#shoutout to jaskierswolf for writing a truly impressive number of these and providing us all with wonderful things to read!

[wren-of-the-woods]

Fake Dating Fic Recs

Geraskier

The Grass is Greener by @jaskierswolf Rated G, 6k

Jaskier's mother is coming to stay and his garden is an absolute mess and his lawn mower has seen better days... luckily for him his ridiculously hot neighbour is there to lend a hand.

A Favor for a Friend by biancarambles Rated T, 5k

As if being hopelessly in love and sharing a room with his best friend Jaskier isn’t hard enough for poor Geralt, he just can’t say no when Jaskier asks him to accompany him to his grandfather’s funeral. What better way to get back at Jaskier’s estranged, homophobic family than attending the funeral with a handsome (fake) boyfriend in tow? Any heartbreak on Geralt’s part is just collateral damage.

Christmas Downhill by avengeful-bunny (brodeurbunny30) Rated T, 66k

Jaskier, a struggling musician on the outs with his wealthy, elitist family is invited to spend a very special Christmas at his childhood home...with his boyfriend that technically doesn't exist. Enter Geralt, a Law student and part-time ski instructor who happens to fit all the requirements to play fake boyfriend in front of the family, for a small fee. With the magic of the season in the air, will the plan go flawlessly, or will a case of the feelings cause it all to go downhill? Either way, it promises to be a Christmas to remember.

The Bet by ladyprydian Rated T, 12k

“It was your idea Geralt!” Jaskier says. “ ‘Why don’t you cheat Jaskier’ you said-” “I did not say that!” Geralt growls. “ - so if I’m going to cheat you’re going to cheat with me!” “No Jaskier, absolutely not!” “Please Geralt. It’s just for December. Be my boyfriend for a month.”

I Scream a Truth, You Hear a Lie by @flowercrown-bard Rated T, 21k

When some bigoted man insists that Geralt can’t feel love, Jaskier blurts out that they are married - which they very much aren’t. So naturally, Geralt and Jaskier have to pretend to be husbands to convince people that Geralt is lovable, though no one doubts that more than Geralt himself.

Fast Track to Happily Ever After by trekkiepirate Rated T, 3k

Geralt opened his eyes to see Jaskier frantically tossing their belongings into packs. “That’s my shirt, not yours.” Jaskier looked down at the black linen in his hand and then tossed it into Geralt’s pack. “Right, yes, I knew that. Glad you’re awake; we need to go.”

Kiss me, for real this time by @jaskierswolf Rated T, 2k

“So… you’ll come to the banquet to protect me, but not as my bodyguard?” Jaskier sang. Geralt furrowed his brow and hummed. Jaskier rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Well you still refuse to use the term friend so that won’t work. You’ll have to be my plus one!” He laughed at his own joke, ignoring the spike in his heartbeat. Just a joke, Jask. Geralt hummed and tilted his head. “Alright.”

Snowstorm by @lovelyrita1967 Rated T, 9k

Geralt and Jaskier work in a restaurant together, but a snowstorm changes everything.

winnings and weddings by @purpurred Rated M, 16k

Jaskier and Geralt have to pretend to be engaged. Surprisingly, it's Geralt's idea. Everything is simultaneously the most hare-brained scheme and the most thorough production in the world.

Wild Blue Yonder by @jaskierswolf Rated T, 5k

Geralt's bookshop is slowly falling apart and he's ready to give up when Jaskier wanders into the store

overcome by @penandinkprincess Rated T, 38k

Drawn by a competition but afraid of a dark figure from his past, Jaskier manages to convince Geralt to attend with him. Now if the witcher would just stop asking why.

A Valentine's to Remember by @jaskierswolf Rated T, 3k

For Valentine's Day Jaskier has arrived to walk alpacas with his very best friend in the whole wide world... the catch? They have to pretend to be dating to get the Valentine's Day discount.

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Other Pairings

champagne problems by @yoursummerfrost Yennefer/Jaskier, Geralt/Yennefer/Jaskier, Rated T, 11k

When Jaskier finds out that his ex-boyfriend is getting married, he convinces Yennefer to help him stage a fake proposal so he can ruin the wedding. There's just one problem: it turns out they both know the caterer.

Don't Stop Believin' by @skaldingrayne Lambert/Jaskier, Rated T, 5k

"I wish I could find a guy like you to actually date," Jaskier mumbled, so softly Lambert almost hadn't heard him over the music. Lambert snorted, a sharp and unwelcome pain shooting through his chest at the joke. Not that it was a very funny one. "Literally standing right here, Jas." "Yeah, but...not straight, I mean," came Jaskier's mystifying reply. Wait…Straight? Him? Lambert craned his head back just far enough to look Jaskier in those unfairly blue eyes. "You…You know I'm bi, right?"

A Marriage of Inconvenience by @ghostinthelibrarywrites Yennefer/Jaskier, Rated M, 7k

When Jaskier asks Yennefer to pretend to marry him in order to go undercover in a Nilfgaardian operative’s court, she decides she can’t let Geralt’s ridiculous bard get himself killed. But in the weeks that follow, the two grow closer and Yennefer begins to develop some inconvenient feelings for her pretend husband.