#ship: padme & obi wan

[nibeul]

some old star wars art for may the fourth

[id in alt]

[brittababbles]

I love the idea that Rex found out Padme was married to Anakin and looked at his general and was like “ew. Why?”

Like, he loves Anakin. Anakin is his friend. He would die for Anakin. But you chose this disaster of a person to father your children? Padme, he eats bugs. And not just when he has to. He does it whenever he happens to see a bug. He just picks it up and looks at it and pops it in his mouth.

This is your chosen one?

And Obi Wan is just shaking his head like I don’t get it either, kid.

[phoenixkaptain]

Canon straight ships in Star Wars always crack me up like

You have Mutually Obsessed and Making That Everyone Else’s Problem (anidala)

Or maybe you want Roguish Princess and Rogue Turned On By That (hanleia)

Maybe even a little “I’m Trying to Kill You, Stop Daydreaming About Being My Best Friend” (lukemara)

And over there in the corner is Only Considered Normal In Comparison to the Given Competition (obitine)

And outside, not even apart of the conversation: Actually Normal Human Beings Who Just Love Each Other With Little to No Murder Being Involved (Bail&Breha, Owen&Beru)

[sabictlali]

Obianidala Episode II

[servethelight]

One thing I love about Star Wars is that most of the Canon relationships consist of a man falling in love with a woman who told him he was stupid and / or tried to kill him once and has a degree in bad bitchology.

[fanfic-obsessed]

Th CodyWan Obsession

This one is about how CodyWan, the obsession, could be used to fix the universe. 

It actually starts before Cody becomes Obi Wan’s commander. The 212th, with Alpha-17 as the commander, went to Kamino. This is still very early in the war, where Anakin is still a Padawan. Through some random set of events Anakin meets Cody, who is an ARC trainer, while touring the facility with Alpha (Obi Wan has some meeting or another and is not able to go with them). This conversation lasts all of 45 seconds before Anakin somehow divines or decides that Cody would be perfect for Obi Wan. 

Thus an obsession is born. 

Now Anakin has next to no subtly, but even he knows this obsession must be kept quiet at first. Because he believes he knows that, while Anakin is more than willing to break The Code to be with Padme, Obi Wan would not. So before Anakin starts matchmaking he wants a loophole in place.  His Master loves loopholes. 

So, on Anakin’s next leave he dives into the parts of the code that deal with attachment. His obsession is such that he even blows off Chancellor (He does at least call Padme, but spends no time with his new wife). Because he is looking for loopholes and different interpretations, h does not just dig into the actual wording of the Code (though he does that as well, and is surprised to learn that the interpretation he thought he knew- which he does realize later came exclusively from Palpatine- is wrong) but also into transcripts of the council meetings where that wording was was decided, an every meeting where it was rehashed. 

Madam Nu assumes, as most people do, that this had something to do with his infatuation with Padme Amidala.  She encouraged what he was learning, in hopes that it gave him a good direction. 

Anakin learns a lot during this deep dive into Archives. He learns that it is not so much the marriage that is against the code, but vowing to put one being over the rest of the galaxy (he also realizes that the vows he took with Padme did not break the Code). He learns the reasons why the Jedi caution against romantic relationships (all of which are very good reasons), and the variety of ways that the Jedi had mitigated the dangers and been in a successful, healthy romantic relationship, of which he made a mental note to bring up with Padme so they do not fall into some of the same traps noted (of which Falling and killing everyone you loved is one of many bad reactions). He also learns a great deal about the Jedi Order as a whole, and dispels most, but not all, of the incorrect views he had of the Jedi Order (the views that Palpatine so carefully shaped for Anakin)

So Anakin, now armed with all the arguments for why Obi Wan should date Cody, finds his first of many obstacles. Obi Wan has no idea who Cody is.  Anakin had not been paying attention to Cody’s ID number, nor did he catch that Cody was an ARC trainer, so has no idea how to find Cody. 

He is not able to find out who Cody is before Cody becomes Obi Wan’s commander, which makes him both feel guilty (for the torture Obi Wan and Alpha-17 underwent) and vindicated (because clearly the Force agreed with him about CodyWan).  Anakin then dedicates himself to being a matchmaker. He is not good at it. 

Neither Obi Wan nor Cody ever figure out what he is doing. This is not due to any subtlety on Anakin’s part, this is because none of his efforts to match-make looks anything like traditional matchmaking.  And while no one actually tells Obi Wan or Cody, everyone else in Anakin’s vicinity finds out within 15 minutes of his obsession with getting CodyWan together. 

Every conversation Anakin has with Palpatine after Cody becomes Obi Wan’s commander devolves into the wonders of CodyWan. For most of it Palpatine has no idea that Cody is a clone (as he does not know the Clone names, only their numbers).  Palpatine is split between wanting to help get CodyWan together (because Anakin is really compelling) and wanting to kill them both extra hard (because they had inadvertently derailed, and continue to derail, his corruption of Anakin). 

And Anakin’s corruption has been entirely derailed.   His research has given him a better view of the Jedi Order as a whole, and every attempt to besmirch the Jedi to him is met with actual concrete knowledge that the negative take is wrong.  He has gone through all the requirements for listing his relationship and marriage to Padme, so when she does get pregnant they are able to go to the Temple healers, thus no need to be worried about her safety.  Even the war is not pressing on his sanity in the right ways since about 40% of his brain is consumed with CodyWan at all times. 

Padme, who is a romantic in her own right (and just as bad a matchmaking), also falls into the CodyWan obsession. She is aware that Cody is Obi Wan’s clone commander, so much of her focus is getting the Clone’s rights and ending the war so that the two can be free to be together. Her former handmaidens are watching this all with awe, horror, and amusement.  

I know that CodyWan ends up together in this one. I feel like QueerPlatonic is right for them.  I also like the idea that they get together in spite of Anakin’s and Padme’s matchmaking efforts instead of because of it. 

Palpatine gets found out, by being a bit too heavy handed with Anakin, who has since stopped being corrupted by anything more subtle and is very oblivious. Somehow during this fight Palpatine finds out that Cody is the clone commander with the Jedi (which ironically makes him forget to activate Order 66) and announces Anakin’s wish for CodyWan to have a romantic relationship.    

This is news to both Cody and Obi Wan. This is not news to literally everyone else.  After Palpatine is defeated (not killed, in this one they manage to lock him up. The fight damages his vocal chords so he is not able to activate the chips) several bets were settled about CodyWan. Palpatine himself even managed to win some bets with several senators (there is some debate as to if they should be forced to pay out, and how, since Palpatine would be in a Force blocking cage for the rest of his life).

[tossawary]

Obi-Wan Kenobi in "Attack of the Clones" is incredible. He's bonkers. He jumps out a skyscraper window onto an assassin droid after he specifically told Anakin that they weren't going to investigate. Anakin saves him from a long fall by showing up with a speeder and Obi-Wan just chides him for being late as banter. Anakin outright sincerely says, "You're the closest thing I have to a father," while they walk into a nightclub and Obi-Wan distantly replies, "Then why don't you listen to me more?" and then goes to drink on the job. He mind tricks a random drug dealer into going home to rethink their life. Obi-Wan shows up to Kamino looking like a wet cat and confusedly goes along with the Kaminoans as they show off the clone army that he definitely did not order, and at no point does Obi-Wan or any of the other Jedi seriously bring up the fact that this is a fucking slave army. Anakin gets brought into the arena to join Obi-Wan in being executed by wild animals and Obi-Wan just acts like this is just another Space Tuesday for him and his padawan.

If we're going by the first two prequel trilogy films alone, then it's kind of like, "Yeah, Anakin obviously has a LOT of issues that are not necessarily Obi-Wan's fault, but wow, it kind of looks like Obi-Wan is NOT helping. Why did the Jedi Council let this man raise a child???" Like, sure, let's let the traumatized 20-something raise a traumatized 9-year-old, what could go wrong? Well, Obi-Wan is drinking on the job, apparently, possibly to ignore the fact that Anakin called him his dad. (Again? Doesn't seem like this is the first time!) And Anakin is, uh, immediately making the senator he's bodyguarding soothe and manage his upset emotions for him, before he then repeatedly pressures her into a secret relationship with him despite multiple refusals on her part. So, you know, it could be worse!

[thejediandthemandalorian]

So I have this mildly amusing concept in my head that follows my Codywan at a bar concept (that I don't think I've shared.) It would be really amusing if a bunch of horrible stuff happened and then the 212th and 501st all head back to coruscant together and Cody is all mopey and upset and distancing himself from obi wan for whatever reason and Rex is like 'dont worry we're gonna go to a bar tonight and make this better' and Cody is like fuck no, because Cody. And then Rex tells Fox and Fox, Mr by the book, is like oh yeah sure let's go and he's the one who picks Cody up and is like you're going. And when they get to the bar Rex is already there but he's got Anakin and obi wan with him and Cody is like...pissed at Rex and Fix because this was a set up. And all the sudden Quinlan appears out of nowhere, turns out fox didn't choose to come Quinlan said 'youre going, we're getting obi wan and Cody together, and we'll have a date night' and fox had like begrudgingly agreed for that reason. Cut to Rex is sitting awkwardly at a table with Cody And Obi wan, making sure they drink, and is also drinking himself and eventually Rex gets tired of them and goes and starts dancing with Anakin who hit the dance floor as soon as they got there. Cut to a little later, Cody is DRUNK. And obi wan is really drunk too, but he had gone off to the bathroom so Cody is still awkwardly sitting at the table people watching. Quinlan and Fox have long since disappeared. Anakin and Rex are like dancing so close they might as well be one person. And Cody's by himself. A club dancer comes up and Cody is drunk enough she convinces him to dance with her. Cody is in a State™️ and this girl just taught him how to dance. He's like out of it, that's how drunk he is, and obi wan comes back, also like super super drunk, downs another drink, and sees this club dancer hanging all over Cody and putting her hands all over him and having Cody do the same to her. So Obi Wan walks up to Cody is like 'mind if I cut in' and this club dancer is just like oh another hot man yeah sure and obi wan cuts in, but he doesn't dance with her, he starts dancing with Cody. Cut to Cody's memory pretty much blacking out and waking up the next morning in Obi Wan's bed at the Jedi Temple. He's confused at first because he's been in this room before but can't place it and then he realizes where he is. Obi Wan is awake and tells him good morning, both have horrid hangovers but the minute Cody hears Obi Wans voice he practically falls out of the bed and hits the floor, scrambling to put his clothes back on because he's just in a t shirt and briefs and he's freaking the fuck out cause he just woke up in the same bed as obi wan. Which it's not the first time he's fallen asleep near Obi Wan, but he also can't remember much of anything. So Cody rushes out the door, Obi-Wan calling after him (spoiler alert they didn't do anything they both just went back to Obi-Wan's place and crashed because they're old and boring even when drunk off their asses, but also they're in the middle of a war so they have every right to be exhausted.) And Cody goes rushing back to the barracks and practically pounds on Rex's door until he opens up. And when he does Cody starts talking real fast and Rex is like half sitting up watching him, not really as hung over cause he didn't drink that much, and has a higher tolerance than Cody cause let's get real he drinks way more often. And Cody is rambling and Rex is just like 'cody calm down it's okay, have a seat.' and Cody sits and puts his pounding head in his hands and is like 'I slept with Obi Wan.' but he doesn't know if they banged or not (they didn't.) And suddenly another person sits up in Rex's bed and suddenly Anakin is there and he's like 'what?! You slept with Obi Wan?!? Obi Wan slept with someone?!' and then chaos, hilarity, and angst ensues.

Like believe me, there's so much more to this idea but this much has me giggling.

[jessequinnfirstofhername]

Hey, you! Random Star Wars fan who's reading this!

Do you have any controversial Star Wars opinions you're just dying to tell the world about?

My inbox is open to all Star Wars confessions. I will react to each and every one, and that is my promise to you. I swear it on Anakin Skywalker's pretty little face. Feel free to submit anonymously if you so wish.

It can be silly, it can be serious, it can be thirsty, it can be rage-filled and bitter, or it can be gushing and giddy.

The opportunities are endless!

Let's cause some chaos! ;)

[ayceofcard]

do you think there was a specific moment where one couldn't recognize the beloved they were arguing with

(scene redraw) i've been getting my friend into star wars & we were on rots the other day. naturally, i made it my mission to inflict them with as much emotional damage as possible :)

[penelopwgarcia]

Anakin: two years ago, I married my best friend.

Anakin: Padmé is still pissed about it but Obi-Wan and I thought it would be funny

[hannagoldworthy]

Looks like Someone stole her mommy’s phone to circumvent my IP block lol. You need some attention, Domina? You getting bored under your bridge? Get used to it, because now this IP is blocked too.

Still, I have to laugh, because once again you are utilizing big words to try and intimidate me, but because you’re about as literate as a rock at the bottom of the Marianas Trench, you’re doing it wrong. Female chauvinism is an entirely different beast from plain chauvinism (also called MALE chauvinism, for reasons that should be clear to you). Next time, just cut out the word ‘female’ and call me a misogynistic sow again - we both know that’s what you wanted to call me in the first place.

Also, it’s amazing how someone who’s trying to accuse ME of misogyny just referred to two prominent female characters as objects that were readily interchangeable, with their only impact on the story being their effects on their male love interests. This is tragicfantasy-girl, folks! Voice of downtrodden women EVERYWHERE!

I love it, you completely disregard Padmé’s and Satine’s feelings on this matter. As much as I may joke about how Obi-Wan is the objectively more attractive man, I sincerely doubt Padmé would be more than passingly interested in dating him - Natalie Portman specifically said that Padmé liked Anakin because he helped her escape from her adult life into a romantic fantasy she hadn’t had the opportunity to indulge during her short childhood. Obi-Wan was not in the business of escapism, so she never really thought of him as more than a friend or a coworker.

And Satine? Satine would have ripped Anakin a new asshole, let’s be honest. She would have started gently, hinting strongly that she still thought of him as a child, wearing the dowdiest clothes in her wardrobe, maintaining a minimum distance between them, setting up a cover story as a brother and sister traveling rather than a married couple. Then, she would have firmly denied his advances, tried to set him up with her younger sister (and her nephew, when that fell through), had him sit and watch her do paperwork all day, and when he broke out the amateur-night Shakespeare monologue, she’d haul out the big guns and say “oh, Obi-Wan used to say the same things to me when we were young.” And, when she heard that he committed the war crime of collective punishment by killing Tusken Children for the crimes of their parents, she’d have reported him to the Council immediately upon seeing them, middle of a battle or no. Anatine as a concept is DOA.

But don’t let that stop you! If you really want to write that fanfic, you go on right ahead, Domina! I know you’re probably blonde in real life because you have this weird fixation on blonde female characters that makes you take any slight against them too personally! Why don’t you turn that energy into writing the Anatine fic nobody except you has ever asked for? Project your rancid personality on Satine and bone Anakin in effigy as much as you want! It’s what fanfic was MADE for!

[prismatica-the-strange]

Thinking about if Anakin fully killed Frei. Like... they "fight" and he runs her through with his lightsaber but instead of being immediately horrified by his actions he moves on to the younglings and the rest of the story goes on as canon.

Except!!! Darth is constantly haunted by her Force Ghost.

Everything he does is constantly critiqued and gets snarky remarks.

Just imagining him force choking some empire goon or officer and he hears Frei behind him go, "That'll show 'em. Killing off your staff one by one. Great job Ani."

And he just drops them with an annoyed sigh then turns to glare at her.

And after the og trilogy? When he's redeemed and they're reunited as force ghosts. Hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. The first thing he does is kiss her cause even as a sith he couldn't help but miss and love her. And they spend eternity together in the afterlife.