#she sounds so small when she says

[capsizedskeleton]

i okay. the thing about athena is she sounds so much more mortal this saga. the oooh i pushed you too hard and the you're a good kid, not to mention how pleading she is in all of god games. she's acknowledged her faults and how she has a second chance. how she can give that to odysseus. fuckkkkkk it reminds me of how people have historically liked greek gods because of their humanness, their fallible and fickle nature. athena is more human because of her ability to grow

[a-whispering-echo]

band! doodles

have some random drawings i collected up and put on one canvas and finished up because i need storage space <3

[faaun]

pls i need to provide updates

[amelikos]

Nyarote being stabbed in the stomach by Basagiri's Rock Axe while she was about to launch her move, and still ferociously holding on and attacking anyway was so cool of her. Such a good moment.

[nieranddear]

Rereading the dialog that is said during suppressions. Abel specifically says 'Loved Ones' as he speaks about those in the upper layer's demise and their struggle and urging to stop as continuing on is futile. Abram says 'colleagues'. 'Coworkers'. He does refer to them as 'Friends' once as well. But every other dialog is about Carmen or generalizing and saying 'everyone' rather than specifics. It just feels odd a bit to where he uses less strong terms when referring to relations with people and then afterwards only refers to Carmen by name rather than those still existing beside him. Even when it was stated by a facet of A and others (I can only remember Hokma off the top of my head. It may be only him which would make sense) refer to A having seen them as specifically 'Loved Ones'. Which is a far stronger showing and expression of emotion to those around you.

It makes me think of how he, Abram, expressed his desires, the desire to die [see: 'sink'/'sleep' for he explicitly refers to death consistently as slumber and when bringing the dead back 'waking them up'] and stop, in that moment. He constantly brings up, in general terms, self punishment and Carmen. Guilt that is carried with Carmen. Memories of her death, her passing. Of how she left without a smile. Of how she can no longer bask in the warmth of the sun she loved to do so frequently. Yet only of Carmen in name. Never anyone else or specifics of people, generalizations when referring to others and referring to them all inside a group, as a collective. Them and then Carmen. Focused on only that. On the fact he cannot move forward. Urging to just shut the eyes and to simply Sink. To Sleep. To die. It reminds me of when one goes ahead and becomes so interlaced with suffering and grief and despair that one simply stews inside of it, spiraling down further into that single train of thought. Holding onto the image of a dead and deceased one. It feels as if, in a more crude way of saying it as I cannot formulate a different way currrently at the moment, searching of 'justification' and a fitting reason to commit suicide. [I say Justification as what I really mean to say a 'fitting reason', that reason and end seeming to Be the Only way to continue, or lack of continue, at that point to him.] Rather than saying the names or specifics of those around him, of his loved ones still inside those metal boxes, he becomes enveloped in grief and only on Carmen. Abram's mistake which he fixates the most upon. Holds deep guilt for. Blames himself for. Saying he drove her to her death. That he is leaving her behind [I didnt save the exact quote but it was generally that]. When those inside the facility are people he also so clearly values and wished to bring back as well he, at this moment, primarily focuses on Carmen. Even when he does address the others it's in a more brief manner, having two pieces of dialog on the Sephirot specifically and it only relating to his Faults relating to them than the people themself when he speaks of Carmen in a more in depth manner. Perhaps it's still the wish clinging of to not hold trust in anyone. But it feels reminiscent to when a person tries to push themself and gain 'courage' to commit suicide. Of focusing only on the guilt and regret and the mourning of one already gone, who was so near and dear whom he did all of this for in the first place his desire only stemming from her and not the project itself, especially one who also killed herself, to go ahead and die as well. Perhaps it's not even an active thing he does in his mind. It's just become so overbearing that he has now gotten stuck in that never ending loop. Using far more stronger language of the woman dead and gone who he wishes to rejoin than of those currently alive and near to him, making them feel far more distant than they actually are mentally – at least in relations and connections wise. Depression does tend to tear down what one feels towards their loved ones and how they process and view relationships causing for people to exhibit such a thing by feeling distant in a room or alone with a loved one nearby as commonly known – and physically. I'm not saying that's 'totally what it is' or the sort. More of that reading it over again just reminded me of such a thing. Nothing revolutionary but more ramblings to process it all after it ended

[britishchick09]

welcome fern :)

[britneyshakespeare]

barnes and noble has been raising the prices of everything and further pushing for their premium membership option (which they raised the price of by 60 percent this year!) and then when they have big sales events, they're less than what they used to be.

last year at this time you could get one of their leather-bound book annex tomes for $12.50 (without a member discount) because of the 50 percent off all hardcover sales. but they raised the price of those tomes from 25 bucks to 30, and they decreased the sale from 50 percent off all hardcovers to 1/3rd off. so that same book that was $12.50 at last year's end-of-year sale is now 20 bucks. and that's supposed to be savings enough to induce me to walk into one of their stores this week?

i'm sorry but b&n has just gotten so greedy, even though their business has only been doing better and better in previous years. they do not have to be raising prices like they have been, and they can damn well afford to have the same savings events they used to. if you went to one of those hardcover sales a year or two ago, even if you lived in a less populated area like i do, you had never seen a b&n so busy in your life. things were flying off the shelves. they WERE making bank.

and as a company they've only been growing and growing (as much as the publishing industry has been, in recent years). but there are so many other ways to buy books. CHEAPER ways to buy books. MORE SUSTAINABLE ways to buy books. and since books and booksellers are doing really well right now, i don't see why barnes and noble is getting so greedy when they don't have to be. i dont like new shiny books that much. people buy books for the content, ultimately. sometimes we as consumers might make the choice that a new shiny book is worth paying a bit more for, but not that much. barnes and noble has just been demanding more and more of their customers' money for less and less benefit.

[itspileofgoodthings]

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[leatherbookmark]

Randomly thinking about my sense of humour and how it comes off irl. Well and online too now that I think of it because online I suppose it's even harder to tell whether someone's joking or not. Specifically I think with the way I talk? Because like. I must've said multiple times that I write the way I talk (and talk the way I write, my voice is the exact same), and the way I talk is that very often when I'm trying to be humorous I'll just adapt a tone that I think is OBVIOUSLY not genuine (a villainous drawl or a slightly nervous bright titter), something so "this is me playing a role for your amusement" that I don't stop for a second to consider whether it landed or not.

(I'm also someone who picks up/gets attached to specific phrases, tones of voice or basically "ways of speaking" a lot and uses it for humorous purposes -- for example, little phrases like "such is/is such that", "but however", "alas!" that I feel are at this point (see, another thing: the word order) a part of the tumblr familect (?), this way of speaking in a quasi-archaic, quasi-elevated style about things that are very mundane just to be funny. That's my jam.)

And I feel like with my father it usually did? Because our senses of humour were very similar, but my mother's sense of humour is like... it's not good fellas... and the typical scenario between us is I'll say something sarcastically, she replies seriously, I, pained, go "that was a joke" to which she replies that of course she knows! But I know she's lying. And I guess she's a special case, but I've had several other-people-cases where I thought I was saying that was obvious sarcasm/doing a bit, but the other person reacted as though they took me seriously. Like, I don't know, something is fubar, I go "oh, wahoo! how lovely!" v e r y dryly and someone goes "well um I don't think that's good actually".

But it's rather difficult to figure out whether the other person understands you in terms of like, the message you're trying to convey; figuring out if they picked up on the nuances of tone and sarcasm is much more difficult, especially if you give of a Weird Vibe. :/

[mostardently]

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[angered-box]

honest to god this is about to be what's going to happennext tuesday for my art instructor. sorry you aren't getting shit from me

[hephaestuscrew]

The amount of platonic love and tenderness in Michael's farewell letter to Louisa is off the charts. And one of the signs of that love is the kind of focus Michael places on small mundane things about Louisa. Like the detail with which he describes the ways she laughs: "your short little laugh. Not quite a bark, but a shift so sudden that it has to be genuine. [...] So real, never forced. No melody to it, really, but still musical. Sometimes short and guttural. Sometimes a cackle, like notes going up a scale". Michael describes Louisa's laughter in such a specific way that shows the attention he pays to her and the way he holds her ordinary mannerisms in his mind. He doesn't describe her laugh with the kind of typical compliments that could be seen as generic - it's so clear that these descriptions are specific to Louisa and his memories of her, and there's so much love in that specificity. 

Then there's the story of Michael bringing whiskey back from the kitchen without even realising, and the way he remembers Louisa's expression when she noticed: "everything, everything I needed to know was there, every freckle and contour. There was no judgment. Your face was open, your eyes soft and understanding, your mouth bent into the smallest knowing grin, your expression just barely pinched, just a touch of pain". There's something so profound to me about the level of attention he pays to the details of her expression, and how those small signals communicated something important between them without words.

These are two characters whose relationship has been repeatedly confirmed to be purely platonic (and remaining platonic) both within the podcast and by the show creators. It means so much to me that as part of that platonic dynamic, Michael pays such close loving attention to Louisa, and he remembers these ordinary details even when he's dying and hasn't seen her in months, and he says things like "your face, I could fall into it, like it was a calm lake or a pool. I could fall into it and float."

[amomentpassed]

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[heloflor]

It just hit me that we're getting a game where the main protagonist is called "Peach" and the main antagonist is called "Grape".

Is...is that why Nintendo called her that ? Because fruit ?

(Granted it probably sounds better in Japanese if that's her name there as well)

[saudebazi]

<3

[thoughtfulseason]

i have to comfort myself that after the toughest times comes the best cause these past few days it’s been so awful, it’s like everyone’s out to get me and i’m just so tired of everything