#she posted something on her twitter and i wanted the details so i messaged her this morning and i did indeed get the tea

[darkmoonkestrel]

daily kestrel 87:

Thanksgiving with Paige's family was great! Sav had to go to work early this morning so we stopped by Starbies on our way to her parent's house to see her and then we hung out there for a while with her parents and Zane, watching the parade and doing food prep/packing/cleaning. mom & dad went to pick up the rest of the stuff that they ordered for catering, and we hung out with Zane for the tail end of the parade and talked about his plans for the future, which apparently include cinematography, so that was cool

Paige and I got ready and headed to Mamaw's, and it was an absolutely beautiful drive. her cousins were already there, and we chilled there for a while and watched the dog show while Mom and Mamaw did more cooking/prep and dad looked at the house inspection report. Paige and I took the pre-thanksgiving dinner smoking (vaping) walk, the parents made mimosas in the middle of the day, Lily and I played Mario Kart and then walked outside to watch her brother & dad play football and talked some, she's a pretty great kid

we headed over to the fellowship hall of the church and Lily set up her bracelet making kit, I joined her and made a PPJ bracelet, and then it was food time. we had plenty of amazing food, including several bomb ass desserts and some of Nathan's dad's homemade BBQ sauce (even though that BBQ didn't need it) - the only thing the dinner was missing was deviled eggs, and Paige said she may make me some this week bc I was really looking forward to them, so that will satisfy the hole in my heart. overall a much better thanksgiving than last year, although I still missed my family and Peyton

Paige and I played spot the Christmas lights on the way to stop by her parent's house to move the VHS tapes into the guest room and let the dogs outside, and then we got on the road home. I've been to Bucees entirely too much in the last week or so, but I got another icee and mamba sours and some more of the spicy crackers. we were able to take the expressway home, and listened to another ep of Distractible between conversations about high school grievances with teachers and peers, and now we are safely home with the car unloaded and Peyton's to go plate (and Brunswick stew and grape salad) in the fridge. Paige got the storage unit rented, and we may go by tomorrow to take a few things and get them out of the way before Nathan comes on Sunday to help us move some of the bigger furniture. Peyton will be coming home tomorrow morning, so it will be a packing day of extreme proportions

[neferaskingdom]

♡ My Favourite Person | CL16

PART OF MY IS IT CASUAL NOW? SERIES

Summary: And as much as she wanted to ignore it, she knew that what she felt for him had become more than casual.

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT

The morning light was barely creeping into the room when she woke up, still nestled in Charles’ arms. His breathing was soft and steady, his face nuzzled into her neck. She’d almost forgotten how they’d ended up here—wrapped up in each other after a night of celebrations that neither of them seemed eager to end.

But her peaceful morning was interrupted by her phone vibrating almost nonstop on the bedside table. She groaned softly, trying to ignore it, but the constant buzzing wasn’t easy to ignore.

Careful not to wake Charles, she leaned over and grabbed her phone, only to see her group chat blowing up with notifications.

Friend 2: "Morning, mystery girlfriend. Saw the video. Care to explain all those face kisses?"

Friend 1: "So… how was your night? 😏 Don’t leave out any details."

Friend 2: "Did he put that winning energy to good use? Just saying, he looked like he had a lot to celebrate."

Friend 3: "Saw the videos. You guys definitely looked like ‘just friends’… in an alternate universe maybe."

She stifled a laugh, her cheeks heating up as she scrolled through their messages. Her friends were relentless.

Friend 1: "Are you still in his bed right now? Girl. Spill!"

Friend 2: "If I were you, I wouldn’t even be checking my phone right now. Priorities, babe."

Friend 1: "Okay, so… are you going to tell us what’s going on with you and Charles?"

Friend 2: "Girl, don’t even try to pretend! We all saw the videos."

Friend 3: "Face kisses? All over?? That doesn’t look like ‘just friends’ to me."

Friend 3: "Not to mention that ‘just friends’ don’t exactly spend the night… 😏"

She sighed, knowing they wouldn’t let it go easily. Her friends had always been relentless, especially when it came to her love life—or lack of one. She typed back a quick response.

You: "It’s not like that. Seriously. We’re just friends."

Friend 1: "Oh, just friends? Because he was all over you, and everyone saw it!"

Friend 2: "Exactly! There’s literally a thread online about how ‘in love’ Charles looked hugging you. It’s adorable."

Her cheeks flushed as she read through their messages, her stomach doing a tiny flip at the memory of Charles’ face lighting up when he’d found her in the crowd after his victory. The way he’d pulled her close, practically sweeping her off her feet, felt like a vivid, joyful blur. It had been so natural, so… right. She pushed the thought away and took a steadying breath. 

You: "No, really. He’s just… He’s just like that. He’s affectionate with everyone."

Friend 3: "Uh-huh. So why is the entire internet convinced he’s madly in love with you?"

A link popped up in the chat, and she clicked on it reluctantly. It led to a popular Twitter thread, where dozens of fans were posting clips from the day before. The first video showed Charles wrapping her in a tight hug at the barriers, his face beaming as he peppered her with kisses. She hadn’t even realized it looked that intense. But there, on the screen, it seemed undeniably intimate. They looked like they were in their own world.

You:“Come on, guys, He was just celebrating. It was a big moment.”

 she typed, trying to brush it off

Friend 1: "A big moment where he couldn’t take his eyes off you. Sure, we’ll believe that. 🙄"

Friend 2: "Have you even seen how everyone’s reacting? They’re calling you ‘Charles’ mystery girl.’ People are actually dying to know who you are."

The messages kept rolling in, and every one of her friends had something to say. She glanced at the thread again, scrolling through the comments.

Fan 1: "Did you guys see the way he looked at her? I’m deceased."

Fan 2: "Who is she, and where did she come from? Because they are TOO cute together."

Fan 3: "Charles Leclerc just won in Monaco and went straight to his girl like it was the last lap of his life."

The more she read, the more she could see why people might think there was something between them. She and Charles looked… cozy. Her cheeks warmed as she replayed their moment in her head. She couldn’t deny that the two of them together, lost in the celebration, had felt almost surreal.

But then, she shook her head, dismissing the thought. Charles was just excited. It didn’t mean anything.

You: "You guys are seriously reading too much into this. He’s just a friend. Nothing more."

Friend 3: "Right. Just friends who look at each other like they’re the only people on earth."

Friend 2: "Just friends who also happen to be practically plastered all over each other. You’re not fooling anyone."

She let out a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose. She hadn’t expected things to spiral like this. Her friends’ teasing was relentless, and while part of her found it amusing, another part couldn’t shake the flicker of doubt that crept in.

Could there be more between her and Charles? They’d been spending so much time together, and he did seem unusually attentive, even when he was halfway around the world. She couldn’t deny the closeness they shared, but… dating? They weren’t dating.

But when she glanced back at the video, seeing the unfiltered joy in Charles’ eyes as he hugged her, she couldn’t help but think… maybe there was something there. Just maybe.

But she wouldn’t let herself dwell on it for long. Not with her friends gleefully piling on the teasing.

You: "Okay, okay! Enough! It’s nothing serious. Just a friend who won a race and got excited. End of story."

Her friends sent back a flood of laughing emojis, followed by a slew of more questions, but she simply set her phone down, laughing to herself. 

“What’s so funny?” Charles mumbled, his voice still thick with sleep as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer. His hair was a mess, sticking up in every direction, and his pout was almost enough to make her laugh again. He nestled his face into her shoulder, his breath warm against her skin. “I’m literally right here, and you’re laughing at your phone.”

She grinned, scrolling through one last message. “Are you seriously jealous of my friends right now? I’m in bed with you, remember?”

He let out a dramatic sigh, shifting closer until she could feel his lips just grazing her neck. “But you’re not laughing with me,” he complained, a whiny edge to his voice that only made him sound more endearing. “I want all your attention, not just some of it.”

“Oh, poor Charles,” she teased, lowering her phone to look at him, her eyes sparkling with amusement. “It must be so difficult being this needy first thing in the morning.”

“Needy?” he huffed, narrowing his eyes at her, though his lips quirked with a playful glint. “You make me this way, you know. It’s not fair.”

She poked his cheek, unable to stop smiling. “How tragic. Do you want me to make it up to you?”

“Maybe,” he murmured, his eyes brightening. He reached over, snatching her phone and tossing it to the far side of the bed. With a grin, he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her down and pinning her against the sheets. “No more distractions,” he declared, his tone playful but his gaze warm and intent.

“Charles!” She squirmed, laughing as he tightened his hold, a smug grin spreading across his face.

“Say I’m your favorite,” he insisted, his voice taking on that stubborn, whiny edge.

“Not a chance,” she managed, her laughter spilling over as she tried to wiggle free.

He only raised an eyebrow, smirking as he started tickling her sides. “Then I’ll just have to keep this up.”

“Alright, alright!” she gasped, breathless with laughter. “You’re my favorite!”

He grinned triumphantly, loosening his hold but keeping her close. “See? Was that so hard?”

She rolled her eyes, still catching her breath. “You’re insufferable.”

“You love it,” he whispered, his face just inches from hers, eyes shining with affection.

“Maybe,” she admitted softly, reaching up to trace a finger along his jaw.

Without another word, he leaned in, capturing her lips in a slow, gentle kiss that melted away any lingering teasing. His hand slipped to her cheek, his thumb brushing her skin as he deepened the kiss, warmth and affection replacing all the playfulness from a moment before.

When they finally pulled apart, he pressed his forehead to hers, a soft smile tugging at his lips. “Now, that’s how you start a morning,” he murmured.

She chuckled, her fingers playing with his messy hair. “You’re way too pleased with yourself, you know that?”

He grinned, pulling her even closer. “Just happy to have you here.”

After Charles left for his next round of races, life in Monaco settled back into its usual rhythm. The mornings felt quieter without him there to pull her back into bed, and her evenings held a little less warmth without his familiar presence beside her. Still, she filled her days with work, nights with friends, and tried not to think too hard about how easily she missed him.

Charles, however, was determined to make his absence less noticeable. His texts came in constantly—quick messages about his day, random pictures from the track, and even the occasional food pic with captions like, Would be better if you were here to share it.

He called often too, squeezing her into his schedule no matter how busy he was, even if just to say a quick goodnight. But sometimes, especially late at night, his voice would soften over the phone.

“I miss having you around, you know,” he’d say, a hint of a sigh slipping through. “Got so used to having you in my bed, it feels weird to sleep alone now.”

She’d laugh, leaning back in her own bed, wishing he were there to say it in person. “Is that so?” she’d tease, although his words always made her heart flutter a little.

“Yes, it’s terrible,” he said one evening, his voice warm and familiar in her ear. “I’ve been lying here, missing everything about you—your smile, that cute little laugh, even the way you take up half the bed.”

“Excuse me? I do not take up half the bed,” she protested, grinning to herself.

“Oh, you absolutely do. And you’re a pillow thief, by the way,” he shot back playfully.

“Pillow thief?” she scoffed, a laugh slipping out. “I’m pretty sure you’re the one who steals all the blankets. How many times did I wake up freezing because of you?”

“Okay, maybe that happened… once or twice,” he admitted, chuckling. “But you didn’t mind, did you? You’d just scoot closer.”

“Maybe,” she replied softly, feeling a warmth spread through her. “Guess you’ll just have to keep missing me then.”

He chuckled, the sound low and full of affection. “I don’t like it,” he murmured. “I think about it way too much, actually… how much I miss having you here.”

The conversations always left her smiling, wrapped in a warmth that kept her thoughts drifting back to him more often than she cared to admit. But every so often, reality would remind her what this was supposed to be—light and casual, no expectations or promises. She tried to keep that in mind, even when he’d text her goodnight with a little heart emoji or send her random selfies, always making sure to stay connected in a way that seemed more than just casual.

One afternoon, scrolling through her social media, she stumbled upon a clip from Charles’s latest interview. Her curiosity piqued, she clicked on it, smiling to herself as she settled into the couch.

The interviewer was smiling, a teasing glint in her eyes. “So, Charles,” she began, leaning in conspiratorially, “there’s been a lot of talk about this mysterious someone you’ve been spending time with in Monaco. Is there a new girlfriend in your life? Will she be at the next race?”

At the mention of girlfriend, her heart skipped, a quiet, hopeful anticipation rising within her. She watched Charles’s reaction closely, waiting to see what he would say.

Charles chuckled, brushing off the question with an easy smile. “Oh, no, nothing like that,” he said lightly. “She’s just a really close friend.”

She blinked, feeling her heart sink just a little. The words just a friend echoed in her mind, leaving a faint sting that she hadn’t expected. She took a steadying breath, reminding herself not to read into it. After all, they’d never defined what they were, and she knew he didn’t mean to hurt her. They’d both agreed to keep things casual, to take it day by day without complicating things.

But as she replayed the clip, she couldn’t deny the tiny pang of disappointment gnawing at her. She tried to brush it off, telling herself she was being silly—after all, they hadn’t talked about being exclusive, and they’d never put a label on whatever this was between them. She hadn’t even thought she wanted one until now, but his words left her feeling strangely empty.

Later that night, as she lay in bed, she tried to shake off the ache. When he called, his usual cheerful voice greeted her, and she did her best to sound normal, even though the thought of just a friend lingered at the back of her mind.

“Hey, you,” he said warmly. “What’s my favorite person up to?”

She bit her lip, feeling the familiar warmth of his words soothe some of her unease. “Oh, you know,” she replied, trying to keep her tone light. “Just laying here, missing my favorite blanket thief.”

He chuckled. “Ah, so you finally admit it—I am your favorite.”

“Don’t get too cocky,” she shot back playfully, though there was a softness in her voice. “I still haven’t forgiven you for stealing my blankets.”

“Is that right?” he said, his voice dropping to a teasing murmur. “Guess I’ll just have to come back and make it up to you.”

She felt her heart skip a beat, imagining him back here with her. “Hmm, that sounds promising,” she teased, though her words held an honesty she hadn’t intended to let slip.

He paused, his voice softening. “I do miss you, you know. life just isn’t the same without you.”

His words tugged at her heart, leaving her conflicted all over again. She wanted to believe he felt the same way she did, but his casual dismissal earlier had planted a seed of doubt, one that made her wonder if she was letting herself fall for someone who wasn’t ready to catch her.

As they continued talking, she found herself drifting back to his earlier words in the interview, that easy laugh as he brushed off their connection as something platonic. And even though she tried to push it away, a small part of her couldn’t help but wish he’d called her more than just a friend.

When their call ended, she lay in the darkness, staring at the ceiling, her mind a tangled mess of emotions. She tried to remind herself that they were both free to come and go as they pleased, that neither of them had promised anything more than companionship and a little fun. But her heart had other ideas, leaving her to wrestle with the unsettling feeling that she was beginning to care far more than she should.

And as much as she wanted to ignore it, she knew that what she felt for him had become more than casual.

[causenessus]

cold kisses

part 0.3. USER 7193

PLAYING FROM KODZUKEN'S STREAM . . . feels by calvin harris

maybe he should have expected this. 

nearly all of his posts have been overrun with questions about y/n in the comments. the comments range from simple “who was the girl in your cooking stream??” demands to extremely specific ones detailing her exact hair color, height, and voice pitch as if he’s had another mysterious girl on a stream that he’ll confuse her for.

he’s been doing his best to avoid questions about her but it could only work for so long. now there’s only questions about y/n left in the chat and he’s not sure what to do. it was easy to ignore the questions when he wasn’t doing an entire question and answer live stream but he’d promised to do one soon and he thought having shoyo with him was going to help. 

it did for the most part, and everything seemed normal but he was at a loss for words when the chat started to flood with questions about y/n.

shoyo leaned closer to read a question outloud, “‘girl from the cooking stream?’ i keep seeing that, do they not know–”

a reflex kicks in and he slaps a hand over shoyo’s mouth, pushing him away from the screen again before removing his hand trying to act normal.

the ginger looks at him, a mix of surprise and confusion on his face. “sorry,” kenma apologizes quickly, shocked by his own actions. “no, they don’t know anything about her,” he answers, trying to make it clear that he wants to keep it that way.

but the chat is already too far gone, using this one mention to run wild with theories. he can’t blame them, really. sometimes they’re a little over the top and unnecessarily pushy as if they have no sense of respect but in this scenario what else could they talk about besides a mysterious person that just entered the picture? but that didn't mean he enjoyed dealing with it.

messages transition quickly from asking what they “don’t know about” to inferring that he has a secret girlfriend. he groans, looking away from the screen. his mind working fast to try and come up with an excuse or explanation; a single mention of her and they already think he’s dating someone. he’s sure that the internet would go crazy with this information as well, fabricating stories, scandals, and everything in between.

his phone starts to buzz.

speak of the devil.

it’s a notification from twitter, some unofficial update account that’s tagged him about having a secret girlfriend.

he needs to think.

he can see shoyo eyeing him out of the corner of his eyes and he knows he’s been silent for too long on camera.

god, someone was going to find out who she was soon, right? weren’t fans supposed to be good at doxxing each other?

but how does he play off being roommates with an olympic athlete? an olympic athlete whose currently being shipped to the max with the most typical copy and paste guy everyone has the hots for?

maybe it’d be better for him to leave it to a random fan to find out who she is and announce it to the world–no, then he’ll just look bad for hiding things after so much has already come to light. it’s best for him to come up with an excuse right now. if he said she was his girlfriend maybe he could ask them to leave her alone. maybe they’d listen to him.

it sounded like his best option but he couldn’t just make that decision on his own without talking to her.

but he also couldn’t stand up and the leave the room for an unprecedented amount of time after keeping quiet for so long.

he looks at the chat one more time, seeing the word girlfriend in nearly every message. if they already think they’re dating it can’t be that bad, right?

“kenma…?” shoyo breaks him out of a trance, touching him on the back.

kenma looks at him, unsure of what to say. he feels dizzy and his mind won’t stop whirring with thoughts and worries.

“you’ve been really quiet,” shoyo lowers his voice so that only kenma can hear him, “i think you need to say something.”

he glances at the chat again. still stuff about y/n.

she’d be okay with it, right? maybe if she isn’t he’ll just tell twitter that his girlfriend broke up with him because his fans are pushy little shits and he’ll agree with her word for word and then his fans will cancel him and he can move to another country and live a happy little life working in a cat shelter–

no. he likes his life the way it is now. he’s winged everything so far but he’s grown quite a small community for himself this way. he can do this. if y/n doesn’t agree, he’ll figure something out later.

“okay,” kenma finally speaks, dropping his hands that he’s been running through his hair absentmindedly. “since none of you guys are gonna leave this alone, yes. the girl from that last stream is my girlfriend, happy?” he watches his chat run wild with numerous exclamations. he thinks finally about his poor moderators. he’ll definitely have to give them something after this stream. “i’ve been trying to lay low about it because i didn’t want the world to freak out but now it’s out. just try and be respectful, okay? i love her a lot.” the words aren’t hard to say when they’re about her. he can say them honestly and play them off as a joke later, but for now he enjoys how nice it feels to say it.

he can see that shoyo has frozen up out of the corner of his eye. he needs to end this stream before either of them say something else they shouldn’t. he’ll answer a few more questions and slowly ease into a goodbye so that he can end the stream and debrief shoyo.

prev. | m.list | next

extras <3

this is a long chapter i'm sorry 💀 literally there's more but i tried to split this evenly into two chapters

kenma was literally just going through some random person's account who made edits of ice skating partners to self sabotage himself

yn wasn't sure when they'd be releasing partner pair ups and really freaked out when they were announced

she was texting everyone and tweeting a ton

she messaged her media girl like "hey i'm not comfortable with people sending me writing shipping me with atsumu can we please do something about it" and the girl replied, "what do you want me to do?? report them?? write you a message that you can tweet about your boundaries?? (yes) if that's what they want to write deal with it at least they like u"

and they wonder why she just posts whatever she's feeling on her main unless iwa tells her otherwise

noya has gotten distracted from the main topic of a chat to reply with a <3 to something nice y/n says multiple times

they're fr just best buds holding hand in the middle of a warzone where iwaizumi reigns over all

(the only two soldiers are suna and tsukishima)

suna's a lot softer without tsukishima around

he just feels like he needs his guard up around such a salty person

do not ask me why i made rofltropper an antagonist for no reason

kageyama was really just trying to finally do his english homework while waiting for hinata to come home and then he heard kuroo and oikawa start to yell

he was a little scared but then was like "if they can't reach me i'm safe" and they they slammed the door shut and his room shook a little

someone on the floor probably wrote up a complaint about them

taglist: @rinheartshyunlix @kettlepop @eggyrocks @cr4yolaas @httpakkeiji @keioover @does-directions @calx-bdo @staygoldsquatchling02 @cherrypieyourface @iluv-ace @kitty-m30w @h3xi2g0n3 @mylahrins @thechaosoflonging @momoriii-i @localgaytrainwreck @a-pastel-edgelord @bugglesboop @polish-cereal @osakis-gf @whykirbo @phoenix-eclipses @faesix @ryeyeyer @starxq.zip @skylarkalchemist @kunimix @sereniteav @kodzubaby (form to be added to taglist! <3)

[venusmage]

Commission/Life update for 2024

EDIT 4/30/25

Progress is still happening! I've finished several large orders since the last update. As always, feel free to reach out to me with concerns and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. I'll be taking May 2025 off completely from coms as I'm finishing the school semester. Thankfully I'm not taking summer classes THIS year so commissions work will start again on June 1st.

The best days to reach me are Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at the moment. Otherwise it might take me a day or so to get back to you. I work on my own projects on the weekends to preserve my sanity, lol! Just know if I'm drawing something else, I haven't forgotten my queue!

------

Original post:

Just want everyone to know I AM okay now and life has gotten better recently. However the past year and a half have been extremely difficult and I'm only now getting back on my feet. I generally don't like sharing life details publicly, but as a freelancer with clients that have been waiting for a while I feel like transparency is key.

If you don't want an explanation for the delays and just want to know my completion timeline, that's totally okay. Here is all the info up front. I'm going to continue updating my commission queue as usual and will not be accepting any more orders until ALL of the queue is completed. I'm working on finishing the half and full bodies first since they've been the longest waiting in queue. Then the rest. I don't have a set date in mind for when they'll be all done for good but the goal is by the end of the year. I think that's more than doable for me now. If you're a client of mine and have questions/concerns, please message me either here or on Discord and I'll do my best to help you. My username on discord is the same as my Tumblr username. Twitter and Ko-Fi are also options but I don't check them as frequently. I usually work Monday-Thursday so that will be the best time to shoot me a message or expect an update to the queue.

Information on what's been going on is below.

CW for mentions of death, financial hardship and homophobia.

As a few of you might remember, in 2019 I was disowned by my mother for being a lesbian. I made the choice to go no-contact. Since then, up until LAST YEAR, she's routinely harassed me or had other family harass me, stalked me on social media, tried to get to me through the website I take commission orders, and threatened me multiple times. I was forced to move across the country both because I felt unsafe and because my partner had family elsewhere that were more accepting. I've had to change my phone number twice.

It's been extremely difficult both financially and mentally to keep my head above water. In 2021 my grandfather died and I still haven't felt like I've been able to properly grieve. I wasn't able to see him due to her and I wasn't invited to his funeral. We were very close and he meant the world to me. In 2023 my grandmother passed away very suddenly as well, and my mother used it as an excuse to harass me over ko-fi/my professional email. It was such a horrific experience that I fell into a months long spiral that I only just now feel like I'm climbing out of. This is when commissions first stalled. I was also starting to get overwhelmed, as I had to take on more work than I could realistically handle in order to pay bills and rent. That's really it - I just had to take more orders so we weren't kicked out of our apartment, and as my mental state deteriorated I couldn't keep up.

The good news is that my wife and moved earlier this year we're living with supportive(!) family now and our financial burden is much lighter. This gives me time to work on my backlog without re-opening. I'm also going to school again, back in college starting this summer for a second degree. For my own health after commissions are finished I'm likely going to take a break on opening them for a good while, even though I really enjoy doing them.

In the past two months amazing and not-amazing things have happened. The amazing thing is I got an ADHD diagnosis, something I didn't even know had been ruining my life for years. I'm still getting used to the proper medications but I'm already seeing a big improvement. It's as much of a relief as it is frustrating. My mother also reared her head again (like she usually does at least once a year) - this time, though, I learned she'd had a stroke. While I'm not involved with her anymore, I think most people could understand how it would still be a very weird and upsetting situation. As of right now I'm free of her once again, she seems to be making a good recovery and will hopefully continue to live a happy life far away from me. Still, those two things back to back have been a LOT to deal with on top of just trying to get better in general. I stepped away from the internet for a while for my own sanity.

The downside to being a freelancer is that there's not always a safety net. That's what happened to me. Thank you all very much for being kind and patient, I genuinely have had nothing but polite interactions with all of you and I really appreciate it. I'm sorry my personal bullshit got in the way of getting my work done for you. This is the longest I've ever taken to complete commissions and it's something that I'm deeply ashamed of. I promise they will get done. Being medicated and starting to recover from the family drama has revitalized me a bit. If you have any questions or concerns please reach out.

[glittering-snowfall]

I'll always love this comic:

In 2020, I reblogged it and commented:

I knew the artist to be a kind, caring person who shipped multiple pairings in the fandom and I knew firsthand how Elsanna shippers have been harassed. I'd been harassed by anti-Elsanna people myself and it always, always hurt.

A few days later I posted this on my other blog, detailing my experiences as a multishipper in the Frozen fandom. As you can see, this was a deeply personal post that talked about the way I had been treated by different people at the time.

But a "friend" of mine who shipped KA did not like that I made that post, and made sure she told me why:

I tried to explain to her that I did not make my "My experience as a multishipper" post to demonize KA. To anyone reading this now, look at the post. I've linked it. I talked about the kind people I had met in the KA ship, and I told her this:

I also defended the artist's comic:

Which, again, LOOK at the comic. That IS what it says.

But my KA-shipping "friend" didn't care how earnestly I was trying to explain that I wasn't villainizing KA shippers, and didn't care as I defended the comic:

For the record, I have been personally harassed by anti-EA KA shippers. In fact, I had been various times before this conversation with her. She knew this, so her acting like a KA shipper would never mock or belittle an EA shipper is... what planet are you from?

I sensed from her snippy tone ("So I'll make a comic about elsanna shippers, what shall I accuse them of?") that she was incensed - and I got scared. I wanted to calm her.

She made me feel I'd done something wrong - even though she knew I shipped KA alongside her, knew I'd defended her and her friends in the past. But it didn't matter how often I'd "proven myself" to her. If I did the "wrong thing," she'd make sure I'd know it and feel guilty for it.

So I contacted the artist, who I must emphasize one of the sweetest, kindest people I've known in the fandom. They told me the comic was based on their personal experience of being harassed on twitter, and that they were venting.

I relayed this information back to my "friend" and this was her response:

Here's the kicker. Long before I reblogged that comic, this KA-shipping "friend" made a post herself. It looked like this:

Tell me, years after the fact, whose post was more "needlessly incendiary?" The comic, whose message was, "Good for you? you ship what you want and I'll ship what I want, live and let live?" Or her post that used an ask about another ship to flare up a ship war?

I feel like the answer is obvious, but... God... the years I spent struggling to "prove my worth" to a "friend" who never really trusted me or even seemed to like me still hurts to think of. The time she spent talking in circles to me and making me feel like I'd done something wrong.

I spent years thinking I was just... overly-anxious all the time... but I was on edge because people like her put me on edge. Any time I said something she felt was "wrong," she'd be in my messages and I had to defend myself, explain myself, be scared my defenses wouldn't be enough for her.

I should have realized sooner that nothing would be enough for her, but again, she preyed on my naïve belief that she was acting in good faith when... she wasn't. And made me feel like I was in the wrong.

So I guess the reason I'm making a public post years after the fact is... I need other people to see what I went through. I need other people to confirm, "She was behaving irrationally, not you," "She was preying on your insecurities," "She was 'needlessly incendiary' herself."

[honeyhotteoks]

heyyy love your fics but it’s a lot of yunho can you write a fic for san- a college au where he and y/n meet at a party but she’s his tutor and she doesn’t normally go to parties?? and she gets like sick a lot because alcohol doesn’t agree with her and like san sees that and helps her? and maybe they hang out in her room after or something?? thank you!!!!!!

hi! i don’t normally respond to asks like this anymore, so i don’t mean to single you out, but i’ve gotten a lot of requests like this recently and just wanted to make a few things clear, as well as direct everyone to my pinned post and my new faq post.

i do not take requests, and i don’t plan to ever take requests again. i really don’t have the time and i also don’t really love the way writing requests makes me feel, so while i appreciate that people really want more from me or a specific scenario i really don’t have the ability to give that.

that being said…. i do have a serious problem with messages like this and while i like to keep my blog pretty relaxed and free of negativity, i think i need to say this……..

if you are a reader of fan fiction, you should not request a fic to a writer who doesn’t openly and explicitly encourage you to make requests. it’s weird and it’s really, really presumptuous, and it’s really disrespectful of my time and the energy i put into my writing. it’s totally fine to send a message where you tell a writer you think they might be great at writing xyz genre or scenario or ask if they’ve ever thought about xyz genre or scenario, but something like this is not cool. i get a lot of messages like these, and since ateez has gotten a big crop of new fans and i’ve gotten a lot of new readers, i’m getting messages like this at least once or twice a week. i can tell you that it doesn’t make me want to write at all, let alone write for the member you requested or the scenario you requested. it also honestly also feels like people are sending me details about them/their real life and asking me to write them as a character, and i find this really rude. if you want to see a scenario represented that you don’t see, write it yourself.

anyways a lot of you already know this, but truly this is terrible fic reading etiquette. i’m not a machine that can write on command, and saying you love someone’s work “but” is weird and genuinely rude.

okay thanks that’s it, check my faq for more details and this is the last request i’ll be responding to via inbox, message, twitter dm, etc. etc.

[bylrlve]

Warning! Potential leaks for season five of Stranger Things!

Alex (aka @dyersfilms on twitter, used to be swiftlynatalia) is the person who successfully leaked most of season 4 due to her knowing a source. She did, however, insist Byler was entirely platonic that season and they fought for most of it and only made up at the end in the pizza van, so…

Here’s her saying she won’t post any byler leaks this time around, which she has said previously.

She got a message saying they’re all fake, and she thinks they all are, so keep that in mind.

Here’s a short one: Will distancing himself from the party bc it’s too hard to be closeted and to be around Mike. If real? Endgame fr.

A ‘leak’ from episode one where shit goes down after the opening scene of Will singing SISOSIG, Will falls, and Mike helps him up,

Here’s an extremely detailed one that casually drops Mileven breakup, Robin-Mike bonding over Vickie and Will, Will trying to avoid Mike ‘confronting him about the painting’, Mike and Jonathan fighting over Will’s safety. Nothing here is debunkable but…. Yeah. God, would it be nice, though.

The two most interesting ones. First, an ask that’s almost entirely plausible except for the mileven part - and that part, specifically, I’m calling bullshit on bc it claims that Hopper is still on the Mike Hate Train. It was made abundantly clear, after their talk and their awkwardly long hug at the end of season 4, that that’s in the past. Besides, it just wouldn’t fit tonally. S3 was the heterosexual-cliché, silly filler season. S5? Nah. Can’t 100% say it’s fake, but even Alex agrees this one isn’t real.

Lastly, an interesting one that’s plausible throughout which claims Mike gets seriously injured and spends some time in hospital. Will stays by his bedside after everyone else leaves and kisses Mike on the forehead. Mike wakes up after he leaves - I think the insinuation is that Mike does a Half-Blood Prince and wakes up knowing that someone he felt safe with was there, but he doesn’t know who it was. If that’s legit? As I said, endgame fr.

I do want to note that both the mileven and Byler asks word the ‘main character getting injured part’ as everyone being ‘shaken up’ so there are a few options: it’s the same person with legit leaks, and Byler isn’t endgame. That, I’d be more willing to accept, cautious as I am, were it not for the Hopper part, which sticks out like a sore thumb. Second option: it’s the same person messing around. Third: it’s two people, one building on the other.

Cannot emphasise enough that these are most likely just bored people having fun, but I figured I’d share them all. The last one is getting passed around the tag sans context, and I wanted to clarify everything else Alex has received. Do not get your hopes up about Byler based solely on these.

Letting my imagination run absolutely wild here for just a moment, however: Maya and Vickie are confirmed to be filming at the hospital set, presumably visiting someone. There’s also a pic of someone with bloody shoes. Imagine if Robin visits Mike in the hospital, witnesses some Platinum-Tier Will Byers Pining™️, and ends up talking to Mike after he wakes up - no mention of how long he stays there.

Lastly, it is fun comparing these to the more doom-and-gloom (re: Mike) leaks Sapphicjopper on twitter got. The awesome @solgmorell has a post explaining those in detail.

Oh, and an interview came out today where Shawn Levy said something insane but, you know, water is wet.

[dtupdates-archive]

♡—DREAM posted on Twitter. Transcript under the cut.

“-stuff from last year-

Thousands of likes on this is crazy. Using a 10 second clip to purposefully spread misinformation and lie is so disgustingly vile. I did not “admit to doing horrible things”, at all, literally the exact opposite happened. Here’s summarized context for those that want to see what was actually said;

“No one was groomed. She lied about taking legal action, she lied about providing more proof later, and lied about almost everything that was shared. It’s been over a year since she said she would provide proof. I have and will be releasing the Snapchat data, Instagram logs, twitter history, and timeline, which proves by a matter of fact that she deleted certain messages, lied and hid context, and that she never provided these easily obtainable logs because they contradicted some of her own words.

I primarily used Snapchat as a messaging platform before I revealed my face because I was hiding what I looked like and everything else about my life IRL. I had many people from online games & content creation on it, and used it for everything, so I didn’t look at Snapchat as a big deal. I changed my mind on that before this even happened and made a private Snapchat for close friends.

Her story contradicts itself many times. with her saying that we planned a local meet up, while I was faceless and would literally leave the state just to go to the dentist, and hadn’t shown my face to even my best friends yet. with her liking and replying to tweets of mine and defending me from criticism, only a week before she posted about how horrible I was. with her not posting a single screenshot, video, log, or ANY BIT of evidence of anything that she claimed, other than that we had friendly conversation. With her DMing me from her IRL Instagram, with no fan posts and only her real life info, deleting posts, and actively hiding that she was currently a big parasocial fan.

On top of that, she had something in her bio insinuating that she was an adult, so I had no reason to even think about her age. Nothing inappropriate happened so I wasn’t looking into whether she was 17.9, 18, or 30. It doesn’t even matter if she wasn’t an adult, because we were just having short friendly conversation, she wasn’t groomed, and we weren’t even friends. I even (provably) tried deleting her from my Instagram inbox multiple times but Instagram doesn’t let you unless you block someone.

I did not reply in detail publicly (besides denying the accusation immediately) at first, due to waiting on her claim that she was taking legal action & providing more proof, and advice from a lawyer. She never did either. I did not lash out publicly in frustration, because I had to be very careful and think about how my response could impact future victims willingness to come forward against an abuser. I’ll be going into more organized detail later in a video on one of my channels, with far more than this, and just uploading all of everything for anyone to go through. but there’s a lot to say and it’s a delicate thing to talk about in general.””

[etheluu]

Burned

🔗 Render credits here

A vent render about an experience of mine. I wanted to make it for literal weeks now but never felt strong enough mentally to actually do so. Finally though, I actually made it and I'm proud of it and I actually feel better mentally because of it.

I'm gonna talk about the experiences that this render represents under the cut. TWs are in the tags.

Wooo, okayyy time for some heavy topics.

If you know me from Twitter, you might remember that I once posted a render with a message how my ex was a pedophile. If not, here it is anyway:

This post doesn't represent the whole situation in a perfect manner so I apologize for that. I did (and still kind of do) want to remake it, write about it better and find better evidence from what I still have. Although this topic, even 2 years later, is still hard for me to talk about it, especially in greater details.

Either way, yeah, basically I was groomed by my now ex and the trauma lives on.

Back in around the summer of 2023, I attented therapy meeting that made me realize what my ex did to me. I also talked to my friends about this whole ordeal, which helped me to cope with it better. If I didn't actually open up to them about it all, I might have not even realized that I was groomed so I'm forever thankful to them.

And ever since then, I was just at mercy of the trauma that came out of this experience. It's not pleasant.

I haven't really found any way to cope with it all nor found any good outlet for all these emotions. If keeping things to myself was a job, I'd have a pretty stable income and could live comfortably on my own. Although from time to time, I'll make a render to express my feelings somehow, just like this one.

Honestly I was inspired to make it from a post I saw some time ago on tumblr. I can't find it now but it went something like this:

I was freezing and you were a fire. I knew that your flames would hurt me but warmth is warmth either way.

And it resonated with me and my experiences. I was a naive teen who wanted some affection, no matter who it was from. So then I found myself in this situation, where I'm scared/don't want to say no because either I was scared that she'd leave me, therefore I would lose the only source of affection/emotional support/whatever, or I just didn't see anything wrong with her actions at the time.

I remember just zoning out during her having her fun with me (iykyk) when I just wanted to go to sleep. It happened way more than just one time.

Man, I was living in absolute denial about my actual feelings during that relationship. But at least I'm out of it and can slowly heal.

Wish I could say something more about this topic but yeah. Got groomed and now I'm traumatized. But I'm living on, even with that baggage. I'm coping with humor so if you ever see me address this as my character/lore development, then that's the reason.

Also I'm posting this partially because I don't want her actions to be forgotten. I'm petty about it but if I'm being harrased by the consequences of her actions, so does she will be. She's a pedophile forever in my eyes now and I won't be afraid to say it anymore.

[gayfesh]

You’re a terrible person for defending Poppy to her boss about the client name leak. How would you feel if that happened to you? The fact that you didn’t say anything about it until now is disgusting. If you and Poppy didn’t get into a fight, you would be defending her disgusting behavior to this day. GTFOH. Seriously, who stays friends with someone who said their kid is “dead to them”. WTF is wrong with you.

Let's clear up what I meant by "defending."

Poppy had written a letter to a client's parents making a case that the trans genocide is happening or on the cusp of happening, and she was so proud of this letter she wanted to share it with details anonymized. She caught everything, except a single instance of the client's first name. She posted it in a Twitter group chat I run.

Twitter doesn't let you delete DMs. "Deleting" them only hides it for you. So this letter with her client's name was available to see for every single member of the group chat. Initially, she was asking every single member of the GC to delete that message for themselves, and take a screenshot of that section of the GC to prove that they no longer saw it. But not everyone was quick on responding, and her boss was going to have to file a report for breach of confidentiality or something.

So I ended up using my alt account to boot everyone out of the GC (you can only kick people out by blocking them) and then remade the GC, ensuring that the old GC's chat history was dead and gone and that image was now inaccessible to everyone. In so doing, her boss decided that such a report was no longer necessary.

I don't know what else you would have wanted me to "say anything about" that situation at the time.

And yeah, I do share a lot of blame for enabling Poppy for so long and turning a blind eye to her worse behaviors, and yeah, I do deserve criticism for that. That's part of the reason I have been so vocal in my criticism of her now. Initially when I ended the friendship I did not intend to say anything publicly, but I couldn't sleep for four days because of the guilt. I need to work to undo what I helped cause.

But our friendship didn't end solely because of a personal affront to me. It ended because I saw her going down a horrible spiral where she didn't care who she hurt along the way. You can say "if we didn't get in a fight I'd still be defending her," but that fight was inevitable. If that fight didn't happen, it'd be because she improved her behavior, which would have been a good thing.

[doom-dreaming]

Do you think cortana posted chief for national girlfriends day on the unsc's version of Twitter (he didnt even know about it until weeks later)

It had been nearly two weeks by this point and it only seemed to be gaining momentum. Groups of S-IVs would try to hide their snickering as they passed him in the halls. Whispering Marines would quickly shush each other when he walked into the room. He noticed the sidelong glances, the elbows jabbed into ribs, all the little movements that weren't as subtle as they thought. He'd even caught Roland and Captain Lasky in the middle of a hushed but heated conversation that he, apparently, didn't have the clearance for.

This had been normal when he was still a new fixture on Infinity, but several years had smoothed the edges off his reputation - at least enough that people could relax around him. Or so he thought. A backslide like this was...unexpected. And it wasn't even necessarily the principle of being left out of something that had started to bother him, it was more the fact that everyone seemed to be in on something he wasn't. And that it seemed to be about him.

"Mm, kind of rude," was all Cortana had muttered when he'd brought it up a few days prior. She'd been distracted, deep in the middle of analyzing something for Halsey, and he didn't think much of the dismissal at the time.

But by now, the strange conspiratorial energy aboard the ship had all the trademarks of a bomb about to go off and it was making him antsy in a way he didn't appreciate. "Cortana."

It takes a fraction of a second longer than usual for her projection to appear on the holodeck - a detail imperceptible and inconsequential to anyone but him - but she's bright-eyed and smiling as she materializes. "You rang?"

"You have to know something." He cuts right to the chase.

She sighs. "Chief, you know they put me on restricted access. I don't like it either, but I have to play nice. It's Roland's ship, if you want to know what he sees, ask him."

John narrows his eyes. He didn't believe her for a second. And she knew it.

She holds eye contact as her lips twitch into a barely-contained smirk. "Maybe there's something going around on the socials," she continues with a shrug. "Could be worth a look if it's really bothering you."

**********

The suggestion was still sitting in the back of his mind days later, unheeded. He had more important things to be doing than trawling through message boards trying to find a joke that no one had bothered to let him in on. It always felt like tuning into an unsecured comm. channel - lots of chatter with very little substance.

But he knew Cortana. And she was up to something. Besides, he had a few hours to kill before Commander Palmer needed him in the simulation room. He taps his way into his account, remembering his password with a combination of muscle memory and sheer luck. His inbox is overflowing with messages, but he opts to ignore them in favor of hunting down the threads with the heaviest, most recent traffic.

A thread simply titled 'Girlfriend Day' rises to the top of the list. His finger hesitates over it for a second, unsure if this was the lead he should be following. It seemed unlikely, but none of the other contenders had anywhere near the same engagement numbers... Resigning himself to a potential dead end and waste of time, he opens it.

The initial post is a picture of a young couple, both smiling. The man has his arm around the woman's shoulders. They're somewhere sunny, in civilian clothes. John doesn't recognize either of them and doesn't spend much time skimming the accompanying text before moving on.

He doesn't have to go far. Less than a dozen posts into the thread, he finds a photo of himself. It's not a bad photo, all things considered - it's a nice candid shot, he's cleaning a gun, his helmet sits on the bench beside him - but the rose-tinged filter and tiny pink hearts aren't doing it any favors. It'd been posted anonymously without a caption and he only has to read a few of the comments underneath it for things to start falling into place.

"Cortana..."

The holodeck glows a dim blue for three full seconds before she appears, hands on hips, eyebrows raised.

John silently tilts the screen toward her.

"Do you like it? I thought the hearts were a nice touch."

"Pink's not my color."

"Agree to disagree." She settles into a more relaxed stance. "Who knew one picture could get the ship buzzing like this? Infinity's starving for gossip, apparently."

"Everyone wants to know whose girlfriend I am," John sighs, finally setting the datapad down. "Where'd you get the picture?"

"Took it myself. Last month. It was hard picking a favorite, you know. I went through a lot of them."

"...how many do you have?"

"Oh, thousands. I don't show them to anyone. Well, aside from this one exception." She nods toward the datapad, then crosses her arms in response to the face he can feel himself making. "What, a girl can't have a hobby?"

[endy-x]

ArtFight Recap (3)

Recap 1 / Recap 2 I thought I'd go and post my attacks from artfight that I did, I had a ton of fun this year, I'm going to post them in batches because there is a lot and I do not have the energy to make an individual post for all of them

If you want me to remove you from this list, or add or remove any links in any way just message me and I will!

Im going to put a keep reading here because there is a lot of stuff here so I dont want to block your feed if you're not interested

Attack 61 was Agnes Willowbee for @maydaymadier I am super proud of how she turned out, she was the first character after a couple days of artblock so she got a couple days worth of effort put into her and I think I can confidently say that it shows

Attack 62 was Leniss for @kr4shz This character looks really cool and I'm happy with how it turned out

Attack 63 was William for LinFan [Twitter @LinFan1590 Instagram linfan159] I am super happy with how this one turned out , the overlaying images took a lot of fiddling for me to be happy with but I'm really proud of how this turned out

Attack 64 was Dewi for @lilybug-02 I've been reading the comic this lil guy features in so stumbling upon him on artfight was a good excuse to draw him

Attack 65 was Jimbo for @simplysanders A very fun looking guy who was a joy to draw

Attack 66 was Sanquo for Emilykun [deviantART EmilykunRocks] I loved the character design and the hand resting on the horn was really fun to draw

Attack 67 was No name for EightBitAutumn [deviantART JinxTheBlissfulBunny] I really loved that character design

Attack 68 was Nova (ISAT) for @laciedoesdraw I love seeing ISAT characters and Nova was super fun to draw

Attack 69 was Beatríz for @shushetho777 Another adorable character as a revenge

Attack 70 was Nuray for @ixabits I hope I did her justice because shes so pretty

Attack 71 was ♡♡♡ Devil's Rose for @leafy-lilac I am super happy with the half and half and it worked really well with the really cool characcter

Attack 72 was Gwyidion for @shinibobo Another really cool character design that I hope I did justice

Attack 73 was Holly - Empiral Blue Pearl for Pomdough A really cool character with a very pretty design

Attack 74 was Iri for TaffySnow There were so many colours and I loved drawing this

Attack 75 was Phoenix for macaronimissile She has a super pretty refrence and I think I managed to draw her super pretty too

Attack 76 was Umbra for Snaz_uwu The reference was super Majestic but I think I did pretty well

Attack 77 was [⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️] Ozzie for Lycanrosie [deviantART Lycanrosie Twitter Lycanrosie_ Instagram sierrarosie.art] I love how I did the lineless for this, Im very proud of it

Attack 78 was Bia for hinareks [Instagram hinareks] I am very happy with this art and I had a great reference to work with

Attack 79 was Mona Lisa for @zeawesomeness I really like how this one turned out, the two versions staring at eachother is something I am really proud of

Attack 80 was Ghost for User_Kara [Twitter User_Kara Instagram entity_kara] This is a really cool looking character, I dont think the amount of detail I managed did it justice but I think I did well regardless

Attack 81 was Forlorn for throat A really fun looking character, unique animal characters are always cool

And Finally, attack 82 was Jubilee Maples for @dqrshrtck A really pretty character that I drew with just over 10 minutes left of artfight

[remy2fang]

I wrote about this on Twitter, but I might as well post it here too and elaborate.

M. Bison’s hat is in the new SF6 Ed stage and it’s missing the golden Shadaloo emblem. It’s because F.A.N.G took it and wore it as a necklace. For those who read the Feb 2018 three-parter story TOXICITY, it’s been stated that F.A.N.G wanted to revive Shadaloo and M. Bison, in which he thinks the former leader of the organization is not truly dead. He tried to find resources to fund his efforts. Fast forward to late September 2023, F.A.N.G’s plan still tracks as seen from A.K.I.’s arcade mode and by talking to NPC “FANG” Fei in World Tour. F.A.N.G wearing M. Bison’s emblem around his neck is a reminder that he has a purpose to fulfill.

Now you might notice something different with the emblem between the two F.A.N.G illustrations, even though both are supposed to depict the same time frame where F.A.N.G first met A.K.I.. The 2018 version has the emblem clearly drawn with the Shadaloo skull and wing (I don’t know where the other wing went). The 2023 version from the A.K.I. memory art, although highly detailed, the emblem looked simplified. The necklace doesn’t look like a Shadaloo emblem anymore. It only has a vague shape of it. I only noticed this after seeing this gorgeous A.K.I. and F.A.N.G fanart back in the beginning of December of last year:

https://twitter.com/yoooou_know_who/status/1730868640214561227?s=46&t=iEGeYIIN_aP028wRnoVcUQ

I take it that the fanartist probably used the A.K.I. memory as reference to draw F.A.N.G. I don’t know if the artist read the Toxicity story. Most people didn’t read it anyway considering how many people thought F.A.N.G died until the A.K.I. dlc dropped.

Anyway, there are some conjectures why the 2023 version is like this. Maybe the artist just wanted to simplify the shape of the emblem because “so and so” reasons, maybe laziness, despite the entire artwork being super detailed in everything else. Another reason could be that they retcon the emblem and have F.A.N.G wear something else.

What do I think? I think the art direction of the 2023 illustration wanted to obscure the image of the emblem because they don’t want to give everything away story wise, which seems most effective towards those who never read Toxicity. The devs probably wanted to save more storytelling for later. That is why in the base game we don’t hear much about Rashid, A.K.I., Ed, nor Akuma, because that’s a story to tell when these characters come out. And from the sounds from the A.K.I. dlc, not everything has been said about F.A.N.G either. A.K.I. didn’t mention about her master’s Nguuhao dagger even though is was written to be a big deal in the Toxicity story. She didn’t even mention about Shadaloo nor Bison in her memories…that is until the avatar has to do a mission for her because she got a message from FANG to look into Shadaloo. Still, she never said Bison’s name. She seems to view these things as tasks for the job. Hmm…it might be no wonder that the emblem looked blurred. All A.K.I. could think of is her life story and F.A.N.G lol. But F.A.N.G for sure likes Bison and OG Shadaloo.

With the reveal of this new stage, it gave people hope that Bison and/or Seth might return in SF6. I don’t doubt that. There are indications for their return and it’s great that people are excited for it.

For me, when I saw Bison’s hat without the Shadaloo insignia, it all comes full circle from the F.A.N.G-centric Toxicity story. F.A.N.G indeed took it and wore it around his neck. It’s only a matter of time when either he or someone else explains about the missing insignia. Because of Bison’s hat on the stage, I now have Sign #14 that F.A.N.G might return playable lololol.

Now let me pour more of my running thoughts here. I have a feeling that F.A.N.G had something to do with the ruined Shadaloo lab. He must’ve placed Bison’s hat on the chair after taking the insignia. The lab equipment seems to be working too. Remember, F.A.N.G was trying to fund the revival project as mentioned in Toxicity. I think this is the result of it.

Sure, it could be someone else who placed Bison’s hat on the chair, but I don’t know who else is as passionate about Bison and Shadaloo other than F.A.N.G himself. Balrog only cares about money and even worked for the Illuminati during SFV. Vega doesn’t seem to care about Shadaloo either and Sagat doesn’t want anything to do with the organization anymore. The Dolls are free and want to live ordinary lives. There are some Shadaloo henchmen that are loyal to Bison from one of Rashid’s missions. Since these lackeys were targeting Rashid, they might be affiliated with F.A.N.G because he’s the one character who has a major grudge against him…but who knows, they might be JP’s allies instead. Though, one could say that Juri Han might’ve set the entire thing up. Revive Bison and finally enacting revenge against him. She always wanted that anyway lol.

[that-one-depressed-author]

I can’t really believe that I’m posting this at…

*checks time*

1:47 AM!

But, I’m tired of being silent and now have the motivation and energy to come forward!

I’m here to share my experience with Melody (yanderelmk)!

Let it be known that I could not write, draw, or even look at myself in the mirror after this happened for a good month!

Hello, everyone! Those of you from the Yandere!LMK Discord Server may remember me as Goat! In this post, I will be discussing my experience with the server and its owner, Melody. I want to go ahead and tell you all to not bother Melody or her blog, instead, go straight for the block button. This post is just meant to be a cautionary tale and hopefully provide insight and validation to those she is near or has hurt.

Here's a bit of context to the events leading up to my ban from Melody’s server. I had been stalking Melody’s blog for a little bit before I joined the server, and when I saw the Shauna situation, I felt like I needed to respond. I also have extreme bipolar disorder and ADHD, and even I didn't respond the way Shauna did. So, after making an anon emoji combination for Melody’s blog, I joined the server.

When I joined, I was a social anxiety-ridden mess, but I was welcomed with open arms. My own trauma from past friend groups clouded the already well-hidden red flags. Looking back, I noticed some things.

I noticed that when I first joined the server, everything I sent (drawings, writings, character-inspired makeup, etc.) was showered with love and praise. But the longer I was there, it slowed to a stop. Meanwhile, everyone who was close to Melody and in her inner circle got most of the attention and praise. I may be petty, but I am not jealous.

I noticed that Melody did little to talk about people causing problems and simply watched from the side. When someone was saying that their character would unalive mine because I shipped mine with the same character, Melody said nothing to stop it in the channel. But, later during a private call, she admitted she was watching it happen and didn't know whether or not to step in. As the server owner, she and her moderators should try and keep the peace when she sees something wrong.

And finally, I noticed that Melody had a bad habit of bringing up things that happened somewhere else where they didn't need to be brought up. Which leads me to my next topic: the events leading up to and the reason for my ban.

A little while before my ban, someone (I don’t remember who) had sent some Twitter fan art of the LMK characters as FNAF animatronics. And we all reacted positively, a few of us including myself talking about making it an AU.

So, Melody hosted a role play. I had used one of my OCs for this little role play, mainly her human design. We went for a few hours and when we had to stop, it was six in the morning.

Now, I had not slept for the past two days and was ready to pass out on my couch after a few after-role-play messages. I believe we had started talking about what our OCs would be like in a FNAF!AU and I had brought up one of my ocs whom I made with a group of friends and was the embodiment of lust.

Someone had mentioned and compared my OC to Asmodeus, the biblical king of lust. In my delirious, sleep-deprived state, I had incorrectly worded my message. I had said that I would say Asmodeus was a former sin of lust and my OC was the current one.

This was not what I had meant, I had meant using the name Asmodeus as a reference, not the actual biblical figure. And even then, I would have shortened it to make it even more of a reference. (ex: Ozzie, Azzy, Moudes, etc.) But, for some unknown reason to me, Melody had an issue with this.

She started an argument with me about how Asmodeus was from Christian religion and that it was offensive to Buddhism or something. I’m gonna be honest, the details are a bit fuzzy. In an effort to make me look like the bad guy, she brought up another set of OCs me and my friend group had made that were based around the Ten Commandments. (Also, I didn’t even use the biblical Ten Commandments because those are paragraphs, I used the ones from the Seven Deadly Sins anime!) These OCs were mentioned in that same private call outside the server!

Melody, being more awake than me, sent several messages in quick succession, not allowing me to get a word in or get my thoughts together. And as always, the person who could get more of a word in wins. Me, being half awake and ready to fall asleep, told Melody I was going to bed and would continue to talk about this later because I was tired and didn’t feel like arguing with her.

I woke up at around five in the afternoon and decided to go into the server and apologize for how I acted and let Melody know I was ready to talk. Only to find the server missing from the list.

Confused, I went to check Melody’s Tumblr blog to see if something happened or if I was banned by mistake. Instead, I found that Melody had made a post about banning me over a picrew I had made.

I will admit, the picrew was BDSM themed and it did include Nezha. But, I was not the first person to send it nor was I the only one who participated. Melody herself participated with one of her OC and Macaque. I will also admit that I forgot to spoil the picrew I made due to being tired.

However, I am not here to get into the ‘NeZhA iS tWeLvE’ debate. I'm here to share what I experienced with Melody and her server.

Here's what could've been done instead of straight-up banning me: talking to me about the image and asking me to spoil or delete it! I was given no warning of my ban, only waking up to it and seeing the post about it! She had made no effort to message me or inform me!

Alright, now that you have all of the info and my side of the story, time for a little analysis. I am a major psychology lover due to my own mental problems and I adore learning about the human mind.

Melody’s two nicknames in her server are ‘Queen’ and ‘Mother’. She is not either of these things.

A queen looks after her subjects, a mother looks after her children. Melody, on the surface, appears to look after the people in her server. But as someone who's seen beneath that surface and experienced people like this long before I met her, she is anything but.

Melody invites people into her server, welcomes them, and smothers them with affection. Then, when they aren't so new anymore, she winds to a stop and focuses on the people in her inner circle.

Melody watches over above, looking at everything and everyone in her server with the eye of a hawk. Waiting and biding her time for them to give her a reason.

Then, when she gains that person’s trust, makes them let down their walls around her, she sees them do something she doesn't like, and she finally has her reason. She strikes.

She removes them from the safe environment she builds around them and feeds them to the wolves. She takes mentally unwell people and puts them in an unsafe environment where they can be harmed.

She wounds them so they aren't thinking straight and baits them to lash out with posts on her Tumblr blog so she can paint herself as the victim. And once they do lash out, she links the places where people can attack them in the form of a ‘call-out’.

Have you noticed the fact that everyone Melody bans and posts about, deletes their blog? Now, I am not excusing these people's actions. But, no one should be put in an unsafe environment where they can be harassed and threatened.

In fact, I’m sure I would’ve been in a similar situation had I not gotten a hold of a close friend of mine. She comforted me, calmed me down, and distracted me from Melody. Her support and love allowed me to be the bigger person and not respond, blocking Melody and removing the problem.

But, I’m stubborn and tired of being the bigger person.

Melody is a manipulator and an abuser.

Let my story be a cautionary tale on these kinds of people. And, don’t harass Melody over this. If you do, you’re no better than her. Instead, go straight for the block button.

[romilly-jay]

A Most /un/Welcome Return...

**spoilers**

This was originally titled in the opposite direction, reflecting the calm homecoming of returning to books by a reliably enjoyable writer.

But, I'm sorry, it's 10 days since the US election and while I'm going an excellent job of hiding from that reality, can I just take this moment to say: Seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeriously? *sad, sad face*

One of those moments when I treasure being served up X/ex-twitter in the form of people I in fact want to hear from (interrupted by a harmless story about mistaken identities and death metal concerts):

And it gives me fresh energy for the subject matter of MRK's Lady Astronaut books - which include two of my absolutely favourite things, aka an alternative history/timeline (so much fun! so much that could happen! yikes, and some of it actually does!) and SPACE.

These are GREAT books for conveying the message that what we do when we seemed to be facing impossible odds is - we carry on. We try. We do what we can. The darkness moves to engulf us and in whatever ways come to hand, small or large, we push back.

Specifically, in MRK's world, she's written a post-disaster narrative set among survivors of an extinction-level meteor strike. I don't think I'd even call this cosy catastrophe, though, because the world that's left behind, although it functions in a reasonably recognisable way for 1950s America, is pretty unmistakably dystopian. The consequences are many and multiple. But there's also gin, cake, s*x and friendship. And petty rivalries. Actual life, persisting regardless.

What I was *PLANNING* to say was that these are a great example of books I will happily read over and over again, that are partly/mostly in the terrain of things I'd write about myself, but are NOT the kind of book I'm aspiring to write. That's because they are i) hard science faithful in a way that feels frankly beyond my appetite and energy and ii) overtly identity-politics political, in ways I support but again don't think I could replicate

MRK does a superbly impressive job on conjuring the feeling of being in Real Space Race conditions - the checklists, the jargon, the reality of what it feels like for Real Astronauts and the things they really need to pay attention to. She's checking her material with Real Space People so full snaps for doing the homework. And doing it well.

Comes over to me as very 13 Minutes to the Moon in tone:

The other thing she puts right at the centre of the story is the question of race relations, both inside the space programme and between the space programme and Everyone Else, left behind.

The main terrorist opposition is effectively living out the logic of Whitey On the Moon and gets a sympathetic hearing from the main character, and a predictably unsympathetic response from the holders of power within the framework of the Lady Astronaut world:

That's on me (the lack of attention to the detail of the hard science and the lack of desire for a political fight) but there's maybe also something subtle and interesting - and perhaps difficult and perhaps self-defeating - about learning to recognise, in order to try to write, PRECISELY the story that fits your own personality and interests.

[I have a high level of confidence, though, that this is terrible, terrible advice for anyone who wants to have an actual published/publishing career, where the correct version of the advice needs to be - write that version of your own preferred story, but in such a way that it's likely to chime for other readers and - if you have the alchemical touch, which I certainly don't - shaped for the zeitgeist. I don't expect to be published commercially but I AM expecting myself to finish writing my Raynovia story and to complete it in a way that absolutely works as a testament to the kind of stories and writing *I want* to leave as - temporary - legacy in my corner of the internet / London.]

[imperiuswrecked]

I’m honestly confused about the Tenoch situation.

I'm gonna sum it up and if you need more info just go through my Tenoch Huerta tag

A few days ago, Elena Rios, (a survivor of an acid attack/attempted femicide from her politician ex boyfriend who hired someone to attack her in 2019, is an advocate for laws to protect women and a saxophonist) calls out Poder Prieto on twitter (a company that is supposed to promote the fight against racism that she and Tenoch were a part of in years past but are both no longer a part of/have distanced themselves from it) for using her music/work in a podcast that she did not authorize and was not paid for, and in that tweet also claims that Tenoch is a Sexual Predator, and then goes on to claim he assaulted her and many others and that Poder Prieto covered it up because Tenoch is a Big Celebrity.

Poder Prietro replies that they didn't use her work. However this company is shady because earlier in the year they stole credit of textile art (a cape) from an indigenous artist lady and then tried for months to discredit her and claim she was lying about making the cape. The truth came out, the woman was credited by Tenoch when he finally found out what happened and he made amends with her even though he didn't know what was going on but wanted to make things right. So again, both Tenoch and Elena have left/distanced themselves from this company.

Elena spent days repeating this accusation and claiming she had more to say but that she was afraid to say it because Tenoch is a Big Celebrity. Multiple journalists reached out to her to get more details and she blocks them, many people who ask her to post something more concrete or evidence or even details of an incident she ignores or blocks them. She says she will post more when she is ready. She later deletes the tweet where she specifically said that Tenoch assaulted her and many others.

The internet/media goes insane, people take sides, both Tenoch and Elena get massive amounts of hate/death threats and insults. Racists are having a field day and people already assume that Tenoch is an abuser.

Tenoch takes a couple days to respond in a formal post on Instagram stating that he and Elena were once a couple who had a consensual loving relationship that ended a year ago and that after that she had begun misrepresenting their relationship to their mutual friends and in private. Tenoch also says he has people who knew/witnessed them during their time as a couple who could back him up that it was not an abusive relationship. And that he has legal personal who he hired a few months ago because of her claims. This means whatever this was, was a private dispute before Elena posted it on twitter. Elena did not once mention that she and Tenoch were in a relationship or that they broke up before the publicity of the Wakanda Forever movie.

Elena responds that she cannot respond to Tenoch's statement because she is busy promoting laws to protect women from abusers like him and his fans who sent her death threats. The only screenshots of messages she posted were of random fans death/hate messages. She does not once post anything specific about her claims.

This is now a "he said, she said" situation, and until Elena posts something official or presents evidence, or whatever, then there is no news. However because this is the internet, people either believe Tenoch or Elena and think the other is a liar, meanwhile the racist people who hated Tenoch and have tried for years to destroy his career are using this against him. No other women have come forward with any claims of abuse by Tenoch as of yet.

That's all that happened and this is the final ask I will answer to explain everything because I know there's alot of misinformation out there.