#she's trying. she's really trying. and it's showing results

[alicethenobody]

Thinking about how fucking ridiculously kind Dante is.

Trish lured him to Mallet Island through manipulation which lead to him “killing” (we know Vergil survived but he didn’t) his brother but he still forgave her and offered her his kindness, empathy, and even trust and friendship. His kindness impacted Trish so much she was able to become her own person outside of Mundus’ influence. Speaking of helping people change for the better, in DMC X he fights Credo and even though this guy is out for his blood he only wants to help him change his ways and manages to convince him to do the right thing. Which I think is what lead to him protecting Nero in his last moments. The canonicity of DMC X isn’t stated but considering the fact that we know Dante was originally supposed to have a longer campaign I can’t help but think a lot of the stuff in that game is remnants of those scrapped ideas.

He very openly felt bad for Griffon when Mundus killed him despite the fact that he’s loyal to the guy who killed his family and even gave him a respectful sendoff in DMC5. Generally he’s known for roasting his opponents but he still has a level of respect for them which I think is cool. In the first novel he even laments about the people who had to die on his missions, as he despises unnecessary bloodshed even if it involves bad people and popularized showing mercy among the other mercs in the business.

In the anime he often takes on jobs for free out of the kindness of his heart and is happy just being able to help people who need it even if he’s broke. Most of the money he DOES get goes to victims of demon attacks like Grue’s daughters and Enzo who lost his arm because he feels immense guilt for not being able to do what he feels like is enough for them.

He’s shown to be very protective of the younger generation through Patty and does everything he can to shield her from seeing him fight demons because he doesn’t want her to be traumatized like he was at a young age. He does the same thing with Nero, really, trying to keep him from fighting Vergil because he believes the result will either be his nephew getting hurt or him killing his own dad and having to live with that trauma like he did after he thought he killed Vergil. The way he looks at Nero and Kyrie fondly at the end of DMC4 before leaving Fortuna, he was willing to do whatever it took in order for Nero to keep that happy life with her. (Side note, Dante grew attached to Patty like, immediately. 15 minutes in he’s like “WHERES MY DAUGHTER?!” He’s so silly like that.)

It’s nice to see Nero is following in Dante’s footsteps too. In an interview it was stated Nero only really stepped into action in DMC4 because he wanted to protect Kyrie but in DMC5 we see a much more mature Nero who cares about civilians too, my favorite example being how he offered a total stranger food because he assumed he was just hungry. Dante in DMC3 was in a somewhat similar situation, though he was obviously a lot more selfish starting off than Nero ever was until he matured by the end of the game and took on the role of humanity’s protector like Sparda. It was his journey of “waking up to justice” like his dad.

Uhh… yap over. I typed this at 3 AM.

[kiwriteswords]

My "Unpopular" Aaron Hotchner Opinions*

*My opinions, solely! I am not trying to discredit anyone else's headcanons, thoughts, etc.! These are just my thoughts, which I was encouraged to share despite being really terrified to share some of them because they go against the grain.

Also, some of these are NSFW!

Aaron Hotchner would not date someone who was in their twenties. As much as my twenty-something-year-old self would love that, I don't see him realistically picking a partner with such a significant age gap.

Reasonings:

Hotch is a profoundly introspective and careful man. He would hesitate if he felt the age gap could lead to judgment or imbalance in the relationship. He would also be hyper-aware of the psychology behind older men gravitating toward younger partners.

He would worry about differing life stages (e.g., career ambitions, desire for children), causing long-term complications.

Aaron Hotchner would not date a member of the BAU.

Reasonings:

As the leader of the BAU, Hotch holds himself to high ethical standards. He’d worry about how a romantic relationship with a subordinate could appear, not only to his team but also to higher-ups in the FBI. He would not want to waver the team's or his superior's trust.

Hotch has a need to keep work and personal separate as much as possible; these blurred lines don't seem like something I could see Hotch crossing.

Aaron Hotchner would not be as dominant in the bedroom as one would think. However, he would lean more into this if his partner was into it, but not outwardly for himself, as I often read.

Resonings:

While Hotch is a natural leader, he does not seek power for power's sake--it's always about responsibility and protection. A lot of his natural leadership qualities come as a trauma response, and I believe he might let that down entirely in an intimate setting.

Hotch’s romantic and sexual relationships would likely be an outlet for him to shed his professional stoicism and connect authentically. He wouldn’t want to bring elements of authority or control into that space, as it would conflict with his desire to be vulnerable.

Aaron Hotchner would not want to be called "Daddy" in the bedroom; again, he may lean into this if his partner was for it, but I do not see him outwardly wanting this.

Reasonings:

As a leader, Hotch is very aware of power dynamics and strives to ensure equality and fairness in all relationships. He would probably be uncomfortable with any dynamic that places him in a position of authority or dominance, particularly one that invokes paternal connotations.

The show strongly implies that Hotch’s relationship with his father was strained and possibly abusive. He has mentioned that his father was strict and may have instilled a fear-driven form of respect rather than genuine love. Given this background, it’s unlikely Hotch would want to emulate any dynamic reminiscent of a “father figure” in a non-familial, intimate context. It might even be triggering for him.

Aaron Hotchner would likely not be the fantastic father we all write about if it were not for Haley's death and Jess's support.

Reasonings:

Hotch’s transformation into a great father was largely a result of Haley’s death, forcing him to reprioritize and step into a role he might not have fully embraced otherwise. While he always loved Jack, the tragic loss gave him no choice but to confront his shortcomings and dedicate himself to being there for his son. If Haley had lived, Hotch’s role as a father would likely have remained secondary to his career, with much of the emotional and practical parenting responsibilities falling to Haley.

The Jess of it all also comes down to writing, for the writers to plausibly continue having Hotch be this great leader and agent while also stepping up to the plate as a father. He realistically could not do it both.

On this note, I hate how villainized Haley is in the fandom. Haley wasn’t a villain—she was a woman who made a difficult but necessary decision for her and Jack’s well-being. Her divorce from Hotch doesn’t diminish her love for him or her sacrifices as a partner and mother. It highlights the complexities of relationships and how even two people who care deeply for one another can struggle to make it work under extreme circumstances. Blaming Haley oversimplifies their story and ignores her humanity.

Aaron Hotchner and Beth lacked chemistry, and it felt very OOC for Hotch to be so unaffected by their parting ways; this is more a flaw in the writing versus the character(s) or fandom.

Reasonings:

Beth was introduced abruptly and with minimal background, leaving her character feeling one-dimensional. The audience didn’t have enough time to understand her motivations or personality, making it difficult to invest in her relationship with Hotch. She felt more like a plot device to show Hotch moving forward post-Haley than a fully realized partner for him. This, again, falls on the fact that Bellamy Young had moved onto Scandal, and they were forced to end things with that plot, so who knows where it actually would have ended up. 

Their dynamic felt almost too casual, which was jarring considering Hotch’s usual intensity in his relationships, especially after Haley’s death. Also, I think Hotch might be suspect of the idea of someone kind of watching him in the park for so long? But I do feel like the writers had no other way for Hotch to realistically meet someone.

Beth’s role could have been an opportunity to explore how Hotch balances dating with being a single father and leading the BAU. Instead, their relationship was surface-level and didn’t push Hotch toward any real emotional growth. The writers didn’t use Beth to challenge Hotch’s guarded nature or explore how he might rebuild trust and intimacy after Haley’s death. Too much was going on during this season and the following, but they opened the door for this and did nothing. 

When Beth and Hotch part ways, Hotch appears surprisingly unaffected, which feels out of character. Given his emotional depth and the weight he places on personal relationships, fans expected more from him—if not heartbreak, at least some introspection or acknowledgment of the loss. This lack of reaction felt less like a natural response for Hotch and more like the writers were rushing to close a subplot they didn’t know how to continue.

I have more, but figured I would ease into this!

[akascow]

okay so

i think the viktor and mel hallucinations during jayce's whole Moment in 2x07, their eyes are just completely black. and its VERY faint but u can KIND OF see the outline of their irises if u look REALLY close (irl)

to show u what i mean:

first ones are just normal settings (tho my computer brightness is all the way up), i only messed with the exposure n highlights of the pictures and stuff in the middle ones, and outlined the eyes in the third ones

​which could make sense in terms of his mental state i think ? he maybe feels like he let them down, or betrayed them or couldnt help them in a way ??

they dont feel human to him anymore. or maybe hes created these images so theyre judging him as he can only reminisce on what happened and how he left things

mel’s vision looks maybe like either angry, stubborn, strong willed or annoyed lol... her chin is kinda turned down, with downturned eyebrows, and her lower lids are halfway closed implying that shes like glaring or narrowing her eyes at him, her lips almost look pursed together and i think ? her nostrils are flared but its so hard to tell lmao we only get like three frames of over exposure HAAH take these with a grain of salt lmfao

viktor (even tho i cannot for the life of me read his expression HAHA) to the best of my ability i think kinda looks hurt or confused, maybe innocent for lack of a better term or scared. ((which given how he left jayce it would kinda fit lmao)) BUT his brows are ever so slightly scrunched together, one is higher than the other which usually implies confusion or thinking or admiring. eyes are wide open, mouth is agape a teenie bit, these are usually seen with softer, positive or more admirable expressions, and his chin is tilted upward. im not trying to turn this into a jayvik thing i swear im just comparing to my facial recognition knowledge HAHA

and as he loses himself deeper in the hexcore, the more he starts losing and/or fearing the two ppl he loved most ? ... and worries how he’d get back to them (if at all) and how he would imagine they would react.

the two ppl who not only made and brought him to who he is today, but uplifted and supported and stood by him for ~10 years despite everything

anyway this theory would all pair nicely with the voices that start playing in the background during his lil Montage lmao it kind of culminates into a massive guilty conscious, that then outwardly presents itself in their hallucinations:

“i never asked for this” - jayce to viktor, after their conversation about him breaking their promise about destroying the hexcore, resulting in vik leaving him lmao. also jayce literally turned viktor into this metal husk so hes gotta have that sitting on his shoulders too lmfao

“[heimer] was my mentor, and i betrayed him” - jayce (to mel) abt voting heimer off the council despite heimer ending up being completely right about magic in the first place

“it corrupts” “you must destroy it” “ive seen nations destroyed” - heimer about the hexcore, jayce screams over this as those lines play, anguishing over the fact that he literally did this to himself and hes the reason Piltover is (or will be) no more bc he ignored the warnings

“its your time now jayce” “perhaps its time for the era of magic” - mel to jayce, context is in the quotes HAHA. jayce is screaming no! no! and please! during these lines, i think its just to hammer (pun intended) home on the fact that it all ties back to him for ‘creating’ magic. its on HIM (at least in his own mind) for the destruction of Piltover and all of its people

maybe im just thinking too hard about it idk (im not). or unless this was extremely obvious to the average viewer HAHA. in my defense i spent this whole montage pausing every .6 seconds to take a picture of seggsy and broken and whimpering jayce so i wasnt really paying that much attention to it all AHAHA

anyway do u think this was a hallucination or was it actually the mage standing here with him for a flash lmao

okay sorry for that long ass post i would add a page break sooner but it would interrupt my flow of thoughts that i need u all to experience like i do HA

[kurishiri]

Jude chapter 3 silly but kinda detailed summary

꒰ ִ ֺ ⊹ @ notice ⊹ ֺ ִ ꒱ any pretty translation you may see in here may not be 100% accurate or contain creative liberties due to characterization or narrative flow purposes. this is a sort of summary as well. if you enjoy, though, please consider reblogging, but please don’t repost these or claim these as your own!

kate successfully completes sortin out letters so she heads to the port where jude is talking with the foreman. its there she sort of thinks back on her time at raven co and the long and short of it is that jude, as the ceo, is actually really outstanding, and he acknowledges the efforts of those who work hard, produce results and whatnot, and rewards them in turn.

(that said he could work on his wording ,,)

time skip to night after judes done and they all walkin back tgt where kates like “i think i’ll be able to have a good dinner today” and jude scoffs at her callin her a twit. and shes all defensive like hey whats wrong with wanting to eat good food and judes like when did i say that was wrong?

all of a sudden they stop in their tracks and jude tells kate “on the count o’ three, crouch” and kates all panicked like tf is going on but jude already starts counting down so she crouches anw (in a panic!)

some guy in a suits out to kill jude. god knows who too bc apparently jude don’t know him either 💀

Jude: Who are ya? Can’t say ya look familiar.

[ insert some lines im lazy to tl ]

Jude kicked up at the man’s chin, causing the man’s body to do one smooth flip before collapsing onto the ground.

Man in a suit: Jude… Jazza——!

Jude: N’ like I was sayin’, who the hell are ya?

ok turns out jude does remember him in the end, its just another dude who broke his contract with jude and was selling up some illegal drugs and whatnot.

Jude: I told ya, didn’t I? That if ya breach your contract I’d show ya so much o’ hell you’d wish you kicked the bucket?

J: I fulfilled that promise for ya. Havin’ a grand old time in hell, aren’t’cha?

omg he pried open the wound on the mans face and he let out a cry to the night sky that could shake anyone’s soul silly.

kate then thinks or foreshadows (yk how like ikevil stories r kinda told like kate is recalling the past? like “i didn’t realize it then, but xyz” kinda like one of those moments) that what she witnessed that night was but a prologue of what’s to come bc they get attacked over and over again.

kate and jude get into another argument like “i feel im gonna die every time! im at my limit!” and judes like “well ur in the way loiterin round like that” then jude just yeets off w/o listenin to another word.

she does feel something bothering her tho

(For someone like Jude, he should be able to avoid these grudges…)

When I thought this, I came up with a theory that relieved me of this unsettling feeling.

(…Could it be he’s making himself an enemy of many on purpose?)

‘Yeah, right,’ was what I thought, but also, somewhere in my heart, I felt such a theory may also be true.

shes like there’s not enough info rn but if i do know anything its that

Kate: At this rate, if I stay with Jude any longer…a hundred lives would not be enough!

and so shes like i gotta learn self defense! so she goes knocking on a certain someone’s door like pls teach me le jutsu of self defense!

Ellis: Okay. （╹◡╹）♡

turns out ellis was also thinking of teaching her some stuff abt self defense soon.

so ellis takes kate to the lobby and kates like why the lobby and ellis goes to a bookshelf to take out a book which actually reveals vics weapon collection and takes out a gun, telling kate to try and hold it.

idk if this is a real gun or not (as in it exists irl), apparently its made of silver with a wooden grip.

ellis thinks its well suited for kate. like its lightweight yk. hes like you may need to use it jic. and then hes like

Ellis: But, it’s kind of refreshing.

E: Other than me, Jude seems pretty adverse to putting people by his side.

E: So, maybe he wants to get along with you?

kates like mmm doubt but at the same time she has this question in her mind w/o an answer of why he went and wrote a whole contract and let her stay by his side then? shes abt to cook up a theory in her head when…

just then jude comes in.

Ellis: Ah——Jude.

Jude: We got a job to do.

so they head off to some noble mansion.

Jude: How do ya do, we’ll be here a while.

Nobleman: Ah, Mister Jude?

apparently this nobleman is connected with the guy in the suit jude beat up in the beginning of the chptr. he made him spit out info.

Jude: If ya just were sellin’ somethin’ shady I’d let that off the hook. Illegal drug’s some child’s play.

J: However.

Jude raised one leg and rested it atop the long table.

Jude: I seem to recall the contract prohibitin’ the sellin’ and buyin’ of humans, or am I wrong?

ko-fi☕️ ┊ comms🤍

[bestworstcase]

So, it should be obvious to anyone paying attention or taking this seriously by now that Whiterose isn't happening. And I mean, they wouldn't really fit with what the show is going for anyways, with romantic relationships, no Ozlem fractals and all that. But it does stick out like a sore thumb, that within RWBY and JNPR they're the only pair of partners where it's not a thing. And I'm curious if you make anything of it, from an out-of-universe perspective, on why that's the case?

well for one thing, i think the conceptual basis for any ship being "well the other three major character academic pairs developed into romantic interests" is a de facto admission of non-canonicity in itself, and betrays a fundamental disinterest in character and narrative. this is perhaps not surprising, as i'm given to understand people have been shipping wr literally since the color trailers, which is to say that the core appeal has always been aesthetics.

full disclosure, my personal feeling is that wr is "man and woman breathed near each other one time!?" for sapphics. it's gay ruby/jaune. the ship isn't sunk, it's dry-docked.

in that sense, the out-of-universe perspective i have to offer is: the difference between ruby/weiss and arkos / renora / the bees is that the latter three were written with romantic intent from the start whereas ruby and weiss were not. i'll grant the possibility that the academic pairings were an inelegant plot device motivated by that romantic intention, but i don't in fact believe that is the case because the one/two/four motif is such a thematic workhorse for the contortions and distortions of ozpin's psyche; i think pairing the romantic partners was at most a secondary consideration. in any case, there is no rule dictating that every academic pair must eventually kiss. that's nonsense.

now. in the more specific sense of "why do these two characters in particular not go together" i think there are two reasons.

first, it's narratively important for ruby to be isolated. she's two years younger and left all her friends behind to enroll in beacon early and her big sister isn't and can't be her mom anymore and she gets paired up with an academic overachiever who initially treats her like an idiot baby who doesn't deserve the responsibility she's been given. ruby surmounts each of these challenges by remaking herself into their serious, competent, trustworthy leader and crucially this does not address, but in fact reinforces, her alienation from the rest of the team.

second, both ruby and weiss are profoundly sheltered and lonely girls raised in environments, denied close relationships with anyone but their elder sisters whom they both grew to idolize, and became, in contrasting but fundamentally similar ways, really good at performing the "right" behaviors—ruby adopting a happy, carefree mask, weiss becoming an overachieving perfectionist obsessed with her family's honor.

the point is, a) neither have ever had a real, emotionally close friendship before, and b) both have a deeply-ingrained tendency to Perform To Expectation. in this i think it is instructive to compare the conflict and resolution between weiss and ruby vs weiss and blake:

blake directly and overtly challenges weiss on her awful behavior until the brick wall of regurgitated bigotry breaks down and weiss starts to talk about the real emotional pain behind that wall, and blake reveals her own secret and then flees in distress, with the result that weiss has to face and think about the pain she's caused to someone she cares about and actually reflect on things blake said to her for a while. and then when they come face-to-face again weiss stops blake from anxiously trying to apologize / explain / appease her and says no, i thought about it, i trust you, you don't owe me any of that. she doesn't say the words "i'm sorry" but her actions demonstrate real understanding and empathy for blake.

meanwhile her conflict with ruby tears down ruby's self-confidence, ultimately leaving ruby receptive to ozpin's extremely destructive advice, and ends because port dresses weiss down and lays out for her in plain terms that her envy and resentment reflect poorly on her, whereafter weiss commits to becoming "the best teammate [ruby will] ever have."

spot the difference. the conflict between weiss and blake fosters a deeper, lasting emotional connection between them chiefly because they're fighting with each other—there's this back-and-forth, give-and-take that drives a resolution from within. weiss has to reflect on herself and decide that what she believed about faunuskind is wrong. and the. she has to decide for herself how to make it right. but that's not what happens in the conflict between weiss and ruby! weiss is just being a bully and gets told by a teacher she respects to knock it off!

and then little miss overachieving perfectionist pivots to "i will be the perfect teammate!" while the lesson ruby takes from this experience, courtesy of ozpin, is that she deserved to be treated that way because she didn't take her duties as the team leader seriously enough. she puts on a happy face and pretends nothing hurts because that's who ruby is, but the resolution here is very much just papering over the cracks.

not to say that ruby and weiss aren't truly friends and don't care deeply for each other, because they are and they do, but the foundation of this friendship is very brittle. on the surface, they appear as virtually the platonic ideal of what huntsman academy partners are meant to be—an unlikely pair who overcame enormous personal differences to become inseparable comrades-in-arms—but that is in large part because ruby's skill in masking problems harmonizes so well with weiss's drive to be the perfect huntsman academy partner.

but they're really not that close! it's a meme at this point for wr shippers to bemoan the dearth of "moments" between ruby and weiss, but that is by design. these are two girls who've never had a really close friendship before performing close friendship with each other almost flawlessly until the wheels very suddenly and violently fall off in v9, whereupon weiss—who is otherwise an empathetic and emotionally insightful person—realizes this hollowness and reflects on her treatment of ruby just as she did with blake back in v1. her perfect partnership has been an emotional burden to ruby this whole time, and she has to face that head-on before it can be fixed.

i think they're probably headed for a serious "we're combat partners who fight well together and get along, but are we actually friends?" kind of reckoning that will undoubtedly resolve in the direction of building real closeness, because maybe they're not as close as they believed but they want to have that kind of friendship.

which is like. you know. interesting. the core problem i have with wr fanon and the general insistence in that contingent of the fandom is that the apparent ideal-partnership is Real and trust me, they're totally in love, we're just meant to understand that they're having heart-to-heart conversations and emotionally vulnerable moments with each other off-screen all the time, the complete absence of this in the text is only because the narrative doesn't have the time—as if the narrative hasn't carved out time for arkos and renora and the bees and ruby/oscar, as if it wasn't a deliberate choice to contrast weiss getting scolded for bullying ruby against weiss empathizing and sharing childhood traumas and deep fears and cherished aspirations with blake and yang. like. come on.

the point is that things were "resolved" between ruby and weiss by external pressures that did not foster any real understanding between them, and then nothing ever changed. weiss' friendships with blake and yang pushed her to grow, to mature, but until v9 she and ruby were coasting on that "good leader/perfect teammate" dynamic, stagnant for ruby and a blindspot for weiss.

and this is the narrative reason why ruby and weiss had to be paired during the initiation. looking at it through the lens of "pairing the romantic partners (and the sore thumb of ruby and weiss)" misses the forest for the shipper goggles tree: the academic pairings are the inciting incident for each main character arc. for jaune, it's the first stroke of the ozlem fractal and the tragedy that motivates the rest of his story. for ren and nora, it's the safety of a comfort zone they'll eventually need to leave. for blake and yang, it's finding each other for the first time. for weiss, it's the mistake that will fester until it comes back to bite her to put all her growth in the interim to the test. for ruby, it's the painful experience that pushes her to take on self-sacrificial heroism as her duty.

it's just a device for establishing character pairs that will facilitate long-term development. that three of the four can be grouped together loosely as romantic arcs doesn't inherently mean anything for the one that isn't; to suggest otherwise is to collapse the differences between arkos / renora / the bees (and also ignore the goliath in the room of arkos not being endgame) and imagine a rule where there just isn't one.

for the sake of completeness i will add that coco/velvet is canon and the CFVY novels make a point of them not being academic partners.

[bird-in-the-space]

Echoes of the Unknown

You try to get familiar with the ship's layout and find the ground bridge console. Unintentionally, you became familiar with the Vehicons.

Warnings: some social anxiety, reader trying to be secretive, messy thoughts, and Steve and Carl being rather chill.

Chapter 17

------------------------------------

At the Autobot base, Ratchet stood at the main monitor, observing signals while Optimus and the others patrolled possible locations in search of the Decepticon warship. The trio were at the base with him. There have been no results so far, only growing the anxiety and worry for your and Emily’s wellbeing. 

“Anything yet?” Jack asked. 

“No, nothing,” Ratchet shook his head. 

“You don’t think (Name) might have already been captured?” Raf asked worriedly while helping Ratchet monitor the signals. 

“She’s a smart bot. She looks exactly like them, so she might already be planning how to escape there with Emily,” Miko tried to comfort. 

“We can only hope you’re right. That ship is heavily fortified thus escaping there without notice won’t be easy,” Ratchet said, and the mood fell silent again, with the thoughts of you and Emily still trapped in the Decepticon ship. 

Walking around, you became familiar with the ship. You were first worried that your absence would have been noticed, but it had been around twenty minutes, allowing you to feel more confident. Most of the Vehicons who passed you on the hallways paid no mind to you, when they did, they simply greeted you with a nod and continued being on their way. Maybe these Vehicons were truly simple-minded like the bots say, they look at you only once and seem to believe you are one of them. Either you look perfectly like them, or you have not yet done anything to make them suspicious of you. You figured you would be fine among them and only needed to avoid big-shot cons like Megatron and Airachnid. 

The ship was large — it was also dark and broody. The cons did not like many colors, did they? Or maybe they just preferred an authentic villain look for themselves. 

You knew where most of the things were located, like the main bridge, energon storage, and the med bay, but you still had yet to find the ground bridge console. Was it somewhere where you did not dare to go? You did not know if you had the nerves to stand where any of the cons might realize that there was something off about you. 

You came across a room and walked inside. It seemed to be another storage but for the mining equipment. The giant drills were organized in lines. There were boxes and some monitors. There were three Vehicons. Two were chatting with each other while the third seemed to be checking on the drills, probably for maintenance. This room did not look like a place for a ground bridge console. 

They gave you a nod and paid no further attention to you. You noticed what seemed to be a datapad lying on one of the boxes. Curious, you grabbed it and looked at what was on it. It showed lines of colored cybertronian text. Some were green, some were red, and some at the bottom were colored white. It looked like some kind of list. It was too bad that you couldn't understand anything that the text said, you could only make out the words ‘energon’ and ‘mine.’

It then popped into your head. Was this a list of energon mines? 

The red lines could mean a nonactive or empty mine, while green could mean an active mine, but what did white mean? Is it like an unconfirmed mine?

The bots had trouble keeping their energon storage full, so this could really help them, but how will you get this to them without stealing and giving away your cover? You could try to use your memory, but you did not have that great memory. There’s no way you would remember this correctly, especially when you were not fully familiar with the cybertronian language. 

Just how? 

You glanced around the room and then noticed something move in what seemed to be a vent. You took a closer look and realized it was Emily. An idea then popped into your head.

You walk closer to the vent and then turn around so that your back and the content of the datapad are shown to Emily. Carefully, you motioned her to take a picture of the list. She seemed to take the hint because you then heard a couple of clicks from her camera. She then gently tapped on the metal to sign that it was done. 

You released a relaxed sigh. Now you have something to bring back to the bots once you get off this ship. 

“Hey did you hear? That spider lost the human,” you heard one of the vehicons say. 

“Really?” 

“She was seen looking around for something. She seemed really agitated so the human had to have escaped her,” he explained. 

“What does Lord Megatron think of it?” his friend asked. 

“He doesn’t know yet. We were told not to tell him,” he replied. 

“Why? He would be angry to know that there is a loose human in his ship,” his friend questioned. 

“Well, at least, this time, it would not be our fault,” he shrugged. 

You listened carefully. It seems the Vehicons loved to gossip. Maybe Megatron not knowing about Emily yet will work in your favor. 

“Hey, you!” you looked up and saw the two vehicons looking at you. “What do you think?” one of them asked. 

You nearly went stiff from the attention. Just why? Why did they have to turn their attention to you now?

You carefully thought about your answer. “Must be one sneaky human if they were capable escaping someone like Airachnid,” you said, hoping your voice did not make them suspicious of you. Your voice was a bit higher and female-like. 

“That’s true. It’s too bad that this is a flying ship. There’s no way for the human to get off without jumping off the ship,” he said. “It would be worse if Megatron orders the human to be found,” he added. 

“Hate to be that human right now. I nearly feel bad for them,” his friend said. 

“Hey, what’s your number designation? I do not believe we have seen you before,” the vehicon asked, causing you to nearly panic. How on earth were you supposed to know your number designation?! You tried to think what to say. You do not think you could grab a random number like one from Star Wars to make them think you have one, they might check if it's authentic.  

“Why you wanna know?” you asked, the question coming out a bit cautious and mean. 

“Is there a problem knowing your designation?” he asked, not sounding offended by your tone. 

“Since we’re at war with the Autobots. There’s a high chance we might end up dead sooner or later, so why bother remembering someone’s designation when you might never see or talk to them again,” you explained. 

“That was a bit dark,” his friend chuckled. 

“Then that just means we just have to make the best of the time we have,” the vehicon spoke, oddly positively. 

“If you don’t like your number designation. We can also use our own designations,” he said. “My name is Steve and this is Carl,” he introduced himself and his friend. 

You were taken back for a moment. “Aren’t those human names?” you asked. 

“They are, but we like to use them on our time when we don’t need to go on missions or fulfill other tasks,” the vehicon ‘Steve’ explained. 

“And that’s… allowed in here?” you tilted your head curiously. 

“It is when we keep it to ourselves. What can human names do to our cause?” Steve replied, then looked toward you. 

“Say… your voice sounds rather femme-like,” he pointed out. 

You mildly panicked. You knew the word ‘femme’ meant female.  “My voice is just the way it is. Is there something wrong with that?” you asked rather defensively. 

“No, not at all. It’s just… does that mean you… feel like you’re a femme?” Steve asked. 

You tried to progress what he just asked. Oh my god, did he just ask if you identify as a woman? Can you be even considered a transwoman? You know enough about cybertronian biology that they don’t have reproductive organs like humans do so in what kind of category do you belong now? Your body’s con was probably a mech. You identify as a female and had no such problem as a human, but now as a con. You were not certain. 

For god’s sake, you need to ask Ratchet once you get out of here. Your brain felt like it was going to go on overdrive. 

“Ugh… Maybe….” you uttered quietly. 

“Ah! Well, that’s nice. Didn’t know we have a little sister among us,” Steve said enthusiastically. 

You felt both baffled and relieved by his reaction. Damm, these vehicons were kinda chill when it did not come to fighting. 

“Don’t worry about us. If you do not feel comfortable us telling anyone, then we keep your secret,” he added. 

You felt glad, but now you could imagine Emily laughing at the whole scene.

“So… do you at least have some name we call you?” Steve asked. 

“Ugh… ��� you hesitated, then remembered Miko’s suggestions. 

“Mau… veillica,” you said, intending to use the color but then your mind fell to that rock band. 

“Mauveillica? Hm? A bit unusual, but it’s nice,” Steve nodded. 

“Thanks…” you uttered. 

“So, Mauveillica, did you forget to have your energon rations today? Sometimes being hungry can cause moodiness,” Steve asked. 

“I forgot,” you answered. 

“Then let’s go then. Let us also tell you the latest gossip that has been happening,” Steve threw his arm around your shoulder. You helplessly followed them out of the storage room, listening to Steve and Carl talk and gossip about the other cons. You were both baffled and nervous by the whole thing. This was not exactly what you had in mind. 

[geospiral]

The stage was always Luka’s world, and everyone else was just living in it.

Luka’s first round in the 50th Alien Stage competition was the fourth round, but really it should have been the second given the predetermined matchups. The Segyein were saving his round for later in order to excite the in-universe audience to the previous winner’s grand return.

(There is no dimmed profile in the second bracket.)

Luka being set up to go against either Mizi or Sua was absolutely intentional; the Segyein knew whoever came out of Round One would be an easy target for Luka’s manipulation, which, in their eyes, would make for a good show. When organizing the rounds, it seems like the Segyein try to go for which setups will elicit the biggest emotional responses out of the contestants. They clearly already knew about Mizi and Sua’s intimate relationship with the fact that the contestants’ profiles are most likely created by the Segyein with little to no input from the humans themselves (probably made with the help of the ever-present camera flowers in Anakt).

(translation)

This would also explain why Sua and Ivan were so certain about Mizi going up against Sua in the competition despite them not being told about the round matches yet.

(Take this with a grain of salt because it is possible they were already told who was against whom before this comic, but given how young they look, I'm thinking that it's probably too early for them to know.)

(translation)

If Luka weren’t in this year’s tournament, they would have probably set Till up against Mizi in Round 5 instead since the Segyein are aware of how much she means to Till. They technically could have still done that with Luka in the competition and had Round 6 be him vs. Ivan, but they most likely didn’t want to save Luka’s signature act until the final round, which the Segyein would have believed themselves to be doing given how they don’t seem to know how important Till is to Ivan (probably intentionally on Ivan's part).

(Text: "Intimacy: 70% It feels like I'm being chased all the time, but I can't find any evidence, so the teachers only suspect me!!! I'm so pissed!! He's always done things I don't like, and I don't understand... Anyway, he's a bother.)

Note: While I think the character profiles were probably made by the Segyein, I don't think the intimacy levels from the artbook are. I'm showing Till's intimacy level for Ivan to highlight his comment about the teachers not believing him when he says that Ivan is constantly following him around.

The Segyein knew the two were friends at least, but that seems about it. Maybe that was enough for them to be a possible sixth round setup if they came out of 2 and 3 victorious, but given the vast potential there was for Luka vs. Ivan after a Mizi vs. Till round, I don't think the Segyein knew the depths of Ivan and Till's relationship and therefore didn't care until it became blatantly obvious after the canon Round 6 and could be capitalized upon for the finale.

From a meta perspective, an Ivantill round was obvious, but my personal opinion is that in-universe I think that matchup was more akin to a happy little accident on the Segyein's part.

This is also all ignoring the huge elephant in the room, which is the Rebellion throwing a wrench into the competition.

I think the biggest change in the direction of the competition (not the results of the rounds but in how the rounds themselves were organized) due to the rebellion was how the Segyein decided to have the finale be mere hours after Round 6. If the fifth round hadn’t been interrupted, I think that the sixth would have been performed right after, like how the first four rounds were. Also, I don’t think they would have tried to aid Luka in his manipulation by throwing up pictures of Ivan on the screens and would have just left him to his own devices like in Round 5. But the Segyein wanted to lure the rebels out to save Till, so basically flashing a big sign that says, "THIS GUY IS MESSED UP FROM THE LAST ROUND AND WILL DIE IF YOU DON'T DO SOMETHING" was probably the best way to do it.

This is all to say that I think it's a lot more interesting if Luka was being set up to be the winner the entire time. Obviously he still had to work for it, but I like the idea that almost everything was set up in his favor; he just had to take advantage of it. The Segyein wanted a good show, and Luka knows how to perform. He did not disappoint them.

[lavender-butterfly-cookie]

https://www.tumblr.com/lavender-butterfly-cookie/767407222529671168/shadow-of-wrath-beast-yn-cookie?source=share

Had an idea based off this...imagine if, instead, y/n blamed themselves for not being able to save the beasts and basically became a shell of their former self...depressed, staying at home, just laying around, crying, self isolating and stuff...and the moment the beasts pull up and blame y/n, they quickly discovered they just made it 50x worse so they gotta calm y/n down and drag em out of their depression...and to get back the y/n they once knew and loved.

Bonus: also it becomes a journey of self discovery for the beasts too as they slowly try to build their poly back up and adapt to their new selves as they try to get y/n over the traumatic experience of being forced to banish them...and the beasts showing y/n...it's not their fault.

Finally quitting the blame game

Y/N cookie, despite knowing it was for the greater good, still hadn't forgiven themselves for having their friends sealed away. They could've done more, in their perspective, to find a better solution. They still have dreams of how that day could've gone. Although they can't see how they'd do it, they could see a better result. A result that they failed to achieve. And it was all their fault.

What made it worse was when they came face to face with the beasts once again. They could see and feel the anger and hurt of their fallen allies and the fact that they too blamed Y/N cookie for this was enough to push them over the edge. In the heat of the moment, they fell to their knees, repeating how it was their fault. This was unexpected, to put it in simpler terms. The beasts didn't realized their words would have this effect, but they knew they didn't like it.

In reality, they knew it was their own fault for what happened, even if they'd never admit it aloud. But the fact that Y/N cookie was taking all the blame. The scene caused the beasts to feel something they hadn't felt in a long time. Guilt. With that said, they wanted to reassure them that it wasn't their fault. Even if they were still bitter about the betrayal, they didn't want to hurt Y/N cookie.

Bear in mind, when a cookie has fallen into a deep stage of depression and believe their at fault for everything, it's hard to convince them otherwise. Especially when they had lived with that mind set for centuries. All the beasts had trouble comforting and reassuring Y/N cookie. Sometimes it felt like they were talking to a wall.

Shadow Milk cookie tried explaining why it wasn't your fault. He'd sit on the edge of your bed whilst you lay there crying and hugging the pillow to your chest. He'd make little puppet shows emphasizing that you weren't to blame for what happened. You convinced yourself that he was deceiving you, that he didn't mean any of it and that he was just playing tricks on your heart. But he swears of his life he's telling you the truth. He's a liar, yes, but do you really believe he'd lie to you of all cookies?

Mystic Flour cookie also offered a lot of therapeutic assistance when she took you to the ivory pagoda. She talks about how she and the other beasts views had changed overtime and that although they were still upset you had them sealed away, they knew you were only trying to do the right thing. Even if she doesn't see what the right thing to you is. Cloud hatae and Peach Blossom cookie also helped in calming you down when you seem to overwhelm yourself by blaming yourself. If you had been any other cookie, she'd be so apathetic and simply solve the issue by turning you to flour. But she'd never. Not to you.

Saying that comforting others was not Burning Spice cookies cup of tea was an understatement. Can't you just get it together or something? Well apparently you can't. And the spice tribe leaders aren't exactly good at it either. With little to no options he turned to Golden Cheese cookie, who advised him to leave you in the care of the Kulfi monkeys. At least they'd have some kind of use now, he thought. Guess he was lucky he didn't go after them to crumble them. The kulfi's were all pretty good at providing comfort to you too, even giving you some lassi. When you witness destruction growing in your heart, the kulfi's will be there to make sure you don't fall apart.

Unlike the great destroyer, Comfort was Eternal Sugar cookie's middle name! She'd cuddle you, have servants serve you, shower you with love and attention, just be there for you. She wanted to make sure you knew that she didn't really blame you and that it truly wasn't your fault. What you did hurt, yes, but that was all in the past and you did it for the greater good. She'd give you all sorts of treats and gifts. She was like Golden Cheese cookie, but pink and fluffy. And when all was quiet in the night she'd take you for a flight around, hoping the cold air and quiet atmosphere would provide a sense of security. She may be a sloth at times, but for you she's putting in the effort.

Silent Salt cookie had experienced a pretty hard time comforting you. Mainly because he couldn't use his words. Regardless of that, he found his ways. Sometimes you can find the most peace in the silence after all. A good nighttime walk in the forest was nice, and so was star gazing. One thing he wasn't gonna allow was you trying to crumble yourself from the depression. He's stopped you a couple of times.

The beasts want to help you. but there's one thing that they know would help you that they refuse to do. They need to apologize. And frankly, none of them are quite ready for that just yet.

[bamber344]

Consequences

prev

masterlist

:) sorry not sorry

anyway i said this would be a steve chapter but it turned into an andreas-steve-jordyn type of chapter because i just really like flipping the perspective all the time to be honest, it's like an addiction

enjoy the chapter tho!!!

CWs: living weapon whump, no-holds-barred beatdowns, broken bones, other grievous injuries associated with aforementioned beatdowns, manipulation, panic attacks, hospitals

Consequences

Andreas stepped out of the elevator into the surveillance room hoping to find someone to mark down G-7’s training results for the day, but was displeased to find it entirely unmanned. What was even worse was the fact that the elevator camera seemed to be switched off. Someone around here was getting a warning, that was for sure.

The door to the subject development room opened and Cheryl stepped out. She smiled at him once she noticed his presence.

“Oh, Andreas! Good to see you!” she greeted.

“Who was on shift to man the surveillance desk?” he asked, putting a stern lilt into his voice.

Cheryl glanced at the chair and seemed to only just now notice that it was empty. “Oh. Arthur said he would look after things. Where did he go?”

Andreas frowned. “Who the hell is Arthur?”

Cheryl blinked at him. “Uh, the new guy…? I ran into him on the elevator down here.”

Cold dread settled into Andreas’ gut. He powered towards the surveillance desk, sitting down and waking up the computer. “What did he look like?”

“Um, white, mid to late forties, brown hair sort of medium length, I guess? Kinda shaggy, in any case. He had a bit of stubble and a moustache, and some freckles on his nose. Why, what’s wrong?”

“I haven’t hired anyone new in almost a year. He was a spy.”

Andreas navigated to the saved surveillance footage as Cheryl freaked out behind him, finding exactly what he feared: everything from the last hour or so had been deleted. The little snake wasn’t totally incompetent, at any rate. It was just unfortunate for him that Andreas already had a good clue as to his identity.

Steven Matthews would regret ever showing his face in Andreas’ precinct.

—

Andreas entered G-7’s quarters without knocking and came across the exact scene he’d been expecting, based on what he’d seen through the cameras. The girl was sprawled out over her bed, half-dressed and completely knocked out. It wasn’t surprising that she was especially fatigued, considering all of the extra training and patrolling she’d been doing to make up for her failure with G-5, and since she’d been forbidden from having dinner tonight, he didn’t doubt that she found sleep a much more enticing option than staying up and enduring her hunger. She looked almost peaceful, in a dishevelled, snoring, drooling-on-the-pillow sort of way, and a small part of Andreas almost felt bad about having to wake her up. Almost.

He kicked the leg of the bed frame, rattling the whole thing. “Wake up, Seven!”

G-7 jerked awake with a yelp, scrambling to her feet and standing at the ready. “Y-yes, sir!”

“Put your armour on. I have a job for you.”

—

Steve rolled his neck and shoulders, trying to work his anxiety out on the elevator ride up to his apartment. He was almost certain no one had been following him back; by all accounts, he should be safe. Still, he just couldn’t get the nagging feeling of oncoming dread out of the pit of his gut.

He sighed and tried to ignore it. The fact of the matter was that there was nothing he could do either way. Whether he was about to release the information he found and save Jordyn from Andreas’ clutches, or wake up in an unmarked grave and slowly asphyxiate tomorrow morning, it was now out of his hands.

Steve exited the elevator and trudged down the hall, fishing his keys out of his pocket. His hand touched the USB as he did so, and he pulled it out along with the keyring. Inside that tiny piece of plastic and circuitry was enough evidence to launch an official investigation on de Vygon and all of his cronies, and rip all of this evil out at the root. Or maybe that was just him being optimistic. Still, it was certainly a good start.

He unlocked his door and stepped into the dark apartment, flicking on the lightswitch.

Nothing happened.

Steve frowned, flipping the switch on and off over and over. Nothing was changing. The lights in the outside hallway were still on, so it wasn’t like there was a blackout. Had the power been cut to his apartment in particular?

The door slammed shut behind him and he whirled around, only to find no one there. His heart leapt into his throat.

Oh. This was how it was going to go, huh? At least he got to enjoy one last drive before it was all over.

Darkness swept over his vision, completely blinding him right as something sunk into his solar plexus hard enough to lift his feet off the floor. Air rushed out of his chest so fast he almost puked. His knees buckled when he hit the ground again, and his attacker was quick to help him down, striking him across the cheekbone and sending him collapsing into a heap.

They didn’t let up, kicking and stomping on him over and over, refusing to stop even when he got his breath back enough to start crying out in pain. Ribs cracked and splintered. His nose was crushed, his lip split. He tried to predict where the boot would come next and protect himself, and only got snapped fingers for the trouble. A particularly bad hit to the head knocked out his hearing, leaving only ringing in its place. 

The attacker changed target, focusing on his legs. By that point, the hits were starting to blur together, only coming into sharp focus when something broke. His left knee was the first to go, followed by whatever his calf bone was called. He was certain that he knew, but the name just wasn’t coming to him. The femur? No, that was the thigh bone. The humerus was an arm bone, that definitely wasn’t it. It started with an F, he was sure. Vivienne would definitely be able to tell him, if she were there. She was smart like that.

Speaking of his femur, that broke too, and Steve screamed so hard he thought he would choke. It would have been a mercy.

Finally, the beating stopped. The ringing quieted down enough for him to hear his surroundings again, and he could just about make out the sound of distressed panting, almost to the point of sobs. Was that him? No, his breaths were coming in raspy and slow. 

“I’m… s-so sorry,” said a broken, electronic voice.

Huh. That was weird. Steve passed out.

—

Steve Matthews’ twitching, rasping body laid at my feet. His chest continued to rise and fall, and an occasional spasm rocked through his limbs. He wasn’t dead just yet. Thank god.

I still didn’t understand why I had to just… do that. Steve was one of the good guys, right? He was a police officer, working to catch criminals, and yet… Father wanted him ‘dealt with,’ as he put it. He wanted him beaten within an inch of his life. He wanted his legs broken so bad he would never walk straight again. I couldn’t bring myself to go all the way on that one. The screaming from one leg was bad enough. God, I wanted to throw up. But my job wasn’t done.

I clenched my fists, trying to get my breathing under control. I still needed to search him and seize any of the things he had on him when he arrived back. Just… get it done. If I did a good job, maybe Father would feel inclined to reward me, or at the very least, cut back on my extra training and patrol hours. What I wouldn’t do to be allowed another few hours of rest a day. My ribs still ached with every breath, and all I wanted was for it to just stop.

As carefully as possible, I patted him down, removing his phone, wallet, and keys from his person. In his hand was a small plastic… something. I grabbed that, too, just to be safe. Time to make my exit.

Limbs shaking, breath still coming in quick gasps, I made my way towards the window and slipped out the same way I entered, making sure I closed it behind me. Sirens echoed through the distance, no doubt on their way to my location. Steve’s neighbours surely must have heard all the screaming. I just hoped they got to him in time to save him.

Somehow, it only occurred to me then, in the cool light of the moon on the long run back to the facility, exactly what I’d just done. I just tortured an innocent man. I attacked him in his own home, overpowering him and beating him until he was begging me to stop, and even then I continued. That… that sounded like something a criminal would do. Hell, I’d taken down criminals for similar crimes before. How could Father order me to do something like that?

He was Vivienne’s uncle. How was I supposed to face her again after what I’d just done? She was one of the only people who’d ever made me feel safe in her presence, and I just broke her uncle. Why did he make me do it?

I tripped over my own feet right at the edge of a rooftop, tumbling into the alley below and hitting the rail of every fire escape on my way down, crashing into a pile of garbage bags. The fall barely even registered through the ringing in my ears and the pain in my chest. I felt like I could barely breathe, every gasp for air choked off and denied by the stifling prison of my helmet. I clawed at it, finally tripping the latch at the back of my head and tearing it off. Humid night air hit me like a train, and for a second it felt like I could breathe again, but the ache didn’t cease, and the world continued to spin wildly around me. All I could do was lay there, staring up at the sky and contemplating what I’d just done while trying to remember how to push oxygen in and out of my body.

I supposed this was just another one of those things I was too stupid to understand. I wasn’t smart like Father and the scientists. I barely knew how to shovel food into my face without making a mess, let alone comprehend the complexities of crime. If Father ordered me to do it, Steve must have done something truly horrible. He must have. That was the only explanation. I just… needed to stop thinking about it. I would never truly understand it anyway.

Don’t stop asking questions. Don’t take anything at face value. Andreas is gonna try every trick in the book to make you feel like you’re too stupid to understand anything, so why even bother wondering? Don’t let him. You’re smart, Jordyn.

Maggie’s words echoed through my head. Back when I heard them, part of me was tempted to disregard them; just because she was my sister didn’t mean that she really knew me. She didn’t know how stupid I really was. Now, though… I just couldn’t let my actions sit on my conscience. I refused to accept the answer of ‘Father knows best.’ I needed an explanation for what I just did.

But… How the hell was I supposed to get one? Father would break me just as bad as I just broke Steve if I kept talking back like the idiot I am. Was I just supposed to ignore it and pretend everything was okay? How was I supposed to keep going on like this?

It just… felt so hopeless.

There was a bit of time before Father was expecting me back. Not long enough to let everything out, but it would have to do.

I squeezed my eyes shut and started to cry.

—

The walk back to the facility felt like it took ages, and yet at the same time, it was over in the blink of an eye. Before I knew it I was slipping through those doors, scanning my palm against the card reader, and heading down the elevator back home. I couldn’t decide whether or not I wanted to see Father and demand some answers, or never look at him again. Either way, I had to go report to him, so what I wanted didn’t really matter.

I dragged my feet all the way down the halls, finding out from a scientist that Father was waiting for me in my quarters. At least I didn’t have to make any detours before I could strip this armour off and go into a coma for however long I would be allowed to sleep. Better to just get it over with.

Sure enough, when I opened the door and stepped inside, Father was sitting on my bed, looking at me.

“How did it go?” he asked, like he didn’t already know. Like he hadn’t been watching through the camera of my visor the whole time.

“I…” I tried to speak, but the words didn’t come. Just the thought of the pain I’d caused formed a lump in my throat, and nothing could get past it.

Despite not receiving an answer, Father nodded. “Take off your armour, Jordyn.”

I didn’t need more encouragement than that. Piece by piece, I stripped off the black metal and dropped it on the floor like I was shedding the weight of my crimes. Somehow, things started to feel just a little bit better.

“Come here,” Father beckoned once it was all off. I slowly made my way over and sat down on the bed next to him.

“I saw what you did, Jordyn.”

“You were watching?” I asked.

“Of course. I’m always watching while you work. You did good. You did what I told you.”

I sniffed and nodded, not replying.

“It was hard, wasn’t it? Hurting him like that?”

Despite how hard I tried to hold it back, I couldn’t stop my face from scrunching up. The question slipped out before I could stop it.

“Why? Why did I have to do that?”

I tensed up, expecting to be struck. Instead, Father gently put his hand on my knee. I remained frozen, just in case.

“I know it’s difficult for you to understand, Jordyn. I’m not sure I can explain it in a way you will understand. Just know that Mr. Matthews did a very, very bad thing, and he needed to pay the price for it. You don’t need to worry about it beyond that, okay? You leave that to your betters, and just do what you’re told. You’re very good at it.”

The compliment sent shivers of pleasure down my spine, as did the gentle touch of Father’s hand as it moved around my shoulders instead. I did a good job for him. That was the important part, right?

“It didn’t feel good,” I muttered, a few errant tears escaping and falling down my face.

“I know, Jordyn. I know. You’re a gentle soul, aren’t you? But you did a good job, and now you won’t need to worry about it again. Tell you what, we’ll forget about your mistakes in training today, alright? I’ll have some fresh dinner made and brought to you shortly.”

The thought lit off a spark of excitement in my belly, though it was dampened a bit by confusion. “Wh… Why are you being so nice to me?”

Father tilted his head. “You’re my daughter, Jordyn. I know I’m hard on you sometimes, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you. And when you do good for me, I want to reward you.” His smile remained, but his eyes turned a little colder. “Just don’t expect this treatment all the time. You performed a very difficult and important job today, and I recognise that. That’s all. Now, what do you say?”

I nodded. “R-right. Thank you, Father.”

He gently ruffled what little hair I had and stood up. “There’s a good girl. Have a good night, Jordyn.”

With that, he left me alone in my quarters. He was… actually happy with me. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d seen him so proud and receptive of my work. A giddiness I hadn’t felt for months rose up within me, struggling against the overpowering guilt of what I’d done to earn it. I did the right thing, but… it just didn’t feel right. Father wanted me to just forget about it, but was that really possible? Maggie would have wanted me to keep questioning, keep digging and searching until I found out the truth as to why he made me do that.

Both options sounded equally as exhausting. All I really wanted was to sleep.

My stomach growled loudly. …And maybe a good meal, too.

I went about my nightly routine, showering off the sweat and tears and getting changed into some sleep clothes. All that was left was to wait.

Sure enough, Father hadn’t been lying. About half an hour after he left, a piping hot bowl of chilli and rice was delivered right to my door. My favourite meal; he must really have been happy with me.

And yet, when I brought it inside and forced it down at my desk, I could barely even taste it. There was only nausea and the sound of screams.

—-

“Could you tell me your name?”

“St- Steven… Matthews.”

The nurse nodded, writing something down on her pad. “How old are you, Steven?”

Steve frowned, trying to remember the exact number. His head had been a mess of fog ever since he woke up in this room. He had a vague memory of what happened to him to get him sent here, but everything in between was just black.

“47… I think.”

“What’s fourteen plus twenty six?”

The mental maths took a bit longer than it really should have, but Steve thought he could be excused for that, given the circumstances. “Fourty.”

“Alright,” the nurse said, putting her pad down. “Seems like you’re all there. I’ll go get the doctor, and we can go over your prognosis. If you’re in any pain, you can press this button here to get a dose of morphine. Don’t worry about overdoing it; the machine has an inbuilt limiter. Try to stay awake, if you can.”

With that, the nurse left him alone with the beeping of his heart monitor. Hearing it was a little bit of a shock, to be honest. He’d been almost certain that last night would be his… well, his last night on earth. Was it just an accident that he was still alive? Or did de Vygon only intend for him to suffer, and not actually kill him?

Well, if that was his goal, he succeeded. More of Steve was broken than wasn’t; wrapped up in casts, stabilised with metal fastenings, poked full of intravenous drips and covered in monitoring equipment. He was just doing his best not to look at all of the metal braces sticking out of his leg, lest he throw up again like he did when he first woke.

Eventually, the doctor came in and gave him the rundown: in short, he was well and truly worked over. He had a nasty concussion, a punctured lung, three broken fingers, six cracked ribs, a leg so unimaginably shattered that it was likely he’d never walk on his own again, two missing teeth, a crooked nose, a broken collarbone, some lovely internal bleeding, and enough bruising to fill a semi-truck. He couldn’t even remember half of that stuff happening.

The pain wasn’t so bad now that he had morphine coursing through his system, but that was a small consolation in the face of… everything else.

“So… how long will I have to stay here?” he asked.

“It's hard to say at this time, but we're probably looking at a few weeks, at least,” the doctor replied. “The damage to your leg will take multiple surgeries to completely fix, and with injuries like yours, we want to be careful about letting you go too soon.”

Well, that wasn't too bad. It wasn't like he had a job to go back to, anyway.

The doctor finished up and left him to his drugged-up rest. Steve closed his eyes and tried to let the sleep find him. Of course, it was just his luck that Andreas de Vygon walked in at that very moment. The beeping of the heart monitor picked up speed.

“Ah, it’s good to see you’re awake, Steven.”

“Wh… Why are you here?”

He took a seat at Steve’s bedside. “Can’t a police captain visit his detective in his time of need? I heard about what happened. Such a shame that those burglars would pick your apartment, and that you happened to come home right at that time. Apparently, you’re very lucky to be alive.”

Steve tried to scowl, but it wasn’t very easy with how bruised and swollen his face was. “Yeah, I’m sure you know a lot about it.”

De Vygon chuckled. “Fine, if that’s how you want to be. I’ll do you the respect of speaking plainly, then. I know it was you who broke into the facility last night. I don’t have any concrete proof, but I am almost certain that it was you. Why?”

De Vygon could torture him; he wouldn’t say anything. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

De Vygon hummed. “I’m sure. Well, I suppose it doesn’t really matter why. Whatever your plan was has been foiled, regardless. Really, Steven… What were you expecting? That you���d just get to walk away?”

Steve glanced at his leg. “I think I have a solid shot at it.”

De Vygon laughed – actually laughed at that. “Apparently morphine turns you into a comedian. Who knew?”

“Cut the bullshit, Andreas. Why did you come here?”

De Vygon’s face darkened, just for a second, before that business neutral mask slipped right back into place. “Two things, Steven. Number one: Don’t ever show your face at my precinct again, unless you want someone to come and finish what they started. Number two: make sure whoever it is that you’re working for understands the same thing. No one crosses me and gets away with it.”

He stood up, dusting himself off as if merely being in Steve’s presence was enough to dirty him. “I would wish you a speedy recovery, but… Well, that would just be counterintuitive, wouldn’t it?”

With that, he turned and strolled out the door, just as smug as ever.

Fuckin’ prick.

There was a commotion outside just a moment after he left, and Steve heard Vivienne’s voice loud and clear through the thin walls.

“Get out of my way, asshole.”

Steve shut his eyes and prayed that she didn’t do anything stupid. If de Vygon had the slightest inkling that she had even a pinky toe dipped in this mess, she would suffer the same fate that he did.

Thankfully, things calmed down, and a moment later, Vivienne was bursting through the doors, looking on the verge of tears.

“Uncle Steve!”

She rushed over to his bedside, barely holding herself back from pouncing on him with a hug. Steve’s ribs were very grateful for that restraint. 

“Hey, Vivienne.”

“What happened?! We- We were just… I thought-”

“Calm down, Viv. I’m okay.”

“No you’re not, look at you!”

Steve put his casted hand up, trying to placate her. “I will be, okay? Just breathe.”

Vivienne pouted but she did as she was told, sighing and sitting down. “What happened? The person on the phone said someone broke into your apartment.”

Welp, there was no getting out of it now. He told her the truth; that he went into the facility without her.

“B-but… why? I thought we would go in together!”

“Look at me, Vivienne. I knew something like this would happen. How could I have let you come with me, knowing that this was how it would end?”

“I…” Vivienne opened her mouth, but nothing more came out. Clearly, she understood, as much as she so obviously hated it. She let out a sigh. “Do you know who did this to you?”

“No,” he lied. “Just one of de Vygon’s operatives, I assume.”

She looked down, her face scrunching up. “You don’t think… Surely it wasn’t Jordyn, right? Even at his orders, there’s no way she’d do something like this…”

Apparently, she would. What else would explain the darkness that overtook his vision before the assault began, or the metallic voice desperately apologising right before he blacked out? But Vivienne didn’t need to know that. No one needed to know it but him. Telling Vivienne that Jordyn almost beat her uncle to death would only make things harder for what they were trying to do.

“I don’t think so,” he answered.

Vivienne hummed. “Did you at least get anything out of it? Any proof of what’s been going on?”

And there was the kicker. Thankfully, Steve had a little more foresight than de Vygon had bargained for.

“Do you know the library on Cliff street?” he asked.

Vivienne frowned. “Uh, yes?”

“I need you to go in there with a USB. On the computer at the very back, on the left-hand side, you’ll find a file hidden in the documents folder titled ‘PGSN.’ Move it to the USB and take it to the Union. They’ll have a better idea of what to do with it than me. Be careful, though. De Vygon has shown that he’s clearly not messing around.”

 “What’s on the file?” she asked.

“Research notes, by the looks of things,” he replied. “Documenting years worth of experiments Andreas has done on his test subjects, Jordyn included.”

“You mean there’s more?!”

Steve tried to shake his head, but immediately regretted it. The painkillers were making him forget just how busted up his body really was. “No, most of them are dead, aside from the two I saw escape. It seems like he’s trying to create a superhero for some reason. From the sounds of it, he’s literally growing these kids from birth in tubes.”

“Jesus…” Vivienne muttered. “I guess Maddie was right when she wondered if Jordyn was a genetically engineered test-tube baby.”

Steve stifled a yawn. “You should get going, Vivienne. Before de Vygon realises he’s been played. Also, no offence, but I really need to rest.”

Vivienne smiled, though there was pain in it. “Okay. I’ll be back once I’m done, though. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“Don’t you have class or something?”

“What better place to study nursing than in a hospital? I’ll still get my work done, you don’t have to worry.”

Steve grinned, his eyelids growing heavy. “That’s my girl. See you then.”

A quiet pop, and Vivienne was gone.

Finally, some peace and quiet. Steve closed his eyes and fell asleep.

taglist: @steelandblood @sapphicwhump @urnumber1star @alsolucakairomi @idk-whumpalt

@Iamheretohurt @anoyedartist @dontyoubleedoutonme @seastarblue @lettherebepain

@bacillusinfection

wahoo! yippee! whump!

also quite possibly some of the only guy whump in the whole story so far. They can have just a little. as a treat. :)

anyway, hope you enjoyed! let me know what you thought in a comment or reblog! it's v appreciated :3

up next is a MADDIE POV!!!!! my GIRL! my depressed QUEEN! and also the last chapter in this arc :) stay tuned!

[lionydoorin]

when tara can finally stumble her way through a song on guitar, what do you think she learns to play?

liability

i kept thinking and thinking and thinking about this and it made me realize even more how hard it would be for tara to play. like, painfully hard, seeing you almost always need your middle and ring fingers for the chords. so i wasn't sure if tara would start by learning a song she likes or just a random one in an "easy songs to play for beginners" list.

taking this into consideration, she'd probably list a few songs she wanted to learn and check which ones seemed easier to play.

one she wanted to learn (and i think could be the first!) but took a while was dreams by fleetwood mac; not because it was particularly hard, seeing the song mainly focuses on two chords (F and G), but the positions were kinda hard and it hurt a lot when she first tried it.

i wanna say at the point where tara decided to learn how to play, she was giving therapy and physical therapy another try. and whenever she did try to play and her fingers were shaking, her grip wasn't firm, or holding it for more than a few seconds hurt so much she had to open her hand and put the guitar down, it motivated her even more to put an effort into her next physical therapy session.

[cryptocism]

love that Thad interprets inertia to mean continuing at all costs and Three takes it to mean stagnancy, bc theyre both right!! objects in motion saty in motion objects at rest stay at rest just like newton said

exactly yeah! because i knew i wanted Thad to reclaim the name for himself (with the whole "it means what i say it means" mantra) it needed to mean more to him than just a representation of Thawne Legacy Kill The Allens etc.

a reoccurring thing in Frequency that i liked to lean into was this idea of Good Inertia and Bad Impulses (bc Bart and Thad as narrative foils continues to rotate in my brain forever). i think Bart's solo does a cool exploration of both good and bad impulses throughout the run, it's kind of the central conflict of the whole thing, but it's usually in regards to Bart either unwittingly getting himself into trouble or accidentally solving problems by just leaping into everything without thinking twice. but the concept of inertia is pretty exclusively portrayed as negative. which is fair, the phrase "coasting on inertia" is in the lexicon for a reason. but i think it deserved a fair shot - the concept of continuing in spite of everything can actually be a really good instinct when you're in a bad situation. keeping up that momentum, moving forward no matter what, there's definitely something inspirational there that appeals to me.

and an aspect of impulses that didnt get as much spotlight in Bart's solo was the kinds of impulses that recoil at the thought of unpleasantness. the impulse to hide from responsibility, the impulse to distract from pain, to avoid discomfort, etc. (big part of that is because in Bart's solo, most of the worst moments of his life hadn't happened to him yet) so i wanted to explore it a little in Frequency

anyway yeah, Bad Impulses and Good Inertia. which was kinda in conversation with Bart and Thad's dispositions, and how they run counter to typical hero/villain narratives. (Bart doesn't really get people, goes his own way, has pretty emotionally selfish and sometimes violent tendencies when he's pissed off. Thad's much more of a people person, lives for praise and pleasing others, seems to forget to do violence when he's supposed to i.e. that time he put Bart in VR jail even though Bart was completely incapacitated and by Thawne logic Thad should've just killed him. it just... doesn't occur to him as a thing he should do lmao)

[hanzajesthanza]

my attempts to avoid thoughts of geralt's hanza continue to fail, as sapkowski talks about them in front of my face.

(from manuscript, on the subject of the hero and the quest):

On this expedition, the Hero (Simple or King) is accompanied by others who are stereotypical-canonical fantasy characters, in other words - clichés:

Wizard-Mentor (the aforementioned MERLIN, Obi-wan Kenobi, Gandalf, Allanon, Belgarath, Sephrenia or Moiraine, who supports the hero with advice and help); Faithful Servant (in the case of the King, literally, in the case of the Simple, rather a childhood friend, Sam Gamgee. He serves the plot to recite wise folk maxims and prove that the simple people are the most morally healthy; or to save the ass of his master/friend where magic and a sharp sword will not help, and common sense and a strong, faithful arm will suffice). Good Knight (charismatic LANCELOT, always loyal and ready to fight, sometimes with some dark secret in his life); Worse Knight (always with some dark secret in his life, ambitious like Boromir, in the clutches of Evil, secretly collaborates with Evil, regrets betrayal, undergoes catharsis, perishes); Trickster - Conniver (see LOKI in "Materia Magiczna"**), cheerful, but can cause trouble, which attracts like a magnet; Damsel in Distress, who is saved from danger on the way and included in the team. Usually a princess in disguise. For several volumes of the cycle she does not like the Hero, in the last she becomes his wife.

* Type A = Percival, a hero who does not have power and is searching it, and Type B = King Arthur, a hero who has lost his power and wants to regain it. in other words, Type A = Reynevan and Type B = Geralt :)

** another chapter of the book, "Materia magica, or the Little Magical Alphabetical Lexicon," it's a glossary of various myth and legend. in loki's entry, he recounts some myths of loki and equivalates him with other figures across various traditions: Odysseus, Pryderi, Bricriu, Mordred, Alyosha Popovich, Coyote, Anansi, Maui). then he lists a few fantasy/spec fic characters he categorizes as trickers: Cugel (Dying Earth), Kickaha (World of Tiers), Coyote (Coyote Blue), Peter Lake (Winter's Tale), Moonglum (Elric of Melniboné), Nifft and Haldar (Nifft the Lean), Random (Chronicles of Amber), Saruman (Lord of the Rings), Shimrod (Lyonesse), Silk (The Belgariad and The Malloreon), Gray Mouser (Fafhrd and the Gray Mouser), Talen (The Elenium).

my thoughts:

pretty obvious assignments here, for the most part.

regis is the Wizard-Mentor, but, as he soon loses his mystique, his intellectual, philosophizing manner becomes mundane and irritating than providing magical provenance. he advises incessantly, answering questions before they're asked, giving guidance when no one asked. he only appears to be omniscient, and the others may think he's so smart because he's hundreds of years older than them, but is really just a guy, a middle aged man with a troubled youth which he learned from. his advice is not magically guided and for this reason is fallable, mortal, human. maybe the cliché is also played with in that he's a vampire, not a wizard, sorcerer, or priest, "‘I see.’ The poet sighed. ‘Is Regis a sorcerer?’ ‘No. No, not a sorcerer.’" ... as vampires are typically evil and regis is decidedly a force of good. (on this topic, @wampirzielarz once compared-contrasted gandalf and regis and it was super interesting :))

dandelion is a combination of the Faithful Servant and the Trickster. he's geralt's best friend, and doesn't fight alongside him with sword but his presence is necessary to our hero for moral support, that all makes the first part an obvious assignment... and... sapkowski lists a wide variety of tricksters of various moral alignments, but amongst them are some heroes and some best friends of heroes (and anti-heroes). and asides from being geralt's closest friend, dandelion is, after all, a rascal, who uses words and good looks to get what he wants from people. "a cynic, a lecher, a womanizer and a liar." (also, because i think szarlej also fits this double-definition as well, i won't hesitate to give them to dandelion, as they serve pretty similar functions alongside their respective heroes).

milva is the Good Knight, "always loyal and ready to fight" describes her perfectly, and her 'dark secret' was her pregnancy and plans for abortion. (though, the attribution of lancelot... well, maybe this is why some keen eyes saw a potential in yenva). anyhow, the playfulness with the cliché comes from the fact that she's a woman, which is supposed to be surprising that the hero's strongest ally is a woman. i think the "charismatic" attribute is also supposed to be played with here, as milva is simple and not too well-spoken, only so in her cursing. in other words, she's a peasant woman, and not a born-and-bred nobleman. also, for her gender, she is a play on another trope sapkowski mentions a couple of pages later, but i can't go into it now because it's too funny.

cahir is the Worse Knight, though perhaps in reverse, for all of his associations with Evil was in the past and shed like sports colors when he changed teams. he has no betrayal, "I will never betray you, witcher," all of his ‘betrayal’ was before he was even allied with the hero. but of course, for these sins, he "undergoes catharsis, perishes".

the Damsel in Distress is evidentially angouleme, being "saved from danger on the way and included in the team." the rebuking of the cliché, of course, is that geralt is "genuinely angry, genuinely confused, genuinely embarrassed" when she offers her "gratitude" to him. also, that she is no princess in disguise, just an ordinary girl, though she is confused for the princess they're after (who also happens to be another play on the damsel in distress cliché). and again, like milva, i think angouleme is related to another specifically female character cliché sapkowski calls out; but i'll save it for another post.

[moe-broey]

Forever thinking about this panel

He will NOT be accepting hugs for any mundane reason and if you try he will react like he's being hunted for sport

But I am ALSO thinking about

He will give a little sympathetic pat on the back........ if you're feeling down ......

Alfonse physical affection seems to vary and is situational 👍

[peppermintack]

show tempe gang crossover with the morris islanders would actually have been the best episode of bones ever. btw

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

If you've never heard an LRAD go off in person, I *genuinely* do not want to hear your opinion about methods of resistance in the US.

[corvidbunny]

it's so scary wanting to share my stuff bc y'know when i'm writing wyn getting stuffed to the brim its like. i wouldn't be on the grind posting here but also oh god i'd be scared for my life that my muts on main will find my stuff by typing my oc's name in the search bar for fun (bc its a uncommon name, given to fantasy ocs a lot from what i can gather but .)