#she still does a lot of actual chores around the farm and I think that and riding is how she gets most of her exercise

[annefic]

Do you think Anne is a pilates girlie? I think she'd love it but would hate group fitness classes like Soulcycle (and the hype around them)

I think Anne is a horse girlie who cannot physically make herself sit still for more than five minutes at a stretch

[stardropsaloongossiptrain]

Bachelor/ettes and Farm Chores

Bachelors:

Shane -- I think he's the most likely to do actual farm work, especially if you killed Morris fixed up the community center. He really loves taking care of the chickens, and remembers the ones you got from Marnie's. He also likes the other animals, and will probably spend all day with them. He'll water the crops sometimes, if it's not too hot, but will really just wonder why you don't get more sprinklers.

Alex -- Alex will also help out a lot around the farm, partially as a means of staying fit and partially to help you. He'll haul materials and supplies where you need them, and help keep the animals fed and crows chased off. Will train your pet to do tricks. This is not a farm chore, he trained Dusty.

Sam -- Mr. Sunshine will probably fall back on stuff his mom had him do around the house-- vaccuming, doing the dishes, etc. If you show him a few times how to do something, he'll put it in his routine, but will probably forget every once in a while. Undiagnosed ADHD King!

Harvey -- He has a full time job, so he doesn't have much time to help out on the farm itself. He does keep the house tidy, though, and will do the shopping for anything you don't make yourself. He is an extreme couponer and though he will never admit it misses Joja when it's gone just because of the savings. On days off, he does like to help with production stuff like making pickles or jam, and will help on harvest days if he has the time to do so.

Elliott -- He helps but it's never very structured. His writing schedule takes up a lot of time, but he does like helping with the crops. If he accidentally stays up all night working, he'll go out when the sun starts to rise to water the crops and make sure they're healthy, removing dead leaves and such. Not very helpful with the animals, he doesn't like the smell and is lowkey uncomfortable with so many animals around. Will feed/water the pet, however.

Sebastian -- Just because he's married and doesn't need to save up for Zuzu doesn't mean he stops working. He enjoys his work. He does the least around the farm, I feel. He will take care of the pet, and sometimes offer to feed the animals for you, but will probably just do a little around the house on coffee breaks. It isn't that he's lazy or anything, he just figures you know the farm better than him. Most likely to help when you're crafting stuff, he's good at machines.

Bachelorettes:

Abigail -- She's got the energy and the time, and I think without her dad and mom around she would actually want to help contribute. You aren't going to focus on everything she does wrong or nag her to help, so she actually likes to do it. Most enjoys maintaining the slime hutch if you have one, or knocking down trees for more lumber for you. Introduce her to Marlon, get her a sword, and she'll keep monsters off you while you mine. Just don't mention it to the in laws.

Leah -- When she's not focused on making her next piece, Leah likes helping around the farm. She's there every harvest, but will also keep an eye on kegs/casks/preserves for you and remind you when they're ready to turn over. Will pick an area to do work in so she can sketch it when she's finished.

Penny -- She's still pretty busy tutoring the kids, but she likes taking care of the house. She makes most of the meals and will help reset makers when she gets home in the afternoon. She might keep her own flower garden, if there's space for it.

Maru -- She's not the best at helping with actual chores, but will upgrade things for you to make life a little easier-- better sprinklers, autofeeders, automated makers. If you do really need a hand though, she will be there helping.

Emily -- Another one of those full time job havers. Emily will help out on the farm if you need her to, but she's more likely going to do house chores. Would most likely help turning over makers, if anything. She doesn't want to throw you off schedule, though, particularly if you run a big maximized farm.

Haley -- She barely cleaned the couch cushions living at home, homegirl is not gonna be the type to get her hands dirty on your behalf. The least employed woman here, the most time on her hands, the least helpful. Might eventually contribute if you asked her to, but she doesn't do much willingly. Maybe as she gets older it might change, but she's your wife and not your farmhand.

[sims-inmymouth]

Delilah Five - Ep. Six

Jan 19, 20XX

It’s snowing! The first snowfall since last December! Tamah came back two days ago with the supplies she found (a bunch of lumber and wooden parts. The most unique thing she found was a typewriter, but it's broken and we don’t have any paper. Well, besides my diary, but that’s off limits). She came back with a massive grin, and when we looked outside, the whole farm was covered in snow!

I love snow! Winter’s my favorite season, because Christmas comes around, and everything gets all cozy. I’m already excited for Christmas, and it hasn’t even been a month since Santa came around! The storm was intense that morning, so we stayed in and huddled by my new radio, listening to the forecasts. A big storm was expected to come through, but just some snow showers until then. Hossannah made mushroom soup for lunch, and when that was over, the snow had finally stopped enough to where we could go outside!

We had the most INTENSE snowball fight. Turns out that Tamah knows her stuff! She loves snow just as much as I do, and she’s COMPETITIVE with it. During the snowball fight, she accidentally nailed Hossannah right in the face! She had to go in after that, and we decided to follow to keep her company.

Now, this part is just as unexpected as it was when it actually happened. We were all warming up by the fire, and Theodora stoked up the flames a bit. And then the carpet caught fire. And then Theo's pant leg. Theo was on fire.

That was incredibly hard to watch. She was okay - she extinguished herself - but she was shaken up. She spent a few hours by herself. Eventually, she said she just wanted to forget about it and go out in the snow again. Hossannah comforted her and hugged her. It was awkward, a really long hug, but they seemed to like it.

Closer to dinner time, we all went back in the snow! Hossannah and Theodora made a snowman together! I made a snowlady with an orange slice and three raspberries. I, of course, made snow angels. Tamah fed the cows. Hey, someone's still gotta work.

We were out there all evening. Once Tamah had finished the chores, she hid herself in a little corner and made a massive pile of snowballs. Oh, yes. The war had actually begun. It was Tamah and Theodora on one team, the other Hossannah and I. Tamah and Theodora cheated because they used WATER BALLOONS. I mean seriously, who does that??

We got some good shots in, but it was all in vain. No, this time Tamah nailed ME in the face! I fell right over!

That hurt a lot, but nature exacted revenge on Tamah. She woke up this morning with a cold, probably from running around in the snow for 8, 9 hours? She woke up coughing and shivering, but that didn’t stop her from milking the cows and finishing the rest of her farmhand farmer duties. Even though she plays dirty, I hope she feels better soon. It’s midday now, and now that she’s finished all her work, she’s taking a nap on the couch. Hossannah checked her forehead, and she thinks it's a fever. We checked what we could see of her for bites, and there were none to be seen. At least she's not a zombie.

Oh yea. Zombies. You know, with all the fun yesterday, I didn't really think about Abana. I haven't gotten the chance to plant a fruit tree for her, ya know, with all the snow, but I will as soon as the weather gets warmer. Only a few more months until springtime. We could have something growing by the summer.

I felt a lot better yesterday. I think if I keep myself busy, I won't have to think about the zombies and everything. That should work, right? If I stay moving, what I did can't come back to me. It has to work.

Here's a drawing I did of Tamah smacking me in the face with a snowball. Theodora caught me drawing it, and she was a little bit pissed.

Yours,

Ruth Givens

[unproduciblesmackdown]

meanwhile, some quotes about the material:

The "musical within a musical" is about a ramshackle theater troupe haphazardly putting on a show destined for Broadway in exchange for doing chores around the farm. People fall in and out of love throughout the process, all while the city folk comically struggle with the country life. Emmy-winning writer Cheri Steinkellner was given one mandate, however: "No tractor," she laughed on the phone just weeks before the show was set to begin previews. "They were adamant about that. And there's a tractor in the movie. There's a tractor in almost every scene. It's in many ways about a tractor. But I was told absolutely no tractor." [...] "We're all working on this like we're on an actual summer stock schedule. Art imitates life imitates art. It's just go, go, go. And I couldn't be prouder of our cast, and our Jane and Joe," Steinkellner, who is also a Golden Globe winner, said. Her writing partner also happens to be her husband Bill. "Our 'Summer Stock' is more 'inspired by' than adaptation. There are four songs included from the original film that you can't not do. But the new songs are the best of the old songs. The secret sauce was the great American Songbook." She said "It Had To Be You" is one of the classics audiences can expect.  

[source: ‘High School Musical’s’ Corbin Bleu makes his Goodspeed debut in ‘Summer Stock’]

So, how different is the musical Summer Stock from the movie? It feels like a whole new animal, even though we’ve borrowed some elements from the movie. It is still, first and foremost, a love letter to the theater; it’s about this group of players who come to a farm to put on a show. So many numbers are how they get into farming through performance! We also still focus on how Joe and his partner Phil [played by Gilbert L. Bailey II] fight to get the show on its feet, and how Joe helps his eventual love interest Jane [played by Danielle Wade] find her inner performer. But a lot has changed from the film, including some of the relationships. We have a brilliant new writer, Cheri Steinkellner, who has dropped in a lot of nods to why we love musical theater. We have Veanne Cox as Orville’s mother, who is the new “villain” of the piece. And we’ve added a lot of music, such as “It Had to Be You” and “It’s Only a Paper Moon,” and we’ve switched around who’s singing some of the film’s songs, such as “Dig, Dig, Dig” and “Happy Harvest.” But the most important thing is that while we’re still in the late 1940s, there are two Black actors playing the male leads – me and Gilbert Bailey as Phil – and it is definitely not color-blind casting; it’s color-conscious. That means we’re dealing with an interracial love affair, for instance. The racial element is an additional driving force, which I think is necessary, but the main story isn’t about the struggle for racial equality. In the end, it’s still a feel-good MGM-like affair. You’ve previously stepped into the figurative shoes of Gene Kelly, who originated the role of Joe in the movie, as well as Fred Astaire. How does that feel? I am always aware these golden age icons from MGM have such a specific style and that they make what they do look easy. Of course, I want to bring that to Joe. But in the tap dance sequence, for instance, we also have a bit of Gregory Hines, even though I’m no Gregory Hines. And at the end of the day, it’s me on stage, and I work hardest on finding my own characterization of these roles. This is your first time working with Donna Feore, who is one of Canada’s leading directors and choreographers. Tell me about your experience with her? Donna is wonderful to work with, both as director and choreographer. I think the best thing about her handling both roles is we don’t have to get everyone on the same page, because she is the same page. She’s also really hands-on with the music; she fought to have a drummer in the room during rehearsals so we could find those beats while we created the choreography, not just insert them later. As she directs, she considers the movement of every scene, but also the story that we’re telling through that movement! It’s not movement for movement’s sake, and I appreciate that! Goodspeed isn’t the easiest place to do a dance-oriented show, is it? Yes, we’re dealing with the confines of a very small stage, it’s like dancing on a Chiclet. I am so impressed how vibrantly our cast can move on this stage. We’re on top of each other!  I think we’d look great on a bigger stage, which is just one reason why everyone is focused on moving this show to New York.

[source: Interview: Corbin Bleu Talks About the New Musical Summer Stock and the Fourth Season of HSMTMTS]

“Summer Stock” is right in Corbin Bleu’s wheelhouse. “I feel at home on the stage,” he said. An actor, singer and dancer his whole life, Bleu is appearing in the upcoming stage adaptation of the Hollywood musical beginning July 7 at the Goodspeed Opera House. “I established myself in this particular genre, doing shows associated with Gene Kelly or Fred Astaire,” he said. “I am a bit of an old soul. This is what my voice naturally goes to.” The “High School Musical” star is playing Joe Ross, one of a troupe of actors that descends on a small farming town to turn an old barn into a theater. It appears he was born to play the role originated by Kelly on the big screen. “I grew up as a theater kid,” Bleu said. “I grew up watching old MGM movies. I was a theater nerd and a musical theater fan. My dad kept a storage unit of stuff from our childhood, and he found an old school paper from when I was in elementary school where I’m dreaming of performing in musicals.” [...] Of the four shows, “Holiday Inn” is most similar to “Summer Stock,” which was also adapted from a movie . “Holiday Inn” was a fairly close reworking of the film, but “Summer Stock” takes a few more liberties. “It’s not the exact same story,” Bleu said. “When I watch the movie, I think it could definitely use some updates.” Those updates include a multi-racial cast. “Let’s not skirt the obvious,” Bleu said. “I’m a Black guy doing characters traditionally played by white men, doing things Black men weren’t traditionally able to do easily at the time these shows take place.” [...] “Some parts of the book are still in process,” Bleu said. “Cheri is in the room with us at rehearsals. We want this to feel modern, but we don’t want to shoehorn anything in. “I was also part of the workshop we did in New York a month and a half ago,” he added. “I’m loving seeing it and I’m loving being a part of it. We know this genre. It’s a feel-good musical comedy, a big song and dance show.” Though there is a lot that has been rethought when reshaping “Summer Stock” for the 21st-century stage, those who know it as a Gene Kelly movie will have plenty to latch onto. “We are completely paying our homage to Gene,” Bleu said. “I am not Gene, but I do have a natural tendency to lean into that style. Gregory Hines is also a big inspiration. There’s tap dancing in this. There’s a whole Lindy Hop number. There are a lot of very large dance numbers.”

[source: ‘High School Musical’ star Corbin Bleu is rethinking ‘Summer Stock’ at the Goodspeed Opera House]

[victorluvsalice]

We've hit Winter Monday in the Chill Valicer Save with this update, still racing to try and fill up the last shelves in the store so we can actually OPEN Van Liddelton Groceries at some point! Let's start right where we left off, with the gang working on making product and getting through their morning chores on the farm --

-->In fact, we are starting almost exactly where we left off, as right after Alice decided to curl up for a wolf nap on the floor of the barn, Kelly wandered in and started meowing in her ear, waking her up. XD A very annoyed Alice lectured the cat on not doing that, and to my surprise, Kelly not only listened, but actually learned Not To Wake Sims Up! So that was nice, at least. However, as she was already awake, Alice dragged herself over to the bulk processing machine to make some boxes of strawberry and raspberry jam, then used her werewolf super-speed to go have a REAL sleep in her and Victor's bed. A lot more comfortable than the barn floor, that's for sure!

-->While this was going on, Smiler finished off another chatterbot, then got sent out on a different mission -- mainly, they got exiled to the nearby pond to fish on the pier! No, I did not care that it was snowing at the time, Smiler's a vampire and thus immune to temperature. XD My goal there was to load up on fishies because I'd abruptly remembered that there was a product on the bulk processor that I hadn't even TRIED to make before -- namely, cans of processed fishcakes! And of course, for fishcakes, you need fish, and Smiler is the Sim who has the most experiencing fishing, so. . .they basically spent the rest of the morning on that dock, doing their best to stock their inventory with as much fish as possible. And as you can see, they made some impressive catches -- in the end, they ended up with a beautiful tuna, a couple of sturgeons, a couple of common upgrade parts, some perches, a minnow, and no less than FOUR catfish, who apparently REALLY like the chamomile Smiler was using as bait. Not bad at all, huh?

-->Victor, meanwhile, spent a good portion of his morning molding candles in canary yellow and shale gray shades -- which, as you can see, involves a lot of boring standing around. Like, seriously, can we speed this process up a little? *sigh* He did eventually complete both candles and headed over to the greenhouse to tend the plants -- I do have to admit, it is always kind of amusing to see him using that giant weed vacuum to suck the dandelions right out of the garden patches. XD His needs were looking like garbage after the initial tending, though, so -- after realizing he didn't have any Potions of Plentiful Needs in his inventory -- I grabbed him some Moodlet Solver so he could get himself back in tip-top shape and get on that harvest! Can't let the plants remain unpicked, after all!

-->Alice woke up in good time thanks to how great her and Victor's bed is, and quickly rejoined the productivity train -- after cleaning the litter boxes, cleaning herself (with the power of werewolf licking), and feeding Toothy, she was back on the bulk processor making boxes of cheese with the milk I'd preloaded in there! She also made some more bulk bags of sugar for canning purposes, which, hilariously, unlocked the Simple Living Cookbook as a book she could write. I -- I don't think making an industrial-sized sack of fruit-based sugar on a giant yellow bulk food processing machine is QUITE in keeping with the spirit of the Simple Living lot trait, game! Even if it DOES require Alice to have all the necessary ingredients. XD

-->With the crops harvested and the cookbook unlocked (and Smiler still very much on fishing duty), it was time to tend to the animals. Alice cleaned the chicken coop, made sure everyone was fed, and gathered the eggs (four normal nonhatchable ones, yay), while Victor checked up on Moory and gave her a good milking. Alice then hopped back on the bulk processor to make the first box of canned fishcakes from the fish Smiler had caught so far while I dumped a bunch of the wrapped white meat from the chickens she'd "sold," some custard, and some blueberries in her inventory for transport to the store. And got HER a Moodlet Solver as well as her own needs were starting to flag. She then made a bit more cheese and did a quick Somber Howl while Victor cleaned up all the various plates around the place (surprising me when he did so in the greenhouse -- I'd forgotten the sink that's on the decorative "potting bench" I put in there is actually, you know, a legit sink)...

And then, after a brief dance break in the living room, it was time to get Smiler back and send everybody off to the store! Because, as previously stated, we have SHELVES TO FILL, DAMN IT. No fun allowed until that happens!

[cordelianewman]

We are a fierce, powerful breed of human being. It's one of those things where it's just like -- women. You know? If I'm being honest the fact that we can create life makes us pretty much superhero level, we grow actual life and bring it into this world. I've only done it once but still, it really makes you feel powerful, after you're done screaming from the pain. Exactly, those chores are for whoever is happy doing them, but I'm just lucky that my fiancee loves doing those kind of projects. I'm just a lucky, lucky woman. Teenagers are going through a lot of hormone changes and I don't love that for them, I remember it, and wouldn't pay to go back to being a raging hormonal teen, and I like to think I was pretty -- level? Which maybe is just what I thought and someone else thinks different. It's like toddlers they're mini teenagers with big feelings they can't explain out and breaks down into tantrums. I, for one, am trying to teach Rosalyn how to express her feelings and have been since she was old enough to try and communicate but it's an every day process that doesn't always work great, some days are better than others. With her going into pre-school this fall I like to think we've prepared her pretty well but I'll keep working on things with her through the summer. Age gap babies are pretty common so I do know that happens, and I do hope to have one more baby in my lifetime so there'll definitely be an age gap if it does happen. I've been really lucky with Colton, and him introducing her to the whole football team so here's this little three year old toddler walking around with a football team posse. Last thing, I would hope, any good parent would want is to make their older children feel like they're no longer important because there's new little ones in the crew. Luckily Cage came from a big family and he knows how to handle all of those kinds of things. Not that I didn't, I have two older brothers and a younger sister but we have a kind of messed up family dynamic. We'll definitely let her have her oddities as much as we bitch about it, because we love her, it makes her happy, and she's young, she gets bored. There's no doubt eventually the farm will have a ton of animals, I'm already petitioning for a section of mini animals. Mini cows, mini goats, mini horses, and I think people would love that, personally. I could be wrong, but we already have the ducks and a plethora of chicks and chickens. The fireworks are always nice, for those who can handle them. I'm always torn between the beautiful and feeling for those that can't handle them. Now we're gearing up for this Ren Faire that's coming up, and I'll have to admit, I'm a bit nervous because I love dressing up but this is outside of my realm of what I'm used to so I've been scanning pinterest boards for day. What about you? Have any ideas lined up?

Women are fierce, wonderful creatures that can do literally anything they set their mind to. I mean, we literally have the ability to create life. That’s pretty badass in my opinion. At the end of the day, we have to leave some chores for everyone else. I mean, I’m not going to say just men because there are some non-binary and women really love doing the physical things in life like moving heavy things and opening jars of pickles. I’m not going to get in the way of anyone and the things that they love. Everyone is a little different so I’m definitely not going to say everyone but I’ve known enough to think it’s going to be a high percentage, at least of the very small population of the world’s men that I’ve met. I’m pretty sure everyone has all of them in varying amounts. It’s a spectrum not a one or none sort of situation. I don’t think you have to be hateful as a teenager. I mean, some kids rebel but I think most people are just a little cranky at times because their bodies are awkward and they’re trying to figure out what they want to do in life, while experimenting with their first relationship and probably having their hearts broken a few hundred times by people they’re going to judge vigorously for hurting them. Most of the time, they don’t even mean to hurt each other. I think most people just aren’t emotionally intelligent until they’re like 30. I’m past that and still trying to figure it out most days of the week. I say that to say you’ll survive. They’ll survive. We all did somehow. Age gap babies are pretty common these days. I see videos about it on TikTok all the time and most the time they’re the best siblings. Like they want to spoil the kids. You do sometimes end up with the older siblings who are alienated by the younger siblings when they’re adults because they just didn’t grow up together so it’s like they were never really siblings. That makes me sad though. I know it’s a little scary to think of him behind the wheel of a car but he’ll probably be a big help once he has it down. I mean, imagine having an extra back up for picking up his sister or if you need someone to run to the store. I’m sure Cage is a help too but there are never too many extra hands to help. I think you just sort of have to accept that is who she is. I mean, maybe you don’t have to go the whole Goth Baby route but you can occasionally let her have the oddities. Embrace the strange. Weirding people out is all the more reason to do it. Someone should really tell the donkey that so he can step up his game. I don’t see how they would be harmful but I can’t claim to have any expertise. It could be weirdly poisonous. You should probably find out about that if you’re going to make it a farm for obvious reasons. I’m sure I’ll be all about the petting zoo in the years to come. I do happen to love a good mess from time to time. I think that the weather is nice so they’re going to have to make it around and figure it out. I love being able to sit out and watch the fireworks. This year was no exception. I had a few drinks and enjoyed the show until everyone decided to stop with the fireworks and go to bed.

[a-libra-writes]

Hcs on how would Stannis/Sandor/Roose act with their toddle/baby? What if they had to take care of them for the day for one reason or another.

ok anon i know u only requested 3 characters but pls understand i am baby crazy + i wanna write for my favs i dont get to write often so pls take my emotion dump .......... ill put ur requests at the front

Stannis

He's uncomfortable about being left with a baby, but he knows you're exhausted and deserve the free time. So, he dutifully sets out to take care of this baby. Somehow.

Even if his kiddo is easy as can be, only waking up to eat and going right to sleep, Stannis is fretting. He keeps them close to his desk, but it's hard to focus on work when he keeps glancing over, anticipating something. Regardless if the child is crying or looking around or sleeping, he thinks something is off. The baby suddenly opening his eyes and smiling at him gives Stannis some comfort, though.

A toddler is much more effort. Stannis brings in the boy's favorite toys and his plush stag, but the child knows something is different today. He's wholly interested in Stannis, resulting in the stoic man having to carry the kid around while he does his rounds around Dragonstone or King's Landing. Stannis gets a bit flustered when people coo over his son and tease him about getting "stuck" with babysitting. Stannis grunts he's the father, so it's not that unreasonable, and tries to get on with his job.

He talks to his kid like a little adult, seriously explaining the things around the castle, who this person is, what that room is used for. Stannis will never "fawn" or coo over his child. Whenever the tot reaches for something of interest, Stannis brings him over to examine it.

Stannis is the type to know exactly what comforts his kiddo, so he carries that along with him. As soon as the toddler starts fussing because he's tired and overwhelmed, Stannis hands him the oversized black stag and quickly goes back to their room. If the child is displaying signs of being "different" - as in, probably neuroatypical, Stannis picks it up quickly and tries to accommodate him best as he can. This is Westeros, so he only has so much knowledge and resources, but he's more aware and considerate than others.

In the end, he didn't get much done today. When you come back, he reports all the things he and the baby did. He doesn't know why you're looking at him so softly and giving him lots of kisses, but he won't complain about it.

Sandor

Sandor grumbles and rolls his eyes, but he takes the kid. Sandor is pretty awkward with the baby, but at least he's not terrified of "breaking" it. You've already showed him how to care for her, so he knows what to do, he's just prone to fumbling and making a mess. Even if the baby is perfectly well-mannered and sleeps all day, Sandor doesn't want to leave them alone. He ends up staying in the house and doing chores in there so he's not too far off.

A toddler is much easier to care for. Sandor just straps the tot to his back and goes about his chores on your shared farm. When he stops for a break, he lets the kid out and watches them run around and play.

It's .. actually not bad. Sandor still thinks you do a better job, and figures the kid likes you more. He thinks this even as his toddler comes back with bunch of flowers and he lets her stick them in his hair. He answers whatever questions and babbling she has with his usual sass and... colorful language, and gods know she gets away with a lot. By the end of the day, she's got a big ouchie on her leg, a stomach full of berries she foraged and her hair is covered in leaves and twigs. She won't stop happily babbling about the fun day she had with her father, though.

When he brings her into town, everyone is cooing over the cute baby and the big, gruff man she's tied to. Sandor tries to get away from the townspeople, but he so rarely visits without you, and he's a bit of a mysterious, scary figure... made totally unintimidating by the giggling kid he's got strapped to his chest.

... That's if you find them awake! When you get home, Sandor and your kiddo are probably passed out by the hearth. It's adorable. When he wakes up, Sandor grumbles about you leaving him alone with the kid, even as she's passed out on him and he's still cradling her. Yeah okay buddy.

Roose

He's annoyed, because there's clearly a nurse who can take care of the babe, but he also picks his battles with you. If you're sleep deprived, pissed off and in clear need of a break, he'll do it.

Which is to say, Roose simply has the bassinet moved to his office. He keeps the babe close at hand while he catches up on some work and letters. He's definitely not the sort to walk around the Dreadfort with a child in his arms. When the baby needs something, he takes care of it. There's little smiling or warmth here. It's easy if the baby just sleeps most of the time. If it's awake and becomes more distressed at being ignored, Roose begrudgingly holds it while continuing his writing.

For a toddler, he's still not going to cart them around the Dreadfort, nor will he just let them go off and play. So, he does the same thing - A day with dad means Roose sitting at his desk and some toys being strewn about the room for the kiddo to play with.

Naturally, a toddler will get bored from this arrangement. So Roose will allow them up on his knee and will answer whatever silly questions they have. This might be the only time his kid will be in his lap - he definitely won't indulge them when they're older and "should know better".

Yeah, he's not a terribly affectionate father. Though he's interested if the child is clearly intelligent, like if they're trying to talk to him, figure out what he's doing, or they're incredibly absorbed in whatever toy they have. Roose is more willing to indulge their curiosity, especially if this is his heir.

When you're ready to take your child back, you can definitely give Roose a talking to about being so cold. A young one needs love and warmth, but you're talking to a man who had neither when he was growing up. Honestly, he's better at the whole parenting thing when you're around. It's hard for Roose to remain distant and impassive when you're snuggling and praising his heir. He won't ever admit to it, but watching you both gives him a very warm feeling.

Ned

He's more than pleased to take over the childcare for today - Ned knows you need a break, and he's done it before. If your child is still a babe, Ned doesn't want to be away from them for too long. He brings them into his office, refuses visitors for the day and tries to catch up on some paperwork while constantly getting distracted by every coo he hears. When the baby needs something, Ned easily takes care of them and keeps them in his arms for a while longer, even if it makes writing awkward.

He's pleased whenever Robb, Jon or any of the other children come by to peek at the baby. It's doubtful they'll pay attention for that long, but Ned thinks it's important they ought to say hello to their new sibling.

A toddler whose moving around and more active means Ned can can them with him while he's going about his duties. He gladly brings the tot around Winterfell as he speaks to men and visits with a lord or two. He's a bit shy when they comment on how much the child looks like him - or the praise about having a son, and polite comments on having a daughter. Once all that is done with, he can finally show the child around Winterfell and watch their eyes light up as they look at the tall towers and huge walls.

Once the child is (finally) tired, Ned quietly brings them back inside. If the other young ones (Arya/Bran/Rickon etc) he tucks them in together. Help, he's dying from domestic happiness. Ned didn't think he'd have such a family.

Jorah

Jorah is more than happy to take the kiddo off your hands for a day - if he's the father, this is already something he's done several times. If the child isn't his, he's honored that you trust him so much! He promises to protect the baby and take good care of them. You probably aren't thinking about it that seriously, but his heart is in the right place.

He loves holding your kiddo and smiling and talking to them while he (attempts to) get things done. Eventually he just ties the baby to his chest like he's seen some Essosi women do. Jorah is the sort to respond to every babble they have, talking to them but moreso to himself. He wouldn't carry the baby everywhere if it was a fussy or sensitive type, though.

He's probably a little too coddling for a baby - some more affectionate kids might like it, but more stand-offish babies might be bothered by his constant holding. At least Jorah gets the memo and puts them down when they're fussing. When the baby is in their bassinet, he hangs up some pretty charms for good health and long life the Dothraki women made. Anytime he finds a new one, he ties it up.

With all his patience, Jorah is excellent at caring for a toddler. He knows to bring a toy they like and keeps them up on his shoulders while he walks around the markets, showing them the different sights. He tells the child lots of new words, even if they won't remember it all. Maybe something will stick. When your kiddo starts getting sleepy and fussy, Jorah ties them on his back like he did when they were a babe.

He really can't resist buying a toy or soft blanket the kiddo points at... It's just one! It's not like he does this all the time - well, last time was only a week ago. And Jorah was by himself. So it doesn't count.

When you come back, your kiddo is exhausted and fast sleep, but Jorah is beaming. He had a great time and he volunteers himself anytime you need a break from the toddler. If you both are together, he wants lots of snuggles because he's just so full of love. He had a great day and he's so lucky to have you and your child.

Victarion

... You want him to do what?

Even after you've handed him the baby, given him instructions and walked off, Victarion still stands there. Holding it. Looking at it. Even when this is his child too, and even after you've given him direction, he's stumped. You... want him to look after the babe? You actually think he can? ... Isn't there a thrall that can do this job?

He tries to pawn the baby off to Yara, who just laughs in his face and tells him to figure it out. If he's truly hopeless, she might lend a hand, but it's his damn kid. You should've made him look after her a while ago.

Normally a rough man, Victarion holds the baby like she's made of nothing but glass. He doesn't want to admit to himself how scared he is of dropping her or squeezing her too hard. A toddler is somewhat easier as she would actually like getting scooped up - a baby doesn't not appreciate that sudden movement.

Having no idea what's an appropriate activity for a toddler, the Ironborn would just lift the toddler by her collar, put her on his shoulder and go off. He'd train his men and bark orders while your daughter sat on his shoulder, watching everything with interest. Occasionally pulling at his long hair, and then he'd tell her to stop. Like... she's understands what he's saying. At some point he handed her an old knife to distract her. It's shiny. And it's dull. She'll be fine. If she cuts herself, it'll be an important lesson.

When she (weakly) throws it at someone, he finally laughs and gives it back to her. This is the first laugh/smile your little one has gotten from Victarion, so hell yeah she's gonna throw it again.

You're surprised by the good mood Victarion is in when he gives your baby back. And she's giggling, too, and she's in one piece. Well, that's surprising. It isn't until days later when you hear about how he let her have some ale, gave her a small training axe, set her on the bow of a ship to show her the ocean ...

Arianne

Babysitting duty! You apologize to Arianne and tell her she really doesn't have to, but she wants to. By this point she has quite a crush on you, and your kid is adorable, so this is a win-win. She gets your favor and she gets to carry around a cute little tot.

It can't be that hard, right? The babe is always so well-behaved with you. If it's a baby, she might actually be kind of bored... He mostly just sleeps in his bassinet, and sometimes she has to get up to feed him or listen to him babble. ... I mean, she should be grateful, but... You always look so cute cooing over him, maybe he just doesn't like her ...

But when you get back, you're beaming and thanking her, telling her he's so happy. Well, if you say so!

Arianne more engaged with a toddler. She'll gladly take him around Sunspear, showing him the shiny armor of the guards, the beautiful tapestries hanging from the walls, the big lion skin rug in her favorite parlor. She loves how much his eyes brighten and he babbles and points. He's so much like you, she's dying from cuteness.

Admittedly, she panics a bit when he starts scrunching up his face and fussing. She's had experience with young ones, but her mind draws a blank as she tries to soothe him. She remembers that babies can get overwhelmed, so she takes him to a quiet room until he's calm. There, this isn't so hard. But then he starts asking for his mama and getting upset that she's not there...

By the time you return, Arianne is relieved. She had fun, but she's exhausted. And her ears are sore from him yanking on her earrings.

Brynden

It's not like you ask for this favor often, so Brynden is willing to help you out. Especially if you're a widow, he really can't turn you down. He tells you to take your time, he's familiar with children.

And he is! Brynden isn't worried about holding a babe wrong or dealing with a toddler's endless questions. He was basically a second parent to his nieces and nephew when Minisa passed, and he easily reverts back to caretaking.

While most men would grumble about a baby or hold it improperly, Brynden calmly carries her around, takes care of her when she needs something, and goes back to whatever he was doing. He doesn't forget to smile at her and talk to her about this or that. He has such a gentle way of speaking to children.

A toddler is definitely interesting. Brynden will put her on his shoulders and take her to see the horses, the knights training, the people going in and out of the feast hall. He talks to his men as if there isn't a child pulling at his ears. If something gets her attention, Brynden will take the girl there and explain to her what she's looking at. She doesn't understand now, but she will later.

If the children was his own, Brynden might be a little shyer about showing her off to everyone. He'd still walk her around the Eyrie, but when there's less people. He just spent so long going on about how he'd never marry or have kids, and now look at him.

When it's time to pick your little one up, Brynden clearly had a fun day. He's usually busy with guarding the Bloody Gate or the Eyrie, but the old knight will absolutely help you out again if he can.

Yara

Noooooooo. She can't hide her grimace when you hand her the baby. Yara will do the babysitting, because she knows you're exhausted and you deserve it, and she doesn't want to toss the kid off on some thrall... But what does she know about babies? She's made a point to not have any, and avoid caring for them. This kid is lucky he's your's.

She's positive the Drowned God cares little for babes and whether they cry or not, but Yara is thanking him anyway when your baby just sleeps through most of the day. All she's had to do is feed him and change him a few times. She knows he's not always like that, so maybe the little bastard decided to be nice to Aunty Yara. Isn't she lucky?

If he's crying and fussing, well ... Yara will get through it, but when you're back, she hands him back with an exhausted sigh. She is never having children.

A toddler is both easier to manage and a little harder. On one hand, the tot is always running off and wanting to mess with everything. Yara talks to him like a person, not bothering with the babytalk, because she knows he actually listens. When he tries to pick up something he shouldn't have, she tries to replace it with a toy or ... a cool looking stick. A smooth rock. Anything.

He can be pretty funny, though. When she's carrying him around and people try to give her shit, she just points at them and your son launches his rock right at them. She gives him an approving kiss on the forehead and hands him more. When he repeats something he heard her sailors say, he says it with such enthusiasm she can't help but laugh. (At least she's not giving him weapons or alcohol, Victarion)

When she gives your toddler back, she's less tired, a little more amused, but still pretty over it. Yara is better with older kids; the ones that are still crying and using diapers are a bit too much. She prefers when it's the three of you together.

[katsumox]

southern bnha boys: rodeo<3

it's what it says in the title, sweets,, just bnha boys as rodeo boys. i miss watching rodeo invitationals and parties :(

note: a buckle bunny is a person who hangs around rodeo guys because they’re hot and they win a lot :)

warnings: cussing, one (1) mention of beer, general southern headassery.

including: katsuki, izuku, hitoshi, and eijirou<3

KATSUKI BAKUGOU— the south’s biggest rodeo brat.

hell of a bull rider. it’s his claim to fame, really. disrespectfully respectful?? he’s the type to roll his eyes at elders yet still say “yes ma’am” and “no sir” to them, but he slurs his words so it’s more like “yes’m”. he also says that when you’re super mad at him, that’s how you know he’s sorry. also opens doors for old ladies and limits his extensive cursing in front of them, except for the word “damn”,,, that’s a permanent word in his lexicon.

has a big ass drawl in his speech, and it’s really hot. all phrases like, “ that’s my girl,” or ��there we are, good girl” also calls you “sweets” and other shit when you do something correctly with him. thinks hell will freeze over before he wears shirts in summer. the best your getting out of him is an open flannel rolled up to his forearms. he works on souping up trucks for the ranch occasionally,, is really mean about the fact that you eat honeysuckle off the ranch grounds because it’s “dirty”,,,bitch,,, it’s nectar?? tf??

hell of a handshake,, the kind that makes fathers smirk and go “that’s a good man” when he’s done. has a small amount of buckle bunnies,,, it’s not because he sucks at rodeo shit, he’s just mean as hell. thinks of you as his lucky charm. you gotta kiss him hard before he saddles up or else he literally will not compete. he’s literally dropped out of a competition because you didn’t kiss him. also likes ranch parties so he can put his hands on your hips as you show him to line dance. pulls you by your belt loop when he wants to go somewhere.

IZUKU MIDORIYA— stable boy at the local ranch during summers.

the sweetest boy you’d ever meet, but he’ll go to war for his mama. very much a mama’s boy; still calls her ma/mama and everything. beat the actual tar out of a cowhand when he heard him say something disrespectful about his mother. lake swimmer. do i need to explain? bc,,, ew. also has a huge habit of saying yes ma’am to ya when you ask for something. known for wearing a wifebeater and some wrangler jeans to work every day throughout the summer.

your mother thinks he'd make a good husband, and she's right. he's sweet, and considerate; he knows his way around a ranch and how to do chores at home. the perfect househusband material in all honesty. quite fond of sneaking sweets to you while he's supposed to be tending to the dogs, yet never seems to get caught. he suspects it's because hitoshi ain't a snitch. also says "i reckon" far to often for my liking, but oh well. that's country boy language.

handshake is kinda weak, tbh. he’s not confident in it, and you can tell, but he grows into it eventually. he’s a huge help around the ranch because he’s fast and the dogs listen to him very well. is a calf roper in rodeo events, one of the best, but wants to start bull or bronco riding. he’d have more buckle bunnies if he were more popular around the ranch, but he just kinda does his job and then hangs around you or the rodeo legacy kids (todoroki and denki)

HITOSHI SHINSOU— the buckle bunnies’ favorite.

like katsuki, a rodeo boy. he’s good at it too. has way more groupies because he’s a bit nicer than kat. known as the playboy around town, but is generally a sweet kid. has a habit of calling you “little girl” no matter if you’re older than him or not. he’s a bronco rider, one of the best around, and wears his winning belt buckles around all the time. not to gloat, it just he genuinely only has prize belt buckles jakskdld. pull him by it and he’ll lose his damn mind.

got you a promise ring with his prize money so that "it'll keep your finger ready for the real one". he's dead set on marrying you. he likes seeing you steal his belts because everyone knows it's his, and by proxy, you're his. makes fun of the way that you don't really care for farm animals, save for the dogs and a few horses. lets you take one out on his break, his large hand up on your lower hip, guiding you and the horse on a slow walk.

also fond of only flannels in the summer, and honestly year round. he’s not very fond is shirts in general. doesn’t like sweet tea, and also isn’t very fond of any jeans that aren’t cavender jeans. he swears up and down that they aren’t as good quality as levi’s or wranglers. takes you night driving on dirt roads and lets you put your feet on his dash. he doesn't do that for everyone.

EIJIROU KIRISHIMA— the south’s knight in shinin’ armor.

chucks your chin a lot, and lets you wear his hat. herding dogs listen to him more than izuku, but only by a little bit. and goes shirtless while working,, almost always, unless he’s fixing a truck with katsuki. then he’ll wear an oil stained white wifebeater. he’s a steer wrestler. it makes sense because he’s so tall and bulky, like a damned brick wall. mothers also consider him marriage material; he's good around the house, he's practical and very respectful.

he has a pretty drawl, like katsuki, when he talks. he isn’t much of a fighter but he will gladly kick ass if someone’s speaking on your name unkindly. nickname around town is "big red" for obvious reasons, and he makes sure to live up to the name. also very adamant on only wearing levi’s to work?? he’s very particular about his work clothes.

has a fixation on calling you his little lady. every time he wins he takes you out to a diner to celebrate, and once, he saved up money to buy you a bracelet with his prize money. also fond of ranch parties where he can drink apple cider and dance with you. he also got permission to drink one (1) coors light with the rest of boys when he's 19 and he takes advantage of that opportunity whenever he can, because parties aren’t often.

taglist:

@smexy-goose @angiebug101 @vanteyves @quincywrites @katsumiiii @mypimpademia @1-800-s1mping @koishiguro @tododekukisses @sobaluvr @silkylious

[souichioneshots]

Souichi x Farmer!Reader

Souichi goes to visit one of his oldest farmer friends for some straw. In return, he makes her a voodoo doll and things get a litttlleee steamy

ahaha idk lol

Souichi heavily breathed through his mouth as he continued to walk down the treeless path. The summer sun shining down on him was making him sweat bullets, and having a large leather satchel cling to his body was starting to make him feel sick.

“Why does she have to live so far away…” Souichi mumbled to himself as he wiped the sweat off his forehead.

Passing a couple more rice fields, a large Japanese-style cottage finally came into view. It was surrounded by a couple of mango trees and 2 PVC greenhouses. He could see from the outside that they were once again filled completely with strawberries and tomatoes.

As he approached the house, he realized that all of the cars were gone. He thought for a second that he came all this way for nothing, but then he heard a familiar voice echoing in the distance.

“Kuro! Way to me! Shiro! Lie down! Hairo! Lie down!!” Souichi quickly made his way to the back of the house, where the voice was coming from.

As he pushed past a large bush, he finally saw you. You had been herding a large trip of white-tan goats and your 3 dogs, Kuro, Shiro, and Hairo were also doing their best to keep the goats in place.

“Y/N!” Souichi called out from a distance, getting your attention.

“Hmm? Souichi!!” You turned around and called back, jumping slightly in the air.

Souichi laughed as the goats also turned in his direction and let out a little “meh” sound as a greeting.

“Give me a second. I’ll be done in a bit.”

Souichi watched from under the shade of a tree as you continued to order your dogs to do their job.

You and Souichi had been friends for as long as he could remember. It was actually his grandmother who introduced him to you when he was younger. She used to get straw and other ritualistic material from your family when she practiced magick, and now he was getting stuff from you as well.

Today, he had come for his usual satchel fill of straw, and anything else you would give him as a gift. You loved to give him gifts. From fresh rice, to mangos, and even white strawberries.

Everyone in the town knew your family used magick because there was no way mangos nor white strawberries could grow in the weather conditions this part of Japan had to offer.

“Sorry for the wait!” You held onto your straw hat as you ran up to the boy. “We actually built a new barn last week for the straw. It’s this way.”

Getting up from his spot, Souichi walked with you to a small open barn located on the other side of your house.

“Woah…” Souichi looked up in awe at the massive amount of straw you had stored up this season.

“Pretty impressive, right? It’s the largest haul we’ve had in years. Praise Ninigi.” Turning towards the sun, you bowed once. Souichi quickly turned with you and did the same.

You laughed a bit at his sudden action. You knew that without his grandmother around, he wasn’t sure how to act in these types of situations. So, he mostly just copied you.

Putting your hand out, you gestured for Souichi to give you his satchel.

"Do you need me to tie them up or can I just stuff it in here?" You asked as you walked over to a large pile of loose straw.

"Just like that is fine." Souichi replied.

Picking up a handful of straw, you neatly placed it inside. When it was finally full enough, you closed it up and handed it back to the boy.

Although it was a lot, it still felt surprisingly light. Hopefully, it won't go to waste this time.

Sitting on a large straw stack, you took off your hat. You shook your head side to side as your long hair flowed from inside the hat and down onto the straw you were sitting on. You had been growing your hair out since kindergarten. Never cutting it once. Just the sheer length of it made you look like a goddess yourself. Although it was a big distraction when you worked, you planned on using your ‘virgin uncut hair’ in future rituals. At least, that’s what you told Souichi.

Patting the empty space next to you, you asked Souichi to sit next down.

“Ma actually took away the voodoo doll you made me last time you came over… Think you can you make me a new one…” You said in a sad voice as you looked at the boy.

“Again?” Souichi replied, sighing loudly.

Although your family practiced black magick in order to keep the farming business alive, you were strictly forbidden from practicing curses and other types of voodoo until you turned ○○. In the meanwhile, your mother forced you to tend to the farm and learn how to be a proper worker. That’s why whenever Souichi came over, in exchange for whatever he wanted, he would teach you anything he knew about black magick in secret.

Currently, you were learning how to make straw voodoo dolls.

You didn’t really have anyone in particular that you wanted or needed to curse, but you wanted to be prepared just in case anything happened in the future.

You smiled widely as the raven-haired boy took out a pair of pruning shears and red string from the front pocket of his satchel.

Grabbing a couple handfuls of straw, you placed them on your lap for him to freely use.

“Don’t look at me like that. You’re making it by yourself this time.” He sternly said.

“Eh~? But I’m tired from doing chores all morning…I’ll give ya a kilogram of rice if you make this one for me~” Souichi just shook his head no. He would need a better incentive if you wanted him to do this for you again.

“Hmmm…Aha! I’ll give you a whole box of fresh white strawberries as well!” Souichi smiled as you offered him exactly what he wanted. There was a reason your family sold their strawberries for over 20,000 yen a box. Getting them for free from you was one of the best parts of coming over.

“Fine. But this is the last time. And pay attention this time.” Humming happily, you handed him a handful of straw.

“First, make a circle with your thumb and index finger. Then place enough straw to fill it completely. When you get the right amount, you use some string to… Uhh... Hold this.”

Handing you the bundle of straw, he used the shears to cut a couple pieces of string to use.

“…Hold it up straight up…Yeah, like that. You tie up the top end around here. Next, you repeat this with another section of straw. When you finish that, you slide one section into the middle of the other. Then you just tie it up here, and here. Lastly, you part it in the middle for the leg sections… And then you tie up those ends and…Done!”

You let out a small whine as your mind failed to keep up with Souichi's speedy motions and vague explanation. You wanted to ask him to do it again, this time much slower, but you knew he would just go at the same speed again.

Cutting the extra pieces of straw that stuck out from the ends of the voodoo doll, he made it look presentable.

“So, what do you think? Pretty good, right?” Souichi proudly said as he handed it to you.

“Yeah! I think it might even be better than the one you made me last time!" You replied as you examined the doll in awe. "So, all I need in order to curse someone is their picture?” The straw crunched in your fingers as you opened up the chest section a bit.

“You can also use their hair, and at times when your hatred towards them is at its peak, you can just write down their name on a piece of paper, stuff it in the middle there, and it’ll work.”

You hummed in amusement as the boy once again explained to you the way straw voodoo dolls worked.

“Hair, huh…” You said to yourself in a voice so quiet not even Souichi could hear.

Moving closer to him, you spoke in a loving voice. “I never did thank you for the last doll you made me, did I?” Putting the doll down on the empty space next to you, you moved to place a quick kiss on the boy’s cheek. “Thank you.”

“Ah! Hehe…I-It was no problem… I can make you more anytime you want really…” Souichi turned his face away from you, trying to hide the blush that had grown on his cheeks.

You were always the affectionate type.

“Then, I should probably thank you in advance~” Bringing your hand to his face, you turned him towards you. Souichi’s body burned with embarrassment as you placed multiple kisses on his cheek again.

“You know, you can also thank me for always giving you so much straw~” You teased as you tapped your own cheek, hinting for him to give you a small kiss back.

Closing his eyes, Souichi moved to plant a kiss on your cheek. However, you also moved back to face him as well.

Souichi’s eyes shot open as you pressed your lips against his.

The remaining straw on your legs fell to the ground as you moved to straddle the blushing boy.

You were perhaps a bit too affectionate really.

But Souichi wasn’t complaining.

Souichi’s eyes fluttered closed as he melted into your kiss. Your hands caressed his face as you quickly deepened the kiss.

Souichi playfully bit your bottom lip as you tried to pull back for air, forcing you to return back to him. He liked to experiment with different ways of teasing you every time you spontaneously kissed him like this.

Slowly, your hands ran through his hair, making it messier than it was before.

"Ow!" Souichi pushed you back and yelled in pain as you suddenly pulled his hair.

Moving to sit up, you gloated.

“Haha! Now that I have your hair, you have to follow everything I say or I’ll curse you to death!” You laughed as you help up a single strand of dark hair. You were expecting Souichi to try to get it back from you, but he didn’t.

Looking back at you with an equally victorious smile, he moved his hands in front of you, showing off the contents it held.

“That makes two of us~ Kekekeke~”

Your smile dropped and your eyes widened in shock as you saw the shears in one hand and a large amount of your hair in another.

Bringing your hands up to your head, you felt the difference in hair length on each side.

“How could you…” Tears ran down your cheeks, making Souichi stop his cackling.

“I hate you!!” Pushing yourself off the boy, you got onto your feet and started to run towards your house. “I’m telling Baphomet!!”

The goats in the barn loudly cried as you mentioned the name of the deity your family religiously worshiped.

“Crap! No!! Y/N!!” Jumping off the straw-stack, Souichi threw your hair and the shears onto the ground.

“Wait!! I’m sorry!!” Souichi exclaimed as he chased after you.

Just before he could grab ahold of you, you ran into the house. You were so upset that you didn’t even bother to take off your shoes.

Souichi slipped on the grass as he tried to stop himself from going any further. He knew he couldn’t enter your house without your given permission.

Souichi felt his mind go into a panic as he saw you approach the large altar in your living room.

The goats in the barn cried even louder and banged their horns against the wooden walls as you pointed towards the boy outside your house.

Just before he could run away for safety, your three dogs surrounded him. Souichi let out a high-pitched cry of fear as the dogs barked and growled, forcing him to stay in place.

He made a big mistake messing with the daughter of the Baphomet worshiping family.

[winter-fox-queen]

I only have my self to blame...

Frankie Morales x you fic 

Tags:  A lot of cursing.  So much cursing.  Drug use.  Angst.  

Summary:  I kept thinking about the coke rap they mention in the story.  And I thought, what if Frankie was innocent?  So most of this is about that, with a tense change so that when the reader enters the picture, it’s “you” -- no y/n.

I have never written a fic before.  I am no nervous AT ALL.  But I wanted to give something back, even though it’s not really romantic.  I logged into my laptop so I could use cuts.  XD  I am ashamed at how long it took me to remember my password.

2,083 words.

It was, really, a bullshit coke rap, but it was still Frankie’s fault.  He was flying one of the boss’s nicer planes, a pretty little Cessna Caravan, fitted out for luxury in the back, a curtain separating the pilot from the main cabin.  The curtain was partly folded back, so the rich folks in the cabin behind him with their booze, lounging in their leather seats don’t have to stare at the back of Frankie’s tousled, ball cap covered head.  

It also meant that he could hear what they were saying, the headset over one ear was quiet, but he’d already decided they were a bag of dicks and he wasn’t going to pay attention to them, as they laughed like a bunch of frat boys behind him.  There was a mirror, angled so he could see what was going on, and once in awhile he’d look.  There were five men and one woman, the men acting like a bunch of frat boys, the woman trying to pretend she was amused.

Frankie knew, of course, that the trouble was men like that made that secret chip on his shoulder come out. The one he tried to ignore.  Because I’m better than that, right?  They ain’t got nothing that I want.  But they did.  They didn’t have to worry about money…they didn’t have a new baby to worry about, they didn’t have to play the game of if-I-pay-this-bill-I-can-pretend-I-didn’t-get-that-one.  He was tired, worried about his lady, scared that he was going to fucking fail her, fail their little girl, Luna.  

He let out a long, pent up sigh.  He itched to put on some music, was considering it when the shuffle of curtain fabric told him he was no longer alone.

The sole woman from the back gave him a shy smile.  “Do you mind? They’re acting like idiots back there.” She had a stylish, blunt cut, a white button shirt and a short, black skirt.  Everything was fitted perfectly so the clothes molded against her.  It looked polished rather than cheap.  He smiled politely  and shrugged as she arranged herself gracefully into the copilot chair.

“So, you said your name was Frankie?”  She reached out with a foot and nudged his chair.  She’d shed her high heels, and, despite the shortness of her skirt was gathering her legs under her.  

Lady, you might as well have a danger sign around your neck.  He nodded, feeling a little out of his depth.  

“Macey.  Pleasure to meet you.  You been a pilot long?”

He nodded.

“You don’t speak much, do you?”  She was flirty enough that even he, usually captain obvious, caught on.

He gave her a sidelong look. “I’m trying to figure out how to slip the face I have a wife and kid into the conversation.”  Wife was a stretch.  He wanted to marry you, he dreamed about it.  He wanted to give you everything – a nice ring, a pretty dress. A day to be a be special, to feel loved. Proof to all your  friends and family that he could take care of you, that he was worthy.  He was scraping up money, setting it aside.  If he didn’t go for a diamond, maybe he could get her something else nice. Maybe an opal.  Opal rings couldn’t be that expensive, right?

She laughed.  “Sorry.  I’m bored.” She held up a hand.  “Scout’s honor, I will do nothing to hurt your marriage.”

He gave her a grin.  “Well, then, tell me a story.”

“A story?”

“Yeah.  Once we touch down in…”  He looked at the time “About two hours, we won’t see each other again. So tell me a story.  Something you’ve always wanted to tell someone, but you couldn’t.”

She arched an eyebrow provocatively.

“Not like that, not a secret.  Just a story you want to tell.  Can be anything, I don’t care.”

She looked bemused for a second.  Then she starts, haltingly, as if she’s never had t actually make real conversation.  As if she’s never had anyone to listen to her.  And the thing is, she’s funny.  Clever. He finds himself laughing as he does his thing, even throwing back a couple of smart remarks of his own.  She has a gift of making him feel like he has a wicked sense of humor, and for a little bit, the cares he’s been harboring fall silent.  

So does the cabin behind him, once.  He has a mirror, set low, so he can see behind him.  The ringleader of the group is glaring at him, not looking too happy.

Well, fuck him. What can he do?  

A lot, apparently.

They land, and Macey gets up to go out the back.  “Thanks, Frankie.  Good luck with everything.”

“You, too, thanks for passing the time with me,” he says, and sets about the tasks.  He checks gauges, writes things down, and finally, goes back and checks over the cabin.  He gets out a basin from a cabinet and puts the used rocks glasses in it.  He won’t wash them – he’ll just dump the basin on the sideboard inside the hanger.  He doesn’t have to do the cleaning, but Allie, the janitor who usually cleaned up the planes, had hurt her back and everything, like picking up candy bar wrappers and throwing them away, checking the seats to see if anything had been left behind was an extra chore she did not need.

The plastic baggy was almost invisible against the beige leather of the seats.  He picked it up, made a shocked little huff, like he’d put his hand on a snake.  Coke. A pretty good amount of it, too. The old craving raised its head, making his hand shake a little.  He heard voices, and shoved the baggy in his pocket.  I’ll pitch it.  He had to take a leak, anyway, he’d go, flush that garbage down the toilet, and there. Done.  He wasn’t that man any more.  It was the one thing he could do for you.

He grabbed the waste basket and put it next to the door, grabbed the tub of glasses and put it under his arm.

“Frankie?  You in there?”

“Yeah, boss…coming.”  Snagging the clipboard to put on top of the glasses so he’d have a free hand if he needed it, he went down the steps and onto the tarmac.

Hector stood there, hands in his pockets, looking ore hang dog than usual.  “Yeah, boss?”

“The passengers said you were flying high, Frankie.”

That stopped him dead, like to concussion from a bomb, hitting his face and chest and taking out the air in his lungs.  “What? No, I’d never…”  

“They said that they saw you – just before take off.  And you know, I don’t want to believe it, but looking at your eyes…they do look awful red.”

“I’ve been up late with Luna.  She’s not been sleeping that great, and I can’t leave it all on…”

Hector nodded, as if he believed him, but Frankie had a feeling he didn’t.  He’d give real money to know exactly what the fuck had been said. “Turn out your pockets, Frankie.”

You jackass.    He attacked himself.  Did you really think they just accidentally left that much coke behind? You fucking jackass.  “I found some shit they left behind, but you gotta believe me, Hector, I am clean.  I’ve been clean for a couple years now.”

“Just show me your pockets, son, then we can just leave this behind.”

He took the coke out. “I told you, I found it on the plane.”

Hector shook his head, and started to walk away.  

“Look, I’ll take a test.” He jogged a little, caught the other man’s arm.  “Seriously. You can watch to make sure I’m not cheating.  You’ll see. I’m clean.  I’ll take a drug test right now.”

“You just happened to find a baggy of coke?  That the passengers happened to leave behind?  And why would they accuse you, if it’s not true?”

Frankie dropped his hand. I guess you wouldn’t believe me if I said some asshole thought I was flirting with his girl and thought he’d get back at me…hell, I’m not sure I believe it.

“I’ll be reporting you. They’ll suspend you.  Maybe they will go easy on you, you being a Vet and this being your first offense…but you need to clean out your locker.  I’ll write a check for what we owe you.”

“I…I need this job.” He could hear an edge of pleading in his voice, and he hated it, but he’d go down on his fucking knees and beg if he had to.

Hector’s eyes hardened. “And I don’t need to send a druggie up in one of my planes.”

**

Frankie took the back roads home.  There was an old farm gate, a place where he could pull off the road and stare, blindly, at overgrown fields.  

“What am I gonna do?” He whispered, over and over, like a mantra.  “What am I gonna fucking do?”  His hands clutched the steering wheel, knuckles white.  He could barely breathe, and when the words wouldn’t come he just sat there, panting, beating his head against the steering when and wondering how he’d survive this.

When his breathing steadied, he got back on the road, and went home.  It was the only thing he could do.

You knew something was wrong, he could see it, but he wasn’t being exactly subtle, pressing his spine against the doorframe like he was ready to run.

“Hey baby,” you say, and he smiles a little.  Tries, anyway.

“Where’s Luna?”  He’s surprised how hoarse his voice is.  He shouldn’t be.  He’d been in some bad situations, but he’d never felt this a drift, this terrified.

“Laying down.”  You say it sweetly, like everything is OK.  You’re cooking bread in the over, something’s in the crock pot and everything smells like home and like everything left to lose.

You lean against the sink. If you reached out, you could almost touch him, but you don’t.  There’s a look in your eyes, like Frankie is a wild animal, easily spooked and so you’re going to move slow and careful.

“I lost my job.”  He says it so quietly he’s not sure you heard, until your shoulders drop a little.  

“Oh, honey, what happened?” No recrimination.  Not yet.  You take a step closer to him.

So he tells you.  He doesn’t lie, just lays it all out there.  Not looking at you, not daring to, instead staring at the refrigerator door and all the magnets and photos and clutter.  But seeing them, either.

“He didn’t believe you?” You practically shriek it out.  “What the fuck…you’ve been an awesome employee for what?  A year and a half now  and he wouldn’t even let you take a damned test to let you prove yourself? Seriously?  I’m going to kick his ass…”

The baby monitor interrupts her, Luna making fitful little noises.  After all, the house was not that big.  You hold a finger up to Frankie.  “Hold that thought.”  You leave the kitchen, shaking your head, and Frankie stands there, feeling like he’s on the edge of the precipice.  

“Ah, Luna, baby, what’s wrong?”  He can hear you, a much gentler, sweeter voice echoing out of the monitor.  He stands over it, hands clutching the counter on either side of it, listening.  You are both everything to him.  Everything.

He listens to you say nonsense as you change the little baby, to you muttering about how such a tiny, adorable thing can smell so bad.  “You must get it from your daddy,”  you say a little louder, as if you know Frankie is there, listening, and he grins a little.

He doesn’t move, when you come back out into the kitchen, when you wrap your arms around him.  You hug him tight and he starts to feel a little less adrift.  

He turns, looks down into your eyes.  “You believe me?”  Puts his arms around you carefully, like he’s still not sure of his reception, because he still doesn’t feel like he deserves this, the right to touch you.  

You reach up and cradle his cheek.  “Always, mi vida.  Always.” And he starts shaking, and he starts crying and he buries his face in your neck so you can’t see, and you toss aside the ball cap so you can stroke his hair.  “It’s going to be alright, honey.  We’ll figure it out.  Its going to be alright.”

[polluxdespell]

TALE OF TWO POES

These are just my headcanons for my 87/Comic Poe and my 2017 Poe. I’m trying to write this before the new ep comes because I wanna see how close my headcanons are to the real one. Ahhhhh.

So for my 87/Comic universe starts out with these basic things.

-Him and Magica are twins.

-Actually a pretty nice and chill guy

-Can’t actually use magic but really, really wants to. He has a wealth of knowledge when it comes to magical items and spells, he just can’t use or summon any magic himself. He learns how to work around this problem, though. Very cleverly. He even fooled Eldritch Academy for years. Ha. 

-Has been a raven for 10+ years which has affected his social skills a tad.

-Would do anything for his sister. ;-; Weh.

-Really not villainy like Magica has a redemption arch and he helps her with that (and sometimes his help wasn’t that helpful by accident,) but he himself is just chilling?

 

Really not as villainous as Magica; has a redemption arch, and helps her become a better person. Sometimes his advice/help doesn’t do much, but it’s the thought that counts.

-For being chill, he sure likes poking his nose in things and being a little troublemaker. Magica can tell Poe, “Hey, make sure Gladstone doesn’t do this thing,” and then when Gladstone does that very thing, Poe is half heartedly just “No. Don’t. Stop.” like that Willy Wonka meme. 

-Poe has a lot of “kid at heart” energy, while Magica is the more serious, adultier-adult one.

- I hint that he is trans. Comments like about him and his sister’s different personalities like “Hard to believe we’re from the same egg.” and “That old dress of mine looks better on you.” But not out right saying it.  Wouldn’t it be just his luck when he was turned into a crow he was turned into a male crow and when he was changed back he just happened to be changed back male and was like, “This is all going according to plan.”  Though out of all the villains I can see Merlock being a misgendering prick. Calling Poe She-lock and He-Witch. What an asshole. 

-Gladstone and Poe had become good friends even before Poe is reverted back to his original duck form.

-Poe is Minima’s dad, but there is some drama regarding the entire thing I hope to cover in a story I’m writing. (I’m really close to finishing that one.)

-I accidentally shipped him with Fethry in this universe lol. I’ve written bits and pieces of several Magicstone stories where Fethry and Poe form a friendship on the side that turns into a romantic relationship. In my future stories one of the main problems with Gladstone x Magica is their lack of communication. They don’t let the other know what they’re going through to ‘protect’ their partner. Meanwhile, I have Poe x Fethry at the same time as them having great communication and just the comparison of that against Magicstone like, look how many less problems Magica and Gladstone would have if they JUST TALKED. 

-Poe and Fethry are also both oversharers so like, this is gonna be great. 

-I’m really really biased with my 87/Comic Poe and Magica headcanons in that they can totally get redeemed. In my headcanon they were raised by their older half-sister till she was killed by hunters when Poe and Magica were thirteen. From that point on they raised themselves. Poe was very supportive of whatever Magica felt she had to do. Yeah the dark magic thing got a little shady but it's fine, its fineeeee.

-I know Poe wasn’t in the comics but I just hmm pretend he’s there with Ratface. In the cartoon Magica mentioned once she needed Scrooge’s number one dime for the spell to turn Poe back. So that is true along with having to do the Midas spell for the Grand Coven she answers to in the comics. 

-He makes friends with Grandma Duck super fast like omg his weak ass noodle arms will figure out how to get some farm chores down for her. GUS YOU NEED TO DO MORE WORK AROUND HERE WHAT THE HELL GUS.

- I never outright say how Poe got changed into a crow but it's something Magica feels is her fault. I’ve debated it being actually the Grand Coven Magica answers to that did it, because he offered to take a punishment for her. Something done in some way Magica feels it's her fault. ;-;

- Since this Poe can’t cast magic he does use magical items to protect himself. His hat does have a magical property I’m not gonna say cuz I needa finish that store. IT'S GONNA BE GREAT. 

---------

Now 2017 Poe I headcanon much differently. First big change is he has magic and he’s an asshat. I really think if 87 Poe had magic he would have been more of a jerk too, but not to the extreme 2017 Poe is. I based 2017 Poe being more villainous like how Magica is more villainous. I love 2017 Magica, she is still a fun baddie, but I don’t have the same hmmm- soft spot for her as I do for comic Magica. 

Also, in my headcanon he has a flare for the dramatic. I realized he’d seem a bit like Black Arts Beagle. I then decided Poe was the one that trained BAB because why not. Same performative flare. Whee. 

I originally headcanon him to be more chaotic Deadpool personality type but seeing Martin Freeman is gonna voice him I bet that's not gonna happen. SOB. God he’s so pretty though. That midriff showing. 

-Just trash man

-Love me that goth trash man

-I would really want him not to be a jerk to Lena. That would cause a divide between him and Magica. He would see her technically as family even though created by magic, and not treat her like crap. And be mad Magica treated her crap.

-Minima was his daughter who died a long time ago. He sees a lot of Lena in her, but realizes Lena is not her. I mean he knows that from the start but would still be sad if they’re in an argument and he calls her Minima on accident. “I won’t always be there to protect you Minima! I- I mean Lena..” SOB. 

-I really didn’t see the same reasons to ship him with Fethry this time around too, but when I saw Steekbeak x Fethry stuff it got me thinking of what Poe went  in disguised as a normal dude to do some McDuck spying and met Fethry and they fell for eachother but then OOPS POE is a VILLIAN. OOPS. Just like the Matilda thing with Magica x Gladstone in the comics. TeeHee.

-No redemption arch just nice to a handful of people ha. Might MIGHT help good guys if the world was gonna be destroyed but oh boy would he have to be talked into it. (Lena could talk him into it.)

[rocksandrobots]

Fanfic Fashion - Cowgirl

I’m going to present each individual outfit I designed for Honey Lemon, so that you can get a better look at them and provide a bit of context. 

This is her outfit for the ‘dude ranch arc’. In this episode, Keri takes everyone to a Texas dude ranch. He wants to impress a rich oil man during business negations and given how family oriented the other millionaire is, hopes bringing a bunch a kids along will make him look good. Unfortunately a bunch of cattle rustlers are planning on kidnapping the oil baron’s daughter for ransom and they mistake Honey Lemon for her.         

Below is a scene for the chapter taken out of context, so mild spoiler warning...

Honey Lemon readjusted the cute cowgirl hat on her head while looking in the mirror on the antique dresser. Her room in the ranch house was small and sparsely decorated, but she didn’t mind. It had a simple rustic charm to it and it was nice to have a bedroom all to herself for a change. 

She gave a little twirl in order to admire her new outfit. Jeans, cowboy boots, and a colorful flannel shirt completed the ensemble and helped to make her feel just like a real cowgirl. Satisfied that she now looked the part, Honey Lemon couldn’t wait to actually live out the fantasy. She had always loved horses as a little girl, but this would be her first chance to actually ride one. 

Mr. Cullen, the ranch owner, had told her that he’d send someone to teach her how to ride. She was to meet them in the barn in an hour after she had freshened up. However, when she got to the barn the only other person there was Varian. 

He was brushing the coat of an old mare, while singing some sort of folk song in his native language. He looked to be completely at home here, no doubt preforming a chore had done a thousand times through out his youth. 

“Hi,” Honey Lemon said once the song had come to an end. She loved haring him sing and didn’t want to interrupt. 

“Oh, hey,” He said sheepishly as if just noticing she was there, ”I’m just brushing down the horses before you ride them.”  

“How come?” 

“Oh, well, you want to make sure that there’s no dirt or debris under the saddle, otherwise the horse will be uncomfortable.” 

“You know a lot about horses, don't you?” 

Varian laughed, “Well I should hope so. They’re the only means of transportation in my world. Everyone knows how to ride one, unless you just enjoy walking everywhere.” 

“What else do you know about them? Like do you have any tips for me?” 

Varian walked over to grab the saddle and placed it on the mare, “Well you always want to mount a horse on the left side.” 

“Why?” 

Varian paused in fasting the saddle, as if he had never considered the question, “I... I don’t know. You just do. The horse will know you’re doing it wrong if you try to mount from the right, and the last thing you want is for the horse to know that you’re inexperience. It won’t listen to you otherwise, and even then they still might not listen to you.” 

“Okay, so how do you get a horse to listen to you?” 

Varian finished strapping the saddle on the mare and then straightened up and placed his hands oh his hips. He mulled over that question for a moment or two as if thinking about it for the first time. 

“I guess, ultimately by being confident. I don’t know, but it has to trust you. If a horse doesn’t trust it’s mount then it’ll do whatever it wants to and that can be dangerous for the rider. Though it also depends on the temperament of the horse.” He patted the mare, “Luciebelle here is a good riding horse. She’s gentle and used to people, I can tell.” 

“Well then how do I get her to trust me?” Honey lemon asked as she gently petted the mare. 

“Well I can show you a trick, my dad once taught me.” And with that, Varian walked over to stand in front of the mare and gently lifted the head up and brought it close to his own face. Then he blew air into the horse’s nose. Then horse seemed to like this and stamped the ground and nuzzled Varian asking for more. Varian laughed as he petted the horse’s nose. “You try.” 

Honey Lemon wasn’t fully sure what she was doing, but she took Varian’s place and preformed the same action just as he did. It worked; Luciebelle nuzzled her back and Honey Lemon giggled with delight. 

“Why does that work?” she asked. 

Varian shrugged, “ I don’t know, but it does.” 

“It’s cause horses show affection with one another that way,” A young woman said. They turned to see a teenaged girl standing at the other end of the stable. She had light brown hair braided into two pigtails and she wore a cowboy hat,  leather skirt and boots, and pink button down shirt. 

“Howdy, I’m Austin.” The new girl introduced herself. “I’m the owner’s daughters. Daddy told me some novices were wanting to learn how to ride but you seem to be an expert. Ain’t often we get city folk who knows what they’re doing.” 

Austin leaned towards Varian with smile as she gave him this complement

“Well, yeah, I grew up on a farm.” Varian sheepishly admitted. 

“Really? Where from?” She asked as she sild closer. 

“Oh Europe,” He dismissed, “You said you was here to teach the riding lessons?” 

“Yeah, but it looks like you don’t need my help,” Austin said with another wide grin as she batted her eyes. “Maybe I can show you around instead?” 

Honey Lemon frowned. Austin hadn’t said more than two words to her since arriving. Not only was she being ignored, but the way the other girl kept trying to get close to Varian irritated her for some reason, though she couldn’t figure out why. 

Honey Lemon closed the distance between her and Varian and hooked his arm into hers, pulling him closer to her possessively. “Varian was going to teach me how to ride.” She lied. 

“Oh sure, I can do that.” Varian agreed and then turned back to Austin, “Maybe you can show us around later?”

Austin blinked as if surprised that she was being turned down. “Oh, well, I’ll see ya later then. I’ll be over at the house whenever you’re done.” She turned to walk away but stopped to say something over her shoulder, “Oh and be careful of prairie dog holes while out there. Greenhorns are all the time getting thrown off cause their horse stepped into one.” 

The tone of her voice when she said the word ‘greenhorn’ told Honey Lemon that the passive aggressive advise was really insult directed at herself. No, she did not like this new girl at all. 

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Midnight”

Happy Saturday, everyone! I’d like to extend a formal congratulations to every Cinder fan in the community. Criticisms of the writing aside, you all struck gold with twelve whole minutes devoted to your fave and I’m absolutely thrilled for you.

We again start with a dark screen and some audio, in this case Cinder’s scrubbing. This technique—along with closeups on eyes—is a real favorite of RWBY’s this volume, to the point where I think they’re a little too enamored with it. But at least this is just a preference, not something that actively harms the storytelling in any way, so it’s welcome to stay. This time, unlike our premiere, we stay on Cinder as her life is summed up with three events intercut with one another: scrubbing floors, getting taunted by boys, and the sound of heels making their way towards her. It’s clear that Cinder leads a poor, miserable life, if her dirty clothes and stronger guys throwing her around is any indication, but all that changes when the rich woman says “I’ll take her” and Cinder is transported to a better life in a wealthy hotel.

At least supposedly.

Here’s my problem with the worldbuilding. This moment has Witcher vibes and Witcher, in turn, built itself off of a trope seen a hundred times before: A young woman is treated terribly by her family, is whisked away by a wealthy/powerful caretaker, and though her life has arguably improved, she quickly learns that the new world she’s entered is just as dangerous and harsh as the one she left. In Witcher’s case, Yennefer is a disabled woman abused by her family, bought by Tissaia, and taken to Aretuza where the other girls hate her and the curriculum is potentially deadly. Cinder is a poor woman arguably abused by her family (scrubbing)/the locals (fights), is taken by an unnamed woman, and whisked away to the swanky hotel where the daughters hate her and the work is potentially deadly due to shock collars. The difference between these two setups is that Tissaia bought Yennefer because of her magical potential. Why does our hotel lady take Cinder?

I mean yeah, obviously she wants a slave, but it’s a little weird isn’t it? Usually when a young woman falls headfirst into a new and questionable life, there’s a solid reason for her entry. This woman—whose lack of a name also says something about the worldbuilding—could have hired anyone she pleased to abuse. As we saw in regards to Atlas and Mantle in the past, every city has its poor and downtrodden. So what made her go out to some random farm and snatch Cinder up? It just, as always, feels a little too convenient. Cinder didn’t enter this life because something about her characterization or origin justified it, the plot simply ensured that she, out of everyone possible, and with very little reason, was the one chosen to follow The Plot™ .

It also messes with the Cinderella parallels. Originally (or “originally,” going off of Disney here which is likely what RWBY is using as a template too) it’s her step-family that abuses her and yes, we recreate that via the hiring (“hiring”—I doubt she was paid), but Cinder was already scrubbing floors back home. Her status as the servant already existed. So why change locations? Why not just keep Cinder as an abused farm girl, or have her a part of the hotel family right from the start? Part of the reason why Cinderella resonates is because of the contrast between the happy life with her father and the new, horrific life she falls into once he dies. Which is then further contrasted by the rest of the outside world. Fairy Godmother, Prince, and party-goers alike are all presented as kind, decent people. They represent the “real” world that Cinderella can escape to. By making Cinder’s original life horrible, her new life worse, and everyone connected with that life cruel and/or indifferent (with the exception of this one, special huntsmen)… you paint a very different picture of the world as a whole. Which is something RWBY has been vocal about trying to accomplish—it’s not a fairy tale—the only problem is with how these moments are undermined the second the story wants Ruby to ~Believe in People~. Cinderella is a story about enduring and eventually overcoming temporary hardship. Cinder’s story is about endless hardship that creates villains. A dark and fascinating story… but how does that fit into last week’s episode where Ruby told the whole world about Salem, expecting them to band together in peace and harmony? This is how Remnant’s world treats people when there’s not a global crisis, and Cinder isn’t even a faunus.

Which, I want to make clear going into the rest of this recap, does not excuse Cinder for her actions. At all. I think there are some complicated acknowledgements to be made in terms of her abuse and the Huntsmen’s responsibility in it continuing, but that does not give Cinder a blanket pass for all the horrific shit she has pulled over the years. Cinder didn’t just defend herself from abusers, she became one. More on that in a minute.

First though… is the Huntsmen’s name Rhodes? Did we hear that in the episode? If we did, I totally missed it because I have a note here about the one important character not getting a name. So yeah, idk. If we got this from more supplemental info, bad RWBY. If I missed it, bad Clyde. Either way, I’ll use that name going forward.

Back to the plot at hand. The hotel is, as said, populated by indifferent and shallow people and there’s no desert nearby, so I presume we’re supposed to be in Atlas? (Why did this woman buy a girl from another Kingdom?) There are customers getting drunk, flirting, and generally just enjoying their wealth, which harkens back to Weiss’ comment in Volume 4 about all their problems being superficial. We’re introduced to the owner’s two daughters who are, as expected, quintessential Mean Girls. 

They love ordering Cinder around, not just with hotel chores, but personal ones as well like, “rub my feet”… despite the fact that this place is massive and must have an equally massive staff to stay in business. Why aren’t the girls terrorizing anyone else? Again, it makes sense for Cinder(ella) to be the focus of their abuse when she’s in a single household, but transplanting that to a hotel raises a lot of questions that RWBY hasn’t bothered to examine. You can’t move a story like that and not think about what further changes that would evoke.

See, RWBY could have done something interesting here by considering some of those other changes. Like having one or both step-sisters be the one to help free Cinder from her abuse, playing the villain before becoming the fairy godmother. Up until she turns villain instead of hero, this is just Cinderella’s story copy and pasted into RWBY. It’s moments like this that should make us wary of using fairy tale allusions as evidence for our readings and theories. Whether RWBY is deconstructing or upholding a story varies wildly, and we never know what we’ll get until we actually see it on screen. Even then we can’t count on a choice remaining consistent, as we saw with Ironwood’s deconstruction being tossed out the window in Volume 7.

Cinder is originally just as meek as her fairy tale counterpart too. We don’t hear her speak until the owner is about to leave when she simply goes, “Food?” The sisters laugh at her and a roll is thrown to the floor with the comment that she should get busy because it “looks filthy.” I quite like that moment. Your job is to ensure the floors are clean enough to eat off of—literally.

We see a montage of Cinder doing just that, lots of chores, with a new song listing all the tasks she’s now responsible for. During this, Rhodes is seen in the background and witnesses when Cinder (presumably) first uses her semblance by heating up the brush and chucking it at the sisters, creating a massive cloud of steam.

 It’s that moment which “earns” her a shock session with her necklace and I’m staring at the screen, a little open-mouthed. I mean, that’s the second child torture we’ve seen this volume (with Cinder being ten here). Again, I’m not making a specific accusation, just going, “Really?”

Also, note the anti-faunus sign. Nothing like continually showing us racist establishments rather than actually writing a story that deals with the racism needless put into the story world. I’d like to remind everyone of my previous comments this Volume about how the story works hard to paint Mantle as sympathetic, but refuses to show anything that does the same for Atlas citizens, people who are in just as much danger with Salem as an equalizer. A whole city is not actually made up of shallow racists, the show is just showing us only those people to create a simplistic “They’re all bad” reading that encourages us to reject Atlas and, by extension, Ironwood. Weiss is walking proof that Atlas citizens are both complex individuals and capable of bettering themselves. If we can come to adore the Schnee heiress, we should be questioning why nearly every other citizen is painted as an abuser, too wealthy to care, or has conveniently left the story (Rhodes dead, Klein gone, Whitley rejected, etc.).

As Cinder is being tortured, we see that she’s forced to say, “Without you, I am nothing.” Now see, this is excellent... in theory. This is the kind of line we needed to hear with some consistency over the last seven years (if RWBY still insisted on waiting that long for a backstory), setting up that this line is clearly engrained in Cinder and she repeats it on instinct. Instead—to my recollection, anyway—we only get it this Volume, in two episodes. If it appeared before then it wasn’t notable enough to remember. I commented on this before, but it wasn’t a, “Ah, this line must be important” reaction, it was a “Lol why is RWBY using the same line twice? That’s weird.” By only giving it to us twice before the backstory and in such a short timeframe, the impact of this reveal is lost. We’re only now realizing that the line is important, rather than coming to realize why.

Our writers know just enough to recognize what techniques work, but not enough to have figured out what makes them tick. They get that providing a RWBY-vised version of Cinderella is cool, but not how to adapt that 100% successfully. They know that repeated lines have power, but not how to create good setup for the reveal. They know the camera should use closeups, but not what moments are important enough to warrant that. RWBY, eight years on, still feels like a newbie writer copying what the great stories are doing without yet understanding why those aspects work and, thus, how to recreate them.

I mean, Cinder’s backstory appearing now attests to that most obviously. I waved at the Cinder fans before, but the reality is that most viewers don’t care, either because Cinder herself is so bland, and/or because the story waited too long to make her a little more interesting. This entire flashback was handled badly simply by virtue of it arriving over seven years past the character’s introduction. 

So after this torture session Cinder steals Rhode’s sword. We hear some dialogue in the background of him getting pissed that it’s missing and the sisters promising to find it, implying that Cinder will have this tool at her disposal for a while. Instead, seconds later he’s found her hideout and confronts her. I don’t know if I’m impressed with Rhode’s skills, or rolling my eyes at how contrived this all is. Chuck in the question of whether Cinder was talented enough to steal the sword out from under him, or if Rhodes was stupid enough to leave it lying around, and I’m edging towards the eye rolling.

He dodges Cinder’s attack, rolls her more weapons to prove he’s not here to hurt her, and acknowledges that she’s not getting “the most fair treatment.” Okay, here’s where things start to get complicated. Rhodes tells Cinder she shouldn’t run away because then she’ll be running her whole life (don’t really agree with that). He likewise (rightly imo) tells her not to straight up murder them because look, no matter how much of a shit stain someone is, I can’t condone slamming a sword through their chest on an individual’s say-so (especially when two of those people are also kids growing up under an abuser, like Whitely). So what’s left? Rhodes says Cinder can train to become a huntress. At ten years old, she has seven years to prepare for the exam.

But she has to stay with her abusive family until then.

My problem is far less with the claim that this “has” to happen and far more with the writing’s failure to tell us why. Cinder could have begged to come with Rhodes and he says she can’t because… idk. Make up a reason. He doesn’t make enough to feed the both of them. It would be too dangerous out on missions without training and he doesn’t have a permanent place to stay (hence using the hotel all the time). He could even go the “They’re your legal guardians” route with more explanation because it’s arguable that Rhodes had no idea about the collar. Doesn’t mean Cinder’s treatment isn’t “that bad” in his eyes, just that he might not have known the extent and thus thought it was preferable for Cinder to put up with “just” being insulted and overworked until she’s 17. That this life that he only has a partial picture of is preferable to the life she’d have at his side. Something to explain the stakes here, the risks, and why he took this stance. 

And/or give us a reason why Cinder doesn’t try to run, a suggestion I make very cautiously because it’s not my intention to put the responsibility solely on her. This isn’t meant to be a “Just save yourself! It’s easy!” claim. Rather, it’s an acknowledgement that young, barely trained kids go out into the world all the time in this show—Ruby, Oscar—and it’s an acknowledgement that Cinder tugged off her collar easy-peasy. The point is, practically speaking, Cinder could have left and braved the streets like Emerald did… so give us a reason why she decided to stay. Maybe she’s scared of living on the streets, acknowledging that a little food and a place to sleep is better than nothing. Maybe she’s scared that if she doesn’t have a direct connection to the hotel (convenience), Rhodes won’t train her anymore. Maybe, as an abuse victim, she can’t articulate why she won’t leave, she just can’t. Something to acknowledge these gaps because, right now, we just have the fandom going, “See? This is why the huntsmen are all evil cops. Rhodes took the lawful route and look where it got Cinder! He’s the responsible adult in this situation, so it’s all his fault.” Problem is, this take ignores: 

The fact that our heroes are also huntsmen and were pretending to be huntsmen before they had those lawful licenses. So what does that make them? We can’t continually criticize these professional roles without criticizing our heroes’ use of them as well. Ruby just ensured the world would take her message seriously by introducing herself as a huntress. We can’t condemn these laws and privileges while likewise letting Ruby continue to use them however she please. It’s okay if she’s a part of the system, because Ruby is inherently good! That’s not how this works. I’ve just described every American cop show that tumblr is currently turning against: The system is corrupt and needs to be overhauled, but our protagonists are different. 

The story fails to tell us why Rhodes won’t do more outside of a single line about Cinder being of legal age. That just acknowledges that age has some bearing on his decision, not whether it outweighs other considerations (can Cinder survive if she leaves?), or whether Rhodes even has a full picture of what’s happening to her (the collar). The takeaway is that we don’t know what his though process was because RWBY didn’t show it to us, not that his thought process is automatically awful. 

Rhodes, as a literal stranger entering her life, is not 100% responsible for what happens to Cinder. I know people don’t want to acknowledge that because leaving a child in that situation is absolutely horrific, but if RWBY wants to be ~realistic~ (and it does) then we need to acknowledge that reality too. If you saw a child employee getting yelled at in a hotel and then found her with your sword, would you rip the collar off her neck and be like, “Congratulations, you’re my child now”? Nice as that trope is, probably not! Or hell, maybe a lot of you would upend your life and risk legal action to whisk them away, but a lot of other people wouldn’t... and they're not the devil for doing what they can within the bounds of the law. The idea that because Rhodes unexpectedly had one (1) encounter with Cinder means he’s now responsible for her life and outcome is, well, crazy. “But, Clyde, you can’t just see that kind of horror and not do something about it.” You’re right. You know what you do? Tell the authorities. But does Remnant have the equivalent of social workers? We don’t know! Which means we can’t assume that Rhodes didn’t call them just because he’s a bad person. Or maybe they exist and the fandom considers them too corrupt to be useful, like so many other authorities in this show. So… what else is there for him to do? There doesn’t seem to be anyone above Rhodes that he can turn to, he doesn’t (for whatever reason) want to essentially kidnap Cinder and start a new life with her, so what’s left? Try to give Cinder a healthy relationship and a way to escape in the long run, which is precisely what Rhodes did. 

Honestly, I’m kind of salty that this guy went out of his way to help her, he saw what everyone else saw and was the only one who would help her, but because he didn’t do more—because he didn’t entirely upend his life and/or risk arrest to take her away to this hypothetically better situation—the fandom is acting like it’s his fault Cinder killed her abusers. It’s not. Cinder made that choice.

At the end of the day, blaming Rhodes reveals the expectation that it’s his responsibility to solve this massive problem purely because he had the bad luck to be the one Cinder stole from. That’s like telling a teacher who learns about abuse from a paper that following the lawful channels and going out of his way to assist the child in other ways is responsible when the kid murders their family one day. “Why didn’t you just barge into the house and take the kid?!” Because there are a hundred reasons why that would go incredibly badly? Rhodes can’t help Cinder if he’s in jail. Rhodes can’t help Cinder if she ends up dead on a mission while following him. Rhodes can’t help Cinder if their attempt at escape fails and she bears the punishment. 

The only thing I think Rhodes did absolutely wrong was giving Cinder the sword while she was still under the owner’s thumb. Stupid, but not cruel. And again, stupid does not equal blanket responsibility. I’m likewise seeing, “Rhodes gave her the sword and thus it’s his fault that Cinder got in trouble. It’s his fault they died. What was Cinder supposed to do, not defend herself?” Are people forgetting that Cinder stole the sword herself in the beginning and then readily accepted it again? She had agency in obtaining weaponry and what she wanted it for. Are people forgetting that, in accepting it, she likewise accepted the risk of keeping it hidden in the hotel? Are people forgetting that the time skip shows this happening years later and that Rhodes clearly thought Cinder was past her murderous streak? Are people forgetting that Cinder killed the owner by snapping her neck and resisting the shock collar, no sword required? She could have killed them any time she pleased based on the crime scene, whether Rhodes had given her a weapon or not. The weapon was just the catalyst that, truthfully, could have been caused by anything else. Cinder snaps when they find the sword and she’s tortured. Cinder snaps when she drops another tray and she’s tortured. She had planned to kill her abusers and never completely let go of that. 

Honestly, I’m just annoyed that we have another good hearted, takes action, does his best and makes some mistakes character getting blamed for everything another character chose to do, erasing their agency in the process. Rhodes did not abuse Cinder. Rhodes did not force her to kill her actual abusers. And Rhodes is certainly not responsible for what Cinder later becomes. Could Rhodes have done more? Of course, but every character could always do more. 

The tl;dr is that this complex situation needed far better setup in the show and the fandom needs to stop using that lack of setup as “proof” that characters are horrible people when they fail to magically fix said complicated, badly explained problems. Cinder chose to murder three people. Whether that was justified in the face of her abuse is up to you to decide, but it was still her choice. Please stop blaming the adult male characters for the choices the teenage girls in this show make. RWBY is too convoluted and attempting to tackle too many complex issues to reduce that to, “Every man here is the evil, responsible party and ever girl is a #queen. Even when they go on to murder Pyrrha ^_^” As a woman who would very much like to be rooting for the mostly-woman cast more than I now do, this isn’t the feminist take people want it to be.  

But I’ve jumped waaaay ahead. Let’s backtrack a bit.

That first interaction between Rhodes and Cinder is super weird because the camera keeps covering Rhodes’ face and I don’t know why. 

We segue into that montage of him training her for presumably years (Cinder’s hair changes) until we see him giving her the sword in what’s meant to be a moment of pride and trust. Soon after, Rhodes (randomly) comes back to the hotel when everyone else is asleep and hears noises in the back. Moving to check them out, he discovers that Cinder has murdered the two sisters and is in the process of murdering the owner, throwing back the line, “Without you, I am nothing, but because of you, I am everything.” Again, much more impactful if this had been a line we’ve associated with Cinder for years now, not a couple of episodes.

After she breaks the owner’s neck (damn, strong hand!) she tells Rhodes she doesn’t have to run anymore. Cinder clearly expects him to be happy for her and is shocked when he takes out his weapons.

I’m sorry, this is not a “betrayal.” Could Rhodes have just let Cinder go? Sure. Should he have? Given what she becomes, that’s very debatable! Rhodes clearly thought he’d helped her grow into someone who was not inclined towards murder (giving her the sword) and thus is probably going to be a little rattled when he walks in to find her killing three people. Again, there are obvious differences given the level of abuse Cinder seems to have suffered in comparison, but imagine that Glynda, after teaching Weiss for years, walked in on her killing Jacques and Whitley in revenge. Is she supposed to just ignore that? Shrug her shoulders and wish her well? I know a lot of people consider that the “fair” outcome given the inclusion of abuse, but that’s because we’ve had an omniscient view of Cinder’s history and insight into her emotional state. Rhodes doesn’t have that. All he has is his oath as a huntsmen to prevent things like, you know, murder sprees. I’m not going to delve into the overall ethics of a judicial system, either in RWBY or the real world, and thus I’m not going to make any naive claims about it being fair—it’s fucking not—but I don’t think the answer to these systematic problems is, “Why wouldn’t you just let the teenager murder three bad people and then go on her way? She totally deserved it!” Rhodes is not in a position to decide that, which is the entire point of having a judicial system in the first place. 

So Rhodes wants to bring Cinder in. Kind of like how Clover wanted to bring Qrow in once he had an arrest warrant. I can’t emphasize enough that wanting to start a legal process rather than letting clearly guilty/potentially guilty people go because they WANT to is not a “betrayal.” Regardless of what teen dramas may have taught us, you don’t have to potentially throw your own freedom and your morals away because you found out a friend is wanted by the authorities. Or you walk in on them currently snapping someone’s neck. There are options other than, “Believe your friend is right without question and help them hide the bodies” (looking at you, Maria, Pietro). Whitely is not insane for going, “Hey, can you not make me an accomplice to a crime by forcing your way in here with a bunch of fugitives?” I’m constantly surprised by the number of fans who can, in one breath, condemn characters for not throwing a middle finger up at the law and in the next praise Jacques’ arrest. Do we want to benefit from this system or not? If yes, that means you have to weigh which laws can be broken (such as in a protest), which should be obeyed (bring murderers and wanted men in), all while working to change the laws that are prejudice and aren’t working. 

Anyway, they fight. It’s short and sweet, backdropped by the large clock striking midnight, hence our title. I’m incredibly suspicious of Cinder breaking Rhode’s aura first, given that she’s still the student in training, but here we can more persuasively say he wasn’t fighting seriously, given that he then stupidly rushes towards her without a weapon. Still, that would be the second time now that RWBY has relied on elite fighters “holding back” to explain how the kids in training beat them, the first instance, of course, being with the Ace Ops.

Rhodes does rush Cinder though when she hits the wall and breaks her own aura, clearly concerned. She uses the moment to stab him with both swords. He uses his last breaths to put a hand on her head, conveying that he doesn’t blame her for how this all turned out.

Then Cinder pulls off her collar with a single snap and looks up at the broken moon, crying her single tear.

I’m dragging the flashback for multiple reasons, but I want to emphasize that I think this episode is leagues better from what we got last week. Absolute night and day. It’s just that, as always, improvements are incredibly comparative in RWBY. It’s not really good for numerous reasons… it’s just better than what we’ve gotten before. It’s “great” provided you go in with standards buried in the ground.

We then return to the present as Cinder wakes up in Salem’s whale. This scene gives us a great shot of her grimm arm, so cosplayers take note!

Emerald arrives soon after and immediately rushes to her side, expressing how worried she was. She grabs Cinder’s grimm hand without hesitation. Honestly, I don’t care much about either character… but this single frame activated some sort of ship button in my brain.

Not fully because I’m personally not drawn to toxic relationships in fiction (which, as I’m about to explain, would absolutely be the case here), but just the tinniest bit. Because I’m a sucker for monstrous people being loved despite their monstrous nature, so having Emerald take that hand over the other is like a ship speed run for me.

I’m predictable, folks.

But we need to talk about less happy things for a moment. I mentioned above Cinder becoming an abuser herself. I hope I don’t need to lay out the laundry list of murders, attempted murders, sabotage, and general taking-over-the-world-ness she’s engaged in since Episode One. Don’t let a sad backstory erase all that. Hell, for all we know the hotel owner had a horrific backstory too! Doesn’t justify how she treated Cinder. The point though is beyond her clear status as a villain, we now know that Cinder treats Emerald just like the owner once treated her.

Cinder was “rescued” from her life on the farm by the owner. Emerald is “rescued” from her life on the streets by Cinder.

Both realize over time that the situation they’re now in is actually worse.

Both reiterate that they “owe” the other “everything,” with Cinder having that shocked into her and Emerald seeming to willingly believe it.

The owner treats Cinder as a slave. Cinder treats Emerald as a slave. “Both of you, get out. I’ll let you know when you’re needed.” The only difference is that Cinder’s orders were things like “Scrub floors” and Emerald’s are “Convince an audience this girl attacked our ally.”

Both use threats to keep the other in line: the owner with her shock collar and Cinder with her Maiden powers. Cinder doesn’t need to resort to violence (yet) because Emerald adores her, but the threat is always there. 

There are even visual similarities this episode, such as kneeling and gem necklaces, though I acknowledge fully that those are just interesting details as opposed to anything like persuasive proof. 

The point is that Cinder became exactly what she hated, she just turned the dial up to eleven by going after the whole world instead of a single child. “But Cinder never had a chance to be anything else.” Sure she did. Blake and Weiss are proof of that. Even if we believe that Cinder was doomed to be a villain due to the extent of her abuse, what does that say about the hotel’s owner? We don’t know anything about her history, so what if she was abused too? Does that mean she was always “doomed” to treat Cinder that way? Does that excuse everything she did to her because she supposedly never stood a chance of becoming anything else? Of course not.

Though very iffily done, this is a commentary on the cycle of abuse. Each case is horrific, but it doesn’t excuse what comes later. Every abuser was once an innocent child and every innocent child has the capability of becoming the next abuser. Cinder’s life up until now was beyond awful and yes, she lacked a lot of privileges that others had to help them head down a better path, like Weiss’ wealth. On the other hand, she lacks other difficulties that would make that path harder for others, like Blake’s status as a faunus. Everyone has a choice to make: Will you treat others the way you were treated because that’s “fair,” or will you decide to treat others better than what you were dealt? There are lots of aspects that factor into the likelihood of someone choosing the latter—which is why I really like Rhode’s hand on Cinder’s head, acknowledging his understanding that she’s an abused kid taking the only path she thinks is available to her—but individual agency is by no means removed from the equation. Cinder escaped her situation and decided she’d never be powerless again. What does that mean to her, perhaps becoming a community member who works to prevent abuse like the kind she suffered? No, it means grinding the entire world under her heel until she’s the only one with power left.

This GIF continues to be the only one I need.

(No, the fact that it comes from a cop show and I’m using it for such an anti-law, anti-establishment story/fandom isn’t lost on me.)

(Also, if anyone is curious, this is why I love Ozpin. Out of everyone in this cast, HE has suffered the most, tenfold, and yet he still chooses to be kinder to those than they’ve been to him.) 

Anyway, I should really stick to the plot lol. Cinder realizes that her waking up means that they’ve lost, which I still think is BS. Cinder needed a win to come across as a formidable villain again and the likes of Neo, Emerald, and a Maiden with years of practice under her belt should have wiped the floor with a scientist, retirement grandma, and a girl who got the powers an hour ago. But I again digress.

Mercury reveals that he will no longer be following Cinder’s orders because Salem has a special job for him. They’ve all been told to meet on the bridge.

Then we cut to Ozpin and Oscar.

My poor boy is a mess and Ozpin is in the process of begging Oscar to take a “break.” “I would like to express again that this is my burden to bear, not yours.” Take note, fandom. In a few moments Hazel will accuse Ozpin of being a “coward” because “All this time, it could have been you, but you let him suffer.” I just know a bunch of people will be going, “Yeah! Ozpin just let a kid get tortured instead of him. WTF??” Okay 1. We should always be suspicious of agreeing with the takes villains have and 2. Oscar just refused to let Ozpin do that. It is—again—his choice because he thinks that Hazel is “holding back” with him. Oscar is being a brave and logical dude trying to make the best of this situation for both of them. Don’t take that away from him just to make Ozpin look bad. What would we even want him to do? Take control back? The fandom has been yelling at Ozpin for that since Volume 5.

So they’re going back and forth when Oscar suddenly announces that they “can’t leave yet. This is our chance.”

Ozpin even says he thinks Oscar must have taken one too many hits because… yeah. What? Long story short, Oscar recognizes that they’ll never be this close to Salem’s subordinates again and that they should try to undermine her from the inside out, just like she’s done with the world since she knows she can’t take on everyone at once. I love Oscar taking charge here, I love them speaking in unison, I even love the hope of achieving something epic while in captivity despite my own belief that Oscar should break and reveal the Lamp’s password. What I don’t love is:

Another messy, unexpected belief that Salem made her choices because she “knows” she can’t win any other way. Except that—like Ruby’s line in the recording—Salem’s current attack blows that idea out of the water. She IS taking on the whole world. Granted, Ozpin and Oscar presumably don’t know that the whole world literally knows of her existence now, or that Salem was smiling about it, but they do know that she’s attacking Atlas head on. What else is that except a declaration of war with all of Remnant?

The idea of undermining Salem from the inside via Hazel. For anyone who reads my other metas, I just said that this idea wouldn’t work because Emerald isn’t the one torturing him, the one character who has consistently demonstrated hesitation (or, now, Neo). Hazel despises Ozpin so much that he would never listen to him. He despises him so much he doesn’t even see Oscar as his own person… at least he didn’t before. That’s been retconned now with Hazel going “easy” Oscar and having an actual conversation with Ozpin. Whereas before, he was slamming Oscar into walls and screaming about how he’s going to kill the “murderer” of his sister. They basically softened his character to make this plan possible.

The fact that this scene came about without Oscar and Ozpin ever getting to reconcile their problems. Last we saw them, Oscar was saying how he hated that Ozpin came back and refusing to acknowledge their merge. Now, they’re working together like they’ve always been solid allies. I get that the danger they’re in helps to put it all into perspective, but why can’t we get a few lines of them hashing this out? Or at least putting things aside until they’re out of Salem’s clutches? If you don’t need to re-write Hazel’s character with “he’s going easy on me” lines, you can use that space to deal with the conflict we’ve already established. Especially given the strange choice to have Oscar refuse to give up control and be the one coming up with this plan... but then Ozpin does take control and (maybe, see below) enacts it? I feel like we’ve missed huge chunks of this story. As it is, I wonder if RWBY will bother coming back to this. The questions of if/how Oscar will accept Ozpin and if/how he’ll reveal this secret to the group feels like they’re being swept under the rug and it will likely go unnoticed by a lot of viewers simply due to how intense the kidnapping plot is.

So things are a little messy, but otherwise enjoyable, and they’re about to get downright confusing. For me, anyway. See, Hazel reveals that he follows Salem because she can’t be beaten (cue my continued worry about Ruby telling the whole WORLD). She “can’t be stopped. She’s a force of nature,” and Ozpin is fighting a “cause with no victory, no end.” He yells back that “Someone has to try!”—bless this man—and then looks down at the ground going, “Salem can be fought. Unless… she brings the Relics together, if that happens…” and mentions summoning the Gods.

So here’s my confusion. The scene makes it feel like Ozpin is planting some sort of seed in Hazel’s head. He and Oscar JUST got done agreeing to try and undermine her from the inside out, then we get this line that feels like him “accidentally” dropping a secret that will turn Hazel against her. Except… Ozpin doesn’t lie here? The line isn’t useful to them as far as I can tell. They are screwed if Salem gets the Relics. …Right? Because if not, why the hell have the heroes been working so hard to keep them out of her hands? So I can’t decide if:

A) This scene is just written badly and none of this is part of the plan to undermine Salem.

B) Ozpin is going, “NO. Don’t collect the RELICS. That would be the WORST THING EVER /s” in an attempt to trick Hazel into doing it anyway and this is somehow supposed to hurt Salem, despite being presented since Volume 5 as the worst outcome for our heroes? 

C) Ozpin specifically wants Salem to make the mistake of summoning the Gods because he thinks he’s completed his task? Or something? But what in the world would make him think that—especially without seeing Ruby’s message (not to mention the lack of unity that mess should cause)—or what makes him think the Gods would just destroy Salem regardless of what he’s achieved? If summoning the Gods was ever a defeat Salem option, why hasn’t he done it before?

I’m leaning towards A just because it makes the most sense by far, but that would also mean we had Ozpin and Oscar decide on this plan, have a chance to start this plan… and then didn’t actually do anything. Yelling at Hazel for following Salem isn’t a new strategy, they were doing that before, so what’s new? Or has the new strategy not been revealed yet? Idk, as happy as I am to see them being BAMF together, I’m slightly unsure about how it all hangs together. I’d much rather have an internally consistent and clear outcome that’s predictable (Oscar breaks or just holds out until rescue) rather than what appears like a super cool, badass, unexpected plot on the surface… but crumbles once you poke at the foundation a bit.

So whether Oscar and Ozpin started this plan or not, they’re dragged into the throne room where they’re forced to kneel before Salem. Yikes. She sits on her throne with the Hound, who I’m only now realizing could be read as a messed up Toto

We learn that Tyrian heard from Watts about his incarceration and hacking Penny. What? Okay, I took the time to go back through “Amity” just to find this screenshot.

That’s not a working Scroll! Idk what I thought Watts might do with it at the end of last week, but it wasn’t send a full, uninterrupted message to Salem that updates her on everything that’s gone down in Atlas. This thing is toast! Moments like this make me question how much communication there really is between the writers and the animators, despite last Volume’s disaster with Oscar telegraphing his punch like whoa. Are we still getting that level of miscommunication? 

Salem then punishes Cinder for disobeying her by hurting her grimm arm. See, this here (for me, anyway) is the mark of a newbie writer. When the moment first started I went, “Oh nice. Just like the shock collar!” Then the scene made that abundantly clear by cutting to flashbacks of Cinder in her collar. That’s too heavy-handed. We already got the parallel, but then the show went, “Do you get it??” It shows that the writers are too scared that the viewers won’t get it, that their nuance will be lost, so they scramble to make it as obvious as possible, rather than trusting in their own writing.

And if you’re like, “So you want RWBY to be more clear and also… less clear?” the answer is, sadly, yes lol. The things that are already confusing due to retconning and inconsistent themes need to be made explicit, whereas the details that are already strong don’t need an in-your-face, “Okay, but did you really get the parallel here? We’re just making sure.” It’s like launching into explaining why a joke is funny when it’s already landed vs. telling a nonsensical joke and then waiting for the laugh that will never come. RWBY struggles in both areas.  

Salem delves into this speech about how this is actually all her fault and she should let Cinder spread her wings or something. AKA, go free Watts and track down Penny. Then you can have your precious Maiden powers. 

There’s a massive earthquake across Mantle and we watch a + medical symbol go out. Again, heavy-handed. We don’t need that in order to understand that the whole city shaking while the grimm look happily up to the sky is a bad thing.

We cut to Winter listening to the Ace Ops complain about Penny. She tells them to act like the elite they are, likely because she hates how they refer to Penny as “junk.” Still being set up to betray Ironwood, I bet. During this scene we learn that they have “confirmed visual of her leaving Amity. She appeared to be malfunctioning.” So Penny is alive? Also, they have eyes on Amity Tower and were able to see Penny leaving, but didn’t see any of our trio coming to launch it in the first place? Did Ironwood want it to launch? Did they see Cinder? I just don’t know.

Before they can get there though a message from Jaune comes through. Serious kudos to Team JNY for asking that “anyone” respond/taking the personal risk of calling for help in the first place. They’re finally putting—as Harriet says—they’re own selfishness aside in favor of the greater good. Yang obviously hates that it’s “you guys” they ended up with, but she’s not outright attacking the Ace Ops or anything. I’m like,

Excellent job, Yang. 

Jaune is a little harsh in his panic. He said in his message that a “large mass of grimm” is heading towards Mantle and then when Harriet leads with asking about Penny, wants to know what’s wrong with her. Why are you asking about Penny when lives are in danger and “it’s” (the grimm) are “right there”? Except he, uh… points at nothing. There’s the chasm with (I presume) the weird grimm goo down it? Not sure based on the shot, but the Ace Ops expected a “mass of grimm” and then land to see no grimm anywhere nearby. So yeah, they’re more focused on the missing Maiden than the seemingly imaginary enemy Jaune is freaking out about.

They only get on board when the river launches itself at Atlas.

So the goo is, like, sentient before it becomes individual grimm? Or Salem is controlling it from her whale? Either way it’s BAD.

I want to briefly gripe about how the hell everyone is watching this. What, is there a camera conveniently trained on this one random part of Atlas’ underside and everyone’s scrolls tuned into that the second the attack started? It seems far-fetched, to put it mildly. In RWBY’s favor though, I want to acknowledge that we finally have appropriate expressions for the situation! This is good!!

I’m going to level with you all. My notifications have known no peace since I made the mistake of criticizing the adored trio that is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. I thought supporting Ironwood would get me heat. Nope. Not supporting the main girls is what did it and honestly? I shouldn’t have been surprised. Last week I pointed out that having them smile and, in Ruby’s case, coo during a moment of horror is not good animation and implies some pretty uncomfortable things about their overall sympathy level. The image in question: 

It doesn’t set a good tone, especially when we add in what we’ve gotten for Ruby’s group across the rest of this volume. The counters of, “They need and deserve a break. Why won’t you let them be happy?” fall flat when we ignore that this group has been animated as consistently goofing off post-premiere. Sneaking into the guarded military base of a former friend? Tube shenanigans! Need to find your way around? Funny Penny moment! Semblance reveal? Cutesy chibi explanation! Need to do more sneaking? Silly coffee plan! Nora gets electrocuted? Joke about how awesome that was! Even Wiess telling Whitley to go to his room reads as funny to the audience.

Ruby in particular has been a problem, given that she’s our main character and the others’ leader. We take our emotional cues primarily from her. Alongside being a part of all these fun and games, her animation during more serious moments has been less than stellar. This is Penny when Nora goes down.

This is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. No worry, just focused on the fight.

This is Penny when the fight is over.

This is Ruby, Weiss, and Blake. No worry, just chatting about suspicious activity.

This is Penny in the airship, worrying about Nora and the situation they’re in. This is also Ruby in the airship, apparently not worried at all.

This is Ruby when she learns her uncle is in jail. Is there shock? Fear? Horror that he might be in serious trouble? No, she just maintains the same emotion she had before: fury at Harriet.

So when we reach them watching the recording and they look like this:

No, I’m not convinced that this trio is taking the situation seriously, or that they really care about the people involved. I know they’re supposed to care, they all obviously care from a meta perspective, but the “obviousness” of that only exists in our personal understanding of the characters if we don’t see it on screen. I completely believe that Penny is worried about Nora because she’s animated expressing that worry. I completely believe that JRY are in the middle of a warzone because they’re (mostly) animated as fearful and angry. The rest of Ruby’s team has a scared line from Blake and Weiss holding Nora’s hand, whereas the majority of the emotion across this adventure has been indifference or playfulness. That’s a problem given how horrible the events of this Volume have been, most of which the group is aware of. 

All of which is an incredibly long-winded way of saying that this

finally feels appropriate. Well done, RWBY. 

Alright, this recap is already over 7k long so I want to return to our plot with the summarized: IRONWOOD WAS RIGHT. He said they couldn’t withstand a head on attack by Salem and he was right. It literally took seconds for her grimm to burrow into Atlas, knock out a tower, and disable the shield. Everyone still claiming that leaving is useless because it’s oh so obvious Salem’s grimm could fly however high it wants (when did we learn that?) are ignoring that leaving was at least a plan with some kind of hope attached to it. And, given her focus on the Staff, may have saved Mantle by drawing Salem’s attention away from the city. The point is we don’t know. All we do know is that Ironwood tried to do something in the face of hopeless odds, Ruby’s team stopped him, and now look, everything is awful. No one could have possibly seen that coming. 

Salem: “It’s time.”

I’m very pleased that Salem is finally using the tools at her disposal. Upon reflection, I still don’t buy why she had to wait. “Well, she was waiting for the grimm goo.” She couldn’t have used flying grimm to take out the tower? Take a burrowing grimm and give it wings? She couldn’t have used the goo that was apparently inside her whale the whole time?

It’s all very convenient. In the sense that we’re drawing out the volume by having the villain inexplicably hang back, despite not having a good reason to. In the sense that—unless Ruby’s message comes back to bite her—the villain’s passivity also conveniently let the heroes accomplish the one goal they were desperate to achieve. All of that’s still not good, but at least the Volume seems to be moving out of the “not good” category and into the “slightly better” territory. 

Although, as I just acknowledged to a friend, RWBY seems to alternate for me. Every time I have an episode where I think, “Okay, there are still massive problems here, but I can see a glimmer of hope” the next episode is inevitably the pits. 

Still, grabbing onto that hope with both hands: Atlas should be decimated, folks! Grimm are swarming, our idiot heroes herded everyone directly under the city, the world should be panicking, and the cold should still be killing people if the story remembers that it exists. At this point my only question is wtf our heroes are supposed to do next, but regardless of what the plot gives us, it’s going to be wild. You all know what’s coming. Next week is our final episode before a two month hiatus, which means we’re going to witness all kinds of awful and then end on a six week cliffhanger. It’s inevitable, so best to emotionally prep for that now lol.

I don’t believe we have any Bingo updates, with the exception of edging towards a few: “Winter betrays Ironwood,” “Army of grimm conveniently doesn’t kill any civilians,” “Atlas somehow survives,” and “Ironwood dies” being the most notable. We’ll have to see what, if anything, gets checked off next Saturday.

As always, thank you so much for reading (I feel like I don’t say that enough :D) and I’ll see you next week! 💜

[Ko-Fi]

[sevenshoneybuddhachips]

Domestic hcs for the RFA?Like just how it is the live with them?grocery shopping,movie nights stuff like that?

OOO i love these kinds of hc !! thank you for sending this in !! im going to be doing different scenarios for each character, but if you want me to do a specific one for the characters then feel free to send another ask ! these just ended up being minifics akjnfskrjgnrk. might redo them later so that it’s actual headcanons ! that’s why i didn’t post it yesterday :( my bad

RFA domestic headcanons(?)

Warnings: - General Route/After Ending spoilers - Fluff Zen: - at the beginning when you guys first moved in together, it didn’t take long to notice that zen has barely anything in his fridge except beer - he apparently eats all his meals when he’s working ?? - you decide to go grocery shopping with him!! he doesn’t really want to, but he likes to hang out with you so he doesn’t put up a fight - steering him away from the beer aisle - eventually, you leave the store with the ingredients to make spaghetti !! - (zen picked it out, since he wanted to have a “romantic dinner with you”, lolol) - you start the cooking, and get zen to help out!! - he finds out that he really likes cooking ??? - chopping up the tomatoes is fun for him, and he likes to mix the pasta while it’s boiling - when you guys sit down and eat it together, his eyes light up ??? - he loves how it tastes, but more importantly, he loves that he helped you make it -  and that he’s having a “candlelight dinner” with the one he loves - he definitely tries to cook more, but he doesn’t really like doing it alone - “Ah, it doesn’t really feel the same without you, babe~” Yoosung: - just because he’s a vet, doesn’t mean he’s stopped playing video games - he’s given up on lolol though, after you nagged him about how bad it was for his health to pour so much time into it - alternatively though, he suggested another game for you two to play together !! - it’s a multiplayer game about living in a small town and owning a farm !! - for some reason he seemed super flustered abt playing it with you though?? - you’re just ????? confused - after all, it’s just farming, right? - it’s been a few weeks of playing it off and on at this point, and you get ready to log in - for some reason yoosung is tripping over his words a lot, and acting really... nervous? - you’re worried, but you figure maybe he needs the game to calm down??? - until he asks you to visit the beach in game - where he gives you ... a pendant? - you’re happy about it, of course, but you’re not really sure why yoosung was so flustered over it - until he tells you what it means - “With this item, um... you can marry people! So, I figured...” - Now it’s your turn to be flustered - how is he so cute???? - him getting this anxious over a video game marriage... how would he react in real life? - you get up and walk over to his desk, leaning over to kiss him on the head - “i do !” Jaehee: - Jaehee has always seen cleaning as just another chore to get done in her hectic, busy life - especially when she was still working for Jumin - while she valued keeping her house clean, it just wasn’t as important in comparison to her work ! - that changed whenever she opened the cafe with you, though. - now, she actually looks forward to cleaning up after work !! - you guys put on music you like jaehee usually puts on zen’s musicals and dance and sing as you clean up for the day - taking breaks to slow dance ???? taking breaks to slow dance. - admittedly, jaehee gets really flustered when she does dance with you so it doesn’t happen very often - when you’re done cleaning for the night, the both of you go upstairs to your apartment and just talk about your day and the things that you encountered - man i love jaehee Jumin: - as much as you love your husband, you do have one issue - he’s always busy :( - and while you know that you could get him to take time off by just asking, you haven’t even tried that as you know that would cause him trouble at work :(( - but one day, jumin decides to surprise you by staying home !! - he knows that you miss him, and honestly he probably misses you 10 times more he’s such a simp lmao -  he wants to have a “movie night” with you, as he’s curious to what it’s like??? - you put on one of your favorite shows/movies, scared that he wouldn’t like it - his face didn’t betray any particular emotion, and it seemed like he might be bored - afterwards, you ask him what he thought about it - he thinks about it for a moment, you leaning on his shoulder, heart pounding while waiting for his answer - “I liked it. You have good taste. I must say, some of the technical aspects were a bit laughable but...” - you breathed a sigh of relief - he was just being Jumin !! - With a smile, he reached over and brushed a stray hair out of your face - “Besides, I’m sure I’d like anything that you like, dear.” Seven: - there are a lot of things that seven feels guilty for - y’know, the things he put you through in the first 11 days he knew you - also the months after that - but one thing he feels especially guilty about is his house - i mean, for him living in a bunker is fine. he’s used to being isolated. - but for you? he can just tell that being in a place with industrial lighting and no windows almost 24/7 is draining - so, being the God Seven that he is, he comes up with a plan - it all started one night when he picked you up ~bridal style~ and Plopped you in the driver seat of his most beloved car - “You’re gonna have to trust me, okay? Put this on.” - he handed you a blindfold ????- immediately you were wary that this might be a prank, but you know that he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you so you decided to just go along with it - it was a nice car ride - for 30 minutes you guys were just listening to music and talking to each other about your days - abruptly, he pulls over - “We’re here,” he smiles, pulling the blindfold up off of your face - the first thing you see is his golden eyes looking into yours, before he swiftly breaks contact and exits the vehicle - you follow after, and look around to see- - “Whoa...” - the entire sky is full of stars- and, was that a meteor? - “Surprise!” He laughs - turns out he’d been planning this for awhile - AND he brought a picnic basket????- this night would be a night for you both to relax, and enjoy each others company

[sdvharveybby]

so i fell fast and hard for harvey, you know, as you do. i was wondering if i could request harvey and the farmer going to an aerobics class together? this man was so shy about it and it absolutely melts my heart 🥺�� thank you so much!!

OH bby anon do I understand! When I first watched that event I was like, “Oh you sweet man. So so precious!!” This ask is such a cute idea, thank you so much for sending it in! I never thought about this, personally, so I’m glad you sent it! 

I really enjoyed writing this, as well, but I’ll be honest... I’m not 100% confident about it? I certainly loved writing it, but if this isn’t up to your liking- I’m totally down with re-writing it. I don’t want anyone to feel major dissatisfaction with my work, you know? Let me know! I, originally, intended to do some headcannons (because thems are easy mode), but honestly- it fit a fic type better. Also, Zumba is crazy crazy fun- I did it in high school, and I had a blast! I felt like it fit the story and his event!

Regardless, inspiration with this was actually memories! I recently quit my martial arts class (due to health reasons), but the mood in this story is exactly how it was in my dojo! One time I was doing a Naeryeo-Chagi (also known as “axe kick”, but you bring your leg up as high as you can and with a flat foot you snap your leg down), I can kick pretty high, so when I kicked as high as I could I felt my other foot leave the ground and I fell FLAT on my butt. I was so stunned!! Eyes wide, all I could do was just laugh. Everyone thought it was funny and so did I! That stuff just happens- it’s hilarious!! I have so many wonderful memories in that class...

ANYWAYS- HOPE YOU ENJOYED THIS BBY. THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN. I feel your love with Harvey (the boy deserves all the love in the world!!) 

Word Count: 1572

An eventful day of hard work for the farmer, but luckily, they finished their chores early- hopefully to spend some time with Harvey. He always seemed to disappear on Tuesdays closer to noon and he never told the farmer why. It was perplexing, but he always carried a duffle bag with him and a look that bashfully avoided eye contact.

There he was, carrying his duffle bag as he made his way to town. Approaching him, the farmer stopped him in his tracks, “You like to disappear around this time,” they teased as Harvey looked away. “Y-Yeah well, you know… Heh, doctor… duties?” Harvey’s words didn’t sound convincing whatsoever, especially since he came home from work early because his patient rescheduled their check-up. “With a duffle bag?” The farmer further challenged, now crossing their arms and putting their weight on one leg. They gave him a cocky smile as he began to blush, “Okay, okay-“ He submitted as he held up a hand, “You caught me! I’m taking cooking classes with Gus!” Harvey tried looking into the farmers eyes as he said this, but it wasn’t for long. “Harvey, you’re already a great cook. Now, what are you really doing? I won’t make fun of you!” They assured him as they walked and pulled Harvey into a big hug. He gave a heavy sigh and scuffed the dirt with his shoe. “Heh, well… Uhm… I’m still taking those aerobics classes. It’s a bit embarrassing, but you know- you saw it before. Just trying to work on myself!” Harvey was bashful and quiet as he said this, but he reciprocated the hug. Once they pulled away the farmer bounced back with a smile that made his heart stop. “Great! Let’s go then. We don’t want to be late.” They walked away from him making their way to Pierre’s. Harvey stood, stunned at the farmers response but bounded after them yelling, “What do you mean ‘we’?!” “I’m coming with you, and you can’t stop me.” The farmer smiled to Harvey and he blushed once again, “You don’t have too. You must be tired after work and all- I can’t ask you too-“ The farmer stopped and faced him, they gave a jokingly annoyed look, “We can do this together, Harvey. It’ll be fun and maybe it’ll be less embarrassing for you. My cardio is bad,” They laughed, and Harvey gave them a soft and affectionate look, “Okay, but don’t get worried about me. Even if I say I can’t breathe- I can,” He laughed back, and they made there way to Pierre’s together deciding to hold hands as they did so.

Harvey was nervous about the farmer joining him- he wasn’t sure how they’d react. Towards himself or the class! He didn’t want the farmer to feel embarrassed or witness him messing up. Most of all- it was hard for Harvey to be social with the ladies in class and he didn’t want them to see him as stiff compared to everyone else.

Walking inside they saw Marnie, Robin and Emily already there. They all gave Harvey and the farmer warm smiles, “What do we have here?” Robin began as they put an arm around the farmer, “I decided that I’m joining today! My cardio sucks,” Robin laughed and whispered into their ear, “Don’t worry, mind does too.” Emily jumped up and clapped her hands together, “This is awesome! We have the cute duo joining us!” They all gave them an endearing welcome that made Harvey and the farmer blush, and after roughly 20min of chatting they all decided to get to work. The farmer looked around and watched everyone begin to pick their spots. “Today is actually Zumba class led by Caroline. You’ll love it- it’s really fun. She’ll teach you the dance moves to the song she chooses, and we just copy her,” Harvey remarked leaning towards the farmer. Now, this was all new territory for the farmer, but they were determined to have fun and get some exercise in. Harvey seemed confident so why couldn’t they?

The session lasted about an hour long, and it wasn’t until the farmer had sweat droplets running down their face that they realized how intensive these classes get. These women have to be power houses to get through this and still smile like it was nothing, the farmer thought as they hunched over breathing heavily. “You… You look tired,” a voice heaved behind them and as they looked, Harvey didn’t look any better. He had his hands on his knees and he closed his eyes trying to get his breath back. Sweat dripped off him as he brought up a hand towel and began wiping his face. “Please,” the farmer choked out as they smiled, “You look worse than I do,” they managed to finish as they laid down to relax a bit. “I blame the fact that I already did my farm work before this,” Harvey laughed as they said this and sat beside them holding a water bottle. “You did great! Isn’t it fun?” The farmer sat up and took his water bottle, they downed about half of it before responding, “I can’t believe how fun this is! Once you get the moves down it just flows. I felt so… powerful,” they laughed and gave Harvey a big smile. “Thanks for coming,” he admitted, “You being here, with me, actually helped a lot. I was pretty embarrassed being in a class full of women who have been doing this longer than I. They’re so strong and they can get through the whole class like it’s nothing- I felt so out of place.” The farmer gave him a friendly punch to his arm, “I’m coming back- this feels great! But wow, it also hurts.”

The walk home was slow, but it was filled with excitement from both the farmer and Harvey. “Honestly, it’s pretty admirable for you to go those classes,” They began as Harvey walked beside them- he kept his sweatband on and occasionally drank from his water bottle. “You think so?” He questioned wiping the excess water from his mouth. “Oh, yeah! You see Marnie? She can move, I was in awe. She knew everything and was so confident- it was kind of intimidating! I know what you mean about feeling out of place.” The farmer admitted and cracked their knuckles, “I’ll show her up next time though! Then she’ll be in awe!” Harvey laughed at that and watched them with admiration. The determination the farmer had to want to keep coming to the class eased his nerves and made him quite happy. It was something they could do together, something new to experience, and having a partner who was almost as out of shape as he was, was comforting. “Thanks for coming. Like I said, it helped out my confidence having you with me.” He didn’t look at them as he said, he looked forward as he walked, and he wore a small smile. “Oh, Harvey- you knew the moves too! You were so cool to watch, I mean, I didn’t know you could even move like that,” The farmer teased nudging him. He chuckled at that and offered the farmer the rest of his water through the walk home.

It had been a few months since they went to there first class together, and they had a blast! They both felt like they were getting stronger and with the farmer at his side Harvey worked like he never had before. He had someone he wanted to impress, and it gave him the motivation to keep working on himself and his health. Whenever they’d go to class together, they wore ear-to-ear smiles and it was filled with plenty of laughable moments, like the farmer using the jump rope. They weren’t bad at it, but the one time the rope wrapped around their ankle, tripping them, and they hit the ground face first. Harvey was of course worried but was relieved when the farmer rolled over roaring with laughter. He then, of course, joined the laughter while he helped them stand. Or the time that Harvey was lifting his weights- he pulled one up with enough force that he accidentally let go and it flew! When it hit the ground (making a loud BANG) he blushed madly as Pierre bolted in the room and began lecturing everyone in the class. Nobody could hide their smiles and giggles when Pierre grew red with anger, “You better not break anything! This isn’t some stomping ground!!” Course Robin was the first to break as she fell out in laughter, keeling over as soon as Pierre left the room. Harvey no longer felt out of place in the aerobics class, and he constantly thanked the farmer for that. He realized that he was more embarrassed about possibly messing up than just accepting that moments like that just happen and he began to laugh whenever something silly happened to him. Whenever someone tripped or dropped something he learned to laugh (when they did) and not immediately assume something was wrong. He learned that the most from how many times the farmer tripped, fell, scrapped something, dropped something and instead of feeling embarrassed or nervous, they just laughed. Everyone else did too!

Looking back, Harvey was extremely grateful for having the farmer at his side. He never expected this to happen, but he was happy that it did!

[lassieposting]

Hey, I saw you did a hc thing for Scaracen/Dexter and I was wondering if you could do one for Ghastly/Skulduggery?? (I love the pairing but there is no content and it makes me sad) Hope you are having a good time :)

I genuinely thought I had done this for ghasdug but apparently not? I can't find it anyway

There is content in my ghasdug tag but tbh in my experience the ghasdug shippers are on discord mostly...hit me up

ANYWAY

So. Ghasdug. Ghastly wants skug from the start.

They're 16 when they meet. Ghastly gets a bit seasick and doesn't really want to go anywhere by ship, but his mama tells him he needs to, there's something important for him on that ship, that one right there, and he trusts her enough to know that she's clearly foreseen something and to just go with it.

By the time they get back to shore, he's already thinking, it's you. I was supposed to meet you.

They head back to Dublin together. Ghastly's mama takes one look at this awkward, skinny, skittish child and decides she's adopting him, and skug moves into their farmhouse and is subsequently freaked the fuck out by his very first experience of A Loving Family. Ghastly's mother like, hugs him and reminds him to wear a coat and clips his ear for swearing and makes sure he eats breakfast. He is semiferal and not used to any of this.

For a few months they settle into a comfortable routine:

- Ghastly's father spends the week making clothes, then does commission deliveries one day and takes hats and boots and suchlike to the market the next.

- Ghastly's mother has a job as a barmaid, where she gets to regularly crack some skulls and socialise, which is great for her because she is both a short-n-stocky powerhouse and a giant extrovert.

- The boys spend most of their time together, and they're supposed to do the bulk of the chores. It's not a large commercial farm - they have a vegetable garden, and some chickens, and an old carthorse, and maybe a couple of goats or a cow for milk and cheese. Ghastly and Skug are supposed to cut firewood and feed the animals and fetch groceries from the market and milk the milkable animal and fix this and repair that. All the things the parents dont have time for

Which. Is great in theory but skug has never had to do a hard day's work in his lazy aristocratic life, and develops a severe and immediate allergy to manual labour, so actually ghastly tends to do most of the chores while skug skives off and naps in the sun or chats up the girls who live on the neighbouring smallholding over the fence

And like, therein lies the problem, because they are both solidly in the grip of that cruel mistress called puberty and like. Skug was a fuckin weird-looking child. He had big ears and a sharp nose and a bunch of missing teeth and his limbs were all too long for him. But he's now rapidly growing into all the features that made him an unfortunate child, and it's already clear that he's going to be one of those people who will, inevitably, grow into handsome young men.

Which is like. Fine. Ghastly doesn't care. He's not jealous or anything. He doesn't feel a twinge when the neighbour girls only speak to him to ask about Skulduggery. Nobody here is bitter.

It's a good thing, he tells himself. Nobody will want to marry him anyway, so he's glad skug is around now so Mother can harass him to meet a nice girl and give her grandchildren. At least someone will probably want to have children with skug.

He has a dream about skug not long before his 17th. They share the attic room, and when he startles awake, skug is smirking at him from the opposite bed and asking "who is she?" and ghastly thinks oh no. He's painfully embarrassed and awkward about it, and skug rolls over and stretches and says, "relax, bespoke, your secret is safe with me" and all ghastly can focus on is that he's actually been putting some muscle on lately and when he stretches like that it does funny things to ghastly's insides.

- they start riding into town in the evenings to meet up with hopeless at the tavern, play cards and flirt with pretty girls. Or rather, skug flirts with pretty girls. He's all legs and freckles and elegant clothes, and they hang off his every word. Ghastly knows they will never look at him like that. He's Skulduggery's ugly friend. Girls only approach him to ask about skug

- and he gets it! Skug is unfairly attractive! And he's witty, and clever, and sometimes when ghastly wakes up first he stays very quiet so he can watch skug sleep, the way the dawn turns his hair to burnished copper, the way his curls fall across his forehead and the patterns his freckles make on his skin. Skug is an affectionate, tactile drunk, and hopeless looks at ghastly with something like pity whenever skug rests his chin on ghastly's shoulder or leans his head on ghastly's knee or wants a piggyback back to where they tied the horse, and ghastly takes what little he can get and says nothing.

- they're coming home drunk in the pouring rain one night, later than usual, riding doubled up on ghastly's carthorse. ghastly is behind, loosely holding on around skug's waist, and the whole way home all he can think about is how close they are and how much he wants to lean in and put his mouth on skug's neck, and by halfway home he's reduced to silently begging his semi not to pop a full on hard-on until they're home, when skug will crash like always and ghastly can take care of himself in private

- when they get home, they're locked out, which is what they get for coming home well after ghastly's parents are asleep, but this isn't a one off and ghastly's mother always leaves blankets for them to sleep in the barn. so they put the horse away and give her a rub-down/groom together and skug's shirt is practically see-through and his hair is plastered to his skull and ghastly can't take his eyes off the visible jut of collarbone where the neck of skug's shirt is undone and skug makes a couple jokes about it when their eyes meet, how ghastly has been brushing the same bit of horse for as long as it's taken skug to do half his side, but then the third time he laughs and teases, "if i didn't know better, bespoke, I'd say you wanted me" and ghastly will forever blame the alcohol but he doesn't even think about it? It comes out before he can stop himself, before he has time to remember what it could do to their friendship

- he says, "what if i did?"

- skug goes quiet for a minute, and it's a tense sort of quiet, not the thick, cloying tension that comes before a storm or an argument but the light, vibrating tension that comes with standing on a cliff's edge or drawing a bowstring, and then he ducks under the horse's head to come around to ghastly's side. He's still a little shorter than ghastly, still has to look up ever so slightly to meet his eyes.

- skug says, "do you?" like it's still half a joke, and there's a chance to back out right there, to laugh and deny it and let this become an amusing footnote at the bottom of their friendship, but ghastly ignores it. "yes."

- skug shrugs, his lip quirking, and says, "so have me."

- ghastly learns a lot that night. he also accidentally blurts "i love you" when he comes, but nobody's perfect and he's...relatively...sure skug was too distracted to have been paying attention, so he'll count that as a massive win

- morning finds them in the hayloft, tangled up in the blankets left out for them, regretting their choice of tavern beverages and, in ghastly's case, sporting a classic case of morning wood. He's kind of hoping he'll get lucky again with sleepy morning sex but skug is disgustingly hungover and just wants to burrow his head into ghastly's chest to block out the light and go back to sleep so like, out of luck.

- when skug has slept off the booze a bit more, Ghastly awkwardly broaches the question of "just how drunk were you" and they establish that they both remember fucking, neither of them regrets it, and the attraction is apparently mutual? Which is a mindfuck for self-conscious teenage ghastly, because, like, why tho

- they both get to do the walk of shame into the house when ghastly's parents wake up. Ghastly's shirt hides the nail marks skug left on his back nicely; sadly, the same cannot be said for the giant hickey he left on skug's throat, and he is eternally grateful to his parents for not bringing it up (he'll allow his mother her raised eyebrows. She did it quietly)

- they just sort of? happen, after that. There's no conversation about what they are to one another, so there are several crossed wires and feelings get hurt, but they always move past it. They both have phases of going off with someone else - but they keep ending up back together regardless of how much they argue.