#she was gonna do an ekg but i refused even after her insisting because i judt wanted to escape so bad | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

themindelectricdemo4 · 1 year ago

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Okay sorry I thought my heart fucking exploded this morning and I literally felt it was swish around and shit oh yeah did I forget to mention I haven't slept in 2 full days and eaten in 24 (this has since been fixed)

#so i went to urgent care with these symptoms ive never felt before in my life #shit that is beyond my anxiety i know my anxiety and it literally happened after i started taking my increased dose of medication #doctor tells me the medication change is a coincidence. its my anxiety and i need to take a walk!#i dont think! i have had a breakdown so serious in awhile and honwstly it was so scary that i kinda forget it all already #i just kept crying and laughing like oh this is.how im gonna get treated for the rest of my life arent i #its my anxiety. its my depression #ill come in with a genuine fucking problem one day and get it blowed off and die #fuck!#i have to wonder what they thought when i left i was acting like a fuckin looney and like my nanas taking me past the nurses desks #and tbeyre staring at me with their thousand beady eyes and im trying to stifle cryong and leaughter #like wow.#i wouldve believe stress increase more than its just my FICKINN anxiety #i brpyght in a list of 24 symptoms i wrote down and theyre just all from anxiety #ueah like my fucking. EYES DILATING TO THE SIZES OF SAUCERS. anxiety. are. you. kidding me #you know maybe it was my anxiety but holy fuck ur just glnna stand there over me and be like take a walk kid ^_^ jt'll stop your #panic attack? i guess thats what i had. idk. i didnt even get any sort of theory on it was #she was gonna do an ekg but i refused even after her insisting because i judt wanted to escape so bad #she just kinda fuckin double tripled whammer there!#1. blames all of my problems on anxiety #with no other way it could be anything else [fancier way of saying youre making it all up #2. she goes on about how i need to find the right batch of meds. lady ive been doing that for 6 years now.#im doing spravato which is a fucling last ditch antidepressant becaise ive tried everything else #but these people who just dont get it like to make it seem i havent even made an effort #ive used dozens of meds #dozens. it terrifies me. what the fuck am i injecting into my body #anyways i lost my train of my tnought yag #back to regular schwdulaedd queue posting (idk whem ill start making new ones we will see)

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