#shiroiwa ruki x reader

[kimakento]

WHEN I CAN’T FALL ASLEEP

synopsis: he’s never there, and you’re sick of it. ⌙ 1.0k

pairing: bf!shiroiwa ruki x fem!reader

genre: angst

warnings/tags: ruki’s pretty toxic, lashing out, language, hurt and no comfort, guys idk [ignore typos]

a/n: haven’t written angst in a while so here y’all go….user kimakento angst return soon perhaps??

it happened again.

it was the fourth time in a row. despite that, here you were, waiting in your shared apartment; akin to a kicked puppy. a shaky breath escaped your lips as you leaned into the soft couch.

your thoughts were scattered, making your head reel. but that wasn’t the only thing you fought. slumber called your name — and of course it would, it was half-past three in the morning — yet you had seemed to escape it.

‘where was he?’ was the question that filled your thoughts. your living room was dark, the bright lights being turned off only a couple minutes ago; perhaps because you’d always felt like you could face anything in the dark ever since childhood. it shielded you. from what exactly, you weren’t entirely sure.

interrupting your thoughts, a loud jingle echoed from outside only moments later — a bunch of keys rattling while one turned in the lock. your breath hitched slightly, anticipating the man you’d waited so long for, but the usual excitement you felt whenever he stepped in never came.

you froze in your spot when the door closed shut again.

all you could decipher were the negative emotions: fatigue, frustration and sadness. his light footsteps moved closer, padding through the hallway.

were you really such an insignificant part of his life? who were you to him? did he even value you as his girlfriend?

the sound of the switch being flipped echoed through the room, and in an instant, the sudden brightness of the lights flooded the space, overwhelming your senses. it felt as though the light was piercing through the darkness, momentarily blinding you and forcing you to squint as your eyes adjusted.

but the expression clouding ruki’s face was all too familiar; a mix of surprise but firmness.

“why’re you up?” the sentence was sharp, cutting through your senses immediately. he stood in-front of you, clad in casual clothes; sweatpants and a black hoodie. “it’s late.”

you could imagine where the conversation was headed. you could’ve somehow avoid it by acting complacent and shutting your mouth. but no, you were so tired. tired of being the one disregarded and never getting a say. tired of the one he never even gave a slightest damn about.

“i was waiting for you.” you said. “you know, like how a normal girlfriend would do.”

two fingers pinched the bridge of his nose. “what are you getting at?”

”you’ve been coming home late.”

“so? you know i’m an idol. i have things to do. i work late sometimes.”

he didn’t get it. and he wasn’t trying to.

you insisted once again. “but it’s not just that, ruki. you missed our second anniversary last week and you were a no-show for our date night, with no explanation, i might add.”

ruki watched as you stood up, with hands on hips.

“this again?”

“huh?” you looked up at him in confusion.

“you being needy.” the man’s voice was cold. “i just said i’m a fucking idol. this kinda stuff just happens. you knew that before we started dating, [name].”

“wow.” you blinked once, then twice in utter disbelief. “just wow. why is it whenever i talk about what i’m feeling that it’s made out to be nothing? i’m a person too. fucking hell, ruki.” when you stepped closer to him, that absent look only served your exasperation.

“stop this. why do you always do this? it’s always me being painted out as the bad guy, you’re just unbearable at this point. do you want me to throw everything away for you? well, i'm sorry, but it's not my fault that you're acting so goddamn crazy over something so stupid.” he snapped.

in that moment, you came to a huge realisation. shiroiwa ruki had never cared enough to put you first; he never would. there was no use in still attempting to help your boyfriend see what he refused to and stayed blissfully ignorant to, but the lump in your throat persisted, reminding you of one thing; detaching yourself from someone that you held love towards pained you. however was it ever worth it if you were being hurt in the process?

‘was love worth it anymore?’ seemed like the right question. yet, you didn’t know.

“that’s not what this is about, and you know it.” there was a bitter taste in your mouth that you tried to swallow back thickly. “there’s only so much i can take.” your voice dwindled with every word.

ruki groaned, visibly frustrated. with his brows knit, he stood his ground.

“why do you always have to be so emotional, huh? i don’t owe you my life just cause we’re together. you’re just being unreasonable! i have a job and i also have duties to fulfil towards it.”

“so do i? but you don’t even do the bare minimum anymore. you never— i’m the one keeping this relationship afloat even when it feels like i’m sinking.” you paused and met his eyes, reading the crazed look that painted them. “i will not do that to myself anymore— putting you or the relationship you clearly don’t want above myself.”

“what?” the man’s tone had softened now.

“i’m done, ruki.” your voice broke. “i can’t deal with all this— you anymore.”

you walked away from him, grabbing a coat, awkwardly moving to put it on with one hand. your returned to pocket your phone and look at him.

but once ruki’s lips part, struggling to find the words. “[name]—“

“don’t bother.” you cut him off harshly. “i’ll come back to get all my stuff back when i’ve calmed down.”

“you can’t just leave. can’t we just handle this like adults?”

“believe me, i’ve tried one too many times.”

he was turned towards you now, frantically watching as you moved to leave. “but—“

“please don’t.” a whispered plead.

trudging your feet towards the door, you slip on your shoes, and collect your car keys from the hanger near it.

and with one last glance around, you stepped foot outside, the harsh breeze wisping your way.

reblogs are heavily appreciated!

[restlesswritings]

JO1 Scenarios:

Cute moments with him

A/N: Requests are open; Pairing: JO1 Members x Fem Reader Genre: Fluff Warnings: None Masterlists : JO1 JPOP KPOP

Sho

To other people it might have seemed odd when your boyfriend suggested strawberry picking for your anniversary but to you it made perfect sense, that was Sho. As you look at the massive amount of strawberries, one stands out. "Oh yes! This one will definitely beat hi-" Your words are cut off when a giant hand reaches over your shoulder, snatching the strawberry from you. "Hey! That one was mine you meanie!" You yell at your big, redheaded teddy bear like boyfriend, causing him to burst out laughing while dipping your big strawberry in condensed milk, getting a bit of the cream on his lip in the process. Rolling your eyes, you can't help but let a smile cross your features. "Come on hanii , you know you love me.." He says, as he holds up the biggest strawberry you've ever seen. He drops on one knee, holding the strawberry up to you. "Forgive me?" He asks while holding in one of his contagious laughs. Taking the strawberry, you gave him a big smile and yank him up, "Yes of course!" You say, quickly pecking his lips before running away with the strawberry, leaving your boyfriend shocked to say the least.

Ren

The sound of the front door opening almost causes you to drop the bowl in your hands, you quickly place it on the table, tidying up the flowers and candles. Just at that moment, Ren walks into the kitchen, "Y/N, what is all this?" He asks, surprise evident on his face. "I just wanted to do something nice for you. You've been working hard for the comeback." You say causing him to pull you into his warm embrace, "Thank you, this made my day." He says while pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. After you both sit down, he is the first to take a bite, "Mhm, oh my god.. this is delicious! You made this?!" He asks in shock causing you to laugh, "Hmm, you shouldn't question my cooking skills," You say playfully. Being so absorbed in the taste of the food he blurts out, "Thank you Y/N, seriously, I love this and I love you!" His eyes go wide, he lifts his thumb up in embarrassment, "Um.. I meant this is good.. good job? " He says. letting out a nervous giggle. You reach forward and grab his hand in yours, "I love you too Rennie" You say with the biggest smile on your face.

Ruki

"You didn't have to come with me, you know?" you say to your boyfriend, Ruki, watching as he struggles with a baby goat that was currently trying to eat his jacket. "I couldn't just let you come out here by yourself, with all these wild animals!" He exclaims, looking a little ridiculous in your father's farming clothes. "I appreciate it, Ruk-" your words get cut off as you let out a loud laugh as one of the sheep steals his hat right out of his hand. "Yah!" He yells at the sheep, running after it but having no luck. "Wait! I have an idea." You say and ran to the house as he continued his battle. You came back a few minutes later to an exhausted looking Ruki, his eyes lit up when he saw you, "You're back! This sheep is so stubborn, we can ju-" he cut himself off and his eyes got even wider when he noticed the feed in your hand. "You're so smart!" He said and grabbed some from you. After a few minutes of negotiating with the very stubborn sheep, you guys finally got his hat back. "Yes!! Oh my god, thank you!" Ruki exclaimed and pulled you into a hug. Walking back to the house, he stopped you, "I guess I was the one who needed saving, heh.. thank you hanii" he said and gave you a quick kiss. "Anytime you goof" you said with a smile.

Junki

You were currently making your way to the dorm and as you were about to knock the door was pulled open by an overly excited Junki, looking as cute as ever, in something as simple as a plain t-shirt and jeans. "AH! If it isn't my beautiful girlfriend!" he said with a giant smile, pulling you into a hug. Laughing while in his embrace you pulled back a little to see his smiling face, "So what do you have planned for us this evening, cutie?" you asked while moving some of his hair from his forehead. "Ah! I'm glad you asked, first I thought we could cook a meal together, which I'm sure will be a disaster.. then eat while watching only the best movie of all time, The Avengers!" he exclaimed, shooting a charming smile at you with such happiness in his eyes. "I love it!" You said with a smile before you both made your way to the kitchen. All was well, you two were laughing a lot and making progress with the meal until Junki went to flip it. "Junki, I can do it if-" you started before he shushed you, closing his eyes and letting out a dramatic breath before he quickly tried, and failed to flip the food, causing you to burst out laughing. "You're so lucky you're cute Kono Junki." You said as you made your way over to salvage the meal.

Keigo

"Yah can I take this off now?" your boyfriend, Keigo asks for the third time, causing you to roll your eyes as you finished sprinkling confetti on the floor. "I just put it on you and besides, do you want to see your surprise or not?" you said giving him a playful nudge. "I DO, that's why I need this blindfold off.." he said in a playful tone, making you roll your eyes once again. "Okay Mr smarty pants, almost ready.." you said as you went to the kitchen and grabbed the furry little baby, bringing her over to the living room where your anxious boyfriend was waiting. Sitting her down next to him, you fixed the pink bow on her neck, "Okay take it off!" you said excitedly, waiting for his reaction. He looked around and was confused before he glanced down upon hearing a little "mew" and his eyes got wide when he saw the furry kitten. "A KITTEN?!" he exclaimed, picking her up ever so gently, staring at her in awe. "You got me a kitty?" he asked and hugged the animal against his chest. "I got us a kitten, I know how much you wanted a fur baby." you said while petting the baby in his arms. "I love you so much, you know that right??" he said while pulling you into a hug, careful to not squish the small kitten. "I do know that and I'm assuming you liked the surprise?" you asked with knowing smile."I love it!" he shouted while playing with the new addition to your family.

Takumi

Knocking on Takumi's door, the last thing you expected to see was your redheaded boyfriend wearing pink bunny ears and a bright smile. "Wah! You look so cute Kumi!" you said to him in a baby voice, poking at his new accessory making his smile drop. "Oi stop! I only do this for you and you know it." He said while playfully swatting your hands away as you two made your way into his apartment. Your smile soon turned to shock as you came face to face with a romantic set up in his living room, complete with candles, face masks, snacks, and your favorite movie ready to be played. "Kumi.. you did this for me?" you asked, on the verge of tears. "Yeah, you said you had a rough day at work so I thought this could make it better.." he said shyly and rubbed the back of his neck. "My princess deserves to smile." he said before he was pulled into your warm embrace. "I love it, so much. Let's do facemasks first!" you said and pulled him over to the cute set up. Getting on your knees, you pushed his hair back with the headband and gently apply the tiger face mask. "Yah you look so cute!! Let me take a photo please!" you said and snapped a photo of your boyfriend, causing him to groan "Y/n! ugh you're the only one who can see that!" he said sternly, making you roll your eyes and laugh at how cute he was.

Syoya

The sound of your facetime ringtone brought you out of your thoughts as you pressed the accept button, your smile widened when you saw your adorable boyfriend on your screen wearing an equally big smile. "Y/n! I missed you!!" he yelled into the speaker. "Hi hanii! I missed you too, I was literally just thinking about you" you said with flushed cheeks, causing him to let out a laugh. "I wanted to call you while I was alone, I wanted to tell you somethi-" his sentence was cut off by loud laughter and the sound of a door slamming, "I spoke too soon heh.." Syoya said with a pout just as Shion and Shosei made their way into frame. "Hey! Did you tell her yet??" Shion asked, not realizing you were on call. "shh.. she's on the phone right now.." Syoya said while pointing at you causing the other two to freeze "Oi heh, hi y/n!" Shosei said and hurried out of frame, pulling Shion with him. "What did you want to tell me?" you asked, slightly nervous now. "Oh um nothing bad, I just um.. I love you.?" Syoya said more as a question causing you to look at your boyfriend in disbelief, "really?" you asked to make sure you were hearing things correctly. "Yes, I do. I can't wait to be home with you." he said before getting up, "Look I know this was a short call but I have to go. I love you." he said, waving as the other two waved as well "Wait! I love you too Kimata Syoya!" you said causing the biggest smile to form on his face and the other two to cheer before the call ended.

Shosei

"Okay I think I should add the ingredients and you stir them.." you said as your boyfriend was trying but failing at measuring the butter for the cake you two were currently trying to make from scratch. "Hey! I can do it.. I just have to uh.. I got this." Shosei said as he continued his battle with the measuring cups causing you to let out a loud laugh. "Okay, okay.. you do that and I'll preheat the oven." you said, turned your back for five seconds before turning around to a flour covered Shosei, you laughed loudly as you covered your mouth in shock at how quickly your boyfriend got messy. "How? That i-is my only question hahaha" you got out in between laughter, causing his cheeks to flush. "A little help please?" he said with big eyes, making you feel bad for your boyfriend. You reached over and lightly wiped the flour out of his hair and began to wipe the white powder off his cheeks when he grabbed your hand "What are yo-" you began to ask before he pulled you into a kiss, covering you in flour as well. Pulling back he could barely see your red cheeks under the amount of flour that was now covering your face. "There we both look ridiculous. Now can you hand me the eggs?" he asked as if nothing happened, leaving you shocked and covered in flour.

Sukai

Carrying the shopping bags with you, you made your way to your boyfriend, Sukai's apartment. Knocking you waited excitedly for him to open the door, a smile forming on your lips when the door flung open to a smiling Sukai who automatically pulled you into a warm hug. "y/n! What are you doing here??" " he asked, surprised you were at his house. "I got you a few things! But the only thing is.. I want you to try them on for me" you said while looking up at him with puppy eyes. "ehh.. okay only because its you!" he said as he pulled you into the living room, placing you on the couch. "I'll go change!" he said and disappeared. Returning a few minutes later, Sukai had a huge smile on his face, "I literally love this shirt" he said while striking a few poses for you causing you to let out a loud laugh. "I love it! You look hot!" you said causing him to blush and hide his face "Thank you hanii, I love this and you" he said and sat next to you, pulling you on to him. "You're welcome Sky, anything to make you smile.." you said and pecked his cheek causing him to blush even more. "I love you too" you added and snuggled into your boyfriend with a smile on your face.

Shion

"Okay, try holding it up more on the right side." you said to your boyfriend, Shion, who was currently trying to hang up a painting you had found for your shared apartment. "um, I think you're going to need a taller boyfriend, maybe a giraffe." he said in a huff, arms struggling to hold the piece of decor any longer. You couldn't help the obnoxious snort that escaped as you let out a loud laugh at your boyfriend and the current situation. " Wha- you liked that? I have more jokes where that came from." he said and put the painting down, walking over to you. "What does a storm cloud wear under his raincoat?" he asked with a huge toothy grin on his face, looking at you with big eyes. "Hmm I don't know, what?" you said, holding your stomach from laughing so hard. "Thunderwear!" he yelled and let out a loud laugh, falling to the floor. You joined him in the over the top laughter, which soon turned into real laughter like always when you were around Shion. "Thank you for always making me laugh, I'm going to live forever haha" you said and tried helping him up, only to fall down on top of him igniting the laughter once again. "I don't think this will ever get hung" you said with a playful groan, "I think it looks pretty good where it's at" he said causing you to laugh once again, both your stomachs aching from the laughter.

Mame

You were fidgeting with your fingers as you felt the nerves and excitement course through you while waiting for the boys to finish up in the dressing rooms. You were here as a total surprise to all the boys, especially your boyfriend, Issei. Hearing the loud sounds of the chaotic boys, you turned and immediately found your boyfriend's eyes. The look of pure shock was evident on his face and he ran towards you, scooping you up in his arms. "Y/n! What! I can't believe you're here!" Mame exclaimed, as he slowly put you back down, arms still wrapped around you. "I wanted to show my support for my favorite idol!" You said with a wink, smiling at your boyfriend, causing him to blush. Your moment was interrupted when Sho and Junki came up behind Mame and started making kissing noises, "AWH look at the two love birds!" Junki yelled, barely keeping his laughter in. "Aren't they the cutest??" Sho asks, Junki agreeing. You had never seen Mame's face more red than it was in this moment. "He's so cute, blushing and-" Sho was cut off by Mame playfully pushing them away. "Oi! I have a girlfriend, get over it" He said and put his arm around you proudly. "I could cry, our baby Issei is growing up." Junki said and walked away dramatically, leaving you and Mame with nothing but red cheeks and laughter.

A/N: PLEASE I HAD TOO MUCH GOING THROUGH MY HEAD WHILE WRITING THESE

[jo1jam]

JO1 as texts i found on pinterest✨

pt.1 🦊🌺🍓👑🍝

[jpop-imagines]

JO1 Imagine: Ruki - Part 1

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[jpop-imagines]

JO1 Imagine: Ren - Part 1

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[jpop-imagines]

JO1 Imagine: Sho - Part 1

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