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theromanticscrooge · 21 days ago

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Introducing Your Friendly Neighborhood Langanaphyllis simnovorii (Sims 2 Cowplant)

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Venus flytraps have a 'sophisticated' snap trap system. Hair triggers, otherwise known as cilia, along the inside of the trap must be set off at least 5 times for successful trap activation. If a bug gets caught in the trap, there's a 30-second window of potential escape. If they only triggered two hairs, or they're small and fast, they're likely to be let go.

The more a bug struggles, the more hairs they brush against, and then they're locked in. This part of the trap is a failsafe. Despite their namesake, insects are more of a supplement to a flytrap's diet than a staple. Any insect they capture takes anywhere from days to weeks to fully digest. Flytraps glean the majority of their nutrients through sunlight and photosynthesis. The carnivorous diet they're famous for is a response to what nutrients they can't derive from stereotypical plant processes due to their very dry, sparse environment; beetles, ants, and spiders are their source of nitrogen and phosphorous specifically. Again, the name is deceptive. Flies are a very small, almost insignificant part of their diet!

While the reality of the plant pales in comparison to its sensationalist reputation, the flytrap and its carnivorous cousins capture someone's imagination regardless. Most plants are considered harmless and innocent; a beautiful, aesthetically pleasing part of the background. They're a highlight in poems and pretty things writers romantically draw comparisons to in hopes to impress their love interest or describe someone's beauty. They're at the bottom of the food chain. They're a readily available source of food or garnishes to meat-based dishes. Plants like the flytrap challenge the otherwise neat and tidy vision of the hierarchical food chain. A flytrap temporarily climbs up a step of this chain the second it successfully captures and digests an insect.

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The idea that flytraps are such a weird exception to what plants 'should be' are part of what have inspired a long spate of stories featuring a carnivorous plant. Arguably, the most well-known flytrap in media is Audrey II from the theatrically released 1986 musical Little Shop of Horrors. The meticulously choreographed and beautifully built Audrey animatronics are the definitive imagery for who Audrey is and what he looks like. While no one can quite recreate that level of detail, even local stage plays try to feature as dynamic and beautiful an Audrey puppet as they can recreate on a small, humble budget. My introduction to Audrey II was a high school stage play. That team managed to build and operate an Audrey II that lives rent free in my mind and sparked my own fascination with sci-fi B movie horror plants to the point they're an active staple in my own art and projects.

One of my personal favorite Audrey-inspired horror plants is the cowplant from the Sims series. Or more specifically, the cowplant's introduction in The Sims 2. Without cheats, a Sim has to reach at least level 6 in the Natural Scientist career to unlock the cowplant as a career reward. The playful flavor text for the Laganaphyllis simnovorii reads:

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This bizarre bovine vegetation is large enough to swallow your next-door neighbor whole. In fact, it WILL eat your neighbors. Your friends will be hard-pressed to resist the tantalizing vine-cake of the carnivorous Laganaphyllis Simnovorii. After it has consumed some prey, milk it for sweet, rejuvenating nectar of life. A swig of this liquid refreshment will add precious days to a Sim's life and wash away any regret they may have over their visitor's fate.

The cowplant sits adjacent to some of the goofier, more cartoonish elements of the Sims universe at large. While it isn't an explicitly playable option, superheroes and villains exist in-universe. For example, one of the seedier business deals a mayor can take in SimCity 2000 is striking a deal with a supervillain to let them build their evil lair somewhere in town for a hefty sum. In Sims 2, the top of the Law Enforcement career is 'Captain Hero.' Captain Hero flies to work and wears a skin-tight latex suit. The top of the Criminal career is Captain Hero's supervillain counterpart with the accompanying ridiculous outfit. There's also Mad Scientists with the appropriate labcoat and cybernetic hand. Mad Scientists are the classic cartoon supervillain variant with a very ambiguous tag on what kind of science they specialize in as well as an aptitude for inventing who-knows-what contraptions.

In contrast to a Mad Scientist, the Natural Science career features a specific kind of mad scientist: this Sim is interested in studying organic life and creating a large myriad of biological abominations. If there wasn't in-game hints about cow plants as a naturally occurring species that's existed for centuries, they were absolutely cross-bred and cultivated by a nutjob in this career track. When a Sim reaches the top of the Natural Science career as Ecological Guru, they cover their bits with Garden of Eden leaves and fly off for a day of dubious Captain Planet adventures. Perhaps, cowplants are restricted as a 'you worked hard' incentive for a natural scientist because they either grew it themselves or they can supposedly handle the responsibility and consequences involved with keeping one better than the general public. That said, later Sims games dropped the career climbing requirement and any average Sim can now buy one wholesale or grow one themselves. Regardless of the game mechanics, these plants exist and are readily available in some capacity.

The cowplant itself is a cow head with sharp teeth and a conspicuous pink udder dangling from its chin surrounded by a crown of leaves. The head is supported by a thin, thorny, vine-like stem that tapers down into a hilariously mundane terracotta flower pot. The base of the plant is surrounded by leaves that look similar to the trap rosettes on a Venus flytrap. A tail patterned like the cow head with a leaf on the end in place of thin hairs pokes out of the back of the pot. In a nutshell, the cowplant is a step further than just a rehash or direct satire of Audrey II. Before the cowplant, the original Sims features an ominous Venus flytrap adjacent plant. Its a decorative item with fun flavor text that Sims need to water every so often. There's also the mutant plant from The Sims Bustin' Out. According to the Wiki, a mutant plant will feed on and kill Sims if it isn't properly tended to.

In regards to the cowplant, they can be appeased with a 35 simoleon leg of lamb. They need to be fed once every 12 in-game hours to avoid deploying their vine-cake tongue. That said, a cowplant will keep its vine-cake out as long as it takes to be fed lamb or attract a Sim. When a Sim does go after the cake slice, the cowplant teases them a bit before dive-bombing the Sim, snapping the full length of its bovine head and jaws around them, and then swallowing them whole. The 'swallow' mechanics operate by cartoon logic: Somehow, the Sim liquefies, breaks down, or whatever else to fit through the ridiculously thin vine body. Within minutes, the plant has not only fully digested its victim but turned them into a life-extending milk. When another Sim milks the plant and drinks, their life is extended by 5 days followed by a disturbing memory hinting that this Sim not only enjoyed their beverage but is ready to find their next victim.

Not only is the cowplant partly inspired by Audrey II, it brings some of the moral and ethical dilemmas Seymour encountered after 'feeding the plant.' Where Audrey II was a botanist's straight-shot to fame and wealth because of his weird, exotic appearance, the cowplant is a means of attaining eternal youth and exterminating enemies with an immediate, satisfying, and horrible vengeance. Seymour had to strike deals with Audrey II and was placed at his mercy and discretion. While Seymour isn't innocent, he's contrasted against harsh circumstances and a nasty allegory about how all-consuming capitalism can be. He's a very direct horror story about what someone loses if they devote themselves and sacrifice everything to the illusion of 'the American dream.' The cowplant can be placed in a variety of storytelling roles and the resulting themes or symbolism depend on the Sims or story positioned around them.

In-game text describes the cake as 'tantalizing.' Part of this relies on Sims operating on the same kind of cartoon logic that helps conmen like Stan Pines fleece tourists with charisma and hot-glue-covered taxidermy. If Sims know that cowplants exist, there has to be some level of caution and skepticism around interacting with one. In the case of Audrey II, only Seymour is aware of Audrey's ability to speak and his man-eating tendencies for the majority of the story. He's successful because of the myth and mystery surrounding him. Its possible that cowplants are considered a myth too. Unless a Sim works in natural science, they may be more mystified and enchanted by a cowplant than scared.

Also, despite details like the sharp teeth, cowplants are cute and endearing in an unconventional way. Many players keep a plant around for the casual tail wag and the eager and almost puppy-like excitement cowplants portray at getting a treat. They're aware the plant is dangerous. Its similar to how some people react to bears, lions, or other predatory creatures in real life. In some light, they look so cute and play on the part of the brain that lights up around dogs, cats, or other critters. If there's some possibility, albeit slim, that this creature can be domesticated long enough to pet, it's worth the risk to some people. This element may be at play as much as the 'forbidden cake' element is.

The cowplant is a creature following instincts and trying to care for itself. Its not a deliberately evil and diabolical being from outer space like Audrey II. Whatever 'evil' and unethical strings are attached to the cowplant are more a byproduct of its potential owner and their ministrations.

Another interesting note about in-game mechanics is that Sims can roll the specific want to 'drink' another Sim. A player can project 'evil' intent through storytelling but this want adds a unique, fucked up level to gameplay. This Sim hates someone else so intensely that they want to contrive a situation where this specific someone gets eaten. Just as a framing device for this, one of the families featured in the soap operatic neighborhood Pleasantview are Daniel, Mary-Sue, and their twin daughters Angela and Lilith. Daniel and Mary Sue have a tepid, fracturing marriage; Daniel is cheating on his wife with the maid and Mary Sue is a workaholic that prioritizes her job over everything and everyone else. Angela is the golden child; she has straight As, she's the 'it' girl, and her parents lavish her with praise, gifts, attention, etc. Lilith is the black sheep and scapegoat. She and her sister were compared enough that they hate each other. Angela instigates fights with Lilith to blow off steam. Its acceptable for her to pick on and belittle her twin because her parents set that precedent.

Given this context, there's a chance Lilith will roll the drink Sim want for Angela. Depending on the player, they may lean towards separating the sisters to the degree they go no contact later in life or even try to have them talk things out and start making amends. If Lilith rolls this want, it cements just how deep and intense her hatred is. Its up for some interpretation, depending on how a player interprets Sim wants in general, but the implications are definitely there. Its one thing to set the cowplant as a tool in a Saturday morning cartoon villain's chase for eternal youth. There's dramatic and heartbreaking depths when a depressed and frustrated teen like Lilith seriously considers using a cowplant as a means to assuage her crappy home situation. The want description highlights the life-extending benefits of cowplant milk, but the stronger emphasis is absolutely what triggered the want. Its more about the cowplant as a nasty, specific revenge tool than the milk.

If a Sim wants eternal youth, they have two other, far more friendly options: Mortimer Goth's life-extending elixir or becoming a vampire. If a Sim has enough aspiration points and either high gold or white aspiration level, they can extend their life by 3 Sim days after drinking some. There's at least 3 portions in the convenient water cooler and there's no limit on how many a Sim can attain if their aspiration stays high. The caveat is that a Sim needs high aspiration for the most effective results. As for becoming a vampire, a Sim needs to befriend a grand vampire and be bitten. Once a Sim becomes a vampire, they live forever as long as they stay out of the sun. The other benefits are static needs while they sleep during the day and faster skill-building at night. Again, a deliberate want for the cowplant has sinister undertones because of the variety of choices a Sim has if they specifically want eternal life.

There's a layer of irony to the cowplant too. There are so many papers and explorations of The Sims as commentary on capitalism. The original game blatantly matched 50's shopping music and Americana sitcom elements with gameplay that forced an ever-increasing need for higher-value items and bigger, better, more for a happier Sim. Little Shop of Horrors sets an evil alien Venus flytrap as an allegory about the destructive, life-ruining force behind capitalism. Plugging an Audrey II adjacent entity next to a Sim presents the player with the make-their-own-Seymour-Krelbourne variant of a choose-your-own-adventure book. Will they adhere to the advice of 'don't feed the plants' or will the cowplant present a safe exploration of how much further this story can go when its a sandbox instead of a stage?

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