#sigh... just feeling overwhelmed and a lil down on the dumps man

[dynjay]

shit man, I'm going to be so checked out from the holidays this year

[lovelylusts]

Stop the World || Alex Turner || Request

Pairing: Post-TBHC!Alex x Virgin!Reader

Genre: fluff, smut

Warnings: first time/loss of virginity, vaginal fingering, cute lil petnames like doll, handjob, protected vaginal sex (wrap it before you tap it plz), where can i find a man like this?

Word Count: 2.9k

A/N: pre-rona times obviously. thank you for your patience, my dear anon! i hope this was worth the wait!

In which your first sleepover with your boyfriend of 7 months leads to your first time.

There were no words in the English language that could really describe your past few months with Alex. All of your boyfriends before him were terrible - self-centered, only ever talked about themselves, cheaters - but Alex was so different from them that you were nearly convinced he wasn’t human. He was always a gentleman, always ensuring that he would respect whatever boundaries you set in place - whether it be discomfort with PDA, or having to tell him you were not yet ready to take the “next step” in your relationship, he was always respectful towards you.

And that brings you to your first time spending the night at Alex’s house, roughly seven months into dating. To say you were nervous would be an understatement - you knew that you were ready for whatever may happen once you two were under the covers of his queen-sized bed, but you couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming amount of butterflies arising in your stomach as you neared his house, your overnight bag sitting in the passenger seat beside you and you gripped your steering wheel. You took the familiar turn into the driveway to the gate that led to the high-class neighbourhood in which he lived, filled with white two-story houses that were a bit too close together for your liking, pressing the four-digit code into the keypad before driving into his neighbourhood towards his house. As the distance between his house and your car closed, the butterflies in your stomach fluttered more and more rapidly, until you parked your car in his driveway and your chest felt heavy.

It’s just one night, you thought to yourself. Everything will be ok.

You dragged yourself out of the driver’s seat of your car, walking around to gather your bag of belongings from the passenger’s side before trekking towards his front door. Your hands were shaking lightly, your head feeling a bit fuzzy, and you began to fear that your nerves would ruin your quality time with your beloved boyfriend. But when you saw him open the front door, presumably after hearing your car door be slammed shut, you felt your nerves begin to melt away - not all of them, but you definitely felt a lot better than you did during your car ride.

“Hey, baby,” he greeted as he neared you to take your bag from you, his long hair tied in a messy bun with a few loose hairs flowing in the cool breeze. “How was your day?”

You were relieved that he wasn’t bringing up any of the pressures you felt regarding your night with him, and that he was going about conversation in his regular manner - whether or not he could sense your tenseness, you weren’t sure, but you still appreciated the normalcy. You carried on the conversation as he led you inside his house, which you always thought was a bit too big for just one person, and smiled as he turned to face you and bring you into his arms. You were enveloped in his warmth and distinct cinnamon-like scent, nestling your face closer to him as if you were scared of losing grasp on this feeling.

He always made you feel so warm inside.

Your afternoon together went as per usual, with him listening to your gossip about co-workers, and you listening to new demos and song ideas that he had come up with in the gaps between visits. But as the night drew closer and closer, and you stood behind him with your arms wrapped around his torso as he prepared dinner, you felt your nerves come back. You prayed that he couldn’t sense the sudden tenseness in your body, or the mild shaking of your hands.

“What’s wrong, love? You feel tense,” he said, concern laced in his tone of voice.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” you lied in response, hoping that he wouldn’t ask any further questions.

“You sure?” he asked, as if he could see right through your lie. He moved over to dump the pasta into the strainer that sat in the sink before turning to look at you as he spoke, leaning against the counter. “Seriously, what’s going on? Are you nervous to spend the night with me?”

“I…” You lowered your head in shame, staring at your minor scuffed boots. “Yeah. I am.”

“Love, you know I won’t do anything you’re not comfortable with, right? We don’t have to do anything like that if you don’t want to.”

“The thing is that I want to. I really want to. But I’m just scared, because, y’know, it’ll be my first time doing any of that stuff, and I don’t wanna mess it up,” you admitted, unable to look at your boyfriend as you feared his reaction to what you deemed an overreaction.

“It’s fine to be nervous. If you’re really ready to take that step, then I promise I’ll be gentle,” he said. He turned away from you to divide the pasta into two bowls and cover them with meat sauce before placing them at the table - again, the table was quite big for somebody who lived alone, but you figured it was because he had company over quite often. You two tried to move past the awkward conversation from the kitchen, instead going over your respective work affairs with laughter and smiles.

By the time the sun had completely set, you were both immersed in watching a random sci-fi movie that he picked from his extensive movie collection, though your mind was noticeably elsewhere, your eyes on the screen, though you were not processing a single thing that happened. You were weighing your options, going through each pro and each con of sleeping with Alex that night: you could either wait and just put off your nerves, or you could do it now and not have to worry about it in the future.

“Alex, love, I think I want to get it over with,” you said. You could feel him tense up beside you, though he quickly relaxed himself so as to not worry you.

“Are you 100% sure?” he asked. “I don’t want you to feel pressured.”

You swallowed, trying to breath slowly and deeply to calm your racing heart. “Yes. I want to do it.”

He reached forward to grab the tv remote from the coffee table, the screen going black at the push of a button, before he stood up and reached out his hand to assist you in standing beside him so he could walk with you towards his bedroom.

The room followed a neutral theme with paintings depicting a variety of different autumnal nature scenes, and a few fake plants littered the window sill. He had a king-sized bed with very simple beige bedding, a few throw pillows centered on the mattress decorated with various stitched patterns in varying colors to stand out against the monochromatic setting surrounding. Unsure as to what you were supposed to do, you turned to face him as he approached you and wrapped his arms around your waist, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“Are you sure you’re ready?” he asked, his already thick Sheffield accent growing thicker and his voice had become a bit deeper, softer.

“I am,” you nodded, looking deep into his dark brown eyes, seeing that his pupils had blown out as your eye contact continued on, before you felt him walking you backwards towards the bed until your knees hit the mattress, causing you to fall backwards onto the thick comforter. 

You watched as he unbuttoned his off-white button up, untucking it from his chocolate brown trousers and tossing it off somewhere, followed by the plain white wife beater he wore beneath it. You assumed you should follow after him and began to remove your own clothes, unbuttoning your blouse and throwing it to the side, followed by your pants.

“You’re so beautiful, doll,” he awed, a small smirk forming on his lips as he dropped his trousers to his ankles before stepping out of them. You could see that he was hard beneath his black boxers, and evidently he was quite big, which made you feel a bit nervous, but you calmed yourself by reminding yourself that he would take care of you. “I promise I’ll be careful, ok?”

“Ok,” you sighed out, your voice a bit shaky as he climbed on top of your nearly bare figure, pressing a kiss to your lips as he trailed his right hand down to play with the hem of your underwear right next to your heat. You felt the familiar tingle of arousal between your thighs as his fingers neared your sex, until you felt the pads of his fingers rubbing against your sensitive clit over your black underwear. You whined, bucking your hips against his hand and begging for him to further. “Please, I want your fingers. Please, Alex.”

Alex smirked against your lips, his hand pushing past the top hem of your panties until he was met with your soaking core, running his fingers through your arousal before bringing them back up to your clit to begin rubbing small circles over it. He kissed your neck softly as he listened intently to your sweet moans, taking in how your hips slightly rocked against his hand and your chest heaved. You felt a finger prodding at your tight entrance before slowly pushing in, your walls contracting at the odd intrusion - it was only something you had experienced on your own, but this was the first time somebody else had touched you this way. You never wanted to forget the feeling of his long finger thrusting against the soft spot within your walls. Ever.

“How does that feel?” he asked in a husky voice.

“S-so good,” you moaned out. “M-more. Another finger. Please, Alex.”

A second finger slid into your tight hole, a slight burn accompanying the stretch, but it wasn’t something you were completely unfamiliar with due to your own exploration through late nights on your own. His thumb still toyed with your clit as he thrusted his middle and ring finger against the internal sweet spot, leaving open-mouthed kisses, and every so often a hickey, on the skin of your jaw, neck, and collar.

You finally felt comfortable moving your own hand towards his body, a moment of confusion evident in the way he faltered for a bit before he realized what your intentions were, letting out a low groan as he felt your hand wrap around his hard member.

The two of you lied there, wrapped in each other’s warmth as you worked in tandem to prepare for the main event. You both momentarily forgot that you would be losing your virginity that night, though you were shortly reminded when a third finger plunged into you. Your thighs were shaking, the familiar knot growing in your stomach (notable quicker than when you were on your own.

“Alex… I think I’m gonna cum,” you whisper, unable to raise your voice in fears of being embarrassingly loud.

“Come on, sweetheart,” he coaxed. “Cum around my fingers.”

He groaned as he felt your walls tighten around his fingers, the motions of your hand around his cock pausing as you cried out his name, shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body as you came harder than ever before.

“You look so beautiful when you cum,” he said, pulling his hand out of your underwear and removing your own hand from his. “It’s not too late to change your mind.”

“I want you, Alex. I’m ready, I promise,” you said, still breathless from your orgasm. Although you were weak, you were still able to remove your bra and underwear; now your bare body was on full display as he worked on removing his own underwear, his large cock springing out from the cloth confines. From jerking him off, you could already tell he was well endowed, but now that you could actually see the member, your worries came back.

Is he gonna fit? How badly is this gonna hurt? Should I still go through with this?

“Doll,” he calls out, interrupting your train of thought. “We don’t have to do this.”

“I-I want to. I’m just nervous it’ll hurt,” you admit, leaning on your elbows and looking up at him, trying not to be distracted by his bare state.

“I prepped you, but if you’re nervous, I can do some more,” he suggested as he walked over the the nightstand beside you, opening the singular drawer from the dark wooden table, grabbing a silver packet - obviously a condom - from the disorganized drawer, before looking at you with concern.

“No need. I’m just nervous. Were you nervous your first time?” you asked with curiosity.

“Of course I was. But, I was also a horny teenager who was desperate to knock boots, so… Are you sure?”

You nodded quickly, watching as he tore the condom wrapper over and placed the piece of latex over his member before he climbed on top of you, holding himself up on his forearms. His member was resting against your lower abdomen, his lips pressing soft kisses to your next as he tried to soothe your worries. Before you knew it, he was grabbing his cock and lining it up with your entrance, asking you once again if you were ready, before proceeding to push forward. You cringed at the intrusion, a whimper leaving your swollen lips upon feeling the burning stretch of your walls as he pushed his hips closer towards your own, his thick length filling the tight virgin canal.

“You doin’ ok, doll?” he asked through a grunt. It wasn’t necessarily an unfamiliar sensation for him; however, it had been a while since he had been intimate with somebody on this level, and he had not been with a virgin in quite some time. Your walls felt so warm around him, so tight, and in that moment he felt so lucky that he had the high amounts of self-control that he did, because the last thing he wanted to do was hurt you.

“Y-yeah,” you whisper with a tremble, and you could feel the sting of tears forming in your eyes; you attempted to blink them away, but they only hazed your vision and trickled down your temples onto the Egyptian cotton pillowcase. “Keep going.”

He nodded at your wish, kissing you gently to distract from the ever growing pain between your thighs, whispering to you to keep breathing and stopping every few pushes to make sure you were reading to continue. He eventually bottomed out, and you felt as if you were able to finally breathe normally, melting into his touch as he brought a hand to your face to wipe the tears off of your flushed face.

“You’re doing good,” he praised. “Let me know when you want me to move, ok?” He ran a large hand through your hair, kissing you all over your face as you calmed down.

“I’m ready, Alex. Make love to me,” you pleaded to him, grabbing his biceps to brace yourself for the upcoming main. He slowly began to pull his hips away from yours, steadily dragging his cock out of your sopping heat before he pushed forward again at a matching pace, intently watching your reactions to make sure he wasn’t hurting you too badly. The pain was unlike anything you had experienced before, but you welcomed it with open arms and the knowledge that it would soon fade into something more desirable. So you waited. You waited with tears until the pain subsided, whimpers and sobs of pain derailing into breathy moans and cries of his name as you held him so closely that he felt as if you feared letting him go.

You felt as if you had reached the ultimate euphoria as you felt him thrust into you, though you were certain he was not going as hard as he normally would in fear of harming you - he was always so gentle with you, and he wanted to take care of you now more than ever so as to not make your first time unpleasurable.

He felt as if you two were made for each other in every sense of the word - it was the way your hands fit perfectly together, the way your lips felt against his, the way your laughter made him feel as if his heart was going to grow so large it’d explode, the way your small sounds of pleasure filled his ears as he filled you in a way he hadn’t filled anyone else.

The familiar knot was slowly tying itself in your core as he began to speed up his thrusts, the burn had subsided completely and now you felt as if you were weightless and floating as he pleasured you. Then his fingers had once again made their way between your bodies to make contact with your clit, rubbing circles in the same manner as before. Many soft sounds filled the room, such as his low grunts, and your quiet whimpers, and the bed creaking ever-so-slightly as he rocked his body against yours.

“I’m close,” you whisper against his skin as you wrapped your legs around his lower torso, the knot now too noticeable to ignore. Your orgasm washed over you almost instantaneously, your body shaking as you came so hard that you swore you saw inverted stars against the white-hot flashes behind your closed eyes, a loud cry of his name leaving your hips as he overstimulated you.

“Fuck,” he moaned out, the constricting of your walls bringing him closer to the edge; and before he knew it, he too was finishing, filling the condom with his hot seed. He rolled off of you, collapsing on the bed beside you as he came down from the intense orgasm. “Well… how was that?” he asked after the brief moment of silence.

“It was… amazing. Thank you, Alex.”

“Why are you thanking me?”

“Because I can.”

[teyvattherapist]

Episodic

My sister and I had a long talk about how we both suffer from dissociation earlier today cause of an ask I got. And I got inspired to write a lil smth. This is based off of my experiences for the most part so anywayss.

tags: gn!doctor!reader + Kaeya, feat Diluc + Venti, dissociation, Kaeya story spoilers, Diluc story spoilers, mental health in general.

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Lies, so many lies, that’s all he was made up of! A liar, a cheat, a fraud, a dirty traitor. Years ago, well into his teens, he wouldn’t have cared. He didn’t give a damn whether or not the nation burned to the ground, he didn’t care if Teyvat as they knew it was ripped away from them and destroyed. But he was older now, and he cared so much. Oh too much. Torn between loyalties, his royal family who abandoned him to help them or the nation that loved and raised him. The lies stacked up, the nightly duties, the work within the shadows, the information he gave to his informants.

The lies were bearing down on him, he was being crushed, lungs screaming for air. It was almost like he was drowning except the ice above his head stopped him from surfacing for air. Kaeya Alberich could swim but he was not strong enough to shatter inches of thick ice. Every drop of water that filled his lungs, every lie that he needed to keep track of, they all froze over eventually. He was heavy, his body felt heavy, his shoulders hurt, and taking in air was a chore. He wished he’d just drown, but he kept scrambling, slamming against the ice, would anybody come-

“Are you even listening?” Diluc sighed, setting the glass down on the bar counter loud enough it shattered Kaeya’s thoughts and he lifted his head from his hand, star pupil blown as he looked around quickly. Diluc raised an eyebrow at the reaction, not expecting it from the ever composed cavalry captain he once called brother. The bar was relatively empty, Venti was asleep at a table tucked in the back. You were leaning against the wall while you did some work at the bar. Kaeya’s breathing was shaky, he realised as he tried to intake air, fill his lungs, stuff down the suffocation.

“Kaeya?” You set your quill down, concern quickly taking over your features. Diluc grabbed the glass Kaeya had been drinking from, opting to dump whatever remained. Kaeya didn’t even react to Diluc’s actions, instead he opted to look at his hands, opening and closing them, he did the action with his palms up and then repeated while looking at the back of his hands. Being a doctor for the knights, dissociation wasn’t the hardest thing for you to recognise. Approaching the situation, however, that was what became difficult.

“I don’t know how much longer I can endure this.” Kaeya’s voice was so weak, like he was testing out a tongue that didn’t belong to him. You stood immediately, Kaeya turning to you in surprise from the sudden action. You held your hands out and Kaeya looked at your waiting hands, he blinked and then looked up to you where he received a quick nod in return, a reassuring smile on your face. Kaeya put his hands into your own, his hands were surprisingly warm even through your gloves, slender fingers curling to intertwine with yours.

You gave his hands a gentle squeeze, he could feel two different sets of eyes staring at him outside of you directly in front of him. The weight of the world was so heavy and he felt himself slipping beneath the current again, it was relentless, endless, it dragged him down, the frozen lake was so dark- “Describe how my hands feel, please. What do my gloves feel like? Temperature?” You did your best to keep your voice reassuring, exceptionally kind as you crouched slightly so you could be at eye height with Kaeya who continued to sit.

The words dragged him to the surface and he struggled to remember who he was beyond all of these damn lies. There were so many lies, so much to hide, so many ties and loyalties oh how they swirled in his head. But he had to focus on the feelings of the gloves, thankful his seemed to be fingerless. “Cotton, your gloves feel like cotton.” He got a reassuring squeeze, an affirmative. Diluc snuck out from the bar, heading to the tavern door to lock it, sure an hour early, but given the circumstances.

“Okay, anything else?”

“Cold.”

“Haha, very good. Do you know your name?”

“Kaeya Ragnvindr. No, wait..” He trailed off, eyebrow furrowing. “I changed it, Alberich.” You quickly nodded, prompting him to continue. “You smell like mint and I smell like wine. Or is that the redhead? I’m not sure.”

“Both, probably.” Diluc responded casually, as if his heart didn’t just shatter hearing Kaeya say his old last name as his own once more. How long had it been since Diluc tore that family name from the navy haired captain? Diluc got closer, standing behind you, enough distance from Kaeya not to overwhelm him, but close enough he could watch.

The water still lapped at his legs, threatening, stabbing into him and trying to drag him back in. But he clawed at the sand, finding hold in the frost covered shore. “Are you back with us then, Kaeya? If not, you could try describing one of us.” You squeezed his hands again and Kaeya slowly nodded, his brain fog was lifting at least, he wasn’t entirely focused on the frozen lake anymore. When had he broken through the ice?

“Whoa, sorry- What happened there?” Kaeya pulled his hands back suddenly, gripping his head in one hand and shaking it with his signature laugh. Diluc had been frowning the entire time, and your reassuring smile vanished in an instant at his new words. “What? Don’t look at me like that, it’s embarrassing.” Kaeya smiled, turning his head to survey the rest of the empty tavern.

“You were having a dissociative episode. I’d offer a mora for your thoughts but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out why.” You stood straight again and Kaeya wished you weren’t on his blind side, that way he’d be able to see without turning towards you, instead the cavalry captain eyed the sleeping Venti in the corner. “I’m not going to ask you to talk to me, but at least talk to Diluc about what’s on your mind if nobody else. It will only get worse from here.” You moved by the redhead who made no objections, and you began to gather the paperwork you had been working on.

“I promise, I’m fine. You’re worrying over nothing. And you, Diluc. I didn’t expect such concern.”

“We grew up together. Of course I’m concerned. You’re one of the few competent knights, and they need you to be on your best.” Diluc had his arms crossed over his chest, but he genuinely was trying not to seem so malicious, despite the biting words of his former brother. “How often has this been happening?” Diluc inquired, waiting for Kaeya to actually look back at them, but he never did, calloused fingers gently tapping the wooden bar countertop instead. “Okay, when did it start, then?” Diluc switched questions with a nod from you.

“A few months ago. They only lasted a minute or two, and I’d barely remember what happened. Recently the times I’ve blanked have been longer. I don’t remember what happened since coming in here.” Kaeya’s voice was quiet, low, ashamed maybe. He was so tired of it all, the lies and the burdens. He didn’t want to be a plot point or a chess piece. He just wanted to live his life, free of the whispering secrets of the dark.

“That was seven hours ago. [Name], is that normal?”

“Quite. Some dissociative episodes have been known to last years. The hours will turn to days, days into weeks. You know how it goes. I’ll bring Venti home so you two can speak.” You pulled your bag over your shoulder, heading off to grab the drunk bard from the corner. “Come on, bard. You can stay at my house.” You lifted the man easily, letting Diluc silently unlock and open the tavern door for you. The door was shut and locked once more.

“You don’t have to pretend to care, Diluc. I’m fine.” Kaeya pushed his barstool back, standing to his full height. He was exhausted, his brain fog may have been gone but his body still didn’t feel real and every step he took felt like walking on pins and needles. It didn’t help when Diluc blocked the door though, the usual bored expression replaced with something else.

“I do care, idiot. Whether or not you believe that isn’t my problem. You’re still my brother, even if we never shared any blood. Now you’re going to sit down and we’re going to talk about what happened that night, do you hear me?” Diluc lowered his arms, gaze dropping to anywhere but the captain. “Please, just talk to me. I won’t push you away this time.”

“Do you promise?”

“Obviously.”

[kyber-queen]

Cold Feet (Din Djarin x F!reader)

Summary: Reader is a badass medic/bounty hunter who happens to be hopelessly in love with her stoic, metal-clad shipmate. Lil bit of jealous Din, some good old bed sharing, and a little bit of fluff :)

Rating: Everyone

Word Count: 2k ope

Warnings: mentions of food and drink, brief mentions of surgery, mentions of alcohol

Author’s Note: Hi guys!! This is my first fic so I’d really appreciate it if you gave it a read and some feedback. I might be writing a part two to this but we’ll see. Enjoy!!

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You had only been on this ice planet for two rotations, but the chill had already crept its way into your insides. Your bones ached and your joints creaked, and you wondered how the little green child you had been tasked with managing seemed entirely unaffected by the unforgiving cold. You and the kid had holed up quite nicely for the past two days, bundling yourselves in blankets and tucking the child away into its pod, which had been outfitted with a temperature regulation system. Lucky bastard. While it slept peacefully inside its cradle, you had used up nearly all of the water reserve on the Crest. You’d been taking hour-long trips to the refresher, the scalding water providing little relief from the dull, cold ache that gnawed at your shivering limbs. Mando previously explained that successfully catching this bounty would take four rotations, give or take, and you had been too exhausted to ask questions or remember to replenish your food and water reserve. Now, your supplies were running low and you were dreading the mile-long walk into town to restock.

You strapped traction spikes onto your sturdiest boots and wrapped yourself in your warmest layers, stealing one of Mando’s old cloaks for good measure. Once you checked to make sure the child was asleep and comfortable in its pod, you set off across the frozen landscape. Ice rose like a parted sea to your left and right, and in the distance, you saw the gentle flicker of a lantern in the window of a dome-shaped structure. You picked up the pace as you walked; dusk was upon you and although you knew you could take care of yourself, you feared what could be hiding inside the many caves that marked the surrounding ice-walls.

You were an herbalist by trade, first catching Mando’s eye with your skill in preparing poisons. You had taken out two trandoshans with two quick, well-aimed throws of a dart tipped with your poison of choice—it was fast acting and non-lethal, and Mando in his curiosity and awe was just distracted enough for the third trandoshan to slip a dagger through the gap in his beskar. You finished off the third trandoshan easily enough, and Mando quickly became acquainted with your second skill set. You dragged him back to his ship, prepared a hemostatic tincture, stripped him of his beskar chest plate, and stitched up a two-inch laceration to his spleen. You insisted on staying with him until you could confirm that his wound had healed, but it had been three months and the two of you had reached a sort of mutual understanding. You cared for the child and assisted on bounties, and he gave you free room and board and an overly generous 30% of the bounty profit. Somewhere between bandaging his wounds, assisting him on bounties, and caring for his child, you had noticed a certain tightness in your chest whenever your hand brushed his. You would find yourself seeking out his company more and more, relishing in quiet conversation as he piloted you through the stars. You were falling. Hard. And you knew even on the off chance that he returned a fraction of the feelings you were developing for him, it could never happen. You’d never see his face or know his name. It was stupid, really. You were business partners, together purely out of convenience. You needed to get this silly crush out of your system before you managed to screw up the tentative friendship the two of you had grown.

Once you haggled for rations and water, you made up your mind that you would go to the nearest cantina and spend the rest of your credits on forgetting your troubles for a while. Although your plodding pace didn’t seem to carry you any further towards the lantern in the window, you were now only a few yards away from the village outpost. You quickened your stride, rushing into the hemispherical stone building and relishing in the warmth that overwhelmed you as the door slammed shut against the cold. You had been so lost in your thoughts you had nearly forgotten to shiver. You leaned casually over the counter to begin your haggling, the man behind it matching your sorry attempt at negotiating lower prices stride for stride. He was handsome, with an easy smile and a voice that rumbled deep from within his chest.

“I’ll do thirty portions, at three quarters of a credit each, but that’s the highest I can go,” you stated confidently. You fiddled with the ring on your right hand, hoping he couldn’t tell just how little experience you had at this.

The man, Linor, grinned. “I think we can arrange that—but only if you join me for a drink after this. I’ll throw in the water rations on the house.”

A drink couldn’t hurt, right? You were planning on headed to the bar anyways.

“It’s a deal, then,” you smiled, reaching out to shake his hand.

“It’s a deal,”.

**********************

You were four drinks in, and you were finally feeling warm. Your laughs bubbled in your throat, and the raucous atmosphere of the cantina dulled the cold ache that had settled in your bones. The room had taken on a soft, undulating glow, and your cheeks were flushed and gleaming. Linor was an excellent conversationalist, but the pair of you had been at the cantina for three hours, and you could tell he was itching to take you back to his ship. His hand had migrated from the top of your knee to your upper thigh, and when you laughed his eyes lingered on your parted lips for just a moment too long. You crossed your legs, effectively removing his hand from your thigh, and cleared your throat.

“What time is it? I promised my friend I’d be home by midnight,” a white lie, of course, but Linor didn’t need to know that.

“It’s quarter to eleven—comm them, let ‘em know you’ll be late. You’re coming to my place, right?” You didn’t like the sound of Linor’s tone, it was too confident, too demanding. His hand was back on your upper thigh as well, this time a rough squeeze jarring you fully back to reality. The more aware you became of your situation, the more you mentally kicked yourself for letting yourself end up in the cantina in the first place. You had left the baby in its pod, for maker’s sake. What if someone raided the ship, or the pod shut off, or the child got sick, or—

“Actually, she was just leaving,” a rough voice explained from behind you. A familiar voice. Mando.

You turned quickly to face him, and nearly wobbled off your stool. Maybe you had more to drink than you thought. You gave him a lazy once-over, letting your gaze linger on his armored form, and aptly assessed that he didn’t have the bounty with him.

“Didja get the bounty?”

“He’s in the carbonite freezer on the ship, the baby’s asleep. Let’s go,” He sounded pissed.

You stood from your stool, and promptly tripped face-first into his beskar chest-plate. You definitely had more to drink than you thought. You issued an insincere apology to Linor, who was making some very intense eye contact with the wood grain of the bar. As much as you hated to say it, you loved the effect Mando had on people. Tall, confident Linor wouldn’t even look him in the eye. Mando could be downright scary, and the best part was that he didn’t even seem to realize it. You enjoyed your little train of thought for a moment, until you circled back to the fact that his scary-bounty-hunter-tone was directed at you. His visor had not left your face the entire time you were lost in thought. You wobbled again, against your will.

“You’re drunk,”. His head tilted, the black t of his helmet fixating on your flushed face. He sighed, muttered something about talking about this in the morning, and scooped one arm under your knees and another at the small of your back. He carried you back out into the cold and you shuddered involuntarily as he dumped you onto the cold metal of the speeder. He shuffled in behind you on the speeder, his armored thighs bracketing yours. You lost your balance yet again, and as you steadied yourself against Mando’s chest you were suddenly very grateful that he had seated you in front of him rather than behind. He fired up the engine, and the two of you flew across the frozen landscape back to the ship.

If you thought you were cold before, now you were freezing. The wind bit at your exposed face, and despite bundling yourself in Mando’s old cloak, the icy air slipped in between the grain of the fabric and sapped the residual warmth from your limbs. You shifted further back into Mando’s chest, fixating on the rumble of the engine as you approached the Crest. The speeder skidded to a stop, and Mando slid off and fiddled with his vambrace for a moment before giving you a quiet, “C’mere,” and carrying you through the cold into the Crest. He carried you right past your little blanket pile and set you down in a corner of the ship. He punched a few more buttons on his vambrace, and a door opened behind you, revealing a small room with a bed and—was that a heated blanket?

“It’s warmer in here, I’ll take the cot,” Mando explained.

“Hey, no. Wait, is this your room? I’m not gonna steal your bed,” you crossed your arms defiantly, leaning back on the wall for support.

“I’m asking you to,” his voice betrayed a hint of exasperation, and you remembered the long, exhausting day he most definitely had. “Look, you’re shivering. If you freeze to death in that cot the kid’ll never forgive me,”.

You sensed you were fighting a losing battle.

“But if you freeze to death in that cot, the kid’ll never forgive me,” you mentally patted yourself on the back for that excellent stroke of logic.

“I’ll be fine, just go—”

“Why don’t we just share? Body heat, right?” Did you really just say that? You were sober enough to know that you definitely should have kept your mouth shut. You probably just made him uncomfortable, what if it was against his creed? You were mentally kicking yourself for the second time tonight.

Mando paused a moment before responding.

“Alright—the helmet stays on, though,” He was already stripping himself of his beskar, but his mechanical movements betrayed his exhaustion.

“Wouldn’t expect anything less,” You made your way over to the bed, shucking off your shoes and quickly slipping under the covers. The thin mattress was softer than the cot, but barely. Was being comfortable against the Way?

You were still trying to wrap your head around the fact that tipsy you would be sharing a bed with the man you’d been crushing on for months. With your luck, you’d probably drool on him in your sleep. Mando hit the lights, and moments later you felt a depression on the other side of the mattress, and Mando’s warm, solid body against your back. You scooted further back against him, and as if on instinct, he draped his arm around your waist. You were finally comfortable—you felt warmer than you had at the cantina. You were quickly drifting off to sleep, and by the sound of Mando’s modulated breathing, he was out like a light. A slight snore from under the helmet confirmed your suspicions. The man was like a generator. He practically radiated heat, and you suddenly felt less guilty that you hadn’t taken the cot like you had originally insisted on. You bent your knees, slipping your cold toes in between his calves.

CLANG

His helmet hit the durasteel wall, and you felt his entire body jolt.

“Why the fuck are your feet so cold?”

[prettywordsyouleft]

To Be Continued - Part 10

Summary: As an author, you had created Brian Kang for your current trilogy series to represent the ultimate man that everyone would love, along with Charli Evers - your female protagonist. What you hadn’t expected was for him to find a way out of the story and begin shaping up your world instead

Pairing: Brian Kang x female writer (ft. Park Sungjin)

Genre: writer au / romance / fantasy

Warnings: fictional characters coming to life / a bit of angst here and there / Sungjin as a cop (or does that only affect me?) >_>

Word count: 2487

Preview | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | Epilogue

The broken laptop was taken by Sungjin that night, and he returned it to you a fortnight later with a new screen on it. Despite being grateful, you were still hopeless. “Brian’s gone for good, isn’t he?”

“Maybe it’s time for you to move on from him, Y/N. I hate seeing you this stuck. Don’t you want to write other stories and start living again?”

Staring up at the man, you nodded numbly. “I hoped I’d be living with him. I guess dreaming up the perfect guy isn’t a healthy thing to do.”

“It did happen, and your grief is validated,” he told you, giving your upper arm a gentle squeeze. “Everyone faces a loss of someone in their life at one point or another. And we have to learn how to continue on after they’re gone.”

“You’re right,” you murmured, smiling gently at Sungjin. “Thank you for being a good friend to me.”

“Officially friend-zoned,” Sungjin teased, dramatically grappling at his heart. You giggled, and this made him stop and smile. “And officially hearing a good sound come from you. I hope you can feel comfortable to laugh more often, Y/N.”

“Thank you for everything you’ve done.”

“Now that you have your device back, how about you go and write something? I’m sure it’s been a long two weeks.”

You grinned at his statement, nodding along. “My desktop is so ancient. I was close to spending a lot of money on a new one.”

“Well, now you don’t have to. Off you go and write, Miss Writer.”

Your smile fell as soon as you shut the door, the friendly term Sungjin just called you only bringing up the moments where Brian had called you that time and time again. Counting to ten, you avoided crying for the first time over your loss and smiled.

“All I have to do is keep counting and writing,” you instructed, marching down to your office and plugged in the laptop. It fired up immediately, and the new screen was pristine. Thankfully, all of your work was backed up to an external so you didn’t have to worry about losing your work. It surprised you, however, that the computer remembered where it last was in your session, the end of the Eternity document appearing in front of you.

Reading over the paragraph you had sent Brian, you wrapped your arms around yourself for comfort. “You did well, Y/N. You waited for love, and you loved him like no other. This story’s over now, though. Let’s move on.”

Slowly, you deleted your message, making sure the document said The End and closed out of it, moving it to another storage space on your external hard-drive before opening a new document.

It was time to step out of the limbo you had endured for too long.

“Lily, did you get my first submission?” you asked as you continued to tap furiously at your keyboard, not bothering to check the expression of your editor on the small window in the corner of your screen.

“I did, and it’s fabulous.”

“Just fabulous?” you asked, scrunching your up face in annoyance. “I don’t think fabulous is enough.”

“Ooh, someone is feeling good about her work lately,” Lily crooned, and you grinned. “It’s good to see you working this happily again, Y/N.

“Well, the Encounter series is done now, and I need to have a follow-up story.”

“Does your favourite constable know about this?” she wondered dreamily, and you stopped typing to shoot Lily a look. “What? I distinctively remember you swooning over your protector. There’s no hope for you two to have a romance behind the scenes too?”

“Lily, I might be a writer who enjoys a good love story, but that’s all it remains as for me, a story. Sungjin is my friend, and I’ll surprise him with the final manuscript when this is done.”

“Yes boss!” she cheered and then gasped. “Oh, by the way! I heard that pre-order sales for Eternity have surpassed Captivated! When it launches in two week’s time, I’m certain you’re going to rank well!”

“And then that world will finally be at a close,” you murmured to yourself, Lily straining to hear what your lips had expressed. When you noticed her confusion, you smiled brightly. “Thanks for all your hard work over the past three years on this project, Lil.”

“You wrote them, Y/N. That world, especially Eternity, is a masterpiece.”

“Well, I hope the next story will be even better. More than fabulous, even.”

“You never let a single thing slide. I’ll sing your praises further when you send me the chapter you’re working on right now!”

“Onto it!” you said with a wave of goodbye, and the video call ended.

Slumping in your chair, your eyes shifted towards the wall calendar where the date had been circled for Eternity’s release.

You had taken Sungjin’s advice and picked yourself up out of the dumps. Of course, it hadn’t been easy, and still to this day you had moments where you yearned for Brian. However, you had remained strong since your initial resolve and left Eternity where it belonged – in your completed archive. You hadn’t sent messages, you didn’t open the document, and aside from when obligated to, you didn’t speak of that world to anyone. It still hurt too much, and you were looking forward to a time where this was all just a fond memory in your writing career.

Right now, with the impending sales and then signing tour that was booked, however, you were doing your best to distract yourself from anything that might make you cave.

Writing your police officer au was definitely helping with that, and you launched into typing again about Sungjin and Ella, you two protagonists.

You knew you probably should change his name, but the story made the most sense to you when you imagined your friend. Although you did wonder how you could separate the two when it came to the more romantic parts in the novel, you were having a lot of fun, remembering those juvenile feelings you once had for Sungjin before Brian stepped out of the laptop and changed your life entirely.

Sigh. You had thought of Brian again.

“When will I stop doing that?” you wondered in a sing-song voice, trying to keep upbeat. It was then that a new document popped up on the screen, and you groaned loudly. “And when will you stop glitching?”

It wasn’t the first time the new document tab would appear, now and then when you were in the midst of typing. You assumed you kept hitting the keyboard shortcut for opening it somehow and mentally wrote yourself a note to check if it could be disabled when you were done with this chapter.

Paying it no mind, you continued writing your story, not thinking once about all the mysterious happenings that preluded Brian’s appearance in the first place.

“Wow, I can’t believe I’m meeting you today!” a young voice announced, and you smiled brightly at the teen before you. “I’m a big fan of Brian and Charli!”

“Aren’t we all?” you mentioned happily back, reaching for the copy of Eternity she had placed down to sign. “What’s your name?”

“It’s Jennie! With an i-e.”

“Well, Jennie, with an i-e, I’m so glad you came today. I hope to see you at my next book signing in a couple of year’s time.”

“You can count on it, Y/N!”

The day continued much in the same, and whilst you were overwhelmed by the support of your fans, when you entered your hotel for the evening, you were more than emotionally exhausted.

“Stupid Charli. She’s living the dream,” you muttered and then caught yourself, sighing heavily with your unexpected negativity.

It was foolish to be jealous, and yet after listening to everyone say how perfect Brian and Charli were for each other all day long, you understood your reaction. Even if you were moving on, you wanted to be the one who was perfect for Brian Kang.

“Let’s count to ten, shall we?” you told yourself, breathing deeply and following through with your mantra. After ordering room service for dinner, you settled into the plush bed with your laptop, ready to stream a crime show you had been watching for research.

When the screen appeared though, it was opened on Microsoft Word with a new document waiting for you. You groaned and looked into the settings to make sure you had in fact disabled the keyboard shortcut. It was as you had left it and you let out a small huff at the program before hovering your cursor over the exit button.

Something in you made you pause, however, and you peered at the empty document with some interest. “Why are you following me around?”

Thinking of how Brian would always open a new document to converse with you, a glimmer of hope surged through, and you hit the keys with a rapid pace.

Are you there, Brian Kang?

Nothing came, and your words didn’t dissolve either. Rolling your eyes at your rash reaction, you closed the document and opened Netflix.

You were well into the throes of the show when your room service knocked on the door, casting you out of bed and over to the door. Once you returned with the tray of food you had been given, you noticed the document was back on the screen again.

“What is going on?” you wondered, staring at it for some time. Placing a hand on the screen, you closed your eyes and willed Brian to come out. It had been so long since you had done this, and yet your fervour was stronger than ever. You prayed so hard that when you opened your eyes and saw nothing there, your tears were immediately at the surface, cascading down your cheeks.

“I’m so over pining for you. Either come back or leave me alone!” you wailed, pushing the laptop aside and curling up into a ball.

You didn’t see it then, but the cursor started to move as if someone was holding down the space button, creating ten pages before it stopped.

The tour ended, and you were all too grateful to wake up back home with Binks curled up beside you. Kissing your furbaby until he made it apparent that your affection was unwanted, you climbed out of bed to brew yourself some coffee.

Today, you felt free. The saga of Eternity was over and whilst you knew you would still have to do a couple more interviews here and there in the future where you would be asked about the series, and your Discord would still be hit up regularly about reviews over the final story in the trilogy, today you were at least free from the contractual sides of the story. You wouldn’t have to actively talk about Charli Evers and Brian Kang ever again.

You also hoped that one day, once your pain resolved enough, that you could reread the series and remember why you had loved it all along, instead of the jealousy and burden you felt towards it right now.

With coffee and toast held in either hand, you bounced off to your office and sat down at your desk, blinking when you found your laptop on your desk already.

Had you pulled it out of its bag last night when you got home?

Shrugging, you hit the power button and were surprised when it immediately loaded up your home screen. “I did turn you off, you finicky device.”

Lots of little things had happened since getting the screen fixed, and you had left it down to that incident messing with it. You didn’t have it in you to believe otherwise.

Opening your emails, you went through the important correspondence, threw out the spam, and moved the replied ones to their relevant folders. Once your inbox was empty, you moved onto your other admin tasks for the day, ensuring you were all caught up before you stepped back into your police officer au.

When ready, you clicked on the file, and instead of it appearing, it was a blank document. “Oh no, you don’t! There were words in this file!”

Looking at the title of the word document, you were relieved to see it untitled and not that of your current story. Clicking again on the file from your writing folder, another blank document appeared instead.

“Open it! I have to write about Sungjin and Ella!” you exclaimed, hitting the file repeatedly. Tens of blank documents appeared with your efforts until you were panting with the annoyance. Sitting back, you shook your head. “That’s it! I’m buying a new laptop! I’m done with you!”

Before you could close the screen down, however, you noticed that one document appeared and had words in it. But it wasn’t your current one. Instead, Encounter appeared on the screen, scrolling at a rapid rate to the bottom. Then it changed tabs, moving through Captivated just as fast. Finally, Eternity finished it off, the words The End simply staring back at you.

“…Brian?”

Leaning forward towards the screen, you waited to see what would happen next. Annoyed that your hopes were raised yet again, you started to close the empty tabs, leaving the three stories up. A final tab appeared, and you burst into tears as words started to appear on the screen.

It’s time to start writing our story now.

Standing up shakily, you pointed at the screen. “Hurry up then, I’ve waited far too long to write this story with you.”

The screen went blank as your heart began to thud erratically in your chest, your eyes widened whilst waiting for what would happen next. Reaching for the power button, you watched as the screen lit up.

And then you felt arms embrace you immediately. “I’m sorry I’m so late.”

“I don’t care right now,” you managed to say despite your emotions running down your face. Pulling back just enough so you could see Brian’s handsome face, you shook your head in disbelief. “As long as you’re here.”

“For good,” he assured, leaning in for a passionate kiss. “That world is closed and done with. Whilst ours is only beginning.”

You knew with time, you would want to know why it took so long for Brian to return and to scold him for hurting you so much. You also knew Brian would placate you in every way, and you would hear all about his equal longing and struggle without you at his side.

But for now, this was all you needed. Dream men were hard to find existing in real life. You had found yours again, and this time you wouldn’t write him in one way or another. You’d let your life together pen the journey you had at each other’s side.

Your story was about to be continued.

_________________

Epilogue

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Ice Cream and Fire Oven Pizza - Chapter 28

Pairing: Elsa x Lea/Axel || Side Pairing: Riku x OC

Summary: Modern AU. She's an introvert ball of nerves who works at Ice Palace, a mall food court ice cream shop. He's the outgoing, sassy goofball who works at the Pizza Planet across the way. Hilarity, snark, and fluffy romcom hijinks ensue.

Word Count: 7,573

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

Credit for super friggin’ cute and super friggin’ amazing cover art goes to the super friggin’ talented ky-jane here on tumblr!

Turns out getting disowned is exhausting.

Oh sure, there'd been the initial rush of "I did it! I finally stood for myself to my family!" Then came the panic of "...oh dear god, what did I just do?!" Followed swiftly by the euphoria of "I'm finally free! Really and truly free!" Plus several other feelings that were all colors of the emotion rainbow, so many in fact that it became difficult to keep track of them all. They'd coursed through my body like electricity, keeping me going long enough to return to my old bedroom, hastily pack up what little I'd brought with me, march out the front door of my parent's mansion and straight into Lea's car before he'd sped off with us.

It didn't take long however. Just a few minutes on the road and poof! All that surging energy had scattered and abandoned me, like fleeing rats off a sinking ship. I slumped into the seat, suddenly feeling empty and so very, very tired. I didn't talk and Lea didn't try to make me. Instead, he just left me alone to listen to the low music coming out the radio as I stared vacantly out the car window. I suspected he was giving me a chance to process everything that'd just happened, figuring I'd speak up when I was ready. If I was ever ready.

I tried to process it all. I really did try. But it was like a thick, silent fog had descended over my mind, making thinking difficult. The lack of sleep from the night before seemed to finally be catching up with me. It was easier to just give in to the white noise of my thoughts as I watched the landscape outside blur by, my eyelids growing heavier with each passing mile. Eventually, I dozed off.

When I slowly stirred awake later, it was to the faint smell of leather mixed with a familiar cinnamony boy scent. Peeking one groggy eyelid open, I found myself still in the car seat but with Lea's jacket folded and tucked behind my head now as some sort of makeshift pillow. The car was no longer moving and the engine was off - perhaps that was what had woken me up.

"Rise n' shine, sleepyhead!" came Lea's chipper voice as I felt his hand on my shoulder, gently shaking me.

Rubbing my eyes, I glanced at where he stood next to the vehicle, one elbow propped on the top edge of my open car door as he grinned down at me. "How long was I out?" I mumbled, giving a little stretch to work out some of the kinks in my neck and back.

"Few hours," he shrugged as I noticed he was still wearing those silly heart sunglasses, only now they were perched atop his head. "You looked like you could use the Z's and I didn't wanna disturb ya, so I've just been driving in circles round Twilight Town for a while now. C'mon," he tossed his chin to one side, gesturing for me to climb out of the car.

I yawned and unbuckled my seatbelt, then felt his hand on mine as he helped me out. The sun was hanging low, making me wince and shield my eyes against it. Blinking a couple times to let my vision adjust, I then looked around and my brow furrowed as I recognized the parking lot we were in. "...the mall? Why are we here?"

"What d'ya say?" he tapped a finger lightly to my nose, his grin twitching wider. "Up for a lil adventure?"

I stared blankly at him for a few seconds. But his smile was infectious and I could feel a matching one slowly tugging at my lips. "Sure."

He retrieved his jacket, shrugging into it before slamming my door shut and locking it. Then his fingers laced through mine once more and he led me inside. I knew where he was taking me even before he turned us down the deserted wing of the mall that was under construction. It didn't take him long to pick the locked door and soon I was carefully following him up those winding, rickety old steps. As we reached the top of the clocktower and stepped onto the outer walkway, a warm breeze greeted us. I let him guide me around towards the clock face side and as we turned the corner, a tiny gasp escaped me.

By now the sun has dipped halfway below the horizon, setting the sky ablaze with orange and crimson. Soft, billowing clouds painted the heavens above while a warm, golden hue had settled like a blanket over the cityscape below. It made the buildings almost seem to glow and sparkle in the twilight as if by some sort of ancient yet whimsical magic. The sight of it all was beautiful. Overwhelming. Breathtaking.

"You're right," I murmured at last, unable to take my eyes off the view. "Sunset really does make this place sing."

"Told ya," he beamed, plonking his rear down onto the ledge and letting his feet dangle off the side. "I like to come here whenever I've had a rough day that's kicked the shit outta me. It usually helps me sort out my thoughts and feelings. Centers me. Gets me in a better headspace." He patted the spot behind him in invitation and I obliged, taking a seat next to him. Then he was reaching inside his jacket and pulling out two little red lollipops. He ripped the wrapper off of one, popping it into his mouth before offering me the other one.

I quirked an eyebrow down at it. "Not Sea Salt ice cream? Isn't that sacrilege? Won't Xion and Roxas kick you out of the club?"

He smirked around the sucker and shrugged. "I won't tell if you won't. 'Sides, I know you're not the biggest fan of Sea Salt, so figured this could just as easily do in a pinch."

"...thanks," I smiled softly, taking it from him.

"Course! Now just sit back, relax, and drink in all that majesty," he stretched a hand out wide before him to indicate said majesty before leaning back, bracing himself on his palms. "I'll be here whenever you wanna talk about it. Or not. I can also be here to just chill until you're ready for me to drive you home. Point is, I'm here for you, whatever ya need."

I didn't say anything to that at first, just gazed out once more at the amazing sight below. I inhaled slowly, as if trying to breathe it all in as I watched the thin, distant smoke plume coming off the tram while it wove its journey throughout the city. My hands were in my lap, fingers idly twisting the lollipop one way then the other then back again, leaving its plastic wrap unopened.

Since waking up in the car, I hadn't really given much thought to all that had happened today. I think part of me preferred to remain blissfully content pretending none of it had occurred. That it'd all just been a dream. I knew the second that I gave it so much as even an ounce of real thought, that it'd all suddenly become so very real. I was dreading it. But it also seemed I couldn't put it off anymore.

The memories of just a few short hours earlier were beginning to creep back into my mind unbidden, refusing to be ignored any longer. They welled up in my chest painfully until finally bursting out of me in the form of a shaky but derisive huff of a laugh. "So… guess I'm no longer a Fryse, huh?"

Lea snerked, drawing one knee up to his chest while swinging the other leg. "Somehow I doubt it's that simple."

"Grandfather seemed to think it was," I sighed heavily, setting my hand down beside me on the ledge. Apparently next to Lea's, for I could feel his thumb brushing against my pinky.

"Forget him," he razzed his tongue. An impressive feat around the lollipop. "He's just a big, whiny man-baby in a grumpy old blowhard suit throwing a fit and struggling to stay relevant. We didn't exactly hear your folks singing the same tune as him, did we?"

"...they weren't exactly disagreeing with him or leaping to my defense either," I hung my head as my eyes started to prickle. I blinked the sensation away.

"Hey now," he said gently, covering my hand with his. The warmth from his palm was soothing. "If anyone knows how hard it can be to stand up to family, it's you. Betcha it ain't easy for your pops to go against his old man's wishes. 'Sides, today was a lot, not just for you but for your folks too. Give them some time to let it all sink in. Who knows, before long they could be telling Gramps to take a hike and reaching out to you to try and patch things up."

I shook my head with a wry snort. "You don't know them like I do. Even if by some miracle they realize they had no right to be so controlling and overbearing, they're too stubborn and proud to ever admit it. No, rocks will break out into song and dance before they ever speak to me again, much less admit they were wrong."

"Wanna put munny on that?" he challenged with a grin and I just rolled my eyes. "You'll see. Just you wait. But for now, the important thing is ya did it. The hard part's over and your life is your own now to do whatever you want with it."

"Suppose that's true. It feels like a weight has been lifted," I smiled as I looked out onto the sunset once more.

My heart really was feeling lighter than it had in a long time. I was free to do whatever I wanted… now if only I knew what exactly that was. But ah well, one step at a time. For now, I'd just be happy with the fact that I had a job, some friends, and was tentatively exploring the world of theater. That was enough for me at the moment. I could figure out the rest later. I had the time now and nothing holding me back. Not anymore.

I glanced at Lea out of the corner of my eye, nose wrinkling slightly in amusement. "Can I just say though that you deserve an Oscar?"

He turned his head towards me, eyes crinkling. "Do I? What for?"

"When you got all in a huff over Grandfather trying to pay you to dump me and get lost," I hummed a low laugh, shaking my head. "I have to hand it to you, even I thought you were really mad when you came barging into the room to get me."

"Oh, I was hella pissed actually."

"...you were?" Both eyebrows shot up my forehead at his nod. "But why? It's not as if we were ever really dating. Heck, we were planning on breaking up," my fingers bounced in air quotes around the two words, "in a few weeks anyway. You could have just agreed to it, taken Grandfather's munny then did as he asked, at least as far as he ever knew. He would have been none the wiser."

Lea scratched at a spot behind his ear, lollipop stick shifting as his lips pursed to one side. "Well I… I guess it just ticked me off that the asshole woulda tried to pull something like that with his own granddaughter. That if I was someone you'd really been in love with, how he woulda just gone and broken your heart like that and expected me to help him do it." His eyes narrowed on the reddening sky, "Old coot's just lucky his brittle osteoporosis bones kept me from punching the crap outta him."

I blinked at him. Then one corner of my lips tugged up. "You're sweet, you big old softie," I told him, leaning into his side and resting my head on his shoulder.

"I, uh… shucks, El, you're gonna make me blush," he chuckled. I felt his arm come up slowly to wrap around my shoulders, squeezing them in a reassuring hug. Then he cleared his throat," So… your sister and your ex, huh?"

A grimace pinched my face. Somehow, I'd almost forgotten that part. I think I'd been trying to block it out. "...yeah."

"Ouch," he summed up eloquently.

"Tell me about it." I hesitated, staring down at the sucker as it still twirled to and fro between my finger and thumb. "They got together the day after the wedding fell through. Imagine… the centerpieces had barely been carted off by the caterers before Hans was jumping my little sister. And this whole thing?" I pointed back and forth between the two of us, "You and me? All just Anna's ploy to get Mother and Father so angry with me that they'd have nothing left when they found out about her and Hans."

"What? No, that can't be right. Anna cares about ya too much to ever do something like that to you."

I frowned. "Well… she did say she honestly thought it would help me deal with Mother and Father… that that was the main reason she pushed me into it. But she also admitted that a small part of it was for her own selfish reasons." There it was again. A tiny, aching twinge in my chest. I shook my head against his shoulder, feeling the material of his shirt rub against my cheek. "I just can't believe that she'd use me like that. That she'd go through with such a ridiculous, half-baked, harebrained scheme just to try and avoid getting into a fight with our parents."

His whole body shook with a snort. "Says the girl who just went through with a ridiculous, half-baked harebrained scheme just to try and avoid getting into a fight with her parents."

...doh.

Elsa, Queen of Putting Her Foot In Her Mouth.

"Touché," I grumbled, scowling straight ahead. "To be fair, it was still Anna's harebrained scheme. I was just the fool that went along with it."

Lea laughed, "Still, my point is ya both know how difficult your folks can be, so you can probably understand a lil where she was coming from."

A sigh. "Maybe a bit. Even so, at least I never threw her under the bus like she did me. I... don't know if I can ever forgive her for this."

"Give it time," his hand gently smoothed up and down my arm. "A day or two. Let yourself cool off. When Anna comes to talk to you - and trust me, she will - just try and listen with an open mind, 'kay? I have zero doubt you two crazy kids'll work this whole mess out. Plus ya gotta keep in mind, it's all thanks to her and Hans that you got that last kick in the rear you needed to finally stand up to your snooty family and tell 'em what's what and just straight up lay down the law. That oughta score her a point or two at least, right?"

My eyebrows knit together. "I guess… by that bit of twisted logic, yes, Anna showing up with Hans was the tipping point that made me decide enough was enough. If it weren't for her, I might have never told my parents the truth or-" my eyes widened with a sharp intake of breath. "Oh gosh, the truth! The whole mall- Everyone still thinks we're- That you and I are still- What are we supposed to tell them now?!"

I felt him shrug, heard his fingers scratching at his cheek. "...the truth?"

I groaned, "Ugh, wouldn't it be simpler just to say we broke up?"

"...yeah… maybe…" His voice grew quieter, more distant, with a note of… something else, but I wasn't quite sure what.

My lower lip tucked in in thought. Then, "You're probably relieved... what with this insanity finally being all over and done with. Now you can get your life back."

"I dunno," he hummed, resting his cheek atop my head as he gave my shoulders another small squeeze, thumb tracing a small circle against my arm. "Was just sorta getting used to it all. Gonna miss being your fake boyfriend."

A grin pulled at one side of my mouth. "...it was kind of fun, wasn't it? I think I'll miss being your fake girlfriend too. Almost makes me a little sad."

"Well buck up! Got just the thing to chase away those post-make-believe-relationship blues," he released me now, lightly rubbing my back as I pulled away. I watched as he was once more reaching inside his leather jacket, this time pulling out a-

"You've got to be kidding me," I deadpanned as he slipped the cartoon-lip sunglasses onto my face. I didn't even fight it. I knew it would have been a losing battle. "Just how many of these things did you steal?"

"Just the two," he smirked, flipping his heart-shades down to sit on the bridge of his nose. Lollipop finished, he flicked away the little white stick only to whip out yet another sucker to replace it. "Smoke 'em if you got 'em," he chirped, tearing the plastic off before stabbing the candy between his lips.

...well, when in Rome, I guess.

I opened mine as well and closed my mouth around it. Huh. Cinnamon. Who'da thunk?

"Atta girl," he chuckled, nudging my shoulder with his. "Rocking those sweet ass shades to boot."

I wanted to roll my eyes at him. But it would have been halfhearted at best and let's face it, the effect would've been totally lost behind the lip-glasses anyhow. Instead, a tiny laugh bubbled out of me whether I wanted it to or not.

So there we were. Sitting atop a mall clocktower, eating candy and watching the sunset through cheap, novelty sunglasses. And even though Operation Boyfriend But Shh Not Really had royally crashed and burned and now laid shattered in a million pieces that I still had to clean up and sort out… in that exact moment, somehow…

...somehow things didn't seem all that bad.

"Ya sure you're okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine," I said for what felt like the thousandth time. At Lea's dubious squint, I laughed softly, "Really."

I mean, I thought I was.

At least, I seemed to be as we made our way back down the clocktower's decrepit wooden steps. I wasn't sure exactly how long we'd stayed up there. Long enough for early night to fall and for the first stars to begin lightly dotting the sky, however much time that had taken. It'd been nice, just sitting there watching the reds fade to purples and blues. Comforting, in fact. An almost zen-like calm had fallen over me. I didn't blame Lea for being skeptical however. This was me we were talking about here. And after the day I'd had, even I was still kind of anticipating the inevitable meltdown that would totally be on brand for me and had still yet to come. Maybe it was just lurking in the shadows, lying in wait and ready to pounce when I least expected it. Or maybe it wouldn't come at all. Maybe watching the gorgeous sunset had been just the thing I needed to disperse it before it even began.

I could hope so, at least. Here's crossing my fingers!

We got to the bottom of the stairs and rejoined the mall proper. The stores were still open but it looked like closing time would soon be upon us, so while the crowd had thinned considerably by now, there were still some shoppers milling about making their last minute purchases. Just as those double doors leading outside to the parking lot came into view, Lea suddenly stopped, tapping the side of his fist into his palm.

"Almost forgot, gotta pick something up. I'll be super quick and meet ya at the car." He was about to take off but hesitated mid-turn, looking back at me with a small frown. "...you sure you're-"

"I'm okay," I insisted, huffing out a chuckle. My hand gave his shoulder a small shove, "Hurry up and go already."

However instead of going, he grinned down at me and stepped closer, his hand lifting towards my cheek. But then it froze midway, hanging there for one very long second before he hastily snatched it back to ruffle his hair instead with a weak laugh. "Heh… be back in a flash!" Then he bolted, vanishing into the throng.

I just stood there for a few seconds, staring after him as I bit my bottom lip. Pretty sure he'd been about to kiss my forehead out of habit, but had thought better of it at the last minute. We were in a weird grey area at the moment. Officially, our little dating act had come to a close. But no one at the mall knew that yet, so… were things like that still okay? At least for a little while longer? Probably not. We wouldn't want to complicate or confuse matters. He'd probably made the right call stopping himself. The smart and sensible call. We just needed to quit cold turkey.

It would be for the best.

Still, knowing that did nothing to ease the dull ache I now felt in my chest. I couldn't help feeling a little disappointed. I kind of wished he had given me that forehead kiss. Just one last time. Gosh, it was only now hitting me how accustomed I'd grown to all his little touches. I really was going to miss being his girlfriend, even if it had all just been for show.

Curse that boy and his stupid dating embargo!

Hugging myself with a sigh, I walked slowly out the mall exit. The night air felt good on my skin as I took my time crossing the parking lot towards Lea's car. True to his word, I wasn't waiting there long at all before I spotted him emerging from the shopping center to jog towards me with a white plastic bag in hand. He opened my door first before sliding across his hood to let himself in on the driver side.

"No peeking now," he winked at me as he plopped down into his seat, handing the bag to me.

I blinked down at it as I held it between my hands. It was knotted tightly at the top, making sneaking a peek not really an option anyway. There was no logo on the bag, nothing to identify where it'd come from, nor was it see-through. The only thing I could determine was it felt box-shaped inside. Arching an eyebrow, I held it up to my ear with a little shake.

Snerking, Lea's grip closed around my wrist, forcing my hands still. "None of that either."

My eyelids drooped at him but I relented, settling the bag into my lap and buckling myself in. Lea did the same before turning the key in the ignition, backing us out of the parking spot and hitting the road.

A few minutes later found me unlocking the door to my apartment and stepping inside with a, "Hello? Anyone home?" My call was greeted with silence from the totally dark room inside. Frowning, I flicked on the switch and as everything lit up, I noticed the door to my roomies' bedroom open and black inside. Nope, not in there either.

"Huh. Wonder where they got to," Lea mused from where he stood in the doorway behind me, toting my luggage he'd so gallantly volunteered to carry up for me.

"Their car wasn't in its parking space," I pointed out as I made room for him, moving towards the dining table to set the mystery bag down on it. "Figured Riku might just be making an emergency baby cravings run for Rayne and that we'd at least find her up here still… maybe they went to a movie?" I guessed, pulling out my phone to see if I'd missed any texts from either of them. Unfortunately, that's when I discovered the battery had died. Which made sense now that I thought about it. It had been running unplugged since the crack of dawn when I'd used it to pull up every variation of the scotcheroo recipe known to humankind.

Setting my bags down next to a kitchen chair, one of his hands went to his hip while the other rubbed the back of his head. "Well damn. Was hoping they'd be around to feed ya."

"Feed me?" I echoed, a crease forming between my eyebrows as I turned to face him, leaning back against the backrest of the couch.

He snorted at me from across the dining table. "Don't think I haven't noticed how you haven't had a bite to eat all day, missy."

"Not true," I folded my arms under my chest and looked away with a tiny scoff. "I'll have you know I filled up on scotcheroo batter all morning."

"Sure, cuz that's healthy," his eyes narrowed over his grin. "You didn't have anything at the party last night either. Maybe I should order you some takeout," he muttered as he pulled out his phone and swiped to unlock his screen.

I looked up towards the ceiling with a sigh and a shake of my head. "You don't have to take care of me, you know. I said I was okay."

"You also said you don't know how to cook. I can't leave ya to fend for yourself and starve," he said distractedly, frowning down at his phone while his thumb flicked across his screen a few times. Probably scrolling through whatever food options were still open at this hour.

"I wouldn't starve, I do know how to use a microwave," I countered, hand idly reaching for my braid. Except… no braid. That's right, it was still up in that haphazard bun. A rather uncomfortable, haphazard bun, I might add. I pulled it free, letting my hair fall down around my shoulders as my fingers shook it out. Ah, so much better. "Rayne's always leaving leftovers in the fridge for me to heat up."

"Ya sure? Really, I don't mind making a quick food run for y-" he glanced up from the screen to me just as his fingers seemed to have a malfunction and dropped his phone. He gave a tiny yelp and fumbled with it for a second before catching it firmly in hand once again, breathing a soft whew!

I arched an eyebrow with a snerk. "You doing alright there?"

"Yeah, uh… yeah! These things are slippery lil bastards, huh?" he waggled the phone in the air with a feeble chuckle, his face reddening from what I guessed would be embarrassment over his little bout of clumsiness. Pocketing it again, he took a step back towards the front door as he crossed his arms, wedging his hands into his armpits. "Well if ya think you've got the food situation covered, I'll probably just be headin' out then."

I frowned, pushing myself up off the sofa backrest. "You're leaving?" I'd been under the impression that he was going to stick around at least for a little while longer. The company would have been welcome, especially with Rayne and Riku not home.

He ambled another step back, looking down as he scratched the tip of his nose. "Yup, got a lotta… homework. Yeah! Tons of it. Mountains of it back at my place just... calling my name, heh! So, ya know… better get to it!"

"Oh… yes, of course," I mumbled, trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice. Obviously he had schoolwork to get back to. He'd had no time to do it all weekend thanks to me, so he was probably looking at a heavy backlog. I'd taken up too much of his time already burdening him with my problems. It was time to let him go. Taking a deep breath, I put on a brave front and forced a smile. "Have a good night. And thank you for… well, for everything. It… All of it has meant the world to me."

He hesitated for a few seconds, frowning but expression otherwise unreadable. Then he dragged his hand across his face with a tired-sounding laugh. "Don't mention it. Just… do me a favor? Get something substantial in your stomach before breaking into these," he approached the table once more, retrieving the little white bag and holding it up. "Til then, we'll just tuck them away in here so they don't melt," he said, moving towards the fridge.

Melt? Huh. Come to think of it, it had slightly been cold to the touch, but I'd hardly noticed it at the time. My head tipped to one side, "...do I get to know what they are now?"

"Guess it can't hurt to let the cat outta the bag at this point," he opened the freezer door, placing it inside before shooting me a grin. "Do the words Frozen Heart mean anything to you?"

I stiffened. "...as in the ice cream?"

"Yup!" Lea beamed now, closing the door again and propping his shoulder against it. "Whole pack of 'em! That's your fave, right?"

Blinking a couple times, I nodded slowly. I could feel it. This… weird, funny feeling in my chest. "How… When did you figure it out?"

He gave a half-shrug. "Told ya, El. Gotta gift. Knew it since day one, actually. Just kept the lil guessing game up cuz it gave me an excuse to talk to ya all the time and hopefully bring you a laugh. But figured you could use it after the day you've had. Just what the doc ordered, chocked fulla all the stuff you like - mint chocolate chip with a full strawberry in the middle, or the 'heart' at the frozen center, all coated in crunchy, crystallize sugar shell, aka the ic-"

I don't know how it happened. One second, I was just standing there with the space of the whole kitchen between him and me. The next, I'd closed the distance somehow and was colliding into his chest, forcing a small surprised oof out of him as my arms wrapped around his waist, hanging on for dear life. I felt his whole body tense with a confused, "El?"

"I'm not," I muffled into his shirt.

"...you're not…?"

"I'm not okay!" I looked up at him now, not letting go. My calm had cracked and feeling Lea's arms closing around me only served to shatter it completely. Every inch of me felt like an exposed nerve as all those emotions came crashing painfully in now. "I'm not! Nothing is right! Nothing… nothing except for you! You, with your warmth and your smiles and your ice cream and… and your silly nicknames and ridiculous sunglasses and your lizard and your sappy movies and your college course catalogues and… and…"

I didn't even know what I was trying to say anymore, so I seriously doubted Lea did either. He didn't seem to mind however, his hand with a slight tremor to it coming up to brush along my cheek, sweep a few pale strands behind my ear, slowly stroke down the full length of my hair. He just nodded and let me go on, his gaze softening as he rested his forehead against mine.

"...and everyone else is just so… so… I mean, Grandfather with his birthday party of judgement! And Mother! Mother and her sneaky lullaby, using the nose trick against me! The nose trick! That thing is sacred! But no, it was all just so she could find goth contraband for Aunt Yelena to throw in my face! And Hans! Hans, with his stupid sideburns! His stupid, sister-groping sideburns! And Anna! I still can't believe she… that she'd… I mean, I made her scotcheroos! Scotcheroos! Well, at least I tried to make them, but still, that should count for something, right?! And-" I felt his thumb wiping away something wet at the corner of my eye. Tears. I hadn't even known they were there. With a tiny jolt, I gave a weak laugh, "And I'm a total babbling mess! Sorry, I… I just need to not be thinking about this right now. Distract me, please. Anything to get my mind off of-"

And then he was kissing me.

I lost all sense of my surroundings as it all just seemed to fade away, no longer important. Every last thought in my head was obliterated. I could no longer tell left from right, heads from tails… nothing. I knew nothing except the warm caress of his lips against mine. Nothing except his scent, so familiar and yet in this moment, suddenly somehow new and intoxicating. My knees buckled but his arm wrapped around my waist, catching me and trapping me against him. His other hand had tangled itself in my hair as my fingers slid up his chest, clutching his shirt for support. I was dizzy and lightheaded and giddy all at once, my world completely turned upside down and-

Oh.

Oh wow…

...so that's what this is supposed to feel like.

All too soon Lea broke it off, drawing his head back slightly with a soft, shaky breath that I didn't so much hear as felt against my lips. He dragged his gaze from where it lingered on my mouth up to look into my eyes, his own now hooded and dark as they searched mine. Still trying to piece my scrambled brain back together, I struggled to find words and the only ones I could come up with were a breathy, "...not… quite the distraction I had in mind. I was thinking something... more along the lines of a movie?"

His eyes widened and his muscles went rigid. Then in the blink of an eye, he'd released me and backed away several steps, shaking his head as his hands raked through his crimson spikes. "Shit. Fuck! I shouldn't have done that. I had no right to- Crap, I'm sorry! I'm so sorry, El! God fucking damn it, what the hell is the matter with me? I'm so stupid! I never shoulda-"

I abruptly threw myself at him again, arms hugging his neck and pulling his head down as my lips found his once more. He staggered with a sharp intake through his nose, his whole body going stock still. My heart raced as I molded against him, sinking into his pleasant body heat.

Slowly, his mouth responded as his trembling hands reached for me, trailing down my sides, exploring the curve of my waist before coming to rest on my hips, gripping them tightly as he tugged me more firmly against him. My fingers toyed with the hairs at the nape of his neck, eliciting a soft groan from him as his kiss became more fervid, filled with such… such… raw, unbridled need. Abruptly, he was pushing me up against the fridge, pinning my body between it and him.

Something fell with a clatter. A magnet? I didn't really know. Nor did I really care. But the sound was enough to snap Lea back to his senses as he pulled away with a gasp and suddenly held me at arms length. "No! This isn't right! You're vulnerable right now, I shouldn't be- Shit, I don't want you to think I-" He released a frustrated snarl, pressing a fist to his mouth as he backed further away, angrily pacing now. Then, "I should go."

He turned, hastily making his way towards the front door. Halfway there however, he hesitated, steps faltering as he glanced back towards me. He swallowed hard, something in his eyes telling me his flimsy resolve was this close to breaking. "...I need to go," he repeated, voice hoarse yet determined now as he pushed forward, reaching the door and letting himself out, slamming it shut behind him.

I was still propped up against the fridge, barely standing. The room was quiet except for my soft pants to catch my breath and the booming of my rapid pulse in my ears. My face was hot and I could still feel the sweet ghost of his lips on mine. Feel my whole body buzzing from his touch.

...he was right. Goddamn him, he was right. Now wasn't the time for this… whatever this was. I should go to bed. I should rest up and approach this with a clearer, more rational head on my shoulders tomorrow. He'd made the right choice. The responsible choice. If we'd kept carrying on like that, it would have been a mistake and…

...and so what?

So what if it was a mistake? It was my mistake to make! That I wanted to make. Besides, I didn't think it actually was a mistake, not really. It's not like this was just some spur of the moment attempt to hide from my pain within his physical comfort. This… this was something I'd be wanting for some time. And so now, what… I was just supposed to put it on pause and wait? Just because of something so insignificant as… bad timing?

To hell with that.

I'd been pretending. This whole time, I'd been pretending. And no, I didn't just mean the fake relationship to fool my parents. I'd been fooling myself. Tricking myself into believing this was just a crush when it was really… I don't even know, but it was so much more than just some simple crush! I'd been pretending my feelings were trivial, pretending that… that I couldn't see those same feelings in Lea when really I'd known. I'd known all this time, but I'd been too afraid to face them. To face him.

I was scared of everything. Always stressing and second guessing myself and overthinking things. But not this. I wasn't scared of this. Not anymore. In that moment, I'd never been more sure of anything in my life and I-

I had to stop him from leaving.

I pulled out my phone, almost dropped it but caught in time, then pressed the power button.

...nope, still dead.

Right. I tossed it onto the table as I ran past, rushing for the door. Maybe he hadn't made it to his car yet. If I hurried, I could hopefully still catch him. My hand closed around the doorknob, yanking it open and-

-jumping backwards with a tiny yelp to avoid getting crushed as Lea suddenly came falling through it, his back crashing flat against the floor at my feet. He hissed in pain, wincing up at me.

"Are you okay? What..." my brow furrowed as I looked down at him, then to my door, then back. "...were you just… leaning back against the door?"

He hopped up to his feet, laughing self-consciously as he dragged a hand along the back of his neck. "Yeah! Sorry! Just… needed a sec to, er… to get my head on straight." He inched back a step towards the hallway outside. "Right, so uh…" Another step back. "I'm gonna..." he jerked his thumb over his shoulder with a click of his tongue, "...gonna get going now."

As he began to turn away however, I grabbed his hand in both of mine. He froze, looking down at where my fingers wrapped around his. Then up at me, confusion in his eyes.

This whole time, I'd been pretending. But now…

"...I don't want to pretend anymore," I told him quietly, stepping closer and gazing up the few inches that separated us. Recalling something he'd once told me, I added, "I… wish we were real too."

Lea sucked in a low, shuddering breath, hesitating for only a heartbeat more. Then a soft, "Oh thank god," came tumbling from his lips as he grabbed my face with both hands to kiss me again, pouring his entire being into it. Kicking the door shut behind him and still locked in our embrace, he backed me further and further into the room until my legs hit the backrest of the couch and we both went toppling over it, my back hitting the cushions with him on top of me.

Abruptly, he pulled his lips off of mine, but only long enough for him to sit up on his knees so he could jerk off his jacket and throw it somewhere. Then he came back down, his hands finding mine, weaving our fingers together to either side of my head as his nose brushed against mine. His mouth stopped just short of my own however and I could taste the hint of his breath as his eyes crinkled and he smiled tenderly at me. Oh gosh, there was that dimple of his again. That dimple was straight up murder. My heart spasmed and I bit back a grin myself. Then he was kissing me.

It was soft as slow at first, as if to savor it. Then his tongue was lightly grazing along my lips and the kiss deepened. It came as no surprise that he tasted like cinnamon - I probably did too at the moment. However, the flavor was way more enticing on his tongue than it could ever hope to be just coming from some candy. His lips were growing more urgent, more demanding. Fire. It felt like I was on fire. It felt like my insides were melting to mush.

He was gently pressing his weight down into me, his hand moving to hook under my knee and tug it up, wrapping my leg around his waist. Now free, my own hand wound itself into his hair again before trailing down his neck and further, feeling the hard planes of his back through the material of his shirt, digging my nails in.

Breaking our lips apart, Lea now traced hungry kisses along my jawline and down my neck until he found my pulse point. He swirled his tongue against it, causing my body to react on its own and arch my back up into him. His body eagerly pushed back as his teeth began to nibble at the sensitive spot where my neck met my shoulder. A hum of a sigh escaped me and he answered with a low growl deep in his throat, suddenly biting down hard.

My neck burned deliciously and I made a noise that was somewhere between a gasp and a moan. I'd never, ever made a noise like that before in my life. I might have been embarrassed if I had had half a mind to. Instead, I was too lost in the pleasure as he sucked on the now tender skin before chuckling, slowly trailing his lips just a bit further up my neck and lightly nipping at a fresh spot.

Oh dear lord, he was going to do it again.

I barely scraped together enough sense to breathe, "Lea, wait."

His whole body tensed as he went very still, his breath heavy and hot against my throat. Then all of a sudden he was pulling away, sitting up and quickly shifting to the opposite end of the couch from me. "You're right," his voice was husky, his face flushed as he hunched forward, elbow propping on his knee as he brought his hand up in an attempt to hide his tiny, guilty scowl. "You're right. Fuck, I was moving too fast. Sorry, I… I didn't mean to-"

"No," I said quickly, scooting closer to him. "That's… not what I meant. I just… I'm not sure when they," I glanced towards my roomies' empty bedroom, "will be home. We wouldn't want them to find us out here, er..." I cleared my throat, my cheeks doing the impossible and blushing even harder than they already were. I paused, trying to compose myself and gather my scrambled thoughts, absently licking my lips as I did so. He went very still, half-lidded eyes now very intently focused on my mouth. My chest fluttered under the intensity of his gaze and I cleared my throat again, "What I'm trying to say is that… maybe we should…"

Ugh, I was too flustered to say it.

Flustered, but not nervous. Or anxious or scared or awkward or… This wasn't making me feel any of the things I normally would've expected myself to feel in this situation. No, this…

This felt right.

This is something I wanted. Really, really wanted. I could feel it, deep down in my heart. And for once, I wanted to listen to what my heart was telling me.

And right now it was telling me to kiss him.

So I did. I slowly reached a hand up, softly tracing my fingers over his jawline before clasping at the nape of his neck and gently tugging his head down so I could press my lips to his again. He inhaled, long and slow, his warm hand cupping my cheek.

He seemed reluctant to end the kiss, his mouth following mine when I finally pulled away. But then I stood up and faced him, taking his hands in mine and drawing him to his feet as well. Smiling shyly up at him, I began pulling him towards the door to my room and as if in a trance, he followed. I led him inside, the door quietly shutting behind us.

Author's Note: Sooooo... pretty sure they know they like each other now, what do ya'll think? :P Oh gosh, writing and sharing this chapter all but made me burst into flames *blushing intensifies* lol! I tell ya, for someone who starts so many fics where romance is one of the major themes, it is VERY rare that I actually get to The Big Kiss (TM) scene, so this just had me squirming the whole time xD Lea, that dear boy, he tried so hard to be the responsible one, he really did, but a guy only has so much willpower! And I know, things weren't really talked out this chapter, but don't worry, a lil discussion is on the horizon xD Also, does everyone remember something Elsa said to Lea way, waaaay back in chapter 15 during their car ride up to her old condo? Something small but SUPER relevant here... xD On a different note, we finally know it! Elsa's fave ice cream: Frozen Heart, oooOOOooOOoo fancy! THIS one is not named after a keyblade - I really wanted to of course name it after Arendelle world's keyblade in KH3, but let's face it… Crystal Snow was kinda a bland name! Frozen Heart would have been WAY better, not to mention a SUPER obvious choice for a keyblade name so I dunno why the design team didn't go with that! Anyway, its Ice Palace menu listing might look a lil something like: "Blue mint chocolate chip with silver sprinkles, coated in an icy, crystallized sugar shell on the outside and a strawberry slice that can be found buried deep within its chilly center. Will you be the one to melt this frozen heart?" …or something equally cheesy xD Anyhoo, heads up guys, if you hadn't guessed, we're now entering the homestretch of this story! Figured that'd be okay to tell ya, since if this were a paperback that you could physically hold in your hands, you'd be able to tell when there were only a few more chapters left in that case too xD But I have some good news waiting for ya'll at the end of this story's final chapter, so hopefully that gives ya something to look forward to!

Next time… oh gosh, just what does the future hold for these two crazy lovebirds? Once the sea of raging hormones has ebbed, what will be left? Are these two finally gonna get together for realsies? Or will this decision they made in the heat of the moment be seen as a mistake? And what about all of Elsa's fam drama? Did she really manage to leave it all behind or will it rear its ugly head again? Do we REALLY believe Lea when he says he only stole two of the novelty glasses? Stay tuned!

Thanks for reading, I super duper appreciate it! And an extra BIG thank you to those of you who’ve liked, reblogged, and followed so far, seeing those lil notifications always brings the biggest, goofiest smile to my face!

FIRST CHAPTER || PREVIOUS CHAPTER || NEXT CHAPTER

[lils420]

A lil something for the kids - Part 6

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female!Reader (I promise you we‘re close)

Summary: Y/n has now arrived in Wakanda, but will they take her? A night has passed since Part 5

https://lils420.tumblr.com/post/617186196866646016/lils420

Warnings: None

Y/n was woken up the next day by the soft buzzing of the jet she was in. Quinjet Rogers had called it. He was sitting on the pilot seat, seemingly in thought, and flying the plane effortlessly. Y/n couldn’t help but wonder how many times he had done it before. Through the windows, y/n was able to see the low plains of what she believed was Kenya, immersed in the red-golden twilight of the sun rising. It was breathtaking. She also saw her reflection, which, she figured, wasn’t half as beautiful. Still wearing the blue overcoat, she looked worn out. The stress of the past week had caused her to loose weight and with it, the inner glow of a healthy person. Her y/h/c hair wasn’t as lively as usual, missing it’s vitality. Suddenly, y/n longed for a warm shower to clean herself up and wash her troubles away. She shuddered and pulled her coat tighter around her before standing up and making her way to the cockpit, taking the seat next to Steve.

“Good morning”, he greeted her as she made herself comfortable, “You look about as alive as I feel.”

Y/n made a quiet noise half-way between a laugh and a snort. “Must feel like being a zombie then.”

“That would be highly accurate”, Steve smiled, “But in good news, we’re almost in Wakanda.”

Y/n felt obligated to point out that there was not a single house in sight, yet alone the technological advanced super nation that Steve had described Wakanda to be, but she kept her mouth shut. What point was there to keep asking questions about things that seemed normal to the Avengers if the only outcome was her making a fool of herself. Instead, she busied herself with inspecting the numerous buttons in front of her and Steve. Her time away from earth had taught her multiple things of planes and aircraft, even though she felt that she was not half as comfortable in a cockpit as Steve was. There also was a third chair in the cockpit, which Thor had sat on until yesterday. Y/n had liked Thor, with his big heart and boyish grin. Because he seemed to trust everyone and everything, he had told her about his own story yesterday. About his adopted brother Loki, about Aether, and the death of his mother. And repetitively also about Jane, his ex girlfriend, which, turns out, had not been dumped by Thor but vice versa. They had said goodbye to Thor at about midnight, because he wanted to defend Asgard, his home town, from something called Ragnork and therefore had to continue his quest. Although y/n had no idea what it meant, she felt the urgency in his voice when he talked about it and in that she saw Thor’s great love for his people. And when she watched him practically ‘beam’ himself into the sky, on a light way as strong and beautiful as her own power, she felt a sudden wave of sadness that their acquaintance had been over so quickly. Even now, just looking at the chair, she missed him, in a weird, but familiar way.

“Are you ready?”, Steve asked, interrupting y/n’s thoughts. She nodded. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” As if on queue, the quinjet dipped into the protection that had shielded whatever lay inside from outside eyes, and gave sight to an enormous city. In the middle pranked a combination of skillfully designed towers, weaving and reaching into the sky, announcing modernity and progress to anyone that looked at them. Surrounded by equally elegant housing, the city stretched until the very outskirts of the mountain it had been build upon, just reaching the spot where Steve and y/n had entered. People where walking around, talking, flying, some with animals, some with weapons, covering the city, up until the more traditionally build suburbs, which promised the continuity of tradition in the modern world and interlinking past and future in a perfectly build present. Y/n hadn’t realized she had stopped breathing until she exhaled audibly. “So this is Wakanda”, she remarked softly. Rogers flew straight over the city, giving y/n the opportunity to inspect it closely, leaving her even more overwhelmed by the sheer beauty of it. Even when Steve had landed the plane, near one of the towers, and they climbed out of it, she had to remind herself constantly to keep her mouth shut. It was hard, especially when they were greeted by a committee made up of female warriors, that radiated strength and security. One of them stepped forward. “Captain America”, she stated confidently, “What a pleasure to see you.” Both made a cross with their arms, a form of greeting y/n supposed, before Steve answered. “Good morning, Okoye. Thank you for having us.” “Don’t thank me”, she retorted, “If it was going my way, we would keep Wakanda closed. I do wonder what you put in T’Challa’s head that he keeps agreeing to see you.” Steve shrugged apologetically, before Okoye looked at y/n. “So this is her? The Fire girl? She does not look like much.” Okoye’s eyes lingered on y/n for a little longer, and y/n felt herself shrinking into the coat, as if it could protect her. In an even more helpless attempt to escape the gaze, she clinged onto her backpack. Then, abruptly, Okoye turned around and went towards one of the towers. Steve and y/n followed her, behind them the rest of the warriors.

The inside was architecturally as impressive as the outside. They went through multiple long corridors before entering what y/n believed was the the kings headquarters. T’Challa. “My king”, Okoye announced, “Captain America and the Fire girl.” She went to stand on the side, making it possible for y/n to see the king. He was a handsome man, a little older than her, wearing a black suit and sitting on a throne. Around him, there were about six other people, an older lady for example, who by the facial resemblance could have been his mother, and one that did not look older than eighteen. “Good morning”, T’Challa spoke in a clear voice, and once more, their arms were crossed as a greeting. For a moment, y/n was not sure whether she was supposed to do it herself, but she decided against it. After all, it could be reserved for the elders or people of importance and her doing it could be an offense which she did not mean to happen. “So this is her.” T’Challa’s eyes traveled up and down y/n, but unlike Okoye’s, they seemed friendly, almost curious. “What is your name, Fire girl?”

“Y/n Y/l/n.”

“And you had contact with an infinity stone?”

“Yes”, she confirmed, hectically adding, “Your majesty.” It earned her a smile from the king, who tilted his head. There was a pause, and y/n was once more not sure what to do. Did they expect her to elaborate on this matter? Was she only to speak when spoken to? Nervously, y/n dug her nails into her palms. Luckily, Steve continued to speak. “T’Challa, I know that I have once already asked for your favor and believe me, I would not do it again if I saw another way. I come to you today to ask you to provide a place of safety for y/n, as you so reliably did before.”

“Yes, but we froze the other one. You don’t expect us to freeze her, do you?”, the young girl had spoken, and although some approvingly murmured at her words, it was met with a sharp look from T’Challa. “Shuri, be quiet.” Steve continued. “She is strong, so I believe she would grow to be an asset for Wakanda’s safety but she cannot control her power well. She is in need of safety procedures only Wakanda can provide.”

“How do you expect us to train her?”, a middle aged man inquired, “not one of us has this power.”

“I believe she can train herself. She needs guidance in dealing with her strength, just as, I am sure, you needed guidance, T’Challa, after earning the strength of the Black Panther. But her power is unique, and she understands it, so she will be able to control it.”

‘What a lie’, y/n thought to herself, but the Captain’s words gave her confidence. “How skilled you are in the methods of rhetoric”, the older woman observed gently, “I want to believe you.”

“But we shouldn’t”, the middle aged man argued, “Our highest priority should be Wakanda. What if we cannot contain her?”

“But what if we led her go and she becomes a danger to Wakanda from the outside. What if we cannot defeat her? This way we ensure she stays on our side”, T’Challa answered. The other man scoffed. “You are naive to believe in a moment of power she remembers those who once taught her, my king.”

“I did”, T’Challa answered coldly, “and so did my father.” A short pause followed, in which y/n unclenched her hands a little. It was strange to be spoken about in room she was in as if she weren’t present, but she didn’t dare to speak. The stakes were high, and even if she hadn’t seen what security measures Wakanda had, she already felt at peace here. She’d do anything to stay. It was T’Challa who broke the silence. “And we must not forget, she carries the power of an infinity stone. If we could find a way to use it, to channel it, it would be an extremely powerful weapon.”

“I am sure I could find a way”, Shuri said cockily, “It could not be harder than the metal arm I had to make for the broken white boy.”

Her response was met with a defeated sigh from the middle aged man. “Fine”, he said, “if you want to test it, you can. But, my king”, he looked T’Challa directly into the eyes, “there is a reason why Wakanda is closed to foreigners. I believe you should reconsider.”

But T’Challa had already stood up and made his way to Steve. “We will take her, Captain”, he extended his hand, which Steve promptly shook. “Thank you”, he replied and for the first time, y/n saw relief in his face. She hadn’t realized how fragile this situation really was.

It was Shuri who led y/n away from the others after they had said goodbye to Steve, who would return to New York. They went down the tower until y/n wasn’t sure whether they were under the earth or not. It was a labyrinth of corridors and she couldn’t quite shake the feeling that they weren’t supposed to keep others out, but her in. Shuri had given her a few clothes, which y/n carried attentively. It was nothing special, a few shirts, trousers, a hoodie, some underwear, but she briefly wondered where this stuff came from. No one she had seen until now was wearing western fashion. Maybe it’s to show them, y/n caught herself thinking, how much of an outsider I really am. As if her complete lack of understanding regarding their culture didn’t make it obvious. Silently, she decided to read up everything she would be able to find about Wakandan culture. She didn’t remember ever feeling this ignorant. Shuri stopped in front of a corridor with three doors. She motioned at one of them. “Behind this door there is a small kitchen, it’s usually not used for more than coffee breaks but it has a microwave and a fridge, so maybe we can stock it up for you.” Y/n smiled thankfully as they moved down the corridor. “This one is your room. It’s quite small, but I am sure you’ll manage.”

“Thank you, Shuri”, y/n was excited at the prospect of her own room. After all, she hadn’t had one for the past five years. “Behind the last door”, Shuri motioned at the door in the back, “is your training room. I should warn you though, there is another person in there. The white man that Captain America send to us a few months back.”

“He just leaves there?”, y/n asked, before fearing something worse, “you didn’t make him move out of the room for me, did you?” “What?”, Shuri laughed, “oh you silly Fire girl. No, he’s frozen. Like a popsicle.” Of course, y/n remembered, they froze him. “God, I am admirably slow today”, she sighed, “Thank you for showing me the way.” “No problem. Can’t wait to see you tomorrow”, she opened the door to y/n’s room before handing her a small key, “We’ll wake you at eight.” And with that, she made her way back up the tower.

Y/n entered the room, which, for her, was not small at all. It wasn’t a loft, but she felt at ease right away. With the wine colored curtains and the small windows, which showed her that, in fact, they were not under the earth yet, it felt cozy. Y/n put down the clothes on her bed and her backpack on the floor. It carried the few belongings that had survived the way back to earth. Slowly, she started unpacking. A few pictures, a notebook, an old purple teddy bear and a broken watch. Initially, she had been surprised when she had found them on her spaceship but now, knowing that Clint had worked for S.H.I.E.L.D., she was almost sure he had made sure she could keep these things. Somehow that eased her hate for him. Y/n reached into the pockets of her blue overcoat and pulled out the envelope Steve had given her. It was brown and small, but it felt heavy, as if a considerable amount of paper was inside. Y/n y/l/n was written on the front, in a font that y/n would recognize anywhere. It was Clint's handwriting. She held the letter in her hands for a while before putting it on her nightstand. It had been a tough few days and she didn’t have the capacity to read it right now. Although it was merely midday outside, y/n was exhausted. She decided it would be best for everyone if she went to bed, but first, she was going to have her well deserved shower.

@broco8

[tcswritings]

MASTER DUMP.

Just a whole lot of very rough scribbles that were in my drafts. Some are lengthy, some are very short, some are super old (and partly outdated), others are somewhat recent but they all got one thing in common - I probably won’t go back to them, at least not any time soon. I really just wanna clear my drafts for now, and hey, why not share these bits? I kind of enjoy them anyway after all. xD

***

I. Untitled

(Declan tries to talk to Mick during the time of their big fight.)

***

“This is so stupid, man. We'll keep crossin’ paths after all, whether you like it or not and you don’t really wanna keep this up for all eternity, do you?” Declan asked, crossing his arms while he and the others watched Ryan unpacking the next box.

“Why are you talkin’ to me?” Mick mumbled out of the corner of his mouth. He didn’t even bother to look at Declan.

“This is bullshit, Mick!”

Mick merely took a deep breath, trying to stay calm and focussing on Ryan instead who currently struggled with the wrapping of his gift.

“I mean, I know you love actin’ like a petulant lil’ arsewipe but you could as well as just use that energy to try and forgive me?”

“Do me a favour and drop dead.”

“In sixty years, maybe. You’re gonna have to put up with me for a few more years, I’m afraid.”

“Fuck you.”

“Guys! Shhh!” Jessie hissed at her two fighting friends.

*****

“Can you please tell me what’s so funny?” The least Declan expected from Lauren was a laughing fit.

“I’m sorry!” she chuckled, doing her best to pull herself together. “It’s nothin’ personal, just the thought of my son’s father and his best friend - two grown up men - bitchin’ at each other like sum’ pre-teens would.”

____________________

II. Untitled

(Charlie and Kieran and that one evening in the O’Leary’s.)

It’s Summer 2016 and Charlie realises that her feelings for Kieran have taken a somewhat different turn as she finds herself smitten with him when they have a talk at her favourite pub in Boston.

*****

He looked thinner than the last time she had seen him, and he looked worn-out and very tired.

Not the kind of tired that a few hours of a good night’s sleep could fix, but the kind of tired that someone who had seen and endured too much within a short time would look like, someone who was silently suffering and who was bad at taking care of it.

When Charlie had met Kieran O’Connell for the first time a little more than six years ago, he had acted like an unnecessarily rude brat and there was no other way to put it. He had the questionable charm of a guy who was well aware of his good looks and who knew he was quite the catch, so to say, and she could still remember his overly confident swagger, the arrogant look on his face, his deep and penetrating voice as well as how his pale blue eyes had pierced hers when he had looked into her face for the very first time.

Despite his rudeness (and the apparent lack of manners), Charlie had thought of Kieran as a force of nature from the very beginning and it turned out that she was right - once she got to know him a little better, it became more and more obvious to her that he was actually a very passionate and spirited guy with a heart as big as the entire world and that had impressed her so much more than his cocky behaviour and she couldn’t help but grow really fond of him over the years.

Not much was left of the cocky and lively guy today, though, and while it ached Charlie to see her friend in pain - he tried his best to cover it up but he couldn’t hide it - she had felt a strange wave of affection overwhelming her right in the moment they had greeted each other with a heartfelt hug. There was sympathy, of course, but it was mixed with something else and it took her a little while to figure the feeling out.

Charlie was nervous. Anticipating. And she had been ever since they had sat down at one of the tables. Charlie had been listening closely and her heart ached for him and yet she couldn’t help but notice a little spark despite the gloomy subject. There was nothing in this world she wanted more in this moment than to be close to him and to fix the things going wrong in his life so he would smile at her again, like he always had.

“I just wish there was something I could say.” Charlie sighed. “I don’t have too much to offer aside from ‘I know how it feels.’”

“Y’ do?”

“Yeah.” she nodded. “I lost my aunt when I was 15.”

“That’s rough. You never told me about it.”

“Yeah, it’s not really a subject to keep a mood up, right?”

“Fair enough.” Kieran laughed. “What happened to your aunt?”

“Well, to be fair, she wasn’t really my aunt, not by blood at least. She was the wife of my dad’s best friend.”

“Blood or no blood, it no longer matters after a while.” Kieran said with a faint smile. “How did she die?”

“Same. Car crash. She had her little daughter with her, they both died. She was only 31, her daughter was three.”

“That’s horrible.”

“Yeah, it was. And it wasn’t even just the pain of losing them, y’know? Seeing dad hurt, seeing Adrian hurt - all of a sudden, our entire life was nothing but sadness and grief.”

Kieran let out a dry chuckle. “I know what y’ mean. Watching Ma and Pa, and also my siblings, is the worst. Like a punch to the guts. I try to come an’ see them as often as I can these days but truth is that I dread it every damn time. Sometimes it’s - I dunno. It’s-”

“Too much?”

“Too much.” Kieran nodded. “I mean, how do you even comfort the people who have raised you? What do you tell ‘em? That it’s gonna be alright? I don’t know what losing a child feels like. Gave ‘em nothin’ but grief myself for the better part of my life, I just don’t know what to do or say most of the time.”

“Do you think you have to do or say something?”

“Yeah, it’s what I think. It’s what I think any damn time I’m at home, any time my sister looks at me with her big sad eyes, like she’s at a loss at how t’ move on and any time my brother snaps at us, somethin’ he’s never done before, not like that at least. Someone has to keep this fuckin’ bunch from fallin’ apart after all-”

Kieran fell quiet as Charlie reached over the table and took his hand. It was a spontaneous reaction and Charlie already feared that she could come across as intrusive but Kieran didn’t even flinch at the gesture. He even closed his hand around hers. She squeezed it a little and a few moments later she could tell that he was starting to relax.

“I‘m sorry. Fuckin’ nerves.” he smiled.

“Couldn’t tell.” Charlie smiled back. “Relax. Breathe. You’re here for vacation. You can go back to saving your folks once you charged up.”

“I dunno, I think it takes a lot more to charge up than a few weeks away from home. Actually, I even feel like I’m running away.”

“No. It’s good you’re here. And maybe you won’t charge up right away, but you can get your mind off things for a little while. You gotta do that, y’know?”

“You think so, eh?”

“Yes, I do, and it has nothing to do with running away. You gotta take care of yourself every once in a while.” Charlie squeezed Kieran’s hand once more.

“You’re cute.”

“Well, it’s obvious that you’re not really good at taking care of yourself so I’m just trying to be the person who does it until you learn it.” Charlie cocked her head and smiled at him.

Returning the smile, Kieran brushed a strand of dark hair out of his face with his free hand. He looked at Charlie for a few more moments before he gently pulled his hand back, adjusting himself and looking around the pub. “Alright, how ‘bout we order a jug of ale, get roaring drunk and we’ll go wherever you wanna go?”

“I don’t do ‘roaring drunk’ too well.” Charlie chuckled, suddenly remembering the first and only time he had seen her in that exact state.

“Me neither. We’re already halfway there, though, and we’ll be fine, c’mon.”

“Wait, what’s that supposed to mean? I’m nowhere near roaring drunk and neither are you?”

“We could be. Anything you want, love. Let’s get our minds off things, as you put it.”

Charlie couldn’t tell what exactly caused the flutter in her stomach - the little spark in Kieran’s eyes as well as his playful smile or the term of affection. He had addressed her like that before but it meant more today than it ever had before and she felt herself all too willing to respond.

(...)

____________________ 

III. Untitled

(Orla yells at Mick for getting married in a fever.)

***

“You. WHAT?”

Orla’s outcry was followed by the distinct noise of shattering glass, causing Mick to flinch and jump back a little. He looked at the mess at his feet and then back at Orla who merely stared at him, her eyes wide, before she looked to the ground and slowly took a crouching position, proceeding to swipe the little shards together with her bare hands.

Mick could see that she was trembling and hunkered down as well. “Be careful, you’re gonna hurt yourself.” he said, but Orla merely batted Mick’s hand away as he tried to keep her from touching the glass.

“NO, don’t touch me!”

“Orla-”

“Look me in the eye and tell me that you didn’t do what I think you just said you did!” Orla’s voice cracked.

“Orla, there’s no need to freak out-”

“You can’t be married!?”

“I am, I jus' told you!”

“Oh my god.” Orla closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Still in her squatting position, she propped up her elbow on her knee, wiping her face with her hand and eventually pinching the bridge of her nose with her finger and her thumb.

Mick raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t you a bit dramatic right now?”

"Shut up!” she hissed back at him. “Don’t you dare calling me dramatic!"

“Aye, sorry, I-”

“Are you out of your mind? I mean, more than usual?!"

Mick ignored the little remark. “I don’t even know why you’re makin’ such a big deal of it-”

“Because it is a big deal! It is a Big. Fucking. Deal, Mick! You got married!” She glared at him and realised that she still had a few shards of glass in her left hand. “Ah, fuck this!” she hissed, tossed the few shards to the ground and stood up again, eventually stomping out of the room.

Mick looked after her for a few moments. Granted, he hadn’t really expected Orla to be thrilled, but he hadn’t expected her to be so furious either. Feeling a little helpless, he bit his lip, before he stood up as well and followed her into her living room. When he opened the door, he almost bumped into her. Orla swiftly turned around on the spot.

“Orla, c’mon, let’s just-”

She cut him off once more. “I don’t believe this, Mick. You come here and tell me that you just got married to this total nutcase-”

��Oi, watch it!”

“- and expect me to be, what exactly?! To be cool with it? Like it’s no big deal at all, like it’s the most natural thing ever that my best friend disappears for a weekend and comes home married, to a woman he hardly knows, without letting any of us know-”

“Orla, what the fuck is your problem?”

“You! You are my problem! For years I was the one,” - Orla pointed at herself - “who always stood up for you when anyone called you stupid or idiotic and whatnot but it’s true. They’re all right, you are an idiot and you have always been!”

Mick let out a little laugh as he now faced Orla, his eyes narrowing. “Is that all y’ have to say? That I’m an idiot?”

“Well, you must be!” Orla went on. “The only other explanation I have for this bullshit is that she must do some really amazing things in the bedroom. Does she?”

Mick let out another laugh but it wasn’t a friendly one. “Fuck this, I don’t need to justify myself.”

“No, of course you don’t. Go off, be happy, do what you want. You never cared about filling me in about this but hey, as your best friend I couldn’t be happier for you!” Her voice was dripping with sarcasm.

“How many times do I have to tell you that-”

“- that it was a spontaneous thing? Oh, don’t worry, I got that!”

“Orla-” Mick tried again after a few moments of silence, his voice soft, but Orla wasn‘t done yet.

“I mean, it is not quite what I meant when I told you a while ago that you need to work on being more spontaneous again. You could’ve started by, dunno, going on a road trip or buying a new couch or gettin’ Sasha a friend but hey, why not marry a woman you have known for six minutes? You exceeded my expectations, congratulations!”

All of a sudden, a thought crossed Orla’s mind and as it did, her heart skipped a beat and she could feel the colour rushing from her face. “Oh dear lord. She’s pregnant, isn’t she?”

Mick now closed his eyes and groaned. “Oh god, oh my fuckin’ god.”

“Answer me!” Orla spat out.

“I dunno!” he shot back.

“Wrong answer!”

Mick groaned. “I mean, I don’t think so, no?! Even if she was, it wasn’t the reason why we did this.”

“Oh my god, I would even get that, considering how you were raised and-”

“Shut up! Just shut. up!” Mick eventually interrupted her harshly. He was done being patient. “Stop psychoanalysing me, stop buggin’ me, stop doin’ whatever y’ doin’. You insulted me in every possible way within the last ten minutes and I don’t need that shit from you, not from you!”

“Well, did you expect me to be happy for you? Like you didn’t just ruin your entire life?”

“I didn’t ruin my life and no, I didn’t expect that.” Mick replied wearily. “I dunno what I expected, I just didn’t think y’ would be that much of an arsehole about everything.”

“I am not being an arsehole-”

“You’re bein’ the worst arsehole I’ve ever known right now and I’m done talkin’ about this unless you tell me what the real problem is.”

“I don’t have a problem?”

“You most certainly do. And I wanna know what it is, goddammit.”

“You’re throwing your life away for a woman you hardly know! You keep falling for all those wacko women who are terrible for you and it’s beyond me how you fail to see that-”

“Wait, just so I get this right... you can date whomever you want, for as  long or short as you want, no matter how much of a fuckwad the guy is, but once I pick someone, I need your approval?”

“That is not what I’m saying.” Orla groaned and rolled her eyes.

“So what are y’ sayin’ then?”

Orla blinked and took a breath as she put her hands to her hips, shooting Mick a harsh look.

“Has  it ever occurred to you that you make the worst choices, Mick? That  you’re complete and utter shit at getting your damn life together? You just outdid yourself! First Leila-”

“That was different-”

“-and now Mina. Why can’t you just pick a nice and stable one for once? Why can’t you just-”

“Stay alone so I can be your last resort?”

Startled, Orla looked at Mick, her lips parted in shock.

“What did you just say?” she whispered.

“I dunno, I’m merely gettin’ the impression that you like keepin’ me on a short leash but once I go off and do my own thing-”

“You have some nerve-”

“Obviously hit a nerve.” Mick mumbled.

“You’re so full of shit! Why would I want to keep you as a last resort? What kinda fucked up thought is that even? You’re my best friend!”

“Hell yes, I am, and I wouldn’t want it any other way but right now y’ bein’ the world’s worst bitch-”

“HEY!”

“And don‘t tell me that you wouldn’t have ran off with that fuckin’ Australian if he’d asked you to.”

“Yeah, maybe, but I’m glad I didn’t. All relationships start out great, you know that, but things can blow up so quickly. Even worse, sometimes one part just runs away when nothing at all happened, just like James did.”

“Just like you did.”

“What are you even talking about?”

“You ran away from me, just like that.”

“Oh my god, why are you bringing up age old stories again?”

Mick ignored the question. “Y’know what? I don’t even care. I care about makin’ this work, I can do that all by myself and I don’ need your support anyway. How about y’ just leave me be, alright?”

____________________ 

IV. Untitled

(Declan and Lauren face some unexpected trials of life.)

***

September 2014

“What about Marshall?”

“What, like the guy from that terrible sitcom?”

“Nah, like the amplifiers. Or, y’know, like Jimi Hendrix’s middle name.”

Lauren pursed her lips as she pondered the suggestion for a few moments. She eventually shook her head. “Don’t think so, no.”

“Aw, c’mon, why not? It sounds badass.”

“But I will know that the poor baby was named after either a drug addict or a huge black... block. Thanks, I’ll pass.”

“Just think about this, though: he’ll love us for the name when he eventually becomes a guitarist?”

“We don’t even know if he’s a he, Dec. Let alone whether he becomes a guitarist.”

“Come on. ‘Course it’s gonna be a boy. I mean, “ Declan shrugged, “two brothers, two nephews? We have strong genes.”

“Dear lord, no, I really don’t wanna raise a... you.” Lauren groaned as she leaned back against the wall, struggling to find a comfortable position. She was in the eighth month of her pregnancy and some things became a little tricky - such as finding resting positions that didn’t leave her sore or in pain after ten or less minutes.

“Aw, will you ever stop pretending that you can’t stand me? I mean, we both know how that came to be?” Declan gently patted Lauren’s belly before he reached over to grab one of the pillows that were piled up next to the little cupboard that he had helped her build up earlier. “C’mon, take that. You probably shouldn’t be sitting on the floor anyway, eh?”

“Ugh, it no longer makes a difference anyway. I feel and look like a whale, everything hurts and nothing is comfortable anymore. Not ever.”

As he put the pillow behind Lauren’s back, trying to make sure that she felt at least a little more comfy, Declan grimaced. He felt pretty guilty all of a sudden. “... sorry you feel like that.”

“That, uhm, was actually the part when you were to say ‘You don’t look like a whale, Lauren!’, y’know.”

“Ah, shit.” Declan laughed. “You don’t look like a whale, Lauren!”

“You’re a horrible liar but, y’know, points for trying and such.” Lauren smiled back. “It’s alright, I’m kidding, don’t worry. Looking like a whale is kinda like my least problem these days.”

“What do you mean?”

“Okay. Can I be completely honest for a second?”

“Sure.”

Lauren took a heavy breath. “I’m freaking out, actually.”

“What? Now?”

“No, not now. I mean, yeah. Also now! All the damn time! I mean, aren’t you freaking out? Not at all?”

Declan looked at Lauren and when he pondered the question in his mind he realised that, at least right now, he was quite far from freaking out. “Not really.” he replied. “I mean, I used to, yeah?”

“I know you used to. You freaked out right in the beginning and now, with due date ‘round the corner, it’s me... I dunno. I kinda don’t want this.”

“Bit late for second thoughts, I’m afraid.”

“I know! I know how horrible that must sound to you now, oh god.”

“Nah, it doesn’t.”

“I’m just wondering how on goddamned earth I thought I could be a good parent. I mean, I took the risk of getting pregnant just so I - so we could- oh god. So what’s next? Huh? Tell me.”

“Uhm-”

“I tell you what’s next. I’m gonna put Baby on the changing table and leave the room, just like that, because hey, what’s the worst that could happen, eh?”

“Okay, what are you talking about-”

“And I sure won’t bother reading about nutrition and food?! Oh hell no, I’ll just give Baby some rubbish I find in the back of my refrigerator ‘cause, I mean, it works for me, right?!”

“Oh god, Lauren, what the fuck is that about now?”

“I am stupid, Dec! I don’t think things through, I can’t possibly be a parent!”

“So what, I’m stupid, too? Kinda played my part in this, y’know.”

“Oh my god! Yes, you are stupid! We’re both stupid!”

Declan snorted. “So let’s just hope this all maybe works out like multiplication, eh? Minus times minus equals plus?”

“We’re not at school!” Lauren moaned.

“Yeah I’m kinda grasping at straws here.” Declan admitted and bit his lip. “Honestly though, it’s what I do all the time. I just hope for the best. And somehow it works?”

“But you can’t just ‘hope for the best’ when a baby is involved?”

“Huh! Just think about all those weirdos in this world who manage to raise a kid. It somehow works? My parents raised us and they’re pretty much the worst weirdos I know.”

“Is that supposed to reassure me now?!” Lauren raised an eyebrow.

“C’mon, we really didn’t turn out all too bad! ... okay, Orla is a bit weird, I’ll give you that, but three out of four is still a good rate?”

“Oh my god!” Lauren laughed.

Declan smiled at her for a few moments before he eventually put his arm around her shoulder, scooting a little closer and pressing a kiss to her temple.

“I’m not even saying that everything will be fine, I’m just saying that it’s gonna happen, no matter what, and we just kinda... have to do this.”

“My parents offered any help I need...” Lauren murmured, resting her head on Declan’s shoulder.

(...)

September 2019

(...)

“Oh man, for how much longer are they even going to be in there?!”

“Shh. It’s all good, it’s been only five minutes.” Lauren whispered.

“I don’t understand why they have to keep doing all this, it’s not like it changes, y’know... what it is.”

“They need the x-ray to check his lymph vessels, so they can eventually figure out the best way to treat him.”

“They’re clueless.”

“They’re thorough. He’ll be fine, you know they won’t harm him.”

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ, you already sound like them.” Declan scoffed.

“I don’t. Unlike you, I listened to what they had to say! Stop using that tone on me already!”

“What tone?”

“Like I have no clue what you’re going through.”

Declan could hear the bitterness in Lauren’s voice and it was when he knew he had gone too far. He couldn’t let it out on her. Of all people in his life, Lauren was the one who understood exactly how he felt and she was also the one whose company he longed for most these days.

“I’m sorry. God, I- I know I’m awful. I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay. I get it.” Lauren rested her head against his shoulder while they held each other close.

“He’s all alone in there.” Declan’s voice broke and he wiped his tired eyes with the palm of his hand. “I hate it when they take him away.”

“I know. Me too.”

“I’m freakin’ out, Lauren.”

“C’mon, let’s sit.”

“Don’t wanna sit, I want him back.”

“I know, I want the same.”

“Don’t know how it happened but I’m strangely fond of this kid.” Declan now let out a little laugh. It was a nervous laugh, one that happened because he was too scared to let out anything else at this point. Lauren knew him well enough.

“Go figure.” she replied faintly. There was silence for a few moments until Declan spoke again.

(...)

____________________

  V. Text Messages, part 1.            

Declan has created the group ‘concert shit’.

Declan has added you to the group.

Declan has changed the group image.

6:43 - Declan: Lady and Gentlemen, this is the long overdue group chat to plan our concerts and open airs. I’m sick of talking to you individually and organise shit all by myself.

6:44 - Jessie: Like you ever did that or are remotely good at that kinda stuff 😆

6:44 - Declan: Quiet Jessica.

6:44 - Jessie: No. 😂 😂 😂

6:44 - Declan: Suggestions to change the group title are not welcome btw. Concert shit is a grand name for this kind of group

6:45 - Mick: why cant we change the title

6:45 - Mick: it’s shit

6:45 - Mick: literally

6:46 - Declan: Because we can’t Michael.

6:46 - Declan: I’m the admin, I say what’s to be done.

6:46 - Mick: ya do shit man

6:46 - Mick: like I let ya tell me what to do

6:47 - Daryl: I already hate this group dynamic.

6:47 - Jessie: It’s like in real life. 😆

6:47 - Jessie: Dipso always tries to be the one who decides shit. And we just don’t let him so it’s all good? So, Clockwork Fury in Dublin? I’d be up for it!

6:48 - Daryl: When?

6:48 - Daryl: And why Dublin, why not Athlone? Aren’t they playng in Athlone this time?

6:48 - Daryl: *playing

6:48 - Declan: I didn’t even know they are touring. Found them kinda lame last time tbh.

6:49 - Mick: they ARe lame

6:49 - Mick: Im out

6:49 - Mick: road trip to dublin tho

6:49 - Mick: like 2017

6:49 - Mick: for gojira

6:49 - Mick: I WANT a noTHER ROAD RIP

6:49 - Mick: TRIP lol

6:50 - Daryl: I still have nightmares and flashbacks from that trip. How much are tickets for CF, Jess?

6:52 - Jessie: 30ish, I think. I’ll order next week, I’m definitely gonna go and I’m taking Harper.

6:53 - Daryl: You guys are serious now?

6:53 - Jessie: I dunno. Yeah? I guess? 😂

6:53 - Jessie: The woman needs some good taste in music HONESTLY. And, I mean, she agreed to come and to be open about more future concerts and planning stuff together kinda means we’re in relationship land!? I mean, is that even a good sign?

6:54 - Daryl: How would I know? I’m shit at that stuff. 😂

6:55 - Jessie: Does Patti know you’re shit at that stuff? xD

6:55 - Daryl: She’s had first hand experience for three months now so yeah, I assume she does. She kinda seems to like me enough. 😂

6:55 - Jessie: Yeah why she’s a KEEPER?! 😜

6:55 - Jessie: Told ya that if you mess it up, I will gladly take her.

6:56 - Declan: what the fuck??

6:56 - Daryl: Thanks Jess but I think I’m gonna keep her myself. :D

6:56 - Declan: last time I checked this chat was called ‘concert shit’

6:56 - Declan: NOT ‘RELATIONSHIP SHIT’

6:56 - Declan: y’all are annoying with your relationship shit.

_________________

VI. Sailor Man

March 2020. The days are getting longer, the air is getting warmer and Orla just met a handsome sailor from overseas. Her friends are very, very curious.

***

“So, who was that guy last night?”

“Can we maybe not talk about last night? I still feel horrible.” Orla sounded tired and as she rubbed her temples, she let out a faint sigh.

“Ah, sweetheart, don’t worry. You got tipsy, so what?” Rosamund waved off. “All I could complain about is that you didn’t spend your money here at my place, as usual.”

“Honestly, I don’t even know what happened.” Orla groaned. “I was at the tattoo studio, and all of a sudden this incredibly sexy guy in a sailor uniform comes in. Tall, broad, dark hair, gorgeous tan, tattooed all over, bright smile, cute dimples... and that’s when I, well. I kinda stopped thinking.”

“A sailor uniform?” Patti asked. “You’re dating a sailor?”

“We’re not dating, we have met only yesterday! He wanted to get a little tattoo that would remind him of his stay here. I think Harper noticed that I was... , well, that I was a bit into him and pointed him in my direction and I told him that I was only the apprentice but he didn’t care, he wanted the tat anyway so I did it.”

Orla looked around. Rosamund, Declan and Patti all stared expectantly at her. She frowned but eventually shrugged and went on.

“Well, we went out afterwards, we had a snack, I showed him around, he told me he was from Detroit... annnnd we hopped some bars, I got tipsy, and at some point he kissed me, and I got even more tipsy.... and then we got here and I said some really terrible things to Mick and... oh god, Mick.” Orla groaned, closing her eyes and burying her face in her hands. “I somehow need to sort that out.”

“Ah, not now, though.” Patti interfered. “A sailor, wow. I mean, is he a sailor or just some weirdo who likes dressing up as one?”

“Oh, he is a sailor, darling. Such a sailor.” Rosamund closed her eyes and smiled, still charmed by the cheer memory of the guy.

“And he’s definitely an upgrade to Pizza Pete.” Declan nodded.

“Don’t call him Pizza Pete!?” Orla snapped.

“He referred to himself as Pizza Pete?! Don’t try to cover that he was the unfunniest... blandest boyfriend you ever had.”

“It’s the way you said it. Don’t be so condescending. Pete was cute and... well, I got fifty percent off my next order after any time we, uh... we met.”

“Ugggh...” Declan wrinkled his nose and looked away.

“Fifty percent? You were screwing that guy and all you got was lousy fifty percent? What a cheapskate.” Patti exclaimed, clearly appalled.

“It’s better than nothing- what, no, I don’t wanna talk about Pete now? My head’s still spinning, y’all need to leave me suffer in silence, please.”

(...)

_____________

VII. Untitled

(I don’t even know what this was supposed to be, lol. Sean turns 53 and the family celebrates?!?!?! Also, this must be set in 2013 since Orla and Mick are a thing here, haha.)

***

“I still don’t know how y’all convinced me to celebrate my 53th birthday.” Sean O’Connell laughed. “It’s not an even number or somethin’ after all.”

“Well, we need some kind of excuse to stuff our faces and get drunk during daylight?” his daughter suggested, rasing her glass to her father. “Cheers, Da!”

“Cheers, sweetheart. Like you ever cared about that.” Sean replied and he nearly lost it at Orla’s dumbfounded expression.

“When did I ever get drunk during daylight? I don’t do that!” Orla seemed appalled.

“You did. With Ma.” Declan chimed in. “Like, two weeks ago.”

“You did what?” Next to Orla, Mick raised his eyebrow, suppressing a smile.

“Uhm no, that was just-”

Sean laughed heartily now. “No no no, no need to justify yourself, kid, that was hilarious. I loved how you two sang along to- what was it again?”

“Daaaad!” Orla moaned.

“The Moulin Rouge soundtrack! After all those years it’s still wonderful!” Sarah noted.

“Oh yeah.” Declan noted with an eyeroll. “So wonderful.”

“Glad I wasn’t around for that.” Malachy mumbled next to him.

“You should be. It was ugly. Very, very ugly.” Declan mumbled back at him. “Earshattering. Frightening.”

“Oh god, can you just stop being arseholes and-” Orla interfered but Sarah just shook her head.

“C’mon, sweetheart, it’s not our fault that all these lil’ fuckers here have no idea how to spend a good time, eh?”

Orla pursed her lips for a bit and eventually nodded. “You know what? Right you are, Ma. Y’all are just boring. We should do it again, I think. Right here. Right now.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake, don’t.” Malachy spat out. “I don’t need any nightmares later.”

“You are a nightmare.” Orla shot back. When she saw that her boyfriend was still looking at her with his eyes wide in apparent confusion, she groaned. “Don’t look at me like that? I promise, I won’t burst out singing songs now.”

“Whatever,” Mick answered. “There could be worse after all.”

Malachy snorted. “Jesus Christ, congrats!” he said into Orla’s direction. “Apparently love ain’t just blind, it’s also deaf.”

“I mean, Mick, you know she can’t sing, don’t you? ‘Course you do.” Declan added.

“Ugh, c’mon, Dip, what am I supposed to say now? She’s sittin’ right next to me.”

“At least he’s not blatantly lying!” Sarah chimed in. “I like that! Very promising!”

“Y’gotta learn that, tho.” Declan said. “Relationships are all about sugarcoating and tellin’ each other weird cute-sy shit just so the other one ain’t pissed all the time.”

“Aye, I’m, uh, not gonna take that note, don’t mind me.” Mick raised an eyebrow.

“Good boy!” Sarah nodded. “You two will do just fine, I’m sure.”

“Yeah, just don’t take any tips from Declan.” Malachy added.

“Hey!” Declan protested. “I give great advice.” He turned to Mick and Orla again. “Mark my words, man, in a few years, when the two of you have three weird kids and are miserable all the time, you’ll be longing for my piece of advice.”

“No one is having weird kids!” Sarah chimed in. “Hopefully.” she added quietly, but still loud enough that both Mick and Orla now shared a startled look.

(...)

__________________

.... that’s it, I guess. Sanne out. :’D

[markwhyareyousodaddy]

Roommates (Part 1?)

Summary: When you’re forced to rent out your extra room, Im Jaebum was the last person you expected to have to share your living space with… luckily, he keeps things interesting.

Genre: romance, hot roommate (I think i just made up this genre???), prbly smut later tbh (sorry)

Word Count: ~1000

A/N: Hey guys/gals/all!!! Okay so this is my first ever like real original content so it may be a lil rough but let me know what you think and all that fun stuff!!! I’m thinking about continuing it and adding some… ya know… but it will all depend, so for rn it’s all pretty chill.  Also special thanks to @jaybleep​ bc Julia helped motivate me enough to do this and I 10/10 recommend following her if you don’t already!! 

UPDATE: Part 2 is now posted! 

UPDATE (AGAIN): So is Part 3! (and now Part 4!) 

“No, really, it’s fine Jen. I completely understand. I could never ask you to turn down a job offer like this,” y/n said, sighing into the phone.

“I’m so sorry,” Jen began, “I feel awful backing out on you like this, especially knowing how steep the rent is going to be without me”. She allowed her fingers to absentmindedly trace the rim of the coffee mug sitting in front of her while apologies continued flooding through the phone. After being inseparable since 6th grade, the two were both excited to finally share a small house together. It took months of searching, but eventually they stumbled upon the perfect place… well, what was the perfect place.

“It’s only for a little while, I promise. My boss says the move will be a year, max. Then I’ll come back and we can live the way we’ve been planning to!” Jen chirped, her speech optimistic and excessively bright. Y/n knew her friend’s overly happy tone was just a strategy she was implementing as an attempt to cheer both of them up, but it did bring her some comfort regardless. 

“You’re right, you’re right. I think I can manage for that long,” she teased, trying to hide the still-lingering disappointment from her voice. Jen had been working in the same accounting firm for a few years now, and had been offered a higher-paying position if she was willing to temporarily relocate to Cincinnati. The idea of being without her for such an extended period of time was difficult to think about, but y/n knew this was an opportunity of a lifetime for her best friend. 

“Thank you so much for understanding, y/n. You’re the best. I have to go, but text me if you need anything.” The friends exchanged quick goodbyes before hanging up on one another. She cleared her mug and now-empty plate from the table, dumping the remainder of the lukewarm coffee and rinsing her dishes off before placing them in the sink. Silence filled the air around her, and morning sunlight streamed in through the windows. Although the house was already beginning to feel a little more like home, y/n was quickly beginning to realize it wouldn’t be the same without her best friend there to share it. Deciding not to dwell too long on the phone call, she surveyed the floor littered with boxes before walking over and plopping down in the center of the chaos.

*** 

Four hours and twenty boxes later, a majority of the unpacking was done. Filled with a sense of accomplishment, y/n stood up and strolled to the freezer for a well-deserved serving of ice cream.  As she passed her phone sitting on the kitchen counter, she noticed a series of texts left over two hours ago from Jen.

I don’t know how, but I totally forgot to mention that I found someone to take my room in the house!! I’ve got so many things going on rn, it must have just slipped my mind. 

His name is Jaebum. I don’t know him, but he’s my older brother’s friend from college and needs a place to stay for a while I guess.  

Apparently he’s pretty cool and won’t cause too much trouble for you. He’s looking to move in tomorrow actually (sorry I literally suck, I have no idea how I forgot about this???), so just lmk if it’s alright with you and I’ll give him the okay

Y/n’s thoughts were soon clouded with worry. Before she’d even been given the chance to fully process the idea that Jen would no longer be her roommate, she was already getting a new one… and one of the opposite sex, for that matter. The idea of a guy living in such close proximity made her uneasy. After all, she had been expecting to lounge around in her extra large pajama shirt all day on Sundays, and be able to walk freely down the hallway without pants on. Surely she couldn’t do those things with a stranger present. Even worse, the possibility of him being a horrible human being loomed in her mind. Granted, Jen’s brother usually had nice enough friends, but there was no saying what this one would be like. Before y/n got too lost in her own thoughts, she punched out a simple “sure” to Jen, deciding it would be best to let him move in tomorrow instead of waiting anxiously for a few more days. Fear overwhelmed her, and she nearly threw her phone across the room after hitting send, not wanting to look at Jen’s response and face the reality of it all. 

***

After a long night, y/n was jolted awake at 7:30 by the chiming of the doorbell. Dragging her feet, she shuffled down the hall, wondering who in their right mind would want to move in this early in the day. When her hand finally brushed against the brass knob of the door, she flung it open.

“You know,” she began while yawning and clearing the sleep from her eyes, “you didn’t have to…” her voice caught mid-sentence as she suddenly forgot how to breathe. Standing in front of her was a man slightly taller than average height, combing his dark hair back with his fingers, which were adorned with a few silver rings. Although he was dressed in a simple blue t-shirt and dark jeans with a black backpack casually slung over his shoulder, he still looked like something out of a magazine. He waited to see if she would finish her statement before awkwardly clearing his throat and offering his hand.

“So… I’m Jaebum. You must be…”

He was stunning, almost too much to take in at once. His even skin was a light toffee color with a slight pink tinting the full lips that graced his face. She noticed several hoops peppering his ears while his narrow, deep brown eyes gazed intensely at her, waiting for the response she should have given thirty seconds ago instead of observing him like he was a piece of classical artwork.  

“Y/n,” she replied, practically choking on her words.

“Y/n…” he repeated tentatively, lowering his outstretched hand and giving her a concerned look. “Well, uh, nice to meet you I suppose. Is it alright if I start to move my things in, or are we going to stand in the doorway all day?” he chuckled. After a few more silent moments, she wordlessly stepped back and raised her arm, motioning him inside.