#she could have hesitated and then let him. would’ve conveyed the same meaning. and even given

[thestarlightforge]

I’d never seen this photo before today.

They changed a lot about the material from Twelve, some of which I didn’t take issue with. But this is one thing I wish they would have kept.

With all the delicate interweaving about trust—how important it is to Lucy Gray, how Sejanus trusts Coryo too, how he slowly betrays the both of them—this was an important moment. In the book, it leads into a longer scene of them with the Covey, which they cut, so it’s a different transition—they used it here to simultaneously illustrate A) the threat of the other Peacekeepers to their relationship, and B) the rhetorical power of the woods/lake/nature to alleviate those pressures. But with the book version, after they’ve kissed and sat together for several hours and are heading back, Coryo offers to carry Lucy Gray’s guitar for her. He has a moment of internal monologue where he wonders if she trusts him enough to touch it.

And she does, without skipping a beat.

[maschotch]

please never apologize for geekin’ about these nerds! i adore the geekiness!

you’re absolutely right— paget’s acting choices are so particular and yet pass by in a moment that the pacing of the story would have to be snail-like and measured to account for it. and that works for some stories, but not for most. it’s certainly tough and i don’t envy you for having to make that call.

i do think it’s fascinating to see the impact religion has on emily despite her, clearly, not being devout. no one on the team, save for derek and (maybe, early) jj could be classified as such and yet! emily harbors such an immense level of guilt and burden that i’m genuinely surprised we didn’t get more confessions from her. especially through the boston-doyle story line. nevertheless, i found that to be perfectly evocative 👏🏻 well done 👏🏻

and i agree, i think that hotch is another case of an actor making such particular choices about the emotional expressions of his character and it gives such good texture to the dynamics of the show and team! i just made myself a little sad thinking about how a story that delved into all of those characters’ observations of hotch’s level of care could be told… because those stories they’d tell about how they found out the depth of his care would need an audience… 😖 what if, after haley dies, much after the funeral, she visits them all. she’s worried that hotch won’t be emotionally open with jack and she just wants to make sure his friends know. and so, she comes to them in their dreams and she asks, and so they tell her their stories. and when they see the hotchner boys at the bau the next day for a half day with hotch and jack says ‘i saw mommy last night and she told me to tell you all thank you! everything’s going to be okay’ and runs off back to dad’s office, they all look at each other like— wait. did we all have the same dream? (fade to black)

anyway, clearly you are in kind company. feel free to write essays (after exams (that you’ll absolutely succeed on)) of course 💛

- 🦢

i don’t typically acknowledge actors specifically (celebrity culture is weird enough already and i don’t really wanna partake), and i’m extra hesitant with pg/tg specifically… akjsdhlgk i dont wanna be mean but i’ve seen them in some other stuff and they are… not the best actors (even though i’m still obsessed with love and human remains, and pg does AMAZING as sadie doyle). but when they play these two roles specifically… idk something just clicks. i don’t think the characters would be the same—i don’t think the characters would be half as good—with anyone else. emily just has an incredibly lively energy that also feels meticulous, like a carefully crafted persona. authentic but tailored. meanwhile hotch’s entire personality is conveyed through microexpressions that sometimes i think i just hallucinate. he’s sooo reserved but there’s still so much emotion?? idk how he does it 

i love and respect emily and doyle because she only takes everything sexy about christianity (or whatever fucking religion they talk about): insurmountable guilt, sick aesthetics, and demons. derek can go cry about god if he wants idc i just like the guilt aspect.. constantly needing to prove that there’s worth in her existence. she’s kind of like hotch that way, but emily’s is more about repentance and hotch is more about freddie mercury vibe wishing he’d never been born at all which is soooo sexy of him  

that’s definitely a cool story idea! i also like the idea of haley haunting the other bau members? they feel guilty for taking hotch away, wondering if maybe none of this would’ve happened if they just let him leave like she wanted. 

[angsty-omi]

truth or drink.

kuroo tetsuro x reader

tw: suggestive content, exes, cursing

you heard about this interview game show on youtube through your good friends. watching it your first time with them, it was so blatantly obvious that they were still in love.

you pointed your drumstick at the TV screen, “it’s so obvious that she still likes him, look at her posture!” your voice muffled with a mouth full of ice cream.

“that’s what’s fun about these videos! plus it’s kinda sweet that they rekindle the fire through an intense game of truth or dare” hinata replied.

“truth or drink” you emphasized, “and plus, they’re exes for a reason, nonetheless. just because you try again, doesn’t mean there will always be a different outcome. if there was an issue that both parties couldn’t get over, what makes it okay now in front of a camera? men ain’t shit, and honestly so are the girls who participate in these. no self worth honestly.”

“wow... y/n it’s very obvious you’re projecting your feelings about your breakup with kuroo onto these fun challenges,” kageyama spoke for the first time that night.

and he was right. you were still in the mourning period over your breakup. every romantic song, couple, and certain aphrodisiacs were out to get you because it reminded you of him. to ease the pain, you expressed your hurt through bitchiness to others. not only were you a bitch, but a hypocrite.

how? because two years later you were sitting across the table from kuroo, with a camera to your right and shots to your left. you didn’t even know how you got into this position. one night you were super drunk and missed him. submissions were open and your intention was to see him again. other than that, it was all a blur.

as the director read the rules of the game, your’s and kuroo’s eyes were boring into each other, and you were nervous about how he felt currently being in such a vulnerable position.

“first off, we’ll introduce you guys and your back story,” the director instructed.

[where did you guys meet?]

“we-

“she was-”

you both interrupted each other. you lent out your hand as a gesture that he could say it.

“she was actually watching a game of mine, our school was against hers and her seat just happened to be directly in front of my eyesight. she looked beautiful and i-”

“now i have to stop you there, i was not beautiful. i had a bunch of acne and a crooked tooth”

*you look straight at the camera*

“since when are those features not beautiful?” kuroo mocked, making him seem like the best guy in front of the cameras.

you only rolled your eyes and let him go on.

“on our last set, it was a close game. the score was 25-24 nekoma and i needed one more hit. when kenma set it to me, i hit it. the winning spike. that’s when i looked at her, pointed, and blew a kiss. and the rest was history”

you smiled at that memory. it was actually a really sweet moment. you’ve never really felt seen or unique, but he made you feel like the most important person in the world, and you’ll always cherish that.

[when did you guys break up?]

“around 2-3 years ago, it was a while ago” you responded.

*you both immediately grabbed the shots next to each other and clanked the glass together, before downing it*

you chuckled, because of how you both knew this was going to be hard.

*you picked up the top card*

“pffffftttttt rate me in bed, and how i can improve?”

“i would honestly say you’re a good 9? it was very passionate and soft except for the times it wasn’t”

*kuroo winked at the camera, while you punched his shoulder*

“i just wish you let me hit it in the back more”

*you hid your face in complete embarrassment with the card*

“next.”

*kuroo swiped the next card*

the smile on his face immediately turned into stone when he read the card.

“are you attracted to any of my friends?” he said with a pinch of pettiness.

“HAHAhahahaha...” you slowly grab the tequila bottle next to you.

his face conveyed mild irritation with a “🙂” face on him.

“weren’t you attracted to kyoko?” you dramatically raised an eyebrow.

then he grabbed the bottle from your hand. you didn’t feel jealous at all, in fact, you too were attracted to kyoko.

“please censor the name during the final editing” you smiled at the director, and you swore they just blushed.

*you grabbed the next card*

“what’s the most annoying thing about me?”

“you would always just kiss me to avoid conflict. like, when you washed your pink clothes with my white shirts and i called you out on it, we ended up just fucking and i forgot completely about it”

“so you’re saying it worked” you fist bumped the air.

“what about me?” kuroo asked.

“i guess, if i had to name something it’d be your loud snores, loud chewing, forgetting to buy groceries, screaming at our television because kenma missed his sho-”

“okay okay i get it,” stopping you from continuing.

there were only a few more cards left when kuroo picked up the next one.

“are you happy for me now? be honest.”

“of course! you’re literally a professional volley player, basically a celebrity. i am honored i am one of the few that got to know you. you deserve everything that you have and you’re the realest person out there, tetsu” slipping out his nickname so casually, that you mentally screamed.

“thank you y/n, i really appreciate that.” he put his hand on yours with a warming smile, making it seem like he ignored it for your sake.

[why did you guys break up]

that was very tough question. both you stayed silent for a good second, wondering who will talk first.

“i-i’ll go first,

kuroo had been offered a job, fresh off of high school, while i decided to choose the local college. the job was to be a profession volleyball player... for the states. at first, he wasn’t going to take it, because it was too far from me. during our last few months of senior year, rumors about me and kenma circled around. nothing actually happened, but when kuroo asked me, i didn’t respond and...” you hesitated, kuroo’s eyes expressed the same pain from all those years ago.

you bit your lip before continuing, “because letting him think that made him let go and i couldn’t let myself hold him back y’know? it was just a situational breakup and i’m glad i made that decision. all was forgiven between him and kenma shortly after that by the way, just not with him and me.” you giggled at the end, to seemingly make it less awkward. your eyes were glossy— but, you had to confess your biggest secret.

you tried to look for a response from kuroo, but he just stayed silent. desperation started to tingle your skin.

then, kuroo did respond, by getting up from his seat and leaving you there, alone. tears now were freely falling on your face, in front of tons of people nonetheless.

“listen y/n, we can just not post this for privacy.” the director comforted.

“no it’s okay, a deals a deal kenma.” you waved off and left abruptly.

you slammed the doors open to the outside, with a cool breeze hitting your tears. you crouched in a position sobbing, while gasping for breath. he was the love of your life, and the thought of him never forgiving you really hurt.

“y/n”

you knew that voice. it was the same one just minutes ago laughing. you were so mentally drained that you thought you were hallucinating. it was only then when he wrapped his arms around you. you missed this. you missed the warmth of kuroo’s bear hugs.

“if you told me to stay i would’ve.” kuroo whispered into your ear.

“i know you would’ve, t-that’s why i h-had to do what i had to do. and now look at you, you’re rich, famous and... and” you stopped.

“you don’t have to say it y/n.” kuroo raised his voice in a serious manner.

“i-i have to or else i will never accept it nor get any closure.” you sighed, pushing him back out. looking into his eyes, they were also full of remorse, conflict, and sorrow.

as you try muster up the words, he crashed his lips against yours. immediately, you retaliate, knowing that it’s selfish but this was the last time you were ever going to be this vulnerable. the kiss screamed pain, and both of you tasted each other’s salty tears that were getting in the way.

when you finally came to your senses, you pulled away.

“if somehow we are both 40 and single, let’s meet at the place where we first met. until then, happy engagement.”

[wannabe-fic-writer]

All Over Again - Chapter 10

Summary: What was lost can be found. 

Warning: 18+ Smut, Language, Violence. 

Ch. 9

* * * * * *

A loud groan sounds as booted feet stomp into the Quinjet. 

Tension twists in the air, wrapping around each member of the team as they move about in silence. 

Sam, having just been the one groaning, frustratedly throws his mission issued earpiece into the wall. The little device breaks on impact, plastic chipping and sliding across the jet floor. 

Your eyes linger on a single broken piece, hands clenching into fists around the edge of the seats beside you. 

That priority mission that you’d all been preparing for for weeks just ended horribly. And you can’t figure out how everything went south.

One second you all were neutralizing the last of the threat, yourself and Sam heading toward the containment cells. And the next, the super powered that was supposed to be locked inside the cell was attacking you. 

They were quick, calculating. Every move you made they made a smarter, faster one. The fight left the two of you bruised and battered physically and mentally.

Admittedly this could’ve been much worse, had Wanda not been there to calm the brute there’s no telling what would’ve happened to you and the Falcon.

Said younger woman watches you with sad eyes. Losing sucks for her too but she can tell that it’s affected you a bit more. With a sigh, she moves to sit beside you, gentle fingers wrapping around your clenched ones. 

While your body relaxes at her touch, your posture remains stiff, eyes unmoving. All she can do is scoot closer, laying her head on your shoulder. 

With there being nothing to say the flight back to the compound is quiet. Wanda offers you her comfort the best she can and you accept it. 

The little bit that you do start to feel better goes away the instant the jet lands. You all head straight to debriefing and having to convey your failure to Steve makes you all the more upset. 

Among the many things you hate, failure is top of the list. Especially in instances such as these. 

You’d extracted enhanced individuals a number of times before, you know how to do it and how to do it damn good. To suddenly not do it well, makes you question yourself. 

It’s as you’re walking to your room that you encounter yet another frustration.

Well she isn’t exactly a frustration, or she wasn’t. With what has recently happened between yourself and the redhead there’s a tension in the air that could very well suffocate you. 

Even though she’s been giving you the space you asked for, you don’t miss those unreadable looks she gives you whenever you’re in the same room. And you know for a fact that she’s been talking to Wanda about you. The younger woman wouldn’t tell you what about specifically as she never wants to break Natasha’s trust in her, but she did tell you that Natasha asks about you. Having done the same in the past, you aren’t going to make a big deal of it and in a way, a small way, it’s nice to know she still cares.

Stopping in front of you, the redhead opens her mouth to speak, then shuts it to think. It takes a second for her to settle on,“ hey,” a hesitant pause,“ how was the mission?”

The heavy sigh you give makes her frown,“ not well. We lost the target.” Just repeating it makes you want to punch something. 

“Oh,” she grimaces. An awkward silence settles and instead of staying in it, you nod and retreat down the hallway to your room. 

Despite what use to work, the shower you take does absolutely nothing for your sour mood. In fact, other than soothing your aching muscles, the time you spend in there thinking about what happened pisses you off even more. 

You weren’t good enough to neutralize the target and now there’s no telling where they are and who they’re hurting. All these years spent trying to protect people and now you’re the very reason there’s a threat to innocent lives. 

Being so lost in thought, you hadn’t realized you were squeezing the life out of your phone. You slip it into your pocket before you break it and exit the room promptly. 

With a single destination in mind, you head down the hall, and straight back to the meeting room. As expected, Steve is still inside, eyes flickering over the mission reports you all filled out and the pre-mission information. You don’t expect Natasha to be just at his right as well but you don’t linger on that.

“Captain,” your hands press against the glass surface of the table,“ when are we going to look for this guy?”

His eyebrows pinch together as he looks up at you,“ Y/n we can’t do anything yet.” A sympathetic look masks his face which doesn’t help,“ I know this loss was big but-”

“This loss could lead to a lot of people getting hurt unnecessarily. That enhanced individual almost laid myself and Sam out and managed to escape even after Wanda got to him so just imagine what they could do to innocent unsuspecting civilians. We can’t sleep on this, if we don’t move soon somet-”

Natasha butts in, eyes as soft as ever,“ Y/n we aren’t sleeping on this. We’re going to catch this guy but if we rush in we can do more bad than good.”

Steve nods along,“ just try to relax. There’s already a team on standby when we’re ready to move.”

Your eyes narrow,“ I take it I’m not on that team.” Both of their silence is answer enough. So with a nod, you turn and leave. 

Why you weren’t on the team you don’t know. If you aren’t then you’re assuming neither are Wanda and Sam. This whole thing is about as personal to you as it is to everyone else. But you trust Steve’s leadership so whatever reason he has must be good.

Doesn’t mean you aren���t still frustrated.

In terms of instant relief, the message from Lena that comes through is number one. Just seeing her name alone decreases your heart rate. 

To then see that the message is a picture of her and your new found friends with the message ‘missing you’ beneath makes your heart soar. 

Suddenly you’re wondering how insane it’d be of you to fly out to NC. It wouldn’t be the first time so not too crazy. And you know that seeing Lena would make just about everything better. 

That’s how you find yourself, hours later after having prepped weapons for the team's mission, spoken with Cap, and talked to Wanda(who obviously understands your decision and supports it unwaveringly), stepping off a plane into National City airport.

You text Lena the second you’re in a car to find out where she is. Then telling the driver and sitting back, a little anxiously, for the ride to Al’s. 

When you get there, you thank them with a tip, and head into the bar with your duffle bag in hand. E/c eyes scan the building for the familiar group and before you can even spot them, your name is called very excitedly, and you’re enveloped in a strong hug seconds later. A blonde ponytail flips past your view as you return Kara’s hug. 

“It’s so great to see you.” She pulls away to reveal her bright smile,“ hi!”

Her enthusiasm brings a smile to your lips as well,“ hi.” That smile instantly grows as the brunette you’ve been longing to see walks over. Subconsciously you bite your lip, taking in the sight of her in her usual business attire, mainly the way those heels make her legs look even better. 

Lena stops in front of you, a happily surprised look in her eyes. As you two focus on each other, Kara takes slow quiet steps back. 

“Hope it’s okay that I just showed up, I didn’t have the best day and really needed to see you.” You give your honest explanation in hopes that you don’t seem crazy for flying across the country in the middle of the day.

The CEO’s expression softens even more, her hand reaching for yours,“ you okay?” Her eyebrows pinch together, thumb stroking the back of your hand, and she steps closer a little.

“Not really, it was pretty bad,” you sigh at the thought alone,“ seeing you makes it better though.” With your words you lean in and kiss her, a hand resting on her hip. 

Lena melts into it, hand gripping yours a little tighter as she presses further into the kiss. Weeks without your lips definitely did her in. She’s positive she won’t be able to let you go this time around. 

Finally pulling apart, only to quickly kiss once more, Lena tugs your hand towards the booths of your friends.

“Hey everyone.” You smile and wave. 

After a round of hugs and handshakes and being introduced to Kelly, James’ sister, you sit down beside Lena. The woman leans into you and you’re happy to wrap an arm around her shoulders. 

While the drinks and company are good, you still can’t bring yourself out of the rut your failed mission has put you in. Through your short laughs and on and off smiles, Lena picks up on it.

“Hey um,” she leans forward to look at everyone, grabbing the majority of their attention,“ I’m getting a little tired so we’re gonna go but we’ll see you all tomorrow night?” 

Kara’s the first to “awww” but nods understandingly. Yet another round of hugs is given before you and Lena are leaving out. She maintains her hold on your hand, occasionally looking up at you with a slightly worried expression. In all the time she’s known you she’s never seen you so torn up over something. Her plan is to find out what’s on your mind and fix it asap. 

So the second you’re in her apartment she’s fixing your usual drink and bringing you over to the couch. 

“Thanks,” you smile softly and sip the drink. The familiar burn of the scotch warms your insides and you give an almost inaudible sigh. 

“You want to tell me why your day was so bad?” Lena asks, taking a sip of her wine, and easing back into the couch. 

In one quick move, you turn and lay yourself across the couch, resting your head on Lena’s lap. An action that Lena welcomes with a soft smile, her heart swelling instantly. 

The woman sets her glass of wine to the side and hesitantly cards her fingers through your hair. Her soft touch is incredibly comforting. You find yourself nearly melting at the feeling, then remembering what she asked. 

There’s only so much you can tell her about the mission, especially seeing as it’s still pretty open ended. What you can tell you do and it’s enough for her to understand why you’re so upset. 

Groaning, you tilt your head back, further into her touch.“ - truthfully I just needed this. If I could have exactly this after every mission I’d be the happiest person alive. Scotch and you.” To emphasize your point, you take another quick sip of the drink and scoot further into Lena.

“Well,” she chuckles softly,“ if you lived here then you could have it.”

You freeze. Nothing moves but your eyes, e/c orbs landing on green as you search for seriousness. Finding it makes an eyebrow raise. Swallowing, you shift up a bit, elbows pressed into the cushions as the backs of your arms brush Lena’s thighs. 

It’s clear questioning in your eyes that has Lena’s head tilting to the side. A quick teasing smile hits her lips,“ what you don’t trust that I’m a good roommate?”

“What no I- would you seriously want to live together? You don’t think that’d be moving too fast?” You ask. Moving too fast could very well cause this whole thing to end in shit and you didn’t want to risk that.

The brunette shrugs,“ I don’t think so. I already know I love you Y/n and just these past few weeks without you has me more than willing to be with you everyday. If you don’t want to that’s okay but I’d be more than happy.”

Her words settle in your mind. While thinking about them, you end up lying back down. Lena’s eyes remain on you. She occasionally sips her wine and brushes her fingers across your hairline. 

Living with Lena would be incredible. Having spent a few nights with her here you can’t say you don’t love the idea of waking up to her every morning and possibly going to sleep with her every night. But moving would be more than just living with Lena. 

You’d definitely be leaving Wanda. Not having your best friend around daily, now that would suck. Moving would include becoming a remotely working Avenger or just leaving the team in general. What you lose in the team you’d gain in your friends here in NC. 

But then there’s finding a job that would fill that void in you. Helping people is you’re calling and you aren’t sure if being a cop or something would hold the same weight. And it’s not like you could walk up to Supergirl and the DEO and request a job. 

“What’s going on in that genius brain of yours?” Lena’s voice is soft, as if she doesn’t want to startle you.

Sighing, you tell her how you’d love to live with her but then share the drawbacks of moving from New York to National City. 

Her quirked eyebrow makes you curious.“ I could help with the job part.” She says with a proud little smirk.

“Yeah?”

“I work at the DEO.”

“Huh?” You frown, sitting up completely and turning to face her,“ I thought you worked at L-Corp.”

She nods,“ I do but I also work at the DEO. It was a brilliant business decision and a better way to help people. When the government supports your business there are more liberties.”

Point noted. She is right though. 

“Are you sure you want to live with me? My team would argue that I can be annoying. If you don’t believe me ask Wanda.” You say.

Lena’s fingers reach up and brush your cheek before she leans in and kisses you gently,“ I’m sure I can handle it.” She tells you, earning a soft chuckle in response. Her eyes scan your face and brighten with hope at the look she finds.“ You gonna come live with me Y/nn.”

You can feel the heat rush to your face at the nickname she uses but it’s cute, especially coming from her.

“I’d have to tell the team, square some things away, have a long talk with Wan, and make sure I get that DEO job,” you ramble off, noticing that Lena’s expression remains the same,“ yes I’m gonna move in with you.”

The brightest smile you’ve ever seen lights up her face and she wastes no time in pulling you into a hug. Her lips press a quick kiss to your neck in excitement,“ I can’t wait. And you don’t have to worry about the DEO job. I know you’re more than qualified.” 

When she pulls away, she tells you,“ leaving your home won’t be easy but I promise I’ll do whatever I can to make it easier for you.”

“I love you so much Lena Luthor.” You tell her.

“I love you too.” She kisses you for good measure.

As the two of you decide to go make something to eat, and that conversation replays in your head, you start to think of how you’ll tell the team and how they’ll react. Either way, you know you really want to live with Lena. 

* * * * * *

Taglist: @username23345 @depressed-bi-bitch @fayhar @trikruismybitch @marvel-wlw @aznblossom​ @chicken-wang09​ @bitchtits15 @coxmicbabygirl​ @blackluthxr @starlingelliot @vxidnik

[lady-o-ren]

Never Will I Love Thee

CHAPTER ONE  // Read on ao3 HERE

//

CHAPTER TWO

The King of Scotia has yet to arrive in the land of his betrothed. Has yet to taint the crystal waters that separates the royal castle from the mainland, perched impressively high on an islet and surrounded by a lush forest below. The Princess of Albíōn has also made herself scarce from the eyes of her uncle's court and has taken refuge in the soft leafy hollow of a giant oak tree that grows crooked and wild with ivy, it's branches fluttering with birdsong. Above her the evening sky smolders like a brushfire and though she feels the heat caress her cheeks, her blood burns cold as she waits for a fate far worse than death. Claire can only hope with every beat of her bleeding heart that the lateness of her horrid husband-to-be means he's suffered the same fate as his uncle. But she could never be so lucky. Not twice. Even now she can hear her name echo in the faraway distance and feels her heart stutter beneath her tunic knowing what news awaits her. Wishes for nothing more than to vanish into thin air. When she hears the voices of the guards carry closer on the breeze, she takes off with the swiftness of a hare with her plum velvet cloak billowing behind her. She knows she's only delaying the inevitable. Doesn't care if her uncle must grovel in apology on hand and knee to the man who's known to have a heart blacker than the devils. ‘Damn them both!’ She seethes. But as her eyes gloss with ire, her foot catches on some protruding underbrush and she takes a small tumble down a grassy slope, landing flat on her backside in a patch of clover and lavender with her willowy curls a veil over her face. Slowly, she props herself up with her hands and feels an immediate sting that makes her wince and curse at the heavens above for not breaking her neck. . . Just as another calls to her, scuffling down the slope. "Are ye a'right, lass?" 

She puffs at a fawn colored lock sticking to her lips and dryly replies "Never better" then looks up to see which of her guards the unfamiliar voice belongs to and is shocked to find a man clad in the white fur of a beast kneeling before her.

Without a moment's hesitation, he gently takes her hand in his, scraped red along the back, as she marvels at the perfection of his features glowing a ruddy bronze, at the dear gentleness that beams from his eyes a shade rarer than a sapphire. Claire would've thought him the most beautiful creature she'd ever seen. Would've let her heart swoon imagining how soft his lips might be, where they'd wander to. . . were it not for the dark flame of his hair that marks him like the vile stain of blood.

Unaware of the storm brewing before him, his attention still on her hand, the man who ought to be guarding every ounce of his flesh (particularly the one no man can live without) instead pulls a handkerchief from the sleeve of his doublet. "Ye have a nasty scrape there," he begins to say, wrapping the cloth around her hand. "Best to tend to it now then. . wait. . ." His voice trails off as he finally lifts his gaze to hers bristling like a jackal. "Your name, speak it,” she says, and snatches her injured hand away, pressing it against her chest. A small sad smile mars his mouth before he speaks. "Must I tell ye?" He mumbles low, sounding ashamed. But still he stands revealing a man as great as the mountains that bore him and takes a step back to bow with the grace of a knight, hand in sincere reverence at his breast. “I come to ye humbly, my lady, as the last living son of Elhen and Bhrian Dhu of Clan Fraser but also as the unfortunate heir to the mountain throne and I'm sure a wretch to yer sight, James Fraser.” “You're bloody worse than a wretch,” she hisses through the bite of her teeth, and scuffs her heel against the earth that sends a wave of dirt flying towards her intended, who shields himself with his cloak now speckled like a sparrow's egg. "And I'm no lady of yours nor will I ever be.” She stands to her full regal height, hands fisted, shaking at her side. "Even when we marry, when I'm forced to be shackled to you, you'll have no claim on me. Now leave my sight. I demand it of you.” “I canna do that,” he says firmly, coming close enough to engulf her in his shadow. “I must and will speak to you." Her throat bobs as he towers over her but she juts her chin upward. “Speak to me like chattel again and I'll have your tongue.”

The Red King furrows his brow at her threat, how her eyes flare like two coals on fire, but beneath that anger she rightfully has towards him he sees fear prick at the princess's eyes, bleeding her face white and grabbing at her throat as if his hand were there squeezing tight. He knew his name had been tainted from the years of being his uncle's pawn but for this woman to fear him so. . . That struck him deep in the gullet, sharp and brutal. “Forgive me, Your Highness,” he says from his heart, wracking a hand through his hair as he takes a step back. “I've been a soldier nearly my entire life and have little experience in matters such as these." 

He waves an uneasy hand in the air between them.

“But that's no excuse for being so forward wi’ ye. I had only wished to convey to ye that I am as much a prisoner to this arrangement between our uncle's as you.”

She scoffs at that. “Says the king with more power than any mortal man should have.” 

“Yer’re right. But dinna speak as if ye ken what I've suffered under my uncle's reign. What I've had to sacrifice to keep myself and my kin alive.” 

Indeed, Claire can see the harsh toll of unspoken grief and torment cross his face and darken his eyes before he masters his emotions, breathes the sweet air, and continues on.

“That's why I've come to your kingdom, sought ye out here amongst the trees and away from the meddlesome tongues of court advisors, because I needed to speak to ye in private. To tell ye I think it only right for ye to have yer say on who ye marry, who ye choose to love."

Claire questions him. “What are you saying?” 

He smiles gently at her - a lopsided, boyish curl of mouth that could charm honey from a bee. Encourage a lass to say I do.

“That the choice for us to marry is yers and yers alone. I willna force myself on ye.”

His words echo in her heart that thumps with quiet hope yet she eyes him with suspicion, refusing to trust the King before her.

Refusing she could ever be so lucky. Not twice.

//

A/N: I tried to write more (I'm a pushover). Good or Bad?? Delete or not?? I'm still struggling with all this proper lingo. Think of this as a god awful WIP. 

Also I remember seeing some fanart for Jon Snow with some white fur draped around him and didn't know if it was a dire wolf or what. But that's what Jamie's wearing.

[bbyannabeth]

Can you write a percabeth fic where Percy thinks he was annabeths 2nd choice and annabeth would have chosen luke had he been alive and annabeth is surprised that he thinks that???

i LOVED this prompt and i hope i did it justice

Percy sat on the sand of the beach, staring out at the water. Something was just off today and he didn’t like the heavy feeling on his chest. He felt distant from everyone. And as wrong as it was, he felt insignificant. Which was kind of odd considering he’d saved the world twice.

He knew it was irrational to feel that way because objectively, he was important. But today, it felt like he could walk into the ocean and stay down there for a week before anyone noticed.

“Hey, there you are!”

Well, anyone aside from Annabeth.

She sat next to him, leaning against his arm. Her gray eyes sparkled as she smiled at him. “You worried me there for a minute, I’ve been looking everywhere for you. I guess I should’ve known you’d be here,” she said, reaching out to slip her hand into his.

“Yeah, I’ve been here for a bit. Sorry,” he said quietly. His tone was somber and Annabeth caught it immediately, her smile fading.

“You okay?” she asked, squeezing his hand gently. He shrugged, unsure of how to convey what he was feeling right now. Annabeth nodded slowly. “Did you want to be alone?” she whispered.

Percy hesitated. He knew it would take a simple nod of his head and she’d leave him there, but that was suddenly the last thing he wanted. He shook his head, finally meeting her eyes. She gave him a small smile and pressed a gentle kiss to his shoulder. “Do you wanna talk about it?”

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly. “Maybe.”

“Okay.” With that, she scooted closer and turned to throw her legs over his, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. His arm slid around her waist while his other hand rested on her knee and he already felt a little lighter. She lifted her hand and lightly tapped his temple. “What’s going on in that seaweed brain of yours?” she asked softly, affection and concern clear in her voice.

Percy took a deep breath as he tried to get his thoughts in order. “I’m not sure. It’s dumb but I feel kind of… unimportant, I guess.”

“Why’s that?”

He broke eye contact and looked at his hand where he was tracing tiny circles on her knee with his finger. “I don’t know. I just feel… like I could disappear and no one would notice,” he muttered, regretting the words as soon as they came out. Annabeth placed her fingertips on his jaw and turned his head until he was facing her again. The look in her eyes and the words he knew she was about to say was the exact reason he regretted saying it.

“You did disappear,” she whispered. “A lot of people noticed. A lot of people cared.”

“I know. Sorry.”

She smiled softly with glassy eyes, which made guilt grow in his chest. He hadn’t wanted to make her cry. Annabeth held her hand against his cheek. “And you’re insane if you think I’d ever just let you disappear again,” she said with a thick voice. “You’re my best friend and the love of my life. I’ll be storming Olympus all by myself if you disappear again.”

The words should’ve comforted him, and they did somewhat, but there was a bitter taste in his mouth as he was reminded of another jealous thought he’d had for a while now. “By default,” he mumbled.

The fingers that had been running through his hair froze as she blinked. “What?”

He bit his lip and dropped his gaze again, ashamed to even have these thoughts. “I mean with Luke gone…” he trailed off. Annabeth tensed the way she always did when someone talked about Luke.

“What are you talking about?” she asked.

He sighed and his finger traced the shape of a heart on her skin. “If Luke hadn’t died or ever turned to Kronos’s side, I would’ve never stood a chance at being with you. So it’s kind of like you picked me by default,” he said quietly, hating the underlying anguish in his voice.

When she was silent for too long, Percy looked up at Annabeth to see her in shock, studying him. “You think that?” she whispered, astonished.

“I mean am I wrong?” he asked with a shrug, his head turning to face the ocean.

“Yes,” she said without hesitation, moving her hand to his cheek again to redirect his gaze back to her. “I never would’ve been with him. For so many reasons, but you’re the main one. He could be alive and, you know, not evil and I would still be sat here with you just the same.”

“You liked him,” Percy muttered weakly. But even with saying that, he did believe her. She’d said those words with so much honesty and conviction, there was no way he couldn’t believe her.

“When I was, like, eleven. And even then, I idolized him more than I actually liked him. He was always like a big brother to me,” she said before leaning closer until their faces were a few inches apart. “You were different. I never liked him the way I liked you. He never stood a chance against you.”

“Okay,” he whispered after a moment. “I’m sorry.”

Annabeth pulled him into a kiss and Percy poured every ounce of love he had for her into it, tightening his grip on her waist. In between kisses, she mumbled, “I love you. So much. Only you. It’s always been you.”

Percy pulled away and said, “I love you, too. Thank you.”

“Anytime,” she replied earnestly. Then, with a hint of amusement, “Also, he was, like, seven years older than me. So it never would’ve happened anyway because ew.”

[desertofsnowflakes]

Incorrect Order Chapter 5 (Nessian AU)

A/N: Do inform me if you wanna be added/removed from the taglist! If you happen to find my storyline similar to another fic or one of yours, I'm extremely sorry, I might've just not known. All characters belong to the author Sarah J. Mass. Enjoy!

Summary: Don't first impressions always affect the way you see someone? Well, what more with the Nesta Archeron? Nesta meets Cassian at few unexpected places and to say it didn't go well was a major understatement. Certain circumstances make them become enemies to tolerable company to friends to lovers.

Trigger Warnings: Swearing, an angry Nesta and a heart-broken Cassian

2094 words | Incorrect Order Masterlist | Read on AO3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nesta had never been one for small talk but in his presence she spoke as if she was excellent in small talk. They spoke of all unimportant things and ended up forgetting the important stuff; their names. Again.

Feyre sent an invitation for her first anniversary party as she did for every other occasion. The only thing different was that Nesta never bothered to pay heed to her invitations before. After the day in the alley, however, she decided she was going to turn over a new leaf. This was her first step.

She checked her reflection on the side-mirror. She tried to keep her outfit and make-up as simple as possible. She only wore a white ruffled-sleeved blouse with a black pencil skirt. Her hair was braided into a coronet. She looked good, but not as good as she’ll look if she took her own time to do a detailed make-over. She let out a breath and braced herself for the inevitable little chat with her sisters.

“Nesta?” a bewildered voice breathed. She whirled around to face her younger sister, Elain, looking up at her, a small smile playing about her lips. “You’re here,” she said and flung her arms around Nesta. Nesta automatically wrapped her arms around Elain’s smaller frame. Eventually, Elain pulled back.

“No offense, but I really thought you wouldn’t be coming,” Elain said.

Nesta felt as if the smile on her face couldn't be wiped out for the next few hours. “Honestly, I didn't think I'd come either. But here I am.”

She nodded and pulled Nesta to the garden the party was held at.

“I did this,” Elain said. “This garden, I planted and groomed all this.”

“No wonder why it looks so beautiful,” Nesta replied.

She flushed and said contemplatively, “You're so different now, Nesta.”

“I hope in a good way. Where's Feyre?”

“Let's go meet everyone first.”

Nesta shook her head. “I— I need to talk to both of you before I meet everyone else. ”

Elain hesitated then said, “Can you wait in that room? I'll fetch Feyre and come.”

Nesta nodded and headed to the door at the end of the garden Elain pointed at. The room was classy, much like the exterior of the house. She was struck by the simple yet grand theme of Feyre's house. She knew he and his brothers were rich but she just didn't understand the extent of their wealth. Till now.

“What are you thinking?” Feyre wasn't the type to blindly trust people. It took more than coming for her anniversary to persuade her that Nesta's intentions were good.

Nesta faced Feyre, her youngest sister, who stood before her, gorgeous yet fierce in a simple but elegant blue gown. She shrugged, “Just thinking that I'm glad my sisters were well-provided when I couldn't take care of them.”

Feyre’s face didn’t change, she just gestured towards the couches. “Have a seat,” she said.

Nesta sat down, “You both look splendid,” she said. Feyre said that the gown was a gift, Elain thanked Nesta and offered the same.

Nesta cleared her throat. “I need to tell the both of you something. Many things, actually.”

Elain nodded encouragingly. Feyre said, “Go on.”

So Nesta spoke. She apologised. For how she wasn't there to fulfill the role of an elder sister. For how she failed to attend Feyre's marriage and many other occasions. For all the rude words she spoke to them. For shunning them. She apologised for being self consumed. For everything else.

She also promised. To try harder. To become better. To be a good sister and sister-in-law. To be with them at all times, especially when they needed her. And they listened.

“I know these words aren't enough, but I'll try to make it so,” she finished, her hands clasped with both her sisters on her sides.

“You said you'll try, Nesta. We will too,” Feyre said.

“I see a very bright future ahead of us,” Elain said.

Nesta couldn't help the tears anymore. She folded her arms around her sisters and tucked them close. Her sisters. Her beloved sisters she now knew she'd do anything to protect.

“I see a very bright future too,” Nesta said.

Nesta pulled back after what felt like an hour and looked at her sisters' tear-streaked faces.

“I love you,” the three of them said simultaneously. Nesta giggled. Elain laughed. Feyre stared.

Nesta gently brushed the tears from both of their cheeks. “I don't want to see any of you crying.”

She hugged them again, willing the hug to convey everything she didn't say out loud.

“Now, now, enough snuggling. We've got a party to attend and people to meet, remember?” Feyre said.

***

Cassian was anxious. He had always hoped Nesta, his sister-in-law, would come for the gatherings they had; be it family dinners, or birthday parties, or the random meetings they had when they just got tipsy and played games. He hadn't seen her face-to-face before. All he knows about Nesta are from the descriptions from Feyre and Elain. That, too, was minimal. One of them would quickly change the topic to something pleasant the moment traces of an emotional breakdown were visible. Every time he hoped, he was let down. She never came. He vowed he would stop hoping and instead just go about and act as if she didn't exist. But that never happened. Every time his family met, his treacherous heart would start hoping only to have a chunk of it fall off when she failed to attend. Today was no different.

Then there’s the woman who he’d been talking to the whole afternoon. He was a tangled up mess of emotions and doubt and confusion. He had been sort-of pining after Nesta. She was exactly the person he’d like. Apparently she was drop-dead gorgeous, witty and… feral. Feyre said that. Feral. She’d be someone worth seeing. She was totally a worthy opponent. It’d be fun. But the other woman? Mother above, she was ethereal. More than ethereal, in fact. Words can't contain what he had to say about her.

He was damn near killing Az for calling him right when they were about to exchange names. He really can't believe he was a hairsbreadth away from knowing her before it was all ripped away. Now they were back to square one. He didn't know anything about her.

Azriel clapped him on his back so hard that he almost stumbled and fell. Or probably that was because he was too distracted. “All good Somm?”

“Mmm-hmm,” he replied noncommittally. He busied his hands with re-rinsing the champagne flutes and wiping them clean again. He did this two times already. Still.

“Mood is sour today, Cass?” Az teased, mock-frowning.

“Nah,” Cassian said wryly, “it's as sweet as honeydew. Especially today, when my chat got interrupted.” He glared at Azriel.

“Now, now, that is a story for another day. For now though, I think I've got something that can cheer up your brooding self.”

“What is it?” he mumbled.

Az grinned. “Nesta is here.”

***

Feyre and Elain took Nesta on a quick tour around the house. Feyre’s paintings were hung on the walls throughout the whole house. Nesta grimly noticed that there wasn't a single picture of her. There were even paintings of their father whose heart had long stopped beating. But none of hers. If only she didn’t push herself away, Nesta would’ve been a happy part of her sisters’ lives.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. Feyre took her hand in hers. Elain tucked herself to Nesta’s side, wrapping her arms over her slender shoulders.

Nesta already met Mor, a stunning blonde woman, and Amren, a slightly intimidating and short person. Now she only had to meet her brother-in-laws.

“Let’s go meet the boys!” Elain said brightly.

We walked back to the garden. Feyre seemed to get more and more elated the closer we got to the garden. Huh. Probably falling in love would do that to someone. Anyway, as long as her sisters were happy.

They stepped through the doorway. The garden was decorated with more banners and streamers hung on the back of chairs and on the low branches. Again, it looked opulent in a simple way.

There were three men in the centre of the garden, gathered around a table. They all were slightly similar, broad shouldered, tapered waists, muscular limbs. Three of them wore formal shirts and pants clinging to their frames. The one in the middle was Rhysand, she supposed. She smirked internally. Of course Feyre ended up with this guy. She's got a good taste. Must've gotten it from the oldest sister.

The one on the right, though. His figure felt familiar. Very, very familiar. She couldn't quite put a finger on it yet.

“The one on the left is Azriel, the one on the right is Cassian,” Feyre said, and Nesta nodded.

The boys must be really engrossed with their conversation. They hadn't noticed the three of them yet.

The guy she thought was familiar threw his head back and laughed. She gasped. That laugh. She'd know the laugh anywhere. Indeed, when he angled his face so that she could get a glimpse, she knew she was done for. She swallowed with much difficulty.

“I need to go,” she said quickly.

“Go? But— but we haven't cut the cake yet. It's still early. We've got lots more fun stuff,” Elain said.

“You said you'll try, Nesta. Only, this doesn't feel like 'trying',” Feyre said.

They sounded… hurt.

Mother above, I'm doing this wrong.

“Nesta?” Elain asked. “Is something wrong?”

“Yeah,” Feyre added, “you look pale.”

“Y-yeah it's f-fine. Kinda. My head hurts,” she said, accidentally clutching her stomach. “I-I mean, yeah my head hurts. Very badly. I gotta go.” She looked helplessly at both of them. “I'm so sorry. I really am. It's just— I think I need rest. I'll recompense. Probably dinner in three days?” They both shared a look and agreed.

Nesta was already walking away. “Love you both,” she threw over her shoulder.

***

“Feyre!” Rhys called. He beckoned Feyre and Elain to the table. He didn't see Nesta.

Cassian lightly kissed Feyre on her cheek once they made their way to the table and said, “Gorgeous as always. Happy anniversary!”

Feyre grinned, but it showed traces of disappointment.

He frowned. “Hey, what's wrong?”

She just shook her head and mumbled, “Nesta.” Rhys's face hardened. His brother was never fond of Nesta. He said that she was why Feyre was always worried.

“Where's Nesta?” Az asked, craning his neck to see behind farther.

“She… left,” Elain pointed, revealing a figure disappearing behind the gates. A figure he knew all too well. Shitshitshitshit.

His head snapped back to his brothers. “That is Nesta?” he damn near shouted.

Rhys scowled, “Yeah.”

No wonder why she's so beautiful, he thought dumbly before running after her with a quick “I'll be back.”

***

Nesta was wrong. In all her happiness of being reunited with her sisters, she completely forgot how even a small thing can break one's smile. She felt like she couldn't breathe. She kept her calm demeanour, but inside, she was a raging storm of emotions.

One step in front of the other, she kept reminding herself.

She kept walking. Even when she heard footsteps. Even when the steps got louder. Even as he got close enough to cease running.

But not when he called her name. She halted. Locked up her emotions. She knew she shouldn't but she turned around anyway.

“What do you want?” she snapped.

“Nesta,” he breathed. She tried to hold back her shudder. It was from the night air, she told herself.

“If you have nothing to say, do let me know. I'm not going to wait forever,” she said. Harsher than she intended to. But she didn't care, at least, that's what she told herself.

Cassian winked, “I'm honored you came, sweetheart. I'll pass the credit to my influence on you. ”

She ground her teeth against the truth threatening to fall off her lips. Yes, I came here because you made me happy. And I thought that if I tried, as I did with you, I can rebuild my relationship with my sisters.

***

Cassian did something stupid. He grabbed her hand. Her eyes snapped to his, burning with anger. Like the day they first met.

He gave her a crooked grin that he knew would drive her mad. Well, more than she already was. He tilted his head to the garden, “The party is that way, love.”

She snatched back her hand at continued walking. Like a fool, he followed. “I spoke to my sisters. Told them I won't be staying tonight. And that we'll have dinner in three day's time. Does that satisfy you? Now, can you stop following me?”

“Something's wrong. What's wrong, Nes?”

“One,” she ground out, “don't call me that. Two, I'm a grown-ass woman; I know how to take care of myself. I don't need a babysitter.”

“You did. That day,” he said quietly.

She whirled on him, “Is this you taking back favours? Because I'm not interested. You want money? Take it. Tell me your price and fucking take it! Don't tread on my heels because you helped me, okay? I've got way better things to do.” She paused, “And don't follow me, Cassian.”

She turned and stalked away.

You want money? Take it. 'Take it.' As if he were a beggar, asking for alms. As if they weren't laughing at each other's jokes not more than an hour ago. As if he didn't spend a week taking care of her as if she were a part of his soul. Maybe she was.

But that was before, Cassian thought as his heart cleaved into two perfect halves. No— it smashed to a million tiny pieces.

He waited till Nesta was out of his line of sight. He turned and walked back to the garden, leaving his heart behind.

taglist: @shadowsinger07 @im-someone-i-guess @saltyfortunes @cressjacquine @julian-blackthorn-supremacy @champanheandluxxury @zemiraa @ladygabrielli1997 @nehemikkele @heartless--aromantic @sv0430 @ddsworldofbooks @irenethaleia @sjm-things @dontgetsalmonella

[fizzysugarwater]

Uhhh no title for this one

This is just the product of my brain when I ask “What if Cole had had Enough of Jay skirting around his actual attempts at flirting and passing them off as him trying to get with Nya, and got fed up with him and at the ToE duel just kissed him on the moUTH-” Enjoy!

A/N: I use fessin’ as a ninjagan version of frickin bc I physically cannot imagine jay saying frick, but he doesn’t swear in this so. also fessin sounds like someone tryna pronounce FSM phonetically (which is a thing I’ll talk about in my ninjagan expletives hc post in the near future)

Out on the hexagon tiles of Chen’s arena, Jay felt a strange kind of aching in his chest. A tugging, sinking feeling. Like somewhere in his heart he didn’t want to be fighting Cole.

And he didn’t! Not like this. Sure, he was still mad about seeming to have lost Nya to him, but there seemed to be more to it than that. He had… small inklings, that his and Nya’s breaking up was due to grief, the toll Zane’s death had on all of them. The longer he thought about it, the more he figured it was mostly grief, the rest being dysfunction on his part. Losing Nya was his fault, Cole had nothing to do with it. But Jay wasn’t ready to face that, so he kept blaming Cole. 

But… he didn’t want to do this. He didn’t wanna fight him for the right to keep his powers, he didn’t wanna fight him to settle a score, he didn’t wanna fight him at all! Fessin’ hell, it was easier to hate him from a distance. Now, here? His heart kept aching for him. For… Cole.

Jay didn’t recall much of how the fight played out in the early beats. Just throwing earth and lightning around, and yelling at each other. Even when he was fighting with all he had, Cole seemed to have this hesitance about him. Nothing like when they were sparring, or when Jay watched him kick ass against a common enemy. Against him, Cole hesitated. And seemed to grow more agitated with every word out of Jay’s mouth.

Eventually he reached a breaking point. Cole looked mad, like right pissed, and he managed to get close enough to pull a stunt Jay never expected. This part he remembered vividly.

“Okay, fine. Fine!! You wanna know why I’m mad about this still, sparkmouth??? You REALLY wanna know?!” Cole shouted at Jay, having him backed practically against the wall with stalagmites on either side. Jay kept his fists up, not sure what Cole was about to do. Of course, there wasn’t much he could do when Cole outclassed him on a purely physical level. The earth ninja grabbed the front of his shirt and lifted Jay off his feet, slamming him into the wall. Jay yelped in surprise and pain, and for a second he caught sight of Cole’s glaring face, filled with a kind of meaning Jay wasn’t expecting. His breath would’ve hitched, if something else hadn’t happened not a moment later.

Cole kissed him. 

He fessin’ kissed him, and the kiss filled Jay’s senses all at once. Maybe it was the exertion they had both been doing but it was… warm, in a good way. Soft, too. Cole’s eyes were shut tight, while Jay’s were wide open, too shocked not to. A loop of WHAT WHAT WHAT kept playing in his brain, and he felt his whole face go red, all the way to his ears. The most jarring part of this was his desire to return it, to kiss back. I mean, sure, Jay may have had ridiculously strong feelings for Cole back during those couple of weeks when it was just them at the monastery! Sure, those feelings may have never actually subsided and he had to catch himself months later to stop staring at Cole when he was training in the courtyard and just looking - yknow. Hot. Sure, this moment being as confusing and fantastic as it was may have sprung those feelings back full force, and Jay really, really wanted to make out with this dumbass for like, another five minutes. Maybe so.

What was happening again? Oh yeah. Jay was being kissed, hard, by the guy he never got over. In the middle of an arena. Oh yeah, we’re supposed to be fighting. And people are seeing this. Oh hell, Kai and Lloyd are seeing this too!

Finally, Cole pulled back, still pinning Jay to the wall, and Jay sucked in a breath, realizing that he wasn’t even trying to breathe there. He glanced up at Cole after a second, absolutely bewildered, and was met with a red-faced gaze from a normally-stoic, suddenly embarrassed master of earth, staring back at him with so much meaning.

“That is why, Jay. That is why I’m still mad,” Cole said breathlessly. And despite the thousands of thoughts running through Jay’s head, one managed to slip out.

“Huh??? That doesn’t explain a thing!” Jay blurted out. Cole’s eyebrows shot up and he looked something like a deer in headlights, blinking at Jay and turning even redder.

“Uh-“ Cole choked out, like he was a little surprised that his kissing skills didn’t convey the meaning he wanted. He didn’t get the chance to say anything else, because a frustrated groan sounded from above them in the stands. Chen was clearly very upset with this turn of events, and Jay was subconsciously offended. Excuse you, we’re having a moment here!

“Ughhhhhhhh, you’re supposed to be fighting each other!!!!!” Chen smacked his chair buttons a bit and glared down at the pair of them. “Send in the Condrai Crushers! That will get them fighting again!”

A door opened up in the wall of the arena, and Cole promptly dropped Jay and whirled around, cursing under his breath. Jay landed on his feet, and was looking to where Cole was as two large vehicles rolled out into the pit, both outfitted with extremely sharp implements. Jay’s breath caught, and before he had a chance to react Cole grabbed him by the wrist and dashed away from them.

“Wh- Hey!” Jay protested, wrenching his arm out of Cole’s grip and running to keep pace with him. “This conversation isn’t over, boulderbrain! What the hell was that supposed to mean?!” Cole glanced at him, then groaned slightly, skidding to a stop and whirling around to face the crushers again, stamping hard on the tiles and kicking up a large rock at one of them. Then he turned and looked at Jay, brow half-furrowed.

“The reason I’m still mad with you is because you still think I’m trying to take Nya from you or some bullshit like that. Even after every master-damned hint I keep shoving in your face!” Despite the situation he let out a dry laugh and pushed hair out of his face. “It is honestly baffling how you can be so ridiculously, beautifully smart and also so stupid at the same time!”

“Huh???” Jay squeaked. “I- wha- beautifully smart???” Wow, way to go that THAT’S what we latch onto. He shook his head out to clear his ears, then heard the thrum of the motor of the other crusher, behind them and dove sideways into Cole, knocking them both to the center. Once there, he stood up and kept talking. “So you’re not...?”

“OF COURSE NOT!! Fuckin hell, Jay, I never had any interest in Nya like that! She’s my workout buddy, but that’s it!” Cole pushed his hair off his face again, and shook his head. Jay couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“B-but I thought- th-the soulmate machine-“

“Was a prototype, and a tourist trap kind of attraction and I don’t know why you trusted it! Seriously, I still don’t get how you trusted that thing over me.” Cole chucked another boulder at one of the crushers, flipping it over. He turned back to Jay with just this nervous smile that made Jay’s heart flutter. The lightning master stuttered, trying to figure it all out.

“So then- it was- wait, it was me? You’re in love with me?” Jay finally put the pieces together. Cole just lit up once Jay admitted he figured that out, a bright grin plastering onto his face, and then they jumped apart into spinjitzu to dodge before joining up again. Cole grabbed both of Jay’s shoulders and kept grinning, a frankly adorable look.

“YES! Jay, you stupid gorgeous bastard, yes it was you! It was you the whole time! Still is, actually!” Cole looked almost like he was gonna cry, cry happy tears at least. Jay looked rather flabbergasted.

 Admittedly, Jay was still figuring this out, because what???

The whole time? The whole time, when Jay thought Cole was interested in Nya, Cole was in love with… him? With Jay? It felt like something out of a cheesy rom-com. Or one of his daydreams. The fact that he had to make this realization while dodging out of the way of a very sharp vehicle did not help matters.

Jay was suddenly wrenched out of his thoughts when he realized the remaining crusher was coming right at them. He had to act fast, so he dashed at the wall, ran up and sprang off of it, landing behind the driver of that one. He then proceeded to fry the living daylights out of the driver, until he was incapacitated and the thing came to a stop, just in front of Cole.

Jay hopped off again and came right up to Cole, mind spinning. He may not have had everything together, but he did have something he needed to do, to at least tell him without telling him.

“Are you serious with this? Are you genuinely, actually serious about this, Cole?” About me? Jay didn’t add. He looked up into Cole’s eyes, trying to convey about the same meaning to him as he was earlier. Cole froze, for a second all deer-in-headlights again, but then nodded.

“Yes I mean it. I am seriously in love with you,” he said, with all the conviction in the world. Jay looked up at him, took a small breath, then popped up on his tiptoes and kissed him.

In all honesty, this kiss was far shorter than the earlier one. It was small, and sweet, and soft (fessin’ hell his lips were soft) but it got the point Jay wanted to make across, clear as day. He cupped Cole’s face for a short moment, then dropped back down to his feet and was met with a rather starstruck look from Cole, to which Jay couldn’t help but smile. He almost didn’t register the audience they were still before, offering an “awww”, before he heard it drowned out by the whining of Chen.

“... okay, good, glad we got that squared aWAY-“ Jay started to say, before the floor tile he was standing on suddenly dropped out from under him. He yelped, but was very quickly grabbed in a bear-hug by Cole, keeping him from plummeting. With a start, Jay realized the arena floor tiles were disappearing into a pit at a rapid rate. “Crap, Cole!! The Jade Blade!” He pointed up at the knife stuck into the top of the central pillar.

Cole seemed to be on the same wavelength as Jay again, and holy crap was that a feeling Jay missed. “Cmon!” Cole barked, grabbing Jay by the hand and starting to dash forward to the center pole again, hopping from tile to tile as they dropped. Jay tried for a second to ignore his heart fluttering again when Cole gripped his hand - jeez I’ve really got it bad - and instead yelped in fear when he let go for a fleeting moment and got cut off by the ever-increasing pit. Separated now.

Cole whipped around for a second, eyes full of worry. Jay frantically shook his head. “Go, go!” He yelled, and Cole hesitated another beat before turning back around and sprinting for the pillar, then climbing it, then-

Once the blade was pulled the tiles stopped falling. For a very short moment it went quiet. Then Jay caught sight of something hurtling to him and he caught it on instinct. And then he looked down at it in his hands and-

What?

The Jade Blade. It was the Jade Blade, and he was holding it. Jay’s eyes darted back up to see Cole at the top of the pillar, looking down at him with a look of determination.

“WINNER!” Chen’s voice rang out over the announcement but Jay wasn’t processing it, still looking at Cole. Cole gave me the win. Why? He knows what happens when he loses, and I lost! What is he-

“Jay it’s gonna be okay, you hear me? We’ll figure it out. I want you to keep going,” Cole spoke up, landing back on the arena floor several feet away. He looked pained, but he was smiling all the way through it. There was an ache in Jay’s chest again, for Cole. “You keep going, zaptrap, and you win this thing for both of us, okay?”

“Cole, I- wh- we can’t just leave it like this!” Jay found himself blurting, frantic and scared. This CANNOT be how this goes, I barely even got time to get into it! The whys, the since-whens, all of it!

“You’re gonna be alright, Jay! I’ll see you. I’ll see you on the other siIDE!” Cole’s last word was cut off, as he was suddenly dropped into the pit below the arena. 

Jay could’ve screamed because it wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fair that they didn’t have any time to talk about this. He wanted to talk, he wanted to tell him all these reasons why he was so hopelessly in love with him and for a brief moment he was scared he’d never get the chance, now.

Instead, he just found himself reaching for the spot where Cole fell, feeling tears pricking at his eyes as the door in the wall opened again and Chen’s men ushered him back through to the others.

It shouldn’t be ending like this.

[hysterialevi]

Hjarta | Chapter 4

Fanfic summary: In an AU where Eivor was adopted by Randvi’s family instead, he ends up falling in love with the man his sister has been promised to despite the arranged marriage between their clans.

Point of view: third-person

Pairing: Sigurd Styrbjornson x Male Eivor

This story is also on AO3 | Previous chapter | Next chapter

THE NEXT MORNING

BJORNHEIMR, THE LONGHOUSE

“...His eyes burned bright with the heat of Muspelheim itself...” Eivor whispered in fascination, repeating the seeress’ prediction under his breath. At the moment, he was lying in bed after waking up from a long night of vivid dreams and visions, mindlessly tracing a series of words in the air above him as he conjured a poem about his new friend.

“I wish you could’ve met him, father.” He thought aloud. “He was... unlike any other man I’ve ever laid eyes upon. A warrior’s hugr entrapped within the shell of a human, kindled by the heart of a benevolent spirit. His unyielding gaze holding you in place as the songs of those long lost flutter from his lips. A man who seems to be from this world, and yet, beholds it with the look of an outsider.”

Eivor rolled onto his side, staring at the charms sitting beside his bed as his hair spread out underneath him like a fan made of flaxen twine.

“...Was Sigurd the man Ingrida saw in her dream? He must have been. He matched her words exactly. But... how does the wolf fit into all this? Who does the beast represent? Who would try to harm him? And why?”

Part of Eivor suspected it could’ve even been himself that the seeress’ vision was trying to convey, considering his rather violent past with wolves, but... surely that couldn’t be right. Sigurd was to live among them as an ally in the future. What reason would he have to go against him? 

...No. It must’ve been someone else. Kjotve possibly? Or his son, Gorm? Eivor wasn’t sure anymore. And frankly, he didn’t want to think about it. 

So much was already clouding his mind with thoughts of impending war and death. Many of their people had fallen to Kjotve’s axe in the past decade, and he only hoped that this marriage would be the key to finally wiping him off the face of the earth. To think that Ingrida’s warning could become a reality... it was a concern that Eivor wished to push aside for the moment.

He had enough to worry about aside from the seeress’ visions, and he didn’t want to lend them anymore merit.

Tearing himself away from the bed’s soft embrace, Eivor finally decided to carry on with his day and slipped out from underneath the layers of pelts piled on top of him, reaching for his boots.

His eyelids sagged with a heavy sense of fatigue due to the restless night he had to endure, and he felt his body being weighed down by a strong desire to return to sleep. Despite his lack of energy however, Eivor couldn’t deny that he was curious to see whether or not he’d bump into Sigurd again.

The man seemed to operate on a tight schedule filled to the brim with royal duties, but Eivor was secretly hoping that he’d be able to catch him in between. He may have been restraining himself from taking things any further with Sigurd, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t willing to spend more time with him.

He just hoped he wouldn’t come across as clingy. He already found himself feeling more attached to the prince than what was probably wise, and he didn’t even know if the man returned his affections. Sigurd claimed that he would’ve liked to see Eivor again, but even then, the younger man wanted to maintain a reasonable amount of distance between them.

The wedding was less than two weeks away, after all. If any of their plans happened to deteriorate before then, Eivor wasn’t sure they’d have any time to recuperate. Kjotve’s longships still threatened the borders of their seas despite their brewing alliance, and any distractions would’ve simply given them the opening they needed.

Eivor had to stay focused for both his sister and his clan. His current responsibilities consisted of nothing more than providing a reliable axe should the need for war arise, and he didn’t see that changing anytime soon.

~~~~~~~~~~

A FEW MINUTES LATER

Stepping away from the limits of the longhouse, Eivor slowly made his way to the top of the hill that he frequented so often as Synin followed him from the skies above, accompanying him with no more than a distant shadow that slithered across the ground.

The morning air was crisp with a frigid breeze that pinched Eivor’s skin and reinforced the snow on Bjornheimr’s meadows, covering the land in a scintillating sea of white. 

Meanwhile, the sun stood proudly above the sleepy village and combatted the arctic environment with a gentle summer’s kiss, thawing the many icicles that dangled from the longhouse’s roof ever so slightly.

As for Eivor, the young man trekked through the icy weather with little to no issue thanks to his fur cloak and climbed the hill’s gradual incline, adapting quickly to its uneven terrain.

He may have been tired, but the frosty sensation of the morning’s touch managed to revitalize his mind, and stimulate him with a chilled gust. It reawakened the parts of his brain that stayed enveloped in a deep slumber, and filled his lungs with a piercing breath of fresh air that caused him to sigh in contentment.

What awaited him at the top of the hill however, surprised him more than anything else.

Sitting alone on the very same bench from the previous night, Eivor spotted Sigurd admiring the angelic daybreak in front of him as loose strands of his hair billowed softly in the breeze, dancing in unison with the fur on his cloak. 

His staunch figure had darkened into a silhouette due to the sun’s contrasting light, and his head remained bowed beneath his broad shoulders in a serene manner. 

He appeared to be completely at peace despite the gravity of his purpose in Bjornheimr, and basked in the golden rays that peeked over the horizon. He was completely motionless in the fjord’s presence, but seemed to travel freely with the stretches of his imagination.

Though, Eivor could only wonder whether Sigurd was here for the view, or for the man himself.

“Hello, Gunnar.” The younger man teased, making the prince throw a glance over his shoulder.

Sigurd’s expression instantly brightened at the sight of his new friend, and a light chuckle escaped his mouth. “Ah, hello, Eivor. It’s good to see you again.”

Eivor strolled towards the bench, gesturing to the nature in front of them.

“Come to enjoy the view?”

“Indeed,” Sigurd said, rising from his seat. “I just finished making an offering to Njord at your temple for our safe journey, and wished to see what it looked like during the day. I have to say, it’s just as beautiful as when you brought me here last night.”

Eivor leaned against a tree, crossing his arms in a casual fashion. “You stopped by the temple? Did you meet our seeress?”

Sigurd nodded. “Ingrida approached me, yes. She’s... enthralling, that woman. I have to admit, I’m not sure what to make of her yet. When she first reached out to me, she seemed... hesitant. Frightened, almost. A strange sense of recognition held onto her gaze, and she spoke as if she knew me. As if... she had seen me before.”

The younger man withheld his knowledge about Ingrida’s vision, uncertain of how Sigurd would react to it. “Is that so? What did she say?”

“Ingrida referred to me as ‘the one who walked with Tyr.’ She mentioned a wolf similar to Fenrir, and even brought up something about Freya’s collapse. I’m not entirely sure what she meant by those statements, but her wariness was quite plain.”

Eivor shrugged in confusion. “I’m afraid I’m as clueless as you are, but you’ll have to forgive her. Ingrida can be rather paranoid sometimes. Try not to take it personally.”

Sigurd furrowed his brow. “I’m more concerned than I am offended. Even though I’m aware that many people will dismiss seeresses these days, their instincts tend to be accurate. It just makes me wonder what the gods revealed to Ingrida to make her so cautious around me.”

“Well, you are a prince. Trouble has a habit of following royalty even if they don’t intend it.”

Sigurd let out a sigh. “I suppose you’re right.”

The older man suddenly paused, giving his friend a tentative look as another subject crossed his mind. “I-I hope I’m not intruding on your daily routine, by the way. I know you come to this hill for solitude.”

Eivor shook his head, reassuring Sigurd with a welcoming smile. “You’re free to spend as much time here as you please. In fact, I’m happy to run into you again. Figuratively speaking, of course.”

Sigurd laughed. “Likewise.” 

“How did things go with your father, anyway? When you returned to him, I mean.”

The prince waved a dismissive hand. “Ah, about as well as you’d expect. He berated me for being improper and ‘making a fool of myself’ on our first day here. He quickly shooed me away from the feast and told me to find a change of clothes before getting anywhere near Randvi again. Overall though, he wasn’t as harsh as I expected. I think it’s because Arngeir was present.”

Eivor gazed downwards out of guilt. “I hope the king isn’t too angry with me.”

“Have no fear. My father doesn’t even know you were involved. As far as he’s concerned, I spilled that mead on myself. Dag didn’t say anything either.”

The younger man stared at Sigurd in gratitude, admittedly surprised that he would omit his name from their late-night shenanigans.

“That’s... very kind of you. Thank you.”

Sigurd grinned at him, giving him a quick pat on the shoulder. “Well, you can repay me with a round of drinks some other time. For now though, let us simply put it behind us.”

The redheaded man turned his head towards the other end of the village and gazed into the nearby woods, bringing up a rather tempting proposal.

“Hey, Eivor. How would you like to join me for a ride?”

Eivor’s head perked up at that. “A ride? Now?”

Sigurd shrugged innocently. “Why not? My father wants to give our clan a chance to get everything in order before proceeding with this marriage, so I have the day off. I was going to explore the forests around the village on my own, but I’d love to have some company.”

“Where were you thinking of going?”

The prince pointed to a distant landmark. “The waterfall to the north. I caught a glimpse of it while I was at the temple, and I’d like to explore it some more. Care to come along?”

Eivor hesitated with his response, practically having to catch the words in his throat before they could leap out.

It was no question that he would’ve loved to accompany Sigurd on a quick jaunt throughout the woods, but he knew that such an interaction would’ve likely caused his feelings to swell even further. The man’s presence alone was enough to send Eivor into a frenzied state of infatuation, and he didn’t know if it would be wise to indulge in his endearment anymore.

But... he wondered if it would be possible to pursue a platonic relationship with Sigurd. It wouldn’t have been the first time Eivor was forced to stifle his feelings for someone, and it wasn’t as if they had a lot of time to get to know each other anyway.

He might have been interested in the man for now, but Eivor assumed his passion would soon vanish. Their gallivanting would only last for so long before the political troubles of Kjotve’s men rose again, and by then, the young man imagined his mind would’ve drifted onto other subjects already.

At least, that’s what he hoped would happen.

“Alright, Sigurd.” Eivor finally agreed. “I’ll join you.”

The prince smiled joyously. “Wonderful.” He began strolling away from the bench, walking past Eivor as he headed down the hill. “Come. Walk with me to the stables. We’ll take our leave from there.”

The other man followed suit and glanced upwards at Synin, beckoning her to glide along with them.

“I’m ready when you are.”

~~~~~~~~~~

A WHILE LATER

THE OUTSKIRTS OF BJORNHEIMR

Trotting calmly through the forest, Eivor and Sigurd rode alongside each other as they worked their way around the naked trees, leaving Bjornheimr’s noisy activity far behind them.

A multitude of snowflakes gently floated to the glistening ground around them and twinkled sporadically in the air, occasionally catching streaks of light in their icy clutch. Meanwhile, they swayed elegantly in the gale that blew in from beyond the barrier of trees, and adorned any surface that would hold onto them.

As for the wildlife in the woods, they seemed to be making an effort to avoid the pair of intruders traipsing through their home. They stuck to the shadows being cast by the nature surrounding them, and flitted erratically behind the bushes, causing their foliage to twitch with movement.

An orchestra of vibrant chirps could be heard singing throughout the space, and in the delicate rustling that filled the breeze, Eivor detected the sounds of animals yipping collectively, as if conversing with each other about the peculiar visitors wandering through their habitat.

It was a normal day in the woods like any other, and for that, Eivor was grateful.

“The nature you have here is breathtaking,” Sigurd remarked. “The gods were in high spirits when they created Bjornheimr.”

Eivor gazed at the trees lining the path, speaking contently. “They were, weren’t they? Sometimes I forget we’re still in Midgard when I see the beauty they’ve blessed us with.”

“Do you come out here often?”

The young man sighed. “Sadly, no. My duties keep me close to the village these days. Though, I used to spend a lot of time out here with my sister when I was younger. Thora and I would always hunt together in these woods.”

“Ah, yes,” Sigurd said in recognition. “I’ve met Thora as well. Your father introduced us at the feast. She... didn’t seem too fond of me.”

Eivor chuckled. “That’s how she is with everyone. She’s the oldest in our family, so she’s always been protective of me and Randvi. Don’t worry about it. She’ll come to trust you eventually.”

“I hope so. Animosity will provide little for us in times like these.”

Eivor quirked a curious brow at him. “And what of Ulfar? Have you met him yet?”

Sigurd nodded. “I have. He’s a mystery, that one. Hardly said a word to me, and yet, I feel like he spoke the most.”

The blond man paused at the observation. “Is that so? Hm. I knew Ulfar was quiet, but he’s never struck me as the standoffish type. Then again, he and I have known each other for years, so I’ve probably just forgotten how he is with strangers.”

“You two are close?”

“Indeed. Ulfar’s been in my life ever since Arngeir took me in. He was always there to fill the jarl’s absence when the man was occupied with other duties. He’s almost like a second father to me.”

Sigurd posed a question. “Is Ulfar from around here? I noticed a slight accent in his speech when we talked.”

“No,” Eivor explained. “He’s Saxon-born, but was raised by Norse parents after a viking raid destroyed his village.”

“Really? Well, it seems your clan is full of interesting people.”

Eivor snickered softly. “You don’t know the half of it. We have warriors, poets, hunters, thieves... every walk of life lives among us.”

 The prince smirked. “And which one are you?”

“Me? I... can’t say for sure if I’m being honest. I suppose you’ll see for yourself soon enough.”

“A man never knows his own reputation, eh? I can understand that.”

Eivor threw the question back at him. “And what about you? You seemed to know your reputation pretty well when we spoke last night.”

“It’s difficult not to when you’re a prince. Everyone always has an opinion on how you should behave. How you should live. How you should think. Even this marriage wasn’t my idea.”

The other man couldn’t help but notice the hint of frustration in his voice. “It must get tiresome.”

Sigurd let out a defeated sigh. 

“It...” he fell silent for a second, struggling to get his thoughts in order, “...it does, yes. Make no mistake, I appreciate the privileges I have, but sometimes, I wish I didn’t have to live my life for others. I wish... I could just live freely; be my own man.”

He continued his train of thought. “I think that’s why I enjoy spending time with you, Eivor. Everyone else I’ve met so far has expected me to act in a certain way, but... not you. You judge me based on how I am, and not how you think I should be. Sometimes, that’s all I ask of someone.”

Sigurd cut himself off mid-sentence, withdrawing from his statement. “F-Forgive me. I did not mean to be so direct. I just...”

“I understand,” Eivor reassured him. “You bear a lot of weight on your shoulders. It must be difficult, especially in the midst of a war.”

“I suppose I should get used to it. After all, I’m going to be a king someday. It’s not like my situation is getting any easier. Better to come to terms with it now than wrestle with it later.”

Eivor raised a more personal question, admittedly somewhat hesitant to hear his friend’s thoughts.

“...Can I ask you something, Sigurd?”

“Of course.”

He quietened his tone, uncertain of the response he would receive. “Do you feel as though I’m pestering you?”

The prince took a moment to process his words, clearly confused by the sentiment. “Pestering me? No, of course not. I just said I enjoy spending time with you, did I not? Why would I think anything else?”

Eivor’s gaze fell to the ground. “It’s just... I feel like you should be riding through these woods with Randvi instead of me. You came here for her, after all. The whole purpose of your visit is to get closer to your betrothed. I worry that I’m wasting your time.”

Sigurd turned to his friend with a look of concern, quick to come to his defense. “Randvi and I have our entire lives ahead of us, Eivor. These first two weeks are merely the start of our marriage. There will plenty of time for us to get to know each other later. Do not fret. Your company is valued.”

“Well, I’m relieved to hear that. Still, I hope I’m not causing too much of a distraction from your duties. I know you said things have been stressful for the Raven Clan recently.”

“They have, which is why I appreciate you coming along with me. It would unwise for me to ignore my responsibilities, but even the strongest of men need to take a breath occasionally. We have more than enough war waiting for us beyond the horizon. We need not seek it out.”

Eivor found some comfort in his words. “Perhaps you’re right.”

“But enough of that,” Sigurd said, gesturing to the path in front of them. “We’ve reached the waterfall. Come. Let’s take a closer look.”

Tugging on the reins of his horse, Sigurd brought the steed to a steady halt before hopping off of its saddle and landing in the snow, causing his boots to sink through the thick surface.

Meanwhile, Eivor tailed the prince from behind and followed his lead, sticking close to him as the two of them approached the waterfall in the distance.

He recognized this place, despite not having visited it in a while. The locals often referred to this waterfall as the Tears of Ymir due to the strangely humanoid visage in the rock formations surrounding it. It rested on the edge of Bjornheimr’s outskirts and looked out into the open sea, guarding over its vast waters as if the giant himself were gazing upon his creation.

Meanwhile, a roaring cloud of mist clung onto the bottom of the falls’ foundation and merged into the sea below, creating an illusion that made Eivor feel as if he were standing on top of the world.

It was a glorious sight to behold, truly. Many of the landmarks near Bjornheimr were stunning on their own, but the waterfall had always been something else. It watched over the village from a pedestal of rocks and trees, and seemed to pacify the nature around it with a meditative aura. 

It was no wonder that Sigurd found himself drawn to it.

“The landscapes in this region never cease to amaze me,” the prince said in awe, stepping closer to the edge. “I wish I could stay here all day long. It feels so... disconnected from the chaos of our world. So peaceful. It truly is a luxury to have places like this near your home.”

Eivor joined him at the edge, losing himself in the majestic view.

“Indeed. It feels like a sanctuary created by the gods, hidden deep in the woods to protect it from the touch of mankind.”

Sigurd took a seat on the ground and let his legs dangle off the rock, gesturing to the mountains that dominated the horizon.

“You know, when I was a boy... I always used to have dreams about the mountains in this land. I would see a kingdom nestled in the depths of this world, constructed of architecture far beyond our understanding. There was a great tree that stood in the center of it. It was built out of iron and rock, and did not seem capable of breathing life like the ones you see here.”

Eivor sat beside the older man, intrigued by his tale. “A tree made of iron and rock? Can such a thing even exist?”

Sigurd shrugged. “Who knows? The nine realms are an impossible reality. If a tree such as Yggdrasil can exist, what makes an iron tree so implausible?”

The younger man grinned at the thought. “I suppose you’re right.”

The prince leaned back on his arms, relaxing in the snow. “What about you, Eivor? Have you ever had any dreams like that? Seen things that you just... couldn’t explain?”

Eivor nodded. “I have, actually. Ever since I was a child, I always dreamt of the Allfather.”

Sigurd raised a brow. “You’ve seen Odin in your sleep? Are you certain it’s not a vision?”

“It could be,” he conceded, “but nothing in the real world has ever reflected my dreams, so I’m not sure. Ingrida might disagree with me, though. She seems to believe that I carry the gods’ favor.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised,” Sigurd admitted. “After all, they call you the Wolf-Kissed, do they not? For the scar on your neck? Not just anyone can survive an attack like that. Someone was watching over you that day.”

Eivor humored the idea. “You think? I hope that’s the case. Otherwise, I see no reason why my parents had to die while I was able to survive.”

Sigurd’s tone grew gentle with empathy. “...Our world is laden with injustices. The gods must’ve spared you so that you could rectify your own.”

The younger man beamed at him. “Which is where you come in.”

His friend returned the expression with a smile. “My clan will not rest until Kjotve lies rotting in the ground, and our people know peace again. You have my word, Eivor.”

Falling into a profound silence, the two of them simply took the time to enjoy each other’s company as they lounged together on the edge of the cliff, listening to the soothing sound of rushing water barreling down into the space below.

By now, the sun had risen to a point where it appeared as if it was being cradled by the mountains’ peaks, and parted the ocean’s tides with a shimmering streak of light.

As for Sigurd, the man seemed to be in an entirely different world at the moment. His eyes traveled far beyond the corporeal edges of their realm, and his temperament remained unperturbed. His mind had broken free of any troubles that once restrained it, and if Eivor didn’t know any better, he could’ve sworn that the man was subconsciously leaning closer to him.

He just wished he knew what Sigurd was thinking. The man had assured Eivor he wasn’t bothered by his company, but... the younger man wondered if there was anything else lingering in the back of the prince’s mind.

Did he share the same affections that Eivor harbored? Did he feel just as conflicted about everything as his companion? Did he feel drawn to him too? 

There were about a thousand different questions bouncing around Eivor’s thoughts, but he had no idea how to find an answer to any of them. He’d only known Sigurd for less than two days, after all. It wasn’t as if he could broach the subject without raising some level of awkwardness. 

Still, he wished there was some way to crack the shell Sigurd kept around himself. The man didn’t seem disingenuous necessarily, but it was clear that he was hiding his own secrets. It sounded as if his father often scolded him for speaking his mind, and thus, he had become reluctant to talk openly about his concerns. 

It was a shame, really. Eivor’s instincts told him that Sigurd was a man worth talking to, but he appeared to lock his thoughts in a cage that only a select few would be able to access. He had opened up a number of times already, but even then, Eivor found himself curious to learn more.

He just didn’t know how to break the wall between them.

“...Sigurd?” Eivor said timidly, tracing his finger through the snow. “Can I--”

The prince raised a silencing hand, jolting his head to the side in alarm. 

“--Wait.” He whispered. “Did you hear that?”

The blond man glanced around the environment, finding nothing of interest. “...No? What is it?”

Sigurd propped himself up from the ground and gripped the hilt of his sword, attentively scanning the woods for any movement.

“I thought I heard someone else talking,” he explained in a hushed tone. “It sounded like they were hiding in the woods.”

Eivor followed his line of sight and glared at the wall of trees standing behind them, steadily reaching for his axe as his gaze pierced through the shadows.

“Is someone there?” Sigurd called, returning to his feet. “Come out where we can see you. There’s no use in cowering.”

The two of them waited for a response, remaining completely still.

Leaping out from the nest of trees, a lone arrow suddenly flew towards Eivor and soared straight past his neck, planting itself in the ground behind him. 

Meanwhile, a series of footsteps shuffled around in the woods for a bit, and before they knew it, a pair of men had emerged from the darkness with swords in their hands, intent on slaying anything that moved.

“Shit...!” Eivor exclaimed, instantly recognizing their attire. “Kjotve’s men!”

Pouncing into battle, Sigurd and Eivor wasted no time in fending off the ambush and immediately started swinging their weapons about, clashing with the blades of their attackers.

Eivor swerved to the left in order to dodge another oncoming arrow and confronted one of the assailants on his own, leaving his companion to deal with the other. He deflected their blow with a quick bash of his axe, and swiftly ducked under a second swing before hurling his weapon into their gullet.

A stream of blood came squirting out from their throat following the counterattack, and within the blink of an eye, the man had fallen limp, gripping his neck to preserve a life that was no longer there.

As for the other man, he was still tangled in a fight with Sigurd and currently trying to plow through the prince’s adamant defenses, relentlessly delivering one blow after another. The redheaded man seemed to be holding up alright against the brute’s wild swings, but was clearly struggling to find an opening.

“Sigurd!” Eivor shouted over the commotion, sprinting towards him. “Hold on!”

Diving directly into the midst of the pandemonium, Eivor made a beeline for the gargantuan warrior and frantically searched for a weak point in his armor, raising his axe in preparation. 

Before he was able to provide any aid for Sigurd however, the man flicked his eyes in Eivor’s direction and slammed his sword downwards in a vertical slice, carving his blade straight through the smaller man’s cheekbone.

Eivor was sent flying backwards due to the incredible impact and landed harshly in the snow with a heavy thud, causing his weapon to slip from his grasp. Meanwhile, Sigurd finally found the opening he needed and promptly took advantage of it, immediately turning the tide of the battle.

He heaved his longsword in the air with a fatigued grunt and lined it up with the warrior’s head, practically dropping the blade into their skull while their attention was focused on Eivor.

The man’s limbs twitched sporadically once the weapon made contact with his scalp, and after a few moments of struggling to process what just happened, he collapsed to his knees, toppling over right next to where Eivor lay.

Sigurd let out a labored breath following the end of the fight, quickly switching back into a state of panic once he saw what had become of his friend.

“Eivor!” He blurted out, rushing to the man. He crouched down and cradled Eivor’s head in his hold, checking to see if he was still breathing.

“Eivor,” Sigurd repeated worriedly, shaking him slightly. “Are you still with me?”

The younger man forced his eyes open to a slit upon hearing the prince’s pleas and grinned, wincing at the immediate pain that stung his cheek.

“Oh, relax, your highness...” Eivor teased cordially, his voice straining with effort. “It’s... it’s nothing to worry about...”

Sigurd sighed in relief, his breath turning into mist once it departed from his lips. “By Odin’s beard... I feared he might’ve killed you for a moment there.”

“I’ve hurt myself worse trying to navigate the village after waking up from a drunken stupor. I’ll... be alright.”

The older man wasn’t ready to calm down just yet. “Well, I’m not willing to let my guard down until we get you back to Bjornheimr. There could be more people hiding in the woods.” Sigurd shook his head in anger. “Dammit...! Where did they come from? Do you think these men were scouts?”

Eivor brought himself to a sitting position, relying on Sigurd’s support to elevate himself.

“...P-Possibly, or they could be stragglers. Either way... we need to return to the village and let the jarl know what’s going on. I... I imagine your father will want to hear of this too.”

“First, let’s focus on tending to your wound,” the prince reminded him. “We should bring you to the seeress as soon as possible. It looks like the blade cut you pretty deep.”

Eivor held onto Sigurd’s arm, pulling himself back up to his feet. “Well, whatever we do... we need to get out of these woods. Idling out here isn’t going to do us any favors.”

“Agreed.”

The older man whistled for his horse, offering Eivor a helping hand once he noticed that his steed had fled.

“Come,” he instructed. “I’ll take you back to the village. We shouldn’t waste another minute in this forest.”

Eivor followed Sigurd’s actions, growing increasingly sluggish with every step he took. “...Thank you, Sigurd. I’m glad I had you by my side today.”

The prince climbed onto his mount and took hold of the reins, allowing Eivor to take a seat as the other man wrapped his arms around his waist.

“No. Thank you, Eivor. I’d be dead if it weren’t for you.” Sigurd diverted his focus to the journey ahead of them, comforting his friend with some final words. The man may have pretended that he wasn’t affected, but Sigurd could tell that Eivor’s wound was draining his energy by the second.

“Hush now, drengr,” he soothed in a gentle voice. “Save your strength. I’ll take you back to Bjornheimr. Just rest now. You’ll be alright.”

[otonymous]

A Bolt From The Blue (MLQC Shaw - NSFW) - Part III: Near & Far

Description: Promising beginnings and a premature end throw you into a tailspin Warnings: NSFW/18+: Explicit/graphic language & mature themes — reader discretion is advised.  Potential trigger warnings: depictions of mild PTSD symptoms, mentions of death of a close family member, disappearances, “breakups,” angst, profanity Word Count: 1882 words (~9 mins of falling in love and wallowing in angst 😱😂) Author’s Notes: If you’re still following this story, please accept a giant (virtual) hug from me to you!  Thank you very much from the bottom of my heart for supporting me and this piece of work! 💖 Without further ado, I present to you part 3 of my slow-burn Shaw fic, written for the lovely @op-peccatori​ as part of my follower milestone celebration.

As always, dear reader, please note the potential trigger warnings listed above, and happy reading! 😊

Jump to Chapter(s): One | Two | Four

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“You can relax, you know.  I won’t try anything funny while you sleep, not my style.  Besides, isn’t this much better than camping out on the floor?”

Nodding your head before you realize that Shaw probably couldn’t see you in the dark, your “Yes” comes out in a mewl so pathetic you wished you could immediately take it back.

His snicker shakes the bed, reverberating across squeaky springs to where you lay beside him, right at the edge of the twin mattress as you tried not to let your hands touch.

No matter how much you wished for them to.

Beyond the window, a neon signboard paints electric shadows on your walls in splashes of pink, flashing in time to a rhythm Shaw tapped out with one foot beneath the covers.

“Is it cool if…if we didn’t draw the blinds tonight?  I can’t sleep in complete darkness.” He had asked you earlier that evening, towelling off his hair as he emerged from your bathroom wearing a shirt your ex had left behind along with your broken heart a year and a half ago.

Snoopy looked much better riding his skateboard across Shaw’s broad chest anyways.

And there, in the midst of an awkward arrangement where sleep would surely prove fleeting, the sounds of the night: the low hum of the refrigerator, the pawn shop’s sign buzzing just on the other side of the windowpane…the tick-tock of the clock on the wall, steady like Shaw’s breath beside you as it counts down precious time—

“I’ll be out of your hair first thing tomorrow morning.”  

Ba-bump.

“No, there’s…there’s no rush.  Honestly.”

“Can you really afford to miss more work because of me?”

Silence.  You couldn’t refute the truth.

“Tell you what, in exchange for putting up with me, you can ask me anything you want.  I’ve seen the way you look at me sometimes; surely you must be curious about some things.  Might as well find out before I go.”

Your stomach knotted, clenching tight.  He was right.  For all you know, it was now or never.  “Why did you join?  The triad, that is.”

He is silent for a moment, as if trying to find the right words to piece together.

“I’m looking for my brother.”

Out of all possible answers, this wasn’t one you were expecting.  Turning onto your side, you study the handsome profile of his face — watching as pink mixed with lavender in the most ethereal way until you were overcome with the sense that in this vast ocean of life, you and him stood on very different shores.  Eyes still fixed on your ceiling, Shaw continues.

“He was an undercover cop, working to infiltrate the ranks of the group I’m currently a part of.  I only found out by accident, and he made me swear up and down not to breathe a word of it to mom.  Then one day…he was gone.  Just...disappeared off the face of the earth.  Mom and I went down to the station every day for months, knew the names and faces of everyone who worked in that building, but it was like Gavin never even existed.

“It was too much for her.  I came home late from school one day — found her on the floor, barely breathing.  It was dark in the apartment…so dark.  She had probably just drawn the curtains.  By the time the paramedics arrived, she was already gone.  Heart attack, they said.  

“I lie awake at night sometimes, wonder how I’m going to tell him that mom’s no longer here — go through the motions in my head, rehearsing every line.  ‘Cus I know that sooner or later, that day will come.  There’s no way he’s dead.  I know my brother.”

A glimmer at the corner of his eye catches yours.  Beneath the covers, your fingers inch towards his, finding courage in the darkness to brush against his pinky as if the sliver of warmth could express what words simply couldn’t convey.

“With mom gone, there was nothing to lose.  I joined the group, worked hard…did what they needed me to do to gain their trust, all while collecting scraps of info here and there — whatever I could get my hands on in the hopes that it’ll lead me to Gav.”

Pitter-patter, pitter-patter.

Tiny drops of rain speckle your windowpane.  And when Shaw’s finger hooks around yours as if in a solemn pinky swear, the tears burning your eyes finally fall.  You don’t ask him how many years it’s been, the dirty deeds he’s had to sully his hands with.  You don’t question him about the father he doesn’t mention.  All you can do is watch as a solitary drop rolls down the side of his face before soaking into lavender strands fanned out on the pillow, the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows back bitterness only he knew.

In spite of it all, he is the one who chuckles when he turns towards you, eyes red rimmed even as his brows rise in feigned exasperation when he says, “Why are you crying?!  I’m the one with the tragic past here!”

And when you start to cry even harder, his soft hushes of “Shh, shh…I’m sorry, that last part was a joke.  It’s all right, everything will be okay, I promise,” burrows deep into your heart and you believe him.

Because when he reaches towards you — the thumb wiping the tears from your eyes calloused yet gentle — you are struck by a sense of overwhelming tenderness:

In the carefulness of his touch.

In the way he regards you with the sincerity of some unspoken emotion.

In the entirety of this man whom the rest of the world has already written off.

And that is when you know…

“I didn’t mean to make you cry by telling you all this, I’m sorry.”

…that you are in love with him.

“I’ll make it up to you.  Ask me another question.  Maybe something less depressing this time.”  

A smile spreads across his face.  You wished there was a way for you to keep the warmth of his hand on your cheek forever.  Sniffling, you try again.

“Wh-why did you keep coming in to my store everyday?  There’s a lot of other convenience stores in the area—”

A flash of panic in those amber eyes, and Shaw is turning over with lightning speed until all you can see is the smooth expanse of his back.

“Changed my mind.  A guy’s gotta keep some secrets!  Goodnight!”

���You’re a good girl, aren’t you?”

Wrap your arms around the pillow.

“Good girls shouldn’t concern themselves with bad boys.”

Bury your face into its cushiony fill.

“Or have you forgotten that I’m wanted by the police?”

And inhale deeply.

Shaw’s scent on your sheets is faint now, so much so that you can’t be entirely sure you’re not imagining it, having gone through this ritual countless times since the day Shaw left your apartment…

…and stepped out of your life.

                   *                                         *                                          *

“Is there…any way I could stay in touch with you?  I-I just…just want to make sure you’re okay…”

Voice trailing off, you watch as Shaw gingerly shrugs one arm then another through the sleeves of his leather jacket, still wearing the Snoopy t-shirt he had slept in the night before after you told him he could keep it.  His own was torn beyond repair, stubbornly dyed in blood regardless of how much you scrubbed at it.  And when he hesitated still, you said he would just be doing you the favour of taking out the trash.  

Smoothing down the front of his jacket, Shaw glances at the phone in your hands — eyes tracing along your eager fingers, poised to type.  The expression on his face is unreadable, as if the man you had spent the night sharing secrets with was nothing more than a figment of your imagination.

“It’s better if we don’t.  I’ll be fine, just laying low for the next while — boss’s orders.  And I don’t want the cops coming around to your place again.  Detective Whatshisname looks like he could be really good at hounding pretty girls like you.”

That smirk again, so familiar to you by now.  And in the compliment that would’ve made you blush bright red before, nothing but a smokescreen.

“Shaw, I don’t mind—”

“You’re a good girl, aren’t you?" The force in his voice cuts, and you barely breathe to feel his finger curl beneath your chin, tilting up your face until you have no choice but to meet his gaze.  Those eyes are dull, like molten gold frozen beneath a layer of impenetrable ice.  “Good girls shouldn’t concern themselves with bad boys.  Or have you forgotten that I’m wanted by the police?”

The shiver that runs electric down your spine makes the hairs on your skin stand on end.  It was like looking at a stranger.  Heart racing, your palms grow clammy with sweat, unsure of exactly when your phone had dropped from your hands, slipping away like…

“I don’t care about the cops!  I’ll deal with them—”

“DEAL WITH WHAT?!  You think that just because you managed to turn them away at the door that it makes you a hardened criminal?!  WE are not the same, okay?  My life is worthless.  I’ve already signed it away a long time ago, I’m ready to give it up without a second thought.  But you…you’re different. Y-you’re kind, innocent.  You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.  One day, you’ll make someone the luckiest person in the world, be a beautiful mother to beautiful children.  Don’t sell yourself short…not for someone like me.”

The silence that descends is thick, suffocating.  You don’t speak, afraid to open your mouth because it takes all your concentration just to keep the tears from spilling from your eyes.

Finally letting go of your chin, Shaw reaches behind his neck to undo the clasp on the thin gold chain he wore, the jade disc pendant that hung from it still warm from the heat of his skin when he places it in the palm of your hand.

“It’s not much, but it was a gift from my mom and the most valuable thing I own.  You saved my life, so it’s yours now.  Maybe…maybe one day, you can give it to your own child.”

Lump in your throat, you can barely breathe, let alone tell him there was no way you could accept something that precious, something that priceless.  That you didn’t drag him home that night, broken and bleeding, in the hopes of gain; not for money, not for love.

He curls your fingers around the heirloom, gentle thumb pressing on index, middle, ring then pinky in turn before your fist finds itself held tightly within the press of his much larger hand for one…two…three seconds…

…before those purple Chuck Taylors take him to your door…

Slam.

…and just like that, the man with the lavender hair is gone.

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Forgive me for trolling, but there really was only one bed LOL!  Hope you all enjoyed the latest chapter, and please stay tuned for what may be the final instalment in this Shaw saga! - XOXO

Jump to Chapter(s): One | Two | Four

Thanks so much for reading! 💕 Check out more of my work here! 📚(Please do not repost/copy/alter my work.  Reblogs, on the other hand, are a-ok and much appreciated! 👍🏼💖)

[bunwritesstuff]

Creepy Crawlies

hello !! this is my first official writing piece for this blog :0 exciting. this is kinda like a test piece to see how i feel posting on here, but i hope yall read it and enjoy either way! fic is under the banner :]

fandom: omori

word count: 1,317

content warning(s): brief mentions of a bug, nothing graphic

characters included: mari, sunny, and aubrey (kel and hero are mentioned but not present)

synopsis: mari, sunny and aubrey are walking to school, and sunny gets distracted by a bug. it gives mari a silly little idea. (small spoiler ->) this is a fic based off when mari admits that she used to put bugs in hero's desk! this is just the first part, i might publish the second part in a post after this !! also i got like halfway through writing this and realized basil is just not there, so say this takes place during a time before basil was properly introduced to the group :]

“Sunny, be careful! You shouldn't touch an icky thing like that!”

Mari was torn from her thoughts at the sound of Aubrey’s distressed squeals a few feet ahead. Pulling her attention to her brother and their friend, Mari noted how Sunny was crouched to the ground, facing her. He must’ve turned back around to get a better look at whatever caught his attention. His expression was drawn into one of interest, mouth slightly agape and eyes widened in awe. There, almost directly under his gaze, was a bug. That's what Mari assumed anyways, it was hard to tell given how far away he and Aubrey were. Aubrey was standing even further back, nose scrunched up in disgust with hands balled into small fists at her sides. It was almost like she was ready for the bug to lunge at Sunny, that way she’d have an excuse to stomp on it. Or something to that degree, anyways.

The older girl quickened her pace a bit to catch up with the kids. Hero and Kel would have normally been walking with them, but when Mari and Sunny showed up at their house to get them, Hero had to inform them that Kel was having stomach issues. He reassured them that they'd catch up later, and that he was going to try and talk his parents into letting Kel just stay home for today. Hero didn't want to risk making everyone late by having them all wait, so he ushered them off. Today it was just Mari, Sunny, and Aubrey. 

It didn’t take long for Mari to slow down in front of Sunny and his newfound fascination, which was in fact, a bug: a beetle of some kind, walking around in almost dizzying circles. It was pretty amusing how interested Sunny was in the creature, as if bugs like this weren’t fairly common. Sunny wasn't a very expressive kid, so moments where he managed to convey clearly how he was feeling were wonderful, whether it was intentional or not.

“Is everything okay?” Mari asked, her tone gentle as she brought her gaze up from Sunny and the beetle to the shorter girl in pink.

“It… it's so big and ugly! Sunny’s sitting so close to it, what if it bites him or something? He could get hurt!” Aubrey immediately expressed, bouncing on her toes to get some of her concerned and worked up energy out. The brunette was never one to really hold back how she was feeling, it was honestly pretty admirable of her to be able to get it all out. Then again, It would be pretty easy to envy an elementary schooler for their lack of filter, wouldn’t it? 

“You make some very compelling points, Aubrey,” Mari started, shooting the younger a soft smile as she knelt down across from Sunny. “However, I don’t think this bug is very big, ugly, or aggressive. If it was an aggressive bug, surely it would’ve tried to attack us by now, don’t you think?”

The silence that followed was enough to answer that question.

“While you may think this bug is big and scary, could you imagine being this little guy? We must be even bigger, louder creatures.”

“Well, yeah! But…”

“But?”

“I…” Aubrey brought her bouncing to a slow stop as she took in Mari’s words. With some hesitance, she took a few steps forward, peeking over Sunny’s shoulder to get a better look at the beetle. Just as Mari said, it was much smaller than she initially made it out to be, and it hadn’t made any moves to attack. It was just a little guy taking a buggy stroll. Aubrey felt her fists begin to unclench as she relaxed, and eventually let out a quiet sigh. “I guess it isn’t so bad… it’s kinda cute, actually.” 

The other girls in her class would’ve screamed and made a fuss like she did, so she wondered why Mari didn’t react that way. Mari always knew just the right things to say, always so calm and collected. It was something Aubrey really liked about her. With her and Sunny both more curious about the bug rather than fearing it, it helped sway Aubrey’s opinion on it to be a more positive one. From the corner of her eye, she saw Mari starting to stand up, brushing off her skirt.

“I agree! It is pretty cute. But if this is settled, what do you say we finish making our way to school, okay? If you guys make it in time, you might be able to have a few minutes of free time before class starts.”

At the idea of having some extra free time, Aubrey perked back up and nodded eagerly. “Okay, Mari!” Leaning down a little, she put her hand on Sunny’s shoulder to get his attention. “C’mon, Sunny! We’ve gotta get going!”

It took a moment, but Sunny quietly stood up at the second reminder. He took one last moment to watch the beetle before stepping back from it and looked up at Mari and Aubrey. Aubrey took her hand off of his shoulder and instead reached down to take his hand, hoping he didn’t mind. He didn't offer much of a reaction, so she decided she was in the clear. “C’mon!” She giggled again, turning around and starting to pull him along with her down the sidewalk. 

“Don’t go too far ahead without me,” Mari reminded the kids as they started to wander off, but the request fell upon ears that were not listening anymore. Ah, well… at least she could still see them. Not that Mari didn’t trust them, Aubrey knew better than to go too far, and if Sunny felt unsafe he’d turn around and come back to Mari. Everything would be okay. Despite this, Mari still wished that Hero were here. He always knew how to keep everyone in the group together. He could get through to Aubrey in a way that not even Mari seemed to be able to, even if he doubted that he could.

Mari adjusted the straps of her backpack and was about to start walking again when that silly beetle caught her attention once again. With Hero on her mind, she was reminded of how bugs made him squeamish. If he and Kel were here, and the group got sidetracked by this beetle, Hero would be quite a ways ahead of the group, not wanting to give the little guy a second glance. The association bridging this bug to Hero did leave Mari to wonder: would it be mean to play a small, harmless prank on him?

Was it cruel of her to even consider pulling a prank on her friend? To lean back down, quickly scoop up the beetle, and tuck it away in her sweatshirt pocket? Was it cruel that she was kind of looking forward to Hero’s expression going from confusion, to processing, to fear all within the same moment? Well, maybe it was! He didn’t have to know it was her who did it, after all. It’ll just be her little secret. She wouldn’t do it every day, that’d be too sudden and suspicious! But every now and then wouldn’t hurt, right? 

His fear of bugs was understandable, but surely he’d grow out of it eventually. They were already in middle school after all! Most kids grew out of their bug fearing phase by then, didn't they? Mari decided that having to face an occasional bug would help him overcome his fear… right? Well, she wasn’t sure it would definitely work, but until it either worked or she got bored of doing it, his reactions would surely be priceless.

With that in mind, and her hand still in her pocket to keep the beetle from escaping, she hurried along to try and catch up with Aubrey and Sunny. This morning would surely be an interesting one.

part 1/2 (end)

[moonknightly]

Mistakes and Sour Grapes : Modern!Poe Dameron x Reader (One)

Pairing: Poe Dameron x Reader

Word Count: 2.4k

Excerpt: “You were totally fucking staring, and he totally fucking caught you, and wait, maybe he was staring back and had his cheeks been pink the whole time?”

Warnings: Alcohol, some cursing, future parts are gonna be slutty. 

I am extremelyyyyy unsure about this so if it’s a thing you guys are into, please, please let me know. 

[SERIES MASTERLIST]

Bars weren’t really your thing.

Especially in a city that was typically known to be overrun with tourists at any given time of year.

They were crowded and loud, and you usually weren’t the biggest fan of the style of music blaring through nearly shot speakers, and you definitely weren’t a fan of the headache you’d often suffer with afterwards from the absurd amount of bass they deemed necessary. They smelled bad, they were dark and dingy and gross, and many patrons were less than respectful and showed little regard after knocking back a few drinks.

It really wasn’t your thing.

But you had a friend who worked as a bartender at a small brewery and local restaurant, and that was definitely more your speed, and honestly the only time you did end up sitting at a bar. Most Friday and Saturday nights, you found yourself practically drooling over a plate of delicious food and, depending on your mood, either a beer or a cocktail while making smalltalk with Finn as he worked. And most of the time, you’d end up the last customer in the building, staying late to help Finn put away glasses or wipe down the counter, partially so he could get out of there faster, but mainly because you just enjoyed spending your time there.

It was one of those nights now, where you were behind the bar, a rag in your hand as you wiped water droplets from still warm tumblers while Finn worked on the wine glasses.

“I’m telling you,” Finn said from behind you. “You’d make more money bartending here.”

You sighed, rolling your eyes playfully as you peeked over your shoulder towards him.

“I have a job,” you reminded him for the hundredth time in the last ten days. Ever since another bartender had put in their two weeks, he had been trying to convince you to put in an application.

“Yeah, a shitty one. Come on, I could move out to the beer garden, you could take over in here. It would be absolutely perfect.”

You laughed, shaking your head almost teasingly. “Perfect for your schedule maybe.”

“And for yours! Look, you hate waking up early. If you worked here, you could sleep in until noon if you wanted. And we’d be coworkers. What more could you ask for in a job?”

You rolled your eyes again, turning back to the look at the tumbler in your hand, falling back into a comfortable silence.

One that didn’t last long by any means, for Finn was apparently damned and determined.

“I mean technically, you’re already working. Might as well get paid to do it.”

“Putting away glasses is hardly working.”

“You’d get tips nightly instead of having to wait every other week for a paycheck. And did I mention you’d make more?”

“Might make more, but it’s not consistent.”

“You like the vibe up here. You like the building.”

Now there was a point that you would actually consider.

You did like the vibe.

It was laid back, relaxed while still being a more refined atmosphere. Most people who sat at the bar were corporate workers or couples, just looking to have a drink and a good meal after a long day, and the other restaurant goers were typically families.

The building itself was just a year away from turning two hundred years old, and the history behind it intrigued you to no end, including the fact that it was said to be the most haunted building in the city. That was something you were entirely into.

You hesitated, tilting your head to the side and gnawing on your bottom lip.

“Maybe.”

“Maybe?”

“Maybe.”

His response came in the form of a bar towel snapping through the air and hitting the back of your thigh, and you yelped before dissolving into a fit of laughter, thankfully having just set the last tumbler in its place. You were pretty sure you would have dropped it had it still been in your hands.

Finn hung the last wine glass just after — his last task for the night, and you were ready to make your escape, but before you could even push back from the counter he was reaching around you for two of the tumblers you had just put away.

“Okay, we’ve gotta take a shot to celebrate, and we’re makin’ it a double.”

You laughed again, the sound completely exasperated yet so amused at the same time. “Finn, I didn’t say yes. And even if I put in an application, I’m not guaranteed to get it.”

“Oh you’re gettin’ it alright,” he snorted, shaking his head. “I’ll beg if I have to. Now what are we having?”

“You’re still on the clock.”

He narrowed his eyes playfully, whipping his head around dramatically, quite literally spinning in place, arms open wide as he gestured to the empty restaurant. “And who the hell is going to care? I’ll just put it on your tab.”

A third laugh, and a reason Finn was your best friend. He could always make you fucking laugh. You raised your hands in mock surrender.

“Now what are we having?” he repeated his prior question, quirking an eyebrow.

You thought about it for a moment, drumming your fingers along the countertop, lips pursed. “Chocolate cake shots.”

“Excuse me, what?”

“What kind of bartender are you?”

“A shitty one apparently,” he scoffed, his eyebrow raising just a fraction higher. “Now explain.”

You rolled your eyes. “It’s one part vodka, one part Frangelico, and-”

“-and a sugared lemon on a sugared rim.”

You jumped, and Finn nearly dropped the glasses as a new voice echoed throughout the room, but you watched as he quickly relaxed, a look of recognition crossing over his face.

He turned slowly, the action conveying mock annoyance, and you peeked around him, glancing towards where the voice had come from.

A man with short salt and pepper curls and tanned skin was walking down the staircase, his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans and a smug smirk tugging at his lips. A noise caught in your throat, one you wouldn’t have even been able to begin to describe, and Finn managed to catch it, glancing back towards you for just a brief second before turning his attention back to the man approaching.

The undeniably handsome, gorgeous, breathtaking man in an olive green hoodie with the sleeves pushed up mid-forearm, a good two day’s worth of stubble covering his jaw. A small scar on his cheek. Big brown eyes.

Were you staring? Fuck, you were totally staring.

You were totally fucking staring, and he totally fucking caught you, and wait, maybe he was staring back and had his cheeks been pink the whole time?

“Of course you’re still here. Do you ever leave or did you convert one of the rooms upstairs into an apartment?”

“There’s an idea,” the man chuckled, tearing his gaze away from you, and you felt a small amount of air flood back into your lungs.

You were still staring though, blatantly so, and you couldn’t even find the shame to stop yourself. You watched as his eyes fluttered back over to you, quickly, for a mere second before he eyed the tumblers in Finn’s hand, quirking an eyebrow.

“She wanted to buy me a drink and it would’ve been rude to turn a customer down,” Finn deadpanned, and you couldn’t help but snort.

The man shrugged, leaning against the counter opposite of you. “Make it three.”

“Yes sir.”

Finn grabbed a third glass after setting the first two down, not taking his eyes off of what he was doing as he nodded towards you, saying your name.

“This is Poe Dameron, the owner. Dameron, you are now in the presence of my best friend in the entire galaxy.”

He repeated your name, and Poe smiled, pushing off the counter and extending a hand out to you.

“S’nice to meet you.”

You nodded, your cheeks suddenly feeling a touch warmer than they had been before as you took his hand in yours, shaking it firmly. “You too.”

He smiled again, nodding his head, holding onto you for just a second longer than what would be considered customary before letting go. He stayed next to you though, folding his arms across his chest as he glanced towards Finn again.

“Now, why are we taking shots?”

“Because she’s,” Finn said, pointing a finger towards you, “applying for the open bartender position.”

Poe raised an eyebrow, turning his attention towards you. “Is that right?”

Your blush only intensified as you noticed those big brown eyes of his flutter quickly over your body, just once, for just a split second. You nodded.

“Have you ever bartended before?”

“Not really,” you admitted, just a hint of a nervous edge in your voice.

Poe shrugged. “Fast learner?”

You nodded again, and Finn spoke before you had a chance to.

“And she apparently already knows more than I freakin’ do. Chocolate cake shots, what the hell?”

“Trust me,” you said, a small chuckle following.

Poe smirked again. “It tastes exactly how it sounds.”

Finn shook his head, adding the sugared lemons to the finished drinks before passing them out.

“You gotta hold the lemon juice in your mouth while you take the shot though,” you added, already taking the wedge off the rim.

Poe nodded, following your actions. “If you don’t, you’ll ruin it.”

You and Poe took your shots first, Finn watching before throwing back his own, his eyes widening in surprise as the liquid ran down his throat.

“Holy shit, you weren’t lying.”

“Have I ever led you wrong?” you laughed, wiping at a stray drop of vodka and Frangelico that ran down your chin.

You could feel Poe staring at you as you did so, and you chose to ignore it, and this time, you attributed the blush on your cheeks to the alcohol slowly moving through your veins.

You reached for Poe’s glass, grabbing Finn’s as well before moving to clean them, just as an excuse to put a little distance between you and Poe. You heard the two of them quietly talking, about what, you didn’t know, couldn’t hear over the running water, and only when the glasses were clean and back in their place did you tune back in.

“Where’s Bee?”

Poe shrugged. “She’s around here somewhere.”

“Who’s Bee?” you asked, tilting your head to the side, looking between the two men in front of you.

“His lady,” Finn chuckled, his answer earning him a sharp jab to the ribs and a small snort from Poe.

Oh, so he was taken?

Figures. A man so beautiful certainly had a woman just as gorgeous on his arm.

Before you had a chance to say anything further, Poe whistled, the sound loud and echoing off the walls, and you jumped for the second time that night. Just ten seconds later, the clattering of nails across hardwood could be heard throughout the restaurant, and a big, white German Shepherd came bounding around the corner of the bar, practically jumping into her owner’s arms.

“Oh hello there sweet girl, were you taking a nap downstairs again?” Poe cooed, scratching the large dog behind her ears.

Bee whined affectionately, her tail wagging erratically. You flushed, laughing at yourself just a little bit for how your mood had taken a hit at the idea of him being taken. You had known him for less than ten minutes.

You watched the two interact for a few seconds, your arms folded loosely over your chest.

“You can pet her if you’d like.”

“Oh how could I ever turn down such an offer?”

You immediately knelt onto the ground, ready and eager to be attacked by the big floof of white fur, but Bee didn’t turn her attention away from her owner, causing you to over exaggerate a pout and Poe to laugh.

“Bee, you’re not working right now sweetheart.”

You looked up at him, tilting your head to the side just a fraction. “Working?”

“Service dog,” Poe shrugged, a mannerism you were quickly learning was signature. “Even when she’s not wearing her vest she likes to think she’s on call.”

You stayed quiet for a couple of seconds, knowing not to pry but also not knowing exactly how to respond.

“She seems to be good at her job,” you settled on finally.

Poe chuckled quietly, nodding his head, not offering up an explanation himself, but that was to be expected. You were still mere strangers.

“Go say hi.”

Bee nuzzled her nose into Poe’s chest before dropping back down onto all fours, finally turning her attention to you. She ignored your outstretched hand, immediately going for your face, licking your cheek and pawing at your thighs. You giggled, stroking the dog down her back, scratching every now and again.

“I think I might steal her,” you teased, wiggling your eyebrows as you glanced up.

Poe only laughed, and you spent several minutes merely petting and playing with Bee behind the bar, giving Poe the opportunity to sneak back upstairs and grab her vest — an orange one with the words “service dog” printed onto the side.

“What’s your schedule like next week?” he asked, giving a short whistle after that immediately made Bee pull away from you, sitting patiently as she waited for her owner to slip her vest on.

You shrugged. “I work in the mornings but otherwise I’m free.”

“Ew, mornings,” Poe mumbled, scrunching up his nose before shaking his head. “Think you can come by Monday night so Finn can start training you?”

Finn let out an excited yelp, and you could only blink.

“Wait, like, train as in...I have the job? Just like that?”

“If you don’t burn the place down Monday night and you enjoy yourself, then yeah,” Poe chuckled. “It’s yours.”

You bit your lip, and you wouldn’t have been able to hide your smile regardless of how hard you tried.

“I’m down, Dameron.”

He smiled right back, holding out his hand for you to shake while also simultaneously pulling you off the floor, and you would’ve crashed into your chest had you not braced yourself against the counter with your free hand.

“Welcome aboard.”

[eleanorbloom]

When You’re Ready Ch. 17

Pairing: Bryce Lahela x f! MC (Eleanor Bloom) x Ethan Ramsey.

Word Count: 6.6k  (Am I sorry? Absolutely not.)

Warnings: Angst and cussing.

Taglist @utterlyinevitable​ @binny1985​ @shanzay44​ @choicesficwriterscreations​ @laiba-the-person​ @starrystarrytrouble​ @lahellacute​ @lucy-268​  @cinnamonspongecake​ @romewritingshop​ @bratzlahela​ @mrs-raleighcarrera​​   @mercury84choices​  @curiousconch​

Chapter 17: Truly, Madly, Deeply.

I'll love you more with every breath Truly, madly, deeply do I will be strong I will be faithful 'Cause I'm counting on A new beginning A reason for living A deeper meaning, yeah

 “I’m an asshole.”

Aurora stared at Bryce leaning against the wall with his face buried in his forearm and his shoulders slumped. Defeated. Ashamed. Mortified.

“Bryce, if I told you this is not to make you feel worse than you already feel, it’s because you had understandable reasons to be mad. This whole situation between Eleanor and Ethan is… complicated and adding the information Elijah gave it to you only made things worse.”

Bryce stood straight and faced his friend, his eyes glistening.

“Understandable reasons. Thinking that Eleanor slept with Ramsey and she would dump me it’s an understandable reason to ignore her even if she had never given me any reasons to distrust her? I think not. It’s awful.”

His voice was full of regret and desperation, and even if seeing Bryce like that was painful for her, she didn’t regret her decision.

“You got caught in a misunderstanding. I bet you thought the worst because you’re afraid and that’s understandable. Now you know the truth and you can move on.”

“Move on?—He turned around and started pacing around the hallway trying to contain his anger.—"How can I move on if I know the last three days could’ve been so much different and I…”

“Bryce, stop there.”—Aurora snapped, serious. —"You have to stop wallowing in what-ifs and should’ves right now, because is not going to lead you anywhere, and is not going to help Eleanor either. She needs you. You’re the person she needs the most now, so you have to be in your best shape and mood to help her. Your feelings are important, but right now you have to focus on her.”

Bryce stopped in the middle of the hallway and sighed loudly, then he nodded and looked up at Aurora.

“You’re right. I’m sorry. I’m not usually like this, I don’t lose control this easily, it’s just…”

It’s just that he couldn’t imagine a life without Eleanor, and he couldn't live with the fact that he could've held her, and kiss her, and love her the last three days but he didn't because he was blind and scared.

His breath started raging and he winced, trying to contain the emotions that were overwhelming him. The idea of losing her was becoming more palpable than ever.

“It’s okay, Bryce. You love her, she’s your girlfriend, I’d be more worried if you hadn’t lost your shit by now. Come here.”

Aurora pulled him into a hug, and he wrapped her instantly as if holding her was like clinging to the last drop of sanity he had left.

Guilt had always been his weak spot. He learned it when he left Keiki in Maui and never came back, and to this day he was still dealing with the consequences and trying to make up for the lost time.  

And now he was dealing with another kind of guilt, and facing death was making everything worse. The effects were instant, devastating, and maddening.

After a minute of herculean effort to not crying his soul out, Bryce pulled away from Aurora, feeling more serene and like a lot of weight had been taken off his shoulders.  

“Thank you, Aurora.”—He muttered, staring deeply at her chocolate eyes, trying to convey his feelings.— “You’re an amazing friend.”

If it wasn’t for her, Bryce would’ve drowned in guilt, shame, and self-loathing to a depth so dangerous, it would've taken an impossible effort to come afloat by himself.

Aurora smiled at him and shook him by the shoulders.

“Anytime you need, I’ll be there for you. You’re not alone.”

“Likewise.”

“Dr. Lahela?”

Bryce turned around and found a nurse a few feet away, looking at them cautiously, almost sorry for interrupting the intimate moment.  

“Yes, Marlene?”

“I’ve been trying to contact Eleanor’s family for a couple of hours, but no success. Dr. Ramsey told me you probably have an alternative number? Or maybe you could have access to Eleanor’s phone so we could get another number?”

“And what numbers do you have?”

“Her family emergency contact was her mom’s cellphone and a landline in Cincinnati.”

“And none of them works?”

“The cellphone is out of service, and no one answers in her house.”

Bryce frowned, thoughtful, and after a few seconds, he nodded.

“Oh. Of course. Eleanor’s parents aren’t in the city. They went to Chile to spend the national holidays with her mom’s family. We should try with her brother, he’s in college in Michigan. Where’s Eleanor’s phone?”

“It’s at the Diagnostics Office, with the rest of her belongings.”

Bryce and Aurora entered the empty office. In the center of the round table was a plastic bag with Eleanor’s clothes, shoes, and her phone. Bryce grabbed her phone and unlocked it with his fingerprint without a moment's hesitation.

Aurora chuckled without hiding the surprise in her eyes.

“What?”

“One thing is knowing her password, but adding your fingerprint?”

“It’s faster when you wanna put a song on Spotify.—He shrugged with a nonchalant expression on his face.—"She has access to mine too.”

Aurora and Marlene shared a knowing smile, but he didn’t notice it.              

Bryce scrolled through Eleanor’s contacts list. When he found “Benja”, he dialed instantly. After several rings, a whispering voice was heard on the other side of the line.

“Hello? Andrew? I’m in class right now.”

“Um, hello Benjamin, this is Bryce Lahela.”—He said softly.

“Bryce Lahela…  oh, shoot. Hello. You’re my sister’s boyfriend, right?”

“Y… Yes. Can we talk? I have something important to tell you.”

“Okay, wait a second.”

While he was waiting, Bryce couldn’t help but feel shivers down his spine. It was the first time he was talking to a member of Eleanor’s family, and even if he knew her family was aware of their relationship, it made him feel nervous reaching this milestone, especially under terrible circumstances, and after the doubts he had been feeling the past few days.

“Okay, I’m out. Something happened?”

Bryce tried to balance the concern of a boyfriend with the calmness and professionalism acquired in his medical career to not shock Benjamin more than necessary.

“Unfortunately, yes. There was an assassination attempt on a Senator here in Edenbrook, it was Eleanor’s patient, and she was caught in the middle. The hospital tried to contact your mother, but as she’s in Chile, I decided to contact you directly.”

“Shit. Yes, you did the right thing. How is she? What happened exactly?”

“She’s stable at the moment. This assassin used a canister with an unknown substance, so the hospital is working to figure out what was inside as soon as possible.  It already killed a man, and there’s a nurse in a coma."

“Oh my god, no…”

Bryce could sense the pain Benjamin was feeling even if he couldn’t see him. He knew how much Eleanor adored her brother, so it was natural that Benjamin would feel the same way about her. And knowing his sister was in danger of course would cause this type of reaction, especially being away.

“Is she awake? Can I speak with her?”

“She’s in quarantine, so is kind of difficult to let you talk through the phone, but I can try.”

“No, it’s okay. Don’t worry. I… I’ll fly as soon as I can to Boston.”

“Do you have a number so we can call your parents?”

“I’ll do it. I have my grandma’s landline, that’s the quickest way to contact mom.”

“Okay, then. Let me know if you need anything, alright? Do you have money to fly here?”

“Yes, I have a credit card to use in case of emergencies. Thank you, Bryce.”

“No problem.”

After a few more questions and Bryce giving him his number, Benjamin hung up. If he was lucky, he would be able to land in Boston in three hours.

“Okay, Benjamin is going to contact Eleanor’s parents and once he's here, they'll have a video call with the Team so they can inform Eleanor’s state more detailly.”

“Understood. Thank you so much, Dr. Lahela. I’ll let know Dr. Ramsey.”

“No problem, glad I could help.”

When Bryce grabbed his own phone to save Benjamin’s number, he noticed he had several missed calls and messages from Keiki.

“Bryce, I read that something happened at the hospital. Please answer me.” “I know you probably are in the OR but please call me when you see this” “Are you okay?”

Bryce sighed and dialed her number.

“Bryce? Oh my god, how are you? Why you didn’t answer!”

“I was at the surgery, Keiki. I told you it would last long”—He lied, but regretted it the second he let out the words.

“I know, but… I was worried, the news are saying the police is in the hospital, that someone tried to kill a Senator. Is that true?”

Bryce pondered his words. There was no point in lying, sooner or later she would find out, and it was better if it was from him.  So he told her the truth. That the rumors she saw on the news were true, and that Eleanor was in danger. Keiki was desperate and wanted to come over to the hospital to see her, but even if he needed his sister here, he had to play the responsible and serious older brother for once in his life.

“Keiki, it’s better if you stay at home. Is too dangerous here and I think Eleanor would kill me if I let you come over.”

She chuckled.

“That’s true. Better not give her a hard time.”

“Exactly.”

“Okay, but please, keep me informed.”

“I will. And if you need anything, please call me, and stay safe. I’m probably staying here tonight.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.  Please send Ella all my love if you see her, okay?”

“Sure, thank you, sis."

Three hours later, Bryce was deep in thoughts sitting in a chair near the atrium, when he saw the vivid image of Eleanor walking towards him.  He had to blink several times.

“Damn, pictures give you an idea, but I didn’t know you and Elle were so alike.— He joked, standing up from the chair and offering his hand to the guy in front of him. —"Hello Benjamin, nice to meet you.”

The situation wasn’t appropriate for jokes, but somehow Bryce felt like he needed to kill the tension from the start. Eleanor had told him her brother was ongoing and nice, and it just felt right to act that way with him, instead of serious and gloomy.

Benjamin returned the handshake and smiled.

He was way taller than Eleanor but not taller than him, and he had an athletic body, even if he wasn't on any sports team at college. He was just a soccer and basketball aficionado, or at least that’s what Eleanor had told him.

“Nice to meet you too, Bryce. For what it's worth, you’re as handsome as you seem in Ellie’s Pictogram. Thought you were using some Ken filter, but nope, that’s really you.—Benja teased, containing a laugh.

Bryce couldn’t help but chuckle.

“100% real, no weird filters, I promise.”

“Any updates?”

“None. She’s stable and was sedated right after we spoke the first time, so she should be awake by now. The rest is working in the labs trying to find out what could’ve been inside the canister.”

“And you’re not going?”

“I was hired as moral support. My friends are more expert in that field than me, I’m just a surgeon.”—Bryce replied sheepishly, shrugging.

“But the best surgical resident or that’s what I’ve heard.”

His eyes widened for a second, but then Bryce shook his head, amused.

“She told you that?”

“That and other fangirly praises like “oh, he’s so cute, so charming, and talented, the best surgeon, he’s amazing.”

His heart did a flip. He never expected Eleanor would talk about him like that to her brother. Or that she would talk about him at all.

“You must be really impressive to have my sister babbling like a teenager at the age of 27.”

“What can I say? I’m a total catch.”—Bryce gave him his characteristic charming smile, feeling somehow relieved for a moment. It was like Benjamin was giving him the same relaxed and nice vibes he always felt around Eleanor.

Benjamin laughed and Bryce’s heart did another flip as he saw traces of Eleanor’s smile in him. She was everywhere. In the shape of his eyes, the way he quirked his brows, in his grin, even he could hear her in his still marked Ohioan accent.

“Yeah, I’m pretty cocky too, ask my friends and everyone will say a round yes, but your sister doesn’t deserve any less.”

“I agree completely.”

After a few minutes, Bryce and Benjamin stood in front of the quarantined room. Eleanor was half-asleep staring at Rafael, who was sleeping.

“Andrew”—Benjamin muttered.

Eleanor was extremely pale, her eyes were puffy, and her lips parched and cracked, but the moment she opened her eyes and recognized Benjamin, her whole face brightened with love and surprise.  

“Benja! Ohmygod! What are you doing here?”

“Bryce contacted me so I had to come to see you. How are you?”

Eleanor stood up with difficulty. When she reached the door, her eyes were full of tears.

“Bebé… I’m… well, I’ve been better, but right now I’m so happy to see you.”

“Me too, sis.”

Both siblings shared a smile, the same kind smile, and Bryce couldn't help but mirror them.

“Well, I leave you to it. I’ll let Dr. Ramsey know you’re here so you can have the meeting with your parents.”

Bryce turned to leave but Eleanor stopped him.

“Bryce, wait.”

“Yes?”

“Thank you, thank you for calling my brother.”

Eleanor gave him a tender smile, full of thankfulness and adoration.

“Yeah, thank you, Bryce, for all you’ve done for my sister.”—Benjamin added, earnestly.

“It’s nothing. Let me know if you need anything.”

And he left the siblings catching up with their lives, the younger trying to cheer up the older with the usual jokes and mocks siblings have.

Hours later, Eleanor paged to report a new symptom Rafael had manifested before falling into a coma. Hopefully, it would be the key to find the answer they’ve been trying to reach all day.

“Bryce?”—Aurora murmured, approaching him in the hallway. “Dr. Ramsey wants to talk to you, he’s in his personal office.”

When Bryce turned to her he didn’t need a second glance to read the panic in her eyes. He gulped and then forced himself to smile at Eleanor.

“See you later, gorgeous.”

Bryce walked to the office as fast as he could. When he reached Ethan’s office, he breathed deeply before getting in. As he opened the door, he found the attending looking at the window, pensive. He looked small and fragile, and when Bryce stood behind him, he saw how haggard he was in the reflection of the window. After a few moments, Ethan turned to face him, and he didn’t even bother to hide his feelings.

“Do you know what’s in the canister?”

“Yes. June was right. It’s…”.—Ethan cleared his throat, brows knitted in worry.—“ It’s a maitotoxine.”

“Maitotoxine? I think I’m not familiar with the name.”

“It’s an extremely potent toxin commonly found in fish, but this… this toxin is something I’ve never seen before. Not June, not Baz…”—Ethan shoved his hand through his hair, evidencing his frustration.

“What does this mean?”—Bryce said in a tiny voice, already knowing what Ethan was about to say.

“There is no antidote for this, Bryce.”

For a moment, Bryce felt like he would faint, his mind went clouded, and lost track of space and time. His body wasn’t strong enough to process such information. Such undeniable and hurtful truth.

What he had been fearing all day was now materializing.

“And what are you going to do? Can you create an antidote or modify another one with a similar molecular structure? That has been done lots of times.”

“Yes, that’s what we are hoping to do. Aurora informed me that a group of doctors from Mass Kenmore is coming to Edenbrook to help, so we’ll have the best minds working on an antidote.”

But they had to have it before it’s too late.”

“You have to… you have to find the antidote, Ethan. She can’t die… She…”

Bryce suddenly got out of breath. The desperation was brewing again. The pain was inexorable. He couldn’t hold it anymore.

“I can’t lose her. Ethan, please… You have to...”

He couldn’t tell when happened, but all at once, he found himself drowning in sobs and with large tears streaming past his neck, reaching his chest.

He did his best to not succumb to his feelings in the OR because Kyra needed him, and he couldn't fail her nor Eleanor.

He managed to hold it while he was with Aurora because there was still hope and Aurora forced him to focus on Eleanor.

He was doing fine keeping his hopes high, trusting they would find out what was in the canister and then set a treatment and everything would be alright.

But there was no cure, no antidote.

Even if one hundred doctors were working on it, no one could assure him that they could do it before it’s too late. Before she’s gone.

He didn't even want to think in a world without her, but the sole draft, just a slight hint of it was devastating, unbearable.

He started gasping for air. His guts were shaking uncontrollably. The lump he felt in his throat at OR was now bigger and even more painful. His entire body was numb.

This was a living nightmare.

After a few seconds, Bryce took a chair and sat down before his legs could fail him.  Ethan did the same.

“We have to stay positive, Bryce. Many of us have experience with research and with the help of Mass Kenmore and your friends, I’m sure will be on time to fight the toxin.”

“I wanna believe that, I’ve been believing this shit all day, Ethan. But… if it’s too late. I…”—He rubbed his face with both hands, his face red and wet with tears. Then he buried his face in his hands.—“She doesn’t deserve this… She can’t die… Please…”

Ethan patted him in the shoulder, comfortingly, his eyes haunted with fear and sadness.

“Bryce, I won’t let anything happen to Eleanor ...”—He hesitated for a moment, pondering his next words.— “You know what she means to me. I know you do. And I’ll do everything I can to save her, I promise. Whatever it takes. I won’t let anything happen to her. "

Bryce looked at him defeated.

“If I could, I would do it too, but I’m so useless. I feel so useless.”

"No, Bryce, on the contrary, you have done for her more than any of us could. If she’s still able to have a smile on her face despite the hell she’s living, if she’s still standing is not only because she’s incredibly strong. It’s because she has you. You’re part of the reason she hasn’t fallen into a coma yet.”

There was a painful rawness in those words. In another time and circumstances, Ethan would have never been able to say it aloud, mostly for pride and because he didn’t use to open to anyone. But not today. His love for Eleanor was selfless enough to let him recognize that if she was doing good was because of Bryce, and she had given him enough bravery to accept it out loud in front of the person she had chosen over him. Because Ethan only needed one second of watching Eleanor looking at Bryce to realize she was in love with him.

The only person Eleanor needed, was Bryce.

Ethan’s words felt like an absolute and relieving certainty to Bryce, mostly because who was saying it was the person he would expect it the less, and it gave him the strength he needed to keep going. To keep being there for Eleanor in this difficult night.

“Thank you, Ethan.”—Bryce said after a while, regaining breath and clarity.

The attending nodded and then stood up from the chair.

“Come on, we have to speak with Eleanor, and she’ll need you by her side.”

Eleanor was hopeless. Bryce could tell how the slight hope she had inside her had vanished with the news.

“We’ll do our best to find the antidote. Just keep fighting Eleanor.”—Elijah reassured.

The doctors from Mass Kenmore and the rest of their friends started to go. Sienna was heading Benjamin to the fifth floor so he could have some rest. He didn’t want to leave the hospital in case something happened.

And then, there was only Ethan and Bryce outside the room.

Eleanor smiled at Ethan, noticing how troubled and scared he was, as if he didn’t want to leave her there, knowing things could go wrong anytime and he couldn’t say goodbye. But he knew it wasn’t his place to be anymore. He knew it was Bryce’s.

“Thank you, Ethan. For everything.”

“We’ll make it, Eleanor. Keep fighting just as you’ve been doing until now.”—He stared deeply into her eyes for a moment, before turning around and leave Bryce alone in the hallway.  

Bryce watched him leave, and when he looked at Eleanor, her swelling eyes were already on him, clinging onto him even if she couldn’t touch him. Like his eyes were strong and powerful enough to hold her to life.

She was tired. She was giving up.

“It’s gonna be okay, Elle, I promise.”

“It won’t. How they’re going to create an antidote in just a few hours? Raf and Danny are in a coma, they could go at any moment, so do I."

“Yes, it could happen at any moment, but that moment could take hours, even days, and I’m sure the team will have it on time.  They have a lot of brilliant people working on it, with tons of experience. They’ll make it, I know.”

Eleanor shook her head hastily, sobbing.

“It’s just I’m so tired, Bryce. I… I can’t take it anymore, I’m tired of being strong and show hope and shit, I want this to be over, I’m done.”

“I know you are, babe. You have been so strong and brave, it’s understandable that you want a break. You deserve it, but you have to keep fighting, okay?”

“The only reason I’m doing it it’s because of you. Because somehow you don’t let me fall. If it wasn’t for you, I don’t think I would be still standing. I don’t know I’d be here. I wouldn’t be that strong.”

Bryce smiled tenderly at her puffed eyes.

“You would. Don’t you know it already, Eleanor? That strength that you have is all you. You have it inside you. You always have.”

“Don’t you know it already, Bryce? You make me stronger. You know it’s true.”

“Glad to be of service.”—He flashed her a smile that made her smile too.—“But this is mostly you.”

“I wish I could hold you right now. I miss you so much.”

“Maybe you can.”

“How?”

“There’s another hazmat suit out here. I could go inside and make you company for a while.  I hate the idea of you being alone in a moment like this.”

“Would you do that for me?”

“How dare to ask that, Eleanor Andrea Bloom? You know I would do anything for you.”

Eleanor bit his lower lip, compassing her sobs for a moment.

“I’d love to have you here with me.”

“That’s it, then.”

A few minutes later, Bryce entered the room with the hazmat suit on, and a dashing smile adorning his face.  

“Well, what do you think? Am I still handsome? Or am I somehow more handsome? Be honest.”—He said flirtily.

She shook her head, chuckling.

“God, how I missed you, Johnny Bravo.”—She said looking at him from head to toes.—"I think it’s your best look yet. You’ll catch a lot of babes with that.”

“Ah,”—He growled, taking slow steps towards her— “but you know there’s just one babe I want, and I have it right here in front of me.”

Eleanor looked up at him, almost not believing he was in front of her, that she was able to touch him.

In an intent to believe it, she cut the distance and wrapped Bryce in a tight embrace.

“You’re here, you’re really here.”

“You’re not the only one who was dying for a hug, you know? Especially after all the opportunities, I wasted in these few days."

Bryce tightened his hold, almost scared that Eleanor would vanish into thin air any second now.

“Elle, I’m…”

“Shhh… Not now.”

He nodded and both remained silent, savoring the embrace, the sweet feeling of having each other in their arms. Even if they couldn’t feel the warmth and smell they loved so much, feeling their arms wrapped around those so well known curves was sufficient. It brought them joy, peace. A sense of reality in the middle of that living hell.  

After a minute, her limbs started trembling and her breath got short.

“Come on, babe, let’s get you to bed.”

Bryce took her hand and helped her laid down. Then, somehow, he managed to squeeze in the bed beside her.  

“How’s that?”

“Much, much better.”—Eleanor placed a hand over his waist and then added: —“My brother really liked you. A lot.”

“I know. I liked him too.”

“You know?”

“I told him I was a total catch, cause I am, and he agreed with me. That totally means that he likes me, right?”

“Bryce…”—She laughed, rolling her eyes.

“What? It’s the truth! I didn’t force him to agree or anything! I mean, you did half the job by telling him all those incredible things about me.”

“He told you that? Oh, that brat!”

Bryce shrugged, amused while Eleanor shook her head.

I’m glad you finally get to know each other, and you actually liked each other.”

"I mean, it's hard not to. He's really nice and you've told me so much about him I feel like I've known him for a long time."

“I think something like that happened to me with Keiki, even if I had absolutely no idea about her existence before I met her”—Eleanor teased, feigning annoyance.

“Keiki… She’s been worried about you all day. She was crazy to come up here, but I told her you would kill me if she came. But I’ve been giving her updates every hour.”

“Oh, yes. I would’ve been so fucking mad, Bryce Lahela. I’m glad you kept her safe.”—Then she sighed.—"The poor thing, must be all alone. You should go to see her.”

“I know, but I can’t leave you here, Elle.”

“Would it be too selfish of me if I tell you I don’t want you to leave?”

“No. Not at all.”—His look softened.—“I don’t want to leave, either. In fact, I won’t leave your side, Eleanor.”

Bryce gave him a tiny smiled and they stared at each other, savoring once again the moment of being together. After a while, Eleanor laughed.

“What is it?”

“You look so fucking handsome, Bryce, it’s ridiculous, and I look like shit. I’m done a complete mess.”

Bryce chuckled, spotting the dark circles around her eyes, her tousled hair, how pale she was. He really hadn’t noticed how bad she looked.

“Yeah, you look like shit”—He teased.—"But you know what? You’re still the most beautiful creature in the universe, princess.”

Her eyes were swelling with tears, and a moment later, a sob escaped her mouth.

“Okay, okay, I take it back,”—He added seconds, later, noticing her swelling eyes. “you don’t look like shit, you look amazing, babe, incredible. Ready for a Vogue photoshoot. Ready for the Oscars.”

Bryce couldn’t tell if what escaped her mouth was a sob or a giggle, but her face had lightened somehow.

Somehow, he managed to end her anguish and ease her pain.

Somehow.

He didn’t know how.

As if it was pure luck.

But she perfectly knew it wasn’t luck.

“Gosh, Bryce…”—She couldn’t continue. It felt like she was out of breath.—"Bryce I…”

She brought her hands to the side of his head, her thumbs over the face shield as if she was caressing his cheeks.

She locked eyes with him, and that look, that adoring look made him feel millions of shivers through his all body. Those dreamy tender eyes managed to convey all the emotions that were brewing inside her.

And Bryce was finally, finally able to see it, after missing it so many times that day.

“Te amo.”

He was at last, at last able to hear it, after longing for it for so long.

Her eyes were looking directly into his soul, into his heart, pouring everything she had inside to fill him with the most sincere and sweet love. With adoration, admiration, tenderness. With the purest feelings anyone could imagine.

And those two words sounded like relief. Like she had been choking and those words out loud were acting like the air she had been needing for so long.

“I love you so, so, so much, Bryce.”

And her eyes now were even fuller with adoration and candor. Full of happiness and life, even if ten minutes ago she had been feeling ready to die.

“I… I wish I had realized sooner, and these weren’t the circumstances where I’m able to say it… but if I don’t make it, I don’t want to go without you knowing what I feel about you.”

“Babe, you’ll make it, you don’t need to do this just because you’re here.”

“I’m doing this because that’s how I truly feel. I’m in love with you.”

“You really are?”

Even if he had been waiting for those words for months, he couldn’t believe it. Even if he had been receiving signs all day, from different people, he still couldn’t believe it.

“Yes. Yesterday I was finally able to see it, but it has been there for a while.”

“How so?”

“I’ll explain it later. You need to know some things first.”

“Okay.”

“As you know, I went to Ethan’s apartment after the game.”

“Aha.”

And she told him everything that happened that night. She didn’t keep anything. Well, except the personal stuff Ethan had shared with her, but the confession, the things he promised her, the kiss, how she felt after that, what she talked with Aurora. Everything. Because she had nothing to hide and he deserved to know everything, just as it always had been.

“And I just like that, I realized that I was over him. Just like you said. I was in front of the Ethan I used to love, telling me he loved me, offering me everything. But it turned out I… I didn’t want him anymore.”

“I’m sorry it had to be this painful to you. I had no idea you had been hurt so much.”

“Yeah, I had it blocked, but I’m sure I would’ve told you if it wasn't the case.

Bryce stroke her hair in the most tender way he could, his eyes haunted.

“I’m sorry, babe. I’m for being so distant and an ass with you. I should’ve let you talk, but I was afraid of what you would tell me”

“I know. I know and I completely understood it. But I can’t deny that at some point I was afraid that… I hurt you to the point of you not wanting anything to do with me anymore. That going with Ethan that night was the last straw and that no matter what happened between him and me, you… you would want to break up."

“No, of course not. How could I decide something like that without a warning? And with something I pushed you to do? No. I was just… trying to delay the inevitable. The suffering of knowing that you gave him a chance.”

“Well, I didn’t. And I realized that I was in love with you instead. At last.”

“Are you sure about that? You know there’s no need to hurry…”

“Bryce, why is so hard to believe it? Should I shout it with a megaphone, or maybe post photos and stories on my Pictogram telling that I’m truly, madly, deeply in love with you so you can believe me? Because I’m willing to.”

Bryce laughed, incredulous.

“Truly, Madly, Deeply. Damn. Just like that Savage Garden song?”

“The very same. I like the 90s.”

“A woman after my own heart.”

She bit her lower lip, smiling.

“I cannot believe how blind I was. It has been there, the whole time!”

“I’m listening.”

“It’s…”

Her whole face lit up with that sunny smile he loved so much. For a moment, he forgot where they were.

“It’s in the way I look at you, like a fool. Like I was fifteen. It’s the fact that you’re my first thought in the morning and my last one before going to sleep. You’re the first person I think of when something good happens, or when something bad happens too. In your arms is where I feel safe, and I know there's no other place I'd rather be. And god, I laugh with all your jokes, even the bad ones, and I don't find you cocky anymore because all that you say about yourself is true, and I think about you all the damn day, Bryce. I’m all day wanting for the day to end so I can see you and kiss you. And…”

Eleanor stopped for a moment, trying to catch some breath. Bryce shook his head. He had the stupidest smile she had ever seen on him. The same smile she was sure she had on her face right now.

“Another example? My brother. I haven’t been able to stop talking about you. It wasn’t like this from the beginning, but now I’ve just realized that the last few weeks I haven’t done anything but tell him, or my mom, how happy I am with you. I’ve been even imagining how it would be if I ever introduce you to my abuela. I bet she would adore you the moment she meets you, and she would love you more than me, and would cook your favorite meal, and would give you the last spoon of ice cream and… and I really don’t care, because you deserve it. You deserve the last spoon of ice cream, and my grandma’s meals, and … Everything. You deserve everything, Bryce.  I don’t know what else to say. I’m in love with you like a teenager, and I feel like never before. What did you do to me?”

He smiled, tears of joy streaming down his face. That slump in his throat hurt again, but for different reasons. It was for the absolute tenderness and adoration he was feeling inside his chest. Admiration. Love. God. He couldn’t understand how he could love her so much. How much she meant to him. How happy and complete she made him feel. He had never felt this for anybody before, he knew it already, but now he was realizing he would never feel this way for anybody else, ever.

“I’m crazy about you too, Eleanor. I’ve been holding these feelings for so long to not scare you or pressure you, but god, I feel the same way. I think about you all day, and every time I think about the future, you’re in there.”

“That’s a relief, because for a moment I thought I was being too cheesy and clingy.”

“Babe, you’re always cheesy. You can’t help it around me.”

“You created a monster, Bryce Lahela.”

“I like cheese. I would eat cheese all day. And for the record, I would definitely share the last spoon of ice cream with you"

Bryce winked at her and then pressed her body against his.

“God, I wish I could kiss you.”

“You will.”

“But I want to kiss you noooow."

Eleanor pouted and butterflies fluttered ferociously in his stomach. She made him feel like fifteen too.

“Well, miss impatience, is nice to finally meet you.”

"Tell me that you're not dying to kiss me right now."

“I am. But we’ll have to manage with what we have for now.”

“How so?”

“Imagination. How would you like me to kiss you the next time?”

“If there’s a next time.”

Bryce scowled her and squeezed her waist.

“There will be. You’ll get through this, babe. I promise.”

She gave him a sad smile.

“So?”

“So what?”

“How will you want me to kiss you after you get out of here.”

“Mmm… I think… Slow and sweet, just like our ‘first kiss’ at Isabella’s”

“Mmm what a good kiss. Cute and romantic.”

“Or maybe passionate and breathtaking, just like that kiss at the beach, on your birthday. God, I can’t decide!”

“Don’t worry, we can always try both.”

“I hope so.”

“We will. You have to believe me.”

“Okay. I believe you. If I die, I’ll come to visit you every night, Bryce Lahela.”

“Lucky for me you won’t die. I would hate to have your ghost every night by my side and not being able to kiss you and do you dirty things.”

“Bryce!”—Eleanor giggled. “Okay, okay, I believe you. Bring me that dreamy kiss now!”

“Close your eyes.”

Eleanor obeyed and closed her eyes.

“Remember that night at the Museum?”

“I could never forget”—She muttered—.

Bryce took her hand and with the tip of her fingers, he brushed her lips delicately, exposing her inner lip for a moment. Then with her thumb, he caressed her mouth.

“I will kiss you sweetly and delicately while I hold you by the waist, transmitting how much I love you, how much you mean to me. How happy I am to have you in my life.”

After a few seconds, she opened her eyes, smiling.  

“That night was perfect.”

“Yeah, and you looked gorgeous.”

“But you, you were stunning in that silky pink shirt… And the night was so nice. Warm and starry. Oh, and there was music playing.”

“Yes, that slow jazz… When I fall in love… It will be forever”—He sang slowly.

“Or I’ll never fall in love…”—She continued.—“You remember the song?”

“Obviously. It played on my mind on repeat for like two weeks.”

“Oh. That means you had that kiss playing on repeat on your head for two weeks?”

“I plead the fifth.”

She chuckled.

“Well, I, for one, thought about that kiss a lot in the following days. Another example of how goofy you leave me.”

“Good I wasn’t the only one.”

Suddenly, her smile faded, and Eleanor looked at him earnestly.

“Thank you for taking a chance on us that night, Bryce. Since that day you’ve given me nothing but happiness. And I’m sure that from that day there was no returning point for me. Sooner or later I would fall for you, and I’m glad I finally did.”

“I would do it a million times, in a heartbeat, Eleanor.”

“And I’d choose you a million times, over and over again. I only wish that none of those million times had to involve me dying just when I realized I was in love with you.”

“You’ll make it, babe. I have so much love to give you, that I won’t let you go so easily.”

_____

A/N: Hello! If you make it this far, I have to thank you! I know it was a super long chapter, but it was really important (for the story and for me) and I honestly didn’t want to save words, nor split it in two chapters.

If I had to resume Bryce in this chapter in two words those would be: Husband material. And next chapter will be husband material x3264546.

Thank you for all your support, I hope you liked this chapter. I’d love to hear your opinions in the comments.

A big hug to each and every one of you!

A/N2: *spoiler* Graphic description of Eleanor after chapter 17:

I think it works the other way around too 😂

[tartagilicious]

Gavin Eternal Wedding Karma Date (translated)

there was an issue with Tumblr and the original text was deleted. this is the same content, but w/o the cgs and also bolded names to make reading it easier. sorry for the inconvenience :(

spoilers for a date not on the EN server below the cut~

MC: Anna, has everyone reached their places?

Anna: rest assured, i’ve checked with them all, there will be no problems, and the photographer will come find me with the situation of the drone.

Anna: you’re the bride of the day, if you run around like this, the makeup artist’s hard work for two hours will be in vain!

MC: you’ve all worked hard…

Near valentine’s day, the company planned a collective wedding called “Fairy Tale Dream”.

We ran through the city’s wedding company and finally found 99 new couples who were willing to cooperate with us in the collective shooting in the “Fairy Tale World” themed park in Lianyu City. (tn: loveland city)

We will arrange these 99 couples to stand in different positions in the park, from the lawn at the entrance of the park to the retro street in front of the castle to the church decorated with flowers.

The said drone equipped with a camera will fly through the entire park according to a predetermined path for shooting, and the new couples will have to put out a specific act when it passes.

We want to pass this kind of ‘one mirror to the end’ technique, where we will take the fairy tale aspect of the whole paradise and have the atmosphere and happiness recorded.

Though, I didn’t expect that a few days before shooting, a few couples couldn’t come due to emergencies! In our desperation, we could only find stand-ins among ourselves.

Willow, Kiki and I have gone together only to make it up to the number 99.

I smoothed out my snow-white skirts -- although the dress is only borrowed, and the groom is fake, I'm still sure that every girl will have a heart full of longing for such a wedding.

After all, it’s really beautiful…

Should I take a picture for him?

I talked to him last 3 days ago, and I don't know if his mission was going well.

As soon as this thought arose, my phone rang. It was my “groom” Minor.

[over the phone] Minor: Hi boss….

Minor’s voice was so sleepy!

MC: Are you still at home? Filming will start in half an hour!

[over the phone] Minor: I…

[over the phone] Minor: I stayed up all night last night and went to bed at four. Can I take a day off?

MC: What?!

This is the fairy tale wedding that I prepared for nearly two months, and already at the last moment before shooting, Minor has released my doves? (tn: she’s saying that because he won’t show up, he’s ended everything before anything even happened.)

MC: you’re my partner, who am I going to film with if not you?

For a moment, I was so godless that I couldn’t help but raise my voice

Anna: What happened? Minor won’t come?

MC [to Minor]: You come here right now, and I’ll tell the photographer to wait for you! If you don’t appear in front of me in half an hour, I will--

[over the phone] Minor: Wait, wait until I finish talking, boss -- Although I can’t come, your groom will not be absent.

MC: what do you mean?

Minor was one step ahead of me and hung up the phone without waiting for me to speak. I hadn’t even responded yet, and a familiar voice suddenly came from behind me.

Gavin: Am I late?

As I turned around, I couldn’t help but feel stunned. The man in a suit and leather dress shoes stood a few steps away from me. His light chestnut hair was covered in gold from the sun, his amber eyes were enveloped in fine shimmers, and the corners of his normally unsmiling lips were slightly raised. He had a clean jawline, and this smooth, somewhat sharp line immediately followed his thin neck and wide shoulders that were covered under his shirt.

It’s the man I’m familiar with, but it’s not the same as usual…

The ten slender fingers are holding a pair of ice-like crystal shoes that shine in the sun, and the upper part of the shoes shines brightly as well, like the stars or a firefly.

MC: Gavin, you…

I was still at a loss for words. Gavin came over to me naturally, stooped down and knelt in front of me. At the next moment, warm fingertips touched my ankles and I bit my lower lip subconsciously.

The wind in February is cold, but my face becomes hot instantly. At the same time, I clearly hear the sound of my heart in the left-most side of my chest, again and again.

I looked down at Gavin, and all of my emotions were stuck in my throat. It turned out that it was quite a feeling to be found by him in a big crowd.  Every year, Spring is given meaning, and every moment of waiting for happiness is suddenly fulfilled. (tn: kind of complicated, but she’s basically saying that she feels the traditional relief and comfort of spring looking down at Gavin.)

After changing a shoe, I noticed that I was not standing steadily. Without hesitation, I put my hand in his palm. I let him take my weight and stepped into the second shoe delicately.

Gavin stood up quickly and took the balloon in my hand. Anna then stepped forward to straighten my hair for me and set the veil down again, making sure that my makeup had no flaws while smiling with ease.

Anna: I am a bit reluctant to send you off to marriage all by yourself.

I glanced at Gavin with corners of my lips turned up in a smile, and muttered softly.

MC: we’re not getting married…

Anna smiled and held her hands up in surrender, but her eyes still fell on the hands that Gavin and I hadn’t yet let go of. She looked cheerful.

Anna: I’ll clean up here, you hurry up and prepare.

I looked at Gavin and smiled at him slightly.

Gavin: Ready to go?

MC: ok!

I never thought I would have such a one-on-one walk with Gavin in these blooming flowers, leading to a fairytale kingdom.

With every step, the pleasant sound of the crystal shoes stepping on the ground rang in my ears. Maybe a fairy has put some magic on me? Maybe then I can have the surprise and happiness of Cinderella.

MC: Gavin, actually I was thinking just now, if you wouldn’t have seen me looking so beautiful today, it would’ve been a pity.

Gavin: Well, then it’s a good thing I came.

The designated shooting location for Gavin and I was the terrace on the third floor of the castle. I carefully took the skirt in my hands and walked up the castle’s circular staircase step by step. Probably only because I was insecure. Gavin held my hand sweetly, lifting it slightly. Every step was slow and careful, but he was patient.

Sunlight shines into the castle from the windows filled with stained glass, casting colourful lights and shadows on the dark cyan stone bricks and pure white steps. The huge dome itself depicts exquisite Greek mythology, and the golden bows and arrows of Eros around the edges point directly to the dark blue night full of stars.

A pure white and flawless wedding dress, magic crystal shoes, and a gorgeous castle -- although the teenage mind has imagined so-called fairy tale weddings countless times, I never imagined that one day my own dream would become reality.

Although unexpected, it made me feel that this arrangement of fate is a good thing for me.

I looked through the veil at Gavin. Somehow, since he appeared in front of me, even though it’s just a simple shooting for work, it’s made me inexplicably nervous.

MC: Gavin, when did you come back?

Gavin: Last night. Minor sent me a message two days ago saying that you were missing a partner, so I finished the task as soon as possible to come back.

My footsteps took a light pause. Sounds like I caused him trouble again….  

(tn: and she’s just gonna ignore how minor never planned to come in the first place sfksjh)

I sighed to myself, a thank you almost escaping, but I swallowed it back after a short moment of hesitation.

MC: I didn’t expect the shoot to be temporarily short of people, but this doesn’t matter so much. You didn’t need to rush back.

Gavin: It matters.

There was a light smile on Gavin’s lips.

Gavin: Whether it’s real or not, only you could be my bride.

His tone still carries the usual carelessness, but every word and every sentence he spoke falls straight into my heart. Although he always understates such solemn promises, he never says things like that.

He is my fearless knight, always falling from the sky when I need him most, giving me the most comprehensive protection -- without exception. If I have him, I have unlimited courage.

I held his hand tight and wanted to convey to him all my euphoria and gratitude at the moment through my palm temperature.

Every step of my heels on the marble floor echoed throughout the building. This road to our future is paved by out short and long life in the past --

MC: Gavin?

Gavin: Yes?

MC: Do you think that if the prince did not find Cinderella, would he marry another princess?

Gavin: No. After you’ve identified something, you won’t just stop looking for it.

As soon as his words fell, we walked through the last step, and my eyes were suddenly blinded. Sunshine and white pigeond are spread in every corner of the terrace, the vines climbing on the railing to lazily stretch out to branches and leaves. Standing here overlooking the paradise, I see everything in the scenery reflected in Gavin’s eyes.

The shimmering coins in the wishing pool, the flag flying on the pirate ship below and another flock of white pigeons flying over the castle -- I couldn’t help but gasp.

MC: The last time I was here it was a rainy day, but I didn’t expect to miss such scenery!

Gavin: Since you see it now, it’s not a miss.

Just as I was fascinated by a white dove resting on the railing of the terrace, a ray of blue smoke floated over the large lawn at the entrance.

MC: It’s the signal to start shooting!

A cheerful waltz sounded, and countless gorgeously dressed fairy tale characters rushed from all sides to the main street in front of the castle, singing blessing songs for all of the new couples to hear. The white wedding dresses of the brides rotate with their elegant dance postures, blooming like blossoming camellia.

Several pumpkin cars slowly drove past, throwing wine and gold leaves and petals around. At this moment, the colourful balloons in the hands of the grooms took off. Pages of fairy tale chapters are being staged, and the magic and magnificent love on the pages of the yellow-ish book are now unfolding right in front of my eyes.

While I was immersed in the joyous atmosphere in front of me, the drone in the distance appeared in my sight -- I didn’t expect it to come so fast!

I took repeated breaths in an attempt to calm down.

Gavin: Cold?

Sensing my increasingly stiff expression, Gavin shifts closer.

MC: No, I’m just… a little nervous.

Although I am already familiar with the next process, I did not seriously participate in the rehearsal, after all. I can’t help but feel guilty about possibly ruining the upcoming official shooting.

MC: Gavin, remember to lift my veil later and let go of the balloons.

After this sentence was finished, I realised that the scripted action of looking at each other affectionately was originally written in the planning case by me….

That’s embarrassing.

I could feel my ears turning more red and tried to pull my hand out of his, but failed.

MC: it is to lift the veil and let go of the balloon, so….

So he should have a free hand. But, he only held my hand tighter.

At this moment, the drone was flying slowly towards the terrace. I was about to remind him again when a breeze blew in front of me, gently lifting my veil -- the piece of fabric was gone and now, I could clearly see Gavin’s face.

He stepped forward about half a step closer, released the balloons according to the predesigned plan, and the free hand wrapped gently around my waist. I blinked and clearly saw the smile of his amber eyes, the most dazzling light in the world, reflected in my eyes at that moment.

I don’t know how long it took before Gavin stepped away.

The drone had long disappeared, and the entire park has been filled with colourful balloons.

I took two steps to the edge of the railing, and even when seeing that the shoot was now completed below, the couples were still hugging tightly. There are also some jokes and laughs down on the grass -- you are carrying me, and I’m pulling you -- but whatever the action, everyone is smiling.

MC: That’s nice….

I was relieved by their smiles, no matter what the results of the shooting are, this moment makes it all worth it!

I found myself having slightly red eyes subconsciously, but it was suddenly enveloped by a burst of warmth. In the blink of an eye, something dripped from my eyes and crossed my lips that were always raised.

Gavin hugged me from behind, and when I imagined this picture, he tightened his arms and held his breath. He lowered his head, his chin resting gently above my forehead.

Gavin: What are you thinking?

I watched the bride closest to us raise her phone and take several pictures with the groom.

MC: When i first started this planning, I always felt that the form was greater than the content. After all, compared to a wedding ceremony, the atmosphere of a park and the drone shooting are the key points.

MC: But later, I felt that the form was less and less important. It’s the most significant thing to witness the most important moment in the life of so many people! It turns out that happiness can be seen: there is sound, there is temperature. Yeah….

My hand was covered with the back of Gavin’s, and my fingertips touched the rough marks his guns had left over the years. Then, he intertwined his fingers with mine, leaving no gaps.

MC: ...Happiness can be touched.

Gavin didn’t speak anymore, and a light smile flicked my ears. The long silence stretched this warm moment for a long, long time, but every second, I subconsciously hope that the next will be longer.

Soon, all of the colourful balloons disappeared into the clear sky, so it seems like the shooting should all be over.

I immediately picked up Gavin’s hand and ran back the way we originally came.

MC: come with me ---

I led him out of the castle and ran along the avenue full of petals to the deserted game area. The park is not open to the public today, but due to the shooting requirements, all game equipment is in operation. And lucky for us, the entire area is covered by one after another.

Seven or eight pigeons stood in the open space in front of the carousel. I took a few hesitant steps forward, and although I deliberately slowed my pace, the pigeons still jumped and flew off in surprise.

Gavin: Seems these pigeons are very afraid of life, and they’re not very obedient.

MC: No!

I reached into the small bag I carried with me and pulled out two small packs of pigeon food, shaking it in front of Gavin.

MC: these are props I “borrowed” from shooting. During this time, I’ve been friendly with them, so they’re a bit closer to me.

I threw a handful of pigeon food all over the open space. In an instant, all the white pigeons passed by in front of us and stopped to grab food between their small beaks.

Watching them happily eat, I couldn’t help getting closer.

MC: Eat a little bit more and go home full. But in the future I ask for you to visit often!

Group of pigeons: coo coo! (tn: felt like i had to keep it lol)

I do not know if it understood what I said. Several white pigeons raised their heads to look at me with beady eyes, but when I looked back, a fat white pigeon was already perching on Gavin’s index finger.

He was shrouded in the morning sun as thin as a tulle . The tie that had been neatly worn was slightly loosened by him, and the suit waistcoat was also loosened by two buttons.

I stepped forward and lightly touched the white pigeon’s talon, but the little guy ignored me and only looked up and Gavin.

Gavin: If it depends on me to eat, it’s probably not very hungry.

MC: either that or it knows you can eat a big meal here.

I flipped my bag open again, and I found the last bag of pigeon food. I ripped the package open under the heavy gaze of the white pigeon, and it stared at the food. The fat pigeon immediately flew from Gavin’s finger and stopped at me. However, it only took two bites before suddenly flying off --

Gavin: Someone’s whistling.

MC: ah, well, we agreed with the owner of them that they could be picked up around this time.

All the pigeons seemed to notice, and suddenly spread their wings to rise into the air, leaving only small scraps of food behind. Watching them fly higher and higher, I hurriedly waved at them, and then looked at Gavin with a smile.

MC: Shall we go home too? You can rest for a while and wait for me to cook a big meal for you!

Gavin: That sounds good.

Gavin strode forward and took my hand, and his brow suddenly stretched as he smiled slightly.

Gavin: You have cold hands (tn: it’s worth mentioning he has a very sad expression in this frame)

He immediately draped his blazer over my shoulders, and pulled his collar tightly around my shoulders exposed to the cold wind.

Gavin: Sit down and rest for a while, we don’t have to rush.

I looked at the low bench, then my wedding dress. After all, it is borrowed clothing….

Gavin seemed to understand my worries and took me into his arms directly without saying a word.

MC: Gavin!

Suddenly, my feet were off the ground, and I exclaimed in shock. When my reaction came, he had already entered the carousel area and placed me firmly on a wooden horse. However, as soon as he lets go, the game starts a new round of rotation. Sitting on the shifting wooden horse, I unexpectedly lost my balance!

Subconsciously, my hands grabbed for the nearest support -- a white dress collar.

Gavin: Afraid? I won’t let you fall.

He took another half step, and I was finally able to relax after regaining my sense of security.

It’s just that I still dare not let go with my feet off the ground, so I subconsciously gently hooked my arms around his shoulder. A brilliant string of lights shone above my head, and warm and joyful music was playing. In a flash, I felt like I was pulled back into the fairy tale dream.

MC: Gavin… Thank you for coming back for me.

Gavin: What?

MC: Whether it’s true or false, I want to only be your bride.

The bell of noon is ringing -- the fairy’s magic has not disappeared. My knight, who has seen me look so embarrassed and silly for so many times, still pulls out his sword in the face of the evil dragon and witch, and firmly stands in front of me.

His tall back is the deepest notch left in my memory. The wind and frost condensed in his eyes is the starlight that I am willing to look to for my entire life. The sea breeze blows between my fingers, and I gather my fingers to hold them tightly in my palm.

At this moment, I don’t know how I can express my love for him in words. I can only stare at him in wonder, and I can’t bear to look away

Gavin: ……

With a small chuckle, he leaned over and drew closer to me. At the moment when our eyes were locked, I held my breath slightly, and then he moved closer and dropped a soft kiss on my lips.

Afterwards, I saw the colourful lights on the top of the carousel’s stacked halo, and saw the white pigeons passing through the cloudless sky -- I wondered for a moment whether I fell into the most beautiful dream in the world.

Gavin’s warm breath completely surrounded me. He held my face tenderly in one hand and rested the other gently on my waist.

Every plunder did not go in depth, nor did he leave. I was dazzled by it and did not want to wake up.

Gavin: When you are ready -- you can be my bride at any time

[mandochlorian]

white flag (kylo ren x reader)

part I part II part III

summary: sneaking out of the resistance base on Ajan Kloss isn’t the safest idea. but you have to reach out to Ben just once more, in case you never see him again.

song inspiration

general masterlist

star wars masterlist

You try to stop your hands from trembling, watching them as they rest upon the Millenium Falcons controls. The cockpit is silent, harbouring the sound of your breathing alone, you’re nervous. Stars, you’re so terrified of seeing him again. And you’re terrified of making it back to the Resistance base and forgetting all about Ben Solo, or having to forget about him.

The small planet of Pasaana comes into view and you suck in a deep breath, knowing he’s here along with your friends. They have no way of escaping, the Resistance was hesitant to send a scout in fear of losing more numbers, so you left to help your friends; at least that’s what you’ll tell Leia when she scolds you for putting yourself in danger in front of Kylo Ren.

“Alright,” you mumble to yourself nervously, “Let’s do this.” 

Bringing the ship into land in a field of sand, you eye the small village before you. It’s filled with a crowd of people. As the Falcon settles on the sand, you can hear the music blasting from just past the small sand dune. Passing the corridor, you head to the boarding ramp, your lightsaber by your side. But as soon as the boarding ramp is halfway down, there are blasters being fired at you. Hitting the button to your side, the doors halt halfway, prompting a stormtrooper to poke his head through the gap. You use this as an opportunity to knock him back with the end of you saber before the ramp continues to open. 

The trooper lays on the floor, holding his head. Stretching a hand out to him, you send him into a deep sleep and head towards the sand dune. Standing on top of it, you look out to see absolute heaven. You can’t stop the smile that reaches your face, the people dancing, singing, families crowded around one another, eating, laughing... happy. 

This planet is at peace, even with a war raging on. Just as quickly as the feeling of joy had appeared, something tugs at your chest. You know the force enough to know what this feeling is. Walking from the village, you make your way to the middle of the desert. And you wait. You sit, cross-legged, waiting, eye closed as you reach out. 

A frown makes it’s way to your face as you try not to let the tears fall. “Ben,” you whisper, feeling Kylo approach you. You open your eyes gently to the sound of a ship ripping through the air. It’s him. He lands. You stand up to meet him, seeing him exit the tie fighter. 

Clenching your teeth together, you watch him as he marches towards you. His lightsaber ignites, crackling and hissing at his side as he stops in front of you. “Get out of my way.” His deep voice rings out, barely sounding like himself through the mask.

Your weapon stays on your hilt, comfortably, “Take that helmet off.” 

“I won’t take this helmet off ever again.”

His posture is stiff, as though he’s trying to hold the tremble of rage flowing through him. You’re patient and considerate, and you don’t raise your voice at the man before you. “Then consider this the last time anyone will see your face. Your true face.” 

Without a single word, Kylo takes it off. He holds it by his side, looking to you expectantly. He speaks. “Well? Have you decided whether you’re going to live or die yet?”

That comment makes you laugh a little and you look to the sky, “You have to decide that yourself. I just want to talk to you.”

“I don’t have time to talk to Rebel scum like you-”

“Then just listen,” you tell him, looking into his eyes solemnly. “How can you choose to be evil when you feel the light? When you know what’s right and what’s wrong?”

“Anger.” He whispers back quietly. His voice is low and deep, holding a lifetime of vengeance. Kylo glances up at his father's ship, “Anger makes it difficult to see what’s in front of me.” 

“I’m in front of you.” You tell him, “For the last time ever.”

Kylo’s face then changes. He turns his lightsaber off, puts it back on its hilt. “Y/N,” His voice lowers, seeing the look in your eyes. His own eyes narrow at you, squinting slightly. He can’t sense your intentions, “Why are you here?” 

You promised yourself you wouldn’t get emotional. But there’s no way you can’t. Without a word, you hold your hand out for him to take. Kylo stares at you blankly, not even giving your hand a single glance. You don’t want him to see you cry. Not now. Not when you have to be stronger than you’ve ever been. Frowning, you rip your hand away from him and turn around to wipe a tear from under your eye. 

You pause before you admit to him, “I love you.”

Kylo pauses, his eyes wide in disbelief mixed with shock, “Still?” He whispers to you, unable to stop the memories of you two. Memories from your childhood, from training, from time spent together on the Resistance Base, “You shouldn’t.”

“I know,” you cry out, looking down at your feet, “And I shouldn’t be telling you... But even if I didn’t tell you, I’d still feel it.”

Kylo sneers at you, trying to ignore the pain he feels at your sorrow, “Why are you making this so hard for me?” 

You shake your head, letting out a laugh, “I’m not trying to. Really, I’m not.” You admit to him, placing a hand to your heart as you sniff, “This is hard for me too, understand that...” Swallowing the lump in your throat, you examine his features. 

Kylo notices how you admire him and he looks down, sucking the inside of his cheeks gently. Part of him feels this internal struggle to push you away, to force all good things from his life. “Hard for you?” He speaks up, taking the same route he’s been trying for years, “You chose this for yourself! Why did you have to be part of the Resistance? You could’ve lived a quiet life, settled down... you could've had no part in this story. Wouldn’t that have been easier?”

“Maybe,” you blink, knowing it would’ve been a pointless life, “But I didn’t give up on you back then. That’s the choice I made.” 

“You’re a fool.”

Your eyes flutter with tears, “Baby-”

“No! You are!” He exclaims, his chest heaving, “You think there‘s hope for me still? You made your decision, let me make mine.”

You shake your head at him, wanting nothing more than you hold him and take him home, “I know this isn’t you, you don’t have to do this. Ben... Ben, you’re breaking my heart.”

“Then let it break!” He shrugs, his eyes wide and wild with anger and confusion, “Let it turn hateful towards me! That’s what everyone else has done. Wouldn’t that be easier?”

“None of this is easy!” You finally shout back at him, pointing to him then to yourself, “You, me, nothing has ever come easy for us! But you started a war, you went down a path that wasn’t made for you, Ben. And I’m afraid that-”

“What?” He mutters, taking a step closer to you, “What are you afraid of?” Kylo asks, half expecting you to say his name.

“If you don’t turn back now...” You mumble, feeling the tears build up in your eyes, “It can only end with one of us dead.”

Kylo tilts his head slightly, his own eyes staring into yours; red, examining, unthreatened. “Have you come to kill me, Y/N? Or to save my soul?”

You ignore his question, settling to answer it with a decision you’ve made, “This is the last time we meet on these terms.” You tell him, watching his expression change.

Kylo bites the inside of his cheek, knowing exactly what you mean. It wasn’t uncommon for the two of you to meet one another, share secret and guilty moments together. If this were more private, and the two of you were on an uninhabited planet, you’re sure his arms would be around you. No one knew about it, of course. Not even Snoke, not even General Leia, not even Rey or Poe. It was your secret to keep. every once in a while, you would talk to one another, you would ignore the fact that your heart would be breaking at his dark clothes and his plagued mind. 

Kylo gulps. Kylo pretends that doesn’t affect him. But Kylo also knows that you are the only one who gives him the strength to go on. You locked yourself in your room for two days, bridging yourselves through the force just so you could help him overcome his grief for his father. “So you are giving up on me, then?” He spits, walking past you, almost circling you as he looks up at the Falcon.

“No,” you shake your head, following his movements, “Never.”

“But you won’t see me anymore?” He states matter of factly, snapping around to look at you. His eyes convey something different... fear? “You’ll block me out, even with the force.”

“Yes.” You suck in a deep breath, taking a step closer to Ben. You don’t care if there are people looking for the two of you on this planet. You place a hand on his cheek. Kylo holds himself back, but can’t help but lean against your gentle touch. “I won’t ever stop loving you and I will never lose the hope that you can return home,” You whisper to him, gently dragging your thumb across his cheek. His eyes shut sweetly, and for a moment he looks like he’s in peace, “But this war needs to come to an end.” He opens his eyes, gazing at you as you speak, “The Resistance are fighters. I’m one of them. And I’ll die before I ever give up on ending this war. Don’t expect me to put my hands up and surrender to you, Ben, because it’s not going to happen. We need to accept that we’re on opposites sides of this war, and I will go down with this ship.”

“Will I really never see you again?”

“No,” you tell him, your hand coming to rest on his chest, “Not like this, at least. When we meet, which I’m sure we will, I’ll still love you. And it will still kill me. There isn’t any way I’d ever stop loving you, Ben, even now after all you’ve done, I... I can’t stop needing you. Wanting you.” Feeling more tears surface, you step away from him. You wipe your eyes with your sleeve, sniffing quietly, “And that’s why I’m doing this. If you won’t join me... then I can’t keep letting people die at your hand while I secretly meet you in the night.” 

“If I knew this was the last time, I...” He cuts himself off, standing up straighter as though he isn’t tearing up at the loss of the only person who loves him. Kylo sniffs, wiping his eyes and moving away from you, “I love you.” He says casually, frowning as he begins to walk away from you. Kylo turns his head slightly, pain running through his chest as he heads towards his tie fighter, “I’ll see you on the battlefield.” 

Suddenly, his hand is out, facing the sand dune. A laser remains mid-air, once fired from Finn's blaster. Your eyes are wide. You watch Rey, Poe, and Finn rush towards the Falcon, chased by stormtroopers. Walking past the beam, Kylo puts his hand down and allows the laser to hit the sand and dissipate.

“Once we get the hell out of here, you need to tell us what the hell is going on,” Poe announces, shooting down some troopers as he rushes past you to get into the Falcon. Seeing Rey and Finn fighting the troopers off, you use the force to knock your enemies on their feet, allowing them to run onboard. They’re confused, you can tell, they’re wondering why Kylo Ren didn’t put up more of a fight. Why did he let them escape with their lives? It’s unlike him to be passive.

Hearing the ship roar to life, you tear your eyes away from Kylo. You make your way on board, heading straight to the cockpit and into the pilot's seat. Punching in co-ordinates for anywhere other than here, you take a breath before the ship takes off, speeding into the air unfollowed. 

Goodbye, Ben.

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Roguish Women Part 29

Summary: Kate is an American who fled to Paris to escape her past life. Now she's dancing and playing the part of a courtesan at the Moulin Rouge. There she meets Tommy Shelby who thinks she can be useful in expanding his empire. But has he been blinded?

Part 29: Kate tells her truth

            Francis Lynch was a wreck. She could barely stand or hold her head up and it had been three hours since the police had left. Three hours since one of the detectives informed her of her husband’s accident. In the wee hours of the morning, Ryan Lynch, drunk as a skunk, had fallen into the Boston Harbor and drowned.

            “What am I going to do?” She wailed from her seat at the kitchen table. Her head was in her hands.

            Her eighteen-year-old daughter was sitting on the floor, her knees tucked to her chest. “It’ll be alright, mom.” She said quietly. Tears streamed down her cheeks. Her father was never the person he was meant to be. He worked twelve hours a day then spent his free time in the pub. He was never particularly loving toward his only child. After all, she was simply a mistake in his eyes. Young and reckless, he got Francis pregnant and his Catholic father guilted them into marriage.

            But Kate was still sad. She still loved him.

            “It won’t be alright!” Francis cried. “We’ll lose the apartment, we’ll lose everything!”

            “No, we won’t.” Kate stood up shakily and tried to comfort her mother. “I promise we’ll be alright.”

~~~~~ 

            “I worked to help pay the bills and to pay my neighbor for ballet lessons,” Kate explained. She sat down on the bed as she started to explain everything, she had lied to him about. “My mom worked too but my father brought in the most money.”

            Tommy wasn’t sure he expected the story to go so far back. In his experience, the farther back a story went, the more lies there were. But he tried to keep an open mind, she was being honest with him even if he was hesitant about it.

            “When my father died, we would’ve become homeless in a couple of months.”

            Tommy frowned. “You didn’t tell me your father died.” As far as the story went, or at least the one he was led to believe, Kate’s father was the reason for all of her troubles. Someone who was caught up in the American mafia, who placed all the burden on Kate.

            “Just, just listen.”

            He nodded and went to sit beside her on the bed. The last thing he wanted was for a confrontation so soon after reuniting with her. That’s why he had wanted to at least delay the truth. But he also didn’t want her to feel guilty either.

            “I’d known Frank Wallace and his brother Steve for a long time. They were already established as the Gustin Gang by that point and they controlled most of South Boston. I met Frank through my neighbor who taught me lessons. He had helped her rent and legal issues. So, I went to him after my father died.”

~~~ 

            “Girl like you shouldn’t be dealing in those sorta things, Katie,” Frank warned.

            They were at one of the bars the Wallace brothers owned. One of the places Kate’s father frequented. Kate looked around the place, wondering if this was the last place her father had been before he left and fell into the Harbor.

            “I don’t think I have a choice.” She replied quietly.

            “I’ll help you find a good job with better pay.” He assured her. “Don’t worry about your landlord either, I’ll pay him a visit if he gives you trouble ‘bout the rent.”

            To anyone else, it would’ve sounded like the perfect scenario. Having friends in gangs sometimes had its perks. But Kate shook her head. “I don’t want that, Frankie. You know how long I’ve been training to dance. I’m not going to give that up so I can work myself to death like…” She paused. “Whatever.”

            Frank tapped his knuckles on the table. “But to get into shit like bootlegging? You’re only gonna bring yourself more troubles.”

            “It’s what I want to do. I can do this and have enough money to take care of my mom. Meanwhile, I can hopefully get into a ballet company. Then over time, I might make more from dancing.”

            The older man sighed. “I know that I can’t fucking do anything to change your mind. But you need to know that this shit isn’t something you can walk away from. Not a little side job you can drop whenever you want.”

            “I know.”

~~~

            “I used my father’s identity to set it all up. I started to facilitate shipments from Europe to get liquor into Boston and then ship it all over the country. I put any debts in my father’s name and Frank helped me deal with anyone so nothing would be traced back to me.”

            Tommy wasn’t surprised that she had managed to create a bootlegging empire. Kate was certainly clever enough to get the job done. He was just unsure why she hadn’t confessed that to him when they initially met. But he wanted to hear her out so he nodded for her to continue.         

            “I was accepted into the Boston ballet company and began dancing. It became so much easier after that. I started to meet people who were higher up in the city. Rich people, people who wanted things done. Only the wealthiest knew who I really was. Everyone else thought it was my father in control.”

 ~~~

            “That was a beautiful performance, Miss Lynch.”

            “Oh, Mr. Weld,” Kate startled as she left the theatre through the backstage door. “I didn’t see you there.”

            The wealthy businessman was standing by his expensive, neatly polished car parked in the back alley. Mr. Weld was dressed in a tuxedo, demonstrating that he had seen the ballet performance that had just ended.

            “Let me drive you home.” He offered, opening the car door for her.

            “That would be kind, thank you.” Kate had no qualms about getting into his car. She was armed with a pistol and even then she doubted the man would attack her. She was far too valuable.

            “I do appreciate your work, Kathleen but I came here to voice some concerns.” Mr. Weld said as he got into the car and started it up.

            “By all means, tell me what you’re worried about.”

            The man sighed anxiously. “I understand you’ve been branching out to Chicago, selling to their bars. Word is you’ve gathered a few men there who act on your behalf.”

            “I don’t give out names of people I work with,” Kate replied calmly. “What I do in Chicago won’t affect my business with your bars, Mr. Weld. You’ll get shipments and protection as long as I’m paid.”

            “What I’m concerned about is the Chicago Outfit.” He ignored the mild threat. He’d been behind a few times with payments and had learned his lesson early on that it didn’t matter that Kate was a woman. She wasn’t someone to be messed with.

            Kate bit her tongue. The Chicago Outfit was frightening to anyone, but she didn’t show fear. “There’s no reason for concern.”

            “Pardon my insistence, but there’s been word that you’ve…you’ve been disregarding their territory lines. I would urge you to be careful or to even back out of Chicago entirely. The more you press…”

            “What?” She glanced over at him, still conveying that she wasn’t bothered even when her stomach was in knots.

            Mr. Weld’s fingers tapped nervously on the steering wheel. “The more attention you’ll call to yourself. I don’t wish to have any ties to someone who upsets them.”

            “Then pay me what I’m due and our contract will be finished,” Kate replied with a tone of finality. “You can go over to the North End and ask the Italians for help. Because you won’t get any more help from any of my allies.”

            Mr. Weld swallowed. “Just please consider your actions a bit more carefully.” He parked outside of the Lynch’s apartment building.

            “I run my business how I see fit,” Kate said, stepping out of the car. “Let me know if you want to continue our business relationship.” She closed the car door firmly.

~~~            

            “I was making money but not enough to completely stay afloat. , I branched out further to Chicago and made mistakes. I was given a warning but I didn’t listen.”

            Tommy had been in the game long enough to know the consequences of ignoring warnings. “What did they do?”

            “They took a train to Boston and kidnapped my mother. They tortured her for days but she wouldn’t tell them where I was. They ended up throwing her in the river.” Kate tucked her knees to her chest as she stared at the floor with tears in her eyes. The sight of her mother’s body being hauled out of the river would always be etched into her brain. The guilt was so unbearable she tried to pawn it off to someone else. It was the Chicago Outfit’s fault. It was the fault of whoever gave them her mother’s address. It was her father’s fault for leaving them with no income. But in the end, there was no escaping it. Kate knew it was her fault.

            Tommy, although stunned into silence by her history, he instinctually wrapped an arm around her shoulders to comfort her. His actions had led to the death of others. He knew the weight of guilt that would always rest on his soul.

            “That same night I went to Santo. I wanted him to get revenge for me. I only knew him because he left me a letter after one of my performances. He hounded me for weeks about a business relationship and then something personal. I knew he was waiting for me after the news spread about my mother.”

 ~~~

            “My condolences, Miss Lynch.” Santo poured Kate a glass of wine. They were sat together in a secluded booth at one of the North End restaurants Santo owned.

            “Thank you.” She replied quietly. It still hadn’t quite hit that her mother was dead. Yet, there she was, willing to negotiate for revenge.

            “Why is it you wanted to come to see me so soon after your mother passed?” He asked even though there was a twinkle in his eye. A sort of knowing. There was no mystery as to why she was there.

            “Because I need the bastard who killed her to pay. I want him dead.”

            He raised his eyebrows as if he hadn’t even considered that. “And why should I help you? You’ve never proposed an alliance before, why would I risk any of my men to help you? You must know that the Chicago Outfit are dangerous.”

            “Because you’re the only one in Boston who has a feud with them, you would want an opportunity to raise hell, and I would pay you.” Kate knew that talking to gang leaders was never easy. She tended to get right to the bottom line to skip all the fanfare they were so fond of.

            “I’m a wealthy man, Kate, why would I need your money?” He adjusted his cufflinks almost as an example.

            “What else would you want?”

 ~~~

            “That’s where the deal came in. He killed the man who killed my mother. But when the deadline came, I didn’t have enough money. One of my shipments fell through and I lost a lot of money. I begged Santo to give me more time but he refused.”

            Tommy couldn’t help the instinctual anger he felt when Santo’s name was brought up. It only minorly distracted him from the bewildering story Kate was telling him.

            “I left before he could get me and ended up in France.”

            “And that’s where I come in,” Tommy mumbled quietly.

            “Yeah.” Her voice was almost at a whisper. Kate was terrified of what he would say to her.

            But he didn’t speak for a long while. He kept his arm around her, absent-mindedly rubbing her shoulder.

            “Say something, please.” She begged.

            “I don’t know what to say, Kate.” He finally spoke. “I just-I don’t know if it changes anything but I don’t understand. I don’t understand why you didn’t just tell me.”

            Kate felt like breaking down and just curling into a ball. Hardly anyone knew her true story. If she trusted anyone to hear it, Tommy would be high up on that list. But it was still agonizing to open up her old wounds. “Because when I went to France, I vowed to put it all behind me. I didn’t want to be that person again not after what happened to my mother. But then you came into my life and…” She put a hand to her face. “I don’t know I just thought you might be my ticket out.”

            “I don’t understand.”

            “You made me feel safe. And if I had to go back to what I was doing before then I trusted you would be able to keep me safe. Especially if Santo ended up finding me.” She tried to explain as best she could. “But I still wanted to be rid of my past so that’s why I lied. Maybe I just didn’t want to admit what I’d done.”     

            Tommy wasn’t sure what else he could say. Perhaps she had a reason for lying to him. Maybe it was enough that she wanted to put her past behind her. Sometimes, Tommy wished he could just step away from it all and resume a new life. Start off on a clean slate without any debts. But the world didn’t work that way. Kate was now figuring that out.

            “I didn’t think I would fall in love with you. I didn’t even plan on staying in Birmingham that long. I had no problem lying because…your family was just another step in the road. But…then I-I fell in love with you and I just didn’t know how to tell you the truth. The longer I waited, the harder it got.” Weary from all the emotions she’d gone through in those past months, she slumped forward over her knees, holding her hands to her face. “I don’t want to be just another person who lied to you.”

            “C’mere.” He helped her sit upright so he could cradle her in his arms. “What we have is real, aye? It doesn’t have anything to do with what happened in America. The only thing I care about is what happens between us here.”

            Kate buried her face in the crook of his neck. She wanted him to push her away, to look at her with disgust and hatred. She wanted him to hate her for the things she’d done.

            But he held her close and kissed her hair. “It’s done, yeah? You’re coming home, you leave all of it behind.”

            “Tom, I lied to everyone. I put them at risk I-” She couldn’t say it, but she felt worse than Grace. She had lied for longer than Grace had. She had condemned Grace for lying, yet Kate had been lying all along as well.

            “Leave it behind, Kate.” He urged. “You can leave it behind.”

He looked over her shoulder, still processing everything she’d told him. Kate was right, he was blind when it came to the people, he was closest to. So distrustful of the world, but those who had his heart were above suspicion.

            They sat there for a long while, sitting with everything said and just getting used to being in each other’s company again.

            “How is the rest of the family?” Kate asked quietly, finally lifting her head, able to meet his eyes again. “Have they been alright?”

            He took a deep breath. Time for some of his own admission of guilt. “They’re all in prison and they’ve been sentenced to hang.”

//I hope this format was okay to follow. I just didn’t want it to be one huge text block of Kate explaining everything. 

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