#shep lambrick

[doritofalls]

these guys are up in my shop now!

[deepspacedukat]

Manners

Goddammit, I’ve got the brainrot real bad. He’s a fucked up evil rich man, but... ✨p r e t t y ✨... Anyway, hopefully writing this quickie drabble will get it out of my system. We all know that’s not how it works, but why not try? It’s not like writing about him will make it worse, right? ...R-Right?

I’ll get back to requests, I promise. But my brain needed to get this out first.

Cross-posted to AO3 here.

~*~

Shepard Lambrick (Would You Rather) x Reader

[A/N: Idk, I should probably explain myself, but...I don’t wanna, so I won’t.]

Warnings: Language, Julian being a spoiled brat, Shepard being a gentleman, mild flirting.

~*~

In my defense, it had been a long week. I was tired and only vaguely paying attention to where I was walking on my way home from work. Before I had even registered that there was someone in my path, I’d rounded a corner, collided with them, and was wearing their very hot coffee in short order. As I stammered apologies, an angry snarl came from the other person.

“Are you fucking blind? You clumsy, brainless little–” The young man in a suit looked as though he was about to haul off and hit me.

“Julian, be quiet! I’m sure it was an accident. Mind your manners. There’s no need to use such language, especially around a lady,” an older gentleman silenced the young man who’d been shouting so indignantly. He was the more immaculately dressed of the two, and if I had to take a guess, I’d say he was his father. Both their appearances practically screamed how blue their blood was. The older man gave me a smile and placed a careful hand on my upper arm. “I’m so sorry for my son’s abhorrent lack of manners, Miss. Are you alright?”

“I...Yes, sir. I’m fine. I really am sorry, though. At least let me pay for a new coffee,” I offered, but the kinder of the two simply shook his head.

“That won’t be necessary, I assure you.” His son scoffed beside him and was immediately given a stern glare. “My name is Shepard Lambrick, and my ill-tempered son, who you’ve already met, is Julian.”

After a polite smile from the man and a roll of his son’s eyes, I introduced myself as well. Shepard repeated my name quietly before lifting my hand to his lips like an old-fashioned gentleman might have.

“It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance, though I wish it had been under better circumstances. Julian, why don’t you run along back to the car and wait with Bevans while I rectify this situation?” With a muttered ‘whatever,’ the two of us were left alone. Suddenly, Mr. Lambrick’s gaze felt slightly more weighted. Under the intense scrutiny of his striking brown eyes, I was acutely aware of the rapidly-cooling coffee staining the front of my work uniform. The cold breeze swirling through the town didn’t work in my favor as I struggled to contain a shiver. “Now, my dear, what can I do to make up for my son’s behavior?”

“Mr. Lambrick, there’s no need. Really, I’m fine.” My protests fell on deaf ears as he tutted quietly.

“I can’t in good conscience allow this to pass without doing something to fix it. My honor would be sullied if I let such a lovely young lady walk away without restitution for the embarrassment my son has caused,” he said, and with a blink I realized that his fingers were still wrapped gently but firmly around mine. “I could have your clothes cleaned, or buy you replacements?”

“That won’t be necessary. Tomorrow is laundry day anyway. There’s no harm done.”

“Then perhaps I can at least treat you to dinner tomorrow evening?” This time he sounded genuinely hopeful. “And before you give me some exceedingly kind demurral, I assure you it would be my pleasure to share your company. Please?”

He seemed so genuine. I had only just met him, but...well, I supposed there was no harm in a dinner invitation.

“Mr. Lambrick–”

“Please, call me Shep,” he said giving my hand a little squeeze. His brow furrowed momentarily and he pulled off his suit jacket, draping it around my shoulders. “Where are my manners? I completely forgot how cold it can get this time of year. As for dinner, I promise you’ll enjoy it. What do you say?”

I’d never been on the receiving end of such a gentlemanly gesture. Being careful not to allow his obviously expensive suit touch the stained part of my clothing, I savored the warmth embedded in the fabric. Even the cologne clinging to the material smelled expensive. Who the hell was Mr. Lambrick, anyway? Just like that, curiosity made up my mind for me.

“...Alright. Sure. That sounds...really nice, actually.” It had been a long time since I’d had a meal that I hadn’t cooked myself. At my acceptance, a large, warm smile spread across his lips.

Oh no, he was actually quite attractive.

“Wonderful! Splendid! Give this number a call at your earliest convenience - it’s my driver’s - and I’ll make arrangements for him to pick you up,” he said releasing my hand just long enough to hand me a business card. “I very much look forward to seeing you tomorrow, my dear.”

He pressed a soft kiss onto the back of my hand, and as he began to walk away I paused.

“What about your jacket?”

“Keep it. I have plenty of other suits,” Shepard said tossing me a wink before continuing on his way.

[matthewkimble]

god i need him so bad it's worrying (jeffrey combs it's always jeffrey combs of course it's jeffrey combs)

[lysershine]

The skrunkly!! When the scrimblo!!! 🥴❤️✨😻

[miskatonic-memes]

does anyone actually know what jeff's motivation was in would you rather?? was he trying to teach those people a moral lesson, like saw lite or something? was he just being an asshole? maybe we'll never know. unless you do know, in which case please tell me

[dinobobwhereheshouldntbe]

Dinosaur Bob shouldn’t be in the big bag of money Shepard Lambrick gives Iris.

[disappearcd-blog]

' could i sit here? all of the other tables are full. ' ( hE ASks W/ PRolly a Creepy Predator-y-ish sMILE :\ )

📨 SUDDEN CONVERSATION IN PUBLIC SENTENCE STARTERS

hunched over to balance his chin on the crest of a jean clad knee, brian blinks a couple times to clear his vision of reverie — the mess of papers on the café table steadily losing his faint attention.��“ huh? ” the soft, unwieldy acknowledgement suggests he anticipated a waiter, and his gaze reveals astonishment when he doesn’t find one. pink lips remain parted in a dumbfounded expression as he steals a glance at the stylish pocket square and wrist watch tucked beneath a sleeve — caught off guard by the other’s stunning, well-to-do regard. “ sure, sure thing! ” worn, dusty sneaker slips from the edge of his seat onto the linoleum below and his posture straightens as he begins gathering loose pages and carelessly stacked library books.          when he came upon some spare change he liked to arrive early, seizing the booth with the best view before the rush of noon customers swarmed. most took one look at his deliberately scattered work and knew to sacrifice their chance of attaining one of the empty seats at his selfishly possessed table, but he guesses the uptown gentleman is accustomed to establishing connections in his advanced age. the elderly are commonly more friendly in his experience. “ it gets busy this time of day. ”

[agentdammers]

public displays of horniness 4 shepard lambrick are some of the most valid posts around bc i love to feel like im facing marginally less judgement for being like Shep Bottom 4 Me Challenge while he spits pistaschio shells out on to the sofa next to him like a dirty filthy bastard

[welllplayed-blog]

       sometimes shep thinks in detail about making julien play the game bc he’s so fcking annoying and he could present it in a way that was like ‘haha i had 2 do this when i was younger it’s just !!! ur duty as a lambrick !!! don’t worry i’ll go easy on ya !’ but then like ... killin’ julien off. some nice peace n’ quiet.

[doritofalls]

straight up catch me with the shep lambrick bodypillow

[welllplayed-blog]

LIL STAT SHEET                                                            

NAME: shepard michael lambrick AGE: 55 TEXTURE ( I.E. OF HANDS, SKIN, ETC. ): shep’s hands are frickin’ clean and soft but also like ... very strong. he ILY’s manicures. he’s got a few scars peppered here and there ( when julien was A Teen™ sometimes he’d get mad @ dinner and jab forks into shep’s hands which is Cute ).  CLOTHING STYLE/FREQUENTLY WORN CLOTHES: real well dressed - he’s always in a suit ... like always ... even his pajamas look like suits ... they’re expensive ... everything he owns is expensive. it’s exhausting. next. EYE COLOR ( LIST SYNONYMS ): they’re big n’ brown and when you look at them they seem soft but they’re not soft he’s just a Great Actor.  HAIR COLOR AND STYLE ( LIST SYNONYMS ): grey but also brown ... always done.  OTHER DISTINGUISHING PHYSICAL TRAITS: most of the time ... like ... mostly always shep is wearing long sleeves. he’s got lots of deep major large Big Time Scars on his arms from the first few games he had. he was younger ... not as quick ... not as patient and he paid for it physically. i’ll do an edit of it eventually : )

ACTION TAGS ( I.E. SCRATCHING HEAD, NAIL BITING, ETC. ): BABE IS ALWAYS EATING!!!!! holy shit! always has things in his mouth. he also loves 2 point and adjust The Cuffs of his shirts n’ stuff. VERBAL TAGS ( LIST SPEAKING STYLE: TALKATIVE, SOFT-SPOKEN, LOUD, FORMAL, ACCENT, FAST,ETC. ): it’s so frustrating because when shep is talking to you - only you - you feel like the most important person in the room. something about the way he talks, his tone is so gentle? like you feel like he’s going to keep his promise ...protect you ... like he’s going to make sure you have all that you need regardless of ‘the game’ or ... like anything else. he’s so good at what he does which sucks ... but if he’s like ... Real Mad™ it’s ... So Uncomfy because his voice like ... cracks a little bit? like you can hear the excitement? because his anger is always Excited Anger ... like he knows no matter what he’s going to win. he’s So Eager Always.  THINGS THAT MAKE HIM ANGRY: when people try to CHANGE the rules of his game ... when they try to LEAVE after he’s already given them the opportunity. julien pisses him off most of the time simply because ... like ... chill @ julien jfc. he gets defensive when people think he can’t / won’t follow through w/ his promises. like when people think he ... doesn’t have as much money / power as he does? lmao. yikes. we get it.  METHOD OF HANDLING ANGER: he likes to mUrDeR hUmAn BeInGs, preferably ppl who are vulnerable and asking for his help ... he likes 2 offer them things and then like ... watch the Hope Leave Their Bodies when they realize they’re never gettin’ out!!! cya. lmao. it’s never in his actual home, though. it’s always in the mansion where the lambrick’s hold events. he’s got a nice soundproof basement with everything he could ever possibly need to, y’know, make things happen. sometimes if he’s tired, he gets bevans to set everything up ... or like ... do it while he watches. fun entertainment.  THINGS THAT EMBARRASS HIM: julien :\\ srry pal.  METHOD OF HANDLING EMBARRASSMENT: he walks away ... like ... ‘ok ... u do u ... don’t touch anybody ttyl’.

FAVORITE FOODS: shep loves meat 8) - like ... meat and potatoes are his fav. he really likes big meals, but he frickin’ loves to snack, too. like ... junk food snack. he likes chips a lot - but only if they’re folded over ... like flat chips are Not Fun ... FAVORITE COLOR: slate grey. FAVORITE PLACE: the lambrick mansion for events. PERSON/FRIEND CLOSE TO CHARACTER: bevans lmao.