#shoutout catholicism for this one thing
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as someone who grew up christian, i seriously got curious about how pagans/people who have a pantheon of gods would “pick” the ones they would focus their worship on when they have lots of deities to choose from
then, as someone who grew up specifically catholic, i thought about the saints and understood
#shoutout catholicism for this one thing#catholiscism#paganism#hellenic pagan#all my homies love pagans#i said pick in quotes bc it felt right so if it’s rude i’m sorry
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I made a post on twitter a month ago about Byleth and how I didn't understand why so many people take the western centric take of losing their divinity as a good thing when Byleth's journey is a very Buddhist character journey. An Edelstan found it just yesterday, wrote this long ass essay about why I was wrong, with no sources but level 4 headcanons ie you literally made that tf up. I linked them to a really cool blog post that backs up all their sources about why it's Buddhist, all the motifs the game has with it shoutout to FantasyInvader's blog for alerting me to it and of course they come back with how I nor the blog poster don't understand Buddhism and also the game itself. Why? Because the blog and the Buddhist reading say CF continues the cycle of suffering when according to the Edelstan it has the "True Peace" motif. Oh and they cussed me out.
Anyway I blocked them after that but the point is, I'd be willing to give these people a chance and hear them out if they didn't act like babies and throw a tantrum when someone throws facts, logic and sources both from the game and analysis that backs up points with other material at them. Game is the true peacfe route? Oh look the banner is the only one with a black border why is that? Oh and this is the only route that ends with fire and darkness in the bg when every other one ends with light? Hmmmm.
I'm tempted to just drop a bunch of literature critical thinking questions anytime I interact with these people because boy do they not know how to do it because anytime they run into something backed up they yell until the person gives up and goes away. What a sad existence no wonder they all live in that server.
It's excessively strange how divorced from the home country people want 3H to be, that despite the game (like many FE games tbh) taking cues and morals from Japanese society, they'll just ignore it because "oh church = catholicism and christianity is bad" which is reductive.
I'd recommend just keep on doing what you're doing by blocking the people who come in with heat with no actual firepower to back it up.
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since you mention having a rosary, is it common for lutherans or other branches of protestants to use them? i've always found them fascinating, but i grew up baptist and wasn't really around anyone who used or had them. what are your thoughts on people having them just because they find comfort in them?
Hi beloved, good question!
In my experience, they're not very common among Protestants, which seems to be because the rosary is so associated with veneration of Mary, which most Protestants are wary of (to say the least). The tradition is so associated with Catholicism that lots of Protestants don't even consider that it could be for them too.
I've had to create my own way of connecting with rosary practices, because the dominant Catholic tradition is often not relevant to me. I'm more comfortable incorporating Mary than most Lutherans, but I don't generally pray through any saints--it just has never been how I've prayed, and while I love saying prayers saints have written and learning about them, asking them to pray for me isn't really how I interpret "the communion of saints." For me, they're praying with me, and my petitions are to God, as Jesus taught. (I'm not dismissing or demonizing anyone's saint work! This is just personally my practice.)
The Hail Mary is such a gorgeous prayer, for instance, and most of it is straight from the gospel--and I definitely find it more valuable because it doesn't involve any personalization/specific petitions, just a general yearning for her to pray for us. I don't really experience her as listening to me, but as praying for all people with her Son, and my recognizing that connects me with her and all saints who have prayed through time.
Anyway, practices like this are really common and people find all different ways of connecting with them! Catholic rosaries, Orthodox prayer ropes, Muslim misbahahs, Jewish tzitzit--they all tap into a physical prayer practice, a tangible repetition/reminder of spirituality that I think is beautiful.
Holding something people regard as holy can be inherently comforting, however you connect with it! Just holding a rosary, wrapping it around my fingers, religious art I can put in my backpack--it's powerful. Hanging it up, carrying it with you--this is a tangible prayer practice as much as any repeated prayer sequence.
If you are interested in prayers to go with it, but don't connect with the Catholic tradition, there are all kinds of things you can do! You can look at the existing traditions and see what you connect with and what you don't--I love some Mysteries, and some aren't in my practice/belief system, like the Assumption. You can look up "[denomination] rosary" to see if anyone's done it before you--several people have written Lutheran rosaries, and a Swedish bishop created the pearls of life tradition, to tap into this desire for Protestants! And then of course, you can create your own practice, picking prayers/verses/meditation subjects that are most part of your spirituality, and going through them.
Best wishes on your journey! Fascination in a practice is often (for me, at least) a sign that I should try it out, seeing how it transforms my practice and me. You can always leave it behind if it doesn't work for you.
<3 Johanna
P.S. Artist shoutout! Work of Human Hands on Etsy makes personalized pride flag rosaries, if anyone's interested! I'm planning to get one when it's in my budget :)
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Hey Bee
After reading ch 18 and some carefully considered, I have theroy as to why there is a Pythia in the first place. According to Techno all the other kingdoms worship Clara, but they don't have their own Pythia, prophet, or anything else like it. So does this mean that the Pythia is just another tool to keep the other countries in check? Or as a way to show superiority over the others?
Also, THANK YOU TECHNOBLADE!! for telling the Pythia what he needed to hear. While I'm sure everyone else in the temple knew it, Techno has no qualms about voicing that the only person that the Pythia was trying to convince that he wasnt a person, that he was simply a vessel, that he had no other purpose in life but to serve Clara, was himself. About time some one told him that.
As for the vision, that definitely through us all for a loop. I do find it kinda funny that in his first vision in temple, the Pythia sees Tommy getting hurt and is like if "that's what you want Clara". And now here he is again with a similar vision, only this time he's definitely more paniced for Tommy's well being.
Speaking of visions, another thing that stuck out is that when Quackity jokes about giving him a warning if Clara speaks to the Pythia concerning a war. And the Pythia doesn't say anything like "my visions are between my goddess and I" like he used too. In fact, he ends up telling Q that he hasn't had a vision in months!
I'd call that ✨️progress✨️
Amazing chapter!
-AlterEgo
I explained this in another ask, but essentially I view the pythia as kind of like the pope if i had to make an irl world equivalent. throughout most of history, the pope resided in rome which was considered the 'capital' of catholicism. so even though a lot of places in the world had high catholic populations, there was one religious leader centered in a single city. that's kind of the basis for why there's only one pythia. except of course this gets complicated when you take the visions into consideration, but that's meant to be confusing and not make total sense atm so :)
shoutout to technoblade for just saying it like it is
technically saying he hasn't had a vision in months isn't breaking any rules, it would just be a rule break if he had a vision and proceeded to tell anyone besides the emperor about it before it happened. but yeah, a few months ago he still would've clammed up about it and refused to say a word. now he talks openly to quackity about not having any visions. he's making progress even if he doesn't realize it :)
tysm i'm so glad you enjoyed!!
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There's this odd trend in anime, have you noticed it yet?
It’s actually been there for a while, hell maybe since some of its early and most beloved days. It's mystic shrines tended to by beautiful maidans, wise elders beseeching the forces beyond on behalf of their people, and those so special moments shared by all who live around them… That’s right baby it’s the Spanish inquisition!!!!
Well technically it's the larger organization from which the surprising Spaniards derived from. Of course I mean the catholic church. That’s right from Trigon to Black lagoon to whatever the hell Black clover thinks nuns are, the Japanese anime industry is in love with the Bishop of Rome’s fan club. And while many enjoy these shoutouts or are just as equally confused by them, few have sought to shed light on this subject. But those who do I got some protestant v catholic beef with yell.
Many posit that the Japanese place so many Catholic imagery, ideas, and design motifs into their shows simply because it’s this interesting foreign thing that just looks neat. Pic related.
Well I say nay nay to that. Before we dive into the REAL reason for why Japan actually loves them Roman Residents, that the feds don’t want you to know. We must first at least cast off this lesser understanding.
Ok now that clickbait dramatics are out of the way this idea of Japanese fascination with Catholics and Christianity as a whole being purely based of aesthetics and just vague interest is not inherently wrong. But I do find it to be incomplete. I mean come on if they want some weird ass religion to put in their show they got India and Hinduism right across the way. Now this is no slight at my beloved Hindis out there but ya'll got to admit your religion would make the most balls to the walls kickass anime since Gurren Lagan destroyed my eyeballs and left for dead in Cincinnati.
(Cough Cough) Furthermore, I just find that there are other options for Japan that they seem to completely ignore. I mean why not Judaism or Islam, hell why not even other forms of Christianity like Greek Orthodoxy or even Mormonism. NO!
There is something special about Catholicism that these cool cats in Tokyo can’t get enough of and I’m about to blow your mind with it...
It’s not what’s different but what they have in common.
No I’m serious! There are numerous and very shocking similarities that make Catholicism the perfect mix of mysterious and familiar for the Japanese/Shinto palate.
First and foremost of these is chivalry. When one looks into the history of Bushido one will always find the Buddha specifically the Zen Buddhism mixed in with their own Shinto background. From this fertile soil of respect for nature and stoicism would sprout into the powerful flower of the bushido code. And oh, would you look at that that’s right! After the European horseman of old got sipping that sweet Catholic eucharist wine, what did they end up doing? Giving themselves a rule book called chivalry to keep them in line with that heavenly way. So obviously when a Japanese man would trace the lines, he’d be like "oh, so this is like what Zen and Shinto was like to the samurai? That’s pretty neat let’s throw it in my new anime."
Another odd one is gonna get a little more esoteric so work with me here. I believe that both the Catholic Church and Shintoism both have this acknowledgement of a similar phenomenon. The inherent mystic power of the feminine touch.
See shrine maidans and nuns. Both are almost synonymous when one thinks of their respective church or shrine. Like ask a western man what he thinks when you say catholic church... and after all the profane shit, he’ll likely say nuns. A similar phenomena would be seen in the Japanese man... minus the profanity. I believe this similarity exists because both Catholicism and Shintoism accounted for that special touch a woman can bring to a place. That grace and delicate nature, that way of mysterious connection to the more stranger aspects of the world. It’s like this meme.
Now next is another weird one that came to mind. They both have this ritualistic respect of water. For the Catholic this is baptism and the use of holy water to bless one’s self and other objects, a similar concept exists in Japan where one washes their hands before entering a Shrine and then there is the use of ritualistic waterfall bathing, Misogi.
now this is like baptism on steroids so here’s another handshake meme.
Alright now we can really get into the anime shit. Demons!!! Not only do they both share a common insane lore of specific demons and all the fucked-up shenanigans that ensue, but they also have equal amounts of exorcisms and exorcists to kick infernal ass. Seriously, I think this is like the main reason why we see so many Catholics in anime fighting demons. It's as old as the Nazarene Himself. So when a Japanese man hears something about Jesus casting out a thousand demon host named Legion you better believed he’s gonna go home and write some kick ass manga featuring some big ass demon named Legion. Said Japanese man pictured here
It's gonna be Jump's next big three slot just you wait.
And finally, to top this all off Imma end it wholesome 100. So there is this huge aspect in Japanese culture where a large majority will go to shrines get themselves and their children blessed and attend and partake in all the festivals, but not really call themselves Shinto. Is this not the same as all of those who go to Easter and Christmas mass even though they couldn't tell you a cross from a crucifix?
This is the final similarity. That something beyond the theology which binds the community together. And even though these so called 'different' worlds are oceans apart they share this community bond, that little slice of unity in this crazy world and makes it all worth it. And that kid is what we call in the philosophy Bizz an universal concept… and a way to make some kick ass anime.
Anyway that's about it smell you later hoped you learned something.
#anime#anime and manga#manga#blue excorsist#trigun#black lagoon#d gray man#d grey man#exorcists#catholic#shinto#japan#japanese culture#philosophy#theology#christianity#blog post#essay writing#edutainment#education#entertainment#fire force#black clover#nuns#shrine maiden
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father bests hcs (more like just going ham with self-projections and fucked up ideas) (also warning i mention family abuse in this)
+ his father was also a priest and basically brainwashed him into thinking that this was the only way of life that is worth living; despite level being somewhat aware of this he feels obligated to follow through with it as his father emotionally manipulated him with rewards for good behavior and constantly reminded him/showed him how 'good' catholicism is to the point where he can't function in life without being reminded of it every 5 fucking seconds + his father also pressured him to constantly present as male, as his father's own fucked up morals consist of thinking that all women are automatically sinful by default because of eve and the only way to correct it is through masculine qualities/1950s housewife shit, abstinence or catholicism (or all of the above in the case of Level) (please understand what im saying im too tired to explain) +because of this, and because of the nature of his job (no one sees him shirtless/pantless) everyone just assumes he is amab and of course he isn't going to say shit about it and since its an all girls school, feminine products are abundant and easy to get away with using without notice +the only person who knows he's trans other than himself is manberg, who has been a faculty member of the school before bests was even born and figured it out immediately what his father was doing; however, manberg doesn't give a shit about it as he just didn't want to lose his job by arguing with him +he also has never actually dated or been with anyone in his life, as his father beat into his skull that any kind of romantic or physical relationships is a one-way ticket to hell and is merely a distraction when spreading the word of god, and the mere thought of it gives him anxiety/insecurity and is also incredibly touch starved due to this (also shoutout to @sharkaiju you know why) +he was constantly haunted/stressed out about those who died at the fire for the first couple of years but eventually his only (very poor) coping mechanism was to A) knit the little angel golf club protectors in honor of them (he made them pretty soon after the fire and also knows how to knit due to previous said 1950s housewife shit), B) constantly stuff it away in his mind and 3) pump up his ego/self-entitlement about the whole situation ('I did it for the greater good! i should be commended!' mentality) +his self-worth level is incredibly low for reasons stated above +he also constantly wears a chain cilice as self-punishment for the fire +as soon as he is revived and finds out actual real demons revived him his last shred of any sort of good morals goes right out the fucking window as he no longer fears dying/going to hell/being condemned for his sins which was literally the only thing keeping him from being a complete piece of shit and finally accepts that god has abandoned him because of his sins, with his only striving goal left in life to be paraded as a hero for 'saving' children to the public - no longer really giving a shit if he actually did help any of them +he himself actually attended the school as a child and his father was the principal before him +with him often being picked on for being the only boy at an all-girls school (with it being a lot less socially acceptable at the time)/being made fun of for being a teachers principal's pet +so when raúl comes out he is a bit taken aback at how everyone else is so kind about it but nonetheless is accepting of raúl because of bests' own ordeal (and maybe just an inkling of jealousy as well) +he repeats/mumbles his favorite bible scriptures to himself whenever stressed out +his favorite show is the flying nun and whenever its movie day for the kids 9 times out of 10 he's putting on his old VHS tapes of it (which one of the characters on the show was raúl's trans awakening) the other 1 times is joshua and the promised land whatever yesteryear pg rated movie the kids vote for +he also feels awful about the school's poor condition because he thinks that his father would think that he's a failure for allowing it to fall into such disrepair
#im sorry while i was in the middle of writing this the neighbour started their car and played loud ass music for 4 seconds it was so funny#its 3 am#and it was dead quiet beforehand#also im not tagging this my besties will see this if need be#sorry if this is extreme somehow but trust me this is the tamest of headcanons for him when it comes to me#also id like to clarify none of his peers knew about it either
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3, 12, 17, 28
03. What sort of daydreams / stray thoughts they have about their love interest
It goes without saying that Roland is on Rhys’ mind at least 75% of the time, so every stray thought he has tends to pertain to him in one way or another whether he likes it or not. Prior to Roland’s ghosting act, Rhys would spend far too much time contemplating a cosy future with him; settling down together outside of the castle/getting a place to call their own and enjoying a little domesticity. Even though he’d never admit it aloud, Rhys is something of a hopeless romantic at heart and tends to go all in if he falls for someone, so the thought of marriage has been a stray thought on occasion but due to the aforementioned ghosting disrupting the flow of things and Rhys being… well, Rhys, it’s something he knows he needs to put a little more thought into. Post-ghosting, Rhys has been yearning relentlessly for things to go back to how they were, reminiscing over Roland’s tactile ways and missing them terribly. There’s nowhere he feels happier/more soothed than in the safety and security of Roland’s arms, so he’s been spending far too much time daydreaming about having that constant back, especially given how chaotic everything’s been for him as of late. He’d also rather be waterboarded than admit it in any great detail, but before he properly got to know Ro, Rhys entertained many a fantasy about him. (Someone had a crush from afar for some time.) (Shoutout to Finn’s trial for being the catalyst behind R&R finally initiating conversation. <3) He’s only admitted a small fraction of them to Roland because his pride (and Catholic guilt) tend to get in the way the vast majority of the time.
12. Ways my Muse goes out of their way for their love interest.
However he can, really. Rhys will usually lean into the emotional side of things and offer as much reassurance and compassion as he can (unless he’s in a mood, then it takes significant effort). Words of affirmation come naturally to him, so it never takes much for him to spill his heart to Roland when they’re all cosied up behind closed doors. He’ll happily listen to all of Roland’s ramblings on whatever topic’s captivated his interest even if it’s about something Rhys has no real interest in or agrees with. (Amusingly, the dichotomy between their music tastes remains a point of contention. Rhys has since gone out of his way not to blast Beyoncé’s entire discography when Ro’s around given his distaste. Rhys judges him relentlessly for it to this day.) There’s very little Rhys wouldn’t do for Roland, in all honesty. He’s loyal to a detrimental degree, even now. All Roland has to do is ask and, chances are, Rhys will do it, even if he complains about whatever the request may be.
17. My Muse’s sexual fantasies regarding their partner.
Rhys has spent far too long in confession trying to atone for the wealth of fantasies he accumulated before he and Roland had even uttered a word to each other outside of meetings/a strictly professional environment. Roland’s managed to pry a couple of them from him with considerable effort and determination, but as mentioned earlier, Rhys still has a few he’s kept close to his heart for the sake of keeping his pride and ego intact. Catholicism aside (or maybe directly because of it, who’s to say), Rhys has fantasised numerous times about being fucked in church but given Roland’s feelings towards religion as a whole, he knows better than to ask. It also makes attending confession ten times more challenging than it already is for him. There’s also the fantasy of being pinned and fucked against the desk in the Council Room but only with Ro present – he’s not fond of sharing or putting himself on display for others, not unless a lengthy discussion’s occurred beforehand. The rest is between Rhys and God. (Amen.)
28. My Muse’s favorite way to spoil and/or pleasure their partner.
When it comes to Roland, Rhys knows affection and the fluffing of his ego will always work without fail, so spoiling him through attentive, lingering touches and a steady flow of compliments will be sufficient enough to spoil him. Given that the past decade was spent repressing the vast majority of his emotions so that he could focus solely upon his birthright with the family coven back in Mayfair and abiding by familial expectations, being as open with his feelings towards Roland has taken a fair amount of continuous effort and unlearning certain behavioural patterns but Rhys is simultaneously down bad bad for Ro, so it hasn’t been as arduous a process as it had the potential to be. He’s ridiculously weak for him. Still, it makes every admission of adoration that much more poignant given the depths and complexities surrounding them. Pleasure-wise, Rhys’ not-so-secret oral fixation means he’s perpetually ready to get on his knees for Roland at a moment’s notice. Drawing out the process just to watch Roland slowly fall apart always works wonders for Rhys’ ego.
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love her but this reminds me of an (honestly petty, you don’t have to take this seriously) complaint I’ve had for awhile
Rusty not knowing. What fucking aesthetic she’s going for with ANYONE
okay so for example; I was tryna get help on GAP designs with my mom once and was going to Blair (not Blaire, obligatory spelling change. Blair Veronica Hromova and Blaire Hopburn are very different characters, establishing this for the inevitable conflation by idiots) and my mother’s first question when I asked for help on her outfit was her aesthetic (or, rather, her “style” as she put it, but she meant the same thing essentially)
I paused for like 20 fucking seconds and said “uh, her inspiration is like….?????” …… “?? Aussie?? Goth beach girl?? Who also dresses like a basic pumpkin spice bitch but with an unusually alt haircut but also she wears a Juicy top once (very much not a 2016 thing, by the way 😭😭)” and then. Eventually, very confused with a wee bit of sweat on her brow, she sends me a picture of her friend over text!! Now I’m gonna do an artistic recreation as to not doxx this woman:
I mean… yeah shows that from a description multiple people can fit it. But at the same time shows that both me AND my mom were really fucking confused upon hearing a description of Blaire
also Poppy being punk is kinda funny to me like she definitely fit it more when she actually HAD Liberty Spikes but whatever flat goku ripoff bullshit she has now is making me think corporate punk more than anything. Also the weird off the shoulder top Rusty gives “HOP” characters when she can’t think of how to dress them… horrendous
also aside from Shez most of the Yonique workers I simply cannot pick up on an aesthetic (which. Sure, okay, they’re just dressed casual), nor any PREFERENCES of (KIND OF A BAD THING WHEN YOURE DESIGNING CHARACTERS TO HAVE BOTH NO AESTHETIC NOR ANY PERSONALITY TO DISCERN FROM THEIR DESIGN) from how they dress. The outfits change from boring outfit to other, not even tangentially related boring outfit so quickly that it’s just. Confusing
at first I actually interpreted Riley’s style from the cover and a few of the first stuff I saw from the comic as being. like. “Hello sir I am her partner” type respectful timid dork boyfriend woman edition. Which. MAKES SENSE she was seemingly very recently disfellowshipped from a cult where the majority of disfellowshipped members kinda sit in the back of meetings hoping to be reinstated for like at least half a year before giving it up. Like, even if she became comfortable with butch fashion at some point (good for her, everyone recovers at their own pace) there’s that sort of awkwardness you can discern from people with religious trauma (coming straight from the horse’s mouth, except my trauma is from Catholicism, not JWs), and since this is character design, it’s cool to see that come across in the way she dresses too. …then I saw her dressing basically the same as Jaden in the first chapter and got really really confused. The inconsistencies are really distracting. They’re fictional characters. Either dress them in the same thing (aside from in like. Special cases like ballroom night I guess??) or if they change outfits all the time keep their preferences CONSISTENT so I KNOW WHO THAT IS
like Riley’s sihlouette in chapter 11.5 VS in ballroom night is completely different and it pisses me off to no end as an avid character designer
want to know how to do good gender nonconforming character designs?? The like million characters from Cookie Run are RIGHT THERE
Woman
Man
Shoutout to Cookie Run one of my favorite references for character design in general
Found some Blaire bits too!
Wuv my wifey so baaaaad aaaghh 💜
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People talk about how alluring the internet is, how everyone is always on their phones, how technology is supposed to suck you in, how people scroll and keep scrolling and end up lonely by the end, how social media these days is ruining ‘real human connection and intimacy.’
And I’m not saying that’s not true. I mean, shoot, I scrolled some before deciding whether or not to type and post this.
And I’m not denying the hold that every social media company has, and that almost all of them profit off of it (shoutout to @staff for not doing that and giving the people what we want! (Which is ads about shaving your balls and also somehow Catholicism.))
But… there’s a lot of good online too. Almost all of my closest friends are online (and even the in person ones, I don’t see often because we’re all busy).
Without the internet, I wouldn’t have learned that there were queer identities beyond gay and lesbian (or what crushing on people when you’re not straight even looked like), I wouldn’t have known nonbinary people even existed, I wouldn’t have learned about consent and healthy relationships and safe sex and mixed messages and that people should want you to have boundaries, I wouldn’t have kept in anywhere near as much contact with my friends because I’m not a phone call person… (but you know what I am? A random-thoughts and selfie person).
I probably would have written all this stuff down in my journal, and thought I was going crazy all the time, and simply left the house less and less.
Talking out loud is really hard for me, in a number of ways, and most people (apparently) don’t want to make friends with someone who says “hey, do you want to read my writing?” and gives you a piece of paper.
Without the internet, and RookieMag, and Autostraddle, and queer webcomics, and AVEN, but especially tumblr: I would have thought I was the only person like me.
People love to talk about how the internet is a lonely place, about endless scrolling and Instagram-fakeness and how online friends ‘aren’t real’, but it’s fucking hard to connect in the real world. Do you know how many times I’ve tried to explain something out loud and gotten a weird look? Do you know how much easier typing and writing and drawing and connecting to other people that way comes to me, than looking someone in the eyes and verbalizing it right and trying to make it sound effortless the first time?
I’m not denying that the internet is powerful and overarching and all that. But I’ve learned so much more about my friends— and been able to tell them so much more about me— by DMing each other, and sending posts, and memes, and articles, and “hey this reminded me of you” things, than I would have if we were only in person.
And— through all this depth of knowing big things, and also being able to know each other in all these small ways that you wouldn’t necessarily think to ask about— when I am with a friend in person, and we’re vibing and having good conversations, I’m not on my phone at all. Because I care about them, and because there’s already the connection there that makes in-person socializing with my few, trusted people so worth it.
#personal#my writing#social media#tumblr things#you know who you are#bug’s kin#lyssa#ernie#whypavi#clever&#this got long but#i have opinions#autism#okay to reblog#okay to comment#actually autistic
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MG has read...a lot of TOG fanfic this autumn: a rec list
Hey y’all, @morallygreywaren asked if I’ve done a fic rec list yet, and I think I’ve done bits and pieces but not a full list. Fortunately, I just put one together for a friend who watched the film for the first time on Sunday, so I’ve got something close at hand! I’m keeping the category divisions I used for my friend, because I like them. I’m gonna star the E rated stuff for your avoidance/exact opposite of avoidance needs. Off we go!
Joe and Nicky (historical)
Ars Poetica by superblackmarket. Actually read everything by superblackmarket, they’re amazing. (*)
The Other Matter by survivah. Sometimes I lie awake at night staring at the ceiling thinking about this fic. If you like your Joe/Nicky get-together stories with a tall glass of pining/idiots to lovers, run don’t walk.
Salt and Harvest by @hollybennett123. Joe and Nicky + bread through the ages. Literally what more could you want.
for all hearts torn by stonecarved (figure8) (@lgbtmazight on tumblr). Joe and Nicky + pilgrimage. Len is one of the greatest gifts this fandom has.
The Gold of Your Body by @azephirin. This contains the tag “Catholicism as a gateway drug to BDSM” and it is. Incredible. (*)
The Subtle Approach by survivah. The great thing about this fandom is that your Regency AU doesn’t actually need to be an AU.
The Profession of my Fingers by mellyflori (@werebearbearbar on tumblr). 5+1, Nicky’s Hands In Joe’s Curls Throughout The Centuries (*)
Joe and Nicky (modern)
My heart as green as weeds by KatStratford (@katrinastratford on tumblr). In which they have to peace out to Scandinavia for Lying Low purposes and Joe Does Not Vibe with how cold it is. It’s a huge quarantine mood. (*)
While we’re young by hyb (@h-yb on tumblr). *pinches bridge of nose* listen they are IN LOVE
Stop, listen, feel, believe by Tam_Cranver. This is my favorite fic set almost immediately post-film. Hot as hell. Emotional intelligence off the FUCKING charts. (*)
Joe and Nicky + Nile + being immortal family
Three Immortals and a Puppy Walk Into a Bar by survivah. What it says on the tin, a fucking delight
A nice story and The art of remembrance by @sixth-light. Joe, Nicky, Nile, and discussions of war crimes.
Straight up Joe/Nicky smut, you are WELCOME (these are all E)
Taking instruction by @sixth-light. feat. light dom/sub, in a really sweet way.
Literally everything @bakedapplesauce has ever written, special shoutouts to:
The present is nothing but an interruption of the past
Hora somni
There is no “I” in “team” (but there is one in “vibrator”)
You want some Joe/Nicky AUs? I got you
Explaining is Losing by @sixth-light. Academic nemeses to lovers. I have read this fic an EMBARASSING number of times.
Good Enough to be True by @sixth-light. Modern AU, super soft fluff/healing where Joe’s gotten out of a terrible relationship and Nicky’s the first guy he’s dated since
sine qua non by mellyflori (@werebearbearbar). Modern AU friends to lovers with all the trimmings. (*)
Extremely niche genre of Nicky Bitches About The New English Mass Translation:
third for a word and the song keeps going by Macremae
INAIED gets its own heading
If Never Again, If Every Day by @gallifreyburning and @takiki16 is the light of my Thursdays. 2021 Nicky ends up back in 1099, 1099 Nicolo ends up in 2021, we all lose our minds over the emotions that ensue. Someone once described the 1099 plot of this fic as “Yusuf: I truly hate this and I’m annoyed that killing you doesn’t work. Nicky: You want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid.” I think about that description every fucking day.
Book of Nile (I know one of the rules of this ship is that you have to say you hate it here and were forced to ship it against your will but LISTEN these fics are so good that I can’t bring myself to hate it here at all)
The Last Man on Earth by survivah. Five times Booker and Nile find themselves in a romance novel trope. Delicious.
son rêve d’opaline by stonecarved (figure8) (@lgbtmazight). Sleepy. Sexy. I’m obsessed. (*)
everywhere on earth you go (you’re gonna have me) by nondz (pinkjook). There is a swing dancing scene in this one that I lost my fucking mind over. (*)
This is by no means comprehensive, and I encourage you to check out all the fics of all the authors mentioned here. I’m having a great time reading in this fandom.
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Writing asks: 5, 12, and 13
5. What’s your personal favorite fic you’ve written?
In the last year? Parallel. Still forever a standout. (I’m also really fond of Collision Course and the Royal AU as a whole).
Of all time? I’m not going to lie, The Stuff Of Legend might top the list for me. It may be six years old but it’s such a sweet one that I wrote to celebrate the end of one of my all-time favorite shows.
12. Tell us about something in a fic you’re really proud of yourself for writing.
Beyond the Breaking Point and its 2000 word single scene (more or less) stands out for me! I’ve said it before, but writing description and lingering in moments longer than absolutely necessary are both things I struggle with, and that story was an exercise in both and it turned out really well! I really love the feel of the whole thing, particularly this moment:
[David] leans back against the cold metal of the fire escape railing. It’s pressing against a bruise on his right side, and it hurts but David can’t bring himself to care. Jack being here hurts more.
I feel like I really nailed the feel I was going for, the whole thing is just so raw and emotional and it’s one of my faves even though it’s never gotten much attention.
13. Tell us about a detail from a fic that you’re dying to talk about.
hello and welcome back to the “finn talks about post rally fics” show, because it’s time to talk “you can’t undo the past”
and specifically I’m going to talk about the chapter titles! this is not the only small detail I want to talk about, but it’s the one i’m going with.
each chapter title is a lyric from the show, since once “and I wanna start brand new” hit me as an alternate title concept I couldn’t not include it somehow. Each one is relevant to the chapter somehow, at least subtly, and they (almost) all have a reference to time:
the first is “trapped where there ain’t no future” which is fairly self explanatory and made me laugh out loud when I thought of it
the second is “and I wanna start brand new” because it’s jack’s chance to try again AND it’s the loop where he makes to run for santa fe
the third is “gotta be either dead or dreaming” because it’s the one where jack more or less comes to terms with what’s happening, at least in as far as he’s pretty sure he’s died and gone to hell. shoutout to this chapter for including a catholicism joke!
the fourth is “answer the call and don’t delay” because it’s when he finally gets his out, but his hesitation to talk to davey himself costs him that chance
and the fifth is “and tomorrow won’t remind me of today” because it’s the iteration where the loop finally breaks!
ask about my process!
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Going Down the List #4: ‘Les Huguenots’, Montpellier, 1990
As any of you who have been following me for a long time know, this is one of my favorite operas and I am on a quest to find and watch every available filmed production of this opera. As such, this is my eighth production of Huguenots, and I think the best one I've seen. Here goes:
First things first, any review of a production of this opera has to include some commentary about cuts. I’m happy to say that there are very few of them, the most notable of which is the entire Act III ballet, which still isn’t a huge loss. There are minor cuts elsewhere, such as a section of the Raoul/Marguerite duet that I frequently forget exists (the section, not the whole duet), a small cut in the Act I window scene, a couple tiny cuts in ‘O beau pays de la Touraine’, and some of the Act III finale. Urbain’s Act II aria was omitted as well, but since it was an insert aria in the first place, I don’t see it as that huge of a loss even though I do love it and prefer when it is included.
Also, a warning: the video quality is not great. It’s not horrible, but it’s definitely not ideal. It’s still decent, though, especially for what I’m assuming is an upload of a video ripped from a 1990s TV broadcast of an official in-house recording. There are no subtitles either, which really stinks.
With that out of the way, the production: I’d overall describe it as ‘traditional minimalist with really wonderful direction’.
The sets are where the ‘minimalist’ part comes from: there are only really two sets, one of which is almost entirely white and the other of which is almost entirely black. The sets are slightly modified for each scene, but the first set is essentially ‘huge staircase (most of the time also featuring a couple long tables and a ridiculous number of chairs)’ and the second is essentially a huge open space with black walls, a lot of graffiti that is mostly illegible, and some cut-out door openings. Although personally, I’d prefer a little more detail and variety, I do overall like the sets and I think they work well.
The costumes are beautiful period fashion; the problem with them, however, is that apparently the costume designer thought it would be a good idea to dress large groups of people exactly the same. This is especially a problem with the various Catholic noblemen, to the point where it took me a few minutes to figure out who was playing Nevers because all the Catholic noblemen in Act I wore the exact same outfit. (Perhaps this would have been less of a problem if the video quality were better.) Still, they are gorgeous costumes.
If I had to describe the direction in five words, they’d be, “nuanced, vivacious, and emotionally intense”. I especially love how much the chorus actually moves! That may sound silly, but it’s nice to have an actual street riot in Act III or a frenzied, whipped-up mass of Catholic nobles declaring anathema on the Huguenots in Act IV instead of having the chorus just stand there and sing prettily. The chorus also does an excellent job of reacting in general: they laugh at Nevers’ witty comments, they enthusiastically respond to the calls for a massacre, they recoil in horror when Raoul details the scenes of death and destruction. And the way the ending was staged─ you just had to rip out my heart, didn’t you? That’s all I’ll say about that.
There are some togetherness issues between the onstage forces and the pit; however, these are relatively minor. The orchestra (and its soloists) are very good; the chorus is amazing. Whether it’s a particularly fortuitous sound balance or just a really present chorus, they are always a force to be reckoned with on a scale I don’t think I’ve even heard on any other recording. And as I mentioned earlier, they’re not just great singers, but also great actors. Same goes for the various small roles, with a special shoutout to the six supporting Catholic nobles, who all sound good, look good, and work together very well.
Now for the seven leads:
Danielle Borst was a very adorable Urbain who happened to be dressed like she was from The Addams Family or something (including what appeared to be a very unfortunate black bobbed wig). Regardless, she was all cheer and enthusiasm in the classic trouser-role mold (along with the obligatory flirting with everyone) with a really, really fantastic voice, and she lit up the stage whenever she was on it, whether she was standing on a table or chugging a bottle of wine (during ‘O beau pays’) or spying on the ladies-in-waiting from under a sheet. Her ‘Nobles seigneurs, salut’ in particular was one of the best I’ve ever heard, and I think it’s really a shame she didn’t get a shot at ‘Non, vous n’avais jamais, je gage’.
Marc Barrard was a fantastic Nevers. His voice is really nice and lyrical and beautiful, although owing to the fact that the role is a) relatively short and b) doesn’t have any big solos or even small ensembles, he didn’t get much of a chance to show it off. As a result, as with all baritones playing this role, whether his performance succeeded or not depended on his dramatic skill. He delivered. Depending on what was happening, he was extremely flamboyant, official, gentle, and/or morally outraged— and he managed to do that without overacting, which I appreciate.
Jean-Pierre Courtis absolutely nailed it as the Comte de Saint-Bris. His voice is not particularly subtle, but then again, the character isn’t either. What his voice is is commanding and surprisingly beautiful. Seriously. It’s gorgeous. As he should, he absolutely dominated the Conspiracy Scene and came across as very cold, no-nonsense, but still intensely devoted to his country, his faith, and his own ideas about how they should be─ in short, absolutely fanatical. And I said earlier I wouldn’t give away any details about the staging of the ending, but I will here: after discovering his dying daughter, he did something I haven’t seen any other Saint-Bris do that just wrenched my heart: he walked (or to be more precise, backed) offstage. It was pretty ambiguous, but I think it’s the only portrayal I’ve seen that suggested he didn’t really regret anything he did.
Anyway, they were both awesome.
Ghyslaine Raphanel definitely did right by Marguerite de Valois. Her voice is very light and may take some getting used to (it did for me), but overall it’s a beautiful sound that I think works well for this part. In particular, she has some serious coloratura chops, which she took every opportunity to display (including by far the longest ‘O beau pays’ cadenza I have ever heard). She’s also very good at playing the young, charismatic, beautiful royal who wants peace and love but is completely detached from reality, to the point where she still can’t believe what’s happening even when Raoul tells her about the massacre in Act V, scene 1 (the scene ends with her climbing the staircase, turning around, and looking at all the Huguenot noblewomen as if to say ‘…I have no clue what the hell just happened’).
I really loved John Macurdy’s performance as Marcel. His basic voice isn’t my favorite by any means, but I can absolutely say it’s a good voice, with particularly strong low notes. And he’s a great actor! I especially loved his ‘Piff, paff’, for this exact reason: you can hear the hatred Marcel has for Catholicism and women in the way he sings every word. And he has amazing stage presence: even just a little thing, like a gesture at Raoul or the way he put an arm around Valentine and walked her back into the church in Act III, said so much. In other words, he may not be my favorite bass, but he’s a good singer and a virtually perfect dramatic match for the part.
Nelly Miricioiu was a wonderful Valentine de Saint-Bris. Personally, I love her voice although there are some things about it I could see people not liking. Nevertheless, it’s a gorgeous voice that fits the role well, and she’s amazing at everything she does, especially in her two big duets and the final scene. She’s also a very, very good actress who does one of the best acting jobs I’ve seen in this role, and that is no shabby feat, especially in the eyes of yours truly (who once wrote several pages about her character development and posted it on this very blog, although almost no one read it lol). That development I talked about, from very anxious, fragile, and shy to boldly defiant? She absolutely got it.
Gregory Kunde was absolutely phenomenal as Raoul de Nangis. His voice is pretty much perfection in this role, which is especially an achievement considering how many ways the part is demanding─ he has lyric moments and huge dramatic ones alike, and let’s not forget all the insanely high notes! But he nailed it, especially the two arias, which are both very hard in very different ways. Also, his acting was on point: I got all the little bits of his personality─ the romantic dreaminess, the idealism, the moral outrage, the impulsiveness, the stubbornness, all of it. There are so many good little details, from his frequent hesitations at drinking to the fact that even though there’s a massacre going on and he’s trying to rescue the Huguenot nobles, he still takes a few seconds at the end of his Act V aria to bow to Marguerite (and be like, ‘uh, sorry for ruining your big party’) before rushing out. Bravo!
Overall Verdict: Definite recommend; this would be a great first production for anyone wanting to watch this opera, albeit with two caveats: one, there are no subtitles (but I’d be more than happy to send anyone the French-English libretto I have on Google Drive), and two, this production may ruin you for others that are…not of the same quality. 😉
Up next: Due to ongoing difficulties with the Internet at my house, I am going to have to suspend this series until further notice, but as soon as I can, I’ll be doing the 2019 Il trovatore from Beijing!
#opera#opera tag#les huguenots#meyerbeer#giacomo meyerbeer#this was GREAT#going down the list#sorry everyone this series is being suspended until further notice because technical difficulties#but oh well!
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The Devil in Star City (Laurel/Nyssa; T) - Part I
Ships: Laurel/Nyssa
Summary: "My name is Laurel Lance. When I was eight years old I was in a car accident that left me without sight. But in the process, my other senses were heightened.
By day, I am a defence attorney, ready to fight for justice in the courtroom on behalf of those who the law has failed. By night, I am someone else. I am something else.
I am Daredevil."
A/N: So this is a fic that's been a few weeks in the making. I have recently been sucked into the world of Marvel's Netflix verse (I'm sure there's a proper name for it lol) and the first show I watched was Daredevil. I've since become slightly obsessed with the idea of Laurel as Matt, just because they have a lot of parallels in their journeys and that's really interesting to watch.
Shoutout and much love to @therewas-a-girl for the initial idea, and endless thanks to @sophiainspace for reading this over for me and giving me much-needed honest feedback.
Read at AO3
The kitchen of an opulent restaurant was buzzing when Laurel and Joanna stepped in. Laurel didn’t exactly like busy places, but she couldn’t deny that the bustle of the place helped camouflage two law students who had no business at a fancy Performing Arts faculty party on New Year’s Eve.
“Laurel, are you sure you wanna be here?” Joanna asked, spearing a crab cake with her fork and taking a bite.
“Good, huh?” Laurel said with a grin, and Joanna shook her head.
“How did you know I -”
“I have this weird sixth sense.” And of course Laurel was still smiling - because she didn’t have to be able to see to know that Joanna was rolling her eyes in fond exasperation. “Makes up for the one I lack.”
“Sure, babe. But I just mean - I know this kind of thing isn’t your scene.”
Sixth sense or not, Laurel had a feeling she knew what would be coming next, so before Joanna could say anything further, Laurel said, “I’m parched. Gonna get something to drink.”
“Want me to come with?”
“No, I know you wanted to catch your server buddy after her shift. Just, uh, do us all a favour, okay, Jo, and kiss her already?” Laurel reached out, patted Joanna’s cheek and got out her cane. “Which way is the bar?”
For a few moments Joanna spluttered, then, regaining her composure, she said, “Straight ahead and to your left.” Laurel was already turning around, and it was only when she was a few feet away that she heard Joanna call to her, “And for the last time - Kendra’s just a friend!”
Laurel didn’t break in her stride, though, or her laugh, because she could hear Kendra Saunders’ footsteps from here and knew she was most definitely in earshot. “Does she know that, Jo?”
The thing was, Joanna wasn’t wrong. These parties weren’t exactly Laurel’s thing - not by a long shot. But even Laurel had to admit that college was lonely.
It wasn’t that law school wasn’t right for Laurel. She knew she belonged in that courtroom, had known it from the moment she did her first mock trial. It was more that sometimes the weight of all the books and all the cases and all the statutes were so damn heavy that when she finally had a day without them, she wondered what was left of herself. Especially when she remembered how much it had taken for her to get here in the first place.
But tonight she was determined to try and do something different. It was New Year’s Eve, after all. So she headed out of the kitchen and towards the bar, conscious of the eyes on her. Laurel wasn’t sure if it was her attire, or the dark glasses, or maybe just some other neon sign that told everyone in the room that she was blind, alone and (technically) gatecrashing. In particular, though, she could sense several not-so discreet security guards hovering around her. Laurel tried to get past - she really did need a drink - but two guards stepped in her way.
“I think you’re done here,” one of them said quietly.
“But I was just looking for -”
“Walk away, ma’am.”
“I -”
“It’s okay, Maseo,” a voice on the left said. It was in that silky, casual kind of tone that told Laurel immediately that unlike Laurel, this woman did belong here. “She’s with me.”
Wordlessly, the men instantly ceased their obstruction of Laurel’s path, allowing her to pass through.
“Thanks for the assist,” Laurel said, drawing up a stool and sitting beside this woman. “But I had that under control.”
“Is that so?” The woman leaned forward, so Laurel was breathing in the warm scent of her perfume - narcissus, if she wasn’t mistaken, and perhaps sandalwood, a fragrance that was probably French and undeniably expensive. “Because I think you and I both know that that’s not true.”
Undeterred, Laurel leaned forward too - just an inch, but enough to stand her ground. Besides, there was something (maybe the foreign accent, or the faint scent of lipstick that Laurel could smell on the woman’s lips) about this mysterious woman that intrigued Laurel. “And what makes you say that, exactly?”
A pause. Then: “The fishnets were a dead giveaway, really.”
Laurel chuckled. “Touché.”
“Not that they don’t look pretty on you -”
“Well, thank you for the compliment,” Laurel interrupted. “I think.”
“- but if you’re going to crash a fancy faculty party, at least try to look the part. You know. Like your gorgeous friend over there who's pretending not to be in love with that waitress.”
“She is really bad at that, isn’t she?” Laurel said, not quite sure how to reply to the rest, before waving over the bartender. “Hi, can I have an orange juice, please? And, uh, another fruity cocktail for my friend here.” She paused, then added, “Pardon me - another fruity mocktail.”
“You don’t have to -”
“Maybe I want to. Besides, it’s not every day I find someone at a party who doesn’t wanna get drunk. So what was your poison?”
For the first time since Laurel sat down at that bar, the woman hesitated. “I - I don’t think I understand.”
“Mine was scotch.” Reaching into her purse, she pulled out her keys, feeling for her AA chip. “I’m six months sober. Hence the lack of booze.”
Another pause. “Congratulations.”
“Thanks. So what’s your excuse?”
“Most people need an excuse to drink, not the opposite.”
“I have a feeling you’re not most people, though.”
“How many women do you use that line on, Miss...”
“Lance,” Laurel supplied. “And that is usually the only line I need to use.” She heard the woman scoff at that, and then Laurel laughed. “I’m kidding. I’m… not exactly a catch, nowadays. Don’t think I ever have been, actually.”
She expected the woman to sigh, maybe in exasperation, but instead the stranger before her leaned forward so Laurel could feel the flutter of warm breath against her neck.
“To answer your question - I suppose I have never felt the need to drink… poison to feel intoxicated.”
And indeed, when Laurel breathed in the heady smell of the woman’s perfume, for a second she was lost in the warm cloud of fragrance that settled on Laurel the closer she got.
“I see what you mean,” Laurel replied, and she wasn’t sure if she was thankful or annoyed that the spell was broken by another voice.
“Your orange juice, ma’am,” the bartender said, and Laurel felt the cold, damp press of glass against her fingertips as her hand found her drink. “And another one of your usual, Miss Raatko.”
“Thank you,” the two women said in unison. Laurel took a sip of hers, letting out a deep breath.
“My name’s Nyssa, by the way. Nyssa Raatko.”
Laurel held out her hand and smiled. “Laurel. Laurel Lance.” Nyssa took her hand to shake it, but just as she did so they were interrupted by the bang of fireworks outside, and Laurel almost jumped.
“Jesus,” she muttered as she righted herself, grateful for her hold on Nyssa’s hand for a moment before tugging it away. Her grip returned to her drink. “It can’t be midnight already, can it?”
“No,” Nyssa said, and she reached out again, her fingertips ghosting Laurel’s knuckles but not quite touching her. Like she was waiting for Laurel to tell her it was okay. “It's probably some of the residents nearby who are just impatient.”
“Well, good for them.” And Laurel didn't want to say that bitterly, she really didn't, but it came out that way nonetheless and she could tell Nyssa had noticed.
“I'm sorry,” Nyssa said softly.
“For what?”
“I…” She paused, taking a long sip of her drink. “I get the sense that you've had a rough year.”
“You don’t know the half of it, sweetheart.”
“So perhaps me talking about you not belonging wasn't one of my better choices.”
Laurel chuckled, fiddling with her straw. “That’s okay. I don’t think I have any of those. Good choices, I mean.” She heard Nyssa scoff. “You don’t need to look at me like that.”
“You can’t possibly know -”
“I’m blind, not stupid. Even if people think those things are one and the same. I can tell you feel sorry for me -”
“No I don’t,” Nyssa interrupted. “I get the feeling that you have enough pity to go around - and not for the reasons people might think.”
“You’re not wrong.” Almost unconsciously Laurel touched the crucifix resting against the hollow of her neck, then shrugged. “That part is Catholicism.”
“No, you misunderstand… this - isn’t pity. Or even sympathy.” Laurel must have still looked scathing, because then Nyssa added, “Trust me, I would have to have a heart for that.”
Nyssa didn't know, couldn't, how very wrong about that she was, when Laurel could hear the steady thump of Nyssa's heartbeat from where she sat beside her. But of course - Laurel couldn't tell her that.
Just then there was another bang from outside, and Laurel didn't jump this time, thankfully, but there was no mistaking the disconcerted feeling that went through her. And once more Nyssa's fingers were suddenly near her own, brushing against the inside Laurel's wrist.
Perhaps this was accidental, though, because this time Nyssa was the one who made to pull her hand away. Before she could, though, and before Laurel could let herself think about it a second longer, Laurel caught Nyssa's with her own.
“Wanna dance?” she asked. She tried to keep her tone even, nonchalant, but hearing Nyssa's heart start to race didn't help matters.
“I sense you're mocking me. How can you…?”
Before she could talk herself out of it, Laurel reached out, hand fluttering around Nyssa's arm, past the bangles that sounded lightly at the skim of Laurel's fingertips. It was clumsy, but she didn't mind - she wanted to savour this moment, in case it was just a moment, in case it didn't last.
“I'm serious,” Laurel said, somehow managing to sound playful. “Here -” she offered her hand “- you can lead. I promise I won't embarrass you by falling.”
This is why she didn't do this - it was so fucking daunting to wear her heart on her sleeve like this, knowing that someone could so easily trample on it, break it in two, even. But God knew why - there was just something about Nyssa. Something that made Laurel want to kiss her hard and breathless, so she could have a taste of that lipstick.
Laurel was surprised, therefore, when she felt Nyssa's hand slide into her own, and the faint whisper of breath against the shell of her ear as she leaned closer. And Laurel didn't mean to shiver, but she did, huffing out a long drawn out sigh.
“Laurel, if you fall,” Nyssa said quietly, barely audible, as if somehow she knew that Laurel could hear her loud and clear, “I promise I’ll catch you.”
“My hero,” Laurel couldn't help but say sarcastically.
Nyssa tutted at that, but it was more at herself, clearly. “Sorry, I didn’t mean - I deserved that.”
“Three guesses for what I deserve,” Laurel replied, and despite her blunder Nyssa laughed. Then Laurel held out her other hand, found Nyssa's, and got to her feet.
“I suppose I do owe you a dance.”
Laurel started off a little clumsy - she was out of practice, not having danced in years, but at least she managed not to tread on Nyssa’s feet.
It was therefore genuine surprise on her face when Nyssa murmured, “You know, you're not awful at this. I mean, for a -”
“I really hope you’re not gonna say what I think you are,” Laurel interrupted, and Nyssa chuckled.
“I was actually going to say for a white woman - but I can understand you may take offence to that too.”
This time Laurel couldn't hold back a laugh. “Not in the slightest.”
“I am sorry, though. About before. Truly.” Laurel's change in demeanour must have shown on her face, because Nyssa quickly added, “I know you've probably heard that a thousand times before.”
“So why are you saying it too?”
“In all honesty - I wasn't sure what else to say.”
“I didn't ask you to say anything,” Laurel whispered, taking a moment to lean her forehead against Nyssa's. “Just dance.”
And dance they did, just as a song bursting with the sound of tango started up. Laurel moved with Nyssa, faster, Laurel guessing Nyssa's next moves a split second before Nyssa made them. It was thrilling in the rare kind of way that made Laurel's heart race, perhaps because it was almost like when she had trained as a child - except this time she was in the arms of a woman she instinctively trusted, for some reason even Laurel herself couldn’t figure out.
Letting Nyssa spin her around, they were in sync now, feet moving in tandem. Around her, Laurel could hear the whip of heads turning, feel the gaze of at least a dozen people boring into her and her dance partner.
“You must be really beautiful or something,” Laurel said under her breath as Nyssa's hand moved to the small of Laurel's back and Laurel threw her head backwards in time for a dip.
“What makes you say that?” Nyssa asked breathlessly, her nose less than an inch away from Laurel's.
“I can tell you're turning a lot of heads. Everyone's staring at you.”
“No, everyone is staring at us. It seems you dance rather elegantly, Miss Lance.”
The crescendo of the song sounded, and Laurel wasn't sure if it was the thrumming pulse of Nyssa's she could hear, so intense and wanting, as Laurel was the one to spin Nyssa around this time, or just because she hadn't felt this alive in such a long time, but before Laurel could stop to think about it she leaned in and kissed Nyssa full on the mouth.
At first Nyssa let out a little oh of surprise, the tiniest sigh that escaped her lips, and then Nyssa pulled her closer and kissed her back with equal fervour.
What Laurel had envisaged for this party, she wasn't entirely sure. Part of her had been wishful and had naively hoped for a kiss at midnight, under the fireworks, perhaps, erupting across the stars that littered the night sky. But instead, around her the sounds starting up were not of Catherine Wheels and sparklers - no, as Laurel pulled back a little, leaning her forehead against Nyssa's, the crowd that had circled around them burst into rapturous applause.
“So,” Laurel said softly, holding out her hand, and Nyssa automatically took it, helping Laurel stand up properly, “you wanna grab dinner tomorrow?”
#lauryssa#laurel x nyssa#laurel lance#nyssa al ghul#arrow#arrow fanfiction#daredevil au#mattelektra au#mine#my fic#otp: dinner's on me#fic: the devil in star city
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I think my roommate kind of knows my next fic project is a priest AU because I’ve had a surprising amount of opinions about priest celibacy lately.
I used to hate priest AUs but I saw fanart for a shippy priest AU that was like, really good, but the character that was the priest is kind of a crass douchebag, so I was like “how would that even work,” and I thought about it long enough that I was like “okay I can see how that would work, I could easily write this fic if someone asked me to” and of course that led to just, wanting to write the fic
The thing is every time I’ve tried to read a priest AU I’ve busted out laughing and closed the tab because I grew up Catholic and you cannot convince me that priests can be sexy or attractive in any capacity, even the ones that aren’t altogether bad-looking. But I think part of that was my discomfort with the idea that breaking a vow of celibacy could ever be sexy when it is An Affront To God but now that I’m not Catholic anymore I don’t anticipate running into that particular mental block again.
And now that I’ve looked into the topic more I’ve realized that priestly celibacy is even more bullshit than I thought it was. Basically my stance while I was still Catholic was “the fact that priests have to take a vow of celibacy is bullshit, but if you make a promise to God you should probably keep it; also, if you get caught and you’re overall very unlucky, they might actually kick you out of the priesthood and that Is Bad,” because my Catholicism was very bound up in my fear and anxiety about being punished by anyone, God or man
But now I’m kind of like. Eh. Is being fired from the priesthood really the worst thing ever. It’s not like they’re going to excommunicate you probably. People get fired from their jobs all the time and they survive. If you’re boning down with someone in a major way you’re probably not super committed to being a priest anyway.
(There are exceptions; I know plenty of priests who would be devastated if they ever had to stop being a priest because it’s very important to them, but statistically speaking about half of all Catholic priests have not remained celibate in the sense of abstinent for their entire priesthood so idk I think people are just capable of a lot of cognitive dissonance)
Also I learned today that the vow of celibacy is “discipline, not doctrine” which means that the Church could easily any day now just be like “yeah let’s not anymore” and it would by no means change the core teachings of Catholicism in a considerable way. So what the fuck.
Shoutout to Father Joe who was my school’s priest in middle school who was outspoken about how priests should be able to get married and women should be able to be priests. Just a general shoutout I guess for teaching me that you can be devout and still seriously question your religion (which is a lesson that applies to many things) but also specific shoutout for pointing out this specific bullshit and supporting a reasonable solution to the dire worldwide shortage of Catholic priests.
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WRITE LEFT - contextualizing the LA in slavery
In May 2017, I published a zine called ‘write left: selections and reflections from the author’s late night #WikipediaWanderings.’ It contains 3 essays inspired by my amateur research into the history of southern California. Here is the first piece.
Recently, my partner was given the opportunity to spend some time in the South. Neither of us were familiar with the area, and we didn’t know what he should expect. We’d heard a tale of two regions. The first view was defined by one of its namesakes - Southern hospitality, where people on the street give you a friendly hello, strangers welcomed you into their home with open arms and a pitcher of sweet tea, a genteel demeanor in strong contrast to the fast-paced city nature of “the North”.
We were quicker to think of the South in the other light, one brought about from its history as the American epicenter of enslavement, debasement and cruelty that is the chattel slave system of Africans/ African-Americans in the 18th and 19th centuries. Where people still proudly flew Confederate flags as if oblivious to the pain and turmoil of black life that that symbol represented. We could tell that the foundations of racism and hatred ran deep, and my partner (white but woke) wondered about walking amongst them.
Of course, we were judging from afar, as we lived in California, the biggest blue state in the nation. Racism was, is and continues to oppressively dictate the lives of people of color in our great state; for a small sampling see pernicious ICE raids & LAPD targeting of black and brown bodies. But the South! Didn’t the systematic barbarity of the transatlantic slave trade take evil to a whole ‘nother level?
As if I could point the finger away from the land I live.
I recall vividly when my 5th grade teacher told our class that America (which I’d only ever been taught to see as the best most freedomest nation ever) was responsible and must account for 2 great evils in its history: how we treated Africans/ African-Americans and the indigenous people of this land**. I don’t mean to minimize the destruction of life methodically achieved through the Southern slavery system, but why am I so quick to bring up one evil, and not that which has been wrought upon the first peoples of this nation?
As an Angelena, I too live in a land that has enslaved members of another race and assumed their inferiority. That this has been perpetrated by the 3 powers that claimed their rule over this land - Spain, Mexico, and finally the U.S. - does not lessen our culpability in owning up to this past.
It was under Spanish rule that in 1799 Padre Antonio de la Concepcion Horra reported, “The treatment shown to the Indians is the most cruel I have ever read in history. For the slightest things, they receive heavy flogging, are shackeled and put in the stocks, and treated with so much cruelty that they are kept whole days without water.” In elementary school in California, children learn about the Spanish missions, making their own replica and going on a field trip to visit the historical site. What is often missing from the lesson is how they were built with Indian labor, with the express purpose of converting Native Americans to Catholicism, after which the native people of the land were forced to live within the settlements and work for the Spanish. Runaways and rebels were punished harshly, but throughout this period, Native Americans resisted their colonizers through uprisings and other attempts to achieve their freedom from bondage.
It was under Mexican rule that the missions and other large land estates were awarded to wealthy ranchos, who counted on the native population as their labor force. Native Americans had no choice but to enter this pact; if they did not, their villages would be raided and their labor would be taken by force anyway. Going further, in 1846, Mexico’s Assembly passed resolutions calling for funding to locate and demolish Indian villages.
It was under American rule where in 1850 state legislators legalized white custody of Indian minors and prisoner leasing. Ten years later, they legalized the “indenture” of “any Indian,” which triggered an increase in violent kidnappings of Indian people. As one lawyer at the time put it “Los Angeles had its slave mart [and] thousands of honest, useful people were absolutely destroyed in this way.”
And during this whole time, the Native American population fell at an incredible rate, further decimated by the onslaught of European diseases. This point is important, because sadly, one of the main reasons our public education fails to acknowledge our genocide of Native Americans is because America has so totally accomplished its goal of annihilation of indigenous people.
Or as comedian Solomon Georgio puts it: “The Native Americans as a people have suffered the worse genocide in human history. Some may say, hey Solomon what about the Holocaust? And I wouldn’t take that away from anyone, the Holocaust was a terrible, terrible tragedy. However…I have seen 10 or more Jewish people in the same room. I haven’t seen 10 Native Americans…in my life. They used to live right here.”
In Mexico, self-identified indigenous people make up 21.5% of the population. In Canada, it’s 4.2%. In USA, the indigenous population is only 1.4% of the general population. The USA has been the most systematically cutthroat in ending the lives of its native peoples, and as a result, it is possible in today’s world to not be visibly reminded of their presence.
But it is our duty to empathize, feel into their struggle, and most importantly act in solidarity with these communities. Here is an incomplete list of concrete steps we can take today, most local to the Los Angeles area:
- We can support indigenous-led movements such as the movement against the Dakota Access Pipeline and divestment efforts from banks that support the destruction of Native American land. In June 2017, LA City Council, pressured by the indigenous-led Divest L.A. movement, voted unanimously to divest over $40 million in investments from Wells Fargo.
- We can pressure LA City Council to follow the example of other cities and turn Columbus Day into Indigenous Peoples Day, as well as formally recognize the genocide of the Native American people. In August 2017, LA did just that, replacing Columbus Day with Indigenous Peoples Day.
- We can join the new petition to decolonize our children’s education when it comes to learning about the Spanish missions, recentering the narrative to focus on “the impact and daily life of the native population within these missions.” The 2nd CA Indian Curriculum Summit happened at Sacramento State on October 2017, with the purpose to “provide 3rd and 4th grade teachers with California Indian vetted replacement units that address Common Core Standards.”
- We can use our money to support Native American stories, media and art, such as film festivals like LA Skins Fest. The next LA Skins Fest happens annually in November at TCL Chinese Theater in Hollywood. Find out more at www.laskinsfest.com.
As expected, my partner survived the South. What he saw was appalling - “Drunk Lives Matter” on a T-shirt, a man trying to start a fight as my partner booed a parade’s Confederate flag. But peeking into that world through him, made me think about mine. We can’t even get it right in CA, a state that prides itself on its “progressive values”. For the indigenous people of this land, and for us, the descendants of settlers, who are committed to living by our values and fighting for the liberation of all peoples, it’s time to act. Let’s start locally, in the place that we’re in, with the hope that everyone else is thinking the same.
**Shoutout to Mr. Sig for keeping it real! Although - only 2 evils? The Chinese laborers of the nineteenth century, Japanese families forced into internment camps during WW2, Latino youth of the ‘Zoot Suit Riots’ and many other marginalized groups beg to differ…
References “Demographics of Canada.” Wikipedia “Demographics of Mexico.” Wikipedia “Demographics of the United States.” Wikipedia “A History of American Indians in California.” Five Views: An Ethnic Historic Site Survey for California. National Park Service. November 17, 2004 “History of Enslavement of Indigenous Peoples in California.” Wikipedia “History of Los Angeles.” Wikipedia Madley, Benjamin. “It’s time to acknowledge the genocide of California’s Indians.” Los Angeles Times. May 22, 2016 “Repeal, Replace and Reframe the 4th Grade Mission Project.” California Indian Curriculum. Sacramento State. “Solomon Georgio Stand-Up 02/10/15 - Conan on TBS”
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I am just a rando passing through but I love your logh thoughts. PLEASE do a fandom meme for my man yang
I’M GLAD. this is the optimum time for soliciting logh thoughts/general logh chat, and so
How I feel about this character: Yang is such a distilled “just add water” fave that I ended up frequently annoyed with both him and myself for my susceptibility to his bullshit—I never had the “fuck your PRINCIPLES, NED STARK” moment with actual Ned Stark but I cannot say the same for Mr Representative Government. Okay, not so much “fuck your principles” as “fuck your trauma,” a less graceful reaction. Whatever, at the end of the day I have to accept that I love irresolute ‘ ‘ ‘realists’ ’ ‘ whose ideals aren’t synonymous with their cowardice but do feed off it. also, laziness representation. laziness-actively-destroying-your-life-and-dreams representation.
All the people I ship romantically with this character: Surely the joy of LOGH is… indiscriminately shipping gravitational anomaly leads with anyone who interacts with them…. so, Frederica, Schonkopf, Reinhard, Jessica Edwards’ sardonic phantom, Cazelne sort of… … … …I obviously don’t “ship” Yang and Hilda but I kept wishing they would have an explicit shadow faceoff of some kind, since they were my two faves and had some weird parallels. AU where yang’s job is to destabilize the imperial government instead.
My non-romantic OTP for this character: Julian! I mean romantic/non-romantic is a false binary in terms of Julian’s horrifying crush but like… Julian.
My unpopular opinion about this character: I was not as sad as I expected to be about his death, which seemed somewhat merciful, although I am sad that it didn’t lead to “endgame villain: CATHOLICISM” making more sense to me. also I guess as semi-discussed above, I don’t actually think his problem was being too married to his principles, although I don’t know if that’s a popular opinion to begin with … but it’s floated a few times in-show, so.
One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: More kidnappings i’m insatiable. no. What? Um, a little more interiority/emotional insight up to the end, esp re: his feelings toward Frederica and ~the revolution~
my het ship: my Frederica/Yang interests are sort of Frederica-focused and aftermath-focused, so, I guess Jessica?? kind of? No nvm I wanted to shoutout to my genuine Yang–>Jessica fondness but it’s still Frederica. realistically all my Yang ships are either “I enjoyed them as exes” or “I enjoyed how he was too avoidant to do more than conspire with the other person against himself,” he’s that kind of lump
my fem/slash ship: Schonkopf… may every reluctant hero be blessed with as manipulative a bruiser…
my OTP: julian/starry-eyed middle-aged historians who read his Commentary on yang’s secret blog
my OT3: he does Not have the attention span
my crossover ship: Sisko. I think it would be just so nice for Yang to have a superior who yelled at him because he deserved it. Or, again, Duv Galeni, I’m not strong.
my kink: trial scenes. whenever someone tries to locate his better nature to appeal to it.
a headcanon fact: I sort of assume Yang’s alcoholism derives not from Environmental Pressures or burnout but from his academy friends dragging him to parties as a teenager, and then forgetting about him once there, and being not at all prepared for him to steadily and inconspicuously drink his way through an entire table of vodka kool-aid shots in the back room. social anxiety is so powerful.
my gender bend: Idk, scuttled around the lower ranks forever and then killed?? or I guess if El Facil still happened then uhhhh turned into a weird mascot and… later killed. I don’t understand LOGH gender roles well enough to answer this, or rather I have willfully blinded myself to them. sighs. f Yang would be even funnier as joint adoptee of the Cazelnes’ marriage though… fake marriage plots with her in general for bullshit undercover purposes… I’d read that garbage. “Kircheis hits on her politely at the meet and greet and she refers to it as graverobbing”
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