#single parent Rhys

[captainjimothycarter]

Okay but was no one going to tell me rhys darby was in single parents as the drama teacher?

[cressidagrey]

It's a Love Story - Chapter 8

Summary:

Azriel's shadows find their master a wife.

Azriel would just really like his heart not to get broken again.

And Sky...well, she's just really surprised that that far too handsome male is interested in her at all.

Warning:

Rhys Bashing (as usual), I classified this as Azriel x OC, even when it't technically Azriel x Sellyn Drake (but we kinda know nothing about Sellyn Drake other than that she writes books so Sky is kinda an OC), Cassian is kinda a good guy for once, Azriel has a horrible time, as usual... Stuttering, toxic families (For once I do not mean the IC), Self-Esteem Issues, Secret Identity, Body Image Issues, Fat Shaming, People being utterly horrible. Racism against Illyrians/Lesser Faes?

If any of this triggers you or makes you uncomfortable, please take care of your own mental health and don't read it.

Sky didn’t have much of a temper.

Even if she was frustrated or annoyed, she rarely got angry or lost her patience. 

It wasn't that she didn't have emotions. She did. She felt things deeply, passionately. However, she also believed that there was no point in wasting energy on getting angry. It didn't solve anything. It only made things worse. 

So Sky had learned a very, very long time ago…that there was no need to start screaming, because her stutter didn’t allow her that anyway…and that maybe…maybe it was easier for her to just let go off her anger about being unfairly treated. 

Getting angry wouldn’t help her. 

That day however…it burst out of her. Burst out of her like somebody had lanced an abscess. 

Her family could say whatever they wanted about her. But they were not going to say a single word about Azriel 

It was Winter Solstice.

Azriel and her had spent the last month or so enjoying winter season in Velaris…even once trying to ice skate on their lake, which only ended with him kissing her skinned knees, because she was definitely not a natural at it.

They had bought Winter Solstice gifts, and baked cookies…had decorated their house with pine garlands and velvet ribbons…

She had knitted them socks and they had made rabbit stews out of rabbits Azriel had hunted in the forest behind their house. (It was…she had never really seen him as a warrior, even when he wore these black leathers and the blue stone that glinted off him…but she could see him as a hunter, when he came home with a couple of rabbits, ready for dinner. It had also resulted in a new fur lined blanket for her, all ready on the couch. 

She had never outright asked…but he seemd to like it when she was cuddled beneath it, like it seemed to soothe some kind of instinct for him. Maybe the fact that it was the animal he had hunted?)   

Sky and Azriel had both made the decision to spend the days with their respective families and have their own Solstice celebrations the next day…that would pretty much sonsits out of a lazy day in bed and nothing else. 

It sounded amazing. Just what they wanted. 

And it had made sense to celebrate like that. She hadn’t wanted to be the one to keep him from his family after all, even if the thought of not spending Solstice with her mate had hurt more than she wanted to admit.

Azriel had been up ridiculous easily in the morning for a snowball fight that was apparently tradition…but not before he had spent a good half hour making her scream his name with his mouth between her thighs…

Afterwards, she had gotten dressed and left the shadows to amuse Hector for the day… and Sky had left to help her mother with dinner preparations.

A nice, quiet family dinner. Nothing more and nothing less.

That’s what it was supposed to be. They didn’t even get that far.

It all went to shit before dinner was even in the oven. 

From the moment she entered her parents house it was a barrage of barbed comments. About her appearance, her stutter, her lack of an boyfriend…her lack of a proper job. (Sellyn Drake was hers. Sellyn Drake was nothing they got to gossip about.) 

Sky had bitten her tongue. She had ignored the comments, tried to enjoy herself. But Claire never knew when enough was enough.

Her sister kept at it. Kept needling, jabbing at Sky until the little bubbles of anger popped to the surface and boiled into something…bigger.

“I…I met my m…mate,” Sky finally said flatly, after anther jab at her lack of a boyfriend. 

Take that Claire. Not just a fiance. A mate. 

Finally in just one thing Sky had been faster than her sister. 

A mate. That mystical rare mating bond had been a gift from the other for her and not for Claire. 

It caught Claire off guard. She stopped pacing, and turned to look at her sister, brow raised. The look said ‘Oh is that so?’ as if it was the kind of nonsense she had come to expect from her.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed, clearly not believing a word Sky said. 

But Sky wasn’t going to let this go. “His n..name is Azriel,” Sky said with a smile. “We are ver…very hap…happy.” 

They were. They were so happy. So delightfully happy. (So delightfully happy that Sky had been wondering if maybe…maybe the should start trying. High Fae fertility was hit or miss anyway…why shouldn’t they simply start trying and see where it would take them. And if it took two decades, then it took two decades. If it only took a year or three…well, then they were lucky.)  

Claire narrowed her eyes. She was about to say something mean, Sky could see it in the way her lip curled up.

“He…He's a g…good male,” she said firmly, cutting Claire off before she got the chance to spew out anything else.

Claire laughed. It was a harsh, biting sound.

"A good male? Really, Sky?" she sneered. "You actually fell for that line?"

It wasn’t a line. It was the truth. 

Azriel was a good male. Patient and intense and loving. He had never raised a single finger against her.Azriel would never hurt her intentionally. 

 Claire just wanted to belittle Sky in front of their whole family.

"You must be even more naive than you seem if you believe that," she said, almost pityingly. "You really think he wants you? That he actually cares about you? Nobody could want you. I bet he just pities you."

It should have hurt her, she realised. It would have. Even just months ago, it would have hurt her. 

But right now…right now it didn’t really. 

She was supposed to believe that Azriel didn’t want her? The same male that had spent the better part of an hour on his knees in front of her that very morning, eating her out like a starved male? She was supposed that her mate, who’s arousal shot across the bond like an inferno any time she slipped off her clothes, didn’t want her? That the same male that stared at her like she was a goddess, that spent hours worshipping her body with his hands…that she had nearly made come simply by touching his wings a few days ago didn’t want her? 

Still…Claire's words had their effect. She felt a small stab of doubt in her heart, and she hated it. She hated that her sister could still hurt her like this, still make her feel like that insecure little girl who stuttered and couldn't get a single word right.

“He…He l…loves me and I…I love him,” Sky said calmly.

That was clear in every single one of his actions, in every single word. 

“Where did you even meet him?” Sky’s mother demanded. “And what kind of name is Azriel?”

“In…In a bar. Wh…When we went out for Cl..Claire’s Hen Do.  And I im…imagine it’s an Il…illyrian name.”

Everything ground to a halt.

“He’s Illyrian?!” Her mother demanded sharply. “What’s wrong with you, Skylar!”

Sky flinched at her tone. It was harsh, angry. It was the same tone she'd always used when Sky was younger and got anything wrong or stepped out of line.

"Yes, he's Il…Illlyrian," she said, meeting her mother's gaze levelly. "What's…what’s wrong with that?" she asked. 

She knew that her family wasn’t the…most open about Lesser Faes, but…but that hatred in her mother’s voice….she hadn’t expected that. 

“Everything,” Admon gave back with a snort. “You seriously let that barbarian fuck you? I am surprised you actually survived that and he didn’t just rip you apart.”

Every bit of colour leeched out of her face, except her ruddy red cheeks at these crude words. 

This was Admon. Once upon a time, she had wanted to marry him. To have his children. To spent her life with him. 

And…and this was what he told her to her face. 

“I can’t believe that you even let a creature like him touch you,” her mother breathed staring at her with utter disgust.

“He’...He’s not a cre…creature,” Sky bit out. Azriel was her mate. 

“Is it true by the way?” Her brother wondered. “That Illyrian’s have a cat’s prick?”

"Orin!" her mother exclaimed, aghast. "Don't be vulgar! I don't want to know."

Orin shrugged, a smirk dancing across his face. "What? I’m just curious. I am sure Skylar knows. She must please him somehow when she’s still alive to enjoy their…couplings.”

Sky felt ill. She didn't know what to say, what to say in defense of the man she loved. She couldn't get a word out.

“Did you…did you let it touch you?” Her father demanded finally, his voice icy.

It. Not even him. It. Like Azriel was a thing. 

Sky felt her heart drop to the floor, breaking into pieces.

"Yes," she admitted, her voice barely audible.

Her father's face grew stony, and he took a step closer to her.

“How dare you?” he hissed. "How could you let a monster touch you like that?"

"He's not a monster!" Sky protested, her voice rising. "He's…He’s k…kind and gen…gentle, and-"

“And I am sure, he keeps you stuffed with his cat prick to keep you satisfied,” Claire drawled.

And Sky was done.

Somehow that was the last straw. 

Somehow that made something inside her break, irreparable. 

It snipped away every thread that ever kept her close to the family that she had been born into. 

“At least I didn’t need to take my sister’s sl…sloppy s…seconds,” Sky said, her voice flat, meeting her gaze full on.“And yes, Azriel more than keeps me s…satisfied.”

Silence descended over the room, the only sound the soft crackle of the fire in the hearth. Sky felt the tension in the air grow heavier with each passing second.

"You…you didn’t just say that,” Claire said coldly. "You take that back, Sky.

Sky raised her chin defiantly. "No.” she said simply. “I'm…I’m not taking back the truth," she said, her voice ringing with unexpected steel.

"You do not speak to me like that," Claire hissed. "You have no right—"

Something inside Sky snapped. Years of frustration, years of feeling invisible and ignored, years of enduring Claire's taunts and jibes all bubbled to the surface.

"I…I have ev…every right," she shot back, her heart pounding in her chest. “Not so fun when you are on the re…receiving end, is it?”

“Either you end your…dalliance with…that creature, or you are no daughter of mine,” her father snapped.

He talked to her like she was nothing. Like she was worth less than dirt beneath his boots. 

And somehow that made it even easier. 

“You want me to turn away my mate…for what? This?” She asked him, cocking her head to the side. .

"For the sake of our family’s reputation," her father said. "You are an embarrassment to us all by associating with that…lesser fae barbarian.”

Barbarian. Lesser Fae. Thing. Creature. Monster.

All of that said about the male she loved. About her mate. 

“He’s Illyrian,” Sky said, her voice icy. 

“Oh come off it,” “Orin snapped. “He’s lesser fae. The only thing they are good for is being fodder for the armies during war times. Other than that, they are worthless.”

Fodder. 

“We have Lesser Fae ancestry ourself,” Sky responded icily. “Our great grandmother was a River Nymph.”

"That was a long time ago," her father interrupted sharply. "It was one ancestor generations ago. And besides, her blood was not that strong to begin with."

Sky thought back to the eyes that looked back from her mirror each day. Blue and beautiful. The one trace of her that got passed down to her.

"Maybe it was her blood that made you think that opening your legs for that creature was in any way appropriate," her mother hissed. 

And suddenly it was so easy. 

“Azriel is my mate,” she hissed. “I will al…always chose him over you. You can spew what..whatever insult you want about him or his pe…peoople. He’s still a bet…better male than any of you could ever hope to be, has treated me better than any of you. I’ll gladly no longer be your daughter.”

She felt the sting of tears running down her cheeks, but she didn't try to wipe them away. She just stared back at her family, daring them to say more. There was a short moment of silence, the tension thick enough to cut with a knife.

She should have expected it. Her mother had always been quick to slap her if she did anything anything that she didn’t like.

Just this time…her hand didn’t make contact.

Sky stared at the tendril of shadows that jerked her mother’s hand back, having suddenly appeared. 

*You. Will. Not. Lay. A. Finger. On. Her,* the shadows hissed menacingly.

Sky stared at the shadows, her eyes widening in shock. They were angry. No. Furious. Utterly and completely furious. Her mother seemed equally taken aback, her hand still outstretched in the air where the shadows had stopped her.

Orin looked like he was about to piss himself, and her father…her father stared at the shadows, his face ashen.

“Come here,” Sky said quietly.

The shadows left her mother to come swarming to her, brushing over her cheek in greeting before wrapping themselves around her neck in a clearly possessive move.

Sky felt the familiar warmth of the shadows sink into her, a small bit of comfort in this awful situation. She turned to her family, her jaw set.

"I’m…I’m never coming back," she said, her voice quiet but resolute. And with that, she turned and walked away, She had only taken a handful of steps when she stopped and turned back, one last thing needing to be said, before she closed the door on this chapter of her life forever.

"I never want to see any of you again," she said, her voice shaking only slightly. "And when we have children, don’t you dare come and ask to have anything to do with them. You don’t deserve to even breath the same air as my mate."

With that, she turned and walked away, her head held high. 

***

Whatever went on between sky and her family…it wasn’t good. He could feel that in the bond slumbering underneath his breast bone.

He rubbed it absentmindly, staring in the flickering flame of the Birchin.

He had won that Snowball fight. Once more. One more victory to add to it.  Not that he particularly cared right now.

*Is she alright?* he asked the shadows.

The shadows were…quiet. And that spoke volumes. Something wasn't right. Azriel's heart pounded against his chest, his instincts urging him to act. He had to make sure Sky was alright. He couldn't stand to think about her being in any sort of trouble.

*Physicallly unharmed,* the shadows promised. *Her family is horrible,* they told him distastefully. 

Azriel's heart clenched at the shadow’s words. While it was a small relief that Sky wasn't physically hurt…her family being horrible made him want to grimace. 

“Alright, I had it!” Cassian snapped at that moment. “What the fuck is going on with you two?”

Azriel turned to his brother, seeing Cassian watch Rhys and himself with an expression of…something. Exasperation maybe.

"What do you mean?" Azriel asked, his voice even, feigning ignorance. He was really not in the mood to get into that either. But apparently he wasn’t going to get that small bit of mercy. 

"Don’t play dumb with me, brother," Cassian said, rolling his eyes. "You are both moody and more distant than usual. What the heck happened?"

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” Azriel said flatly. Cassian rolled his eyes.

“Rhys?” Cassian demanded with a sigh. 

“You want to explain or shall I?” Rhys addressed him and Azriel just looked at him flatly.

“You gave the orders, High Lord.”

If Azriel had been in a better mood, he would have smirked. But right now, he just wanted this whole conversation to be over so he could check on Sky. The thought of her made his chest ache. He longed to see her, to hold her, to make sure she's alright. But he knew that Cassian and Rhys wouldn’t let him go without an explanation.

“Azriel and I…had a disagreement about Elain.” Azriel just stared at Rhys blankly. Seriously, that was the best Rhys could come up with? That’s what he wanted to go with?!

"A disagreement?" Cassian asked, brows raised. "What kind of disagreement? A 'we came to an agreement' kind of disagreement, or a 'we punched each other in the face' disagreement?"

“A ‘Rhys sticks his nose into things that are none of his business’ disagreement,” Azriel gave back drily.

“Excuse me, you were going to kiss ELain while her mate was under the same roof two years ago. Did you ever even consider the political ramifications of that?” Rhys snapped. “For gods sake, Azriel!”

Azriel's jaw clenched at Rhys's words, his temper flaring even as he tried to maintain a neutral expression. "You think I didn't consider the consequences? Of course, I did," he hissed, his voice dangerously low. "But feelings aren't logical, Rhys. We don't choose who we fall for, and it's not as simple as calculating political ramifications."

“I told Azriel to keep away from Elain. She fell for Lucien. He’s still moping about it and giving me the fault,” Rhys said flatly. “Out of pure interest, how much longer do you want to keep up with that, Az?”

Azriel couldn’t help the laugh that burst out od his mouth at that.

“You didn’t just fucking tell me to keep away from her. You told me and I quote ‘If you need to fuck somebody go to a pleasure hall and pay for it’,” Azriel repeated viciously.

"And I stand by that," Rhys snapped. "The last thing we need is for you to pine over someone who has made it clear where she stands. Elain has her mate, and she doesn't return your feelings. She’s married for gods’ sake!”

“Whoa!” Cassian cut them off. “What the fuck, Rhys?!”

"What?" Rhys demanded, glaring at Cassian.

Cassian gave him an incredulous look. "You told Azriel to go to a pleasure hall? Seriously?"

"I was trying to be helpful," Rhys said, his jaw clenching.

"Helpful?" Cassian asked incrediously. "Helpful would have been to be a little more understanding towards your brother's feelings. He does have them, you know,” Cassian said sarcastically. 

"I know that," Rhys snapped. "But he needs to move on. It's not healthy to keep pining after someone who doesn't return his feelings."

“Where was this opinion for the 500 years of me pining after Mor?” Azriel snapped. 

Rhys's expression darkened. "Don't do that, Azriel. Don't bring Mor into this. She's not relevant to this discussion."

”Not relevant?” Azriel gave back with a laugh. “I think she’s very relevant. You don’t trust me to act like an adult about my feelings. You ordered me to behave like I am some kind of rabid dog. More than once, more than twice. Constantly. Like I would ever do anything to put Mor and Emerie’s relationship into jeopardy. Don’t worry, High Lord. I’ll behave. I’ll leave Mor and Elain alone. .”

Rhys ran a hand through his hair, his frustration clear. "This is not about Mor, Azriel. This is about keeping the peace within our Inner Circle. Elain has her own life and her own happiness to think about. Interfering could only bring pain, not just for you, but for everyone involved. That’s why I ordered you to keep your distance. Not because I don’t trust your feelings or your actions, but because sometimes even the best intentions can have unintended consequences."

Azriel’s eyes darkened, his anger simmering just beneath the surface. "Don't give me any of your high and mighty bullshit, Rhysand. You don’t think I am good enough for Mor, and you certainly don't think I am good enough for Elain. But don’t worry, I'll keep my distance, as ordered. I wouldn't want to risk upsetting your perfect little court or ruining your plans for peace. Just tell me who else is off limits, so I know who else I'm not good enough for. Maybe Gwyn? Because remember, ‘don’t you dare to pressure her’?"

Rhys sighed, his gaze softening slightly. "Azriel, it's not about who you're 'good enough' for and who you aren't. It's about respecting people's choices and boundaries. Elain has made her choice in Lucien, and I just want to protect her and the peace we've worked so hard to maintain. And no, nobody else is off limits. You're free to…'seek your entertainment' as you please."

His entertainment. 

Right. 

Azriel snorted, the sound full of derision. “It warms my heart that you give me that permission,” Azriel said, his voice dripping with disdain.

Rhys rolled his eyes, clearly irritated by Azriel's reaction. "I'm not trying to 'give you permission,' Azriel," he said firmly. "I'm just trying to make sure you understand why I'm asking you to behave. I care about you and our inner circle. You're my brother, but I also care about Elain and her happiness. I don't want to see anyone get hurt."

“Have I done anything, anything at all that put her happiness in jeopardy?” Azriel asked, his voices harsh. “I kept away as you ordered. I fucking saved Lucien’s life, so she could be happy.”

"You haven't done anything wrong," Rhys acknowledged, his tone softening. "You've been a better friend to Elain than anyone could have asked. You saved Luicen because you are a good person, not just for Elain's sake. But I still think it’s best if you keep your distance. Not just for her, but for yourself too. Dwelling on feelings that can’t be returned will only bring you pain."

“For cauldron’s sake, Rhys,” Cassian said with a sigh.

Rhys turned his attention to him, the exasperation clear in his eyes. "What, Cassian?" he asked, his tone weary.

Cassian rubbed a hand over his jaw, shaking his head. "You’re so hell bent on keeping the peace you forget that the people in your court have feelings too," he said. "Azriel isn’t some emotionless soldier doing your bidding. He has feelings and desires, just like everyone else. And sometimes it’s not as simple as just moving on."

"I know that," Rhys said, running a hand through his hair. "But sometimes we have to put our own feelings aside for the greater good. As a High Lord, I have to think about the impact my actions could have on others. I'm not trying to shut down Azriel's feelings. I'm just trying to protect him from potential pain.”

“Yeah you did a shitty job at that,” Cassian said drily. “You could have told Mor hundred of years ago to have a conversation with him. You didn’t. But Azriel is supposed to tread carefully not to make her or Emerie uncomfortable. Azriel is supposed to behave?”

Rhys's eyes flashed in anger. "I know I've made mistakes, Cassian. I should have handled things differently with Mor and Azriel. But I can't change the past. All I can do is try to make the best decisions for everyone involved right now."

“You don’t even fucking realise how much of a self important hypocritical asshole you are, do you?” Azriel asked flatly. “It’s okay for you to pursue an engaged female that’s engaged to another High Lord, damn the consequences. But the rest of us…we are told to behave.”

Rhys bristled at Azriel’s words, his own temper threatening to flare. "That's different, Azriel," he said, his voice sharp. "That’s different and you know it. You would understand if you had a…” he hesitated.

"If I had a what?" Azriel prompted sharply.

Rhys let out a frustrated sigh, his fingers clenching around his mug. "A mate."

“Rhys,” Cassian said carefully.

"What?" Rhys snapped, his temper still simmering just below the surface. “He doesn’t have a mate, he doesn’t fucking understand it.”

Aaaaaand…. Azriel was done.

So fucking done. 

“Where are you going?” Rhys demanded as he stood up.

“Home,” Azriel said flatly. “You have my gifts, hand them out. Wish Feyre a Happy Birthday, will you? I’ll be back to do your bidding in about 3 days, High Lord.” 

“I highly doubt that your mother will enjoy your impromptu appearance at Rosehall,” Rhys said. Azriel’s hand twitched towards Truthteller. “Let’s just…”

“Rhysand!” Cassian snapped.

“What?” Rhys asked. 

“I have talked to my mother once since the Sealing of Velaris was lifted,” Azriel said tightly. “One conversation where she told me that she found a new family and that I should keep away from her. So no, Rhys. I am not going to Rosehall.”

Rhys looked utterly shell-shocked by Azriel’s revelation. "Azriel, I..." he started, but Azriel simply shook his head.

"Don't," he said. "Just don't." He didn’t wnat to talk about it. He never wanted to talk about that. His mother could do whatever she wanted. he would leave her alone, just as requested. But he was not going to talk about it. 

“Then I am coming with you. You are not spending Winter Solstice alone brooding at the House of Wind,” Cassian said quickly, standing. 

“I am not going to the House of Wind either.” Azriel answered flatly. “I am going home to my house and I won’t be alone either.”

"What do you mean you won't be alone?" Rhys asked sharply.

Azriel just snorted, “My mate will be there,” he said simply. “She’s better company than any of you.”

“Your...your mate?” Rhys repeated, his eyes widening.

Cassian gaped at Azriel. "Your mate? Why didn’t you tell us? Who is she?"

“Why should I tell you? ” Azriel gave back his voice icy. “I may trust you with this court, Rhysand, but I do not trust you with anything I love. Not anymore.”

[daycourtofficial]

Gingerfucker - Eris x Rhys’s Sister!reader Masterlist

Banner by @milswrites | Note: these are in chronological order by content, not by posting date. This is an ongoing series and will be updated.

Summary: no one is more surprised than Eris Vanserra to find that he is capable of much more than just political ambition

Some art of the babies: (Nyx and Atlas) (All the gingersnaps) (Atlas and Leif) (Atlas) (the family)

Art by @dawneternal: Eris during the events of Cold was the steel of my axe to grind, portraits of the gingersnaps, art of Eris and Atlas

Gingerfucker week 2024 blurbs

Moodboard

It’s just to satiate the bond - an agreement to have sex just to satiate a mating bond neither party wants is a great idea. Surely no one will get hurt, right?

One single thread of gold tied me to you* - Eris accepts the mating bond and is incredibly touched by the effort you put into cooking him the meal from scratch

All’s well that ends well to end up with you - fears and doubts cause you and Eris to do your first irrational act together: a secret mating bond ceremony

I am ash from your fire - Surprising Eris one evening, you’ve turned up in the dead of night to let him know that your brother had figured out your secret relationship, offering you an ultimatum.

Cold was the steel of my axe to grind - centuries of plotting and scheming come to a head when his mate unexpectedly arrives in Autumn and Eris is desperate to set his plans in motion, least she become a piece for Beron to use against him

Chains around my demons, wool to brave the seasons - Eris leaves his mate alone in the Forest House, telling her to trust no one but his mother. The two women are ill-equipped to provide frontline fighting, but surely they can help Eris in their own way. *companion piece to ‘Cold was the steel of my axe to grind’

Hell was the journey but it brought me Heaven - in the immediate aftermath of Beron’s death and the thrum of power in his veins, Eris’s mate forces him to, at the bare minimum, bathe

Secret exchanges - a few weeks after the aftermath of Rhys’s banishment, your mate, the new High Lord of the Autumn Court, has a secret meeting with someone from your family.

Blood moon in Autumn - fae cycles are no joke, but your mate is always there to provide you comfort in the best way possible: by being your personal heating pad

Have I found you, flightless bird? - a reflection of a life of secrets and expectations and how, despite it all, a flightless bird found home in an unlikely place

Ferocious beasts with soft bellies - Eris’s hounds know you’re pregnant before either of you do, driving the two of you wild with their newfound devotion to you.

Starfall in Autumn - based on the prompt for Starfall week “characters a and b realize they won’t make it to Starfall. They make the most of what they have to celebrate”

Laborious anxieties - Eris is riddled with anxiety leading up to your labor, but what happens when some of his worst fears come to fruition?

Cursing my name, wishing I stayed - your relationship with Rhysand had been icy at best, but your attempts to reconcile are quick to be shot down. A rash decision leads you to endangering your life - can Eris find you in time? Can he save your infant son?

Amber eyes, looking into mine - Eris finds something in his study that triggers him into a frozen state of panic. Who better suited to pulling Eris from his past than his future?

We started alone, in the end we’re okay - on a rare night alone, Eris reflects on his long life and the lonely nights that haunted his youth. And how he’s a long way from the person he was and the person he had to be.

Fireling - every father’s dream is to be there the day his son first uses his powers. Luckily for Eris, he gets just that.

How the kingdom lights shine just for me and you - Eris tells his sons a story, letting them know how a strong knight defeated an evil dragon and saved the kingdom.

Loving parents, harmless fun - Modern!Gingerfucker - slice of life where Eris takes his family on a roadtrip and is only slightly annoyed at his son’s choice of car game

* = smut

[thelov3lybookworm]

Ice Cream (part 3)

Part 1 Part 2

Summary: the shadow needs to be put on timeout.

•○●⛦●○•

Word Count: 1821

Warnings: literally just fluff. azzie being a shy baby again🥹ALSO SHADOWS BEING MENACES BWAHAHAHAA💀 az is like an old asian parent tired of his kids bs 😭

A/n: ooof i love the shadows omg there such a pain in az's lil ass lmaoo. the one smartass shadow in the first part comes back to steal the spotlight and to make az's life miserable by its jabs lol🥹

ALSO THIS IS THE LAST PART IN THIS SERIES IM SO HAPPY OML I LOVED WRITING THIS 🥹😭

anyways, enjoyyy🥹🤭

(ps. the idea for shadows writing yn's name on az was given by @ayme301 hehe so thank youuuu 🥹❣��)

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Azriel had a routine. He always did.

Wake up, train, have something to eat, send reports to Rhys, analyse more reports, go onto missions if he had any, and train some more. It was always the same variation of the same few things.

But for a month now, his routine had a new addition. Having her on his mind every moment of every day.

His mind kept wandering to the colour of her eyes, the texture of her hair, the slight tilt to her lips when she found something he did funny. The way her quick wit and subtle hints of her boldness showed through her cold exterior as she slowly began to let her guard down around him, the way her eyes began to light up ever so lightly when she saw him as the two spent more and more time together.

She had become an important part of his routine, and he did not have a single problem with it, even as it put strain on him to finish up his work sooner so no one would suspect he was getting distracted from his duty.

Having her on his mind constantly, it was hard to focus on what his family was doing as they all sat in a booth at Rita’s, because he was too busy wondering what Y/n might be doing tonight. Maybe she was at her home, reading and sipping tea. Maybe she was out with her friends. Maybe she was by herself, wandering through the countless shops displaying items irresistible to anyone.

Maybe she was thinking of him.

The last thought had sudden heat travelling to Azriel’s cheeks, and he willed his shadows to cover him in case his family took notice of it as he lifted his almost empty cup of the alcoholic beverage Cassian had shoved into his hands to his lips.

Azriel looked up, glancing out of the window near the booth his family occupied, hoping that if Y/n really was out, she would walk by. It would certainly be a treat to his eyes and a soothing distraction from the overstimulation that was the inner circle.

"Az?"

He blinked, glancing over to Feyre, who stared at Az with furrowed brows. "Yes?"

She stared at him for a moment, a moment in which Azriel quickly looked over everyone present over the table. All their eyes were fixed on him, some confused, some curious. "We asked if you’re in for the game?"

Az straightened, setting his glass on the table and wrapped his arms around his chest. "Sure."

Cassian lifted a brow. "Do you even know what we’re playing?" Azriel’s cheeks flushed at the knowing look in his brother’s eyes, and he glanced down at his lap, clearing his throat and waiting for a shadow to fill him in on what was going on.

Master needs to learn to pay attention.

Azriel turned his head slightly to scowl at the particular shadow, and it bobbed away happily, as if unaware of his glare. But thankfully, another shadow floated up to his ear to whisper.

Truth or drink. They wish to probe and do your work.

The shadow that had initially hurried away from Azriel slithered back up his neck.

Be nosy, that is.

Azriel would have glared had he not had to turn back to his family. He nodded slightly, clearing his throat. "Truth or drink. I’m in."

Cassian leaned back, shooting a look that irked Azriel to Rhysand, who leaned forward on the table with a shit eating grin. "Let’s start with you then, brother. Who is keeping you so distracted and bothered all the time?"

Azriel clenched his jaw, releasing a breath through his nose, contemplating whether it was worth telling his family and bringing himself to his doom at their gossiping hands.

Before he could settle on his choice to drink, his shadows had already made the decision.

"Y…" Mor squinted, her brows furrowed, and Azriel’s blood ran cold when he heard the first few syllables of her name. "Y/n?"

Azriel stared at Mor, who smirked, her eyes fixed on Azriel’s forehead as she leaned back. Azriel looked around at all his friends, wondering what the hell was going on and how they knew Y/n’s name. And then a shadow moved closer to his ear.

Y/n.

Y/n Y/n Y/n.

Azriel reeled in his frustration at the less than helpful chanting, but then the same shadow hit his chin, prompting him to lift it, and his eyes landed on her.

She wore a simple black dress, the thing covering everything and leaving everything up to imagination with the high neck and long sleeves and skirts. Her hair was open, and she looked just as beautiful as she always did.

And she was looking right at him, her lips spread in a smile as she stood right behind Cassian, seemingly having stood up from the booth next to them.

In the back of his mind, Azriel knew his family was looking at him in concern when he said nothing, but he couldn’t care less as he stared at that smile, the one he had seen for the first time ever.

She is beautiful.

She never smiled more than the slight tilts to her lips, and maybe it was for the good, because if he had seen that smile earlier, he might already be married right now. She was so mesmerising, it was a miracle Azriel hadn’t asked her to be his on the first ever outing to the ice cream shop the two had been to. But if he had seen her offer him that smile, he would have gone too far in love, he knew.

Master needs to stop drooling, he looks like a baby.

And ugly.

Azriel almost turned to scowl, but he did not want to miss even a moment of the smile on her face. But that also led him to the question. Why was she smiling?

She giggled lightly, and he only knew because he saw her throat muscles move as she lifted a finger to her forehead, then pointed at him.

And then Azriel realised.

He quickly lifted his hand to his head, whipping away the shadow that would not stop acting like a smartass teenager. After he was sure the shadow was gone and no longer using his forehead as some sort of writing surface to announce to the world his feelings for a certain bookstore owner, he swallowed and stood, trying to excuse himself.

But Cassian turned, looking right at Y/n. "Are you Y/n?"

The eyes Azriel always found himself lost in lifted to meet his own hazel ones, her cheeks turning a deeper shade as she tried to stop smiling. Azriel could see the blush on her face, even in the dim lighting, and he thanked the mother for his eyesight.

Y/n not having her guard up at all times was not a sight everyone was blessed to witness.

She nodded lightly, glancing around at the rest of Azriel’s friends before giving him a small wave. She turned and walked out after her friends, who laughed among themselves. She did shoot him a glance before she walked out, but then she was gone.

Azriel turned, trying to see if there was any way he could escape his confines, having been pushed to sit between the window and Feyre. And when he didn’t, he climbed onto the seat and stepped behind her, then Rhysand, whispering apologies as he hopped onto the ground and broke into a sprint, hoping to catch up to Y/n.

His family tried to call after him, but Azriel was a male on a mission, and a very skilled one at that.

He stepped out into the cold night air, his eyes landing on Y/n waving at her friends as they went the opposite direction. He swallowed, hoping she would not mind his presence and walked towards her. She probably felt his proximity, as when she turned, she only smiled at him and gestured for him to walk with her.

A shadow floated close to Azriel to inform him of the way his family was watching him like hawks from the window they had sat next to, and when Azriel turned to look, sure enough, Cassian and feyre scrambled away, while Rhysand, Mor and Nesta looked like they were trying too hard to act nonchalant.

"They really are nosy." Y/n’s soft voice reached Azriel, and he turned to offer her an exasperated look.

"And I deal with it everyday."

She laughed, gently slipping her hand to hold his arm. Instantly, his pulse was galloping.

Master is no better than a schoolboy.

Azriel shot a glare to the darned shadow, wondering if there was a chance he could put it in timeout.

"So… I keep you distracted, huh?" Y/n spoke after a moment, making Azriel’s ears go warm.

"I…"

She laughed, leaning her head against his shoulder as the two walked the rest of the way in silence. Azriel only heard her laugh ring in his ears, wishing and praying that he would be blessed enough by the mother to hear the beautiful sound for the rest of his life.

Only once the two were at her apartment doors did she pull away and step forward, towards the entrance before turning to him, around an arms length of distance between the two.

Too much.

"So?"

Azriel folded his hands at his back, smiling slightly. "So?"

She leaned back against the wall, humming. "When am I meeting the family then?"

His breath hitched. "You… want to?"

She lifted a brow. "You don’t?"

Azriel shook his head, looking down at his boots. "I don’t want you to be uncomfortable, and I know they can be a lot sometimes."

He heard her move closer to him, lifting his eyes to meet her gaze once both her hands had reached out to hold one of his. "I think I am ready, Az."

Az. She called me Az.

He leaned his head closer to her. "What do I get if I take you to meet them?"

She blinked at him. "Oh, I don’t know, maybe you get to tell everyone you are courting me? And you can stop having to sneak around to meet me?"

He grinned, hearing those words spoken into the space between them as he touched his forehead to hers. "Hmm… not enough. I want more."

She snorted. "And what is that?"

"Maybe you take me out to the ice cream shop again." He reached up to touch her cheek, his eyes fixated on the way her skin seemed to contrast with his.

"And this time, we will get a huge bucket of mint chocolate, and share it. Like a real couple."

She smiled again, rolling onto her tiptoes to press her lips to his cheek.

"Mint chocolate it is."

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

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[starryevermore]

and now i see daylight ✧ azriel & lucien

angst city™ library | send in a request (consult request faqs first)

pairing: azriel x fem!reader; lucien vanserra x fem!reader

summary: maybe he ran with the wolves and refused to settle down. maybe you’ve stormed out of every single room in this town—threw out the cloaks and the daggers because it’s morning now. it’s brighter now. 

word count: 3,241

warnings?: angst city™, mates, rejected bond, finding love again, fluff, multi pov, not proofread

When you were younger, you always thought that finding your mate would be the happiest day of your life. Your parents were the happiest people you had ever seen, and you thought your mate would make you feel that same level of joy. Why wouldn’t he? You didn’t know of the hardships of having a mate that wasn’t well-matched to you. Of a mate who did not adore you the way you adored him. Once, you thought Azriel thought the same way you did. That finding his mate would be a sort of heavenly high. Once, you dreamed that you and Azriel would be mates—because who would be better together than two lovesick fools? 

And yet, as you felt that golden bond tug deep in the center of your chest, all you felt was the overwhelming sense of dread. Because you had just seen your mate kiss another female. A female that was mated to someone else. You watched as Rhysand pulled him away, no doubt to talk to Azriel about the colossal mistake he was making. You caught Elain’s eye as she turned to leave. She said your name softly. 

“Follow your heart,” you said as your own was breaking. “Don’t let anyone tell you what you feel is wrong. You are the only one who knows what is right for you.”

Elain stared at you as if she could see right through you. Maybe she could. She was a Seer—who knew the limits of her power. Her voice was as gentle as a hug, “You should, too.”

It would have been kinder, would have hurt less, if she had strangled you. Fought you for Azriel’s affections, even if she would always win in the end. “Be well, Elain.”

“Be well.”

After you left that night, you didn’t see your friends for a long while. It was better that way, you supposed. You only became friends with the Inner Circle after befriending Azriel. He had come into the café you once worked at for some peace and quiet. It had been late, so you and him were the only ones there. Though he sought solitude, you ended up chatting his ear off. He didn’t seem to mind. Azriel came every night for months, save for the days he was gone away on missions. Eventually, his brothers got curious about what Azriel was doing with his nights and followed him. And, well, the rest was history. 

Nowadays, you were a researcher for Rhys. Ever since Feyre became fae, ever since Elain and Nesta were made, ever since Nesta was showing how deep her powers ran, that meant you spent most of your time holed up in a library, nose shoved in a book. No one ever questioned why you were gone. It made it all so simple to slip away. 

If only you noticed the inky tendrils of Azriel’s shadows lurking in the corners of your apartment. Maybe then you wouldn’t have been surprised by the Shadowsinger’s sudden arrival. 

“You’re leaving without a goodbye?”

You jumped at the sound of the deep voice echoing in your near-empty bedroom. When you turned, his hazel eyes were narrowed suspiciously at you. “I thought it would be easier that way.”

Azriel lifted his chin, glared down his nose at you. You noted the way his fingers twitched into fists, as though he was barely constraining his anger. His hurt. “How could you ever think that?”

“Because I cannot watch my mate love another female.”

He didn’t react. Not for a long time. Long enough for you to carefully place your clothes in your suitcase, to go to your wardrobe for another load and fold them up. Before you could place them, too, in the suitcase, his hand caught your wrist. His eyes looked pained when you looked up at him. 

“I wish you told me,” he said. “How long have you known?”

Not, I would rather be with my mate. Not, to hell with Elain. Not, I want to try. 

“Since you kissed Elain at Solstice. So, a few weeks.”

Azriel gave a tight nod, looked anywhere but at you. His grip on your wrist loosened enough for you to resume packing. He didn’t stop you again.

“That…was probably for the best.”

And somehow, that hurt more than seeing him kiss Elain in the first place. Azriel wasn’t going to fight for you. For how many years had he longed to meet his mate? How many stories had he told you of how he would spoil his mate rotten, never let her know a day where he didn’t love her? Was there something wrong with you? Azriel didn’t want you as a mate. Certainly that meant something was wrong with you. 

You shook off a shadow that was trying to wind itself up in your hair. 

“Where are you going to go?”

“I think it’s for the best you don’t know.” Maybe it was petty, maybe it was justified. You hoped it hurt Azriel regardless. 

He nodded again. “Right. Plausible deniability when everyone else is wondering where you’ve gone. That’s smart.”

You weren’t sure they’d notice, but you nodded anyways. You crossed the room to your chest of drawers and got your underwear. Once, you might have blushed at the idea of your mate seeing your lacy unmentionables. Now, you kind of wanted to throw them in Azriel’s face and taunt him over what he was losing. 

“You…didn’t want this either, did you?” he asked. If you shut your eyes and pretended hard enough, you might have heard hurt in his voice. Pleading. Hope that maybe you would tell him otherwise. But when you looked at him, you only saw the same cold apathy he came into the room with.

You sucked your tongue over your teeth. “Why do you think I didn’t say anything?” you lied. “I didn’t want to burden you with this decision.” 

Another shadow tried to wrap itself around you. Despite your best efforts to shake it off, this one was more stubborn. Why wasn’t Azriel keeping a tighter reign on them? You paused. Why were they even here in the first place? The shadows had to have been the reason he came. But why?

“Why are you here, Az?”

Azriel’s jaw clenched and unclenched. Fight for me, you begged. You tugged on the bond, hoping that he might feel something. If he did, he gave no indication. “My shadows made me believe you were in trouble.”

“Well, I’m not. So, you can feel free to leave.”

His mouth opened, then shut. He nodded. “Be well,” he said. 

You didn’t say it back. 

Lucien watched as you basked in the glow of the Day Court’s sun. When he had last seen you in the Night Court, you had often slunk in the shadows with the Court’s Spymaster. You almost seemed like a different female. As though you were finally shining. He found himself hoping you always shined.

The two of you had grown close. Lucien had never expected the two of you to become anything remotely resembling friends. You were kind to him in the Night Court, of course. But you once had been glued to Azriel’s side. Hiding in the shadows, never allowing anyone too close. Now, it was by Lucien’s side that you stayed. It was him who you smiled at, who you told your jokes to, who you would drag to the library so you would have company while you worked. Lucien Vanserra had become your closest confidant, and he wore that title with pride. He would not forsake you as Azriel had done. 

Months ago, when Lucien arrived here, he had been surprised to see you hiding in the palace. It had been his understanding that you so rarely strayed from the Spymaster’s side. At first, Lucien thought you had been sent to Day for research. With its ten thousand libraries, there was little you couldn’t find. Yet, the longer he stayed to reconnect with his apparent father, the stranger it was that you remained.

“This is her home now,” Helion explained when Lucien asked at dinner one evening. One of the frequent evenings where you were buried away in the library and had forgotten to come eat.

“Night is her home.” It had been for as long as he knew you. 

Helion raised a brow. “Not any longer.”

Lucien’s heart clenched. Had something terrible happened? Did you have a falling out with Rhysand’s Inner Circle? He asked Helion as much.

“Her mate sought the love of another,” he said gently. Helion looked over at your empty chair across from Lucien. “Perhaps you should bring her down a tray. Your lonely hearts might enjoy each other’s company.”

Lucien wanted to laugh in his father’s face. You had never so much as looked at Lucien as anything more than an acquaintance. You were kinder than the rest of the Inner Circle, of course. You knew he had been Feyre’s friend, and you felt like he should be treated nicer than the rest of the Night Court did. No one ever followed your suit. He was Spring Court’s scourge. For all they knew, he would run to Tamlin at the first opportunity. You never made him feel like you distrusted him. In another life, maybe he would have fallen for you then. But Lucien remembered how you always gazed longingly at Azriel. How the last time he saw you, you looked like a shell of yourself as he and Elain inched closer and closer together during Solstice. If Azriel had been your mate, the mate who won Lucien’s own mate’s heart, then perhaps Helion was right. 

That evening, as Lucien sat in the library with you, watching you eat and laugh at the stories he had gathered from his time with Vassa and Jurian, he vowed to never let you become that shell again. 

Which was why he dreaded telling you that Rhysand had asked for permission to use Day’s libraries and the Inner Circle would be joining him. 

So he didn’t. 

“Come to Winter with me,” Lucien said as he stood above you, extending a hand for you to take. 

You smiled as you slipped your hand into his. As you rose to your feet, Lucien helped to steady you, a sturdy arm wrapping around your waist. He liked the way your soft body felt pressed against his chest. He liked how you made no effort to pull away from him even more. “Why are we going to Winter?”

“Does there have to be a reason?” Lucien asked. “Jurian told me of how humans would build men out of the snow.”

Your eyes twinkled as you looked up at him. For a second, he was sure you would buy it. Not question a thing. But then your smile faltered. “They’re coming here, aren’t they?”

“I want to build a snowman with you. A whole snowfamily, if you’ll let me.”

“Since I left, Rhysand has been down a researcher. He and Helion are still allies, so he asked if he could come here to talk with the librarians. He’s bringing everyone with him, isn’t he?”

Lucien lifted your hand to his mouth, brushed his lips over your knuckles. “Come to Winter with me,” he repeated. 

“Is Elain coming, too?”

“I don’t care if she is.” Oddly enough, he meant it. When Lucien came to the Night Court, he tried to be there for Elain. At every turn, she pushed him away. He didn’t blame her, of course. This transition was not easy on its own, never mind adding a mating bond to the mix. Eventually,  the desire to be around her dulled. Lucien didn’t want a mate who didn’t want him, so he put distance between them. He was grateful he did. Otherwise Lucien would never get to feel you in his arms. “I’ve moved on, but I know the ache is still fresh for you. Come to Winter with me, and let us pretend the Cauldron made us mates instead.”

The corner of your mouth quirked up again. You pulled his hand toward your mouth, kissed his knuckles. Lucien’s heart fluttered in his chest. “When do we leave?”

The wails of his shadows had not ceased since you left the Night Court. Though Elain had bought him refill after refill of that headache powder in an attempt to relieve the pounding in his head at their constant somber songs, it had done little to alleviate his pain. Not the ache in his head, nor the ache in his heart. Azriel once thought he was grateful that you had decided to reject the bond. As wonderful as you were a friend, he had been so sure his heart laid with Elain. That there was something more powerful, more beautiful, about choosing to love another when fate demanded otherwise. Now, he only wondered if he should have chosen you. 

Only Feyre was the one able to figure out why Azriel had become more withdrawn than usual. Everyone chalked up your disappearance as to why he faded more into the shadows, believed that the loss of his twin flame so suddenly had left him reeling, but they didn’t understand why. But Feyre, Feyre understood. She had found him standing outside your old apartment building too long, had found him staring at the door to your room in the River House too often, had found him turning to whisper something to you only to remember you were gone too much. When he heard whispers throughout his many missions about how you lived with Helion, there were many nights where Feyre watched as Azriel stood on the edge of the balcony, ready to fly off and bring you home. Perhaps that was why she encouraged him to join her and the rest of the Inner Circle at the Day Court. She thought she was being helpful. Maybe if you saw him again, she thought, you would decide to be with your mate. 

You wouldn’t, and Azriel knew that. He had once told you he would forsake his mating bond, should it ever come, to remain with Elain. He shouldn’t be hurt that you believed him. 

And, yet, his shadows sang as they arrived in Helion’s home. Helion’s home, where you were not at. 

At first, Azriel thought you might have been hiding away. Helion would not be so cruel as to not give you a warning that your former family would be coming for a visit. But as the week wore on, Azriel realized the brief hints of your scent he caught were stale. Like you had been gone. Like you had left. 

He didn’t blame you. 

On the final night of their visit, Feyre finally broached the subject of your whereabouts at the end of a meeting. 

“She and Lucien have gone to Winter for the week,” Helion said as he led everyone out of the meeting room and into the hall. “They should be arriving soon.”

Azriel was suddenly aware of how Elain hung onto his arm, her grip tightening at the mention of her rejected mate. A good partner would have comforted her, would have reassured her that he would stand between them should Lucien dare to try anything. Azriel wasn’t a good partner, for all he could think of was why the Hel were you with Lucien?

“I hope we can catch them before we leave,” Feyre said, sparing a glance at Azriel. 

The air shifted. Down the hall, you appeared with Lucien. Azriel’s breath caught in his throat. He watched as you leaned against Lucien’s arm, beaming up at him. Had Azriel ever seen you smile like that before? What had Lucien done to deserve such a look from you? He wasn’t aware the two of you were even close. Sure, you had been friendly to him, but you were friendly with most people. Azriel struggled to wrap his mind around how so much could change in a few short months. A blip in the life of a fae, and yet he almost felt like he was staring at a stranger. 

Beside him, Helion smiled fondly at his son. “Ah, I am glad he finally made a move.”

Azriel glanced at Day’s High Lord then back to you. 

Rhys, however, took the bait. “Oh? I would have thought Lucien would still be heartbroken over Elain rejecting the bond.”

Helion’s face hardened for a moment, before he smiled at the way Lucien softly kissed the side of your head. Azriel wanted his shadows to strangle the male and he might have allowed them to, if it wasn’t for the glare Feyre was sending him. “They both were heartbroken, then they found each other.”

“I wish they would get lost,” Azriel muttered to himself.

Helion looked at him, brows pinched together. He looked as though he could see right through Azriel. Did he know? Did he know that you were Azriel’s mate? It wouldn’t have surprised him if Helion did know. You had to have provided some reason for why you fled your home. “Pardon?”

Feyre jumped in before Azriel could do something to lose one of Night’s few allies. “I believe Azriel was saying something about being hungry. Will dinner be soon?”

Helion’s face softened at Feyre. “You will have to try harder to distract me, High Lady. But your Shadowsinger may join us all for dinner in a few minutes if you can keep your leash on him.”

From the corner of his eye, he watched as Elain looked up at him. He did not meet her gaze. He couldn’t stop staring at you.

“He’ll behave. Won’t you, Azriel?” Feyre said. 

Still, he stared. You and Lucien came closer, but neither of you seemed to notice. Was this his punishment? To watch you so wrapped up in the love of another, just as you had done to him? He would take it all back. He would beg to the Mother for a chance to do it all over again, to finally see you. 

“Won’t you, Azriel?” Feyre repeated, a little firmer this time. 

You froze, eyes going wide as you finally, finally, saw him. Lucien tensed, taking a slight step in front of you, as though to shield you from Azriel. What harm would he cause you? You were his mate. He was supposed to protect you. 

“Are you well?” Azriel managed to ask. His voice was tight, as if his vocal cords might snap if he said anymore. Around him, his shadows began to dance. He fought hard to keep them at his side, though a few still slipped out to swirl around your feet.  

Your eyes slid up to Lucien. A soft smile curled across your face. What had happened in Winter between you and him? What had been happening while you resided in Day? You took Lucien’s hand. “I once believed love would be black and white,” you said, “but…it’s golden, like daylight.”

Azriel’s chest seized. He shook off Elain and stumble backwards. Cassian sent him an odd look, and he felt Rhys’s talons scrape down his shield.

“You’re well?” he repeated. He had to be sure. Had to know there was not a chance in Hel that he could win your favor again somehow. 

“Yes.”

“You deserve it,” he said.��

You looked at him again, your eyes softening. “So do you.”

Azriel was gone before he heard you. 

[readychilledwine]

Pieces of You pt 4

Summary - After losing Feyre to childbirth, Rhysand finds himself leaning on one of her friends much more than he'd ever expected.

Warnings- Mourning, loss of a partner, loss of a friend, loss of parent, babies and the complications that come with raising them, slight neglect, slight angst to wrap it up before Fluff and smut begin, same editing warning (friend is arc reading, Liz will catch any other mistakes when she rereads this with fresh eyes)

A/n - I promised they wouldn't be a part long. What you're all waiting for will happen in the next part. 🫣

✨️ Series Masterlist ✨️ Rhysand Masterlist ✨️ Master Masterlist ✨️

This nanny was not you.

You had the left house, as promised, Monday morning. You hadn't taken a single dress Rhys had bought his Little Mor, a single one of her toys, you didn't even take the blanket he had paid for with her name stitched into soft buttery fabric.

He watched as Nyx fought the female he had hired. He would only latch to her for a few moments before wailing, piercing the now all too quiet home with his confusion and frustration. This nanny was not you, and Nyx clearly was not going to accept her.

He had hoped by the afternoon Nyx would have been hungry enough to just latch, to cave, but that was not the case. The young heir was crying again, frustrated and hungry as he slowly wore himself out into another unscheduled nap. Rhysand zoned out the noise, his mind now on you, on the second chance of love, devotion, happiness he allowed to walk out the door.

Nyx had taken to you. He was a momma’s boy the second he was about to show preference. But Morwenna, Morwenna was Rhysand's. His own breathing filled the void of silence that had fall over the house, and as he stared at his paperwork, tears began to fall, he just hoped your mind was on him, or at least Nyx, as well.

His mind went to his Little Mor, his sweet girl. Her eyes always lit up for him, shrieks of joy and excitement were common in Rhysand's office.

You sighed and sunk into the couch, Azriel beside you as you did. “Come home,” he had been begging for the past two hours for you to see reason, to forgive Rhysand. He had explained what happened at dinner, watching as you slowly fell apart all over again. “He didn't mean a single word. I can tell.”

Azriel swallowed before standing, “I will be back. Kiss my niece for me when she wakes up. I'll come back to sing her to sleep tonight.”

You shook your head, leaning back into the couch as you did. “It felt like he did, Azriel. It felt like he just-” you stopped yourself from crying, not willing to hurt over some male who so easily threw you away. “He said I needed to stop acting like Nyx's mom.” You watched Azriel's face fall. Watched as his sun-kissed tan skin paled. “Then tried to tell me I could not take Morwenna with me.”

Screaming. Screaming was all Azriel heard as he walked into the new Riverhouse. Rhys was pacing the floor, bouncing Nyx as the sun fell and Cassian stood there, eyes watering and wide in panic. He took a spot next to Cassian, sharing a look of concern with his brother. “He refuses to latch on to his nanny,” Cassian's voice cracked. “And Madja keeps trying to tell Rhysand it's just going to be an adjustment period, but Nyx is hungry.”

Azriel nodded, mind flashing back to the subtle looks of pain on your face as you so much as moved or held his Little Mor. “And he won't just suck up his pride and take him to y/n?”

Cassian sighed. “He said he can't do that after what he has done. That there is no fixing the hurt he caused.” Anger had leaked into Cassian's soft voice. “I do not get how she can do this to Nyx.”

“You would do it to if you mate ignored your bond.” The weight of those words hit Cassian's chest, screaming in his like an alarm. “What.”

“Y/n and Rhysand are mates,” Azriel went to Rhys, stroking Nyx's back. “Let me take him to her?”

Rhys shook his head, ignoring the tears falling at his son's frustration. “I just need him to adjust.”

“Starving is not adjusting, Rhysand. It is neglect.” The High Lord turned to Azriel, glaring hard. “I know what you said to her. Go there, apologize, and have her feed him at the very least. She loves him.”

As if it was a spell place to curse Rhysand, Nyx must have caught the faint scent of you lingering to Azriel's soft t shirt. The heir calmed significantly, reaching for the material. “Give me your shirt so I can lay him down and we can discuss this.”

Azriel obeyed, hoping just the scent of you would be enough to give him a small nap while Azriel convinced Rhysand to let him take Nyx to you. Just for the night.

Rhysand sighed, laying Nyx down with Azriel's shirt underneath him. He would have been lying if anyone asked him if he had savored that soft scent clinging to the shirt. He walked out of the room and hardly made it 5 steps before the wailing began again. Rhys pulled the bottle filled with the mixture Madja had made from his pocket world before going back in.

Nyx was inconsolable. He had spent the better portion of the morning crying, screaming, refusing to sleep.

Rhysand picked him up, praying to anyone who would listen and wishing on every star that Nyx would just take this bottle. As soon as he latched, Rhysand watched his flawless little face make a deeper scowl before pushing the bottle away. You were Nyx's sole thought. Your smell, your skin under his, your voice. The piercing wail had Azriel and Cassian running up the stairs as soon as they heard.

Rhysand knew Nyx didn't fully understand the noise about to come from his mouth. Nyx didn't know it expressed exactly what he wanted, nor what the sound would mean. He didn't know that it would make his father crawl back to you less than 12 hours after you had left. The heir released a strangled cry over and over again of one of the only sounds he knew to make, "Ma. Ma. Ma!”

"No," Rhysand choked down the tears that were getting ready to fall. "He's crying for y/n. He's crying for his mama.” Rhys didn't wait for them, he didn't even say goodbye, he winnowed into your living room. You were curled up on the couch, instantly awake by the sounds of Nyx's crying.

"Is he crying for Feyre?" Cassian went to take a tentative step forward, just for Rhysand to stand and move quickly out of the room.

Rhysand didn't even have to ask. He didn't have to beg. You took the heir instantly and pulled him to you, placing him in his favorite spot to eat.

His tears had triggered Morwenna, though, and soon her soft cries filled the air. Rhysand ran to her. He ran to his daughter and cradled her tight to his chest. Her bright eyes instantly looked up at him, a smile taking place of where a deep frown was. “Hi baby girl,” her giggle instantly changed his mood. He walked her to the living room, watching as she instantly because to smile and shriek at the sight of Nyx.

“Give him a little bit, baby,” you didn't even look up from the tiny illyrian, stroking his brow as he ate. “He is very hungry and mama needs him to eat.” Rhys sat across from you, holding Little Mor tight to him. “She's been making d noises all day. To me, to Azriel, to no one. Just “dah duh deh” all day.”

“She missed her daddy,” Rhys held her up, rocking her gently side to side, “didn't you Morwenna. You missed daddy? 13 hours apart is much too long, isn't it, my little darling.” You shook your head, fighting the smile as Wen giggled at Rhysand.

You felt your heart skip a best as he kissed her cheeks and then her tummy. Rhysand was a wonderful father, and watching him in this element, this area of self-doubt, he had made all feelings of anger melt away. He looked to you instantly, claws gently tapping on the fortress of your mind before you allowed him in. “Let me take us home?” Home, the word replayed in your mind before you nodded, holding a hand to him. Home sounded so good.

He winnowed you two back to the Riverhouse, making Wen giggle even more at the starlight that surrounded you four. You walked in and stopped dead in your tracks, eyes Azriel up and down. “Where are your clothes?”

Azriel looked shameless, muscled torso on display as he held Cassian in a headlock. “I'm choking out Cassian and your concern is my lack of a shirt?”

Cassian raised a hand to you, face slightly red. His eyes had a hint of guilt in them as he tapped Azriel's abs. “Y/n,” Cassian moved to guide you to the couch, smiling at a still latched Nyx and then moved Rhysand to be next you. “I want to apologize.” You knit your brows at him as he sat and Azriel glared.

“I made some unfair statements without consideration for you and Rhysand. I did not think about how my words would affect your relationship with each other, or how I cheapend the new mating bond you two share.”

Cassian looked raw. Like months of build up and emotion hit him. “We prepared you know? We knew she was going to die, we begged and prayed for a solution, and just when hope came it crashed like a tidal wave. Nesta and I won't even touch each other. The guilt-”

“You have nothing to be guilty for, Cass,” Rhys interrupted him. “I'm the one who had sex with her. I'm the one who-”

“It was an accident,” you spoke softly, pulling the focus to you. “Feyre's death was a tragic mistake and accident. You all did not know the extent of her shifting magic. You didn't know it temporarily changed her that deeply.”

Rhys seemed love drunk as he handed you Little Mor, kissing both babes before you walked away. He was silent until you left, eyes trailing your body. “Cassian, I love her.”

Rhys sobbed softly, hearing words from you many had whispered before felt so different. Like a soothing balm over a wound, slowly healing it. “Cassian, Nesta did not know that the outcome of her bargaining with a God would be a cruel trick. There's no guilt to be had. She gave everything back, made herself the Cauldron’s servant. She was too young to read those unspoken lines.” Nyx finally let go, deep asleep in your arms. “I'm going to go lay him down. There is nothing for me to forgive because you did not intentionally harm me, Cassian, but maybe you three should speak.”

“I know.”

“That doesn't mean I never loved Feyre. Nor that I've forgotten her.”

A second “I know” broke through Cassian's lips, his shoulders falling as it did. “I miss her.”

Rhys felt the tears welling, felt them falling before he could will them away. “I do too. Every fucking day I miss her. I miss her hair, her laugh, her voice. I miss her correcting me.” He watched Cassian fall more, mourning the sister he had lost openly for the first time.

“But when I'm with y/n, it hurts less. When I see y/n smile, I feel more whole again. When I hear her laugh, I feel like I'm alive again. When I see her with Nyx, when I see his smile when she's holding him or playing with them, I feel like Feyre is here, nudging me towards y/n.”

Azriel's voice came, soft and slow. “Feyre would want you to move on, Rhysand. She would have wanted you to find happiness. She would probably fight all of us for being this sad.”

The thought of that made Cassian genuinely smile. His eyes sparkling with fond memories of Feyre Cursebreaker stomping her feet when he'd beat her during a sparring match. “Her and Feyre both do this thing, maybe it's an artistic thing, where they look at things really close and back away slowly.”

Rhys started laughing immediately knowing what his brother meant. “Y/n did it with one of my outfits. She said I looked great as long as she stayed 5 feet away.”

Azriel put a hand on Cassian's shoulder. “This is a roundabout way of us telling you we support you, Rhysand. We support you and y/n.”

“Two mates,” Cassian said slowly. “Imagine having two mates, Az. Two females that you get to love unconditionally and annoy whenever you'd like.”

Rhys and Azriel shared a silent look, a soft, "Not yet” coming through to Rhysand's mind. “We will leave you and y/n alone to talk.”

“There won't be much talking,” Rhysand stood slowly. “I've always been better at expressing my emotions physically.”

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[moonfawnx]

Whispers of our past

Rhysand x Celine (oc)

Prologue

Celine stared at the wall, waiting.

Waiting for Rhys to come back to her.

Was he playing some kind of sick jokes?

It had been a week ago when she’d last seen him. When he’d made love to her all night, whispering promises on her skin, promises of their future.

She held him through the night, stroking his hair and wings softly, sharing her love to him.

He played with her black hair, and complimented her eyes, commenting ominously how they reminded him of oceans during night, due to their deep blue colour.

They had been seeing each other for nearly five years. Five years- she had met his family in the first few months and oh how she adored all of them. Her playful jokes with Cassian, her mutual calmness with Azriel allowed them to bond, her shared interests with Moriggan and her witty responses that amused Amren.

She was his peace. His happiness, his comfort. She’d bonded so well with his family, he couldn’t wait to have her sit on a throne beside him, rule with him and spend the rest of his life with her.

But for now, they chose a more peaceful life.

They were staying at a cottage he purchased, on the outsides of Velaris, as it provided a sense of freedom and calmness he hadn’t experienced anywhere else.

Three weeks ago, he had finally done it. He had taken her on a dinner date, and a flight after which landed them on the top of the tallest mountain there, granting them a perfect view of the stars and galaxy. and right there, the high lord went on one knee, and pulled out a small black box, with a shiny ring inside.

The stone, was the prettiest Celine had ever laid her eyes on, as he explained that he’d had it custom made for her, as none he had found seemed perfect enough for her.

She said yes, and then she was in his arms, tears in her eyes as she kissed him beneath the stars.

For the weeks after the proposal, he was with her every single night, tangled in the sheets together, whispering together about their love.

And then a week ago, whilst they were together again, he left and never came back.

He had been laying on her bed, sheepishly smiling at her while she rubbed body cream on her skin, right after they showered together. And as she turned towards him and smiled back, his smile faltered as his eyes widened.

He quickly got up, muttering some excuses about how he had court meetings he had forgotten about, and then vanished into air.

Celine, of course, was understandably confused but figured the high lord would return to her the day after.

But he didn’t.

Not the day after, not two days after, then three and now a week.

Her stress for him grew each day, and by the third day of hearing no word for him, she made her way to Velaris but- the city was gone.

It was as if the earth had swallowed her beautiful home, as she tried to find her way back, to home, to him.

It was then she realised- he shielded the city. From what? From who?

And where was he? Why had he left her? Why had he not contacted her yet?

It was then that she realised that the high lord disregarded her as if she meant nothing to him.

Had he shielded the city from her?

Was that why he abandoned her and never looked back?

As she sat on the couch in the cottage they once shared, a month after Rhysand’s disappearance , that she figured she had to leave.

She packed a bag with her essentials, and some clothing, and then went to her old family home, which she shared with her parents and brother- Matthias, before her parents passed, which lead to both siblings following their own paths.

She winnowed at the house, in the mountains separating winter and autumn courts, and it was after she settled there- and sent a letter to Matthias, who lived at mortal lands with his wife- a kind healer named Elena, as she felt a strong need for their support.

Her brother and his wife arrived two days later, and Celine had finally allowed herself to break down in their arms, as she explained what had happened with Rhys- still looking at her engagement ring on her finger, which she hadn’t found the strength to take off yet.

“Are you sure? Are you sure he doesn’t want you anymore” Matthias asked her, confused since he had known Rhys for all the years he’d been with his sister, and the male seemed to be truly in love with her.

“He left me Mat.” she sobbed “he left, he left, he left.”

Elena and Matthias understood that it was better that they stayed with her through that hard time- and thankfully their old house was big enough for everyone.

In the following week, though, Elena noticed weird behaviour coming from Celine. It was stuff that she excused and blamed to her broken heart- but Elena as a healer knew better than that.

Her sudden mood swings, bone aches and belly pains.

Her growing habit of throwing up every. single. morning.

Her random cravings for food combinations that others would consider repulsing.

Elena knew what all of this meant.

So one night, she approached Celine softly, while she was once again throwing up.

“Celine dear- are you aware of what this-“ she tried but was interrupted.

“please don’t say it” Celine begged, her tired expression and red cheeks evident. “please I- i can’t do this without him”

“You have us” Elena promised “You have me and your brother. I- We promise to be by your side through every step, if you decide to go forward with the pregnancy. The choice is up to you”

Celina started silently crying again, on the first ever acknowledgment of the life growing inside her.

Of the memory she and Rhys had shared.

Of the thoughts that had been haunting her ever since she understood what her morning sickness meant.

Had he known? Was that why he left her? Left them?

She cried more and more as she realised she’d have to go through it on her own and- oh gods.

Each time she and Rhys were intimate, he had his wings wide spread. They hadn’t made love with his wings vanished since before the proposal.

What if the baby had wings.

Would that rip her open?

There was no way she was so damned.

No way she had to endure the pain of Rhys leaving her- only for a few months till their child turned out to be the end of her.

And the months passed and passed.

Celine was so thankful for Elena and Matthias, as they kept true to their word and stayed with her through it all.

Elena, the healer she was, announced that the baby indeed had wings- and pointed out the obvious challenge because of this, but promised ti do her best during birth.

It wasn’t a really happy pregnancy, since she was still mourning the life she was supposed to have with Rhys.

Supposed to love this child, together.

And finally, labor day came.

There were screams, and wails, and broken pleas, as she was ripped open, due to the child’s wings.

There was blood- so, so much of it.

The child was finally out, wailing in the same was its mother was, as she was being stitched by her sister in law.

She remembers her brother’s cries as they nearly lost her. As this nearly cost her life. It was then she’d realised, that even if Rhys did come back one day, she’d never forgive him for this- never forgive him for making her go through all this on her own.

But all her anger vanished as Elena placed a tiny baby boy on her chest.

“Congratulations” she smiled at her “You did great”

“Have you decided on a name for him?” Matthias asked, admiring the baby, who was now in the hands of his mother.

Celine looked down at her son, and finally after months of pain, felt at peace.

“Nyx” tears rolled down her beautiful face.

“His name is Nyx”

~

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Finally posted this, I really hope you all like it❤️

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[lunainfortuna]

Rhysand grew up witnessing what a broken mating bond looked like.

He spent years watching what a failed, shattered relationship could be, even when it was tied by a sacred bond.

Such a thing is not unfamiliar to him, and surely, he must have wished for his mother’s freedom many times.

So why wouldn’t he see Elucien the same way?

Why is there not a single line in the books where Rhys, of all people, compares Elucien to his parents?

Why would he stop Elain from being free when he saw what happened to his mother?

No, sorry. Writing is about thinking meticulously about every detail; writing is about choosing.

And Sarah didn’t choose this path. Nor will she.

[scorpioriesling]

Enchanted

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Pairing(s): Rhysand x reader

Warnings: fluff

Summary: Every birthday girl makes a wish... yours has been the same for years. One you began to doubt would ever come true; but what happens when it does?

SR’s Note: I am honestly giggling and kicking my feet over this one, and lately Rhys hasn't even been my favorite... I don't care. I like how this turned out. Based on Enchanted by Taylor Swift, of course. Enjoy (:

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

Everything about the final day of Autumn was as it usually was; the cool sun bathing the Velaris cobblestone in light, the crisp breeze ruffling your hair, causing you to pull your cloak tighter around your shoulders. Even the townsfolk presented the same familiar faces you’d seen nearly every day now on your way to the public library.

Today was a treat; the day before your birthday, of course. The first day of the Winter season would mark the day of your birth, and usually you’d spend the day before spoiling yourself as you’d usually end up having to work on said birthday. This year, it was no different.

That is, before two large Illyrian warriors donning seven gleaming siphons each landed right in the middle of the square, their enormous bat wings spread wide. The townspeople, as well as yourself, whirled in shock at the sight. After straightening, the taller one (Cassian? You thought?) cleared his throat.

“Greetings, Velaris,” he said, voice echoing down every corridor and alleyway around you. Every wide-eyed fae stared back in awe as he looked from person to person.

“As you know, the High Lord will be having his annual Winter Ball tomorrow evening,” he continued. You’d known; it was an annual tradition. One you’d always ended up working as the bakery your parents owned supplied the delicacies for the event.

“…andddd this year, the High Lord has made it very clear that the celebration is to be extended.” He coughs. Gasps and murmurs begin around you, and you glance side to side as chatter begins.

“The ballroom cannot accommodate all of Velaris; so only a select few will be receiving invitations.” The spymaster calmly cuts in, and the chattering crowd around you stops. All eyes return to the pair in the middle of the street.

“The festivities are to be celebrated here in the city, though, should you not attend the ball,” Cassian fumbles. His brother raises his eyebrows, releasing a breath and gazing at the crowd once more.

“If you’re to be invited; you should expect to receive an invitation in your mailbox by this afternoon.”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

You practically jumped on the mail man when he approached your drive, scaring him half to death as his letters tumbled from his hands.

“I’m so sorry! I’m, um… just, really hoping something came for me today.” You laugh sheepishly as he thrusts a pile of letters into your hands.

“Yeah, you and every other female in Velaris.” He continues on his route with a hmmph, and you begin anxiously thumbing through the letters.

You almost trip when you finally make it back into your small flat, sitting at the kitchen table. Your hand shakes as you get to the last envelope in the pile, only one elegant word written across the front of it.

Y/N.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

“I don’t know if that’s the right… I don’t know, color?” Your best friend eyes you in the mirror, and you twist to one side, meeting her eyes in the mirror.

“Maybe not. I don’t know, it’s just not quite… right.” She says, the statement only a repetition of how your morning’s been going. You’ve spent the entire morning trying to find a gown for the ball tonight, but every single one you’ve tried just isn’t quite… the one.

You let out a frustrated sigh, and your friend / shop owner flits toward a wall of dresses, brushing through them once more.

“I feel like I’ve tried on a million,” you say. She returns just a moment later, a lovely steel silver gown in hand. You raise your brows at her.

“Yes, but, it’d be dress one million and one that might catch the High Lord’s attention.” You can’t help but blush, turning from her. It was no secret you found the High Lord of the Night Court quite intriguing; Gods, half of Prythian did.

She tsked at you and shooed you towards the dressing chamber, only for you to reappear a moment later in the gown. She didn’t hide back the gasp, or stunned expression on her face as you approached the mirror to look yourself.

“Oh come now, it can’t be…” But, it was. Seeing it in the reflection, you understood her reaction a little more. You were breathtaking; this one. It had to be this one.

You spend a good few minutes twirling, admiring the gown hugging you in all the right places. You finally glance down at the price tag, and your heart sinks. It was way too expensive.

“I don’t think I can…” You say. Your friend shakes her head, leading you back to the dressing room to change.

“Nonsense.” She says. You stare at her, a blank expression on your face.

“I can’t afford it.” You say. She only winks at you before shutting the chamber curtain, allowing you privacy.

“Consider it a birthday gift!”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

You'd never been to one of these before; not coming from a wealthy family, or even being High Fae yourself, there was never any reason to attend such an event held by Night Court royalty.

Yet, here you stood. In front of the polished black gate, separating you from the awaiting festivities inside.

"Uhh.. miss?" You turn, to see another guest had silently approached at your side. "Are you going in?"

You nod. "Yes! Yes, I'm sorry if I held you up-" He shakes his head, a small smile offerred to you as the gates open and he steps beyond. He looks over his shoulder to you.

"No worries... but, I think it's beginning soon?" You hear the groaning of the iron bars and quickly step inside, keeping in step with this new aquiantence. You politely converse until you've reached the main building, and females in lovely gowns pass by you. You nervously look around; maybe you should've prepared better for this.

"I'll see you around," with a small wave, your company stalks off toward a group of males he seems to know. You sigh, taking in the beauty around you. The gleaming faelights, all of the attendees meandering around you, the scent of jasmine in the air-

"I personally want to thank you all for your attendance tonight," you hear, and the room is instantly filled with silence. All eyes are peering toward the front of the room, and the crowd shuffles together to hear the speaker more clearly. You try and get a good look, but you can't really see over everyone's heads.

"I haven't had one of these events in a while where I get to invite our court's friends to join us, and as this marks the first night of Winter," the voice drawls. It sounds lovely, as though it was coming from a cello - deep and smooth. Not like the sounds from Azriel or Cassian, but this one was much different.

"...we are very happy you're all here. So, let the dancing commence!" And with that, the crowd is in a frenzy, chattering and partnering off for the first dance of the evening. Your cheeks heat in embarassment as you realize you have no one to dance with, and you recede towards the stone wall to hide in the shadows for this one. You feel a light hand on your elbow, and you whirl around to come face-to-face with the kind male from earlier.

"I don't have a partner either..." He says, his cheeks flushing rosey-pink. You give him a soft smile, your embarassment fading with every passing second.

"I'd love to dance with you." You slide your hand into his and pull him to the middle of the crowd, just as the music begins. His hand rests on your lower back, the cold metal ring on his finger sending a chill up your spine. You suck in a breath as he pulls you closer to his chest.

"Is this... alright?" He asks. You nod, resting your free hand on his shoulder. Now that you're close to him, you get a better view of his face; his sharp jaw, auburn freckles dusting over his nose. His sultry amber eyes that match the flaming locks upon his head; he truly is beautiful.

But not the reason you came tonight.

He engages in polite conversation as you continue the waltz, asking you about yourself, laughing and making light jokes with you inbetween the spinning and dipping as the music intensifies. You laugh with him, appreciating him more and more by the minute. When he's turned you around, his back to the dias at the head of the room, you swear you meet those violet eyes, staring right back at you. Maybe you're just thinking wishfully, maybe... maybe he is just looking at everyone, but he looked irritated, besides the sweet sentiment he'd made before.

You have to look away, your partner realizing you're staring.

"Is, everything okay?" He politely asks you. You nod, reassuring him everything was. But it wasn't. You were living in this moment; the music, the liveliness of the room, the way you were pushed so close with this male's hand on your waist-

But it still wasn't who you wanted.

You wanted him.

His hands on you. Your body against him. His eyes looking into yours.

You felt like a fool for thinking that coming here would change anything for you.

"I, uhm," your partner fumbles for words to distract you. "I didn't catch your name?" He asks. You meet his gaze, smiling again at him. You knew the High Lord wouldn't need or want you, so you may as well make the most of your night while it lasts.

"Y/N," you reply. He grins.

"What a lovely name," he tucks a flyaway tendril of hair behind your ear, eyes catching when it is exposed. He immediately sees it is rounded; and shame courses through you again as you know he is High Fae.

He clears his throat. "What a beautiful name," he reiterates. "...for a beautiful girl." You can't help but blush at his words, this male is laying the flirting on you thick. Doing quite well at that, too.

"Why thank you," you say, voice feeling small. You didn't register that the song had already changed, your bodies abseltmindedly falling into rhythm as you continue to sway with the music.

"I should probably relieve you from me," he says, dipping his head and huffing a small smirk. "Had I known who you were, I would have let you dance with someone else. I'm sure Rhys will have my ass for this anyway," he concludes. You furrow a brow, as the song engages in the final chorus.

"Whatever do you mean?" You ask. He opens his mouth to answer, but clapping erupts and conversations get too loud around you. What was he even talking about? You'd never met the High Lord, not officially, anyway. Maybe in passing, but there was nothing there.

Suddenly the room feels too small, too warm, his hand on your back feels like fire and you feel like you are sweating. You could pass out, you just needed a minute to breathe and get out of this crowded room.

"I have to um," you shout, over the loud conversing around you. "I need a breath of air!" You say. He nods, and pulls you close, hands still holding yours.

"Do you want me to come with you?" He politely asks. You lean back, meeting his eyes and shake your head.

"I'll be fine!" You say loudly. He nods, and you lean up and kiss his cheek. "I'll find you later?" You say, and he grins at you. What a cutie.

You search for an exit, clammy hands brushing the sides of your skirts. You find an open doorway, and travel down a side hall that leads to an unmarked door. Chest tight, you open it -- revealing the most wonderful sight you've ever seen.

You step out onto the stone terrace, walking all the way to the railed edge to get the best view. You let out a gasp; you can see all of Velaris from here. Soft music echoes from beyond, and you watch as a single shooting star stretches across the sky.

"This is, my favorite place to see the whole city too." You turn abruptly, not realizing someone had followed you. You stare in shock as Rhysand leans against the open doorway, arms folded, and one ankle crossed over the other. You immediately get embarassed again, remembering this is his building and his terrace and you were out here without permission-

"No need to worry, darling." He strides over to you, and you feel a tiny tickling inside your head. Your fingers brush your temple on instinct, and you remember that he could in fact see what you were thinking.

"Enjoying the ball?" He asks, his silky tenor causing your attempt to clear your mind to fail. You huff, turning back to the city beyond. He puts his hands on the balcony railing next to you, one hand nearly brushing yours.

"Oh! Um... yes. Yes I have been." Your mind flashes to the dances you'd shared with the readhead, how he held you, and how you'd wished it was Rhys the whole time...

Clear your mind, Cauldron! He could easily see what you were thinking.

"That's... great." His sudden clipped tone had you side-eyeing him. The night seemed to radiate off of him, the onyx crown atop his head gleaming in the moonlight. He was definately intimidating, but you remembered what your new friend said. Did you even catch his name? No. You were too focused on the High Lord, though this other man was nothing but nice to you.

Cauldron, boil you.

"Can I ask you something?" You say. He angles his head to you, a small smirk pulling the corner of his lips up.

"You'd like to know why I asked you here tonight?" He answers. You gape at him, and he chuckles, the sound like soft rain outside an open window.

"How did you-" You begin, and he turns to you, a hand tracing his knucles down the side of your face. You flush at the contact, as this was something you'd only ever hope for in a dream.

"This... is something we can work on later." He looks at the top of your head, the idea of mind shielding grazing your brain.

Has he been inside your head this whole time?

You almost feel violated; if it was anyone but him, you'd tell them to leave you be. But... you couldn't. He was finally here, with you -- but, you can't help from a little bit of your attitude peeking through.

"If you wanted me here so damn bad, whatever the reason may be," you start, pulling back an inch from his touch. His brows raise in amusement. "Why were you pouting about in there? I didn't even see you dance once." You finish. His gaze softens, and his free hand brushes yours on the railing. The hand that once grazed your cheek is now gliding down your arm, tracing over every inch of exposed skin.

"The partner I wanted was already taken." He answers lowly. You don't miss the way his eyes darken a bit, and you bite the inside of your cheek hard to try and stop from freaking out and dissolving into a puddle right then and there.

"Well..." You begin, taking one step closer to him. The soft scent of sea salt and nectarines graces your nose -- of course, one of your favorites. His gaze stays locked on you, drinking in every inch of you with his eyes.

"I'm not now." You say, as confidently as you can muster. His lips twist, trying to supress the huge smile he eventually allows to take over his face. You can't help but smile back; his gorgeous features only more enticing up close. His hand slips around the curve of your waist, pulling you in closer. Your breath catches, as his other hand guides your idle ones to his neck.

"I've waited much too long for this," he says. You are sure you look like a tomato; there was no way he was fawning over you like this. The way you'd done, every night in your room; every day in Velaris, constant reminders of him all over the city; every year when you'd use your bithday wish just to see him, just once -- and there he would be, waltzing into your parents shop before the ball as if he wasn't reducing you to mush each time.

"I'm not very good," he admits with a small laugh. You don't know what the hell comes over you, but you don't allow him enough time to read your mind before the words are spilling out-

"I don't need good. I need you." You take the lead, swaying to the distant music from the walls beyond and streets below, and he only follows. Its his turn to feel flattered, as his hands gently trail up and down your waist. You try your best to keep from shaking in excitement; but it isn't long before you see another star flying across the sky. He glances in your line of sight, grinning and letting one hand go of you. He takes the gleaming onyx crown off his head, replacing it atop yours, tucked behind the brained crown near the top.

You stare at him wide eyed as he pulls your body flush with his, leaning in to whisper, "I'm enchanted to finally meet you," as his soft lips lightly graze the shell of your ear. You can't help but let out a small chuckle, not knowing if you are going to cry or not. You could; you'd only wished for this very thing for years and years.

"You truly are a princess," he drawls on, fingers tracing your jaw lightly. His gaze flicks to the star trailing across the sky, and back to you once more. "One that still needs to make her birthday wish."

Your hands play with the soft hair near the nape of his neck, eyes loving the way he practically wills your mouth to his. It's like there is a thread, a rope connecting the two of you, and he is using his end to pull you closer, closer...

He finally kisses you, softly cupping your jaw as your hands slide down his chest. Pressed against him like this, that rope feels more like a threat tied so tight, golden aura coming from deep within you at the scene around you. He slowly pulls back, eyes searching yours for reassurance. You only reach up and swipe a tear away from his cheek, the new feeling connecting the two of you reassurance enough.

"I don't have one this year; it has already come true."

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *

[courtofstarsanddreamers]

A Quiet Moment

A short bit of domestic fluff for Feysand (feat. Nyx)

You can read it and comment on AO3 here

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“Nyx is asleep.”

“Oh, thank the gods,” Rhys sighed, unceremoniously depositing the correspondence he had brought to the couch with him onto the nearest flat surface, making room for Feyre to sink down next to him. He pulled her in, humming quietly as her head rested against his shoulder. “I didn’t think any living thing could be louder than Cassian, but that child’s crying has proven me woefully incorrect.”  

Feyre snorted softly, leaning into his touch as he stroked a gentle hand down her hair.  

They were both exhausted.  

Between caring for their son and keeping the Night Court running smoothly, hardly an hour passed in a day when they weren’t being run ragged. It didn’t help that Nyx had started teething, and he had made his displeasure with that fact well known to anyone brave enough to hold him through his cries.  

It was rare, having this moment now between the two of them, Nyx fast asleep and no planned meeting or unavoidable task on either of their agendas. Sure, there were plenty of responsibilities they could be tending to. Things that were piling up with every moment they sat here, idle, but Rhys couldn’t bring himself to care as his eyelids fluttered shut under the weight of several days with little to no rest.  

The young cocksure Illyrian warrior he had once been would laugh to see him now. The thought made him smile in spite of himself.  

In the months and years before their son had made his appearance into the world, Rhys would have used this spare moment, any spare moment, to drag Feyre up to their bedroom and get the two of them naked as quickly as possible. To release that seemingly endless tension that sizzled between them.  

Now…  

The thought of even getting to his feet made his body ache. He knew Feyre felt the same. Worse probably, since she was the only one of the two of them able to feed the babe when he woke up screaming in the middle of the night.  

Rhys pressed a kiss to her temple, about as much intimacy as he could muster at the moment.  

“I can’t wait until he’s old enough to send him off to train with the Illyrians,” he murmured, forehead pressed to the side of her head as he breathed in her scent, the scent of their child still clinging to her.  

“You mean that place that gave you, Cass, and Az lasting childhood trauma?” Feyre mused, her hand coming to rest against his stomach. “I don’t think so.” 

“We’ll discuss it later.”  

“I’m not sending our heir into some battle to the death just to prove himself as a warrior.” 

“My father did so with me, and everything turned out just fine.” 

“I don’t think your father is the gold standard you should set for your parenting, Rhys,” she teased, but there was an undercurrent of something heavier there and when Rhysand blinked open tired eyes he saw her brow furrowed.  

He kissed it, and smoothing out the worry just a bit. “No,” he hummed, “probably not.”  

But still, Nyx would have to train. He was more Illyrian than Rhys himself thanks to Feyre’s shapeshifting during his conception. He would need to learn how to control that power in ways that they couldn’t teach him from the safety of their estate in Velaris.  

Besides, between himself, Cass, and Az, Nyx would always have someone looking out for him in Illyria. The other kids would hate him for it–hell, Nyx might end up hating them for it–but they’d keep an eye out.  

“You still with me?” Feyre prodded softly, fingers stroking his side through his jacket as they breathed in peaceful tandem, the house around them miraculously quiet for once. 

“Barely.” Sleep was tugging at him as insistently as the mating bond. They should go to bed. He should carry Feyre up to bed, lord knew she deserved to rest. But Rhys couldn’t force his body to move a single muscle. 

Feyre didn’t seem to mind. She adjusted a moment later, tucking her feet up onto the couch and laying down, head in his lap, soft hair splayed over his thighs and those gorgeous full lips parted in a sleepy sigh.  

You look like an angel.  

He let the words float down the bond, too content with the silence around them to break it by speaking aloud. Her lips twitched up as she nuzzled into his lap.  

He fell asleep right there on the couch, hand still resting atop Feyre’s head, fingers slack where they wove between strands of silky hair. By some small blessing, Nyx didn’t wake for hours. At some point, another member of their family must have walked in, seen the two of them, and laid a blanket over Feyre, because when Rhys did awake, she was tucked in and warm, breathing so peacefully it made his heart swell.  

He extricated himself from the situation carefully. Slowly. Not daring to wake his mate. But he did carry her to the bed finally, using his powers to soften each movement as he climbed the stairs and laid her out on the bed, pressed a tender kiss to her forehead. A soft grunt escaped her as she shifted, finding a comfortable position once again, and Rhys just smiled.  

His mate, the mother of their child, and High Lady of this court that they both called home.  

He would never stop wondering what he did to deserve such a blessing.  

He tucked the blankets up to her chin and murmured into the warmth of their shared bedroom, “Sleep, Feyre darling.” There would no doubt be more pressing concerns when she awoke, more correspondence to reply to, more meetings to attend, more people to save. And their beautiful baby boy to look after. But for now, with a soft smile that seemed to glow from within as Rhysand quietly shut the door behind him, he would let Feyre sleep.  

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[lovemyromance]

why are we acting like it's such a crazy idea that the Elucien mating bond is fake/wrong or that Elain might have 2 bonds??

Evidence:

Elain& Lucien literally don't act like any other mates we have seen in ACOTAR. They avoid each other like 99% of the time (by choice). And no, I'm sorry, but shrinking away from Lucien and flat out leaving the room when he's there is NOT the same as Feyre throwing a shoe at Rhys and Nesta kicking Cassian in the balls. There's a thin line between love and hate, but there's an ocean of indifference. Feyre & Nesta were not *uncomfortable* around Rhys & Cassian. Elain is uncomfortable around Lucien. Feyre/Nesta could not stay away from their mates- literally Nesta avoided Cassian for a grand total of 30 pages maybe. Elucien vs Feysand/Nessian is NOT the same.

SJM has already written a pairing where both people were "given to another", thought to have a mating bond with someone else that turned out to be fake. Then they ended up being "true mates" i.e. this isn't something Elriels just made up. SJM has literally done it before with Rowan & Aelin. She didn't care much for being a "fated mates" author when she broke up Rowan and Lydia, did she?

Feyre questions the bond between Elucien twice. She even suggests "Why not make them mates" in regards to Azriel & Elain. Let me be crystal clear when I say this: Feyre saw Nesta hissing and spitting at Cassian for 3 books before they got together and not once did Feyre ever question the Nessian bond. Sure she didn't *know* for sure they were mates, but I'm sure she suspected enough. She did not once hesitate to leave Cassian with Nesta.

In the ACOTAR world, SJM has made it clear not all mates were love matches. If every "fated mates" couple was meant to be an eternal, beautiful bond of love - then why did she write Rhys's & Tamlin's parents as being mates that despised each other? If every single mating bond in the. ACOTAR universe was happily mated and in love, then I wouldn't be arguing against the Elucien bond. But they're not. If SJM believed that all fated mates are living in happily ever after - why did she write about the cauldron not pairing people up for love but for powerful offspring? Why did she write about Rhys & Tamlin's parents? You can't say SJM is a fated mates author and all fated mates end up happy and in love if that is not the case, even in the same series.

SJM has tweeted back in like 2017 about how it's possible for someone to have two mates

It's literally all there in the text. No deep analysis needed, no "omg I think this shadow over this leaf means that Elain and azriel are foreshadowed" crazy reaches. simply picking up what SJM has already put down. She is painstakingly building Elriel brick by brick in the background, and if you don't realize it until the house is built, that's on you bestie. Not Elriels. Not SJM.

[throneofsapphics]

Hi, how are you? I wanted to do it and ask for it from Nyx, where it comes home with a different smell.

busybodies

Summary: Nyx tries to hide his partner.

Warnings: mentions of drinking

A/N: thank you for the request! this is actually how I picture that going

Nyx knew he couldn’t hide anything from his parents, not in his current state, and didn’t bother trying. Instead, he avoided eye contact, and headed straight to his room. He’d spent a night out in Velaris, disguising himself as best as possible, and winnowed back to the River Estate, still wearing off some of the whiskey. He’d kept his partner separate from his family on purpose, because even if they were just supposed to meet his parents the entire inner circle would show up, and likely leave him single again. 

Less than an hour later, his uncle knocked on the door. Only a courtesy, considering he barged right in anyways with a shit-eating grin on his face. 

“Up to no good?” Cassian asked, leaning back against the door, arms crossed over his chest. 

“None of your business.” Nyx snapped. He raised his brows, as if to say it’s everyone’s business. It isn’t, but the entire inner circle makes everything their business. 

“Are they pretty?” 

Nyx glared at him, apparently harsh enough because Cassian walked backwards out the door, hands held up in a placating way. 

-

“When do we get to meet them?” Feyre asked casually at dinner, taking a sip of her wine to hide her smile. Her son glared at her, and she didn’t need to test to know his mental shields were perfectly intact. They’d never invade his privacy like that without good reason, and she’d already told Rhys several times that this was not a good enough reason. 

“Don’t ignore your mother,” Rhys chastised. 

Nyx huffed, and narrowed his eyes at both of them. “Never, at this rate.” 

Feyre chuckled, and returned to her dinner. Cassian still had a grin on his face, and she had a sense the unlucky soul might end up with a visit from the General, considering her son hadn’t even bothered to try and disguise his scent.

[fuckyesfeysand]

Creator #21 - @littedidyouknow

Welcome back to Feysand Creator Highlights!! We want to take a moment to recognize the amazing individuals in our fandom who kindly use up so much of their freetime and creative energy to share their work with us!

Today's creator highlight is for the prolific @littedidyouknow! Coming to the fandom just this year, they've already gifted us 17 works and hundreds of thousands of lovely words. Not to mention being incredibly kind and supportive friend of other fandom writers and creators!

@littedidyouknow started off with the wonderful single-parent AU We Can Learn to Love Again and has been making us cry (good) tears ever since, keeping the story going with a sequel and several spin offs. Working primarily with modern AUs, they'll take you through the heartbreak and joys of healing journeys. We're especially in love with their baby Nyx and the stories of Feyre and Rhys as parents.

There's so much to read and fall in love with - find everything on their Masterlist HERE and their AO3 page (as littledidyouknow). We've highlighted some of their works below!

Fanfic:

We Can Learn to Love Again -

Feyre has healed. It was a long journey, but she has finally healed, and she is happy. More than she thought she might be.

She went through hell and back, but she is finally fine: a single parent, teaching children how to express themselves through art, and she is fine.

But she has yet to love again. And that's maybe the most terrifying part.

I'm On My Way To You -

When she dreams, it’s always as if she’s waking up somewhere else.

Waking up as someone else.

Piece written for Feysandweek 2024 Inspired by the movie Your name.

Play Me A Memory -

Every Thursday night, Feyre goes to a bar. And every Thursday night, she finds herself enthralled and absolutely captivated by the music they play here.

It makes her feel alive, it makes her feel complete. It makes her feel seen.

Piece written for Feysandweek 2024

Fic inspired by the song ‘Piano man’ by Billy Joel.

Thank you for sharing your work with us and making the fandom a better place!

Want to nominate someone? Fill out the form HERE

[highladyjane]

Love vs. Fate

ACOTAR foreshadowed the whole love triangle with this

Which I believe is the background for this part of this interview - where sure, Sarah may try to play things off:

But I find that interesting, because TOG's ending clearly said this (Kingdom of Ash, Ch.98)

And CC's ending said this (House of Flame and Shadow, Ch. 98)

So isn't it funny that all of SJM's books are all about defying Gods, Odds, and Fate through acts of True Love, aaaand people still think that Elain, Azriel, AND Lucien are just going to do what everyone and that corrupted Cauldron expects and tells them to do in the end because "Sarah's a fated mates author", and because that's what they've been doing their whole lives prior to encountering each other?

Can't people connect the dots and see the real pattern of her books? Because it's pretty frickin' obvious to me.

"What if the Cauldron was wrong?" is just the beginning of fighting for that HEA.

And I am sorry, not sorry, because as of ACOFAS, ACOSF, and the bonus chapters, there's not a single hint of Elain wanting to bridge the gap with her Cauldron-given mate... But rather a lot of her initiating the bridging of a gap between her and a certain Shadowsinger/Spymaster who confirms in his very own POV that he has feelings for her, but has been trying to stay away because he struggles with feelings of unworthiness - especially because a damned Cauldron gave her to another on top of that.

So if Elain's choosing anyone, it won't be because of any mating bond. No, Elain...

I may be primarily pro Elriel but I'm also pro-Lucien, so I want him to be happy too. I just think he deserves someone who readily wants and chooses him back, mating bond or not... So I am pretty sure he's asking the very same questions Az is asking. Sure, Elucien can still happen -there's just going to have to be a great deal of retconning, including ignoring all the build-up and crumbs Sarah has scattered throughout her books to make it feel unforced. But just like with Rhys' or Tamlin's etc. parents, not everyone accepting their mating bond is going to guarantee a HEA. And once Lucien finds out about his true parentage and the truth about the Cauldron, now that he's an exile with no High Lord to submit to... I'm pretty sure he's going to start finally fighting about what he truly thinks is right and his own freedom to choose and to love - something he didn't get to do for Jesminda. And no, it wouldn't be through a Blood Duel for a mate that was "thrown at him".

So there's no need for "I just want ______ to be happy" or "_____ doesn't deserve ______." Because none of these 3 are going to end up without a HEA in an SJM book where a character can barely stay dead for longer than 3 minutes.

[readychilledwine]

The Story of Us

Summary - After Nyx is given a school project on his family, the Inner Circles Quad is stuck trying to explain their love life to their nephew.

Prompt Day 1 - Beginnings

Warnings - Nyx is smart and sassy, flashbacks, kind of forced mating bond, jealousy and fighting, rough patches before a happy ending, slightly implied smut

A/n - Happy @polyacotarweek

This is based on one of my friends having to explain this similar situation to her daughters. We, as a society, could do so much for eliminating stereotypes in the poly community if we openly discussed it and normalized it with kids. Her daughters have been raised in a household with a Quad and see the love their parents share as completely normal, and isn't that such a beautiful thing? To be able to freely love without judgement.

Peep the Poly+Acotarweek Masterlist here

Nyx blinked so innocently at you. His tiny fist gripped his pencil as he mimicked your blinking, waiting for you, Azriel, Nesta, or Cassian to answer him. Rhys and Feyre stood behind him with shit eating grins, waiting for how you all would respond.

The heir stared mainly at you, his damn near mirror image,  as you looked up at your older brother Rhys and then back down to your nephew. “Auntie Y/n, I need to know! It's for school,” his little face pouted, and all eyes landed on you.

You sighed, leaning your elbows top your knees. “Well, baby, I don't know how to explain or where you want me to start.” 

Nyx huffed, looking at you like you were stupid and making Rhys further chuckle. “I know you sleep with Uncle Cassian,” the mentioned male spit out his water, praying their nephew simply meant sharing a bed and not other activities. “And Auntie Ness,” Nesta held no reaction, not even an ounce of shame. “And Uncle Azzy.” Azriel looked away, scratching his jaw line. “And last weekend when I came up to surprise you, all four of you were in one bed and Uncle Cass made me wait before I could snuggle, and daddy only makes me do that when he and mommy -"

Rhys covered Nyx's mouth, his own face flushed as Feyre's ears turned pink. “What he wants to know is how to explain the dynamic.” Since you know for our kind this is not normal, Rhys said gently into your mind. A three-way bond is rare. A 4-way bond is unheard of.

Azriel spoke softly. “We all love each other, Nyx,” he said it like it was the easiest thing to explain to a child with parents who enjoy their monogamous marriage and traditional mating bond, as if Nyx would just understand. “We all love each other so much, and we all enjoy being together. All the time.”

Nyx rolled his eyes. “I know. But how?” He waited again, brows raised and a small pout growing in his face.

Cassian smiled nodding to you. “You tell him, princess.” 

You looked at Az, the smile on his face told every single emotion he had. “A long long loooooong time ago,” Nyx giggled as you held the vowel, “Your daddy and Uncle Cass brought home this weird,” a soft watch it came from beside you, “but kind of cute Illyrian, and I had my first crush.”

The quiet male standing behind Rhys and Cassian rocked back and forth on his feet as you looked at him. He was beautiful, all be it, awkward, but still beautiful. “Sis, meet Azriel,” you waved from behind your mother's leg. “He's going to live with us.”

“Third brother!” Cassian threw his arms up, yelling and then hugging the male with scarred hands and damaged wings tightly.

“Brother!” Rhys then also went in to hug him, rambling about all the cool things they'd be doing together. Hazel eyes met yours, and plush lips mouthed, “Help me.”

You smiled softly at him, offering him a hand and pulling him away from the idiots around you two. "Do you like chocolate?" He nodded at you, a soft smile tugging at his lips before it disappeared. "Good."

“They were inseparable after that,” Cassian grumbled. His tone was filled with old aching jealousy. “Unless Azriel was training or agreed to hang out with us. He was with y/n.”

The sparkle in Nyx's eye as he looked at where you and Azriel sat, lost to all of them as the male kissed your knuckles made Cassian's heart skip. “Did they know they were mates?”

“No,” Cassian was soft now. “That happened under different circumstances.”

"I've apologized many times, Cassian." Azriel stared towards the larger male. "Will you ever actually forgive us?"

"It's not you two I still hold anger towards."

Cassian had you alone. Finally alone.

You had been courting for months now, but every date always had at least one tag along. The kiss you two were in was frantic and heated as he held you against the wall. His teeth pulled at your bottom lip, smirking as you gasped softly and gave him more access to you. His lips moved to your neck, pulling the dress you had worn out of the way.

Cassian shivered as you whispered his name. Loving how he could reduce his educated little princess to nothing more than a girl desperate for his touch. You both jumped as the door slammed shut, two arguing voices carrying through the house. “Y/n!” You sighed as Cassian's grip grew tighter. “Cass!”

Azriel walked in seconds later, eyes going wide as he stood there in shock. It took him a moment, composing himself the best he could while looking just at you. “Your father is here. He will be coming to the house any second now.”Azriel's mind was slowly becoming a storm as he walked away. Allowing you to compose yourself before your father came and demanded dinner with his son, daughter, and their tagalongs. Your mother was trapped in Velaris heavily pregnant, unable to help you all, to help him. Of all the times for a bond to snap, it had to be while your legs were wrapped around Cassian, delicate fingers threaded through his hair. 

You were downstairs, setting the table quickly. Silently grateful you had planned to cook enough for a small army to ensure there was food for Rhys and Azriel. You felt him long before he spoke. That dominating presence just sucking the life and air from the happy cabin.

“Ah, little star,” soft hands held your jaw from behind. “You smell..” His nose was in your hair as your eyes shut, sniffing it deeply to place whatever scent he had caught. “Interesting. We will discuss you degrading yourself late." A pointed look when Rhysand's way, causing your older brother to flinch internally before shielding Cassian from any attacks. "Serve dinner, y/n. We have much to discuss.”

“So grandpa made Auntie serve Uncle Az dinner? And Auntie was dating Uncle Cass?”

Rhys nodded from the spot he had now taken next to Nyx. “Yes.”

“But that meant her and Uncle Az were married now.” You all couldn't help but smile at Nyx's innocence of what had happened that night. “But that's not fair.” 

“No buddy, it wasn't,” Cassian looked at you and Azriel. “It took us a while to be friends again.”

"But again," Azriel waited until Nyx looked to him. "We love each other. So we wanted to become friends again."

“What made you two friends?”

The question caused silence to hang in the air as you suddenly moved close into Nesta, seeking her comfort to stop you from crying. Azriel took a deep breath, “We lost some people, and Uncle Cass saved Auntie Y/n.”

"Like a knight saving a princess!"

Cassian scented your blood as the warriors ran to where the reports of a disturbance came from. It mixed heavily with the scent of soil, of your mother's blood, of little Stel’s blood.

He felt a weird pulling. As if something was desperately clawing at his chest, begging him to find you, and when he did, he went silent. 

You were unconscious on the ground, wings carved from your back, bruising everywhere. He flew you to your father, growling as healers ripped you from his arms. “How did you find her before I did?” Azriel's eyes were cold, staring at him from across the room.

“She called for me.” Cassian refused to leave your side as you healed. He was the first to hold you when you woke up, the one to teach you how to walk again. As much as it had irritated Azriel, the shadowsinger felt it, too. A strained pull bringing the three of you together. Binding your lives and very souls.

“So the three of you all dated?” 

“Yeah,” Azriel leaned forward, reading Nyx carefully. “And you know how Auntie Ness got involved. Does it bother you?”

A little lip trembled. “If you all love each other, how can you love me?” 

Nesta was to him instantly. Cradling her little life line so tight. “It's different, baby. But there's so much love for you. All the love for you. We'd all do anything for you, Nyx. We all love you so so much."

You moved by him, too, kissing a small hand. "Some people have so much love to give that their hearts overflow, Nyx. Trust us, we love you as much, if not almost more, than we love each other." You kissed his palm again. "But that doesn't answer the question, baby. Does it bother you that we all are married?"

Nyx thought for a while, young eyes filled with so much hope and knowledge studying each of you. "No. It's my favorite."

Silence fell between the 4 of you that night. “Do you think he understands?” You were the first to break the quiet. “Do we need to stop until he gets it?”

“If we don't raise him with this being the norm, he will never see it as a norm,” Cassian sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. “He needs to grow up knowing it's normal for some people to love more than one person like this. Not everyone has one love of their life, y/n. Some of us get the honor of falling in love over and over again."

“I've never heard the full story.” Nesta moved next to Azriel. “Of how you three began. I have a feeling you left details out.” 

You answered plainly. “Several fights. Verbal and physical. A lot crying. A lot of sex. Rhys yelled a lot. Like. More than he ever has at you. I got locked in the Palace by father at one point."

“So what was the final decision? What made two three?”

Cassian, you, and Azriel all smiled. “The first Solstice with Rhys trapped Under the Mountain.”

You refused to leave bed. Refused to eat. You refused to so much as even think about solstice without your brother. 

It felt wrong.

Like you were playing this role of someone you were never meant to play. You stayed in his room, Azriel, Cassian, Mor, and Amren long forgotten. You had not spoken with your mates since Rhys left your head, whispering soft words of how much you mean to him, of how his greatest joy in life was being your big brother. 

You didn't even respond as the door opened and the bed dipped in two places. “We miss him too,” Cassian moved his hand to find yours under the blanket. “We tried having a snowball fight, but it just didn't feel right.”

Azriel hummed from where he had moved to lay behind you. “Not just because Rhysand is missing, but our girl wasn't there cheering us on from the sidelines.” 

“I'm sorry-”

“Do not apologize, princess.” Cassian laid next to you then, too. “If this is where you'd like to be today, we need to be good mates and be here, too.” 

Azriel's lips pressed softly on your shoulder. “We were hoping Solstice would be extra special this year. Cassian and I have talked a lot, and we both think there's enough love inside of all of us to make this work.”

Your eyes lit up instantly. “Really?”

Cassian nodded. “I loved you long before he came into the picture, and I've realized slowly how much I love him as well.”

“And I feel the same,” Azriel moved a hand to rest above yours and Cassian's. “And I know you do, starlight.” 

“So this is my solstice present? No more fighting?” 

“No more fighting,” they confirmed together.

“Rhys would be so happy. I wish he was here.”

The two males shared a look. One sparing glance. Azriel brushed soft onyx colored hair from your face. "We do too. Do you know what Rhys would have liked for Solstice?"

Cassian kissed your shoulder, finishing Azriel's thought. "You to eat something."

“And then 50 years later you came,” you smiled so softly. “And you shook everything I'd ever thought about myself.”

Nesta's face flushed. “Was I?”

“My first and last time with a female.”

“Oh,” Nesta's hands played with the hem of her dress. “When I was human, I never imagined this. The first time I saw the first of you together, I didn't know what to think.”

Cassian smiled, “We're a lot.”

“It wasn't that. I.. Deep down I wanted to be a part of it from the first dinner. It was like-”

“You found home?” Azriel ran a finger down her cheek. “You sure as fuck fought it, Ness.”

“Because it was scary. Loving so many people so deeply is terrifying.”

“And magical.” 

She looked at you, and nodded to confirm. “Beyond magical.”

“Yes. It is.”

Cassian smacked your ass slightly before standing. “Rhys said Nyx is going to say we all just live together and love each other a lot and he likes it.”

Azriel stood behind him. “Separate beds tonight or one?”

“One,” the general answered with a shrug. “We will see you two in bed.”

You both wished them goodnight as Nesta smiled softly into the fire. You leaned to her, holding those perfect manicured hands. She smiled before laughing out a soft what. “I know it's still strange for you, but it's amazing how much room we all truly have for people in our hearts, if we're brave enough to allow them in.” 

“Sometimes my heart is so full, I just worry I will wake up and it's all been a lie.”

“Never, Ness. I have you. You have me. We have them. They have us, and the beautiful thing is that love flows freely. And it always will, so long as you wish for it to.”

“I love you, y/n.”

“And I love you, Nesta. Let's go to bed and hope our nephew doesn't make us look like heathens.”

“There's no one else I'd rather be a heathen with,” soft lips met yours before resting a forehead against yours. “You were my favorite to fall in love with. You know that?”

“Really?” The oldest Archeron nodded. “Tell me our story from your eyes someday?”

“I will.”

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[cressidagrey]

New Pursuits - Chapter 5: Hiking

Summary:

The shadows decide that Azriel needs a hobby.

5 times when said hobby-related shenanigans didn’t end so well…and the one time where it may end up better than Azriel could ever have imagined.

Warnings:

Rhys bashing, Death of a mythical Wolf, Skinning of the same, animal furs, Light injuries

(super pretty dividers thanks to @saradika)

To say that his next pursuit in search for a hobby went to absolute shit…well that was an understatement.

It started off well enough. 

Hiking, Master! The shadows suggested brightly. 

Hiking. He could do hiking. 

What was the worst thing that could happen?

Any specific place? He wondered. He fully expected them to suggest something outside Velairs…maybe somewhere near where Morrigan kept her country estate that she pretended none of them knew about. It was ridiculous. Of course, Azriel knew about that. 

The same way that he knew that Mor was never going to be interested in him and he had still yearned for her for fucking centuries even when he had known better. 

Sometimes he was just an absolute fool, was he not?

Why not Ramiel?

If he had been drinking, he would have spit it out. That was the last suggestion he had expected. Ramiel ? Had the shadows gone fucking insane? 

It’s beautiful there! And maybe this time we won’t need to kill stupid fucking idiots that think we don’t deserve to exist! 

So he gave in. Like an idiot. 

And the next time he had some free time… he went flying to Ramiel. 

You know I could just fly to the peak and be done, he told them drily. Why not. His wings weren’t bound. It wasn’t the fucking Blood Rite. 

He stood at the bottom of Ramiel, staring up at that fucking mountain that had nearly claimed his life once before. 

It was sacred. To Illyrians. To his people. Even when Azriel often didn’t claim them as his people. It was…even 5 centuries later, he still couldn’t manage to integrate both sides in his mind. 

There were the Camp Commanders who hated him for being a bastard, who treated the female worse than dirt, who hated everything different than them with a passion and would kill without thought. 

And then there were the Illyrians who only wanted to survive. There were good people between them. People like Rhys’ mother, like his mother, like the inhabitants of Rosehall…that had been treated so abhorrently and still, still trudged on and had made their own life with blood and sweat. That existed too. 

The babies that were born in warcamps never knew another way of life. He couldn’t fault them for what they did. Couldn’t…

He was Illyrian. From his temperament to his parents, the male that had supplied half for his creation…To the tips and claws of his wings and the marks on his chest and arms. To the status of Carynthian. 

Azriel was Illyrian. 

He couldn’t change that. He didn’t want to change that. 

But he would sometimes like to tear down the whole of all the warcamps with his bare hands…wanted to kill and slaughter every fucking male that had held down a female when she had her wings clipped…Wanted to protect all the children that would never learn another way of life than the cruel one. 

And still, there he was…at the bottom of Ramiel, craning his head up…because his shadows thought that he needed a hobby. And that hiking apparently was a hobby. 

That’s not the use behind hiking. You are supposed to clear your head, breathe in the scents…relax…become one with nature, the shadows told him seriously. 

He would have nearly done that…if nature hadn’t decided that he would make a perfect mid-afternoon snack. 

If all the other contestants in the Blood Rite weren’t out to kill each other…the wildlife took care of the rest. 

At least this time, Azriel had Truthteller…a single knife. That was more than he had had during the Blood Rite. 

And Truthteller always stroke true. 

Even against a Fenris. 

A Fenris, an Illyrian steppe wolf with fur the colour of pitch-black ink, long claws and razor-sharp teeth. 

Massive in size. 

He only died after his claws had destroyed Azriel’s jacket and scratched the hell out of him. 

It collapsed on top of him and Azriel cursed, climbing out from underneath that wolf, shaking out his wings and wincing when he could already feel the bruises blooming on his side. 

The Fenris’ blood was soaking the sacred ground of Ramiel, was soaking Azriel. 

He wanted to throw up. 

The feeling was visceral, shocking because he had a long time ago made his peace with that. Killing came naturally to him, like to seemingly every Illyrian. If it was a question about killing or be killed, Azriel was always going to chooose the first. His self-preservation instincts were very much intact. 

He also never had any problem with killing for food. He would only kill as much as he needed, when he needed and he did it so quickly, that the poor rabbits didn’t even have it in them to notice what was happening. 

This had been a kill for self-preservation. 

He had needed to make that kill. Otherwise, the Fenris would have killed him. 

But that wasn’t what was making him want to vomit. 

That was because of what he had just killed. 

The Fenris. 

There was a story there. 

Ancient as time. Probably the one “romantic” tale Illyrians had. If you could call killing another creature romantic. 

Azriel had never thought it to be. 

When Enalius, the greatest of Illyrian warriors had wanted to take a wife…he had killed a Fenris for her. The hide had been his wedding gift to his bride. 

In parts, the tradition still lived on.  Though it only very rarely was a Fenris hide these days. Too difficult to find. Too difficult to kill. 

And here Azriel was. With the dead body of that animal at his feet. 

Instincts took over as Azriel began to remove the hide…a bloody mess, with Truthteller soaking up the blood with its blade. 

He left the carcass for other animals to find, but he took the hide. 

He must have made quite the sight as he appeared in the nearest war camp, ignoring the screams and scattering of Illyrians, as he strode towards the tannery on the outskirts of the war camp. 

Azriel was quite sure that alone his sudden appearance, dripping with blood, was probably going to be enough to terrorise that particular war camp into behaving for the next few months... but oh well. One less headache for Cassian to deal with. 

He found that tannery with no problem, manned by some of the long-suffering Illyrian females.

The one thing he could give them was a couple of gold coins for their troubles as they took that massive black pelt to be tanned, staring at him with ill-concealed horror and…maybe something else, that he didn’t want to think too close at. 

They didn’t respect his job or that he worked for the High Lord but if he played *Who’s the better killer?* he was going to come out on top and they would respect that. 

Regardless of how much he hated it. 

I am done. No more hobbies outside, he told his shadows drily. I can’t even go on a hike without killing something. 

A few hours later, spent terrorising the camp lords with an unexpected inspection, later, he could pick up that massive black pelt…and go home to the House of Wind, get out of bloodsoaked leathers and take a shower…and probably survey the damage the Fenris had done to him. 

Namely blue and black bruised ribs and some sluggishly bleeding scratches…

He was cleaning up while sitting on the edge of the bathtub as the door was nearly ripped off his hinges. 

“Azriel!” 

“Ever heard of knocking?” he gave back with a sigh as Cassian entered the room. 

“Your bloody, ripped-apart leathers are all over your room,” his brother snapped, grasping his arm so that he could see the scratches himself. “What happened?” he demanded. 

“Don’t ask,” Azriel snorted. “Though I doubt that Carell or the entire Stonevale Camp is going to give you any troubles for the foreseeable future,” he muttered darkly.

“Is he still alive?” Cassian asked him. There was no judgement in his voice. Azriel knew that Cassian would trust him to have had a very good reason if he had killed him. 

“Not a hair on his head was harmed,” Azriel promised, reaching out for a towel with a grimace, before his shadows already grasped it and pressed it against the deepest wound on his shoulder. 

“That still doesn’t explain what happened to you,” Cassian said with a pointed look at the bruises blooming on his body. 

“I killed a Fenris,” Azriel answered truthfully. There was no reason to keep that a secret. Non whatsoever. 

Cassian was silent for a moment. 

“You killed a what ?” 

“Fenris,” Azriel repeated. “It decided that I would be a great afternoon snack.” 

“Did you go searching for it?” Cassian asked, his voice changing into something numb. Azriel just stared at him. 

“If you call searching for it, me climbing up Ramriel because apparently Hiking is a fun pastime that I should definitely try out...” he said, sarcasm bleeding from his voice. “No, Cassian, I did not go searching for it. Otherwise, I would have had more knives with me.”

Cassian stared at him for a moment. 

“Fuck.”

“Yes,” Azriel agreed. “Could you give me another towel please?” he requested and Cassian did just that, helping him to wrap it around himself as he carefully shuffled to put on new pants. He didn’t even bother with a top. He stretched his wings with a grimace, feeling them pull where he had gotten a few scratches on the thin membranes. 

“Here,” Cassian opened the bruise balm and Azriel let him smear it all over his side, hissing slightly. At least he didn’t need to do that to himself. That would suck even more. 

“Thanks,” he thanked his brother, who just shrugged. 

“You know…Rhys said you nearly bit off his head a few days ago,” Cassian said nearly conversationally.

He wanted to groan, but didn’t, instead limping from the bathing chamber to his room, where he threw a towel over the mess he had made off his floors. Cleaning that up was going to…

But then Cassian had already picked up his leathers and brought them back to the bathing chamber to at least get rid of the worst blood. 

“So let me guess, you are supposed to talk to me?” Azriel lifted his voice slightly as he sat down on the chair on his desk, staring at the hide. Now it was tanned, a process that went a little bit quicker if magic was involved. Massive, thick glossy black fur. He knew that if he wanted to sell it, he would get a small fortune for it. 

Not that he needed it. 

He had his own lines of credit. Rhys paid him very well for the job he did for him, and even if he decided that being a spymaster was no longer what he wanted to do…he wasn’t going to end up poor. 

The shadows took care of that . 

“Something like that,” Cassian agreed as he stepped out of the bathing chamber. “You’ll need to patch them,” he was informed, but Azriel just waved him off, as Cassian perched himself on the edge of his desk, staring at the fur that covered it. He reached out, looking at Azriel for permission. 

He just inclined his head. 

“I only asked Rhys to leave me alone,”  he gave back drily as Cassian touched the fur and examined it closely. 

It was pretty much perfect as far as Azriel could tell. 

“Do you want me to leave you alone?” Cassian asked him and Azriel just snorted. 

“Are you going to listen to me if I ask that of you?” he gave back with a sigh. 

“Probably not,” Cassian agreed. “So what’s going on? You know, other than you channelling bloody Enalius,” his brother teased him and something in Azriel loosened at that. 

He could have turned him away and said nothing but…he didn’t want to. 

Cassian could hear the truth…and besides it was on Rhys himself if Cassian got angry with him…and if he didn’t get angry, maybe at least then maybe Cassian would…understand. A little bit. 

“Don’t fly off the handle,” he warned Cassian, who sat up straighter. “Last Solstice, Rhys ordered me not to pursue Elain.” 

He hadn’t been sure what to expect. But the way Cassian’s face first went chalk white and then crimson with anger…that was not it. 

“He…” Cassian bit out but Azriel cut in before Cassian could do something ill thought out. Like flying straight to the River Estate and punching Rhys. 

“It’s fine ,” Azriel promised him. 

“How the fuck can you say that?!” Cassian snapped. “He…He ordered…He pulled rank on you and he…”

“It’s fine,” he repeated. “It’s over. She chose her mate. She chose Lucien. Elain is very happy. I would do nothing to put that in danger.” And he wouldn’t. “Maybe I am a fool but I don’t try to be an asshole, Cassian.” 

Cassian stared at him, broad hands still wrapped into the fur. “She chose Lucien because Rhys took you out of the equation,” Cassian said, his voice hoarse. “You don’t know if…”

“It doesn’t matter why she chose him,” Azriel cut him off. He didn’t want to hear that. He didn’t. “She chose him. And she doesn’t need to know about this.  Neither does Nesta. Or Feyre. Or Mor or Amren or anybody else,” he told Cassian pointedly. “It’s over. It’s fine. But I am really not in the mood to listen to Rhysand’s apologies .” 

“Az,“ Cassian said hoarsely. 

“It’s fine,”  he promised once again.

He was yanked into a tight hug by Cassian, broad arms enveloping him. 

“That wasn’t fair to you,” Cassian whispered. “It wasn’t fair.” Cassian’s wings trembled, like he didn’t know where to go with all of his anger and Azriel wondered if maybe he should have just stayed silent. 

“What are you going to do?” Cassian asked him as he let him go.  

“Nothing,”  Azriel answered honestly.  “I promised Rhys that I wasn’t going to kill Lucien. And in return, I requested that he was going to leave my private life alone.”

“Nothing?” Cassian repeated. 

He shrugged. 

“Maybe I’ll relieve our first century and fuck anything that has two legs and is willing,” he said, his voice quiet, staring at his hands for a moment. 

“Az,” Cassian said tightly. Azriel met his gaze. 

“I don’t have a mate, Cassian. I have no children.  It doesn’t matter to anybody but myself what I do,”  Azriel said pointedly. “If I want to…I can.” 

“Of course, you can,” Cassian agreed. “But we both know, that it won’t make you happy,” his brother pointed out. 

He was right. 

It would not. 

“Maybe it will,” Azriel disagreed with a shrug. “I never thought that I would enjoy wood carving or taking lavender salt baths either, but I do,” he said pointedly. 

“Lavender salt, really?” Cassian asked him with a snort.  

“How many hair products do you have?” Azriel shot back.  

Cassian startled. “I think you are thinking of the wrong brother,” he lobbed back quickly, before growing serious. “Why did Rhys do it?” he asked Azriel. 

“He had his political reasons,” Azriel said. “Didn’t want any more difficulties with Autumn or Day. Or a Blood Duel for that matter.” He could see it, even if he didn’t agree. 

Oh well. It didn’t matter now...not anymore. 

“I…If there is anything I can do…You tell me, alright?” Cassian asked, looking at him, so earnestly. Always so earnest. “Whatever it is…You’ll tell me.”

“I am fine, Cass. I promise,” Azriel insisted quietly. “Thank you though.” 

Cassian inclined his head and Azriel’s gaze went back to the fur on the table. “Do you want it?” he asked. 

“What?” 

“Do you want it? For Nesta?” he repeated. Nesta would like it. Probably. Maybe she would even like the story accompanying it. She could have it fashioned into some kind of outer garment or keep it draped over the bed…And if it came from Cassian, the pelt would be used for exactly what it was intended for. 

“It’s your kill, Az,” Cassian pointed out reasonably. “And we both know what it…represents.”

“Yes,” he agreed. “So, do you want it for your mate?” he asked again, Cassian still staring at him. “What else am I supposed to do with it, Cassian?” he said with a sigh. “Sell it? I would rather you have it.” 

It could just be a gift from one brother to another. 

“Keep it,” Cassian told him, his voice fierce. “You keep it.  One day you are going to need it. One day, you are going to have a cloak made out of that for your wife and the offcuts will be used for shoes for your son or daughter. And you will be happy that you hung onto it.”

It was a lovely sentiment. It was. 

But Azriel didn’t think he was ever going to have that so it didn’t matter. 

 “It’s your kill, Az. Yours. You keep it,”  Cassian repeated. “And maybe the next time you try another hobby…pick something less dangerous?” he suggested with a bright grin, going back to teasing him.

“Oh don’t worry, the shadows have a list.  We aren’t even halfway done,”  he said with a sigh. 

“What’s next on it?” Cassian wondered. 

“Knitting.”

“You know anybody that can teach you that?”

“Yes. My Ma.”