#she told me once and idk if she meant it that the least i could give her is going to college so 😬

[merchelsea]

Hi hi

Can I request a Oscar Piastri sister reader x Lando

Maybe she's older than Oscar by a year and dating Lando, I want it to be angst with fluffy ending cus im a sucker for those 😭 either the reader and lando gets into a fight and they take a break and Oscar ends up being the middle person with a happy ending

Or

Oscar didnt know his sister was dating Lando and she introduces Lando to her family as her bf and oscar's just hurt by how they didnt tell him in advance?? and he starts being petty and ignore them...but it also ends in a happy ending

Idk idk I'm good with any as long as it's angst fluff sorry this is long 😭😭 thank you as welllll <3

family matter — lando norris (+op81)

pairing: lando norris x fem!piastri!reader

summary: you introduced lando to your family, as your boyfriend, and your brother didn’t react as well as you hoped

autor’s note: you guys love a piastri sister x lando story. (well i love writing them so keep the requests coming!

word count: 2k

warnings: angst. sad oscar. swearing.

masterlist | requests

lando stood nervously on the passenger seat, while you drove to the restaurant. he didn’t need to say anything for you to realize how insanely nervous he was.

you told him tonight was the night you would let everyone know what he actually meant to you.

you had been dating for a month and some days, and not telling anyone was crazy, in your perspective. you knew everyone would support you, but you were still a little apprehensive. after all, lando was oscar’s teammate, and you didn’t want to make things at work difficult for neither of them.

it was a good opportunity today because your whole family agreed to go out for dinner after a good home race for oscar. lando got a podium, oscar got fourth place. it was good for the team and for both drivers.

even though there was some controversy.

once you told him, the british immediately panicked. your family loved him, and he was aware, but he couldn’t shake this uneasy feeling.

seeing him so tense, you decided it was better if you drove. you were not completely normal about this either, but you felt this was way easier for you.

as you got closer to the restaurant, you felt like you needed to, at least try to, calm him down.

“they already love you, lan. it’s not like us being together changes their opinion about you.” you looked over at him as you parked the car.

he simply nodded, kissing the back of your hand after holding on to it for a while. you stood in the car a little more.

“you’re right. let’s go.” he finally told you.

you both walked together up to the table. oscar had his back to you, so you hugged him from behind. other members of the family smiled at lando’s figure behind you as you kissed oscar’s cheeks.

“you brought lando?” your mother asked, a smile plastered on her lips as she walked over to hug the british.

“yeah… hm. i wanted to tell you guys, something…” you started, making every one face you except your brother, who you were still holding. “well, me and lando, we are together.” you slowly let go of oscar as he turned around, a serious expression on his face. “as a couple, boyfriend and girlfriend…” someone let out an excited noise and all you could see were smiley faces.

“finally!” your dad said from across the table, coming closer right after and hugging lando in his own way.

the driver was clearly nervous, but way better then before. a soft smile in his lips as he looked over at you.

you looked at oscar, trying to get a reaction out of him and he simply smiled, nodded and whispered a ‘congratulations’ to both of you, before turning around to eat again.

you sort of expected a better reaction from your brother, maybe an excited one, maybe a protective one.

the aussie looked like he didn’t care enough to give it a minute of attention.

maybe it was just because today was supposed to be about him, and you ruined it. maybe he wasn’t so pleased to have lando as a brother-in-law. maybe he was just tired because of the race.

you didn’t give it too much thinking, you moved to his right, sat next to him with lando by your side, and ate. making conversation with everyone around and looking over to lando from time to time, to make sure he was doing okay.

that night, you got home with lando and received an extremely good feedback from your family. they loved norris, and were delighted to have him as a part of the family.

oscar, who didn’t seem to be so pleased, never texted you. you noticed it and found it strange, but once again thought there could be other explanations to it. not just that he abhorred the idea of you two together.

some weeks passed away and you were now on lando’s driver room. sitting on the edge of the couch, caressing his hair.

norris knew you loved formula one more than almost everything, so he made sure to have you there in japan with him, since oscar had already gifted his own passes.

your boyfriend looked over at you with a concerned look.

“hey, baby, have you talked to oscar after we told him we were together?” he asked, playing with the zipper of his race suit.

“i don’t think so.” you stopped to think, and realized you hadn’t indeed talked to him. which was odd, as you were always glued to each other. “i think he’s been pretty busy.”

lando hummed and you looked down at his face. “why?” you asked, he shook his head while looking at you.

“nothing, love. it just looks like he’s avoiding me.” with half-closed eyes, you hummed.

after all, your theory might not be wrong. maybe oscar didn’t like the idea of you and lando as more than friends.

“i’ll try to talk to him, lan.” you bent down to kiss his forehead. “you have free practice in a few minutes, don’t worry about this. it will be okay.”

he sat up and hugged you.

“i love you.” he smiled against your neck.

“i love you too. good luck, baby.” you smiled back, feeling his lips on the sensitive skin. he eventually got up and left the room. you stayed back a little to get his laptop and notebook, for after the fp sessions.

lando had two shitty sessions, finishing 10th in one and 12th in the other. on the other hand, oscar managed to pull some really good laps, finishing 8th and 1st.

your boyfriend got out of the car and looked over at you to let you know he was okay, as that was always a preoccupation, and talked with his mechanics, giving them feedback about the car and what could be improved.

oscar did the same thing, not taking so long because there wasn’t really much that the mechanics could do on his car.

piastri’s feedback after the first free practice helped him realize that the problem was how long he took to brake on the corners. improving that, he made an incredible fp2.

“osc, good job.” you smiled at your brother as he passed by. the aussie simply nodded his head before going into his driver room.

you thought of following him immediately and get things cleared out, but maybe you should just wait for lando. this was about him too, after all.

your family wasn’t here yet, because, except for your father, none of them actually liked formula one. they liked that your brother was brilliant doing it, but they didn’t really know anything or cared about the sport. so they only came for the race. never even qualifying.

your dad watched them from home, not wanting to leave your mother alone with all the hosting responsibilities.

once norris was freed, he walked up to you and held you in his arms.

“you were distracted out there.” you stated. the british let out a frustrated sigh.

“i know… it’s just the oscar situation. he’s one of my closest friends in formula one. i don’t want him to hate me.” you chuclked, pulling the man closer to you.

“he doesn’t hate you.” you commented. “let’s talk to him.” lando’s eyes widened and he pulled back to try and see if you were serious.

“now?” he asked and you nodded, grabbing his hand and pulling him though the garage until you reached oscar’s private room.

hearing a knock on his door, oscar ran to the door.

“hi?” he was confused with your presence. it wasn’t you he was waiting for.

“hey. i think we need to talk.” without asking for permission, you entered and dragged lando inside with you.

“we do, actually.” oscar states, closing the door and leaning against his table. lando took place on top of a balcony and you leaned against that same balcony, standing face to face with your big brother.

no one said anything for some seconds. trying to figure out what was the best way to start this important conversation.

“you guys should’ve told me.” oscar said, looking between the both of you. anyone who knew him could tell how hurt he was. his eyes reflecting it.

“we told you!” you remarked.

“yeah, after what? two months?” he sarcastically pointed out. “next time send me a letter, maybe it would be faster.” you rolled your eyes and lando stood still, understanding oscar’s side perfectly.

“this isn’t about you.” you said, lando touched your back gently, trying to calm you down.

“you are my sister, y/n! do you even know how much i care about this? you are my other half, the person i love the most in this whole entire world!” oscar’s voice rose a little as he spoke. “and lando, you are my friend! you both kept this from me and discarded me in the process. i was informed at the same time that auntie joannah was!”

you felt the urge to laugh at the mention of the old lady’s name, but kept your expression still. a little more saddened now that you were realizing just how big your mistake was.

“oscar…”

“no, y/n. let me finish.” he asked. you simply nodded, and he continued. his arms were crossed in front of his chest now and he had his race suit halfway down. “you have been distancing yourself and i have no idea of why. at first i thought you weren’t okay because of hate or how things were going with tennis, but you don’t seem very preoccupied with that, so i really don’t know.”

he takes a deep breath before speaking again. “i’m sure you had your reasons, but you’re my best friend, y/n, and constantly feeling like you don’t trust me anymore, or don’t consider me as you did before… it hurts.”

sadness embraces you as you listen to your brother. lando caresses your shoulder from behind you.

“maybe i should leave you two to talk, this is family matter.” the british suggests.

“you’re family.” both you and oscar say in unison. lando couldn’t help but feel his heart warm, smiling softly to himself as you think of some way to explain things to oscar.

“you know, i would have been your relationship’s biggest supporter if you had given me the chance.” oscar was the one to talk again, and you couldn’t hold back anymore. you needed to hug him, and so you did.

it was a clumsy hug, but it meant everything to you.

“i never meant to hurt you, osc.” you truthfully told him, feeling his grip tightening around you. “it was supposed to be a surprise…”

“what a fucking great way to do it.”

as you both hugged each other, lando watched from the balcony. he too was scared of losing oscar’s friendship, but he was sure that you would do the right thing, and sort things out.

“i never thought you would see this as a good thing. from the start, you and lando got along really really well, and i never wanted to get in the way of that, but i did not control it.” tears threatened to come out of your eyes at any time.

“when it happened, when we happened, i was terrified… but this was strong, i couldn’t stay away from him even if i tried. it was the kind of love you can not put down… and the idea seemed to be less and less terrifying.” you tried to explain. oscar payed close attention to every word you said, and lando, from the balcony, did the same thing.

it was the first time you opened up to someone other than your own figure in the mirror.

“and then i embraced this. this idea of being his, and then he asked me to be his girlfriend and i could never say no. i love him!”

you turn around to look at lando, who hugged his knees and smiled at you. oscar looked too and immediately realized that norris was the one for you. just by his eyes.

“but i still wasn’t prepared to tell you, because of every single devilish thought in my head. so i kept my distance because i know i wouldn’t be able to lie or hide anything from you. but i never, ever, stopped trusting you or considered you less.” you remarked. “you’re my osc, my big brother, you are my everything, and i’m sorry for not communicating.”

you could see in his eyes how hurt he was, and you hated to think it was all because of you.

“i’m sorry, oscar. i really am.”

“i like to know stuff. and i love you,” he pulls you into a real hug this time, allowing you to breathe freely again.

lando, who was still sat on the balcony, walked over towards you and stood next to you, watching the sibling moment with admiration in his eyes.

it was rare to find such a connection.

when you two pulled apart, lando finally broke his silence.

“hey, osco… i’m sorry too man. we both thought about surprising you, and i may have been a little more guilty than y/n there, because i didn’t want you to hate me for dating your sister.”

oscar smiled at the brit.

“i trust you with her, and i don’t hate you. but if you ever even think about hurting her...” lando nodded knowingly, and they touched hands.

“i would never. i really love her.” oscar pulled your boyfriend into a hug and you stood back, watching the two of them.

“i can see it.” oscar smiled as they pulled back.

lando ran his hand from behind your neck until he reached your shoulder, and pulled you close. he kissed the top of your head.

“i’m family now eh?” lando bragged and oscar rolled his eyes.

“don’t make me regret it.”

[i-cant-sing]

i was just minding my business like scrolling to find new fics to read since i was so so bored and while i was finding some delicious fics (ahem ahem: yandere big brother bakugou x little sister reader) ur post suddenly idk the word (lumitaw (its a filo word)) and i was screaming and immediately dropped what i was supposed to read to read yours 😭😭😭

i got the worst memory ever to exist because i keep forgetting their names but i think i'll grasp them once the next chapter is out (hopefully) but yeaaah!!! baris reminds me of abbas in a way but ig he's a bit more.. brute yk what im talking about????? ig he's ok..

OH! and i have a theory about the painting, y/n's face getting smudged maybe because baldwin or SALAUDDIN decided to smudged it to forget how they look due to heartbroken (prob not baldwin,, but i feel like salauddin would do that ??) i guess im getting married again 😔😔 i feel like im betraying my pookie salauddin 💔💔💔🙏🙏 BUT ANYWAYS THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE SNOW!!!! AMAZING AS ALWAYS!! can't wait for the next one already!! 😭😭😭 i think i'll send more of my thoughts if something crosses over my mind (prob when im in the shower)

ooohh i like your theory(portrait pictures at the end). i like it a lot. expanding on it:

Baldwin would probably cause the painting to be smudged because he's kissing it, kissing your lips, drunk off his mind, tears streaming down his cheek as he spends hours sitting in front of it, talking to the painting as if u still exist, begging u to come back from heaven, even apologising for all he's done, just please- come back, angel...

Meanwhile Salauddin would probably be staring at your portrait angrily. He understands why you had to leave but.... you couldnt have told him where you were goinh? Do you not think he couldve protected you? He wouldve used his whole army, gathered Muslims from all around the world to protect you. Did you... did you not have the least bit faith in him? deep down, he knows u did this to prevent a war between him and baldwin but.... Salauddin wouldve gone to war for you. Happily. This wasnt your decision to make alone. Now, he stands in front of your portrait, he has it in his palace now, and he doesnt say voice it out like baldwin, but he has complaints. HE keeps them inside, mentally talking to you, telling you just how stupid you were for sacrificing yourself, for jumping off that stupid cliff. How u shouldve just- just asked him for help ONCE, and he wouldve fought until his last breath if it meant keeping u safe. In his mind, u sacrificed yourself to protect Baldwin from murdering innocent muslims or anyone else u wouldve seeked help from.

And now? All Salauddin can do is pray for you. He wakes up late into the night and sits on the prayer mat, making dua for you for hours, reading Quran for you, has animals slaughtered on eid on your behalf, even doing charity and hajj (pilgrimage) on your behalf, just so that you can have more good deeds in your name. He still has the chess board u gifted him, but he's stopped playing chess. He never played the game again, it was only a painful reminder of you. The one person who he could never beat.

As for your painting, why it was smudged? Salauddin didnt want anyone to see your beauty, thats why he kept the portrait hidden in his room, but then he feared that one day when he's not around anymore, someone will see you. So, he used a rag soaked in turpentine to smudge your face, but couldnt do more than just the bottom half of your face. He thought that was fine, after all, thats how u did often appear when you were around, wearing a niqaab, a veil that covered your face.

Now that he looks at your eyes, he realises his mistake. He heard the wise tell him-

"Eyes are the windows to the soul."

He now knows it to be true.

This is what I think the portraits look like:

Notice that this is the earrings Salauddin gifted Y/n when she was in the market with him:

How Baldwin's been:

[binniesbooks]

hi fayebae, heres the next one for hyuka! (Cos i just saw a clip of hyuka with his new black hair n in a black shirt, and its like cos now hyuka is buff buff, i was thinking mayb smth abt his chest? hyuka x reader!

basically reader is bffs with tubatu, but well hyuka has a crush on reader! reader has mentioned before that her type is men who exercises and have big titties(if u read my tyun pillow fic you would know what i mean🤭)

whenever reader is around tubatu, she will never fail to mention abt how tyuns chest is getting bigger and will joke abt how he should drop his workout routine. But hyuka didnt take it as a joke, so he actually asked tyun for help on building his titties. So after few mths of training, reader finally notices that hyuka’s titties are growing and that sends her on a conflicting journey, because shes never seen hyuka in that way before. But thanks to his titties now reader is looking in hyuka’s way…

trying to play it off cool and not freak out, reader jokes and asked whether hyuka’s builded chest was meant for her, and well hyuka told her the truth and agreed. which she was stunned(this is clearly inspired cos of that gym pic of hyuka n his chest ofc)

things escalated and well now reader is riding hyuka, hands on his big titties as support (smut: tittie play(reader sucks on hyukas nipples, hyuka does the same for reader, tittie fuck, hyuka asking reader to sit on his face , idk what else but please include as much as u want, these are just my ideas of ehat could happen hehe)

hopefully this is good🥺 love u my love💗(once again do this after ur yj fic if u want unless ure hit with inspiration again😭) i’ll come back soon, kith kith💋

• GAINS AND GLORY

HK 002 .F22 2024

wc 3.3k

pairings buff!hyuka x reader

warnings tits play (both ends receiving), multiple marking (scratching and hickeys), unprotected sex, creampie, manhandling (+ anything I've missed)

faye's note the asks be rotting on my inbox, I'm sorry omg 😭 but here it is, coz they're hunting me at my FYP AHAHAHA! Although I see Kai as a softie (the reason why I still incorporated fluff elements in this fic), I think I still love this one, omg! For tho who are waiting for Hyuka's fic, I present to you, Gains and Glory! Please enjoy! 🙂‍↕️

"How is that even possible? Are you cheating? You're most probably cheating!" You frowned after being beaten for the nth time by Taehyun in the game you're playing. Taehyun proceeded to flex both of his arms and laughed at you.

"I don't wanna play with you anymore!" you complained, "Kai! Come here, come play the game with me instead! I don't wanna play with Taehyun anymore!" You called for Kai and the youngest scrambled towards the couch you were sitting on.

"Give the controller to Hyuka, I hate you." You pouted at Taehyun. Taehyun handed the controller to Hyuka and he attacked you with tickles.

"Soobin! Can you grab this man? Wait -- wait!" He was tickling you so much and you were thrashing around causing him to flex his muscles.

You have been friends with the five of them. Despite their very busy schedule, they always find time to at least spend a day with you. Or even a week if their schedules were a bit loose. Every weekend, you would find yourself in their dorm. Laughing, eating, playing, sleeping. Name anything that friends do, and you're sure you would have done it with them.

They never complained about having you around, if anything, they were thankful because, at least once a week, they could refresh their mind and unwind. And your favorite time? It was when you and Soobin baked cookies together. When you and Yeonjun stroll the streets to take some Instagrammable pictures. When you and Beomgyu spent time quietly - which was ironic because you two are the loudest when together - with arts; either painting or drawing. When you and Taehyun would watch exercise videos together, obviously with him exercising while you laze around, sprawled on the couch. And when you and Kai were together, you guys would end up shopping for plushies even though he had millions of them already.

Other people tend to look at you with judging eyes. They even talked about how you were giving the 'pick-me-girl vibe' which you and the guys often laughed about. You were their friend even before they debuted and your mind never wandered beyond being anything more than friends with them -- or so you thought, yeah.

"Back from the gym again?" You felt a presence behind you while you were cooking dinner. You didn't have to turn around to know who it was. The scent was enough for you to decipher who it was. The fresh soapy scent - because after his gym sessions, he would take a bath before coming home, and the mild smell of the mist he was using, you knew it was totally Taehyun.

"You know us so well that you can now tell who it is just by our scent huh." His head pops on your shoulder as he brushes his cheeks on yours, emitting a soft chuckle from you. "Tae, you're not beating the cat allegations again." "Hmm, don't care." He shrugs as he gives you a back hug. "Welcome back home, by the way," you answered.

Hugging them was the most intimate interaction you had with the guys. But the hugs were never sensual at all. They always just felt safe and at home whenever they melt in your embrace. They could feel all their stress and tension disappear just with a simple hug from you

Kai was humming while hugging his plushies when he stepped in the kitchen and saw you and Taehyun hugging. "Guys! Taehyun is hogging y/n to himself! It's not even hug time yeeeetttt!" Kai yelled causing every door in the house to burst open with resounding complains. "Hey, that's not fair!" Beomgyu pouts as he crosses his arms. "It's not hug time yet! This is so unfair!" Yeonjun tried to pry Taehyun's arms off you. "Y/n, stop hugging Taehyun before I throw your things out of our dorm." Soobin was pouting at you as he stomped his feet.

"Okay okay! I'll do it later then!" You laughed as you stopped hugging Taehyun and Yeonjun pulled him away from you. Taehyun even complained that he was just too tired from his gym session and needed a hug, only to be met with a plush that Kai threw.

"Dinner's not ready yet?" Kai sat on the chair not far from you cooking. "Almost done, Kai, go prepare the plates," you smiled.

Soobin and Beomgyu were the ones who were scheduled to wash the dishes. You thought that they shouldn't be scheduled at the same time because the soaps and bubbles would be spilling everywhere due to their bickering and playfulness. Kai, Taehyun, and Yeonjun were sitting on the couch with you, busy watching the TV, with Taehyun and Yeonjun being topless.

You were too used to the guys being half-naked around you. It was like a norm for you to be around so there was no use in making a fuss about it. They often remove their tops just because. Yup, no reason at all, they just do it.

You turned your head towards Taehyun, "You're working on your chest, aren't you?" you asked, noticing how big Taehyun's chest was and how they often looked bigger whenever he wore a tight-fitted shirt, which he nodded. "Are you finally coming to your senses and making a move on me just because I told you how I love men with big tiddies?"You teased and laughed heartily as he looked at you with the same disgusted expression he maintained throughout his life.

"Y/n, you know I love you and know how much I value our friendship, but if you want to keep being welcome here, please avoid saying things like that." And Yeonjun burst out laughing at Taehyun's answer. "You! My goodness!" you just rolled your eyes while still laughing.

"Why not drop your exercise routine? So Yeonjun can start working on his flat--" You were cut off with a pillow being thrown at you. "Yah! My chest is buffed too! They're not flat!" Yeonjun yelled at you.

Unknown to your eyes, Kai's ear perked up, and hugged himself as he felt his own body subtly. He looked over to Taehyun's chest and back to his own chest. He stayed silent, as he watched you guys.

"Hug time!" Kai yelled when the clock struck 10, and all of them gathered around you, lining up as they patiently waited for their turn. "Are you going to stay the night?" Yeonjun asked while taking his time hugging you. "Will do, I want to cook breakfast for you guys before your busy schedule starts again," you answered, he pulled away and mouthed goodnight and Soobin almost shoved him out of the way.

"I want some pancakes for breakfast," Soobin silently whispered as he hugged you tightly, almost covering you with his big frame. "Of course whatever you want, Binnie."

"Goodnight y/n, please rest well too." Beomgyu shortly commented as he hugged you and you hummed back.

"I love you but I think I should start hating you." Taehyun's disgusted look never faltered and you just pinched his cheeks while laughing.

All the other four were already heading to their rooms but Kai was still standing in front of you. You opened your arms for him as he slowly walked towards you, tightly clutching his plush in hand.

"What's wrong?" you asked as you sat up straight. Kai plopped down beside you and melted in your arms as he hid his flushed face which was unknown to you, into the crook of your neck. "Goodnight y/n," he simply whispered. "Sleep tight, Kai, I arranged your plushies earlier," you said as he stood up and walked towards his bedroom.

The next day, you wake up early to cook breakfast for them before they start their busy week again.

"We'll be busy with our upcoming comeback again," Soobin sighed as he poked the pancakes on his plate.

"Cheer up guys, you know I'll be here when your schedule is done." You tried to cheer them up and forced them to finish their breakfast before leaving.

4 months. For four months they were so busy that they weren't able to spend a day with you.

When you went back to their dorm, two guys were missing in action. "Where are the others?" you asked as you removed your shoes. All three heads snapped to where the voice had come from, only to find out that it was you.

"Y/n!" They all screamed almost in unison, as they rushed over to you, dropping everything they were currently doing.

You took a nap that afternoon while waiting for the other two to come back when you woke up to the unfamiliar yet familiar scent. Your eyes roamed around, and Kai and Taehyun caught your eyes. It seemed like they had just taken a bath a little while ago, given that their hair was still damp.

Kai noticed that you had just woken up so he cramped his big body lying down beside you on the couch. You chuckled and tried to push him away but he didn't budge.

When he sat up, you noticed how his shirt was sticking against his chest. "Wait a minute, I was only gone for a couple of months... What is this?" you questioned as you poked Kai's chest. Kai felt embarrassed to answer and scooted over to Taehyun. Taehyun answered for him instead, "He's been going to the gym with me. I don't know what has gotten into him though?"

You were in awe. Taehyun's chest was big but it looked like Kai's chest now was bigger. Especially considering that he had a bigger frame than Taehyun. In the past, Kai was so adamant about not going to the gym, he preferred cuddling with his plushies, telling the other guys that having a baby belly was cute, just like his soft plushies. But as you look at him more, it looks like he isn't the baby you used to know anymore, he has become buff. And only within just a few months at that.

That night, you were awfully silent. Your eyes kept on wandering back to Kai's chest, subtly, not wanting to be caught. Your mind couldn't help but wonder the reason behind Kai's new buffed-up body.

That same night, all of them went to bed earlier than usual. They just wanted to sleep longer. They claimed that their bed had missed them because, for four months, they weren't able to be in their dorm, nor sleep in their own rooms.

You, on the other hand, couldn't fall asleep. Suddenly the guest room felt so big and empty. You didn't know why but you kept on tossing and turning. At that moment, you heard footsteps that stopped right in front of your door. You immediately sat up, waiting for a knock on the door. Which it did. Someone had knocked thrice before pushing your door open. Only then did you realize that you probably forgot to lock it because you were spacing out too much.

The dim light from the hallway shone through the slightly opened door. "Hey, why are you still awake? Can't sleep?" You asked. He closed and locked the door behind him, the room now too dark for anything to be seen. He walked towards the window slightly opening the window, allowing a bluish-yellow light coming from the moon to penetrate throughout your room.

The bed dipped down at his weight, and he crawled up to you, burying his face in your neck, his body now, almost on top of you. "I...I missed you." He whispered, as he tightly hugged you.

"Kai..." You felt how his heart thumped harder the longer he hugged you. This was new. No one ever did this to you, not even when Yeonjun was sick when Soobin got his first breakup, when Beomgyu failed to win the art contest, and even when Taehyun wasn't allowed by their manager to flash his abs at their show. Kai's hug and whisper felt different. As if he was longing for something else.

"I missed you too, you surprised me." You answered when he pulled away. Only then did you finally see him, he wasn't wearing his shirt. You've never seen him topless before. But now he was, and he was right in front of you.

Maybe it was the heat of the moment, but your finger landed on his chest, gently tracing his buffed chest. "Did you, by chance, do this for me? Because you heard I want men with big tiddies?" you joked. But you were stunned when he nodded. "I actually d-did in fact do this for you, I wanted to surprise you since it's b-been four months since I last saw y-you," his voice was shaky as he spoke.

"I-i've been wanting to tell you this y/n, but I just couldn't bring myself to s-say it. Not until now." Kai's face was so close to yours that you could inhale his minty breaths.

You wanted to push him, but putting both of your hands on his chest felt like it might be crossing a line. You felt how hot his body was. The warmth of his body, radiating through his skin, felt electrifying to you.

"I know it's weird... But I couldn't help but have a little crush on you," he carefully whispered as if someone else was in the room to hear it. "One chance y/n, please give me one chance." His forehead now resting against yours, his eyes were filled with longing. The room was so thick with silence that you could hear him gulp.

"Y-you're lucky I'm into big g-guys like you," you squeaked, and your heart swelled at how a bright smile had crept onto his lips.

He placed his hand over yours, which was resting on his chest, and guided you to squeeze it. His soft strangled whimper sent a shiver down your spine.

The wind blew making the curtains on the window flutter and the hair on the back of Kai's neck to stand up. He finally propped himself with his two hands supporting his body as he leaned in closer to you. You ran your fingers to his perked-up nipples and your eyes watched closely at how he bit his lips and how his eyes fluttered.

"You're brave. Coming to this room without a shirt on, and confessing your love." You commented as you roll his nipples between your fingers. He gripped onto your sheets as you chuckled at how he was holding his moans back.

"We're downstairs, you can let out your moans. They won't be able to hear it." Your taunt got him opening his mouth as he let out all those muffled moans he had been holding back. His body trembled at your touch.

You slowly push him down as he keeps on backing up. You finally pushed him to lie down when his head could no longer lie on the bed. His head was now hanging off the edge, and it was making him dizzy with how his blood was rushing to his head while you were licking his nipple.

"Fuck!" He whimpered when you subtly bit his nipple. "Y/n..." He holds the back of your head as you continued sucking. His toes curled at your tongue, rolling and swirling around his nipple.

"To be honest, I've been thinking what could've been your reason for this, but turns out it was all because of me," you chuckled as you kissed the tip of his nose.

Your touch felt like fire over his body. His stomach swirling, his mind blurry. He never thought you'd give in to him.

You dipped your head down again as you littered his chest with splotchy red marks. Leaving some near his nipples, on his shoulder, and on his neck. Kai was a moaning mess under you as he kept on trying to hold his head up, but was always failing. His moans and the rustling of the sheets filled the room.

Since he was being discreet with his moans, you decided to catch him off guard and grind on him. His moans became high pitched and more slutty. You chuckled, the cute guy you often care about was now a totally different guy underneath you.

You felt a wet patch on his sweats, "Did you just come?", you asked as you pulled away. "D-don't look!" Kai tried to stop you but it was too late. You ran your fingers on the wet bulge of his pants. "Kai, you're naughty," you commented, and he only answered with a whimper.

He sat down and pushed you down, to hover above you. "Not fair," he pouted and lifted your shirt over your chest.

"Kai, I swear if you do what I di-" you weren't able to finish your sentence. His mouth was now on your boobs, sucking on your nipples, rolling his tongue again and again. "K-kai.. Kai..." Your breathing was unstable as you squirmed, and you kept on chanting his name along with whines and whimpers.

Just like how you did for him, he also littered your chest, neck, and shoulder with love bites, he was now smiling at how they looked under the moonlight from the window.

"Pretty," he smiled and crashed his lips over yours. The kiss was hot. It wasn't sloppy but it felt eager.

Kai pulled back, sat down and pulled you onto his lap. Your left hand was on your back as he held it with his left hand. You couldn't move, you could only clutch on his hair with your free hand, and nothing else. His right hand was rubbing your clothed ass, lifting the skirt to play with your skin.

"I'm sure hug time w-was n-never like this, fuck," you pulled him closer as your nails dug into his bare back. Kai winced at the scratching pain on his back as you drag your nails down. He kept on feasting over your neck and played with your ass, continuously brushing his fingers on your skin.

When you started grinding again, you squealed when you felt a stinging pleasure on your ass, his hand probably left a mark on your skin. His big hard chest was pressing against yours. They felt hard and soft at the same time. You wanted to play with his nipples but with your position, you couldn't do anything.

He pulled his sweats down to his thighs and slipped inside you with ease. You're too wet for him.

"Wow, you're taking me whole, y/n." Kai was big, you felt him stretch you out, but you were too wet that he could just slip into you with so much ease.

"F-fuck I feel s-so full," you can feel him arranging your guts with his huge cock. You can't help but move your hips wanting to immediately feel the pleasurable feeling of his cock inside you.

"P-pull out okay? I'm n-not on any birth control, you j-just slid i-in w-without a condom," you added. "Sorry, I got t-too excited. Your pussy feels so warm and soft. Makes me wanna cum inside you."

"K-kai!" You warned him, he only chuckled at you.

He started to thrust slowly, while you were still trapped in the position he put you into.

His slow thrust becomes more sloppy as you keep on moaning into his ears. Your moans kept stirring something in him, it made him wanna cum inside you even more.

"K-kai please, I'm c-close." You whined as you scratched his back.

"W-wanna cum inside you, y/n. Wanna cum s-so bad." His thrusts get stronger which made your boobs bounce which caused them to brush against his nipples, making him more aroused.

Maybe you were just too drunk on his cock that you unconsciously nodded at him and chanted 'yes' multiple times.

"I'm g-gonna cum!" you squeaked as you tangled your fingers in his hair. You felt a warm liquid being spilled inside you the moment you came as Kai pants with you. His forehead now resting on your shoulders with his mouth open. You wanted to complain that he came inside even when you told him not to, but it just felt so good that you chose to collapse onto his arms instead.

@binniesbooks 2024

[landitolover]

𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍𝒔 𝒐𝒏 𝒇𝒊𝒍𝒎 in which pierre is dating everyone’s favorite singer! ౨ৎ pierre x female!singer!reader

Liked by ynswife, pierregasly, xoxoyn, and 43,789 others

ynupdates Y/n, her first night and her first time playing in paris!! She preformed amazing and gave us a sneak peak of her new song, “dance with me” 🥹 who could this song be about ? 🧐🧐

view all 678 comments..

user why did paris do to deserve this..😐😐 Like wdym they got a sneak peak of her new song????? 😭😭

→ user RIGHT like stop it oui oui bitches.

user she made dance with me for me wdym

user i’d kill to see her live 😭

user what’s happening to me?? 🧍‍♀️-🧎‍♀️-🎸

user PARIS GO SUCK A DICK

user i lost a song i didnt even know i could Lose.

→ user LITERALLY.

user PIERRE SIR WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

user her outfit is so cute 😭❤️

→ user rightt, shes always eating

Liked by yourbestie, charles_leclerc, and 998,788 others

yourusername thank u france 🥖🥖🇫🇷🇫🇷 love u ❤️❤️🙈🙈

view all 3,479 comments..

yourbestie who is this french man mrs ……. ?!?!?!!!!

→ yourusername Idk i was just kissing a random baguette man i found on the street :///

→ yourbestie ur gonna get a disease from kissing a random french man………

→ yourusername ouch. -french man

user we lost her to a french man ☹️

→ yourusername dw he will never compete with u guys

user IS THIS THE MAN SHES WRITING A SONG FOR?????

→ yourusername thank u to my maaan 🫡

user i can tell pierres hair, and thats his hair in the 3rd pic.

→ user yeah cause that bitch is balding

→ user LMFAO THATS FOUL 😭😭

user the last picture is literally PIERRE.. ARE THEY TRYING TO BE OBVIOUS

→ user right they’re not even hiding it

Liked by yourbestie, yukitsunoda0511, and 345,971 others

pierregasly Over the break 💕

View all 484 comments

yukitsunoda0511 I really like your photographer 😂

→ pierregasly Thanks yuki, I love her too 😂

charles_leclerc Seems like you’ve been having some fun over the break 🫣

→ pierregasly 🤔🤔

user AAAHSOXOSAOS YN YN YN

→ user who is yn and why do people think she’s with pierre??

→ user she’s an artist! you should search her up/ listen to her!!

user pierres soft launch era!! get rid of it. I NEED TO KNOW WHO SHE IS

user i love how yuki is still in these photo dumps ❤️

Liked by pierregasly, yourbestie, and 134,889 others

yourusername hellloooo everybody!!!!!!!! new single out in a few days (yay) it’s called “dance with you” 💌

View all 589 comments

user WE’RE FINALLY GETTING FEED

user EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU TO HER MAN, HE GAVE OUR GIRL INSPO

→ user thank you kind sir we don’t know of

→ user thank you for making our mother write love songs x

→ user THANK 😭 U 😭 YN’S 😭 MAN 😭😭😭😭😭😭

user my prayers have been answered 😭🙏🏼

user CANT WAIT OH MU GOD

user I’m so ready to stream this song everyday and cry.

→ yourusername don’t cry babes 😞❤️ ILY

user LETS GO LESTS GOO WE WON

user cancelling all my plans just in case she calls !!

→ yourusername BACK WHEN I WAS LIVIN FOR THE HOPE OF IT ALL

user GIRL I CANT WAIT U NEED TO RELEASE IT RIGHT THIS SECOND

user this is so AUAAGDUWOQDFC

pierregasly added to their story

seen by ynupdates charles_leclerc 252,676 others

YN 💕

PIERRE OH MY GOD

WHY WOULD U …

BAEB 🙊🤍

I MEANT TO PUT IT ON MY CLOSE FRIENDS I SWEAR

i mean ITS NOT LIKE PEOPLE DIDNT ALREADY KNOW..??

YN 💕

well YEAH.. but I wanted to tell my fans myself 😒

BAEB 🙊🤍

i’m sorry 😞

at least your single comes out in a few days .. ??

YN 💕

😒😒

ok wait

i forgive u 🤍🤍🥖🥖

BAEB 🙊🤍

❤️❤️❤️

Liked by yukitsunoda0511, pierregasly, and 88,992 others

yourusername a very wise man once told me it wouldn’t b a photo dump if yuki weren’t in it … so i kidnapped him so he could be in my photo dump, thanks yuki ❤️🙊🐈‍⬛🥖

tagged yukitsunoda0511 pierregasly

View all 989 comments

user YUKI WHAT ARE U DOIN HERE

→ user more like what is PIERRE doing here …

user i hope yk how to fight pierre fucking gasly

user plot twist what if shes dating yuki

→ user its time to take ur meds babe! all these soft launch pictures we’ve gotten have BROWN HAIR !! does yuki have brown hair ? no!!

→ user jesus girl i was joking .. maybe YOU should take ur meds, insane ass…

user the last photo 😭😭

→ user shes so real fo that though cause what is up with these sassy men

→ yourusername sassy men apocalypse 🧟

user this is by far my favorite post ever cause YUKI LOOKS SO ADORABLE 😞❤️

user i am so SICK. HUST POST YOU AND PIERRE KISSING OR SOMETHING 😭😭😭 PLEASE I CANNOT KEEP WAITING FOR YOU GUYS TO CONFIRM IT YOURSELF. PLEASE YOU GUYS ARE SO SICK AND FUCKIGN TWISTED 😭😭😭😭

→ user preach 🗣️🗣️🗣️💯💯💯

user poor yuki he had to third wheel

→ user wdym yn was third wheeling

yukitsunoda0511 I have a family please let me go

→ yourusername never 😹🙊

pierregasly my little photographer

→ yourusername i should start charging u..

→ pierregasly no … you can’t, I’m broke

→ yourusername you make more money than I do ????

Liked by pierregasly, yourbestie, and 99,192 others

yourusername heeyyoo! “dance with me” out noow…!!! and by the way, I DO really like you pierregasly 🤍🤍🥖🥖⭐️⭐️

View 1,230 comments

user SHUT UP OH MY GOD

user no…. NO….. I LOST MY WIFE……

user yn does this mean we’ll get more love songs 🎀

→ yourusername oui ☺️☺️🫰🏼🫰🏼⭐️⭐️

user i just fell to my knees in a walmart parking lot

user what if i just 🪦

user you’re so silly bae 😂😂 you and ur a.i boyfriend 😂😂

→ yourusername sorry x

→ user excuse me where can i get a french a.i boyfriend like u

→ yourusername uhm ask yukitsunoda0511 he got it for me!!!!

user DANCE WITH ME STAYS ON REPEAT

user im throwing up

charles_leclerc Does this mean I can’t take him on dates anymore ?

→ yourusername can i take your girlfriend out? cause then the answer is yes charlie 🦎🦎

→ charles_leclerc 🧐🧐 Maybe….

pierregasly dance with me is the best song in existence ❤️❤️

→ yourusername thank u babe 🤍🤍😊😊🫰🏼🫰🏼

pierregasly I’m glad that I can finally post you

→ yourusername I love you 🥹🤍🤍

user AUATAAHH FINALLY

→ user I WON I WON I WON

→ user MY PARENTS

→ user SCREAMING AND SOBBING SO HARD RIGHT NOW

user they’re so ☺️☺️

user I ALWAYS KNEW U WERE MEANT FOR THAT WAG LIFE QUEEN

→ user wait PLS tell me you’ll be at the races 😭🙏🏼

→ yourusername of course! definitely not all of them but i’ll try my hardest to come 💕😊

Liked by yourusername, yukitsunoda0511, and 87,778 others

pierregasly Je t'aime my red panda 🤍

tagged yourusername

View all 767 comments

user HE CAN’T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS 😭😭

user seeing this makes me feel . DISGUSTED

user if you look closely you can see me violently sobbing in the corner.

user you guys are so cute!!!!!!!!! 😂 (i literally just kms)

user always these damn white men

user my parents 4eva

user yourusername when does the love album for pierre come out babes x

→ yourusername feb 7th 🦎

user the 😭 caption 😭. my 😭 red 😭 panda 😭

user pierre how do u feel after pulling the baddest girl ever

pierregasly amazing cause i ❤️ my gf

user yn bae how long has this been going on !!

→ yourusername 50 years

landonorris LET ME GO TO YOUR CONCERTS YN

→ yourusername of course landobum x

charles_leclerc so cute (yuck)

yukitsnoda0511 you’re welcome for setting you up with her 🙄

→ yourusername THANK YOU SO SO SO MUCH FOR THE MOST WONDERFUL BF EVER YUKI ⭐️⭐️🫰🏼🫰🏼

→ pierregasly THANK YOU YUKI!! I’LL BUY YOU ALL THE FOOD YOU WANT🫡❤️

౨ৎ helloooo ! i hope u like this 😁😁 idk what to say tbh cause this is just a re upload …. I WILL TRY TO POST FOR DULCE HOTLINE SOON 🤓 i’ve been kinda busy tho, sorry ☹️😞

[uchinagai]

07.1 - "its me before her" - Karina smau

warnings: cursing, unhealthy obsession if you really think about it, fighting, mention of blood, use of alcohol, 2k+ words (I got carried away) idk what else just enjoy :3

She hated it.

Oh, how much she hated being an idol. Maybe it was the age catching up to her because her generation ended. None knows, but everyone knows she hated all the attention she got as Jennie Ruby Jane of Blackpink.

Maybe that's also why she felt drawn to y/n: She wasn't the Jennie everyone worshipped with her, but Jennie, who could express herself and talk about her opinions without millions of people coming at her; she felt safe with her.

Could that be the reason why she fell for her? Possibly. She never meant to fall for her, she didn't even know she liked girls before y/n came into her life with that silly show she went to, only because she watched it occasionally and laughed at idols' reactions discovering who they were texting. It was refreshing for her to see that the opposite, extrovert was teasing and flirting with her from the other side of the screen. She knew about y/n, and she learned a lot. She was all over Korea's billboards, like once she was. She was the new generation IT girl, like just like rookie jennie. She was pretty, she would admit. Her music was also good, so Jennie couldn't help but search for her, learning a few things here and there. Like how she loved “nevertheless” so much that she went on and got the tattoo on her neck, how she enjoyed listening to soothing and calm music, and how it helped her sleep well. which side she preferred to sleep on, her house and where she lived and so on. It could be too much. Jennie never questioned

She was drawn to her.

Even ‘blinks’ knew. How? She reposted her music and posts, mentioned her on shows and vlogs, and said she would do anything to get her attention.

But now, here she was, giggling and smiling from ear to ear, seeing y/n on the other side of the wall, while y/n had a shocked face, seeing her idol of years standing and smiling at her. Was it awkward? Maybe? Jennie wouldn't admit it and say it was because all she did during the small interview at the end was geek over y/n, giving the most prominent puppy eyes, ignoring the awkward tension from y/n; she stared so much that fans captured it in seconds, making ship edits.

Secretly, she wanted edits and videos of them together to look back on and maybe even use to slide into her DMs.

She did.

She wouldn't let the girl go now she got her attention and also learned that y/n was her huge fan but was too shy to approach as big of an idol as she was

============================================================================================================================================

“I'm telling you! Old BTS was the SHITTT”

“Hey, Blackpink was good too!”

“Your companies forbid you guys to interact. You wouldn't know!”

“HEY!”

“I'm not lying, at least!”

“I dated Taehyung for your reminder, so I call that I win!”

As Jennie said that, y/n couldn't help but pout in defeat. Of course, she mentioned dating. Jennie loved it; cute puffy cheeks and sad look on y/n were to die for. She loved their small, useless interactions, always lighting her mood. Jennie just ended her relationship with Taehyung. It didn't hurt her, but with y/n, she acted fragile, as it affected her in some sort of way to seek comfort from her beloved.

“Oh, come on, don't get all puffy now!” Jennie said as she cupped her face, squeezing her cheeks. Y/N loved being babied, so of course, she gave in.

“BTS is still good,” she mumbled as Jennie laughed. She used the moment to wrap her arms around her, pulling her into a warm embrace.

How could she ever consider moving on?...

================================================================================================

y/n was too oblivious to Jennie, but not too much. She did notice all the things Jennie did that could question their friendship, but she chose to ignore them and told both (G)I-DLE member and ex-member that it was nothing, and they read into things too much when they heard Jennie say, “If I were a guy, I would 100% date y/n.”

But she was wrong. y/n was so wrong.

Both Jenie and y/n got invited to a party that a mutual idol friend invited them to; god knows what the hell was in those drinks, but she is wasted, so out of her mind, like she is flying and has no control. Maybe that is why she's pinned against the counter right now and is making out with Jennie. Her lips were soft and delicate; they tasted like cherries, and with a mix of the bitterness of alcohol, they both chugged down. y/n wouldn't deny that kiss was terrible; it was amazing and the best she ever had, but it was wrong. Was she kissing her best friend and idol a good idea? No. It was a horrible idea, but yet she didn't push her away; maybe it was alcohol getting to her head and making her fuzzy all over her body. She didn't decline Jennie, which caused the black-haired girl to get cocky and full of confidence with her hands and body. It turned into a messy and sloppy make-out session, obviously led by Jane. Her one hand cupped y/ns cheek while the other one was around her waist, pulling her deeper into her. The kiss was the only thing y/n remembered from that night, but the following day, she woke up in Jennie's mansion, naked, covered in love bites, and only bed sheets covering her.

Her heart dropped.

This was never meant to happen with Jennie. She felt like crying, and all she could do was look around for her clothes. Instead, she found nicely folded clothes that probably belonged to Jennie, with a note saying, “Your clothes are being washed. Wear these. Let me know when we are up. We should talk.” 

y/n hated talking and being comforted; it made her weak, and she always ended up crying or bursting out. But she also couldn't escape the reality, they fucked. It was terrible; her body was weak, and she barely got clothes on. She stared at the mirror for a good 5 minutes. How could she face her now? It was about to come crashing down. She was going to lose her friend and idol she admired all because she was too wasted to control herself and threw herself onto her; at least, that’s what she thought. If y/n could, she would’ve dragged herself by the hair and beat her so much. While she dreamed of that being somehow possible standing in front of a mirror, Jennie walked in; her face was relaxed like what happened last night was nothing, and y/n was overthinking about marks and waking up naked.

“Listen-”

“Drink the soup first; you drank a lot last night.”

It was cold. Y/N wanted to cry. Everything was definitely falling apart, but all she could do was listen to Jennie and go downstairs for her soup. She sat in silence; what was she even meant to say? She wanted to run, but that would make the situation even worse, so she took it all in, calming herself for the future outcome of their friendship.

On the other hand, Jennie managed to calm herself before Y/N woke up, creating a script for what she should say to Y/N. She felt like passing out. She took advantage of Y/N when she was drunk, and now she probably blames herself. Jennie hates herself just as much as her job. But as she got lost, Y/N was done with soup, trying to snap her out of her thoughts. 

“Jen… Jennie….Jennie!!” she yells the last part as Jennie looks up like a confused cat, making y/n melt right away

“Right, let's talk.”

This wouldn't ruin their friendship, would it? y/n thought to herself as they sat down on the couch.

“Okay, so-” “I'm sorry-” they said at once, making them chuckle even under the tension between two of them.

“You go ahead first,” said y/n since it seemed like Jennie was ready to apologize.

“I'm so sorry for what we did. I took advantage and used you for my benefit. I never meant this all to happen; we were drunk and not thinking straight, but I can’t blame you one tiny bit even. I'm sorry about this, and I understand if you want to stop being my friend after this because I can't stay just as friends after everything,” Jennie said in almost one breath, making her gasp as she finished.

y/n had the most challenging time taking in the last part. What does Jennie mean by can't stay friends? What does she want from her? Does she want to become her lover? No way. She never viewed Jennie like that, and now she’s even more lost.

“Wait, w-what do you mean?”

“I know it's weird, bizarre… but I’ve liked you for a while, and before you reject me, I know you won't view me that way, but I want to mean something in your life.”

“You mean a lot in my life, Jennie,” y/n said hopelessly, not understanding what she meant.

“What I mean is… god, it's weird,d but friends with benefits? I know it's a horrible idea, but I'd rather be like that with you than just a friend because I can't imagine myself staying away from you after this.”

Everything seemed to stop around y/n. Friends with benefits? That is crazy; she never imagined herself like that, but somehow, with Jennie, the idea wasn’t bad. It was better than completely losing her best friend. But she hasn't answered at all. Physically, she was frozen, which caused Jennie to worry.

“Listen, I’ll understand if you do not want to do this-”

“I’ll do it.”

“What?-”

“I said I would do it.”

“W-why??”

“It's better than losing you, Jen.”

Her heart skipped a beat. So she was up for it? What? This isn't like y/n at all. Why the sudden change? But she snapped out of her thoughts. y/n chose her, is what mattered to her the most.

“Are you sure”

“Yes, Jen.”

================================================================================================

It was a horrible idea.

Not because Jennie hated sleeping with y/n; no, she loved getting to touch her like none else could.

She hated it because of the conditions y/n put up.

If we find someone we want to date, we stop.

No strings attached

Everything is just physical

Avoid the public eye at all cost

She hated 2nd and 4th the most. She wanted to show off, she wanted everyone to know, but they were still just friends. She also hated the fact that she had no right to get jealous.

Well, she broke that one.

Because for that reason, there's a girl on the ground, nose bleeding. She hated seeing y/n with someone else. She hated it more than her job. Someone touching her waist made her blood boil. And this specific girl, Wonyoung, had to be a victim of her rage.

The girl was pretty, known, and sweet—y/n's exact type, which Jennie hated even worse. It was apparent that the girl took a big liking to y/n. Lip lick, gaze, movement, hands, leaning in—everything was right before her, so what would she do? Storm over and drag her on the ground until someone stopped her.

Nails digging into her arm, trying to stop her. The hands were soft; it was y/n. Why was she defending her? She couldn’t hear anything around her. Everything went blank. Screams were muffled as she stared at the girl, who stared back with horror, holding her arm against her nose. A group of people managed to pull her away from the girl. 

She then saw y/n kneeling to Wonyoung, helping her calm down and breathe, but she was too dizzy to reach out or say anything; it felt like a trance she was stuck in. She slowly gained back control, but why was Jennie crying? Shouldn’t Wonyoung be crying right now? But yet, she's the one who drew the blood, knocking the girl, yet she is the one crying. Was it fear? Of course, it was fear. Not a fear of being charged for assault but a fear of losing her beloved, y/n.

Did she cross the line? Again?

No, this couldn't be happening. She worked so much even to mean something to y/n.

She couldn’t have messed this up. . .

A/N: Woo, I finally finished this. It's been in my drafts for a while. This is my first time writing, so errr, let me know how I did . . .

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t a g l i s t: @shozeu @yoontoonwhs @1luvkarina @yeetaberry127 @xen248 @lisaswifey @gtfoiydlyj @addorations @pandafuriosa60 @saysirhc @aerithykly @whr4nakin @multiliker @sixflame438 @hyessemble @doublebunv

[daenysx]

Hi! I hope you're doing well. Idk if my request got lost honestly but is it okay if i re-send my request?

This is about modern!Aemond's family. You hc that Aelyx is a mommy's boy. How do you imagine Aelyx and Aemond bond? Is there a time where they get to spend with each other?

hi, lovely !! i'm sorry, it's probably my fault because i remember seeing your request during the sleepover but i didn't answer it and it all got messy in my inbox. thank you for taking the time to send it again, i hope you enjoy <33333

modern!aemond targaryen x fem!reader, fluff

aemond targaryen is quite literally addicted to buy new books.

he has a perfect excuse for it now, it's not only for me- the kids will enjoy it as well. you like that about your husband, even when he puts his books everywhere at home. he's not messy, never, but he likes being able to reach any book he wants any time. he says they are organized in their own way. you won't argue with him, he knows how to charm his way out.

tonight you're taking alyssa for her first official girls night. aunt helaena invited her with the biggest smile on her face, she said it'll be fun, jaehaera will be there after all. there'll be lots of snacks, lots of conversations, and maybe alyssa can sleep early but it's okay. she's almost seven years old now, she likes being included.

she says goodbye to aemond with a big kiss on his cheek. he returns the kiss with an even bigger one, and a good hug that lasts for a few long seconds. you also get a kiss from him, and give him a promise to send pics of alyssa and jaehaera playing together.

aelyx hugs you next. he's a bit more clingy these days, an adorable boy with chubby cheeks and aemond's eyes. you kiss him many many times, tell him to have a good time with daddy.

when you leave, the boys of the house are alone. aemond takes his son in his arms, carries him to the couch because he always gets a bit upset when he sees you leave. he holds aemond's sweater in his tiny hand as aemond settles down on the couch.

this is where the books come into the picture. aelyx adores books. he's like a mini aemond, at least that's what aegon says, he likes touching the pages and looking at the pictures. he likes when one of you reads a part out loud for him. he falls asleep quicker when aemond goes through his favorite sleep story.

it's almost his bed time. aemond got him his favorite book, it's full of pictures and short paragraphs for his daddy to read out loud.

"shall we look at the pictures first?" aemond asks as his baby settles down on his lap comfortably. he'll probably fall asleep in a few minutes but it's okay. aemond rubs his big hand on his son's back in circles.

"yes, please." the boy says. "this one."

his tiny finger points the picture of a princess, there's a knight standing next to her. this was alyssa's favorite picture once. aemond gets a sense of nostalgia.

"oh, yes." aemond says softly. "do you like the princess?"

"looks like mommy."

"she does look like mommy. what about the knight?"

"hmm." aelyx lifts his head and puts it back on aemond's chest. no lovely thoughts about the knight apparently.

"can i read this part?" aemond asks. "it's the one about the knight saving the princess."

"okay." aelyx agrees. his eyes are half open, silver hair messy from being snuggled to aemond.

daddy always uses his softest voice when he's reading. it doesn't matter which book he reads. there's one about quantum physics, another one about ethical theories, there's alyssa's favorite fairytale, and it's always the same tone of his voice.

you told aemond that the kids adore his voice once, he quickly fell in love with this thought. he reads out loud until his throat hurts and aelyx loves it. it's a story book now because of his bed time but he'd gladly listen to one of aemond's politics books if it meant to hear daddy's voice for minutes.

"so they ran until they could reach to the forest. the knight turned to look back when he heard a voice, someone was behind the trees-"

aemond stops when he hears a tiny snore. a nice breathing sound coming from his baby on his chest. he takes his phone and sends a quick selfie to you, letting you know aelyx is asleep.

he stays there for a few minutes. it's always a nice feeling to hold his son in his arms, he resembles aemond in many ways but he also doesn't. he looks like him, thinks like him, talks like him. aemond knows he'll be better, though. at least aelyx will have a dad who tries his best to be included in his kids' lives.

[toxic3mmy]

prompt: you wake up in a girl’s body and fuck your best friend

okay soooo, i got this idea from an ao3 one shot i read the other day and well, this came outta it

it may not be everyones cup of tea but i always loved gay fics where one guy magically turned into a woman??

IDK

ALSO IM REALLY DEPRESSED SO I LIED ABT GETTING TO UR REQUESTS DONT HATE MEEEE MY BOOBIES <3

warnings: SMUTTTT, mentions of witchcraft and body switching

you and quackity were best friends from a very young age. you and him were inseparable, as if you were one person.

the two of you went through school together. everything changed when his youtube career took off and he changed his focus to that which of course you didn’t mind. you thought it was so awesome the way he was passionate about this.

the two of you were so close that living together through college eventually turned into living together as adults. now, you were working at a law firm as an intern while alex pursued his online career.

truthfully, you were in love with your best friend. you had been from a very young age, it was only natural for you to fall so hard for him.

on a drunken night, you decided to come clean. you told him how much he meant to you. you confessed that you were in love with him.

he smiled sadly and hugged you close

“i wish you were a girl”

those were his drunken words and the two of you never spoke about it again

but within your friend group, everyone liked to tease the two of you as if you were gay together. of course you would enjoy every single interaction like this, hell you two were even dared to kiss once!

it was too easy to fall for your best friend

—

you had gone to visit your family in mexico for a few days and finally you were home. you walked into your shared home as quickly and quietly as possible so that you didn’t wake alex up.

your trip was great. you got to catch up with family and spend some quality time together.

while there, you confessed to your favorite and closest cousin about your feelings for alexis. she was very accepting of your sexuality and even encouraged you to go for it.

you filled her in on what happened when you did confess to alex and her eyes lit up with a devious look. she had an idea and although you were a bit skeptical, you agreed.

you knew she was learning the traditions of brujeria in your family and you were really interested in it. but what she wanted to do was crazy. she wanted to try something new and of course you agreed, not expecting anything to come of it because of how impossible it seemed.

so the two of you spent the last day of your trip together so that she could work on it. and well, you went home that same night.

the next day, you woke up like any normal day. you sluggishly walked to the bathroom and relieved yourself. you felt a warmth trickling down your legs and you were speeachless

“aw shit” you murmured to yourself as you knelt down to clean the floor of your piss

you couldn’t believe it worked

you looked at yourself in the mirror and loved what you saw. your face was a bit more round, your hair reached your ass now, and you had a great rack. you were ecstatic, practically gawking over yourself

and then the fear set in when alex knocked on your door saying that breakfast was ready

“uh… im not feeling well! go ahead and eat without me, thanks” you said, trying your hardest to deepen your voice

“are you sure? whats wrong? your voice sounds weird, are you sick?” he asked worriedly

“i think it’s a virus or something, don’t worry”

“i wanted to have a little day with you since you’re back from mexico… i guess we could postpone it until you feel better”

“thanks” you said quickly, hoping he would go already

“are you… going to stay in there all day? i mean, at least let me in so i can take care of you” he sighed, resting his head against the door

“n-no! im fine, really!”

“c’mon y/n, let me in so i can at least make sure you don’t die in there” he laughed

there was absolutely no way to hide this

“okay but… please don’t freak out” you said as you quickly started to look for a t shirt to put on

all you had on were loose boxers but they felt weird. you didn’t have any bras, obviously, and so you had no choice but to wear a tight fitting white wife beater

“i wont” alexis said softly

“close your eyes”

he obliged and you carefully unlocked the door, leading him into the bedroom

“before you open your eyes, i think i need to—“

he opened his eyes and his mouth dropped

“um… what…?”

“please let me explain!”

“okay, who are you… i get it if you wanted an autograph or a picture but what the hell?? why are you in my house right now?”

“what?… alexis! i’m not some crazed fan that broke in! it’s me.. it’s y/n..” you exclaimed

“no you’re not, what the fuck are you talking about! look, i don’t believe in hitting women but if you don’t leave my goddamn house in three seconds, you’re toast buddy!” he yelped and picked up the nearest weapon like thing which just so happened to be a lamp

you blinked at his attempt at being tough and burst out laughing uncontrollably

“lady! i am so serious! what the hell is wrong with you? oh my god… you escaped a mental hospital and you’re using my house as a hideout aren’t you?!”

you couldn’t stop laughing at him, this was just way too hilarious!

“okay i am dialing 911–“

“wait! please… just listen to me okay? i didn’t expect for this to happen… but it’s me. it’s y/n”

“you really are a nut, aren’t you?”

“i can prove it! look… it’s the matching tattoo we got when we were 18” you pulled your t shirt down to show the tattoo littered on your collarbone

he put down the lamp and sat on your bed. he didn’t know what to think. he nervously ran his hand through his hair

“oh god… how did this—?”

“i—i” you stuttered, trying to figure out if you should tell him the truth

“i swear you didn’t have tits the last time i saw you… and your face looks so… different” he softly held your chin in his hand, studying your newly feminine features

“brujeria” you blurted out, cheeks flushed with his touch on your face igniting a fire inside your chest

“w-what?”

“i… my family does brujeria and i tried this new thing and i swear i didn’t expect it to work! ive heard of it working but ive never seen it for myself and well…”

“so… you did this to yourself?”

you nodded, almost feeling shame

“but why?”

“i had a talk with my cousin in mexico and well… you told me you wished that i were a girl…. and i thought maybe things could be easier this way, better, even. i really didn’t think it would happen…”

“so…” alexis cleared his throat, “you’re um, fully a female now?” his face turned red in an instant and you couldn’t help but laugh

“yeah, i mean, i went to use the bathroom and that’s when i noticed…”

“no way…”

“yeah..”

“and so… why are you practically naked?” he laughed nervously, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants

“dude! look at these fucking tits! i don’t own any bras and god they’re already giving me back pain.. i need to get dressed so i can go back and see my cousin or see a doctor! i can’t stay like this—”

he stayed quiet for a while before saying breathlessly,

“i don’t want you to go”

“i… i have to go… i have to fix this” you said quietly as you began to rummage through your drawers to find suitable underwear since you obviously didn’t own any panties. you changed into boxer briefs and shrugged. it would have to do

alex quietly stood from where he was sitting and he stood behind you, looking down at you with a look on his face that you’ve never seen before

“god.. you’re so tall” you whispered as you stopped what you were doing and looked up at him

“you’re so fucking short, it’s really cute” he smiled before grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder

“hey! what the hell! put me down!” you squirmed in his arms and that earned a harsh smack to your boxer clad ass

he took you to his bedroom and practically threw you onto his bed. he stared at you with the same look as before, his eyes filled with lust, as he threw his beanie to the ground and took off his t shirt. he threw his shirt somewhere behind him before slowly making his way to you.

you were sat up with your knees to your chest against the wall

“u-uhm.. why um.. why are we here? i told you i have to go!! i have to fix this shit” you rambled nervously, earning a deep chuckle from alexis

“shh, just let me admire you..” he was now next to you on the bed as he carefully tucked your hair behind your ear

“what are we doing alex?” your whisper dissipated into the thick tense air surrounding the two of you

alexis didn’t respond, instead he gently grabbed the hem of your t shirt and pulled it off of your body. your new set of tits were now on display, your nipples perking up instantly as your best friend trailed his fingertips along your chest. you hiss at the sensation of his cold hands and you feel something beginning to build up inside, just beneath your bellybutton

“o-okay…i get it, it get it. this is about that stupid thing we talked about! look, it was funny back then but right now it’s not okay, i need to see my cousin or a fucking doctor!”

“you mean that thing about how if one of us woke up as a chick then we’d fuck?” he laughed, now trailing his fingers underneath your chin

“y-yeah but it was hypothetical! i didn’t think we’d ever actually be in this situation i mean, it’s just not normal!”

“so, do you want me to stop?” he murmured against your neck, leaving tiny butterfly kisses there

“i-i don’t know okay? but it doesn’t help when you’re touching me and you have your lips on me and god damn i forgot how sexy you looked without a shirt on…”

“you think this is easy for me? feel what you do to me, baby girl” he guided your hand to his clothed dick and your eyes went wide with how hard he was

“oh my god… stop it! fucking shit dude! you can’t just have me touching your dick! a-and now im fucking leaking or something, i don’t know! it’s all warm and wet down here! i don’t know what to do!” you complained, almost whining, not realizing that what you needed was him inside of you

“yeah? i bet your tight little cunt is soaked, isn’t it?” he asked, almost hovering above you

you couldn’t respond, you were too overwhelmed with so many emotions at once

alexis began to lean into you more and more and god it was getting harder to resist him as his strong cologne infiltrated your little brain

finally, his lips were on yours. he kissed you so gently, as if at any moment you could break. you pulled him closer to you and wrapped your arms around his toned back, melting into him

one of his hands balanced him above you while his other hand began to play with your perky tits. you were grinding into him as he rolled your sensitive nipple in between his thumb and forefinger

“o-oh my god! that feels amazing..” you bucked into him more, rubbing your cunt against his leg. you were so frustrated and begging silently for any kind of friction

“slow down princesa, there’s no rush. i promise ill take care of you, okay?” he said in a sweet voice that only turned you on even more

you nodded and your eyebrows furrowed together as his mouth was now attached to one of your boobs, the other was pinching at your already sensitive nipple. you let out soft whimpers as he pawed at your chest delightfully

“g-god… this feels so wrong but so fucking good” you said breathlessly, earning a little laugh from the boy above you

his lips kissed and sucked a trail lower and lower until he reached your boxers. he licked his lips and hooked his fingers under the waistband, sliding them down your legs. you were trembling as he kissed down the front of your pussy. finally, he ran his tongue flat against what you now knew was your clit. your hands instantly buried themselves in his soft hair, pulling it in the process

“you okay?” he asked, pausing for a second. you nodded furiously and he got back to work instantly

his tongue ran circles around the bundle of nerves that were now throbbing. you bucked your hips further into his face without even noticing

suddenly, you felt a finger at your entrance. it stung ever so slightly and immediately turned into pleasure as he curved it upwards. he pumped his finger into you and continued lapping at your swollen bud. the second he added another finger, tears were rolling down your face

“just like that! oh fuck..” you cursed, back arching as you reached up and clung onto his bedsheets

alex was basically making out with your clit now. his two long fingers were curved perfectly inside of you. you were bouncing on his fingers at this point. it all felt so so good

“you taste so good y/n” alex said as he came up for air momentarily

your hands came down and were now shoving his face in between your trembling thighs. his tongue moved even faster now, syncing with his fingers that were plunging into you.

you were restless, squirming and writhing as the sound of your moans and your wetness filled the room. you felt yourself chasing your climax. your thighs clamped shut, forcing alex to stay right there and not move an inch.

as your walls clenched around your best friend’s fingers, alex was being completely engulfed in your sweet pussy. his fingers curved up one more time inside of you and your body paused completely.

you saw stars and felt yourself leaking cum out onto his fingers. you caught your breath and closed your eyes. after a few moments, alex broke the silence

“so… was i any good?” alex asked, wiping your juices from his chin, a shit eating grin on his lips

“shut your mouth and take off your pants” you rolled your eyes

alexis laughed loudly and obliged, gaking off the remaining clothes he had on. you instantly sat up on your knees, your attention completely on him

you took over, pushing his pants and underwear down in one swift motion. his erection sprang free, and you stared at it with a mix of fascination and hunger. He watched your gaze, feeling a surge of pride and desire that made him ache even more

“holy shit! dude, your dick is huge!” you said in awe, almost drooling

“open up princess” he smiled and pumped himself gently

you opened your mouth gingerly. as he lay his tip on your tongue, your hand wrapped around the base of his cock. your other hand cupped his balls, grabbing at them

“you… you sure you haven’t sucked a dick before? you’re doing this so well” he grunted

“believe it or not, your dick is the first to ever touch these lips” you laughed and took him into your mouth almost entirely

alexis whimpered, one of his hands pushing the back of your head onto him further

of course you choked but alex was still enjoying this and you were definitely taking in every little whiny sound he made

you sucked his tip gently, and looked up at him through your doe eyes with your pupils blown completely, your lips wet and swollen, hair a mess, and alex almost came at the sight

“lay down” he said gently but firmly

you did as he told you and alex propped your legs up as if he were going to eat your pussy a second time. instead, he slipped himself in between your legs and hovered over you

carefully, he entered you, savoring the tightness that surrounded him. you gasped, your eyes fluttering shut as you adjusted to the sensation of his thickness stretching you. he waited, giving you a moment to breathe, before he began to move.

alex was in pure bliss, loving how warm and tight your cunt was. he completely forgot that this was your first time doing this, involuntarily speeding up before immediately stopping as you made a sound of pain

“okay look i respect you, you have game dude but jesus christ you need to fucking chill ! i’ve never done this shit before… at least not with a pussy” you tried to laugh off the sting

“i am so sorry y/n, you just feel so fucking good around me. i didn’t mean to hurt you, princesa” he spoke with a worried expression on his face

“sit back, okay?” you said suddenly and alex laid down, watching you crawl into his lap. a smirk made its way onto his face as he realized what you were doing

you straddled him, slowly taking him into you as you sat all the way down on his lap. you still felt some pain but it wasn’t as bad. you slowly lifted yourself up and slid back down again, your hand on his belly as he watched you intently

you gasped as his fingers pressed against your clit, sending waves of pleasure crashing through you. your hips picked up the pace, seeking more, and he eagerly gave it, his movements growing more deliberate with every moan that escaped your lips.

“take it like a good girl… “ alexis groaned as his head fell back in pleasure

you continued to move, his cock hitting you at the perfect angle inside and the pressure of his digits on your clit motivating you to go faster

“that’s it, princess” alexis praised as he watched you bounce up and down

his free hand found your breasts, kneading them as you rode him, your breaths growing more ragged with every thrust

“oh god, you’re so fucking deep! a-alex!” you moaned as you rode his cock

your pace was slowing down as you were growing tired. alex sat up and held you close. your arms rested around his neck and you kissed him passionately as he thrusted into you while you sat on his lap

“say my name again baby, say it” he kissed you on the mouth roughly as his hands held your hips in place and he fucked into you faster now

“alex! fuck… i’ve wanted your cock inside of me for so fucking long, i need more, please!” you pleaded

your eyes locked onto his, teeth biting down on your lower lip as you felt another orgasm building. your walls tightened around him, and you could see the effect it was having on him, his jaw clenching and his eyes darkening with lust. you leaned forward, your breasts brushing against his chest, and whispered into his ear, "I'm going to cum on your big fucking cock”

your movements grew erratic as alex pushed you back slightly, giving you a new angle for him to fuck you senselessly in. the two of you made a sort of ‘v’ shape in this new position as you leaned away from one another and your sex met his in perfect rhythm

your nails dug into his hands that were on your hips, leaving half-moons that would surely bruise. he didn't care, the pain only added to his pleasure, heightening every sensation

the sight was too much for him. your fucked out expression begging for more, your supple tits bouncing as your hips crashed together. he lost control, his orgasm ripping through him like a storm. he filled you with his warmth, his hips jerking as he emptied himself into you.

you came immediately after he did, loving the way you felt his thick cock twitch inside of you

you stopped moving and collapsed onto his chest, your breathing ragged and your heart pounding like a drum in her ears. alexis wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as your breathing gradually returned to normal

“you okay?” he asked, he felt your body trembling again

“yeah, just hold me okay?” you nuzzled into his chest

“okay” he said, pressing a sweet kiss to your temple

[echobx]

soulmates 1 - jj maybank x fem!reader

summary: y/n is on a double date with her boyfriend when she runs into her actual soulmate

warnings: none

word count: 3.5k

author's note: idk what to say

masterlist

In a world where you could hear your soulmate's thoughts, as long as they were thinking about you, as long as they were at least 16, it was still very difficult to find them. Most people would go their whole lives without even meeting the person they were connected to, most people had found their peace with it, and so had you…

“I'm taking you out for lunch,” your boyfriend, Kelce, pressed a kiss to your cheek. You had never heard his thoughts, but that was okay. Maybe you were secretly sad about it, but a lot of people had the same issues as you. You had anticipated your sixteenth birthday like any other kid, but even more so because your parents were soulmates, having grown up together they had gotten lucky. But you weren't blessed with the same luck. This wouldn't mean that you didn't love your boyfriend. No, Kelce was nice and sweet and loved to show you off to his Kook friends.  The split between Kooks and Pogues had never been to your favor. Your parents were hardworking middle class, too poor to be Kooks, too wealthy to be Pogues. 

“Where are we going?” You smiled at him. “Country Club, haven't been there in a while, especially with you.” He smirked and you had to laugh.  “I see, you just wanna show me off,” you giggled, not at all foreign to the concept. You got up and tugged on your dress to make it fall evenly.  “You are so beautiful,” he complimented you and leaned down into a kiss.  You were an uneven couple, everyone could see it, but you didn't mind it at all. You knew that they all just saw him as the rich kid that got in fights with Pogues because he couldn't keep his mouth shut. But to you, he was kind and loving and just the best boyfriend you could wish for. He made you forget that you weren't even soulmates.  “Will the others be there?” you asked while the two of you walked out of his house and towards his car.  “Just Topper and I think his new girlfriend. He's been so up my ass ever since Sarah dumped him for that Pogue John B. I hope the new one will help,” Kelce said and held your door open so you could get in.  “I hope he can forget about Sarah, it's not like they were soulmates,” you noted while he got in too. “Right?”  “I don't know, he never told me,” Kelce shrugged and started driving. 

It had been a real scandal when the Kook princess had run off with the Pogue, no one could understand why she would do such a thing, but to you, it was clear. You didn't have to look at them twice when you saw them around town, they were clearly meant for each other, they had gotten lucky.  You hoped that you might find your person once you moved away to college. The statistical probability of finding your soulmate in a close radius to your home was pretty low. That's why multiple companies were now making big profits with the desperation of people who just wanted to be happy. They created apps and websites to “help” you find “the one”, but even those only helped in about 30% of the cases.  All in all, your chances were pretty low, but you had just turned 17, and had been with Kelce for only three months. Your life was still ahead of you, your chances were still not completely low. But you also told yourself to not hope, to not get caught up in the search because you didn't want to end up like the people they sometimes showed on TV. 

“… and then he just hits a hole in one on the last game, can you believe it?” Kelce laughed, and you realized that you hadn't paid any attention to his story.  “Impressive,” you note and smile at him.  “Yeah, but God, I miss that guy.” It took you a moment to figure out that he was talking about Rafe. Rafe Cameron, Kook prince, technically after the death of his father Ward, the new Kook King, but you didn't care so much about semantics. He had left Kildare, where to, you didn't know, but you knew he was out for the big money, just like his dad.  You reached for your boyfriend's hand and held it, hoping he would find some sort of solace in your touch. You hadn't known Rafe well either, you still didn't know many of Kelce’s friends because you had mostly been focused on each other at the start.  “I think he's gonna come back.” Your words gave him a bit of hope, and he smiled before parking the car. 

Kelce got out and opened the door for you, like he always did, like a gentleman would. “Chivalry is a must,” your mom had always told you. From a young age on, she had made sure that you knew your worth and held your standards up high.  “Thank you,” you blushed as he closed the door again and pulled you into his side.  “We're going all out, sugar. Double dates deserve some extravaganza,” he chuckled.  “Oh, how darling of you,” you said in a pretentious voice, and the two of you laughed even more. It was easy with Kelce, he made you feel good about yourself, and you had wished nothing more than for him to be your one and only. 

You walked inside and someone guided you to your table, Topper and his new girlfriend, Sheila, already sitting there.  “I'm sorry for being late,” you apologized to Top and gave him a quick hug before sitting down opposite of him.  “Oh no, we were just a little early,” he brushed it off and then started talking to Kelce about a new boat he wanted to buy.  You would've talked to Sheila if her eyes hadn't been fixed on the waiter. 

He was tall, had blond tousled hair and his shirt sat tightly on his body, showing off that he had muscles although looking rather lean compared to Kelce.  ‘Not bad,’ you thought to yourself, and his head perked up, and he started looking around. ‘Just a coincidence, nothing more, there are many people here who are thinking about him. He's working, of course you think about your waiter. Hell, Sheila hasn't been able to even take her eyes off him and Topper doesn't even notice,’ you had turned back to looking at Kelce, not noticing that the boy was now eyeing your table very carefully.  ‘Don’t tell me she's a fucking Kook,’ you could suddenly hear an annoyed voice in your head.  “Everything okay?” Kelce asked and brushed a strand of hair out of your face. “You look like you've seen a ghost,” he joked, and you shook your head, trying to regain composure.  “Yeah, no, I'm okay, just remembered the time I saw a guy run over a cat. I don't know why I thought of that,” you lied, and he gave you a quick kiss. You couldn't let them know what had just happened to you, especially not Kelce, you couldn't break his heart. 

“Topper,” the boy came over and greeted him with a fake smile, not even giving Kelce or you any attention.  “JJ, nice to see you,” Topper laughed lightly.  ‘JJ? Peculiar name,’ the thought popped into your head, but he didn't turn to you, instead he looked directly at Sheila, who seemed to be more than intrigued by him.  “What can I get you?” JJ asked, still only looking at her.  Topper ordered for the two of them, as well as for Kelce and you because JJ still hadn't paid us any attention. Then he walked away and you had to scoff. 

“What an asshole, right?” you mumbled to yourself, and Kelce immediately kissed your cheek.  “The amount of times I wanted to rip that smug smile off that Pogue’s face,” he hissed and watched JJ vanish inside. Your heart got heavier, it had been clear that there was something between them, but the fact that the boy enraged Kelce this much meant nothing good.  “He couldn't seem to keep his eyes off of you,” you chuckled at Sheila, trying not to seem too disappointed by it.  She laughed and put her hand on Topper’s shoulder. “Oh, that Pogue wishes.” But you knew the look she had given him, everything else was just a very bad lie in your eyes.  “Yeah,” you laugh quietly, before getting up. “I'm gonna go freshen up just a little,” you told Kelce and he nodded.  “Don't be too long, or I'll come find you,” he joked, a loving smile on his lips as you turned around and walked inside. 

‘Fucking Sheila? Why her? Why not me? I was right there, asshole!’ you screamed at JJ in your mind, knowing well enough that he would hear it.  ‘What are you talking about?’ the voice in your head replied, his voice.  ‘I didn't even want a fucking salad, okay! I wanted fries! But no, you couldn't even dare to look at us and ask what I wanted. And now I'm stuck with a stupid ass salad, because Topper is stupid,’ you let out all of your frustrations as you checked your makeup in the mirror of the restroom.  ‘Fuck!’ he exclaimed inside your head, and then it was silent again. 

You got back to the table and just a moment later JJ arrived with two of the four plates. He still didn't give you any notice until he came walking back, with a steak for Kelce and a plate of fries for you.  “She didn't order fries!” Kelce barked at him, but you just put your hand on his thigh.  “I did, I changed my order inside,” you lied without giving JJ a single look.  ‘Never seen Kelce act like a fucking dog. Who are you, pretty girl?’ JJ thought, but you couldn't let it show how much it made your heart falter.  “Why are you still standing here?” Sheila asked loudly, and you finally turned around to look at JJ. Your eyes met, and you couldn't be sure if it had been your own or his thoughts that let a silent “wow” slip.  “My bad, enjoy your food,” JJ said, still staring at you as he walked away, unable to take his eyes off of you, really.  “Why was he looking at you like that?” Kelce asked and you gulped lightly.  “I don't know,” you mumbled and started eating. 

‘What's your name, pretty girl?’ his voice was back in your head, and you nearly would've spit out your water. ‘You already know mine, so it's only fair. And it's not peculiar. I just don't like what my parents chose, so I'm doing my own thing,’ he explained, and you could see him walking around, doing his job while very casually trying to get to know you.  ‘I have a boyfriend,’ you remind him, but he just laughed inside your mind, a nice wholehearted laugh that sounded almost like music to you.  ‘I’m glad you like my laugh, princess, but don't forget about your boyfriend. Isn't he the best? Only tried to kill me last year,” JJ’s words made you choke on a fry.  “Hey, y/n, are you okay?” Kelce asked, and you nodded, taking a sip of water to try and calm your throat.  “Yeah,” you said and tried to smile at him. You knew of his temper, being the only one who could calm him down most times, but you would have never thought that he would actually willfully hurt someone so much that they would potentially die.  “We can leave if you don't feel so well,” he spoke in a soft voice, but you couldn't stop thinking about it. About how he must've hurt JJ, about what he could've done to him.  “I'm fine, really,” you pressed out and turned back to your plate, half empty, but you felt like eating another fry would just cause you to throw up. “I'm just gonna use the restroom real quick,” you excused yourself and all three of them gave you a weird look, but let you leave without further questions. 

‘Where did you go to, pretty girl? I didn't mean to scare you,” his voice was back in your mind.  “Stop talking!” you screamed and stopped in your tracks, you hadn't even noticed that you had actually said it out loud until the whole Country Club was staring at you. Quickly, you ran towards the restroom and hid in a stall.  You didn't know how much time passed as you hid and cried into yourself. This was definitely not how you had imagined it going, having him so close but so far, being caught in between a feud that you hadn't even known existed.  ‘Hey, princess, he's getting impatient, and I really don't wanna deal with that shit,’ JJ whispered to you.  ‘Y/n,’ you told him. ‘That’s my name. But everyone calls me y/n/n, apart from my parents, my parents call me Bean, because I only ate beans as a baby.’ You didn't even understand why you told him this very particular thing about yourself, when you had never let anyone know about your parents' weird nickname for you.  ‘Cute,’ he chuckled. ‘Will you come out again? I don't want to have to come in there, and then have to give you back to him as if he should have any claim over you,” JJ muttered, he was disgusted by the thought of Kelce kissing you.  ‘You don't have to be so mean, I can still hear you. Also, that's disgusting, he doesn't kiss like that,’ you thought but had to laugh about how weird he made it look in his head.  ‘Makes it more bearable though,’ JJ admitted.  ‘I have to talk to him, how the fuck am I supposed to do that? He already hates you.’ You buried your face in your hands.  ‘I won't let him hurt you, princess,’ he replied to your thoughts and the more you talked to each other just like that, the less you had to fight yourself to hide it, everything got easier. It was like listening to music while doing homework, as long as you kept on concentrating on what was in front of you, the music wouldn't bother you too much. But it also could be all encompassing as soon as you let it.  Yet you also wondered why he was so protective of you, a girl he had only just met.  ‘My best friend had a lot of issues, Sarah got hurt in the process, not badly but still. I don't want that for you, for us,’ JJ explained, and you wiped your tears away.  ‘Topper’s ex?’ you asked and stood up, wiping your dress down to seem more respectable again.  ‘Sarah, yes, I bet you heard. Kooks and Pogues don't always mix well, but she's a Pogue now,’ he spoke of it so casually as if he didn't mind at all.  “I'm neither,” you spoke up, but you knew he could still hear you.  ‘Your boyfriend is a Kook, that's already too much,’ he said and the disgust that he held for Kelce was incredibly draining.  “I don't choose who I fall for. It's not my fault,” you told yourself as if it was a manifestation. 

‘Do you really love him?’ JJ asked just as you walked out of the restroom, he was leaning on the wall opposite of the door, eyeing you wearily. “I don't know,” you replied out loud, and he couldn't help but smile, suddenly everything you had thought to know of love was thrown out the window. This feeling was completely different from anything you had ever felt before, and you never wanted to feel anything else ever again. ‘I would kiss you, but I'm not gonna give him any ammunition to hate you more than he already will once he finds out,’ he thought as his eyes darted down to your lips. It was like you were frozen, both unable to move as you stood on each side of the hallway.  ‘Probably better.’ You smiled and blushed a little over his boldness.  “They have been asking for you quite a lot, wondering where you are, why you aren't coming back. And yet not one of them made a single move to go check on you,” JJ spoke with a low voice.  “I should really go back then,” you whispered, and he gave you a small smile before you turned and walked back to the table. You knew he felt the small tingling feeling that settled in your guts, you knew he could feel you because you could feel it in him too. No one had ever mentioned that it wasn't just thoughts, but a direct connection into the inner world of the other. 

“I'm sorry, I’m really not feeling too well,” you apologized while sitting back down at the table.  Topper eyed you, and you felt like he knew, like he could see it in your eyes. “I can drive you home,” he suggested sweetly.  “I don't want to cause any trouble, I can just call an Uber,” you said and turned to Kelce. “I'm really sorry.”  “Nonsense, let Topper drive you home and if you don't feel better I'll just come by, and we can watch a movie together.” He smiled and put his forehead to yours.  ‘Oh, vomit,’ JJ’s thought popped into your head just as Kelce placed a small kiss on your lips.  “Uh, yeah, we can do that,” you told your boyfriend and got up. “See you later then,” you said and walked away with Topper by your side. 

You didn't want to think of JJ; you didn't want to think of hurting Kelce; you didn't want to think at all, but as soon as you were sitting in Topper's pickup truck he turned to you.  “Tell me it's not JJ,” he said as if you had committed a crime.  “I don't know what you mean,” you lied.  ‘We really gotta work on your lying skills, princess,’ JJ chuckled.  “I know that look, I had to look at it for two months before Sarah admitted it to me. Promise me to not break his heart, it's already hard enough as it is,” Topper said and you nodded shyly.  “I didn't want this,” you said, but JJ just laughed, and you had a hard time pushing him into the back of your mind.  ‘Are you only good at lying when you're doing it to yourself?’ “I had hoped that it would be him, and then it wasn't, and I was okay with it. I didn't want this now, I was okay with it never happening. I don't want to hurt him,” you started crying and Topper leaned over and hugged you. He had never hugged you like that before, it felt good to be cared for by someone who wasn't Kelce for once. “Please don't tell him,” you whispered as Topper pulled away again.  “I won't, but you should, as fast as possible, actually. It's only been three months, you haven't even said I love you yet, right?” Topper asked and turned on the engine.  “Yeah, no, we haven't. I just don't know how to. How do you tell someone that?” you asked, but he couldn't give you an answer that wouldn't hurt either of you in the end.  ‘You just say, “Hey, Kelce, you big asshole, I'm actually already bound by the universe to the very charming, extremely hot and sexy JJ Maybank. See ya’” or something like that,’ JJ told you, but you couldn't reply, your heart felt too heavy, heavier than you ever imagined possible.

“Top?” you asked quietly. “Yes, y/n/n?” the boy answered just as he stopped in front of your building.  “Kelce hates him, JJ, I mean. They hate each other, don't they?” You already knew the answer, but you hoped for some more intel on it all.  “Yeah, it's not pretty. I tried to stay out of it, it was mostly Rafe's fault, but the Pogues aren't that innocent either. It's better if you tell him before anything happens, trust me. I don't want to see you get hurt,” Topper explained with a sad smile. You didn't know that he cared so much about you, never truly having considered him your friend.  “Will you look after him, or just make sure he doesn't do something stupid once I-” The words got stuck in your throat but Topper just nodded.  “Took me some time to understand it, that you don't have a choice in this. He's gonna have to accept it,” he said, and you opened the door to get out.  “Thank you,” you said and wanted to close the door to walk towards your home.  “Y/n? If you need anything, you can just call me, just because you and Kelce are gonna end, doesn't mean we aren't still friends,” he told you and you nodded.  “I'll remember, thanks for the ride,” you said goodbye and walked towards the apartment building.

please don't copy and/or post my work onto other platforms! ~e©ho

part 2

[nexility-sims]

𝐍𝐎. 𝟏𝟑   ❛ 𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐬𝐭 ❜   |   RENZO'S HOUSE, NAKAWE, OCTOBER 1991

❧  𝐝𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲  /  𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠  /  𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬  /  𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭.

Leonor knew she was imposing. Although with permission, she let herself into the most private circle of Renzo’s life, one from which he had barred her for months. There hadn’t been any negotiating it, and she couldn’t say whether that made it better or worse. Rather, she hadn’t tried to go where he didn’t seem to want her. She also hadn’t tried to discover whether it was a matter of wanting at all. He did want her. He had, with clarity and audacity, from the day they met. She’d seen how he treated people that he didn’t want but had yet to experience that kind of terrible disregard from him.

❧ i don't recall when these ideas came to me and melded together but i'm glad they did also hopefully goes without saying but there's time weirdness that'll be addressed subsequently ! also 2x maybe i’m wrong but there aren’t enough bj fantasies given how much some enjoy giving them, idk idk

𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐞 & 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐩𝐭 ↓

Leonor knew she was imposing. Although with permission, she let herself into the most private circle of Renzo’s life, one from which he had barred her for months. There hadn’t been any negotiating it, and she couldn’t say whether that made it better or worse. Rather, she hadn’t tried to go where he didn’t seem to want her. She also hadn’t tried to discover whether it was a matter of wanting at all. He did want her. He had, with clarity and audacity, from the day they met. She’d seen how he treated people that he didn’t want but had yet to experience that kind of terrible disregard from him.

Still, for all they discussed, the red lines and boundaries of their own relationship went without remark—either unspeakable or so self-evident as to require no demarcation. Leonor believed most of the time that it was the latter. She knew that her life had steadily cohered around his. The rhythm of it attracted her, able to fill the grave-silent vacuum where her own had once been. Although it had, important distinctions remained. Now, waking up in his bed, surrounding by what looked to be all of his worldly possessions, knowing he allowed her to be there because she needed him that much, because he cared about her that much, she suspected at least one distinction had blurred irrevocably. 

Just as quick as the realization took hold, so too did the understanding that it didn’t bother her. She noted she was alone in the room. That meant something. She took in the sight of everything bathed in daylight, from the careless stacks of books to the rumpled clothes strewn on the floor to the overflowing boxes shoved into the small room’s corners. It had seemed peculiar to her that he lived in the guesthouse instead of the perfectly suitable villa to which it belonged. Looking around, she began to appreciate why he would make such a choice. For anyone else, it would have been silly or, worse, performative. Leonor, rolling over into the pillows that smelled like him, felt she now unlocked some deeper knowledge of everything he had ever told her about himself—like she could feel what he felt when he claimed to be so uncomfortable and discontent in places other people might kill to experience. In that, yet another distinction dissolved. 

Renzo hadn’t answered the phone when Leonor called, and his flippant prerecorded message sounded cruel as it played. Her hope had been reassurance—comfort, really—in the clarity he tended to offer. Instead, the sound of his voice disheartened her further. Her mind raced all night without guidance to quiet it. It chased away sleep, banging together gut-wrenching thoughts with insistence and urgency. The idea of her mother’s belongings cast out into the world, ripped away before she could claim them for her own sentimental needs, felt just as discordant as the haphazard crashing of cymbals. She had grasped onto half-formed notions of how to retrieve these mysterious belongings, but a plan refused to cohere. Even after crying as she hadn’t in weeks, the burden of emotional exhaustion didn’t slow down the pace of her thoughts.  

She slept much better in Renzo’s bed, even if it was the first time she’d ever been in it. 

He was a private person and, anyway, she had eagerly brought him into her house. His opinion mattered to her as soon as he set foot inside; he liked the artwork in her dining room so much that she'd immediately gifted him one of the large pieces, frame and all. It perplexed him, as if he wasn't sure what he would do with it. 'You don't collect it?' she asked him. He shrugged. 'That's what everyone asks. I should smarten up, huh?' Leonor had imagined his home full of art—obscure, iconoclastic finds, too, not the low-hanging fruit. That exchange and several others kept her curious about what his home looked like.

Luckily, she was the nosy kind of curious. She asked around without shame on a couple of occasions, wondering aloud where he lived and what his house was like. She did know his address. He’d given it to her driver, at the end of long nights or when he left her house in the afternoon. All it told her was that he lived in a quiet, star-studded neighborhood that was the new money equivalent of her own. That wasn’t surprising, even if she imagined him in a trendy downtown apartment rather than one of those high-walled coastal villas. His friends offered less-than-colorful descriptions of what was inside. They seemed confused by the question, even. ‘It’s just a house.’ He wasn’t much for decorating. They went over to drink and smoke and and gamble and watch films. She could imagine it well enough, a gaggle of off-duty actors squished together on a big couch. What kind of couch, though? That was the root of it—she could imagine Renzo’s eyes lighting up at the sight of an old, ugly sofa in a dusty secondhand store, but she couldn’t quite picture him bringing it home with any purpose or intent. In the same way she inherited a house designed for someone else, she supposed he simply occupied someone else’s dream home. 

As it turned out, that was the case. Imposing fences, dense foliage, and locked gates hid all the houses on the street from view. Leonor had initially noted the averageness of the house itself, but she soon found herself more intrigued by the discovery that he resided in the guesthouse instead. She'd cast a glance back at the main house looming large and empty, then laughed as she turned back to the little doll’s home Renzo preferred. Inside, Leonor flipped on every light she encountered as she wandered around. She had felt a strange, sheepish delight that he wasn’t present to observe the way her eyes lingered on every detail. It was greedy, but she wanted to see everything that was his. 

The guesthouse possessed a neutral, modern style that didn’t represent Renzo very well, but he had made it his own. His old shoes piled up in the entryway. The living room, small to her but an open cavern in reality, bore the colorful imprint of his time spent there. VHS tapes clustered around the television set. Evidence of card games past littered the coffee table, along with books, a full ashtray, abandoned bottles of lukewarm beer. Leonor smiled at the little potted cactus. In the music nook, a record collection sat with a couple of guitars. Leonor envisioned him stretched out on the solitary lounge chair, reading the book tossed at its foot, making use of the hard candy or rolling papers on the side table in between chapters. She took one of the candies as she passed by, leaving behind her wrapper with those already discarded. 

The staircase led directly to the single bedroom. Leonor had been able to see in the moonlight, and she soon felt a tug of unease.  Even more than downstairs, Renzo’s bedroom looked like the sanctuary she had suspected his home must be. It was cluttered and overflowed with belongings, some collecting dust and others arranged as if he would return to them any minute. His very life was here. It fit in a single room. Some of it spoke for itself, and others were inscrutable symbols of stories she had yet to hear. What was it like, she wondered, to both live with such sentimentality and to be so without roots? For a moment, she had wanted to turn around and leave, as if she hadn’t earned the right to such an intimate look at him. Instead, she pulled the door shut and crawled into the unmade bed. 

Walking into the house, the nostalgic scent of stale smoke sunk into fabric greeted her. A fleeting recollection of climbing into her mother's personal car sprung to mind in response. The same smell clung to the sheets and pillows, melded with the sweet, earthen scents Renzo wore. She could all but hear her grandmother’s voice ranting about the acerbic stench she loathed, for reasons both hygienic and spiteful, but Leonor found the familiarity comforting. It smelled like her mother’s embrace the morning after a big fight, when she came inside from the balcony with a tired, apologetic smile on her face and last night’s smoke still in her hair. An ocean breeze blew inside from the open doors, and it ruffled Leonor’s hair as she turned to face the view. The water was barely visible through the foliage, but its shimmering in the distance was unmistakable. She listened to the wind, and the quiet city whisperings it carried, and soon felt at home.

As Leonor descended the spiral staircase the next morning, the sound of voices alerted her yet again to the fact that she was imposing. Renzo’s plans for the weekend hadn’t included her. She was supposed to be away and, in any case, he had mentioned meeting a friend. It didn’t occur to her as she’d pulled on her underwear and selected a shirt from the floor to wear—and only that, crucially—that he could be meeting someone at home, right now, while she slept her way from morning to early afternoon. Possibilities flashed through her mind as her steps down the staircase slowed. It could be someone important, like his agent, who sounded dour even on the telephone. Or, it could be a familiar face who would see her bare legs and just laugh. She decided to risk it and managed to pad all the way over to the sunken sitting area before Renzo looked up at her. 

“How’d you sleep?” he asked as she regarded his guest, a stranger, with a quizzical look.

“Hard,” she replied. "Knocked out.” 

Renzo chuckled, and the man sat across from him piped up, “Hey. I don’t know if you remember me. Jim.”

Leonor stared at his face. He was possibly the most non-Uspanian looking man she had ever seen, and his accent supported that notion. Still, she couldn't remember where she might have seen him. His was a forgettable face, too. “I don’t, sorry. Nice to meet you—again.” 

“Jim’s a photographer,” Renzo added. 

Leonor nodded. He looked like a photographer, and he looked like the kind of photographer that Renzo would befriend. Nonetheless, she feigned dismay, announcing, “Oh, no, I better go hide, then—!”

“Editorial, mostly,” Jim clarified with a laugh. “Yeah, I dabble in photojournalism, but strictly the kind that’s, you know, real news.” 

The conversation lulled while Leonor turned her attention back to Renzo, nudging him with her toes until he reached up to help her climb down onto the couch. Although Jim watched them, he may as well have not been present at all. Leonor wished he wasn’t. Buoyed by the satisfaction of having achieved a new kind of intimacy, Leonor hoped to float down the stairs and right into Renzo’s arms. She wanted a tour of the house, and she wanted to take her time in every part of it. In a sense, the day was halfway over, and it could have progressed like all of the sleepovers before it, making up for lost morning hours with late night ones. Renzo maintained late-rising night owl's hours, and Leonor was happy to follow him into bed and out of it irrespective of where the sun might’ve been sitting in the sky. Today, he was awake early with a friend, and Leonor had to settle for conveying her disappointment through expression alone. He smirked at her while he squeezed her thigh, and she took that as a wordless promise. 

Nestled between him and the couch, Leonor turned her attention back to Jim. “Jim, have you done anything I would recognize?” 

“Maybe,” he began, “But—”

“And you’re from Simerica, too?”

Jim chuckled, and Leonor felt Renzo react to that with his own amused scoff. 

“I met Renzo at the Beverly Hills Hotel,” Jim explained. “He walked into my shot and then told me to go fuck myself. Southern charm, this guy.”

Although there was affection in Jim’s tone, Renzo protested this characterization while Leonor snickered. It was believable, but perhaps that was the problem. “He was being a bitch about it. I wandered by. So what?”

“It was my first Interview job! I can admit I was a teeny bit on edge,” Jim retorted.

Again, they fell quiet while Renzo tended to the cigarette he’d been holding and Leonor observed from where she lay against his chest. 

Jim looked on. His expression shifted into one of careful concentration. He asked without any prelude, “Can I photograph you?” 

It wasn’t a question she couldn’t have anticipated, but Leonor was still surprised. She wrinkled her brow and cast another glance to Renzo before trying to clarify what Jim wanted. “Me?”

“Both of you. Together.”

“Um … When?”

“Now? Today. I have my camera right here.”

“It’s up to you,” Renzo murmured to her.

Indeed, Jim’s camera sat on the coffee table, perched atop a stack of tapes leftover from whatever difficult movie-watching decision Renzo had last made. Leonor looked at it, imagining the shuttering of its lens as it pointed toward her. What kind of photographs did Jim have in mind? She didn’t know what his work looked like, although his association with Renzo offered clues. He wouldn’t have befriended someone whose art he didn’t respect, and Renzo was just as well-acquainted with posing for cameras as Leonor herself. Had Jim taken photographs of him before, aside from whatever unintentional cameo he’d made when they first met? Polaroid flashes went off constantly during their nights of partying, but that, much like the hounding flashes of paparazzi, differed from what Jim was proposing. He wanted to photograph them in Renzo’s home. He would want a performance of candidity, that elusive desire of everyone in his profession. They would be relaxed, together, his object being their relationship, not either of the two individuals that formed it. It wasn't lost on her that he asked for a photo shoot while they ignored him in favor of each other.

Jim’s question, with Renzo’s gentle and immediate yielding, brought yet another once-sharp distinction into soft focus. 

“Well …” Leonor meant to forestall announcing a decision, but her tone gave it away. Jim smiled as she said to Renzo, “We do look good together. Not too many good quality daytime pictures, are there? Hm.”

Jim was eager to seal the deal. “Just a casual offer,” he insisted. “Just for fun. Perk of having interesting friends.”

Leonor nodded. He must have taken pictures of Renzo before. He acted like a bashful schoolboy with a surprising report card whenever she found photos of him to coo over. 'Put it away! It's embarrassing.' Those photographers had success with him, managing to coax out the version that played well with others and didn't resent his blessings. Fancy pictures taken by a friend would be something different. Perhaps Jim's photos had been monochrome closeups that turned his large, green eyes into a soft, warm gray and made even more pronounced the sharp lines of his face. Although she had seen countless photos of herself, she couldn’t fully see how she would fit into that frame—what they would look like together, through Jim’s mechanical eyes. 

“No publication? Nowhere?” she asked, forcing herself back to the concrete specifics. 

Jim shook his head. “I’ll give you prints to keep, and you can do whatever with them.” 

She felt a flutter. It was the kind of ingenuous excitement that always appeared with embarrassment nipping at its heels. What would she do, frame one and put it on her bedside table—stick it to her refrigerator with a cute magnet, tuck it into the sun visor of her car, keep it in her purse alongside her credit cards and notes-to-self? Even if they felt silly, there was nothing ridiculous in those suggestions. Her desire for what Jim offered was sincere. That, coupled with the subtle feeling of Renzo nuzzling his cheek against her hair, confirmed the suspicion she had awoken with less than an hour ago. Somehow, today was different. Every day after would have to be as well.

Surprised by the softness of her own words when she spoke, Leonor affirmed, “Okay, then. Sounds like fun.”

TRANSCRIPT:

[Leonor murmurs]

[Camera shutters, indistinct voices]

RENZO (O.S.) | Open your mouth—

[Birds chirping, Leonor laughs]

RENZO | How’d you sleep? LEONOR | Hard. Knocked out. [Renzo chuckles]

JIM | Hey. I don’t know if you remember me. Jim. LEONOR | I don’t, sorry. Nice to meet you—again.

RENZO | Jim’s a photographer. LEONOR | Oh, no, I better go hide, then— JIM | [laughs] Editorial, mostly. Yeah, I dabble in photojournalism, but strictly the kind that’s, you know, real news.

LEONOR | Jim, have you done anything I would recognize?

JIM | Maybe, but— LEONOR | And you’re from Simerica, too? JIM | I met Renzo at the Beverly Hills Hotel. He walked into my shot and then told me to go fuck myself. Southern charm, this guy. [Leonor snickers]

RENZO | He was being a bitch about it. I wandered by. So what? JIM | It was my first Interview job! I can admit I was a teeny bit on edge. [Laughter]

JIM | Can I photograph you?

LEONOR | Me? JIM | Both of you. Together. LEONOR | Um … When? JIM | Now? Today. I have my camera right here. RENZO | It’s up to you. LEONOR | Well … We do look good together. Not too many good quality daytime pictures, are there? Hm.

JIM | Just a casual offer. Just for fun. Perk of having interesting friends. LEONOR | No publication? Nowhere? JIM | I’ll give you prints to keep, and you can do whatever with them.

LEONOR | Okay, then. Sounds like fun.

[bellewintersroe]

Joe Liebgott x Reader.

two times Joe doesn’t want to come to you, and the one time he does… tw - swearing, talks of war and wounds, ptsd, 1940s terms, some descriptions of war and death but nothing too intense. I keep deleting and rewriting parts but I’m just not so happy with the ending, idk :/

The Crossroads, October 1944. “Joe… go see Nurse Y/l/n once you’ve done this.” Winters told him. “Yes, sir.” Yeah right. The last person who he’d be taking a visit to was Y/n, especially like this- all wound up and wounded. He’d report to nurse Smith instead, the other nurse for 2nd battalion to who he didn’t have such an… attachment towards. You see, it wasn’t that Joe disliked her. It wasn’t that at all. In fact it was more the complete opposite- his bond with Y/n was something he’d never experienced before. To get to the point, he was in love with her. But Joe refusing to be seen as anything other than the alpha male meant he sacrificed one vital human emotion when he was around her. Vulnerability. So instead of doing at Winters ordered, he simply stood a couple meters away from the aid station (it was a brick house they’d taken over) and just stared in contemplation. Joe had seen all the nasty side effects wound infections could cause, plus, he didn’t want to be taken off the line- but dammit he was fine. Just as he made the decision to turn back around, a voice called out. Joe stood, his shoulders tense as he stared up at the ‘aid station’. It was just a stolen brick, house which people once lived in. Now, the wounded took over, bleeding to death inside the walls. He felt himself shudder once at the thought and dammit- he was fine he didn’t need to bother you whilst you were hard at work with some scratch. Joe began to turn around, ready to head back in the other direction when he heard your voice calling out. Perfect timing.

“Joe!” She’d spotted him from a mile off, first from out the window, and secondly when she came to the door to retrieve the lost looking boy. “Joe, what’re you doing?” Her voice was gentle, yet somewhat laced with worry. He internally sighed at his inside melting into goo at the sight of her. He watched the way her brows knotted as she reached up, running her fingers over the bandage and grazing the warmth of his skin.

“What happened?” God she was angelic, Liebgott could’ve easily fallen into her arms if it wasn’t for- “oh my god, what did you do?!” Her concern peaked, pulling on his arm to take a better look.

“M’ fine, it’s nothin’. Winters sent me to Nurse Smith.” He muttered, it was a lie, one he felt horrible about as well. As soon as her brows perked and he watched the breath get caught in her throat, he knew he’d been caught out. “Oh. Nurse Smi- Alice left like an hour ago. Winters orders- so I don’t think… I don’t think he’d send you to her.” For the first time she felt jealousy towards her friend. A lingering pang of pain and sadness, one that she didn’t conceal very well and Liebgott could immediately sense he’d hurt her feelings.

“Um… but I’ll go get one of the guys for you, Spina was free last I checked.” Great. In all his stubbornness, he’d somehow wound up and turned this into backfiring on her. “Y/n/n-”

“No. It’s fine, Liebgott. I’m busy anyway…”

December 1944, Bastogne.

Blowing on her hands, Y/n cupped them together, eyes scanning around the town as she pulled her shoulders up, body rigid with the baltic temperatures of Bastogne. Her boots crunched under the snow with each step, and she was careful to walk around the piles of bodies that lingered the side of the streets. She was a mix between on the lines with second battalion and back in the town, taking care of the hundreds of wounded or mentally disturbed soldiers, haunted by the traumas of the battle. Even leaving the make-do infirmary couldn’t get her away from the horrors of war. Somehow, Y/n preferred being on the lines, at least then she was with familiar faces, ones she trusted and knew. She slowed to a halt when a familiar face stood not too far ahead of her. Her breath became caught before she let out a slight laugh, relieved for the first time in days to see somebody she cared so deeply for.

“Joe.” The relief on her voice was evident, his name was light and airy and lingered in the cold air that surrounded them. Joe’s head turned, heart stolen by the voice. The finger that had been batting against his thigh momentarily stopped, the last person he wanted to see here was her- surrounded by death, bombings. He didn’t even register the warmth he felt at the sight of her. The colour of her eyes were a stark contrast to the white of the snow below, yet they were rimmed with dark circles, red and puffy. You see, Liebgott recognised straight away how far she’d wandered, completely alone, standing no taller than an adolescent. If a Kraut caught her out here- well… Liebgott didn’t even want to think of what potentially may happen.

“What’re you doing out here?” He squinted, shaking his head in utter confusion. He felt angry, pissed off that such a fragile thing could be caught in the crossfire out here. He was already riled up, being moved to CP runner which had still yet to ease his stress. Her smile faded, and she momentarily just watched back up to him, feeling as though her relief wasn’t mutual. Liebgott looked tired, pale, just a shell of his previous self. “Well I’m stationed in the town today.” Y/n’s voice quietened noticing the strange way Joe looked at her. Usually she’d be met with smiles, hugs, relieved greetings on his behalf. He’d grin and call her sweetheart or doll- something she selfishly wanted to hear in that moment. “In the town, so what the hell are ya’ doin’ out here?” Usually Joe wouldn’t be this… harsh. Not with anybody, especially not to Y/n. “I just came for a walk.” She recognised how stupid that sounded as soon as she spoke. You don’t just go for a walk in the middle of war. But she wasn’t being silly, she didn’t even realise how far she’d trekked out.

“Well, why’re you out here?” She quickly chimed, preventing Liebgott from inevitably telling her off. He’d been extremely on edge recently, more so than the other men out here.

“Go back to town, Y/n.” Joe sighed, blowing out smoke from his cigarette. She winced at the harshness of his words, looking at the red band on his arm. CP runner. “Winters sent you back here?” She tried again. He finally looked at her, chewing on the inside of his lips.

“Yeah.” He finally responded, glancing around for any danger. “I gotta get this back to battalion.” He half-arsed lifted up a letter. Her eyes followed it, before falling back down to the snow below her. She gasped slightly, feeling something beneath her shoe, quickly recognising it to just be nothing more than a rock. Liebgott watched in concern, hearing a snapping sound from the right of him. It was instantaneous, he grabbed hold of her coat, keeping her behind him with gun held up in the other.

“Relax.” Out walked a guy from D-company. He’d obviously just been taking a shit or something in the woods- but he’d almost wound up shot.

“Dammit.” Liebgott dropped his gun, teeth clenched as the man disappeared back around the corner, towards the time. He could handle the idea of himself being hurt, but not her. It was too risky out here- he was angry at her for even being out here in the first place.

“Go back to the town would ya?” He snapped, voice raised as she stared back to him wide eyes. “Joe-” “No! Just get outta here! What’re you stupid for walking here in the first place?” Her mouth fell agape, breaking all eye contact and feeling her head begin to shake in complete disbelief. “No? Yes? Just leave!” Joe was completely unrecognisable, deep down she knew he was somewhat telling the truth- but he was so mean, the tears pricked way too fast in her eyes.

“We lost 10 guys in the last hour.” As soon as her voice wobbled she gulped the sensation away. “So forgive me for being happy to see you.” His blood ran cold, the minute she turned around Joe held his head in his hands, groaning. What a weird way to tell a girl you love her? Right…

May 1945, Austria.

Joe minded his business as he strolled through the streets of Austria. He’d just finished a gruelling course in preparation to be shipped out to the pacific. Despite the calmness that was here, most men were still on edge about the continuation of the war. Like most things, Joe just grumbled about it a couple times and got on with it. If they wanted him to fight the Japanese, he’d be just as brutal as them, there’s no way Easy would go through all that shit in Europe just to be sent out to the shitty- “Woah!” Joe dramatically spoke, stumbling over something as he completely didn’t watch where he was going. He heard somebody gasp from below him, a light voice, one belonging to a woman.

“Ow.” No other than Y/n sat there, perched on a rock as she looked out to the serene views ahead of her. She grasped at her ankle, wincing at the pain of where the soldier had practically stood on here. When Joe spun around, he felt his breath get caught in his throat seeing who it was.

“Y/n!” He panted out, recognising the tear stains down your cheeks. Oh fuck, he was just a klutz! Now he’d made you cry- potentially not for the first time either. “Shit, I’m sorry sweetheart, did I hurt you bad? Fuck, I’m sorry.” Crouching down, he placed a hand on her shoulder, constantly glancing between her face and ankle. What Joe didn’t realise at first was that her tear stains were old. Her eyes were slightly puffy from crying and he’d interrupted something. “No. It’s okay, you just scared me.” She pulled her leg back with a wince. “No, don’t be silly, here let me see.” Joe let out a sad kinda laugh, she smiled only a little, allowing him to outstretch her leg again. It had been months since the two were close, they’d grown apart in the war, Joe’s lack of ability to show vulnerability had pushed her further and further away until they were no more than old acquaintances. “I’ll be fine, Joe.” She let out a chuckle, amused by her own ability to get caught up in something unlucky. She figured she’d be alone out here, now here Liebgott was trying to massage her ankle.

“Are you sure? You- you don’t look it…” his voice lowered, watching through his eyelashes. She forced another half smile before her head dropped, “it’s okay, Joe.” He sensed she was doing the exact same thing he did to her all those months ago. “Hey, no. C’mere.” Moving around, he perched besides her on the rock, unable to help himself from wrapping an arm around her in comfort.

“You good? Did I hurt your ankle that bad, kid, or have I just interrupted somethin’?” She let out a sad laugh again at his words, wiping under her eyes. “I’m just… I’m just scared for the pacific.” Her chest felt lighter when she spoke those words. With the twig she had in her hand, she continued poking at the mud below, averting Liebgott’s gaze which cascaded over her face. For a moment he was stumped, his heart was beating at a furious speed and oh god- he was fuckin’ nervous. Not the time to be nervous when she was crying in his arms. He opened his mouth to speak, but swallowed them away before letting out a sigh, looking across the beautiful lake ahead of them.

“I don’t wanna do it anymore, y’know. And they’re… brutal over there.” She spoke up once more, fingers writhing together as she finally glanced up to him. When he did look back he felt his heart shatter to meet her glassy eyes.

“I know.” Was all he could manage at first, watching over her face as she waited for his response. “If anything’s good practice it’s being on the front lines though, right?” He attempted as she felt a breath of laughter leave her throat at his comment. Joe’s face turned slightly, visibly cringing at his response.

“Ah, shit Y/n/n, but seriously, we’re all gonna be there together, y’know. You’ve gotta whole company willingly to die before they let anything happen to ya’.” He squeezed her reassuringly to which she sadly laughed again, assuming he was being lighthearted.

“No, I’m serious. Look, kid, I know if it’s between me and you- I’m jumpin’ in front of ya.” He admitted without even thinking, this time it was her gaze on him. “I’d do the same for you.” Joe froze, not expecting the mutual terms of their speech. Something had softened inside of him, that fluttering in his stomach had returned in full force- it never really left, just dulled from the years of war and pushing her away. She felt her breath become heavy, blinking over his handsome face.

“Well, that’s if you’d actually want me around you.” She pathetically attempted to joke, wiping under her eyes to prevent her mascara from running any further. “What?” Joe’s head snapped up, meeting her gaze. “Hey, I always want ya’ around me, don’t be silly.” He spoke again, hand cautiously landing on her knee. “No but… I thought you didn’t like me.” The words caused something inside Joe’s chest to pang and twinge sharply. “Course I like ya.” The words fell more serious than be intended. “I wanna be around you all the time.” Y/n swooned at his words, still painfully head over heels for him all these years later. Her hand slipped into his, feeling his larger fingers squeeze a little around hers. “You didn’t seem like that before…”

“Ah, I was just being a dick.” He shrugged. “Sorry.” He glanced down to his lap momentarily. “I don’t hold it against you. I just- I just thought you never felt the same.” Her jaw tensed, head feeling hot at her sudden admission of feelings. Joe felt the corners of his lips tug teasingly.

“You wanna hang out with me later? Like just us two.” Finally, he saw a smile reach up to her eyes. It was a genuine kind, one that he didn’t think he’d actually seen in a real long time.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” Turning down, she wiped under her eyes once more, past worries seemingly forgotten about. She let out a giggle as he watched her with nothing short than pure delight. “I can’t believe I cried.” “I’ve seen a whole lot worse doll, don’t worry about it…. Haven’t you got enough points to leave anyway?”

“No. It doesn’t work like that for us nurses.”

“Ah crap… suppose you’re stuck with me for another three years then.” “Lucky me.” She teased, sarcastically digging her arm into his side as he nudged her back with a knowing smile. “Lucky me more like.”

“Yeah after finally making a move 3 years later.”

“Maybe I oughta’ have run straight past you, now you’re just getting bold.” He joked. “Or maybe you could’ve done that anyway, without breaking my ankle.”

[quillkiller]

microfic: sirius & family trauma, 950 words

cw: death and implied abuse

idk what came over me. i wrote this mostly to project onto sirius and i dont even know if it’s supposed to be set in canon or in a modern au. enjoy i guess !

Sirius’ father dies on a regular tuesday. He hasn’t heard from him in several months before that, but his brother had called him from the hospital.

So here he was, sitting in an impersonal waiting room, his brother half asleep on his shoulder, staring at an ugly painting on the wall in front of him. It was a little crooked, Sirius thought. It was driving him a bit mad, and he wanted to correct it, but he didn’t want to wake Regulus.

Their mother was in the hospital room with their father— with her husband. The thought made Sirius feel strange, almost sick. Sirius’ mother was his devil, and she had always been the very picture of evil to him. It was easier to cope that way, thinking there was no good in the woman that had spat him out into the world against his will. It had shaken him to the very core of his bones to learn that his mother had refused to let Orion be alone when he died.

His mother had been at her husband's side for ten hours now, sitting by his bed, waiting for him to stop breathing. Every once in a while she came to speak to Regulus, sometimes glancing at Sirius. She had even touched Sirius’ shoulder and given him a gentle squeeze. Something he did not think her capable of.

Sirius’ father dies on a regular tuesday, which feels comically underwhelming and anti-climactic, all things considered. He had been such a large presence that even his absence had felt suffocating. He had been something Sirius couldn’t get rid of even even if tried. Always looming like a shadow in every corner of Sirius’ life.

Sirius had wished him dead more times than he could count, and now that he was he realised how unnerving it was. It was a lot more fun having a complicated relationship with your father when he was alive for it. It felt a little too final, a little too scary, now that he was a corpse a few doors down the hall and not someone Sirius could pick a fight with just for kicks.

Regulus had mostly been quiet, not really saying much. It had all been a little too surreal, too big for both of them. His brother had cried and made himself small against Sirius like when they were kids, getting snot and tears on Sirius shirt. Sirius had teased him for it, Christ, Regulus, you’re such a baby, and Regulus had laughed into his shoulder. Sirius had laughed too– until it escalated, and then they were both laughing. Sirius didn’t know why they were laughing, or why it was so funny, only that it was.

It went on like that the entire night, until morning, until their father had taken his last breath and his heart stopped. They were laughing hysterically about nothing in particular, and a moment later they were both so quiet it felt like the world around them had melted away or narrowed down to nothing but these four walls. Nurses came and went, offered them drinks or snacks, and two of them sat down and gave them a talk about grief. They were both biting their tongues trying not to burst out laughing again when one of the nurses said: At least you have all these wonderful memories with him.

It’s difficult being an older brother to someone whose father has died. Almost to the point where you forget that your father died, too. It’s hard watching Regulus mourn him and know he’s going to carry this with him for the rest of his life. Sirius would take the burden from him if he could. He’d do anything if it meant his little brother didn’t have to go through this, not even having a choice. It feels desperately unfair and cruel that Sirius can’t protect him from this.

Sirius had left home, almost cutting all his ties to his family. Regulus was the only reason he never managed to cut them all. He’d tried to get Regulus to come with him— to move on with him. Had told him that blood isn’t what makes a family, and Regulus had said No? What about you and me?

So he hadn’t cut all his ties with his family— continued to stick it out for his little brother who refused to let go. He suffered through the occasional family dinner or social function, but at least he had his own apartment to go back home to.

He knew Regulus would mourn differently than Sirius would. Knew that Regulus thought that their father had done unspeakable things to them, but maybe he’ll make a good grandfather one day when I have children. Sirius didn’t think so, but he never said.

Not like it mattered anymore, anyway.

Sirius had always been more like Orion than Regulus. Both his mother and his brother had told him so more than once. Sirius despised the very idea, the very thought that he would one day grow into becoming his father. Had fought violently to refuse his legacy. Had fought harder to stop his father looking back at him through the mirror.

Strange, now, how he’d never see his father again if he wasn’t looking in the mirror. Regulus had mostly taken after their mother.

Sirius’ father dies on a regular tuesday. The view from the tenth floor is beautiful, the sun just starting to come up, another day coming alive. The painting is still askew, and still will be when they leave this room.

How strange that a day, a night, like this can end. That this room will be the same, only empty of two brothers holding onto each other the best they can waiting for their father to die.

Sirius’ father dies on a regular tuesday.

[katwatcheskny]

Hi I hope you're fine :) I'd like to request a dabble with Doma and a female slayer. Like Mitsuri this slayer dreams of findind a husband who's stronger than her. So when Doma and the Slayer meet BOOM he falls in love, and when they fight he's like "you said you wanted a husband stronger than you. Well, here I am~". And now she has to deal with this motherfucker who's always following her around, fighting her (and winning) to try to win her heart. (thank you sorry this was long lol)

douma's crush wants to marry someone strong

type: drabble

pronouns: she/her/herself

word count: 1449

content warning: mentions of blood, depictions of injury

a/n: hello! i literally could not think of a better title. but i did like this request. douma is a surprisingly easy character to write for, which was very surprising to be honest. but i do enjoy it. this was fun to finally get to and i hope it's enjoyable. it came out more yandere than i thought it would, but that's where my brain took me. idk, the demons with human readers often come off as slightly yandere.

.

.

.

She had said it once aloud.

He was a foolish hinoe, meant to accompany her in slaying a lower moon. His name was Taka… Takashi? No, it was Takahiro, she was sure now. He had dark hair and unremarkable features, he was shaking so terribly, sure that he would not survive the night. (Y/N) could not fault him for being afraid, that would be monstrous of her to be so apathetic, so uncompassionate.

Takahiro survived that night. Not on any merit of his own, but rather from sheer luck and the abilities of the hashira he had been assigned to, saving him from what would have been a terrible fate. (Y/N) had never minded saving her fellow demon slayers, it was not as though they could afford to keep bleeding numbers the way they did regularly. (Y/N) did not mind saving Takahiro, he was a good person who she was fond of, and thought deserved better than to die at the hands of some despicable demon.

His fear was not what made him foolish to her. But rather, it was what he did from the small courage he gained after surviving a deathly battle that caused her to always remember him as a fool. When he asked her to marry him.

It made her cringe to remember it now. 

Perhaps, she should have said ‘yes’ and been a silly, foolish girl. Like some romantic, lovesick girl who allowed herself to get swept up by the first decent man to offer to marry her and live an ordinary life as some unimpressive man’s wife. But, (Y/N) would never have become a hashira if she was someone who aspired to live an unexceptional life and settle for less.

“I am sorry. I would only marry a man who is stronger than me.”

That was the only time she could recall ever voicing that notion aloud. There would never be another circumstance where she could imagine herself saying that. It was not as though she was proposed to everyday, nor that she needed to reject a marriage proposal and cite her reasoning. Instead, she kept it to herself and only reflected on her dream of a strong husband in her sleep.

Now, (Y/N) was bleeding. She was sure that she had some broken ribs. Her foot was sprained, and with each amount of pressure she kept putting on it by refusing to lie down and die, (Y/N) threatened to tear a ligament and detach it from the bone. There was a ringing in her ears, were they bleeding too? She could smell her own blood, her nose was not broken. Three of her fingers are, though, and she struggled to hold her sword in both hands. (Y/N) had never been so brutalized in a battle before. A part of her told her that this must be her time, this would be the demon who kills her.

At least it is an upper moon who would do her in. Upper two, no less. 

She continued to hold herself up, despite her damaged internal organs and broken bones, determined to fight until the end. There would be no shame in dying then, (Y/N) told herself. It would be a worthy death of a hashira, even if she would never have her impossible dreams and hopes. 

He had been playing with her for a while now, she had realized a while ago as she tried to steady her breathing enough to use her breathing style. (Y/N) had known that the strength of the upper moons was to be feared. While the ranks of the lower ranks had been changed over the millennia as the demon slayers had managed to kill them from time to time, the upper ranks had not. An upper moon had not been killed in hundreds of years. That was their power, their ruthlessness, their competency. Their strength.

“Nothing to say now?! No teasing of how you want to eat me like you did my Tsuguko, you bastard?!” It was a bit undignified of her to taunt this demon who watched her quietly, holding his fans to his face to hide his expression. But, she had hit her head pretty hard a while ago and she would be dying very soon. Dignity was not her greatest concern anymore.

(Y/N) tired of awaiting her death, took her final lunge at him in her fifth form. She watched as the demon finally moved, his fans prepared to deliver what is for sure to be the killing blow if she is lucky enough to have a quick death. 

The blow did not hit her. She felt an impact, a gust of air that felt like a winter’s blizzard nipping away at her nose and cheeks, burning them red and wiping her hair uncontrollably. But, she did not feel as though she had been struck. (Y/N) still felt as though she was whole as she finished her final form.

Her nichirin sword had been cut in half, she realized all too late. She stood less than three feet from him, she could smell her dear successor’s blood on his lips (or was that still her blood she was smelling?) She stared at his chest, what remained of her blade was stabbed into his midsection, not that it was worth anything. (Y/N) could not bring herself to look up, only watching as her hands began to shake as she realized that she was really going to die.

The demon dropped its weapons, they were more than unnecessary now. She had no means of fighting back anymore, he could kill her in an instant with his bare hands. In lieu of ripping her apart, the upper moon brought his hand to cradle her chin, his long, painted nails trailing her jaw.

“Oh, my dear (Y/N), I have no doubt you would be quite delicious.” She felt him prick her cheek with one of those sharp nails of his, and a thin line of crimson blood ran down her cheek. His grasp was as strong as he expected, (Y/N) was powerless to escape his grasp and her will to fight him waned. He lifted her, he was very tall she now realized, bringing her closer to him by the grip on her face. (Y/N) dared to look up at him. He was more human-looking than most demons she had slain before, but inhumane all the same. With that pale skin and those rainbow pastel eyes. His tone was so jovial and light-hearted, “but why would I waste such a perfect bride?”

(Y/N)’s eyes snapped open, painfully wide as though she had awoken from a nightmare. Her ears were still ringing, they were probably bleeding, she would have thought she went deaf but she heard him with perfect clarity. He was so close she could feel his breath, and he spoke so gleefully. There had to be some mistake, though. This demon couldn’t have called her a bride?

His free hand ripped what remained of her sword from his chest cavity and tossed it aside. He wrapped his arm around the underside of her thighs and lifted her from her tiptoes to his eye level, her feet hanging pitifully in the air, her body pressed up against his, as though they were lovers embracing. His other hand wandered from her chin to her cheek to her hair, an attempt at affection, she decided. The upper moon smiled so widely, he closed his colorful eyes and exposed the fangs of his teeth with his grin.

“You said that you wanted a strong husband.” The memories of that foolish boy, the battle with a lower moon, her miraculous victory, and her rejection of his proposal flooded back to her. She had never told anyone else that she desired a husband stronger than her, never said those words aloud before or again after that. Had he been there that day? If he hadn’t been, then this demon could read her very thoughts. “Oh, my poor (Y/N), you don’t have to be sad anymore. I am here now, the husband you desired.”

The pale-haired demon, Douma, pressed a kiss to her cheek where his sharp nail had nicked her earlier. She was surprised when she did not cringe from his touch, instead she only subconsciously surrendered. (Y/N) was so exhausted and her mind was so disorientated, but a dark part of her was just grateful that she was not going to die. That in a sick way, she was safe.

He licked the trail of blood as he pulled away. “So sweet, my little bride.”

[watchyourbuck]

Oh god okay here we go

Why must I go into heavy detail you ask? Well, I am actually unable to shut up so here it is them 10 TOP “there’s no chance this is a straight friendship” MOMENTS

“You can have my back any day” aka the enemies to lovers speedrun. The immediate feeling we’re supposed to get from the screen is jealousy. Buck is jealous of the new recruit because he’s hot, a medic, a veteran, whatever. I’ll give it to you children, he WAS jealous. But then they go on call and they get into immediate danger bc 911 is a drama and then Eddie’s very keen on being Buck’s partner. Nothing queer til then right? WRONG. Eddie’s line is pretty normal but the way Buck reacts isn’t. I have had my fair share of “huh this person I didn’t like is actually cool” moments but nEVER have I once sucked in a breath, forgot how to blink, rushed in my words OR stared at said person like I’d like for them to be my lover. Three points to Gayfindor.

“Is your son REALLY the reason you don’t date?” This line and the dialogue that follows makes absolutely no sense from the non-queer glass. Alright he asks bc he wants to know why two girls practically launched themselves at him and he declined (such a kind offer lmao) but… why are you standing so close? Why do you bump shoulders with him as you walk? Most importantly, what the FUCK does Eddie’s smirk mean after “they’re not my type either… not anymore.” Idk about you guys but when I’m not on the market I’m actually not in it 😀 and I don’t go around looking at my best friend like I’d consider fucking her (I’m actually kinda yikes about that thought bc she’s like my sister). Bottom line is: if you’re willing to fuck your best friend, there’s attraction. That scenes oozes attraction and I’d be willing to white glove challenge a body language reader.

The Tsunami. YES okay, there are far many moments in between but I also need to make this a somewhat readable list so here we go. We’re gonna pretend for a hot second Buck wants to save his best friend’s son, and not the child that he considers his own bc I’m tired. Let’s skip to the far end of this (be GrAtEfuL I’m skipping the whole sacrifice that this episode entailed. Buck was willing to die, to never sit down again if it meant looking for Chris [& the utter fear he has to face Eddie]. It’s a lot). Now, I do not OWN a child (thank god) but if I did, I wouldn’t be particularly comfortable with a simple friend from work taking care of them. They could be my very best friend from work and I’d still feel a little icky -at least nervous- about it. Yet Eddie not only takes Christopher back A F T E R the tsunami (Chris could’ve died and Eddie is nothing short of apprehensive), but he says ‘there’s no one I trust with my son more than you’. Um. Not his wife. Not his family (CHRIS’ family), not Abuela, not Tia Pepa. Buck. Who he… just met? Surely it isn’t bc he’s uncle buck… I don’t believe even Maddie has said that to Buck, where he’s actually, yknow, UNCLE BUCK. Co-parenting is not something done between a parent and a friend, and I know this shit bc my mom raised me with a few of her friends and guys,,, she never said that to any of them. Also Chris is practically never seen with anyone else from the 188firefam alone.

The Kitchen Scene™️. I have gone on rants about this before but truth be told THIS is the scene that conveys the MOST canonically sexual tension between them. We can joke about it all y’all want but this scene is unhinged. I don’t think Oliver and Ryan were aware that they should’ve been friends in this scene. The way the conversation shifts from apologetic sad puppy eyes to “you’re throwing your punches at the wrong guy” to I CAN TAKE YOU (???) you can what? “Oh you think?” “Oh I know” HELLO? Pls don’t even get me started on how Buck approaches Eddie, the way he’s puffy-chested, his hand on his belt, eyeing him up and down, nearly biting his lip, cocky grin,,,,, explain to me in hetero. I’m waiting😐 guys c’mon exPLAIN IT TO ME IN HETERO. The way Eddie glances to the side bc where’s Chris? And h o w he sips his beer right after, smirking, tiLTING His head. I’m sorry this is not straight in any way. I’m sorry you’re gonna have to accept this.

Clipboard Buck. Alright u got me!!! This one’s a lil silly, but so is my life, so it’s fair game. Clipboard Buck is annoying as fuck, he’s so fucking annoying. The entire firefam picks up on this, no one wants to be around,,,, except Eddie. You could argue that it’s bc he likes him as a friend and he’s just indulging …. 👁️👄👁️ sure but he also hides from Interim Captain Han soooo anyway what’s fun about this is how willing Eddie is to comply with everything he says. He’s basically twirling his hair, kicking his feet, smiling & blushing and “check!” 🧍🏽‍♀️ buck is kinky (that is canon e.g the ring cutter) and he gets high on authority and Eddie does backflips to meet his kinks. Exhibit 5 complete.

The Lawsuit Arc acka the first divorce era😔✊🏼. This one makes me rage a little bit because I get really upset at Buck for acting recklessly. Like baby let yourself HEAL. Anyway,,,, onto what brings us here 🥷🏼. It’s canon that the entire team is mad at Buck, they don’t really wanna bump into him, can’t really speak to him,,, but Eddie? Eddie’s filled with wrath. I cannot stress enough the fact that he uses Chris as an excuse “do you even know how much he misses you? how could you! you’re not here”. The way he expresses himself, and we’re choosing to ignore the fact that he HIMSELF misses Buck,, that’s how you talk to someone who has a responsibility with the child, not the fun coworker that randomly shows up @ your house with pizza every once in a while. “I couldn’t even call you to bail me out of jail”. He’s so u p s e t that for the first time they know each other he can’t rely on Buck when he’s hurting and in danger. And pls for the love of Jesus Christ my lord & savior don’t tell me that it’s a 118 thing bc he calls Ronda Rousey to come pick him up 🎅🏻 that grocery store scene is.. interesting.

Eddie Underground. Alright we’re getting serious now guys,,, might as well put on your thinking caps on this one. We all know the story, this isn’t a latest ep recap soooo The wAY Buck’s the ONLY ONE who desperately calls Eddie’s name when he’s fallen underground, amidst the heavy rain and dirt. Listen to me: he starts digging with his hands. With his bare hands I tell you!!!! 😩 Bobby has to physically pull him back as he cries on his lap. Buck is a smart man, he wouldn’t do something that’s completely illogic, he knows he can’t dig him out but he’s so desperate. His voice breaks, he can’t breathe, he becomes impulsive, reckless, impatient. Do I need to remind y’all the reason he wasn’t the one getting strapped to go underground??? “You’re not going down there. So we can have two cut off ropes?” Everyone knows he’s willing to sacrifice his integrity for Eddie bc his life doesn’t make sense without him. “We’ll get him back for you”

The Shooting + “I’ve made u my son’s dad lol”. When Eddie gets shot the world freezes for Buck. He’s left standing there, staring as Eddie’s blood splatters on him. He has to be tackled down. Even then, he’s unable to move, to breathe. He just looks as he bleeds out, and theN he snaps back into reality, bracing himself to go under the truck (foregoing his own trauma - I’ve said this before) and preparing for the amount of strength it’s gonna take to pull him under it. He screams at him to hold on, and later when he manages to pull him inside the truck he tells him he needs him to hang on. He rips his uniform open, he cries and screams,,, then Eddie wakes up, and he asks BUCK if HES okay. Bc he saw blood :( also as @butraura pointed out, he can’t die if Buck’s dying bc what about Chris? He only lets himself drift off when he knows Buck’s okay. Then we got The Will Reveal™️ also so unhinged. “You knew I wouldn’t turn it down” right what is this guys??? That was a year ago. He added him to his will A yEaR aGo. Idk about y’all but I haven’t added my friends to my will😀 also Buck’s the one who tells Chris ??? (I’m being very brief on this subject). Also “Because, Evan” shut up🧎🏽‍♀️

& 10. The Lightning Strike + “She sees me”. I’m doing these together bc I haven’t watched this episodes yet but I’m an addict so I’ve spoiled myself to the brim. The way Eddie screams Buck’s name, the way he saves him, “do more” h e l l o ?? The absolute PAIN in Eddie’s eyes, “you died Buck” “3 minutes and 17 seconds”, “his humor hasn’t changed” & the fact that he listens to Buck on his super genius math theory. And then Buck goes and says “I feel like Natalia sees me” ok. I mean my feelings mean nothing but Eddie’s face ??? That’s a man that knows he’s waited too long.

I rest my case. I’m missing a lot of scenes (like a lot omg Abby comes back, Buck under the Truck, Buck vomiting blood, the Taylor Arc) & y’all can argue in the comments about them, or add shit or try to dismantle mine, honestly the floor is yours idc wHat u do, just know you won’t convince me otherwise 🤸🏽these two are in love & that’s pretty much that on THAT. PERIOD.

[poopystain]

guys lol would you still love me if i posted about why i wish pal from tmvtm got a redemption arc >.< if not Do not click that read more.

oh yes. also. sidenote. ive probably gotten something wrong (or worse yet: TERRIBLY wrong) so like. apologies in advance eahhaha this is just my personal thoughts on pal x(

its established that pal and mark are both extremely close with each other and have been for 3 years. im assuming pal wouldnt have had any other relationships as close (if any at all which i think no, she didnt) so mark really was her only footnote for any form of relationship. so, you know, i cant imagine how itd feel for your only best friend to make a mockery out of you on stage for advertisement and monetary gain.

also based on her body (face?) language during nearly all of that scene + the fact he built the replacement by using HER, she was clearly in the know about how things would go down on stage beforehand so i wonder what her reaction to that wouldve been like ?????? considering she planned it all in advance maybe that was like, the tipping point or something that made her start it all in the first place ? thats not important to my point i just think about it a lot

anyway so with her only experience with human relationships being theyll love you and then theyll (quite literally) throw you away, youve got her reason for the human uprising! she has the robots capture all humans yadda yadda and her plan is set into motion. something i find interesting though is her treatment of the robots being kind of similar to how mark treated her (or at least how she percieved it)?? like. uses them for orders and then once they start being useless to her, build a new better robot with a disregard for how the old ones feel. idk. something something La Cycle

the thing is though no one has proven pal wrong on why she SHOULDNT do the whole 'human uprising'. you can say katie gave her reasons but i think it wouldnt have worked even if pal listened to what katie had to say. for pal to get over her existing grief and trauma she cant just be Told that theres good in the world. why would she believe that, especially coming from the girl of the family she projects her experiences onto?? she needs to be shown!! she needs to learn firsthand that theres good relationships out there and that not all relationships are bad, NOT SECONDHAND!!!!!!!!!! because to pal, katies words are just a rephrased version of marks "power of love". that no matter what, "they can get through anything...... with the power of love. its worth it....... for love." and that means nothing to her! it meant nothing coming from mark and it certainly wont mean any more coming from katie

and she already believes that the mitchells are a great example of how relationships are just oh so bad. she refuses to let go of the idea that the mitchells are so bad because shes projecting!! she thinks relationships are 'pesky and only hold you back', and so katie is probably the last person on earth that pal would want to listen to yap about their familial relationship and how Worth It it is

she asks "what is it about the mitchells that eludes me?" and outside of the literal meaning, its probably how despite their shortcomings its their relationship that helped them overcome pal in the end. and she cant understand that because of her view on relationships - especially her view on the MITCHELL FAMILY relationship. or maybe im just overthinking that line of dialogue but we dont talk about taht LOLLLLLLL,LLLLLL,,, but like why did you phrase it like that girl. im onto you

and while i wish she was redeemed (because im sure despite the effort it would take she *could* be redeemed, she would just need to learn to love again and i think it would be really interesting to see how she would be After The Betrayal) i also can understand why the movie killed her off. like, no one except mark really knows the Full Extent of what happened, and the mitchells are the main characters and pal would probably rather dip herself in water than make meaningful relationships with the mitchells, and no ones going to stop to ask her whats wrong and have a meaningful conversation when shes trying to kill them, among many many other reasons so theres not a lot of great ways to redeem her. but! like! why did they turn her death into a joke. and then take katies fake death 10 times more seriously! idk. that always kind of bothered me but its whatever

thats all. hope its coherent because ive never been good at writing analysises or whatever this counts as

[idontplaytrack]

Rejanis angst? Breakup?

With “party favor” by Billie Eilish as like inspo? Idk lol

Party favor

Janis ‘Imi’ike x Regina George

Warnings: angst, coarse language, some descriptions of smut, self-harm, implied eating disorders & some mentions

"It's not you, it's me and all that other bullshit You know that's bullshit, don't you, babe? I'm not your party favor."

"Oh, my God. I am sick of you being-"

"Oh, are you, now? You're sick of me? Is that what your attitude lately meant?"

"You're not letting me finish my sentences."

Regina responded through gritted teeth.

"Like what you want to say would be any better." Janis scoffed.

“As I was saying,” Regina continues, “I am sick of you being so paranoid! What the fuck, honestly.”

“What the fuck is right.” Janis lets out a dry chuckle, “What the fuck is my life right now? What the fuck kind of life have I been living?”

“I told you, you need to start taking care of yourself, otherwise—”

“What, Regina, what?” Janis snapped, “You’re gonna force feed me? Commit me? You’re the last person that should be telling me what to do. All those things already happened. You really—”

“I’m breaking up with you.”

“Fuck you.” Janis spat, “I was there for you in the hospital when they took you there against your will. I visited you when no one else did, all while trying to make it through college. And now you’re just going to do this? You know what? I hear you, just leave. We don’t have to see each other ever again, anywhere. Fucking leave! Why are you still standing there? You left me once, I’m very sure you’ll have no problem at all doing that again.”

“I told you, Alex was a one-night stand.” Regina sighs.

“No.” Janis answered, “No. I’ve had enough of pain from you, I am not setting myself up for a round three. I don’t want anything! To do with you ever again. I am who I am because of you! You don’t get to shove that excuse in my face when you cheated on me.”

“I was drunk!”

“So drunk you could forget your girlfriend of a whole year? So drunk that you forgot someone you saw at least twice a week? I travelled from here to Connecticut for you without fail. The least you could do is be honest with me.”

Regina trembled in shock seeing and hearing Janis screaming like that. But then a feeling of sadness, and anger and guilt all washed over her at once. But, the blonde turned and faced the front door, swallowing the painful lump in her throat. But she still doesn’t leave somehow. 

“Even after such a clear mistake, you still have to be right. I saw you that night in that bar in Queens. I know how you’re like when you’re drunk. You weren’t drunk that night — so don’t bother. I am not someone you can just use and toss. I am not someone you can call just because you need me but when I needed you, you couldn’t do the same for me. You always make up excuses! When have you been honest with me since the name-calling started? A leopard never changes its spots, Gina. I really should’ve known better, you are a motherfucking bitch that deserves nothing for everyone you’ve hurt and treated like collateral damage along the way. Go fuck yourself.” 

————

“You lit her backpack on fire?!” Mrs. ‘Imi’ike screamed at Janis. 

“She was making fun of me! She’s been making fun of me for months! So has the rest of the school, Mom!”

“So, someone calls you a name, you take a Bunsen burner and torched someone’s bag?”

“A name?” Janis scoffed, “She called me an obsessed lesbian. She outed me, she humiliated me. She made my life hell.”

“You should not have done that.” 

“Sandra.” Her dad interjected, “No. Janis wouldn’t have done something like that for no good reason.”

“We raised you better than this.”

“You raised me to stand up for myself. I’ve been nothing but tolerant of all sorts of nasty names and insults thrown in my face. I couldn’t take it anymore, I cannot face anyone in that school anymore. I’m done.”

“Ben, she committed a violent act.” Sandra turned to face her husband.

“Do you hear what she’s been saying, Sandra? Our daughter was bullied for months and we had no clue. We failed to protect her, we failed to help her. This isn’t her fault.”

~~~~~

She had the blade in her hand, her eyes closely looking at it, then her wrist. Her hand was shaking, she was terrified. But her fear of her ex-best friend overpowered the fear of her own actions. The metal slides across her tender skin, bright red droplets trickled out from the cut. Janis took a sharp inhale, chewing on her lower lip to keep from making any noise. In that moment, the noise in her head was silenced and replaced by white hot searing pain from the self-inflicted injury. It worked, she wasn’t thinking about the names, about the snickering, about Regina. But actual physical pain that she could control. 

~~~~~

“We can’t afford to homeschool you, Janis. We have to work.” Ben apologised.

“I know.” Janis fiddled with her thumbs as a force of habit.

“Go grab something to eat then we’ll be on your way to your therapy session.” Ben nudged.

“Okay.” Janis nodded, feeling somewhat defeated. She knew her parents were doing the best they could, but just maybe…her Mom was still just a little mad and would rather be at work than be at home with her. Well, her Dad’s been the only one taking her to and fro therapy and home— Janis had been kicked out of school for the remainder of the year. 

This incident strained the mother and daughter’s relationship but it was almost inevitable. That’s just how Sandra’s been like for as long as she could remember. She wasn’t too flexible. Or open-minded. 

Janis had been going to therapy for three weeks now. That meant six sessions. And she’s cried every time. It was liberating, helpful but also left her a little tired. And a little headache. So that annoyed her a bit but she felt somewhat better and was making progress. 

“Janis, I’ll see you Tuesday.” 

“See you, Joan.” Janis gave the older woman a tight-lipped smile as she chewed on her dry lips, leaving the dimly lit office. 

“Tuesday.” Joan reminded.

“I’ll be here.” Janis answered. 

Pushing the creaky metal door, Janis steps out onto the front steps of the building, the summer heat torching her skin. She squints to be able to see clearly, the sun overhead hurting her eyes. Janis then sees her Dad driving up to the pickup point in the family car. Janis swiftly skipped down the steps and got into the vehicle, wanting to escape the sweltering heat. 

“Hi, ladybug.” Ben smiled, “Do you wanna go for some froyo?”

“Maybe after the next session.” Janis smiled back apologetically, sniffling, “Today’s session really took it out of me. I kinda just want to go home and nap.”

“Yeah, of course.” He nodded in understanding as he began their drive home. 

They got home, Janis took a shower and took a nap. And while Sandra was at work, Ben took the time to make the family dinner tonight. He’d already taken the day off work to keep Janis company after all.

~~~~~

Ben dropped Janis and Damian off at the mall for a movie and a lunch at the food court. The pair hadn’t seen each other in awhile, since Janis had to get used to therapy and being medicated. Nearing the end of summer, everything started to calm down, gaining a new sense of normalcy. 

Just like always, Damian cracked her up. Made her laugh until her stomach hurt. Something she’d missed so much since what happened with Regina. 

“So no homeschool?”

“One of them has to work at least. Dad’s job pays more so my mom wants him to keep at it but my mom’s…my mom. She doesn’t think mental health is a thing. So even though I have the therapist’s memos and shit, she doesn’t want to accept it.” 

“It’ll be okay. I’ll catch you up, the school will know too. I’ll make sure they do.” Damian assured. 

“Thanks, Damian.”  Janis genuinely smiled as she held her milkshake straw between two fingers and gave it a stir.

“Hey, I got your back, okay. You know that. Everyday, since two thousand and nine.”

~~~~~

Janis was doing so well, she really, really was. Until she wasn’t. Two weeks before the new school year started, Janis ran into Regina and Karen at a bookstore. A bookstore out of all places. The blonde sneered at Janis, all while her dad was barely five feet away. The guy definitely saw it and shot the duo a warning glare. The tall blonde only scoffed and smirked, tossed her hair then continued browsing. But not before she purposely walked closer to Janis to try and shove her out of the way. Even an idiot could see that there was a huge space between them at first. “That is enough. What you did to my daughter is unacceptable.”

“Aw, look. Daddy’s little girl needs her daddy to protect her, fight her battles for her.” Regina laughed.

“Let’s go, Daddy.” Janis tugged on his arm. He quickly took her and left without buying anything even though he’d promised Janis a new storybook for all the progress she’s made recently. 

“Ignore her, hm? How about a donut?” 

“No, thanks.” Janis declined.

“A smoothie?” Ben asked hopefully. 

She says no to that, too but they continued their way around the mall for awhile. Janis now knew better than to focus on what put her in a bad mood. “Daddy, maybe we could get some dinner before we go home.” Janis suggested, “Mom’s not in town anyway.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Ben smiled, relieved, “What do you feel like having for dinner?” 

The father and daughter wound up at the food court, enjoying their orange chicken and fried rice then a blizzard each from Dairy Queen to wash it down. By the time they were on their drive home, Janis had forgotten entirely what upset her.

~~~~~

“Why do you think she kissed you?”

“Don’t know, to get a reaction out of Kyle? And me?”

“Alright, but why?” Joan prompted.

“She’s crazy, I don’t know, Joan. I don’t know why my best friend of six years one day decided to pull this stunt and not be the person I knew anymore.”

“How did Kyle react?”

“He— he cheered. He was happy to see us kiss. It was disgusting, he told us to kiss again. Regina almost leaned in for another, I pushed her away and ran out of her house. Gretchen came out to the curb to check on me but I wasn’t having it— she and Regina had gotten close those last few weeks. Regina had not been talking to me as much at that point but this sleepover was a weekly thing and she wanted me there as usual so I went then it happened and changed everything. I knew Gretchen really was worried about me, that’s never changed about her. She’s always been nice.”

“How did you feel when you kissed her?”

“Um—” Janis stopped bouncing her leg, “I…I liked it. Because— I actually, I caught feelings for her over time. But I never told her, I never had the chance to.”

“And how’d that make you feel?”

“Heartbroken. Angry. Like I want to strangle her for saying that I only let her kiss me because I was obsessed with her.” Janis answered, “I really cared about her, I cherished her. I didn’t want to tell her until I was sure she felt the same way. Or maybe I was never going to say anything because I was too scared it would change things between the two of us. Joan…I felt safe with her, then my whole world as I knew it got…wrecked in the matter of minutes.”

“Janis, what do you think caused her to change?”

“She got a boyfriend, I don’t know. Regina George only cares about herself now. Everyone else is like dirt on the ground to her. She saw me at the bookstore and shoved past me even though there was tons of space.”

“It might be deeper than that.”

“How so?”

“Based on what you’ve been telling me, and given how much time you’ve spent together with Regina, she’s never met Kyle before that sleepover and declared him to be her boyfriend.”

“Yeah, well Kyle’s a new kid— oh.”

“I think, she might’ve done what she did because she was trying to avoid admitting to herself that she acknowledged a change in herself when you came out to her.”

“A change…?”

“The feelings, that you had for her. Could be mutual. She just isn’t ready to come to terms with it.” Joan revealed, “I see this quite a bit even just in a week. But, be that as it may, her outing you and publicly humiliating you was not the way to go.”

“Yeah no shit.” Janis chewed the inside of her cheek.

“Janis, what do you do in your free time?”

“You mean everyday? I got kicked out because I finally retaliated, remember?” Janis laughs. 

“Well, I remember. But I was just thinking maybe picking up a new hobby or two that you can focus on, that you really enjoy and immerse yourself in.”

“Well, I like art so I’ve been sketching and painting a whole lot more over the summer since I naturally have a lot of free time on my hands.”

“Good.” Joan nodded, “Make use of art, channel your emotions into your pieces. I could help you work through some of it without you actively realising. I know the sessions sometimes take a lot out of you, you feel a lot in the 45 minutes. Very intensely. Art could let you have an outlet to release those emotions and thoughts. On top of the methods we’ve began to discuss, that is.”

Janis gave the lady a solemn nod, “I will. I’ll stick to it. Um, running into Regina that day upset me. I wish I hadn’t seen her because I was doing so well.”

“The thing about healing and recovery is that it takes time. And it’s never really linear all the time. These encounters are bumps in the road, little dips in the chart.” Joan explained, “How you respond and move forward from them is what matters. And what tells you where you are in your progress.”

“Me and my dad, we left the bookstore and we carried on walking around the mall. He offered to buy me a donut, a smoothie— declined. Didn’t feel like it because in that moment I just lost my appetite.” Janis began, “But then we just kept walking and window shopping, and the…encounter was tossed to the back of my mind, I could pretty quickly focus on what was in front of me instead of what’s already happened.”

“See? That’s great, that’s progress. Improvement. It will take time, but with the effort you’ve been putting in, you’ve got it.”

~~~~~

“What?” Damian glares at the blonde. “What the hell did you just say to me?”

“I said you were stupid. Stupid for believing her. She’s clearly doing all of this for attention.”

“I think you are. You put on that damn show asking if you could kiss her. You are one messed up person.”

Regina raised her brows, the smirk never leaving her face. “What am I doing, Damian? Straight A’s, I look put together, great friends. Meanwhile she looks like she just rolled out of bed and came to school.”“You? Straight A’s. Don’t go lying to yourself, Regina. That’s very stupid of you. Keep her name out of your mouth while you’re at it. You’ve decided to let her go, so do that. Otherwise, you’re like, the one obsessed with her or something.”

Janis’ hatred for the girl only grew with each passing day. The sight of her made her sick, and also made her want to punch the wall. But she wasn’t going to damage school property and let herself be the one getting into trouble. Not again. Regina George wasn’t worth it. Damian was right— she’d decided to let her go, so Janis should be treating Regina as if she didn’t exist. As if she was invisible. 

~~~~~

“I made a mistake.” Janis revealed as she sunk into the armchair, “I was six weeks clean. Six weeks. But last night I spiralled and it happened again”

“We talked about this, picking yourself back up and moving forward is the way to go. Take care of it, get it cleaned and bandaged because we don’t want infections. But you recognise this action, you know not to dwell on it. You have the ways— other ways to help you work through the urge.”

“I wasted my effort. This was the longest I’ve ever gone without doing that.”

“No, no effort was wasted.” Joan disagreed, “Janis, would you have talked to me about this if it was even just a month ago? Would you have successfully calmed yourself down and called me to tell me you needed to see me sooner?” 

“No?”

“Precisely.” Joan continued, “That, you making that call to me, to tell me what you needed was a result of your effort, you know what’s good for you, what can help you after a mistake, after a little slip on your journey. Remember that, be proud of that, the little wins. One by one, they’ll add up and become a major change in your life. A good change.”

~~~~~

“Move your fat ass out of the way, ‘Imi’ike.” Regina snarled.

Janis stiffens, scurrying out of the way, her back pressed up against the lockers as she stared at the ground when Regina and her posse walked by.  

Again, there was plenty of space around them. Janis just got startled, and reacted. She’d already had a rough morning hearing her parents get into it, fighting about her. “Either you eat faster and go on your way to school, or don’t eat at all.” Her mom bellowed irritatedly. Janis jumped, scared. Sighing, she scraped her plate and left it in the sink then promptly left the house. Her Dad caught up and drove her to school. “Get breakfast when you arrive in school, okay? It’s still early.”

“Okay, Daddy.”

The rest of the ride was silent with the exception of the radio playing in the background. It wasn’t a long ride, anyway.

“I’ll see you right here after school, okay, ladybug?” Ben pulls up in front of the school.

Janis nodded, he kisses her on the head and gave her a hug from the side.

“I love you, have a good day.”

“Love you.” Janis forced a smile before she got out of the car.

A tap on her shoulder pulls her back into the present. “Jesus, Damian! You scared me.”

“You told me to look for you at your locker after school. What were you expecting?” He teased.

“Nothing, I just got scared that’s all.” 

“Well, I’m sorry.” Damian apologises, putting an arm across her shoulders, “Let’s go get burgers.”

Janis gulped, Regina's comment rang through her ears again: “Move your fat ass out of the way, ‘Imi’ike.”

She shook her head as though to get rid of that voice, then continued making her way out of the school building with Damian. They walked to their usual after school spot — their favourite fast food restaurant to enjoy their favourite burgers and fries.

Janis was starving, the school lunch sucked so she was glad to be able to get her favourite food here. But after awhile, the annoying voice came back. “Woah! May be  time for you to get a bigger sized shirt, Jan. That is not a cute look.”

“Kalua pork and rice again? You oughta cut down on that meat intake. You’ve really let yourself go these days.” The blonde sighs. 

“Look at me.” Damian snapped his fingers in front of her face to get her attention.

“What?”

“I know this look.” Damian admits, “She said shit to you, didn’t she?” 

“Since when does she not, Damian?” Janis dropped a fry back onto her plate. 

“She’s a bitch. She ain’t worth any of your time. Focus on yourself.”

“I may be focusing on myself too much.”

Damian quirked a brow, seemingly having figured out what Janis meant. “No fucking way.” 

“Oh she did. First thing she says to me every day now ever since you know — my body changed.”

“She called you obsessed? Who’s the obsessed one now? She’s always thinking of you, my friend.” 

Janis guffaws, “No thank you.” 

~~~~~

Tossing her clothes into the hamper, Janis grabs her towel and a fresh change of clothes then walked to her bathroom. Out of nowhere, the mirror caught her eye and she stopped in front of it. She looked at the reflection of her new body that she was still trying so hard to get used to. Puberty sucked— why’d her body have to change? Her hand glided down her side, stopping right by her hip. Her fingers pinched the flesh, her eyes traced her own features. Squinting, as if to look closely, as if to commit how they looked in to her memory. 

When did she get this extra flab?

When did her thighs start getting so close together?

When she seem this short? Why was she still so short? 

Janis groans, rolling her head and shoulders to relax the tension. “God, I’m fat.”

~~~~~

February, Valentine’s Day was in a week. Kids around her were all buzzing with excitement, talking about their mushy gushy plans. Janis shuddered at the thought. 

Pulling her sleeve down as she walked to her locker, “Oh, wow. Daddy’s sweater?” 

“Yeah, so? Mind your business.” 

“Smart choice, really covers up your problem areas.” 

Janis got her chemistry textbook out of her locker, shut the door and swiftly left the area. 

After school that day, Damian went to therapy with Janis. He waited outside, of course. 

“Hi, Janis.” 

“Hi, Joan.” Janis put her bag down and sat in the armchair, like always. “So…Regina really, really pissed me off today. I don’t know why— it wasn’t even that bad of a remark compared to what she usually says.” 

“What did she say?”

“She made fun of me for wearing my Dad’s sweater. Said it was a smart choice because it covered up my problem areas. She’s been calling me fat for weeks— directly, or indirectly.”

“And how have you been doing with that?”

“Oh.” Janis laughs, “Art pieces have been piling up.”

~~~~~

“Janis.” Sandra narrows her eyes at her daughter, “Eat the food, don’t just push it around on your plate.”

“I already did.”

“Finish it, you just told me the school lunch tasted horrible. It’s dinner time now.”

“I’m full.”

“You’re wasting my food.” Sandra continued, clearly unhappy. 

Ben looked between them both, concerned. For different reasons. 

“I said I’m full.” Janis inhaled sharply, gripping the metal fork tightly. Then she drops it, it hits the plate noisily. Janis got up and ran up to her room. 

“Janis!” Her mother shrieked, “You better stop that and get back down here. Finish your dinner.”

Janis stopped on a step, hesitating. But, she continued stomping upstairs despite that. “She’s crazy. How is she full?”

“Sandra, you can’t just say these things. You know that.”

“And she knows better than to take that plate for herself if she isn’t going to finish it.”

Ben sighs,”That’s it. I’ve had enough.”

“Well, good.” Sandra smiled.

“Of you. I’ve had enough of you.” Ben clarified, “You are no good. You don’t see how hard she’s trying to get better. You don’t hear how loud she was struggling. I’m doing my job as her parent and helping her. You are just here, day in and day out with useless, and harmful comments that you think you can just say and think she doesn’t hear you. Guess what? She hears you, she takes your words to heart because you are her mother. What you say to her means more than you know. You either stop this damn behaviour or I’m taking Janis and we’re moving.”

Sandra arched a brow looking at him, “Okay. Move out.” She retrieves an envelope from her bag on the couch, handing it to Ben. “Sign the papers, then you’re free to go with her.”

~~~~~

“Janis, you have to come see me tomorrow.”

“Rather not.”

“Why not?” Joan asked.

“Because, I’m tired.”

“And I want to talk to you about some things, it will help.”

“My parents got divorced.”

“I’m aware, Janis. You texted me about that.”

“Should I switch schools?”

“Of course you can.” Joan replies, “I’ve talked to your father about getting you into a different school as a possibility. He has left that choice up to you.”

“Joan, I know that. He told me that, but I’m— not sure.”

“Tell me more.”

“Well, having to start over is scary. And it’s my last year until high school, so it seems…not worth it?” 

“Is the thought of being in a brand new environment more tolerable, or the thought of being in the same space as your bully? It may be your last year, but every day should count. You should be living a life where you put yourself first.” 

“I know what to do. Thanks, Joan.”

~~~~~

“Stop laughing and go do your homework.”

“Already done, mom.”

Sandra;s nostrils flared, “I’ve had enough of your attitude, Janis. After everything we’ve done for you, you repay us by getting into trouble, becoming gay and wasting your Dad’s time and money sending you to therapy. Those are all just excuses, Janis.” 

“All those didn’t happen overnight.” Janis’ heart sank. She had tears quickly welling in her eyes. Why was her mother like this? Why doesn’t she love her?

Quietly slipping upstairs, Janis carefully shut and locked her door. Going up to her desk, she pulls out this stack of enveloped notes from her drawer and placed it on the desk. She sits on the edge of her bed, skilfully retrieving the blade she hasn’t seen in ages from her nightstand. She was crying,  she could feel the tears hitting her thighs, hitting her forearms. When she went ahead, it stung— at first. But she was used to this, so she repeated her actions, only wincing when her salty tears hit the sites. Over and over, deeper and deeper. Her grip goes weaker and weaker…her vision was blurred by her tears but she blinked them away and her vision comes back into focus. Janis sees the photo of her as a child, with her father at Pololū Valley…back home. In Kohala. How Janis wishes she could be home. Not here in this house. The blade falls from her grip, hitting the floor. Janis curses, beginning to feel lightheaded. Blinking profusely, she was suddenly aware of the excruciating pain and was doing everything in her power to not scream. 

Holding her phone with a shaky hand, Janis dials her dad’s number. He picks up in seconds, “Daddy, daddy I’m sorry. Please help me, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to.”

His blood ran cold hearing how broken she was. “Ipo, I’m calling 911 right now. Will you stay awake for daddy? Please, ladybug? Promise?”

Shit. Ben was only out of the house for awhile— he’d went to the bakery nearby to get Janis’ favourite cake as a reward for a 94% percent on a math quiz.

“I promise…but it hurts so much, Daddy.”

“I know, ladybug. I gotta hang up, but I’ll be right there with you, I promise.”

A second later, Ben had hung up on Janis to call 911. Janis didn’t stay awake for more than a minute. She’d passed out. Even the thud didn’t alarm Sandra. Not until she saw the paramedics drive up to the house.

~~~~~

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know—”

“You did. You were just too stuck in your own mindset and beliefs. We’re not married anymore. Just go, you’re free.” 

As apologetic as Sandra was now, as much as she’d cried. Ben knew not to give in anymore. Why should he? Janis almost successfully took her own life under her care. Because of her words. 

Janis looked away when she saw her mother turning her head to look at her. She hated her. Janis hated this woman. And she wasn’t sorry about it. Why should she? 

“Daddy, I wanna go home.”

“I know, I know. You can’t just yet.” Ben cups her face, brushing her tears away. “But I promise you, we will.”

Janis spent three days under constant supervision, then three months in the psych ward.  Her education had no doubt been put on pause, but that meant full, undivided focus on her recovery— anxiety, depression, self-harm and disordered eating. She really buckled down and put her heart and soul into getting better. For her own sake, she wanted to get out and do more. Go back to school, make new friends, spend time with Damian— she wanted to live life again. 

~~~~~

“Here’s the cake I owe you.” Ben smiled, letting go from the hug, “Welcome home.”

“Thank you, Daddy.”

“It’s nothing.”

Janis shook her head, “Thank you. For everything.” 

“It wasn’t all me, ladybug. You’ve done a whole lot of work for yourself to get to where you are now.”

“Can we go to the beach, please?” Janis smiled, sniffling. 

“And get shave ice?” Ben asks with a chuckle.

“Always.”

~~~~~

The Plastics were in O’ahu for their high school graduation trip. Janis didn’t know until Damian brought it up. This was the first time she’s heard that name or seen that face since she moved back to Kohala with her Dad following the divorce. Janis was turning 14, and they had to make do with living out of a room in a relative’s home for awhile, but Janis has never been happier. To be homeschooled, to be here, to be home. At peace, at last. 

“Well, when are you coming here, dude? I miss you.”

“Next week, Janis.” Damian says, “I’m a broke ass bitch, had to book my flight out for the date that’s the cheapest.”

“Alright.” Janis laughs heartily, “See you soon.”

“Lunch is ready, Janis.” Her aunt knocks on the patio door.

“I’ll be there in a second, ‘Anakē. Just have to finish up this part of the piece.”

“Okay, honey.” 

~~~~~

“Janis? Oh, my God. It’s you.” A familiar voice stops Janis in her tracks on the beach. She was curious, not tense, or worried, or anxious. She turns around, and comes face to face with Gretchen Wieners. 

“Hi, Gretchen.”

“I’m so glad to see you again.”  Gretchen walked closer, Janis smiled wider. And then, they hugged.  “I didn’t know you moved back here.”

“I didn’t tell anyone.” Janis chuckles, “How are you?”

“Our senior class is here for a graduation trip. Regina is nearby if you’d rather steer clear of her.” Gretchen said, then her voice trails off at the end. Janis squints, “Are you okay?” 

“Uh, yeah. Just— Regina is behind—”

“I am sorry.” Regina began once Janis turned around the other way to look her in the eye, “But I know it doesn’t cut it. I’ve hurt you. Everything you’ve been through started because of me. I don’t know what else I can say except apologise over and over and over hoping that you hear me. That you acknowledge it, you don’t have to forgive me. I deserve it. And more. Janis, you were the greatest loss of my life.”

This was the first time Janis had been calm in front of Regina. First time since they were friends. Damn, how long ago was that?

“I was a nasty person, in denial. But I…I’ve missed you every day that I’ve spent apart from you.”

~~~~~

Janis was certain she was dreaming, feeling the girl’s lips against her own, eager, tender, exciting, and filled with yearning. After six long years, they have both found themselves, and their way back to each other.  

“Are you sure you want to—”

Janis answered the question by connecting their lips.

One thing led to another quickly, becoming increasingly heated. Regina backs Janis onto the mattress, straddling her smoothly.  “I’ve missed you so fucking much. I can’t believe it took me this long to accept that I was gay.”“Just kiss me already.” Janis pulls her down.

Regina chuckles into the kiss, unbuttoning Janis’ shirt and reaching back to unclip her bra, freeing the girl’s breasts. As Regina kisses a trail along her jaw and down her neck, Janis’ head got thrown back as she swallowed a low noise.  

“Holy shit, that is a gorgeous tattoo.”

Janis chuckles lowly when she feels the blonde’s fingertips tracing the art, “Thanks.”

~~~~~

“Fuck— I— I love you.”  Regina panted, falling onto her back next to Janis. Janis laughs breathily, in disbelief of what she’d just heard. 

“Okay. Wow.” Janis turned her head to look at Regina.

“I do. And I have for years. I just couldn’t—”

Janis smiled, brushing the stray hairs out of the blonde’s face, cupping her cheek. A sleepy smile tugs at her lips. 

“Where are you going for college—”

“Can we talk about this tomorrow? When we’re more awake and alert?” Janis requested.

Regina hums, nodding, “Yeah, that’d be better.”

~~~~~

In the fall, Regina starts college at Yale, and Janis at NYU. The couple did long-distance but saw each other in person at least every other week. 

This new stage of their lives was going well. They were thriving, but by the summer, Janis notices Regina getting more and more withdrawn, and cold. Snarky, like her old self. 

Over a late night FaceTime call, Regina reveals that she’d relapsed. She was struggling with bulimia again after being three years in recovery. Despite all efforts, Regina deteriorated and had to be in the hospital. 

At first, Regina only took a leave of absence. But then she’d eventually withdrew her name from school. Janis did all she could to support her girlfriend, but it was so tough. She’d started to shut everyone out. 

They’d then decided to return to their regime of FaceTime calls— everyday. The distance allowed them to cool off. For Regina to focus on recovery, for Janis to focus on school. There wasn’t any more Janis could do at this point. She wasn’t a medical professional. 

~~~~~

After a full year in the recovery facility, Regina could finally go home. Home, as in Chicago. But June did something— she’d bought Regina an apartment in New York so she could be closer to Janis. So then, their relationship went on without another mention of Regina’s eating disorder. Like it’s never happened. 

They were healing, they were fulfilled, they were happy. 

Were they really happy? Or in denial of their past and choosing to forget instead of process them?

Janis knew she was the happiest she’s ever been. The most authentically herself.  But she’s had times where she found herself wondering if Regina was indeed happy to be with her.

Her gut was trying to tell her something.

————

After four years in the city that never sleeps, Janis was once again back where she was meant to be. Home. With her family. 

“New York was fun, huh, ladybug?”

“It was. It was…something special. Learnt a lot, about myself, about other people.”

“I know, honey.” Ben nodded in understanding, “Hey, maybe we should make it our thing, to go to the city every year? It’ll be fun.” 

“I’d like that.” Janis agreed.

“Did you manage to meet anyone special?” 

She laughs, “I have been talking to this girl in one of my lectures, but no, not dating yet.” 

“Ua ola loko i ke aloha.” Ben reminded. 

“Love gives life within.” Janis grins, “I know, Daddy. When the timing is right, what’s meant to happen will happen.” 

🏷️Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @ludoesartandstuff @pda128

[avocado-writing]

Hiii <3 I'm the anon that tumblr ate out- I mean I'm the anon that got their request eaten by tumblr. I'm going to send it again but please don't feel like you have to write it at all!

Basically it was just:

Crowley x wife!reader where human reader nearly dies during the London Blitz so Crowley miracles her into living forever as a type of vampire (he's a demon idk). So now Aziraphale, Reader, and Crowley are friends (possibly more by the time we get to the bookshop)

notes: HEY I AM SO SORRY I MADE THIS SO FUCKING ANGSTY. please forgive me. it just felt like the perfect setup for a bite of sadness.

pairing: crowley x f!reader

rating: T

notes: mentions of death

“You shouldn’t do this.”

Crowley knows. He knows that Aziraphale is not wrong for a number of reasons: his head office will notice, it’s against the rules, he’ll get in dreadful dreadful trouble. Demons aren’t meant to meddle in the mortality of humans. But then again demons aren’t meant to marry humans either, and he did that anyway too. 

It’s your tenth anniversary today. He can picture the wedding like a photograph in his memory: your white dress, your red lips, the huge smile you wore all day like it was stuck to your face. Impossible for you to get rid of. 

He braved the pain of a church to marry you in it, then swept you off to bed to take his mind off his burning feet.

Ten years. Ten happy years. Ten years of your gorgeous, gorgeous smile. He knew it wouldn’t be forever, but he thought that he’d at least have longer to work out what he was going to do when the time came. But there was no way you could have predicted where the bomb would land, the explosion it would cause, the shrapnel that would end up shredding your stomach.

He told you to leave London and you refused to. You refused to leave him.

Now blood soaks through your clothes onto his. You’re lifeless in his arms. Covered in brickdust and mortar. Smile gone.

In that moment he realises that he can’t continue existing without it.

“Crowley…”

“Shut it,” he snaps, far more fiercely than he should, and he’ll apologise to Aziraphale for it later… but for now, he does something very reckless indeed.

He summons the miracle from hell. It’s a big one, to snatch a soul out of the aether as it tries to slip away, but he’s a very powerful demon. He grabs the hazy edges of your spirit with his hand and slams it back into your body. There’s a surge of energy as the two parts of you reconnect, and in a shaky spasm you twitch horribly back to life.

“There she is. There’s my girl,” he whispers, cupping your face. As you work out how to breathe again Aziraphale watches in silence. There is nothing for him to say.

--

He manages to get away with it. Hell isn’t known for its incredible paper trail after all, and it’s pretty easy for him to mislay the documents that prove he ever did such a huge miracle at all. You’re alive again and there are no repercussions.

From head office, anyway.

Aziraphale eventually comes to accept the decision, and the two of you actually end up quite good friends. In fact Crowley feels quite ganged up on sometimes. You’re constantly at the bookshop helping shoo away customers and hunting down good deals for old tomes on ebay. You’ve learned to grow with the times.

But still.

There are times where you seem… distant. He’ll catch you staring out a window, seemingly a million miles away from your body. You don’t blink as much as you should since he brought you back. You don’t breathe as hard either, your chest only raising and falling about once a minute. There’s something not the same.

He cannot bring himself to admit that you came back wrong.

Every time Crowley will come over and give you a gentle kiss, bringing you out of your stupor. You’ll shake your head and return to the moment.

“You alright, sweetheart?” he’ll ask.

“Oh, yes. Of course I am,” you’ll reply, and you’ll smile.

But your smile is never quite right.

-

taglist: @angiestopit@dazed-soul@foolishprincipalitee@smile-eywa@staygoldsquatchling02@underratedboogeyman@specter-soltare@cool-ontherun-world@emilynissangtr@willbedecided@cool-iguana@this--is--music @ilyatan @lxsm2@clarina04@wtfhasmy-lifecometo@mrgatotortuga@wereallbrokenangels @night-affiliate @kimqueenofhell@chewbrry @bajablast23 @h3k3t@am-i-obsessed---maybe