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falloutjuli · 1 year ago

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Thanks to my beloved fellow unhinged Chuuya simps, I wrote this monster. Please do let me know if youre interested in more domestic malewife Chuuya, because woo boy was this fun to write. <3

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Chuuya Nakahara x Reader - Domestic Adventures Wordcount: 4,7k Short summary: Chuuya, being the kind man he is, gives you an empty room after moving together to do with whatever you like. While he is gone over the weekend, you get to know his subordinates and take him up on that offer. Warnings: NONE - Reader is an socially awkward mess, Chuuya being a cutie, author is too dumb to propperly proofread, author is unsure at this point what sap means, but also doesnt get a clear answer from google, so she will let it stand the way it is.

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"Chuuya... I eh.. that's really kind, but seriously I dont-'' Rudely you were interrupted by a chaste kiss that your favorite ginger pressed into your lips.

"No back-talking. I insist you take it and make it yours. I never used it for anything anyway. Was planning to turn it into a wine room perhaps but it serves a way better purpose as your room." You looked at him, annoyed, a sigh escaping your lips.

"But you like wine." You mused, trying to convince him again, but he was a stubborn man after all. "Yeah, but I like you more, doll. And you moved into my apartment, so I think it's fair you get a room where you can destress and take a break from me if you ever need one."

Leaving your side he picked up his hat from the kitchen island, before coming up behind you, pressing a few kisses to your neck.

"I'm leaving my credit card with you, the pin if you need it is our anniversary. And since I unfortunately have work to do, I have two of my subordinates waiting outside if you want to go anywhere. They will also gladly help you with anything regarding the room, just ask yeah?"

You looked at the room one last time, before turning around to hug him. "Okay. I'll see what I do with this room. Be careful okay?"

He nodded, kissing you one last time before leaving out the door. His heart ached each time he had to leave for a while, especially over the weekends but it also gave you time to fully focus on this project and he was more than excited to see what you'd do.

Back inside the apartment that now was your home too, you really were unsure what to do. Being given a rather spacious room to do whatever you want with it... that was a new thing.

But it wasn't like you had no Pinterest boards filled with room inspos. Scrolling through them while drinking tea helped you to get a better idea of what you wanted to do.

So a little paint would be needed, some furniture, and loads of tiny decorations. But how would you even manage to paint, the last time was when you moved into your old apartment, and that sucked majorly.

Remembering that your trusty boyfriend had left his subordinates with you, you could ask them perhaps. After getting ready to go out you went out into the spacious hallway that lead to the apartment, where two men dressed in black suits were already standing.

"Um, hey." You said awkwardly. Could you even ask hardened mafia members to please help you paint a room? Well, you'd find out now. The burly guys nodded, signaling you to continue, no emotion readable on their faces.

"Well, I was planning to paint a room and I wondered if it was alright to ask for your help?"

"We'll do anything you ask of us, that was Nakahara-san's instruction." The blond one said, adjusting his sunglasses.

"I figured, but still, I want to ask, if you don't want to, you won't have to."

The ensuing silence felt awkward as you shifted from one foot to the other.

"Is the paint already inside or do you need an escort to the city first?" The brown-haired one asked and you responded with a weird ramble of all the things you would need and places you planned on going to.

"Well, we better get going then right?" The blond one said and guided you over to the elevators.

It wasn't long before you sat in the backseat of one of the Port Mafia's Standart black cars, with your new companions sitting in the front. The ride was silent and you kept accidentally meeting their gazes whenever they went to look in the rear mirror to check in on you.

"(L/N)-san?" The brunette spoke up, making you cringe a little being addressed so formally.

"Just Y/N is fine!" You said.

"Right, Y/N, you can always call a friend if you want to have someone more familiar with you. We can pick them up on the way." You shook your head.

"No, it's alright."

You'd rather not subject your friends to suddenly seeing you with an entourage since most didn't even know you're dating a Mafioso. You had lied and told them he was working a government job and therefore needed his privacy.

So far no one had ever questioned you further about your elusive boyfriend and you preferred it to stay that way.

The first stop at Ikea made you grateful Chuuya had left these guys with you, since it was really helpful having four strong extra hands who lifted heavy packages and drove the carts around for you.

You still wanted to disappear in a hole whenever customers or workers turned their head, watching you with confused expressions but yeah, you'd need to get used to that now.

Chuuya was overprotective and now that it was more apparent that you belonged to him, there was no chance you'd have much alone time while out and about. Somehow the Mafia would always have an eye on you, even if it's just to calm Chuuyas mind.

"We scanned everything in, you can now pay." The blond said and you nudged past the many cartons to hold Chuuyas card to the card reader that happily asked you for the pin.

Typing in your anniversary date made the window close and a long paper came rushing out. You quickly collected it, stuffing it in your purse before you and your companions went back outside. Just outside the building, you noticed there was no way in hell all the new stuff would fit.

"Hey eh, guys, how are we gonna get this to Chuuyas?" You asked and the guys exchanged looks, obviously not having considered that either.

"I'll stay here, make a call and deliver them in a while, you go and pick up the rest." The brown-haired one offered, making you immediately feel bad.

"But won't that be... boring or rude?" You asked but he shook his head. "It won't take long, don't worry." You nodded and waved goodbye, following the blond to the car.

Once back on the road you finally asked what had been on your mind.

"Mind if I ask your name? It feels weird not knowing who's driving me around and all." You said and you spotted a smile from the rear mirror. "Sato and the other guy is Hiro."

You nodded, the awkwardness still barely fleeting.

While picking up the paint and anything else needed to mount the furniture later you and Sato fell into some Smalltalk. Nothing deep or noteworthy, just anything to ensure no awkward silence could take place again as it drove you up the walls.

The ever so slim fear that these guys could tell Chuuya how much of an awkward mess you were had a chokehold on you.

After being sure you had everything needed for the start, you two drove back, only stopping by a bakery you spotted near your new home.

When you were finally back in the familiar four walls of your home, you saw that Hiro had been a busy bee, by having gotten all the new furniture already up and inside.

"Oh wow, thank you so much." You said and placed the bakery goods on the kitchen island. Meanwhile, your new Mafia friends, if they could be considered that even, sorted things away and then quickly grabbed everything to start painting Soon.

"So what's the plan?" Hiro asked you eventually and had you pull up the references you picked out.

"You guys think you can manage that?"

"Don't doubt our capability." They humored you and got to work, while you began putting together the little nick-nacks that would soon find home in the room.

Around the early evening, you made tea and coffee for the two men and served some of the cake you got earlier, which the two thanked you wholeheartedly for.

Even later again, they called it quits, the room now colored just how you wanted it. "Wow, that's perfect! Thank you two so much." You beamed at them and though they would never admit it, they felt glad you enjoyed it.

"Well, it'll need to dry overnight before we put in the furniture tomorrow, so we will leave you to it for tonight, alright?" Hiro stated and you bid your goodbyes, now once more alone in the spacious apartment that currently was inhabited by Swedish packages, and loads of decorations, only waiting to find their place soon.

Yeah, this was all coming together.

The next morning started slow, the bed always felt the worst if Chuuya wasn't in it with you, but you managed to pull it together once you were munching on your breakfast. Especially when a quick message pops up on your phone.

Chuu Chuu: Thinking about you

He was a sap, even if he'd never admit it. It was tiny gestures like these that had you know how much he loved you. Even when he was away on missions or errands, he tried to find the time to let you know his heart was with you.

Same here. Can't wait to see you again.

You replied and put it down to walk to your front door which had just been knocked on, opening it to be met with the two guys from yesterday.

"Morning." You said and they replied the same, as you let them in. "Coffee, tea, anything I can offer you guys?" You asked, still feeling guilty for taking advantage of the fact that Chuuya had ordered them to fulfill your every wish.

"Am fine for now, what about you?" Hiro asked Sato, who agreed to not need anything.

You shrugged and watched as the two inspected the now-dried walls in your room, then making plans on the next steps.

"Need any help?" You chimed in, but again, the two declined.

"No need. Enjoy your morning Y/N." You nodded slowly and sat back down on the red, expensive couch with your tea, while scrolling through your phone.

Ever so often you'd look up, watching the two Mafiosi rip open packages, bicker about what they'd do first, and carry things around.

Soon little to no big packages were left, Sato and Hiro currently working on a bookshelf, when your scrolling was interrupted by a phone call from Chuu Chuu. Surprised you picked up immediately.

"Hey, didn't think I'd hear from you so soon." You said, getting up to satisfy the odd urge to walk around while talking.

"I currently have a little downtime before I'm probably am right back in the middle of annoying shit, so I called my doll. How is the room progress coming along? Are the guys helping you?"

You slyly took a peak in said room, watching the almost finished bookshelf and replied; "Yeah, going great. At this rate you won't even see any trace of package material." You laughed and he chuckled along too.

"I cannot wait to see you again. I miss you." He sighed, his longing clearly audible.

"Chuu, it's been barely twenty-four hours."

"And? Even a minute without you inflicts me more pain than any other wound I have received over the years." You bit your lip, trying to not laugh. If anyone knew the scary gravity manipulator and Mafia executive was one of the most domestic and sappy guys you knew, no one would believe you.

"You're exaggerating."

"Perhaps a little. But my point still stands. I'll treat you to dinner on Monday when I'm back alright?" You leaned on the kitchen island, a dreamy smile plastered across your face and you could only imagine that Chuuya must look similar.

"Alright. See you Monday yeah? I don't wanna keep you from work. Watch out for yourself." You said.

It felt unnecessary to tell him to be careful, he was the strongest man you knew, but you still said it. And while you did it, Chuuya appreciated it each time.

"Of course. The same goes for you. I love you Doll."

"Love ya too Chuuya." And then there was silence, except for the hammering coming from the room. A sigh escaped your lips.

Fuck, him calling you only made you miss him like crazy. How cruel of him.

It only took another hour after Chuuya had checked in with you, for Sato and Hiro to have finished building and placing all the furniture. They watched you inspect the room and felt relieved when you gave them a thumbs-up.

They were kind enough even to help you sort in all your stuff, the new plants, lights, books, figures, even when you had said multiple times that it wouldn't be necessary.

As you poked a fork into your takeout you finally asked the two, "Don't you like... I dunno, get bored of hanging around me..?"

Looking up from their portions, they immediately shook their head.

"Not really. Even if, we couldn't complain since Nakahara-san gave us this order, and the order is to "keep his most priced possession safe"." The three of you finished the sentence, imitating Chuuya.

Yeah, he really was obsessed with your safety ever since he knew he wanted you by his side. Well, being in Chuuyas Highranking Mafia position, he of course had enemies and while you knew you could be targeted just to get to him, you always found him to get a little too paranoid.

Sure, he had lost so much already and was afraid of losing again, but you weren't a child. Though you still appreciated his concern and knew he'd never trap you, make you depend on him or anything, he simply wanted your safety assured so his mind was calmer.

You knew him too well by now.

"Well, thanks anyways for all the help! Don't think I could have gotten the whole thing done this quick without you." The two guys smiled at you, nodding their heads.

The evening soon came to an end as you declared you'd take a bath and then go to bed, feeling exhausted even if you barely did much today.

Sato and Hiro bid their goodbyes, telling you they will check in tomorrow around noon for your well-being and then left to keep guard around the block.

Once more, an evening alone. It was spent with some snacks in front of the TV, catching up on some series that Chuuya wasn't interested in.

It was a nice distraction from the now lonely feeling in the apartment. When you could barely keep your eyes open, you decided it was time for bed.

Sinking into the luxurious and spacious bed, you fell asleep right in the middle, hugging Chuuyas pillow close to you, his scent slowly lulling you into a well-rested sleep.

Well, the well-rested was a lie. You had woken up, groggy and exhausted, despite having slept rather long. Thanks bunch weird nightmares that don't even make sense.

With a hot mug in hand, you took pictures of the room, sending it to your friends to flex a little.

Youre kidding? Holy shit that looks so cool?

Does your bf have a brother or something?

A whole ass room to yourself? Wow you really finally got lucky. When are we finally gonna meet him?

You hated that question. Chuuya had told you countless times since moving together that you were more than welcome to invite people, but you always felt uncomfortable in a weird way.

First off, you didn't wanna come across as a sugar baby. This whole apartment screamed money and luxury and then there was you, a regular person from Yokohama, that'd beg questions.

Second, you liked to keep Chuuya away from your relationships with other people. He wasn't the only worrywart in your relationship. You simply felt uncomfortable, possibly spilling what Chuuyas occupation actually was.

Sure, it sucked having to always plan meet-ups elsewhere, but you liked it better that way.

Soon perhaps. He's currently out working over the weekend

You replied and watched as your friends flooded your phone, jealous that you seemingly found the perfect guy™.

Chuckling you sat down on the new couch in your room, putting on the LED lights.

Yeah, you could get used to this.

Maybe it was good that Chuuya didn't relent.

It was already pitch back outside when Chuuya parked his motorcycle in the garage of his apartment complex. He was spent. But back a whole day earlier.

He could still have a nice relaxing Sunday evening with you, and that was all he currently wanted. He checked his phone for the report from Hiro, which had him chuckling as he rode the elevator up.

They are truly a sweetheart. You made a good catch Nakahara-san.

He had expected nothing else. Your kindness and irresistible smile was what had him at his knees all the way back then and he had suspected that even his subordinates would like you.

Sighing contently, he unlocked the apartment door and when you didn't immediately rush to him, he figured you must be occupied or aren't hearing the rustling of him taking his coat, shoes and hat off.

The dinner he had picked up on the way was placed in the open kitchen and spotting colorful lights coming from the room he left to you, he knew where to find you.

But first he got rid of his second jacket, vest and leather accessories, remaining in only his white dress shirt and black dress pants. Creeping up to the open door, he knocked before entering, finding you playing video games on a new couch.

The shocked expression as you pulled your earbuds out warmed his heart, especially when you broke into a huge grin.

"But it's not Monday." You said and got up to embrace him. Hugging you tightly and enjoying just having you in his arms he finally replied; "Worked extra hard to get back quicker. Can't leave my doll all alone for so long, now can I?"

His hands found your face, holding it still, while he pressed kisses all over it, until he eventually, finally, kissed your lips.

After enjoying the sweet sweet bliss you stepped away a little presenting the new room.

"So what you say?" You asked, gauging his reaction. It was your room, but you still wanted him to like it.

"Looks lovely. I really like what you have done with the place. Better than a wine room for sure." He hugged you from behind as he looked around, taking in all the details.

Your favorite books, merch from shows and games you enjoyed, lots of LEDs and fairy lights, plants, a comfortable carpet.

Yeah, it was truly pretty, just like you.

"You know I won't enter unless you give me permission right?"

"You're in here right now and I don't remember giving you permission." you teased him, humming as you swayed from left to right. "You know what I mean."

"I do. And I appreciate it Chuu."

He pressed a kiss to your neck as you pulled him with you to the couch. Quickly spinning around to face him, your hands hooked around his neck, pulling him with you as you let yourself fall down onto the soft material, with Chuuya obviously having used his ability by the way you very softly landed.

Reuniting your lips again and again was now the agenda, the smiles never fading from either of your faces.

When Chuuya then lifted his upper body up, you looked at him puzzled.

"I brought food." Pulling him back down, you kissed him again, your tongue softly swiping over his and he gladly opened his own mouth to let your tongues meet.

Your hands moved from lovingly brushing your thumbs over his cheeks to his soft hair, playing with some strands, which had him groan into your mouth.

He was a mess in your hands when you played with the ginger locks. It took minutes until you pulled away, and when you looked at your boyfriend his pupils were blown wide. You loved having this effect on him.

"Want to eat now?" He asked and you contemplated. On the one hand... making out with him ... on the other... food.

"What did you have for lunch even?" He asked and you looked to the side.

"Nothing." You whispered but he heard you well and got up immediately, pulling you to the kitchen.

"Nothing? Yeah, no, you're gonna eat now." Rolling your eyes you still helped getting cutlery, glasses, and drinks to then finally sit down and eat.

It was a quiet dinner, like always, the only extra thing was Chuuya seeking out your hand to fold while he continued eating.

How could a man become so touch-starved after having been away for barely 48 hours? You couldn't imagine how bad it'd be once he'd be needed to get out of the country.

"What's got your mind running?" He asked, having noticed that you only poked your food with a smile on your lips.

"Oh just this really cute guy I know." "Oh." He mused, feeling up for the game. "He must be a pretty great catch if he's got you smiling like that."

Digging around in his pockets, he found his phone and started playing music over the stereo. You chuckled when he got up, inviting you to dance with him.

"Oh he is..." you murmured as Chuuya pulled you close, swaying with you softly to the music.

"Respects me, makes me smile, always puts my comfort first, insists even that I get a to have a personal room in his luxury apartment."

"Well, that does sound nice. Hope he's good-looking." You laughed as he dipped you, your head tilting all the way back as you couldn't meet his gaze. You know he was smirking waiting for an answer.

"Well..." You started as pulled you back up, straight into his chest. "He's got reeeal pretty eyes. Like I can get lost in them for ages. Nice and smooth skin, which he better should have, since he spends ages in the bath."

Chuuya laughed about your backhanded comment as he twirled you so your back was pressed against his chest, his hands roaming you still swaying body.

"His hair is also so nice too. I have never seen a haircut like that, but he absolutely rocks it. And the color... reminds me of the most beautiful sunsets."

Having heard enough, you were twirled once more, so Chuuya could lean his forehead against yours.

"What a guy. Do I know him?" You leaned closer to his lips, your breath ghosting over them as you spoke.

"Yeah, it's you, you fool." He broke the last piece of distance kissing you once more. As the song came to an end, he pulled away, only giving your forehead a quick kiss, and then quickly began cleaning up the kitchen.

You sighed as you watched him quickly clean.

"Are you tired?" You asked, knowing that since he came back a whole day earlier he must have been working hard.

"Yeah a little. Been on observation the whole night."

"Then let's get to bed soon, you need some rest." Not wanting to admit to needing that, the ginger waved his hand.

"Soon. Oh yeah, I haven't asked, but you have been alright with my subordinates, right? Like they didn't make you feel uncomfortable or anything?"

You chuckled, crossing your arms over your chest.

"Not at all. They were very sweet. Did they complain about me?"

"Of course not." Chuuya would genuinely like to see someone try and badmouth his partner to him. A laugh escaped him.

"It really seems that I wrap the Mafia about my finger. Are we sure I don't have an ability? The ability to make any mafiosi putty in my hands."

"To test that theory I should get Akutagawa to meet you. If he likes you, then I'll call it an ability." Chuuya immediately shuddered as he imagined the strange situation.

"Never mind that, I prefer you in one piece."

You laughed as he kindly pulled you along into the bedroom, flicking on the light so you both could change into more comfortable clothes.

"In one piece? Is he the eh..." You rummaged through your brain. It was rare that Chuuya was ranting and raving about his higher-ranking colleagues, so you desperately tried to find any information your brain had anchored to "Akutagawa".

"He's the dog guy right?" Chuuya started laughing his ass off, doubling over, he pulled his shirt off. "The silent rabid dog of the Port Mafia. That's what you mean right?"

You felt your face warm up. Wow, you kinda missed the mark.

"Yeah. But don't laugh so much, you kept confusing my best friend with that annoying customer from work!" You said and remember how shocked you had felt when Chuuya had casually offered to order a hit on your best friend, only to find you he had meant the annoying customer that had been bothering you for weeks.

"To be fair, they had really similar names!"

"They really aren't similar." Chuuya pouted and pulled out some jogging pants and a loose t-shirt and changed into them, still chuckling to himself that you called Akutagawa the dog guy.

"I'd prefer if my colleagues don't know much about you." He stated content when his ginger head pushed through his t-shirts opening.

"Why's that?" Instead of answering directly, he pulled you into bed with him, snuggling up to you, relinquishing in everything you had to offer.

"Well, you're mine. Don't want you to see what the Mafia has to offer." You snorted. As if that really was his reasoning, but it gave you another opportunity to stroke his ego.

"Pft, as if anything better than you is walking around there. You're already the Port Mafia finest."

Chuuya pressed a kiss on your hair, his warm hands already stroking your body in a gentle, soothing way.

Comfortable silence ensued, where you two only enjoyed the presence of the other.

This is home.

Chuuya is home. The feeling of being content, comfortable, and warm, Chuuyas simple presence gave all of this to you and he felt very much the same.

Before you, he had little to come home to. He didn't mind working longer, didn't mind doing more work, but ever since he knew you'd be waiting for him, he had cut back, less overtime, less spending the night in a bar and then power napping at the headquarters.

His life was just perfect right now.

And then you speaking about a dog came into his head again.

"Hey, doll... what would you say about getting a dog?"

"Huh?" Confused you looked at him, checking if he was joking.

"I have wanted one for ages but my duties leave me with so little time to properly care. But with you now here... I think we could manage."

"Are you forgetting I'm Working too?" He shook his head, his red locks of hair, bobbing around.

"Of course not. But your work times are actually normal and don't require you to fly out of the country in case of emergency."

"True true..." you mumbled. "And you'd be less alone! When I'm gone you'd at least have a companion."

He was really convincing and the way his eyes sparkled, you could only guess how long and deeply he has longed for a dog.

"That does sound enticing. I'll think about it." A bright smile stretched across Chuuyas face and he immediately peppered you in kisses.

"You're the best." He whispered in-between them, hugging you tighter.

This was your life. If someone had told you that you'd end up dating a Mafia Executive who controlled Gravity and was also the vessel for a god... you'd have laughed. That was simply absurd, but here you were, in bed with that exact guy.

You meeting him had been so long ago. It felt like ages.

And as the time went by, your love for Chuuya deepened, and the two of you faced life's challenges hand in hand. You knew that life with a Mafia Executive was far from ordinary, but you wouldn't have it any other way.

Despite the odds, you had found your place by Chuuya's side, and he had found his home in your arms.

---------------------- Tag list!; (Im finally one of the cool kidz and have one of these too!) @pillow-princess-diaries <3

#bungou stray dogs chuuya #bsd x reader #bsd chuuya #chuuya nakahara x reader #chuuya x reader #oh just why cant he be real and my bf #look who now got a taglist! thats right #your girl jay got one

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oddarin · 4 years ago

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It is one of the most meaningless thing I’ve done in time - all least-to-most ranks and just characters’ fact answers (those that with no pictures) from oficial Ask Arcana gathered in one place. Have no idea what that information could be used for and if it even useful but it kept me occupied and distracted from some life shit for a while, so let it be.

who is most to least likely to enjoy the movie Frozen? Lucio, Portia, Julian, Asra, Muriel, Nadia

Out of the cast, who is the most to least likely to be the jealous type? Portia, Lucio, Muriel & Nadia (tied), Julian, Asra

would you like to rank the characters from who cries most to least ugly? like from sniveling to shoujo manga tears? Muriel, Lucio, Julian, Portia, Asra, Nadia

who is the most to least superstitious Portia, Julian, Nadia, Lucio, Asra, Muriel

most to least excited to be at a WWE event Portia, Lucio, Asra, Julian, Nadia, Muriel

From worst to best at handling children Nadia, Lucio, Muriel, Asra, Portia, Julian

From worst to best for alcohol tolerance Muriel, Asra, Lucio, Julian, Portia, Nadia

Character ranking from best at keeping secrets to loose-liped gossip? Asra, Muriel, Nadia, Lucio, Portia, Julian

best to worst dancers? Asra, Portia, Julian, Nadia, Lucio, Muriel

Most to Least likely to slap you for stealing a mcnugget Nadia, Lucio, Asra, Portia, Julian, Muriel

Least to most likely to eat something weird (read: probably shouldn't be eaten) because of a dare? Nadia, Julian, Muriel, Lucio, Portia, Asra and not even on a dare

how old are each of the revealed characters? everyone is old, but in order of least old to most old: Asra, Portia, Muriel, Julian, Lucio, Nadia

Who's the best kisser? Who's the worst? Best kisser: Faust (good snake smooches) Worst kissers: Mercedes and Melchior (too much cronch)

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If the main 6 played MTG what color decks would they play? Asra: Blue Nadia: White Julian: Black (Portia made his for him) Portia: White/Green Muriel: Green Lucio: Red

How did cast look as babies? Nadia: The best baby, perfect in form and function Asra: A cute baby, always looking around Julian: Not the most handsome baby, a little gangly Portia: Round, squealing delightful baby Lucio: Red-faced screaming awful baby Muriel: Sturdy and well insulated for the long winter

Of the main six characters, which ones are capable of juggling and which ones would absolutely love doing needlepoint? capable of juggling: Portia, Asra, Muriel absolutely love doing needlepoint: Nadia, Julian incapable of juggling/ absolutely hate doing needlepoint: Lucio

what would the cast choose as their job in the mmo final Fantasy XIV? Julian: Dragoon Asra: Astrologian Lucio: Ninja, but he messes up the mudras Nadia: Machinist Portia: Summoner Muriel: Paladin

What would be the favorite attractions/rides of the cast at Disney? Julian: Pirates of the Caribbean Asra: Astro Orbiter Lucio: Tower of Terror (RIP) Muriel: Matterhorn Portia: California Screamin' Nadia: Carousel of Progress

What do the rest of the cast smell like? Nadia: Les Larmes Sacree Du Thebes by Baccarat Asra: Lord of Misrule Lush Shower Cream Julian: Leather seats in a rental car Portia: Cocoa butter and laundry soap Lucio: Fireball, Axe body spray & ass Muriel: myrrh

What board game would The Arcana gang be? Nadia: Clue Asra: Twister Julian: Sorry! Portia: Mouse Trap Lucio: Monopoly Muriel: Guess Who

Who do all the cast main in over watch? Nadia: Ana Asra: Sombra Julian: Reaper Portia: Zarya Muriel: Bastion Lucio: Genji

If everyone participated in a Winter Olympic sport, which one would they be in? Nadia: figure skate (singles) Asra: snowboarding Julian: alpine ski Portia: freestyle ski Muriel: luge Lucio: ice hockey

Main casts Starbucks orders? Julian: Black coffee and he flirts with the barista until it’s ready. Nadia: London Fog Latte. She comes in at exactly 8 every morning. Asra: Matcha latte unless there’s a new radioactive-looking Frappuccino flavor and then he gets that. Muriel: Waiting outside in the car, asks Asra to get him a water. Asra comes back with a hot chocolate and a cake pop. Muriel grumbles but accepts them every time. Lucio: Salted Caramel Mocha extra whip extra sprinkles nonfat no foam soy upside down actually coconut milk instead and then he yells at you if you get it wrong. Portia: Pink Drink and all the baristas get excited when she walks in because they love her and she always tips.

The cast as Kanye songs Nadia: Power Lucio: No Church in the Wild Asra: Love Lockdown Julian: Heartless Portia: Paranoid Muriel: Coldest Winter

Which characters would be in the fire, water, earth, and air nations? Slightly different from what you asked, but: Asra - waterbender Nadia - airbender Julian & Portia - non-benders Muriel - Earthbender Lucio - Firebender

What kind of parents are the cast at their child’s soccer game? Nadia: standing on the sidelines in sunglasses and heels biting her thumbnail and watching every move on the field because she doesnt trust the ref Asra: cheers whenever anything happens, takes as many kids as can fit in the car out for ice cream but doesn’t check with the parents Julian: chats up the other parents relentlessly and isn’t watching when his kid gets hit in the face with the ball Portia: “cmon cmon cmon cmon cmon cmon cmon AW WHAT WAS THAT” Muriel: watching from the parking lot inside the car Lucio: yelling on the phone the whole time, spills all 24 oz of his salted caramel mocha on the bench and doesn’t do anything about it

Which Disney movie is the favorite of each of the cast? Nadia: Fantasia 2000 Asra: The Emperor’s New Groove Julian: Muppet Treasure Island Portia: Muppet Treasure Island Muriel: The Fox and the Hound Lucio: Cinderella 2: Dreams Come True

what kind of youtube channel would each character have (letsplay, cooking, craft, etc)? Asra: very unstructured mostly-cooking channel that also features videos of him just eating weird things, and videos of Faust existing and being cute Nadia: beauty guru with very polished high-end editing Julian: doesn’t know how to use youtube but Portia made an account for him and uploads her shaky/blurry phone videos of his jazz performances Portia: likes and comments on all of Nadia’s videos while occasionally posting cute cat vids Muriel: does not have an internet connection Lucio: extremely loud letsplayer, mostly FPS

What would the cast be as animal crossing villagers? Muriel: Cranky Bear Julian: Smug Eagle Portia: Uchi Cat Nadia: Snooty Ostrich Asra: Lazy Wolf Lucio: Jock Goat

What Fire Emblem Fates' classes would each character be? Asra - Diviner Nadia - Priestess Julian - Adventurer Portia - Maid Muriel - Wolfskin Lucio - Berserker

if the arcana cast were naruto characters, which ones would they be Portia: Naruto Muriel: Gaara Lucio: Orochimaru Julian: Itachi Asra: Kakashi Nadia: Fancy Shikamaru

If the characters of arcana watched rupaul's drag race who would be their faves? Nadia: bebe, raja, peppermint Asra: yara, aja, adore Julian: nina bo’nina, sasha, raven Portia: chichi, bob, ginger Lucio: willam, kimora, mimi imfurst Muriel: Latrice Royale

WHAT ARE THE CHARAS PREFERRED FLAVOR OF ICE CREAM? Nadia: Lavender Lemon Asra: Rainbow Sorbet Julian: Pistachio Portia: Cookie Dough Muriel: Rocky Road Lucio: Red Velvet

Please please arcana cast as mcr songs Lucio: It’s Not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Deathwish Julian: Thank You For The Venom Asra: Welcome To The Black Parade Muriel: House of Wolves Nadia: You Know What They Do To Guys Like Us In Prison Portia: Give Em Hell Kid

What are the characters going to be for Halloween? Asra - glow-in-the-dark mermaid Nadia - [elegant ballgown interpretation of] a swan Julian - tortured vampire/werewolf hybrid Muriel - sheet ghost Portia - ninja turtle Lucio - slutty angel Faust - a very long hot dog

If you had to assign the characters from the Arcana to characters from Labyrinth who would they be? Nadia: Jareth Asra: Sara Julian: Sir Didymus Portia: Hoggle Muriel: Ludo Lucio: The Chilly Down birds

What's each character's favourite fruits? Nadia: Concord Grape Asra: Blue Raspberry Julian: Fig Portia: Banana Muriel: Lemon Lucio: Pomegranate

what's everyone's favorite season? Asra - spring Nadia - summer Julian - autumn Muriel - winter Portia - spring Lucio - summer

Who would the Arcana cast be in a cliche Noir Film? Nadia: boss with kinetic ball bearing desk ornament and brandy in the drawer Asra: first love turned old flame that you run into halfway around the world Julian: haggard scientist with an unbuttoned shirt scribbling on the walls Portia: wisecracking secretary who takes a bus a train and a ferry to work Muriel: ominous farmer that lets people use the phone after a car breaks down Lucio: raging starlet shattering a vase after being blacklisted by every studio

The Arcana cast as Michael Jackson songs? Nadia: Man in the Mirror Asra: You Are Not Alone Julian: Smooth Criminal Portia: Will You Be There Muriel: Ben Lucio: Bad

What would each character be in cats? This probably wasn’t supposed to be Cats the musical but if you think i’m gonna pass this up Nadia: None they’re all awful/ Munkustrap Asra: Mister Mistoffelees Julian: Macavity Portia: Jennyanydots Lucio: Rum Tum Tugger Muriel: Grizabella

what would their favorite emojis be? Asra: 🌚 Nadia: 🍷 Julian: 🎷 Portia: 👀 Muriel: 👁 Lucio: 💃💸😏👑

What panic at the disco songs describe each character best? Julian: Death of a Bachelor Asra: I Write Sins Not Tragedies Portia: She’s a Handsome Woman Nadia: Northern Downpour Lucio: Victorious Muriel: From a Mountain in the Middle of the Cabins

What stereotypes for a super cliché highschool do the characters fall into? Nadia: Valedictorian who has been doing independent study and hasn’t set foot in the building for the past two years Asra: Shows up late every class with loud ass Sunchips, does homework in glow in the dark gel pen Julian: Eats lunch with his teacher so they can keep talking about mitochondria Portia: Gets really hype about dances, always ends up fighting at dances Muriel: Puts away all the folding chairs that everyone left behind Lucio: Gets on the intercom to talk shit about the teacher who gave him a D+ on his plagiarized essay

What sports would the characters play? And would they be any good at those sports? Muriel: Any solitary sport. He likes track and shotput. Nadia: Swimming. She isn’t on a team, she just likes the water. Portia: Wrestling. She’s got a few championship belts. Julian: Grandma Devorak forced him to take One Sport in high school, and he chose long-distance running. Asra: Beach volleyball and snowboarding. He’s just there to have a good time. Lucio: Ice hockey, but he spends it mostly punching other players.

what dragons from books/movies/games match each character best, would you say? As for dragons, one of our writers plays Flight Rising obsessively so here’s every character as a Flight Rising breed. Asra: Fae Nadia: Imperial Lucio: Wildclaw Muriel: Guardian Julian: Skydancer Portia: Snapper

What is each character most likely to do with the mc when they're feeling 'unusually affectionate'? Nadia: feed them champagne grapes and engage them in conversation so she can watch them try to talk with their mouth full Asra: stare at them and stop acknowledging anyone or anything else Julian: preen and spoil them to the point of being a public embarrassment Portia: constant cuddly contact Muriel: follow them at a respectable distance Lucio: belt out an aria at the sight of them

What's everyone favorite manga if they read any in this world? Nadia: Rose of Versailles Asra: Yugioh Julian: Blackjack Portia: Ranma ½ Muriel: Hunter x Hunter Lucio: Berserk

how much does faust like all the characters? like, who does she like the most/least? does she like the main character at all? Faust adores the main character almost as much as she loves Asra. But if she had to choose from the rest: Most good smelling: Nadia Most fun to squeeze: Julian Most too big to eat: Muriel Most hard to hide from: Portia Most attackable: Lucio

what kind of drunk is everybody? Nadia: capable, professional drunk on the move. Never in the same room twice Asra: touchy-feely but won’t leave the couch, still somehow manages to catch on fire Julian: morphs into The Storyteller, everyone in earshot ends up caught in a dramatic reenactment of his life story waiting for him to take a breath but he never does Portia: makes 6 new friends in the bathroom line Muriel: moody, talks to no one, keeps taking everybody’s empty bottles out to the trash Lucio: the loudest, the drama, the legend, the first to dip out when the cops show up

Of the Characters: Who tells a dirty joke? Who doesn't understand it? Who is disgusted? Who laughs? Who hides a smile? Who gets annoyed? Lucio: tells a dirty joke Muriel: doesn’t understand it Julian: is disgusted Asra: laughs Portia: hides a smile Nadia: gets annoyed

What are the characters usual reactions when subbing their toes? Nadia: It Does Not Happen Asra: hops it off Julian: hissing, closes his eyes while he savors the pain Portia: (string of curses) “ok………. i’m fine” Muriel: doesn’t notice because his toes are too far away Lucio: shrieks, revenge kicks the wall, shrieks harder

what you think everyones deadly sin would be? the deadly cliches: Nadia - Pride Asra - Lust Julian - Wrath Portia - Envy Muriel - Sloth Lucio - Gluttony

On a scale of good to bad, who sings karaoke? Nadia has a silky voice with impeccable vibrato. But she only sings karaoke alone in the bath. Asra has an airy, intimate voice. He’s the worst at karaoke because he doesn’t even get up off the couch. Julian has very limited singing ability, but he will talk sing the whole way through if he has to. He’s great at duets, somehow. Portia has a throaty, powerful voice. She brings the house down with Heart and Bonnie Tyler ballads, even if she squeaks on the high notes. Muriel has a gravelly grumble that he is convinced is useless for singing and if you hand him the microphone he’ll drop it and go stand in the corner. Lucio has an overdone musical theater voice but he is tone deaf. He will shout out the high notes and power through the rest and if you try to skip his song there will be hell to pay

which social media platform which each character Prefer™ ? Asra - twitter (RTs a lot of memes and shitposts, posts incomprehensible dril-like tweets at 3am) Nadia - instagram (flawless makeup and aesthetic™) Julian - yahoo answers Portia - snapchat Muriel - what is social media Lucio - LinkedIn (you will NEVER stop getting email notifications from him)

what dnd classes would the cast be (like mage, assassin, cleric etc)? Nadia: Paladin Asra: Warlock Julian: Rogue Portia: Bard Muriel: Fighter Lucio: Barbarian

what would each characters spice girl name be Asra: Mystery Spice Nadia: Boss Spice Julian: Suffering Spice Portia: Sassy Spice Muriel: Surly Spice Lucio: Spicy Spice

how complicated is each character's personal hygiene routine? Nadia’s personal hygiene routine: an exact science and takes a practiced team of servants to execute. Julian’s personal hygiene routine: splashing his face 5-7 times and gargling with his famous mint vodka peroxide formula Asra’s personal hygiene routine: sticking his head underwater until he’s awake Portia’s personal hygiene routine: putting her hair in a bun and scrubbing herself with a cloth and bucket down by the frog pond Lucio’s personal hygiene routine: milk and caviar bath every 13 hours Muriel’s personal hygiene routine: standing in the pouring rain

What's everyone's favorite alcoholic drinks? Asra - St Germain, tequila, blue curaçao, lime juice, hibiscus syrup (serve in a champagne flute or martini glass, garnished with a wildflower or tiny umbrella) Julian - whiskey, Kahlua, Grand Marnier, lemon juice (serve in a highball glass) Nadia - Chambord, white wine, seltzer (serve in a wine glass, chilled or on the rocks) Portia - beer & apple cider with a shot of rum (serve in a lowball glass) Muriel - Baileys, butterscotch schnapps, hot chocolate (serve warm, in your coziest mug) Lucio - Jägermeister & Goldschläger topped with overproof rum (serve as a flaming shot)

what would be each of the characters' favorite genre of music? Asra: Bossa Nova and EDM Nadia: Obscure Opera and Calming beach sounds Julian: 20 minute tracks of Quality Jazz Portia: Reggae and dad rock Muriel: New wave and white noise Lucio: Top 40 and Dark Funky Disco

who would the arcana characters be from mean girls?? Asra: the guy who asked what day it was Nadia: cady Julian: gretchen weiners Portia: janis Lucio: regina george Muriel: damian

Which Hogwarts house would each of the Main Cast belong in? Asra & Julian - Ravenclaw Nadia - Slytherin Portia & Muriel - Hufflepuff Lucio - Gryffindor

What would the characters modern!au job/career of choice be? Lucio owns and manages several nightclubs and has a trashy daytime talk show Asra does really low-budget magic shows at kids’ birthday parties by day, and DJs at one of Lucio’s clubs at night Nadia is the city mayor, an international chess champion, and concert pianist Portia works at Home Depot (used to be a waitress at Red Lobster but the tips were terrible), but she wants to be a zookeeper Julian is a doctor at an underfunded hospital with lots of drama Muriel lives off the grid in a broken-down van in the woods

Just due to mild curiosity what would be the casts favorite musicals? Asra - Legally Blonde: The Musical Nadia - Chicago Julian - Les Mis Muriel - Wicked Portia - Cats! Lucio - Phantom of the Opera / Kinky Boots (it’s a tie)

what cryptid is every character Asra = Chupacabra Julian = Mothman Nadia = Nessie Portia = Loveland Frog Muriel = Bigfoot Lucio = Jersey Devil

how would the game's characters celebrate the MC's birthday with them?? Asra would take them on a long journey without telling them where they were going (but would keep them entertained with riddles) to a scenic oasis, where he would pretend to drown so MC has to dive into the water and at the bottom is a magic flute that can summon a swarm of bees (their favorite!) Nadia would throw a tastefully brief festival in their honor. MC would be lavished with pampering (by professional pamperers) from dawn to dusk and when the clock struck midnight, they would be presented with seven bejeweled eagles (one for every day of the week) Julian would meet them for dinner in a shady tavern, bring them heaping plates of food and offer unsolicited advice for the coming year. About halfway through the meal he would have to scramble out the back door because law enforcement arrived on the scene but he’d put it an order in the kitchen to bring them something for dessert Lucio would declare the day a holiday and call it Day of the Beloved One of Lucio. They would have to sit uncomfortably still while a master artiste painted their portrait and a mile-long line of peasants laid gifts at their feet. Muriel doesn’t celebrate birthdays because time is a human construct Portia would throw a big loud party with a barbecue :D

Since it is soon, what would the characters do for Valentines day with us (the MC)? Nadia would take you on an elegant river cruise stocked with 130 varieties of tiny cake and a private crooner hired to serenade you but she would end up throwing them overboard for not hitting the high notes Asra would take you to the mall and splurge on all the stuff you both can’t afford but wait way too long to get lunch so you get into a fight and he proposes in the food court Julian would show up on the 15th after with all the candy he scored at 75% off, pretend it was on purpose that he got the day wrong, and wake you up at 3 am to come clean because the guilt was eating him alive Muriel would light some scented candles, cook up a sensual meal and throw a bearskin rug in front of the fireplace for you to enjoy alone while he escapes into the woods Portia would pack a picnic of chicken and tortilla chips, take you to the beach where you could splash around until the sun goes down and lull you to sleep on the sandy blanket with her acoustic guitar Lucio would have servants fill your room with floor to ceiling flowers while you sleep and wait impatiently for you to wake up like

Would you roommate with any of the characters? it’s hard to decide, so here are some pros and cons Asra - pro: never home / con: leaves dishes in the sink for weeks Nadia - pro: your home will be spotless / con: it’s spotless because she orders you to clean it for her Julian - pro: medical professional / con: half of your apartment is now this

rate the characters on how #extra they are Muriel: 4/10 Lucio: 13/10 Everyone else: 10/10

Which character could be best described as "tender"?? "Spicy"??? “tender”: Muriel “tender”/“Spicy”: Asra, Portia “Spicy”/”tender”: Julian, Nadia “Spicy”: Lucio

what the favorite Pokemon of all the characters were. Asra - Ekans, Delphox, Espeon Nadia - Noctowl, Gardevoir, Musharna Julian - Absol, Bisharp, Murkrow Portia - Chansey, Politoed, Hoothoot Muriel - Pangoro, Aggron, Wigglytuff Lucio - Houndoom, Pyroar, Skarmory

#what I spend my life on #the arcana #the arcana game #asra alnazar #nadia satrinava #julian devorak #muriel #portia devorak #count lucio #asra the magician #the arcana muriel #ask arcana #I just like to organize information too much

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recordmcqueen · 3 years ago

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I’m provoking you to make barbie movie rant. Poke poke *poke you with a stick*

I love you

One of the first barbie movies i watched as a child was nutcracker and it was so terrifying it traumatized me and i cannot rewatch it to this day

Island princess also somewhat confused and disturbed me as a child like "why cant she understand people what" and the whole POISONING ANIMALS thing but i got over it its not terrible lol

When i was 7 i went to a family event sort of thing and they had prizes for the kids and i got to choose between a doll+dvd set of swan lake or princess and the pauper. Iirc i chose swan lake but later swapped because p+p had Two girls on the cover but i eventually went home with swan lake because her dress was pretty. I ended up hating the movie and my friend beheaded the doll (with my encouragement) when i was 12

I hated nori and nalu from mermaida alike growing up because nori was a bitch and at least nalu had that silly carousel of confusion moment but its only very recently that i discovered that norinis actually. Very pretty. Ahem-

BARBIE IN THE 12 DANCING PRINCESSES WHAT CAN I SAY the evil stepmother was terrifying and this movie taught me the word "attire" (gosh for kids movies they sure use a lot of words no one knows) and shine is an absolute Banger and i just love this movie a lot i remember desperately wishing my room had a magical floor opening up to an alternate dimension and imagining what I would use those wishing flowers for

Barbie mariposa was also slightly traumatic cause of the poisoning plot but i really loved the movie otherwise i related to the mc cause bOOKWORM and she was also so pretty aaa i think i had a book from the movie at one point too

DIAMOND CASTLE I GOT THE LIANA DOLL FOR EID AND SHE ONLY SANG ONE NOTE BUT I LOVED HER EVEN THO MY FAVE WAS ALEXA i actually hated the girl in the mirror i cant remember her name now but i found her annoying and out of tune but otherwise man this movie was probably my semi sapphic awakening like WHO WOULDN'T WANNA LIVE IN A COTTAGE WITH THEIR BEST FRIEND LIVING OFF JAM AND BREAD AND BREAD AND JAM FOREVER man ok but the brainwashed betrayal scene was also kind of traumatic at least the ending was happy and so aesthetic omg i need to rematch it tho its been a hot minute

I actually loved christmas carol when i watched it even tho making barbie the antihero was very unexpected it Worked and it was just a great movie tbh we dont talk abt it enough imo

Hmmm thumbelina was kind of a miss for many reasons but when i was about 5 my mom got me a very pretty backpack of it except that also around this time i got a thumbelina book from school except it was based on the 1994 non barbie version so i would always be so confused comparing ginger thumbelina in my book to dazzling barbie thumbelina on my backpack but yk it be like dat sometimes when ur 5 years old

THREE MUSKETEERS IS THE MOST HYPED I EVER WAS TO WATCH A MOVIE i lived in a small town in the middle of nowhere when it came out and had no means of watching it but i aTE the promo materials i got the step into reading books i daydreamed about it cONSTANTLY till one day we finally went to a family friends house who had the dvd and (they warned my sis there might be some scary scenes with the villain) my mom actually caught my reaction on camera im sure ive posted this here before but its so iconic pls

I need to add that these were both part of group photos and i was the only one Not looking at the camera pls

Mermaid tale 1 and 2 were both kinda meh for me i def enjoyed the first one more but it doesnt stand out in my memory as something id really want to rewatch so yk theyre there i watched em :p

I had the fashion fairytale book for ages before i got around to watching the movie and it was? Ok? I guess? I didn't love the modern day premise or the whole subplot with ken and the animation style was pretty jarring so overall kind of a mid movie and book for me :p

A FAIRY SECRET HAD THE BEST BARBIE/RAQUELLE RECONCILIATION ARC LIKE I DONT REMEMBER JACK ABT THE REST OF THE MOVIE EXCEPT THE MEMORY WIPE WHICH PISSED ME OFF BUT THE BARBIE AND RAQUELLE BONDING kept this one higher than fashion fairytale im still obsessed with them upgrading thru the power of friendship and man i really gotta rewatch this one also i did have a stickerbook of it but barbie looked ugly as sht on the cover which made me sad </3

Princess charm school wasnt one i expected to enjoy so much i think the appeal of the custom uniforms got to me and i just had to watch and ykw it was a fun movie with an enjoyable plot twist and nice antagonist redemption arc i love delancy so much man i actually got a doll of her from my friend one birthday and then swapped her back a few days later for 6 smarties snack packs (we all have our regrets amirite :"3) but i would brush her hair every night before bed and mm yeah i like this movie a lot lol it has its cringy bits but i always rewatch and look back on it fondly

I. Watched princess and the popstar. Before princess and the pauper. Im a terrible barbie heathen i know but i did sort of enjoy it quite a bit and i liked To Be a Princess cause id never heard the superiority of the original and yeahhh i wouldnt rewatch it but its a Thing :"3

SPEAKING OF PRINCESS AND THE PAUPER THIS MOVIE IS SO GOOD AND FOR WHAT like ok anneliese is kind of in a privileged situation and to compare that to poverty is eH BUT PREMINGER AND THE PLOTS AND THE SONGS AND EVERYTHING IS JUST SO PEAK I WISH I GREW UP WITH THIS BUT AT LEAST IVE SEEN IT THREE TIMES NOW and plan to watch again in the future

I dont think ive ever liked the pets in barbie movies and i know bibble from fairytopia is a basebreaking character some ppl adore him some people want him dead im kinda just there lol 😭

#allya squawks #allya answers #barbae #this was kind of all over the place but eh #i miss delancy ueueue #THANK U FOR ASKING API MWAH #this was my childhoodddd #esp 12dp kickstarted my massive imagination world i think

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glameowr · 3 years ago

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I'll bite. What's the deal with Clint from Stardew? I wanna hear this rant

oh god okay this is gonna be long im sososo sorry. also most of it is points i got from the youtuber leapalot that i agree with

most of why i dont like clint comes down 2 his weird obsession with emily …

- clint stays at the saloon until 12:00 on most days. i dont think its bc hes an alcoholic like pam but i think its bc hes watching emily the whole time (emily works at the saloon until 12:30)

- at the festival of ice hes making a snowman and says “emily started helping me without any provocation … does that mean something? *gulp*” then emily says something like “wow this snowman needs a serious makeover … who made this?” which is just really funny 2 me

- during clints 3 heart event he says: “im a nice guy if you get 2 know me i swear!” ok classic incel line … after you give him advice on how 2 treat women he tries and fails 2 ask out emily and says “sigh im doomed” … youre DOOMED bc you cant ask out emily ??? this might be a reach but i dont think he should put his whole future happiness in the hands of 1 person

- clints 6 heart event: HES WATCHING EMILY FROM THE BUSHES. COOL WOW. hes waiting 4 emily 2 stop talking 2 caroline, but you convince him 2 go ask her out by threatening 2 stop upgrading your tools, so he does ask her out (but she obviously still thinks of him as a friend)

- emilys 8 heart event: so during this event emily is doing a clothing therapy thing at the mayors house (id loveee 2 rant abt mayor lewis also) when clint comes out in his outfit he chose she says “awww cute” and he doesnt like that (ig he wanted 2 be called sexy or something idk) so then emily expresses her romantic interest in you, then clint comes back in the house like “ahhh im 2 embarrassed 2 wear this outfit”. then, he sees you and emily and says “congrats *player name*” so he doesnt congratulate emily … ??? he really doesnt think of her as a friend in the slightest if he isnt happy 4 her or cares about her happiness if it doesnt have 2 do with him. its like he thinks of her as a prize 2 be won or something …

- at 8+ hearts with emily, she can say “i think clints mad at me, he doesnt look at me anymore … i always thought we were friends” so he just ignores her when he realizes she will never like him romantically ??? jesus christ dude

heres some stuff that doesnt have 2 do with emily:

- hes just generally gloomy and not fun 2 talk 2. like im sorry your family made you eb a blacksmith but its not really fun hearing you constantly complain abt how boring your life is

- at ginger island he can say “oh no … i forgot 2 clip my toenails” wow gross thanks clint

- at the dance of the moonlight jellies he says something like “i wore my special shoes tonight and no body noticed” nobody cares about your special shoes clint we’re all here 2 see the beautiful natural event that happens once a year sorry and also you dont talk 2 any body and have no friends besides emily and the farmer so who would notice anyway

- um ok so something that is kinda creepy is if you buy the telephone and call clint 2 ask when hes open something he can say is “hello? oh … *player name* … your voice sounds really nice over the phone …” then after telling you when he closes he SLAMS down the phone, probably embarrassed over what he said

- (THIS NEXT THING ONLY HAPPENS IF YOURE A GIRL FARMER BTW) so if you invite him 2 the movie theatre, in the lobby he said “oh .. a … are we on a date then?” NO ??? then during the movie he drinks from his flask so he gets drunk and he says “*whispers* … if youre um … tired … you can put your head on my … my shoulder. heh … or not!” NO THANKS IM GOOD. then after the movie he says “hey … that was kind of fun … right?” no not really. and if youre a male farmer he just complains the whole time and says the movie was alright.

tldr: clint is a gloomy, creepy incel with no friends who acts like emily is some prize that is the key 2 his happiness and completely ignores her and plays the victim card when she doesnt like him romantically. i can understand if he has social anxiety, especially since his family pushed him 2 be a blacksmith but i dont think its an excuse 4 how he treats women.

#stardew valley #im so sorry i know no body cares abt this but thank you 4 letting me rant abt him i rlly dont like this guy #ask

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peg-legz4 · 4 years ago

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peggy's klance fic rec :)

this is my first fic rec and i know its really sloppy but one of my friends said she wanted it do I an forced to post it after procrastinating finishing it for a month. enjoy!

Best Friends to Lovers

Hearts Don't Break Around Here - klancekorner

AHHHHH okay okay okay this is the first klance fic i ever read and it set the bar soooo high. basically keith and lance have been bestfriends since foreverrr and it jumps between flashbacks and present day where keith is realizing hes just been In love with lance for like the whole time they've known each other and lance calls him snickers and its s l o w b u r n bc they're both oblivious idiots but theyre also pining and aghhghhh AND THE WAY THEY START TO REALIZE THEIR OWN FEEELINGS IS! IM- it's super cute pls read!!!

with love - allinadayswork - 8,888 AHHHGGGGGGGs high school au! this is so cute they're both so smitten basically they're best friends but lance is also keiths secret admirer and ahhhhh!!!!!! so cute pls read i beg of you + valentines day and overprotective shiro!!!!

Your Smile Makes Me Awkward - Lancelee (ashleeforreal) - 8,791

another best friends to lovers (hehe) lance gets his braces taken off and keith is in a gay panic because lance looks hot and he doesnt know what to do and theres miscommunication but its all good in the end this was so cute

One Heart Missing - starlightment - 24021 HSWOQSJKNQJNIU BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS AU IM A SUCKER FOR THESEEE they’re in college and keith finds out he loves lance nd then they have a fwb thing going on and ppor keith but also poor lance for reasons i can’t disclose anD THE REOCCURRING THEME WITH THE ICE SKATING ITS SO CUTE AND DEHQIJOjqsk please just read it oh my god

Soulmate AU

between two points - Alltheroads - 20,589 red string of fate au!!!!!!! keith is one of the few people in the world who can actually see the strings though, and lance seems not to have a string, just like keith. its them falling for eachother and keith teaching him how to repair a motorcycle and 50′s themed diners its amazingggg

Tell Me It’s My Name Written In Your Skin - Ivnars - 15,636 soulmate au where the name of your soulmate appears on your wrist once you fall in love with them (i think?) and lance thinks his is unrequited and of course he also has a martyr complex and is willing to die for the team and almost does and then omgomg i just its so great pls read

Bend It Like Soulmates - Reader115 - 23,998 HHHHHHHHhh SOCCER SOULMAtE AU AND THEYRE SO GOOD TOGETHER AND OMGOMGOMG SO MUCH PINING AND TENSION AND IT SJUST SO HAPPY AND AMAZING IT HAS THEM BEING THE FAMOUS SOCCER SOULMATE COUPLE PLEASE READ READ READ YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SOCCER

there, nestled against his pulse - hiuthyn SHAOAMALAL ITS A SOULMATE AU I LOVE THESE HJDJSJSJSS AND ITS CANONVERSE (im pretty sure this was a one shot first and then I came back and it was a multi chapter fic and I read and it was like 1000× more amazing ajsjska) this was one of the very first klance fics i read and it’s definitely the first one that made me like gasp and scram cause oh my god,. okay basically the first and last words your soulmate says show up on your wrists and keith hides his wrists because he thinks he k words his soulmate and there’s miscommunication aND KEITH’S BACKSTORY AND IT GIVES LANCE SO MUCH DEPTH??????? and it has a really happy ending and its slowburn and angsty and pining and i’m a sucker for all those things which made this amazing!!!!!!!

College AU

i just wanna be (with you) - aknightley - 8,020 COLLEGE ROOMMATES AU LETS GOOOOOOOO there’s a lot of tension and pining and they give eachother gifts all the time i’m sOFT pls pls pls read

reasons why keith is the worst - MellodramaticLawliet - 5517 lance and keith are roommates and to cope with his hate for keith, he starts a list of why he hates keith and it just turns into a journal abt keith and lance is so oblivious and there’s also fencing tournaments which is cool hadjalkj read ittt

You Should Date Me - petalloso ahhhh lance and Keith are both freshman in college and they have little adventures and it's just super cute and fluffy ajskkasna

Canonverse

The Art of Secret Telling - jilliancares - 4,880 so to form another coalition, voltron has to form another coalition and lance has, 1, never kissed anybody and 2, has a crush on keith hehehe

a culmination of things - viscrael ahhh it's super cute and short and basically jumps around in time and they're just in looovee

instincts - godsensei lance n keith are getting their groove on when red mistakes Keith's pleasure for distress and comes crashing through the wall ajsksksmsna

i can’t help but want - aknightley lance and Keith's lions get stranded on different islands but their comms get through so they're just talking and bonding and falling in love while they get their lions fixed akssjal so cute pls read!!!!

never saw you coming - dimpleforyourthoughts HOLY HELL OG MY FREAKINGNS JUEUSS I LOVE THIS FIC SO MUCH IVE READ IT LIKE 20 TIMES AND EACH TIME IM BLOWN AWAY BY HOW BEAUTIFULL ITS WRITTEND AKAK its canonverse and goes in depth with my boys and lance has a martyr complex and keitHS BACKSTORY AND LE PETIT PRINCE AND THEY WOULD DIE FOR EACHOTHER AND ALMOST DO AND IT MADE ME CRY AND GINGER THE TABBY CAT PLEASE READ OH MY GOD ITS SLOWBURN AND THEYRE BOTH S O SMITTEN AHHHH

Terminal Velocity - speaks tHE ANGSTTTTT. i'm like, a whore for angst. but basically. voltron gets captured by these alien empaths and this guy feeds off of other people's pain(???) and so he tortures lance and makes keith watch and oh my. this is so good I felt so many emotions pls read.

Keith McClain - orphan_account 🥺🥺 keith sees visions of him and lance in the future on the space whale and its v soft

In English, Please - orphan_account this is a fic I'll always remember omg so lance flirts with Keith in spanish but pretends they're insults and he thinks Keith wont find out (he does)

how not to be a cat: 101 - jilliancares- 8,113 kEITH KEEPS accidENTALLY TURNINg INTo A CAT aND THEN ENDS UP CUDDLING WITH LANCE I”M SOFTTT THIS FIC BROKE ME WITH ITS CUTENESS HAHIUSJK

moderation - Katranga - 21, 613 HSJHKJAJOIHQQ keith gets bitten by a love bug and sees lance first and then allura gets bitten and sees hunk so he just tries to act how allura acts so it doesnt give away his actual crush on lance hsjksskjs

Public Displays of Affection by hattricks lance n Keith are undercover on a mission and they see guards and they hide by making out ajkaka

the waiting game - they frick frack a lot but basically Keith and lance make eachother wait through a week without sex and only teasing sksjakak

To Bite, Or Not To Bite - jilliancares - 11,433 lance gets bitten by a vampire!!!! and he turns into one!!!! need i say more? and the way it like happens AND THEN THE WAY HIM AND KEITH DECIDE TO OMG IM THIS IS GRESR

feelings on fire i guess i'm a bad liar - melancholymango - 22679 a witch curses lance and now he can’t lie to Keith or anything having to do with Keith and its really funny i cackled sjhkah

The Loverboy Trials - PM_Writes - 20,838 THSIEIHWHIJIHJI I LOVED THIS ONE AHHHHHHH.basicaly the aliens think keith is their god of fertility and stuff so they’re like oh we need to do a ritual thing where people fight for his virginity and voltron is like oh fuck no so then lance has to compete to save keith i can’t get over it it’s- i’m softttt

Sorry, Who Are You? - sjskakaja lance and keith were childhood best friends but keith is bad with faces so when they meet at the garrison lance is really salty and keiths backstoey and the way he find out i'm- its great trust me pls

it might not be that bad - Katranga - 16,416 omg i adore this fic okay so. basically. keith doesnt know the difference between jealously and attraction because of him clinging to the closet in middle school and now hes trying to find out why his and Lance's definitions of jealousy differ and Keith's bad at feelings please readd

Everything Else

read all about it - starlightment AHAKAKAL HIGH SCHOOL AU!!!! i just read this one and it’s great!!!1 Lance is on the newspaper and writes and articles professing his love for Keith, the star quarterback that everyones in love with. it's such a good read and oh my goshh this made me throw my phone and squeal out of freaking excitement i love it so much 🥺 idk how but this made me feel as if i was living out senior year through this fic??? it was just that amazing

it's you that's haunting me - perfchan

suuuper cute youtuber au where Keith hunts gosts and enlists lance as his cameraman. (includes a haunted mansion ballroom dance scene) and its just great oml oml i love it so so much!!! there’s also like 4 sequels so that makes it even better!!!1

Dirty Laundry -

this is a staple and if you havent read it you're either new to the fandom or living under a rock but its a fake dating au where keith spends winter break with Lance's family and they bondddd and its great!!!!

alright i just realized the author took it down so uhhhh

adaigo by shipstiel

lance moves in next to keith and Keith likes to play piano at the ungodly hours of the might where lance is just trying to sleep. this ones so cute!!!!!!

eyes to you wide with wonder - aknightley

an office au where Keith is shiro's secretary and lance always comes up to his desk to annoy him and they mask their affection under playful banter and lance also ends up being Keith's knight in shining armor ajskssnns it's so great!!!!

okay i know that you are not my type (still i fall) - quidhitch

ajoasbak nyma cuffs lance to a bed during a party and then leaves but then the bed turns out to be none other than....Keith's bed!! so they like talk while Lance is only in boxers and cuffed to Keith's bed

you never stood a chance - kagshina

it's a snapchat fic!!!!!!! lance accidentally snaps keith a shirtless pic and then Keith snaps back and it's just 😳😳 the whole time it's great omg

Cold Hearts Looking for Love - swang_is_trying typical enemies to lovers where lance is the son of a rich businessman and visits the orphanage that Keith hangs around to visit Pidge??? but its fricking jam packed with them thirsting over each other sshsksksm (i must warn you, its incomplete)

Of Don Juan And Elvis - shipstiel

Keith is a starbucks barista and lance always comes in and orders with really weird names ehehe

And Now Presenting: Rielle and the Forbidden Meringue

tsbkakaK this ones so cute keith is a galra guard and hes guarding a garden (ooh alliteration) and climbs a tree and then falls into lance's arms (who's an altean guard) and its really cute sjkssahajaj

how to not keep a diary, or, lance’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad semester - glitterfreezing sjskasla they're sophmores in college and roommates pidge forces lance to keep a diary and he just ends up ranting about keith but he’ oblivious to his won feelings heheh

Lance and the Search For Keith's Boyfriend - haikquu - 9497

lance is jealous bc everyone keeps talking abt keith’s boyfriends but he doesnt know who he is (it’s him)

bus buddies - WhatTheBodyGraspsNot - 8033

lance notices Keith doesnt have a bus buddy on a 3-day-trip to save the bees so he goes and sits with him and it's so cuteeeee

got got got it bad - kairiolette - 10,377 so keith is bad at feelings so he asks what its like to have a crush on someone and then basically tells lance that he has a crush on him and lance just casually brings it up

Only Fools Rush In (but I Can't Help Falling in Love with You) - Fangirl_on_fire_ - 13,524

OMGOMGOMG LANCE IS A MAFIA .BOSS AND IT STARTS OFF WITH A ONE NIGHT STAND AND THEN THEY AHAAKSJSKSM ITS GREAT PLS READ

The Bitter And The Sweetness - The_Real_Karaage - 66337

its a klance youtuber au!!!!!! I love these!!!!! okay so keith makes like conspiracy theory videos and knife throwing ones and lance does like vlogs or storytimes with pidge and they also do dance and then they meet irl but lance doesn't know keith is the YouTube guy cause he hides his identity and omgomggg also Keith is from Texas so he acts like a stereotypical emo cowboy and as a Texan I find it extremely funny

nobody puts baby in a corner - orphan_account - 3,950

its like the 23rd century and aliens are on earth and keith is a royal galra and lance goes clubbing and and they meet and dance and wOOHOO

okay thats all for now but i'm probably gonna make a part 2 cause i have a whole bunch saved to my notes app lmao have fun reading y'all

#klance #klance fics #klance fic rec #voltron fic #keith kogane #lance mcclain #keith kogane x lance mcclain

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