#short haircuts girl tumblr

[foreverbaby25]

[adelelaurii]

Blonde bob for summer☀️💛

[h0munculs]

Before ✂️ my hair

[curvyblackfashionbeauty]

👑👑

[curleybae]

New Haircut 💇‍♀️ 🫣🤭

[im-lost-in-daisies]

Feeling comfy with my new haircut 💇‍♀️

[gogetyrshovel]

lesbian instagram: [still from the l word generation q] hey guys i don't really feel like running lesbianmememachinev2 anymore but use my discount code SELFLUV for 20% off Adam and Eve ® Vibrators

lesbian tiktok: skinny white woman with a mildly unconventional haircut: not the le$bean community agreeing that Shitt McFart is the universal exception #le$bean #foryou #shittmcfart #shittmcfartnation

lesbian twitter: [image of katy perry with short hair] omg her butch era slay

lesbian tumblr: eroticmachinelvr: robot girl who takes a screenshot when she orgasms #i havent had sex in 2 years pleas ehelp me

[sailorblossoms-rankane]

(Posting my threads on tumblr so I can talk to fellow Akane/Rankane enjoyers, part 3) (manga exclusive, I haven't seen the 80s anime)

One of the first things we learn about Akane is that she’s both violent and sweet. Both are true, and much can be said about her hair journey.

Akane’s violent side is immediately obvious while her sweet side is more apparent along the journey. She’s trusting and caring, even with people who have done nothing but wrong her (a mf will try to kill her and she’ll still be like “I feel sorry for them/I want to help them”)

Her sweet side is also introduced when she meets Ranma. She sees someone uncomfortable in an uncertain/awkward situation, and she’s the first to reach out and be welcoming.

Akane’s haircut is violent, brutal, and shocking. As shocking as Ranma entering her world. It happens during the first real fight Ranma has on page, and it's likely no coincidence. Something is off with long-haired Akane... with the cut, she enters Ranma’s world as her true self.

Akane’s long hair is tied to Akane trying to be like Kasumi: modest, calm, quiet. It’s Akane trying to be someone she’s not, because she wants to feel loved and wanted. If she likes a boy, she wants to be liked back (as opposed to disliked because she’s too "boyish")

When Akane crushes on the doc, that’s a girl used to being bothered and harassed by boys (boys who think “I can beat her into dating me”) fixating on a safe male figure because he makes her feel secure and cared for (literally treating her wounds)

(To contrast: Ranma being stronger isn’t “she must submit to me,” which is what was associated with a boy beating her... it's usually “I’m stronger so I want to look out for her/help her/protect her” and that part makes her feel secure and cared for)

Akane “changing herself” isn’t really about getting the doc to like her, but about Akane feeling judged and inadequate as her true "tomboy self," because even if she cuts her hair short she still likes being feminine… and she’s constantly told she’s not.

Just look at how she dresses. Other female characters might often wear pants (outside of the school uniform, Nabiki usually wears jeans and shorts for example) but Akane is rarely not wearing a cute little skirt or a dress. Calling her uncute pokes at a sore spot.

Changing herself doesn’t give her what she wants, it just reaffirms her insecurity (if you have to stop being yourself to feel accepted, are you really accepted?). When the doc says "short hair always did suit you better," it doesn’t make her happy because she doesn’t actually want him.

Part of why he’s safe is because he knows her just as she is and still never judges when others do. “Short hair always did suit you better" is also “you didn’t need to change yourself to be accepted, you were always fine just as you are.”

This is part of why she cries so hard and why afterward she’s immediately over him… she mourns what she felt and believed (and perhaps the effort it took, growing out a pixie is not for the weak lol) and is ready to turn the page. But the insecurity that sparked it all remains.

That Ranma preferring her short hair makes her smile is an early sign that he stirs something in her. It also says something important: he can tease and insult her all he wants, but he likes Akane just as she is

And that includes her violence. her anger and her fire. When Akane is upset and tries a cooler approach, Ranma won’t let her. he prefers Akane sending his ass flying than her ignoring him 100%

I think Ranma also likes Akane’s "specific brand" of violence, because everyone and their mom is violent here (including Nabiki… psychological violence if you will lol) and outside of challenges/battles he only seeks hers by teasing her, knowing how she’s going to react.

(everyone is a martial artist/violent but I think part of why Akane is clocked as more tomboy-ish is attitude. All the girls will use “their feminine charms,” even Ranma, but Akane will grab a fucker by the shirt, look at them in the eye and jut out her chin, and that's "masculine")

Akane wants to feel normal, she wants to be liked by the one she likes. she associates “you’re not normal” as a negative thing, as “you will be disliked”... even if Ranma means it as “Akane is tougher than a regular girl” (positive) that's not what she hears.

Kasumi means no harm, she knows Akane well and wants to look out for her. but that gives her words more impact, and Akane looks up to her as the ideal of femininity (she also only wears skirts and dresses) (Akane has likely heard this shit a lot too, she was cast as Romeo, etc)

Ranma knows he can be a jerk, but he genuinely doesn’t realize he's saying insensitive shit just when Akane is at her most sensitive... when she snaps, that’s her armor coming up to protect her heart (just like being a jerk can be armor for Ranma)

So Ranma hurts Akane's feelings without realizing (being a jerk is armor because his feelings are too big, too much for him, and he’s not ready to deal with them) but takes Akane's angry response as her hurting his feelings.

This causes the following pattern: Ranma “lifts Akane up,” telling her exactly what she needs to hear from him, soothing her insecurities… and then completely lets her down/disappoints her by telling her exactly what she doesn’t need to hear.

Look at Akane’s face. she could’ve accepted Ranma's apology and moved on. Instead, she’s vulnerable and ready to admit fault too... she’s touched by the idea of Ranma wanting to make up because he wants to be with her (but then he downplays it lol a word-class fumbler fr)

And... he doesn't realize he’s doing this! he doesn’t want to hurt her. whenever he realizes he hurt her he always wants to fix it, even if he doesn’t fully get what he did wrong or why Akane is mad and/or how to make it better.

But “lifting Akane up and then kicking her down” is the type of shit that makes Akane feel like she needs to protect her heart. In a way, Ranma’s armor (jerk) makes Akane’s come up and vice-versa, so neither can give in. It's part of why admitting feelings is very difficult

There’s also Ranma throwing easy “I love you’s” when he thinks it's a challenge with people he has no feelings for, but completely combusts when he realizes he said to the person he’s in love with. It’s too much for him and he’s not ready to admit it, so “he takes it back”

On Akane's side, she isn't unaffected by hearing the boy she loves confess and then "take it back"... even if she can be perceptive and understands Ranma’s shenanigans this sparks more insecurity (and then jealousy)

This contributes to Akane being quick to get angry & misunderstand certain situations, as she’s expecting Ranma to “let her down”/ has no confidence that he doesn’t want anyone else (besides Ranma being in “impossible not to misunderstand situations, for the bit”)

Akane being perceptive but her insecurities getting to her: she knows Ranma. She’s correct in her assessment that he fucked up and is hiding it. But doesn’t clock his deflection because damn, what if he actually wants someone else, what if they have something she doesn’t

But Akane always goes back to believing in him. Because even if he disappoints her, she understands that he's just not thinking, it's his ego, he doesn't mean it, the situation is too much for him to handle etc. And he never stops trying to make sure they’re on good terms.

Also, Ranma makes her feel safe and protected. She likes that he’s strong and never gives up. She knows she can count on him when it matters most (which is why she’s also his ride or die, goes both ways). It’s part of why when she’s jealous, she imagines Ranma protecting Nabiki.

It’s not something she thinks about consciously, but being the one Ranma wants to protect above everyone and all else is part of how Ranma shows his feelings for her, and on some level, she can tell… one of the first moments ranma makes her heart speed up is this

She likes that Ranma protects her and that she can count on him, but she never wants to be a burden or the reason he has to sacrifice something. just like how Ranma wants to protect her above all else, no one goes as far as she does for his sake (see also: the final arc)

Adding on the crush on the doc: just like this scene, it's likely that whenever Akane went to see him, her wounds weren't just physical. "I hate boys" is not something she means as she never treats anyone with hatred, but it's coming from a place of frustration/exhaustion.

Each daily challenge would be annoying by itself, but the repetitiveness of it all would wear her down. Note how she never goes "I hate boys" again after it stops. It's only just "I hate Ranma, specifically" because he hurt her... but she doesn't mean that either

Ranma's presence puts an end to those challenges, so he brings her peace in that sense. His world comes with craziness and dangers, but unlike the school challenges, this is something Akane chooses to face because she wants to support him.

Fighting annoying boys because you don't want to date them and fighting to support a loved one are completely different things. The former wears Akane down, while she's passionate about the latter. Just like how she counts on Ranma to protect her, she always wants to have his back.

[corviiids]

hi rook sorrgy I'm back but I've been thinking about your akeshu as girls genderfuckery tweet for 20 million years. idk if you can share anything in good faith here on the Tumblr corner of the internet (if not then by all means ignore this) but if you did I'd owe you perhaps my entire soul!! thank you very much either way :3

i would LOVE to talk about this thank you so much for asking

[under the cut in case anyone would not like to see genderfuckery stuff]

okay so first of all.

on the topic of boobs

this is important to lead with do you understand. most of the akeshu as girls stuff ive seen around has akc as flat-chested and ren as boobed. and that's valid i support that. but personally. personally to me. i think it's the opposite. tbe reason (well one reason) i think it's the opposite is because i think girlren is a little rat of a creature and akechi who is prim and feminine and perfect is so FUCKING angry about her crush on ren like she's barely surviving it and then this is the nail in the coffin. she's like why can't i stop thinking about that messy unassuming thing. she doesn't even have boobs

my other reasons for tihs are that i think joker is more androgynous charm while akechi is more feminine/masculine duality i think this makes sense to nobody else. i think ren regardless of agab is riding the rail of the gender spectrum 🛹 while akc is collecting extremes of gender presentation like they're pokemon do you understand. are we on the same page here. ren being into drag is important to me for this reason (again regardless of agab). meanwhile akechi having very clear feminine secondary sex characteristics but presenting gradually more and more masculine in terms of clothing/hair/personal style etc. is also extremely important to me. and that includes being biog of tity while her style veers more and more into masc as time goes on

ok

the detective prince

i think girl akechi (at 17-18) presents very femininely because it's what's effective for her. i would call her style................... kawaii corporate chic. does that make sense for everyone. it's like schoolgirl girlboss. she has a bow instead of a tie but it's a very classy one not a kitschy one. smart blazer, uniform pleated skirt, patent leather shoes, u know the drill BUT. people still call her the detective prince. this is VERY IMPORTANT to me. no detective princess. only detective prince. do you understand the importance of the genderfuckery of a super feminine girl being called by masculine terms. to me. we're continuing the legacy set by my hero naoto shirogane bigender queeng. bigender kin. bigender genderneutral non-monarchical ruler

i think by third sem girl akechi is starting to dress more androgynously/masculinely. more pants. i think her third sem outfit is unchanged from canon. just a smart coat, sweater, buttondown, slacks. postcanon she gets a haircut.

just trying to live an honest student life

ren is like so fundamentallyuncomfortable with the fact of his existence at the beginning of canon so to me girlren is like... she dresses like she's trying to hide in her clothes. messy hair. i have no strong feelings about whetehr her hair should be long or short, or whether it's loose or pulled into a tail, but i know it's messsy. untamed curls. and she uses it to hide her face. none of her clothes fit. she's in oversized everything. i have a very clear image in my head of a ren idle animation where she leans down to pull up her leggings because they keep falling down. she also has terrible posture. she's androgynous at this stage not on purpose but because she's too self conscious to like... exist... and present... in any notable way at all

i think as she gets more confident and as the year progresses she starts to dress more distinctively. i like the idea of her getting more comfortable prettying up. maybe working at crossroads helps her with this 🤔 i dont know how to explain this but i think she's still feminine in a gentlemanly chivalrous way rather than a girly cute way. girlren has that same steady calming vibe that guy ren does

joker & crow

crow has a magical girl skirt. i have a drawing of this but im too self conscious about my own lack of drawing skill to show it off so i cropped out the key part and put it into an ms paint void in the distance as my visual aid

there. i hope this is illustrative

i think given girl akechi's use of her feminine charms to gain popularity, her hero complex would be similarly gendered given we have confirmation that robin hood represents not (only) heroics for altruistic reasons but also the theatre of being seen doing good. there's a real drama element to the idea of a magical girl transformation that i honestly wish we got for male crow too. i always am depressed that we don't get to see much theatre for akechi's initial appearance as crow and summoning of robin hood, anyway, girlcrow has ribbons and a capelet that flap in non-existent wind.

black mask's outfit is unchanged from canon. i'd like it to look a little less stupid but that has nothing to do with gender i just want it to look a little less stupid.

joker's outfit is also unchanged from canon. listen. im back on my bullshit. in the metaverse her behaviour gets more feminine and more sly and confident than in reality. she's got that femme fatale shit going on. however, she is still a gentleman thief. she has the long coat. she has the poofy trousers. she has the waistcoat. she's still smirking and fixing her gloves and flipping her knife and doing that thing that canon ren does where he lifts his chin and does the little "come on" thing with her fingers. do you understand? do you understand me

[justjams2003]

Fast Pace- 12

Before we start, I'd just like to wish you all a very happy New Year! Know that there is plenty more to come from me in the coming year. And also thank you all for 420 followers (haha nice), I'm still in shock that people keep coming back and wants more. Believe it or not, this is the most active community and website I have ever written for and I'm so glad to have found Tumblr. Anyways enjoy xoxo

Summary: You're a hard-working Chef in Paris and after a freak accident run-in with Carlos Sainz, your life makes a 180. Let's just say with a certain agreement, you get your bills paid and in return stand in as Carlos' girlfriend for the press. But will you be able to handle the pressure and ensure the lines don't blur?

Pairing: Sugar Daddy!Carlos Sainz x Sugar Baby!Reader

Warnings: I've aged up Carlos, he is 33 in this fic. Smoking, smut, sexual themes, age difference, manipulation, control, slight obsession, the word 'daddy', nudity, a garbage family, family trauma, disowning, tell me if I missed any

Taglist: @httpjeonlicious, @f1lov3r, @messersandmesses, @hollie911, @oriconde08 @thehufflepuffavenger1 @fanboyluvr @thatgirlmj @whyamireadingthis @oriconde08 @depressedriches @roseseraj @skepvids @sain55wifey @distinguishedvoidlady @amatswimming @sachaa-ff @lightdragonrayne @lazybot @formula1mount @fangirl-dot-com @saintslewis @carlossainzwho @lordpercevalcharles @topguncultleader @kitixie @serp3ns0rtiae @hangmandruigandmav @therealone4r @keii134 @dark-night-sky-99 @jax-the-oregonian @hachrinnen

Word count: 3,1k

Masterlist

Part 11~Part 13 (coming soon)

“Echanté de voi rencontre, Monsur.” Carlos is trying his best, but at the moment he is butchering your home-tongue. You can’t but be nervous, he however seems as calm as a cucumber about meeting your parents. He’s got the sunglasses on that you gave him. You can see from where your sitting, your initials carved into the side. “No, no, mon cher. Good try, but it’s Enchanté de vous rencontrer, Monsieur.”  

He sighs, rubbing his face in his hands. He looks so much more relaxed already. He’s got short khaki’s on and a casual button up shirt. You’ve hired a more practical car for the week, one with a big trunk. You got your family lots of presents and might have overpacked a bit. Still not used to having such a big amount of money. But even still, you have the sunroof open, enjoying the county side air.  

“I’m sorry, mi querida,” he shakes his head and rakes his fingers through his hair. You can’t help yourself, tucking the stray hairs that fray in the wind behind his ears. “I should’ve gotten a haircut before we came.” He sighs, but you can see that he enjoys your touch. “No, it is the perfect length, don’t change a thing about it.” He gives a side-eye but you can only laugh. “No, it’s in the way.” 

You pout, “No, your hair is just long enough to...grab...” you mutter, taking a handful of hair and pulling on it ever so slightly. Surprisingly, a growl escapes his throat. The noise causes a warmth to spread through your body.

The sunlight hits his skin just beautifully, he looks like hot caramel. Something you want to drizzle into your mouth. You’re sure you could cook a steak on his sizzling skin.  

“This is your home then?” He asks, while caring the bags. He refuses to let you carry a single one. You nod and then knock on the door. “It is a small house for 7 people, no?” He’s not wrong. “Oui, us three girls had to share a room and the boys shared a room.” He grimaces at your words, “Then one day we will have a big house.” You blush at his words and wrap your arms around his, all while subtly taking a photo.  

The door opens, you only now realise how short your mom has gotten. Or maybe it really has been so long. “Ah, ma fille, tu viens enfin rendre visite à ta vieille mère. Cela fait si longtemps et enfin tu ramènes un homme à la maison!” She instantly starts rambling and then opens up her arms and gives Carlos a big hug. “N'es-tu pas si beau? Quel est votre nom et pourquoi êtes-vous avec ma fille?”  

Carlos looks like a fish out of water. His face is entirly blank and he just seems to be nodding along. “Enchanté de vous rencontrer, Mademoiselle,” he stutters through the French, his Spanish accent still blatantly obvious. Your mother just frowns at his bad French. “He doesn’t speak French.” Her wide smile turns sour, “Pourquoi faire venir un homme inutile qui ne parle pas français?”  

You sigh and then nudge him, “the presents,” you whisper. “Il s'appelle Carlos et il a apporté des cadeaux.” Now she really does smile as he holds up the presents. “Oui, come in, come in.” Like always, he allows you to walk in first.

“What did she say?” He asks to you in a whisper. You sigh and shake your head. “Nothing that you need to worry yourself about.” You give him a kiss on the cheek, trying to soothe his usually worry.  

“Apportez-lui quelque chose à boire, je suis sûr qu'il est fatigué après son très long voyage.” You sigh, of course she asks that of you. As if you and him didn’t have the same trip. You turn to Carlos after he sat down along with your mother to open her present, that you picked out. 

 “Carlos, what would you like to drink?” He frowns and then stands up. He takes your arm and then leads you to the couch. “You must be tired, mi querido, it was a four-hour trip, I’m sure you are tired.” He leads you to sit down next to him, he pulls you into his side. Everything in you wants to cuddle into his side, but you can feel your mother’s judgemental eyes on you.  

Instead, you shake your head, “My mother insists that I get you something to drink. You did drive after all.” You can see the tick in his jaw, clearly not happy with this. He smiles, forced clearly, “Please tell your mother I don’t need anything to drink.” You sigh and do just so and she replies with some comment insisting you do just that. Yes, you are exhausted but even still you stand and pour him a drink.  

“Je vais lui montrer la chambre.” You grab him by the arm and pull him up towards your old bedroom. Quite ungracefully you fall on your childhood bed. He smirks, but his smile is quick to fall. “Mi dulce niña, does she always make you feel like this?” Carlos asks you give and exhausted laugh. “You don’t even know what she said,” you peak at him, and he pulls you into his lap.  

He kisses your forehead, “Tell me," You sigh and rest you head on his shoulder. “When she met you, she went, ‘you’re so handsome why are you dating my daughter?’ And then she went, ‘you’re so stupid bringing a man that doesn’t even speak French.’ Then after that it was, ‘poor thing he’s so tired bring him something to drink.’ As if I wasn’t on the exact same trip as you!”  

His jaw locks and his arms wrap tighter around you, “Does she always speak to you like that,” you sigh and sink deeper into his arms. “Why do you think I brought you with. Call you my armour,” you laugh, actually hiding behind his arms. He laughs, but it’s the same type of awkward type, “Where is your dad, is he any better?”  

You hum and then walk down the stairs again after taking your breather and then ask your Maman where your father is. “He is outside with your brother, working hard as always,” she says, still in French.

“Really, which one?” You ask, opening the back door, only to see your oldest brother chopping wood while your father carves the same wood right next to him. “Bér!” You call out and once he sees you, he smiles.  

You walk into the back fields, Carlos trailing behind you and when you do finally meet your brother, he gives you a warm hug. “Finally, back in your own country,” he comments, and you can’t help but furrow your brows. “What do you mean?” You ask, you haven’t told anyone about anything. “You think I haven’t noticed? I am not like Mama and Papa who do not own a phone and use the library’s computer to email you.”  

You frown and watch his eyes. They’re train on Carlos who seems to be struggling with the mud and his very expensive shoes. “Traveling the world with mister Armani,” he teases you like always, and you can’t help but step on his shoes. “Enchanté, Monsieur.” Carlos holds out his hand and it makes you and your brother laugh out loud. “Don’t worry, race-man... I am not her father.” You jab your brother in the stomach.  

“But he’s even worse.” He groans and then begins complaining in French but you’re quick to stop him. “Connard, you know Carlos doesn’t speak French, clearly, you’ve been stalking him. So don’t be an ass,” Bérenger sighs at your words and then translates for Carlos.

“I was just saying that I you see in your fancy Ferrari and your expensive shoes, no one in the family can understand someone like you being with a dull girl like her.” He shrugs and you both laugh, it’s the way you talk as siblings.  

Even so, Carlos’ expression turns sour. “He much more than that Bérenger, now, play nice.” Before you turn to leave to say hello to your father, you ask your brother one last thing. This time in French, because you’d rather not have Carlos know just yet. “How is Papa today?” You brother hesitates, knowing exactly what you’re talking about. “He’s there, like before, no confusion yet today.”  

You nod and make your way over. “Bonjour Papa, I’ve come to visit.” Your father looks up to you, his eyes clear. Not that his personality has changed much, he replies in a gruff tone. “Who’s the boy?” His eyes are like daggers on Carlos.

“He’s my boyfriend,” your dad rolls his eyes. “Yeah, sure. And for how long is he going to put up with you?” You laugh, like always keeping the peace. “I’m not some terrible burden. At least, not in his eyes.”  

Like always he just replies with a scoff.  

Before long, you’re washing dishes after dinner. “Mi paloma, please tell your mother the dinner was delicious.” You can feel his big strong arms wrap around your waist. You’re sure he's feeling a bit alone. It’s only been you and your brother here who can even speak English.

You smile, “Thank you, Carlos, but she didn’t make it.” It’s the truth, the whole evening Bérenger and Carlos chopped wood, all while you have to take care of your mother’s ever whim, like always.  

It doesn’t bother you; it’s always been like this. But you can tell it’s getting to Carlos. “No wonder I liked it so much, it’s your cooking. But, mi dulce niña, you barely ate, aren’t you hungry?” He caresses yours even as you continue washing. “Thank you, Carlos, it’s nice hearing some positive words after that dinner.” He sighs, burrowing his face on the crook of your neck.  

“You’re avoiding my question.” He places small kisses here and there. “It’s not in the diet plan,” it’s an excuse, your mother had been commenting on your weight all evening. Yes, it’s true you’d gained weight, but you’d been working out and most of it is muscle. But her words are sharp, and the thoughts are springing up. If it makes her happy, better so. He does his usual noise when he’s unhappy when something.  

“Tomorrow I’ll cook dinner,” you gasp, turning to him, his words have caused delight in you. “I’d like to see that,” his brows furrow but a smug look is on his face. “What? You don’t think I can?” In your mind, yes, he has a difficult life, but that’s just stress. He has personal chefs and personal trainers and likely his father had too. Not way did he ever learn to cook. “No, not at all.” 

You cross your arms, and he just laughs. “Fine then, I'll show you. You can even post it on your Instagram.” This sparks joy, you love seeing people’s reactions to you and him.

So far, they’ve been nothing but positive. In these short three weeks you’ve gotten 50k new followers. If they’re there for you or Carlos, doesn’t matter to you. You’ll give them what they want either way.  

“You mean it?” Your hands reach up and take hold of his shirt. “Only if you eat,” and with that you bite your lip and nod. “Okay, you’ve got yourself a deal.” He sighs, takes a drying rag and begins helping you by putting away the dishes. “Oh Carlos! Ne perdez pas votre temps avec la vaisselle, Y/N la fera. Laisse-moi te montrer ses photos de bébé.”  

You sigh, leaning your head against his chest. “Oh no,” his brows furrow pulling you away to see what the matter is. “She wants to show you my baby pictures.” A deep laugh escapes his chest. “Mi querida, I’d love to help you finish this, but I can’t miss that.” You laugh but do allow him to see little you.  

“What colour are you choosing?” You ask your mother, watching as she scans through the different nail polishes. Like expect she chooses a toned-down pink, she rarely does her nails but when she does, it’s always that same colour. “Why don’t you choose something different? Look I’m going with this black with gold shimmer. We’re somewhere nice, don’t you want to use the opportunity?”  

Your mother just looks at you over her glasses. “And why is that?” It’s already Thursday, the week had been going by slower than you expected it would and only made you realise why you visit so little.

The only good thing so far has been your father’s awareness, he’s had a few moments of unclarity these past few months. Even so, just like growing up, he doesn’t exactly stand up for you against your mother’s badgering.  

Like always, it's just the usual gruff short replies and relative quietness. Carlos, however, has been nothing but kind. The dinner he cooked was amazing, the fans swooned in your comments. At night he’d hold you tight and whisper sweet nothings. All about how beautiful you are and how you’re perfect as is. It helps, yes, but nothing compares to motherly love. You do everything you can, but still don’t feel like enough.  

“Ah, Mama, don’t be like that.” After that, she continues about the gossip of the town and the lives of your siblings. That is of course until you’re sitting at the dinner table again. Enjoying the food Carlos has crafted to fit both of your diets, showing him your nails. He loves them and makes sure to kiss your knuckles.  

That is, until your mother interrupts your bliss. “Y/N, what did you say Carlos does?” You bite the inside of your cheek. “He is a Formula one driver.” You mutter, trying to hide yourself behind her sharp glare. “And are you still a chef?” You swallow your food; you’ve been avoiding this question for as long as possible. You shake your head, “No, Mama,” her bitter stare grows stronger.  

“So, what is it that you do?” She raises her voice, now your father seems interested. “I am working on my modelling career.” Both your parents groan and gasp in raised tones. “This again,” your brother mutters, he too has been harsh with you. “Why do you keep going on and on about this modelling. Ever since you were small. My daughter, you know I love you, but you aren’t like those pretty girls.”  

Her words are like knifes; knifes reopening wounds you’d been working so hard to heal. Carlos takes your hand under the table. This whole time he’d been encouraging you to stand up for yourself. Convincing you that what they’re saying aren’t normal and that you shouldn’t tolerate it. You’ve tried persuading him or more yourself that she’s your mother and she does it out of love.  

But she’s been ungrateful all week. As if she hasn’t been begging you to come home and talk to her. She comments on everything, your weight, your hair even your laugh. Saying you squeal like a pig, you tried to laugh less after that one. She hates her nails and all the presents you brought home. More than all, you’ve been dreading this happening. Hoping that it never would.  

“No, Mama, I do not know that you love me,” she gasps and begins screaming even more. “How could you not know? I raised you. I fed you, clothed you, gave you the deposit to get your degree. Which you don’t even use now!” The anger over comes you and you rise from your chair. “Carlos will gladly pay back all that money if I was such a burden on you!”  

The whole table goes eerily quiet. Soon it is interrupted by a scoff from your brother. “So what? He’s like your Sugar Daddy, right?” You take a moment to calm down, trying to decide if you’re going to say the truth. But they're your family. You should never lie to your family, right? “Yes,” you take his hand back into yours. You can see that he’s picked up his name and knows he’s being discussed.  

“What is that, Bérenger?” Your mother asks, switching between you and your brother. “She fucks him for money. A glorified prostitute!” His words are harsh and spit flies as he screams. You know for a fact that if Carlos understood French, he’d be raging.

“Unbelievable!” Your mother gasps out and another raging fire starts in you. “What? Is it so unbelievable that someone could actually love me so much that they’d pay to see me?”  

Years and years or anger and trauma, built up due to constant belittlement finally breaks through. “Why does it shock you all so much that he thinks I’m beautiful. That he thinks I’m more worth than all the riches in the world. You hate it that someone actually respects me, because you can’t knock me down anymore.”

Again, the table goes quiet before your brother speaks again. This time in English, clearly wanting Carlos to understand what he’s saying.  

“He doesn’t respect you. He doesn’t care for you. And he most certainly doesn’t love you. He just wants to fuck you. And once he’s bored of you, he’ll take what he’s given and leave you with nothing.” Before you can curse out your brother, a sharp crack is heard. Your brother is on the floor, nursing a bloody nose. “Don’t you ever, ever talk to her like that ever again.”  

You can hear your mother rambling on about her poor son and can only scoff at her reaction. “I’m not some city boy who doesn’t know how to throw a punch. You won’t believe how strong 6G’s of force make you.” Through all the commotion, there is a muttering that can be heard. Listening carefully, it is your father. “Get out, get out,” he repeats over and over.  

You bow your head down low, right by his ear but just shake off his words. This irritates him and he too raises his voice. “Get out, you’re no daughter of mine.” You laugh at his words, “Don’t be silly, Papa, you must be having one of your episodes.” You go to rub his back, in your mind to soothe him but he grabs your wrist before he can.  

“Hear me when I say this girl, because I am clear of mind when I do. While you are still whoring yourself out to this man, you are no daughter of mine.” The realisation hits you like a truck. So much so, that you stagger back, Carlos catching you as your head becomes dizzy. “Mi pequeña, what is the matter?” All you can do is shake your head.  

“Come, Carlos, it seems that we are not welcome here.”   

Just so p.s. me not translating the French and Spanish is for a reason. I'm not just being spiteful, it is part of the storytelling. If you want to get a good grade in fanfic reading (which is totally possible and a very normal thing to want) feel welcome to translate it 😉

Tag list is open, just ask!

[deadly-espresso]

(Ray, Evelynn, Nathan)

I saw a post by @corpsecorpspp on Tumblr were somebody drew these lovely three as the opposite gender (but not really since these three are just extensions of the Storyteller and the Storyteller's gender is... something undefinable), and I got inspired to do my own takes what I'd think these three would look like as the opposite gender.

I thought @corpsecorpspp's interpretations on how'd they look was fine with Evelynn, but I felt more... mixed about Ray and Nathan's designs?

As for Ray, Corpse's design on them was... umm... well... something. It probably looks nice on its own but I think the hair is just too overly long and the shorts and crop top they went with made Ray look more like a villain from a 90s slasher film than anything that a woman from the late 1940s or early 1950s would wear. I did end up taking some inspiration from that design for the top of the outfit on my design, but I ended up deciding to have Ray (Or Rae, in this case, the name is still pronounced the same though lol) wear what looks like a knockoff of Nancy Elsner's main outfit (it's honestly more unsettling when you think about it...) and also give their hair some curls because curly hairstyles were fairly popular at the time; you'll see those kinds of haircuts in plenty of photos from the 1940s and 1950s.

As for Evelynn, Corpse's design on them (they named them Evan) didn't look all that bad, though I wasn't a fan of the short haircut and the long legs on the overalls. I ended up deciding to keep Evelynn's design more similar to their original (or at least the design I came up with for my COMMUNICATIONS fan remake). The only notable differences I came up with for the outfit design was only making the legs on the overalls slightly longer and the hair slightly shorter. I thought the more wild, childish look Evelynn had going on worked better. (Fun fact: I ended up not changing Evelynn's name since Evelynn (or more usually, Evelyn) is a unisex name even if it's usually only used for girls now (the most famous male Evelyn is probably writer Evelyn Waugh).

Lastly, for Nathan, Corpse's design for them (they named them Natasha) was... less anachronistic than Ray's design, but there were still some things that bugged me. The added bows were kind of cute, but the whole outfit just feels too baggy with the addition of the leg warmers (Nathan is from COMMUNICATIONS case 3 and that story was set in Arizona), it doesn't seem all that appropriate to wear in a place like the southwestern US. So, for my design for Nathan (or in this case, Natalie), I ended up going in a very different direction by giving them a much more different outfit. I did decide to use a short skirt like Corpse did, but I instead chose to give them long boots and a more form-fitting upper outfit. The outfit ended up taking notes from the Scene subculture, since that subculture is referenced quite a bit in COMMUNICATIONS case 3, especially in regards to Bri, its focus character.

Note: This post wasn't made to hate on or one-up Corpsecorpspp. I do like their art, and their post did inspire me to do my own take on what Ray, Evelynn, and Nathan would look as the opposite gender. If anything, you should go check out Corpse's page! :3

[heymrspatel]

✨Weekly Tag Wednesday ✨

i was tagged by @jrooc @stocious @michellemisfit @thepupperino @doshiart @sgtmickeyslaughter @gallapiech @blue-disco-lights @mmmichyyy @lingy910y @pookiebearmick @gallawitchxx @energievie and @gardenerian thank you lovelies!

Name and A03 handle: julissa | heymrspatel

Current Location: on my couch, slowly melting into the cushions. i'm so tired.

Favorite picrew (don't have one? you can skip this or do this one)? these two for sure! i think they capture my vibe well lol one & two

What's one thing you want in a picrew? ah! well, since i often start them i have a list of things that i usually look for to make sure that they're inclusive. sometimes i forget to check for certain things and then i'm annoyed lmao.

but ideally: big selection of skin tones, undercuts, the option for tied hair, short haircuts, different types of hair textures and colors, facial hair, scars, and big big ups if there's an option to change face shapes! THIS IS SERIOUS BUSINESS!

for me though: curly hair and big blushy (and fangs if available)

Favourite thing you’ve created (or seen created) for the fandom? oh this is hard. i'll say, fluffy art: "doesn't matter where we go man", spicy art: "i need you to touch me"

Why is it your favourite? fluffy: because i went crazy with the details. i love that it tells a story. i love the colors i used. i love that pane of them watching the sunset. i love hands - hand on thigh, hand kiss, hand under shirt.

spicy: so. much. skin. i love all the positions i put them in. i love how it's sensual and teasing but you can't really see any of the "action" haha. tongues and chain and bruising. i love hands - hand in mouth, hand on neck, hand in hair.

Did it come easily or was it hard to create? HARD! lmao everything i make is hard to me. some things come easier now, but i really do drag my limp body all the way to the end.

Last ao3 fic you commented on? "keep you by my side" by biblionerd07!

Biggest WIP heartache you’ve ever experienced? ...things beyond mistake. i'm glad most of us are on the same painful page.

Favorite trope or head cannon you like included in a fanfic? i love friends/fwb to lovers and slice of life and outsider povs! also, only one bed or when they get stuck somewhere alone. ooooooh and i LOVE a good texting fic!

Least favourite? eeeh very iffy on the kid fics, depends on the writer. or mpreg. or big deaths.

Secret or surprising kink or trope? idk that anything's a secret? i'm out here giving you guys full visuals during kinktober...

Describe how you feel after you’ve created something new? ah- very vulnerable. accomplished but nervous. i literally post and run away.

Top hype man you have that always helps you get across the finish line: i usually keep whatever i'm working on under wraps for no reason other than i'm self conscious! but @whatthebodygraspsnot always cheers me on and is the most supportive and sends me the most eloquent keyboard smashes to keep a girl going!

It's been a bad day, you turn to the fandom and you _____? scroll through tumblr and, when my brain is cooperating on reading (it hasn't been), turn to my comfort fics!

i'm skipping the tag cause i'm late and i'm feeling weird! but i hope everyone's having a nice night/day/time zone!! 💙

[cringefandomtrash]

Hogwarts Legacy Characters.

Gonna show off all my Hogwarts Legacy characters, with little blurbs and facts about them.

My version of Hogwarts is a University; all characters are aged up to 18+. All the Hogwarts Legacy 5th years are roughly 21.

Alice is the main MC, all the others exist in the same universe as her.

We'll start with the main one...

Alice Andromeda Cassowary (She/Her)

~Her full name is Alice Andromeda Cassowary. She's named after her Great-Great-Great Grandmother Alice and her Grandmother Andromeda.

~She's in the Hufflepuff house, which she has technically been sorted into twice.

~She was given a journal by Professor Fig to write her feeling out in, after he met her. Inside the journal was a note from Fig that says 'For the things you can't say out loud'.

~She has two younger brothers named George and Killian who are twins.

~She's paired with Ominis Gaunt.

~She got the scar across the bridge of her nose from a stray piece of wood from the dragon attack on hers and Fig's carriage to Hogwarts. The Wiggenweld potion closed the wound but left it scarred over.

~Alice is the shortest of these characters, being only 4'10ft/147cm

~Her Patronus is a Saint Bernard. I did this because I thought it'd be funny for a really short Hufflepuff girl to have her Patronus be one of the largest dog breeds.

Next up with have...

Karen Heinous (She/Her)

~Karen was originally made with an online friend and was based around the specific haircut she wears in-game. We thought it looked like a Karen Haircut.

~Karen's original last name was " 'Murica" as in America, as a nod to a stereotypical American Karen. As a nod to this, her Patronus is an Eagle.

~Karen is distantly related to Headmaster Black through marriage and thinks it makes her super important and above everyone.

~She's in the Slytherin House.

~She has two older sisters, named Amelia and Penelope.

~Karen is 5'4ft/162cm

Our next character is...

Marjorie Festus (She/They)

~Marjorie was the hardest to design. I originally wanted to give her black hair, but that made her look too much like a female Harry Potter. I then tried ginger/red hair which made her look too much like a Weasley. She also originally had the Professor Garlick braids hair mod, before I decided against it.

~Marjorie is in Gryffindor, but she was almost placed in Ravenclaw.

~She has a pet Ferret named Charlie.

~Marjorie is a muggle-born student.

~She's 5'9ft/174cm

~Marjorie has an older sister named Erika, who has been her caretaker since their parents died. They've struggled since and Marjorie hopes going to Hogwarts and getting a job in the wizarding world can help ease the stress on her Sister.

~Marjorie has a black hairbow that she always wears. It was given to her by her Sister, Erika.

And last but not least, we have...

Diaval Knight (They/Them)

~Diaval is Nonbinary, however they are mostly in the closet. Especially when it comes to their family.

~Diaval is a half-blood. Their mother is a Witch and their father † is a Muggle.

~Diaval's mother taught them that showing emotion is weak, as a result, Diaval grew to be incredibly emotionless. They don't know/remember how most emotions feel.

~Diaval is in Ravenclaw.

~They are the tallest of the 4, being 6'3ft/190cm

~They love to play Quidditch and Imelda is their closest friend since they often discuss it together. Diaval plays as a Keeper.

~Diaval hates to wear their robe over their uniform, finding it uncomfortable.

I hope you all enjoyed reading about my characters. Sorry if this was long and formatted weirdly, I'm still learning to navigate Tumblr some. <3

[thenebuleuse]

Thoughts (since I don't write on Tumblr often

I've been following Jeff's career since like...mid-Kinnporsche airing, I don't remember exactly when but like he had the first 3 songs from his new chapter phase. And honestly, I'm really proud of the guy, like from the cutesy songs he started with to working on a well-defined style and universe, to his now international stardom...Congrats!!

I'm also wondering about the album since he said there was 12 songs, (and we're missing single 9) and Stranger might be released inside the album but there's at least 1-2 new songs. He basically gave himself the opportunity to promote for a long-ass time with all these MVs (and thanks the sponsorships+the money he made for this clip budget) but that also means very little new songs. Like for album 2, is it going to be a mini-album? Or a normal-sized one? Is he going to go the one MV one song way again?

I don't know how thaï music industry works but it's going to be interesting. I hope there's Covid precautions in place at his concerts because I would hate for him to have his career shortened that way. Like fans, please wear masks. I wanna hear the high notes, and he's basically set himself up by having one high note per song (no, you don't need it Jeff) and that makes it hard to not to have public, embarassing false notes (is it how you say it in English? I'm French btw)

The studio posting in advance the Cartier Paris event schedule is funny, I've visited the museum and it's absolutely a visit during opening hours on a normal opening day. They probably privatized it with lots of money, but if they don't it's gonna be funny to see random art students going "who's that guy/why is there so many celebs??"(Paris museums are either closed on Monday or Tuesday, depending if they're state museums or city museums)

He's made quite a lot of connections last year, going from the first partnerships (the cat food one was mandatory) to high-end partnerships with luxury brands. I would love to know what made him choose these ones and reject the others but we will never know what has he been offered.

Also, Chuang! Except for one of the mentors I didn't know, it feels weird to see people I've seen being rookies listening to seniors becoming the judges of today, when the judges used to be people who weren't known celebrities to the idol fan watcher. Now my idols are another idol's idol! Like I'm going to watch a show (on and off because I'm busy) because of the judges and not the contestants! In terms of the competition, I wonder how they're going to be promoted, especially since it's a girl group. Like, when Produce/Chuang was created, it looked unrealistic, and here we are! I think the girls version of the show tends to be the first, and idol girls seem less "guaranted success" than the nth boygroup. Idk about thai music industry again, so idk how idols survive, because the only idol girls I kow in Thaïland are Sizzy from GMM..We'll see, but I hope the show fulfills its role of career launcher without scandals or evil editing.

Back to the actual topic, seeing the Jeff pyjama pic for the show's filming is making me wonder if he's going to be styled in Valention the whole time. If it's the case, we could literaly have a guessing party before the episode teasers, though he's a wild card since he picks women's clothes too. Please show, make him wear a skirt! A pantaskirt?

Also, his haircut, an actual discussion topic (but kpop idols announce comebacks by hair colour, so why not?) is making him look like he's somewhere between 18-22. Like it's only when he styles it back that it doesn't give him too much of a baby face. For his movie, I think they're filming backwards or not in order in terms of time period, because I don't think they're going to do bald cap if he needs to have no hair. We might get short military-like (I hope he doesn't keep it, I love the long hair). But also, is it me or he's started working out the Dorito back way? Like, he's got more arm and shoulder muscles than without workout, but last singing appearance he really looked "guy who works out to have a triangular back" and that may be movie-related as well? Again and again, idk.

I don't really write about stuff a lot, the thoughts often stay in my head, but yeah, here they are!

For his next career moves, I'm mostly curious about how much space he's going to give to acting or being in reality shows, since he's a singer first. I think Wuju is going to be his last work with Barcode as a partner, but I'm curious about where he's going to be casted if he does series again, like he has more options than just the BOC productions (unlike Barcode) and he may become a "pass-around, no fixed ship actor. But we're making plans on a comet now, and I really should go back to working, so bye for now!

[lapinlobotomy]

My Lesbian Epiphany

below the cut is a personal narrative about my experience realizing i'm a nonbinary lesbian, written for my college English credit course. from my instructor's positive feedback, i thought i would share it with the world somehow.

An average day of second grade was passing by quickly. I came home from school, zipped through my homework, and planted myself in front of the television. Remote in hand, I cycled through my channels of choice. Nothing new on Nickelodeon, nor anything interesting on Cartoon Network. In a last-ditch effort, I switched to the Disney Channel.

That’s when I saw her. Nested in a typical episode of Wizards of Waverly Place, a teen girl with beautiful, shoulder-length hair blazed with a blonde streak in her side-swept fringe tendrils. Her outfit, her accessories, her “cool rebel girl” attitude! I couldn’t help but lean in closer, entranced. With this character, named Stevie, I could not question it: I was attracted to other girls.

There were various other signs to come, for example, in middle school. On a day I was sporting a tank top that didn’t quite fit me, I walked the regular route to my next class with a classmate. She took notice of what I was wearing, with my bra exposed, and decided to comment.

“Luring in the boys, huh,  ◼◼◼◼◼?”

I neglected a response, mainly out of sheer confusion and discomfort in this attention drawn to my body. The conversation faded awkwardly by the time I arrived at my awaiting classroom. Before entering, I peered around the hall of students, routinely seeking any sign of the cute girl that dominated my school day thoughts.

Inevitably, high school rolled around. Ninth grade began how my eighth grade ended, mute, panicked, and constantly overwhelmed. However, something was on the horizon. That fall, I was introduced to an artist online who became enamored with me shortly after becoming friends. A month later, we were officially dating. He was a transgender man named Noel; his name chosen himself based on a character of a game we bonded over. Noel spoke with kindness and gentleness between his staple jokes. He confided in me his own journey of healing from his traumatic childhood experiences and even told me, “You can heal, too. I’ll be by your side for this process.”

 Is this…how it feels to be cared about? To actually feel loved by another person?  

A warm sensation fluttered in my chest. A feeling of safety amidst the boiling storm that was my first day at my new Youth Therapy Day Program. In awe of this tender young man, I felt a spark. A lit match to pass the flame to my Rube-Goldberg machine of candles. I don’t have to be what’s been pushed on me. I don’t have to be that girl, nor a girl at all!

I trekked through my first three years of high school under my new identity as a transmasculine nonbinary bisexual. It was a backpack of textbooks taken off my aching shoulders. However, by junior year, something started to worm back into my mind and fester. Suddenly, walking through the halls of my high school became a warzone for my soft, girl-adoring self. The sway of bobbed hair on one girl, fluttering eyelashes bordering crystalline eyes of another. Every girl I would see was gorgeous, my poor heart was skipping beats every day for a week.

Skeptical, I posed myself a question. Well, what about that boy over there, with the short hair? My mindscape would pause, before lighting up and melting over the idea of a girl with that exact haircut. Blushing at the thought of this made-up person, I was in dire need of what I call, a lesbian epiphany. Between assignments, I couldn’t help but think, what’s wrong with me? Girls are so pretty, I can’t stop staring but…I can’t be a lesbian, I get angry when people call me my birthname. Being called “she” makes my skin crawl.

Do… any lesbians feel like this, too?

I labored over these thoughts until I dashed straight to Tumblr, seeking validation for my identity and pure curiosity. Clicking past the artwork of the sapphic couples I longed to be, I typed “nonbinary lesbian” into the search bar and pressed the return key. Sure enough, there were numerous lesbians sharing experiences, just like mine. Lesbians using “he,” “they,” and even new, custom pronouns. Lesbians with chosen names. Lesbians who experience gender dysphoria and even transition.

“Oh… Oh my god.”

Something deep within me clicked. It’s possible. It’s allowed.

“Oh god, this is it! I’m a lesbian!” I could only whisper it, but had I been home alone and uninhibited, I would’ve screamed it out. I would’ve yelled it as loud as my vocal cords would permit me. Truly, that’s the essence of a lesbian epiphany.

It’s been three years now since I realized I was a lesbian. Despite new struggles, I never knew how comforting that single label could be. I would’ve never accepted this part of me, had I stayed within the scope of what representation lesbians got in common media. Even Stevie, my awakening, was written to be in a relationship with her media’s female protagonist, yet only allowed in subtext and disclosed after the fact.

Even Noel, the assured, clement transgender man, had his epiphany, just like me. In fact, he experienced the same fascinations and realization that I did, within a year of each other. I know two other gender diverse lesbians who reached the same destination, now flourishing with their queer partners in the paradise of lesbianism. That’s a joke, of course. Truly, there’s no one true way to be a lesbian. Every person under this label is different, and there’s no reason to change that. The disclosure of raw, personal stories is the key to my own journey, my lesbian epiphany.