#she hates touch because she feel like the ship of theseus at this point. if you touch my body are you even really touching me type deal

[poniko-w]

new weird yuri au just dropped (featuring a super old "corrupted" bachikin design heavily based off of her in mo2 (that i should probably remake one day..))

colored version + extra doodles

[literameera]

White Sails

2433 words

The oceans going to swallow him whole some day and only then could he die happy.

Caspian already gave his soul to the sea, his first great love. Initially I was excited for him and how he got to live out his dreams. He’d write to me about his exploits, I’d gasp and laugh when appropriate, as if he can see, and finally when the stories ended, I’d write to say that I’ve been living the same way: wake up, work, eat, sleep and mostly anticipate. He’d tease that I live like a widow refusing to believe her husband's dead, wasting away staring out the window, hoping for him to someday return to her. Like the ship of Theseus every time he left a part of him had been replaced, how long has he been a man I couldn't recognise, a ghost wearing my lover’s skin.

Only the wooden planks stepped on by Theseus himself belong to the original ship, the rest are imposters high off the glory of His name. Your skin cells regenerate every twenty-seven days – and it’s been longer than that since my hands held his, the wind already swept all memories of my words from his mind. He can only belong to one and she’s infinitely larger than me. To him, her cold embrace feels like coming home. It’s selfish – I’d remind myself – selfish to want to steal what makes him happy all because I feel lonely, he’s loved the ocean long before he’s loved me, and he will long after. I can only hope she’s kind when she does finally take him. I’ve heard that saltwater burns your lungs and that a body only sinks for a moment and as it fills with water it floats to the top, I don’t want them to find his body, he wouldn’t want them to either. I hope his clothes weigh him down and 80% becomes all of him, that he sinks to Atlantis and the sun never feels him again, we don’t deserve it.

But then he comes home, the wind in his hair, salt clinging to his skin and horribly chapped lips, he kisses me hello and I get a taste of what he feels. He tells me he’s missed the warm water from the shower while I wash his locks, that his land legs haven’t grown back yet so can I hold on just a little tighter ‘to make sure I don’t fall of course’. I tell him our neighbours' gossip and he laugh and gasps when appropriate and says that he’s missed the shop at the end of the street, in the morning he’ll grab groceries and those chocolates he’s loved since he was a kid, and some things never change. When it’s quiet and we lull we watch the sun set, sitting on a linoleum countertop in the kitchen, he glows orange in its light and tells me he’s missed me.

When a whale dies its body sinks to the benthic zone, there where there’s no sun, no blood, no heat, no me, or him the oceans creatures eat on its flesh, their entire life's sustenance reliant on an animal they’ve never seen alive and blobfish get their namesake feature from the rapid shift in pressure, they essentially burst while being pulled up by fishermen. The universe is kept spinning by forces we don’t know and can’t name and one day the sun could burst, and we wouldn’t know until 8 minutes later when its light should touch us and won’t. But it did that day, the light travelled through a solar system to shine on him, and shine on me, and that’s how we met. It was fate. Eight years later it’s still fate when Caspian wakes up beside me, his skin a warm brown, like the terracotta pots he brings back to accommodate my ever-growing garden, and his tousled hair a sun-bleached orange, the roots betray their natural umber colour (the same as the eyes he was currently hiding behind tired palms), men like him are born out of stardust, and they can’t help but to replicate its heat. He’s looking at me now, his warm hands place a stray strand of my own umber hair behind my ear and pauses on my cheek, my bronze skin a slight contrast to his, brown eyes reflecting brown.

‘Let’s go over the plan, alright Leya?’ He breaks the silence, ‘we’ll lock up, give the keys to Theo and Honora, they promised to water our plants and dust the place while we’re gone, we pick up your jumper from the market –Eilidh promised it’ll be done by then- and then it’s me, you and wherever you can land your finger on a map.’

‘Yeah, I can’t wait. Me, you and The Caspian’ the smile I give him falters and my bottom lip trembles. He frowns.

It was my idea to come with him, I was tired of being alone and he was tired of forgetting synonyms of vast for his letters home, I knew he exhausted all the ways to say I love you when he started to transcript theology to me:

‘They believe that next to Christ, that’s what they call him, there was a man that lived in sin, two in fact but only one of them matters. They don’t know anything about this man, not even his name, except for his last words. And they were that of forgiveness and salvation. A man whose entire history is left out of the book that chronicles it. We know nothing of his home, his family, his life, not even his crimes, but we know that he loved and was loved in return. I don’t believe a lick of it but by God these people are good storytellers.’

I did want to go. Maybe the second I see the flickering reflected crescent moon on the ocean waves I’d decide I never wanted to leave, that the past 25 years of living and four years waiting can all be justified by that one experience. But I also couldn’t just leave. He was the one with adventures and loose ties and sea salt, and I’m the one that waits. The diligent partner with a cup of tea and open arms for him, who were we if not that? Who am I without anticipation and loneliness? For years, my life was contingent on feeling and watching a ticking clock, and now I just get to be free? It doesn’t sound real. It doesn’t sound fair on the woman I used to be, the one still waiting. He knows how I feel, he must, from the furrow of an eyebrow I know he’s got me pegged.

‘Remember the night before I left- the first time that is- and I kept going over lists, obligations and checking everything twice, I even meal prepped your food for months in advance. And you told me everything will still be here when I get back...’ He pauses to hold my face in both hands, brown eyes locked on brown eyes to make sure I was listening, ‘everything will still be here when we get back. If you don’t want to go that’s fine, we won’t, I’ll spend the next six months right here with you, and every day after that if you want me to. I’m tired of you being alone. But if you do want to go... We lock up, see the world and come back, it’s that easy.’ With that he kisses my temple -the most delicate part of the head – and climbs out of bed.

Honora and Theo promised to give all the leftover perishable foods to the family around the corner, they have seven kids and not enough to feed them all. They also ensured once a week every plant will be watered, all letters brought in, and the surfaces periodically dusted. The jumper Eilidh had made was beautiful, she told us wool is preferable when wet because it resists water and keeps you warm. She made it green, in case I miss the trees, and Caspian paid her double. I had hoped the air would be electric, brimming with something, as if it knew I’m leaving this time too. Everything was the same, same as it's always been and same as it always will. And I won’t be, I’ll go out there, replace my ships planks and come back me, but not wholly or maybe as more, and if Caspian’s with me the whole time who would notice the change, all of my red strings connect back to his.

It was half a day's journey to the port, and I felt it all. At some point my head was pulled to rest on his shoulder and every time the sun shone particularly bright he held a hand over my eyes to shield them. When we were close to enough to the sea to smell it, the briny tang light in the air, he came into himself, as if he swallowed sunlight, and grinned.

I hate this. Caspian told me I will at first, I haven’t got the familial love he has. A runaway father that was only 19 when he met his future wife at the port. The family was forcibly moved to a landlocked town when opportunities dimmed and Caspian's childhood was spending every holiday possible making the hours long treks to the beach, with just enough time to wiggle his toes in the sand and swallow lungsful of water when learning to swim, and when he was older it was learning how to sail with his father. Finally, it’d get too cold to continue so his mother would swaddle him in towels and place him on her lap, until he eventually grew too big for her, together they’d watch the sun set. He told me once that it was like the water was just a mirror and everything radiated pink and orange and golden hues until finally... darkness, and there was twice as many stars as usual. Then they’d go home and count down till the next summer. His love was intergenerational, it’ll grow on you, trust me. But it won’t, I hate this. I feel sick & disoriented, it’s too loud and quiet at the same time. Like when people move from a bustling city, heavy in smog and movement, to a quaint village, and there they find the crickets and pollen too much to bear. There was none of the sounds I was accustomed to and all too many of ones I wasn’t. I can’t even swim.

How did we plan for weeks and not think that I would need to know how to swim?

Caspian had finished prepping the sails and letting us go in the wind's direction, promising he’ll take us as far East as he can find – and then carry on. He had tried to explain all the terms to me, but words like ‘jib’ and ‘hull’ and ‘tiller’ easily slipped out of my mind like water. Instead, I stood by the helm and just watched him work, focusing on the beads of sweat running down his forehead and pushing supper down as far deep as it goes, as to not ruin this for him. When he had finished, he gave me the tour, showing me the saloon, where to cook, where to rest, where to pray, how to store in such a small space and when I was overwhelmingly exhausted from the information swimming in my head, he grabbed some pillows and blankets and led me back to the cockpit. There he prepped everything like it was our bed at home and laid down, gently pulling me down with him, our knees were bent awkwardly, and we were closer together than usual. That’s when I understood When I was younger my mother would bring me to visit her friends and after the initial gasps and hugs and ‘my how you’ve grown!’ they would largely ignore me to talk to each other. One of her friends, Mariam, had a baby boy that would sleep in a wooden bassinet pushed to the wall closest to where I was sitting, when he did stir, they’d finally address me again and tell me to rock him slightly, let him be lulled back to rest. Here, we were lightly rocked side to side by Poseidon himself and entire galaxies shining down on us, like a sleeping baby in a bassinet. I didn’t know there could be so many stars and still such a vast darkness. Caspian told me about the constellations he knows and the ones he’s made up, his own mythologies mapped out above us. And when I was too tired to listen, eyes drooping and his words bleeding into each other he tenderly held my elbow to help me up, shifting so I could rest my weight on him, and walked me to the bed, trying as best he could to push my dead weight into the cramped space. Leaving only for a moment to bring the pillows back in, before climbing into bed besides me.

The next morning, we stopped on still waters, and he taught me how to swim. In the afternoons, after I showed him my grandmothers' recipes for the cold, he tried to teach me more sailing terms and by the evening I’d read to him under the dimming light, I’d have to stop after a moment, too nauseous to read the words. It was a routine we near perfected in a month. I could tell he was happy; he was drowning in it. Shockingly, I was too, a saloon that smelled like garlic and spice, secured down potted herbs, dry storage spaces filled to the brim with my books, and his slow breaths when I should be asleep, was enough. On days the wind was too bad to pause he’d make me use the knots he taught me and shout what I need to do if we tip over, the exhilaration was more than anything I’d ever known.

Resources would run low, and he’d dock in the port of a country I'd never heard of, a culture unfamiliar and language unknown. With limited communication and lots of points & smiles we’d buy what we need and when our food was restocked, I’d ask to stay a few days more. We’d integrate ourselves in the local community and learn how to say ‘hello’ and ‘thank you’ and plan to return in the holiday season. We’d make pocket communities across the world and relish in hot water and write letters to the people back home.

[thegoodgayshit]

Luz’s mother really doesn’t want to send Luz to camp. She knows once she leaves, there is no going back. But Luz has a knack for getting into trouble, and one day she stumbles into the same type of people her mother would have preferred she avoided. After helping Luz dissolve her high school bully into dust, Eda and Lilith know right away that this kid is just like them - a child of the gods. So Luz hops on a Pegasus and heads to Camp Half-blood, where she embarks on a dangerous quest that makes her both friends and enemies... and she might even save Olympus along the way.

Chapter Eleven: I Get Threatened by the King of Athens

There was a tense and uncomfortable silence. Luz had a sinking feeling in her gut, like pieces of a puzzle were coming together in a game she hadn’t agreed to play.

“What do you mean Amity isn’t with him?” She said quietly, not moving her eyes away from Theseus. If she had thought he was cute before, now the sight of him made her blood run cold. She should have listened to Gus. “Achilles captured her in Boulder. Where is she?”

Theseus pursed his lips. “Achilles isn’t always the most tactful. He has his own agenda too. He was supposed to bring Amity to my boss in Colorado, but he went off the rails, literally, and took her to his new place in Kansas City. Fled from our boss because of some disagreement between them.” Theo scoffed, rolling his eyes. “As if we could even refuse to begin with.”

Luz was stunned. “I have… so many follow up questions.”

“Kansas City? Like… our next stop?” Gus asked with a frown. “That’s one coincidence.”

Theseus hummed in annoyance, crossing his arms over his chest. “You’ll soon figure out that few things in our world are a coincidence. The gods are pawning you even as we speak. You met the flower crown lady in Cincinnati, who gave you a job to prove to the love lady she made the right choice in favoring you.” He gestures to Luz with a roll of his eye. “Then, your daddy gives you a hand in the train station to make sure you’re on the exact right path they need you to be on, so you can’t mess this one up. So sure, coincidence.”

“My dad?” Luz asks, not sure what Theseus meant.

“The map,” Gus hissed in realization. “As the god of travelers, some kids of Hermes must have special abilities with map reading.”

“Then there was the way she could haggle the price down without even trying,” Willow added with wide eyes. “He’s also the god of merchants.”

“See, what did I tell you?” Theseus said with a smile. “You kids are quick.”

Luz didn’t like feeling like an idiot. But that’s what was happening right now. All the time she and her friends thought they were doing something good, all that time Luz felt guilty thinking this was her fault and the gods had been manipulating their quest from the beginning.

Her anger must have shown on her face because Theseus shot her a sympathetic smile.

“Don’t feel too bad, Luz. It happens to literally every great demigod.” His face hardened. “In Athens, my quest in the Labyrinth was half a test of skill and half a test of wit. My father promised me glory and honor by coming home a hero, and when I got back on my boat I didn’t even have to touch my ship the whole way home. It was like the sea guided my boat home on its own, and I knew my father had blessed me. Do you know what happened after that?”

There was silence between the three of them. Luz remembered the story, but with the look on Theseus’ face, she knew she couldn’t say it.

“Poseidon didn’t raise the white sails when I arrived,” Theseus said bitterly. “My beloved stepfather had asked me to when I arrived so he knew I was home safe. When I arrived, I was the new King of Athens, because he had thrown himself off the roof thinking I was dead. Poseidon killed him.”

Theseus sat back in his chair, a look of complete misery on his face. “I blamed myself too, you know. Then, when I died, the gods couldn’t even spare me then. The judges wanted to send me to Tartarus. But Minos argued that because I slew the Minotaur, I deserved Elysium. In the end, I was punished to roam the Fields of Asphodel forever.”

Willow and Gus were looking at one another, but Luz was so enamored by the story she couldn’t tear her eyes away. She had always been a sucker for a dramatic tale.

“I forgot everything. Who I was, what I stood for. And then my boss came to me and pulled me from my torment. I was alive again, and a new man. I would never serve the gods as long as I served him.”

“The man in the mountain,” Luz whispered, looking at Theseus unable to disguise her fear. “Who is he?”

“The reason I’m here is so you never find out,” Theseus said slowly, and the three of them flinched. Theseus chuckled under his breath.

“Sorry, not like that. I’ve come as his messenger to offer you a deal.”

“A deal?” Willow said with a frown. Luz shared the sentiment. Why would the man who had been tormenting Luz’s dreams for weeks want to spare them?

“Look, you kids have a good heart.” Theseus continued, eyeing each of them carefully. “My boss knows that. I’ve now seen it myself. We’re all pawns in the game, we always have been. You didn’t ask for this quest, so my boss is giving you a chance you won’t get if you continue forward to Colorado. Go to Kansas City, take Amity from Achilles, and go straight home. Leave this whole thing alone and spare yourselves the pain and heartache.”

“But all of Olympus will fall without Hestia,” Gus protested, “we have to save her!”

“But why?” Theseus asked, and Gus fell silent. “Why can’t an old age of pain and suffering just end? My boss will allow a new era to rise, and demigods can live peacefully with the other mortals. I can see my father again. You can all go home without needing to fear a monster will hunt you down. Luz, you can have a normal life with your mom where she doesn’t have to worry.”

Luz flinched, and Theseus smiled slightly. She didn’t know how he knew about her Mami, but she didn’t like the way it rolled off his tongue.

“Stop that!” Gus demanded to Theseus, and he looked over at him innocently. Willow reached over and put a hand over Luz’s.

“I am just being truthful,” Theseus said, and Gus’s eyes hardened.

“No, you’re not. You’re deceiving her. You went to Tartarus because of how you treated Ariadne. You abandoned her on an island and she would have died there if Dionysus didn’t save her and make her his wife.”

Theseus froze, and for a moment his expression changed, going from sympathetic to cold.

Willow nodded along to Gus, pointing an accusing finger at Theseus.

“You were a war criminal too. You kidnapped the Amazons and the Spartans and caused a war for the Athenians between them. You were exiled because you treated others so terribly. The gods didn’t force you to be awful.”

Theseus’ eyes flashed furiously. “I am offering you demigods a way out! A chance to escape the prophecy.”

“Why would we want to do that?” Luz butts in, narrowing her eyes. “The prophecy told us we would bring Olympus peace.”

“The prophecy says nothing of the sort,” Theseus growled. “Don’t trust the words that can be so easily twisted. It also says you will dawn a new age. That is exactly what my boss is trying to do. And unlike you, I’ve heard it in its entirety. One of you is doomed to die, and that is why Amity would not tell the camp what she heard. She assumed it was her, and that is why she told her companions to run. But I know better. It will be one of you three.”

There was silence again, and Luz felt her mouth open and close fearfully. She didn’t know what she was going to say. Theseus got up from his chair, adjusting his notebook and pen to tuck it under his arms. Luz realized he was leaving.

“You don’t need to decide now,” Theseus said carefully, though he was clearly still angry. “My boss just asked me to pitch the offer to you. You’re still heroes, and now that you know where Amity is I imagine you’re going to go find her. Last we heard, Achilles was planning on hiding in the musician's manor in Sunset Hill on the west end. Look for the gold lyre outside.”

He pushed his way into the aisle, turning his head one more time.

“If you chose to continue, my boss will not hold back. We will do everything we can to finish our mission, and that includes stopping you if you get in our way. And I can promise you this, you are no match for my boss.”

Luz’s chest flared with anger as the entire conversation hit her at once. She hated Theseus. He was a huge bully, who was so mad at the world he blamed everybody else for it but himself. Luz knew better, and if his boss was anything like Theseus, then she hated him even more than she already did. Standing up, she balled her fists at him and stared him right in the eye.

“You’re no hero. We’re going to finish this quest and free Hestia, and we’re going to do it right. You can tell your boss we’re on our way.”

Theseus paused, but he didn’t say a single thing. He just looked at Luz sadly, like he was trying to decide what color coffin would go best with her skin tone. He walked to the front of the bus and whispered something to the driver. The bus screeched to a stop, and Luz had to grip Willow’s hand to keep herself steady. Theseus got off, and the bus started moving again. Luz collapsed into the seat, and Willow leaned into her shoulder comfortingly.

“That was really brave, Luz,” she said, and Luz shook her head.“No, it wasn’t. It was stupid. My Mami was right, I have a terrible habit of making enemies.”

“Theseus is an enemy,” Gus assured her, “but now we at least have some information.”

“Yeah, like how Amity is in Kansas City,” Willow said. “We can go get her tomorrow morning.”

“That, and that the man in the mountain is more scared of Luz than we originally thought.”

“What?” Luz sat up and looked at Gus like he had three heads. Gus shrugged his shoulders. “Theseus was trying really hard to cover it up, but their plan is dangerous. He is trying to keep us away from the plan, not protect us from it.”

“That’s a bold assumption, Gus,” Willow said with a smile. “But it’s also optimistic! I like it.”

“What about the little detail that one of us is going to die?” Luz said with a frown. “I don’t like those odds at all.”

“We won’t know what’s happening with the prophecy until we find Amity,” Willow reassured her. “For all we know, he could have been lying to us to try and scare us into submission. We can’t think like that. Trying to change a prophecy never works.”

Luz groaned, covering her head with her hands. “This is so confusing. I’m sorry I dragged you guys into this mess.”

“We want to be here, Luz,” Gus said with a smile. “Besides, I always knew Theseus was not the greatest, but today my theory was actually proven!”

“Yeah, what a jerk.” Willow agreed. “Sorry we didn’t believe you, Gus.”

Gus rolled his eyes and nudged Luz playfully. “Don’t. I saw the way you guys looked at him. We can’t trust every attractive demigod we run into anymore.”

Willow blushed, but Luz laughed, nudging Gus back affectively. “He has a point.” Luz reached down to her lap and picked up the Tupperware Theseus had given her. “Do we think this is safe to eat? Because I’m starving and I don’t want to go find Amity on an empty stomach.”

Gus snatched it out of her hands. “Don't eat that! For all we know it could be poisoned. It's enemy food.”

Willow had completely ignored both Luz and Gus and was busy eating half of the sandwich. “I had some when he gave it to us. It’s safe.”

“Great!” Luz snatched the container out of Gus’s hands and popped it open, her mouth watering at the sight. It was a fresh PB&J on white bread and an assortment of crackers grapes and cheese. She dug in, finishing the contents in what must have been a record time.

Gus grumbled something about how we were risky and totally stupid, but he ate along with them. By the time they had finished, the three of them were sitting together comfortably, and Luz’s eyes were getting heavy. Willow nudged her with her shoulder.

“If you and Gus want to sleep, you can go ahead. I’ll take first watch.”

“Are you sure?” Luz definitely wanted to sleep, but she didn’t want to leave Willow watching by herself.

Willow chuckled, putting her backpack between her and Luz, so she could rest her head on it. Gus settled in next to Luz, resting his head on his own pack against Luz’s side.

“I’m sure. Try and catch some sleep. We don’t know when we’ll get another chance.”

On that happy note, Luz wasn’t sure how she would be able to get to bed with her mind whirling. But as soon as she rested the pack against her head, she found that she was so exhausted from the day’s events she fell right asleep.

The dreams came again, and Luz found herself standing in the mountain, hiding behind a huge metal shipping container. She poked her head out and saw the man in the mountain, his back turned to her, staring straight forward at a huge metal cage. Inside was a girl, no older than fifteen, dressed in white rags and sitting with her hands bunched up to her knees. Luz thought she might have been very pretty if she wasn’t looking so haggled, her copper-haired pulled back messily and her eyes sunken and tired. Despite her half hazard appearance, she was staring at the mountain man with disdain, like he wasn’t worth her time at all. Luz liked her instantly.

“Why won’t you just give in?” The man said angrily, slamming the base of his bronze staff into the ground. Luz had never seen him with the staff before, he usually had a sword. He was cloaked in dark robes, and Luz could see parts of a dark mask sticking out from the front of his head. “You’ve been here for weeks now. Your fire should have died long ago.”

“The fires of Olympus are not so easily extinguished,” the girl said softly, frowning at him. “As long as there is hope, I will remain here.”

“I will crush your hope beneath my feet!” the man roared, and Luz flinched at the volume. The girl in the cage did not seem so easily frightened, and instead, her eyes flickered beyond the man and towards Luz. The two of them made eye contact, and Luz was shocked to her core by the warmth that flooded through her. Her eyes were the color of dying embers, and Luz couldn’t help but smile.

“Hope remains,” the girl said, but not to the man. She was looking directly at Luz. “And so I remain.”

Luz didn’t realize the dream had shifted until she was somewhere else. She was standing in a huge room reminiscent of an old ballroom. The tiles were white and smooth, and the walls had a golden wallpaper draping them. Everything inside was expensive, but the furniture was pushed against the wall like it wasn’t needed. Outside the polished white windows, Luz saw a massive garden and a long driveway, and then towards the street, she saw a stone plaque that read “1200 West, 55th Street”.

As Luz turned her attention back to the center of the room, she did a double-take. There was Amity, chained to the middle post with her eyes closed, looking worse for wear. She was still in the clothes she had worn when she left camp two weeks before, and she was grubby, with cuts and bruises all over her body. Luz lunged forward to help her, but the sound of laughing from another room startled her so badly she diverted and slide behind one of the expensive sofas hiding from view.

Two men emerged, talking amicably with each other.

“I don’t know how you managed to get away, you’re bound by eternal oath.” The first said, and Luz peaked over to get a closer look. He was a tall and skinny man dressed in simple white cotton pants and a blue shirt, with long black curly hair that sat messily on his head.

“I haven’t technically broken any oath yet,” the second said, grinning deviously. He was much larger than the first man, with muscles on muscles. He wore a sleeveless white shirt that was so tight Luz could see the outline of his stomach, jeans, and white sneakers. His dark hair was close-cropped to his head, and he had two swords hanging loosely on his belt. “Belos can wait a little longer. Besides, this is in his best interest. The prophecy says so.”

He reached down towards Amity, cupping her chin with his index finger and thumb, and Luz felt a snarl pulling itself angrily from her lips. She tried to rush forward but her limbs felt like lead, and she was frozen in place.

“She doesn’t look good. Keep her alive until the other kids get here. I put a bottle of nectar in the fridge.”

“Belos better come through with his promise.” The first said lowly, crossing his arms. “Taking out three demigods on my own is not how I planned to enjoy my new life.”

“You will be compensated for your work,” the second said with a shrug. “If there is one thing he is, it’s practical. He appreciates your time and effort on our joined mission.”

The first sniffed disdainfully, “very well.” He looked over at Amity, and his eyebrows pinched in concern. “Are we sure she’s breathing? You know I don’t do well with pets…”

Luz was interrupted by something shaking her violently, and she woke up with a yelp, her head smacking into something. She groaned in pain, rubbing her forehead.

“Ow!” Both she and Gus said at the same time.

Luz looked around and realized she was back on the bus, and that it was now almost dawn. The hard thing she’d collided with was Gus’ own head, and the boy was now standing up and leaning against the seat for support.

“That’s the last time I wake you up,” Gus moaned, shaking his head like it would get rid of the pain.

“We’re here,” Willow said, doing her best to stifle the laugh. “We just arrived at the Kansas City bus terminal. We have to get off and look for Amity.”

“No need,” Luz said certainly, standing up and throwing her backpack over her shoulder. “I know exactly where she is.”

[xbarrjallenx]

The Only One

Pairing: Newt Scamander x Reader

Summary: A drunk and cheeky Newt asked (Y/N) to give him some love once again. Would the latter grant his request before their reunion night came to an end?

Word count: 2.890

Posted: 12th of December 2018

A/N: And here is the third and the final part of Happier! I don’t know how it turned out, but I did my best to give it a fair ending. Please leave some feedbacks, because I really need to know what you think about it, so please please, I am desperately begging you.

My song inspiration for this part is Ed Sheeran’s “One”. It is one of my favourite songs, so please give it a listen. Thank you very much for the love and support!

- G. x

P.S.: Tumblr is having problems with links in the post, so if you want to read the first and the second part, you can go to my profile and search for Happier and Give Me Love in my Masterlist, under Fantastic Beasts section. Thank you and sorry for the inconvenience!

Tags: @atlas-of-a-human-soul; @i-ship-it-ironically; @dreacantsleep; @writtenbypics; @themagicforceofmischief; @ann-is-amazing-person; @llealia

“Wha-,” Your eyes grew wide in shock as soon as you heard his request, which was also a kind of a confession, and your heart hastily pounded against your chest. “What? Newt, are you okay?” You were startled, because he wasn’t a very straightforward person before, but his older brother and your best friend just widely smiled to encourage you to believe him.

Give me love like never before, because after all this time, I still feel the same for you.

You were completely confused and your brain suddenly seized by hearing his muffled, but still understandable words. Well, that was the most bemusing thing that you have ever heard in your life.

What did he just say? He still felt the same for you? He still loved you? He wanted for you to love him again? Absurd!

“It’s okay, if you do-,” Newt started his indistinctive mumbles once again, but Leta cut him off as she pushed you closer to him, giggling in excitement. You almost knocked him off his feet, but you thankfully gripped on the table in front of you.

“She’s going with you.”

You swore to Merlin that you have never loathed anyone in your life until that very specific moment. How would you talk to him? You didn’t have any shots of firewhisky to build your courage high, what were you going to tell him?

“Good night!” The couple greeted you as soon as you and Newt bid your goodbye. You rolled your eyes at the sight of their cheeky smiles, but then you just shrugged it off. Newt was still a special person for you, after all.

The journey to Newt’s home was rather quiet and awkward. Many things ran through your clouded mind, but Newt didn’t seem to be bothered by any of his thoughts. In fact, he was being carefree as he hummed to a song that you barely recognised.

Give me love like never before, but how would you if he already had Tina? I still feel the same for you, when did he exactly realise it?

You walked beside him, your steps were serene, but his were messy, obviously because of the drunkenness. The space between you was just right, not too far, not that near either, but sometimes your hand would brush against his and you couldn’t deny that a powerful electricity would still gush through your veins. You longed for him, you longed for his touch and you missed him so much, his confession might be true, but then you realised: he was just drunk. You shouldn’t be too delusional!

“You are too quiet tonight, my (Y/N). What are you thinking about?” Newt instantaneously blurted out, grabbing your icy-cold hand to halt you from walking for a little while.

“Huh?” You were shocked for his direct actions too, mostly for him calling you his, but you quickly calmed down as his hand gave you the warmth that you were searching for ever since you got out of Theseus’ house. The cold winter breeze slightly woke him up, but the circulating alcohol in his system still kept him warm.

“What are you thinking about?” He repeated his question and your heart skipped its beat once again as he tightened his grip on your freezing hand. He still had the same effect on you, he still invigorated you.

“Nothing.” You lied through your teeth and, although you hated on doing it, you retracted your hand from his grasp and kept on walking. You heard him groan in annoyance, but he kept on walking in zigzags.

“(Y/N)!” He childishly whined to call your attention. This wasn’t obviously the Newt that you used to know, but well, ta-da, alcohol’s work, but you loved seeing him act in that way. He slightly made you chuckle, but you quickly stopped it, so you wouldn’t give him the wrong idea.

“What did you drink with your brother tonight, Mr. Scamander?” You raised an eyebrow while you waited for him to be beside you again. “Well, apart from the Champagne.”

“Fire-whis-keey!” He honestly answered, exaggeratedly emphasising every syllable of the word. Oh, what a naughty Hufflepuff!

“Firewhisky?” If it weren’t a night full of surprises! His simple answer suddenly explained why you had a very straightforward Newt Scamander in front of you. That alcoholic drink gifted courage. Every sear that your throat would endure was equivalent to a great quantity of courage. “Theseus, ugh!”

“Actually, it was my choice.” He slightly giggled as he looked at your perplexed, but annoyed facial expression. “It bu-burnt my throat a lot. How did you manage drinking that?”

You just rolled your eyes in response, but your gaze softened when you realised that you were slowly feeling comfortable with Newt once again. After all, you were having a normal conversation right now, as if he didn’t say anything bonkers minutes before. “I was broken hearted and I wanted to forget you. What about you? What is your motive?”

“Forget me?” He playfully scoffed as he remembered the last night you saw each other. “I remember otherwise.”

“Oh, shut up, Scamander!” You vexedly slapped his chest as he continuously teased, but you both burst into a noisy laughter soon after, making some chaos in the serene street you were walking on. “So, what is your motive? Are you trying to forget someone too?”

You avoided his gaze as Tina Goldstein came across your mind. Was he doing the same thing you did when you wanted to forget him? Was he ruining himself too to relieve his broken heart? Did Tina even break his heart? If yes, how could she? Newt was the most amazing person that you have ever known in your life.

He stopped you once again from walking, gripping on your arm this time. “No, stop torturing yourself with your useless thoughts! I did it just because I wanted to have an overflowing amount of courage on doing this.”

Newt nonchalantly pulled you close to him, your body tenderly bumping against his. His warm hand was brought on your crimson red cheek and he suddenly leant in to press a gentle kiss on your quivering lips. Saying that you were flabbergasted wasn’t enough, you never expected for this to happen!

Newt was literally out of his mind, but you realised that you were too, when you chose to flutter close your eyes and move your lips together with his. You missed this, you missed him. Your heart was crazily beating, because of the tenderness of his touch. You were kissing him again, after months of not seeing each other, after months of avoiding each other.

The kiss was so romantic and sweet, needy at the right point. He missed you, he needed you and to deepen the kiss even more, he slithered his arms around your waist, while you brought yours around his neck, slowly tugging your icy-cold fingers in his messy dark-auburn locks. His massive lips gave you comfort and warmth, albeit the bitter taste of the alcohol invaded your taste buds. His touch brought you to another world, a world where all the wrong things seemed so right and the right things seemed so wrong.

“Newt!” You called him out in the middle of your little making out session in one of the serene and quiet streets of London. You loved everything about it, you loved locking lips with him once again, but a little thought rapidly brought you back to the reality. “This is wrong.”

“Your lips and your body said otherwise, love.” Newt cheekily smirked as soon as you pushed him away from you, hands sadly leaving his tousled hair. You wanted to stay in his arms the whole night, but it was all wrong.

You were confused as different emotions wrapped your system: worry, because you still longed for his warmth, although it was erratic and inappropriate; sadness, because he wasn’t yours to hold anymore; agony, because your heart still beat for him even after he hurt you; nostalgia, because the taste that his lips allowed awakened most of your wonderful memories with him.

“Oh, the guy who flirts with you at work. Right!” Newt’s smirk speedily faltered as he remembered something that has been mentioned during the dinner earlier. How could he be so stupid sometimes?

You shook your head in response, hoping that he would understand that the guy meant really nothing to you. “I actually meant your girl, Tina.” You softly pronounced her name and warm teardrops briskly rolled down your face.

The thought of her having the man that you once loved broke you, hurt you.

“You don’t have to worry about her.” Newt assured you with a soft purr as he pulled you close to him once again. “Stop crying.”

“Why?” You asked while he cupped your cheeks with his calloused hand and wiped your hot tears with his thumbs just like how he used to.

Give me love like never before, because after all this time, I still feel the same for you.

His words echoed through the walls of your fuzzy mind once again and you just knew that the time of asking him what he really meant earlier came. After all, he didn’t answer your question regarding his new love interest.

“Newt?” You calmly called and he hummed in response to tell you that he was listening. “What do you even mean when you asked me to give you love like never before?”

Newt considered your eyes and squeezed your cheeks sheepishly. “It’s not that hard to understand, (Y/N).”

“I know, but all of this is bonkers for me, Newt!” You truthfully explained, grabbing his coat’s sleeves to take his hands off your reddened face. “I don’t even know if I should believe you or not.”

“Why is it difficult to believe me?” He eagerly asked and you just unleashed a long and heavy sigh before starting to walk once again. “Is it because I am drunk?”

“Yes,” You confidently and honestly answered. “aren’t you?”

“May I ask you a question, (Y/N)?” He asked as he walked towards your direction, still following you in zigzags. He kept on dropping important topics aside and he started getting on your nerves.

“Answering a question with another question isn’t very respectful, Mr. Scamander,” You sarcastically told him, shaking your head as you saw him struggling to walk properly. “but fire away.”

“Did you really mean what you said to me that night? That you would wait for me until she breaks my heart?” He brought the most improper topic up, still having lots of courage in his store. He never had the chance to ask you about it, he started avoiding you and you started avoiding him, right? This was his time.

You suddenly stopped from walking as you remembered what you told him that night and you suddenly felt a pang in your chest. Why did you do this to yourself? “Should I still wait for a very long time?”

“Answering a question with another question isn’t very respectful, (Y/N).” The cheeky Hufflepuff fired back, copying your statement minutes before. Touché, but couldn’t he be serious for just one time?

“Newton Scamander!” You pouted while you severely scolded him. He just laughed at your actions, but stopped on walking to face you.

“What?”

“You are so miffing!” You whined and you earned more tumultuous laughs from him. He could be very annoying, but he acted that way even when he was sober, so you just shook it off.

Well, he was so adorable when he would enjoy himself and it somehow fluttered your heart, breaking the thick walls that you were slowly building around your heart, in case he revealed you something that would hurt you by the end of your inexhaustible walk.

“But yes, I did mean every single word I said that night. Why would you think that I would lie?” You seriously asked him, making him stop from laughing. “Because I was drunk?”

“Exactly my point, love!” He slightly chuckled while he walked back towards your direction to grab your hand and pulled you as you both walked together. “You know, even though I am drunk, I am still aware of what I am doing, (Y/N), because I know what my heart wants.”

“And what does your heart want?” You curiously asked, considering his bluish-green orbs as you walked hand in hand. You weren’t paying attention to where you were going, but he still guided you. Was it you or Newt the drunk one?

“Another request for the night!” He blurted out with a wide grin on his face. He changed your topic once again and he was really trying to annoy you.

This limitless walk with Newt seemed like a very long rollercoaster ride. It was a walk full of ups, downs and loops of emotions.

“Again?” You vexedly whined, childishly pouting.

“You asked me what my heart wants, (Y/N)!” He sternly exclaimed to let you know that he was being serious this time.

“Ugh,” You groaned in annoyance, but your expression lit up as you finally saw his house from afar. It would be his last request for the night. It was too much, but you didn’t want to regret anything else for the rest of your life. Seize the night, just like what Theseus said before the dinner has started. “what is it?”

You both halted on walking as soon as you reached his porch and he leant in towards your direction to mumble something in your ear. “P-Please s-stay with me.”

“S-s-stay with you?” You terribly stuttered while curiosity and anxiety filled your senses. You couldn’t believe that he was requesting such thing from you, in fact you thought it was just one of his lame ways to make fun of you, but when you considered his stunning eyes, he seemed very sober and earnest. “Newt?”

“Yes,” He nodded sincerely with a warm toothy smile plastered on his face. “please stay with me forever.”

“Huh?” You harshly bit your lower lip, unanswerable questions popping in your head. “I don’t understand. How about Tina? Where is Tina? Why are you asking me this? What are you, Newt? Insane?”

Newt just shook his head in disbelief, letting go of your hand as he pulled you close to him. He was so touchy, still alcohol’s works, but you loved it when he welcomed your body in a lighthearted embrace.

“You might have noticed that I was happy with Tina that time, but the truth is that I am happier with you, (Y/N).” He truthfully confessed while he lovingly caressed your hair with his fingers. His voice was gloomy, but honest. He was hurt when you walked away from him that night, because that was when he realised that you were his everything. He realised that leaving the only person that he loved the most was the greatest mistake that he has ever done in his life and he wanted that person back. He needed you back. “I only have these eyes for you and I realised how important you are to me.”

You were important to him? That confession overwhelmed you even more. He still wanted you in his life and you were having mixed emotions once again, but this time, you could barely explain to yourself what you were exactly feeling, but happiness was surely dominating.

“Did she break your heart?” You calmly asked, being as stupid as Newt when he pointed out the guy who flirted with you at work during a very serious moment.

“All my senses came to light, (Y/N).” He softly mumbled as he left a sweet kiss on your temple. You shut your eyes as you enjoyed Newt’s presence, smelling his perfume as you buried your head on the crook of his neck. “I still love you, (Y/N).”

He still loved you! He still did and that moment seemed so surreal for you that you were so afraid to let him go, because you thought that might just lose him again. It seemed like a very unrealistic dream, because he took you back to him in just a heart beat. You were back in his arms, you were back in your own home.

“A-are you staying?” His voice nonchalantly broke, confidence and courage slowly deflating when he didn’t hear you answer back. “(Y/N)?”

“I love you too, Newt, and I am absolutely staying with you!” You suddenly hugged him back, snaking your arms around his torso tightly. He wanted you back and, it was useless to not grant his last request, because you wanted him too, you needed him too. “Please don’t ever leave me again, Newt.”

You kept your eyes solidly shut and your grip around his body was even tighter.

“I already made a mistake when I left you once, my little (Y/N). I wouldn’t forgive myself if I made another one.” He honestly muttered, planting a kiss on the top of your head while some choked sobs left his lips. The fear of completely losing you was still fresh in his mind.

“Newt, my love,” You comforted him by rubbing his back with your hands. “I am here now.”

“And I promise I’ll never leave again,” He proudly pledged, both of your hearts beating as one. “because you are the only one, my only one.”

[lonnieontherun]

SPOILER Review for ‘Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald’

I repeat, THIS is a spoiler review of the movie. Do not read beyond the cut if you have not seen the movie and don’t want to be spoiled!

*

I have started and re-started this review so many times now and each times it becomes so damn long. I am trying hard to make it shorter here. Edit: I failed big time. Whatever, here we go lmao

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!

- The cast is lovely. Initially not that fond of Depp being cast as Grindelwald (though not for the controversial reasons people wont stop bitching about) he has absolutely grown on me over the two years and it was worth it. He is sinister. He is calm and collected. Not over the top. He and his followers murder a couple in Paris to take over their home. Then they find they have a baby boy and... they murder him off screen too. Very chilling. 

- Queenie Goldstein. Not a character I connect with, but I don’t hate her at all. I just don’t know what to think. But Alison is wonderful and I personally love the dark twist her story takes. And she goes willingly with Grindelwald was a surprise to me. It broke my heart on Jacob’s behalf wow. That was rough.

- Newt Scamander. Despite obviously being my favorite and I completely adore him - I was still absolutely surprised how wonderful he is in this movie. He is just such a delight and Eddie is just gorgeous. Inside out. Can’t take my eyes off him. He’s funny, but not in a cracking jokes all the time way, but neither in a making a fool out of him for his awkwardness either? It was just such a spot on portrayal even superior to the first movie and he absolutely got the most laugh and love from the audience along with Jacob. This was absolutely what I needed the very most from a character I relate so much with.

- Jacob Kowalski. Again, there’s a reason why Dan Fogler points out his bromance with Newt in this movie. It’s the heart of it all. It’s funny, it’s warm and it entirely endearing. Jacob spends the movie almost like a guide for Newt on how to approach Tina and talk to her because Newt is just terrible at this. And it leads to just amazing scenes both between the boys, but also Newt and Tina. 

- Tina Goldstein. Oh she’s not going easy on Newt at first, but you understand pretty quickly that it’s her way to put up a shield to protect herself. She is very much her own character though don’t worry about that! Both Newt and Tina are given a chance to evolve a bit but also be themselves before a relationship which is a good thing. The Archive scenes in the French Ministry (fondly named Salamander Eyes by fans because of the song playing) is amazing for Newtina fans. No there’s no kiss. No touches, but it doesn’t need that because it is downright amazing and unexpectedly funny. Jacob has already told Newt not to talk about her eyes reminding him of salamanders, but of course he starts talking about it before going “I’m not supposed to tell you” and the whole scene is just delightful. It really ends with Tina herself totally getting it and finishes to compliment for him. After that there’s not much time for romance, but she warms up to him and work together and is therefore the ONLY canon ship in this movie not at a terrible place at the end!

- Credence and Nagini. I’m going to say it as it is. I am not invested in Credence. I don’t particularly like him. Though it’s better off in this movie than the first. But while the moment when he met his old nanny or whatever was lovely, it dragged on. I just didn’t care enough and wanted to get back to literally anyone else. Claudia Kim as Nagini though is captivating. She’s absolutely stunning and like with Eddie it’s not just because she’s beautiful to look at. Just, captivating.

- Albus Dumbledore! His introduction scene is fantastic and the lovely little music playing. Wonderful. He talks about the view and conjures the fog and we know the following scenes with him trying to convince Newt to go to Paris. Eddie and Jude has wonderful chemistry and plays off each other absolutely great! Jude makes a far more likeable Dumbledore. Not to say the old actors were bad, but I’m not really a Potterhead either so I don’t particularly care. 

- Theseus Scamander and Leta Lestrange. Not in it as much as I thought, but I am certain their screentime is less than what it felt like. I adored Theseus. I did expect to like him, but that he’d be so lovely? Wow. I’ll talk about him and Newt further down. Leta was also wonderful. I am not a huge fan of Zoe Kravitz, but girl can act and she gives Leta a whole lot of heart and... she does meet her end in this movie as I expected. I did get the feeling that she would be a one movie character.

- The soundtrack. Wow. Of course I listened to it once it was released. I am very fond of listening to movie soundtracks and while the first one was good, this one is more complete. It’s full songs from full scenes, not cut to pieces from all around the movie. It’s epic, it’s cute, it’s sad, it’s... it has everything. I got to say the Salamander Eyes helped make it’s scene so magical. ‘Wands to the Earth’ and ‘Spread the World’ are the epic ones. Like massively so. Chills down my arms and legs. And big shit going down on screen.

- Creatures. Can’t have a review of a Fantastic Beasts movie without mentioning the beasts eh? I did miss Dougal and the Occamys, but there were new wonderful creatures here. Favorites being baby nifflers of course. Wildely adorable! The Kelpie scene is wonderful and Newt with wet shirt and Bunty suggesting him to take his shirt off was hilarious btw. But the very favorite was the ZouWu. I was enchanted by that creature from the moment we first saw it in the Comic Con trailer. Wonderful creature. Wonderful interactions with Newt. And the Niffler from the first movie. Adorable as ever and even robs Grindelwald at the end. I did worry for it’s life there, but phew! Survial!

- Newt/Leta/Theseus. You’ll be glad to hear there really isn’t a love triangle going on here at all. In fact Newt don’t seem to have no issue with his brother and childhood friend being engaged at all. In fact he humorusly points out that he’s set to be the best man (HEARTBREAK). A curious moment though near the end. We get a close up of Newt, then cut to Leta saying “I love you” before camera cuts to Newt and Theseus. Both of them. Leaving it a bit “Was it meant for Newt or Theseus?”, but afterwards I think it was giving a double meaning. “I love you” to Newt for the years of friendship. “I love you” to Theseus for his romantic love. It was very touching as she then dies. But yes people will start bitching about woman dying for a man and “male tears” as well as people being racist for killing her. 

- Theseus and Newt. Now this one was the big delightful shock alongside Newt’s character. Based on trailers and promos we are led to believe the brothers’ relationship is very strained, but in fact it’s quite lovely. Theseus shows a lot of love for Newt from the get go. Yeah there’s the “Be less like you” moment, but they’re brothers. That’s hardly the worst thing one has said to a sibling trust me. Theseus also hugs Newt quite adorable in which Newt’s like O_O Eh? Without hugging back, but it allows Theseus to whisper that he’s being followed. Theseus isn’t the one chasing after Newt. He only does that once Newt polyjuices himself to look like Theseus in the French Ministry XD Of course the heartbreaker is at the end when everything is over and they get a moment where Theseus has in fact lost his fiance. Newt goes over and hugs him and tells him he’s on his side now. Just wonderful. I am every bit a lover of bromance and this movie gave me so much of it with Theseus and Newt and Newt and Jacob.

- I’m going to try to sum it up here. The minor cast is wonderful too. I quite liked Kama. The young Newt and Leta are great. McGonagall being alive and an adult is not explained at all unless I completely lost out on something. The editing is terrible in this movie and the pacing is a bit off. Some scenes are quite rushed, but at the same time the movie feels long. But not in a bad way. It’s just some editing are weird. Like one moment they are in the sewers, they hear the zou wu roar and suddenly they’re in the streets for a minute clip perhaps and it’s all done so quickly. Which is a pity because it’s a lovely scene. I also wish they had made more out of the fact that Newt’s book titled “FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM” weren’t made more fuss about. Like, it’s the title of the first movie man? 

So it has it’s flaws and I understand why people that are not into these movies wouldn’t really follow on here. I mean I’m not a Potterhead so I didn’t understand the last twist of the movie before someone told me. But in the end the good outweights the bad so far. It’s a very rewatchable movie because so much happens. Too much even, but still. I love a movie that gives and gives even after watching it many times. 

Go watch it yourself. Make up your own mind. I will be watching it again tonight already XD

[angryzilla]

Here’s a masterlist of all my Fantastic Beasts fanfictions — I go by as na_shao (little_fella) on AO3.

» Pressed into the gravel, pressed into the dirt, pressing against each other in an effort to make the minutes stop (M)

Word count: 6991 / 11 chapters — this fic has been discontinued

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, graphic depictions of torture, recovery, fix-it

Description: He knows it’s the darkest magic he has ever faced in his life when he stumbles upon Gellert Grindelwald sitting on his sofa.

» Now high above your golden veins (the life, the life, the life) (E)

Word count: 2515 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff and angst, porn with feelings, mentions of PTSD

Description: People can get used to anything out of spite and worry; he feels like it is the only thing he's learned that's of any use from his own story; and too soon, too soon the cold could kill the last blooms of roses and hydrangea but he will never let it happen to Percival.

» Through the silence of fireflies (E)

Word count: 1449 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff and smut, lingerie, mentions of PTSD

Description: Grace, and wonder, and the overwhelming realisation that Credence is his, with a ring on his finger, with dawn breathing in his lungs and a cold kiss to lessen the blow of the past.

» Long beside the bitter of the skin (tomorrow won’t know when to begin) (E)

Word count: 2365 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff and angst, blowjobs, mentions of PTSD, mentions of past violent events, healer!Credence

Description: His scarf is knotted over his mouth before he lowers it to his neck again, wanting to feel the rush of icy wind. The snow bites into his face, prickling the rim of the head where the hair starts coming out. The drifting accumulation and fragments of bone taken from the wound. A slash of blood against snowy fields. There are days where it’s hard to care about ordinary things.

» Every moment undone (implosions of beauty back to where we begun) (M)

Word count: 1356 / Part of the Kalopsia series

Tags / warnings: Alternate Universe (canon divergence), modern AU (still magical universe), PSTD, Graves is emotionally constipated, Angry cloud Credence

Description: "Why are you handing me this?” Credence mumbles with his cigarette between his lips as he points at the sweater Graves is offering, dark eyebrow arched; the floor under the soles of his shoes feels incoherent, as if asphalt cracks were being pushed apart in every direction. ”I thought you hated my guts.” ”When did I say that?” Graves grumbles back, arm still stretched out with the material clenched between the flesh-shaped tan of his fingers.

» Where the roses grow (T)

Word count: 856 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: Aftermath of torture, post-Grindelwald, established relationship, mentions of torture and violence, PTSD, healing

Description: Unexpectedly, autumn nights brought a new sense of joy under their wing. It took nearly a year of intensive care and rehabilitation for Graves to go back home after Credence, Theseus and a team of Aurors found him bathing in his own blood.

» I’m all but washed (in the tide of her breathing) (G)

Word count: 1024 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: Genderswap, fluff, super married ladies

Description: She reaches long arms around her; her blooming Prussian blue rose, her darling ink-spilled sky of silver constellations— and Constance feels a presence behind her a split second before there’s an arm snaking its way around her stomach, pressing very gently; the Obscurus sparks up from the sweater-framed back in rolls of gasoline dust and crackling, sizzling little bolts of lightning, until it recognises the bearer of those hands (a compass, a path, a polestar)—

» And there’ll be sun, sun, sun all down our necks (G)

Word count: 256 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: Fluff, established relationship

Description: “You’re going to fry your brain if you stay there all afternoon,” Percival says softly, leaning down to kiss Credence’s forehead before he extends a hand toward the younger man. “Come swim with me?” As Credence grabs his hand and manages to stand on his feet, he pulls Percival to him; their mouths meet easily under the burning summer sun, and Credence’s lips are cold against his, eager to be tasted and messed with.

» Closer and closer, we’re crashing ships in the night (E)

Word count: 424 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: Gratuitous smut, discovering they have feelings, breaking up & making up

Description: They break up on a Monday evening and Theseus slaps him so hard that Percival’s cheek blooms purple in the days that follow. They make it up on a Friday morning two years later and Theseus is sprawled on Percival’s desk, peach-colored legs spread wide and cock leaking everywhere on the files underneath him.

» And in the flood of morning light — spilling out across your room — you say the words will get there soon (E)

Word count: 1866 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, PTSD, pets, recovery

Description: It starts when he visits Theseus in London, a few months into 1926. “Thes?” “Hmm?” “Your brother’s big cat keeps bothering me.”

» I’m caught in the ropes and the wires; the sun settles hard in the south (M)

Word count: 456 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: PTSD, angst, mentions of blood and severe torture

Description: The water of his bath is cooling and he’s haunted, haunted by demons and images and his inability to even speak; too quiet, bound and falling into a dark, blood-threshed water where ripples are ropes curling around his wrists and ripping the flesh apart only to leave a bloody mess behind as it bites his lungs and he can’t breathe and can’t remember his name, a name, his — something.

» He was born to blow your mind or something along those lines, tonight (E)

Word count: 1239 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: makeup shenanigans, lipstick, smut, fluff

Description: “I miss you wearing lipstick, darling.” Theseus frowns over his cup of tea, his eyelashes pale waves that echo through space. “It was one time at that queer jazz bar. You liked it that much?“ “You looked marvelous with it. I keep thinking about it, from time to time.”

» Trembling hands (E)

Word count: 398 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: angst, war, mentions of blood, graphic description of violence

Description: Smoke pierces his eyes, making tears try to crawl out into the open while dread runs cold in his veins.“You triple fucker,” Theseus sobs while trying to examine the wound, and swears under his breath, “stop moving! I can’t— I can’t do it—”

» Untitled Fratboys AU (E)

Word count: on going — 10k for now, two or three parts; find bits I posted here and here

Tags / warnings: mentions of past abuse at the hands of former partners, mentions of panic attacks and anxiety disorder/depression, a large amount of smut and greasy jokes, fratboys setting, modern AU

Description: Smoke pierces his eyes, making tears try to crawl out into the open while dread runs cold in his veins.“You triple fucker,” Theseus sobs while trying to examine the wound, and swears under his breath, “stop moving! I can’t— I can’t do it—”

» “You killed him!” (E)

Word count: 1276 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: angst, major character death, ANGST (did I already WRITE ANGST already??)

Description: “You killed him!” Theseus shouts, his pale fingers curling around the edge of his wand as he peers around the room, Percival’s body lying in a pool of oxidized blood, almost black at the rim.It blends together with the floor like a film of gasoline spreading all over the asphalt, thick and enveloping and forever snatching whatever was underneath it. Snatched; that’s the word. Percival was snatched from him, was vanished into nothingness before he could even get to him. You failed him.

» The tale of the cute kitten and the wisdom teeth (G)

Word count: 98 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: utter fluff, mega diabetes incoming

Description: Imagine Percival after having his wisdom teeth pulled out. Still woozy and loose lipped from the anaesthetics. He becomes very cuddly and giggly mixed with teary at the strangest things (think bursting into tears because a kitten is too fluffy and cute).

» The one where he gets Theseus’ little brother’s approval (G)

Word count: 515 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff, fluff, fluff

Description: Theseus and Newt are really close. When Percival gathers up the courage to try to court Theseus he knows he’ll have to win over not just Newt but also his creatures too otherwise Theseus would never be amenable. So Percival gets ready to face off against hostile, wild creatures (which includes Newt). He’s surprised that instead Newt willingly helps him court his brother and even offers the assistance of his creatures.

» Not every soul will sink like the setting sun (E)

Word count: 2463 / One-Shot written for Day 4 of the first edition of @fantasticsmutbeastsweek — In Public / Getting Caught

Tags / warnings: blood, war, blowjob, in public, mention of trauma, mention of bullet injury, oral sex, established relationship, mention of alcohol, dumb aurors in love 

Description: “Fuck this shit,” he manages to grunt in disbelief, blood rushing through the arteries still, “‘m not dying on the goddamn battlefield.” “I’ll haunt you until I drive your ghost fucking crazy if you do,” a familiar voice rises behind him, and suddenly colours explode back before Theseus’ eyelids.There’s warm pressure against his head, the rough pads of fingers touching the sensitive skin of his neck; the nudge of a tongue against his teeth.

» Collapse (T)

Word count: 728 / part 1; part 2 being What must be broken is left to rearrange

Tags / warnings: mentions of torture, PTSD, Percival wants to protect Theseus and is dumb, feelings, angst

Description: Theseus knows that he’s lying, and Percival knows that he knows. Where in Hell did he think his partner in— pretty much everything would buy the whole I’m fine, please don’t worry, just a few broken bones?It’s here, the look of hurt and disappointment, and it’s tangible, and he feels it pull at his chest. “I don’t hate you. I hate that after all of this, you’re still trying to lie to me, Perce.”

» What must be broken is left to rearrange (T)

Word count: 1108 / follow-up to Collapse

Tags / warnings: mentions of torture, PTSD, Percival wants to protect Theseus and is dumb, feelings, angst

Description: Collapsed, but not defeated. Rise. Percival is kneeling by his side, looking down at him, eyes dark with worry, breathing fast as if he had run miles and miles to get to him. Theseus can see a few bandages poke out from underneath his hospital gown where it’s open and it makes his stomach churn; they’re a proof that he took so long to make it through to him, to this disgusting cell he was kept in, in his own living room, in his own home.

» “I sleep with the boss” / “I am the boss” (T)

Word count: 307 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: married couple, established relationship, a LOT OF FUN, sexy innuendos

Description: MACUSA as a whole has gotten used to it, really. Queenie nods absently at Percival as she places his mug of coffee on his desk, trying to pass off as listening, but really just biting off her lower lip as to avoid laughing in her boss’ face. “So, you’re the boss today?” she asks softly, cheeks a gentle pink under the harsh yellow lights of the office.

» Real or not real? (G)

Word count: 1403 / written for the @fantasticbeastscalendar

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, angst with a happy ending, dissociation, aftermath of torture

Description: “Let’s do something,” Theseus says, and licks his lips, pressing them together before speaking up again. “Ask me things, things only the real Theseus Scamander can know.”

» Everything starts to rewind (G)

Word count: 735 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, food, chubby!Graves, angst with a happy ending, aftermath of torture, Aurors In Love

Description: Graves manages to furtively eat another slice of cake while Theseus’ back is turned, forkfuls shoved inside his mouth at the speed of light. Theseus is willing to turn a blind eye to this because Percival went through hell and came back so thin his lover wondered how he even made it through alive.

» A waltz in your bloodstream (E)

Word count: 2538 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff and smut, domestic fluff, smears of angst, slice of life, porn with feelings

Description: “He’s one to keep,” his step-father had said in the dying violet hour of their home in Bath. “He likes apple pie. He’s a good person.” Theseus let out a laugh. “It’s not just about liking pies, Dad.” If only liking apple pie made this world worthwhile for all its flaws and clouds of despair.

» There'll never be an end to our journey (E)

Word count: 1495 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff and smut, domestic fluff, weddings, uniform worship, body worship and praise

Description: Theseus has to stifle a giggle when Percival pushes him on the bed and nearly falls flat on the floor in his haste of worshipping his uniform-clothed husband, the most gorgeous sight to have ever graced his eyes in a long time. “I’m sorry,” Percival mumbles apologetically to him, afraid of having broken the moment, but Theseus catches him by the wrist, still laughing.

» The one with a broken ankle (T)

Word count: 596 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff, domestic fluff, fun times

Description: Percival Graves is the kind of person who if they break their ankle they would use the crutch to play office golf. Theseus Scamander is the kind of person who would get jealous and want a broken ankle just so he too could play office golf with his crutch.

» Tomorrow (G)

Word count: 1010 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: heavy angst, amnesia fic, established relationship, implied heavy torture

Description: It doesn’t sit right with him, the reason why Graves would visit him every single day just because his leg got shattered to pieces in a mission.

» But you’re losing your words (we’re speaking in bodies) (E)

Word count: 1380 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: smut smut smut, daddy kink, desk sex

Description: "Come on, Newt. Of course you like calling me Daddy." The shades are drawn in Percival’s home office, the only light being of the desk lamp, warm and orange, pouring in, pouring everywhere around them. "Not true," Newt mumbles low, chest pressed against the hardwood of Percival's desk, his dress shirt of almost phosphorescent blue discarded in the chair nearby. "I don't."

» The one where Percival Graves is a father figure to three dragons (G)

Word count: 417 / Incoming second part

Tags / warnings: fluff, chosen family, Graves is a sap with his dragon sons, established relationship

Description: “Winston! Philip! Barnaby! Enough is enough!” Newt shouts through the room as he walks into the meeting Percival is currently holding with his team regarding the process of securing a specific upcoming event Picquery is going to get part of. “Leave your father alone! He’s working!”

» The one where Newt is a cat who takes naps everywhere at MACUSA (G)

Word count: 361 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff, established relationship

Description: Percival is far too tired to find the whole thing anything more than endearing when he finds Newt fast asleep in a corner of his office where sunlight has decided to settle.The older man bites his lip, looks like he’s deciding whether to lie down with his husband or to wake him up until all defenses are lost and he can’t help but curl up in the mazoologist’s arms.

» It’s a question of style (G)

Word count: 306 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: fluff, established relationship, a lot of fun

Description: “I feel like your husband is very stylish,” a junior Auror says to Percival one day as he helps her review one of her upcoming missions. “His curls are so— bouncy and wonderful! I can never quite get that myself. ”Percival chuckles, and for a moment, the poor junior thinks she has made a giant mistake. “Oh, Martha, if only you knew.”

» We’ll lay here for years or for hours (your hand in my hand, so still and discreet) (E)

Word count: 666 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: smut smut smut, implied ot3, blowjobs, body worship

Description: ”I see that a certain Percival has been feeding you well while I was away,” Theseus grins as he bites into Credence’s creamy thigh, generous and plump, everything Theseus happens to love in him.

» We left footprints in the slush of ourselves (E)

Word count: 41821 / on going; 4 chapters

Tags / warnings: angst, emotional hurt, post-Grindelwald, unhealthy coping mechanisms, PTSD, past child abuse, fix-it, recovery, coming together

Description: His skull is fucking cracked.Not actually cracked, mind you— or maybe it has been, for all it’s worth, and he hasn’t remembered yet. But it’s been split open and left for dead in that dirty cell of hell, and he hasn’t gotten it back. (Or how Percival eventually heals with Theseus and Credence. In which Theseus comes back to New York after Graves’ abduction at the hands of Grindelwald and moves in with him; Credence is lost and found, very angry and confused.)

» The one where Theseus needs comfort (T)

Word count: 523 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, PTSD

Description: Credence adjusts the blanket around Theseus’ shoulders gently, and he didn’t need to, really, the blanket being fine as it was; but it’s more about the gesture and the reassurance, the unspoken I’m here spelt between the lines. He doesn’t even mention the redness around his eyes, and for that, the Brit is grateful— Credence is like that, able to see past the wound in order to focus on the stitches there are to tighten.

» Exhale (G)

Word count: 2663 / One-Shot co-written with @maggieandthedragon

Tags / warnings: mild gore, hurt/comfort, PTSD, flashbacks

Description: Something about the way his Auror had slumped against the wall, blood leaking from his mouth had reminded him of Sam Crispin hung on concertina wire, bleeding and twitching in no man’s land as the gray sky clotted in his blood and flowers burnt all around. [Or: Theseus doesn't carry all of his scars on his skin. But at least he's not carrying them alone.]

» But the stars weren’t wrong, the time felt right (E)

Word count: 3001 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, Hanukkah, jewish holidays, fluff

Description: Feeling lulled by Percival’s thumb slipping back and forth across his temple, Credence breathes in deeply, curling his arms around Theseus, snuggles into his warmth. “Hanukkah is the festival of lights and we celebrate it to commemorate the rededication of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem.”

» We’ll find how to make it with the rain; this rage will lead us through the burning plains (E)

Word count: 1731 / One-Shot

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff, smut

Description: A kiss on his forehead; different hands at once on his cheeks (rough and calloused; thinner and irregular with welt bumps). “I know you’re awake.” Theseus opens his eyes and settles his emerald gaze upon the face peering down at him— lanky fingers curling in the deepening sheets, shadows blue with the cloudy, purplish day in London; and the windows grow thick with fog.

» And I heard you say, let’s lose ourselves out here always (E)

Word count: 4024 / One-Shot co-written with @maggieandthedragon

Tags / warnings: hurt/comfort, fluff, smut, post-WWII

Description: For Credence, the end of the war came in a brief flare of green smoke and the flutter of a piece of paper. The ripe scent of Floo flame-- melted paint, scorched wood, herbal and worn-- drifted through too big flat and he slid off the couch to go read it. It’s done. Home soon. -- PGG the neatly folded note read, as if Credence somehow couldn’t recognize his lover’s handwriting after eighteen years. An anticlimax in swooping calligraphy. After decades of anxiety as Grindelwald’s influence grew on the continent, nearly two years of fear as the United Kingdom went to war and MACUSA dithered and fought amongst itself before finally leaping into the fray. But it was done and Percival and Theseus would come home weary in body and soul and the least he could do was give his lovers a haven.

» Munich, 1929 (E)

Word count: 146 / co-written with @fractalspaces, edit by me

Tags / warnings: smut, angst, have unexpected feels

Description: There are cracks, sometimes, and eyes opened that show the deepest sadness— a sadness engraved in granite and bitterness; something much bigger than what they had, if they had anything at all.

» I’m the scrapes of iron your skin breathes (E)

Word count: 579 / One-Shot + playlist

Tags / warnings: murder husbands, disturbing imagery

Description: “You know this isn’t meant to last, dearest,” Grindelwald murmurs in his ear with a vice-like grip around his aching shoulder. “I have never expected more than that.” It’s a lie.

» The Impossible Winner

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves

Description: A dark post-Grindelwald mix about Graves’ recovery. Can be listened as a stand alone or linked to my Thesivaldence fic We left footprints in the slush of ourselves.

» I can feel it breathe

Character / Pairing: Credence Barebone

Description: An exploration of Credence’s Obscurus and of his anger.

» I’m the scrapes of iron your skin breathes

Character / Pairing: Gellert Grindelwald / Percival Graves

Description: An accompanying mix for the written piece of the same name.

» You, you turn the oceans into streams

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Newt Scamander (Gramander)

» Liminal Spaces

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Theseus Scamander / Credence Barebone (Thesivaldence)

Fic by @fractalspaces, edit by me

» Should’ve Known From My First Breath

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Credence Barebone (Gradence)

Fic by @fractalspaces , edit by me

» Revenant

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Credence Barebone (Gradence)

Fic by @myheadsamesssogimmetheslash, edit by me

» A bunch of married grumpy rabbits

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Theseus Scamander (Thesival)

Fic & moodboard by me

» Contain this or it will mean war

Character / Pairing: Seraphina Picquery

Commission for @letclestrcnge

» Wake up

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Theseus Scamander (Thesival)

Fic & moodboard by me

» Cross my heart and hope to die

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Theseus Scamander (Thesival)

Fic & moodboard by me

» Life to come

Character / Pairing: Percival Graves / Theseus Scamander / Credence Barebone (Thesivaldence)

Fic & moodboard by me

» Ko-Fi «