#shooting a child in the chest? sign me tf up
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everwalldigan · 4 months ago
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It is actually HILARIOUS to me how different Dick and Jason’s coping mechanisms are😭 like I’m reading battle for the cowl and the sheer polarising reactions to Bruce’s death are giving me whiplash.
Dick, just lost his second father figure, youngest brother almost got killed by his crazed brother, his third brother going out dressed like 80s Batman, Gotham city falling apart at the seams, literally burning to the ground: this is fine
Jason: IM GONNA FUCKING KILL ALL OF YOU
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serendipitous-magic · 4 years ago
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Luke and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad 72 Hours
Imagine you’re a 19 year old working on a farm, and one day you buy some new animals from traveling merchants to help out around the farm - let’s say a goat and an ostrich. You’re cleaning them and getting them ready to work when you notice that the goat has a message tied around its neck. It sounds like the message might be intended for the kooky old guy who lives by himself out in the wilderness. You’ve met the guy a few times, you might even consider him a friend, but he’s mostly a mystery. You ask your uncle if he knows anything about it, but first he denies any knowledge and then he says the intended recipient of the message knew your dead father, and then he abruptly tells you to forget all about it.
Okay, weird???
That night, the goat runs away. The ostrich is freaking out about it. You go after it with the ostrich the next morning and find it making its way towards the old hermit’s house, but you’re attacked by a local gang and knocked tf out. When you wake up, the old hermit is there, and he takes you back to his place and drops the bomb on you that apparently your dead dad wasn’t who your family told you he was?? Apparently he wasn’t a navigator on a fishing boat, he was a pilot and a samurai warrior, and he was fucking murked by his samurai buddy??? And while that earth-shattering revelation is still fresh in your mind, Hermit Dude reads the rest of the Goat Message. Apparently it’s from a princess, and she’s asking Hermit Dude for help in a massive civil war that’s been going on. She says this goat is a Very Important Goat, and it’s carrying information that’s essential to the war effort that could restore prosperity to the entire world.
Hermit Dude then immediately sits back, looks you in the eye and without preamble says, “You’re going to have to learn how to be a samurai warrior if you’re gonna come with me to the big city and help this chick and save the war effort.” And you’re like “??? learn?? to be a samurai?? Big city?? What in the frick frack paddywack are you babbling about? Listen dude I got shit to do, I can’t just go off on this wild goat chase. But look, if it means so much to you I’ll give you a lift to the nearest town so you can go on your own.”
But on the way to town, you come across those traveling merchants you bought the goat and ostrich from - all dead, their caravan trashed. “This wasn’t the gang,” Hermit Dude says, “The government did this, and made it look like it was gang activity. They were looking for your Goat Message.” You race back home, only to find the smoldering remains of your farm, and the charred skeletons of your family laid out on the doorstep.
With nothing to do, nowhere else to call home, and a newfound revenge-driven fury in your chest, you return to Hermit Dude and say, “Make me a samurai like my apparently-murdered father, yo-yo master Hermit Dude. I’ll go help the war effort with you like the princess asked.”
So you all head off to this shady-ass small town run by crime lords. The government is already there, looking for the goat, and Hermit Dude hypnotizes these two military guys like it’s no big deal, sooooo apparently he can just do that? Okay, neat, neat, neat. Hermit Dude then chops somebody’s fucking arm off right in front of you in a bar fight (what the fuck), and long story short you end up selling your car so you can hitch a clandestine ride to the Big City in this fast-talking cowboy’s RV, which looks like it’s held together with spit and duct tape. Cowboy Guy’s best friend is this 7-foot-tall dude with so much hair and beard that he could probably hide weapons in it. The military arrives and you barely make it out of the parking garage, and you end up in a fucking car chase before you make it to the highway and get the hell outta dodge.
BUT THEN you finally arrive at the Big City, and it’s gone. There’s nothing there, just the ruined wasteland of nuclear rubble where the government dropped the bomb (which by the way was JUST invented). And as far as you know that’s??? Never happened before?? So, that’s terrifying. (Also keep in mind your home was razed and your family was brutally murdered like less than 24 hours ago so THAT’S still fresh.)
There’s one little government truck that sees you and takes off. Cowboy is like “Let’s shoot their tires out before they go report to somebody,” but there isn’t anybody around to report to. EXCEPT FOR THE CITY-SIZED BATTLE STATION ON WHEELS THAT ABDUCTS YOU, RV AND ALL. What the fuck is this? Since when did this exist??? They pull the RV into their parking garage, but you hide under the floor panels, surprise-attack some soldiers and steal their uniforms. You sneak into a control room, hoping to shut down the station’s power and escape, but while Hermit Dude goes to cut some power cords, you notice some records lying around. And, hey, what’s this? The princess that wrote the Goat Message? She’s here on Massive Battle Station? SCHEDULED TO BE EXECUTED??? Well, of course you can’t let that happen! Cowboy is grumpy about it but you manage to convince him.
Using your military disguises, you manage to find and save the princess from her cell, almost get crushed to death in a trash compactor while escaping from the prison section, and arrive back at the parking garage pursued by hordes of soldiers - only to witness Hermit Dude, your only remaining link to your home and your old life, get sliced in actual half right in front of you. 
There’s another one for Trauma Bingo!
(P.S. you’ve also now killed several government soldiers in your escape. You’ve now killed people. You’re a killer.)
You manage to escape in the Duct Tape RV with Cowboy, Beard, Princess, Ostrich and Goat, but you’re followed by some government cars. You climb up on the roof to engage in an at-speed shootout with them, because after the last 36 hours, this is the least weird thing you’ve done. Firefight with government forces? Yeah, sure, what the hell. No big deal, honestly.
So now not only are you family-less and homeless, but you’re DEFINITELY on some sort of government list of known criminals. Guess there’s no going back now; you’re part of the rebels whether you want to be or not! Thankfully you’ve still got that grief-driven justice quest going on, doubly compounded by witnessing the murder of your mentor.
The RV makes it to the secret base where the rebels have been hiding. The Very Important Goat is finally delivered, and it coughs up plans for the gigantic battle station. So far, so good. Except, curses! The government tracked you here! Looks like the fight happens now. Game on, jackass government. Game on. “That’s impossible!” cries one pilot, to which you reply, “Nah, I basically did it all the time back home.” You sign up to fight: a pilot, like your dead samurai dad. 
Why was a 19 year old civilian with some bush-plane experience (??) allowed to sign up to fly a fighter plane? We’ll never know.
Also, the goat comes on the plane with you.
Cowboy collects his payment and takes off, which you’re not happy about, but at least you’re reunited with your BFF from back home. So at least you have one single connection to home left.
Until he dies. RIP.
You try blowing up the Enormous Battle Station the normal way, but the disembodied spirit of Hermit Dude appears in your head and tells you to use your Magical Samurai Powers. You do, and succeed in blowing up the Big-Ass Battle Station just as Cowboy arrives again to take out the Big Baddie who killed Hermit Dude. The Traveling Nuke Factory is destroyed, the evil government has taken a big blow, and you get a shiny medal in a ceremony with your new friends.
So, let’s recap. In the last, oh, 2.5 days or so, you’ve gone from living your everyday life to seeing everything you know and love destroyed, to becoming a traitor to the evil government and a rebel, to fighting in (and winning) an intense military battle thanks to your fledgling Magic Powers, to now being the poster child of the rebellion.
You need therapy.
But at least the goat’s okay.
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ccatvalentine · 4 years ago
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murder house | pilot
introduction
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Season 1 - Murder House 
Episode 1 - Pilot
word count: 2,438
1978 
Far above , the branches twisted like distorted limbs reaching out. The forboding tree reaching out towards you. The open gates, showcasing a gnarled, old looking- house and a young girl standing  on the front lawn
CRASH! A sound crashes as someone throws a rock at the window of an abandoned house and shatters it. 
Bryan jokes “Hey, Troy. You're a dork.”
“Hey, shut up. Hey, freak.” Troy insults.
On Bryan’s way to the front door, Bryan blows some kisses at Addie who stares back at him, keeping a straight face.
“Excuse me. You are going to die in there.” the mysterious girl warns.
 “Shut your mouth, or we're gonna kick your ass!” Troy says,angry at the girl.
Bryan “We got bats.”
Troy moans “I hate trees!”
As they enter the house, Addie chants “You're gonna regret it. You're gonna regret it. You're gonna regret it.”
Troy “Yeah!”
Bryan “Yeah!”
The boys smash everything inside of the house with their bats.
 “Troy” Bryan says he looks at the door.
 “Awesome, go,” Troy forced.
“No, you go, shithead.” Bryan says, not wanting to go first.
The boys go down the stairs, not knowing the dangers that they are about to face.
 “Check it out." Troy pushed.
They find a room full of jars filled with human's and animal's parts. Troy picks up a jar containing an ear and drops it. As a result, it shatters onto the ground.
“It stinks in here. It stinks like shit. You remember last summer when we get the raccoon stuck in our chimney? That's what it smells like. Let's go find it.” Troy says, disgusted.
“No, it smells bad... I'm getting out of here.” Bryan says.
Troy goes further into the room, poping his crackers, while Bryan turns around, up the stairs. Suddenly, the popping stops. Bryan stops his ascension.
 "Troy? " Bryan questions.
(A bottle rolls across floor)
 "Troy? Who's down there? Cut it out, Troy. Cut it out." Bryan asks again, scared. 
 Bryan finds Troy on the ground, his throat slashed while Troy is reaching out to him, unable to utter anything. Suddenly, Bryan turns around and sees a terrifying creature called the infantata, running in their direction.
As a result, Bryan starts screaming bloody murder as Addy simply stars back at the house.
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
18th July 2011
Ugh this is soooo boring, I don't know why my parents aren't divorced already, whatever, it's not like I care. 
 "Mommmm are we there yet?" I complain.
 " We'll be there soon honey. " mom says looking at me from the mirror thing.
Vivien : The light is different out here. It's softer.
Violet : It's called smog.
Ben : You should be excited, Vi. You can stop sneaking cigarettes and just start taking deep breaths.
Violet : I need to go to the bathroom.
Ben : We're almost there.
Violet : I need to go.
Ben : Vi, it's a freeway. Really, where do you want me to pull over? Maybe the Honda next to us has a bathroom or something.
Violet : Bet if the baby had  to piss , you'd find somewhere.
 "Hey! Don't call me a baby!" I pouted.
Vivien : Really? Violet, I hate that word, unless I'm saying it.
Ben : I'm really glad we named you Violet, instead of our second choice. Same with you Eve.
Violet : Which was?
Vivien : Sunshine.
"lol, cringe." Violet shoots me a ' wtf' look.
Ben : It's funny. Come on, you gotta admit it's funny.
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
Currently, we’re at the front of our brand new house and dad is ringing the doorbell.
Ben : I love it. Don't you love it, hon? I mean, it looks even better than it did online.
Vivien : Yeah, it's interesting.
“How about you Evelyn?” Dad asks me.
“I think it’s cool and superrr creepy. :) it’s totally haunted!” I beam while Violet keeps on thinking, ‘why does my sister have to be so creepy?’
Violet : Great. So we're the Addams Family now.
Ben : Hey, crabby pants. Come here.
Vivien : What are you doing?
Ben : Isn't this place amazing?
Suddenly, I see an old looking lady open the door.
Marcy : Welcome. It's a classic L.A. Victorian. Built around 1920 by the doctor to the stars at the time. It's just fabulous. These are real Tiffany fixtures. As you can see, the previous owners really loved this place like a child. They restored everything.
‘Tiffany, in that super cool famous store I see big celebrities like Lady Gaga buy and wear???!’ I think, amazed.
Vivian: Gay?
Marcy : What do you think?
Ben : Tiffany. Wow.
Marcy : Do you cook?
Ben : Viv is a great cook. I got her cooking lessons a few years ago, and she ended up teaching the teacher a few things.
Marcy : Cooking lessons... romantic. Aren't you a psychologist?
Ben : Psychiatrist. You said something on the phone about there being a study that I could use as a home office? I'm planning on seeing patients here, so I can spend more time with the family.
‘That’s kinda cool I guess : I wont have to deal with seeing the patients every day. Privacy, at last.’ I smile, happy at the idea.
Marcy : How refreshing.
(Vivien puts her dog down, and it goes running outside the kitchen, yapping)
Vivien : Violet, honey, would you go see where Hayley we-nt? Oh, never mind. Eve, try not to trip sweetheart!
“Hey fluffy, what’s wrong?” her eyes widen (she just came up with this) “I know! It’s ghost... spooky. 😃” Whoever the ghost was, decided to prank her by tapping her on the head lightly. “ Aaahhhh!!!” she screamed while running into her mothers chest while her mother was confused. Nevertheless, she’s pulled her daughter into a hug. “Mom! This shits haunted, so cool!”
Violet was used to this, username to her sister being obsessed and fascinated with scary things. Violet signed and went up to the dog,” What are you yapping at?”
That was soooo epic! Finally, I get to feel a ghost!!😊😃😀 im watching as the loser attempts to open a random creepy door, oh she’s done it, finalllly. I see her go in a bit and peek inside while she goes down the stairs. it's dark and creepy but whatever cool I guess.
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
I was walking back to the living room?? area. 
Vivien : This wallpaper is peeling over here. Looks like maybe there's a mural underneath it.
Marcy : The last owners probably covered it up. They were modernists. Speaking of the last owners, full disclosure requires that I tell you about what happened to them.
‘Wait?! something happenedddd???’
Vivien : Oh, God... they didn't die in here or anything, did they?
Marcy : Yes, actually, both of them. Murder-suicide. I sold them the house, too. They were just the sweetest couple. You never know, I guess.
‘omgggggg ghostsss!!!! i called it! 😉’
Ben : That explains why it's half the price of every other house in the neighborhood, I guess.
Marcy : I do have a very nice mid-century ranch, but it's in the Valley, and you're going to get a third of the house for twice the price.
Ben : Right.
Violet : Where did it happen?
Marcy : The basement. 
Violet : We'll take it.
‘:) operation find ghosts!’
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
Ben: Come on, babe, let's go to bed. Leave that for the morning.
Vivien : I'm a little bit worried about Violet, you know, these kids here are very different. I don't know if she can handle another year of not fitting in. Same with Evelyn, her friends at her old school weren’t a great influence on her.
Ben : You mean... you can't?
Vivien : Can't believe this place doesn't freak you out a little bit. 'Cause of what happened here?
Ben : My repulsion is tempered by the fact that this house is worth four times what we paid for it, so let's not think about it.
Vivien : This is your professional advice, Doctor, just denial?
Ben : Come on, let me give you a little love. Moving here, buying this house was the exact right thing to do for us and our family. It's a good thing and we deserve some good after all the shit we've been through.
Vivien : I've got some stuff I want to... unpack down in the kitchen. I appreciate that you're trying. I'm trying, too.
Ben : Okay.
Vivien : It's just gonna take some time.
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
Currently, I’m at the campus of my new middle school. I see a group of bitchy-looking girls out front.
Maria : Hey! Student council passed a rule against blowing bubblegum.
Katy : yeah, you could choke on it.
‘tf okay karen.’
“I'm new, I didn't know, sorry.” i roll my eyes.
Maria : What the hell is wrong with you? People sit here, they eat here.
“You don't know me. Why are you doing this?”
Katy : Maria's grandmother died from choking on gum, she takes this pretty seriously.
Maria : Eat it... eat it or I'm gonna kick the shit out of you.
“No. What?”
Cathy : Come on, , that's enough.
Maria : No, no, no, I want to see her eat it.
“No. No.”
Maria : Eat it, eat it.
Katy : Maria, seriously, she's like 10.
Maria tries to force me to eat the gum, but I take the gum out of my mouth and place it on Maria’s head. Maria screams.
Maria : You are dead! You are dead!
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
Currently, I’m peaking, leaning around the corner of my sister’s door.
Tate : This one I did after my dad left. I was ten, I think.
‘Who’s this?’
Violet : Last week, first day at my new school... sucks.
‘Ouch, that looks like it hurts.’
Tate : Westfield, right? The worst. I got thrown out of there.
Violet : I hate it here. I hate everyone. All there bourgeoisy designer bullshit. East Coast was much cooler. I mean, at least we had weather.
Tate : I love it when the leaves change.
Violet : Yeah, me, too.
Tate : Why did you move here?
Violet : My dad had an affair. My mom literally caught him in the act.
‘Yeah, why don’t they divorce then????!!‘ I acidentally slipped as i had been leaning into the door to much. oof
Violet: what are you doing here? wait, were u listening in on our conversation?!
“err, maybe?”
Tate: Who’s this?
“I’m Evelyn, Violet’s better sister, epic ghost hunter😼😎“
Tate smiles lightly, violet says, “whatever, come here.” she puts me on her lap while they carry on their conversatio 
Tate : That's horrible. If you love someone, you should never hurt them... never.
Violet : Right? I know. And the worst part is that six months earlier, my mom had, like, this brutal miscarriage. The baby was seven months old, and we had to have this macabre funeral. Have you ever seen a baby coffin?
Tate sits near Violet and gently touches her wrist.
Tate : I'm sorry.
Violet : Why are you seeing my dad?
Tate : Don't ask questions you already know the answer to. You're smarter than that.
Violet : Want to listen to Morrissey? He's cool and he's pissy and he hates everyone and everything.
Tate : Got any Kurt Cobain on that thing?
Ben : What are you doing in here?
I turn my head around and see dad by the door
Violet : Just listening to music, Dad.
Ben : You need to leave, Tate. I'm sorry. He shouldn't be in here, and I think you know that... please.
Tate : What's that thing you think I'm afraid of? Fear of rejection?
Ben : Stay away from him.
Violet : Dad, nothing...
Ben : You heard me!
Tate : No! Bullet, bullet, bullet!
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
im in the kitchen with mom eating some sweets and i see a women and a girl.
Vivien : I want you to stay out of my house.  Do you understand?
Constance : Can I smoke in here?
Vivien : No. Adelaide, answer me, please.
Addie : Can I pet your dog?
Vivien : No, Adelaide, I want you to stay out of the house. I want you to stop coming in and opening things up and telling me that I'm going to die.
Ben : She said that?
Constance : She says that to everybody. Say you're sorry, Addie.
Addie : No, they did it.
Vivien : Who did it?
Addie : The twins.
Constance : Shh.
Addie : Can I... pet your dog?
Vivien : No, Adelaide, listen to me. I want you to stop coming in here without permission. Am I clear?’
I wisper to mom, ‘why does she always come in the house, i can hear her a lot.’ mom just shrugs
Ben : Vivien.
Vivien : Am I clear?
Addie : Yes.
Vivien : Thank you.
Constance : Time to go, Addie.
Ben : Hallie!
Vivien : Are you okay?
Addie : She shouldn't have done that.
Constance : Sorry about all this. You touch my kid one more time and I will break your goddamn arm.
‘awkward, now thats a TRUE karen’
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
im at school and this bitch is trying to fucking fight me
Violet : I'm not scared of you!
Maria : Should be!
Kids : Fight, fight, fight!
i spit 
Maria: little bitch!
‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ・❉・ ʚ˚̣̣̣͙ɞ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵ ‿︵‿︵
Vivien : Hey. Whoa. Come here. What happened to your face?
“Fell down.”
Vivien : Come here. Sit, sit, sit. Boy or girl?
“Girls. Three of em.””
Vivien : Hope they look worse than you do. You know their names?
“I'm not narking.”
Vivien : You know, we can easily move you to a different school. There are a lot of really good private schools right in this neighborhood.
“I'm not running away. I'm not scared of them. Not afraid of anything.”
Vivien : It's like that time in kindergarten, when you insisted that I bring you home from the slumber party 'cause all the other girls were sleeping without the nightlight on. I know you've gotten the short end of the stick, lately. This move, and...your dad and I haven't exactly been great to be around.
 “Why don't you guys get divorced, if you're so miserable?”
Vivien : We still love each other.
“ You could've fooled me. I thought you hated each other. Well, at least you hated him. I don't blame you. He was a shithead. Sorry.”
Vivien : It's okay. He was a shithead. You know, we got a lot of history. Your dad's been through a lot, I've been through a lot. Guess we need each other. What are you scared of?
“You said I'm not scared of anything, so... what scares you?”
Vivien : Lately? Everything. Life will do that to you.
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mccoys-killer-queen · 3 years ago
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get ready for 13 year old Rachel to be unleashed
this intro music and Windows 95 looking logo eUGGHHHH
it was a dark day the day CGI met Doctor Who
"Stored his remains safely" in a fucking box
THIS IS THE SUPERIOR TARDIS DESIGN DON'T @ ME
Sylvester McCoy, my beloved
me, when the Master's life...goop (?) squirmed away: 🎶 this is my cum, this is my cum🎶
Chang Lee, my beloved
*fires gun multiple times at someone* WHERE YOU GOIN MAN COME BACK HERE, WIMP
thank god the TARDIS appeared in front of Lee ;∆; the child didn't deserve to die
the Doctor: ah yes, San Francisco : ) what a lovely- *gets shot*
"amazing Grace", my beloved
Grace operating while in her opera dress and listening to opera while operating? what a queen
I can't believe this EMT guy deep throated the Master
the Frankenstein parallel is 👌👌
PAUL MCGANN, MY BELOVED
i just want to give Eight a hug so bad i mean the poor bean is traumatized and he was just born DD; HE'S *SHAKING* HE'S IN PAIN AND HE'S CRYING AND HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT HE IS OR WHERE HE IS HE'S SO HELPLESS I JUST WANNA HOLD HIM ;∆;
what kind of hospital just has an abandoned flooded wing like this
he looks like Jesus
WHO AYUM EYEEE3AAAAAA
*chefs kiss*
oh god look at how 90s this is eUGgH
the fuckin scarf damqllflflejwklg
Lee: *holds sonic we l right up to his eye* e_e
Eight: i know who i am. i belong in a western.
"I need the Doctor's body" there's literally no vanilla explanation for that
this guy's wife spent her last seconds being horny what a queen
"WHAT MAYBE HE WENT TO A BETTER HOSPITAL?????" CRACKS ME UP EVER FUXOING TIMEMRKFLEL
"if you'll do this, I'll quit." "you don't mean that" "well golly fucking jee looks like I'm quitting"
so the Doctor's telepathic apparently and doesn't need to touch anyone to read their past?
Eight is so fucking metal he just pulled the probe out of his fucking chest
Master is also metal just peeling his fingernails completely off
"it was so sadddd D;" "yOu hAVe tWO heArTS"
"you're trying to tell me you came back from the dead?" "yes :D"
Lee did not sign up for this shit
how the FUCK did the Master get in the TARDIS
"the TARDIS really likes you" that's bc she's going "ahahahahaha send help :3D"
"THESE SHOES!!! :D THEY FIT PERFECTLY!!!!! :D"
Eight is literally the himbo of all of the Doctors don't @ me
remember that time the Doctor kissed the person who killed him? NO I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT ROSE Grace did it first
once again confirming that the Doctor can feel when the TARDIS is in pain and vice versa (as seen in Born Again)
Grace ditching him wjqklepflthl
"i thought you were a doctor!!" "I THOUGHT YOU'RE A DOCTOR?????"
"as WELL as you" stfu master omfg
he can spit acid....? e_e
chickens
"now would you stand aside before i shoot myself? :D"
the fact that he was seriously about to shoot himself proves that he's the himbo
Grace went from cardiologist to unemployed and threatening a cop with a gun within 24 hours what a queen
"yes. we're a... team -_-"
"I ONLY HAVE ONE LIFE. CAN YOU REMEMBER THAT???"
"why don't you have the ability to transform yourself into another species?" "well I do but it's only when I die"
"I'm half human on my mother's side" see this was clearly a fucking lie, he said it as a joke- he regenerated into half human
the fuckin jelly babies amaldocprpg
*pulls fire alarm to liven things up*
headcannon: Grace gets Eight to drink with her but he can't even handle one
feral Grace, cursed Grace
"i always dress for the occasion" 🙄
*kisses Lee's head* "oH PLeaSe"
BONDAGE TIIIIIIIIIMEEE 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
THAT FUCKIN DISGUSTING GROSS ASS KISS
the Master orgasming for three minutes straight bc he can "feel the Doctor's mind"
Doctor, while in bondage: Master...
Doctor: *weak ass kicks Master into wall*
Why is his voice suddenly Darth Vader mixed with Jabba
1- how tf did the Master survive EXTERMINATION WITH NO REGENERATIONS LEFT
2- how tf did the Master survive GETTING SUCKED INTO THE EYE OF HARMONY AND HOW DID HE END UP AS PROFESSOR YANA
why are there crushed up leaves on the floors deep in the TARDIS
"where's the Master?" "...indigestion."
*smacks TARDIS* this bad boy can swallow so many Masters
the stoic security guard rnlepgpgt
I thought the other news lady said she was going to be at the clock at midnight but she's still on the news? dlaleogpgph
"come with me" "YOU come with ME"
I love the Doctor/Grace relationship and we need more of it
"thank you, Doctor :3" "no thank YOU, doctor :3" they're so cute make them stop
I make an effort to watch this movie once every year and I'm never disappointed I loved this movie from the first time I saw it pirated on YouTube in 2014
happy 25th anniversary Doctor Who (1996) you're a freak of nature and I love you
also the main menu on the DVD is basically just a loop of him screaming
okay guys I'm super excited to announce that I am going to be watching the shittily charming Doctor Who movie from 1996 tonight I can't wait
Eight is my fav along with Twelve
I've had this DVD since 2015 and I haven't watched the movie in at least 2 years let's fuckin GOOOOOOOOOO
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stanmxm · 7 years ago
Text
im youngmin as a prince
this is my first time doing this bear with me please-- it’s also hellaaa long so i put it under the cut to save those who dont want to scroll past the whole thing lol
is highly highly highly respected and loved by everyone in his kingdom
hes so sweet to all his people like he’ll go out of his way to check on them and make sure they’re all doing well bc he loves his kingdom so much
even sent christmas cards and extra food to all the households in the town during the holidays like WHAT A SWEETHEART
anyways
he loves his kingdom so deeply you can imagine how on edge he becomes when his dad is suddenly ill and about to pass
bc now it’s time for youngmin to step in as king and like?? he’s nOT READY
but he can’t let his kingdom NOT have a king like his people need a leader-- and his mother bless her but she doesn’t really have leadership skills rip so youngmin is their only hope
BUT he’s not married.. he can barely talk to girls lmao but it’s against royal law (?) to become a king without a queen so
that’s where you come in
your family is more into the whole “TAKE ALL THE POWER” part of royalty so they really really want to take some control of as many kingdoms as possible
but brand new kingdom (SHOOT ME) (that’s youngmin’s kingdom btw) is way too big and powerful to overtake so what better way to gain some power than to give away their daughter aka you amirite
word gets around pretty fast that youngmin is looking for a wife so they ship you off HELLA QUICK LIKE YOU’RE OFF ON A HORSE BEFORE U CAN BLINK THEY’RE WAVING AND SHIT LIKE “GO GET U THAT MAN BRING US BACK A RICH POWERFUL HEIR”
ur mad the whole way there like tf what if you don’t like youngmin he could be an asshole
needless to say that when you get there he is in fact an asshole lol
there are a bunch of girls there tryna marry him i dont blame them like bitch sign me up and he just lines them up and is scanning them up and down
and ur like??? until he stops and says “mary’s dad has four children, three of them are named monday, tuesday, and wednesday; what’s the fourth child’s name?”
and now ur like ??????? wtf is he doing
until some girl on the opposite end of u yells all confidently with a really loud voice “thursday!!” and you just
you try to keep ur mouth shut and be nice but you just
“dumbass the fourth child is mary”
you realize that you swore and it was hella disrespectful so you open your mouth to apologize until
“find her a dress. i’m marrying that one.” youngmin points straight to you and says before walking out and you’re like wHAT
within a few days all your stuff is unpacked (into your own room bc youngmin wont let you near his) and you’ve had a wedding and get settled in as the new queen of brand new kingdom
all the while youngmin hasn’t said word to you? the only thing that you’ve heard leave his mouth since you were chosen was “i do” and das it
a few weeks pass and still, nothing from youngmin. the most he gives you is glares as you pass each other and requests for you to sign documents regarding the kingdom and stuff
but in the meantime you have gotten to know his mother who LOVES you and catches you up on the kingdom, how things work, what the people are like, and she even gave you a tour of the town once so you could meet everyone
you want to ask her some things about youngmin but figure it’s not your place.. so you go to the people instead LMAO
you visit a few families and shops and they all say the same thing: that youngmin is extremely sweet and warmhearted and that they’re all so blessed to have him as their king
you’re just like?? we’re talking abt the same youngmin right lol
one day you visit this little old lady’s florist shop in the corner of town and speak with her a little bit
she tells you that since spring season just started, you should prob look out a bit for youngmin bc his allergies start acting up then hands you a bouquet of periwinkle flowers and says
“these are his favorite and they don’t make him sick, can you give them to him for me and tell him to take care of himself? he must be awfully tired”
YOUR HEART IS CRYING OF COURSE YOU GOTTA GO GIVE HIM THE FLOWERS FOR THE CUTE ELDERLY LADY
that night you reluctantly go to youngmin’s office
you creek the door open just a bit to see him tugging at his hair as he looks over paperwork, obviously stressed over something
you clear your throat and knock on the door, causing youngmin to look up at you but he seems to just get more upset lol
“can i help you?” he has this really cold tone and ur like shit who put ur panties in a twist
“i visited mrs.kim this afternoon-”
“at the florist shop?”
“uh yeah, her, and she asked me to give these to you” you pull the flowers from behind the door and youngmin’s mood went 0 to 100 REAL QUICK
it’s like all the angry washed away from his face and his eyes just light up and he’s all smiley HE’S SO PRECIOUS
“periwinkles! those are my favorite- i can’t believe she remembered!” he happily stands and takes the flowers from you as you step into the middle of the room
“she asked me to tell you that you should take care of yourself” youre trying not to look him in the eye cause even tho he was being cute af you know he can be scary
youngmin’s smile starts to frown and now he’s pouting WHAT A CUTE BABY and he’s like “i haven’t visited her at all since i’ve become king. i haven’t visited ANY of my people”
he grabs one of the chairs closest to him and sits down, putting his head in his hands after setting the flowers on the table
youre kind of just standing there not knowing what to do until you hear sniffs and soft gasps and youre like omfg he’s crying
so you just awkwardly pat him on the back.. and say “do you.. wanna talk about it..”
turns out youngmin did wanna talk about it lmao he tells you how scared he is, says that he doesn’t want to fail his people and feels so stressed about everything
you tell him everything that he needed to hear: that all his people loved him and even if it meant that he couldn’t see them as often as he’d like he’s doing what’s best for everyone and according to the people you’ve talked to, he’s being a pretty amazing king
you end up being his listening ear after that-- he trusts in you more and talks to you when making decisions and at first you’re like? you really trust me with this
and he LAUGHS wow that was the first time you heard his laugh it was magical and he was like “i chose you because you weren’t stupid, remember?”
and you’re like OHHHH NOW IT MAKES SENSE
time passes and you and youngmin become closer.. it turns out that youngmin was being an asshole to you bc he truly believed that you should be in love before getting married, and felt that he was being cheated out of that bc of the whole situation
he was also kind of uncomfortable with u being apart of things because he didn’t know you that well so he didnt know if he trusted you BUT now you two are close and he needs you for every decision!!
one day after a long day of work and going over papers, you just so happen to fall asleep in youngmin’s office on the couch
and youngmin was trying to be considerate and everything right bc your bedroom was pretty far (it was really just a few halls down) but his was right there so why not
like
just take you to his room and cuddle you all night KJLFJKDFJKFD
needless to say you were surprised when you woke up in youngmin’s arms the next morning
happily surprised ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
after that you started “accidentally” falling asleep in his office more often
and youngmin would always “be considerate” and let you sleep in his bed
it came to a point where your maids got so sick of it that they packed up all ur shit for you and moved it into his room without you two knowing
at first yall were like “what?1!??1! no we totally aren’t living together!1!!1″
yall never tried to move your stuff out
it didn’t take long after that for youngmin to confess to you or for you to happily accept
sometime during your relationship you and youngmin get to spend a rare sunday afternoon in bed cuddling and just listening to each other’s heartbeats
until youngmin says “babe.. let’s get married”
and you snort and hold up your hand with your wedding ring
“youngmin, we ARE married”
your husband sits up and shakes his head, pulling you into his chest and leaning his head on yours
“i mean a real wedding where we can actually express how much we love each other without all the pressure and stuff for press. i just want to show everyone how much i truly love you”
GOODBYE I’M DYING HE’S THE CUTEST
before you know it there are wedding bells and you’re walking down the aisle wearing a dress you chose yourself this time and there’s your husband actually smiling at you with as much love as he can muster
the wedding goes amazing, your loved ones are all there to congratulate you two on being truly in love as well as the town to celebrate the greatest king and queen duo brand new kingdom has ever had
and there are lots, and lots, of periwinkles
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filmery · 7 years ago
Text
Stream of Consciousness
from Iron Man
****WATCH OUT FOR LOTS OF GRAMMATICAL ERRORS****
fav marvel opener- flipping comic book pages -never read any whoops
no one is wearing black- back in black
sexist- driver woman
rdj is =iron man
peace sign kid holds- he dies so thats why tony does peace sign
"older guy cant work camera" clishe
uggggh shaky camera
why was he with the troops/ not in helicopter?
zoom into bomb fast- GREAT fast comedic moment just before sadness
he shud not have been conscious after explosion that close
WTF IS THAT UNDER HIS SHIRT WTF- IFITS ARMOR IT SHULD PROTECT HIM
al quaeda to soon
so hes steve jobs- made a frikin computer in his garage
ewww rbj with no beard- bad cgi :( cant u just shave and get over urself?
yes weapons are the key to peace hahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHhahaha
rip terrence howard as rhody
"too cool for award" cliche
"bald guy is bad" cliche
"hes always working" uhhh besides a few montages.... no he really just parties
only talks to cute girls....... uggggh
military funding? ha more like military debt ahahahahah 20 trillion is iron mans fault
jarvis is wing man after one night stand???? idve thought hed think tony was cheating lol
"girl wakes up with just guys shirt" cliche
"guy wakes up and leaves before girl wakes up" cliche
cat fight ha+2 points
literal and figurative island haha
so tony aint smart, he just uses jarvis
he obvi doesnt know how t4he faa works
i was gonna get REAL mad if tony didnt buy a painting cuz it was "too expensive" but we good
tonys a dick
yet pepper finds him attractive
ksorry
yaaaas rhody calling him a baby cuz he FING IS
im pretty sure laser shows in airplanes are illegal
"im not drinking them gets drunk" cliche
in my opinion from what ive collected, you cant be feared AND respected. fear takes over and you do things based on fear, not fromrespect - also how will blowing up people help them respect you? unless youre talking about getting respect from those u protect and those u kill cuz thats completely differeent then
"i respectfully disagree" or do you "fearfully disagree"
starts out as all techno talk, then turns into baby talk wtf
that shock wave conviently stopped right after it hit them
montage of painful surgeyr cliche
ewww that pipe in his nose as groooooooss
"dont do that but dontexplain" cliche
the dude cant understand english how did he know that tony refused????
why tf wouldnt u test it ANYWHERE BUT THE MIDDLE EAST?????
why cant they just wait and order the missile
k so this scene is srs and all but WATCHING HIM CARRYING THE CAR BATTERY IS SOOOO FuNNY I CANT
"no he wont" OK NOW U CANT UNDERSTAND U POS
"theyll never find u" cliche
why is his friend here?
how does he know how to build it? tbh he probs just had jarvis do it back home
how does the gov not know hes selling weapons to terrorists? we cant be that corrupt can we?
so hes building his ring thing but they DONT FING NOTICE THATS THERES NO MISSILES AT AlL??????
and they didnt question them the entire time
lemme peek but not go in and investigate
"i have steady hands" and then he crashes his car and LOOK! Doctro strange!
when a speech starts with a history lesson, u know its been rehearsed u poser
honestly... hot coal in mouth- worst way to die fml
props to marvel for not telling how fast theyre moving so i cant bust them for not being able to get it done
why the circle around the chest thing
wouldt one of their rules to be able to see u at all times
ctrl i is italicize hahahaha
why did the lights shut off but no the clearly hookedup laptop?
i enjoy the rock music as background music- not ur stereotypical ( yet awesome) hans zimmer score
yaaaaaas bitches run
gun shootsthen rebounds onto him- pretty sure thats not how physics work
if anyone should die, its tony tbh that whiny bithc
-2 for killing an actual good guy
how does not one of those bullets penetrate his suit?
----not enough use of the word penetreate
k no theyd keep shooting
tony: everythings on fire and im dying
ouchie that giant fall
how does he know hose helis are good?
DONT TOUCH HIS SUNBURNT AND BLISTERING SHOULDERS RHODY EWWWW
+2 for cheeseburger yas
-2 for burger king ew
doesnt sheild deal with aliens not terrorists?
newsreels? hes not THAT old
+10000 for ACCOUNTABILITY AND RESPONSIBILTY WOOOOO
k hes obvi doing the best thing here and now everyone gets pissed for him TRYING TO SAVE PEOPLES LIVES EHY IS THAT BAD?????? HE ALREADY HAS a shit otn of money LET HIM BE
fuck u and ur segway obidiah
the other thing..... dont put ur name on it
jokes on u! it was alqueade
+100 for mad money reference!!!!!
...so pepper didnt know about it so whyd he blame her for .3 seconds?
pepper is useless omg PUT YOUR HANDS IN HIS CHEST
why did he say dont take out the magnet but all of a sudden u dont need it?
i wonder if they actually built robots for tonys btterfingers
rhodeys we need pilots speech was just proven again by the aircraft landing in the hudson
so non military= humanitarian now? and if so why that bad?
honestly surprised that jarvis isnt some hot lady voice
k raza with sunglasses= morpheus
why is the mask the most vital part for raza?
tony crashing into wall is why u should ALWAYS WEAR A HELMET KIDS
obadiah is NOT playing the piano
+2 for not trusting obidiah
daaaamn if thats 1% whats 100% capacity
and he still doesnt wear a helmet
k his eye holes are so small how can he actually see?
run before walking leads to lots of problems later in life tony
at leaast he checked atc
goddammkit u made smol child drop ice cream
beginners luck
rip that baby grand he probs didnt know how to play
+2 for that fire extinguisher
+50 for Pepper being a cutie with that gift
how does tony not have his liscence revoked? hes a shit driver and can hire a chaffeur
STAN LEE BABE
RIP COLESON OMG :'(
so just fire pepper and marry her
pepper is totally right and tony should seperate who actually matter to him
how is a lot of olives 3?
im not my company- THEN TAKE UR NAME OFF HOE
no, modern day hell s walking those 15 miles and watching a car and heli and camera lady who are fine and can get there in 20 minutes
i sincerely hope that these footages were planned and not real
is this the news or a documentary?
just realized he never gave pepper her drink lol
yeah, let the kids watch their dad get shot thats fine omg
after that hit, he looks like a lion
why did he say colonel rhodes form weapons development? that name isnt that common
there was 0 time for radio contact omg
the only thing i could think during this scene was SERPENTINE SERPENTINE SERPENTINE
k now im getting a lil tired of the electric guitar
finally obi has been outted geez
im feeling some west side story WITH snaps
why is raza telling obi what he ALREADY KNOWS CUZ THEYVE BEEN IN CONTACT
how has no one noticed that obi just GOES TO THE MIDDLE EAST LIKE ALL THE TIME
this scene between pepper and tony is THE MOTHER of cliched lines
WHY DIDNT SHE SHUT DOWN THE COMPUTER STUPID WEIRDO
he tried to push his hair back hahahaHAHAHAHAHhaha
not scraps obi.... he had his own stuff
im just imagining obi hidig under toys couch haha
that dick took his shirt!!!
yaas beethoven reference
props to makeup people for his paralysis on point!
sorry but paralysis seems to me like U CANT FING MOVE TONY
i thought the old reactor needed a magnet
OF ALL THE CARS TO STEAL RHODY YOU STEAL THE AUDI
goddman all these chains
JUMP SCARE COMING HAHA I KNEW IT
-2 awful jump scare
yes middle age mom- honk at the GIANT FING ROBOT
nooo not the hydrogen powered bus!
gooood iron freezes before stainless tell
daaamn obi is a real bad shot
and radiation now floods the malibu land area and thosands are illed thanks to tonys reactor
sk glad hes corrected the mediait aint iron
coleson never briefed tham
that was longer than 90 seconds
iron man- STOP TRYING TO BE BATMAN
great ending 10/10
affter credit scene: 10/10 avengers yay
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