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lgbtqareads · 5 years ago

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15 Books I Want To Read That are Releasing in the Next 6 Monthes

Every six monthes, I am excited to see the new LGBTQA+ YA books of the next monthes and while thos December, I was a little weirded out to not find them on B&N Teen previews, I was happy to see that Dahlia Adler posted her lists and opinions at lgbtqreads.com. So, of course I went through and narrowed the list from 72 to 34 to 15, only choosing books that I felt I really wanted to read and not just fall for all the amazing synopses and covers, which let's be honest, are all truly masterpieces.

But enough introduction. Let's get into my to be bought (and read) list of the first six monthes of 2020:

We Used to Be Friends by Amy Spalding - JANUARY 7TH

Goodreads Synopsis: Told in dual timelines—half of the chapters moving forward in time and half moving backward—We Used to Be Friends explores the most traumatic breakup of all: that of childhood besties. At the start of their senior year in high school, James (a girl with a boy’s name) and Kat are inseparable, but by graduation, they’re no longer friends. James prepares to head off to college as she reflects on the dissolution of her friendship with Kat while, in alternating chapters, Kat thinks about being newly in love with her first girlfriend and having a future that feels wide open. Over the course of senior year, Kat wants nothing more than James to continue to be her steady rock, as James worries that everything she believes about love and her future is a lie when her high-school sweetheart parents announce they’re getting a divorce. Funny, honest, and full of heart, We Used to Be Friends tells of the pains of growing up and growing apart.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Relationship breakups may be heavily covered in YA, but friendship breakup stories are still few and far between. Enter the story of James and Kat, two girls who were once beyond close and now watch their friendship unravel as college nears. Things are complicated for both girls: James’s mother has left her and her father for another guy, and she doesn’t know how to talk about it, not even to Kat or her still-too-present ex, Logan. Kat’s discovering that her feelings for her new friend Quinn aren’t strictly “friendly,” and in fact, she’s realizing she’s bisexual and falling head over heels for a girl. It’s a bittersweet story to be sure, and while it definitely has its fun scenes, close moments, painful familial interactions, and tingly romance (what Spalding book doesn’t??), you’ll spend much of the book wishing you could push the characters together and say “Just talk already”…but isn’t that exactly how life goes?

My Opinion: As someone who has been through too many friendship breakups to count, this read is going to be devastating. But I put this book on my list for one reason: the synopsis made it feel so much like life that I couldn't help but feel that the story would pull me into James and Kat's universe and tear my heart into pieces. I absolutely cannot wait to have my heartbroken.

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The Gravity of Us by Phil Stamper - FEBRUARY 4TH

Goodreads Synopsis: As a successful social media journalist with half a million followers, seventeen-year-old Cal is used to sharing his life online. But when his pilot father is selected for a highly publicized NASA mission to Mars, Cal and his family relocate from Brooklyn to Houston and are thrust into a media circus.

Amidst the chaos, Cal meets sensitive and mysterious Leon, another “Astrokid,” and finds himself falling head over heels—fast. As the frenzy around the mission grows, so does their connection. But when secrets about the program are uncovered, Cal must find a way to reveal the truth without hurting the people who have become most important to him.

Expertly capturing the thrill of first love and the self-doubt all teens feel, debut author Phil Stamper is a new talent to watch.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: This is a lovely and bighearted debut chock full of space nerdery, big dreams, new beginnings, and social media scandal. Cal’s life is completely uprooted when his dad shocks them all by being chosen for a space mission, something his family had never taken seriously as a lifelong dream. Worst of all, he’s forbidden from documenting life in the new compound, forcing him to leave his massive social media following behind. On the bright side, there’s Leon, son of another astronaut on the program and immediate thief of Cal’s heart. But when things go awry in the program and secrets are revealed, Cal will have to decide exactly what he’s willing to do to get the truth out there, and who he’s willing to lose.

My Opinion: Social Media? Media circus? Texas? NASA? First loves? And a choice that could implode Cal's life from the inside? The name Cal? Other than Texas, a state which I hate, all of this adds up to something good, hopefully so good that I can forget that Texas is involved at all. So, basically, it has to reach Red, White, and Royal Blue levels, which is the only book so far that has made me like Texas at all. But I trust that it will do well. Plus it was reviewed by 4 of authors on my queer bookshelf - Becky Albertalli, Adam Silvera, Shaun David Hutchinson, and Caleb Roehrig. Bonus points for not being a graphic novel like I feared it was.

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Only Mostly Devastated by Sophie Gonzales -MARCH 3RD

Goodreads Synopsis: Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda meets Clueless, inspired by Grease.

When Ollie meets his dream guy, Will, over summer break, he thinks he’s found his Happily Ever After. But once summer’s ended, Will stops texting him back, and Ollie finds himself one prince short of a fairytale ending. To complicate the fairytale further, a family emergency sees Ollie uprooted and enrolled at a new school across the country—Will’s school—where Ollie finds that the sweet, affectionate and comfortably queer guy he knew from summer isn’t the same one attending Collinswood High. This Will is a class clown, closeted—and, to be honest, a bit of a jerk.

Ollie has no intention of pining after a guy who clearly isn’t ready for a relationship. But as Will starts ‘coincidentally’ popping up in every area of Ollie’s life, from music class to the lunch table, Ollie finds his resolve weakening. The last time he gave Will his heart, Will handed it back to him trampled and battered. Ollie would have to be an idiot to trust him with it again.

Right? Right.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Grease goes gay YA in this rom-com about two boys whose dreamy summer fling comes crashing into a harsh reality when our lead, Oliver, transfers to Will’s school thanks to a family crisis-driven move, only to find out Will isn’t Out and isn’t about to be. As Ollie finds his own ways to settle in, he can’t seem to shake Will’s presence. But whether there’s a future for them remains to be seen. This sophomore novel is warmly delightful and delightfully warm, with some tears on the side for the aforementioned family crisis, and some hard-earned queer solidarity is the icing on the cake.

My Opinion: The last musical-ly queer book I read was What If It's Us? so Ollie and Will have a lot to live up to, but it gets points for getting an Instagram shoutout from Becky Albertalli herself. From the synopses, it sounds like a case of strangers to lovers to strangers to maybe friends to maybe something more and hopefully a happy ending, but what I look forward to the most is rewriting Summer Nights as I read this book.

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Super Adjacent by Crystal Cestari - MARCH 17TH

Goodreads Synopsis: Claire has always wanted to work with superheroes, from collecting Warrior Nation cards as a kid to drafting "What to Say to a Hero" speeches in her diary. Now that she's landed a coveted internship with the Chicago branch of Warrior Nation, Claire is ready to prove she belongs, super or not. But complicating plans is the newest WarNat hero, Girl Power (aka Joy), who happens to be egotistical and self-important ... and pretty adorable.

Bridgette, meanwhile, wants out of WarNat. After years of dating the famous Vaporizer (aka Matt), she's sick of playing second, or third, or five-hundredth fiddle to all the people-in-peril in the city of Chicago. Of course, once Bridgette meets Claire-who's clearly in need of a mentor and wingman-giving up WarNat becomes slightly more complicated. It becomes a lot more complicated when Joy, Matt, and the rest of the heroes go missing, leaving only Claire and Bridgette to save the day.

In this fresh and funny take on the world of supers, author Crystal Cestari spotlights what it's like to be the seemingly non-super half of a dynamic duo with banter-filled romance and bold rescues perfect for readers seeking a great escape.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Claire is a superhero fangirl, a card-carrying member of Warrior Nation. And when she finds an unexpected way (with some unexpected help) into winning an internship with the Chicago WarNat branch, it should be everything she’s ever dreamed of. But that unexpected help is proving very difficult to work with; it’s in the form of Girl Power (aka Joy), the newest hero and a pain in Claire’s butt. A very, very cute pain in Claire’s butt. But distraction or no distraction, Claire’s determined to prove herself, especially when she and Bridgette, a WarNat, who’s tired of being “the girlfriend” to an even more famous hero, decides to mentor her and they end up having to be exactly the heroes Chicago needs.

My Opinion: Two words. Super. Heroes.

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Music From Another World by Robin Talley - MARCH 31ST

Goodreads Synopsis: It’s summer 1977 and closeted lesbian Tammy Larson can’t be herself anywhere. Not at her strict Christian high school, not at her conservative Orange County church and certainly not at home, where her ultrareligious aunt relentlessly organizes antigay political campaigns. Tammy’s only outlet is writing secret letters in her diary to gay civil rights activist Harvey Milk…until she’s matched with a real-life pen pal who changes everything.

Sharon Hawkins bonds with Tammy over punk music and carefully shared secrets, and soon their letters become the one place she can be honest. The rest of her life in San Francisco is full of lies. The kind she tells for others—like helping her gay brother hide the truth from their mom—and the kind she tells herself. But as antigay fervor in America reaches a frightening new pitch, Sharon and Tammy must rely on their long-distance friendship to discover their deeply personal truths, what they’ll stand for…and who they’ll rise against.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Talley is one of queer YA’s most prolific genre jumpers, but she seems to be making herself beautifully at home in historical with this follow-up to 2018’s Pulp, again set amid a context of vital queer American history. This time around, it’s 1977, and Tammy Larson would love more than anything to come out of the closet as a lesbian, but that’s a major no-go where she lives. Her only outlet is to write “letters” to the activist Harvey Milk, at least until she’s matched with a pen pal to whom she can write letters for real. Sharon makes for a much better companion than Tammy’s diary, and she can sympathize, given her brother is gay and feeling all the same misery in the wake of Anita Bryant’s leading to a successful repeal of their protections. Together they’ll find their own brand of activism and learn to fight back against a world of hate.

My Opinion: Ever since reading Annie On My Mind by Nancy Garden, I have been craving more historical sapphic girls. With Pulp in my Kindle library and this in my future shopping cart + Casey McQuiston's time traveling book in 2021, I am bound to get a fix for that craving soon. Hopefully, it will also cure heartbreak.

Loveless by Alice Oseman - APRIL 2ND

Goodreads Synopsis: The fourth novel from the phenomenally talented Alice Oseman – one of the most authentic and talked-about voices in contemporary YA.

Georgia feels loveless – in the romantic sense, anyway. She’s eighteen, never been in a relationship, or even had a crush on a single person in her whole life. She thinks she's an anomaly, people call her weird, and she feels a little broken. But she still adores romance – weddings, fan fiction, and happily ever afters. She knows she’ll find her person one day … right?

After a disastrous summer, Georgia is now at university, hundreds of miles from home. She is more determined than ever to find love – and her annoying roommate, Rooney, is a bit of a love expert, so perhaps she can help.

But maybe Georgia just doesn’t feel that way about guys. Or girls. Or anyone at all. Maybe that's okay. Maybe she can find happiness without falling in love. And maybe Rooney is a little more loveless than she first appears.

LOVELESS is a journey of identity, self-acceptance, and finding out how many different types of love there really are. And that no one is really loveless after all.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Oseman’s crossed the pond before with Radio Silence, so this American’s fingers are crossed she’ll do it again with her newest, about a girl named Georgia who’s struggling with the fact that she’s eighteen and has never had so much as a crush. She’s sick of people thinking she’s broken or weird, and it isn’t like she isn’t into romance; she’s just not into it for herself. When she gets to university, she thinks maybe she can “fix” things with her roommate’s help. But what if it turns out there’s nothing to fix, and Georgia’s great and perfectly capable of happiness just as she is?

My Opinion: Alice Oseman has written a-spec characters before, but it's possible that this seemingly aromantic character will be the one that I'll read first. Not to say Radio Silence wasn't amazing, I just wouldn't know. But I can't wait to find out when I read it after I read this one. And then maybe her other books too.

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Verona Comics by Jennifer Dugan - APRIL 21ST

Goodreads Synopsis: Jubilee has it all together. She’s an elite cellist, and when she’s not working in her stepmom’s indie comic shop, she’s prepping for the biggest audition of her life. Ridley is barely holding it together. His parents own the biggest comic-store chain in the country, and Ridley can’t stop disappointing them–that is, when they’re even paying attention. They meet one fateful night at a comic convention prom, and the two can’t help falling for each other. Too bad their parents are at each other’s throats every chance they get, making a relationship between them nearly impossible . . . unless they manage to keep it a secret. Then again, the feud between their families may be the least of their problems. As Ridley’s anxiety spirals, Jubilee tries to help but finds her focus torn between her fast-approaching audition and their intensifying relationship. What if love can’t conquer all? What if each of them needs more than the other can give?

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Dugan debuted with one of my absolute favorite queer YA rom-coms (seriously, if you haven’t yet read Hot Dog Girl, do yourself a favor), so I’m thrilled to see her returning with another one, this one an m/f pairing where both halves of the couple are bi (or, more accurately, one is bi and one is still figuring it out). [Jubilee] is an elite cellist with a major audition coming up and a side job working at her stepmom’s indie comic shop. Ridley works at his parents’ comic shop too, only theirs is a big chain, and no friend to the little guy. Which makes it a little difficult when the two meet at a comic-con prom and immediately hit it off, despite their family feud. I’ll take Romeo & Juliet with a much happier ending and heaps of bisexuality any day, wouldn’t you?

My Opinion: Romeo and Juliet retelling + comic convention prom + bisexuality + indie comic shops = a recipe for me to like a book.

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When You Get the Chance by Tom Ryan and Robin Stevenson-MAY 5TH

Goodreads Synopsis: [Edited] Cousins Mark [from the East coast of Canada] and Talia [from the West coast of Canada] go on a road trip to Pride in Toronto as they search for love and adventure and uncover family secrets along the way.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: One of the things I’m often asked to recommend is books that feature mlm and wlw solidarity, and I especially love giving answers that show it not just in characters but in authorship. Here, two Canadian rock stars of queer YA come together with a story about cousins named Mark and Talia who are reunited from their respective Canadian coasts after a death in the family and decide to take a road trip together to Toronto so Talia can see her non-binary partner and Mark can get to Pride. The two don’t have much in common, and they’ll have to let Mark’s little sister tag along, but they both know some kind of magic awaits them in TO, and they can’t wait to get there.

My Opinion: There is too much to love about this book. Canada! WLW or WLNB/MLM solidarity! Canadian road trip! Road trips in general! Canadian Pride! PRIDE IN GENERAL! A nonbinary s/o! TORONTO, CANADA! And family secrets! Plus it gives off You Know Me Well vibes, and that's one of my favorites.

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The Extraordinaries by T.J. Klune - MAY 5TH

Goodreads Synopsis:

Some people are extraordinary. Some are just extra.

Nick Bell? Not extraordinary. But being the most popular fanfiction writer in the Extraordinaries fandom is a superpower, right?

After a chance encounter with Shadow Star, Nova City’s mightiest hero (and Nick’s biggest crush), Nick sets out to make himself extraordinary. And he’ll do it with or without the reluctant help of Seth Gray, Nick’s best friend (and maybe the love of his life).

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Klune’s doing double duty this year (or maybe even more? Damn, it’s hard to keep up), following up an adult contemporary fantasy with his first entry into YA, about a boy named Nick who happens to be the Extraordinaries fandom’s most popular fanfic writer, and who aims to be even more extraordinary when he meets the hero he’s been crushing on. (But maybe he’s in love with his best friend, Seth? It’s complicated. It’s always complicated.)

My Opinion: What can I say? I'm a sucker for books about fanfic writers. And for best friends to lovers stories, so hopefully this is one, and not a fan-dates-hero story.

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The Summer of Impossibilities by Rachel Allen - MAY 12TH

Goodreads Synopsis: Skyler, Ellie, Scarlett and Amelia Grace are forced to spend the summer at the lake house where their moms became best friends.

One can’t wait. One would rather gnaw off her own arm than hang out with a bunch of strangers just so their moms can drink too much wine and sing Journey two o’clock in the morning. Two are sisters. Three are currently feuding with their mothers.

One almost sets her crush on fire with a flaming marshmallow. Two steal the boat for a midnight joyride that goes horribly, awkwardly wrong. All of them are hiding something.

One falls in love with a boy she thought she despised. Two fall in love with each other. None of them are the same at the end of the summer.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Allen’s been a personal favorite of mine since her subversive feminist debut, 17 First Kisses, and I’m thrilled to see her releasing her first queer YA, which basically looks like a gay Traveling Pants except not all the girls actually wanna be spending the summer together at the lake house where their moms became besties. Most of them can’t even stand their moms right now. All of them have secrets. And two of them…well, two of them are in love with each other, so one way or another it’s gonna be a hell of a summer.

My Opinion: Look, I'm going to be honest, I saw that it was co.pared to Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants and I immediately added it to my list. Plus, strangers to friends to lovers? I love.

Date Me, Bryson Keller! by Kevin van Whye - MAY 19TH

Goodreads Synopsis: What If It's Us meets To All the Boys I've Loved Before in this upbeat and heartfelt boy-meets-boy romance that feels like a modern twist on a '90s rom-com!

Everyone knows about the dare: Each week, Bryson Keller must date someone new--the first person to ask him out on Monday morning. Few think Bryson can do it. He may be the king of Fairvale Academy, but he's never really dated before.

Until a boy asks him out, and everything changes.

Kai Sheridan didn't expect Bryson to say yes. So when Bryson agrees to secretly go out with him, Kai is thrown for a loop. But as the days go by, he discovers there's more to Bryson beneath the surface, and dating him begins to feel less like an act and more like the real thing. Kai knows how the story of a gay boy liking someone straight ends. With his heart on the line, he's awkwardly trying to navigate senior year at school, at home, and in the closet, all while grappling with the fact that this "relationship" will last only five days. After all, Bryson Keller is popular, good-looking, and straight . . . right?

Kevin van Whye delivers an uplifting and poignant coming-out love story that will have readers rooting for these two teens to share their hearts with the world--and with each other.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: If this book looks like the cutest, fluffiest, most make-you-melt kind of romance, it’s because it is…at least in the little romantic bubble that ensued when when Kai took advantage of a dare that requires Bryson Keller to agree to date the first person to ask him out every Monday morning for that week. But outside the bubble, the world is still wondering who Bryson Keller’s mystery girlfriend is, the one person not to shout from the rooftops that she’s got the guy. And Kai isn’t gonna be the one to tell them it isn’t a girl at all; his spontaneous request made Bryson the first and only person he’s ever come out to. But when both the answer and Kai himself are forcibly outed, he and the boy he’s come to fall for, the boy who’s only just realized he himself is gay, will have to band together and put their relationship through the ultimate test.

My Opinion: A lot of these books are comparing themselves to Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, and this one's even comparing itself to To All the Boys I've Loved Before, so it's basically setting me up for disappointment, but I will admit, I am judging this book by it's cover, and that smile is too cute to resist.

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I Kissed Alice by Anna Birch - MAY 26TH

Goodreads Synopsis: For fans of Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda and Fangirl, I Kissed Alice is a romantic comedy about enemies, lovers, and everything in between.

Rhodes and Iliana couldn't be more different, but that's not why they hate each other. Hyper-gifted artist Rhodes has always excelled at Alabama's Conservatory of the Arts despite a secret bout of creator's block, while transfer student Iliana tries to outshine everyone with her intense, competitive work ethic. Since only one of them can get the coveted Capstone scholarship, the competition between them is fierce.

They both escape the pressure on a fanfic site where they are unknowingly collaborating on a graphic novel. And despite being worst enemies in real life, their anonymous online identities I-Kissed-Alice and Curious-in-Cheshire are starting to like each other...a lot. When the truth comes out, will they destroy each other's future?

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Sign me the hell up for literally every enemies-to-lovers f/f rom-com, but especially this one, where the girls who hate each other at Alabama’s Conservatory for the Arts have no idea they’re falling for each other online as they collaborate on a graphic novel for a fanfic site under their online identities. That’s…everything I love in book? Yep, pretty much!

My Opinion: This one is on my list because Alice is basically my favorite sapphic girl name ever after my rewrite of the song, All the Girls Love Alice. Unfortunately, neither girl is named Alice, but it does seem to involve something about Alice in Wonderland. Maybe the graphic novel they're creating is a queer retelling of the classic story? Can't wait to find out.

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Six Angry Girls by Adrienne Kisner - JUNE 2ND

Goodreads Synopsis: A story of mock trial, feminism, and the inherent power found in a pair of knitting needles.

Raina Petree is crushing her senior year, until her boyfriend dumps her, the drama club (basically) dumps her, the college of her dreams slips away, and her arch-nemesis triumphs.

Things aren’t much better for Millie Goodwin. Her father treats her like a servant, and the all-boy Mock Trial team votes her out, even after she spent the last three years helping to build its success.

But then, an advice columnist unexpectedly helps Raina find new purpose in a pair of knitting needles and a politically active local yarn store. This leads to an unlikely meeting in the girls’ bathroom, where Raina inspires Millie to start a rival team. The two join together and recruit four other angry girls to not only take on Mock Trial, but to smash the patriarchy in the process.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Kisner is three for three in putting gloriously queer YA on shelves, and I am in love with the idea of this newest, which takes the famous “Twelve Angry Men” and situates it in Mock Trial with an ace lead. Raina’s killing it at life, until suddenly she isn’t. Millie’s in a similar spot, having just been ousted from the all-male Mock Trial team. When the two pair up to start a rival girls’ team, it isn’t just their opponents they’re gunning for—it’s the whole motherfluffin’ patriarchy.

My Opinion:

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The State of Us by Shaun David Hutchinson - JUNE 2ND

Goodreads Synopsis: The State of Us is the story of Dean and Dre—the 16-year-old sons of the Republican and Democratic candidates for President of the United States—who fall in love on the sidelines of their parents' presidential campaigns.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis: Tis the year for political YAs, for obvious reasons, and this contemporary romance also does double duty of being a touching demisexual coming out story that happens to take place across the aisle. (The political aisle, that is.) When Dean, the son the of the Republican candidate, and Dre, son of the Democratic candidate, find themselves locked in close quarters, they’re surprised to find that they quite enjoy the company of someone else who knows what it’s like to be in the junior spotlight. Soon, romance sparks, which is a bit of problem considering the whole “opponents” thing, not to mention Dean still trying to figure out how to deal with and discuss the fact that he’s demisexual. But someone out there seems determined to make their problem much, much bigger, and they’ll have to figure out who wants their relationship outed, how they can make it work, and how they can reconcile a future.

My Opinion: While unfortunately this love story has no Prince from England or Wales, this book is definitely in the same genre as Red, White, and Royal Blue, though of course Dean and Dre will be more YA than our favorite international political couple. No matter what, I can tell I'm going to love the angst in this one.

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The Falling in Love Montage by Clara Smyth - JUNE 9TH

Goodreads Synopsis:

Saoirse doesn’t believe in love at first sight or happy endings. If they were real, her mother would still be able to remember her name and not in a care home with early onset dementia. A condition that Saoirse may one day turn out to have inherited.So she’s not looking for a relationship. She doesn’t see the point in igniting any romantic sparks if she’s bound to burn out.

But after a chance encounter at a house party, Saoirse is about to break her own rules. For a girl with one blue freckle, an irresistible sense of mischief, and a passion for rom-coms.

Unbothered by Saoirse’s rulebook, Ruby proposes a loophole: They don’t need true love to have one summer of fun, complete with every cliché, rom-com montage-worthy date they can dream up—and a binding agreement to end their romance come fall. It would be the perfect plan, if they weren’t forgetting one thing about the Falling in Love Montage: when it’s over, the characters actually fall in love… for real.

Dahlia Adler's Synopsis:

Love books that make you laugh, swoon, and cry? Then you are going to fall head over heels for Smyth’s debut, an Ireland-set romantic contemporary about a girl named Saiorse who’s losing her mother to early-onset dementia and is determined never to get involved with anyone as a result…until she meets Ruby, and all bets are off. The girls agree to a no-strings-attached summer of just the good parts of romance, the movie montage where the couple does all sorts of fun things as they fall in love. But when the end of the summer comes, will they be able to let go?

My Opinion: The falling in love montage is my favorite part of love stories and I can't wait to read one set in Ireland! No strings attached? I don't think so Saiorse and Ruby. If they aren't together by the end of the book, I'll be tying the strings myself and writing fanfiction for days. I've only had one relationship that would qualify for a falling in love montage, most likely because I've only been in love once, and that's... ended, so I need something to fill my heart and this book just might be it.

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Check out @lgbtqreads for more recommendations and check out the link at the top of the post for the rest of the list!

#we used to be friends amy spalding #the gravity of us phil stamper #only mostly devastated sophie gonzales #super adjacent crystal cestari #music from another world robin talley #loveless alice oseman #verona comics jennifer dugan #when you get the chance tom ryan & robin stevenson #the extraordinaries tj klune #the summer of impossibilities rachel allen #date me bryson keller! kevin van whye #i kissed alice anna birch #six angry girls adrienne kisner #the state of us shaun david hutchinson #the falling in love montage ciara smyth #2020 reads #lgbtqareads book recs

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regrettablewritings · 8 years ago

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How to Be a Good Catholic, Pt. I (Sonny Carisi x Reader)

AN: “I am a shit Catholic,” I think to myself, continuing to eat my steak burrito on this previous fine Good Friday. “The shittiest Catholic,” I insist, unable to get up to attend Easter Sunday Mass after pulling an all-nighter. This goes out to all the other shit Catholics/Catholics who are trying but not always consistently succeeding. Disclaimer: The examples listed are somewhat inspired by my own experiences. Well, some of them are. I am, in no way, saying that these necessarily apply to everyone. But if these sound eerily familiar, welcome to the sorority/fraternity, we have habits. Literally! (Happy belated Easter!)

@ohbelieveyoume and @xemopeachx (special shoutout to the latter for dealing with my running Catholic things by her!)

PART 2 HERE

As the only son in a household of three girls, Dominick “Sonny” Carisi Jr. had a few extra expectations placed on him besides being an absolute gentleman of God. Specifically, that he meet, fall in love with, and bring home a good Catholic that would win over his parents and sisters and then marry said good Catholic. It was in Sonny’s hopes that you would be that very person: You were sweet, patient, smart, funny, had a good head on your shoulders, could at least recite the Lord’s prayer . . . Okay, maybe it was the bare minimum, but considering what few people he was able to meet outside of his busy schedule, you were the best. Besides, it helped that you liked him right back. Enough, in fact, to agree to date him and do so quite happily for the last couple months. Maybe it was a short period to become so optimistic, but Sonny couldn’t help it: You were, in a word, wonderful.

This description, among plenty of others, was what ran out of your boyfriend’s mouth when he finally took you home to meet the folks, six months into the relationship.

“ – and then this one over here,” Sonny gently patted your shoulder, proud smile in place, “before I could even do anything, she just books it and tackles the guy after a block’s worth of running!” The rest of the Carisi clan broke out into amazed laughter, causing you to blush and smile. You directed your vision to your hands, neatly folded in your lap so as not to pluck at the cloth placed over the dinner table.

Not to jinx it, you couldn’t help but note, but things are going surprisingly well thus far.

You never wanted to buy into stereotypes, but sometimes the one about Italian mothers being protective of their sons seeped into your thoughts, particularly due to Sonny’s occasional light reference of such.

“She may say bring up what church you go to,” Sonny had warned you before. “And by ‘may’, I mean as certain as Barba is certain to hit the scotch tonight.” Dang. You sincerely hoped that she didn’t have a personal vendetta or anything against Our Lady of Merciful Embrace, then.

Apparently, she did not as she had yet to fling any accusatory glances your way or ask any questions that would put you on the spot. She, alongside Mr. Carisi, Bella, Gina, and Theresa, had been all smiles and hugs the entire evening. Of course, you also had to thank Sonny for hyping you up and continuously highlighting your more interesting features like a good salesperson. Though you initially had some hesitancies about him recounting the story on how, during your second date, you chased down and tackled a purse-snatcher out of pure spite . . .

You mustered up enough confidence to cut through your shyness, allowing you to lift your head up and see the riot attempting to be tamed.

Dominick Sr. wiped his eyes free of laughter-induced tears, coughing out rhetorical queries of how “such a lively woman would go for a scrawny noodle like Sonny.” To which, your blush would only deepen, tightening your face into a coy smile. Sonny, on the other hand, remained quite proud of his father’s apparent approval at the cost of a slight jab at his own person. The evening was going well. Too well.

It had to end sometime.

Mother Carisi began to swallow down a few giggles, having decided that the end of the little retelling would be the perfect time to begin dinner.

“(Y/N), would you like to lead us in grace?” she requested. An innocent enough invitation, albeit one that made you nervous simply out of the principle that you would be under observation. But as you made the sign of the cross and prepared to close your eyes, you saw your beloved boyfriend in your peripheral vision, granting you one last smile of pride in you. You were thankful that Sonny had been blessed with an all-inspiring smile. It was almost as if he truly was emitting light and you were the flower he had graciously decided to give all of his energy to.

The appreciation did not go unnoticed. In fact, it translated itself into confidence, resulting in you delivering grace with finality: “God is grace, God is good. And we thank him for our food. Amen.” You didn’t say it quickly, nor did you stretch it unnecessarily. It wasn’t a long prayer of thanks, and therefore you felt no nerves when you repeated the sign of the cross and lifted your head.

You did, however, feel nerves when you noticed six pairs of eyes focused on you. Some were in heads that were still somewhat bowed but the fact that they were directed at you was undoubtable. The essence of slight confusion held within them was also quite blatant. The cold disconnect in the reception of your recital provided a cold front, removing the warmth and confidence that Sonny had previously instilled in you.

Trying not to visibly close back in upon yourself, you uttered a quiet, “. . . Did . . . Did I do something wrong?”

To which, Mother Carisi’s head rose completely, gently waving her hands to show a negative. “Oh, no! No, sweetheart, you did fine, it’s just . . .”

“It’s just not how we usually do our grace,” Dominick Sr. explained. It wasn’t in a cold way or even accusatory. Just as it was: a matter of fact.

“Oh . . .” You knew you were going to regret asking but – “So then how do you say grace?”

“Bless us, O Lord, and these gifts which we are about to receive from thy bounty,” Gina offered. She bit her bottom lip as if unsure as to whether it was in her place to finish it. When nobody objected, she completed, “Through Christ our Lord. Amen.”

“Amen,” the Carisi clan murmured in unison. You, too, uttered an amen, though one so incredibly quiet that no-one seemed to take notice that it occurred after their collective one. And even if anyone had, the temptation and richness of the meal Mother Carisi had put together stomped it out of complete acknowledgement. At least, to the others.

You continued to sit prettily, humor stories in your sheepish demeanor. Sonny continued to be proud of you. If Sonny was, indeed, the sun and you were, in fact, a flower, you felt as though you would’ve been the kind that closes up after being exposed.

“That went great. They love ya!” Sonny exclaimed. You hummed a response that suggested being neither here nor there and continued to pinch the foil on the edges of the plates on your lap. Mother Carisi insisted that you take plenty of food home and that if there was a particular dish you liked, to come right over and get the recipe. She was a very nice woman with a very nice family. So why did you feel off?

This became a question worth asking in Sonny’s mind as well, much to your dismay. As much of a goofball as he could be, Sonny was still a detective – he was already used to observing behavior from far more heinous figures; figuring out his girlfriend was bothered by something was child’s play.

“Hey,” he asked, taking his eyes off the road to quickly glance at you. “What’s the matter?”

You had two options: Say that nothing was wrong and potentially ruin the evening by pushing Sonny away; or be honest. Damn your good girl behavior.

“I messed up grace,” you pouted.

“That’s what this is about? C’mon, nobody cared about that. Besides, you didn’t mess anything up, you just . . .” Sonny shrugged, “did . . . something a little differently . . . But it’s fine, it’s fine.”

“My parents never even really taught me the version you guys use . . . They just said that the ‘God is grace’ one was good enough. Heck, I don’t even remember learning that grace in Sunday school!”

“Really?” Sonny questioned. “Huh . . . I remember my folks drilling that into our heads. An’ then Sunday school’d seal the door shut so that there’d be no chance of it ever seeping out. But – ” another shrug “ – everybody’s experience is different. No harm done. What matters is that your heart was in the right place. And that Ma likes you. Almost as much as my dad does.”

“You sure about that?” you questioned. Why couldn’t you leave well enough alone? “Because I may not know your mother very well, but I do know mothers in general: They have a tendency to mark down each and every one of their children’s significant others’ screw-ups. It’s only a matter of time before that little slip with grace comes up in a discussion about how I’m a bad Catholic.”

“Hey,” you heard your boyfriend begin sternly. “Ma isn’t like that, I promise. But seriously, there’s no such thing as a bad Cathhhh – ” He dragged the word to a pause. There was that instance with the sex trafficking members of the Church. And an unfortunate but still widely acknowledged amount of scandal . . . Plus, there were plenty of awful people who professed themselves to follow the Catholic doctrines of faith.

“There’s no such thing,” Sonny repeated carefully, “as being a bad Catholic just because you say your grace a bit differently. That’s just ridiculous.”

“Yeah, to you, maybe!” you whined. “You’re a friggen Level 10 Catholic on a scale that only goes up to 12!”

“I wouldn’t say that – ”

“And I’m still stuck Level 4!”

“(Y/N),” Sonny sighed. He managed a quick look at you before turning back to the road. “Listen: It’s not a matter of being a ‘good Catholic’ or even being Catholic at all! I chose you because you’re a great person and I love a lot of things about you. An’ on top of that, you try. That’s literally the most I could ask for. So please: stop worrying about something that doesn’t even require worrying! Ma giving you her cannolis to take home? That’s a sign of approval!”

You sucked in your bottom lip and worried it between your teeth. For as good of a sales person as Sonny had been earlier, he sure wasn’t making you purchase anything he was insisting upon now.

Not noticing, he went on, “So long as you’re not being the type of gal I arrest, you’re doin’ fine. I swear it.” He threw in that light-causing smile for good measure and you threw a weak one of yours back, even if you knew he couldn’t see it too well when he allowed himself to quickly look towards you. You were thankful that he couldn’t better observe your expression. If he could, he would’ve known that you were still beginning to bubble with worry. But, then again, you had never had the most pristine image of self. Maybe he was right? Maybe you were a good Catholic after all . . .

1. Attend Mass on a regular basis, not just for Christmas, Easter, and Mother’s Day

So the fact of the matter was that, yes, you had been raised Catholic. However, your family was nowhere near as hardcore as Carisi’s. Your family sort of did the basics: go to church as much as possible, make sure you at least practiced the rituals up to First Communion, and try to see how things would play out from then. But for the most part after you got deeper into your teens, most extracurricular stuff depended on you and your increasingly busy schedule. By the time you’d finished college, you’d become what some might call College Catholic: if there wasn’t a near enough Catholic church or one whose commute towards was too ridiculous to complete on a regular basis, you mostly relied on visits home and maybe an occasional dip into the Good Book itself for your spiritual nourishment.

“Besides,” you’d come to argue, “God is everywhere. I shouldn’t need a building just to talk to him.”

You didn’t dislike Mass, but you were definitely amongst the population who understood that it wasn’t always the most entertaining place to be. Of course, the argument for that would’ve been that church wasn’t there to entertain you, it was there for worship and community. Fair enough. But that didn’t mean you were going to pretend to be enthralled by the sermons and the feeling of guilt that was practically thrust upon you with every visit. Add that in with the exhaustion of adult life and how little free time you got, and the deal you’d set up for yourself was that if you woke up an hour before 11 o’clock services at Our Lady and could still feel your feet you would attend services. Unfortunately, with your craptastic sleep schedule and in ability to get up after three alarms, this deal was scarcely followed through with.

You thought you’d be doing yourself and your spirituality a favor by agreeing to go with Sonny to his church the morning after dinner with his folks. You even convinced yourself that attending 9 o’clock service would be good for you, or that it was a deserved punishment for not attending even the later services on a regular schedule.

But then you opened your eyes and, without thinking, released a hiss of displeasure as the morning light enthusiastically groped your eyeballs. And, with equal brightness, your boyfriend knocked on your apartment door, ready to pick you up. You almost wanted to punch him for being so damn pleasant, even as he waited patiently for you to finish getting ready.

“You don’t need to get dolled up,” Sonny insisted. Though he certainly didn’t seem to mind it, looking you up and down as you entered the living room, dressed in a white dress with a blue flower pattern and pearls. You didn’t think it was too much, but it was just classy enough to hopefully avoid getting whispered about.

You clumsily offered a smile. “Well, they call it ‘Sunday best’, don’t they?” You inwardly sighed at the sight of Sonny nodding with agreement. If you could get through this service, you’d be one step closer to being the good girl you could approve of. And who knows? Maybe church with Sonny would be great, simply because he was there with you.

2. Recite the Nicene Creed during Mass

You tried not to jiggle your leg. Tried so hard not to tap your feet against the hard tile floor. But lord almighty (no pun intended), if the droning that had been occurring for the last half hour didn’t make you feel on edge. It was weird how restrictions worked: Normally, you weren’t an excessively mobile person if you could help it. But the moment you were expected to sit still and keep quiet? That was when you were suddenly convinced you needed to run a marathon and monologue Shakespeare.

You looked at your boyfriend to see how he was holding up and immediately regretted it. You should’ve known that Sonny, born and raised in church, would have become skilled in the art of keeping stellar composure. His figure was postured as though he’d receive nourishment with every word that flowed beyond the pulpit, hands folded carefully on the back of the pew before you two without a single finger twitching or tapping from anxiety over being stilled. Beautiful, blue eyes focused intently on the speaker, Sonny didn’t seem tempted to observe his surroundings at all, no desire to find refuge from boredom in the stained glass depicting saints and martyrs.

You were able to snap yourself out of your reverie just in time to hear an aged voice say the particular line that insinuated the next part of Mass: the recitation of the Nicene Creed. You made a pleased smile within yourself upon this acknowledgement: You knew the Nicene Creed like the back of your hand, it was practically Pavlovian at this point.

And so, like the good Catholic Sonny knew you were, you began alongside the rest of the congregation:

“We believe in one God –” you began.

“I believe in one God –” Sonny and the rest of the congregation began.

You froze. I?

“ – of all things seen and unseen –” you continued.

“ – of all things visible and invisible – ” the others continued.

From your peripheral vision, you could just barely make out Sonny returning the gesture: A side eye of interest. But whereas you had complete confusion mixed into your glance, Sonny’s held curiosity. You whipped your eyes back to the jacket-wearing back of the gentleman standing in front of you and creased your brows by a millimeter.

“We (I) believe in one lord Jesus Christ – ”

“ – begotten, not made, one in being with the Father – ”

“ – begotten, not made, consubstantial with the Father – ”

Oh, ffffffffffffffflubbernuggets. Was that an okay thing to think in the Lord’s house? Flubbernuggets? Who cares? When the crap did they change the Nicene Creed!? It was then that you realized that you might’ve been off your Holy Game even longer than initially surmised. On top of that, out of all the things the Catholic Church needed revisions on – that was the thing they thought needed to be updated the most!? You tried to keep the confusion and growing frustration about this decision off of your face for the rest of Mass.

Sonny made this particularly hard when, during the exchanging of the sign of peace, he placed a peck on your cheek and whispered, “A traditionalist, I see?” You wondered if St. Lucy would’ve minded it if you threw yourself through the nearby decorated window made in her image. It wasn’t like she looked at it constantly to become attached to it or anything . . .

. . . It was at that moment you realized that could be taken the wrong way and simply wanted to crawl under your pew and die.

3. Go through with Confirmation

“Hey, Counselor, whaddya think?” Sonny beamed, bringing his briefcase into view. Barba barely glanced at it before looking back to the case files he’d just been handed. And he was hoping for a quieter day at the office, too . . .

“. . . What am I looking at here?” came the dull response.

Sonny’s brows creased, though his smile remained ever present. “Whaddya mean? I got it monogrammed! See?” He pointed to the strip of leather upon which the metal clasp was attached. D.O.G.C.

“. . . ‘Dog C’?” Barba questioned after deciding to humor his follower.

“Very funny,” Sonny replied dryly. “Anyway, no, it’s – ”

A gentle knock sounded from behind the office door before opening to reveal you as the source.

“Sorry ‘bout the wait, Mr. Barba,” you offered, ushering yourself in. “The line for Danishes was ridiculous.” You placed a paper bag containing the confectionaries on the edge of his desk away from any files that could be damaged by the sticky oils.

“It’s fine. In fact, you came in just in time: Go distract your boyfriend, he’s going on about this,” Barba waved a hand dismissively, “case.”

“It’s monogrammed, just came in last night!” Sonny stated proudly.

“Oh, neat!” you replied, eager to share his enthusiasm. You observed the lettering: “Dominick Orsino . . . What’s the ‘G’ for?”

“Confirmation name: Genesius. Patron saint of lawyers.” You hummed and nodded.

“And comedians,” you noted.

“How fitting,” Barba threw in, not looking up from his work.

Ignoring Barba’s usual third-party heckling, Sonny inquired how you knew that bit.

“Well, when I was looking at Confirmation names, I took it as an opportunity to memorize weird saints. Like Denis or Agatha.”

“Neat! So what’s yours?” The curiosity glittered in Sonny’s eyes, as if you had a secret to share. It was therefore disheartening for you to feel your stomach bubble at the realization of what he was getting at.

“Pardon?”

“Your confirmation name, what is it?”

Crapolla. You placed your hands together, tapping the tips against one another as if their padding would drown out the similar thumping of your embarrassed heart. It shouldn’t have made you nervous at all, it was just a name. But, considering where you were in your process comparatively, the fact that it was a name you didn’t even have just felt . . . wrong. Particularly in that it was your completionist Catholic boyfriend who was asking for it.

“ Oh, uh . . . I . . . neverwentthroughwithit,” you blurbed.

You watched the curiosity dim. As if it were on one end of a teeter-totter, the other end rose within you: Guilt.

“Pardon?” Sonny asked. It wasn’t harsh or anything of the sort. It was only in a tone that any person would use if they’d misheard something. If only you could convince yourself that this conversation was, in fact, as regular as it probably was.

“I never went through with it,” you mumbled. “Confirmation, I mean. I just . . . I’unno, there was never any real time . . .” Your voice trailed as you came to realize how lame that excuse sounded. No time to advance your spirituality and connection with the church? No time to attempt to exempt yourself from eternal damnation? You made time for that! As you began to rub the back on your arm, you started to wonder if attending drama club and babysitting services were worth it if they meant keeping you from religious extracurriculars.

“Oh,” was all Sonny had said. You noted that there wasn’t any disappointment, giving you temporary space to feel less bad about yourself.

“It’s probably for the better,” stated Barba, who’d taken an opportunity to look up from his work once more. “Giving yourself a Confirmation name just gives your mother one more sign that she’s angry with you. Can’t tell you how many times I had to hear ‘Rafael Iachimo Eduardo.’ You dodged a bullet, (Y/N).”

Before you could even offer a complimentary smile to suggest humor, Sonny snapped his fingers.

“I got it,” he said, “Rose. (Y/N) (M/N) Rose (L/N).”

You and Barba stared at the man incredulously. “Rose?” you questioned. Sonny nodded, quite sure of himself.

“Patron saint of flowers, but was known for her beauty. I think it sounds fittin’ for ya.” He threw in a smile that mingled together pride in his claim, and absolute flirtation. And with that adorable grin of his, the temporary safe haven he’d created closed, dropping you back into the pit of shame. Damn him for being so (and perhaps too) accepting. It made you feel a little less lovely than what he was implying.

You weren’t sure whether Barba’s request that you two “continue your flirting elsewhere” was a good thing or not, being that it broke the moment but also allowed Sonny to ask if you’d join him for lunch. You tried to spend the rest of your hour together feeling like the name he thought would suit you, only to once again feel like a wilting flower.

4. Go to Confession regularly

You had always been a bit iffy about Confession, even as a child. But the reasons had shifted as you grew. When you first started out, you just felt nervous at the idea of telling anyone your sins. Feelings of guilt you’d attempted to bury from stealing your classmate’s cookie during snack time, or lying to your mom about brushing your teeth before bedtime would all arise with every whisper you gave to the listening priest. You didn’t like the feeling of being ashamed.

As you grew older and more skeptical of authority, this unease with the practice became more passionate out of the recognition that these priests were human. This, aside from the acknowledgement that water was wet, became one of your most pointed cases: Humans, no matter what position in life, were all capable of blackmail. Even though you had no desire to commit anything tremendously questionable or heinous, you had even less of a desire to trust someone with such sensitive information.

By the time you’d reached adulthood, it simply became that you didn’t agree with the suggestion that only Catholics were capable of salvation due to their practice of Confession. If God was truly all-loving, then it didn’t make much sense that he would limit his children for their decision to not tell some other bag of flesh about what they’d done when they could simply talk to him about it and ask for his forgiveness.

Sonny, apparently, had never faced the temptation of deterring from the ritual. Or, at the very least, he had never experienced one of the same caliber as you had. The man went to confessional every month as advised. Twice a week alongside frequent visits to services if a case was becoming particularly grueling on his spiritual state. You figured maybe there was something that you, in your adolescent hesitancy, had caused yourself to miss. Maybe Confession was like certain foods: You dislike them as a child but, as you grow, your tastes shift and it becomes more bearable. Only one way to find out.

“You know, you don’t have to do this,” Sonny insisted for the umpteenth time that day. You huffed in response, attempting to speed your steps up as the cathedral came into view. Back before all of this Catholic guilt (before you even started dating!), you had voiced your feelings on Confession. It was not in the form of a critique, but more so an admission as to why you had your qualms about it with a conclusion that while it was not for you, you could understand if someone else found comfort in it and commended them for upholding a potentially strenuous ritual.

For this, Sonny was grateful and tried to return the favor by not pushing you to partake. It was therefore somewhat puzzling to the man when that evening you mentioned needing to stop by the church on your way home to do Confession. Well, puzzled and suspicious. After he questioned you sternly as to whether you had committed someone drastic, followed by your insistence that you’d done nothing wrong and simply wanted to give the practice another go, he calmed. Somewhat.

“I mean, if you’re really about this, I won’t hold ya back,” Sonny offered. You wordlessly marched up the stairs. Your mind had been made.

“Why do you sound so against it?” you muttered lowly.

“I’m not against it,” Sonny maintained as he followed you up the cathedral steps. “I just remember how you once said that you didn’ really like Confession or anything. And to be honest, this just seems a lil out of the blue. I figured maybe this might have something to do with the dinner?” Balls. Balls to him and his beautiful, supportive spirit that made him analyze the shit out of you.

It took everything in you not to freeze up and confirm your datemate’s suspicions. Rather, almost everything; there was just enough in you to keep you moving as well as to create a smile that was meant to assure, but contained cracks if one knew where to look.

“Sonny,” you managed to giggle, stopping outside of the doors. “This has nothing to do with the dinner.” Yeah; it has to do with the fact that that dinner made me realize I need to up my God Game. “I’m allowed to change, right? Besides, you always seem so fulfilled after attending Confession, I wanted to see what I was missing. It’s been some time since I’ve done it after all.” Sonny pressed his lips until they flattened into a line of uncertainty. Yours, however, remained curled with attempted spontaneity as you grabbed the door handle and began to pull the heavy wood towards you. “I’ve done some growing; maybe something about it’s changed for me.”

Nope, you thought to yourself. Same old cramped, musty box. You had to remind yourself not to swing your legs in the confession box, convinced that doing such a juvenile thing would be frowned upon in a container symbolic of repentance. That, and if you weren’t mindful enough, your feet would hit the confessional door and make a thud that would surely resonate within the spacious sanctuary. You didn’t need Sonny, standing outside, to become frazzled at a sudden booming. You sheepishly looked at the gated window to your side and tried your best to hold back a scoff. All these years and this was still the highest method of keep anonymity for these situations, huh? Thank God the Church decided that it was the Nicene Creed that needed updating, and not the Medieval equivalent of a witness protection filter that served as a barrier.

You felt a little bad for thinking these thoughts when you took a moment to analyze them. Maybe you could tell Father about them? . . . Oh, crap. What were you going to tell the pastor!? You had been so intent on proving a point by attending Confession that you’d actually failed to really conclude what you were going to confess! It wasn’t like you were sinless, you knew that much. But there was no way in anything that you were able to release the cavalcade of corruptions that you had accumulated over the years. You needed something simple, something that would ease Father in to your sordid life. Something to make you sympathetic enough so that once he got the dirty details, he’d feel too awful to use them as blackmail –

“Good evening, child,” came a warm, elderly voice from behind the gated window. In all your worrying, you failed to recognize that Father Murphy had taken his place in the opposite section of the box.

“U. . . Good evening, Father,” you responded back. Disliking how nervous you sounded, you reminded yourself over and over that he’d heard plenty of nervous voices before and that you were making a mountain out of a mole hill over this entire thing.

“What brings you in this day?” Father Murphy inquired.

But what if making a mountain will help in reaching Heaven!?

“Oh, Father,” you began. You wanted to smack yourself for coming off so dramatically. “I have committed a sin and am taking responsibility to beg for forgiveness.”

“Very good. Might I ask what sin you have committed?” . . . Well, crap.

“I-it’s . . . Uh . . .” It was at that moment that you realized being put on the spot in the House of the Lord was different from being put on the spot at your job. More feelings of damnation if you’d have to place a finger on it.

In the midst of your stammering, you heard the priest offer, “Take your time. These things can come with difficulty, child.”

Dangit, why does he have to be so nice about it!? you wanted to scream. How the heck did Sonny do this every month? Had you ever even seen him commit a crime!?

. . . Wait a second!

“Father, I stole: My boyfriend had saved a cannoli for himself for after work and I couldn’t help myself – I ate it!” Dammit. And it’d sounded so good in the heat of the moment. You were a grown woman; why were you coming in here with a confession children in Sunday School used? Before you could stop yourself, you added in, “I went out and bought a new one for him, though. Walked six blocks in the evening so he’d have a cannoli ready for him as soon as he stepped a toe through the door.”

If you didn’t know any better, you could’ve sworn you heard Father Murphy huffing to supress a chuckle.

“I see . . . Indeed, stealing is a crime. Though, I must commend you for taking responsibility and setting things right – ”

“I also snuck a bag of cherry sours from a bodega into the movies once because I didn’t want to pay the unreasonable concessions price,” you weakly blabbed.

“That, uh . . . It’s against theater protocol but I wouldn’t call that a sin necessarily.”

“Oh.”

As you exited the confession box, you caught sight of Sonny kneeling in a pew. Apparently he figured that so long as you were doing your thing, he could do his own and get a word in. That, or he felt obligated to as the feeling of pulling out your phone in even an empty church was too awkward.

“Hey,” he chirped after performing the sign of the cross. Lifting himself off of the kneeler, he resumed his place by you. “So, how’d it go? Didja get what you were lookin’ for?”

You bit your bottom lip and cast your eyes to the side. “Well . . . Maybe I still need some time trying to figure out where I stand with confession.”

“Ehh, that’s fine,” Sonny shrugged. He placed an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close with an affectionate nudge. “C’mon, it’s getting late out. Maybe we’ll stop and get Chinese on the way back.”

You smiled. “Sounds good.” A beat as you began to walk towards the sanctuary doors. “. . . I also got a mad craving for cannoli,” you whined.

“We can stop for that, too, then.” Good old Sonny. Sonny, who was apparently nice enough to avoid corrupting the sanctity of confession to ask what you told the priest as his keen hearing picked up the sounds of snickering from the confession box as the two of you walked down the aisle.

#this piece is the longest piece of fail #21 pages you guys #21 pages of this literal self-drag piece #dominick carisi x reader #sonny carisi x reader #sonny carisi imagine #sonny carisi imagines #svu imagine #svu imagines #law & order svu imagine #law & order svu imagines #law and order svu imagine #law and order svu imagines #Regrettablewritings

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bugheadotp · 8 years ago

Note

Prompt: Jughead and Betty secretly get married ( they are still in high school) and are trying to hide it.

That sneak peek called for some fluff so I hope you enjoy!

This is also my 1000 post :)

Obviously A/U and quite long. Also remember this is fiction from my imagination aka I can choose whichever direction I want to take it

Also shoutout to @betsforsythetrash for the help

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Being married as a teenager was not the life Jughead Jones ever thought he would have but none the less, there was was standing with Betty Cooper (now Jones) at his side and he couldn’t be happier.

Growing up Jughead always had a soft spot for Betty; she would bring him extra food for lunch, pay for his burgers at Pop’s and when his dad was running late to pick him up from school, she would beg her mom to let her stay longer to keep him company. Over the past year the pair had become closer hanging out with each other at every possible moment.

One weekend Jughead had taken Betty to visit his mom & sister in Toledo with him to formally introduce the blond as his girlfriend. Jellybean was over the moon with the news as well as Gladys who also had a fondness towards Betty. JB had taken Betty to her room for “girl talk” when Gladys brought up the Cooper family. “How do they feel about you being a couple?” she asked

“They actually like me. It may have taken a while at first but they do like me enough to feed me most nights” Jughead scratched his chin “or maybe it’s a ploy to kill me” he added in his usual sarcastic manner

His mom threw the nearest item (which was the cloth used to dry the dishes) and added “so you love the girl huh?”

Jughead looked down at his fingers and started playing with the wrapper from his water bottle “yeah mom I do. I never thought it would happen let alone with Betty but she’s the one. I don’t know how to describe it but I can just feel it.” Jughead looked up at his mom who was smiling at the door behind him

“you love me?” he heard from behind and turned to see Betty who had changed into her home clothes. She walked towards his place at the kitchen island.

“I’ll leave you two to it” and with that Gladys left the room

“Jug?” Betty’s voice brought him back to reality “you really love me?” he nodded in reply. “Why? How? Juggie why me?”

“Why not you Bets?” he replied “you are an incredible person, kind, caring, loyal, loving and best of all” he took her hands in his “an amazing cook”

Betty laughed slightly, tears forming in her eyes “Jug please”

“Betty don’t cry please. I stand by it and so much more about you. I don’t care what anyone else thinks or says.”

“I love you too Jughead” Betty said wrapping her arms around his neck leaning into him “more than I ever thought I would be able to love anyone else. You’ve helped shape me into who I am now and I don’t want this to ever end” her voice got caught.

Jughead looked into her eyes for a while before saying “So it won’t.” She gave him a pointed look “we’ll stay together. Forever.” As if a lightbulb had just gone off above his head “hold on” Jughead got up from his seat and went up to his mom’s room where she was sitting on her bed with JB. He quickly returned with one had behind his back and got on one knee “marry me Elizabeth Cooper.” He produced a ring that his mom used as costume jewelry, it had a silver band with a green stone that matched her eyes. He looked into them searching for a response.

Betty nodded “yes” and Jughead enveloped her in a hug, the pair holding on to each other as if their lives depended on it.

The following day had gone by in a flash. Gladys and JB had congratulated the two with the promise that the latter will be a bridesmaid. Jughead & Betty had set of back to Riverdale early in order to talk to Alice & Hal. Jughead knew that the Cooper parents liked him and were now happy with him dating their youngest daughter but getting married was a whole other story. From what he knew about the elder couple, they too had been high school sweethearts so he hoped they would understand.

Jughead pulled up outside the house and jumped out to help Betty out of the car and the two walked up hand in hand to the front door. On the drive down, they had decided that Betty shouldn’t wear her ring until she had her parents approval which took a lot of persuading on Jughead’s behalf “I want to do this right Betty. I want to make sure you will always have your mom & dad in your life” he’d pleaded to an even more stubborn than usual Betty Cooper. The compromise had been that she wears the ring on right hand instead.

Upon entering the house, Betty headed straight for the kitchen where her mother and father were eating. The Cooper parents looked shocked to see them “You’re back early, is everything okay?” Hal asked

“Everything’s perfect. I’m heading up to my room” Betty replied and kissed both her parents on the cheek, gave Jughead pointed look and left the room.

“Did you need something Jughead?” Alice asked indicating to the empty chair between her and Hal

“Actually I did” Jughead sat down “as you know I love your daughter very much, I have done for many years. The first time I saw her, I knew she was special, IS special. Over the past year, she’s made me realize just how special family is to her. How important you both are to her. My mom’s already said yes to this and I know my dad will in a heartbeat so..” he paused taking a breath “with your permission, I would like to marry your daughter.”

Hal looked at Alice with an amused look “He wants to marry our daughter.”

“I heard that Hal but which one” she looked at Jughead trying to hide her smile “we do have two daughters you know” They saw the look of panic the teenagers face “we’re kidding Jughead but marriage is a big responsibility especially for teenagers.”

“I know Mrs Cooper but I have a plan. Fred let me move into the garage last month so I’d have my own space. It’s not anything fancy but it’s our own space. I’m going to work at the book store after school and on weekends to earn enough for a deposit for somewhere to live. We’re going to make this work” he looked between both parents “I love her too much for it not to.”

Alice nodded at Hal as if they would communicate without talking “we’ll say yes with a couple of conditions” Jughead nodded profusely “you’ll allow us to loan you money for the things you need. I know how stubborn you Jones men are when it comes to help” Alice continued “We would expect it back at some point of course”

“Of course” he replied without hesitation

“we have mandatory family meals once a week either here or at your place and grades will remain at the highest standard, for both you and Betty.”

Jughead nodded “Thank you, thank you so much” The parents stood and made their way to where he was now standing and they hugged him.

The teenage boy headed upstairs to see Betty who was now sitting on her bed with Polly. Jughead walked in wearing a big smile and nodded towards Betty who ran into his arms, he lifted her up and twirled her around. Polly got up from the bed and walked towards the newly engaged couple, placing a hand on both of their arms “congratulations guys”

“Thanks Pol” Betty replied for them both and Polly walked out. “One more person left to tell” Betty said looking into Jughead’s eyes

“Bets my dad loves you already. He’s gonna be over the moon for us” the girl nodded “we should go now.” The pair went downstairs stopping for the Cooper parents to congratulate the two and they set of for the trailer park.

Walking into FP’s trailer and not being greeted with the smell of alcohol was something Jughead was still trying to get used to. FP Jones was sitting on the couch watching TV when they walked in, he got up and hugged his son and kissed Betty on the cheek. “Can I get you anything?” he asked as he made his way to the kitchen

“No thanks Mr Jones” Betty replied

“It’s FP now, especially if you guys are getting married.” The couple looked at each other in shock “did you really think both Gladys & Alice weren’t going to tell me?” he asked keeping a neutral face

“Dad I’m sorry we didn’t tell you sooner…” the younger Jones started but was cut off by his dad

“Are you kidding? I’m not mad about that. I’m over the moon for you guys but Jughead I wish you would have told me. I have something to give you. Both” he disappeared into another room for a few moments coming back with a black velvet box and handed it to Jughead who opened it with Betty looking over his shoulder. “This ring was my mothers. She and my dad were married for 68 years before he passed. Mom left this for you in her will, said it’ll bring health and happiness and eternal love.”

Jughead looked up at his dad and hugged him tight. The elder man wrapping one arm around him and opening the other for Betty, the three of them stood like that for a while. They broke apart, the younger boy got down onto one knee and re-proposed. It was the start of a new journey

The wedding was held the following Saturday with only family present. During the week the Cooper-Jones families had arranged all the necessary paperwork for the wedding, found a cheap apartment not too far from the families or school and Gladys & JB had even moved back into the trailer for the week as a trial.

Held in the park where the couple had met for the first time as infants and were married by Razor, a serpent who had been ordained for his sisters wedding. The reception was held at their new apartment comprising of food from Pop’s. So far it was furnished with a bed, couch and tv but the couple didn’t need anything else. They spent the rest of the weekend painting the walls and unpacking their belongings.

By the time Monday morning rolled round, Betty & Jughead were pretty settled in. One of the couple’s presents from Polly was two silver chains for their rings so if they weren’t wearing them on their fingers, it would be close to their hearts.

They arrived at school ten minutes earlier which was part of their plan to avoid telling their friends especially Archie and Veronica who would throw a hissy fit if they were to find out. It wasn’t as if they were ashamed, on the contrary, the newly weds were elated they just didn’t want any judgement. Fred of course knew about the marriage and the apartment, he had helped arrange the place through a contractor he’d previously done work for. As far as Archie knew, Jughead had moved back in with FP and Betty was away visiting Polly. The parents knew and respected the teens for wanting to keep things private.

15 minutes before first bell, Veronica came barging into the Blue and Gold office with Kevin behind her, where Betty and Jughead were on the couch, her legs on his lap as she was sleeping and he catching up on some reading. “Good morning love birds and isn’t it a glorious morning?” she asked in her chirpy voice. She placed a second coffee cup on Betty’s desk “you both take your coffee the same right?” By this time, Betty had also woken up and was sitting next to Jughead who was nodding in response to Veronica’s question. “So how was your weekend? Archie mentioned something above moving”

“yeah I moved out of the garage” Jughead replied keeping it as vague as possible, he didn’t technically lie.

“What about you both? Anything fun happen?” Betty asked in order to draw attention away from the two of them which was a success as the raven haired female launched into a detailed account of her weekend until the bell went off and they all left for the first class of the day.

They managed to carry on with their routine for five months before Archie noticed Betty was never home. He’d casually mentioned it to Veronica one day saying that he hadn’t seen the blond at home in a while but Veronica being Veronica decided it was her job to investigate further.

One lunch time as the four of them were sitting at the outside picnic table, Veronica sat down opposite Betty “I’ve just realized it’s been a while since we’ve had a girls night so how about me, you, Ben & Jerrys and all the cheesy 80′s movies we can find?”

“sounds good. Your place on Friday?” Betty asked smiling

“actually we’re having some renovations done so your place? I’ll bring the snacks, come along Archie” Veronica got up again and left before Betty could protest with the red head following.

“Juggie what do I do?” Betty looked panicked “my mom still doesn’t like Veronica that much so that’s not happening. Maybe we should just tell them” her breathing started to speed up “they’re going to find out eventually right? Why not tell them ourselves?”

Jughead took her hands in his to calm her down “Bets it’s going to be okay. Follow my breathing.” Jughead took slow deep breaths as Betty tried to follow eventually coming down to the same pace as her husbands. “Instead of a girls night in on Friday, in two weeks it’ll be our six month anniversary so how about we invite our friends over and tell them then.”

Betty nodded along “two weeks. I better go tell Veronica, see you at home husband” she got up and kissed Jughead and whispered “after cheerleading practice” and walked away leaving him flustered.

Two weeks. The whole meal was planned, Betty was going to cook a big meal including strawberry cobbler which had quickly become Jughead’s favorite dessert, but does anything ever go to plan in Riverdale?

No, no it doesn’t.

On the Thursday night (the night before the dinner was planned) Jughead got a call from Veronica explaining that Betty had been injured at cheerleading practice and had been rushed to Riverdale Memorial. He felt like his world was spinning out of control, he couldn’t focus on anything apart from getting there as fast as possible. Arriving at the hospital he asked the nurse for instructions as to where to find his wife, he ran to the waiting room where the rest of the River Vixens, Alice, Hal, Archie, Kevin & Polly sat. He walked up to Alice who greeted her son-in-law with a quick hug.

“how is she? Have they said anything?” he asked frantically

“Not yet son” Hal responded shaking Jughead’s hand. The younger boy nodded and sat next to Polly who was holding her restless daughter Ellie in her arms. Jughead had always loved kids especially Ellie, his goddaughter who held out her chubby arms towards him and moved into his arms. She settled immediately resting her head on his shoulder. FP had arrived not long after with JB as Gladys was still at work and they sat down behind the Coopers.

Almost an hour later, a doctor came out and headed for the large group waiting. “Family of Elizabeth Cooper-Jones?” Jughead as well as the Coopers & Jones had stood up as the rest of their school friends looked on with mixed reactions, some were shocked, others just plain confused. “Which one is Forsythe Cooper-Jones?”

Jughead walked to the front, handing Ellie back to Polly as he moved “that’s me. How’s Betty?”

“Mr Cooper-Jones, your wife sustained a minor head injury. We carried out a series of tests to make sure it was nothing serious as most head injuries can go undiagnosed for a long period of time. Fortunately she’s a tough as nails. We’d like to keep her in overnight to be on the safe side other than that, you can go visit her.” The rest of the waiting room stood up at this “Only family at the moment I’m afraid” he addressed the rest of the room before looking back to Jughead and family “she’s in room 413, last room on the left” and he walked away.

The Coopers & Jones’ families made their way to the corridor when they notice Jughead wasn’t following them. They looked at him and nodded understanding he’d have to tell his classmates the full story.

He turned to the room and went into explaining the full story from their first meeting to their first date, the first time they kissed to the first time they exchanged i love yous which happened to be the night he proposed. By the end, most of the room was in (happy) tears.

He disappeared down the corridor into Betty’s room to see her wide awake and playing with Ellie. The rest of the family decided to call it a night as it was fast approaching midnight and all bid the couple farewell. Jughead kissed her on her forehead before kissing her gently on the lips.

“What a great first anniversary huh?” she joked, a smile gracing her lips

“I’m with you so it’s an amazing day anyway” he replied smiling “by the way, the rest of the squad plus Archie & Kevin knows about us now so the rest of the town should do by tomorrow.”

Betty shifted over in her bed patting next to her for Jughead to lay down, he wrapped his arm around her holding her close. “I love you Elizabeth Cooper-Jones”

“Love you more Forsythe Cooper-Jones”

FIN

#bughead fanfiction #riverdale #bughead prompts #bughead #betty x jughead #betty cooper #jughead jones

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lynestvstoriesblr · 8 years ago

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GERIJAH: A TRAGIC LOVE STORY?

Now as a Valentine gift for all of you, a brief look into Gerijah! Happy Valentine’s Day and a special shoutout to @selene-yoshi-chan, @cartoonobsessionsyndrome, @welcome-to-cobblepothell, @multi-villain-imagines and @jokesterwrites

Despite the fact that they share no airtime, she never mentions him and he’s only in 2 episodes, I believe that I can prove that Gertrud Kapelput and Elijah Van Dahl is one of the deepest, loving and complex couples in the history of FOX’s Gotham, using only examples from the show and well-formed thoughts.

For me, Gerijah first became a thing in the middle of Elijah’s first episode. There is a scene where Elijah is serving Oswald a meal and telling his son about his past with Gertrud where is his body language, the way he stared off into the distance as he called Gertrud ‘so beautiful’, and he broke down at the thought of his parents separated them that it first dawned on me. This wasn’t just a guy recalling good times, this was a man telling a story about a woman he was still very much in love with. This seems even truer when Elijah tells how he meets his wife, Grace, in a much more matter-of-fact, less emotional way than his Gertrud story. In fact, proof that Elijah loves Gertrud comes with his very first entrance. He appeared as edger and nervous as a schoolboy going on a date, when he comes to put flowers on her grave. Old flowers are already there, suggesting that he has already been there before, (or the flowers could be put there by Ed, as per Oswald’s request) and it’s unusual for a rich man to place flowers on a servant’s grave or for a married man to do so for a ex-girlfriend, unless, of course, the dead still meant something very special. With the line, ‘Gertrud was a cook that worked for my parents,’ not ‘for us’ or ‘for the family’, it is possible that Elijah never saw Gertrud as a servant but more as a equal, a friend, a lover, a girlfriend or even a wife. Granted, we never got a timeframe for Gertrud and Elijah’s relationship but there’s one more clue that points it to being extremely serious. When Elijah meets Oswald for the first time, all he needs to know is 2 things, only 2 pieces of information, that his mother is Gertrud and that he’s 32, that’s it. Elijah never even questions that Oswald is not his son, again. This certainty and the intensity of his feelings for Gertrud prove that it wasn’t a one-night stand or a casual fling. These were 2 people in love and were sexually faithful to one other. But if Elijah loved Gertrud so much, why didn’t he go after her? I’m not so sure he didn’t. Yes, Elijah tearfully admitted he was ashamed that he didn’t at least try to contact Gertrud when his parents forced Gertrud to flee the mansion but earlier in that same show, Elijah said that he ‘only found her in death, I afriad’, that quote implies that he HAD tried to find her in life but was unsuccessful. Regardless, by his own admission, life without Gertrud is pretty bleak for Elijah. His father commits suicide in his office, leaving deep mental scars on Elijah, leading to behavior such as sleepwalking and sometime later, his mother also dies. Elijah said that after his mother’s death he barely got out of bed for months at a time. This is classic behavior for someone who has depression and after losing both his parents along with Gertrud, why shouldn’t poor Elijah be depressed? In such a state, a lonely, depressed, heartbroken, single millionaire would be quite easy prey for a gold digger, enter Grace. We know next to nothing about Grace and her children’s lives before they met Elijah. It is mentioned that Grace’s first husband was abusive. (Given that Grace is a skilled liar and the fact the woman never acts like a victim, the abusive husband could be a tall tale meant to gain sympathy from a compassionate Elijah. But as this is a one-time comment it’s impossible to prove one way or the other.) Something we do for a fact is that Grace is not born one of Gotham’s upper crust. When she met Elijah, Grace was a waitress. She had the same kind of blue-collar life that Gertrud had. Despite the fact that Elijah said that ‘love blossomed’ between him and Grace after he took her and her kids into his home, there is no proof that Grace ever liked, loved or even respected her husband. Make no mistake, my friends, there is no great love story between Elijah and Grace. Still, there had to be something between the two at some point right? After all, they got all the way to the altar, so they had to have some kind of deep connection? Well, yes and no. As someone who has given this a lot of (okay, maybe too much) thought, I came up with 3 possible reasons as for why Elijah would marry Grace. As I’ve already mentioned, Grace was a waitress when she and Elijah first met. A waitress is similar to Gertrud’s profession as a cook, leading me to believe that Elijah’s feelings for Grace could had been a transference of the love he still had for Gertrud, playing up the parallels between the 2 women and ignoring the many differences. Another school of thoughts is shortly after being taken into the mansion to get away from her abusive ex, Grace sets out to seduce Elijah, (i.e. sex). Elijah doesn’t seem like the love ‘em and leave ‘em type, so after sleeping together, Elijah develops a crush on Grace, which he mistakes for real love. Or perhaps the attraction is not Grace or rather not Grace alone. It could be her children. Elijah did say that after the kids moved in, ‘this halls heard laughter once again.’ The prospect of becoming a family unit with Grace, Sasha and Charles would be alluring to a lonely bachelor like Elijah. The fact that Sasha and Charles carry the Van Dahl surnames rather than real father’s supports this theory. If Elijah’s motives for marrying Grace are unclear, Grace’s are crystal: his money. Whatever got them to the wedding, at some point; the marriage breaks down (if it ever worked at all). Maybe Elijah finally realizes it takes more than sex to make a marriage or it finally dawns on him that Grace isn’t Gertrud or perhaps when the kids got older, Elijah finds there’s not much between him and Grace as a couple. Elijah goes back to his memories of Gertrud. By the time Oswald appears, the marriage is dead. The terms of affection like ‘dear’ now seems like forced polite conversation and they sleep in different rooms.

So I think I proved that Elijah loves Gertrud but did Gertrud love Elijah? I believe she did, but if Elijah’s love is proved in words, Gertrud’s are proved by actions. Elijah tells Oswald that all he was told that his parents and Gertrud ‘came to an arrangement.’ This almost always means that Gertrud was offered a large amount of money to stay away from Elijah. But given her faded clothes and tiny apartment that we saw in season 1 plus Oswald saying that ‘they didn’t have much’ when he was growing up, it’s pretty safe to say that she didn’t take the money, proving that she wasn’t the gold digger the Van Dahls thought she was and that she truly loved Elijah. While she didn’t take the money, she did agree to go away. Why? First off, she was probably worried about Elijah himself

We are never told when Elijah got his bad heart but if he was sickly in his youth as he is later on plus his lack of experience with the city, he was home-schooled after all, Gertrud was likely worried if Elijah left the mansion, his health would get worse. By this time, Gertrud was pregnant. The fact that Oswald was the same age as when Gertrud left the mansion leads me to believe that she was a few months along. Elijah’s health could also be the reason Gertrud never told him about the pregnancy. He has already threatened to run away with her even without a baby in the picture, if he knew about the baby, there would be no way he would leave Gertrud’s side. A lesser woman would have viewed a pregnancy as an answer to prayer. She could of used the baby to trap Elijah into marriage. Gotham producers have always described Gerturd ‘as a proud but faded beauty’. It’s the proud part that interests me. No proud woman in love would want a shotgun wedding with disapproving in-laws. I believe that Gertrud didn’t tell her employers for a different reason, she doesn’t trust them. After all, this is the couple that tried to buy her off, believe she is good enough for their son, so why would she be good enough for their grandchild? So Gertrud left the mansion and Elijah with her secret intact. So Gertrud is unmarried, pregnant, jobless, and if her job was live-in, homeless. Gertrud probably moved in to a poor neighborhood into the city and works at a new job. Gertrud was just as heartbroken as Elijah but unlike Elijah who has nothing to do but mope around the mansion and wonder what went wrong, Gertrud is busy trying to build a new life for herself and for her unborn child. As we all know, Gertrud carried her baby to term and untimely gave birth to a son, who looked a lot like his father. Oswald becomes his mother’s entire world. By all accounts, Gertrud is an outstanding mother. Yes, she does lie and tell Oswald his father was dead but I don’t think she did it out of spite or bitterness but out of a need to protect a little boy against the idea that his own family might not think him good enough. As an awkward and bullied boy, the only place that Oswald feels completely safe, secured and loved was with his mother. The bond between mother and son is so strong that after Gertrud’s death, Oswald often finds himself lost without her. If lovingly tending to their son is not enough to convince you that Gertrud loved Elijah, how about the fact that is likely that Gertrud NEVER married. This is not canon, no one on the show said Gertrud never married, but all the pieces are there. Yes, she was the widow of Oswald’s dead father, which makes Oswald (and her) look better. Since he is not the type to do something without his parent’s permission, it’s unlikely that people address her as Mrs. Kapelput or Cobblepot, but this could be that she told people Gertrud and Elijah were ever legally married and Oswald recalls his youth often but has never once mentioned a stepfather. The bond between mother and son wouldn’t be as strong if there had been a husband/ boyfriend in the picture vying for Gertrud’s time and attention. It’s not hard at all to see Gertrud as a working, single mother who had no time or will to date. Also, Kapelput was the only name on her tombstone leading me to believe that Gertrud simply put Mrs. in front of her own maiden name. If Gertrud never truly got over Elijah, then it must of hurt a lot when she heard that he married and seemingly move on. And since they all live in the same area, it’s likely she did know about Grace and the kids. At the start of Gotham, Gertrud comes off as an overprotective and overbearing mother and in a way, she is. The older Oswald gets, the less and less control Gertrud has over where he goes. I believe Gertrud is terrified of losing Oswald, but not to a hussy, as she claims. No, she is afraid that one day Oswald is going to bump into his father or stepfamily, exposing the lies that she had told him his whole life, causing her son to reject her. When Oswald and Elijah do meet, it’s in a graveyard and where both are grieving for the recently deceased Gertrud. By taking in and caring for Oswald, Elijah may be trying to redeem himself. By embracing their son with open arms, Elijah might be trying to prove his love for Gertrud, to show he’s worthy of a 2nd chance, if only to their child. As Oswald (and Gertrud) come to the forefront of Elijah’s mind, Grace and the kids are pushed to the side, a little. It’s ironic that Grace’s cruelest deed turns out to be kindness. For only by dying, can Elijah be reunited with Gertrud.

What makes Elijah and Gertrud a tragic couple is that their parting was completely avoidable! Both are equally to blame. If Elijah had simply stood up to his parents, he could have raised his son. If Gertrud trusted Elijah with the news of her pregnancy, she could have her baby and the man she loved. Still, even in death, Gerijah has a small justice. If the Van Dahl dynasty continued, it will have to be by Elijah’s ‘only living relative’ Oswald…and Gertrud’s bloodline.

Do you agree? Disagree? Have I missed something? Comment!

#gotham #gertrud kapelput #elijah van dahl #oswald cobblepot #Valentine day

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