“y/n… finally at a party hm?”, yuna said as she pulled you in for a hug. ryujin chimed in, “that dress is gorgeous by the way”. you smiled, “thank you”. you don’t wear dresses very often, but they make you feel pretty. maybe you should start wearing them more. 

the drinks were all set out on the table, you haven’t had any alcohol in a while. minho had already told you beforehand that he wouldn’t be drinking so he could drive you home safe, so you figured you might as well. you took a shot with yeji. 

and another.

and then another…

it was too early in the party to get wasted, but to be honest you didn’t really care. it’s been a while since you drank and you wanted to let loose.

“shall we start the games?” asked jisung.

“what types of games?” questioned changbin. 

“oh you know… the usual”

you haven’t been to any of ji’s parties, so you weren’t really sure what the usual was. it’s not like you were sober enough to care anyways.

the set of games started with 7 minutes in heaven. 

minho’s heart dropped. he was scared. the thought of you kissing one of the guys here made him sick to his stomach. 

“y/n’s turn first!”, seungmin slurred.

you slowly went over to the hat to pick a name out. 

“chan” you read aloud. 

slowly, chan got up and led you to the room. it was dark, but the rules were the rules. you sat down on the bed with chan, a small frown on your face. 

he laughed a little at your disappointment, “what’s wrong, were you hoping to pick minho?” 

your eyes widened and you stared up to look at him. “how did you-“ 

“you’re not very good at hiding your feelings you know”, he cuts you off and smiles at you again. 

“i’m sorry chan, i know this isn’t how the game is really supposed to be played but i want to save my first kiss for someone special and-“ 

“FIRST KISS?!” chan screamed.

you smacked a hand over his mouth, “shut up they’ll hear you!” you whispered

“sorry, sorry” he mumbled

minho heard chan through the thin walls of the room. it wasn’t too hard to hear considering the fact that chan practically yelled it. minho’s heart dropped straight to his stomach. did chan just steal your first kiss? were you even thinking straight considering that you were drunk?

questions ran through his mind, and hyunjin noticed minho’s eyes darting around the room. hyunjin holds on to minho’s shoulder, “you okay min?” 

“yeah i’m fine, i’m gonna go grab some water” 

once minho returns, he sees that you and chan have already left the room. 

“have fun you two?” jeongin teased.

“you know we did”, you replied with a wink.

chan started laughing, and the lump growing in minho’s throat started growing bigger. 

suddenly, you felt sick. it was probably the alcohol, so you quickly excused yourself to the bathroom. 

worried, minho followed you there, only to see you on the ground in front of the toilet. he quickly rushed to you and held your hair so it wouldn’t get wet. you were embarrassed but it’s not like you could really do anything when you’re throwing up buckets. 

you had finally calmed down and looked at him. his hands were intertwined with yours, and you made sure to add his touch to the list too. pure worry swirled around in his chocolate eyes.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean-“ 

“it’s okay. are you feeling better? do you want to leave?”

you really did just want to go home and rest, but didn’t want minho to miss out on the fun.

“do you want to stay?”, you asked hesitantly. 

“if you’re feeling sick i’m more than happy to bring you home now y/n.” ‘you’re my top priority’ he wanted to add. 

he helped you up and dried your face after you washed it, he preferred you without makeup anyways. it was easier to see your perfect features clearly. he tucked a stray hair sticking to your forehead behind your ear, and walked out of the bathroom with you. 

“guys y/n is feeling a little sick so we’ll have to be leaving now. sorry to cut it so short” he quickly announces. he leads you out, listening to the “get well soon!”s and “hope you feel better”s. the drive back home is silent. minho can’t stop thinking about what happened between you and chan today. he didn’t know that you’ve never kissed anyone before. and now that he knows, he wished you had saved it for him. 

you arrive home and he walks you back into your room. minho brings you your sweats and a t-shirt, his t-shirt, along with a pair of undergarments straight from the dryer. you reminded yourself to add to the list later. you admired how caring he was towards people, even if he didn’t show it much.

“call me if you need help okay? i’ll be right outside the door. tell me when you’re done changing” 

not too long after, you call him back in your room. he smiled at you, the oversized t-shirt hanging off one of your shoulders. he probably thought you’d be too drunk to notice, but you couldn’t stop thinking about what it would be like if you were to steal his clothes everyday to wear. 

you make your way into the bed, exhausted and tired from what had happened earlier. minho places a glass of water next to you, and sits down on the bed next to you. you didn’t mean to, but you couldn’t stop yourself from cuddling up into the warmth of his body.

he let himself sink down a little in the pillows, so it was more comfortable for you. his heart was beating so fast that he thought you could hear it. he couldn’t control his thoughts, and his mind drifted back to what happened between you and chan.

“was chan really your first kiss?, he asks softly. you suddenly felt a pang in your chest. “no, we just talked. i told him i wanted to save my first kiss for someone special and he kind of freaked”

minho let out a light sigh of relief, and prayed you didn’t hear. he began to rub soothing circles on your back with his thumbs.

you know minho isn’t a very big fan of physical touch, but the gesture didn’t go unnoticed. in fact, you couldn’t stop thinking about it. you felt tears well up in your eyes, no one has really taken the time to care for you like this. 

as much as you tried to fight it, light sobs shook your body. you’ve been so overwhelmed with your feelings, you truly just needed a hug. minho felt your body shake, and pulled away in panic.

he slid down further on the bed. “what’s wrong? are you okay?”, he made sure to speak softly. he didn’t want to overwhelm you. you clutched his shirt tightly in your hands, balled into fists. 

he was scared. he didn’t know what was wrong, but the least he could do was be there for you. he stayed. he made sure to stay awake till you fell asleep. and soon after, sleep overtook his body as well.

you never talked about that night after that. you woke up in his arms that day, you still remember the way your heart started doing somersaults. he later brought you all the essentials for your hangover, and cooked you some food too. you couldn’t get over the domesticity of it all. you wanted him to be there for the rest of your life. you just couldn’t spit it out already.

you never returned his shirt.

a couple weeks later, you’re writing another card again, this time about his ears. you found it adorable the way they would get red whenever he was flustered.

you hear the door open and check the time. it’s late, almost half past midnight. you open your door to see a disheveled minho staring at you. your heart cracks at the sight. 

“sorry, did i wake you? i just got back from dance, i didn’t-“

“no it’s fine, i was up working on… a couple assignments. are you okay?”

minho didn’t answer your question. not because he was ignoring you but just because he didn’t know how to.

you tell him you’d be right back, and run over to the bathroom, leaving him in the hallways confused. while he waits for you, he places down his bag and gets out a comfortable shirt and some sweats.

you run a warm bubble bath for him, making sure it wasn’t uncomfortably hot, and put in a couple bath salts to color the water a soft shade of pink. 

you make your way back to minho’s room. “min”, you spoke softly, “i ran you a bubble bath”

his heart twists at your tone, he wasn’t expecting something like this. he wanted to thank you, but he was too exhausted to do so, so he just smiled. he walked over to the bathroom and locked the door. you hoped he’d feel better soon.

it was early september now, and you were writing another one of your notes. you thought minho would really appreciate your gift, you just had a lot of trouble making it sound more platonic. 

minho knocked on your door again, handing you a plate with cut up fruit on it. you smiled at him, “thanks min”. and got back to work. 

“what’re you working on?” 

“oh nothing important, just a present”

he didn’t think anything of it so he left it alone. as he was walking out, he saw your trash bin filled to the brim. “i’ll swap this out”

“oh sorry! i didn’t notice it was that full already. thanks again minho”

now, minho wasn’t trying to snoop. he was honestly just trying to help you. he was taking out the trash when one of the scrapped notecards fell out the bin. he picked it up and read the title. ‘your lips’

he wasn’t quite sure what that meant, but he was curious, and couldn’t stop himself from reading the rest. ‘i love the way your lips sit-‘ and just a bunch of scribbles. 

his heart drops. were you writing love letters to someone? he picked up another one. ‘your warmth’ ‘i love the way your warmth makes me feel like im wrapped in a safety blanket-’ and more scribbles

who was making you feel this way? minho decided not to ask about it. he didn’t think you’d appreciate his snooping. he trashed the letters and made his way into his room. he wrapped himself in a blanket, but his room just felt cold.

everything felt cold. minho felt cold. maybe he was too late. maybe he should have confessed to you a year ago. he felt empty. he couldn’t sleep that night. 

it was nearing the end of october now, meaning minho’s birthday was coming up. you two have gotten closer over the past couple months, and you couldn’t be more grateful, but recently he seemed off.

when you wake up, you quickly go to the convenience store to grab some flour. even though you already had a gift, you wanted his birthday to be special. he had no plans so you figured why not? 

while at the store, you also made sure to pick up some blue food dye for the frosting.

recently, minho couldn’t get seem to get out out his mind. he wondered if you were a secret admirer of someone, or maybe you were seeing them. he hasn’t been as affectionate recently either, he didn’t want to ruin anything for you.

it’s october 24th now, just one more day until his birthday. you prepare your cards, and place them neatly in a decorated blue box. you decided that you’d write the last one at midnight on his birthday along with a small letter. 

you leave your room to see minho at the kitchen table, quickly eating lunch before he went out for groceries. 

you groaned “oh come on, stay home! it’s your birthday tomorrow for gods sake.” he laughed at your whining “i’ll go, just text me the list.”, you continued.

“nah i need some fresh air anyways. do you want to…”, he trailed off.

“want to what?”

“would you like to come with me?”

you didn’t understand why he was so hesitant, but you nodded and just grabbed your jacket. 

you both arrived at the shop and you immediately ran off towards the pastry section. minho had to chase after you so he didn’t lose you.

“do you want the cherry or the peach filled ones?”, you asked him excitedly.

“cherry”

minho couldn’t help but smile at you. he wished he could go grocery shopping with you for the rest of his life, but he couldn’t. he stopped his mind before it could get off track, and decided to focus on his time with you instead. 

you two finish grocery shopping, and you made sure to grab an extra two cups of pudding. 

it was now nearing the end of the day, only two hours before midnight. you set up your gift, and got your last card ready for writing later. 

as the time got closer, you suddenly became nervous. you were worried that minho would be able to see right through you and discover your true feelings. 

it’s was only ten minutes before his birthday. once you had finished brainstorming what you would write on his last card, you made your way over to his room at 11:58. 

you knocked quietly on the door. “min? can i come in?”. no answer.

you thought he’d fallen asleep, so you opened the door and peered through the crack, not wanting the hallways lights to wake him. to your surprise you see minho at his desk, busy with some work. he hummed along to the tune of the track, his voice low.

he hadn’t heard you come in due to his noise-canceling headset. you checked your phone. october 25. you slowly walked over to his chair where he was sitting and put your hands over his. 

he shook a little bit, a little surprised by the sudden touch and he took off his headset. “sorry i didn’t mean to startle you…”, you paused. “happy birthday min”

he teared up a little at the softness in your voice while saying this. he felt a smile tug at the corners of his lips, and soon it became a grin. you were happy to see him smile, and wondered if he’d feel the same way after opening your gift. “thank you y/n”.

you heard a small quiver in his voice, but accounted it for his tiredness.

“go to sleep soon, we have a long day tomorrow”

“oh yeah? what are we doing?”, you giggled. “making you the best cake you’ll ever have”, he smiled at your confidence. he was a great cook, but isn’t all that great at making sweets. 

“thank you, y/n. it means a lot that you waited down to the minute” 

your eyes widened a little at his sincerity. he only uses this soft voice when you’re sick or dozing off. 

“of course min, goodnight”

you walked into your room and you felt like your heart was about to beat out of your chest. you packed up all the cards and decorated the box with cute little cat drawings. 

you decided to head to bed for the night, and set your alarm at the same time as minho’s. you didn’t want to miss a single second with him.

you got ready for the day ahead, meeting minho in the kitchen. you got the cocoa powder out from the pantry. “what do you say we have some chocolate cake for breakfast?”

“hopefully you don’t set the kitchen on fire again” 

you thought back to the last time you tried to bake something last time. you got distracted watching tv and couldn’t smell the poor pie burning.

you and minho began to make the batter, some splattering on the counter. while mixing, some of the batter got on your finger, and you couldn’t stop yourself from tasting it. even though it probably isn’t safe to eat raw eggs, a drop can’t hurt right?

you turn to see minho staring at you, laughing. “you just couldn’t resist, huh?”

you turned back to your bowl and continued mixing, and minho couldn’t help but smile. he wondered what it would be like if you could always cook together. 

minho began to work on making the frosting, a light chocolate buttercream. you put the cake in the oven and waited for it to finish while minho brought out the cooling rack and placed it on the counter.

you checked the time. 1:47 PM. you didn’t expect this to take so long, and your stomach was grumbling just about every second.

minho laughed at your groaning. “would you like some pudding?”

“no i’m okay, i’ll just wait for the cake”

minho grabbed a spoon from the drawer and picked up some pudding.

“here, you’re hungry”

all you could do was smile. you wanted minho to enjoy his pudding, but if you were going to be honest, you were really hungry. 

you finally gave in, the vanilla coating your tongue. you hummed in satisfaction. “thank you minho!” 

he couldn’t help but smile at how you sounded like a child. the cake was finally finished after a while, and minho went to go chill the cake while you enjoyed your pudding. 

once the cake was fully baked through, you grabbed the piping bag and started icing the cake. you drew pretty chocolate rosettes around the top. 

minho admired your skill, surprised that you knew how to pipe perfect rosettes. he continued to let you do your thing, and soon the cake was done. 

it was about 2:38 now, and you both were so hungry. you each cut yourself a slice of cake and sat down at the couch. 

“oh my gosh this is amazing, genuinely the best chocolate cake i’ve ever had”

after hearing minho’s reaction you were glad you had looked up so many recipes. 

“thank you”, you replied, mouth still full.

minho loved seeing how happy you were while you were eating. it’s great to appreciate good food.

not too long after, you both finish your cake and put the rest in the fridge. you both sit back down on the couch to watch a movie. you decided to treat minho to a horror movie, since he loved them.

you were a little skeptical about it, since you get scared easily, but figured you should make an exception today, for him. minho didn’t understand why you were being so incredibly caring, but he didn’t mind it.

you started the movie, and the intro was already unsettling. you started to shift in your seat uncomfortably next to minho. you tried not to move too much since you didn’t want to bother. 

the movie started getting more suspenseful. you were practically on edge, trying not to make a noise. all of a sudden you feel something warm under the blanked. you tore your eyes off of the tv to see minho staring at you.

“are you okay? if it’s too scary i can shut it off” 

as much as you wanted to be honest, you couldn’t. “no it’s okay, i don’t mind”

minho’s hand never let go of yours during the duration of the rest of the movie. it was heavily comforting, and you didn’t seem to be as scared anymore.

“i can’t believe you did all this for me y/n. i was really just planning on treating myself to some pudding today.”

“well, im not done just yet”

minho was appalled. “there’s more?!”, he exclaimed. “it’s nothing much, just meet me in your room in five, i have to get it ready.”

minho was curious as to what it could possibly be. he made his way back to his room, while you grabbed the decorated blue box and made sure the notecards were sorted in the right order. 

you make your way to minho’s room, your heart beating loudly. you suddenly felt incredibly nervous, but it’s not like you could change your mind now. 

minho’s eyes drift to the blue box in your hands. “what’s that?”. you sit on the bed next to him and hand him the box. 

“open it”

he removed the lid of the box and his jaw dropped. the notecards. he picked one up, the first line had the date and time. ‘your smile’

‘you have such an amazing smile. i love the way your eyes crinkle and how you smile with your whole being. it warms my heart to be able to see it so often’

he was speechless. he could feel the tears pricking at his eyes. he picked up another card. ‘the mole on your nose’, and then another, ‘your lips’, except this time, the description was complete. 

you were practically beaming at him as he shuffled through the cards. but you didn’t expect him to look back up at you with tears in his eyes. 

i love you so much

your eyes widened.

shit. did he just say that out loud?

“i’m sorry, i didn’t- i didn’t mean to say that out loud”

“you love me…?”, you stared at him in complete shock. you didn’t know what to say. 

fuck. he knew there was no turning back now. “of course i love you. how could i not? you do so much for me y/n. you make me feel like i can be myself. your touch feels like im being lit on fire. my heart feels like it’s going to beat out my chest every time i see you. not to mention you’re absolutely gorgeous and-“

before he could say anything else, you crashed your lips into his. you didn’t know where it was going or what you were going to do, but you knew you wanted to save your first for someone special. you wanted to save it for minho. his arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you onto his lap. the kiss wasn’t really urgent or needy, and instead it was comforting. you loved the feeling of his lips on yours.

you slowly pulled away from him, foreheads touching and breath fanning just under his nose. “you don’t know how long i’ve waited to do that”, your words coming out breathy. 

you can’t get over how beautiful minho looks right now. his hair is a mess due to your hands pulling at it. his lips swollen and pink from the kiss you had just shared. 

“i love you y/n”

you kiss the small mole on his nose and smile at him. 

“i love you more minho”

his entire face lit up at those few words. he let the tears fall freely now, burying his head into your shoulder. “thank you for everything y/n. you’re the best gift i could have ever asked for”

his voice was honest. sincere. soft. you knew he meant it, and you could hear the raw emotion that his words contained. you brought you hand to his face to wipe away a stray tear. 

“i can’t wait to experience so many new exciting things with you.”

he looked back up at you and smiled, picking up the box behind him and setting it on his dresser. there was the familiar look in his eyes again, and you were stupid not to notice it before. he pulls you into bed and wraps you in a hug.

“min? what are you-“ 

“shhh. please, just for a little while”

you smiled at his words, and held him back. you peppered kisses all over his face, listening to his soft whines. you could definitely get used to the feeling of minhos skin on your lips.

slowly, you heard his heavy breathing turn into light snores. you reached over him to turn off the lights, and held him for the rest of the night. you wanted him to sleep peacefully now. he deserved it.

you two would talk about what happened in the morning, but right now this moment was too special to waste.

<3

[writeonwhiskey]

Quick question here, do any of the boys (besides leeknow) know about Chan’s true feelings about y/n? I am enjoying the story sooo much 💗

Lee Know, and maybe even some of the others, might have some assumptions, but Chan has not talked to anyone about his true feelings for y/n. Except y/n, of course. Though she does not know the full extent of it.

You will gain a better understanding of his headspace in ch 23.

I'm happy you're enjoying the story. Hearing that makes me want to cry happy tears, every time.

[daceydeath]

Club 143

Pairing: 0T8 x Reader, Felix x Reader Word Count: 27.1K Genre: Work Romance, slow burn, Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, swearing, male escorts, hosting, alcohol, Explicit Activities

This is my offering of thanks for the 2K of you that have followed me and also kept me going over the past 12 months you guys are amazing and I love the absolute shit out of you all xx

It had been a hard 18 months in every single way, your boyfriend has cheated on you, your job was a never ending cycle of not quite making it and all your friends were either getting married or having babies. Something had to go your way, so this new editorial opportunity had to be the start of it all turning around for you.

You swiped left again, the dating app that your best friend had downloaded for you was full to the brim with fuck boys, dip shits and douche bags none of which interested you long enough to even read the stupid little bio they had written. You had been alone long enough to know you didn't want to waste the little time and effort you could give to someone to be wasted on someone who wouldn't even be able to give you what you wanted let alone what you needed. You had complained to your best friends often enough that one had bought you a vibrator and the other had installed this stupid app telling you to just get back out there and meet people but you were struggling. You didn't want a cheap fuck in an alley behind a club or a guy who couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag let alone find your clitoris taking you home. You wanted to feel good, it wasn't neurosurgery it shouldn't be that hard to find. You had tried dating a few times since your break up with your ex but to begin with it was hard to trust a man again and then you realized you perhaps didn't want to fall straight back into a relationship until it was too late and you had given all the better options the flick.

Sighing you got back to work figuring that it would keep you busy you had been in the news media for a while now and although you weren't a fully qualified journalist, you had never bothered with university, you had made your way up the food chain and were currently working in the health, wellness and well being section of your company. You were sent to cover makeup launches, yoga classes, newest beauty surgical day spas and other garbage but this week you had been given a different assignment. As one of the only women in the team who didn't get embarrassed at the sight of anything too 'exciting' you were being sent to the latest host club for professional women. A week's worth of sitting around trying to not get too drunk while you watched professional, lonely and probably far too wealthy women get flirted with by attractive young men. It had made you a little nervous but you had looked into everything you had been given and you were hoping that it would go smoothly. 

Club 143 was in midtown just across the district border from the wealthiest areas of the city. The home of idols, celebrities and the business elite, it was incredibly well located to cater to their every need and whim. The man who you had spoken to over the phone had seemed quite casual, he had introduced himself as Bang Chan and said he was the owner and operator, he also seemed quite happy to have you come for the week to see how the premises operated and ran. You were going for the following day Wednesday to meet him and see what the club had to offer then you would meet with the various hosts and finally if you wished to he would grant you the full host experience free of charge in exchange for the editorial you would write. Your phone ringing broke you out of organizing what you would need to know for preparation.

"Good evening" you answered, slightly distracted as you saved your research on Mr Bang.

"Have I called at a bad time?" Chan's voice sounded slightly concerned.

"No not at all Mr Bang, I was just preparing for tomorrow" you chirped wanting to sound professional and interested despite being nervous.

"Good, good. I was thinking if it isn't too early we could start at about 11? It will just be me and the bar and waiting staff to begin with so don't feel you need to be dressed up. The boys wouldn't arrive until after 7 anyway so if you need to run home or to the office you have plenty of time" He explained to you gently.

"Oh excellent, that will hopefully give me time to interview you about the first half or so of the editorial on the beginnings and such" you nodded your head even though he couldn't see you.

"I'll see you tomorrow then" He said warmly, his voice having an effect of soothing you each time you heard it.

"See you tomorrow Mr Bang" you hung up feeling a little less worried but still unsure of how this assignment would go.

Arriving at 10:55 you stood looking at the fairly standard looking five story glass building, the only thing making it look slightly different from its surroundings was a total lack of signage except for a small black and sign with elegant gold script reading Club 143 next to the large front doors.

"Good morning Miss" a calm professional voice spoke, making you almost jump "You are here to meet with Mr Bang correct?". 

"Um yes, yes I am, I'm from the editorial team at JYP News" you smiled introducing yourself and following her inside.

"I'm just one of the wait staff Miss, Mr Bang asked us to keep an eye out for you and bring you to his office once you arrived" she explained leading you through the opulent looking bar with its high ceiling and huge chandelier to a door reading staff which she opened for you and gestured for you to enter and take a seat "He won't be long Miss" 

Nodding as she left you alone to wait you looked at the waiting area you had been led to, soft wingback armchairs in warm chocolate tones filled the space, gold accented furniture and a wooden floor seemed excessive for a staff area but you assumed you needed to present the lavish luxury everywhere just in case.

"Miss Kim?" His deep velvety voice asked, making your eyes snap to him "I'm Bang Chan, but please call me Chan" . His warm smile and adorable dimples were a stark contrast from his built physique and generally sexy appearance.

"Hello, if I am going to call you by your first name then please call me by mine" you swallowed hard shaking his hand as you greeted him.

"Good, I prefer to keep things as casual as possible, it can get too pretentious otherwise" He explained cheekily taking you into his office which was far more minimalist than the ostentatious club. "This is my office, we have seen the boys waiting room and you walked through the bar, would you like the tour first or to chat?"

"How about the tour first then we can start the start of the interview process" you smiled politely placing your bag on the floor beside his desk.

"Alright then" he clapped as you followed him back out to the bar to begin "This is the main bar this is where anyone can come to have a drink or enjoy themselves without interruptions, this bar isn't limited to women but we do anticipate that most of the clientele will be female due to the other services we provide"

"So this is not host related at all then just a regular bar?" you asked looking at the beautiful furnishings and row upon row of alcohol bottles that lined the mirrored walls behind the bar.

"Yes the first 2 levels are just a speakeasy come cocktail bar level 3 is where that changes although any available host will be down here in hopes of attracting clients" he waggled his eyebrows at you while he guided you to the large staircase which you climbed after he had offered his arm to you looking over the large cut out that had been made to house the gigantic chandelier.

"It does look beautiful" you murmur your fingers sliding against the fabric of the leather couches as you continue to the far end of the room towards the elevator that stood with its glimmering golden doors set against a black marble wall "Although very opulent".

"Opulence is not your taste then?" Chan queried interested in your opinion as the elevator doors opened and you stepped in together.

"Not to this level, I like a little bit of glitz every now and again but I'm more of a homebody" you felt your face heat up as you spoke not wanting to insult his business before you had even had a proper conversation with him.

"That's fair, I'm not into this lifestyle either, it is excessive" he chuckled. "But the women who are will pay for this experience without a second thought".

"Clever Chan, you know your target audience well" you tried not to smirk as you watched him stuff his hands into the pockets of his black chinos as you traveled up to the next floor through the mirrors all around you.

"This is level 3 and the first level of the host experience, women of all ages can come here and be doted on by male hosts who will drink with them, eat with them and basically fawn over them providing all the attention they desire" Chan continued to explain as your eyes roamed the deep red painted booths that could be hidden behind matching deep red velvet curtains. Before returning to the elevator to go up again into another room full of more private booths that were set further apart to elude more privacy.

"Level 4 is the next level of our host services, so the private bookings or most popular hosts will normally be here. They see people one on one for extended periods of time" Chan continued as you took in another over the top room only this time in deep emerald greens with gold accents.

"Ok so most popular? Does that mean the most requested? So the hosts on the lower level are more of a on demand and availability sort of set up?" You asked making a note in your phone to include the differences when you started writing.

"Yes, the ones that are requested the most or have customers wanting to request them on a regular basis. Yes they will be on this floor" he smiled as you took a few notes and asked things you weren't sure of.

"Is this the last level?" You asked, thinking back to when you had looked into the building as part of your research "I thought this was a five story building" you tilted your head to him.

"You are right there is one more level which I'll give you a tour of only one part since it needs to remain an enigma to out clients" he smirked like a cat who had gotten the cream as you stepped into the lift once again the last floor could only be accessed by key card as Chan swiped his allowing for the floor to be selected.

"Oh, is it really a secret then?" you sassed playfully as the lift climbed to the final floor, the lift opened revealing a single hallway that led to a set of 10 doors the entire hallway painted deep navy blue with only the golden door handles and numbers glinting like stars against the dark walls.

"This is level 5, the premium service, and the most expensive and exclusive part of Club 143" Chan grinned, leading you out of the elevator with his hand resting against your lower back "Pick a door any door and that will be the final part of the tour". You walked down the hallway and stopped before door three looking back at Chan with your eyebrow cocked"

"Door 3 please Chan" you smiled.

"Are you sure you won't get to see inside the others, this is the only one you will see?" He teased walking to the door and swiping his card and opening the handle slowly as you nodded up at him.

"Woah" you muttered as you stepped into what could be a million dollar penthouse, with a lounge area, large bedroom and as you wandered a giant bathroom with a several person bathtub and shower that could fit at least four people.

"Level 5 is the full host experience, you are wined and dined in the comfort of a luxury home and there are no rules except for the ones made between the host and the client" he explained further as you turned back to him, your eyes wide at his obvious implications.

"I'm sorry level 5 is a brothel?" you almost squeaked as Chan doubled over in laughter.

"We provide a full service, but it doesn't have to include sex" Chan continued to chuckle "Some of our hosts are escorts some are not, some of the women who come to this floor will only be here to avoid being recognized on the lower floors some will be willing to part with a lot of money for a night with one of my boys".

"Sorry, that came out quite rudely didn't it?" you apologized flustered "I just wasn't expecting hosts and escorts".

"It's fine" he shrugged, still trying to stop his laughter "Come back downstairs and we can chat about it all in my office and grab some lunch, I've told the kitchens that anything on the menu you order is on the house".

"You don't have to put up with me poking around all week and feed me" you retorted knowing how much this was potentially going to put him out of pocket.

"If you are here and you are working then I should feed you, it's the only way for you to have a fully immersive experience after all" he shrugged as you got out of the lift on the ground floor and followed him back to his office.

You had spoken with Chan about everything you could think of, why he started the club, where the idea had come from and how he selected the hosts you had moved into the waiting room that he had called the boys waiting room setting up your laptop and starting with the opening parts of your editorial as well as typing up your notes of all the things you would need for later a tasting plate of pasta that the chef had prepared for you sat mostly eaten beside the coffee you had asked one of the bar staff for. You felt strange being given anything you asked for so you had tried your hardest to only order a relatively inexpensive dish off the overly expensive menu so as not to appear greedy or that you were taking advantage of Chan's generous hospitality.

"Good afternoon beautiful" a soft pleasant voice interrupted your typing as you looked up slightly confused as two handsome men had walked into the waiting room.

"He means you sweetheart" the other smiled, his pretty smile and easy manner distracting from his hulkingly muscular frame.

"Hello" you answered quietly as Chan emerged from his office. 

"Minho, Changbin you're early and you have met our resident reporter I see" he rolled his eyes at them both.

"Resident reporter?" The taller one quirked his head furrowing his brows.

"Remember the editorial that is being written about our first week to help boost the popularity of the place Minho?" Chan sighed slightly exasperated.

"Oh yeah shit that's right" he smirked "Sorry" he turned to you again looking smug rather than sorry as you blinked again and went back to your article taking a sip of coffee.

"Get in the office will you we have stuff to talk about" Chan groaned as the other two plodded into the office after him and you took that as your cue to finish up and go home to change for the evening so that you at least looked the part of someone who should be in attendance at a fancy arsed party. You had borrowed a few dresses from a colleague that you had spoken to about the assignment, she had suggested you stick to darker and more modest dresses that would help you blend into the background so that you didn't draw unwanted attention. Needless to say the black square necked mid length dress made you feel like no one would notice you compared to the socialites that were expected to be in attendance.

When you returned to Club 143 the doorman ushered you straight in and you were met by a well dressed man who welcomed you and took you back to the waiting room you had been in for half of your day.

"Mr Bang, your guest has returned" he knocked and ushered you in leaving you quite surprised at the room now full of preposterously handsome men.

"Um hello, guests aren't meant to be back here sweetheart" One of them smiled his eyes friendly as he moved to take you into the still empty bar.

"There you are! you disappeared I wondered which one of the boys had stolen you away" Chan teased.

"Well I didn't think I would fit in that well in a work suit so sorry about that" you sassed straight back feeling distinctly more comfortable after floating around him for so long during the course of the day.

"Miss reporter you came back" one of the guys from earlier grinned.

"Reporter?" A very young looking man asked, his fine facial features making him look distinctly fox like.

"This is the reporter who will be doing the editorial on the club to, hopefully, increase our business. She's here for the whole week so be nice to her. She isn't a client so don't treat her like one" Chan announced.

"This is Minho and Changbin who you saw earlier today" he gestured to the two guys furthest away, "this is Han, Hyunjin, Seungmin and Felix". You followed Chan hand as he introduced each one, smiling until you met his eyes. He was so beautiful he almost took your breath away but you tore your eyes back to look at Chan as he introduced you to them.

"I figured tonight you can wander at will observing whatever interests you and then tomorrow you can talk to the guys about whatever you need for the article" he continued.

"Sure that sounds good, give me a chance to see the rest of the staff in action as well" you smiled politely hoping to seem professional.

"We do have more hosts obviously, but they are either getting changed or not here yet" he added, looking at you as you quirked your eyebrow at him.

"How many are there in total?" you tilted your head pulling your phone from your tiny purse to take more notes.

"There are thirty hosts in total and these seven are the ones I expect to be the... most popular ones" Chan smirked.

"Oh the host for upstairs, the hosts that are actually escorts but you're calling them hosts, those hosts? Right" you rolled your eyes sounding sarcastic as you entered a few short notes looking back up at him to see a shit eating grin on his face.

"You catch on quick" he winked.

"You are an impossible flirt Mr Bang" you pursed your lips to cover your chuckle.

"Hey what did I say about the Mr Bang thing?" he almost yelped.

"Not to use it" you met his eyes cheekily "So naturally that will be what I call you". 

Your eyes flicked back across the others, taking in the amused expressions before you put on your best professional face and turned back to the door, opening it and walking though to cut off whatever comeback he was preparing for you.

"If you need me Mr Bang I'll be at the bar, need to review your bar staff too you know" you called as you walked towards the large bar where three barmen were waiting.

Once the music started and the doors opened to the many beautiful and well dressed women who wanted to see what a building full of ridiculously handsome men could offer them. You watched as each of the impeccably dressed hosts were either assigned or accosted by the women filling the bar you watched on seeing socialites you recognized, CEO’'s and directors of well known businesses and politicians wives all ogling the men you had met earlier and the many that you hadn't as they flitted through the crowd with ease. Chan was busy entertaining a group of women who all had glasses of champagne in their hands, Minho seemed to be captivating his audience of four young women who had bee lined for him and an a tall man you hadn't met was keeping another group of women enthralled by some story he was weaving for them.

"All alone tonight Miss R?" A sexily deep voice asked from you left making you jump slightly as you turned to face him as he slipped the stem of a glass of champagne between your fingers.

"Oh no I'm just observing tonight" you answered slightly flustered by how smooth his actions had been until you actually looked at him, tall, blond and handsome in an expensive tailored looking suit.

"I'm Felix" he smiled dazzlingly, taking in what must have been a slightly shocked expression on your face "We met before but there were a lot of names for you to remember".

"Yes, yes we did" you smiled back feeling helpless to do anything else as his golden flecked brown eyes skimmed over your face "How is the night going so far for you?".

"I would say excellent but then I saw you alone and I thought you might want a little company for just a little while" His voice was like honey and you instantly realized that this must be why Chan knew he would be so popular with his clientele.

"That would be lovely Felix, but aren't you meant to be working?" you sipped the champagne to cover the flush that was creeping up your neck as he moved a few strands of your hair behind your eyes.

"I am working" he teased "I am working on giving you a good view of how this works although this is more enjoyable to me than politicians wives or silly socialites".

"I can't tell if you are actually telling me the truth or that you are a professional when it comes to flirting" you admitted almost too quietly to hear over the music and noise.

"Truth not flirting" he smiled crookedly "Flirting is hardly going to work on you since you know what happens here".

"Well thank you for the honesty" you conceded while taking another sip of the wine.

"It's not entirely selfless but it thought I could show you around a bit let you see how upstairs is looking" he suggested offering you his arm like a gentleman "after all showing you around does give me at least something enjoyable to do that also gets me away from some of the women old enough to be my mother" he joked.

"I would really like that, it seems less like spying if I am next to you" you grinned taking the offered arm before Felix escorted you to the elevator, you noticed the looks some of the women threw at you and started to fell a little self conscious of the sheer lack of wealth and importance you looked as you passed them.

"Ignore them" Felix whispered, placing his other hand on top of the one you were holding his arm with. "They are just jealous of how beautiful you look tonight compared to them".

"I agree that they are jealous but it's not for how I look it's because I'm with you Felix" you whispered back making him smile genuinely at you. "So level 3 then?"

"We can start there and see where it takes us" Felix smirked naughtily as though he was intentionally breaking a rule, gently guiding you into the elevator along with another host you hadn't seen before who had a giggly young woman clutching his arm Felix tiled his body to hide you from the other woman his warm chest brushing against your arm.

Stepping from the lift the hosted area looked almost as full as the bar downstairs, each of the booths were either occupied or had velvet ropes preventing the area being used until a host was available to fill it. Felix took your hand from his arm and instead guided you with his arm delicately draped around your waist, your skin heating up where he made contact with your dress. He helped you onto one of the bar stools slipping onto his own beside you and catching the attention of one of the bartenders.

"What is your drink of choice?" he asked casually, still looking toward the bartender.

"Oh I'm working, I shouldn't be drinking" you replied softly.

"Well how about a non alcoholic drink?" he shot you a seductive smirk as you blinked at him.

"Um" you thought for a moment.

"Can I get two specialty martinis please" Felix ordered before turning back to you and winking "if you say specialty at any of these bars they will serve you a non alcoholic drink that looks like one so no one is the wiser".

"Any other tips you can share with me?" you smiled gracefully as the bartender placed the two drinks in front of you making Felix lean into your ear as though he was spilling secrets.

"Don't take Chan as just the owner, he is one of us too" he whispered "and to be honest half the escort boys you met would have knocked me out if they knew I was going to monopolize your attention for so long". His breath grazed your neck as he spoke, making you shiver hoping that he wouldn't notice the effect he was having on you and the struggle to remain as professional as possible that you were currently battling inside your head.

"How often this week do you think you will be on this floor then Felix?" you whispered back hoping to keep the purely professional status between you since your mind was screaming at you that he was too good to be true.

"This is probably going to be the only time to be honest with you" he moved to tuck your hair behind your ear once again, before taking your elbow to guide you back across to the elevator "I have a feeling I will be booked fairly solidly from here on out, shall we see the next floor?"

Stepping into the elevator again Felix draped his arm once again around your waist pulling you closer to his side, completely distracting you from the doors closing or opening again, before leading you from the elevator to a private booth at the far end of the room and sliding you in and following in after you.

"So tell me, why did you take this assignment?" he tilted his head looking only into your eyes as he spoke, capturing you entirely from what you had been planning on observing around the room.

"Truthfully, I was hoping I could make a good impression on my bosses and get more interesting work" you admitted "I'm a little tired of the ten ways to look younger, or how to land a wealthy boyfriend articles I usually get".

"Hmm, I can understand that" he sipped his drink casually. "You don't seem the type to work in the whole lifestyle media world to be honest with you, you seem more serious".

"I wouldn't have taken you for an escort either, a rich boy maybe or even a host but still here we are" you fired back teasingly.

"Well right now I'm not any of those things" he smirked, eyes twinkling in the low mood lighting of the room.

"Oh I'm pretty sure you're still a rich boy, judging by how tailored that designer suit is" you giggled playfully, enjoying how he was making you feel much more comfortable than you had anticipated.

"Fair I am still that, but I'm not treating you like I would if you were one of my guests, I thought you might get a bit sick of me if it was all just smoke and mirrors" The honesty of his words made you feel somewhat pleased that you were seeing a more realistic version of Felix even if it wasn't the same as if you had met him anywhere else on any other day.

"Right this is where you're hiding huh?" Chan's voice floated over you both bursting the bubble that you were currently in.

"I'm just showing Miss R what a host experience would entail Chan" Felix grinned cheekily.

"Well you have a booking so off you trot I'll find someone else to entertain our fly on the wall guest" Chan chuckled as Felix got out of the booth missing the look he shot you before he left to find his guest, he looked almost a little disappointed to be leaving you which made butterflies burst out in your stomach.

"Would you like me to find someone to look after you?" Chan's voice had you turning back to him blinking.

"Oh no, it's opening night, you need them for your guests, I'll just wander and keep to myself if that is easier" you said hurriedly not wanting to cause him any issues.

"That's fine too. I have a keycard for you so you can go to any of the floors you want, except the top, don't want you walking into something you shouldn't" he winked sneakily pressing the card into your hand before heading back to your assumed work.

You slipped from the booth taking the final sip of your drink and heading towards the elevator deciding that you should probably make your way back down to the bar to observe the party and not just spend the rest of the evening hoping to catch a glimpse of Felix again. Stepping into the party atmosphere of the upper bar you walked towards the bar slipping around groups of women and wait staff who looked like they had been training for how busy it was going to be for weeks in advance. Different handsome men caught your attention as you looked about, all were almost unbelievably attractive but no two looked that much alike they all had their own uniqueness which you suppose was how they made their money catering to the exact fantasy of the guest they were entertaining. As you made your way closer to the bar you were intercepted by a man you hadn't met before.

"Good evening, beautiful, what brings you here alone?" His smooth voice washed over you "May I keep you company?".

"Hello and of course you can but you will be wasting your time on me" you apologized quickly.

"I would very much doubt that" you smiled softly, his pretty eyes and angelic face making you feel a little flustered "I'm Yunho" he introduced himself taking your hand to press a chaste kiss to your knuckles.

"Pleasure to meet you Yunho" you stammered as he guided you to a seat at the bar "I'm the reporter that is writing the editorial on the place".

"Oh you're Miss R!" his eyes lit up as he waved down one of the staff at the bar "Some of the others were talking about you, said you were very pretty and had been swept off her feet by Felix. I'll admit I'm pleased that only one of those is true".

"I can tell you're a host but what kind of host are you?" you licked your lips trying to keep your composure at his flirting.

"Ah Chan already mentioned there are differences, no wonder he's hopeless with telling too much to pretty girls" he laughed "But I am just a host, I'm not in the same league as Felix, Chan or Hyunjin".

"Now you know I'm not a paying guest, do you still want to sit here with me?" you questioned not just because you wanted to ask him everything you could think of about his job but also because you didn't want to make him feel obligated if there was money to be made elsewhere.

"I would rather talk with you about whatever you wish to know than pretend to be interested in empty headed socialites" he whispered coyly his lips coming closer to your ear "Although maybe we should move to our own little corner rather than the bar?"

"What did you have in mind, Yunho? you're the one with experience here" you whispered back conspiratorially a small smile tugged on the corners of his lips.

"Follow me Miss R, I'll show you all the ins and outs" you waggled his eyebrows playfully at you before picking up two tall glasses that looked like gin and tonics. Yunho nestled you right into the front corner of the upper level which gave you access to watch the whole floor and a good section of the lower floor placing your glass in front of you he sat closely beside you.

"What drew you to this job?" you quipped as soon as he was seated.

"Well I fell into it actually, I met a few of the other guys Yeosang, Wooyong and Mingi they said I should give it a go. I already knew I had pretty good looks so why not use them to make some money right?" He explained animatedly "So after I worked at a few different host places where I was just part time I met Chan, he had given the others a job and he gave me one too".

"That is such a random set of circumstances" you laughed.

"Well the other three work here with me, we’re here 5 nights a week and make more then we would working a normal job with way less hours" he shrugged easily his smile infectious as he looked at you softly "I meet interesting people, I get paid to flirt and be charming it is the easiest job in the world the only downside is that I haven't told my family and getting a girlfriend is hard" you nodded empathizing with him, you hadn't thought about it but you would probably have to leave all last names out of the article to make sure that a level on anonymity was maintained. You couldn't out people for their jobs to their family after all that was unethical.

"So the hours are good and the job isn't too hard? Sounds like a dream really" you said wistfully thinking of how much over time you were going to need to work to type up the part of the article to do with the opening.

"It's not all roses, some of the people we have to entertain treat us like shit, we are paid to give them attention, flatter them, make them feel special but they treat us like we are nothing more than an object half the time. Or worse we get some who not only eat up every word we say but believe it so they become obsessed and come in all the time." he continued shrugging as though it was normal to have admirers fighting for your attention.

"What happens in the case of them becoming obsessed?" you asked genuinely concerned.

"Well as long as they can afford to pay for our time then we keep seeing them, you do feel bad for them they think we are in love with them and we are actually saying the same to the next woman we see. Once they can't afford our time they can come in the building anymore" his answers were still far too casual for what he was talking about in your opinion.

"They are just barred?" you almost splutter.

"Well not barred permanently they can come back when they can afford to but that is why Chan decided to make a much more elite version of the standard club. The more money you have the more you can spend but the more likely you will draw a scandal if you become too invested in any one host" he clarified not looking at you directly but leaning in to you as he spoke so he could keep his voice quiet. He seemed to be watching the room far closer than you which made you sit back from him and continue to scan the crowd and how smoothly things were coming together.

You couldn't help notice the moment Chan walked back into your eye line speaking to another quite tall and attractive man who he sent toward a man who had been standing at the bottom of the stairs monitoring the room the whole time you had been in a place you could see him. You hadn't been introduced but you assumed he was the majordomo in Chan's stead while they were all working, he seemed to direct just about every host that was on the lower floors and he sent this tall handsome one up the stairs towards you.

"Good evening Miss R" he smiled almost sinfully "I'm San and I deeply apologize but I need to steal Yunho here away".

"Oh of course, I don't want to interrupt your work" your eyes widened slightly thinking you had gotten Yunho in trouble "I didn't mean to take so much of his time".

"Don't worry Miss R" Yunho grinned roguishly "I think someone else wants to monopolize your time" he stood following San across the floor to a group of women who were probably in the later part of their thirties to make a good impression and hopefully some business.

"You seem to be enjoying yourself," Chan noted, offering you his hand so you could stand.

"This is a lovely bar regardless of the other things you have going on here" you conceded watching him look proud from a moment.

"Would you like to have a little more in depth look around?" He offered chuckling at how you seemed to be taking in as many details as possible.  

"How much more in depth?" you tilted your head at him for a moment making him chuckle before he led you to the elevator. 

"Were going up to the level 4 I have a space that I haven't been able to fill that I think you might be perfect for" Chan almost purred as he spoke to you making your body react in a way you hadn't expected, you shivered and your breathing increased at the prospect of what he meant.

"I'm confused Chan" you said slowly as he gently guided you towards a booth that was unoccupied.

"Well the fourth floor has a booth that hasn't been filled and a host that hasn't been assigned so I was hoping you would do me a favor and fill that gap for the time being" he revealed helping you on to the plush velvet couch that made up the majority of the space. Most of the curtains around you were drawn partially or completely, you could see the occasional glimpse of the host that was working but not the guest. The booth to your right hand side Changbin lounging legs half spread as he lent toward whoever he was entertaining to your left you saw a flash of blonde hair and a tailored suit and knew instantly it was Felix.

"I can do that for you, it would be my pleasure" you bit your bottom lip a little to cover the nerves you were feeling but you did feel like you owed Chan to help him if he needed a favor in return for the unlimited access he was giving you.

"Excellent, I will let him know you are here" He grinned walking behind you to the bar. You didn't want to get caught looking around too much but you couldn't help your curiosity, looking at the other booths you could see occasional comings and goings of the wait staff bringing drinks or bottles of wine but nothing too interesting until you sat further into the cushions and looked to your left noticing Felix's looking at you with a almost annoyed expression but his eyes darted away quickly.

"Hello, we met earlier" a slightly husky voice took your attention away from Felix and to yet another handsome man, this one tall and lean with beautiful features and the prettiest lips you thought you had ever seen on anyone ever. "I'm Hyunjin".

"Hello Hyunjin, I do remember" you swallowed feeling shy to be under such an intense gaze, he moved to draw the curtains across both the left and right of you to keep you from any other person's gaze but not before snorting softly as he pulled the left side across. Sitting beside you he pushed a small button on the coffee table in front of you and made himself comfortable.

"I realize this might be slightly strange for you but I will try to make this as genuine as I can without too much theatrics" He chuckled honestly making you feel a little more at ease.

"How is it that a host such as yourself is not fully booked?" you asked tentatively not wanting to start off on the wrong foot.

"Well my guest was unable to choose between myself and another host so she flipped a coin and I was suddenly no longer booked" he smirked as you furrowed your brow at him. "We will see guests in pairs or sometimes even groups but if they want a more one-on-one experience we usually prefer to work solo, unless of course the price is right".

"One on one? you don't, mean down here do you?" you asked, picking up and sipping the glass of wine that had appeared on the table for you brought by a very discrete member of the staff.

"Perceptive of you" he chuckled and smiled fondly at you "Yes one on one upstairs".

"Well you guys have to pay your rent too" you shrugged looking up at him "So what is a night with a host actually like? Is it all flirting and playing a role for you?"

"Its both those things but much more, I won't bother with the smoke and mirrors Felix said you can see through that, but we make conversation, give you our full attention, give you the opportunity to unwind with a man you might not normally get to spend time with" Hyunjin clarified "We are paid to feign interest but I won't need to do that either because you Miss R are quite interesting already".

"Why have all of you started calling me that?" you almost giggle watching his eyes crinkle with amusement.

"Well you are a reporter, and we are not going to call you by your name in case someone recognizes you, you get the anonymity that the rest of us hosts do while you're here. But if you come back after we will all definitely use your name" Hyunjin teasingly laughed making you smile as his eyes turned into perfect little moons making him look younger.

"How did you fall into this life Hyunjin? Was it just that you are incredibly attractive?" you continued to smile as he looked almost surprised at the confidence with which you spoke as you swirled your drink.

"Incredibly attractive huh?" Hyunjin smirked, recovering quickly. "Probably the same way as the others you have spoken to did, I was in art school and pretty broke. I was thinking I could do life modeling for extra money but that isn't the best paid job. I overheard a classmate say she had gone to a host club with her friend and they weren't even as pretty as me and I thought I can do that so I did" he shrugged casually readjusting his position on the couch so he was closer to you.

"That is actually not too different from what Yunho told me" you agreed, finishing the glass of wine.

"Yunho? First you run off with Felix then Yunho, you are popular" Hyunjin joked moving to pour more wine into your glass.

"That's not what happened!" You almost squeaked "Felix showed me around and Yunho just sat with me for a little while at the bar in between his bookings". Hyunjin threw his head back laughing at your defense while you still looked scandalized.

"I was just teasing you Miss Reporter" he admitted smiling wide, his overly sexy demeanor dropping to show you a glimpse of the more everyday version of him as you continued to sip to hide your nerves and keep yourself grounded.

"I think I might have gotten Felix in trouble though" you admitted sheepishly "Chan didn't look too pleased I was taking up his time".

"Oh he wasn't displeased or even annoyed" Hyunjin interrupted you swiftly "Chan was thrilled Felix took an interest in you actually, it gave him the potential of a very favorable editorial and also Felix doesn't really have an interest in anyone who isn't part of our little circle".

"What do you mean by that, the not showing interest part?" you quizzed quickly feeling more forthright as the alcohol buzzed through your system.

"Felix is incredibly professional, he doesn't see women outside of the job, we were worried he was gay for a while and that we had been using him to attract the wrong clients. But he just doesn't take any interest because he doesn't want to get hurt, he knows nearly all women would not want to be with a man who make his money fucking other women" Hyunjin stated bluntly.

"Oh that's awful. Do you all feel like that?" You probed gently feeling sad for Felix and mad at yourself for not noticing that he was perhaps not happy.

"We all love our job, we are well paid, we get to spend time with beautiful women and we can work when we want. But it can be lonely in our world" his smile was wistful as he looked at you moving to tuck you hair behind your ear slowly pulling his hand away from you.

"Still, that sounds like it makes things harder for you" you sighed, meeting his eyes.

"Kind of you to say but we will only have this job for so long, then we will have the rest of our lives to find someone" Hyunjin leaned a little closer again but you didn't mind closer was good for sharing information that otherwise wouldn't be divulged.

"Still you're all so young to just give up on the idea that someone out there won't care for you regardless" you chastised playfully "You only have your youth once Hyunjin".

"Well consider me a changed man then" he giggled, taking your hand in his tracing his fingers in small circles across your wrist. "What about you then? Surely your boyfriend would have hated the idea of you spending a week here, job or not".

"I am very single so that was not an issue" you grinned starting to feel a little more than buzzed from the wine.

"I find it hard to believe someone as gorgeous as you is single" he smirked, his fingers still tracing patterns on your bare wrist and forearm.

"Funny Hyunjin" you rolled your eyes. "I have actually been single for a while, I don't seem to attract the right men".

"Again that seems unlikely but if you say so" he teased, topping your glass up again.

"I understand how you are so popular as a host now though" you smirked while you enjoyed his flirting and gentle touches you knew they weren't real.

"I'll let you in on a little secret then shall I?" Hyunjin whispered in a low voice sliding across the velvet surface until he was touching your thigh with his and his words could be breathed directly into your ear.

"Sure Hyunjin, tell me and see if I believe you" you whispered back sounding more confident than you were.

"Everything I have said has been true and I would very much like to take you upstairs" he whispered again pressing his lips to your earlobe.

"I'm sorry?" you spluttered, completely flustered by his words and the feeling of his lips on your skin.

"I. would. like. to. take. you. upstairs" he repeated slowly enunciating each word.

"I, um, why would you want that?" you stuttered feeling heat burning under your skin

"I think I could show you exactly how you should be treated, I think you would enjoy it and I very much would" he continued slipping his arm around your shoulders to hold you closer against him, the hand on your wrist now cupping your face.

"I don't think you mean that Hyunjin" you whispered breathily, your wide eyes trained on him.

"I think you will find that I do" he smiled sultrily before closing the space between you and softly pressing his lips to yours. It had been so long since you had been kissed you almost melted into him as his plump lips slid against yours but instead you pulled away slightly and Hyunjin dropped his hand from your face as he moved to press his forehead against yours.

"Hyunjin" you breathed your breath no doubt caressing his lips given how close he still was "You can't, we can't, I can't".  

"Because of your editorial or because you don't want to?" he smiled softly, not moving away from you.

"The editorial is most of it" you admitted trying to get your heart rate to calm "but I also don't want to be tipsy if I was to go upstairs with you or anyone else".

"You are very honest Miss R, which is almost fatally attractive" he whispered fondly, moving himself slightly further back from you to give you a little more room.

"I try to be" you blinked, still feeling a little dazed.

"How about we call this a night, I will make sure you get a driver to take you home and make sure you are safe" Hyunjin smiled ruefully.

"I am sorry Hyunjin, I don't mean it harshly I just don't want to be clouded by alcohol" you bit your lip feeling like you had hurt him.

"I'm not hurt by your decision Miss R, I respect that you wish to be sober that is not a flaw" He explained intertwining his fingers with yours "now let me make sure you get home safely"

"Thank you Hyunjin" you agreed following letting his lead you to the elevators but not before looking to see if you could catch another glimpse of Felix, the booth he had been in was empty now curtains pulled back and the table sparkling clean again making you feel something you couldn't identify as you looked around noticing the others were all still occupied and that the elevator was not coming down not up towards your floor.

"If you're looking for him he is on level 5 by now" Hyunjin whispered in your ear making your stomach drop slightly.

"Oh no I am just wondering what happens when the table becomes empty does Chan replace it with just regular hosts?" you tried to cover your obvious want to see Felix again.

"I don't actually know, you see all of the guests in here, beside you, will end up on level 5 with their host so what happens after we go upstairs isn't something I've ever bothered looking at" Hyunjin shrugged mischievously as he stepped into the elevator with you making your way down to the ground floor but instead of leaving through the main entrance he sneakily took you through the the staff door. 

"Hyunjin, where on earth are you taking me?" you chuckled, confusion lacing your voice as you noticed some of the other hosts you hadn't seen before looking at you surprised.

"I told you Miss R, I'm making sure you get home safely, we have drivers, I will send you home with one to make sure that happens" he shook his head at you sitting you in one of the chairs as he ventured through a door that led further into the building.

Hyunjin had put you in a black luxury sedan that drove you home and made sure you had entered your building before leaving to return to Club 143. Your head was full of too many thoughts and the fog of alcohol to actually bother writing anything down for the editorial you simply got into the shower, washed your face and climbed into bed hoping the morning light would bring clarity not just embarrassment for your behavior. Felix had flirted with you and had shown some sort of interest in you, but he looked annoyed at you later on, Hyunjin had kissed you and asked you to go to bed with him and Yunho had divulged some more sinister aspects of the job. The following part of the week was going to be intense, you could feel it but that was fine you would be able to handle it.

You were happily surprised that you had no headache or hangover when you woke up although you didn't think you had drunk enough to get hung over. It was much more of a little too tipsy, not full on drunk. You knew as you got dressed you would have to transfer your notes from the cloud to your laptop so that you could start the editorial about how beautiful a location it was and how fantastic the food, drinks and staff were, you could also start adding the sections that you needed to write about Chan as the owner/operator but you would need to speak to him about what he would and would not like to have added about his on host activities. It had been almost two in the morning by the time you got home so you knew that there was no way you could turn up before lunch, the staff would need time to recover all though surely there were dozens and dozens of them in order to be open everyday.

Concentrating you spent the first few hours of your morning writing and editing your drafts before ordering flowers for your colleague who had lent you the dress for the previous night. You would probably need to shop or at least rent something for the other nights rather than just wear her clothes the whole assignment. Besides, something inside you was telling you that looking a little bit more interesting than you did last night wouldn't be a bad thing, at least for the first weekend they were open. You were expecting to see more interesting things over the Friday to Sunday nights, more normal to the host world and less of a large opening gala type thing. Chan had previously stated that you were welcome to bring clothes with you to change into and anything else you might need for you to change into, to save you time and no doubt also to give him more time to sleep off the night before so shopping before you left for Club 143 should be easy for you.

Stepping into the large department store was something fairly foreign for you, you stuck to smaller and cheaper stores generally since you couldn't afford this level of expense everyday. The sales assistants were all impeccably dressed in black chic uniforms flitting between customers and looking far more put together than you ever did, for the most part they ignored you which gave you time to think about the level of investment these few dresses would be.

"Good morning Miss R" a deep honeyed voice spoke softly to you as you ran your fingers across the fabric of a beautiful dress that was way too expensive for you even to pretend to look at, making you look up slightly startled.

"Good Morning Felix" you smiled shyly looking up at him "I didn't think you would be out and about so early considering how busy you were when I last saw you".

"I needed to pick up my suits for the weekend" he explained his smile warming you "Although from what I was told you spent your time all over the party last night, even Hyunjin was lucky enough to spend time with you".

"True, not my doing though I was asked for a favor from Chris which was to fill the booth Hyunjin was working" you shrugged "He seems nice if not a little forward".

"Forward? Sounds about right" Felix laughed, the deep smooth sound attracting the attention of the attendants in the area "Did you have fun? Is that why you are shopping for new clothes?"

"I am but I have strayed off course I could never wear designers like these" you admitted as his brow crinkled slightly.

"That doesn't mean you shouldn't try them on, these clothes are only beautiful on someone not hanging on a rack" he smiled again dazzling you into nodding slightly.

"Excuse me miss? my girlfriend is looking for a few new outfits, could you assist?" Felix turned to the assistant waiting a few racks away smiling at her politely.

"Oh course sir" she nodded, batting her eyelashes at him as she made her way between the clothes  to you "What size would fit you, Miss?" she smiled.

"Oh I'm not sure" you bit your lip looking at the dress in front of you.

"I would suggest a medium sweetheart" Felix almost purred as the assistant nodded in agreement and found several items in your size ushering you and Felix towards the dressing room area.

"Felix" you quietly hissed, "I shouldn't be wasting her time like this and who said anything about girlfriends" knowing he heard you as he silently shook with laughter.

"It's not wasting her time if she had nothing to do anyway" he whispered back taking a seat on the large lounge suite that sat next to the full length mirrors as you were ushered behind gold colored curtains to change into the dress you had originally been looking at a black lace square necked dress that was lined with a skin toned underlay. You knew you were not going to buy any of these but Felix waiting for you to show him how you looked in it spurred you on. Getting yourself into the dress was easier said than done. The zip was small and awkward and you needed to wiggle yourself around but when you got there clearing your throat you popped your head around the curtain to see Felix smirking waiting for you.

"Well come out sweetheart let me see how it looks" he teased, somehow seeming to know he was flustering you again, taking a deep breath as you stepped out from behind the curtain.

"How does it look?" you asked softly your hands, smoothing the fabric nervously.

"Well you do look beautiful in it, but I think you would look gorgeous in something a little shorter or maybe tighter?" Felix mused tapping his chin as the assistant returned to agree with him as he sent her to find exactly that.

"Felix, didn't you have suits to collect?" you mumble as you were now left alone again.

"Yeah but this is much more fun" his eyes lit up as you looked at yourself wistfully "besides you will spend the whole night watching women who aren't as pretty as you get attention for men who would be rather talking to you as you take notes for an editorial that might change your career, live a little".

"You are a terrible influence on me" you laughed disappearing behind the curtain to get the zipper back down as the girl returned with a rack of things for you to try.

"I have several different styles and a mix of black and color so you can find exactly what you think would be right" she chirped, sliding behind the curtain to show you the rack which was filled with ridiculously expensive and gorgeous dresses. Leaving you to change she left the room allowing you to slip into a black mini dress with hot pink lining, the pink was going to be visible every time you took a step but you liked it, you were just nervous that Felix might not, which logically made no sense to you as you were not buying any of these dresses and you weren't trying to impress Felix, but you still took a deep breath before stepping out.

"Now that one looks amazing" Felix whistled playfully looking you up and down.

"You don't need to pretend she isn't here anymore" you sassed rolling your eyes.

"I'm not lying, you look incredible Miss R" he sighed, his eyes finding yours and looking almost innocent "try the others" he encouraged. After trying on every single dress your favorite was the black and pink satin mini, a black long sleeved mini that was studded with crystals and a one shoulder red and black mini. Felix had said that he liked all of them but those three got the best reactions from him.

"What were your favorites?" He asked sweetly as you reemerged in your own clothes.

"The black and pink and the black with crystals" you smiled as he gestured towards the door.

"They were my favorites too" he whispered temptingly in your ear.

"Shame that is the only time I'll get to wear something like that" you sighed as the assistant returned to the shop floor with the rack.

"Did you want to get a coffee with me Miss R? I have another 45 minutes before my suits will be ready.

"I would like that" you stuttered, heat rushing up your throat and into your cheeks.

Sitting with Felix in the open was very different than sitting with Felix in a Club 143, firstly the looks and stares he attracted were constant and second he was much less of a smooth operator when he wasn't on the clock. Ordering you both coffee, at his insistence, and coming back with cake was somehow unsurprising even though you barely knew him, you still thanked him and took the chocolate cake with a happy smile making him almost grin at your reaction.

"You look like you like sweet things" he spoke softly as he sat opposite you at the little table in the back of the cafe.

"I do like sweet things, guess you busted me" you chuckled taking your first bite and just about moaning at how good it tasted.

"I'll let you in on a secret" he winked exaggeratedly "me too".

"So is this your life when you aren't hosting?" you asked genuinely as your coffee was being brought over to you.

"Sort of, I do all the normal things during the hours most people work and often a bunch of us hang out or work out together" he shrugged while sipping his coffee.

"So just the reverse of everyone else" you nodded "That must make meeting people hard".

"It would be if I actually wanted to, but I don't think a lot of women are that understanding of my job" he replied easily like it wasn't a big deal.

"Yeah I get that I guess a lot of women wouldn't see that it's all just smoke and mirrors, it's an experience that you tailor to your customers needs it isn't real". You conceded sipping your drink and not noticing the look Felix was giving you as you continued eating.

"You said you were single too though, didn't you?" Felix recovered quickly "Is that because of your job or because you aren't looking?".

"Bit of both really, my job means I have to be flexible to go to any event I get sent to regardless of what else I had planned" you smiled "guys often don't like it if they aren't your main priority".

"That's shitty of them then" Felix scoffed, making you laugh, it was so easy talking to him he was much more relaxed even though he still looked like he should be on a runway with his perfectly tousled hair and designer look.

"I think your suits would be ready by now, it's been an hour Felix" you said finishing your coffee "I shouldn't take up anymore of your free time since you don't have that much of it".

"Nah, you can take up as much as you like but you still have dress shopping to finish, so will I see you tonight then?" He agreed, offering you his hand to help you to stand.

"Of course I will be in tonight and each night this week" you smiled as he walked you back towards the place you needed to be "See you tonight Felix" you waved before walking towards the escalator to find clothes you could actually afford to buy.

The rest of the day had been dull you had bought a tighter than normal floor length emerald green dress and a black mini dress in a satin fabric that reminded you of the mini that Felix had said he liked so buy the time you were packed up and ready to head to Club 143 to start your evening you weren't feeling nervous about having to meet so many different hosts to get a feel for how they liked working for Chan or how they became hosts in the first place because it felt like, in Felix, you had at least a friend on your side hoping for you to succeed. You had not bothered to dress in your work suit since you would be changing into more appropriate club attire before the night actually started so when you arrived in jeans and a sweater you were not expecting the almost same response as you had gotten the night before when you were far more dressed up.

"Looking good Miss R" Yunho called as you walked through the staff door with a large bag in tow.

"Hello Yunho, did you have an eventful night?" you called back knocking on Chan's door before wandering in when you got no answer and depositing your things in the corner he had said you could use.

"Yeah the only fun part was talking to you" he told you with a slightly flirtatious tinge in his voice.

"I'm sure" you chuckled as Chan appeared through the staff door from the bar.

"Ah good you're back, I was hoping last night didn't frighten you off" he teased dimples flashing as his own joke.

"Hyunjin tried his hardest but he couldn't chase me off. Sorry" you shrugged.

"Ooh immune to Hyunjin, you will be hard to win over" he scratched his chin in jest "but you met some of my hosts last night and tonight you will probably get to meet a few more but I have found a handful you haven't met yet if you wanted to talk to them about this place".

"That would be brilliant Chan, thank you" You smiled genuinely.

"I figured you can speak to our regular hosts as they float around before they start and if you wanted to join me for dinner I thought you might want to speak to Seungmin and Changbin" Chan continued please with your reactions.

"That sounds perfect. Who are the hosts for me to catch before they start?" you asked, remembering that Chan said he had thirty odd hosts who worked for him.

"I have asked San and Hongjoong to hang out with you on and off while everyone gets ready" he explained "I assume since there are bags in my office you will be getting ready here?"

"Yeah I figured I can get ready after the night has started so I don't take up too much space" you smiled.

"So like yesterday, make yourself at home and use whatever you need. I'm thinking of a slightly early dinner so I will come grab you if you like for that" Chan continued watching you closely.

"Oh that would be great if it isn't too much trouble for you I might get lost in what I'm writing otherwise" you agreed easily.

"Well I will leave you to your work then I'll send whichever of the boys is free and ready first your way" he grinned as you went to sit at one of the tables that littered the room getting out your laptop to start your work and figuring a coffee wouldn't go astray either at that point in the afternoon. You had been sipping your iced latte and going through photographers that you could get in to get the best shots of the club for your article. You hadn't even noticed the two suited up men making their way towards you.

"Miss R" the first one interrupted, breaking your concentration "Is now a good time for us to talk or would you like us to come back later?".

"Oh no, now is good" you blinked up at them as they took seats opposite you.

"I'm Hongjoong, and this is San" he continued smiling at you casually.

"Nice to meet you both" you greeted, remembering that San was the one that had collected Yunho the night before "Thank you for speaking with me" trying to not look like you had been totally floored by their good looks.

"Did you want to talk to us about why we started hosting?" San asked leisurely, leaning back on his chair.

"Yes but also about working for Chan and how you entertain your guests. It's a good way to sell your particular skills since you all seem to do things slightly differently" you explained.

"We can do that for you Miss R" Hongjoong grinned as you opened your notes and started listening to them. Both were very sweet so it was easy for you to get lost in the conversation until Chan reappeared at the table suited up and looking stupidly handsome.

"We are having dinner in a few. Did you still want to join us?" He grinned looking at how your eyes widened and you realized the time.

"Oh yes, yes I will change after if that is alright" you nodded, collecting your belongings together and thanking both the hosts for taking the time to talk to you. You followed Chan towards the elevator which took you both up to the fourth floor which was confusing to you.

"We are going to use this area tonight to give you a bit more time to chat since this area isn't open until after the bar" Chan explained, picking up on your train of thought instantly.

"How is it that you guys do that? Pick up what someone is thinking or feeling?" you narrowed your eyes at him in faux suspicion.

"We make our living on exploiting what women want, we wouldn't be very good at our jobs if we couldn't read you well" Seungmin sniggered as Chan pulled out a seat for you to sit in.

"That's very honest of you" you chuckled looking at him across the table.

"I'm Seungmin in case you haven't heard enough names over the past 24 hours" he smirked.

"Thank you for the reminder Seungmin, it isn't easy to talk to a dozen ridiculously handsome men without the added burden of remembering their names" you smiled dryly making Changbin laugh.

"He's just poking fun because he thinks he can" Chan sighed, giving Seungmin a look that you didn't quite understand.

"You can poke as much fun as you like Seungmin, I am after all just an interloper into your world" you continued smiling but pulled your face into the professional expression you used for work.

"I like you, you're way more fun than we expected" Changbin grinned casually as food started to arrive at the table.

"I took the liberty of ordering things you hadn't tried yet" Chan explained as you curled your brow at the plates in front of you, knowing that somehow he was responsible for it.

"So how does this all come together? Did you know each other before this? How do you make the jump from maybe I'll host to I'll escort on the side to, I'll open/work at an elite level like this?" You mused looking between them for clues to how this all worked because you had an inkling that at least the 8 core of elite hosts were closer and more equal than it first appeared.

"Well I told you how we came to open already but I'm assuming you want how we specifically found ourselves here?" Chan smirked already seeing that you had put more pieces together than he had supplied information for. You nodded as you put the first mouthful of souffle into your mouth before you paused savoring how good it was. 

"Well I met Chan years ago" Changbin started putting his fork down as he watched you eat a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips "We have been friends for years it was him that got me into hosting to begin with we were far younger then but it wasn't all that different except that working for other people meant a smaller cut of what you got paid but it was easy money while we were in uni".

"I met them later when I got a job as bar staff, not as a host at the same club. Jeongin was the same, we both became hosts at a different club later but we kept in touch" Seungmin added before taking another mouthful of pasta.

"So when and why did it jump from hosting to escorting?" you questioned letting Chan carve the large steak that was on the table and serve you a few slices.

"Why is easy, that was because the money was fantastic and being young and horny with easy access to women every night why not" Changbin laughed "The when was, I think just before my 21st birthday I had been hosting since I was 19 so I already learned all the skills I needed to flatter my way into that situation so why not get paid for it".

"Practical" you quipped sipping the wine that had been delivered to you "I mean why not get paid for what you like doing". All three of them laughed then as you didn't pass any judgment on them for their choices.

"This would be why everyone you have talked to so far is so enamored with you" Seungmin smirked, making your eyes widen in confusion.

"Excuse me?" you spluttered completely caught off guard.

"I agree doesn't judge openly and is oblivious to how she is seen by others" Changbin added as though it was an afterthought.

"I would respectfully call bullshit on that observation" you grumbled as your phone began ringing and your boss' name and number flashed across the screen "excuse me, my boss" you smiled. They nodded watching your change in demeanor as you answered the call mouthing thank yous to Chan.

"Good Evening Sir" you chirped, faking your enthusiasm to speak to him as you made your way across the room to the lift so you could slink out the back and get yourself ready.

"Your request for a photographer who can take artful photos is for what reason?" He gruffly demanded without greeting you.

"Well the bar is particularly attractive and last night alone I saw politicians wives, and half a dozen socialites if we can capture how beautiful and opulent it is we might be able to swing some fashion comments from them to boost out fashion pages and the male hosts here are very attractive the readers would very much like to have decent photos of them" you explained quickly trying to spin as much of a positive for him as you could even though you were wanting to move past him and to the editorials boss.

"If you can't take the photo's yourself then you can't expect us not to take the photographer fee from your paycheck" He continued telling you off subtly.

"Of course sir, I will do that instead sir" you swallowed as he hung up on you hoping that he would not be calling back with another complaint once you submitted the first draft of the editorial in a few days time. 

Stepping into Chan's office you locked the door and quickly slipped into the dress you had brought with you, after last night you had decided that you should also put a little more effort into your makeup so you blended in a little more so you weren't surprised by the knock at the door indicating you had taken longer than you should have.

"Sorry Chan" you apologized, unlocking the door and pulling it open coming face to face with Felix and Hyunjin.

"We meet again Miss R" Hyunjin purred playfully, taking your hand and kissing the back of it.

"Hello Hyunjin" you rolled your eyes at his dramatic flare.

"You look beautiful in emerald, it brings out your eyes" Felix smiled as you met his eyes instantly becoming transfixed with how beautiful he looked with his hair slightly tousled in a deep navy suit.

"Flirt" you mumbled shyly as Chan cleared his throat behind them both. 

"Sorry Chan, I didn't mean to take your office for so long" you apologized again as he chuckled.

"It's not a problem Miss R, shall we?" He offered you his arm in a friendly manner which you took before he led you out on the floor, missing the expression on both Felix or Hyunjin's faces but not the loud whoop of laughter that erupted as the door started to close.

Most of the second night was not as intense as the opening night less pomp and ceremony and far more rich women on a mission, you were content to sit on the second level watching the hosts come and go entertaining and the farewelling their guests, occasionally getting winks or nods of recognition before they dived back in for the next guests. You hadn't seen Felix, Hyunjin or Chan again during the course of the night but you had caught glimpses of Seungmin and Minho as their guests arrived and they escorted them upstairs but the more fly on the wall view of them working was making it much easier for you to think up how the start of your editorial would go and how you would sell the speakeasy bar of the enterprise at least. As the night wore on you found yourself more and more comfortable with the idea of being at Club 143 which was, you assumed at least, Chan's entire plan for you. He had welcomed you, fed you, given you access to his employees but you were struggling to actually figure out how you could justify the next few nights of sitting around observing when you really had probably gotten everything you needed. You made a note in your phone to speak with Chan about whether he had already had any professional photos taken of the place or his hosts that you would be able to use for the article.

After several hours had ticked by you made your way back towards Chan's office so you could change again and head home, entering the staff area you noticed there were a few of the boys sitting either having a break or getting ready to head back into the club.

"Miss R, you alright?" San called to you looking slightly concerned.

"I'm fine San, I just should be calling it a night" you smiled warmly back at him, his concern for you making you feel genuinely thankful. Entering Chan's office you collected your bag so you could change out of your dress and into your jeans again.

"Did you want me to grab you a car to take you back home? I'm sure Chan would want to make sure you were safe" he continued appearing at the open office door.

"That's too kind of you San" you chuckled as he made his way towards you to help you with the bag, taking it effortlessly from you and offering you his arm.

"I know I'm not Felix or Hyunjin but I still would like you to get home safely" He joked guiding you to the back entrance to the building to where the cars were and once again you found yourself being helped into a black luxury car "See you tomorrow Miss R" he grinned shutting the door for you to let the driver get you home.

After getting a decent night's sleep you decided it would be better to get as much of the draft done as possible so you could run through any final questions you had with Chan later that night. You were sure you had enough now to be able to write the article without needing to spend a full week taking up Chan or any of the others further time and preventing them making the full amount they should for an opening week, and if Chan had photo's of at least the hosts that you could use the article would be pretty much done and could go off to the editor to go over. Without meaning to, you managed to work all the way to lunch time before getting your things back together to head back to Club 143 for perhaps the last time depending on whether you needed to add any extra information to your editor, or Chan for that matter, request.

Arriving at 12:30 you made your way through the empty bar after being greeted by the doorman and waving to the bar staff who were preparing for the night's service. Making your way into the staff area you were surprised to find Chan meeting with some of his top hosts making you pause as you closed the door behind you.

"Miss R, you return to us again" Hyunjin smiled, waggling his eyebrows at you.

"I promise I will be out of your hair soon Hyunjin" you smirked watching him deflate slightly and the others to laugh.

"Hopefully not to soon" Chan grinned standing to take your bag and place it in his office "Come join us it will give you some more insight" he gestured for you to take a chair somewhere in the room so you did without argument, partly because you were being paid to learn about his business and partly because the closest empty chair happened to be besides Felix totally missing the look Chan gave the others as you sat yourself down and got your phone ready to take notes.

"We have been discussing how the first two nights went" Seungmin added, making you look up at him in case he was going to continue.

"It has been pretty profitable" Felix added easily.

"Have the ladies down stairs been interested in meeting the more exclusive hosts?" Chan asked, turning to you.

"Of course they have, have you not watched them just about drool every time they see any of you?" you chuckled knowing that they knew damn well how they were being received.

"Told you" Changbin smirked looking at Chan "Miss R is a professional, she sees things the same way we do".

"It's a different point of view to ask a woman though" Chan half smiled before looking back at you. "How have you found it though you have spent time in the bar, the third and fourth floors is this place a worthy use for your time if you weren't writing an editorial about us?". 

You paused thinking exactly how you should answer such a loaded question.

"I think you have achieved what you set out to do, the bar is beautiful you feel welcomed and safe there, your hosts are handsome and all slightly different so you can cater to a thousand different women's fantasies without much trouble and from what you have shown me so far the actual host experience is very enjoyable so I think any woman would enjoy it here" you explained watching him as you did you could tell he was very pleased with your answer but you could feel that he wanted just a little bit more from you.

"As much as all of that is exactly what I wanted to hear you missed on little detail" he smiled roguishly, his host persona peeking through "Would you want to spend time here if it wasn't for your job?"  

"Yes, I would come to the bar at least" you replied, careful to keep some of your professional face on so that you didn't need to admit to the fact that you could never afford their services.

"But you wouldn't use the host service?" Seungmin pushed which made you quirk your eyebrow at him.

"I'm not sure the smoke and mirrors are going to be all that believable now that I have seen what's behind it" you shrugged "Plus I'm not sure if you have noticed but you boys are expensive". They laughed loudly at that leaving you hoping that they thought you were joking about their costs.

"Well I guess we will have to set you up some proper host experiences for you over the next few days" Hyunjin smirked at you but his eyes filled with mischief.

"Are you going to tease me about level 5 the whole time I'm here?" you pouted dramatically, rolling your eyes.

"Honestly it might be good if we have you try hosts from each of the tiers so you can write which sort of experience you can get at each level to make it obvious we are only super exclusive at the top end of the scale." Chan agreed, looking at you to gauge your reaction "If that is alright with you I can give you a rough price estimate of each encounter and you can see if it meets the experience you have" he scratched the back of his neck as he continued to watch you.

"That's actually very sensible if you want me to include all the services you have here but if you only want me writing about the first tier or two of the hosts to leave the others more exclusive you wouldn't need to bother setting up more than one or maybe two hosts willing to waste their time with me" you nodded "as long as they will still be paid properly I will feel endlessly guilty stealing their earning time on me".

"Oh they will all be paid, it's for the editorial and therefore good for the overall job we will all be doing so don't worry about them but I think Hyunjin might be right you should sample all the levels so you can experience what each type of guest can expect". Chan mused before getting out his phone to check the booking calendar. "I'll put you with San tonight or perhaps Yunho depending on their bookings, you can be on level 3 then with one of us on level 4 the same and if we get you to agree maybe you could see another room on level 5". You knew your face flushed at his final statement but you couldn't help it. You couldn't escape the connotations that level 5 was going to lead to a full host experience including sex if you agreed and although it was incredibly tempting you didn't know if morally you should. "So you would get the same treatment as our most elite clientele who cannot be seen on the lower floors" Chan finished.

"That is a huge out of pocket cost to you Chan I couldn't possibly accept that" you almost stuttered covering it by clearing your throat.

"I insist, really I should have thought of that sooner" Chan sighed looking back at you with a soft expression "I have San for you tonight so you will get the first tier host experience tonight he has a free opening that you can fill as a favor".

"The last favor I did for you I ended up tipsy" you bit your lips embarrassed.

"That's exactly how the experiences should be though" Hyunjin grinned again, looking like he had won some sort of grand prize.

The rest of the afternoon was spent going over photos with Chan that he had already had taken that you could use for the editorial. Most were only of the establishment that sold how opulent it was so that made your life a little easier to be able to write about each different area and show what was to be expected. The photos of the hosts however were going to be a little more difficult, Chan had given you a hard drive that contained photos of each of the hosts in his employment and not you needed to pick which ones you wanted. You knew you would obviously need to use one of Chan but then should you just use pictures of the hosts you were going to see as part of this experiment or should you pick the most enticing pictures you could find. Unwittingly you stumbled onto some which were virtually softcore porn, some of the escorting hosts had done a series of photos to show off their bodies to entice customers, Hyunjin with his suit jacket off and his shirt open, Chan in just his suit pants his tie undone and hanging loosely around his neck, Changbin flexing his large muscular arms and Felix laying in silk sheets looking sinful. You could feel your face heating up but you couldn't stop staring at him, Felix even in this far more sensual pose was still so painfully beautiful that you didn't want to stop looking even though you knew you shouldn't be seeing him like that.

Shaking your head to clear the lust that was begging to cloud your eyes you walked to Chan's office to see if it was empty so you could get ready, it was now almost opening hours and you couldn't be late to your appointment with San. That would be most rude. You slipped into a royal blue satin dress that was simple yet flattering to emphasized your hips and chest while remaining not too low cut or short so appropriate you figured to be just another guest in a bar and not someone begging for attention, you fixed your makeup adding to what you were already wearing and returned to the waiting room to pack up your laptop and notes. Stepping back into the room you heard a soft whistle.

"Each dress makes you look more enchanting than the last" Felix smiled, taking your hand and twirling you.

"Thank you Felix, I thought I should look a bit more expensive since I'm spending a week here, don't want to make the place look shabby" you grinned feeling thrilled with his compliment.

"You always look beautiful" Felix reassured "and San is a lucky boy tonight getting to spend his time with you, we are all very jealous he whispered leaning in as though he was telling you secret information.

"I doubt I'm that interesting to him Felix" you chuckled, feeling warmth spreading through you at his words and the feeling of his breath on your skin.

"I was wondering if you wanted to get another coffee tomorrow? Before you have to come in to work some more" He asked softly without the host bravado that he showed out on the floors above.

"I would like that very much" you nodded, catching your bottom lip in your teeth as nerves suddenly set into your stomach.

"Can I have your number to text you so we can organize it?" he continued smoothly, seeming more confident at your reaction, handing you his phone you added your details and gave it back to him quickly. "Can I escort you out to find San?" he offered easily, his arm already in position for you to take.

"Thank you Felix" you grinned, taking his arm and allowing him to lead you out into the bar. 

San stood casually by the bar and appeared to be scanning the room for you as his eyes stopped on you the moment you appeared with Felix, smiling at him nervously you made your way over to him only for Felix to lean in and whisper something in his ear before turning his attention back to you.

"Enjoy your evening Miss R" he grinned cheekily allowing San to take his place at your side moving back into the crowd you assumed to tend to his own booked guest.

"You look gorgeous Miss R" San drawled softly his arm slipping behind you to guide you towards the stairs "We will be heading up to level 3 tonight so that I can thoroughly indulge your every whim"

"Thank you San" you almost blushed at the seductive tone his voice had taken on "you look very attractive yourself". With his arm wrapped protectively around your waist he led you to and from the elevator into the booth that had been arranged for you, it seemed to be further back towards the bar which seemed to give off the illusion of even more privacy as he pulled the curtains around you after helping you into the booth. The deep red velvet absorbing the outside noise enough for you to almost feel like you were alone with San.

Reaching just behind you, San pushed a discreet button which summoned a waiter with a bottle of chilled wine and San discreetly thanked him before pouring you a glass.

"So Miss R, tell me about you, tell me about what you have always wanted" San smiled one eyebrow raised

"You know about my job already San" you blinked wondering where he was going with this.

"Not your job, about what you want in life, kitten your future" he chuckled softly, his eyes trained on you with a softness that made you feel safe.

"I want to be a serious journalist, it’s still pretty male dominated in the world of journalism and women don’t seem to get a look in when it comes to crime reporting or heavier news. We are always left with lifestyle and beauty and I want more than that” you answered sincerely letting your guard down a little knowing that San wouldn’t admonish you for having aspirations.

“Aren’t you a serious journalist now? Looking into the seedy underbelly of hosting?” he smiled slyly leaning back into the plush velvet seat back and extending his arm behind you.

“That’s not what this is San, and you know it” you almost sighed knowing that he was only playing his role.

“I know but you are still taking your job seriously and working diligently on this editorial, I know your work will be noticed, how could it not be?” he encouraged, letting his arm drop from the top of the seat to sitting comfortably around your waist. You shivered unintentionally at his touch even through the layers of fabric that separated your skin, it was becoming very clear why Chan’s hosts were as in demand as they were.

“What do you want to do in your life, San?” you tilted your head to look at him through your fluffy eyelashes. 

“Being a host can have a short shelf life depending on how good you are” he explained gesturing around you both “you have more options if you move into a more companion business but it's not guaranteed” he shrugged casually as he finished topping up your glass.

“Companionship?” you knew it was probably a dumb question but you had to ask.

“Escorting” he chuckled watching your face change to one of understanding “guys like Chan or Minho will stay handsome well into their 30s and 40s so they can continue the work for as long as they like. But hosts have to be young to flatter the woman seeing them that's part of the fantasy”.

“So is escorting the plan then?” You questioned breezily hoping it wouldn't come across as an interview.

“Maybe, or I could open my own place” he smirked cheekily “would you visit me if I did?”

“San!” you fake gasped clutching invisible pearls at your throat “how scandalous”. You dissolved into giggles that were helped along by the bubbles you were drinking.

“Well I'll take that as a yes” he laughed heartily, shifting himself closer to your side and another waiter appeared through the curtain to deliver another bottle of wine. “What else do you have planned for your life? It can’t be all work and no play?” 

“I want to travel. I want to see as much of the world as I can. So Paris, Milan, Prague, Rio, Nepal I want to see everything. But mostly I want to find someone who won't push me into a life I don't want" you replied slowly each thought coming out of your mouth without being filtered by your better judgment as the rapport you felt with San felt real even if that was just the alcohol and his excellent acting.

"I would love to travel too" San nodded, "I would love to see the world with you" , his sly smile feeling very flirty as you sipped from your glass.

"With me?" you blinked the wine making its way through your system and removing a little more of your inhibitions.

"Of course a beautiful woman like you should be fed dessert in fancy restaurants, doted on completely while shopping and being bought every single thing that brings you joy, and worshiped nightly in every place you wanted to stay. How could any man not want to be the one giving you that life" San purred, sliding himself closer to you so he was now touching you with the whole side of his body, the warmth from his chest seeping through his suit and into you "I couldn't think of a more enjoyable way to spend my time than making love to you in moonlight in Paris or Prague".

You swallowed hard, your surprise was probably obvious to San but after a moment you remembered this was an act, San was being paid to charm you and say all the right things. Once again he topped up your glass, when he lent closer to speak to you his breath fanned across your skin giving you goosebumps at the thought.

"You are very good at this San" you smiled, turning slightly more towards him.

"But not that good as you can still see what I'm doing" he chuckled, breaking the sexy character slightly and showing the more playful side that you had already met.

"I wouldn't say that I was very swept up" you admitted softly making him grin further "But I should be letting you get back to actual paying guests".

"Stay just a little longer no unnecessary flirting I promise" San faux pouted before breaking into a grin.

"Oh no don't pout like that I can't say no to that face" you giggled the wine now making you feel a little less professional and a little more cheeky.

"Ah I found a weakness" he almost crowed proudly "I will have to make sure the following guys know".

"You wouldn't betray me like that would you San" you pouted in return trying not to laugh as his eyes widened at your reaction.

"You are not meant to get upset" he whined as you melted into giggles.

"Happily tipsy looks very, very good on you" San quipped once again leaning back into the plush fabric of the booth.

"You're being paid to say that" you challenged, raising your eyebrow at him before leaning towards him "It's nice to be flattered though".

"I'm not being paid to tell you the truth I'm paid to make a fantasy and this isn't fantasy" San replied honestly as a new waiter reappeared with a tray containing several dishes that you weren't expecting San instantly picked up on your confusion his pretty laugh filling the booth "Chan wanted you to have a full experience and with our level of host that includes dinner so he ordered for you, I hope that is alright".

"Of course he did" you rolled your eyes making San's laughter continue "that man knows no limits when it comes to flaunting the sense of opulence does he?".

"He does but he wants to make sure you can write a proper review and that is worth every cent to him" San's eyes were still crinkled into attractive little moons.

"I do appreciate where he is coming from but surely he knows I am writing a favorable editorial by now" you continued watching San carefully watching for any sort of tell to show he was being disingenuous.

"I'll be honest I figured you would stop staying after the opening hours if you hated it. Just do your interviews then leave" he shrugged carefully, portioning a fork full of lobster that he then brought to your mouth to try, his other hand hovering under your chin to catch anything that might fall. Strangely enough you found yourself opening your mouth for him to place the lobster against your tongue before grinning at you.

"I forget you are all strangely perceptive about women" you lopsidedly grinned savoring the delicious buttery taste “Is feeding me also part of the experience?”

"It's all part of the deal kitten" San laughed lightly winking at you for dramatic effect. You ate the rest of the meal chatting with San about anything and everything before letting him lead you back downstairs where he told you Chan had arranged a car to get you home, because Chan really did think of everything.

Waking slowly, after having more drinks in the past week than you were used to, you were very happy to write the rest of your editorial, you had everything you were going to need you would just add a few bits and pieces about the experiences that Chan had decided to give you but the rest, including the photographs, was now ready to be fully drafted and read over by one of your editors. You attached the draft to an email saying that there was still one more page that needed to be done but that they could go over the first few and the photos that Chan had graciously provided to make sure that it was what they were looking for before you started getting ready for your day and your potential coffee catch up with Felix. 

Getting together your outfit for the day and choosing your outfit for that night was a very strange experience. You had been dressing yourself with a little more care to spend your days looking as nice as you possibly could but picking your outfit for the evenings had so far been a little daunting, it was a need to look the part of the patron so that everything looked normal to anyone who viewed you in Club 143 but also wanting to look attractive and even a little sexy just because you wanted to see how whoever you were paired with would react. Each outfit had been a little more daring; the emerald dress you had been far more form fitting around your chest, the blue had flattered your figure making you feel more womanly and tonight’s outfit was a form fitting silky burgundy dress with fine straps and a low cut back and a slit up the thigh. 

Arriving at Club 143 after lunch you had still not heard from Felix but it didn’t really surprise you he had been booked out every single night you had been there to observe and he must have been needing to catch up on sleep. You continued through the bar waving to the staff you had already seen several times and making your way to Chan’s office to drop off your things before making yourself comfortable in the normal corner of the waiting room. It was still quiet none of the hosts had arrived yet and you passed the time talking to the bar staff and writing up thoughts that you could flesh out later about the next level of host experience, even though you were yet to find out who you were going to be paired with. Chan arrived two hours later and waved as he passed you talking on the phone to someone before entering his office and closing the door.

“All by yourself again?” a very familiar voice asked from the doorway behind you.

“I guess I am Felix, how was your night?” You smiled to yourself before turning your head towards him.

“It was work-like” he shrugged, plopping himself down in the chair opposite you.

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” you mused furrowing your eyebrows as you took in his appearance, he was still beautiful as ever but his eyes looked a little more downcast than you had seen them before.

“Both I guess” he sighed “It was profitable but it was just going through the motions, some nights are just more routine than others although I rarely have interesting ones” he admitted, his eyes flicking downwards before making contact with yours again.

“I never really thought about how all this must just be a day at the office for you guys, not everyday being enjoyable, some just tedious” you frowned slightly, the few glimpses you had been given of the darker side of the job were very unappealing to you.

“It’s not that any of us hate it” Felix countered “It’s just that it can get monotonous the same vapid women, the same fake interactions, the same facade over and over again but there are always going to have perks most of the time it's very easy to still see the attractive woman underneath who just wants to feel worshiped but sometimes you do come across women who you cannot find a single good quality about”.

“Hmm” you hummed not really knowing what to say. It made you feel a bit awful that there were nights that he had to pretend to feel attracted to someone and then have sex with them even though he had no interest in them.

“Let's talk about something else” he smiled trying to pick the mood back up “maybe we should have that coffee now” 

“Sure” you nodded hoping you would be able to perhaps make him feel a little better. Felix got up and went towards the kitchens to ask them for coffee you assumed and you were back to being alone saving your notes for later you decided to perhaps email Chan a draft copy of what you had written but he was still in his office so you didn’t want to disturb his work. Felix returned and offered his hand to you.

“Come on, follow me” with a mischievous glimmer in his eye you took his hand and allowed him to lead you to the elevator where he quickly swiped his key card before hitting the button to the fifth floor.

“Felix, where are you taking me?” you whispered a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

“Do you trust me?” he grinned impishly, not giving you any further explanation.

“Yes” you answered instantly, surprising even yourself by your own admission.

“Then you will see when we get there” he teased stepping closer to you. The door dinged and opened showing you the navy blue hallway that Can had shown you once before. Taking your hand in his again he beckoned you to follow him until he stopped at door 3, the room you had already seen briefly. “I’m not breaking any rules in showing you the room you have already seen” he soothed after noticing the slight trepidation in your eyes.

“You can read everything about me can’t you?” you contemplated following him into the room where there were already two hot coffees and two pieces of cake waiting for you in the lounge area of the large room.

“Not everything which is why you are so interesting” Felix clarified “Your honesty is what masks things from us, we all find it fascinating that you can see through the act without much trouble but also never judge us or behave as though you are better than us”.

“That’s because I am not better than you” you uttered feeling a little confused “I’m just a person like you Felix, like all the guys that work here”. You sat at one end of the lounge opposite him taking your cup and sipping from it.

“That right there is why every host here wants to have their five minutes to talk to you” he grinned toothily “A few sentences and you make us all feel better about a world of different things”.

“You are being too kind” you argued softly.

“You are selling yourself short” he shot back the dazzling smile still on his face “We had several media sources wanting to cover this opening mostly because it aligns them with the powerful women who come here whether they are CEO’s in their own right or the wives and girlfriends of powerful men. All of them spoke with Chan but you were the only one who didn’t speak down to him as though he was just another whore. You treated Chan with respect and with honest interest which is why your publication got the job”. Felix’s explanation hit you like a truck. You had been the one to volunteer for the position to pitch the editorial and also write it when your boss had mentioned it and your coworkers had seemed to have no interest but you hadn’t realized that there were other media companies vying for the same editorial.

“Who else did he speak to?” you asked concerned that maybe the job would have been done better by one of your competitors and Chan had only settled for you.

“SM Media Inc, KQ Publishing, YG Multimedia Co. None of them would have done as good a job as you” he shrugged again eating a mouthful of cake.

“Well I’m pleased he wanted me for the job. I'll send him the article before it’s published so he can go over it” you nodded slowly considering how you would get away with changing the editorial you had already sent in for viewing if he hated it. Felix laughed heartily, he seemed to be taking great pleasure in watching the cogs move around in your head.

“So tell me what else you do in your life Felix? I want to know something you have not told me yet” you smirked, making him stop laughing and turn serious again.

Returning back downstairs you found that half a dozen other hosts had arrived including Hyunjin who blew you a kiss as you walked past him, and also that Chan had emerged from his office. He stood from behind his desk and wandered into the waiting room as he noticed you pass by his office doorway

“So I realized that it might be a better idea to let you choose who you would like for your last host experience” Chan smiled kindly watching you take a seat and log yourself back into your laptop to continue working.

“Oh really? I assumed it would be whoever didn't have a booking” you blinked looking at him with curiosity as he continued over to where you were sitting.

“Well if I asked for volunteers I think Hyunjin would have fallen over himself to put his name down, and I'll admit I wouldn't mind it being me either but it should be your choice so you are totally comfortable” he continued a slight glint in his eye making you unsure if he was teasing you or not while Hyunjin nodded vigorously just behind him

“Well who have you decided I'll be seeing tonight?” you raised your eyebrow at him.

“Tonight you're with yours truly” he grinned smugly, making Hyunjin and Seungmin roll their eyes in unison.

“Let me think about it then” you smiled, laughter coloring your voice as you began typing up a few more notes.

“Booking is at 9 Miss R” he chuckled, heading back towards his office door.

“I won’t be late” you called after him.

You started changing at 8 o’clock sharpe so that you would have enough time to get your hair and makeup sorted as well as changing. Chan was nowhere to be seen so you assumed he was out on one of the floors or entertaining another guest which allowed you to take your time. When you finally emerged it was almost time for you to meet him so you opened his office door and stepped into the waiting room.

“Woah!” Jeongin whistled, looking you up and down slowly.

“Thank you Jeongin” you flushed slightly, your hands moving to smooth invisible wrinkles in the fabric.

“Would you like an escort to find Chan?” he offered a wide smile, his eyes turning into pleasant little moons as he offered his arm to you.

“Actually, yes please” you breathed knowing that he would probably see your nerves if you tried to hide them.

“You don’t need to be nervous Miss R. Chan doesn’t bite unless you ask him to and even then you would need to ask nicely” Jeongin joked trying to alleviate your fears.

I’ll try to remember that for the editorial then” you laughed lightly feeling slightly better.

Stepping onto the level 4 with Jeongin was a little odd. You could still see Changbin and Han entertaining two girls who looked like sisters in one booth and Minho leading his client towards another booth. The curtains of two others were pulled closed already meaning they were full but all the others were only half closed or still empty. 

“Here you go Miss R, step this way” Jeongin pulls aside one of the half pulled curtains to reveal Chan in all his glory leaning against the side of the booth watching the empty portions of the room.

“Not even a second late” Chan chuckled, offering you his hand to take as Jeongin winked at you before leaving. Helping you to get comfortably seating he moved to pull the curtain closed giving you a single glimpse of Felix who was looking straight at you, eyes wide, and distinctly not at the woman beside him who looked every bit the beautiful and rich CEO, his slight frown before the curtain separated you leaving you with an odd feeling in the pit of your stomach.

“So gorgeous, are you ready for me?” Chan’s velvety voice surrounded you like honey as you turned your face towards him. You had obviously spent time with Chan, you had even seen the professional photos that they had all had taken but it hit you like a lightning strike just how easy it would be to be wooed by him in this setting.

“You look devine tonight” he purred, sliding a little closer to you, watching you closely he slowly took your hand to kiss the inside of your wrist “you also don’t need to be nervous”.

“I was told you wouldn’t bite unless I asked you nicely” you tilted your head to gauge his reaction.

“For you I would do anything if you asked me nicely or not” you raised one eyebrow almost challengingly making you swallow hard and your eyes widened slightly.

“Good to know” you breathed a flush creeping across your cheeks.

“I was told by a reputable source that you like sweet things” he continued with a teasing smile gracing his handsome face as a waiter appeared with a tray of cocktails “so I took some liberties and ordered you some dessert”.

Placing down two cocktails you could see quite obviously that Chan had asked the others what you had drank, eaten and spoken about because the chocolate martini that was for you was very close to a favorite drink of yours.

“Thank you Chan” you whispered, picking up your glass to sip at it, your mouth suddenly very dry.

“I also heard you do not want to be placed in a cage” his dark cinnamon eyes made you feel like he could see into your soul.

“San has loose lips it seems” you added the corners of your mouth twitching as his grin increased.

“No, I am just incredibly persuasive when it comes to you” he advised sipping his own drink which to you looked very much the opposite of your drink. Chan seemed very good at keeping you somewhere between flustered and hypnotized but after a few more moments your brain caught up.

“I can see the difference now, from level three to level 4” you admitted coyly relaxing your posture slightly “San was particularly good but you are exceptional at this”. Chan faulted slightly before breaking into a breathtaking grin.

“I have to say you are quite remarkable at seeing through the act, it’s a bit of a rare gift” he hummed approvingly “Had to admit it’s a little bit of a turn on actually”. You coughed as you almost inhaled your drink at his words making him chuckle at you.

“Did you actually say that or did I imagine that?” you sniffed trying to regain your composure.

“No I said it, Hyunjin told me it was a completely different feeling watching you see straight through our usual way of working and I get now why he wanted to take you upstairs” Chan divulged “San let me know that you were the most fun he has had so far and you seem to have bewitched our little Felix”. Your jaw dropped slightly allowing Chan to slide closer to you lifting one finger to shut it again for you his fingers then moving to grasp your chin gently tilting your face towards his. It felt magnetic like you were being drawn closer to him every second but the illusion was shattered when you heard a loud shrill laugh from somewhere outside the curtained bubble you were in.

“I think perhaps I need another drink” you murmured as Chan dropped his hand away from you. He tilted his head slightly and a waiter appeared as if summoned, although you were sure CHan was just more subtle about the button to call the staff than San.

“Can we have another round and bring dessert this time please” Chan instructed smoothly not moving away from you instead slipping out of his jacket, leaving him in only a black shirt with no tie.

“The drink isn’t dessert then?” you mused, thinking he had been mentioning the sweet drink earlier.

“No I have something far more substantial for you, after all I need to leave a sweet taste in your mouth from the experience” he flirted effortlessly knowing that the choice of words would push you just a little.

“Still hoping I’ll come back after this editorial is done then?” you teased back knowingly

“Oh I have no doubt you will come back, I’m hoping to sway you to come back to level 3 or 4” he cheekily retorted, his dimples shining.

“Well Mr Bang that all depends on what you have got for me?” you giggled as the waiter reappeared and stopped Chan’s comeback in its tracks. Placing down another martini for you excused himself to collect the rest of Chan’s request. Moments later he reappeared with a tray full of what looked like chocolate truffles and strawberries dusted with gold flakes.

“As with San last night I like to go all out” Chan grinned like a cat that got the cream “We get these in from France they are made with the finest Swiss chocolate and the best French champagne”. He lifted one off the tray and brought it to your lips which you opened keeping your eyes locked on his. He was right they were the most delicious chocolate you had ever eaten and you were quite alright with the idea of sitting drinking your martini with him feeding you, but you assumed that was due to the rather strong cocktail you had already drunk and the one you were about to start. You continued chatting to Chan a little more casually after he started hand feeding you strawberries and chocolate until you had accidentally had a third martini and your head was actually fuzzy.

“Would you like another drink or would you like something else?” Chan murmured sensually his lips only inches from your ear.

“I think I’m good” you smiled lazily, enjoying the warmth of his breath on your neck.

“I’m sure you are very good gorgeous, but that wasn’t what I meant” he quipped leaning in closer so his lips brushed your earlobe making you involuntarily shudder “I love that you are so eager to please, such a perfect little tease”.

Your brain wasn’t fast enough to react with wit instead opting to just hum and let him get even closer to you, being ever the gentleman Chan gave you time to respond between each gentle touch of his fingers running down you bare back, each brush of his lips against your skin until you were almost embarrassingly pliant.

“Tell me to stop and I will, gorgeous” he whispered huskily in your ear before actually pressing his lips to your neck making you gasp softly turning your head toward him. Following the line of your jaw Chan kissed his way to you lips each one slightly more passionate than the last until his lips pressed against yours. His soft plump lips felt stupidly good against your own especially when he dragged your bottom lip between them using his teeth and making you sigh with pleasure, his tongue traced the seam of your lips teasing you and hoping you would allow entrance which you did too caught up in the moment and the alcohol to be thinking quick enough to stop yourself. 

“Mmm… wait Chan stop” you slurred slightly as he broke away from your lips to kiss his way to your earlobe, your brain finally registering what you were doing. To his immense credit Chan did stop instantly removing not only his lips and hands from you but also sliding away from you so you were no longer touching.

“I apologize” he replied instantly “I didn't mean to overstep”.

“You didn’t, not really, I’m just a little too drunk for this to be a good idea” you admitted trying to shift the alcohol from your brain so you could think better.

“I will get you a car home” Chan smiled genuinely, his eyes shining with something that looked a little like admiration and a little like affection.

“Thank you” you swallowed as Chan moved to help you stand from the booth, steadying you by wrapping his arm around your waist as he walked you to the elevator. Moving past the tables you saw the booth that Felix was in earlier still occupied which gave you a strange sense of relief that he was still on this floor and not the one above but that was shattered we the curtain opened and you saw him, his arms wrapped around his patron feeding her strawberries the same way Chan had fed them to you. You looked away quickly hoping that both Chan and Felix would not notice but you had a feeling that Chan already had as he pulled you slightly tighter against his side as the elevator doors opened stepping inside you turned towards the closing doors to see Felix’s face fall as his eyes landed on you for the brief moment before the door separated you both.

Chan led you to his office to collect your things, easily carrying both your bags on one of his arms making sure you were stable enough to not hurt yourself. He mentioned to the driver that he was to escort you into the building and help you with your bags before taking your hand in his and kissing your knuckles.

“We will see you tomorrow Ms R” he beamed, helping you with your seatbelt even though it was unnecessary.

“But we haven’t talked about tomorrow’s host experience” you protested, suddenly aware that you hadn’t even discussed the topic properly yet. You felt yourself flush, hoping that Chan wouldn't notice it over the pink already dusting your cheeks from the alcohol you had been drinking.

“Good thing I had already put him aside for you then” his eyes twinkled as he spoke and his dimples were on full display.

“What?” You stammered “I haven’t told you yet”.

“I know, Felix asked to host you if you requested him and I figured you would. You seem to have already formed an attachment to each other” He continued before chuckling.

“Goodnight Chan'' you mumbled a tad embarrassed that you were so transparent to him.

“Goodnight Miss R” Chan replied teasingly, shutting the door and allowing the driver to take you home.

The following morning was not as pleasant as the previous few mornings, you woke up nursing a headache and a mortifying recollection of embarrassing events where you had almost let yourself take things too far with Chan then practically told him of your little crush on Felix, which you realized the night before was exactly that, a crush, there was no way that you would ever entertain the idea that a grown woman like yourself would end up with a silly little crush on a man you were writing about. It was the least professional thing you had ever done and now you needed to turn up at the same place that he worked and face not only him but his boss who knew about it. You needed to distract yourself. You needed coffee and something sweet for breakfast then perhaps you would feel better.

You washed up and got dressed into a simple shirt and jeans before venturing out for the sustenance you needed to help with your predicament. You knew deep down you hadn’t actually done anything wrong, the host experience is to sell a fantasy of feeling loved or desired or more often than not both and that every single one of Chan’s hosts lived up to that. Each fantasy they created absolutely made you feel that the average woman they saw would have been totally swept off her feet by them. You, once tipsy, were almost swept up in it too so you knew they were good, you knew they were worth the money but still a little part of you was sad it was all just a fantasy and potentially the hosts themselves were not as happy as they seemed.

Your constant thoughts had made you almost miss the door to the cafe you were heading to. It was almost a twenty minute walk from your apartment but the coffee was so good you would happily make the trip. Moving your way through the few filled tables you found yourself an empty seat and sat down looking through your phone as you waited to order. The quiet chatter and the smell of freshly ground coffee gave you some much needed comfort after your order was taken sitting staring into space. You barely registered your phone's message alert, checking it you noticed it was from an unknown number, you frowned but opened it anyway.

 Hey. It’s Felix, are you alright after last night? I saw you leave the floor with Chan so I wanted to check in.

 You read it twice to make sure you had read it correctly then smiled of course the first text he sent you and it’s asking about your welfare, he was too sweet for his own good and that was the problem. He was otherworldly beautiful and far too sweet which of course is what made him so successful as a host, but it also made him too attractive to you. Sighing you thought about how you would reply you didn’t want to sound like it was a flippant thing given he was concerned but you didn’t want him to think the worse either.

Hi Felix, I’m ok just nursing a little bit of a headache but I’ll be fine by the time I head in this afternoon. I hope you had a successful night.

You put your phone down to concentrate on the pancakes that had been delivered to you. The sugar and dough no doubt likely to help with how you felt you would just need to remember to pace yourself a little bit better tonight.

That’s great, I’m glad you’re feeling alright. I know Chan has a tendency to be a little intense sometimes, especially on the 5th floor. I saw on my schedule you're with me tonight so I’ll do my best to keep you entertained :) 

You stopped completely, almost dropping your fork, as you looked over the message coughing when some of the pancake you were eating went down the wrong way. Felix had assumed you had gone upstairs and had sex with Chan. Your stomach dropped, you didn’t want any of them thinking that you had, but especially Felix, because you hadn’t. Sipping some water you blinked the stray moisture from your eyes that the coughing fit had caused and pressed the call button.

“Sorry to call Felix but this is easier to explain than text” you blurted as soon as he answered his phone.

“That’s fine Miss R, you sound stressed, are you sure you feel well?” he asked, his voice sounding concerned against the noise in the background of his surroundings. 

“I really am fine, just a headache, but I had to correct you. I didn't go to level 5 last night. I got a little too tipsy and Chan took me downstairs to put me in a car to get me home. I swear nothing happened with Chan” You explained your tone at a higher pitch than normal making you sip your water again to soothe your throat.

“It’s fine if you did, I wouldn’t judge you for that the way you don’t judge me” Felix reassured you, sounding almost relieved if you were honest with yourself. You let out a large breath making him chuckle slightly.

“I didn’t want you to think the wrong thing that’s all but about tonight Chan told me that I would be able to be in with you since you had an opening which I was surprised about actually” you admitted shyly a flush decorating your neck as you spoke.

“Oh you requested me then” he teased sweetly “Well I’m happy to be your first pick and I’m glad I had an opening”.

“I will see you tonight then Felix” you added not knowing what else to say.

“You will Miss R” he replied, hanging up instantly and leaving you staring at your phone. God, you felt even more embarrassed calling him to assure him you hadn’t had sex with anyone, in public, when he didn’t even seem to mind. You finished your breakfast quickly before returning home so you could overthink every word you had said over the past week while you picked out the final outfit from your closet for your final night at Club 143.

You settled on the outfit that most made you think of Felix a black off the shoulder mini dress with a flippy hem, like the one you had tried on in the department store the morning you had run into him, and simple black pumps. You decided you would just add some winged eyeliner to your everyday look and maybe some bolder lipstick to take it from regular working to host experience working and hoped it would be enough to make a slight impression on Felix so that he would at least potentially remember you after the night was over and you had left his life. Furrowing your brow you looked at yourself in the mirror your bag packed behind you on the bed to change and your simple jeans and a square necked top you were utterly plain compared to every single host you had met, and although they had all been sweet and accommodating during the past week with them you couldn’t help feel a little sad it was over. You did suppose that Chan had a point you could always just attend Club 143 as a patron you didn’t need to buy their time you could always just say hello in passing and pretend that it was enough, pretend it didn’t feel strange that they pretended so well to almost become friends to actually not be at all.

Collecting your bags you made your way back to work taking the slow and scenic way wandering the neighboring streets to see what else was around. Finally making your way into the main entrance you were greeted like you had been before by Chan’s bar and floor staff before entering into the staff area to set up your laptop with the final bits of writing you would need to add. It was later than you normally showed up and Chan was in his office with several of his elite hosts so you just bypassed his office for now. Your editor had sent back a few tweaks for you to make to the editorial but was overall quite supportive and approving of what you had come up with so it was just finishing up the experience with San and writing out Chan’s before finishing it all tomorrow and submitting it. For the final draft stages. You started typing, noting to yourself to add a head shot of both San and Yunho to hopefully further their customer base as a thank you for their time, only to hear a huge roar of laughter from Chan’s office making you jump. 

“Miss R” Seungmin sang as he wandered out of the office towards you. “Could you join us for a moment?”.

“Of course Seungmin” you eyed him warily, making him waggle his eyebrows at you “what are you getting me into?”.

“Nothing bad. We just want to go over last night with you” he grinned his eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Well shit” you sighed, standing slowly and following him into Chan’s office. 

“We were just talking about your date with Chan” Seungmin started as you stepped through the door.

“Yeah and how you disappeared with our dear boss” Hyunjin grinned, making you look at the ceiling for help.

“Chan claims he cannot kiss and tell, but we are pretty sure we know where you ended up” Changbin teased, looking from you to Chan.

“Really? And where was that?” you mocked his tone slightly making Chan grin and Minho laugh loudly.

“Upstairs of course” Hyunjin whispered, shouting dramatically as though he was helping you jog your memory, making Changbin snicker.

“Really? Because I’m pretty sure upstairs looks nothing like the inside of a car. Or my apartment block for that matter” you replied dryly, making Chan and Seungmin laugh while Hyunjin’s jaw dropped and Changbin looked confused.

“Felix said he saw you getting in the lift with Chan and that Chan gave a thumbs up” Changbin argued as though you didn’t know where you had been.

“Felix did see me get in the elevator, but you do know that elevators go both up and down” you tried to hold in a laugh at the indignant look on Changbin’s face.

“So you didn’t go upstairs with Chan?” Hyunjin repeated.

“I did not” you laughed “How much money did you have riding on that?”.

“More than they should have” Chan smirked as Hyunjin opened and closed his mouth a few times.

‘Can I finish my editorial now? Or did we need to discuss the sex I didn’t have with Chan further?” you raised your eyebrows waiting for one of them to answer.

“You go back to work Miss R” Chan smiled “I think Hyunjin will be bringing you a coffee in a little while”.

“Aw thank you Hyunjin” you grinned, walking back to your chair and going back to what you needed to get done. Still having the occasional giggle about the conversation you just had.

By the time the other hosts started appearing and it was time for you to start getting ready you were beginning to get nervous. An elite host experience Chan had called it and it was exclusive to only those willing to pay a small fortune to spend time in private with a host of their choice. Felix would probably meet you out in the bar like you had done with San since you were heading straight up to level five and bypassing the other host floors. There would be dinner and you would have Felix all to yourself for the whole night which was a huge amount of time compared to the other experiences Chan had his hosts offer. Closing down your laptop you packed away all of your work items and moved towards Chan’s office to change.

“Am I able to use your office again to get changed or are you still busy?” you enquired sticking your head into his office where he was sitting at his desk already decked out in his deep gray suit. Chan got up and walked over to you taking your work bag from your hands and placing it beside his desk

"Sure and what color are you wearing tonight? just out of interest" Chan smirked stepping out into the staff area.

"Black" Felix answered for you before you could say a word, his voice surrounding you like smoke.

"How did you know I bought a black dress?" you turn towards his voice, your eyes widening the moment you saw him in his satin black suit jacket looking like a model straight off the catwalk.

"Oh I didn't know that I just knew what I bought" he smiled dazzlingly, holding out a large white gift bag tied with a deep red ribbon.

"I don't understand" you mumble, your brow creasing in confusion looking at the bag before he took hold of your hand and placed the handles of the bag in your palm, closing your fingers around it.

"You didn't think you could try on that dress and look that good and I wouldn't insist you wear it?" He smirked, leaning forward and lowering his voice.

"You didn't!" you squealed loudly as he laughed and wandered out into the bar you guessed so he was out of the room before you could argue back.

"What dress are we talking about?" Chan asked, perplexed, his eyes scanning the bag for a label.

"Oh is that the McQueen one? Felix said she looked a million dollars is that one" Hyunjin grinned following Felix's trail through the room and stopping beside you.

“No!...he’s not allowed to do that���fuck where did he go?” you scoffed while still holding the bag.

“He is and he did” Hyunjin winked at you “Now go put the dress on so I can see if he was right”. You gave a resigned sigh you knew this would be a battle you would never win. Too many rich boys with too much money was always going to end in stupid decisions like buying dresses for women they barely knew because they could.

Turning silently you went into Chan’s office and shut the door but not before hearing Hyunjin announce loudly that you were about to knock their socks off so they should all wait around for a bit. You unwrapped the dress carefully, trying to not mess up the ribbon or the tissue paper it was wrapped so beautifully in, your fingers caressing the silk that you had already tried on and secretly loved but had thought you would never in a million years own. Your eyes stung slightly as a stray tear fought to make its way free of your eye, Felix’s gesture proving that his kindness and sweetness knew no bounds and that you and your little crush were doomed to an inevitable heartbreak at the end of the night. Slipping out of your clothes and into the dress you remembered you were going to struggle with the zip again.

“Hyunjin?” you called through the door

“Yes princess” he called back obviously just outside the door.

“Who is waiting out there with you?” you asked as sweetly as you could.

“Oh! There is Chan, Minho, Hongjoon, San, Yunho, Seungmin and of course me” he listed off.

“Excellent” you popped your head out of the door “San can you help me with the zipper please?” you smiled as he grinned and stood up immediately.

“Wait, I can help” Hyunjin protested.

“I know, but I asked San” you quipped as San moved past Hyunjins disappointed face and into the room with you.

“You look exquisite” San whispered appreciatively as you turned around, his fingers easily sliding the zipper up your back.

“Thank you San” you smiled genuinely as you turned back to face him.

“Felix is a lucky, lucky man” he smiled lopsidedly before slipping back out of the room which caused Hyunjin to protest all over again.

You fixed your makeup and took a steadying breath, your nerves were now sky high but you knew there was no turning back now so you stepped out of Chan's office and into a room filled with silence, except for San’s whistle. 

“You look incredible” Chan grinned, taking your hand and kissing your knuckles.

“Thank you Chan” you smiled while worrying your lower lip slightly between your teeth.

“You look far better than just a million dollars” Hyunjin whispered reverently, his eyes wide.

“You are going to make me blush if you keep complimenting me” you shuffled on your feet slightly. 

“Can I escort you out to meet Felix?” Yunho interrupted getting in before any of the others could say anything else.

“That would be amazing, Yunho” you grinned at him as he raced across the room to take your hand and place it in the crook of his arm. You didn’t feel any different stepping out of the staff area into the bar, it was the same as every other evening the difference was going to be when you came face to face with Felix.

“You don’t need to be nervous” Yunho muttered trying to hide he was speaking to you from prying eyes “Felix won’t do anything you don’t want him to, and there is no expectation on you” his hand squeezed yours where it sat in the crease of his elbow “I didn’t even know you could get nervous”.

“Funny Yunho, I’m not immune to everything” you whispered in reply knowing he was right everything that would happen tonight would be the same as all the previous nights you had spent in the club. The ball was entirely in your court. 

Yunho walked you to the entrance where Felix stood waiting for you, several women trying to get his attention but being politely declined until his eyes landed on you.

“Excuse me ladies, my queen awaits” he smiled graciously, walking towards you and Yunho. Yunho for all his imposing presence disappeared effortlessly into the crowd as Felix stepped into your space to take your hand moving it to his lips to kiss the inside of your wrist softly.

“Felix” you smiled coyly, making his perfect face light up as he moved to wrap his arm around your waist to lead you to the elevator.

“You look bewitching” he breathed in your ear making you shiver against him which seemed to only encourage him into pulling you tighter against him. Virtually every woman in the bar watched you with envy at being beside him.

“You look incredibly handsome yourself” you replied feeling more comfortable now that you were with Felix again. He grinned as he stepped into the elevator swiping his card to get you to the exclusive fifth floor starting what you knew would be a once in a lifetime night.

“Chan made sure you had seen one room when he gave you the tour so now I can show you a second” Felix broke the silence between you.

“Did you pick which room you would show me?” you tilted your head to look at his profile.

“Yes, because it's a particular favorite of nearly all of us hosts” he admitted, easily meeting your eyes.

“A favorite as in it makes you guys a lot of money or favorite as you guys actually like being in that room?” you teased gently 

“We like being in this room, it's the easiest to make comfortable for clients who perhaps aren’t interested in certain things” he carefully explained letting you know before you even reached the room that there would be no pressure on you.

“Good to know” you beamed as the elevator door opened to the navy blue hallway. Taking your hand he led you down the hallway passing door number three and leading you to door number 8. Unlocking the door he allowed you to step inside the room first letting you take in your surroundings before wrapping his arms smoothly around you from behind.

The room was the opposite of what you expected it wasn’t some overly ostentatious room styled after a luxury hotel room instead the blue and gold continued only instead of navy blue it was more of a deep teal blue with antique gold light fixtures and dark coloured furniture but the main focal point was the dozen upon dozens of candles flickering on almost every surface in front part of the room stood a black glass table with place settings for two large floor candelabras covering the area in a romantic golden glow. Further into the room dark lounge suites and the further again a bed made up in matching teal sheets all surrounded but flickering light.

“Do you think you prefer this room?” his deep honey voice in your ear.

“Yes this room is beautiful” you replied in awe, feeling his arms squeeze you slightly before unwrapping them from you and leading you towards the table pulling out your chair for you.

“I thought rather than the normal ridiculous menu I would try something new with you” he started taking his own chair as you heard the keycard beep for the door to open revealing a waiter wheeling a food serving cart with large silver cloches covering several dishes. The waiter placed the dishes on the table and then left himself out of the room as quietly and discreetly as possible.

“New in what way?” you tilted your head looking from Felix to the covered dishes.

“I already know that your immune to the normal charm act so I figured instead of playing the part I usually would, I’ll just be me” he shrugged “ I can still give you the full experience without pretending to be something that you will see through anyway so why not have a normal dinner together like we would if this was any other normal date?”. Lifting the cloches and placing them back on the serving cart you were met with two types of pasta, Caprese salad and arancini with aioli. You realized immediately what he meant instead of ridiculous amounts of over the top food he was trying to keep you as comfortable as possible.

“This looks fantastic Felix” you grinned toothily making his shoulders relax a little more. Felix served you a little bit of everything insisting you could eat whatever you liked but you were more interested in just spending the time you had available with him.

“This is the last night you’re going to be here isn't it?” Felix enquired quietly between mouthfuls.

“For this editorial yes” you nodded, taking a sip of the white wine that Felix had chosen to go with your meal. “But I thought I might come back for a drink or two sometimes, the bar is great and it feels really safe as a woman to be in here”.

“But that is only the bar” Felix pressed you slightly “You won’t return to the hosts will you?”.

“I might, I couldn’t obviously be paying for Chan or you to entertain me, you are too pricey for a lowly journalist. But I could see San or Yunho occasionally” you admitted pulling your bottom lip between your teeth as his eyes narrowed for a fraction of a second.

“Are you interested in seeing San or Yunho again?” I know you spent time with Yunho for the editorial and you had the mid level host experience with San” he continued but you could tell he was selecting his words carefully. 

“That was just an example, someone like me could only afford the basic or mid level host experience at a place like this. It doesn't have to be either San or Yunho specifically although they are both a lot of fun” you confessed hoping that he liked that answer better.

“Oh so you would be happy to see anyone then?” he teased.

“Well I’d see you but your price tag is more than I could afford unless you take payment in other ways” you teased back making his eyes widen before he laughed, the rich deep sound sinking into your skin like the sun's warmth. 

“I’m sure we could figure something other than money out if you were interested in only seeing me” he smirked, his eyes darkening as little as he wet his lower lip.

“I thought you said you wouldn’t be playing the part tonight” you raised your eyebrow “yet here you are flirting like Hyunjin would”.

“This isn’t the facade, this is me” he confided, his voice deeper than it had been before as he stood from the table and slowly walked around to your chair pulling it away from the table so you were now facing him. “I’ve never been more serious”.

“Felix” you whispered softly, confused where this was going.

“How about I show you what I mean” he murmured leaning down he cupped your face gently angling your chin higher so you were looking into his whiskey colored eyes, his thumb gently traced along your bottom lip as he leaned in tentatively pressing his lips to yours in a featherlight kiss giving you time to pull away. When you didn’t move he smiled graciously, pressing his lips against yours again this time with a little more force allowing you to kiss him back with your hand moving to wrap around his wrist. Taking your other hand in his he helped you stand his plump lips never leaving yours, pulling you flush against him.

“Do you understand what I mean now or should I explain further?” he whispered against your lips letting you decide how much you wanted from him.

“A little more should make it crystal clear” you sighed softly you words cut off as his soft lips claiming yours tenderly once more, Felix teasing your bottom lip with his teeth until you were gasping breathlessly into the kiss, his tongue dancing with yours sensually he moved one hand around your waist to hold you to him. 

“You have no idea how badly I’ve wanted this” he smirked, pulling away from you just enough to slide his hands around you deftly gliding the zip of your dress down and watching it fall from your chest. Licking his lips as your upper body became completely exposed to him “I had never been so jealous of Hyunjin before after he said he had kissed you”. His fingers caressing your cheek while he leaned in to kiss your neck his lips softly tracing your pulse point before continuing down to your chest.

“I wanted to end Chan when he bragged about touching you, kissing you” he continued his hands cupping and lightly squeezing your breasts as he kissed his way back to your face. You couldn’t move, enjoying the feeling of his hands and lips on, your arm wrapped around his neck to keep yourself upright, carding your fingers through the hair on the back of his head..

“Neither meant anything if that helps” you whimper feeling his lips turn up against your lips as you pressed them back against his taking the initiative for the first time since Felix had touched you. 

“It does” he smirked, stepping back from you and leading you towards the bedroom area of the suite, the warmth of his hand anchoring you to him. Sitting on the bed he guided you into his lap, your skirt bunching up around your waist as you straddled his strong thighs. You kissed him again allowing him to slip his tongue between your eager lips to slide against your own in a slow dance for dominance beginning between you which he easily won as you pushed his jacket off of his shoulders to get closer to his skin. Felix let his hands roam your sides and arse encouraged you to grind yourself against him while you buried your hands in his amazingly soft hair tugging slightly as your need for him started to build, making him hum against your lips. Without much effort Felix switched your places you back now pressed against the soft mattress as he discarded his jacket and returned to kissing his way across your body, his lips left a scorching path down your chest until he reached your breasts taking one into his mouth while his hand played with the other.

“Fuck your tits are incedible” he breathed against your nipple circling the now swollen bud with his tongue as you arched against him slightly letting out a string of whiny noises “and you are so sensitive, your going to drive me mad baby”.

Your heart skipped a beat at the term of endearment that fell from his beautifully plump lips as he made his way across to your other breast giving it the same torturously pleasurable treatment. Nipping and sucking at your flesh like he was a man possessed. Moving lower he kissed his way to your belly button before hooking his fingers into the material of your dress that remained bunched around you carefully lowering it down your thighs dropping it beside the bed leaving you is just black lace underwear that he admired slowly dragging his finger along the pattern that covered your core.

“Lix” you whimpered softly your skin one fire beneath his warm touch.

“Fuck call me that again” me purred sexily closing his eyes while his fingers continues to trace across your flesh.

“Lix please” you whined watching his adam's apple bob as he swallowed hard, his head tipping back slightly seemingly turned on further by your words. Smiling wickedly he licked his lips and lowered himself between your thighs kissing the inside of one before placing a chaste kiss on your covered core making you shiver in anticipation. His smirk was covered by your mound as he began to trace the lace patterns on the small piece of fabric separating the two of you making you whimper again you were sure he could probably already feel how wet the fabric had become. His teasing continued as he unbuttoned his dress shirt stopping only for him to toss the garment behind him and pull your underwear aside his tongue gliding through your drenched folds earning you the pleasure of a deep groan falling from him before he swiped his tongue through them again collecting your essence and began eating you out as though it was going to keep him from from dying of thirst. Your whines and soft moans spurred him on as went between kitten lick to your clit and long dragging figure eights that drove you insane reaching down you grab a handful of his hair to ground yourself and making him groan loudly against you the vibrations sending you into an unexpected orgasm with a loud sob of his name.

“You taste delicious baby” he teased, moving away from your sensitive core, his angelic face covered in your arousal making him look like he had fallen from grace and straight into your bed. “Can’t wait to feel you fall apart around me baby”.

Standing from the bed he began to undo his belt, removing it slowly his pants and boxers following abandoned where they fell he leaned in to pull your now very wet underwear down your legs before climbing back over you to kiss you, his rock hard cock pressing against your thigh. He ran his hands up and down your sides making sure you were relaxed again he kissed you softly giving you time to come back down from your high to not push you too fast you could taste yourself on his lips and tongue making the knot in your abdomen begin to tighten again.

“Lix” you whispered cupping his face softly as he pulled himself away from you slightly to look into your eyes “I want to feel you, please” you soft pleading making his eyes widen and genuine look of adoration cross his features.

“God you are everything I could have ever dreamt of” he breathed almost inaudibly allowing his length to slip between your thighs coating himself in your juices “I need you to tell me you want this”.

“Please Felix, I need you” you pleaded again the desperation in your voice showing through making him nod pecking your lips gently as he continued to coat himself in your juices, the head of his cock brushing your clit and making you gasp loudly. Slowly rutting against you he finally lined himself up at your entrance and began leisurely pushing himself inside your still fluttering hole.

“Fuck you feel amazing baby” he groaned bottoming out inside your plush walls before gradually pulling himself out and sinking back into you again. You had never felt so full his dick stretching you to the point you felt like you were being split in half, the pleasure tinged with pain bringing tears to your waterline. 

“Lix…ngh…ah” you moaned uncontrollably each snap of his hips making you feel utter blissful pleasure. Taking his time Felix unhurried pace was leaving you feeling almost drunk as he leant his forehead against yours sweetly humming every time you loudly moaned his name. You met each of his thrusts, your hips rolling against his.

“You’re breathtaking like this” he whispered, increasing the strength of his movements “like you were made just for me” he groaned as you clenched at his words.

“Just for you Lix, only for you” you babbled as white hot sparks spread through your veins making tears fall from your eyes running down your temples into your hair. You were sure Felix could feel your body tightening below you as he moved one hand to wrap your leg around his waist giving him the ability to go even deeper than before, his cock head almost kissing your cervix making you cry out.

“That’s it baby” he purred, burying his face into your neck to kiss and suck on your skin pushing you to the edge again.

“Felix!” you screamed convulsing around his length as your entire body shook and your vision went white, his name tumbling from your lips again and again like a prayer. Felix continued his pace helping to prolong your ecstasy only stopping when you felt him fill you with his thick warm seed. 

Felix peppered your face with sweet kisses as he carefully pulled his softening dick from you, pulling you into his arms as he lay beside you stroking your skin softly until you returned from the fog of pleasure that was currently filling your head. After a few moments he began to massage your thigh easing the muscles that had so tightly squeezed him.

“Is that what it is always like?” you rasped looking up at him with still watering eyes.

“It’s never like, not for clients” he admitted pulling up the blankets to cover your sweat sheen covered bodies. “But for you it would always be like that”.

Felix held you tightly letting your body recover, allowing you to doze off in his arms for a few minutes. When you woke he was wearing a silk robe tied tightly at the waist and was hanging up both your dress and his suit in an empty wardrobe.

“Lix?” you questioned softly sitting up and letting the blankets fall away from your still naked form.

“I didn’t want to wake you baby, you needed to rest” he chuckled quietly, bringing you a glass of water and another glass of wine, climbing into the bed beside you.

“What happens now?” you asked, sipping from the glass of water before allowing Felix to wrap you back up in his arms.

“That is up to you” he conceded, his voice tinged with nervousness.

“Did you want this to be more than tonight?” you continued hoping that you had understood him correctly “Do you want me?”.

“So much, I never expected to meet anyone like you” he confessed “I’ve not been interested in anyone for such a long time that I just thought it wasn’t going to happen ever. But then you appeared and I couldn’t help it, I want to try to make it work with you if you will let me”.

“How would it work though? You here every night and me at work every day we would be like ships passing in the night” you sighed trying to think of what sort of schedule would actually work for the both of you.

“So your first concern isn’t that I make my living like this, it's my hours that are the issue?” he chuckled looking at you with disbelief.

“Well, I mean…. Look Lix I know what you do, and I know you have been doing it for years so it isn’t fair for me to just demand you change your life for me when we don’t even know each other that well” you exhaled looking up at his face.

“The others were right, your honesty is insanely attractive” Felix hummed, placing a soft kiss against your forehead. “But I am willing to go back to just hosting and not escorting if it means I get a shot with you”.

“Have I not been obvious enough?” you giggled your fingers drawing patterns on his beautiful honey skin “I thought you could read women like a book?”.

“Women yes, you no” he groaned, his muscles twitching under your gentle ministrations.

“I like you a lot Felix” you whispered your hand sliding lower brushing his warm skin and eventually wrapping around his half hard cock. “I want to be with you”.

Felix tilted your head with his fingertips connecting his lips to yours in a long kiss that he only broke when the gradual pumping of your hand made him hiss in pleasure.

“I will never stop worshiping you baby, especially now you are mine” His breath fanned across your face and he rolled you back under him grinning devilishly once more.

a/n: Thank you for reading you beautiful people, all your likes reblogs and comments are adored and I hope you enjoyed this one even though it is a bit of an epic. Thank you again to everyone that has followed me and left messages of love and encouragement for me you are amazing xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz @armystay89 @damnyouficc @roamingpolar @tara-skyhold @bakedlilgoonie @krishastumblernow @mrsseals16 @fawnpeaks @leeknowinggg @uno7 @tanzen-ist-gold

[seungvocado]

Break Ground [Part 1]

υ´• ﻌ •`υ — Pairing: Seungmin x Reader

υ´• ﻌ •`υ — Content/Trigger warning: Step brother!Seungmin, Step sister!Reader, Fem!Reader, Slow burn, Slight angst, First time/Virginity taking, Kind of Cheating (?), Oral (F. Receiving, M. Receiving), Fingering, Hand Job, Grinding, P in V sex (unprotected), Creampie, Possessive Seungmin, Jealous Seungmin. [Let me know if I miss out any!]

υ´• ﻌ •`υ — Sypnosis: Y/N who is secretly in love with her Seungmin - even before they were step-siblings, navigates the complexities of their relationship. Unspoken feelings escalates when she dates another boy to distract herself from Seungmin.

υ´• ﻌ •`υ — Master list - Break Ground (mini series)

υ´• ﻌ •`υ — 18+ work! MDNI! Ageless/blank blogs will be blocked, put an indicator on your blog somewhere that you are 18+ before interacting with this work/blog.

a/n: this is my first writing ever! please give me feedback + suggestions! ❤️

The warm summer air drifted through the open windows of the house, carrying with it the scent of freshly cut grass and blooming flowers. Y/N sat on the window seat, gazing outside but not really seeing anything. Her mind was occupied, tangled in thoughts of Seungmin. He had always been the responsible older brother, always there for her since their parents had remarried and brought them together. But recently, something had changed. She could feel it in the way his gaze lingered on her a second longer than it should, the way his touch sent shivers down her spine.

Y/N wasn’t naive; she knew her feelings for Seungmin were more than just sisterly affection. She had fallen for him, hard. But what tormented her the most was the certainty that Seungmin felt the same way. He was just too good at hiding it, too good at pretending that he only cared for her as an older brother should.

She had tried to break through his facade more times than she could count. Casual touches, lingering hugs, the way she looked at him when she thought he wasn’t paying attention. But Seungmin was always careful, always keeping his distance just enough to maintain the illusion of brotherly love and nothing more.

Yet, Y/N could see through him. The way his breath hitched when she was close, the slight tremor in his hand when she touched him, the way his eyes darkened with something she couldn’t quite name when their gazes locked. She knew Seungmin was hiding his true feelings, and it drove her mad with both frustration and longing.

One evening, as the sun dipped low in the sky, painting the world in hues of orange and pink, Y/N decided she couldn’t take it anymore. She found Seungmin in his room, reading as usual. His glasses perched on his nose, hair slightly tousled as if he had run his hand through it out of habit. He looked up as she entered, a small smile playing on his lips.

“Y/N, what’s up? Do you need something?” he asked, his voice as calm and controlled as ever.

She crossed the room, her heart pounding in her chest, and sat on the edge of his bed. “Seungmin, can we talk?”

He set the book aside, giving her his full attention. “Of course. What’s on your mind?”

She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. “I feel like… like there’s something between us. Something more than just… sibling affection.”

For a brief moment, she saw a flicker of something in Seungmin’s eyes—fear, maybe, or perhaps desire. But just as quickly, it was gone, replaced by that calm, composed mask he always wore around her.

“Y/N,” he began, his voice gentle but firm. “You’re my sister, my responsibility. It’s my job to take care of you, to make sure you’re happy and safe. That’s all.”

She shook her head, frustration bubbling up inside her. “No, Seungmin. I know you care about me, but I also know it’s more than just responsibility. You can’t lie to me forever.”

He looked away, his jaw tightening. “Y/N, this… whatever you’re feeling, it’s just confusion. We’re family now, and it’s natural to feel close to each other. But that’s all it is.”

“Is it?” she challenged, moving closer to him. “Because it doesn’t feel like that to me. And I don’t think it feels that way to you either.”

Seungmin stood up, creating distance between them as if he was afraid of what might happen if he didn’t. “Y/N, this is dangerous. We can’t… we can’t go there.”

“Why not?” she demanded, standing as well, refusing to let him escape. “Why can’t we be honest about how we feel?”

“Because it’s wrong!” he burst out, finally letting some of the emotion he’d been holding back spill over. “You’re my sister, Y/N. We can’t—” He stopped, taking a deep breath, trying to regain control. “I can’t let myself feel that way about you.”

“But you do,” she said quietly, stepping closer to him once more. “Don’t you?”

Seungmin’s resolve wavered. He looked at her, really looked at her, and for a moment, the mask slipped. The love, the desire, the guilt—all of it was there, clear as day in his eyes.

But then, with a visible effort, he forced it all back down, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “But I can’t.”

Y/N’s heart ached at the sight of him struggling so hard against his own feelings. She knew he was trying to protect them both, trying to do what he thought was right. But she also knew that denying what they felt was tearing him apart just as much as it was her.

“Seungmin,” she said softly, reaching out to touch his arm. “You don’t have to pretend anymore. It’s okay to admit it… even if we don’t act on it, even if we decide it’s too complicated, too difficult. But you don’t have to keep pretending it isn’t there.”

He closed his eyes, her words cutting through his defenses like a knife. “I’m sorry,” he repeated, pulling away from her touch. “I just… I can’t.”

With that, he left the room, leaving Y/N standing there, her heart heavy with both sorrow and hope. She knew it would take time, that Seungmin might never fully allow himself to acknowledge the truth. But she also knew that the facade he was trying so hard to maintain was crumbling, bit by bit.

And one day, she hoped, he would finally let it fall.

υ´• ﻌ •`υ

[changbeansss]

Echos of us

Pairings: Han Jisung x reader

Genre: fluff, slow burn romance, neighbours au

Warnings: None

A/n: I was inspired by the song 'when we are together' by The 1975 hehe

You’d always been one to cherish the quiet moments in life—the soft hum of city traffic at dawn, the gentle rustling of leaves in the park, the soothing melody of your favorite songs playing in the background. Your life was a tapestry of these simple pleasures, and you were content. Then Han Jisung walked into your life, and suddenly, your world was filled with a new kind of music.

Jisung was your neighbor, living just down the hall in your apartment building. You had exchanged polite greetings and occasional small talk in the elevator, but it wasn't until the building's power went out one stormy evening that you truly connected.

You were fumbling with your keys, the hallway eerily dark, when Jisung appeared with a flashlight. "Need some help?" he asked, his voice warm and reassuring.

"That would be great, thanks," you replied, relieved to have some light.

He held the flashlight steady as you unlocked your door. "Do you want to come in for a bit?" you offered, not wanting to be alone in the dark. "I have candles and some snacks."

Jisung smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "I'd love to."

You spent that evening together, sitting on your living room floor surrounded by flickering candles, sharing stories and laughter. Jisung had a way of making you feel comfortable, his easygoing nature and quick wit putting you at ease. You discovered that you had a lot in common, from your taste in music to your love for quiet, introspective moments.

Over the next few months, your friendship deepened. You started meeting up regularly, exploring the city, going to concerts, and spending lazy afternoons in coffee shops. There was a slow, steady rhythm to your interactions, a gentle progression that felt natural and unforced.

One crisp autumn evening, you and Jisung found yourselves at a small, intimate concert. The band was playing "When We Are Together" by The 1975, and as the familiar lyrics filled the room, you felt a wave of emotions wash over you.

"You know," Jisung said softly, leaning closer so you could hear him over the music, "this song reminds me of us."

Your heart skipped a beat. "What do you mean?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

He smiled, his eyes locking with yours. "It's about finding happiness in the simplest moments, about being together and feeling like that's enough. That's how I feel when I'm with you."

You felt your cheeks flush, the warmth of his words spreading through you. "I feel the same way," you admitted, your voice trembling with emotion.

As the song played on, you both fell silent, lost in the music and the unspoken feelings between you. It was a slow burn, a gentle unfolding of emotions that had been building for months.

One evening, as winter began to set in, you and Jisung were walking through the park, the ground covered in a thin layer of snow. The air was crisp, your breath visible in the cold.

Jisung stopped and turned to you, his expression serious yet tender. "There's something I need to tell you," he said, his voice steady but filled with emotion.

You felt your heart race, the anticipation building. "What is it?"

He took a deep breath, his eyes searching yours. "I've fallen in love with you," he confessed, his voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't want to rush things, but I can't keep it to myself any longer."

Your heart swelled with joy and relief. "I've fallen in love with you too, Jisung," you replied, your voice trembling with emotion. "I was afraid to say anything because I didn't want to ruin what we have."

Jisung's face lit up with a smile, his eyes sparkling with happiness. "You could never ruin this," he said softly, taking your hands in his. "This is just the beginning."

As you stood there, hand in hand, you felt a sense of contentment and excitement for the future. You knew that your relationship with Jisung was built on a foundation of genuine connection and mutual respect. It was a slow burn, a love that had grown and deepened over time, and you were ready to embrace it fully.

"When We Are Together" played softly in your mind, the lyrics resonating with the journey you had taken together. In a world that often moved too fast, you had found a love that was patient, steady, and true. And in that moment, you knew that as long as you were together, everything else would fall into place.

[snwycde]

Connected (Bang Chan) part 2

Pairing: BangChan x fem reader

wc: 2.2k

warnings: none

summary: angsty - slow burn of Chan and fem reader. Chan runs into his past, how will it affect the present and his future?

This is NOT the first part!!! Here is part 1

-----

“Hyung, what do you mean you’re going to make a new solo song?!” Han sits up from the couch, “Would the company even allow that? We’re supposed to release this album literally this year.”

Chan leans back into his chair and grabs at his hair, “I just don’t feel like my song is as…it just doesn’t fit the vibe that I want it to give.”

Han put his hands onto his face, clearly stressed. 

“Why don’t you like ‘Roads’?” Changbin swivels his chair around to look at Chan, “I think it’s good and the lyrics are good?”

‘Roads’ was Chan’s song that he wrote for stays, it’s his solo song in the SKZ-Replay album. 

“I just don’t feel like I spent as much time on the song as you guys did with yours. Literally everyone has deeper meaning to their own songs, even Lino!”

Han looks up and turns to Changbin, “He has a point there. Lee know hyung isn’t one to be emotional and then he literally wrote 나지막이 (limbo).“

“Besides, the company will probably allow me to change it, it’s only June and we’re releasing it in December.” Chan sits back up, “And I’ll just release ‘Roads’ if I don’t come up with anything.”

Han shrugs at Changbin. Now it’s Changbin’s turn to lean back into his chair, “Why not. It’s not like we’re going to be able to change your mind.”

Chan starts packing up his things, “Good.”

“Where are you going?” Han questions his sudden movements.

“We’re done here… so I’m going?” he says as he places his laptop into his bag.

Another shared glance between Han and Changbin, a state of confusement since their hyung is never first to leave. 

“Look I’ll meet you guys back at the dorm.” giving a peace sign before exiting the room, leaving Han and Changbin baffled.

----

You have arrived, announces the car’s GPS. 

Chan parks on the street outside of a building, Connections, a cafe. Chan looks at the outside before entering, he hasn’t been here in years. 

----

“Yeah, I’m gonna surprise him at the ice skating rink,” You say while getting in the car, “He doesn’t know that I came back during spring break.”

“I can’t believe you flew back for him, don’t you ever learn your lesson,” your friend announces after your phone connects to your car.

“Look it’s been rough between us for a while and I want to clear things up, I feel like we just need to see each other and things will go back to normal.” You turn on the car, “Jihyo, I know you’ve never liked him but you didn’t even give him a chance!”

You can hear a sigh on the end of the line, “Whatever babe, I love you. I’ll be back home later tonight.”

You return an I love you and end the call.

----

“How long do you want to pay for?” an employee asks.

You check your watch, 11:30am, “I’ll stay for 2 hours.” 

As you sit down and put on your skates you check your phone to see your boyfriend’s location, he’s been here for 30 minutes already.

You remember he said that he was planning on going ice skating with his friends today when you had called him last night, and since you didn’t know how to surprise him, why not here while he’s with his friends…?

The ice skating rink is filled with people, so you look before getting on the ice to see if you can see your boyfriend. You see him, wearing one of the jackets you had bought him, and warmth rushes to your cheeks. 

As you step onto the ice you start towards him, the rink is quite large so you decide to call out to him, “Jae-”

You stop yourself once you see someone slide into him. A girl. Maybe it’s just an accident, you tell yourself. Jaebum, your boyfriend, wraps his arms around her, hugging her. You stop skating towards him, watching from a distance as he laughs and kisses her forehead. 

Your heart stops, as your eyes follow the girl as she gets off the rink and walks towards the restroom. 

You don’t even realize you're following her until, “Your hair is so cute!”, you say. 

“Ah, thank you!” the girl blushes as she touches up her short black hair in the mirror, “I love your long hair, it's gorgeous!”

“You and your boyfriend look so cute together,” you take out your lip oil, what am I doing?

The girl notices your lip oil, “Omg I have that one too!” as she takes out the dior lip oil to show you, “yeah, he’s actually not my boyfriend…yet!”

You turn to her, heart breaking since she’s so sweet, “oh really?”, from your intuition, you know she doesn’t know you, she seems like a good girl.

“He’s taken me on a few dates here and there, but I haven’t decided if I want him to be my boyfriend,” she leans in to whisper, “he is just a bit older than me, haha.”

You pretend like you don’t know that and gasp, “Omg how old is he, how old are you?”

“He's only 3 years older than me, I’m 24.” she smiles.

“Me too!” you exclaim, suddenly all you want to do is scream at Jaebum.

“Well it was wonderful meeting you!” you say before waving bye and quickly exiting. 

You spot Jaebum on the ice talking to one of his friends. As you get on the ice, his friend spots you before he could, “Y-Y/n?”

Jaebum turns around, color slowly leaves his face, “Y-y/n! What are you doing here!” He pretends to act excited as he looks around. 

“Surprise!” you act, forcing your whole body to hug him back when he hugs you, it makes you want to throw up. 

“What are you doing here?” he asks again breathlessly, “shouldn’t you be overseas?”

“Wouldn’t you like that,” you say under your breath before looking up at him, “Jagi, you’re wearing the jacket I got you! It looks so good!”

As you pretend to check him out in his jacket he starts to panic, “Aren’t you tired? You’re probably tired, you should go home and rest. I’ll bring dinner tonight!”

You stop and hold his hand, “omg jagi, I was in the restroom and I met the sweetest girl! You have to meet her.”

At that moment whatever color was left on his face left, it looked like his soul left his body, “jagi,” he starts, you wince at the nickname.

“Jaebum?” The voice behind you makes you smile.

You turn and look at the girl, on her face is pure confusement, you see her look at you holding his hand. Jaebum quickly wiggles his hand out of yours, your heart breaks a little. 

“Miyeon-ah.” Jaebum takes place in between you both, “Look, I can explain.”

“Miyeon… what a cute name,” you sadly smile before looking at Jaebum, “I saw you hold her.”

“J-jagi, I didn’t mean it,” Jaebum puts his hands up.

“Jagi?” Miyeon questions, her face trying to put the pieces together, “Are you guys dating?”

You look at Jaebum waiting for him to answer her but he just stays silent, “Jaebum was my boyfriend.”

“Was?” Jaebum looks at you, but you’re still looking at Miyeon as she realizes the situation. 

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t know he was in a relationship.” Miyeon’s face drops, “I should leave.”

“No don’t,” Jaebum then turns to her, “can I explain?”

“Please don’t, you have nothing to explain to me.”  Miyeon replies before she waves to you and skates off.

Jaebum just watches her leave, “Y/n, I didn’t mean it, we were just good friends.”

You scoff at his words. You see his friend Jackson turn away not even believing him because he’s clearly in the wrong.

“How long?” That's all you wanted to ask, that’s all you wanted to know, maybe.

“Y/n please.” Jaebum takes your hands into his.

“How long, Jaebum.”

“I only took her on 5 dates. It started in June. It’s only been a month.”

“Only?” you look at him slightly hurt, “we’ve been dating for almost year and you’re gonna throw it away to have some fling?”

“I didn’t plan on getting that close to her, Y/n. you have to believe me.” Jaebum waves Jackson off to go elsewhere, “It was just a little lonely for me, you’re all the way overseas doing your stuff and you’re always busy nowadays.”

You pull your hands from his, “you’re blaming you cheating on me being busy?”

“That’s not what I’m trying to say, Jagi. I just want to say I’m sorry and that we can move on from this and grow stronger.” Jaebum holds your shoulders, “I didn’t mean to kiss her, it was always out of stress and loneliness, I just really missed you.”

“Kis– Jaebum don’t touch me.” you step away from him.

Jaebum moves to try to hug you, but his bracelet on his wrist starts going off notifying that his time on the ice is over. 

“Look, do you want to go somewhere else and talk about this? Let’s try not to make a scene.” Jaebum sees Jackson getting off the ice, trying to move towards the exit.

“Make a scene? Seriously.” 

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

You look at Jaebum, then check the time, you still have 45 minutes left before your time is up, “You should go.”

Jaebum looks at you, then his bracelet, “text me whenever you’re ready okay? I love you.”

You cringe at those words, yet watch his back as he heads out to leave in sadness, not wanting him to go.

---

You’re in shock as you skate alone around and around the rink, trying to waste your time. You get a notification from your phone, Jihyo: 

I get off a little late today, so I’ll bring some food home ;P

You decide to text her and tell her what happened, when you hear a voice say, “Bin I’m actually gonna leave you, you’re embarrassing me.”

This wakes you up from your deluded thoughts, and you stare at the two people who happened to be in front of you, one gripping onto the wall and the other, slightly taller than the other, blonde hair peeking out under his beanie. 

“Chan?” you hear yourself whisper.

But you’re completely drowned out by another boy taller than them both coming by to completely push the one gripping onto the wall. As he’s desperately trying not to fall, that's when you hear it. 

Chan’s laugh. The sweetest and most contagious laugh you’ve ever heard, it makes your heart ache yet feel so warm. 

The laugh distracts you from your thoughts so well that it also distracts you from reality, you’re able to snap out of it, when you’re suddenly hit and falling to the ground. 

“Ouch,” you grab onto your wrist that you fell on.

Your nose is suddenly filled with the scent of his cologne, bringing back memories you did not want to feel right now. Feelings starting to worsen your current heartbreak with a past heartbreak.

He starts, as he rushes to get up and off of you, “I'm so sorry. I am truly so sorry.” He stretches out his hand for you, “are you okay?”

Does he not recognize me? You wonder as you start to get up using the wall, “You don’t have to apologize, it’s okay.”

Chan tries to make eye contact with you, “Do you need help or do you need anything?”

This is embarrassing, he’s the exact same as before. His actions start to irritate you, “”N-no, it’s really okay.” 

I’m done here. This is the worst day ever. You’re thinking as you skate off.

You walk and text Jihyo, Jaebum cheated on me and I just literally ran into Chan.

You find your shoes and start taking off your skates. Your phone’s notification starts to go off, thinking it’s from Jihyo you pick it up, instead it’s from Jackson. 

Hey y/n, look I know we’re not the closest, but I just wanted to say that I didn’t know you guys were even dating still. Jaebum told me and the guys that you guys broke up a little after you flew back to the States. I’m sorry that he’s been lying to you. - Jackson

This makes your eyes start to water, you’re not sure whether to be angry, hurt or –

“Hi I’m the guy who fell into you earlier”

5 years Chan, trust me I know you.

“I really am sorry about that, I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

You scoff at his words, they’re so familiar, “You want to make sure I’m okay?”

“Um yes,” hesitation in his voice, “I just want to know if I hurt you badly and you’re just hiding it.”

Hearing this from your ex is not the best feeling. Especially when he doesn’t even remember you, or does he? So you decide to make eye contact with him, feeling pathetic yet angry as you still have tears in your eyes, “No Chan, don’t worry you didn’t hurt me at all.”

His face suddenly drops, from the nice guy act he was playing, as he steps back a little he questions, “Shit, Y/n?”

“Sorry you might’ve forgotten me, my bad.” You stand up and brush his shoulder as you walk out.

author's note: OKAY so I think I'll release every day until this story is done, around 10-11 pm PST time 👍 I'm not entirely sure honestly but I'll try to be active as long as people want more 🙏

[bangchansspicybuldak]

[Teaser] (now available)

Genre: Unrequited Love, Noona-Dongsaeng relationship, Office scenario, Light Angst.

Type: One-shot, Short fanfiction.

Pairing: Yang Jeongin/Reader

Available on: Ao3

User Id: thenightsoftingles

Word count: 2, 765.

──────────────────

"So to counter attack the bug, they did this complex coding known as–Hey! How rude it is to walk away when Hyung is talking— Innie!"

Jeongin ignores Jisung's blabber, but it shakes you out of your miserable looking blankness.

You turn to look at Jeongin's approaching figure, and his mind traces each way your gaze shifts to his body at length, from shoulder to shoulder, to his face, to his blowing hair, to his peaking chest.

"Noona." 

You still seem to be unaware of his attention towards you, because when your gaze flicks from his lips to his eyes, Jeongin notices the sharp intake of air that you took.

He notices, and he shakes in his body to not react to such confusing signs. How foolish you can be to jump your Noona, Jeongin, his mind scolds him.

He turns and simply sit beside you, cherishing what little touch of warmth he can cease from your closeness.

It took him months to sit beside you, for you to be so comfortable with him. It took him months to have just a fragment of his skin to overlap yours (although he pertains to confess falsely that he hates skin ship). It took him months, at stretch, to feel the sea breeze lightly touching your burning cheeks (was Jeongin the reason, he wonders through his sobriety),  to feel it vanish past your pale skin, and Jeongin appears not to be affected of the blowing wind, and especially, not jealous. None at all.

Yet, he caves in. Digging in. Pawing and seeking an opening— any entrance to bloom within your heart. To peak beneath, to feel comforted that you like him back, just as badly as loves you.

──────────────────

Turn to me,

just this once.

──────────────────

[changbins-hot-wife]

Second Time’s A Charmer

a new season has started in london, and the only son of the seolar family, lord changbin seolar, must find a wife. a new wife that is. with his recently deceased wife of only a year out of the picture and no heir in sight, his parents insist he remarry. not too keen on the idea, he’s a reluctant joiner in the merriment of the season.

lady y/n worthington, now in her second season, is resolute in her quest for a true love match. however, as she navigates the social whirl, her family’s expectations and plans threaten to overshadow her own desires.

pairing : seo changbin x fem! reader

genre : slow burn, forbidden love, possible smut?

authors note! : i have been absolutely head over heels in love with the bridgerton series (as i think a lot of people are), and it inspired me to try writing a fic based on the regency era. changbin has my heart and soul, so i found it only fitting that my first ever skz fic be about him <3

- master list-

CHAPTER 1 : the london season is upon us! all eligible bachelors and bachelorettes are in attendance at the first event of the season: The Worthington’s inaugural ball!

CHAPTER 2 : lord changbin’s return to london comes with it a most conflicting whirlwind of emotions. many things are on his mind, too many for him to process at once. mayhaps a distraction is in order.

CHAPTER 3 : as the night carries on, happiness and expectations wage war in y/n’s mind.

[shoulderscars]

Help me out y'all hehe

[lieslab]

Introducing: Forget-me-not

After Cynthia Jones gets into a car accident and loses her memory, she's haunted by dreams of a stranger. He's faceless, sarcastic, and overwhelmingly charming. Without his face and without her memories, there's not much she can do. Haunted by fragments of the past, struggling to remember the present, and terrified of the future; she's forced to uncover secrets from the past that could change everything.

Kim Seungmin is a K-pop idol and when a few sasaengs cause the love of his life to get into a life-altering accident, he's torn. He loves her, but everyone always says if you love them, let them go. Coerced to grapple with the startling new course of his life, with the help of Cynthia's best friend, who only wants the best for Cynthia; he cuts ties with his past lover entirely.

Juggling heartbreak, loss of identity, isolation, and loneliness begs an answer to the question everyone so desperately searches for; if you love someone, should you truly let them go?

_ _ _

Forget-me-not is a full-length fanfic on Wattpad and Ao3.

Contains:

*Dual points of view

*Amnesia

*A toxic friendship

*PTSD

*Depression and loneliness

*An unsolved mystery

*Hurt/comfort

*Seungmin's witty insults and remarks despite everything that's happened

*The rest of SKZ appearing and being themselves

*A slow build romance

*Drama, drama, drama

*Flowers and flower language

*The moon chases the sun

*Loss of self-identity

*Happy ending (unlike the last full length fic)

[skz-fanfic-recs]

i wish i could run away from everything except you by nymphare

chanXfelix

149,814 words

21 chapters

lee felix recently graduated from seoul university, where he moved through university as a gray mouse, unnoticed by everyone. he works as an underpaid it support technician at a firm that doesn't value its employees at all. however, felix endures it. he has to endure it; if not, debt collectors - out to collect his father's debt - will show up at his door demanding money.

every month is a struggle; he barely manages to pay his rent, study debt, and the debt left by his deadbeat father. for felix, a proper meal consists of bread from his favorite corner shop with some off-brand chocolate spread. it does help that fresh cove, the gentrified hell-hole of a grocery store, offers free samples almost every single day!

everything gets a lot worse when felix is forced to find a new job and realizes that the obnoxious rich bastard from fresh cove is his new boss.

who the fuck decided that bang chan, the most annoying person in the entire world, was to be his boss? had it not been for the great salary provided by racha, then felix would have gladly drowned chan in a bucket of boiling hot coffee - though that would ruin his perfectly curled hair and beautiful smile. fuck that shit. felix was furious.

[daceydeath]

Cigarettes and Cliche's Part 11

Pairing: Bad Boy Felix x Reader Word Count: 8.1K Genre: Collage AU, Slow Burn Romance Warnings: 18+, MDNI, Explicit Activity

He was the most impractical guy for you to be interested in the incredibly handsome cliché bad boy who collected girls like trophies. As hard as you wanted to stay away you couldn't even if it might cost you everything and leave you heartbroken you couldn't ignore him.

Felix hadn’t surprised you by helping you get Seungmin and Jeongin back into the apartment and into their own rooms before leaning against the wall across from the kitchen and waiting for you to finish getting out painkillers for the morning.

“Did you hate it?” he asked softly, his eyes scanning you as you made your way over to him.

“No, but it isn’t really my thing” you admitted with a half smile gracing your lips.

“You don’t have to come to them if you don’t want to” he reached out for you pushing you gently against the wall caging you with his body as he cupped your face sweetly.

“I wanted to spend time with you” you chewed on your bottom lip shyly not wanting to admit too much in the first moment his hands were on you.

“I will spend all the time I have left in the world with you” Felix whispered, stroking your hip with his fingertips. You couldn’t help but lean in and press your lips to take him by surprise, softly moving your lips against his before catching his bottom lip between your teeth and tugging it tentatively. The low groan from somewhere in Felix’s chest went straight to your core making you realize that you were probably going a little bit too far for where you currently were standing, only a few feet from your roommate's doors. Felix seemed to sense your tension and easily pulled himself away from you.

“Sorry” you whispered shyly looking up at him through your lashes and nibbling on your lower lip, it was becoming quite a habit for you to push a little bit too far without thinking since it was far too easy to get lost in Felix’s warmth.

“Don’t be baby” he smiled softly, taking your hand and leading you further into the apartment “I should probably let you get ready for bed anyway”.   

“Lix?” you breathed looking at him for a moment as he waited patiently for you to continue “Would you stay? Tonight with me?”. His face lit up as he processed your words; the dazzling grin that grew on his face only made you more sure you wanted him to remain with you for the rest of the night.

“Are you sure you want me to stay baby?” he stared at you as you nodded mutely hoping that you didn’t look like you were unsure. Without another word you took the lead and led him to your room allowing him to step inside and shrug his leather jacket off, leaving it draped over your desk chair as he moved to cup your face again. His lips found yours again the kiss this time far more sensuous his tongue dancing with yours as he explored your mouth as you balled up his slim fitting black shirt in your hands. Backing up towards your bed you let Felix lay you down his hands teasingly ghosting up your thighs and over your skirt to grip your waist while you threaded your fingers through his soft blond locks. His thumb began to draw circles on your bare waist letting your relax yourself more into him so that you didn’t tense up as he began kissing his way across your cheek to your neck his long hair tickling your skin as he went, you could feel his excitement as his half hard member pressed against your thigh making you feel flustered and hot all over at the thought of him getting hard over you.

“I should slow down shouldn’t I?” Felix asked rhetorically, pulling his lips away from the skin of your throat. His hands dragging down your hips to hold you still

“I’m sorry Felix” you whimpered nervously “I’m taking too long aren’t I?” feeling guilt rising in your chest replacing the warmth that had been taking hold just moments before

“No baby, you are allowed to take your time” he breathed resting his forehead against yours “I want to wait until you are comfortable” he kissed your lips chastely moving himself from you and helping you to sit. “Go get changed for bed and I’ll just go steal something from Innie to wear to sleep”. 

You nodded letting him leave you alone in your room frowning at the floor. You didn’t know why you couldn’t go any further than letting Felix kiss you, you trusted him and he obviously cared about you so whatever nerves that were holding you to ransom had to go. Walking into your bathroom you washed your face and got changed into a baggy sleep shirt almost totally covering your mismatched sleep shorts. Slipping into your bed you waited for Felix to return hoping that maybe you would be able to talk it out with him since there was no way you could ask any of the others why you were having nerves about sex when you were now dating a guy they considered a complete whore.

“Cute” he murmured, stepping back into your room now wearing a pair of sweatpants and his t-shirt looking far too attractive than he had any right to.

“Will you cuddle me?” you asked in a small voice not wanting to seem demanding after stopping him from going further with you.

“Of course baby, I’ll hold you all night if I can” he cooed sweetly, turning off the light leaving you both illuminated by the reading lamp beside your bed as he crawled in beside you and pulled you against his chest, his arms wrapping securely around you. “ Night baby”.

“Good night Lixie” you whispered, placing a kiss on his clothed chest.

Your phone ringing woke you up much to your dismay, particularly since you were still securely cradled in Felix’s arms. Opening one eye you reached towards your bedside table grabbing anything that felt like a phone, finding Felix’s, your school lanyard and a coaster before you landed on the ringing device. Blinking at the screen your stomach dropped before you hastily answered.

“Good Morning Mama” you tried to sound as awake as you could so she didn’t suspect she had just woken you at 9:30 in the morning.

“Why did it take you so long to answer the phone?” she demanded sharply, making you frown.

“I was in the bathroom, I couldn’t answer while I was in there mama” you lied hoping that she actually believed it and that the call wouldn't wake Felix and his presence would remain unknown to her.

“Your father and I have decided that you must lift your scores by the end of this semester if you do not wish for us to pull you out of your studies.” She begins to demand the start of her rant that will no doubt just be her berating you for whatever she or your father have seen as a slight despite your unwavering obedience up to this point in your life. “We do not want you to graduate as some mid ranked girl who will not be able to get proper employment because there are others who would be better candidates”.

“Of course mama, you are right if my scores were better my opportunities would be better” you agreed dutifully not realizing that Felix had now rolled over and was looking at you with concern.

“Your father also wants you to return home at some point this semester as you have been away too long, we don’t want city life to rub off on you and ruin what you have achieved so far. Do I make myself clear?” she continued not even acknowledging your reply to her previous demand.

“You may think you are a grown woman but you are not, you are still a selfish and stupid little girl who needs guidance so you will listen to me. I will not have you turning into some little slut who treats her time to get a proper education as some sort of party. I am sure I do not need to remind you what will happen if you disobey the rules for a second time? Although you can be very stupid so maybe I do”    

“No mama, I remember the rules and I will check the semester schedule for the dates of all my assignment dates and exam dates so that I can prepare for that time away from studying” you mumbled ashamed how you could almost feel your scar tingle at the mention of their rules for you. Your mother made a disinterested noise and hung up without saying another word leaving you curling into yourself with insecurities.

“Hey, hey, hey” Felix soothed, his voice rough and deep from his sleep “don’t be upset baby” he sat up and wrapped his arms around your still mostly bare form the warmth of his chest against your back making you almost ache with need for him to make you feel better.

“I’m sorry I woke you up” you mumbled, swallowing the burn in your throat from the shame.

“No baby, I’m sorry that’s what woke you up” Felix frowned, turning you in his arms so he could lay back down with you pressed into his chest “You are so smart, and so beautiful, and so perfect, and you the most incredible woman I have ever met” he continued to try to calm you as your shoulders began to tremble.

“Felix, I can’t go home to them” you muttered, pressing your face into the crook of his neck to hide your shame and the tears that were very close to falling from your eyes.

“I know, I will do everything to keep you away from them” he promised softly, running his hands up your back in long circular motions trying his hardest to distract you. “How about we go get some breakfast?”.

“Alright” you mumbled, letting him continue to hold you until you forced yourself to get up and shower.

Grabbing towels for Felix you left him to check on your probably hung over roommates who you hoped were either still sleeping or were well enough to be able to function on their own. Checking Jeongin’s room you found him half laying on the bed and half on the floor snoring like a chainsaw which at least meant he was still alive. Stepping over his legs you grabbed a black shirt from his wardrobe for Felix to wear if he wanted something clean and made your way into Seungmin’s room. Opening the door quietly you found him struggling with the blister pack of the painkillers.

“Here Seung” you huffed out a silent laugh as he fumbled again before taking the pills from him “I’ll open them and you put them in your mouth yeah?”.

“Please” he slurred a little, his voice still thick with sleep. You dropped the tablets in his hand and watched him take them before flopping back down in his bed.

“I’m going out I’ll be back later” you smiled returning to your room and finding Felix scrolling through his phone his hair still damp from his shower.

“I thought you might want a clean shirt, and both the boys are still alive” you interrupted his eyes flicking up to look at you and the shirt in your hands.

“Thank you baby” he smiled brilliantly, his eyes crinkling as he took the shirt and pulled the t-shirt he had been wearing the night before over his head to slip the clean one on your mouth, almost going dry at the sight of his bare skin. 

“So where are we going?” you blinked owlishly watching a smug smile tug on the corners of his lips.

“That’s a surprise” Felix teased, standing up and taking your hand to lead you out of the apartment and down into the mild morning sunshine. You ended up at a quiet little cafe halfway between your apartment and Felix's. It wasn't too busy and the smell of fresh coffee and pancakes filled the air making your stomach growl the moment you stepped inside the door. Following him to a table Felix pulled your chair out for you and tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear as a waitress delivered menus to you both. Ordering the largest coffee that they made and waffles you sat watching Felix, his hair almost glowing golden in the yellow hue of the overhead light.

“What are you doing tonight?” Felix tilted his head looking amused at your staring.

“I’m going to dinner with Chan, Changbin and Han. We organized it a while ago” you explained “I thought it might be a good way to ask Han about changing programs since Seung said he changed his degree”.

“Did he?” Felix furrowed his brow as though he was trying to remember “but that’s a good idea you at least can find out how he managed it and if it's hard to do”.

“Did you mean it this morning when you said you would do anything to keep me from going home to my parents” you chewed your lips nervously as the food arrived.

“Of course. If we can get the course change done before then you won't have to go back and if you do need to get stuff from your parents house I’ll make sure Minho, Hyunjin and Changbin go with us to get it so they won't have the chance to hurt you”. Felix soothed his voice low so that he wouldn’t be overheard.

“There is nothing there that is important enough for me to go back for Lix” you smiled weakly stabbing at a strawberry with your fork.

“Then you never go back” he shrugged easily, his eyes shining mischievously “If you need to live anywhere else after you graduate you can just move in with me and the morons and we will make it all work out”.

“Felix!” you whisper shouted your cheeks burning.

“Eat baby you need your strength”  Felix laughed, shoving a bite of pancake in his mouth.

Sure enough Seungmin let Chan, Han and Changbin into your apartment a full 20 minutes earlier than when you had arranged for Chan to pick you up. Their voices intermixed with Jeongin and Seungmin’s as they started talking about how the boys had pulled up from the night before. You continued getting dressed pulling a sweater over your head so that you wouldn’t have to worry about the cool night air when you came home. Another round of raucous laughter erupted making you giggle as you fixed your hair and grabbed your bag and coffee mug that you had been drinking out of to return to the kitchen.

“Hi guys” you grinned, stepping out of the room to find Jeongin dramatically flopping down on the couch as Han finished retelling what had happened after he had raced upstairs to find Hyunjin and the twins.

“Hey you ready to go or do you need a bit longer I know we’re early” Chan beamed still chuckling from whatever the story had been.

“Give me maybe two more minutes” you walked past them and into the kitchen to rinse out your mug and place it on the sink to drain. You phone chiming as you wipe your hands dry on the kitchen towel.

Have fun baby, call me if you need anything x

You smiled dopily at your screen not even bothering to try to hide it from Seungmin and Jeongin who proceeded to tease you by making gagging noises.

“Gotta admit I was surprised Lix didn’t tag along” Han pipped up snickering at your roommates theatrics.

“Why would he?” you stopped to look at him confused.

“Ignore him” Changbin groaned, he's just hyper today since he managed to have the night of his life last night.

“Oh I would have thought that you would have been on a low knowing that your life had just peaked” you shrugged smirking.

“This is why you are everyone's favorite” Chan snorted while Han’s jaw dropped in mock offense. 

“Let’s head out I’m sure me and the big guy are hungry” you raised your eyebrows and bumped your shoulder against Changbin’s arm.

“You would be perfect if you just had better taste in men” Changbin teased cheekily “Smart, pretty loves food it's almost the whole package”.

“Well looks like I need to get a new favorite then” you mocked following Chan to the door.

The drive was filled with banter, Changbin pretending that he didn’t care that you had struck him from your favorite list, Han teasing him that he would replace Changbin and Chan begging you not to egg them on any further.

“Actually Han there was something I wanted to ask you” You turned a little more serious as you sat in the booth spinning the menu on the table while you waited for drinks.

“Shoot, you can ask me anything” he nodded looking at you genuinely.

“Seung told me you changed your degree, how did you go about doing that?” your voice remained playful but you could tell all of them could see you were serious.

“You want to get out of accounting? That's amazing” Han smiled his eyes wide “What do you want to change it to and why now?”

“Architecture” you shrugged “and why not change it now I never wanted to be an accountant anyway that was what my parents wanted”.

“Well fuck me I take back what I said before” Changbin whistled “maybe you have excellent taste if Felix can persuade you to actually do what you want in life”.

“Yeah I’m impressed that the idiot is actually having a positive effect for a change” Chan concurred nodding along with Changbin.

“Shut up” you whined covering your face with your hands feeling flustered.

“All I did was go to the administration and ask about changing my degree and how fast I could do it. I’m not sure if it would be the same as you because I had only completed like half of my first semester so it was still relatively quick in the scheme of things” Han explained “I also don’t have a scholarship but that is surely something that could be transferred you are a top tier student so they wouldn’t want you to change universities”. You nodded humming in agreement as you nibbled on the fries that had just arrived.

“How are you going to break it to your parents?” Chan asked, suddenly very serious.

“The thing is I’m not going to tell them unless I actually have to” you admitted shyly, taking a large sip of your drink. “I want it to be done and dusted before they know so it will be too late for them to interfere”.

“What about the agreement that they pay for the costs that the scholarship doesn't cover?” Chan pressed, looking every bit the responsible older brother that you didn’t have.

“I will either have to apply for aid or work more, I could change jobs to work more hours I think I will be able to manage it” you continued seeing his face relax as he absorbed your answer.

“Well I think it’s worth it” Changbin grinned, wrapping his arm around you and squashing you against him.

“I didn’t realize how much I was missing in life doing what they wanted to keep them happy. I guess that is partly your fault for being so friendly and including me. I didn't have friends before I moved in with my pair of idiots, just Nali, so I didn’t know what I was missing out on”. You bit your bottom lip not wanting to get too sentimental on them.

“You are so cute” Han cooed looking at you like you were some kind of puppy that was trying to lick him.

“Yep, that’s why Seung and Innie didn’t want to share” Chan rolled his eyes at Han punching his shoulder softly.

You ate until you felt like you were going to burst, easily slipping between teasing the boys about stupid things that they had said or done in the last few weeks, making all the worries that you had been feeling about your parents melt away. You knew that you would have to deal with them eventually but Han had given you hope that maybe it wouldn’t be a long dragged out process and that you would be able to achieve it without having to wait until the end of the year. By the time Chan had dropped you home the sheer amount of food was making you sleepy so you waved sleepily to Seungmin and Jeongin and went to be after sending Felix a text telling him you were home and fine and that you would talk to him later.

Sleep had come easily but unfortunately your body also decided to wake you up far too early to make up for the fact you had slept early which left you groaning in annoyance at the still dark sky outside of your window. After tossing and turning for another 20 minutes you decided to just bite the bullet and get up. Maybe you could study or look into following up the enquiry you had sent to the university about changing your course and how exactly student aid worked. Opening your laptop you scrolled through their website looking for a contact name or email which would be able to help you out. When you finally opened your emails you noticed that someone in the admissions department had replied to your query giving you an option to see someone in person later in the day or the Friday before the start of the next semester block. Replying excitedly you asked for later in the afternoon hoping you would be able to talk either Felix, Seungmin or Jeongin into going with you.

Getting back to your research you began to try figuring out the scholarship issue and how to apply for the student aid so that you could have some understanding of what would happen as you turned your entire life on its head.

Hi Lix, are you busy today?

You typed knowing that it was probably far too early for him to be awake but that he would respond eventually. Making your coffee as quietly as you could to not disturb Seungmin or Jeongin wasn't easy especially since you wanted it iced and the ice maker sounded like it was bashing a glacier with a hammer to get it for you but you managed it. You opened the blinds and just sat watching the first rays of the sunlight begin to reflect off the high rise windows making the city look like it was bathed in a pretty amber glow. Sipping and sitting in silence you wondered how exactly your life had changed so much. How did one Nali hooking up with Felix continuously turn into you living with Seungmin and Jeongin while now dating Felix? Was it all decided by the fates or was it just a series of crappy events that all came with silver linings that eventually lead you to a discovery that life could and would be better if you stepped out of the shadow of what was expected for you. How much different would your life have been if you didn't bend to their wills like you had for most of your life?

"You're up too early" Jeongin sighed quietly, shaking you from your spiraling thoughts.

"So are you" you countered softly, smirking at him as he made his own coffee.

"I didn't sleep well" Jeongin shrugged, coming to join you as the sun continued to reflect light around you "What's your excuse?".

"Don't have one, what are you doing today?" you smiled crookedly as Jeongin chugged his coffee.

"Nothing much, why what's up? Did you need help with something?" He frowned slightly obviously expecting something less than ideal.

"I have a meeting today with the admissions department, I have asked Felix but if he is busy would you come with me?" you tried to sound flippant but you knew he was going to see straight through your attempt at nonchalance.

"Absolutely! Shit I'll go even if Felix goes with you so we can hype you up to do whatever it is that you need to do" he grinned toothily looking genuinely happy for you "Your like a totally different person now and Seung and I think it's incredible".

"Thanks Innie" you mumbled looking out the window again to hide your face in case you started tearing up.

"I mean it, I'm proud of you and so is Seung plus Felix would agree with me" he laughed watching you rub your nose as stealthily as you could.

"Am I interrupting some kind of heart to heart lovefest?" Seungmin laughed as he wandered out of the hallway.

"Nah, just a small celebration of our dear roommates' courage," Jeongin smirked before poking his tongue out at you. 

"Do I need to order a celebratory breakfast?" Seungmin grinned brightly as you rolled your eyes at them both the teasing not bothering you but making you squirm.

"I will always take a free meal" you smugly replied, dissolving into your own fit of giggles as you took in their fond expressions.

"I'm only buying if this isn't about you fucking Felix though" Seungmin sniggered making your jaw drop in surprise.

"Kim Seungmin!" You yelped horrified.

"As if I would be congratulating her on that" Jeongin rolled his eyes "I'd be making an appointment at the clinic to make sure she hadn't caught anything".

"Yang Jeongin!" You squawked, shocked at them both.

"Kidding, kidding" Seungmin laughed while getting out his phone "what did you want to eat?".

“You are both arseholes” you groaned, pouting.

Felix had gotten back to you an hour or so later and had jumped at the chance to go with you to the meeting even though he was going to have to share your attention with Jeongin who was adamant that he was going as well because he was your friend first and he had asked you first. Dressing yourself in your black skirt and a white shirt and blazer you tried to look more the chic student then you ever usually would hoping that a good impression and good grades would help the transfer along. The trip into the main university offices was far less daunting this time around with now need to defend yourself and no embarrassing questions and tests that need to be done. You felt far more comfortable although that changed the closer to your appointment time you got. Jeongin tried his best to distract you telling you silly stories about Seungmin and the man whores while Felix rubbed his thumb across your knuckles not saying a word about how hard you were gripping his fingers as your nerves grew with each tick of the clock. 

“Miss Choi?” A tall friendly looking woman stepped towards you with a small stack of files in her arms as she looked at you expectantly.

“Yes” you stuttered standing up and letting go of Felix's hand which you had been tightly gripping for the past ten minutes at least.

“If you would like to follow me we can start discussing what it is we can do for you” she smiled gesturing for you to follow her “It usually takes a little while did you want your friends to come with us?”.

“Please” you nodded, walking towards her as Jeongin and Felix quickly followed the pair of you down the hallway to her office.

“Take a seat” she smiled again, placing down the files and opening up something on her computer. “I have looked over your request to change departments and it is possible but you would be needing to start at the beginning which even with the small amount of crossover between your course now and the Architecture program you would be looking at an additional 2 years being added to your time here which would not be covered by your scholarship. We can, of course, offer you the opportunity to receive a scholarship to cover the final two years since you fall within the parameters of the regional student assistance”.

“Oh, I would be willing to commit to the extra years. Especially if I can attempt to get some assistance” you agreed, chewing your cheek while you thought.

“Are there any credits that can be moved from her current course to the new one?” Jeongin pondered frowning slightly.

“Well yes, the mathematical parts of the course can be credited but that would still only give her 10 credits out of 60”. She explained sympathetically. “Although there are two large course blocks that are due to be credited in the next few weeks, they could very well increase this depending on her scores”.

“Will her scholarship be able to be transferred between departments without having to change any of the financial aspects being changed?” Felix probed his eyes turning serious as the admissions clerk clicked through a few different screens to look into it.

“Yes, absolutely this scholarship is not course dependent so it will not change” she nodded still peering at her screen.

“Am I able to attend online or summer courses to shorten the length of the course?” you asked bluntly, still calculating how long you could swing not having your parents become aware of the change.

“I’m not sure but I can check with the professors in that department if you wanted to do that you could probably get through the course faster unless you were wanting to do a double degree in which case that might not be possible”. She continued politely “Should I put through the application? Since it is a touch last minute we should be able to find out if you are successful fairly quickly. Architecture has not been as popular a department for a few years as most students veer towards the engineering side”.

“Yes please. I would like to find out as soon as possible so I can still make the mid year intake” you grinned feeling Felix squeeze your hand softly in encouragement.

Stepping back out into the golden glow of the late afternoon sunlight mixed feelings settling in your stomach on one hand you felt relieved that your scholarship would be secure for a few years at least and you would be able to perhaps get another one if you needed. On the other you would be adding years to your study time and ran the risk of your parents discovering that you had changed your degree but you had made a start in trying to live your life for yourself which was liberating in a way you hadn’t expected.

“Do you want to grab dinner, baby?” Felix smiled brightly tugging you a little closer to him and kissing your temple.

“I would love that” you sighed, the total relief obvious in your voice.

“God you being all boyfriendy is fucking weird” Jeongin scrunched up him nose in mock disgust making Felix laugh loudly at him.

“I mean I didn’t ask you mate” Felix chuckled “but you can have a kiss too if you feel left out”.

“Nope, I’m out I’ll see you two later” Jeongin shouted walking away leaving you alone with Felix.

“Did you want to come back to mine and we can order in and just watch movies?” Felix wrapped his arm around your waist guiding you forward.

“Sure sounds good but what about Minho and Hyunjin?” you mused letting him press you closely to his side, this was the first time he had openly staked his claim as your boyfriend in the light of day which made you a little giddy with happiness. 

“They can have dinner with us and then I can suggest they go out if you want” Felix teased suggestively squeezing your waist playfully. You let the giggle that was bubbling in your chest out, feeling yourself relax in his embrace while you walked in sync ignoring the looks that you knew were being thrown at you as you passed other students that you knew were familiar with Felix at least. The walk back to his apartment was comfortably easy, enjoying the warmer weather and not having to hide anything made it feel natural.

“So are you going on a date with one of the twins or both?” Minho’s loud voice filled the hall as you stepped into Felix’s apartment, slipping your shoes off before wandering towards the sound.

“Well… Han is coming too so I guess only one but we will see who puts out for who” Hyunjin shrugged as you stepped into the main living area.

“Woah” Minho’s eyes widened when he clocked you.

“You knew I hooked up with them, why is that surprising?” Hyunjin sighed, sounding miffed that Minho had already forgotten the details.

“Hi Minho, Hyunjin” you greeted, walking between them and sitting down on the couch while Felix grabbed you a drink from the fridge.

“I beg your fucking pardon?” Hyunjin yelped and blinked at you.

“I said hi…” you snickered hearing Felix’s deep laugh from the kitchen.

“So you're here. In the apartment. With Lix” Hyunjin listed on his fingers as though he was unable to process this new information.

“Yes. You know I have been here before right?” you laughed as Felix lightly whacked the back of he head as he passed handing you a glass of water.

 “Hold up, when were you here?” Minho turned abruptly to look at you confused.

“Well last time was after work and the time before I fell asleep waiting for the rain to stop so i accidentally stayed over” you shrugged sipping slowly.

“Your fucking kidding. It was her that was here that morning!” Hyunjin rounded on Felix in awe.

“Yeah you two doubted me so I never confirmed anything” Lix smirked running his tongue across his upper teeth.

“Anyway we were going to order in if you were sticking around but I don’t want to interrupt you figuring out which twin your hooking up with” you sighed nonchalantly as possible “Also don’t want to let Hannie down since he was so excited to help you out last time”,

“I’m staying in tonight” Minho purred silkily, sitting on the couch near you.

“Of fucking course you are” Felix rolled his eyes.

“Well someone should chaperone you who knows what advantage you might take of such an innocent girl” he stated in faux honor.

“Oh of course Minho I totally trust a man whore to keep my virtue intact” you snorted trying hard not to roll your eyes at the irony.

Hyunjin left to get ready, taking almost twice as long as Jeongin, which confirmed your original suspicions that they were putting in far more effort to look cool than anyone thought. When he emerged in a tight white shirt and baggy black jeans you wondered how exactly it had taken so long to pick two items until he started putting on his necklaces and rings accessorizing each one with his belt like some sort of catwalk model in a fashion show. With him out of the way now it was just Minho’s teasing that you had to contend with.

“I actually wanted to say something to you” Minho started clearing his throat softly.

“Oh?” you pursed your lips unsure what he was going to say.

“I wanted to apologize, properly, for the whole Nali thing” he started a sheepish look crossing his sharp features.

“Minho, really it’s alright you don't need to apologize for her being a psycho cunt” you reassured him with your brows drawing together in surprise.

“Not for the whole video and the lying and shit but for you having to find somewhere else to live, messing up your grades and just making it hard for you” he continued meeting you eyes to try to show you that he was being genuine and honest.

“I know Minho, you never set out to get me kicked out of my room in the middle of the night, none of you did and I don’t blame that on you anyway. It worked out better for me really. Living with Innie and Seung has been fun”. You leant over and placed your hand on his knee “The psycho bit was at least 85% Nali’s fault and 15% Felix’s”  Minho grinned wickedly at you as Felix protested beside you “Alright 90% Nali’s fault, 9% Felix and 1% me at the wrong place and time” you conceded leaning back into Felix who just pretended to sulk.

“Annoyingly you two are really good together” Minho screwed up his nose “We both thought that he was too much of a whore and you were too much of a teachers pet for this to actually work but you have snapped him out of it and he’s brought out your claws”.

“Thanks Min” Felix muttered behind you looking over your head at his friend.

“But that’s enough domestic bliss for me I’m out, I’ve got to work twice as hard now that we are the whore duo not trio” Minho waggled his eyebrows before walking towards the hallway “Don’t knock her up Lixie”.

“Cunt” Felix yelled after him amused.

“Should we watch a movie?” you hummed leaning your head back against his shoulder “or did you want to get food now and movie later?”.

“Let’s go get comfy and watch something I’ll order so the food gets here after it’s finished” Felix smiled softly.

“Are you sure this isn’t just an excuse to get me in your bed again” you needled cheekily.

“Maybe it is, maybe it isn’t I’ll never answer” he waggled his eyebrows, his hands never leaving your hips as you led him to his room. He turned you around in his arms once he closed the doors, lowering his head to kiss you soundly, his lips gliding against yours achingly sweetly pressing himself against you. “I have been wanting to do that all day”.

You reached up pressing your lips against his again, your chest brushing against him and your hands coming to rest on his chest so you could keep your balance. Making a pleased noise in the back of his throat he cupped your cheek and started shuffling you backwards towards his bed stopping when you collided with the bed frame so he could lower you to the soft bedding without separating you. Your hands roamed his back and arms while his tongue moved with yours, each kiss becoming more intense, more desperate. Felix brought one hand up to untuck your shirt allowing him to brush his fingers along the bare skin of your stomach where he began to trace slow circles into your flesh to keep you relaxed. Toying with the hem of his shirt you felt him press his hips against your the feeling of his hardening cock making you whimper into his mouth. His warm lips moved to kiss along your neck which made you immediately move your head to give him more access to you. You felt his muscles tense as he began to pull away from you once again not wanting to cross any lines that might push you to a place you didn’t want to be except this time you didn’t want him to stop you wanted more of him, you needed more of him. 

“I’m sorry baby” he whispered, his hand withdrawing from your shirt.

“Lix, please don't stop” you murmured, feeling flustered at how quickly he was turning you on when all he had done was kiss you and draw patterns on your skin. “I want more”

“Baby” he groaned, dragging his tongue up towards your earlobe “You really sure?”. 

“Yes” you let yourself pull his hair lightly making him groan again before connecting his lips back to you with more intensity. 

“Shit, let me see you please” he almost whined, moving to kneel between your thighs and helping you to unbutton your shirt which fell away from you to fan out on the bed around you. Hands moving to carefully massage your covered breasts he leant in to kiss you again. Letting a quiet moan fall from your mouth as his fingertips teased your nipples through your bra you arched into his hands making him smirk against your skin, his hands skimming lower to slip under your skirt allowing him to access more of your silky skin.

“Tell me when you want me to stop baby” he murmured against your lips kissing you again lovingly “don’t want to hurt you”. You slipped your own fingers under his shirt stoking them cautiously against his abs feeling the muscles under his skin contract under your touch emboldening you to touch him further pressing your palms against the muscles you slid your hands up his chest exposing more of him to you. Smirking he pulled away from you, pulling his shirt off and throwing it behind him, you could tell he was enjoying the flushed look of lust that was adorning your face the way your eyes were now glued to his bare chest. 

Unable to stop yourself from running your hands all over him you were fine with him continuing to tease you with kisses and light touches until he began to tug on the zipper at the side of your skirt, gulping down a breath you moved your hand to his halting his actions immediately. Felix slowly took his hands off of you, meeting your eyes you could see the longing and lust that swirled in them but he was already moving to straighten up and give you space, he was again prepared to leave himself frustrated again to make you comfortable which made something inside you spark to life. Moving your own hands towards your hip you unzipped your skirt watching as his eyes widened before smiling adoringly at you helping you shimmy out of the last of your clothes leaving you as bare as you had ever been in front of him before. His hungry eyes roamed your body with such heat that you thought you might melt under his gaze.

“Fuck, you are a goddess, my goddess” he purred undoing his jeans and pulling them off before moving to cover your body with his again, Felix ran his fingers beneath the hem of your underwear on the outside of your thigh while he kissed you passionately “Will you let me touch you baby?”.

“Please Lixie” you sighed as he began kissing his way down to the mounds of your breasts licking and suckling at the skin as his fingers started to dance on the inside of your thigh. Unintentionally you spread your legs further apart feeling him groan against your chest as he continued to tickle your sensitive flesh. Caressing and kissing every inch of the skin he could he slowly let his fingers glide over your clothed heat in featherlike strokes letting you wiggle beneath him as he looked at your adoringly, when you didn’t stop him he began to press harder against you feeling yous how wet you were.

“Shit baby, your so wet” he grunted latching his lips back onto your neck as he pulled the fabric to the side touching you for the first time “Fuck, bet you taste so good baby”.

“Felix” you mewled as his fingers finally found your clit stroking it gently until you were panting softly “Oh my god Felix” you whined bucking your hips against his hand. His deep chuckle against your throat made you melt to the point you almost forgot to breathe when one of his fingers circled your entrance and slowly pushed into you.

“Does that feel good baby?” he hummed, kissing your lips lightly before adding a second finger to pump into your velvet walls, his thumb now rubbing tight circles against your clit.

“So good Lix” you whimpered, feeling fire erupt from your core and spread through your veins, thrumming with the beat of your heart until you couldn’t take it anymore and fell off the edge cumming hard around his fingers.

“There you go baby, fuck you look so perfect falling apart around me” he groaned his need for you obvious in his voice “Do you want more baby or do you want to stop?”.

“I wanna try something, can I taste you Lixie?” you almost begged looking at him through your lashes as you tried to catch your breath. The words falling from your lips faster than your brain could stop them. 

“You are going to kill me baby” he ground out getting off of you and helping you to sit up “Are you sure?”.

“Please Lix, please” you begged, reaching for the waistband of his boxes stopping to trace your fingers slowly down the length of his hard on, hearing him suck in a breath at your boldness, easing down his boxers you eyes widened when his rock hard cock bounced against his muscular abs the deep pink tip already leaking with precum. You reached out for him, your mouth already watering as your hand wrapped around him squeezing and pumping it slowly making him moan softly. Opening your mouth you traced the vein that ran the length of it, pulsing under your tongue and he cupped your face gently not forcing anything on you. You ran your tongue around the tip, flicking your tongue into the slit to collect his salty fluid, still watching him from beneath your lashes before you took him into your mouth, licking as much as you could to coat his dick before you tried to take it all into your mouth. With your hand still wrapped around the base you took as much as you could into your mouth, your tongue flattening as he glided in and out of you.

“Fucking hell, you are a fucking queen” Felix groaned letting his head fall forward as you took another inch of his length allowing him to touch the back of your throat, you couldn’t help the small cough that it elicited as you garbled around his dick saliva pooling at the corners of your mouth closing your eyes you focused on just taking him as far into your mouth as possible. You could feel Felix’s abs contract everytime you pressed him back against the back of your throat so you continued to try and fit even more of him into your throat until you couldn’t control our gag reflex choking around him slightly tears sprang to your eyes and Felix let out a deep whine brushing a stray tear from your cheek with his thumb. You continued bobbing your head hoping he was enjoying it as much as you had enjoyed his fingers feeling him start to tense continually under your hands you looked up at him again noticing the hooded eyes and pinched eyebrows you pushed yourself further to take the final inch of his cock. When your nose finally hit his pubic bone Felix let out an almost pornographic moan of your name pulling himself from your mouth you tried to complain but you were cut off by ropes of thick white seed spurting onto your chest and dripping down onto your tits. Felix was still cupping your face as he leant forward to crash his lips into yours, his tongue licking into your mouth and moving with yours until you felt light headed. Leaving you heaving for breath he slipped into your bathroom to grab a wash cloth before returning to you to start cleaning you up.

“Was that ok?” you mumbled softly looking at his back as he went back into the bathroom to rinse out the washcloth.

“Baby, did you not see how hard you made me cum, like all over you?” Felix laughed gently, his eyes creasing into perfect little moons as he came back to you to kiss you lightly.

“I’ve never done that before, I didn’t want you to not like it” you whispered against his lips making him freeze.

“You have never given oral before?” he blinked rapidly, his eyes widening at the realization “I was the first guy you have done that with?”.

“Yeah, I wanted to wait for someone I really like” you admitted blushing furiously all the way down to your bare chest “I wanted to make you feel good”.

“You made me feel so good baby, so fucking good, shit you are the most incredible girlfriend” he rambled pulling you to your feet and wrapping his arms around you, he buried his face in your neck and he squeezed you tightly. “I will order you every single food your heart desires then I will show you just how much I appreciate you”.  

A/N: Thank you for reading my lovelies, I'm sorry the updates are so far between but it takes more energy than I regularly have to write this one but I will keep going until it is finished. All your likes, reblogs, comments and support are a god send xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz @armystay89 @damnyouficc @roamingpolar @bakedlilgoonie @shiy @is2cb97 @beautifulixr @skyhold-tara @army-stay-noel @skizzel-reblogs @facelesswrittes @animehideout @mrsseals16 @honey-pop @fawnpeaks @leeknowinggg @uno7 @seungminluv3 @obeythemasters @tanzen-ist-gold @thicccurls @juskz @3rachasninja @reiheis @partyparty-yah @leeknowyah @warren-thedarkangel @highlydestiny @galamxy @velvetmoonlght @kapelover @luvjini @leefelixsslut

[etceteraon]

echoes of exile | chapter one

pov: female reader pov

genre: angst, sci-fi, series, slow-burn

warnings: space, sci-fi themes

word count: 7.8k

summary: After the long awaited return of the space program, seven crew members were finally announced to take the long awaited leap into space, their mission to find a safe location to build a liveable society. Their mission could take years to successfully finish, but the crew is loyal to their duty, unaware of the fact that their government is only using them for something more sinister.

a/n: This is the first chapter of a series I have been building for a few years now. The first few chapters will be introductory, but I hope you enjoy the eventual lore drops and in-depth world building that will come! For now, I will be keeping any romance and potential pairings tight lipped since I intend for this to be a slow burn. Chapters may be a little slow, but more will be coming soon.

Waking up in the comfort of your own bed was nothing new to you. In fact, it was something you had grown accustomed to. That was nothing out of the ordinary considering most of the population was used to sleeping in their own beds, wrapped in their comforters, either with a partner or alone. For you however, it wasn’t always normal. You had grown up in a normal household, it wasn’t exactly the best, but you were never considered ‘poor’ just middle class or blue collar. Once you got out of highschool however, things changed. After applying for college, all of the scholarships and money you received went straight to tuition. Unable to afford to live in the dorms or have your own place, you were constantly couch hopping, sometimes sleeping on a park bench or in a homeless shelter every now and then. It wasn’t ideal, but it got the job done. After four years of this, you graduated with your masters in engineering. 

Now, with a masters in aeronautics and a minor in electrical engineering, you could do a lot of things. Find plenty of jobs that paid the bills. But the job you had chosen wasn't exactly the most mainstream. You had decided years ago that you were going to be an astronaut. So, the first thing you had done once you received your masters was apply to the space program as an intern. Luckily, being an intern in the space program paid more than normal jobs, so you weren’t hurting for money anymore. You were able to afford a small apartment with the help of another intern you were roommates with, a male by the name of Felix who had his masters in computer science. He was also looking to become an astronaut, and luckily for the both of you, it seemed that once you had done your due diligence for a few years, you would be placed in the same crew. 

That was, until you were introduced to a pilot. Christopher Bang, he was a very well-known pilot with a masters degree in physical science. He was a genius in every sense of the word, so when you and Felix had been introduced to him by the grace of Seungmin, the flight director for mission control, you were both in shock and awe when he kindly offered to teach the both of you to pilot a jet. It would make things a lot easier for the both of you since it would only require 1,000 hours as opposed to a few years working in the field. Of course the both of you had taken him up on his offer, now spending the majority of your time learning the ins and outs of piloting a jet, eventually getting up in the air. After about a month, you were able to pilot the jet on your own, Felix as well. Another month or so later, the both of you had completed your 1,000 hours as a pilot-in-command.

Now all you two had to complete was the long-duration flight physical and you both would be deemed astronauts. The timing was almost too perfect since the space program had just announced they would be looking for astronauts for a new mission they were launching. You and Felix had decided you were going to be on that crew no matter what it took, and it seemed like Christopher had the same idea. He hadn’t originally planned to be an astronaut according to his own words, but once he had heard about the mission and heard you and Felix were aiming to be on the first flight out, he wanted to join. He stated that it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and he had nothing better to do. You weren’t so sure of that, but you let his excuses slide. 

The long-duration flight physical wasn’t easy to pass. Not in the slightest. Of course Christopher had passed without much of an issue. Felix passed the third or fourth time around, meanwhile it took you around six times to actually pass. Along with the help of Christopher and Felix both instructing you on what to do and helping you work out your body in specific areas. With that done and out of the way, you were now finally able to rest after years of hard work. Simply waiting for word back on whether or not you were accepted as a candidate for the mission and interviewed along with the other candidates. 

So here you were, lying in bed, staring up at the ceiling after a long, well deserved rest. You could hear Felix rummaging around in the kitchen, a sure sign that he had been up and about for a while. Glancing over at the digital clock on your nightstand, you were made aware that you had slept in for much longer than you had intended, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as you wondered why your alarm hadn’t gone off. Slowly peeling yourself off of the mattress, you rubbed your sleep ridden eyes, yawning as you kicked your legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Stretching your arms over your head, you stood there for a moment, letting your body relax and wake itself up before heading over to the bedroom door and propping it open slightly, just enough to peek out and see if Felix had anyone over. 

You didn’t see anyone besides the brunette male, so you decided to step out of your bedroom in your strapped tank and shorts that were meant to be worn for workout purposes, but really only got worn to bed. You hadn’t even brushed your hair, so you had no idea what state it was currently in, but by the amused look on Felix’s face when he caught sight of you, it most likely wasn’t pleasant. “Well good afternoon. I take it you slept well?” He teased, raising an eyebrow as he continued to work on what he had set in front of him, cutting up various vegetables and other assorted items. A quiet hum of acknowledgement was all that left you at first, walking into the shared kitchen and opening the fridge, browsing through the contents before simply pulling out a bottle of water and cracking it open. Once the cold beverage passed your lips you sighed, closing the fridge and looking directly at the freckled boy. “Slept for much longer than I intended. My alarm didn’t go off for some reason.” 

The statement made Felix snicker for a reason unknown to you. He stopped cutting for a moment to look at you, a smirk tugging on his lips. “Your alarm did go off. I had to go into your room and shut it off since you didn’t even wake up.” Your eyes widened at the sudden realization, placing the cap on the bottled water as you approached the lanky male. “You didn’t think to wake me up? What the hell Lix?” 

“Hey, don’t get mad at me. I figured since you didn’t wake up to your alarm that you needed the rest. I didn’t want to wake you up just for you to not get enough sleep. Besides, it’s not like you have anything to do today right?” He posed a question, tilting his head slightly before going back to cutting, focusing his attention forward. “Well actually I did have plans today. But now I’m going to be la-” You paused your reprimands when you heard Felix’s bedroom door open and close, revealing none other than Felix’s boyfriend of a few months, Hwang Hyunjin, the public affairs officer of mission control. 

The tall male only paid you a glance before a smirk similar to the one Felix had worn not too long ago adorned his features. “Oh? You have plans? That’s new.” The long haired boy commented, clearly having been listening to the conversation that had nothing to do with him. “Oh shut it Hyunjin, not like you’re any better than me considering the only place you go besides work is here.” 

“She does have a point.” Felix muttered, causing the long haired male to groan in frustration. “You’re supposed to be on my side.”

With a roll of your eyes you opted to exit the kitchen, heading back to the safety of your room to get dressed and ready before you were much later to your plans than you wanted to be. Before you shut the door to your room, you glanced back at the two males, clicking your tongue at them. “Next time you spend the night, tell me. I’d rather not wake up to a strange man in my apartment.” The door was closed before any protests could leave Hyunjin’s mouth, quiet giggles could be heard from Felix, but nothing more as you went over to your closet and started picking out your clothing for the day. 

You were never one for really dressing up, mainly because you could never really afford it, but also because it just took a lot of time and effort that you didn’t really have. So when you were able to afford a nice wardrobe, you mainly stuck to a business casual look. It also made work life a lot easier since you didn’t have to think much about whether what you were wearing was ‘work appropriate’. Everything in your wardrobe was. So, today was no different, picking out a high-waisted pair of black slacks, a white cami top and a brown blazer. You decided shoes would be an issue for later, setting your clothing down on your bed before heading into your bathroom, turning on the shower before peeling off the clothes you had been in all night and half of the day and then hopping in the shower. 

It wasn’t long before you were clean to your standards, stepping out of the shower and drying yourself off with a towel. You then brushed through your hair as you walked back out into your bedroom, glancing at the door to make sure it was locked before ridding yourself of the towel and getting dressed in what you had laid out minutes before. As if on cue, there was a knock at your door, signaling someone wanted your attention. You looked over as if you could see who it was through the wood, tilting your head slightly. “Yeah?” 

“Are you going to eat before you leave?” Felix. Of course it was. You thought about his question for a moment, deliberating on it for too long according to his liking, causing the male to huff. “Yes? No?” He prodded, earning a groan from you as you went over to the door and unlocked it before opening it, going over to your closet and pulling out a pair of black strappy heels. 

“Probably not considering I’m going to be eating there.” You answered his question, thought it seemed your answer only gained more questions from him. Feuling his curiosity. “There? Where is there? Are you meeting someone? Is this a date? Oh my god if this is a date I’m going to be so mad that you didn’t tell me. Who is it?” For the second time since you had awoken, you rolled your eyes, shaking your head as you made your way back into the bathroom to pull your hair up out of your face, Felix trailing along behind you. 

“First of all, this is not a date. You of all people should know that I don’t date. I don’t have the time or energy for a relationship. Secondly, I’m going out for lunch. I was invited to this new place not far from work, I think it’s called Vincenzo’s or something. Lastly, if you want to know so badly who it is, you can figure it out for yourself when he gets here.” You stated matter-of-factly. Felix frowning and folding his arms across his chest as he leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom. “So, you were invited out to lunch by a guy… who is picking you up and taking you there? Sounds a lot like a date to me.” He muttered, his eyebrows creased. 

With your hair now in a ponytail, you turned to face the slightly older male, sighing quietly. “Lix, why would I lie to you about something like this? It’s just lunch. It’s a nice thing people do sometimes. It doesn’t always have to be a date. The only reason I’m not driving myself is because my car is being worked on, remember?” Felix seemed to lighten up a little once he realized he wasn’t being lied to, nodding his head slowly as he lifted himself up. “Yeah, sorry. You’re right. I’m just being nosy since you’re usually busy with work or just holed up in your room.” 

You nodded in understanding, paying him a small smile as you stepped past him into the bedroom, putting on some earrings and placing your watch on your wrist right as the doorbell rang. Felix’s eyes lit up and before you could tell him to open the door, he was already there. You shook your head at his eagerness, spraying some perfume on and giving yourself one last glance in the mirror before grabbing your purse and exiting the room, closing the door behind you. Sure enough, there stood none other than Christopher Bang in the doorway, Felix bombarding him with questions that male the poor male’s head spin. You looked over to your friend's boyfriend, motioning towards the smaller male. “Can you control him please?” There was a long stare shared between the two of you before the long haired male sighed and went over to his boyfriend, pulling him back by his hips and whispering something in his ear which made Felix stop asking questions. You were curious as to what was said, but before your curiosity could get the better of you, Chan stepped into the apartment, looking around. 

He had never been to your apartment before, so it only made sense for him to take everything in. You stood in silence for a while, glancing down at your feet before looking up at the pilot, noting his all black decor. It was different in comparison to his pilot uniform that you always saw him in, that or the uniforms you had been provided while training for the long-duration flight physical. He was clad in a long sleeved button up shirt along with some jeans and tennis shoes, making him look much more casual than you, but nonetheless still somewhat classy with the button up. His dark brown hair was of course in its natural state, curly and unruly. He had stated many times that despite trying to work with it, it never seemed to want to agree with him. So he let it do its own thing. 

“I take it you’re set to go?” His voice snapped you out of your trance, quickly raising your gaze to his and putting on a smile to hide your embarrassment from being caught staring. “Yeah, all good to go. Thanks for picking me up, it would have been a nightmare to have Felix drive me.” A chuckle left the pilot's lips, nodding as he stepped back out of the apartment, leaving you enough room to follow behind. 

“It’s not a problem really. I figured I might as well since I was the one who set everything up and asked you to join me. Which reminds me, did I ever tell you the occasion?” He questioned, not stopping his descent down the stairs towards his parked car. You hummed in thought before shaking your head, realizing he hadn’t told you why he had offered to take you to lunch. “No, you didn’t.” You finally answered, causing Christopher to laugh quietly to himself as he reached his car, ignoring the stares from Hyunjin and Felix.

Once the car was unlocked and you were both inside, you took a moment to take in the state of his car. Clean, so clean that it almost seemed like the car was never used. There was the scent of cologne however, which made you wonder if he had sprayed it before leaving the car. Before you could see if there was a bottle of it lying around, Chan decided to break his silence about what this lunch was really for. “Seungmin rounded up the Mission Operations Directorate Manager and apparently he wanted to talk with you. So uh, really, this is kind of like a business meeting. For you anyway. I’m already acquainted with him and Seungmin.” Your eyes widened as you turned to face the pilot, jaw dropped in shock as he simply smirked, pulling out of the parking lot and keeping his attention on the road. 

“You didn’t think to ask me if I wanted to meet him? Or even inform me beforehand? I’ve heard the guy is a total asshole and I don’t think I even want to be in his presence.” You growled, earning a scoff from Christopher. “He’s not an asshole. He’s just strict when it comes to work. Which he should be considering where he works and what he does. There’s no room for error. Besides, if you want to be on the next crew out of here, he’s going to be in charge of you. You might as well get to know him now and get on his good side, no?” He countered, making you puff out your cheeks in irritation because, goddamn it he was always right. 

“I guess.” You muttered, having no good comeback. Of course, Christopher knew that he had succeeded in winning the argument, so he stayed silent, simply smiling rather smugly in the driver's seat. The rest of the car ride was spent in silence, Christopher parking the car not far from the restaurant’s entrance once you arrived. Unbuckling your seatbelt, you leaned back in the seat for a moment, taking a deep breath and closing your eyes. It was your way of calming yourself down before something stressful, Christopher knew this since you did it almost every time you were about to fly. So, he left you to it, not saying a word as he stepped out of the car and shut the door behind him. After a minute or so, you had managed to control your thoughts, keeping your anxiety at bay. As you stepped out of the car, you noticed Christopher had been leaning on the hood, waiting for you. A soft smile formed on your lips, but it quickly faded when he turned to face you, an eyebrow raised in question. 

“Yeah, I’m all good.” You assured him, not even needing him to ask the question to know what he was going to say. He nodded, pushing himself off of the car and making his way to the entrance of the restaurant. Like the gentleman he was, he propped open the door for you, letting you enter the building first before following close behind, looking over you to see if he could spot Seungmin and the Directorate Manager. You were about to talk to the lady at the front counter when Christopher placed a hand on your shoulder, motioning to your left. “They’re over there.” He stated, nudging you slightly. It wasn’t anything invasive or pushy, just enough to get your attention. Glancing over, you saw that he was indeed right, though you only recognized Seungmin. You let him go over towards the table first, informing the server where you would be sitting with the rest of your group before following behind the pilot. Putting on a smile as you approached the other males, you noted that they didn’t stand despite acknowledging yours and Christopher’s presence. 

Before you could pull out a chair for yourself, Christopher took the liberty of doing it himself. A mumbled thanks left your lips as you sat down across from the unfamiliar male, Christopher sitting beside you and across from Seungmin. You placed your purse on the back of your chair, trying your best to avoid eye contact with anyone since it felt like all eyes were on you. You opted to look at the menu that was set in front of you, fumbling through the pages as Christopher cleared his throat, trying to fill the awkward silence. “So, Mister Lee, it’s been quite some time. It’s nice to see you again, I know you have quite a busy schedule.” A quiet chuckle could be heard from in front of you, but you kept your eyes glued to the menu, not even focusing on the words despite skimming them over and over again. 

“Chris, how many times do we have to go over this? You don’t need to call me by any special terms when we’re not at work. It’s just Minho, you are older than me after all.” Shocked by the relatively easy-going nature of the Directorate Manager, you lifted your gaze, only to see he was looking right back at you. Your eyes widened slightly, your breath caught in your throat as he smiled, tilting his head slightly. “You must be y/f/n y/l/n. I’ve heard a lot about you, moving up the ranks pretty fast hm?” 

You weren’t sure what to say, so you simply nodded, a nervous smile the only thing you could manage. How did he know about you? You weren’t the only person who was trying to become an astronaut. There were thousands of other people shooting for the same thing, Felix and Christopher included, so why was the focus on you? You couldn’t recall doing anything spectacular to gain any attention. Your mind was spinning with questions, but before you could ask any, Minho continued on. “Before you ask, I do research on everyone. I found your background quite interesting. Perfect scores throughout middle school, high school and college. Then once you became an intern, all anyone had to say about you was good things. Christopher tells me that your piloting skills are nowhere near subpar, so I have to ask, is there anything you can’t do? Or are you just another genius we have on our hands?” 

To say you were at a loss for words was an understatement. Your jaw nearly dropped at the blatant compliments and praises that were leaving Minho’s mouth, looking to Seungmin for some kind of confirmation, he simply smiled and shrugged. You then turned your attention to Christopher who chuckled at your expression, shaking his head. “You’ll have to excuse her, she doesn’t know how to respond to compliments, especially from you.” 

“Ah. Well please, don’t worry too much about your image. I know perfectly well about your work ethic and that’s all that matters to me. Feel free to be yourself outside of work, I’m just here to get to know you a little better. That’s all.” He assured, easing your nerves just slightly. Taking a deep breath and laughing quietly to yourself, you sat up straight, setting the menu back down on the table and clasping your hands together on top of it. Returning your gaze forward, Minho’s piercing gaze was still locked on you. Gulping down your anxiety, you forced a smile, ignoring the stares from Seungmin and Christopher. “Well, thank you for the kind words. However, I’m not a genius like Christopher I can assure you. I simply aced my classes because I had to. Nothing more. As for what you’ve heard about me at work, I’m glad they are all good things, but once again I must tell you that I feel like what you’ve heard is blown out of proportion. I do my work and I go home. It’s not like I’m going out of my way to do anything major.” 

A scoff could be heard from beside you, Christopher leaning forward to try and catch your gaze with a disapproving look. “That’s not true. Anyone who works with you knows that.” He grumbled, Seungmin clearing his throat to finally speak up. “I agree with Christopher. You may not think that you do anything major, but if you really aren’t trying that hard like you say you are, that only makes it more impressive.” 

“I hardly think that’s true. I-”

“So you are a genius like Christopher. Good to know.” Minho cut you off, a smirk tugging at his lips as he picked up his menu and started browsing. He seemed awfully smug with the fact that he had shut you up, causing you to huff and mutter a few things under your breath as you picked your menu back up, the server approaching just moments later. After asking the table what they wanted to drink, everyone ordered their assorted beverages, the server then leaving to give you more time to consider your meal. Silence gripped the table. Not one person speaking a word as they looked at the menus. It felt awkward, you weren’t sure why, but you weren’t about to ask. A few minutes passed before the server came back with the drinks, setting them down and earning a plethora of thanks. Once asked if everyone was ready to order, Minho answered for the table, ordering first, followed by Seungmin, then Christopher, then you. 

After everyone had ordered their meals, the server left the table yet again, leaving the four of you to your devices. You were half tempted to pull out your phone, but you knew it would be rude, so you fiddled with your hands in your lap, looking around the restaurant for some form of entertainment or stimulation. There was a couple with a baby in a high chair who was less than happy to be there, something that you saw almost anywhere you went. An old lady seated by herself, which seemed sad at first glance, but after a few moments a younger woman who looked like her daughter came out from the bathroom and sat across from her. You smiled at this, happy to know she wasn’t alone. Apparently you had been tuning out and a conversation had started at the table. Christopher nudging you and calling your name snapped you out of your trance. 

“Hm?” You looked to the pilot for some sort of explanation. “Minho was curious what made you want to become an astronaut.” He reiterated, glancing over at said male who nodded in agreement. 

“It’s not exactly a job everyone wants. Sure, we get a lot of applications, but compared to the population, it’s miniscule. I don’t think you just woke up one day and decided that you wanted to do this. Especially since your masters is geared towards the career.” Minho stated, resting his chin in the palm of his hand as his elbow rested on the table. You nodded slowly, trying to figure out the best way to word it. “Well, I’ve always been interested in life beyond Earth since I was little. I read lots of books about space and astronomy, the public library was where I went everyday after school.” You recalled, smiling fondly at the memories. 

“When I was first asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I told everyone I wanted to be an astronaut. The older I got, the more people told me that it was unrealistic, and that I should try to shoot for something else. I’m stubborn though and I decided that no one was going to tell me what to do, so here I am. I guess you could say that I wanted to become an astronaut out of spite.” You snickered, Minho chuckling at your honest response. “Well, that’s the first time I’ve heard that.” He admitted, Seungmin and Christopher agreeing in amusement. 

“I mean, Chris has said that he only applied because he had nothing better to do. I guess geniuses have nothing better to do with their time besides do things out of spite and boredom.” You shrugged, Christopher nearly choking on his spit beside you. “I- That’s not-” He stammered, Minho laughing out of pure amusement. 

“Sounds like something he would say.” He stated cooly, running a hand through his auburn hair which was clearly dyed, but it looked good on him, natural even. As you were noting his other features, eyes that reminded you of a feline, a gaze that could kill, his lips seemed to be permanently curled up into a half smirk. If you hadn’t known any better, you would chock it up to him having a big ego and cocky attitude. It didn’t seem that he was like that with what he had said to you earlier, but nonetheless, he still gave off those vibes. His nose was similar to Felix’s. You hadn’t realized you would recognize something like that, but considering you had been around Felix for so long, perhaps it was something that was just in the back of your head that hadn’t come up until now. 

“Y/N?” You looked around the table, only to realize that the person that had called out to you was the man you had been staring at not so subtly. Of course it had to be him. You could feel your cheeks heating up with embarrassment, one hundred percent sure that he was aware of your staring. You opened your mouth to apologize, only to be cut off. It seemed Minho was good at doing that. “You seem to get along well with Christopher and Felix, am I right?” He questioned, catching you off guard once again. 

Nodding your head in response, you fought the urge to look over at Christopher who seemed tense beside you. You weren’t sure why, but you made a mental note to ask him about it later. Minho hummed, leaning back in his chair, seeming to think about something. Just then the server came to the table with everyone’s food, setting them down and asking the usual questions before retreating from the table once again, Minho sitting up straight and clasping his hands together. “How do you think you would feel about them after spending two years of training with them followed by spending years with them in space?” The question in itself wasn’t really surprising, but it was the look that Minho shot Christopher when he asked you. You couldn’t quite place what it was, but it didn’t exactly seem friendly. “Uhm, well… I’ve already spent over a year with Felix as a roommate and a co-worker, so I’m sure I could manage with him. As for Christopher, I haven’t known him as long, but we’ve never had any big disagreements or arguments. We get along fairly well I think, so I’m sure I could handle him for a few years.” You giggled out the last part, finally looking over at Christopher who paid you a soft smile. It looked like he was hiding his true feelings, like he was being insincere, but you couldn’t think of a reason he would be, so you brushed it off. 

“That’s good. I’m glad to hear that.” Was all Minho said in response before starting to eat, Seungmin following suit shortly after. You figured that was a signal that you could eat as well, so you picked up your utensils, only to see that Christopher was just staring down at his food. You raised an eyebrow in confusion, nudging him slightly. He didn’t look over at you immediately, taking a few moments before actually facing you. You tilted your head, motioning towards his food. “Aren’t you going to eat?” Clearly concerned, you set down your own utensils, catching the attention of the other two males across the table. Their gazes seemed to bother Chris more than yours, causing him to pick up his own utensils with a forced smile. 

“Yeah, sorry. I just got lost in thought.” The pilot then started to eat without another word. Everything suddenly felt off, but you knew it wasn’t your place to ask any questions. Keeping to yourself, you picked your utensils back up, lifting them to your lips right as your phone went off in your purse. Quickly, you set everything down, turning around to fumble through your purse to find your phone. Once you had, you were prepared to turn off the ringer, only to note the number that was calling you, the selection board. You nearly gasped, placing your hand over your lips before looking across the table at Minho who had a knowing look on his face. “I’m sorry, I need to take this.” You apologized, Minho shaking his head and motioning to the side.

“No worries, go ahead.” Nodding, you stood from your seat, pushing your chair back before heading out of the restaurant, standing by the door as you answered the call, placing the phone up to your ear. “This is y/f/n y/l/n.” 

“Miss y/l/n, this is Taehyun Kang from the selection board. It is my pleasure to inform you that you have been selected for an interview.” Your heart nearly leapt out of your chest, but you knew you had to keep it together and keep it professional on the phone. “Thank you so much, this is great news. What time and what day will the interview be?” Information, that's what you needed right now before you got too ecstatic. 

“This Friday at 6pm. Does that work for you?”

“Of course. I’ll be there.”

“All right. We’ll talk to you then Miss y/l/n.”

The call then went dead, leaving you to your own devices. You hadn’t even realized you were shaking, a chuckle of disbelief left you as you clasped your phone in your hands. This was actually happening. You were actually going to be interviewed by the selection board. You had to make it to the second interview, you had to make all of this hard work count. If you didn’t get selected then all of this was for nothing. The stress and anxiety was starting to set in, your lip suffering due to the pressure you were putting on it. Biting your lip had always been a nervous tick of yours. 

What had you been expecting? You had applied as a candidate fully expecting for it to work out, so now that things were going in your favor, why were you so surprised? Maybe you hadn’t really thought about it much as you thought you had. Your head was spinning with questions and worries. What were you going to wear to the interview? How would you get there with your car still being worked on? How were you going to tell Felix? Had he been called for an interview? What about Christopher who was right inside, waiting for you. Right, you had people waiting for you. 

Turning, you pushed open the door to the restaurant, stepping back inside and trying your best to act as natural as possible. All eyes were on you once again as you approached the table, sitting back down and being sure your phone was on silent this time as you placed it back in your purse. Picking your utensils back up, you finally began to eat, the food was a little cold, but overall it was still palatable. Of course, you couldn’t ignore the stares for long, Christopher being the first to speak up. “Who was that on the phone?” You nearly froze, swallowing what you had in your mouth before you had the chance to choke. “Uhm, well- actually…” You tried to figure out how to phrase it, figuring Christopher hadn’t been contacted and not wanting to somehow end up hurting his feelings. 

“It was the selection board.” Minho suddenly piped up, your eyes widening at how sure he sounded. Christopher turned to face you completely now, his eyes lighting up as he smiled. “Was it really? Did you get an interview?” Gulping, you smiled sheepishly, nodding your head. 

“Y-Yeah, they set an interview for this Friday at six.” You admitted, Christopher seeming overjoyed at the news, Minho acting as if he knew it was coming all along, meanwhile Seungmin was tuned out, focused on the food in front of him. “That’s so great y/n, I can drive you to the interview if you need me to. Will your car be out of the shop by then?” You were surprised at Christopher’s reactions, something not adding up. Was he really this happy for you if he hadn’t been selected for an interview himself? 

“Chris, did you not get called for an interview?” Finally you had amounted the courage to ask. Christopher paused for a moment only to chuckle and rub the back of his neck as he looked away. “Actually, I was called for an interview last night. I didn’t want to tell you in case you didn’t get a call.” He admitted, a gasp leaving your lips. “Well that’s not fair, you should have told me. I would have been more upset if I hadn’t been called and you didn’t tell me.” 

Shrugging his shoulders with a sigh, Christopher picked up his drink, taking a few gulps before setting it back down. “So, I’m picking you up on Friday, five thirty?” He had just completely ignored what you had said to him, but that was nothing new. If he didn’t want to address something, he wouldn’t. “I don’t think that will be necessary.” Minho suddenly spoke up again, earning both yours and Christopher’s attention. 

“Felix will have an interview at the same time. You can ride with him, right?” So Felix was going to be interviewed as well? Oh the boy was going to be beside himself whenever you got back to the apartment. His poor boyfriend was probably having to deal with his spastic energy right at this moment. “I mean, yeah. I’m sure that will work out just fine.” You mumbled, noting the slight glare Christopher sent in Minho’s direction. 

The younger male seemed to pay no mind however, simply smiling and nodding his head in agreement. “Then that’s all settled. Congratulations on your interview y/n, I can’t wait to see what else you accomplish.” He sent you a wink before standing up, Seungmin following suit quickly after. It looked as if Minho had hardly touched his food, Seungmin had eaten pretty much everything however. Minho made his way up to the front counter, paying for his and everyone else's meal. Before leaving the restaurant, he turned to face the two of you that were left at the table. “I’ll see you around y/n. Nice seeing you Christopher.” He offered a small wave before leaving the building with Seungmin in tow, Christopher muttering a few things under his breath that you couldn’t make out, but it didn’t sound pleasant. 

“What was that all about?” You questioned, looking at the pilot who now had an unreadable expression on his face. It was definitely one you had never seen on him before. You knew something was going on between him and Minho, but you couldn’t tell what. Christopher had just been talking about how Minho was a good guy, just strict when it came to work. So why was he sending him glares during lunch? What was going on that you didn’t know about? Christopher forced a chuckle, shaking his head as he raked a hand through his dark brown curls. “Nothing, just thinking.” Setting down his utensils, he leaned back in his seat, looking over at your plate which still had most of the food still on it. 

“Did you want to get a box for that?” He questioned, making you frown. “Chris. You’re changing the subject because you’re lying to me. I’m not an idiot. You of all people should know that. I can see right through you. You’ve been acting weird since our food got here, what’s the deal?” 

Biting down on the inside of his cheek, Christopher looked up at the ceiling, staying silent for a while before sighing and hanging his head. “I don’t know, something about how Minho was talking to you gave me a weird feeling. I’m just worried about you and what he’s planning.” he admitted, causing you to furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Christopher bit at the skin of his lip before rubbing his face with one of his hands, clearly struggling with whatever was going on in his mind. “I know Minho, and he’s not a bad guy, but I know that there’s more that goes on in his head than he lets on. He’s not the directorate manager for nothing. I just think it’s odd. He’s never taken an interest in someone like he is with you. Sure, he does his research on everyone, but he’s never explicitly wanted to meet someone like this. Especially not an intern.” You frowned, folding your arms across your chest while tilting your head. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I’m not trying to say that in a degrading way. I could care less that you’re an intern, you’re smarter than half of the people I work with who aren’t interns. I’m just saying, Minho is someone who cares about status and hierarchy. Normally he wouldn’t even look in an intern's direction. So for him to be going out of his way for an intern, it’s weird. It’s not normal. He’s pulling strings behind the scenes for you and this is his first time meeting you. It’s like he knows something I don’t and I don’t like it. Not only that but it’s almost like he’s trying to push me out of the picture, or make me out to be the bad guy? I don’t know. Maybe I’m just thinking too much because it’s uncharacteristic of him. All I’m trying to say is that I’m worried you might get hurt or used.” It took you a moment to process everything that Christopher said, but once you had, you simply sighed. The server came over to your table just then, asking if you wanted a to-go box, you obliged, watching as they scurried off to get one. You then turned your attention to Christopher who was watching you intently. 

“Listen, Chris. I appreciate your concern, I’ll keep what you said in mind, but like I said before, I’m not an idiot. I’m fully aware that he’s never met me before, I think I would have remembered meeting him. I’m cautious of everyone I meet and I know when someone is trying to use me. This doesn’t feel like that, it seems like he’s just trying to be nice and give someone an opportunity. I’m not going to turn it down just because you think something weird is going on.” You watched as Christopher took a deep breath, almost as if he was containing his anger or irritation. You couldn’t tell which it was. “Y/n. I’ve never said you were an idiot. I’m fully aware that you’re not. I’m just trying to tell you to be cautious with him, please?”

“Here you go ma’am.” The server set the to-go box down in front of you. You thanked him quietly before filling the box and closing it, getting to your feet and slinging your purse over your shoulder. “I’ll think about it.” Was all you said to Chris before turning and heading out of the restaurant. You could hear an exasperated groan leave the pilot, but you chose to ignore it, going over to his car and leaning on the passenger door as you waited for him to leave the restaurant.

Why had Christopher even driven you here if he was so worried about it? What was the point of him saying all of this stuff when he had just told you that Minho wasn’t a bad person? None of this was adding up, it was just making you more confused the longer it went on. You just wanted to go home and lay in your bed at this point. You were so tired of thinking. However you knew when you got home you wouldn’t have the option to just lie in bed. Felix was going to be off the walls with excitement and he was probably going to want to do something with you and Hyunjin to celebrate. You wouldn’t have the heart to tell the male no either. You were just going to have to pretend everything was fine and that you weren’t losing your mind. 

The sound of the car door opening snapped you out of your thoughts, Christopher simply raising an eyebrow at you before he got in the car, starting the engine. You opened the door and got in yourself, Christopher not saying a word as he waited for you to buckle your seatbelt, only pulling out of the parking lot once you had. The drive home was spent in silence, much like the ride to the restaurant had been. You were sure Christopher was upset with you for not listening to him, but you weren’t going to cave because of it. You would figure out Minho for yourself, you didn’t need Chris telling you what to do. You were a grown woman and you could make your own decisions. Christopher wasn’t your dad, nor was he your boyfriend. He was a friend, a co-worker. Nothing more. You would heed his concerns, but you weren’t going to completely avoid Minho or look into every little thing the male did. 

You were on the other hand going to be paying close attention to Christopher from now on. It seemed like he was hiding some things from you, and you were going to find out what that was whether he liked it or not. If he was going to put himself in the middle of your personal life, you could do the same. Your apartment wasn’t far from the restaurant, so you arrived fairly quickly. Not waiting for the car to come to a complete stop, you unbuckled your seatbelt, grabbing your purse and to-go box before practically kicking open the door. Before you could exit the vehicle, Chris grabbed your arm, pulling back on it slightly. “Y/n. Please don’t be mad at me. I honestly wasn’t trying to offend you or make you upset. I’m just trying to look out for you.” A scoff left your lips as you removed your arm from his grip, turning back to glare at him. “I can look out for myself. I’ve been perfectly capable of it my whole life. I don’t need your help, thank you.” You huffed, stepping out of the car and shutting the door behind you. 

You didn’t leave him any room to say anything more, making your way up the stairs to your apartment before turning the knob and opening the door, not at all surprised to see Felix clinging to his boyfriend as he celebrated his invitation for an interview. You put on a smile, closing the door behind you without a second thought, leaving Chris alone in his car as you forced yourself to celebrate with your best friend and roommate.

[jeonjungkookenthusiast1997]

Echoes of the Past (1) - Whispers of Darkness

Summary: When a night of drinking with friends unearths a dusty book long forgotten about Y/N's friends decide to try their hands at demon summoning. Disappointed it seems to not have worked they all go home leaving Y/N alone with someone lurking in the shadows. What will happen when a childhood friend, who's also an incubus, turns up looking for answers. Slight slow burn with smut to be added in future chapters.

Demon Bang Chan x Witch Female Reader.

This is my own work not a reblog! Please do not repost or translate.

Series Masterlist Navigation

Content Warnings- cursing, demonic rituals, mentions of consuming alcohol

Word Count: 1,733

As Halloween night nears and the spooky season is in full swing Y/N and her friends decide to get together for a night of drinks and fun. Y/N goes into her kitchen to root around for more alcohol, she's sure she has some hidden somewhere around her, her beautiful friend Lisa shouts to get her attention asking her to come back into the living room.

Giving up momentarily on her quest for alcohol she shrugs and rejoins her friends, stopping mid step as Jennie holds up a book you'd thought was lost when you moved house a few years ago "what are you doing with that old thing?" She asks with her nose scrunched up in mock disgust "does this shit work?" Jennie asks excitedly almost vibrating in her spot on the floor "fuck no" she laughs as she shakes her head "got given it as a birthday present one year when I was young, it's a load of shit" Y/N goes to reach for the book feeling a sudden need to protect it but stumbles having to catch herself mid air, a feat considering how buzzed she was, when Lisa snatches the book away unexpectedly "what the hell?" Y/N groans throwing herself onto her sofa "sorry honey but I need to look through this thing" she laughs as her nimble fingers flick through the dusty and brittle pages.

As the night continued Y/N had almost drifted off to sleep when a shriek made her jolt upright "who died?" She mumbles making the girls laugh, "nobody, Jennie found some hottie in that book of yours apparently" Alexa giggles as she points to the two girls drooling over what looks like a sketch of a young looking man with striking blonde locks. Y/N's eyes blink a few times as a sense of foreboding and nostalgia settle in her tummy when she looks at the ink "who is this Y/N you gotta tell me!" Jennie giggles drunkenly making her laugh "uhh a lust demon or something if I'm remembering right, haven't read that thing in a long ass time" an excited gasp shoots out of the girls perfectly glossed lips "if he's a demon that means we can summon him right?" She smirks as she wiggles the book in the grasp, the notion of doing something so spiritual in mid October makes all the other girls in the room scream happily.

That dark sense of foreboding returns to her tummy and squeezes at her chest "I… don't think that's a good idea guys'' the girls in the room start moving furniture to make space for the summoning circle they need to draw "why not?" Lisa asks as the two other girls grab supplies such as candles and chalk from around the house "you said yourself the books a load of shit" Y/N's eyebrows crease as she watches the hurried movements suddenly feeling herself start to sober up "worst case scenario nothing happens and it's a bust, best case scenario we get to order around a hot demon" she wiggles her eyebrows at the uneasy girl "who says he'll listen to we say?" Y/N asks "no duh it says so in your book" Jennie nods while pointing to the book in Lisa's hands.

Once everything is ready the girls each sit at a point around the circle and Lisa holds the book out to Y/N "what? I have to read the spell?" She asks with a frown "I don't even wanna do this" she whines "it's your book honey so you get the honours" Alexa smiles as the girls join hands "lucky me" she grumbles but places the book in her lap and holds the hands of the girls to her sides, she recites the spell as best she can from the book and they all wait with baited breath. A few moments roll by but seemingly nothing is happening "what a bust" Lisa moans as the girls all share looks of disappointment "don't look at me, I tried to warn you guys" Y/N shrugs as a long yawn escapes her body, she rolls her shoulders and stands "I think that's me done for the night sorry girls" she smiles sheepishly, they all give her a hug and thank her hosting them.

Once everyone has gone Y/N flops herself down onto her sofa in exhaustion and groans when her eyes fall onto the book abandoned on the floor. Deciding to place the book back on her bookcase where it belongs she turns to get up off the soft surface and picks up the book gently, she rubs her thumbs over the cover and smiles thinking back to her childhood and all the times she thought she was a witch who would summon demons to be her friend when she was lonely. One of the demons she remembers being especially drawn to, he even conjured her a sparkling blue rose once after she'd been bullied at the playground. She tries to remember the names she'd made up for her demonic friends but her thoughts are fuzzy like she's trying to remember a dream of a memory rather than her own actual memories.

The sound of a man clearing his throat suddenly breaks the silence making her physically jump into the air almost dropping the book when she recovers from the shock she looks to find where the noise came from and her eyes almost fall out of the sockets as she can't believe what she's looking at "Been a long time since I was last summoned by you, what a nice surprise" the voice greets her making the blood in her veins run cold "w-what do you mean since I last summoned you? I've never summoned anything in my life" she squeaks in fear "you don't remember me?" he asks, looking almost offended as he makes a move to walk towards her "I know it's been a long time Y/N but-" he's cut off when she points to him with a shaky finger making his eyebrow raise "h-how do you know my name? what's going on?" She steps back from him which makes the demon stop in his tracks as he holds his hands up looking completely confused "you truly don't remember me? at all?" he asks slowly with a look of pain painted across his beautiful face.

She shakes her head "no… the spell worked? How did the spell work?" he takes a deep breath before speaking again "yes...it did work..." he says trying to diffuse the tension in the room "it worked the same way it always has, because you're a witch" he looks deep into her eyes as he waits for his words to sink in "a… a witch? I can't be- I don't u-understand" she tries to slow her breathing as her eyes flit to the summoning circle "why didn't you appear when the girls were here?" She asks confused as he walks towards her making him sigh deeply "how could you have forgotten" he whispers looking so hurt it makes her heart clench.

He clears his throat before continuing "you used to summon me all the time when we were children, we'd play together in this very house, you even summoned my younger brothers a few times" he gestures to the room around him as if to make his point "you were able to summon me then and still can now because you have witches blood coursing through your veins, all the woman of your maternal family line have been practising witches except your mother. She turned her back on the craft a long time ago" his words are making her head spin as she tries to take in everything he's telling her "and finally, I didn't appear before because you were with other humans, of course I heard you call and felt your magic and I wanted to race up to you as soon as I could but once I sensed you weren't alone I waited in the shadows until they left" he sighs trying to help fill the gaps in her memory.

She picks up the spell book as she flicks through the pages hoping it'll help her remember something… anything "I don't remember anything you've said" she frown as his eyes drop to the floor dejectedly "I do remember playing with this book and pretending I could conjure up magical children to play with when I felt lonely but that's all it was right? Just my overactive imagination" he simply looks at her with a small smirk on his face "maybe my presence is helping you remember, that boy you remember playing with… was me. You didn't make it all up, I was real… I AM real Y/N" he thinks for a moment before holding out his hand, a small blue spark shoots from his palm and a beautiful blue rose suddenly appears in its place.

As soon as she sees the rose she gasps, holding her hand over her mouth as she looks up "Chan…? You were real all this time?" A single stray tear rolls down her cheek as he smiles widely and suddenly wraps his arms around her pulling her into a tight hug. They stay like that for a few moments before she pulls back with a confused look on her face "how could I have forgotten you? It's not everyday you just forget you can summon demons out of a magical book" the demon standing before her hums as he thinks while pacing around the room "it's possible that because this all happened when you were a child your mother told you it was all in your head and it's as simple as that or your mother could have used her magical connection to get a warlock to tamper with your memories" a sound of shock leaves her throat "warlocks exist too?" He simply nods his head "how would we know which version happened?" Bang Chan bites his lip as he weighs up his options "I could use my magic to look through your memories but it's an uncomfortable process and it requires immense trust on both parties" Y/N's brow creases as the room becomes eerily silent, the air around them filling with unspoken tension "I'll do it" she resolves as she looks up at his enchanting eyes.

[broken-glowsticks]

What Once was Mine

Chapter 11 - When, How, and Why

Genre: Childhood friends, Eventual Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Love corner/love triangle, love rivals, Series.

NOT ALL CHAPTERS WILL BE PROOF READ!!

Warnings: 18+, mdni, mentions of sex and alcohol consumption, additional warnings will be added to individual chapters as needed.

Additional warnings: mentions of explicit sex, loss of virginity, fingering (f receiving), piv, mentions of an underage related, mentions of bruises and bodily harm, slight angst.

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“What do you mean he almost kissed you?!” Felix's deep baritone ricocheted off the walls of his room, immediately followed by your hasty shushing.

“Ssshhhh! Felix, shut your face! I don't want Chan to hear!”

“Chan's elbows deep in work right now, his headphones are basically fused to his head. He's not going to hear anything.” Felix retorted, grabbing your wrists and removing the hands you had shoved against his mouth to shut him up. He didn't let you go, though. “Now spill,” he commanded, pulling you closer, a devious smile on his lips, “what exactly happened?”

With a sigh, you pulled your hands from Felix's grasp. Scooting closer to him on his bed, you tried to keep your voice down as you relayed the events that had happened the previous night.

“No fucking way, you little tease!” Felix basically sang as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder, drawing you in to roughly nuzzle you.

“Ow, ow, ow, Felix, knock it off!” You whined, shoving him off you and yanking away the pillow he was leaning on as a form of cover. Felix only giggled.

“Alright, joking aside,” Felix began, once again pulling you in but gentler this time. “How do you feel about what almost happened?”

You sighed. Laying down, you rested your head on Felix's leg, gathering your thoughts as he began to tenderly stroke your hair. How did you really feel about Hyunjin almost kissing you?

“I feel like there's something going on that he's not telling me.”

“Okay, elaborate?”

“Hyunjin… struggles to communicate how he feels, he always has. The sex… always meant more.”

“More for him? I thought it was just something casual?” Felix meant no harm in his questions, genuinely wanting to understand. Before tonight, Felix didn't know Hyunjin as anything other than an obstacle to you and Changbins’ budding relationship. Everything he's ever learned about the guy has come from Jisungs’ blatant and self-admitted biased view. And while you knew Felix was still trying to sort things out, it still stung to be reminded how much you wished the sex with Hyunjin meant something different than it did. But you never pushed. You never dared to expose yourself like that because the entire time you were with him, you knew what those moments meant for Hyunjin.

“Hooking up…” you began, trying to find the words to properly express yourself, “sure, we would sometimes do it for fun or to de-stress, but that's not how it started.”

“Then… how did it start?” Taking your face in his hands, Felix leaned over, meeting his eyes with yours. “If the sex wasn't mainly just for fun, then what made you two start up in the first place?”

Your lips pressed into a thin line. You struggled to hold Felix's gaze, but he asked, and you've never spoken about this to anyone, not even Jisung, who's known you since before Hyunjin even re-entered your life. You don't know why you never spoke about it, maybe it was time.

“Alright, let's get some snacks and something to drink, I might get emotional.”

○●♡☆♡●○

You sniffled as you curled yourself further under your fluffy comforter, makeup smearing against your pillow - you didn't care, you were too heartbroken. Tonight was supposed to be the best date of your teenage life, never would you have thought someone from Hyunjins untouchable circle would take any kind of interest in you, you always assumed they thought too highly of themselves based on how they acted in the halls. Turns out you were right.

You had planned this night for days. All dressed up in the new outfit you had gotten at the mall with Jisung and his girlfriend, even tentatively donning the pretty lingerie set you had snuck off to buy in the event things got heated and felt right. Your parents weren't home, set to be gone until some time tomorrow afternoon. You had made a simple dinner and picked out a few movies to possibly rent in the event the night stayed chaste. Everything was all set, yet as time ticked by, you began to worry. When your dates' appointed arrival time came and went, you began to get nervous, texting him and Hyunjin in an attempt to get ahold of the elusive boy.

You weren't expecting Hyunjin to be able to do much, he had mentioned he had plans of his own and would check in whenever he had the time, but so far he had only been able to reply twice - both times before your date was even meant to begin. At least Hyunjin managed to reply at all. You had debated over calling Jisung, but you very much didn't want to deal with the embarrassment of admitting you may have gotten stood up because he was so against the date in the first place, only helping because you expressed it was something you really wanted. Maybe you should call your date? Not wanting to seem clingy and give him the benefit of the doubt you simply assumed his phone had died or something of the sort, leading you to lay on the couch to wait for him, eating chocolate and ice cream with some random YouTube videos playing to fill the dead air as you scrolled social media. That's when you saw it.

You had followed this boy on Instagram a little bit ago, hanging on his every post as a way to glean more knowledge of him, but at this moment you wished you didn't even know about his Instagram page at all. There, at the very top of your feed, was a carousel of images of him at a party, an impossibly gorgeous girl clinging to him like shrink wrap.

A burn scorched your throat as it tightened, your heart dropping to your stomach. Hot, angry tears welled in your eyes as, stupidly, you tapped on his profile picture and pulled up his stories, the time stamp indicating he posted only minutes ago. He looked like he was having so much fun, especially with that girl who was showing up often. The final nail in the coffin was when you saw your would-be date's final story, where - presumably - one of his friends had filmed him explicitly licking whipped cream off the girl's chest. Broken and disgusted, you aggressively dashed away your phone, escaping your room to wallow in your sorrows. You stayed there, sobbing, until you had no more tears to give, seeking solace within the plush embrace of your bed.

You were unsure when you started debating over cleaning up, maybe eating the dinner you made - no point in letting good food go to waste. You had only just managed to sit upright in your bed when you heard the tell-tale sign of a fist thrashing against your door, frequent ringing of your doorbell accompanying. The barrage of noise startled you into place, and you thought about pretending you weren't even home, but the sounds of a well-known voice shouting through the wood eased your nerves.

“Y/N? Beautiful, it's me, open up!!” Hyunjins strained voice shouted, screaming at the top of his lungs in hopes you would be able to hear him regardless of wherever you were hiding in the house.

Wordlessly, you made your way from your bed to the front door, turning on the front light so he knew you were there.

“Hyunjin, what are you-?”

“I'm gonna kill that fucking ass-hole,” Hyunjin growled through grit teeth the moment you opened the door, cutting you off by placing his hands on either side of your face. He could feel his temper rising as he took in your smudged makeup and red, puffy eyes. Despite his rough tone he held your face so gently that you almost began to cry again. “I swear to you, I didn't know he was going to do this.”

“I know it wasn't your fault Jinnie…” you breathed, attempting to remain collected enough to not give into your heartbreak. It wasn't enough, as soon as you opened your mouth to reassure him another sob tore from you and you were once again lost. Hyunjin didn't bat an eye, wrapping himself around you and holding you so tightly it felt as though he was the only thing even remotely keeping you together.

“I knew it was too good to be true, but I still believed that he might like me. That, maybe, I had a chance. God, I feel so stupid, Hyunjin!” You clung to Hyunjins denim jacket as you wailed shamelessly into the collar, “and… and when I saw his stories, how this girl was glued to him… it's dumb and I know I deserve better, but I still couldn't help but wonder why couldn't that be me? Did he think I wasn't good enough, not hot enough? What am I missing that I'm so undesirable to him?”

“Y/N stop,” Hyunjins hands were once again at your face, drawing your gaze to his. “You're beautiful, you know you are. Just because this guy doesn't see it, that doesn't mean it's not true. Hell, you even just said that you know you deserve better.” he said gently, pressing his forehead to yours. “God I'm so fucking angry,” he muttered more to himself than anything, squeezing his eyes shut. How dare this prick of a “friend” hurt you like this, in the exact same way he did?

“I know… I know I deserve better, I'm not ugly, but it's so hard to feel like I'm pretty, that I'm desirable at all, when guys keep rejecting me.”

“All those guys are idiots.” Hyunjin sighed, “I wish I could show you how desirable you really are,” he said in a whisper, his brows furrowed and eyes squeezing tighter. It hurt him so much to hear you speak like that.

“I love you for wanting that, but… I don't see how you could,” you whimpered, placing your hands over his, your glossy eyes drifting over his pained features. Was it just the harsh shadows from the front light, or did he have a couple of bruises on his face?

“I can think of one way,” Hyunjin said, his voice coming out small, almost shy. This surprised you. You couldn't remember the last time he came off as shy.

“What do you mean, Jinnie?” You asked in an equally soft tone, your curiosity and fear of spooking him out of sharing his idea overtaking the uncertainty of the possible bruises on his face.

Hyunjins eyes open slowly, his gaze unreadable. You didn't know what it was, but something about the intensity of his stare made you flush, rendering you speechless. Eventually, the longer you looked, the better you could see it - the internal war he was having with himself. Whatever his thought was, he was unsure over whether or not to follow through. For Hyunjin, he was unsure if this would help or if it was even something you needed. He was worried that after what happened to him tonight, he was focusing too much over what he needed.

“Are you not going to tell me?” You finally asked, trying to goad him into fussing up, “did you change your mind?”

“No, I just… I don't want to upset you.”

“Sounds like you have something risky in mind.”

“That's putting it lightly,” he chuckled, ghosting his thumb over your cheek. “I don't think we'd be the same after, and that scares me, I don't want you to shut me out, Beautiful.”

“Just do it, Jinnie. I know that regardless of whatever you have in mind, you just want to help. I could never be upset at you for that.”

“Are you sure?” He rasped, snaking one of his arms around your waist. Your pulse thudded at his actions, but after a stiff swallow, you nodded anyway.

“I'm sure Hyunjin, I trust you.”

Hyunjins eyes became hooded as he scanned your face, his lower lip catching between his teeth as he tipped your chin up with the hand that wasn't increasing its grip on your waist. You stopped breathing as Hyunjin ran his thumb over your lower lip, taking in the softness of your skin before delving in for a bite.

You whimpered at the gentle sting as he tugged at your lower lip, eyes screwed shut and hands clutching at his tear stained denim jacket. Before you could even question what was happening, Hyunjins' other arm wrapped around you, pulling your body hard against his as he tilted his head to kiss you properly. Your head spun. All you could focus on was his soft, plush, lips, and warm breath.

A squeal sneaked out of you when Hyunjin licked your lower lip, allowing him to slip between your lips when you gasped in surprise. You put up no fight, allowing him to roam as he pleased. You were so lost in everything about him, his touch, his smell, his taste. It was as if you were caught in a current drifting you further out to sea. Was this why every girl in town wanted a chance just to spend a night with him? Or was he so good because he got around? He was just kissing you, and you could feel your excitement stirring. How did it feel to do more than just kiss him? Wanting to know you released your grip on his jacket, slipping your hands beneath the collar.

Hyunjin shuttered at your cool touch, a stark contrast to the hot skin of his neck. Goosebumps raised as he felt you slip his jacket off of him, and he released your waist to help you along, dropping the fabric by the front door and kicking off his shoes. He was so focused that he let out a small noise of surprise when you slipped your hands under the hem of his shirt, hands resting on his abdomen.

“Y/N,” he murmured against your lips, chuckling when you refused to stop kissing him. Running a hand into your hair, he held on gently as he pulled away, full on grinning when your lips tried to chase after him, “easy there, girl.”

“Why'd you stop?” You softly whined, somewhat out of breath, a pout on your sweet lips.

“I just don't want to keep this up right by the front door, I keep thinking your parents are going to catch us or something,” Hyunjin said light heartedly, his eyes still lingering on your lips. He already wanted to kiss you again.

“Then…” you began, feeling shy at what you were about to suggest, “my room?”

“Your room,” Hyunjin agreed, lifting you from the floor and carrying your giggly self to your bed. Tearing off his flannel and climbing on top of you, he finally took a moment to take in your outfit. His heart sank once he realized this outfit was new, and you looked absolutely stunning in it. How dare your date not come to see how much effort you put in for tonight. Hyunjins hands clenched at your sheets as he told himself that at least you wouldn't have dressed up for nothing. He wouldn't let your efforts tonight go to waste.

“Hyunjin, are you alright?” Hyunjins eyes met yours, and he leaned in to place a kiss to the tip of your nose.

“I'm just nervous, I didn’t think you'd take it this far.”

“I didn't either,” you admitted, suddenly unable to look at him, “but I just… I liked what we were doing, how you were making me feel.” Your cheeks burned, but Hyunjin was right. You deserved to feel beautiful, and you were grateful that it was Hyunjin who was making you feel this way. “Hyunjin… I- I want you to keep going… would you… would you be my first?”

Hyunjins’ breath caught in his throat, and in an instant, he no longer felt like the full of confidence school bad boy. Instead, he was just a boy, a boy with his heart hammering in his chest as he looked down at the girl he secretly loved with the widest eyes imaginable.

“Are- Are you sure?” He whispered, the tremor in his voice matching the one shaking his body.

“Yes,” you breathed, finding the courage to look at him again. “I'm sure.”

With a fervored nod of his head, Hyunjin sat up and hastily fumbled for his wallet in his back pocket, praying that he still had a condom tucked away. With relief, he found one. He couldn't stop shaking.

“I'll stop whenever you tell me to,” Hyunjin said with a mix of excitement and anxiety, placing the condom next to you on the bed, “you call all the shots. I won't do anything you're not comfortable with, okay?”

Unable to speak, you nodded, taking several deep, steadying breaths as Hyunjin returned above you, wasting no time to kiss you sweetly. You did your best to focus on the moment, on the slant of his lips, the smell of his cologne clinging to his undershirt, of his shaky hand that trailed under your shirt to run his hand over your breast which caused your breath to hitch.

“Y/N, are you wearing lingerie?” Hyunjin murmured. Your hands flew to your face to cover your now tomato red face before he could even finish asking his question. Once again, you were only able to nod. With a groan, Hyunjin, unceremoniously and without warning, pushed your shirt up as far as it would go before sitting back on his haunches and tearing your bottoms off of you. Fuck, to think that good-for-nothing almost saw you in this. “I can't tell you how glad I am to be the only one to see you in this,” he said admiringly, pressing kisses to your knees, then down your inner thighs.

Hyunjin paused for a moment, giving you a chance to stop him before he went any further, but when you remained hiding behind your hands he continued to pepper kisses between your thighs as he worked his way down. With a small smirk, Hyunjin traced the little bow that topped the front of your lace panties. You were a present just for him. He felt grateful, getting something just for him.

Wanting to show just how appreciative he was, Hyunjin spread your legs, slotting his head in between them and placing soft kisses to your covered heat. He relished in your shy, needy whimpers as he ran his fingers up and down your clothed slit, pressing more kisses over your clit as the dampness against your panties worsened.

“I'm going to eat you out first before we do this, baby, I want you relaxed and feeling good before I try sliding in,” he instructed as he pulled your panties down your legs with his teeth and slid his finger over your now exposed slit.

You were already a panting mess from this little bit of stimulation, your hands no longer hiding your face but bunched at your chest as you watched him toy with you. You had never seen this side of Hyunjin before and were getting more and more aroused as he focused on your pleasure. You couldn't take your eyes off him, especially as he rested one of your legs over his shoulder, collecting your wetness on his middle finger before easing it between your folds. He pumped the digit in and out a few times, checking if there was any discomfort before easing in another finger. Your eyes fluttered closed at the filling sensation, savoring the delicious drag of his fingers as they slowly pumped in and out of you. Hyunjin took great care in building you up, exploring which spots were your weakest and prodding at them mercilessly until you were shaking beneath him. Right when you thought the sensation couldn't get more intense, Hyunjins' tongue slid over your sensitive clit, causing your hips to buck. Hyunjin grunted but continued licking and swirling his tongue over the bundle of nerves as his fingers continued to expertly press at your gummy walls. Hyunjin was reading you so well and all you could do was grasp at his hair and cry out pathetic moans beneath him.

Before you could even say anything, your orgasm rapidly built before exploding, your creaminess coating Hyunjins’ tongue and fingers. Your body shuttered, and Hyunjin continued to rub you walls as he helped ease you down.

“That's it, baby, you did so good. Just stay relaxed, okay?” Hyunjin cooed, licking you from his lips and fingers and reaching for the condom, “are you ready?”

“I- I think so,” you stammered out, surprised at yourself for managing to speak. Your head felt so cluttered, unable to believe Hyunjin just made you cum. Hyunjin, the guy you've known since you were a kid and who you've been able to platonically share a bed with. You were almost starting to second guess whether or not you should really go through with this, maybe Hyunjin was right about things changing, maybe it would change too much and you'd lose the closeness you had.

You didn't have time to dwell on these hesitant thoughts, Hyunjin unbuttoning his jeans and beginning to slip them down caught your full attention and you could do nothing but watch with bated breath as his stunning cock sprang free. It was too late. You had passed the point of no return, and there was nothing left to do but indulge, to let yourself dive as deep as you could and let yourself drown.

Or maybe that's just how Hyunjin was seeing it. Tonight did not go as he planned, before he deigned to open social media - all the while hiding in a tube slide at a child's park - he had gotten hurt, he was on the run, in overlapping shades of pain, his only solace being that at least you were having a good night with one of his friends. When Hyunjin had seen that the guy had ditched you for a party and some other girl, he couldn't think of a worse end to his night than leaving you to ache alone. So he ran to you, risking himself further with the exposure, but he didn't matter at that moment. He would swallow everything down, just for a chance to lift your spirits, he could deal with his own pain later, he just needed to help you otherwise he didn't think he could last the night.

He truly wasn't thinking of himself when he kissed you, Hyunjin only wanted to do whatever he could to prove to you that you are worthy of being wanted. But when you pulled him close, when you wanted more, Hyunjin realized he needed the same thing - only in a slightly different way.

Tonight had been horrible for you and Hyunjin before he came to you. He was not going to let the sun rise without something good happening for the both of you not realizing that the moment he took your hand in his, both sets of clothes now discarded on your bedroom floor, lips and tongues melting together as his protected head teasing your entrance, that he was giving the both of you the thing you wanted from each other the most.

It hurt, of course, but Hyunjin was gentle. Easing himself in and out in sections, going inch by inch and refusing to push deeper until you were accustomed. He didn't want you to cry. He refused to make you bleed, and when he finally finally bottomed out, you thought you were going to faint from how shallow your breathing was.

“Breath, baby, breath,” he whispered, kissing you tenderly, “I won't move until you breathe.”

“Hyunjin…” you whined, wrapping your arms around his neck and drinking in his gentle attention. “It's okay, you can move, it doesn't hurt,” you reassured. With a few more kisses, Hyunjin rested his forehead for yours before he slowly rolled his hips into yours.

You squeezed your eyes shut, the sensation - while not entirely painful - felt foreign, and you struggled to acclimate quickly, but you refused to let him stop. You knew you just needed to ride this out, that it would get better, and it did. You could feel your body accepting him and soon wanting more.

“Jinnie… more, it's not enough, more,” you mewled, wrapping your legs around his waist in an attempt to draw him closer.

“Okay, Beautiful, I'll take care of you. Just lay back, Jinnie will make you feel good,” Hyunjin murmured, pressing kissing into your neck and picking up his pace, earning himself a few sweet moans.

It was only when all tension left your body that Hyunjin dared to truly let himself enjoy you. Adjusting so he was on his knees, he pulled your legs up, holding each behind your knees as he began to truly fuck himself into you. Hyunjin watched as your sweet, shy moans turned into heated, wanton screams as he plowed into your gummy spot. Never did he think he would see you make such a gorgeous face or hear your pussy make such filthy squelching sounds as his dick slipped in and out of you. For a moment, Hyunjin thought he was dreaming as he watched you drown in bliss below him. If he was, he never wanted to wake up. He wanted to stay right here, in this too-good-to-be-true moment where all the worries from hours ago purged themselves from his mind.

“Hyun… Jin… Jinnie…” you gasped out, feeling the pressure from your building orgasm start to grow.

“Does it feel good, Beautiful? Are you gonna cum?” He asked in ragged breaths.

“Yes… yes, I think I'm close. Oh, please don't stop,” you begged, closing your eyes and throwing your head back onto your pillow. Almost as soon as you finished uttering those words, your body clenched around him as you came for the second time, a creamy ring coating Hyunjins dick.

“Fuck, baby,” Hyunjin groaned, slamming his dick into you more rapidly as he chased his own orgasm.

Feeling his hips beginning to stutter, you forced your tired eyes to open just in time to watch Hyunjins’ beautiful face twist in pleasure as he came, melodic moans bouncing off your walls. You did your best to memorize that face as he came down from his high.

After a moment of catching his breath, Hyunjin eased himself out of you to remove the condom, your body giving a shudder at the lack of his body heat.

“Let's clean up, yeah?” Hyunjin suggested, helping you up from the bed and leading the two of you to the bathroom. The following intimate moments of clean-up felt oddly comfortable and right. Once your post-orgasm bliss had faded, you expected an air of awkwardness to be lingerie around you both, but there never was.

“Hey, can I wear your flanel?”

“What?” Hyunjin asked with a laugh.

“That's what always happens in the movies. The girl wears the guys clothes after sex. I kinda wanna try it.”

“Just for a bit? That's dumb,” he replied but handed you his flannel anyway as he grabbed the rest of his clothes to put back on.

You needed to change out of your lingerie set, so you opted to wear nothing but his flannel, a comfort pair of panties, and some knee-high socks. You wanted to wear his shirt for the bit, so you were going to commit. Besides, he had officially seen too much for you to be shy at this point.

“Was this food meant to be for tonight?” Hyunjins voice called from the kitchen. You didn't notice he had left your room since he didn't bother to shut the door.

“Yeah,” you replied as you joined him in the dimly lit kitchen, missing his double take and blushing at your choice in attire. “I was actually going to come eat it before you showed up. It's meant for two, want some, or have you eaten?”

“I haven't. Go rest, I'll heat this up.” With a smile, you nodded, leaning up to place a peck on his still tinted cheek.

“Thank you for coming tonight, Jinnie. I needed it.”

“Yeah, of course, Beautiful,” he said as you walked into the living room, “I needed it too…” he added, but you were too far to hear.

It didn't take long for the food to be reheated and soon the two of you were nestled on the couch together, sharing a blanket in the dark living room as one of the movies you had picked out for tonight played.

“In a way, I'm kind of glad the jackass never showed up, I got to have this date with you instead,” Hyunjins said rather sincerely. It made your heart flutter.

“I'm glad too. He set you up to come to my rescue and make my night better. Maybe even better than if he had actually shown up.”

“Do you really mean that?” Hyunjin asked, his heart melting as he set down his plate to pull you close and nuzzle you, “awwwww you're too sweet!”

“Alright, alright, that's enough!” You laughed, pushing his face from yours. You had meant the gesture to be light-hearted, but your nerves spiked the instant Hyunjins head shot back in recoil, giving a small hiss of pain. “Oh my god, Hyunjin, are you okay? I'm sorry, I didn't mean-”

“No, no, no, it's ok,” he reassured, his hand hovering over his eye as if he wanted to soothe the skin but feared touching it.

“Are you sure? Let me see,” you attempted to get closer, but Hyunjins long arm held you back.

“I'm fine, Y/N, let's just watch the movie.”

You blinked at him before frowning and attempted to lunge at him again.

“Hyunjin, what are you hiding from me?”

“Nothing!” He said a little too defensively. Not in the mood to play games, you stood from the couch and walked off. Hyunjin assumed this was you pouting but ultimately dropped the matter, how wrong he was.

Stomping to the light switch, you bathed the livingstone in bright light, noticing the completely unsubtle way Hyunjin dove for cover. You weren't letting this slide. Over to the couch, you didn't even attempt to pull away the pillow Hyunjin used to cover his face, instead climbing on top of him and began to tickle his sides. Instantly, his body began to jerk and wiggle, but he was adamant on not letting you see his face. However, he was struggling to handle your body on top of him and soon had no choice but to tip the both of you off the couch in an attempt to ease the ache.

This did not work in his favor. Easily catching yourself, you now stood over him, the small fall making him release his grip on the pillow just enough for you to yank it from his hands.

Your arms paused as you held the pillow mid-air in shock. Your eyes weren't playing tricks earlier. It wasn't just a trick of the light. Blooming across his cheek bone and at the corner of his lips were two bruises, and there was even a small cut near his brow that would easily be covered by his hair, were he not on his back.

“Hyunjin, what happened to you…?” You breathed, dropping the pillow. Slowly dropping to your knees, you sat on Hyunjins hips, keeping him pinned in place so he couldn't escape.

Hyunjin didn't answer. He couldn’t even meet your eyes as your fingers barely ghosted over the discolored skin. Without realizing it, you dropped your hand on his side, only to snap your hand away when he flinched in pain. You sat as still as a statue for a few moments before reaching down and lifting his shirt, showing more discoloration.

You felt horrible. How could you not notice? How could you not see? The instant the thought popped into your head, realization hit you.

“This is why you didn't want to be by the front door… with the light right on you. You didn't worry in my room cause the lights were off, and in the bathroom and kitchen too… There was only dim lighting. It was so I couldn't see.” The look of guilt on Hyunjins face was all you needed to confirm that you were right. He was hiding this from you, but why? What happened to your Hyunjin that he came to you so hurt?

“Please don't cry, beautiful. You've already cried so much tonight.”

“Then tell me what happened,” you said firmly.

Hyunjins lips pressed together, he didn't want to open up, he especially didn't want to ruin the special evening you two were just having together. But he knew you wouldn't let this slide, and if he was honest… someone about the way you were dressed brought him back to the surprising feeling of comfort he felt while being in bed with you.

“... okay,” he eventually relented, gingerly sitting up and bumping noses with you. “But kiss me first.”

“Huh?”

“Just… please.”

He sounded so tired and defeated. Wanting nothing more than to swallow up all his pain, you didn't hesitate again, wrapping your arms around his neck and bushing your lips over his.

Hyunjin kissed you back desperately, wrapping his arms around you and holding on to you. If he didn't, he felt he would fall apart, a stark contrast to the way he held you in your doorway. You didn't realize when his hand had slipped under his flanel until his nails raked over your back, raising goosebumps in their wake as his hands traveled between your bodies.

“Hyunjin,” you called, pulling from his lips. He didn't stop, his lips dropping to your neck the moment you pulled away. “Hyunjin,” you said again, attempting to sound more stern with little success. You were melting under his touch again.

“I just want to feel you against me,” he mumbled against your skin, unbuttoning the flannel and opening it just enough to expose you, but not take it off completely. He then pulled back, once again pulling off his tee before leaning back into you, his arms snaking around you under his shirt and his face buried in the crook of your neck.

You two stayed stationery in that position for a few moments, the only sound coming from your forgotten move. Not knowing what else to do for Hyunjin, at that moment, you slid your fingers into his hair and scratched gently at his skull. Only then did Hyunjin finally relax. He finally felt the same warmth, safety, and intimacy from earlier, making it easier for him to finally explain what happened.

You weren't the only one heartbroken that night. Hyunjin had gotten involved with an older woman. He was really having fun with her. He thought she actually cared about him. She made him feel like somebody. But right when he thought things were going great, that's when everything went wrong.

What was supposed to be a normal night together turned into him finding out she was married in the worst way possibly, with her husband catching them getting hot and heavy together and beating the shit out of Hyunjin for messing around with someone he shouldn't. The guy wouldn't even believe Hyunjin when he said he didn't know the woman was married.

Turns out this woman has a history of luring young, hot guys to her with tons of spoiling and praise, only to then have her way with them until her husband finds out and beats the shit out of the poor boy. Rinse and repeat, right up to Hyunjin. The latest in a line of victims.

Hyunjin managed to get away but never before had he felt so cheap and pathetic, this wasn't the first time a girl slept with him for her own gain but sometimes about this time just made him feel so… worthless. It brought tears to his eyes to admit this, and he clung to you tightly as he cried.

You've never known Hyunjin could cry so hard, and it broke your heart to learn that this happened to him, but you were also proud of him. He said he never intended on telling anyone and that he was just going to hold on to this until the day he died, but he didn't. He told you, he let it out, and even though it broke your heart to see him like this, you wanted him to always talk to someone, even if it wasn't you. You also promised that you would do whatever it took to make him comfortable enough to open up, that while you couldn't fix his problems, you could be his safe place.

“It's funny, but… this is what we're doing right now. It's what I need. This is my safe place,” Hyunjin admitted, his lips tickling your collar bone.

“The skin contact??” By now you and Hyunjin had made your way back to your bed, settling in under the covers, each of you wearing next to nothing so Hyunjin could feel as much of you against him as possible.

“Kinda, just… the intimacy of it all. If I could, I'd be buried inside you again. I want to be as close to you as I can. It makes me feel like I'm not worthless. It makes me feel wanted.”

“Having your dick in someone makes you feel wanted?” You teasingly asked with a giggle.

“No, baby,” Hyunjin replied with a laugh, lifting his head from your chest to fix you with a soft stare. “I only feel like this because it's you. The only girl I've shared years of my life and my darkest secrets. The only girl who trusts me so much she'd ask me to be her first and who loves me enough to sit in and listen to my problems the same night.” You were too stunned to speak, but you were sure Hyunjin could see just how red your face was. “You're my closest and most trusted friend, Y/N. I think sex and stuff like that will only feel this special, this safe and warm, with you.” It was also because Hyunjin was secretly in love with you too, but he decided to keep that part to himself, he wanted to enjoy this moment, this look on your face, for just a little while longer.

“I… I think so too, Hyun. It won't ever mean the same with anyone else,” you said, decidingly also refusing to admit the feelings you've been harboring for Hyunjin.

A sweet smile spread across Hyunjin's face, his eyes curving into crescents. You knew you were essentially digging your own grave, dooming yourself to what you assumed was going to be a mainly physical relationship, but you couldn't bring yourself to care. Not when Hyunjin looked so irresistible and said such endearments, snuggling against you and showering your skin with kisses, leading you two to get lost in each other again until you fell asleep in each other's arms, only for him to cling to you the all throughout the next morning. If you could just have more moments like this with him, it would all be worth it. Anything to be the safe space for the boy you were so desperately in love with.

○●☆♡☆●○

“So that's it, that's how you and Hyunjin became, well, you and Hyunjin. You were in love with him, and you were his security blanket.”

“I mean, kinda,” you replied, polishing off the last of your water bottle and opening another. “Sex with me, at least at the beginning, meant so much to him because I was someone who really cared about him. He never had to doubt if I was doing things with him for clout or for some sick kick. That gave him a sense of safety, and it gave him space to open up. And I was only too eager to please cause not only was I completely in love with him, but he did mean so much to me beyond that. He was a friend who put everything aside, even his own issues, to look out for me.”

“Which is why you feel bad you can't be as close to him as you used to be and why when he keeps things to himself, it bothers you so much.”

“Exactly.” Heaving a deep sigh, you rummaged through your pile of trash to hopefully find an unopened piece of candy. Meanwhile, Felix sat silently next to you, feeling sympathetic to your situation.

“I take it you and Changbin haven't talked about any of this?” Felix asked tentatively, making you pause your search.

“... No, I'm not even sure if it's worth bringing up,” you admitted, laying back against Felix's mattress and watching his ceiling fan turn. “It was such a big part of my life, but it's over now. I made my choice, and I chose myself. I'm finally with someone who's as much mine as I am theirs. I don't want to throw a wrench into things by telling him about something that ended before we even got together.”

“So you have no regrets then?”

“None. I'm happy with Changbin, even if I don't get to see him as often as I like.”

Just then, the sound of Chan's door opening and closing caught yours and Felix's attention. It was the first time you've heard any noise coming from him since you even got to the boys' shared apartment, and upon checking the time, you noticed that it was already 11 in the evening.

“Hey, how often do you get to see Bin?” Felix asked.

“Barely… I see him just slightly more often than I see my own roommate.”

“I hardly see my roommate anymore either,” Felix said, a deep sense of dread building in him. “How… How long has it been since you and Bin started dating?” You swallowed hard at his question, choosing instead to focus on the sound of Chan rustling through the kitchen before returning to his room. You knew where Felix was going with this.

“It's only been a little over a month.”

A tense silence settled between the two of you, neither one of you daring to say it. But you knew what he was thinking. You could feel the worry radiating off of Felix's slender body, seeping into your bones. You had essentially severed your deepest and longest lasting relationship to be with Changbin, and now, due to one stroke of chance you barely get to see him and can't even turn to the person from your second longest lasting relationship for aid.

What's going to happen to your freshly established relationship if this demand for 3racha keeps going? How will you survive not being able to see, not only your boyfriend, but one of your best friends who championed your budding connection to said boyfriend? Especially when the only deep connection you had left was someone you were desperately attempting to put space around?

These worries troubled you. Long after Felix's attempts to sedate them, long after you bid him good night and drove yourself home, and long after, you readied yourself inside your all too silent apartment and clambered into bed. You had been so happy for 3racha, so determined to support them, but now all that lingered over head was the fact that in one fleeting moment you realized you no longer had the steady foundation built by the three most precious people in your life.

---------------------------------------

Well... this chapter certainly ended up taking on a life of its own, and as I mentioned in this post, it ended up coming to mean a bit more to me than the other chapters.

Anyway, I had intended on this to be a bonus chapter, but I thought it flowed better as part of the main story. I'm getting better at placing the back stories/flashbacks.

If you go back to the first couple of chapters, you can see I was formatting the story differently. I was struggling with the build-up of the story and then found my stride in later chapters. If I allow myself to be a bit delulu for a moment, if i ever get my E. L. James or Anna Todd moment, I'd definitely go back and re-write those beginning segments.

Taglist: @groovygroovyhyunjin @hhwangsmoon @luvyblossom @doggezz@kayleefriedchicken @hyunjinhoexxx

[snwycde]

Connected (Bang Chan) part 5

Pairing: BangChan x fem reader

wc: 1.6k

warnings‼️: MDNI, mentions of s*xual thoughts in the beginning (continuation of part 4)

summary: slow burn of Chan and fem reader. Chan runs into his past, how will it affect the present and his future?

This is part 5!!!

-----

Chan hops into the shower, he’s usually not one for morning showers but - well due to the circumstances he’s been given, he doesn’t really have a choice.

I haven’t seen her in like three weeks. What the hell? Chan rinses his body, trying not to think of how vivid his dream felt. “Fuck,” he says out loud getting mad because he’s starting to get hard again. He reaches and turns on the cold water.

---

“Chan hyung, where are you going?” Jeongin as he sits on the couch watching, “The studio is closed this week for remodeling.”

“Fuck, right.” Chan stands for a minute thinking, “Thanks for the reminder Innie.”

Chan waves at Jeongin before leaving the dorm. He walks to the car and heads off from there. If you’re wondering where he’s going well…

---

Connections. The sign shines, being hit by the sunlight as he parks outside of the cafe. 

He’s just here to eat some breakfast while working on some beats for his song, his song that he desperately needs to start on. But yeah, that’s the only reason. Not to wait and see if you’ll arrive at your family owned cafe. To sit down in your favorite spot, and work on whatever you need to work on.

Chan orders the same thing, but includes a toasted sandwich this time since he’s starving. As he waits for his drink and food to arrive, he pulls out his laptop and sets up his area. When he turns on his laptop he remembers, Right. Wifi.

As if someone read his mind, “The wifi passcode is magnets, all lowercase,” they set down a drink, their drink. Chan looks up to see you taking a seat right across from him.

“Look, I know this is a public business, but out of all cafes in Seoul, you decide on this one. Why?” You look cold, not the emotional self you were three weeks ago, it puts Chan on edge, unsure of how to respond.

“Hi Miss L/N, how are you doing?” A server comes up to place Chan’s drink and sandwich down, “Would you like your usual?”

Y/n nods and says thank you, sending the server off.

“I just like it here, am I not allowed to come here?” it isn’t a lie technically, he does like the cafe, but was it the full truth maybe not, “Also paparazzi aren’t allowed to come in here or in this district” he added, trying to save himself.

Y/n doesn’t seem relieved nor mad at Chan’s response; she just looks tired. “I want to talk about last time,” she places her drink down, “Can we talk about it?”

Chan does want to talk about it but he doesn’t and the fact that she brought it up so suddenly and that he wasn’t expecting it makes him say, “I don’t really know what’s there to talk about.”

Y/n makes a face, like “really?”, except instead of being annoyed she just seems disappointed, “You always hated confrontation.”

Chan just looks at Y/n not sure what to say, his silence annoys Y/n.

“Fine then. You listen and I’ll talk, okay?” Chan nods.

“I really don’t want to hate you. I want us to be able to move on happily with our lives with no hate for each other.” Y/n looks at Chan to see if he’ll say something, he just nods. “I think I was probably intoxicated and I was also in an emotional state last time you saw me. It was all just bad timing. I had no idea you’d be at the bar at the same time as me, especially… well yeah.”

“Yeah.” is all Chan gets out, trying to pretend like he didn’t follow her to the bar.

“In the car, I meant everything.”

That makes Chan look at you, “what do you mean?”

“Everything.” You play with your hands, you’re more nervous now, “I meant to get mad and irritated at you. I’m not going to deny my feelings just because you don’t agree with them. I don’t know or think you reflected on our conversation as much as I did but I know I got loud but it was just because it felt like you weren’t listening to me. And I know you technically don’t have to listen to me because like you said, we’re not dating.“ Y/n pauses to make eye contact with Chan, “I just had some pent up emotions that I just never got rid of and it was eating at me. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you when you’ve moved on.”

Chan doesn’t look away, “Y/n?”

She looks up at him, “yeah?”

“Did you mean it when you said I was the love of your life?”

Y/n forces a smile, and a pink flush shows onto her cheeks, she calms herself down quickly before answering with, “I mean, no shame in it, but yeah.” She picks up her drink right after, then continues talking.

But Chan can’t hear anything because he’s still thinking about it, “Why did you never tell me that?”

“What?” Y/n looks irritated that you interrupted her, but confused.

“Why didn’t you..you tell me I was the love of your life?” Chan hasn’t touched his food or drink.

“Because by the time I knew, I realized you didn’t think the same for me.” she sits up in her seat, “and no offense Chan, but I’m not one of your fans who’ll easily give you their heart and soul just because you say I love you to me. You can say that you loved me so much but your actions were lacking. It just wasn’t eno–”

“I love you. I mean I loved you.” Chan blurts out.

Y/n looks at him, quite shocked.

“You – I-I did love you, so much. Too much. ”

“Chan I need you to stop,” Y/n suddenly looking sad.

“No, come on now, listen it’s my turn to speak,” Chan places his hands flat on the table, “I loved you too much. It was indescribable. From the first time I met you here. I fell in love with you. And every single interaction after that I knew you were going to be the love of my life.”

Y/n looks around not being able to respond, nervous.

“Every time I saw you, you would pull me in. Like,” Chan stops, “...magnets.”

Chan looks into Y/n’s eyes, “did you make the password here?”

“Chan, it was made a long time ago.” She shrugs it off.

“No, I came here once a year ago, and the password was some random plant name.” Chan suddenly has more life into the words he’s saying.

“It’s just a word.” Y/n doesn’t look him in the eyes.

“Y/n, look at me.”

She doesn’t.

“What if we try again.” Chan isn’t asking, he’s stating.

You look up at him, “What?”

“I-I can’t stop thinking about you. You’re in my dreams, especially since I first saw you last month at the ice skating rink, you’ve been on my mind.”

“Chan stop.”

“No Y/n, come on, I know we have some things to fix between us, but you have to feel it too. Every time we see eachother we are pulled to eachother. Like magnets. That was our joke remember?” Chan’s just ranting now, he’s speaking so much more than he has in years. “We said we are total opposites, but we loved eachother. We were magnets, pulled together to be connected.”

“Y/n.” Chan gets you to look in his eyes for a moment, “I want to try again. I-I want you, I don’t what it is but I know it has to be you,”

Y/n’s eyes get watery but she scoffs, “Chan you’re not being fair right now.”

“Is this not what you wanted? For me to communicate how I’m feeling?”

“It’s too late for that Chan.”

“No, no it’s not, Y/n,” Chan takes both of your hands into his and looks you in the eyes, “I still love you.”

Chan watches as a tear drops down Y/n’s face, as she pulls her hands away, “I don’t think you understand how hurtful that was.”

“What?” Chan watches as she starts to stand up taking her drink, “Y/n –”

“Look, I wanted to say thank you for the ride and for the situation I was in with my boyfriend. I seemed –”

“Wait boyfriend?”

“Yes, please don't interrupt me.”

“You mean ex boyfriend?”

A bell rings saying that someone entered, making Y/n look over, Chan’s eyes following hers. 

A guy smiles and waves at her, and walks over to her, seeing Chan his face drops. 

“Hi Jaebum,” Chan hears you say softly to him before turning back to Chan, “Chan this is my boyfriend, Jaebum. Jaebum, this is my old friend… Chan. ”

“Hi we met briefly before, and I spoke with Y/n and I just wanted to apologize for my behavior.” Jaebum softly bows, “I’m really sorry, and thank you for taking care of her in that moment when it should’ve been me.” Jaebum looks at Chan.

Chan is silent, unsure of what to say, just looking at him.

“Jae, do you think you can wait in the car? I’ll be right out.” He nods before saying bye to Chan which Chan lazily waved back.

After Y/n sees Jaebum leave, she looks at Chan, “Look –”

“That guy is your boyfriend? Still?” 

“Chan don’t act like you know anything.”

“Do you love him?”

“You don’t get to ask that.”

“No, tell me right now,” he stands up, his figure leaning over you, “Tell me you love him.”

“You don’t deserve to know that.”

“Tell me you love him more than me.”

“Chan!” She looks at you in disbelief, “I-I have to go. I’m leaving. Goodbye.”

She leaves him quickly, leaving him standing next to his table, watching her as she walks out the doors.

author's note: im so so so so so sorry for taking so long to make a part 5. please forgive me college has been a huge bitch to me lately. thank you so much for your patience and i promise i will never take that long again to post an update on this story or any story without announcement 😔