#shell be like

[kedreeva]

There's some dude (derogatory) on FB who is PISSED people are pricing their farm fresh eggs at $2 and $3 a dozen instead of $4+, saying it's "disrespectful" and "undignified" and "I'm trying to feed my kids" like Sir, you are on a Facebook group page bitching about your neighbors egg prices because your pet chickens aren't earning you a living wage and you think it's your neighbors' fault, you do not have a leg to stand on here wrt dignity.

Also half the answers are like "I give them to friends and family free" or "I donate them to food banks" or "I'm making them affordable to folks who might not otherwise be able to get them now that they're so expensive in the store" and "if you think you're going to turn a profit keeping backyard chickens you have been wildly misled" and so on, and so forth, and I'm so living for it.

and I can tell you right now, he did NOT like my answer of "if you're trying to feed your kids, I hear eggs are edible."

[proxycrit]

Day 36- Necluda Depths

(The Skulltalos is a fan made boss monster designed by yours truly, because the lack of variety in the Depths saddens me.)

The depths are chock full of botanical wonders and amazing beasts! Sometimes too amazing. The Yiga clan and our two heroes may absolutely loathe each other, but the giant spiders really put your priorities back in order.

(This totk rewrite au is called Familiar Familiar! It all starts when Zelda doesn’t get sent back in time.)

((Wanna support me? Check out my patreon, with my throw away sketches and references! Remember to use web or android folks, apple charges 30 percent tax.))

[nat-20s]

Ten and Donna end up on a fucked up deadly space newlyweds show despite uh. Not being newlyweds but they get almost all the questions right. They start to sweat when the final question is "what's one secret desire you have involving the other?" And Donna writes "sometimes I wish I could occasionally shrink down the doctor real small so I could carry him around in my pocket and make sure he doesn't get lost' while Ten writes "sometimes I wish I was small enough that Donna could carry me around in like a cat backpack or maybe a shirt pocket" and they look at each other like AYYYYYY because not only are they deeply drift compatible they're also fuckin weird about it 💖

[whenthewallfell]

Prim likes to catch Katniss up on all the gossip she missed while away on her hunting trips

[knifebaby3000]

checked into your heart and trashed it like a hotel room

[daredevil-vagabond]

And I know it's true, that visions are seldom what they seem

Cicada Jason.

[zeromotherfuckers]

Relistening to Stolen Century and am still so in love and obsessed with how immediately Justin is enamored with Lup. He finds out Taako has a sister and he's so intensely in love with the idea of her. Griffin drops her first line of "Nerd Alert!" and Taako is on the floor laughing- Justin sees the vision and he knows the vision and he's IN IT. HE LOVES HER. TAAKO LOVES HER. AUGH.

Griffin knew exactly how to play it, and Justin was on board before Griffin could even say jump. Its just insanely beautiful the way Justin latches onto it, because Yeah. Because Yeah, if Taako had a sister he'd be obsessed with her. They'd be obsessed with each other. A perfect duo that doesn't always agree but who bring the same energy to the table. Lup is the perfect accent to Taako. They balance each other. They're the Twins. And he loves her so so so much.

And Justin loves her so so so much

And I love them so so so much

[xeemaee]

I’m not saying this art made me Ship Them ship them but like… I do see the vision here

[qoldenskies]

i think its so funny when people take the way donnie acts at face value even though its a horrible lie because he's a horrible liar, while understanding leo is bullshitting very well despite him actually being GOOD at bullshitting. many such cases

[sea-beam]

how

[snaileer]

I’m a Size Medium, Thanks.

Danny is irritated. No actually he is beyond irritated. He is annoyed, he is frustrated, he is…. He’s really fricking irritated and can’t be bothered to remember any more of Jazz’s SAT words.

He continues his glare out the window as he searches for his straw with his mouth.

He just- where is it- thinks it’s a stupid fricking-stupid ass milkshake-he shouldn’t have to basically-gah! Danny snaps his head down to find his suddenly missing straw, only to successfully poke it directly into his eye.

“Ow! Fricken-“ He groans, throwing his head back, and putting his hands to his face, “Mother-tucker, Holy Taming of A Shrew!” He pounds his free hand not cradling his eye on the table, trying not to make more of a scene. Of course, this utterly fails because it immediately tips over his milkshake glass with a clatter as it spills onto his pants, making him jump up with enough force to knock the table over and drop the milkshake glass the rest of the way to the floor.

Danny stares at it with blurry vision and a watery eye. He sighs, “At least-“

The glass shatters.

Danny sighs again, deeper. “Of course.”

He looks up at the restaurant around him. Noticing the many, many people staring at him.

Wonderful.

Danny grimaces, “Sorry, I so didn’t mean for that to happen, uh-“ Danny reaches to straighten the table, fumbling for a second before it stands upright, he steps away from it, “If there’s any way I can help or.. like fix it. I can pay for the cup..” a server comes over to him, “if you want..?”

The server’s dead eyes don’t waver as they silently place a wet floor sign over the spilled milkshake.

“Thanks.”

“Uh huh.”

The server walks away, leaving Danny to sigh all on his own. He leans over to grab his backpack from the booth, checking it over for milkshake before slinging it on his back, thankfully clean.

He makes it one step forward before he feels the floor go out from under him. Ah gravity. His greatest enemy. This is karma for all those times he’s ignored it, isn’t it?

The wind is knocked out of him when his back slams to the floor, cushioned by the dulcet sounds of his bag crunching against broken glass.

He looks up at the wet floor sign.

The man on the yellow plastic mocks him.

Danny sighs.

He curses his stupid luck.

He curses this stupid city.

Then he curses himself because he knows any of this stupid city’s curses end up affecting him anyways.

Danny gets to his feet, ignoring the feeling of milkshake on his hands and his… everywhere.

He trudges out of the diner without looking back. At least he’d already paid for it.

He grimaces at the milkshake handprint on the door, trying to wipe it away with his shirt and only succeeding in making it worse.

Danny catches the eyes of the server inside, staring at him, eyes progressively more annoyed.

Danny puts his hands up in surrender and backs away.

Directly into a person. Only his milkshake covered self prevents him from being hit with anything more than the man’s scathing glare.

He puts his hands back up and moves away to dodge everybody else on the sidewalk. Along with the occasional ghost. Visible only to him of course.

By the time he has managed to escape the sidewalks into an alley, he is certain there is a trail of slightly sticky businessmen behind him.

Danny crouches to swing his backpack down in front of him and take stock. Okay, he could put his sweatshirt on over it… but it would also get ruined… damn it.

Danny looks around, checking every inch of the alley for cameras and then backing himself into a corner just to be safe. The flicker of intangibility is barely noticeable except for the wet squelch of milkshake remnants dropping to the alley floor. Lovely.

And of course, the flash of every single Gotham ghost in the area becoming visible and almost tangible for a split second. Also… lovely. There’s a couple startled shouts on the street.

Maybe an alleyway was not the best place for that.

Danny slides his sweatshirt on over his shirt to at least pretend like he was covering a mess and then shimmies out of the alley while trying to make as little contact with ghosts as possible.

He’s almost completely certain he looks crazy as all get out if the stare he gets from a passerby means anything.

Of course… now he’s left glaring across the street again.

He can feel the Infini-Map burning a hole in his backpack. It said this was the next place a natural portal would open and get him back home.

It just didn’t say… when that portal would open.

But of course, it’ll be right in the middle of somebody’s store. Usually not an issue. Except again, this stupid city’s curses are attracted to his energy, so of course the store couldn’t be literally ANYTHING ELSE!

Danny glares at the stupid fricking sign and the stupid predictable pun and the stupid neon hand in the front window waving at him.

‘The Claire Witch Project: psychic, medium, and Claire-voyant’

Danny is on day three of simultaneously avoiding the entire building while remaining close enough he can be there when the portal forms.

He is dirty, tired, and running out of money. In short, Danny is starting to lose hope on this endeavor.

The worst part?

He has the perfect solution.

There’s a pathetic little piece of printer paper taped to the inside of the window.

‘Help wanted’

When he’d first gotten here, Danny had followed the infini-map all the way to this horrific city, seen the sign, and turned a quick 180. He’d rather die again thanks.

He’d smacked into two billboards just coming into the city, and there was literally no stars, why would he want to stay here till the portal opened when he could just find another?

Except.. Danny’s eye twitches dangerously as he thinks back on it- except there wasn’t another portal. This was it. For the foreseeable future, he either caught this portal or was stranded for whoever knows how much longer.

Danny sighs again and dreads his continued existence. He looks both ways on the street, takes a step forward, nearly gets run over, steps back, and turns for the nearest crosswalk.

Fine. He could follow rules if it meant increasing his chances of leaving.

He tries to hold in the sigh this time, he really does, he swears.

Not the one before he opens the shop door though, that sigh deserved freedom from his trials. It joins the myriad of whispy translucent shades lingering in the store. Because of course there was just enough spiritual energy in here for them to be visible to him.

“Hey there!” A girl in loose fitting colorful clothing appears from behind a corner, “I’m Claire! How can I help your life journey today?” He can see the way her bulky crystal hair accessories sway with her movements. What was he getting into here again?

Danny tries to ignore the incense shoving itself up his nose as he speaks, “Hey, I was…” He was really doing this huh? “Hoping that the help wanted position is still available?”

The girl looks him over as she moves to the back of the checkout counter. The clear observation makes him nervous, and he takes his hands out of his pockets to try and look marginally more… candidate-able.

“You have experience?”

“Sure d-“ He wants to throw up in his own mouth, ancients this is so cringe, just let him die, “Sure do!” He says through choked back vomit and false cheer, “I’m a…” -barf- “I’m a medium.”

“Oh don’t worry about that, you don’t need a uniform, I don’t need your size silly!”

Danny blinks. What? Also. What?

“Wait-I’m hired?”

Claire pauses from getting something from under the counter, “Didn’t I already say that?”

“Uh…” Danny’s eyes dart around the shop, “No?”

“Oh well, you are, you have the right vibes, don’t worry,” she slides a few papers onto the glass counter, and Danny is abruptly, horrifically reminded he has no legal documents to speak of here. He thinks. He hasn’t actually checked.

Crap.

“Of course, most of my clients pay in cash, so I’ll pay you in cash too just to make it easier, and any crystal sales I’ll just add to it. Sound good?”

“Sure?” Oh no, is this gonna be Danny’s first real job? “But I don’t know anything about crystals. I have a goth friend but she’s not into that stuff.”

Claire waves his comment away, “Oh no worries, I can leave a packet.”

Danny nods, “Thank- wait, sorry. Leave?”

Claire laughs, pulling out a bag from behind her counter, “Yes I leave for a trip in two days. Family things you know,”

Danny feels like his brain is being scrambled, “Oh, what, what happened? Is everything okay?”

Claire looks at him, blinking wide, “What? Why would anything have happened?”

“Because… you said, you were leaving for-“

“Just don’t want to get caught in a bad position, you know how it is.”

Some of the shades stir in the air, their misty movements twitching with agitation enough to draw his eye for a second.

“Right. Well I’m glad I came when I did then,” Danny says, because he still doesn’t want to be rude.

Claire smiles at him.

Danny pats his hands against his sides awkwardly, trying not to look up at the movement of the shades intertwined with incense smoke at the ceiling.

There’s a little jingle behind him, which he belatedly realizes is the door when Claire moves to greet them before he can even turn around.

“Ms. Jives! Wonderful to see you! How’s the goldfish?”

Ms. Jives turns out to be a slightly older woman, maybe early seventies with a cane but she looks good. The coffee brown hair is almost certainly a dye job but it frames her wrinkled face well.

“Oh Jim is lovely dear, much better this way, I bought him a new plant just the other day, he just loves it.”

“Good, here for your reading right?”

“I am! But you can finish up with your customer first if you need,” Ms. Jives says. Claire waves her concern away.

“No need, this is Danny, I just hired him, he has a similar mystical connection.”

“Oh that’s lovely,” Ms. Jives says as she passes by him, “Would you like to come with dear? Claire is going to do a reading for me.”

Danny grimaces, “Sure.”

In the end, by the time Ms. Jives makes it slowly to the back room, Danny is trying to think of where he’s gonna sleep tonight. He mostly zones out when Claire dims the lights and starts talking nonsense.

All he heard was “something something card, something something magician something reversed something something balance something something chihuahua.”

Ok, maybe he wasn’t listening. But he was trying to focus on not staring at the movement of the shades, and the incense was mega strong and Claire had some weird ass music playing. He’s almost certain she’s faking everything. Down to the atrociously bright bead earrings.

Danny sags when she finishes, all too happy to leave the weird little curtain covered room.

He stands in the front awkwardly while Ms. Jives pays, twiddling with the various crystals and trying to figure which ones are actually y’know.. mystical or whatever.

Answer? Surprisingly most of them. That he could tell, at least, but it’s not like he actually knows how to sense that out on purpose. He’s pretty sure a couple of the heart shaped rose quartzes are complete duds but what does he care.

He’s thoroughly bored by the time Claire calls him back over. Apparently to tell him that he’ll do a reading tomorrow.

“Tomorrow?!” Danny blurts, “Don’t you want to like- I don’t know, make sure I can- or like.. I don’t know, but tomorrow?”

Claire just smiles at him, “I believe you can handle it, trust me.”

‘Trust you? Lady, I just met you and you’ve been nothing but crazy the whole time!’ Danny wants to say, instead, he keeps his mouth shut and nods with what he’s sure is fear in his eyes.

Then she’s pressing something into his hands and when he looks down it’s a key. A key. There’s no way-

“So be here 9am sharp, Danny! You can open up and I’ll come in later!” Claire starts pushing him towards the door, “And Mr. Wayne should be waiting for you when you get here!”

Danny turns around to catch himself in the doorframe, “Mr who will be what now!? Wait, Ms. Claire, Ma’am- why-!” He stops to lower his volume and ask politely, “Why am I doing this? You don’t even know me,” Danny says, one leg still in the store.

Claire smiles, “Because the universe told me to silly! See you tomorrow! Here’s my number!” Then she slaps a sticky note to his chest with enough finality that Danny takes a step back. The door closes with a click and ring of the bell inside.

Danny stares at the door with his eye twitching for at least a minute.

What the hell did ‘the universe told me to’ even mean, you kook!?

Danny sighs and looks down at the sticky note, quickly inputting the number in his phone before something happens to it.

He’s barely hit save when he finally steps away from the shop front and…. is immediately drenched to the bone.

Because apparently it’d been pouring rain and he simply hadn’t noticed from under the awning.

He watches as blue ink slides off the sticky note in little sad face streaks.

Danny sighs.

[selfindulgentraptor]

Thinking about his wings

[crowwowo]

Kiss prompts 7? 🌞 I really love the previous oneee so so gentle

7. A kiss on the eyelid or undereye, aka let him kiss her scar!!

I went through so many different sketches for this one, but finally settled on the least angsty <3

This is the sight the Inquisition’s met with post Doom Upon All the World. Specifically, I think this takes place a few days post battle, with Cullen walking Ali to the great hall after her wounds have mostly healed. They’ve already told eachother that they love eachother at this point, but they cant help jumping it on their friends >:)

(Do we like how inconsistent they look^)

[yourplaceinaugust]

i have no idea how my mom has a job bc she does not know how to write a resume

[woventiesgang]

Raph is, you’re not a danger. You’re not a risk. You are safe, and so are your brothers. You’re not gonna hurt anyone. How do I know this? I just do. Trust. Shhhhhhhhh

He says thank you ;)

[jadewritesficshere]

Merman!Steve who is listening but not too intently to Dustin. He feels the sense of danger pull in his gut seconds before Dustin screeches. Steve barely has time to push Dustin through the water away before a net is closing up around him. Dustin is yelling as the net lifts Steve closer to the surface of the water.

Which- this is not how he wanted to spend his day. The one rule of hiding from humans and here he is immediately breaking it. He grits his teeth, tries to use his claws to tear the net, but it is thickly woven. He can't help the panic build inside as he gets pulled above the water.

Steve's tail flops wildly as he flails, trying to get out. The sky looks different without the haze of water but he barely has time to focus on that before the net is deposited on the ship. The hard wood under his back is different then the sunken ship him and Robin hang out at, and he cringes at the feeling.

"The fuck are you?" A voice asks. Steve flashes his fangs at the voice and holds his claws up. The man standing in front of him raises an eyebrow at him. The human...isn't attacking him? Isn't trying to cut his tail off and sell it? Isn't trying to pry his teeth from his jaw and make necklaces like they do sharks?

"Well shit," the human murmurs, scratching his chin. The man has some wrinkles, moves slowly to sit down, grimacing slightly. "Shit," Steve parrots back, the words difficult to make since he has never used his voice like this. He is realizing this human is hurt by his slow movements- he doesn't want to hurt someone who is already hurt.

"Hey Uncle Wayne did- what the fuck is that!?"

Steve jumps and turns to the new voice and-

It's the most gorgeous human he's ever seen. Big brown eyes and plump lips. His skin has ink on it, designs that are intriguing. His hair is long and Steve wants to run his hands through it, see if it is soft or not. See how it moves through his hands. His legs are long, maybe longer then Steve's tail. He has muscles in his arms, but is lean. Absolutely divine.

"Am I hallucinating? You uh you see this too right?" The man motions to Steve, staring openly at him. Steve preens slightly under the man's gaze. The man should look, admire him even. Steve would pose in front of this man for hours if he asked. The man holds his hand up and waves slightly at Steve, as if trying to make him disappear.

Steve blinks a few times, tilting his head. The man is frowning and he looks upset- the man shouldn't look upset, even if it makes his lips look more plump. Steve raises his hand, the net hindering his movements. The man's mouth drops open as he sees Steve's webbed fingers. Steve looks at his hand then the man before copying the wave the man did.

An incredulous laugh busts out of the man. It startles Steve at first but it's a good noise. The best noise. He could listen to this all day. He makes clicking noises back at the man, his version of laughter.

"Eddie, put the net back in the ocean," The Uncle-Wayne says," Let him-er, it?- go home." "This is insane! This is- oh my god-" "Eddie!" The Uncle-Wayne motions to the net, stopping The Eddie from speaking further. Steve doesn't want The Eddie to stop, he loves the tone of The Eddie's voice.

"Right, er, let me just uh get the net then," The Eddie nods looking at Steve again before rushing off. Steve pouts and leans forward, trying to see where he went. "Jesus Christ," The Uncle-Wayne mutters, causing Steve to look at him.

The Uncle-Wayne rubs his temples before looking at the sky," The one day my nephew agrees to come with me." He sighs and shakes his head," Of course, why not? Couldn't find a human had to be a fish person."

Steve isn't sure what The Uncle-Wayne is talking about. Before he can think too deeply on it, the net is moving. He fumbles and twists in the net, grabbing the sides to stay up right. The net lifts in the air and moves over the side of the boat. Gracefully, the net is lowered back into the water.

As soon as there is an opening, Steve darts out of the net. His heart is beating so fast, he can feel his pulse in his hands. Free of the net, he looks back at it in offense. It stays lowered for a few moments, Steve pushing it away with his tail as it drifts closer to him.

Steve watches as it raises back up out of the water he can see the water falling onto the surface, like how it does when it rains. It's beautiful, in a way, but it's also sobering to think of how deadly it could be if it wasn't The Eddie and The Uncle-Wayne.

Steve cautiously pokes his head up out of the water to look at the ship. His eyes meet once again with The Eddie's, who is leaning over the edge of the ship. His smile is beautiful, but he doesn't have sharp teeth like Steve. Steve smiles, afraid The Eddie will be scared of his teeth. He sees The Eddie inhale sharply, but The Eddie doesn't look scared. Steve can't decipher exactly what The Eddie's look means as he licks his lip.

Steve raises his hand like The Eddie did earlier and waves. The Eddie laughs, such a beautiful noise to Steve. Melodious and free. The Eddie laughs and waves as the ship pulls away. Steve waves until The Eddie and the ship are too far away.

They are too far to see Steve slip back under the water and race after the ship, following the vibrations in the water. They don't see Steve follow them to the dock. They don't see Steve as he watches them get off the boat to the land. But Steve sees them. He sees The Eddie. And he'll come back with the best shell he can find to give as a gift to court The Eddie. He'll bring back a hundred gifts if he has to.