#should i make lore posts about my ocs? is that something yall would be into?

[puckpocketed]

hello i was tagged by @18minutemajor for WIP Wednesday. it is not Wednesday but i am also not a cop so . here we gooo!!!!!!! tagging my esteemed colleagues (very politely and with no pressure!!!):

@neonfretra @oensible @sorrellegiance @moregraceful @stereax

@wheelsnipecelebrini

@korshrimpski (EDIT: it won’t?? let me tag you. unless these are on separate lines <3)

what's in-progress in your life <3 writing? art? recipe? skill acquisition?

if any crafty people see this - if ANYONE sees this - and would like to join in, feel free and consider yourself tagged <3 (and tag me back so i can see your stuff!!!) link to 18minutemajor's post if yall curious :3 my VERY long wip dump + ramblings under the cut!

its christmas soon and i like to paint gifts for my friends + and i'm finally revisiting my anime/lineart/inking era (here you are K!! my lineart past, present, and future!! <3) so here are some things i've been working on/coming back to/MAY NEVER FINISH: hockey related:

this is juraj slafkovsky and his dinky little middle part which he can absolutely learn to style into something a little less dinky but never does. i am so charmed by him. i imagine he just rocks it because his pretty privilege supersedes dinky middle parts . LMAO!!

here is Sasuke from my Naruto Hockey AU. I am a little stuck on jersey mockups lol. here he is. our haunted little 1OA who is absolutely normal and regular about his captain (LOUD incorrect buzzer):

personal oc art

wanna know some puckpocketed deep lore? i've never been one to make OCs. i was just not a very creative kid tbh. spent all my time drawing sailor moon instead. i still go back to her sometimes because she is one of my favourite shapes in the WORLD!!

in my 20s i took up playing d&d because of the. uh. plague. <3 and got pretty close to having OCs!! those count right? anyway. here is my tavern-wench-turned-wizard!!! i think i painted this 2 years ago? <- put dates on your works guys it saves lives. her name is Mel (short for Melins (pronounced like melons. on account of her knockers. can you tell i never grew out of my 12 yr old booby/cock joke era?) i revisited Mel recently and have started painting her in earnest again!! :3

I briefly dated someone who was very into streetwear and fashion, and I fell down a techwear/gorpcore/cyberpunk rabbit hole for a couple days out of curiosity. i remember literally zero salient info on any of it except the broad strokes of silhouetting and Vibes. what i emerged with, however, was a ?? sorta OC?? im not sure what to call them. they dont rly have a name or gender. I did this little sheet ages ago + the aborted attempt at a portrait later:

Here are my most recent explorations (i have been doing SOOOO much art. <3) which include:

unfinished character sheet + chibi art. I played with their jacket (much more structured/square/tailored thing) and added a lotta random buckles and belts. i took textiles class years ago and have a little experience in garment construction. and i know for a fact this thing does not make any sense. it hurts me to look at a little bit LMAO so i've paused it while i go draft patterns (badly. i was never good at drafting. i think i may have to break out my scrap fabric stash and hand sew a real life mock-up. HELP!)

here is me having fun with them and imagining them as some kind of cyber-fisherman. the best part of every game is the fishing mini-game to me. i love fishing mini-games so much. I made their hair really big because i wanted them to have big unwieldy hair and the vibes told me i should add more movement to the piece aside from the fishing line. I messed with their jacket AGAIN because i can't stop thinking about what kinda jacket they'd wear. gorp-core ? idk. it sure is something!

gifts for my friends :3

back in my weeb era for real YAYYYY!!! up til now i'd been making hockey art using a zero pressure sensitivity pen brush because i simply did NOT want to deal with that. it is and has always been a barrier to me making art that uses line art. <3 easing my way back into it though!

I used to paint gifts for my friends and then get them printed into lil posters and mount them on nice backing :3 i am now ready and back to painting.

Here is my girlbestie's OC. just a rough pose sketch. i think im pretty unsatisfied with the gesture of the head/hand. i wanted to include her gun in some way. i fear i may have to rework the pose entirely <3

For the genshin girlies.. here are some of my friends fave characters.

Yelan - this one i started many holidays ago and put on the backburner because the colouring was wigging me out. you can see where i started rendering stuff + got sidetracked and started on something else (the crystal choker IM LAUGHING @ past me...)

Ayaka - I reaaally like what i did here with the perspective + foreshortening. I don't know if the pose or expression is in-character or not, but i had fun :3 got stunlocked looking at references of genshin weapons so this is where i left off:

if you made it all the way down here hi... <3 ice hockey really cracked the ketchup bottle open for me when it comes to making art again. i love the communities i've found, and i'm inspired by every artist on here every day. thanks for being so cool + have a great day :)

[trebuchet151]

Hi! I just wanted to say, your art is beautiful! I'm so glad I found you through the Fallen Hero fandom, and can't wait to see more of Corey and get to know them better. They stole my heart.

Also I'm very curious about the kind of Rook you plan to play and who you'll romance!

Hi!!! Thank you so much!

I'm so happy you like Corey, theyre a very special OC to me so im glad I can share them with people now. I draw them lots but for some reason never render it like I do with my dragon age boys so theres a lot less of them on here. I should do a sketch dump

I'm planning on doing that build-a-rook template thats been going around the dragon age tags sometime soon but I can summarize him here for now.

Ithelanas is a dalish OC of mine I made to romance my lavellan inquisitor bc I was sad at the lack of dalish ROs. Eventually he developed beyond just being the inquisitor's boyfriend and now I'm planning on trying to make him be my Rook. Not sure that will work out lore wise, he's full of crazy self indulgent headcanons, so if theyre too specific with the backstories I'll probably make a different character for it.

Regardless, my Rook is gonna be a Dalish Veil Jumper and I'm torn between Bellara and Davrin for first romance!

[thesillyvivi]

i made a post asking if u guys would like my oc being a failed eva/trish thingy (would it be eva or trish i still dont know) and i think yall did and i did say if enough people liked it i would make a post going a bit more into it. yeah. something like that. anyway this is thay post

be warned this is one of the few times ive decided to write out oc lore n stuaff so it migjt be a little sloppy. a bit bad. im not a professional at this sort of thing. we ball

ok yap time

so the whole idea was that Liniyal (the dmc oc in question) was like. a proto trish i guess u could say???? that eventually escapes mallet island and tries to live a normal life. or as normal as she can all things considered

how she escapes i havent really figured out yet. i think during the collapse would make tje most sene but thats as far as that goes. i heard that trish and dante got there by boat so maybe she made her own little makeshift boat and skedaddled??? who knows. but she Gets Out

the only reason why mundus even keeps her long enough that she manages to escape is that he wanted to punish her failure (even if technically he was the one that failed) by keeping her locked up and showing her what she couldve been and what she couldve done when he finally creates the perfect one aka trish. its like when a parent says "you should/could be more like (person)" but way worse if that makes sense

so then dmc1 happens and all the while liniyal is like somewhere just kinda trapped and then mundus is defeated and shes able to be set free since his magic stuff was beung used to keep her locked up and since hes like gone? probably? it would kinda just disappear. you know??.????

so yada yada she escapes and arrives to main land and the immediate first thing she wants to do is remove or cover anything that reminds her of what she is. basically starting a new life or at least trying to

its like a V situation where she has to go around stealing stuff and hunting demons 4 food (since i think he does that in vov) at first she probably has the mosy horrendous fashion taste but for like 95% of her life she WAS naked so u cant blame her too much. she does get better eventually i hopr

ive yet to decide whether or not i want to give her a buddy who like helps her w everythinf because while i do think it would be nice idk if id want to make it a canon character and if not that would mean id have to make up a whole new character and i just Dont Know how to go about that. maybe i can jusg say there was some guy and you can put your own interpetations on em if u wanted

also still thinkimg about when she would actually appear in "canon" either during dmc4 or dmc5. not sure when in dmc4 but for 5 i thought about maybe her firsy appearence would be in the far background when nero is fightinf (checks notes) artemis kinda like how in the one dmc4 cutscene you can see dante just chilling while neros kicking ass

and then her like meeting appearence if that also makes sense would be when V or nero come across a later boss (still on surface or when v is in the queen empusa area) and she gets like whacked so one of em decides they gotta like help??? and soon enough she'll be bavk on her feet and syart fighting alongside em and be like a companion. dont know where to go after that though

i 100% do think that if she were to ever meet trish it would be AWKWARD. even if trish wouldnt know her (another thing i havent decided on. that comes up a lot in here) she would know trish and just feel all weird aroun her because. You Know

and i think? thats all i can think off the top of my head????? it is fsirly late when im writing this so idk i might be too tired to remember anything else that would be important

i hope this isnt a let down like i said im not very good this sort of thing. at some point i think im gonna make a ref that has liniyal, trish, and eva to likr compare them and see how liniyal was considered a failure. and thrn also her weapon and yada yada

if anyone has any suggestions or questions or corrections u wanna make feel free to reblog or senf me an ask i am open to Everything

okauy. goodnight

[n0bluev]

Somehow, im inspired to write that 'revision fic'. === (EDIT : u can skip but heres another snippet for u (3 separate bits that fit together nicely, actually haha) cuz hihi. THE AU: As i said, its a failed "3"rd regression context, where yjh is now in his "4"th round. The last memory he has of kdj is him dying, and to make things worse "In this round, that guy doesn't exist." is a thing, so yjh freaks out a bit but hes totally normal about this whole ordeal & the fact that he doesnt even remembers kdj's face now. Wdym! Hes fiiiiiine!

sorry lol back to the actual post : (,hope u enjoyed that little treat tho^^)) ===

!!THAT [Somehow, im inspired to write [...]] HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE!!. I always like. do an outline for the overall story and vibe, then flesh out the start or something and cook up a little 500 (probably unsatisfying) words for fun kind of as a bonus. Keep it mostly for my private enjoyment and move on before the story comes to life. And that's okay... Yes, it would be cooler to actually write the AU ideas i get in novel or comic form instead of having them stay at just the 'sketch' & 'idea/brainstorm' phase before i get another idea and leave them to dust up in the pile,,

But yeah, its okay.

In the few years since ive started getting ideas for more elaborate aus/fics, ive noticed that my ideas improved with time. (no shit, i know, but it makes me happy! i grew up!!! i can see it.) My planning methods are better too. So all of that unfinished or abandoned stuff is not at all useless work in my eyes. And who knows, maybe one day i'll bring them back.

--> as a plus, all my fandom brainrot experiences even get transferred into my OC stuff, and frl whenever i read my notes these days (or listen to my voice memos lol) and im just like "HOW DID I THINK OF THIS WOW" or "WHEN DID I PUT THIS LIKE THIS? IT WORKS!" (not to brag or anything but my oc lore goes hard ☝️)

BUT. NOW THIS IS UNEXPECTED.

I DID NO PLANNING. I just started writing for orv and its. Lowkey, good ???? Dont get me wrong i only have 1.5k right now and there are clear holes i have to fill and stuff but... CLEAR HOLES! CLEAR HOLES. Sure Im used to being like "something of the sort should go there..." BUT THIS TIME ITS "THIS SHOULD GO THERE, ILL WRITE IT LATER BUT THE IMAGE IS IN MY MIND, CLEAR AS WATER, AND ONCE I START PUTTING IT ON THE PAGE ISTG THOSE WORDS WILL STREAM OUT OF MY FINGERS AS IF IT WAS A NORMAL OCCURENCE FOR ME" ,,- !??? Yo!

Anyways. Point is that somehow theres interesting stuff going on in my gg doc and the more i write the more i know where i want to go, so that's cool, i feel all powerfull for once

idk if that ease is going to stay once im done with the first scenes (ughh!!! theres so much potential!!!!!!!!) but hopefully yes. either way ill probably post it so im not baiting yall with a "um actually im writing smt rn --- *never shares with the class*" --- either 1) things go well and i write a "real fic" (!? wtf that wasnt my plan!) --- or 2) i only post the finished version of what i have now (expect around 5k? (i have no idea actually)) and we wait together to see if i pick up the idea again haha. (i do wish to write it tho! im not a 'writer' writer but i want to be one, u get me?)

! thank u see u byebye

[nixierain]

Alright poll time I will hopefully remember and find

Woah I havent showed you much of these, but a recap anyway about the and just an intro ig under the cut if you wanna learn more, feel free to ask questions too!!

DoveTech/LividMetals: Rival companies taking place in California, both majoring in robotics and experimentation. Lots of lore. Makn inspirations: Qualia Automata (Team 6x111) and FNAF. Yall should know about the Fritz family by now, I also got an rp blog for this at @dovetechandlividmetals

Bromind Deities: Bromind is one of my main worlds (2nd newest world as well), the deities were created by the Goddess light and split into two sections; The Astral deities and the Terestrial Deities. The Astrals being; Neptune, Void and Nebula and the Terestrials being; Myca and Fawn (theyre gay). They control over different things. And theres a hierarchy ofc!

Bromind False deities: This plot focuses on Siri (the False deity of the stars) and when she was rejected by Light for Nebula. Then Siri gets vengeful and with Voids help she makes a new hierarchy

Fumbling: Follows Liam and Mason's journey through Harkton Boarding highschool, and being gay they find friends with; Dereck (Drake), Dixie, River, Reef, Kayla and Addicus. Though since middle school our two mc's have been bullied by Mark and his friends. Though some things happen and everything goes askew, throwing thier whole life off balance. This is my gay story, and L and M were my first Gay characters (shocking aint it) I made them in 7th grade

Deadbeat Outlaws (DBO): This story follows two trouble makers, Zach and Craz. The lore has changed a LOT since when I first made it, though I kept the name. Its not fully completed and I don't know how much I want to change so I dont have much to put here

Hellena stuff: this has a LOT of lore and came even before Dragonopolis, like I grew up with this world cause its my lego world that got shaped into this. So the story would be one of many that are with the three heros, Nate, Flower and Nightshade. Nate and Flower have also been tied to DoveTech. But this would focus on their hecktic life of being hero's and going insane to the point where one goes evil and takes over, forcing the other two to have to save the lives, and a lot more!

11:11: Follows the story of a 14 year old girl with ADHD who wishes to not be bored one morning while she eats breakfast, this wish comes true and she gets transported to Trifullium and meets Fenn, the two have to work together to get Mayabelle (the girl) home, eventually falling in love in the process.

Everdollskin: my ragdoll world thing! And my most recent world I've built. Unsure of what part you want me to focus on, but itd probably be either Fargo and Evendor's story and Evan and Bens! Full lf twists and turns and of course Ragdolls and horrors, tears and all!

Apollo: Sooooo, Apollo is one of my newest Oc's, hes got a bunch of lore already though. So he's one of my Yandere's. I know he looks gay (people are arguing with me when I say hes "straight" sl we made a compramise and said he only likes one oerson and that happens to be a girl, and also ig hes bi) But he meets Mae and falls totally head over heels for her, but she... HATES him. Now join him in stalking his new found obsession and killing off anyone she dates!

[yumiiyummech]

kay guys... would any of yall want me to write an A03 story about the WENDY pov of the entire game story including her lore and the post game aftermath? obviously its going to take a long time so I'd probably do scheduled days to post a chapter or something but....

umm for those who have never seen my content at all, I made an OMORI OC; WENDY! My entire tumblr page is basically just her if u wanna check it out. I've mainly only drawn up until recently. Just wondering if I should write about her :D

[crosse-is-at-bb]

IT'S YA BOY

uhhhh hi. im chris but i go by crosse. chris is only for if you're mad at me lol. christopher if you hate me ig.

my dad said maintaining a social media acct like this would be good for like practice without anybody important really seeing this so i can't fuck up my reputation so. here we are lol. also my sister might show up here sometimes idk. i will be typing in pink.

uhhhh as for like. me. im crosse, you alr know that. i use he/him. born and raised in castelia.

GO METS!!!!!!!!!!

i go to blueberry academy, its my last year of high school, probably going there for uni too. i like dragon types too. goom :) pokemon battling is fun thats why i go to the pokemon battling school who woulda thought. i also think that uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yall should stop being weird about kids with trauma on here. i have pokemon

Nori \ Dragalge \ F

Argent \ Archaludon \ M

Turbo \ Dragapult \ F

Rockit \ Hydrapple \ M

Hookfang \ Roaring Moon \ M

Deedee \ Hydreigon \ F

i also have a beautiful daughter with my two friends also trouble trio 4 life

//OOC BELOW, PLEASE READ IT BEFORE INTERACTING!

OOC Section

I like and follow from @aspens-lab!

Crosse is 18 years old and mod is a minor. Behave accordingly.

While Crosse is a newer OC, he did originate in a discord RP, and has some relationships and lore from there. This includes a Drayton without a Rotumblr blog. Just something to be kept in mind.

I've got a canon I'm working with, so I may ignore an ask or an interaction if it goes against it strongly.

High stakes won't be a huuuuuge thing on here, I don't see Crosse explicitly talking about his past, or more specifically The Malaria Horrors, but he may refer to them. Things that are explicitly high stakes will be tagged accordingly.

Tags

I can't guarantee that I'll be perfect with these, but I will be trying to tag things according to the below key.

#crosse reblogs ⇌ in-character reblogs

#crosse talks ⇌ in-character posts

#crosse replies ⇌ asks responded to in-character

#ft. malaria ⇌ malaria talking on this blog

#the malaria archives ⇌ malaria specific high stakes Posts about specific Pokemon will be tagged as "#[pokemon name] posting". For example, if Crosse makes a post specifically about his Roaring Moon, Hookfang, it will be tagged "#hookfang posting".

[prosaic-bun]

When does a fox bloom?

Pairing: Ayato x Kitsune Mc x Thoma

Novella

Genre: Fluff - Angst - Introspective - lore oriented

Author Note: At this point I had to finish this chapter or the chapter would have finished me. So. Much. Dialogues. It really made me doubt if I, myself, know what dialogues are. Also I had a fever a week ago and somehow I made some spicy lemon grade smut (Ayato x Male reader x Thoma) and I was wondering if it would be apropos to make it a stand alone more or less connecting to this fic. I wrote it using Y/N instead of using my OC Naoya and I'm unsure what yall would prefer between the two. You can tell me via direct messages, asks or the reaction bubble on this post - doing so will grant the VIP access and I might be more inclined to take recommandations (I'm half serious at this point, but don't be scare to reach out, constructive criticism are always welcome).

Trigger Warning: Angst.

Character Profile - Prologue - Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 (currently reading) - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7

--------------------

Chapter 5

6.9k words

Thoma and Naoya were on their way back after investigating an adventurer campsite at the very North West of Yashiori island - where the tip of Orobashi’s tail pointed out of the water. They found some trinkets and artifacts under the tent, but more importantly some ragged notes with plans depicting a lower level to the above-water ruins of Fort Mumei. This time, Naoya had clearly felt an ancient energy emanating from within the stone structures. Maybe there was more to the location than meets the eye.

«So yeah, looking at Fort Mumei still felt eerie, but I’m pretty sure there is something more than just that feeling. Combined with the fact that I fainted the first time we went there, it’s safe to assume we will need to go back and investigate the site more thoroughly.» Naoya commented.

«There is really something about that place.» Thoma agreed.

«After all, it’s not called Fort Mumei for nothing; if we take into account that its name translates to Fort of ignorance it almost taunts us. Anyway having you by my side this time around was really pleasant. All week I’ve been investigating that Jakotsu Mine so I’m glad we were able to visit a place where the sky is visible letting the sun rays reach our skin.» Naoya stated.

«Yes, it also felt good to spend time outside after being shut in for so long. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to come with you when you explored Jakotsu mine. By the way, do we know why Fort Mumei was built initially?

«Don’t apologize for the time you needed to recover from your illness, Thoma-chi. To answer your question, I read in the Narukami Shrines archives that long ago it was possible to cross all of Inazuma on foot. Something about the level of the water and a long distance highway that made for impressive infrastructures. The author of the documents posited that the ruins of Araumi and Fort Mumei are examples of such a nationwide network.»

«So it would have been possible to go on vacation to Watatsumi island by foot?» Thoma asked, seemingly excited at the possibilities it would entail.

«Hum, I don’t think it was possible since the roads must have predated the creation of the island of Watatsumi.» Naoya answered.

«So no vacation without taking a damn boat, uh.» Thoma summarized with a smidge of dejection as he looked at the maple leaves over him signaling that they would soon reach their base.

«No, but we can still go on vacation In Watatsumi with a bigger, safer boat! Didn’t you mention a crew that made it past the Thunderstorm barrier of the Sakoku Decree? We should ask them to take us. Well only if you want.»

«Captain Beidou and the fleet of the Crux are amazing! Maybe they are a good starting point. However we shouldn’t restrict ourselves to only Inazuma! They could bring us to Dornman port in Mondstadt and then I could show you around.» Thoma got more and more enthusiastic at the thought of visiting his home nation accompanied by the kitsune.

«I would like that…» Naoya mustered tentatively, embarrassed of how gushy he felt at the idea of some tacit long term plan he would share with the housekeeper.

However, the emotion was short-lived as their home base came into view. It wasn’t the building that made a glower appear on the kitsune’s face, it was the result of noticing a certain slender form right beside the old abandoned house.

Naoya swiftly changed his course and half shouted to Thoma: «I’m just going to freshen up by the river and I’ll meet you back at the house. It will take me 5 minutes, top.»

Thoma didn’t have an opportunity to answer anything before Naoya was out of earreach, long strides hastily bringing him in the opposite direction of the housekeeper’s position. Turning his back on the Kitsune, Thoma then noticed that Ayato was waiting for him. The housekeeper picked up some speed and followed the trail until he could greet him.

After exchanging formalities and enquiring about their respective last few days, Ayato stated he did come back, but only to end the expedition and bring everyone back to Narukami island. Although he understood where Ayato was coming from, Thoma felt the decision wasn’t made impartially.

«Ayato-san, I’m just telling you that it’s a bit unfair and that he probably won’t like you to come back here just to tell us the expedition is over. There is no reason for you to act that way without discussing the issue first.» 

«Thoma, why are you taking his side? We already completed the ⅔ of this expedition and since you didn’t make any progress, we are cancelling the rest of the expedition. That’s all there is to it.»

«How about you cut some slack to Thoma and instead tell me why you made such an arbitrary decision?» Naoya’s voice was heard as soon as he opened the door, making a gust of wind rush inside. The kitsune knew storming in wasn’t his best course of action, but the tension that lingered after Ayato left for Narukami made it easy to overreact.

«Listening behind closed doors to get the right timing before making an entrance? No ‘Hello’ or ‘How have you been?’ you prefer jumping right into it. Always so dramatic Naoya.» Ayato sneered down at the kitsune.

«Sure that’s your point of view. Thoma you can tell him why we won’t be leaving if I'm too dramatic for Ayato’s taste.» Naoya smuggly taunted back, crossing his arms on his chest with an air of defiance.

Before Thoma was able to utter a single word, Ayato raised his voice with an unexpected vehemence. «Don’t bring him into that.»

«Why? Because you think he wouldn’t agree with you?» Naoya provoked some more.

«Stop trying to get in between him and me, you are just a hindrance to our work relationship.»

«Oh a ‘work relationship’, that is so ludicrous. You couldn’t even say friendship?» Naoya snapped back, rolling his eyes.

«Just say it. You tried to get close with Thoma only to get at me.»

«I think Thoma is a great companion and I would like to know him better. On the other hand, I'm not sure how I feel about you wanting to control his life and thinking people would only want to forge a bond with him to get at you, mister Head of the Kamisato clan. That is some bullshit right here.»

«You both know I'm just beside you, right?» Thoma tried to intervene, growing more and more exasperated with their shenanigans, especially since they didn’t mind using him to get at each other.

«Control his life? I'm just worried for him, you never spoke to him at any of the events you attended since you were back and I know you can be so insincere and deceiving when you want it. What if you suddenly decide that you don't want to talk with him for 3 years and act like strangers after that?»

«How dare you! Of course mister Kamisato, the oh so important Yashiro Commissioner, expects people to stay just as they are and keep their role in his pretty little life, because it is so much more important than anything else. What if you don't have your dose of charming personnel from Mondstat every day? Will you throw a hissy fit?»

«You have some nerves to patronize me like that. In opposition to your distasteful self-indulgent behaviours, I know Thoma would never leave without any last words. I can put my trust in him.»

«Stop putting so much pressure on him. That’s unbelievable. He is not there for your convenience. However, your figure of speech reveals a lot about your inner desires. Naughty Ayato thinks about "putting in" and "thrusting" when it comes to his personal staff. Why don't you say you just want to fuck him already.»

«You bastard.» Ayato grunted at half-voice, the sound escaping his throat resembling more the threatening sound of a torrent than his usual composed tone.

«Maybe I am a bastard; I was raised by the shrine maidens and never knew my parents. How does it make you feel that such a low born person is in your presence.»

«You are so deranged, all that meditation messed up your brain. You always find a way to cross the line when it comes to me.»

«ENOUGH. That's all you've done during this trip. Making things about me when in reality you are still two teenagers that aren't fucking able to communicate with each other or deal with their own emotions.»

Ayato turned around and looked in disbelief at Thoma. Even though the housekeeper doesn’t raise his voice often, he can project an incredible assertive aura.

«What is it, Ayato? You can't stand when something doesn't go like you planned? Close your gaping mouth and get over yourself.» Naoya nagged from behind Thoma, even pulling his tongue at Ayato adding another layer of pettiness.

«Oh and don't even start Naoya. Did you think you could have the milk, the butter in addition to fucking the milkman? You think you can act as you did just now and it will bear no consequences whatsoever? And back then, you left for Liyue and expected that everybody in Inazuma would hold their breath until you got back. Guess what? Ayato is the Head of the Yashiro Commission and he has a successful life because he is good at it and made many sacrifices along the way.» Thoma paused, catching his breath and glared down at the other two men as if he was their parent scolding them.

«The lack of respect you two just exhibited is not warranted. The way you objectified me isn’t something you do to someone you care about. I can't deal with your bad vibes anymore. Don’t wait for me, and focus on listening to each other.» Thoma exclaimed before storming off.

As the door slammed shut, Naoya just stood there, head lowered looking at the ground. The kitsune felt really small, he didn’t exactly know how to name the emotions he was feeling but shame had to be part of them. Did it really take Thoma for him to catch up on how he was acting, wasn’t he able to catch himself before going too far?

«Oh so now you're silent. I wish it happened sooner so it wouldn’t have come to this.» Ayato stated bitterly.

«Shut up. Stop blaming everything on me. We were both arguing if I remember correctly.» Naoya retorted in a more even tone than before.

«Tsk.» A simple click of tongue on Ayato’s part was enough to reignite the embers of the kitsune’s emotions.

Naoya abruptly turned around, closing the distance between them and grabbed Ayato’s collar. The kitsune raised his lowered head to meet with Ayato’s eyes. In the closeness of their position, Ayato was shocked to see some tears rolling down the kitsune’s cheek. Usually the latter would have hidden them at all cost; in spite of his pride he unveiled them, showcasing the vulnerability of the moment.  «What do you want from me?» The glint in Naoya’s eyes let out more hurt than anger at this point.

Ayato moved back instinctively in an attempt to free himself from the kitsune’s hold. «Don’t touch me.»

«Just answer me. What do you want now? Do you want to have the last word or what? Be my guest, just say something.» At each sentence spilling out of Naoya’s mouth he shaked his former best friend back and forth like a child would shale a rag doll.

«Unhand me and control yourself.» Ayato spitted out before struggling against the Kitsune’s hold. As his previous attempts to free himself didn’t succeed, Ayato firmly pushed against Naoya’s chest which resulted in Naoya losing his balance and toggling backwards, while still bringing Ayato into his fall.

They heavily crashed on the wooden floor, Ayato hastily raised himself partly on his arm, Naoya trapped under him. They were close, Ayato could see many thoughts stir inside of the kitsune’s eyes.

«Let me go.» Naoya said without conviction.

«You asked me what I want from you. Just tell me how you feel and what you think, like before.» Ayato said as he maintained eye contact with the other. The fact he was resting against the kitsune also meant their bodies were the closest they had been in years, but nothing felt familiar at first. Ayato didn’t want to be this close, however it was an unexpected opportune way to pin his former best friend in place. It was uncomfortable, Naoya’s breathing was annoying, he didn’t know where to put his long limbs or where to land his stare other than looking at Naoya under him. Their position galled Ayato’s skin, but what irritated him the most was that he liked being able to touch the other after so much time. A proof the kitsune was tangible and not a figment of his imagination. The commissioner had replayed many of their last moments in his head in search of some details that would explain why his friend left like he did. They never said goodbye and neither did they exchange greetings when Naoya made it back to Narukami. So in a way, it was as if Naoya never stopped to be a quiet and acrimonious contemplation. And so it felt weird this was the first time their bodies were so close after all these years. 

«I don’t want to. What’s the point if we haven’t reconnected thus far? It’s not like before.» Naoya answered while trying to look indiferent.

«You idiot, that’s the sunk cost fallacy. It’s still worth it. Just talk to me.» Ayato fired back.

Ayato had managed to earn a snicker out of Naoya. «Why though, didn’t I make you mad enough?»

«I might be mad, but I still care about you.»

Naoya looked up at Ayato and wondered if it was too late to make amends. «Are you sure? I think you prefer the version of me you have in your head. You were never satisfied with the real me.» Naoya attempted to jerk himself out of Ayato’s grasp but Ayato tightened his hold.

«Why are you so sure I can’t care about who you truly are.»

Naoya turned his head to look at the ceiling, remaining silent. The kitsune frowned and his ears flattened on his head. Ayato couldn’t tell what he was thinking but it seems his former best friend was reluctant to talk about their issues.

«How about I let you go before we have this conversation? But you can’t run away.» Ayato pleaded. Naoya nodded back, still looking somewhere slightly over the other. Ayato pushed himself to the side and freed the kitsune. Naoya raised himself on his elbows and retreated to the closest wall to put his back against the cold rugged surface.

«Nao-rin, tell me something, at least one. Stop trying to keep everything bottled up.»

Naoya twitched at the nickname and exhaled excessively. Ayato decided to remain seated a few meters away from the kitsune, regaining some patience after the heated argument. Naoya finally gave in and decided to try communicating his feelings. He had to be careful though, if he was going to do it, he needed to leave the pettiness behind.

«Let’s do this. I’m aware I have my own insecurities that I project onto you, but do I really have to be perfect all the time? I acknowledge them and work on them. Maybe now isn't the best moment to be worried about my self worth» Naoya began, unsure if he was petty or openning up.

«No. You don’t have to be perfect all the time, everyone has things they struggle with.»

«You know if we were better at communicating we wouldn’t have hurt Thoma in the crossfire.»

«I understand you want me to take part of the blame for not being able to communicate clearly. Correct?» Ayato questioned.

«No. Well, maybe. I just wanted to say it out loud.»

«I can’t object to this statement. However, let's deal with our problems and then we'll talk with Thoma.»

«I guess it’s now or never. If we don’t try to air our dirty laundry, I might not be able to sleep tonight anyway.» Naoya conceded.

Ayato smiled because of the mental gymnastics his former best friend was doing in order to be able to open up about his feelings. «I can start if it makes it easier. When it comes to you, I felt betrayed and I am resentful ever since you burned bridges with me. I don’t think I deserved this silent treatment. I was never able to figure out why you would leave like this without telling me. Did you do this to get back at me for hurting you in some way, or was our friendship meaningless to you.»

Naoya winced at the words, but instead of getting defensive, he accepted them and reflected on the feeling his former best friend tried to share with him. «During that time period I felt inadequate and lost. Inazuma wasn’t helping me understand what path I wanted to take.»

«But how does that relate to me? Why did I deserve for you to leave without saying anything.»

«I was trying to do what would be best for everyone.»

«Naoya I needed you. I lost you and then I lost my parents and everything was changing so fast. I didn’t know who my friends or enemies were.» Ayato explained, sorrow making his voice tremble a little. «People tried to destroy the Kamisato clan, my sister and I included and I had to hear from Toda (the shrine maiden acting as liaison between the Yashiro Commission and the Grand Narukami Shrine) that you had departed for Liyue.»

«I’m sorry for your loss. I guess I never took the opportunity to tell you, but I truly am. You shouldn’t have to live through that. Your parents were good people.» Naoya paused, wondering how to clearly explain how things were back then. «Aside from dealing with my inner struggle, I needed to understand our relationship better, I - I wanted to know if I was the person you described or if you just put a label on me so I could fit in your life.» Naoya searched for his words. «The timing wasn’t the best. At first I felt that I wasn’t enough to support you. I saw your righteous path before you and I got scared. Even with meditation I wasn’t able to be honest with myself, it seems like I was never thinking clearly. Were you asking too much of me? Were you taking advantage of me? I never had aspirations to gain influence, quite the opposite I wanted to work outside the system.» Naoya paused to breathe in. «Ayato, back then I didn’t have the answer, but now I can see I felt inadequate and at the same time you didn’t realize the expectations you had put on me. At some point I didn’t know if you were trying to change me and I know now it seemed so absurd. In a way I felt like some toy you had, not even my own person. And it hurt because I wanted to be seen and understood not just listened to.»

«But I didn't ask for you to be perfect, you didn’t have to be the answer to everything. I just wanted us to be there and stand together.»

Naoya sadly smiled. «I understand, but back then would you have wanted us to stand together even if it was in the dark? Were you ready to halt your projects for me? You never asked me to be perfect, but you never asked me to not be. With your actions, my inability to recognize I was putting tremendous pressure on myself, the shrine maidens that were giving me anxiety and the Bakufu and their flawed vision of inazuman people, I didn’t know who I was and if I was good enough. I felt like a liability and I was angry at you for it.»

Ayato took the words in. At first he was going to flatly negate everything, but thinking back about their past relationship he realized he could see what the kitsune meant. Ayato was sure of him and let the kitsune follow him behind. However, always following someone and trusting them could be difficult.

Naoya’s flow of words started once more and interrupted Ayato’s chain of thoughts. «Right now I feel guilty, and I feel so bad for not being able to be there at the time, but I also remember how hard it was for me to just do everyday tasks and having to trust the process. Maybe I should have stayed, maybe I made the right choice leaving, I honestly can’t tell.» The Kitsune let the words float in the air before concluding. «If i would do it again, I would take the time to tell you before leaving and actually send you the letters i wrote to you while abroad.» «Wait, you wrote me letters?» Ayato asked, skeptical. «What were they about?» Naoya smiled. «I did, the stack of letters was pretty impressive at some point. I wrote about me, how I felt, how I was striving for balance, how my master was such a good person, but oh so stern. She helped me in many ways and after a short while I was in a much better state. I wrote letters explaining myself and giving you cues on how to understand me. I also wrote about how I missed you.» The kitsune finished not bothering to hide those particular details. «I’m glad you were able to find someone who could bring you that kind of support. I wished you would have sent those letters… Earlier you said that you had to reevaluate our relationship. What was that about, why was your mind clouded when it came to me?» «Ayato, why are you such a good listener that you didn’t miss any details.» Naoya sighed. «Did you know you were the first kid my age I met? Of course we ended up making many friends when we met in the abandoned temple right in front of Mount Yougou. Before that, I was only with shrine maidens and Yae. They didn’t feel exactly like a family, but they were there for me. I didn’t get really close with Yae until I was older. They didn’t completely see me for who i was yet, they cared for me.»

Naoya was now lost in thoughts, but felt somewhat lighter after explaining everything so he kept going. «Regardless of what happened at the shrine, down the mountain a little adventurous and troublesome boy made me realize I missed the warmth of someone who looked forward to spending time with me. You were my best friend, my rival and an equal, someone who was able to follow me with my thoughts. You challenged me, showed me you cared for me, you talked, listened, felt, and even made plans about the future. It was scary, but it was also intoxicating to be with you. And then I had the thought it wasn’t real, it couldn’t be. I convinced myself you had an ulterior motive.» Naoya looked directly at Ayato and continued. «You represented so many things for me, but at some point it got confusing and I wanted to understand myself better first. And you know I meditate when I feel stuck.» The eldest Kamisato sibling let the kitsune articulate his thoughts, respectful yet eager. «Ayato, I-, I wanted to understand our relationship because my feelings got in the way of me thinking clearly. I hated that I didn’t know myself while you would be so whole and intact. Untouched and above the water while I was drowning in darkness. I don’t know, I’m sorry.» «Why are you apologizing?» Ayato asked. «I read once in old writings that laws regarding spiritual awakening stipulate one shouldn’t love someone in particular and regard humanity as all deserving of the same love, but in a way that love would also mean no earthly attachment-» Naoya stated in a monotone voice. «Naoya, you are stalling. I want to know what YOU think of me.» «Back then or now?» «Now.» «Those feelings don't scare me like they used to, but i think they are part of the reason I’m not able to properly interact with you. It got so complicated so fast and those feelings mostly hurt because I felt like I didn’t have the right to have them. Back then I missed the window opportunity to say my goodbyes and choose not to taint our memories. I guess writing those letters also helped me reach a certain closure.»

«That doesn’t answer my question, but maybe your letter will. May I read those letters when we get back?» Ayato asked with a sly smile.

«There is no chance of that happening.» Naoya blurted out with his ears quivering.

«Come on. You know I always liked your prose.»

«Stop it. Now it’s your turn to tell me how you feel.» Naoya asked, trying to get out of the tight spot he was in. He wasn’t about to confess a childhood crush after having a screaming match with the other person involved.

«I understand better now. The situation was complicated and we weren’t equipped to deal with it. I can see how my attitude made it seem like I was self absorbed, but truly it couldn’t be further from the truth. I would prefer if today was the last day of us not communicating properly and from tomorrow on, we won’t hide anything anymore. Is that something we can do?» Ayato established.

«That’s a given.» Naoya agreed.

«Great. Now tell me if those feelings of yours included love or not.» Ayato went in, taking no hostages.

Naoya jumped at the directness of the question and looked everywhere around them, fidgeting in place while his mind went blank. Of course Ayato would put him on the spot like that.

«Stop teasing me. We haven’t talked in years.» Naoya panicked.

«We are talking now. And you wrote me letters.»

«It’s not the same.»

«What kind of conversation would you like to hold?»

«It’s not that, I-. We were fighting minutes ago.»

«May I kiss you.» Ayato asked softly. The kitsune’s body stifled, but the man’s words still brought Naoya's attention back to Ayato’s face. For a long time Naoya studied Ayato’s facial expression. Was he serious? That had to be the most unexpected course of action possible, which he didn’t anticipate.

«No. You aren’t thinking clearly.» «But you still have feelings for me right? You talked like you still loved me. And I've loved you all this time, so what’s wrong? Never during the time we were apart did my negative thoughts outweigh the positive thoughts I harbored for you. I’ve wanted to do it for so long, and it was even harder during this expedition, but we weren’t able to understand each other. You can see this kiss as the promise of a new beginning without erasing what led us here.» Naoya couldn’t understand how he had not self combust yet. «Not like this and not now. If you still feel like kissing me in a week, then maybe we may consider it. You can’t just expect me to be ok with a 180 like that.» «Deal. Now allow me to give you a welcome back hug at least.» Ayato stood up and opened his arms.

«Welcome back from where? Your outing in Narukami?» «Hey, I had important things to do with the Shumatsuban. You were too distant for my taste. I felt like you never returned from liyue and I was still waiting for you to come back into my life.» Ayato explained. Naoya stood up as well and looked Ayato in the eyes before muttering a promise of his own. «I will work on what we have together and I won’t leave unless of some unforeseeable circumstances. If it was the case I commit myself to tell you 48 hours prior.»

«You better or it’s open season.» Ayato retorted, pulling Naoya against him tightly. Maybe this closeness was more familiar compared to the one of moments ago. Now they had explained themselves and there weren't any interferences left.

«I’m sorry for not being able to be here when you needed me and not coming to see you sooner.» Naoya apologized.

«I’m sorry that I wasn’t attentive to your needs and took you for granted.» Ayato answered.

After a moment of silence Naoya spoke again. «There is one last thing I need to tell you, but it can wait and I would prefer it if we waited for Thoma.»

****

The abandoned house was quiet. Ayato was crouched down over the table and had been asleep for some time now. Naoya was seated on the floor next to the door - pretty much where he was when he talked with Ayato, still thinking about the conversation they had. More importantly he was getting worried Thoma hadn’t come back yet. Maybe he should go see the amiable Kairagi next door to inquire if he had seen him.

Almost as if on cue, the kitsune heard regular footsteps in the distance getting closer and closer. Naoya straightened up and opened the door right away, his haste resulted in Ayato startling awake.

«Oh, you are awake.» Thoma commented plainly.

«I was getting worried, but wanted to give you some space.» Naoya explained, clasping his hands as he braced for Thoma’s possible anger. Ayato peaked from behind the kitsune’s shoulder.

«You didn’t have to worry I was with stray dogs from Higi Village and took them to the river. Did you sort things out?» Thoma asked, lassitude apparent in his tone.

«We-we did!» Naoya answered and turned around to look at Ayato who was nodding his head.

«Good.» Thoma said as he came face to face with Naoya. «Can you move from the doorway, I’d like to go to bed.»

Naoya didn’t know how to react, but complied and moved to the side to allow the venetian blonde to enter the abandoned house.

Thoma made a few steps before hearing a voice behind his back. «Thoma-chi, I’m so sorry. I apologize for what I said earlier. You didn’t deserve that.» Turning around he saw the kitsune kneeling down with his forehead touching the floor. Ayato took notice and was quick to bow in the same way. «We really appreciate you and we are sorry you had to be in the middle of us this whole time.» The commissioner added.

«Stand up. Both of you.» Thoma muttered.

Naoya and Ayato obliged, not knowing what to expect. Thoma menacingly walked toward them and stopped at arm length. He raised his hand and both men closed their eyes waiting for the impact. Thoma brought up his hand perpendicularly and proceeded to chop their heads with a light movement, nothing to hurt them.

«Seems like you did a lot of thinking. I’m glad to hear everything resolved itself.» Thoma said with a sweet smile only he could pull off. «Now let’s get to bed, shall we.»

****

In the early hours of morning, thunder and wind worked in concert to make sure that any sleep the three men could have wouldn’t be of top grade quality. After being woken up one two many times, the trio settled for an early breakfast prepared by Ayao and Naoya who still felt a little guilty for letting their quarrel get to Thoma. The latter enjoyed the act of kindness and was grateful to see his two boys working together for once. The menu consisted of some grilled lavender melons, omelette rice and some dango milk Ayato had brought back with him yesterday.

After most of their plates were emptied, Naoya decided to tackle the last thing on his list of things he wanted to resolve with the boys. 

«So.» Naoya hesitated, breaking the silence. «There is one last thing we kinda need to talk about.»

«Yes Naoya, we can finish the expedition like you wished, but don’t be smug about it.» Ayato stated before taking a long sip of dango milk; it even seemed like he was looking for shelter into his cup at the idea of another confrontation.

«Well that’s great but I meant to talk about… err the reason why you left in a hurry, Ayato and that you worried a lot Thoma. Let’s say I want to talk about my condition.» Naoya cautiously explained.

«Is it about the reason why you fainted during our expeditions?» Thoma enquired.

«Yeah. Naoya let out breathily, further indicating he really didn’t know where to go with this conversation.

«Don’t worry Nao-rin, take your time. And in case you are worried, we won’t be mad. The last few weeks didn’t give you a lot of options to open up.» »Thoma stated, taking charge of the dialogue to help the other.

«Thank you. Hum. I don’t know where to start.» Naoya confessed.

«Start with the beginning.» Thoma answered, trying to lighten the mood.

«Or maybe you could tell a story like you used to do when we were younger.» Ayato offered. «Naoya always made up stories akin to light novels when he wanted to talk about something personal, while not knowing how to.» The light blue-haired man specified for Thoma.

«I can see Guuji Yae’s influence.» Thoma chuckled and smiled at the kitsune to encourage him.

«Right.» Naoya inhaled and the pieces of the story were coming to him. « Long ago there was a little fox that wanted to make his clan very proud of him. When the matriarch asked for him to better his spiritual connection to the Sacred Sakura, the fox obliged and started meditating under its leaves every day. His busy schedule could be overwhelming, but the moments he passed under the tree brought more balance to him. With time, the fox strengthened his connection and his power grew by leaps and bounds making him out to be a great asset for the shrine and his clan.» Naoya paused his memories playing in his head. Thoma reached out and lightly patted the kitsune’s forearm.

«Did the cute little fox happen to have a reddish cordovan fur?» Ayato teased.

«Who said the fox was cute?» Naoya stammered back.

«If I’m not mistaken, the cute fox isn’t so small anymore.» Thoma added.

«Stoooop.» Naoya pleaded, his ears fluttering from the teasing comments.

«I’m sorry, go on.» Ayato apologized.

«You don’t even seem sincere; I’m sure you would tease me again.» Naoya complained. «Anyway, the unknown fox - which you clearly never met, was once more in deep meditation in front of the tree, well it would be more accurate to say with the tree. As he was going deeper and deeper, the fox felt something calling out to him, asking him to follow the roots further into the earth. Naively, the fox continued his descent up until he was hanging from the lowest roots. The feeling was exhilarating, he could feel the whole of Inazuma from there, memories swirling around him. But with his guard lowered the wide-eyed fox was an easy target and he fell prey to the great darkness that lingered after the last calamity. As the fox drowned in the darkness he tried his best to struggle. It took time but after a great deal of effort, he was able to climb back up and ask for help. When the matriarch of the clan heard the plea, she rushed to her protégé's help. Although she would subdue the lingering darkness, she couldn’t make it go away completely.» As he reminisced, Naoya let tears escape down his face alerting the other two men of the kitsune’s ache, who moved closer to hold him. Ayato passed his arm behind the kitsune’s back and hooked his hand on the opposite side, while Thoma opted to cling to the arm he was previously petting.

«From then on, the fox needed to be permanently aware of the darkness that obscured a corner of his mind. After a month or so of recuperating, the fox decided to leave and learn new ways to focus his body and mind. One week later, the kitsune… I sailed the sea and reached liyue in the hope of being able to rebuild myself.»

Naoya chased away his tears and looked to Thoma and saw the worry in his eyes. «Don’t look at me like that, it’s ok.»

«Nao-rin.» Ayato whispered.

«I’m telling you it’s no big deal.» Naoya turned around to see a somber expression painted on his childhood best friend’s face.

«Nao-rin, is that why you felt so inadequate, why you thought you weren’t strong enough to follow me.» Ayato asked while staring at the space in front of him.

Naoya held back his tears which sent trembles through his bodies and nodded with his head affirmatively.

«I’m sorry.» Naoya mustered in between controlled sobs.

«It’s ok we talked about it yesterday. We weren’t equipped to properly talk about those things back then.» Ayato replied. «I’m glad you felt safe enough to tell us now.»

«I know I sounded dramatic, but if I ever spoke of a darkness troubling me, I was in fact referring to the filth and not using some figure of speech.Thank you both for listening.» Naoya acknowledged. «However, the filth isn’t something hard to control anymore, it only creeps up on me when I’m surprised by something like the tatarigami.»

«Are you saying this with the expedition in mind?» Ayato worried.

«Yes. I know it may seem reckless, but I know I can find the Primeval Sakura in Fort Mumei. Whatever that will be waiting for us there doesn’t stand a chance. If I come prepared, you won’t have to worry about me.»

«When do you think you can get ready?» Thoma asked.

«Are you sure you want to do this?» Ayato added.

«Yes, but all this talk about feelings and the lack of sleep got me a bit tired. Even though we woke up not long ago, I feel like napping. I think we all need some sleep actually. After that I give myself until 10 o'clock tomorrow to be standing on those ruines.»

«That can be arranged. Especially the napping part.» Thoma reassured.

As Thoma got up and held out his hand for Naoya to grab it and follow him, Ayato moved out to put their three futons together and gathered the light bedsheet and throw blankets they had with them. In the morning light, Naoya took place in the middle and pulled the cover over him and tossed around to sink in the soft materials already shutting his eyes. Thoma and Ayato suddenly looked like they were having second thoughts; was it really ok to nap together? Was it too soon after everything? Maybe the kitsune would prefer to be alone to rest.

«What are you waiting for? I’ll get cold if I’m napping alone.» Naoya stated, raising himself on his elbows to look up at the other two. His lower eyelids raised up instinctively, highlighting the fact he found their sudden burst of shyness futile.

The two men take place on each side of the kitsune; Thoma settled on his back while Ayato was on his side facing the kitsune's profile. As he felt the sleepiness seap in, Naoya turned on his side to be more comfortable. His change of position brought him closer to the housekeeper, so much so that it prompted Thoma to pull him closer against his side, so the kitsune would rest his head on the venetian blonde man’s chest and pass his arm on his stomach.

«Hum.» Naoya whispered.

«Are you uncomfortable? I thought you might be cold.» Thoma asked, his green eyes letting out a facetious glint, happy with the reaction he obtained from the kitsune.

«Is this really ok?» Naoya asked, while his fox ears cutely quivered back, which didn’t not escape the eye of the housekeeper.

«Of course it is. I felt it would be much more comfortable that way.» Thoma reassured.

«Thank you.» Naoya answered before nuzzling onto the man’s chest.

Before Ayato even had time to sulk, the kitsune searched for Ayato’s arm behind him and pulled it over him, befittingly making the other the bigger spoon. He maintained his hold on the commissioner's hand and went as far as intertwining their fingers together and resting them on Thoma’s stomach. Soon a third hand covered theirs, completing their embrace. Naoya knew that he would overheat sooner or later trapped like he was, but that concern faded away as he fell asleep in their arms.

[lupihero]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; mun & muse - meme.

tagged by: @bxstiae​ thank u!! tagging: anyone who wants to do this ♡

fill out & repost ♥ this meme definitely favors canons more, but i hope oc’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. multi-muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au ( has au verses ) / canon-divergent / fandomless

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom? YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO / MAYBE.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO / MAYBE.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?  —  pretty strictly. tbh i think i could do with a little more canon-divergence but i usually focus pretty hard on canon and diverging too far in my own muses, unless they were poorly written, tends to bother me.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  need a sweet country boy with a heart of gold who loves hard and fast and considers everyone he loves as part of his family ? how about a boy that can kick your ass to the sacred realm and back with his bare hands and a dizzying amount of strength ? how about a big friendly wolf that really doesn’t act all that much like a wolf but is big and soft and a really nice companion ? a boy that carries on and sees the best in people despite his trauma ? a boy who’s an absolute fucking dork and loses his mind whenever he sees a cat ? will smith poses @ link

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).   —  he’s the protagonist, he’s too nice, too likable, and he might be, from some perspectives, super overpowered. a lot of his flaws are issues that come with a lot of protagonist characters, like selflessness to a fault, recklessness, a desire to help no matter the cost, etc., and it might come across as overdone or unoriginal for someone like him.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  twipri has been my favorite video game of all time since i first played it the xmas after it came out, when i was 7. it was an unbelievably huge influence on my life, and got me through a whole lot of shit i’d have to go through up until i was a teenager. it was a constant for me, a comfort. and link, being the protagonist, was of course the center of it. i connected to him really hard, and becoming him whenever i played the game was like magic to me as a kid. honestly, i dont know why i didnt write him until this year, because he’s been such an easy headspace for me to slip into for years. ig i just figured it was about time? id already written both tp zel and midna at separate points, so it was only right to complete the trio ksjfgh

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  the game itself, its soundtrack, art, linked universe and its little fandom, and you guys! just seeing all of your posts and your passion for loz and its characters helps fuel the love i have for it too!

Some more personal questions for the mun.

give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

Do you frequently write headcanons? YES / NO. ( i have. built up a lot of hcs about this boy over the years )

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO. ( i usually do write drabbles every now and then, idk why i haven’t for link yet )

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO. ( hmm i mean. i think i am, anyway?? i like the way i portray him, but i guess im sorta insecure about whether or not yall like my portrayal lmao )

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO. ( more or less, it depends on the day. back when i was a Gifted Kid my Gift was writing, and i was literally always chosen to read things i wrote aloud at school assemblies and things, so i. very much have a love / hate relationship w it )

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO. ( i mean. i try really hard not to be but :’^) )

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  tbh, i don’t know?? i usually do with other muses, but bc twi is very special to me i have literally no idea how well i would take it. of course, if u do have criticism ( of the constructive sort, of course ), i still welcome it

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  yes!!! if you ever have anything you wanna know about twi and the way i write him, please ask!!!

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  nope. unless it’s in the context of sharing hcs back and forth and building on each other or part of a friendly conversation, i don’t want to hear why you think i’m wrong. i still think about that personal that rb’d a hc i made a month or so ago and put in the tags all the reasons they disagreed w me and i wish i didn’t bc i hate it

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —   i?? dunno??? i guess i’d just tell them to unfollow. i’m not here to write link the way you think he should be written, i’m here to write him the way i want to.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  hkljfg does anyone hate link??? like. he’s link. he’s neutral at worst. but it’s not my business if someone hates him, so to each their own ig

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  mm i don’t mind it, but i don’t really see the point. rp is a form of writing that doesn’t need much editing, and when it does, we are our own editors, so of course we’re going to make mistakes and overlook them. english is a complicated and hard language, and typos/misspellings/grammar errors happen and it’s not a big deal

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  yes!! i’m a very laid-back person in general i think, and of course i have things i won’t tolerate and i’ll speak up when i need to, but at the end of the day rp is a hobby, and it’s something we do to have fun, and i know that having fun is the most important part of doing this. though, sometimes i think my anxiety & fear of confrontation might make me a little too lenient on things like my own rules tho kjfhg 

that’s about it, congrats for filling out!

[moddux2]

Final post I will be making on this crap since I haven’t made a rant/comment on all this shit since I was asleep, going to do it in one big post and then disregard it.

[cracks fingers]

Okay this is going to be my one and only final post on the issue because holy shit what little bit of reasonable “hear out what they’re saying” has ran dry and i’ve had a good night sleep.

I woke up, read some stuff and am 200% done with this shit.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183297862370/hey-if-yall-are-minors-or-have-minor-characters

-only slightly valid point in here is me not marking things on a blog that has (18+) in the description at the top of the page.. I’ll give you that one, the rest though?

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183301207595/alright-yall-listen-up

-this makes my head cave in, you make a post calling me one of the most disgusting things on this planet... and then say “stop it” when people send death threats and suicide bait? Get the fuck off your non-existent moral high ground you asshat.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183301289215/hey-theoriginalknightverse-you-wanna-do-this

-I was asleep when this was made so i’m reading this on the spot. I don’t think/know if i’ve ever interacted with you prior.

-Second, beginning your shit with “oh i was abused by a pedo when i was a child” is a terrible thing to hear but doesn’t make you any more or less qualified to talk about something so why bring it up at all? If not to get “victim points”?

-this catsuit nonsense, me basically saying, hey, you say “nice” and “cute” about art and art styles too, maybe I should throw your own logic back in your face and see how you like it.

- your next part “blah blah blah me good and don’t follow minors”, good for you neither do I, I literally cannot follow any more blogs because my main is pretty much at the follow cap with stupid meme blogs and dead blogs from the pre purge so i don’t know where you’re getting that from.

-your next part with the “they don’t age because dead, forever 13!”, fuck off with that reach, get that weak shit outta here. “Can’t age them up, checkmate!”, counterpoint, They’re aged up, fuck even in the lore of the comic with “paradox space” being a thing there’s a 100% guarantee in the infinite timelines/doomed timelines there’s a one where they’re out there of age, so your argument is bullshit even in universe.

- then you move onto condescending asshat territory again “just make a sfw blog", I make sfw, “not sfw enough, bad” fuck off ya unpleasable twat.

-”flag your blog as adult” - see previous point about (18+)

-” en g a g e your cr i t ic a l thinking” wow you’re a condescending prick.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183301355625/hey-i-get-what-youre-trying-to-do-but-your-post

-oh boy, ready for disappointment.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183301797570/rhysing-oc-hey-if-yall-are-minors-or-have

- I am entertained now nevermind.

-Dragging someone else’s blog you have a problem with, nice, unnecessary but nice, glad to see you’re venting everything.

-image link 1 and image link 2, not my art and I expect that you as the moral paragon of the homestuck fandom to bring down retribution on the two blogs i found those from also you beacon of just purity.

-image link 3... it broke me.

... Ya’ll are stupid, Moddux isn’t a minor, even a cursory glance at my blog for more than three seconds could have shown that. This, this is the point I actually realized you don’t give a shit about evidence and stopped taking you seriously as someone concerned about non-existent things, again, untagged on a blog marked (18+).

- link 4, not my art, link 5, a cheeky little accusation of “transphobia thrown at me” ;) you shouldn’t have you sly dog you.

link 5, actually my art, and was requested by a different blog, and within tumblr’s terms and conditions. also a casual “himself” throwing out genders on people you don’t know, very rude~.

link 6, I cannot defend myself on this one, sorry everyone, Terezi should be even bigger and I should have drawn Aradia in there as well, Sorry everyone again... Maybe a Vriska and Feferi flipping the viewer off as Kanaya  is doing a handstand?

link 6 part two, you seem to be a progressive type so i’m honestly quite hurt you’re against different female body types, so fucking ruuuuuude.

==

Point of note, I don’t care when I reblog, my mind is pretty much abscent, i see are and i’m like, neat, reblog, I get drawing prompts and requests from people and i’m like, k, and draw it. 

There’s nothing there except meme, shitposting (for the most part) and doing art requests for people that want/ask for it/have a troll description but no art of them, also weird requests because fuckit, i’ve seen the modern internet from its birth to its rapidly approaching slow death.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183302440860/and-yet-from-those-pictures-linked-none-of-them

-pointing out any problems with previous post ::

- If you can brand people monsters unjustly in a fever of self righteousness and cannot handle when people call you out on, perhaps just do with normal people do, block and move on with with your life instead of throwing hissy fits.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183302505740/anyway-anyone-else-who-wants-to-come-at-me-can

- “you have no critical thinking”

-shoo

- sounds to me like someone doesn’t like backlash after accusations, but that’s none of my business as i’m blocked.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183302705580/minor-here-who-saw-them-popping-up-on-my-dash-a

-an anon with a reasonable point of view a reasonable response to feeling uncomfortable with content and that’s fairly impartial and says a reasonable response. And what do you do?

- you make yourself a nice big dose of dopamine right to the head and tickle your ego to justify all this shit, dragging someone’s name through the mud, dragging a bunch of others through the mud just to make yourself feel G O O D that you did it and for no real reason.

https://rhysing-oc.tumblr.com/post/183304003670/if-i-may-ask-youre-not-mad-at-the-artist-that

home stretch.

-tagging post purge on tumblr is FUCKED.

- there was a nice tag where it could all be safely stored but it’s gone because tumblr is FUCKED.

-it would be real nice if... if there was some sort of check box one could tick on one’s blog to put it in a nsfw state where people don’t just stumble onto it all the damn time... oh wait, there was...

“And it was beautiful...”

A few solutions - Bring back the nsfw tag (won’t happen)

Purge all over 18 blo- oh wait... they tried that, it did fuck all except make a ton of content producers leave.

...

purge the under 18′s from the site... Could work but would likely do much like option two.

-

Long story short, my blog is marked 18+ in the description (which it already is), I’ll think about maybe sprinkling some more tags on content, and other than that... eh... nothing else will really change almost like I was doing nothing wrong to begin with and this is all just a collective waist of everyone’s time for the most part that did nothing but waist time, made you feel good and made a lot of people very disappointed and  very cross.

-

final note, those wanting to keep this fake ass nonsense going, just... don’t, you probably have better things you could be doing with your time, like... anything at all really.