#silly thoughts with peyton

[wordwiilderness]

*****FOURTH WING SPOILERS*****

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Xaden did nothing wrong wtf. It pisses me off so much that he had to apologize to Violet at the end.

Like! No!

Do not apologize for keeping a secret that literally got your father and 107 other children’s parents killed AND COULD ALSO GET THOSE 107 CHILDREN THAT SURVIVED KILLED NOW!!!!!!

Having sex does not mean you deserve to know anything and everything about your partner and it definitely doesn’t mean you have to tell secrets that aren’t even yours to tell. There were literally lives at stake, so no you don’t get to me mad at a man you’ve known less than a year for keeping a secret to protect people.

Why do certain books not understand that trust takes time and it comes in increments and is given over and over again not just once for forever and it’s not something you can force at all you just have to be grateful to the people you love for giving it to you when they’re ready and sometimes you just have to accept that you can’t know everything your partner knows because not everyone everything is their’s to tell.

[pey-up]

Theyre in love ur honor

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

Don't knock it till you try it

Masterlist

Pairing: Syverson x reader x Walter Marshall (technically college AU. I needed to make the road trip scenario plausible.)

Summary: Your friends Walter and Sy have offered to drive you home for the summer, and you have decided to turn it into a nice relaxed camping trip on the way...

Word count: 9146 (yes, really...)

Warnings: SMUT, NSFW, 18+, MINORS DNI, fingering (vaginal, anal - f receiving), oral sex (f and m receiving), penetrative sex (vaginal, anal, DP - f receiving), masturbation (f), smug and dirty talking Sy, sex in a tent, hint of a size kink (blink and you miss it), silly bets, and an astonishingly solid bromance. I think that's all, but call me if I missed any.

A/N: I've finally really stopped hurting the boys and now we're just going for some nice relaxed sex in a goddamn tent, dammit! Also yeah I'm going to keep imagining the boys in college until the day I die, I don't know why (maybe because I'm young), but just... idk, read it as a memory or something? idk :')

@geralts-yenn @deandoesthingstome @ellethespaceunicorn @peaches1958 @sillyrabbit81 @peyton-warren @summersong69 @mayloma @livisss

You were not – by a long shot – the first girl to see the backseat of the beat-up chevy pickup you were sitting in. Fact. A fact so factual, in fact, that Sy hadn’t complained when you demanded he put a blanket down for you to sit on, which told you more than you really wanted to know.

Now, your eyes kept drifting shut to the sound of tires on asphalt and the bickering of soothing baritone voices in the front seat. The outside world consisted of mountain views and clear blue skies, and the fresh breeze of early summer that worked just hard enough to raise goosebumps on skin, but inside this rusty old vehicle the atmosphere was dominated by two pairs of broad shoulders, deep voices, and what you always mockingly referred to as ‘disgusting man sweat’ – always hoping neither of them would ever find out how often you dreamt of licking those salty droplets off their abs after a workout.

Both of them had shown up, first semester, in a class they didn’t have a prayer of passing, and you’d been teamed up with them because of what you then thought to be a hideous trick of fate. Somehow, you whipping them into shape for that tutorial hadn’t put them off you, and what started as whatever the educational equivalent of ‘frenemies’ is, turned into study buddies and eventually friends. The only downside to your friendship was that you chronically had to explain to your entire dorm that, no, you weren’t sleeping with either of them – let alone both of them.

As you still toed the line between asleep and awake, a heavy hand on your knee – belonging to Walter – made a decision for you in favor of consciousness.

“We’re hungry,” he said.

“You’re always hungry,” you grumbled as you reached for the bag of food and snacks on the other side of the backseat. It was a good thing they didn’t bother to deny it, because you would have strangled them both. God forbid you ever left a bag of Doritos out in your dorm. Seconds! Gone!

Sy had the stones to ask for a tuna sandwich. Absolutely the fuck not!

“I’m not opening that bag in this car, Sy.” It already smelled like stale beer and weed in there. Not in a bad way, but in a ‘you’re not allowed to smoke on campus, so this is our only option’ way. That said, adding tuna to the mix would be a complete disaster.

“Suit yourself,” he snapped. You rolled your eyes. For the love of God, it was all of ten minutes past feeding time! Walter snickered as he held out a hand. Turkey on wheat for Walter, BLT for Sy, mozzarella pesto for you. You’d splurged on groceries, because the boys had offered to take the lion’s share of the drive.

“We were thinkin’ of callin’ it a day soon, sugar.” They’d had morning classes, and you were falling asleep while on snack-duty… Plus, you’d agreed to just take it easy the whole drive. It was summer; there was no need to rush home.

Sy pulled off the highway, quickly ending the smooth, rhythmic hum of the tires on the road, until the asphalt finally made way for the crackling of gravel. Without Sy, you never would have found the campsite at which you pulled over. Camping ran through that guy’s veins, as you could tell from the impressive amount of camping gear in the bed of the pickup – all his.

Even though he helped you get out of the truck, you still lost your footing and stumbled into him, leaving Walter grinning to the side of the spectacle, commenting on your horrible clumsiness.

“Dunno,” Sy replied with a sly smile. “Guess she’s just fallin’ for me.” The cheesy joke made Walter stop dead in his tracks.

“I think that’s twenty-five,” he deadpanned, looking at you. In a less-than-sober state, somewhere in the past year, you had made a deal: if either of them managed to make that joke twenty-five times before the end of the year, you’d… Alright, let the records show that when you made that bet, you had been entirely convinced they’d never take you up on the offer to let them kiss you. But they had.

“You’re not gonna hold me to what I said back then, are you?” you asked in a small voice, your cheeks so hot you could probably fry an egg on them. The door of the truck slammed shut behind you, and Sy slowly stepped forward, forcing you to step back, until you were backed up against the truck, with him leaning over you – completely caged in between his solid body and the car.

“Deal’s a deal, sugar.” There was no trace of his usual grin, no hint of the mischievous glint in his eyes that normally told you he was kidding. He just came closer and closer as your eyes went wide – Walter did nothing. Jackass.

Not that kissing Sy was something you didn’t want. Oh no! In fact, it was something a fairly large part of you wanted so badly you thought you might burst. On some days, being close to either of them – let alone both – was torture, where your heart raced every time they came near you, and you unconsciously held your breath when they touched you… And while the guys just freely admitted to having sex dreams about you, you kept the little nugget of truth that you had similar dreams about them, tightly under wraps. Not because you thought they’d tease you about it, or anything, just… No, wait, actually that’s exactly why you didn’t tell them.

A few more seconds passed in which your heart tried its best to jump out of your chest.

“This isn’t funny, Sy,” you snapped on a sharp exhale when his mouth curled at the corners into that signature smirk you loved to hate. Finally able to gather your thoughts as well as your strength, you put your hands on his chest and pushed. It was a good thing he let you go, because if he had decided to stay put, you wouldn’t have stood a chance in hell.

“I want my kiss, sugar,” he called after you as you paced away to… alright, you didn’t actually know where you were going, but away, at least. “One way or another.”

As pissed – or confused – as you were, this was ‘the outdoors’ and therefore absolutely not the type of environment you were well equipped for in any kind of way, thus you decided it was best to stay close – within earshot, at least – to the boys. But they could take care of unpacking and pitching tents and whatever the fuck else needed doing.

“Hey.” Sy sat down next to you on the rock you had claimed, and put an arm around you. This was oddly comfortable, especially compared to the tense situation by the car, earlier. “I was messin’ with ya back there, you know that, right?” Whether it was to make a point, or simply because Walter wasn’t watching – or maybe because the threatening wall of man from before was now your familiar gentle giant again, you had no idea, but you impulsively reached for Sy and kissed him on the cheek. A low chuckle escaped him, and he pulled you closer.

“There’s a trail up to a waterfall we maybe wanted to check out, you in? Easy hike.” The good thing about hanging out with the guys was that they really considered your level of… adventurous ineptitude. If they suggested this hike, it meant they were at least medium convinced you could actually make it there and back in one piece – or that they could make it at least halfway with you on their backs.

The hike led up to a beautiful, clear river, and a spectacular waterfall. Between the smell of the woods, the sun comfortably warm on your skin, and the phenomenal view, this hike had been more than worth it – never mind that you were all sticky and sweaty from trying to keep up with the guys and their superhuman pace.

“On the way back, can we please remember that I have little legs?” you complained as you sank down onto the rock at the river bank the boys had selected to eat yet another sandwich on. Sy hummed, finally contently munching on the tuna sandwich you’d denied him in the car, and Walter laughed. You sat in silence while your friends ate their food, which meant the rock inevitably became too boring for your limited attention span.

What started off as a relatively sure-footed expedition over the rocks that stuck out of the water, inevitably ended with your very accurate portrayal of a soaking wet person regretting most – if not all – of their life choices. Sy sighed and rolled his eyes as he swallowed the last bite of his sandwich, taking his sweet time to get up and make his way over to you to fish you out of the water – which he then called ‘refreshing’ instead of ‘freezing fucking cold’. That didn’t improve your mood. Next, Walter had to dive for your phone – which, luckily, could swim, but was still going to be next to useless to you at the bottom of this far-deeper-than-anticipated vein of icy death.

Shivering, covered in goosebumps and with chattering teeth, you stood on the bank of the river.

“Take your shirt off,” Walter commanded, plucking his own off the dry rock.

“What?” you stammered, staring at him in disbelief. Now, that alone would have been just fine, if your eyes hadn’t dropped from his face to his chest. Small droplets of water dripped from his hair and beard onto his shoulders and chest and… somehow trickled down his body in slow motion. If they knew how much willpower it took to lift your eyes to his again, they would never let you live it down. Sy repeated his words from a distance – there went your excuse that Walter had just been talking too softly. Sy was still up to his knees in the river, unbothered by the cold, just hanging out there as if that water didn’t rival the fucking arctic ocean for temperature.

As you looked at him, he started to walk back to the riverside. The sun was starting to set, changing the light in a way that made it look like Sy, much like those fucking drops of water, was moving in slow motion, flecks of sunlight dancing over his skin… These guys were distracting enough when they were dry and dressed, but now that they were wet and half naked, with damp, coarse curls sticking to their chest and abs, catching the water that dripped down from their heads… These boys were fucking with your head. Big time.

“Sugar, take off your shirt, please,” Sy repeated when he stood next to you. “You’re freezin’, let’s get you a dry t-shirt, at least.” Oh. So, they weren’t putting the moves on you. Good to know. Hopefully, your exasperated sigh didn’t give away any of the disappointment you felt. With a little help from Walter, you lifted your soaking top over your head, not caring that they saw you in your bra until it was already too late. Sy used his t-shirt to dry you off a bit, before handing you Walter’s to put on. The whole time, they kept their eyes in decent places, and their hands didn’t wander anywhere they shouldn’t. Now, why did that make you feel sad?

“We should head back,” Walter said – mostly to Sy. The sun disappeared rather quickly, and without the heat from it, that dry t-shirt – save for the two tit-shaped wet spots where your soaked bra touched it – didn’t do much to keep you warm.

By the time you made it back to the campsite, you were shivering again. The walk had done next to nothing to warm you, and your still wet jean shorts chafed painfully against your thighs. Not to mention your thighs were starting to chafe painfully against your thighs. So, the first thing you did was disappear into the tiny single tent that was meant for you – as you had made it abundantly clear that sharing a tent with the boys was out of the question – and change into something dry, warm, and comfortable. The guys did the same, although – as it turns out – their version of ‘warm’ included no shirts. Did they ever get cold?

It was tough enough to keep your eyes off Sy in cargo shorts – although Walter in jeans was just as much of a sight for sore eyes – but now that it was getting dark, the sweats came out to play. You silently thanked Walter for his choice of black sweatpants, because keeping your thoughts out of the gutter was hard enough already. Sy was shamelessly sporting a pair of grey sweats, filling them out just about as nicely as humanly possible as he sat there, getting a fire started. The sly glances and that godforsaken smirk he flung your way from time to time told you that he was more than aware that you were checking him out.

The heat from the fire alone wasn’t enough to warm you up. Sy’s solution was tequila – which helped, but not quite enough, so Walter wrapped you in a blanket, pulling you close to his side as he ran his hands over your arms in an attempt to stop your shivering. At the same time, Sy inched closer, and before you knew it, four arms were wrapped around you.

Apart from being hot, proverbially, these guys were hot in the literal sense, too, warming you up slightly more effectively than the blanket around your shoulders and moderate amount of alcohol in your system. Still, the icy temperatures from the ground you were sitting on seeped into you without mercy. Of course, the boys took notice, both getting the same idea, and each grabbing one of your legs to try and pull you into their respective laps. Needless to say; it didn’t work, and you just ended up with spread legs, sitting between them on the floor. Sy had that twinkle in his eye, that smirk on his face that was dripping with confidence and indecency… You had to get out of there before he could speak!

As you scrambled to your feet, mumbling something about getting another blanket for yourself to sit on, you tripped and fell into Walter’s lap. Of course! You had been keeping score on that bet as well, and you knew you had come here – fucking camping – with both of the guys stuck on twenty-four counts of the same lame fucking joke… This was your fault, really.

To your surprise, however, Walter said nothing – instead, he smiled politely, pulling you into a more comfortable position in his lap.

“You’ve earned it,” you whispered, although you had absolutely no idea why. Maybe because it was the truth, maybe because you just wanted this bet to be over. Either way, it hurt you that he didn’t make the dumb joke, and asked to collect his reward the way Sy had. Hoping to get up before Walter looked into your eyes – where your thoughts were no doubt displayed for everyone to see – you made a move that was entirely too advanced for your mediocre balance and agility, and you crashed down again, this time falling harder than before. As Walter grunted, panic shot through you…

“Darling, I’d ask you if it hurt when you fell from heaven, but so far the only person who got hurt in that process, is me,” he blurted out in a strangled voice, while Sy was losing it next to you, howling from laughter.

Was it the booze? The fire? The tension from this afternoon? The fact that you were sitting in his lap, with his hands maybe a tad too low on your hips, but high enough to not rouse suspicion? Or maybe just your complete lack of self-control? Whatever it was, it caused you to move to straddle his thighs, and without thinking about it for so much as a second, you kissed him. If you’d had a sliver of hope before that Walter would break the kiss after an at least semi-decent amount of time, it was gone now, because the hand on your hip pulled you tighter against him, and his other hand tangled in your hair.

Walter kissed you. It took far more effort than you had ever expected to really let that sink in, but at the same time there was no way around it. He was kissing you, and it was eager, and rough, accompanied by ragged breaths and the occasional moan. It managed to make you forget everything around you. Everything except for Sy – mainly because he let out a pained grunt just as you were about to stick your tongue down Walter’s throat.

“I got a kiss on the cheek, man,” he groaned as he leaned in slightly on one elbow.

Now, if you had been thinking clearly, you would have laughed it off, gotten up and gone to bed. Safe to say, you were not thinking clearly.

Sy’s mouth felt just as good on yours as Walter’s had, with similarly soft lips, a similarly coarse beard scraping your skin, and a similar roughness to him that only wound you tighter. You moaned, your hips unconsciously grinding into Walter’s, his growing hard-on providing extra friction to soothe the ache between your legs. When you briefly opened your eyes to see if Sy was as involved in this as you were, you saw him palm his own erection through his sweats – casually adjusting its position before focusing on you again. In that moment – timed perfectly with a moan from Walter – something inside of you snapped.

“I’m going to bed,” you stuttered as you broke the kiss with Sy, at the same time scrambling to get to your feet – this time succeeding without falling into anyone, and making it to your own tent without a hitch. ‘

Now, if it had been a sober conversation, and it hadn’t been in the middle of nowhere without a sound to be heard for miles other than crickets, the occasional owl, and the crackling of the fire, at least half of it would have been inaudible from where you had pitched your tents. But the boys were too drunk, and their voices too deep and dark – the sound just traveled too far. You could have ignored them. You could have turned around, pulled your sleeping bag over your ears, and pretended to be asleep until it became the truth. Instead, you listened, sometimes straining to understand what they were saying.

“So, who do we say got her first?”

“I’m asking for a do-over.”

“Because it was me?”

“We could just… Y’know…”

“Think she’d go for it?”

“What, both of us? My ex did…”

“But she was nuts.”

“Hey! Okay, fair enough.”

Both of them? Both of them? As in… Separately? Or… Oh, what the fuck did it matter! The answer was yes.

What surprised you most about your thoughts was how completely unsurprised you were by them. Somehow, the idea of sleeping with both Sy and Walter felt as natural as could be, and left you not only stumped, but with another problem that needed tending to…

Without thinking, you slid your hand down your body, and into your sweatpants. Kissing the boys had definitely had its effect on you, you had known that as soon as it had happened, but the extent of the mess between your thighs was still quite surprising. Somehow, tasting both of them, followed by your eavesdropping, had made you dripping wet and craving something more than just your fingers. Unfortunately, they’d have to do.

You thought of that first kiss with Walter, then the one with Sy, then wondered what it would feel like to have those beards scratch the skin of your neck, slowly making their way down to your chest. Would they lick? Bite? Moan? You pictured Sy, eagerly making his way further down, while Walter kept his attention on your chest. Would he be as quiet as he always was? Was Sy as loud as you imagined him to be?

There were so many things to wonder about, besides the obvious size question, that the thoughts consumed you completely as you worked yourself up to your peak. So completely, in fact, that you didn’t hear the guys return to the tents – just as you squealed from pleasure while you came. Hard.

“Fuck, sugar,” Sy said from outside. Walter warned him to stop talking, but he didn’t listen. “Tell me if you want any help.”

It was tempting to say ‘yes’. It was tempting to crawl into that tent and tell them you had heard everything they said by the fire. It was tempting to offer yourself up on a silver platter, hoping they’d make good on their promises from before by fucking the life out of you. But things that are tempting can also still be difficult, so you did nothing. Well, nothing… If ‘dying of embarrassment’ counts as ‘something’, you were definitely not doing nothing.

The sound of your own teeth chattering prevented you from falling asleep, even though you could hardly keep your eyes open. And who knew goosebumps could hurt like this? The boys had warned you beforehand that it would get cold at night, and you’d even told Sy what you had planned on wearing as pajamas, and he’d said you’d be good. Well, you weren’t good. You were covered from head to toe, and you were not – by any definition of the word – ‘good’.

As hard and painful as it was to just lay there and freeze, it was harder to get up, worm your double-socked feet into your sneakers and get out of your tent. Outside, it was pitch black, and the dim light of your phone was barely enough to prevent you from falling flat on your face. You had to credit the boys with their incredible foresight to keep the path from your tent to theirs free of tripping hazards – something you were so delighted in at that moment that you forgot to question whether or not there was some sort of ploy, or whatever in place. Lewd scheme or not, you were glad to make it without a hitch.

“Eh, guys?” you whispered after zipping open the tent and poking your head in.

“Hm? What?” It was Walter – and from Sy’s continued snoring, you deduced that you shouldn’t wait for him to answer; he wasn’t waking up.

“I’m really fucking cold,” you admitted reluctantly. That seemed to wake Walter up a little more…

“Cold? You could go on an expedition to the north pole dressed the way you are!” The sleep-drunk slur of his voice was… adorable, in a way. To his left – no, his right… To his left from where you were standing? The left side of the air-mattress they were on when you looked at it, standing at the foot of the bed, the right side if you were actually lying in… oh for fuck’s sake! Next to him, Sy groaned and turned – although you couldn’t see any of that, because it was very dark.

“The fuck is going on?” he grunted, his voice gravelly and dark – which did a good job of making your knees weak.

“She’s cold,” Walter replied dryly.

“There’s no way,” Sy said in disbelief, “she’s dressed for winter in Alaska.”

“If you two are done mocking me, I’m actually freezing my ass off out here. Do you have an extra blanket or something?” you snapped.

“Sugar, we’re not even wearin’ shirts,” Sy said, his voice steadier now that he was waking up.

“Great, so you put on a shirt, and I’ll take your sleeping bag.” It was a shame they couldn’t see you roll your eyes, but the snippy tone would surely get your point across.

“Or you could just come here, love,” Walter said all of a sudden. There was rustling in the tent and then a dim red light over your heads turned on.

“Interesting choice…” you started, but Walter and Sy chuckled.

“It’s easier on your eyes, sugar.” Shit, Sy was easy on your eyes, god damn. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said he wasn’t wearing a shirt, and the way he casually lounged on that fucking mattress right now, with that arm behind his head, eyes half shut…

Walter was sitting up, holding a hand out to you, waiting patiently until you had zipped open the door further – which took so long that he ended up helping you with it. As you got in, he got out, and for a moment you were scared he would offer to leave you with Sy while he took your tent, but after a while he returned holding your backpack and sleeping bag.

The bed was a bit small for the three of you, especially since the guys were so bulky, but you managed to make it work. The only thing was… shivering in between them was hardly more comfortable than shivering by yourself, and now there wasn’t enough space to curl up into a ball and hope for the best.

“Sugar, stop squirmin’, c’mere.” Sy’s strong arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you close, when up until now you’d been trying desperately not to touch either of them. “Alright, I take it back, she is freezin’.” A gesture to Walter you could feel but not see, made him scooch over, too, until his body was flush against yours.

Your heart raced in your throat when warm hands slipped underneath your hoodie, stroking your side and – eventually – your stomach. Somewhere down the line, you forgot how to breathe properly, taking in shallow breaths, hoping the guys wouldn’t notice. Of course, they did, because they were inches away from you.

“You should take this off, sugar,” Sy mumbled into your ear. Every muscle in your body tensed up at the suggestion, and it felt like the air was knocked out of your lungs.

“C-can’t,” you stammered, “I’m not… eh… I’m not wearing a bra.”

“Fairly sure we’ve seen a pair of tits before, love,” Walter replied, right at the time Sy muttered ‘neither are we’, making you laugh. Somehow, all of this seemed innocent – or rather; you were convincing yourself it felt innocent, and any subtext and undertones were a figment of your imagination, instead, when in fact, it was far more likely that it was exactly the other way around…

“Not mine,” you protested, biting your lip as a third hand, belonging to Walter, began to roam your back.

“We’re aware of that,” Sy said, his voice dangerously close to your ear. His breath was hot against your cold skin – a sensation that made you shiver.

“In fact, we try not to think about it. It makes us sad,” Walter said, leaning his forehead against yours, sliding his hand down your back and then up your side until his thumb was less than an inch away from the underside of your boobs.

For a moment, the thought that this was just a tactic to actually warm you up flashed through your head, because – in all fairness – it was working. Every part of you was suddenly glowing, breath quick and ragged in anticipation of whatever it was that would come next. What surprised you, though, was how calm they both seemed. Then again, they had already – unknowingly – admitted to having done this before. If that was where this was headed, which you still didn’t quite know for sure… It was as if the guys were both waiting for something. Waiting for… you.

Your lips trembled as you tilted your head up, Walter taking your hint and pressing his lips to yours. Sy pushed your hair out of the way and latched on to your neck. Neither of them went straight to groping you – not more than they had been up until now – but it was only a matter of time before you felt Walter’s hand creep up to your chest. He broke your kiss, his eyes silently asking for permission, which you gave him with the flash of a smile and a slight nod, gasping when his fingers brushed past your nipple. Despite the rising temperatures in the tent – even though most of that was likely just your imagination – the difference between your skin and Walter’s was striking, and you moaned when his warm hand cupped your breast.

Sy was less subtle by about a million degrees, boldly grabbing as much of your other boob as humanly possible – and he had big hands, so you quickly ran out of tit for him to dig his fingers into.

“Can you take it easy,” you blurted out as you laughed in surprise at his – as far as you were concerned – unwarranted enthusiasm.

“Darlin’, I’ve been dreamin’ of these tits for weeks, throw a man a bone.” He groaned when you backed a hip into him the same way you would have if he had been standing next to you.

“Looks like you’re the one throwing me a bone, Syverson,” you teased when you felt his cock push against your ass. It was a horrible joke; Walter laughed, Sy did not – possibly because he was the one on the receiving end of your mockery. Instead, you heard a low, arrogant chuckle in your ear, that told you exactly how he wasn’t going to give you the upper hand.

“I ain’t throwin’ you nothin’, sugar,” he growled, putting a hand on your hip, gripping you tight. “I’m gonna make you fuckin’ beg for it.”

“Promises, promises.” Teasing the boys was fun when you were studying, because you very clearly had a head start in that department, and they would get frustrated, and it was very cute. But now, sandwiched between their bodies, gone was your head start. Any advantage you had over them, in any other way, was useless here. The worst part? They fucking knew it. It was as if they grew bigger and you got smaller, and you were loving every second of it.

Suddenly, the hands underneath your sweater grew impatient, tugging the fabric up until there was no point in keeping it on. Rough hands turned you on your back, which left you staring up at both guys while they raked their eyes over your naked upper body. The knowledge that they were far from unaffected by you graced you with a sense of pride that helped keep doubts and shyness away as you reveled in their attention and the appreciative grunts and moans they let out as they looked at you.

“Fuck,” Walter muttered, licking his lips, completely focused on your bare skin. He scooched closer to you, grinding his hips into your side as he did, and turned your face to his to kiss you.

It was as eager as before, this time with Sy descending, pressing his lips to your neck, exceeding every expectation you had created in your fantasy from before; their lips were softer, their tongues wetter, and the way the coarse hair felt on your skin better than anything you could ever imagine. You whined and squirmed as their hands glided over your body, paying plenty of attention to your boobs, their fingers treating the soft flesh in remarkably similar ways. After a while, they switched places; Sy kissed you, Walter explored your body, making you gasp into Sy’s mouth as he wrapped his lips around your nipple, sucking gently on the hardened little bud while his fingers worked the other.

Eventually, he came back up to kiss you, a situation Sy took advantage of by diving straight back between your boobs, this time sliding his hand down your stomach and into your sweatpants – which is when you grabbed his wrist.

“Stop.” Stern and very effective – not that you were about to give the boys any credit for not assaulting you; that sounded like common fucking decency to you, actually. “Before this goes any further; did either of you, with your infinite wisdom and incredible foresight, pack condoms? Because if not…” Before you finished that sentence, both of them sat up and reached for their bag, leaving you there, taken aback by… You didn’t actually know what had you so shocked about this.

Sy made it back to your side first, tucking a handful of condoms beneath his pillow before laying down again. “Oral?” he asked. It was only half the question, but you understood perfectly. You quickly established that everyone was clean, making the short answer to his half-question ‘without’. Sy responded to that agreement by promptly sliding his hand into your pants, not wasting any more time. His fingers slipped between your folds, and he let out a low chuckle.

“For a moment I was worried you didn’t want this as much as we do,” he growled in your ear. “Guess I was wrong.” One quick, skilled swirl of his finger around your swollen clit made you whine – a sound he clearly found very motivational, because his fingers picked up a steady rhythm. You tried to hide your face in Walter’s neck to cover up the sound of your moans, but he caught you and kissed you instead.

Sy somehow found the time to kiss your neck, your jaw, your ear – sinking his teeth into you ever so slightly, stopping just before he hurt you – while he continued what he was doing. His fingers were absolute magic, making you swear under your breath as he effortlessly slipped two of them inside you. Next, he kissed his way down again, not stopping at your breasts, but continuing over your abs, until he reached your sweatpants, pulling them down eagerly without waiting for your permission. Of course, he had it – and you’d had plenty of time to stop him while he was headed there. It’s just that… That was about the very last thing you wanted.

Next to you, Walter kept busy pressing lazy kisses to your neck and jaw, occasionally pulling away to look at you, while he held you and played with your boobs. A few times you tried to move your hand to the bulge in his sweatpants, but he stopped you every time.

“Would you just...”

“Darling, been there, done that. You’ll be useless to me within seconds.” He nodded towards Sy, who was taking a moment to find a decent position between your legs. You raised your eyebrow at Walter, questioning his words, but he didn’t budge. “I’m gonna wait my turn, love.”

“I know this one,” Sy said, running his fingers over the fabric of your thong. You chuckled – he was right; he’d barged into your room one night while you were changing into whatever you were going to wear out to the club, and he’d seen you in your underwear. This underwear. He took his sweet time taking it off, teasing you with kisses on the inside of your thighs, his beard rough against your sensitive skin, until you were almost begging him to keep going. Finally, he pulled your panties down.

“You were right,” he said to Walter, leaving you to wonder what the fuck… “It is her natural hair color.” Oh. You fought the urge to kick Sy – instead, you lightly squeezed your thighs shut around his head. It didn’t seem to bother him. Quite the opposite, in fact.  

The urge disappeared altogether when you – finally – felt his tongue on your pussy. He wasn’t subtle, but damn, he was good. Walter had absolutely had a point; barely ten seconds in and you couldn’t keep your eyes open, let alone focus on anything other than the feeling of Sy’s tongue on your clit. He impatiently spread your legs further while mumbling some very dirty things about how much he wanted to taste you. Involuntarily, you chuckled – causing both guys to stop what they were doing and looking at you in suspicion. Lying was pointless; they knew you well enough by now to effortlessly see through that, and you sighed.

“I… eh…” you stammered, unable to find the words.

“Come on,” Walter said, “if you’ve still got things to hide from us now…” He was right, of course, this wasn’t a position you’d have found yourself in at all if you hadn’t been so comfortable with – and hot for – these guys. Then again, you were already exposed and vulnerable… Why make that worse?

You hid your face in Walter’s neck as you just said what was on your mind without thinking about it: “I always imagined you to be the quiet one and Sy the loud one.”

��Always?” Sy teased you. His usual cocky attitude transferred seemly to the bedroom – or… tent – as it would seem. Except now, for once, you had a decent shot at shutting him the fuck up – although you did have a feeling you were going to like his smug confidence for a change. Sy had been growing out his buzzcut for a few weeks now, which made his hair just about long enough to grab – a fact you used to your advantage when you tangled your fingers in his hair and pulled his face back to where you wanted it.

“That’s just going to make it harder to answer the question, darling,” Walter muttered next to you while drawing circles around your nipples with impatient fingers.

“Fuck!” you shrieked as Sy’s tongue hit your clit just right – a note he took to heart, because he didn’t leave that spot again, leaving you wishing that all men were that smart. Because why – for the love of God – did they always change their approach as soon as they found a spot you let them know you really liked? Right… The question at hand… “You really thought it was just the two of you dreaming about me?” They had to be smart enough to figure out what you meant on their own, right? The flustered look on Walter’s face told you enough, as did the deep chuckle and gentle bite on the inside of your thigh.

Apparently fed up with your conversation, Sy doubled down on his efforts, eating you out like a man starved, more chuckles escaping him as he watched you pull his pillow over your face in an attempt to keep quiet. ‘Attempt’ because you still failed quite horribly when he pushed two fingers into your pussy and curled them, finding your g-spot without any effort. The orgasm that followed was the kind of toe-curling, earth-shattering, life-changing thing that made you really mad at yourself for one particular reason…

“Jesus fucking Christ, I should have taken you up on your offer when my useless ex broke up with me,” you moaned as Sy made his way up again, pulling in the pillow that you had haphazardly thrown aside – after you were done screaming­, that is – so you could catch your breath. Sy immediately pulled you on top of him, kissing you hard and deep, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue. It was something that had always made you feel weird and – if you were being perfectly honest – mildly disgusted when it had been your ex doing it, but there was something about the way Sy had gone down on you, and the way he was kissing you now, something unapologetic, passionate, and enthusiastic, that made you want to kiss him.

In fact, you were just about to commit to the bit when someone – and that someone had to be Walter – grabbed you by your hips and dragged you back until you were on your knees. You tried to lie down again as you heard him rummage around, looking for something – the obvious, really. The smack on your ass made you shriek in surprise, only making you slightly worried that either sound would have been audible well outside the tent.

“Stay there,” Walter’s husky voice commanded. “My turn.” Maybe he was the quiet one, but when he did speak… Oh my! You didn’t dare to move a muscle, leaving you sitting there, exposed as you heard the pretty familiar crinkling of foil. Shortly after, you felt the tip of Walter’s cock glide along the length of your slit. He teased you for a moment before lining himself up and slowly pushing into you. Sy laughed as your eyes went wide, and he grabbed your hand, guiding it to the bulge in his pants. Jackass. As soon as you got a good sense of what he was equipped with, you squealed. Not with any particular emotion in mind, just… Right now, you didn’t know what to think. In fact, Walter was well on his way to at least semi-permanently turning the whole thinking-function of your brain off.

“You alright, love?” Walter asked as he slowly pushed further into you.

“So far so good,” you moaned, “but I hope you’re running out of dick, because I’m running out of places to put it.” Cue roaring laughter from both guys…

“If you ever wonder why we love you,” Sy said, his sentence interrupted by more laughter, “that, right there. That’s why.”

You wanted to respond to that, you really did, but Walter pulling out of you already left you breathless, meaning all you could do was gasp when he slammed back into you. You’d never pictured either of them to be gentle. Concerned for your comfort, sure, but not tender. You’d been right. Luckily, gentle lovemaking was very low on your list of priorities in this particular situation – or ever – which meant you reveled in the brutish attention you got and soon found yourself wanting to beg Walter to fuck you harder.

Sy, as vocal as he’d been before, turned out to also be a champion in impatiently nudging your hand, vaguely suggesting he wanted you to do something, and for a moment it felt like you were about to regain some control of the situation, but no… He was also not above manhandling you into a position where your face hovered over his crotch, and taking his dick out himself once he got really fed up with your stalling. With your eyes wide, you looked at him – something he enjoyed for a moment before tapping the tip of his cock to your lips.

“Don’t make me ask, Sugar,” he growled. As much as you wanted to protest and act out, with Walter fucking the attitude out of you, there was nothing you could do but open your mouth and carefully wrapping your lips around him. The chuckle you let out as Sy grunted appreciatively when you swirled your tongue around his cock was interrupted by your own moan when Walter did… whatever it was that he did to cause it.

Slowly but surely, you made your way further down Sy’s dick, until a particularly violent thrust from Walter threw you off, accidentally forcing Sy deeper than you could handle. Choking and sputtering, you moved away from Sy, only scared for a moment that he’d be disappointed, but he had a different reaction – similar to Walter’s: checking to see if you were okay. Again, you were not in the habit of handing out bonus points for normal behavior, but it was nice, regardless.

“I’m fine,” you said between ragged breaths. “Note to self: deepthroating while getting railed from behind; bad idea.” The guys laughed, and as soon as you’d caught your breath, you joined them.

“There’s one way we all get attention without any risk of choking,” Sy mentioned casually, wiggling an eyebrow suggestively. Yes, you knew what he meant instantly, but… both of them? At the same time? All it took to convince you to at least give it a try was Walter slipping out of you, leaving you empty and nowhere near sated. One of Sy’s sly glances was a question to Walter, who ‘hmmph’-ed. You didn’t like the sound of that, per se, and looked over your shoulder to see what he was on about.

“Definitely depends,” he said, taking your lack of an immediate ‘absolutely the fuck not’-reaction as a sign you were considering it. And he was correct in that interpretation of the situation. “There’s a time and place for first time anal, and this is not it.” That was a sentiment you could absolutely get behind. Luckily, it didn’t matter, because it was hardly applicable. You assured the guys you had plenty of experience in that area.

Another potential spanner in the works that Sy mentioned, was the lack of lube. Somehow, Walter surprised you by mentioning you should have some with you – you did, but how did he know that?

“You use it to keep your hair from going frizzy,” he deadpanned. You looked at him as if you’d seen a ghost, while Sy looked at you as if you’d gone completely nuts.

“What?” you said, turning to Sy again. “It works!” With one hand, you reached for the strap of your backpack, pulling it towards you so you could look for the bottle. It was just under half full, but that should be enough…

Walter wasn’t stingy with the stuff, which was a good thing. There were few things more annoying to you than continuously having to tell a guy to use more lube. One, then two, then three fingers disappeared into you without a hitch, and although the fourth was a nice reminder that you had to relax, that went over without too much trouble as well. Somehow, somewhere in your mind, the fact that Walter seemed to know exactly what he was doing irked you – it was completely hypocritical of you, for obvious reasons, but right now the thought of him with anyone else made you mad.

The boys laughed when you voiced the absurd thought, and Sy didn’t neglect to point out that they hadn’t been too happy about several of the ‘scum’ (yes, really) you’d gotten together with in the time they’d known you. It was a weird thing to be joking about with two of your closest friends while one of them had several fingers stuck up your ass, but at the same time it felt very natural and on-brand for your relationship with the guys.

You whined when Walter pulled his fingers out, making Sy chuckle in a way you didn’t like at all.

“Maybe we should go to sleep,” he suggested with a smug grin on his face that only widened when you told him you were definitely not going to do that. “Why not, sugar?”

Fuck, he was making good on that promise from before. Now, of course, you could convince yourself that begging for cock was beneath you, and you weren’t going to do it, but that would leave you – relatively – unfucked, which was… not desirable, to say the least. Or you could admit to yourself and them how much you wanted both of them inside of you, and have a great time.

Somehow, the red light that no one had bothered to turn off – luckily, as everything you had been doing so far would have been more or less impossible in the dark – already made the tent feel like… a brothel, quite frankly, you put your doubts aside and looked at Sy.

“We’re not going to sleep, because you’re not done fucking me,” you said, giving him your best bedroom eyes. Sy seemed impressed at first, but his eyes flitted to Walter and…

A strong hand grabbed your shoulder and pulled you up until your back hit Walter’s chest. His arm reached around, grabbing you by your throat – lightly, almost as if to ask for permission, but demanding.

“What do you want?” he asked, his voice dark and gravelly. Down on the air mattress, Sy smirked up at you, making it painfully obvious that you wouldn’t get out of this, no matter how hard you tried. You quickly scanned your brain for all your options, sadly coming up completely empty. No matter which way you sliced it, they were going to come out on top.

“I want you to fuck me,” you snapped, “both of you.” A sarcastic chuckle behind you and Sy shaking his head as he looked up at you told you that that wasn’t good enough. After a deep breath, your voice softened as you spoke again, finally saying the word they wanted to hear: “Please.”

For a long, dull moment all you really heard was the sound of two more condoms being unwrapped, and the top of the bottle of lube clicking. Then, Sy pulled you towards him. As soon as you felt his tip at your entrance, you sat down, fighting the urge to slap him when he threw a smirk and that godforsaken horrible wink your way. Under normal circumstances you considered yourself very well versed in resisting that desire, but today… He laughed when your palm landed lightly on his cheek and thrust up into you for good measure, making you squeal and fall over. Luckily, he caught you just in time.

Just as you wanted to sit up again, Walter put a hand on your back. Right. In that little moment of silliness, you’d almost forgotten what the endgame was, but now that you felt Walter’s cock pushing against your ass…

“Keep talking to us, okay?” Sy whispered softly as he saw your expression change. He cupped your cheek, gently stroking your cheekbone with his thumb. “Breathe.” You took his advice immediately – no doubt a nice change of pace for him, as he was used to your stubbornness at this point – taking a few deep breaths. It wasn’t until the third or fourth one that Walter moved, slowly pushing into you. Keeping your eyes open was absolutely impossible, the sensation of both of them filling you up at the same time too much to even really wrap your head around. “Sugar, you okay?”

“Uhuh.” You nodded, showcasing your current full extent of your ability to answer. When Walter moved, you swore under your breath – when they both moved you hid your face in Sy’s neck and let out a loud moan, followed by an out-of-breath ‘fuck yes’, and that was all the confirmation they needed.

They established a rhythm suspiciously quickly, pumping in and out of you in sync. Yeah. They’d definitely done this before. As you pushed the thought away and focused on the incredible sensations of their cocks moving inside of you, their eager – and mostly greedy – hands on your hips, shoulders, ass, thighs, and tits, you felt a familiar pressure inside of you.

“Don’t stop,” you blurted out – and the boys seemed more than happy to oblige. With one little disclaimer…

“Make it quick, love… Not gonna last,” Walter grunted, digging his fingers into the flesh of your hips. It hurt, causing you to swat at his hand, which made him relax his grip a bit. Judging from Sy’s rapid breaths and a concentrated look on his face that gave away just how much difficulty he was having with keeping his rhythm steady, he was getting pretty damn close, too. In fact, pretty much the second their thrusts dragged you over the edge, both of them grit their teeth and gave in to their own pleasure, growling profanities as they came.

The boys were nice enough to handle most of the cleanup for you – which was, given that you were camping, largely a matter of wet wipes, which was definitely not even close to the shower you would have loved to take right about now. And you couldn’t really appreciate Sy’s joke about a lovely, refreshing river near where you were, either.

“Maybe tomorrow,” you yawned, turning around in the middle of the bed, wrapping your sleeping bag tightly around your shoulders. It didn’t take the guys long to join you, and soon you were sandwiched between them again, strong arms wrapped around you – clearly not planning on letting go anytime soon.

Walter pressed his lips to your shoulder and let out a low chuckle. “Still cold, darling?”

The next morning, you woke up in an empty bed, in a tent that was already slightly warmer than comfortable, with just your sleeping bag on it. The guys had somehow already managed to worm theirs into the tiny little bags they came in, and all without waking you. Then again, it was safe to say that by now they’d proven themselves to be experts in the field of putting pretty big things in relatively tiny places…

For a moment, you wondered if you should feel weird about getting up and going outside, seeing the guys, but something about the whole thing felt so oddly natural that you didn’t give it a second thought.

“Mornin’, sugar,” Sy said as he held out some coffee to you when you joined him on the ground by the fire, where you’d spent the start of last night, as well. The two of you called Walter over, who was just about done putting your tent – the one that had been meant to be yours, anyway – away. He tossed the bag into the bed of the truck as if it weighed nothing – and maybe it indeed didn’t, you wouldn’t know, because you hadn’t touched the entire thing – and made his way over to you, gratefully taking the other cup of coffee Sy had poured.

You knew better than to try striking up a conversation with either of them before they’d finished their morning coffee – it was so bad that whenever you had classes together in the mornings, you showed up there with two double espressos for them and a latte for you, because if you didn’t do that, they’d just grouch and snap at you all the way through the first half of class.

It was all the more surprising, then, when Sy suddenly asked Walter a very unexpected question: “Have you ever kissed a dude?” The answer was no, he hadn’t - to which followed an even more surprising question: “Ever wanted to try it?”

The casual energy of the shrug with which Walter answered that question was absolutely unmatched by anything you had ever seen, and you stared at the guys, wide-eyed as they leaned in until their lips touched. It wasn’t just a quick peck, either! No, there was tongue involved in this… And by the end of it?

“Eh,” Walter said, “not for me.” Sy agreed.

“I’m sorry,” you said, completely taken aback by the unexpectedness of what had just happened. “What? You can’t just… Stick your tongue down your friend’s throat and then casually decide… What?”

“Hey,” Sy said, his tone still infuriatingly indifferent, “don’t knock it till you try it.”

[newlacesleeves]

okay fine fine i'll take the silly karate show seriously for a second.

i have spent most of the day talking about what i liked about it because, well, there was a lot i did like. remember, the bar wasn't just on the floor. it was buried in mariana's trench. but to say it exceeded my expectations is still an understatement. i really did like it.

putting this under a cut. spoiler warning obv. (also me talking in stream of consciousness.)

as for criticisms, yeah i have some. the first being the same one everyone else has: there were almost no johnny & robby moments. robby beats miguel for captain and johnny chooses to comfort miguel for his loss. he gives them both the exact same speech before they fight. literally word for word. now, sure, we can imagine their relationship is still pretty fraught but this would have been a good opportunity for johnny to show how proud he is of robby and instead we got...nothing. huh. okay then.

the next would be tory. i cannot fucking fathom why they set up this friendship between sam and tory and everyone only for NONE OF HER FRIENDS to comfort her or go to her when her fucking mom dies. (on a positive note, that episode won the whole season for me. more on that later.) obviously the idea is to set up tory running straight into kreese's arms but also we could have had that set up and still shown some fucking sympathy for her. (another positive: peyton list can act her ass off.) it felt out of character for all of them. sam spends all of the third episode befriending tory. they have that million minute hug. what do you mean sam didn't run after her and instead just accepted her captain position?

also. samtory. i kinda wish they dragged it out just a little longer. especially considering what transpires in ep. 5 (or doesn't?)

devon and kenny. what devon did to kenny was fucked up and just. wow not okay. i didn't like it. i didn't find it funny. again, it's a set up for conflict between kenny and anthony but 1. is that really necessary at this point? and 2. why THAT? it was cruel and unnecessary. devon trained for like 6 weeks she's not as good as the others use that as a character development tool instead of her cheating to win. i liked devon when she was introduced. i don't know if i like her at all now. she came off as petulant and entitled and it left me feeling so disappointed in her.

and the miyagi secret. look, i think it's ridiculous that they added this plotline in the first place but besides that, what exactly did we learn? he may have robbed a guy and he was a boxer? and he fought in the sekai talkai? (that part might be intersting let's see where that goes.) it just didn't really land for me personally. we could probably do without it entirely and the season wouldn't change.

okay some positives now. guess what they're almost all about johnny i'm not even sorry if you're following me you should be expecting this from me.

from the fucking beginning we get to see some actual growth from him. the whole naming the dojo thing in previous seasons would have been the cause for the dojo divorce but johnny and daniel both handled it so well and so mature i could cry.

the fact that they made him a car salesman and not like a mechanic or a janitor was also great. i feel like this season they really gave johnny some positive pride in himself. the way he talks about eagle fang and how he built it himself. how he learns from chozen when they go house hunting. and him being a GOOD car salesman not just pretending to do it for laughs. i loved that. i loved it so fucking much. that's what i want to see going forward. to that end, they finally eased up on the "johnny is a moron" shtick. thank god. because he's actually not a moron, he's not a complete idiot he has thoughtful ideas and can create lesson plans that have deeper meanings and all of that is innate in his character and should be played up more rather than "here's the himbo from the 80s who doesn't know what pandora's box is or how public parks work."

episode 5 really nailed it for me. tory's grief is palpable. her fighting through it literally is beautiful to me. and yes, YES, it was the right thing to do to stop the fight okay i'm not saying they shouldn't have. but what we get out of that is a real and emotional and RAW fight between daniel and johnny. not about fighting styles or who has the better dojo. they are both coming at this situation from their own trauma and past and johnny explains that (bonus points for the laura mention THANK YOU WRITERS) and daniel isn't hearing him so he goes for the jugular and daniel reacts in the MOST DANIEL LARUSSO WAY I HAVE SEEN SINCE SEASON 3. he punches johnny right there and doesn't hold back even if you can see the regret on his face a moment later. and johnny -- the GROWTH is in the way he doesn't react. he doesn't punch back. it's a real fucking moment for the two of them. we aren't talking about defense vs. offense. we're talking about GRIEF and all of johnny's bottled rage about feeling sidelined by daniel this whole time (which has been sort of daniel's default stage for the last few seasons) comes spilling over the top and it was such a good moment of catharsis i will be thinking about it forever.

there were other things i liked: johnny leaning into his girl dad-ness, the fights (always the fights!!), the return of shawn, sleeveless gi my beloved, johnny prom king confirmation (never ever getting over it). but these were the stand out moments for me on my first watch.

and look. these were the first FIVE of FIFTEEN episodes for this season. a lot of y'all are acting like this is the whole thing when this is literally just the beginning. so i understand what you're saying about what the show lacked but it's not like they're ending it here. we have ten more episodes to go let's hope they continue the trajectory they're on in the next drop.

TL/DR: I LIKED IT A LOT.

[saltygilmores]

THOUGHTS WHILE WATCHING GILMORE GIRLS: S3/EP5/8 O CLOCK AT THE OASIS (PART 3) Aka SweaterPaws, Fake Fish, The Best Okuh Ever, And Jess Mariano Is A Waterlogged Infant Kitten

Parts 1 & 2 and all other episodes can be found in my pinned post.

This scene of Rory overhearing an answering maching message from Dwight's irate wife combines two of AmyShermanPalladino favorite things: answering machines and (the voice of) Alex Borstein (Celine & Drella on GG, Suzie on Mrs Maisel. Also Lois on Family Guy). Gilmore Girls Producer: Attention, Gilmore Girls crew! It has come to my attention that our budget will not cover both Outdoor Landscaping Scenes and Fishtanks. Sacrifices will have to be made.

Finally she admits to herself that Dean is a serial killer. And casual swearing from Rory? Wow, what a delight to hear.

!!!SWEATER PAWS ALERT!!!!

What do the kids say? Unbothered. Moisturized. Flourishing? In my lane? Something like that. It's clearly a school day (since Rory is in her uniform) while it appears to be a rare day where Jess hasn't been scheduled to work in the Coffee Mines before school. Speaking of school, he's walking away from school instead of towards it and is not carrying any school supplies or a backpack. He looks happy. Just vibing in his ugly oversized clothing. Hopefully he looks up every so often so he doesn't walk face first into a lamp post.

Or that.

Blue Crush was a 2002 movie about a girl who surfs starring Kate Bosworth. Get it? Cause Rory is covered in water?

Hey. Eyes up top, Pal.

The floofy hair. The prominent draggy lip. The five o'clock shadow. Salty enjoys naming things she can see.

How many of Jess' books have been ruined with water? 2 so far. The answer is 2.

And now...ladies and Gentlemen...I present the greatest Milo Okuh Ever Okuh'D:

Get you a man who will risk soaking himself and pretend he didn't assist you with turning off a sprinkler so your boyfriend Dean won't fly into a jealous rage over it. It brings a tear to ol Salty’s eye. The episode wraps up with Lorelai attempting to end the Peyton Sanders nonsense by apologizing to Emily and taking the blame for the entire incident. Silly Lorelai, she didn't consider "What would Emily Gilmore think?" first and foremost before agreeing to go on one date with a random guy. I mean, Lorelai declining a second date with Peyton could have caused Emily to lose rank in her Tea Party Circle with Peyton's mother or some nonsense like that, according to a ridiculous story Richard just told Lorelai earlier in the episode. Let me be clear here, in case the message got a little lost- I am 100% siding with Lorelai here. She should not have to grovel like this over something so meaningless.

HOGWASH. Stop this right now Lorelai. Emily is standing just a few feet away and you're in a kitchen filled with many sharp knives and cooking implements. I'll look the other way. She even agrees to go on a second date with Peyton just to pacify Emily even though she just made it painfully clear how miserable it would make her to see this dude again. Emily is quite pleased seeing Lorelai's state of misery. Well, like I said earlier, you do only have a very small window of time before David Bowie stops performing forever, so go for it I guess. Take the tickets, then drop Hamm. Drop him like Rory dropped out of Yale. I have a final comment: Although by the end of this episode we don't see Rory at school, one would have to presume that after the sprinkler incident she either had to get on the bus and go to school sopping wet or go home and change and blowdry her hair and risk being very late to class. Either she gets reprimanded for showing up to school late or she gets reprimanded for the wet uniform and hair so she's screwed no matter what. If he didn't take an ounce of pity on Rory for her Hit By A Deer story, do you think Headmaster Charleston would buy some fantastical tale from Rory about her tardiness being due to a sprinkler, sweater paws, a neighbor with a board game fetish, and Dean the unabomber?

[vimesbootstheory]

CK S6 Pt1 Thoughts

Do we still call this "the cut" or did we leave that behind on LJ? Anyway the thoughts are under the cut. I haven't looked at anyone else's thoughts yet, no idea whether this is echo chamber stuff or if I watched a different show than the rest of you.

Overall I honestly had a blast, I'm probably gonna talk more here about stuff I disliked but that's because positive stuff kept me glued to the screen while negative stuff sent me to vent in the notes doc I had open in another window lol

Eagle Fang was Johnny's thing, not an extension of Kreese's Cobra Kai, and I was so angry at the show for not understanding that that I burst into tears

I continue to think that the big cast is spreading character work too thin, such that most characters were either made much less interesting than they have been in previous seasons (e.g. Daniel, Miguel) or were given too little time with the character work they had (e.g. Robby, Kenny) or both.

Characters I made particular note of who are now boring: Daniel, Amanda, Sam, Hawk.

I was surprised in particular how Daniel was given virtually no character work other than this token Miyagi thing. I prefer when Daniel's a bitch. Daniel being The Reasonable One is incredibly boring.

We kinda got slutty gi back? In hallucination form? Briefly?

This was a hard realization: I don't think I ship Daniel/Johnny in these episodes. I'm still absolutely bonkers for them in previous seasons (1-4 mostly) and in the fandom sphere but honestly I wanted Johnny away from Daniel most of the time in s6e1-5. I found it really off-putting how much Daniel was trying to change Johnny into someone he's not.

Fave new character was Kwon. Enjoyably silly. I like his anime hair.

Delighted that Jarmen baby is a girl, even more delighted that the topic of the baby was pretty backgrounded, didn't spend a lot of time on it.

I am filled with incandescent rage that they neutered SamTory; it was weird rooting for Johnny's terrible strategies to make them frenemies instead of friends. But it looks like they're not quite done yet so I'm gonna cool my heels on this point.

Team Captain nepo babies lol. I would be so pissed if I were any of the other Miyagi-Do students.

Loved Johnny championing his female students. In an ideal world I would not have had a little voice at the back of my head wishing he'd spend the same kind of quality time with Robby (How about some Robby time? Robby? Robby now? Johnny and Robby?); nevertheless for what it was, I still really like Johnny supporting Devon and (to a lesser extent) Tory. Meanwhile Daniel over here in his sexist era I guess, ok. Like he really only wanted to send his daughter and no other girls.

Peyton List is the part-season's MVP, obviously obviously. She was so great. Kicked ass, kicked acting's ass. Tory was probably the meatiest character of the season, too, though that's not saying a ton.

My worst fears were not realized re: Johnny's character. He still isn't the fully-realized guy he was in early seasons, but relative to other characters, he's having a pretty OK season IMO. Knock on wood.

I was unexpectedly all riled up on Anthony's behalf. Why does he HAVE to get into karate? Why does he have to be Daniel 2.0? At least this was addressed textually.

So pissed on Kenny's behalf. Justice for Kenny. He deserved one of the top 6 spots. He got poo pants instead. Jesus Christ.

Loved the Lawrence vs Barnes fight, very metal, excellent choreo, love watching Zabka move. I would bet the cobros are lighting up at having an answer on that particular head-to-head.

This has been a running thing with Cobra Kai for a while, but I'm not even sure how I as an audience member was supposed to see Johnny's current teaching style? Honestly I loved his day of blended-style lessons. Obviously broken glass in the koi pond is not a great idea. But like. Jesus Christ, Daniel, katas HAVE STRIKES. WHAT DO YOU EVEN WANT.

Did they really just write Chozen out without any goodbyes? :(((

Daniel's ego flare-up and "I'm the boss" moment, contender for only interesting aspect to his character in these five eps. Hell yea hell yea. Show some goddamn teeth Daniel LaRusso.

One thing I think CK excels at and has always excelled at is keeping the stakes up for tournament-style fights, such that more often than not, I can't tell just through narrative signposting who's going to win. Robby vs Miguel in particular was a nail-biter. I did a full-body arm-pump when Robby won. Though the stakes were weird because it's not as someone can't win in Barcelona if they're not a captain? That was confusing and makes me think it's going to be their way of doling out successes across the main four kids. Like Robby and Sam for the captains, and then Miguel will win, presumably Tory too when she flip-flops back to team good guys again.

Interesting acting/directing/writing (idk which) choice during Robby vs Miguel, Johnny visibly rooting for Robby.

I love that Johnny brought up losing his mum when Tory's mum died, but I really hope they get the chance to bond over it at some point.

The fuckin magic jewel bottle cap got me so bad. Resourceful DIY toys is poor person realness and it was so cute and heartbreaking.

It's weird that new!CK got into the tournament because it's clearly not really the same dojo, so they haven't really qualified.

I'm so pumped about Kreese being the main villain. That was true before the season began and I still feel that way.

I'm excited for part 2!

[toothfund]

Thank you for your ongoing support and patience. My first appointment is tomorrow (Monday, March 18th) and I may not have the energy to say much afterwards, so I thought I'd update everyone today. Our next goal is funding the third procedure, for teeth #12, #14, and #15 by April 17th. We are $683 away as I'm writing this.

I'm not sure if anyone will enjoy these silly drawings, but I feel the urge to make something in response to everyone's generosity. Thank you again to everyone who shared my story and those able to donate!

[the-ventriloquizt]

[ Image: A drawing of Peyton Riley/The Ventriloquist in my attempt at the DC Superhero Girls art style. She has nearly shoulder length blonde hair that curls in at the ends with a bang that covers one side of her face. She has a cut on the bridge of her nose, peach makeup on her eye and lips, and eyelashes on the bottom of her eye. She is wearing a red dress with a white collar, short sleeves, and a little cut on the side that ends in some stitching. She has red elbow-length gloves and is wearing a dark purple sweater over her shoulders like a capelet. She has one round brass earring and a brass heart shaped locket, with peach tights and dark grey flats. One pose has her standing with a hand held up in greeting and a smile on her face, the other has her standing with her fists clenched at either side, her stance wider and her face twisted in a frown. She says, "I did NOT make him up! Al is REAL and my BOYFRIEND!… He just goes to a private school. And he doesn't have a cell phone." Above these drawings is the inside of the locket, showing a greyscale photo of Scarface's head, surrounded by various colors of heart shaped mini stickers. This is labeled 'Locket View'.]

Silly Peyton Riley Superhero Girls concept under cut:

Peyton's seen as a really pretty girl and keeps getting asked out, but she says she has a boyfriend already, referring to someone named 'Al'. She won't show any pictures of him, he doesn't have a phone, and he goes to a school somewhere else, but he's sooo cool and protective and handsome.

Zatanna's dad mentions that a special, possibly cursed puppet had been stolen from a colleague, and Zatanna tries to look into it and a rash of thefts plaguing the school. Everything kinda slides into place over the course of the story and it turns out Peyton stole Scarface, AKA "Al", from a magic shop because she thought he was cute. She was originally just using him as an excuse to turn down all the boys at school that keep trying to ask her out, but now she's convinced herself that Scarface not only loves her too, but wants her to steal valuable jewelry and watches and the lot from her fellow students for him.

[paceypeternathanslawyer]

Sophia: You and Kate are having so much fun together. I can tell you were so amused watching the boys do karaoke.

Joy: That was hysterical. 

Sophia: It's so funny them dancing. I died! I like that they had them doing some of the same choreography. I just couldn't stop laughing. They're boys forever. 

Joy: James commits so hard. 

Hilarie: Oh my god! Who was that guy on stage? Listen, we spent years, we spent the better part of our twenties singing karaoke in Wilmington and you know who never came? James Lafferty. Never! And he's all in this scene... hilarious! The dance moves? Who is that guy?

Sophia: It was so good.

Joy: He's never met a challenge, like a reasonable challenge that he's said no to. I think they just knew that they could write him anything and he would do it. 

Sophia: And what I also really liked is you get to see-- we see James and Stephen's friendship so clearly in this episode and the way they egg each other on and you're like, yeah of course they went on and made "Everyone Is Doing Great," of course they're business partners. Look at them! They in this episode gave me a lot of like Brooke and Peyton and their lifelong thing energy. And that's a big thing to create between two characters who are newer friends on screen and it's sweet. 

Hilarie: i was just gonna say, the bromance in this episode, I really responded to. I liked seeing the little boys and the big boys. We've had conversations about toxic masculinity. I think at a certain point little boys are allowed to have close friendships and it's adorable and we applaud it and they share their feelings with each other and it's so special and then at some point they're made to feel weird about that. And so they bottle stuff up and they don't do silly shit together anymore. And so seeing these boys play together was so sweet and I like that our show did that. I thought that Chad did a good job directing that. I like that he directed just like silly boy time. Silly boy time is my favorite kind of boy time.

🎤🔥 Drama Queens Podcast 🎤🔥

[itmeansiris]

The Solar System Legacy Challenge: Good days and Bad Gen 1 pt.44

After their second day at the Newcrest office Kason changes and tries to leave in a hurry, but Paris catches him on the way out.

Paris: Tinker Station set you on fire?

Kason: What?

Paris: You seem like your in a rush. Hot date with your phone and a hotel room?

Kason: Really Paris.

Paris: I'm kidding. Your being so boring, always cooped up in that room.

Kason: Goodnight Paris.

She folds her arms and smiles.

Paris: Have fun!

Mercury true to her word, takes the kids to San Myshuno to visit with Winter and Peyton. Adrianna and Crimson take the triplets to play while M, Winter and Peyton talk in the Livingroom.

Peyton: How's life without the tinker fairy?

Winter: Peyton shut up. M how are you feeling?

M: Its okay. I told you my mom and dad came over and the kids have been good, Things are fine...

Winter: Then why do you look so sad.

M: I don't know....its just the trip..

Winter: And?

Peyton: That girl from Kason's office. The one he's been complaining about for weeks. He was pissed when Greg gave him the kid as a trainee.

Winter: That's what your worried about? M there's no way. Kason would never cheat on you!

Peyton: Come on M this is my brother were talking about. Even I know better than that.

M: You guys have it all wrong. I'm not worried he's going to woohoo her or anything. I just...miss him you know. We've never been apart like this, he's working and I don't want to get in the way. It's silly

Winter: So its not about leprechaun Paris?

That gets a laugh out of both Mercury and Peyton.

M: No. I trust Kason. That thought never even crossed my mind. Plus he hates her more than I do. I'm just feeling lonely I guess.

Winter: I'll take care of that. Peyton watch the kids for a bit. I'm gonna take M for a drink at the POLA Rooftop Bar @ The Seno

( @lesmana-enterprise-ltd )

While Uncle Peyton played babysitter Winter and M went out for some much deserved best friend time.

[artfromsaturn]

 Previous Dresses: Scarecrow | Riddler, Ra’s, Two-face, & Penguin

I think this will be the last of my Batman Villain Lolita Post for now, with a few of the more challenging villains.  Again, feel free to make your own designs or use these in some way, the more the merrier. :D  

A few thoughts underneath the read more + alt colors for Zsazs & Killer Moth

Black version for Zsazs to keep with his pants & classic Killer Moth:

Pyg: I think he’s one of the most Devianart Edgelord of the Batman villains, but his portrayal in Arkham Knight was done well enough that I warmed up to him.  His plastic surgery nightmare face design is fun and the reactions of the victims & other people worked well, and showed Lazlo as terribly messed up instead of cool edgelordsona.  Like, you know, a person who’d exist.  Good job Batwriters. 

Anyway I leaned towards the guro lolita + simple butcher look his comic and his game designs went for.  There are extra additions of frills for both a more “doll”ish look and a touch of ita, since tacky feels part of his character.  I didn’t want to just make a mask so I framed the hair as “pigtails” (what else?).  I think some make up would add to the look to make the doll idea and the pig idea go farther.  The pattern on the bottom of the skirt and boots is supposed to be those chain link people you can cut from a piece of paper that all hold hands, all perfect, like Pyg declares his dollitrons.  I’m not sure how successful the transparent apron is but at the end oft the day I like it and that’s what counts.

Freeze: This design might lean too much towards literal costume and less into a more practical interpretation of the design, but I can’t help it, I like the Tron and glowy stuff aesthetic.  Doing a retro futuristic lolita look was too fun of an idea to pass up.  Not much has changed outside of converting it to a dress and turning the gauntlets into Miku bell sleeves.  Snowflake earrings & delicate hair for Fries’ one true love & because they’re pretty.

Black Mask: I didn’t want to do all skulls since there’s enough dresses out there that do that, so I ended up with the mask part of his name.  Made sure to give the rich colors of a mobster along with the swag of the suit as well.  I think this one could be designed to be better and less busy (to fit in with the sleekness of Black Mask’s look more) but I wanted to go a bit over the top because why not, Lolita’s very theatrical.  

Ventriloquist: Ok, this is a silly one.  This is nice and casual lolita that doesn’t look too close to Wesker, but that’s because Wesker’s design is supposed to be intentionally plain and meek.  Without the (badly drawn, sorry) Tommy gun purse & Scarface, I don’t think he’s recognizable.  That’s not a bad thing - him and Scarface complement each other perfectly and make a memorable design.  So I did my best to make a cute casual coord and add the few touches to make it look more like Wesker, & drew a teeny Scarface to show such.  I wish I could have done more to reference Peyton Riley/the second Ventriloquist but all I could capture was the color since her design is also very simple. 

Scarface himself only got colors that were closer to the outfit.  I didn’t fancy him up too much since I think it would mess with the gangster look he has, which is already close to aristocrat fashion in the lolita world.  He was lucky not to get extra frills at the ends of his sleeves!

Zsazs: another mainly Arkham Design.  Most of mine are based partially on Arkham since that’s where I get most of my Batman fix, apologies!  Anyway, I just liked the idea of a skin-flesh dress with the locks and buckles of the Arkham prisoner jacket/uniform.  The bell sleeves already being on him made this a lot easier.  I left a spot open where I was going to draw the bat symbol, but I decided against it.

Killer Moth: Top are his Arkham Asylum Artwork colors since I think they’re very nice.  Went for a cute little 1960s inspired fur coat & bob, as his design is already psychedelic. Gave a fun flower crown to round out the colors & hold up some cute moth antenna.

Firefly: His The Batman design was the most unique to pull from and a good starting point to make an outfit.  I took some inspiration of the warning stripes, junk around the belt, & burnt skin tights from the Arkham version too.  *ellis voice* I ever tell you about the time Keith and I made fireworks? Otherwise, his design would have been much harder to work with considering it’s mostly a solid suit with not many features in his apperances.  It would have had to be more abstract if I went for one of those.  

But yeah his The Batman design and designs spinning off from it kick ass, so I did a sporty-ish look.  I hope the bonnet doesn’t look too silly, I just wanted headware that differed the outfit from Killer Moth better.

Strange: Another design that had to go with the Arkham look.  Strange is a classic villain with his face being one of his big, defining features.  This is a great thing in character design, it just means it’s harder to make an outfit around it! 

I love the classic mad scientist look so I didn’t stray too far from it, it looks fun medical Lolita already. All I really did was add the medical book brain pattern (thank you British Library) + little bats, because of course he’d have bats on his brain.  It’s also a nod to his habit of Batman Cosplay & impersonation.

A few people I thought of but didn’t make dresses for:

Joker - He’s fabulous, I just didn’t feel jokery & wanted to focus on others more.

Catwoman, Harley, & Ivy - All three ladies have so many designs it’s hard to choose.  They have so much more freedom with their designs than most of the male crooks.  I’d have to make like... 4+ outfits for each just like I did with Scarecrow if I was to ever be satisifed. ;w;

Mad Hatter, White Rabbit - All the Alice themed supervillains have been done as Lolita Coords by Lolita fashion already since, well, Alice was a big inspiration for the fashion in general. I’d be down for them but I just felt bad because I couldn’t think of how to separate them from others as well as I could, like how I made Black Mask’s design more elaborate as to make sure the themes and connections to the villain was clear rather than just a skull design.

Killer Croc & Man-bat: Also hard to differ between a general animal-themed coord and them.  

Thanks, hope you guys are enjoying your new year so far. :D

[wordwiilderness]

Finished Iron Flame by Rebecca Yarros, here are some thoughts...

Overall, I thought Iron Flame was slightly better than Fourth Wing, which was surprising because often sequels that come after big reveals that suddenly expand the world our story is in can make the story feel unfamiliar and disorienting.

I was also open about how unhappy I was at the end of Fourth Wing when Xaden was portrayed as the wrongful party for keeping the rebellion a secret from the daughter of the general who a) was a leader of the kingdom they were rebelling against and b) executed his and many other children's parents from rebelling before them :/ But please, explain to me why your less-than-a-year-long relationship trumps all that.

Iron Flame did a little better by letting Xaden stand up for himself and giving Violet better reasons to feel betrayed (i.e. not wanting to be lied to about things that put her in danger rather than just wanting full disclosure because they're dating).

I enjoyed how the rebellion plot played out. I won't say much about it to avoid spoilers, but lots of new information is revealed! It felt well planned out, and it was interesting to see how each of the characters reacted to learning the empire and their friends' secrets.

My biggest criticism in terms of plot and worldbuilding for both Fourth Wing and Iron Flame is that the Venin are not at all compelling villains. I really don't have anything good to say about them. The conflict that makes this series interesting is the political corruption within the empire.

We also learn more about dragons and their governing system in this book, which I was especially excited about. Lots of the information we got left me with more questions than answers, so I'm very excited to see what comes next. In the third book, I'm hoping we get to see the Empyrean in action and get to meet more of the dragon elders.

I felt that this second book focused more on the plot than the first book, which I think was a good choice for this series. I can't help but compare Rebecca Yarros's writing to Sarah J. Maas's fantasy romances because they're very similar in my mind. With Maas's writing, I always see her series decline after the main couple gets together and there's not enough plot and worldbuilding to carry the series. I was worried Yarros would follow the same script, but it seems like now that Violet and Xaden have agreed they're in love, we're seeing more focus turn to other parts of the story. It's not that the romance part of the story has completely been abandoned, but that the author doesn't have to fill the entire book with smut and relationship drama to make up for a terrible plot.

In the third book, I would like to see more focus on Violet's other relationships and even more development of plot and worldbuilding. I think this book's biggest weakness is that we didn't get to see much development of Violet's friendships and most disappointingly, her long-lost brother that she recently reunited with.

Overall, this is still a fun series! I'm excited to see what the third book brings to the table!

[thealmightyemprex]

Disney Month:The Love Bug 1997

For the 17th installment in Disney month we shall look at the TV movie reboot/sequel to the classic Herbie franchise ,The Love Bug

In this 1997 TV movie Herbie,a living Volkswagon Beetle finds himself with Hank Cooper(Bruce Campbell ) a mechanic and former race driver with his own insecrurities and a bit of jealously over all the attention the car gets,ignoring is oddball artist friend Roddy Martel(Kevin J O Connor) telling him the car is alive ,meanwhile a former owner of Herbie,the pompus race car driver Simon Moore III (John Hannah ) makes contact with Herbies creator  Dr. Gustav Stumpfel (Harold Gould ) to make his own living car ,the feral Horace

The Herbie series,which follows the adventures of this living car ,was iconic back in the day,one of Disneys few big franchises (Which I know sounds insane now ,considering the MCU...Which this has a connection to.....I'll get to that ),though now is seen as a curiosity ,a forgotten relic of a bygone time,or just dismissed as stupid.I will confess I am not a Herbie expert ,I have only seen three films (This one,the original Love Bug ,and Herbie Fully Loaded ) but I am a Herbie defender,I actually think the premise is cute despite having a disdain for cars . I think the original Love Bug is a classic and while my memories are hazy ,I enjoyed Fully Loaded as a kid .But What are my thoughts on this film.....Honestly I really enjoyed it

Now I have seen some lukewarm thoughts on this film dismissing it as only noteworthy cause the lead is Bruce Campbell and if you know me well you might be scoffing and saying "Oh they only like it cause they like Bruce Campbell"....I cant lie and say thats NOT a factor,because it is.I am a Bruce Campbell fanatic ,I adore Evil Dead, The Adventures of Brisco County Jr ,Bubba Ho Tep ,Man With The Screaming Brain ,My Name is Bruce ,his performances in Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs ,Maniac Cop ,Black Friday ,Lois and Clark ,his cameos in Sam Raimis Spiderman franchise ,I could keep going .Point is he is one of my favorite actors,having old school movie star charisma /good looks, a character actors sensibilities and expert comedic slapstick timing on par with the old masters like Buster Keaton or Harold Lloyd .I am a fan and as a fan it is fun to see him get to be in a goofy Disney comedy as opposed to usual horror fare he is well known ,but not just in a "Tee hee aint it wacky to see Ash talk to Herbie " way,I think he is a legit good choice for the lead,cause he is charmy,got his trademark snark ,but can do the vulnerability and make you believe that he cares for this car ,cause of course he can , this guy fought his HAND in a movie ,he can definately make me belive he has a friendship with a living car .So yeah it is a factor ,but its because he is such a good actor I think he is an asset......But I dont think he is the only asset

So I kind of find it baffeling people looked at this and dismissed it because it has so many THINGS that make it stand out....Including the fact the director is Peyton Reed,who has gone on to direct THE ANT MAN trilogy ,and he kind of brings the same sensibility he brought to Ant Man to this ,which I can only describe as lovingly silly. Like the movie knows its audience will find it silly ,and while it acknowledges it ,it loves it and embraces it .It pokes fun at some cliches but it also embraces some,and because some things are played sincere,they also are really funny

The cast is great ,not just Campbell ,as the film is full of character actors .We get some fun small parts from Burton Gilliam and Jeff Garlin ,and highly enjoyable supporting performances by Clerance Williams III ,Harolg Gould ,Dana Gould , and Micky Dolenz .Alexandra Wentworth is a good love tinterest,playing with some tropes ,and John Hannah is a very entertaining weasily pompous villain .My favorite character is Roddy played by Kevin J O Connor who is this artist who is able to communicate with Herbie ,being very lovable as wel as very funny .Also Dean Jones,star of the original film reprises his role of Jim Douglas ,and even though he isnt in the film alot its fun to see him here

I adore Horace the evil car ,I like that he is an extention of Simons evil and is a feral monster ,but has a connection with Simon .I think the production team did a really good job giving menace to this car

My only complaint is it feels like Herbie himself gets sidelined ,but the film still works.

Overall,this is such a fun underrated gem and not a bad intro to Herbie,though personally I think ones should watch the original film first

@ariel-seagull-wings @goodanswerfoxmonster @the-blue-fairie @angelixgutz @princesssarisa @themousefromfantasyland @amalthea9 @filmcityworld1 @marquisedemasque

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

Happy birthday

Masterlist

A/N: In honor of the birthday of my loveliest non-rodent bestie @geralts-yenn, I gave Mike access to a can of whipped cream. I shouldn't have. So if you're someone who strongly opposes inappropriate uses of dairy products, I'd sit this one out...

Pairing: Mike (Hellraiser) x reader

Summary: Mike makes you breakfast on your birthday...

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, SMUT, MINORS DNI. Food play, oral (f receiving), p-in-v sex, shower sex, fingering (f receiving), semi-facial... I think that's all?

@geralts-yenn @deandoesthingstome @ellethespaceunicorn @sillyrabbit81 @peyton-warren @summersong69 @mayloma @livisss @littlefreya

“Happy birthday, baby.” Oh, it’s a happy birthday for sure; the sight of Mike in nothing but an apron never gets old. It doesn’t happen often... only every Sunday when he finally manages to leave your tits alone and crawl out of bed to make you breakfast. Normally it’s pancakes, or eggs and bacon, or a grilled cheese, but today it’s waffles. With more whipped cream than any person should reasonably consume in a month. Unless you’re Mikey.

“Mike, are there…” He doesn’t let you finish. Instead, he puts two fresh waffles on a plate, throws on some fruit, a drizzle of honey and a sensible amount of whipped cream.

“There you go.” He knows you well.

“Mike, seriously?” You can barely see his second helping of waffles under all the whipped cream anymore, and he’s adding more?

“Yeah? You want some?” He grins widely as he holds out the can to you and accidentally presses down, sending an unsolicited stream of whipped cream your way. It hits you in the face, then drops down, straight into your cleavage. Accident, you say? We think not.

“Mike!” Too late, he’s already on his feet, rounding the table to get to you.

“I’ll get that!” And, of course, he dives face-first between your tits to ‘retrieve’ the rogue topping. You’ve just stepped out of the shower, so you’re – conveniently for him – not wearing anything but your short satin bathrobe, which he pulls open immediately. Mike makes a show of lapping up the spilled whipped cream before sucking one of your nipples into his mouth.

“Mike, the whipped cream is gone,” you sigh, trying to get him to stop so you can eat, but you missed one tiny little detail; he’s brought the can. You hear the tell-tale sound before you really realize what’s happening – and what’s happening is Mike covering your other boob in even more whipped cream.

“There’s some over there,” he mutters against your skin before diligently getting to work. You sigh deeply at your extremely silly boyfriend, who ever so selflessly helps you clean up the mess he just made. The worst part is: his tongue against your skin doesn’t exactly leave you cold, and you can already feel heat pooling between your legs, and you glare at Mike and his smug, content grin as he continues to make a mess of your chest.

It's impossible not to give in to his touch: his enthusiasm is infectious as always, and you learned a long time ago that it’s in no one’s best interest to deny yourself the wonderful things he has in store for you just because you think it’s silly. ‘Silly’ came pre-installed with Mike, and there’s no denying it hasn’t been a life-changing experience – usually for the better.

When you first started dating him, you always found yourself coming up with excuses, and while they sometimes still pop up – especially when Mike once again seems to think he can squeeze an hour in fifteen minutes and you have dinner reservations or, God forbid, a plane to catch – you mostly know his reactions by now. ‘You’re making a mess’: ‘We have a shower.’ ‘I just took a shower’: ‘Another one isn’t going to bankrupt us.’ ‘Breakfast is getting cold’: Fuck breakfast. Actually, more like ‘breakfast fuck’.

Your own thoughts make you chuckle – as you always do when you catch yourself thinking like Mike – and a smile finally breaks through your frown, to which Mike responds by flashing you a triumphant grin. In one smooth movement, he gets up and pulls you up from your chair. It’s easy to forget how fast he is when properly motivated.

He drags you to your bedroom and tosses you on the bed, and as he does, you briefly remember that you said something the day before about changing the sheets, but Mike had protested the boring task until you’d given up. Had he actually been planning ahead? Maybe you were rubbing off on him in some ways, too? A chuckle escapes you when you look at Mike, standing at your feet at the side of the bed. He’s still wearing the apron, which does nothing to hide his boner. It looks hilarious, even though you know more than well enough that what’s so poorly concealed underneath the loose fabric is no laughing matter.

Your tumble to the mattress had provided your bathrobe with the final nudge to come mostly undone, and Mike grins as he lets his gaze glide over your now mostly naked body. It makes his cock twitch, causing you to laugh again, only to stop when you see Mike’s eyes narrow. One sharp tug at the string behind his back takes care of the apron, and then he practically jumps you. No, scratch that, he literally jumps you.

Straddling your thighs, he leans forward and kisses you all over your face and neck, his lips still sticky from the whipped cream. Then, he moves away, giving himself room to create an artful path of even more sugary goodness down your chest and stomach that he happily follows moments later, slowly making his way down your body. He licks, teases, sometimes abandoning his pre-determined path to leave little love bites on your skin. You don’t bother trying to stay still ‘so the whipped cream doesn’t get everywhere’ – it’s already everywhere, and it’s great. Until…

“Mike, no!” You stop him just in time. Yeast infections make for very poor birthday presents.

Mike pouts, then shrugs as he licks his lips, and reaches for the discarded apron to wipe his hands and face with so much pageantry that you crack up again, but your laughter dies down quickly when he hooks his arms around your thighs and pulls you to the edge of the bed, sending a shiver of anticipation cascading through your body. Luckily, Mike isn’t exactly famous for his patience, and his sticky exploration was all the teasing he could muster.

He gets a good taste of you, running his impatient tongue along the length of your slit a few times before settling at your clit, blue eyes staring up at you as a near-continuous stream of content moans emerges from him. There’s no doubt in your mind that he likes this just as much as you do, and you’re definitely loving every second of it.

You’ve taught him well. He knows exactly what he’s doing, taking his cue from the sounds you make to work you up to the edge of ecstasy in no time – keeping you there for as long as he can manage. He loves to watch you cum. It’s something you’ve always adored about him, and not just because it means you’re regularly on the receiving end of some really good head – although you wouldn’t dream of complaining about that. The biggest part of it is that he’s really taken the time to figure you out, and as a result, he now knows you inside and out. True, your brains don’t always operate on exactly the same wavelength, but you both try. For each other.

And right now, Mike is trying – really hard – to suck your soul out through your pussy.

A happy hum escapes him when you tangle your hand in his hair and pull him closer, and one tactical roll of your hips pulls you over the edge. Of course, he doesn’t stop there. Because he loves to tease you a little after you cum. Mike, if left unattended, will overstimulate you until you can’t see straight. It takes a few playful yet firm smacks to the top of his head to get him to stop.

Without hesitation, you grab his chin and pull him towards you. A fierce push lands him on his back on the bed, and he looks at you, his eyes glistening hopefully and a wide, dopey grin spreading on his face. It’s your turn – and he can’t wait.

In fact, he’s so impatient, that he’s taken it upon himself to retrieve the can of whipped cream and before you can protest, he puts a bit of it on the tip of his cock while shooting you a daring glance. You wait a beat before leaning down and carefully suck the whipped cream off his cock – without touching him. He pouts and reapplies for a second try – which ends the same way. Another attempt…

You relish the long, frustrated whine that he lets out, and chuckle when he changes his approach. This time, the whole underside of his cock is subjected to the whipped cream treatment. You laugh. Does he think you don’t have the patience to keep teasing him the same way? Slowly, you crawl back until your face is between his thighs, where you playfully nip and lap at his legs before moving up. With the tip of your tongue, you lightly trace a line over his balls, and when you get to the base of his cock… Son of a bitch!

You’re silent for a beat, then laugh. “Mike, what?” you manage after a moment. Mike – in his infinite wisdom – decided he had enough of your teasing, and apparently thought it was a good idea to slap you in the face with his cock. Result? Whipped cream everywhere.

It takes him a moment to join you in your laughter, which dies down again almost immediately, when you rip the can from his hands and attack him with its contents. Of course, he retaliates, and you wrestle each other until the can is empty and you’re both sticky, out of breath and dying of laughter.

“We’re supposed to be adults,” you sigh after a while, when you’ve sort of managed to stop laughing.

“Oh, I’ve been opting out of that for years,” Mike responds with a smile. “We might want to get cleaned up though.”

After carefully moving your sticky sheets to the washing machine – which is quite a journey, since you’re simultaneously trying to keep the rest of the house as un-sticky as possible – you make your way over to the shower. As always, your ritual begins with a quick squabble over the water temperature, followed by a long hug as you let the water begin to wash away the last traces of your food fight. Soon, Mike gets squirmy, running his hands over your back and sides, burying his face in your neck so he can kiss you until you’re moaning in his arms, and having a little too much fun with the sound his hands make when he smacks your wet ass.

You’re subjected to a very thorough removal of all things whipped cream – especially your chest. Of course, it’s only fair you return the favor. Right? He squirms and moans as you run your hand over his hard cock, the other hand at his neck so you can pull him into a deep kiss. It takes him a lot less time to be convinced that his dick is clean than it did to convince him that your boobs were, that’s for sure. Not that any of that surprises you.

Without warning, he turns you around, pulling you flush against his chest while his hand travels down your front. A quiet moan when he dips his fingers into your pussy tells you what you already knew; you’re not done with him just yet. And he’s not done with you, or so it seems, because he picks up his rigorous cleaning regimen from before.

Then, you hear a hum that lets you know he has an idea – and you don’t like it one bit. His fingers slip out of you, while his other hand reaches for the showerhead.

“Mike…” you warn – you don’t even know why. You know you’re on board with this, he knows you’re on board with this… It’s a good thing this man hardly ever listens to a word you say, really. He pushes you towards the wall until you stop yourself with your hands, then pulls your hips back. You spread your legs a little to give him easier access while he slips two fingers into you from behind – his other hand aims the shower head at your clit.

Even like this, he knows what he’s doing, and it doesn’t take long until your legs tremble and your cries bounce off the tiles. His fingers brush past your g-spot time after time, and he takes you apart in record time.

“Fuck!” You grab the shower head from his hand when you cum and pull it away from where he was holding it between your legs, not just because the feeling of the water is overwhelming, but also because – in the past – a shower head may or may not have died because Mike decided he needed to fuck you right that second and dropped the damn thing.

“That’s the idea, Sweetcheeks,” he chuckles. You barely have any time to put the shower head back before Mike sinks into you from behind. You can’t hold back a moan, and Mike can’t hold back anything. “Fuck yeah,” he mutters under his breath, nuzzling your neck as he pulls back and slams back into you.

He’s rough in his enthusiasm, and definitely unburdened by anything resembling patience, and you’re a trembling mess, bracing yourself against the cool tiles. You throw your hips back, meeting his thrusts, while you try to control your moans at least a little – and fail miserably.

Mike’s hands move away from your hips, snaking around you as he moves closer to you, bending towards you until his chest rests against your back, and his movements slow down. “I love you, baby,” he mutters in your ear as he grinds his hips into you. Again, you mirror his movements, leaning your head against his and sighing deeply. Before you can protest, his lips latch onto your neck, and he sucks on your skin as if his life depends on it.

“Mike!” you hiss, barely suppressing a laugh. It works; he stops – but judging from the sheepish laugh that escapes him, the damage has already been done.

“Mine.” He nips at your earlobe before moving away from you again, grabbing your hips harshly, digging his fingertips into your flesh. You smile through your moans as you listen to the pretty little sounds he makes as he works himself closer to the finish line. God, he’s cute… “Turn around, please?” You can’t see the puppy eyes, but you know they’re there. Apparently, he’s not done making a mess of you.

You turn around and carefully sink to your knees. It’s not hard to guess what he wants – his love of holding your boobs is second only to his love of cumming all over them, which is exactly what he’s about to do. A very nice bonus is that you get a nice close-up of him jerking off before he does. It’s mesmerizing to see the way he moves his hand over his cock, the twitching of his abs, how his eyes are closed in concentration as his entire vocabulary is reduced to the word ‘fuck’, his hand reaching for the wall behind you for support…

You’re barely in time to close your eyes when he explodes – his aim is never perfect, but today he's not even trying. Thick ropes of cum land on your face and chest, and you’re already having fun with the thought of how much he’s going to love the view when he opens his eyes.

He lets out a groan when he does, and finds you staring up at him. “Pretty,” he moans as he reaches for your arm to pull you up, “so fucking pretty with my cum all over your face…” He pulls you up and pushes you against the wall, crashing his mouth against yours and practically forcing his tongue into your mouth – no malicious intent, just the greedy impatience of a man with zero impulse control.

“Let’s get cleaned up and finish breakfast,” you laugh when you push him off of you after a while.

“Can’t, we’re out of whipped cream…”

[volaryvirus]

wasn’t planning on posting trad art here but i thought these sketchbook doodles turned out quite silly xP

first is of my oc Peyton, second is Peyton and Cas, and third is my sona

[whatname0523]

How I picture the back to school shopping convo going:

C: Babe, Peyton and I are going school shopping this Saturday for a few hours.

T: I thought you did that last weekend??

P: That was supplies shopping.

C: Yeah, this is clothes shopping.

T: And your seventh grade clothes magically aren’t good enough for eighth grade??

*P and C simultaneously*

P: No, of course not.

C: Honey, don’t be silly.

T: it's going on your credit card. I don't even want to see this bill.

C: sure..., I got it

*knowing it all gets paid by the same joint bank account anyway*