#shawn mendes christmas fic

[lonelywhalien22]

ten seconds to midnight

pairing: jungkook x gn reader

rating/genre: second chance, fluff + sprinkle of angst or angst + sprinkle of fluff idk lol

summary: it's new year’s eve and you see your ex jungkook again for the first time since you broke up with him.

warnings: time and location are abstract af in this fic so don’t try to piece together distances or a timeline from anything in this; I wrote it in a more poetic fashion – it’s just a *vibe* if you will lol

word count: 4.6k

song(s) to listen to while reading: tis the damn season by taylor swift, ruin by shawn mendes, new year’s day by taylor swift

note: cleaned this up to share while I edit my next longfic – this is something sweet with a sprinkle of midnight angst. if you happen to enjoy this fic you’ll probably like what I have coming next so stay tuned. happy new year’s everyone and i’ll see you all next year <3

Two years.

It had been two years since you and Jungkook had seen each other for the first time in that art history class – had studied together, hung out together, and eventually dated.

Six months.

It had been six months since you'd left suddenly. Unexpectedly.

Six months since those words were flung like daggers between the two of you, as if you’d been in a competition to see who could hurt the other more – who could prove they were less attached than the other was. Pretending as if all of those late nights, whispered confessions, soothing touches, and sweet kisses had meant nothing.

As if in some sort of war, the two of you had thrown, burned, abandoned, and trashed every last remnant of your relationship, overcompensating to try and prove that none of the feelings were real, that the vulnerability was all a lie, and that you'd actually been keeping your shields up all along.

It's the reason you moved further away than you'd originally planned after you graduated - why you’d signed on to the extra work at your job, the extra responsibilities…you’d even gotten a new phone number, claiming you wanted a completely fresh start.

It's the reason why your brief visit home during the holidays this year just wasn’t the same. Why Jungkook didn’t stop by with the rest of his family to drop off gifts or send cards. Why you no longer saw him at the store he always used to frequent at a specific time, the two of you in charge of picking up whatever your respective families had forgotten for Christmas dinner.

It seemed like you and Jungkook had finally succeeded in creating an irreparable chasm between the two of you.

So instead, you spent your short visit home for the holidays nervously traversing the town that still held memories of him. You pushed your cart through the local grocery store in a near state of paranoia, drove around town with the windows up, let others in the house open the door when you got the usual holiday greetings from family and friends.

You didn't miss him, you told yourself.

Even as you chose to go to his mom's favorite grocery store, or mindlessly drove by some of your old spots from when you two had been together - eagerly looked out the window of your old childhood bedroom whenever you heard the doorbell ring.

You didn't miss him.

Now it was New Year’s Eve, and you currently found yourself outside on a fire escape in the chilly night air, high above a city you were still getting to know, at a party you didn't want to be at, terrified to go back inside.

How exactly had that happened?

Let’s take a few steps back.

The New Year’s Eve party was one put together by some old friends from college you’d reconnected with in the area.

None of them felt particularly close, but after spending last New Year’s Eve alone in your tiny studio apartment guzzling down an entire bottle of champagne and falling asleep before the ball had even dropped, you figured you’d try getting out and doing something in the city you were trying to call home for once.

As you walked into the crowded party space, you immediately scouted out the food and beverages area - your trusty diversion ever since you’d been to your first party as an underclassman in college, terribly shy and fearful of large crowds. You could still remember the moment you’d spotted Jungkook from afar for the very first time in a cramped living room all those years ago - laughing with his friends in a corner, his eyes on you for the tiniest of milliseconds before he went back to sipping whatever was in his red solo cup. It was his hands you’d noticed first, the handful of tiny tattoos scattered across his knuckles. You’d been so surprised when he’d said hello to you in a class one semester later, even more so when he’d smiled easily as he admitted to remembering you, the mural of tattoos on his right hand having spread, two new ones on his index finger and another near his wrist.

Back in the present, you grabbed a few cookies and some water, slowly sipping on your beverage of choice as you resolved yourself to silently watching the party from a distance. You were here – that was progress enough wasn’t it?

"Y/n?" you heard someone shout your name eagerly.

You were surprised since you didn't think you knew anyone at this party all that well, but the friendliness of the voice made you perk up.

Turning your head in the direction of the voice, you recognized the owner as an old friend from back home.

"Changkyun?" you exclaimed, shocked.

You hadn’t seen him in forever. He was so tall and almost athletic in his build now, that you almost didn’t recognize him.

"Hey! Wow, long time no see!" he smiled and immediately pulled you in for a hug. It nearly squeezed the surprise right out of you.

You two began a conversation and caught up, laughing over old memories and how much you’d each changed since last seeing the other before he interjected quickly.

"Now that I think about it, pretty sure I saw someone else you know around here..." he pondered out loud, scanning the crowd before he spotted who he was looking for.

"Oh yeah, Jungkook is here. Hey JK!"  you heard Changkyun quickly shout across the crowd towards the center of the room.

Before you could even fully register the name of your ex you glanced over to where your friend was calling, instantly spotting the back of a familiar head of hair, though it was longer than you remembered, the ends curling slightly from the length.

“J-Jungkook..." you repeated quietly, eyes widening as your brain registered what was happening.

"You good?" Changkyun asked, noticing the change in your expression. "Oh shit, wait - you two were together at some point weren’t you? Did I -"

The rest of his words evaporated into nothing but muffled noise as you watched the head of your ex swivel around, searching for the source of the voice that had called his name. He was still as mesmerizing as ever - those big brown eyes and soft lips. His hair fell into his eyes as he turned, and it made your view of him both painfully nostalgic and exhilarating all at once.

He was gorgeous. Just like you remembered.

You stood frozen, eyes wide in admiration, until Jungkook’s gaze singled in on you and broke you out of your trance. Quickly his eyebrows furrowed in confusion before they lifted up softly upon recognizing you. You watched as he mouthed your name, as if he was asking himself whether or not it was really you. But it was all muddled within seconds as you realized your vision was beginning to blur. Your throat dried up and your head began to pound, and finally you realized you were about to cry.

For some inexplicable reason, you were upset.

"Damnit," you muttered to yourself, looking down, a tear slipping down your cheek against your will.

"Y/n, are you ok?" you heard Changkyun ask beside you, but you only shook your head quickly.

"I…I gotta go," you barely managed to choke out before turning away and pushing through the crowd as fast as you could. You quickly reached the front door and tumbled out, searching for the elevator before instead opting to take the stairs rather than risk standing around for any longer.

After wandering around aimlessly for a couple floors you came upon a shaky fire escape entrance and yanked open the doors, cool air slapping your face like a tide in a storm. It brought goosebumps to your skin - the chill of the night breeze, the cool steel grates that scraped against your thighs as you sat down, the hard brick of the wall against your back, but still - you found yourself grateful for the getaway.

You shimmied to the side so you couldn’t be seen from the glass door entrance and tried to make yourself comfortable in the space that remained, your legs slipping into a makeshift crisscross position. It was ridiculously cramped, and probably not at all safe, but at least it was quiet. The isolation gave you a chance to work through some of your thoughts without interruptions from annoyingly drunk partygoers.

"Why did I come here," you whispered to yourself, frustrated.

You knew how much you hated parties, and yet you'd gone anyways, only to find yourself in the very situation you’d been fearing since the holidays had come upon you – trapped with him just steps away and nowhere to run or hide.

You were terrified to face all the damage you’d left behind in your breakup with Jungkook - the stuffed closet full of baggage and hastily thrown together lies that you knew would all come tumbling down if you ever saw him again.

If you were being honest, you'd been running from this very scenario ever since you’d broken up with him. Because somehow, after all this time, he still wouldn't leave your head - his smile, the sound of his laugh, the way he could be incredibly cute but could also make you completely flustered at the flip of a switch.

The way he’d felt like a best friend, a confidante, and a lover all at the same time. How he’d made you feel so loved in a way only he could.

You had searched for that same feeling in others, from the occasional coworker to the random blind date, but no matter how hard you tried you couldn't get yourself to fall out of love with him. And deep down, you think you always knew it. You'd be lying if you said there wasn't some part of you that saw a piece of him in everything you did and everywhere you went. You just couldn't lie to yourself anymore – not after seeing how you'd reacted from just seconds of seeing him in person again.

You took a few deep breaths, staring out at the lights and bustle of the city as your finger trailed longingly up and down one of the steel bars that separated you from the open air. Funny how the rest of the world just continued to go on, even when it felt like your little corner of it was being shaken to no end like a snow globe in a child’s hands.

But watching all the cars and pedestrians below carrying on with their lives – it also helped you put your worries into perspective - helped you keep calm.

Suddenly, your thoughts were interrupted by the cracking open of the fire escape door.

Please don't be a couple, please don’t be a couple, you thought to yourself. The last thing you needed were some handsy lovebirds interrupting your ruminations and reminding you of your own failures in the relationship department.

"Y/n?" you heard someone whisper softly. "Y/n, you out there?"

You’d recognize that voice anywhere - warm and soothing when it was singing along to a song on the radio, smooth and sweet like caramel when it was directed towards you, and immediately your body tensed.

The voice continued to call your name again and again, and you could hear his footsteps shuffling around closer and closer to you in the dark. Folding into yourself and squeezing your eyes shut, you prayed he didn’t notice you, or maybe he’d think you were some stranger - turn around and leave you out here all alone like you thought you wanted.

The footsteps continued until you heard the door open one last time, someone mumbling something too far away for you to hear before banging it shut again. You figured he didn't see you, deciding to look elsewhere, and your shoulders relaxed again.

"Didn't think I’d see you here," you suddenly heard loud and clear.

"Fuck," you shouted, too spooked to really think about it before your reflexes kicked in and you jumped, quickly turning towards the voice. "I thought I was alone out h-"

As soon as you looked up you saw that it was your ex. He stood feet away, one hand still lingering on the fire escape entrance.

"Jungkook."

You mumbled his name, aggravated as he raised a brow at your rare curse.

Quickly, you angled yourself back towards the view of the skyline, shaking your head profusely as you attempted to make him go away.

"I don't wanna see you."

"Believe me, this wasn't really how I pictured spending my night either," he retorted, and you couldn’t even lie - the words felt like a cold knife straight to your heart.

He took just one tiny step forward, hand falling from the rusted metal handle of the door.

"I couldn't just let you go off crying though."

"I wasn't crying," you spat out. It was your roughest voice yet, but Jungkook didn’t even flinch.

"You're still shit at lying," he said with a smirk instead. "We may not be together anymore, but I can still recognize the face you make when you're about to cry."

You wished he’d elaborate so you could practice never making that face again, but he just stood still, glancing back through the window. It both annoyed the heck out of you and made your heart flutter, knowing he could still read you like that.

He took another few steps towards you. Like a giant, his stature towered over you as he continued to stand, his feet careful not to step on your fingers.

"Anyways, you left this," he suddenly said, a chunk of metal entering your view. It was your phone.

How that happened, you had no idea. You must have placed it on a nearby table as you ate, distracted by you conversation with Changkyun. You grabbed it swiftly, careful not to touch his hand in any way, but you still couldn’t help but notice the decorative ink that now danced all over his fingers, the way his skin reddened in the cold.

Did he notice you still used the phone case he’d bought you for your birthday?

"Thanks," you told him curtly instead, avoiding his gaze.

You kept quiet, expecting him to finally go away now that he’d returned your phone but instead the silence lingered, Jungkook’s feet shuffling awkwardly.

“Come back inside Y/n,” he said, tone gentle, the edges of his jawline softening.

“Why?”

Jungkook looked down, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“Changkyun’s worried about you,” he mumbled eventually. “…and besides, it’s dangerous - sitting out here all alone like that.”

“I’ll be fine. No need to worry about me.”

You could feel his frustration brewing as he looked at you in silent incredulity, a cloudy huff leaving his lips in the night air before you felt him sit right down beside you. His denim-clad knee scraped yours just faintly as he settled into a comfortable position. Together the two of you took up nearly all the space on the tiny ledge.

"You want a drink?" Jungkook offered coolly, a cup of red liquid seemingly appearing out of nowhere.

It was tempting, but you hesitated. After all, you weren’t looking to get inebriated while on a shaky fire escape with your ex nearby to bear witness to some sort of embarrassing, drunken confession of longing. You generally preferred to stay sober anyways.

"It's just cranberry juice,” he told you, as if he could read your mind. “They have a bunch of it to mix with the cocktails."

Fuck.

Not only did he remember how much you hated alcohol, but also that cranberry juice was your favorite?

"You're the only person I've ever met who drinks that stuff," he used to always joke.

Back in the present, you took the cup from his hands, finally looking at him to search his face briefly, but his expression gave nothing away. You took a sip to busy yourself.

A blanket of silence fell between you. It wasn’t awkward or even necessarily tense, but it didn't feel like it was truly quiet either. Instead, it was more like there were a bunch of unsaid words bouncing around between the two of you, trying but failing to break out.

"What're you thinking about?" Jungkook asked innocently, looking down at one of his hands before focusing back on the view of the city skyline.

"Nothing," you shook your head tersely, only to hear the tiniest of hums escape his lips out of disbelief.

"So you're outside all alone, staring at the sky in the freezing cold and nothing's wrong? You sure about that?"

You closed your eyes, more and more memories rushing back to you – like the times Jungkook used to find you alone out on the campus green, just sitting with the palm of your hand pressed against your cheek, pouting as you stared at some point in the clouds. Or how he used to poke you on the nose whenever you laid your head in his lap and stared into space, that same pensive look on your face. His words were always the same every single time.

"What're you thinking about?"

It was beginning to drive you crazy the more you thought about it – how, even after all this time apart, he was still able to pick up on little things like that.

And it made you feel even crazier when you thought about the fact that you still remembered those little things about him too.

Trying to keep yourself from becoming any more affected by his words, you tried a slightly more aggressive approach.

"Well maybe I would be fine if I was actually alone."

But he only turned to face you at that remark, another deep sigh escaping his lips.

"Y/n/n.." he used your nickname this time, and he sounded regretful, like your words had actually stung. "Look, I just wanna make sure you're ok."

"I'm am ok," you said back harshly.

Another bout of silence fell between you at that – this one like a cascade of bricks instead of a gentle blanket.

"Why are you acting like I'm the one who did you wrong?" Jungkook piped up, exasperation inching into his voice.

"Last time I checked, I told you I wanted to be left alone."

"You know that's not what I'm talking about,” he said, undeterred by your attempt to change the subject.

You didn’t respond immediately, not ready to talk about your breakup out in the open.

You weren’t sure you'd ever be ready.

"I told you I wanted to experience other places…" you started after a minute or so, quieter than expected. "You know I never wanted to stay so close to home."

"And I get that, but one week?" Jungkook asked incredulously. "How could you only tell me a week before you left? I thought I meant more to you than that."

You huffed out loud in frustration, unsure how to respond.

It was true - you did tell Jungkook about your big move only seven days before you left. You did it out of fear.

Because you were scared.

You and Jungkook had gotten so close after only two years, and you’d never felt that way about a person before - you’d never felt in love.

It scared you - especially when you thought that maybe you were just getting too attached, too quickly.

If there was one thing you hated, it was dependency. Needing someone else felt like an indefensible weakness, and you were afraid that being with him, needing him, would only hold you back.

All you’d wanted was some space to cool off and clear your head - evaluate how you felt from a distance in solitude, like you always did when you felt overwhelmed by your emotions. When you finally did tell Jungkook about the move, you were hoping you two would just dial things down a little - keep in touch remotely while you took some time to think about your life post-graduation.

But instead, the whole thing had turned into one big shouting match.

Hurtful words had been thrown like weapons on both sides, and by the time the dust had settled, you were driving hundreds of miles away.

You’d ignored his calls, deleted his texts, and even refused to listen to appeals from your mother, who still kept in touch with his family. Distancing yourself away from him had only made your worst fears become a reality, and in turn made it even easier to run away from it all rather than confront your fears head on.

Avoidance was the only way you knew how to approach things that were hard - uncomfortable.

And maybe that's why you were sitting here on this damn fire escape in the first place.

"I just wanted some space," you defended yourself.

"But so suddenly? Was there something I did wrong?" he asked you dejectedly.

You turned to look Jungkook in his eyes, and behind his seemingly calm face you could see real pain. You really had hurt him, and in that moment you wished you could tell him the truth – that he hadn't done anything wrong. He'd done everything right, but you just hadn't known how to deal with the intensity of your feelings.

"Did you really have to change your number? Pretend like I didn't even exist?" Jungkook spoke up again.

"That's not fair," you shook your head. "You really hurt me with your words when I finally did tell you."

"Because you broke my heart," he exclaimed, getting visibly upset. "You told me you never loved me - that all of those memories, all those moments we shared...” he looked down for a moment. “You said none of it mattered. That I’d ‘taken it the wrong way.’"

"I didn't mean any of that," you blurted out loud.

"That's what I told myself," Jungkook started, "but what was I supposed to think when you completely cut me out of your life?"

You sniffled silently, unable to come up with any more excuses.

Simply put, you’d both really hurt each other.

As you focused back on all the lights down below, legs beginning to cramp, you felt a curtain of warmth envelop your shoulders.

Jungkook had draped his denim jacket across your body. You couldn’t help but fixate on how the fabric was soft and worn, and it smelled just like him - that same combo of body wash and cologne that you still couldn’t erase from your memory.

"Are you two dating?" you heard him ask quietly.

"What?" you asked, confused before putting two and two together. "Me and Changkyun? No…"

The question took you aback. What did it matter to him anyways?

"I came alone and ran into him unexpectedly," you explained further. "Why are you here?"

"An old classmate invited me," he told you casually, contemplating his next words for a moment before continuing. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't hoping that maybe I'd see you though..."

You felt your heartbeat quicken at the casual admission, but you didn’t have much time to think about what it meant as he smoothly moved on.

"What about you? I thought you hated parties."

You sighed, hesitant to be so honest but feeling a strange sense of courage regardless.

"Well normally I do, but last New Year’s just...wasn’t all that great," you started.

"How so?"

You took a deep breath before continuing, counting off the reasons on your fingers. "Well, I was alone. And it sucked. I didn't even make it to midnight before I just fell asleep. So I decided this year I'd try going out instead."

"And how's it going?" Jungkook asked, the tiniest hint of a twinkle in his eye. “Tonight, I mean.”

Was he flirting with you right now?

"Not sure yet…" you played along, "but I'm still awake so that's a plus."

Again you sat quietly for a few minutes, neither of you making a move, not a single word shared between the two of you. This time the silence was comforting. You became hyper aware of his knee brushing against your own, and your insides felt so warm that suddenly the cold air didn’t faze you at all.

Maybe, just maybe…

Your quiet stalemate was interrupted when the fire escape door slammed open and the sound of drunken giggles grew louder and louder, a shaggy head of hair sticking itself outside to ogle at the two of you.

"Oh, shoot, looks like this one's taken babe," the random guy shouted in a slurred voice.

"Well hurry up and find somewhere else, I can't wait any loooonger," some poor girl whined, just as tipsy.

They disappeared as quickly as they came, the door shutting with a bang, and you and Jungkook couldn't help but burst out into laughter.

"Was their plan to screw each other on the balcony?" you heard him utter your exact thoughts aloud. Not so innocent memories crept into your mind for a split second before you squashed them.

He's still your ex, you reminded yourself.

"Not sure,” you said instead with a chuckle, “but it certainly looks like we’ve reached that point in the evening where I typically remove myself from the situation."

You pulled your phone out to check the time. "It's midnight,” you realized.

You two had been out there together for over half an hour.

"Guess that means it's time to go, huh?" you heard him ask.

"Yeah…"

Neither of you moved to get up though.

You weren’t expecting to still be with Jungkook at this point, and suddenly you were unsure of what to do. How did one say goodbye to an ex?

How did you say goodbye when you didn't want to?

"Y/n?" Jungkook said your name, pulling you out of your thoughts. You looked at him with bated breath, urging him to continue as fireworks began to go off in the distance.

"Um…" he stalled, clearly trying to find the right thing to say next.

Hating the silence, you improvised, taking off his jacket to give back. The warmth that previously enveloped you disappeared immediately, and it left you feeling strangely empty.

"Here, let me give you back your jacket before I forget."

"Oh…yeah, thanks," he said, a hint of sadness in his voice.

As he leaned over to grab it, you quickly kissed his cheek before backing away and looking down, brushing the hair out of your face.

"Sorry if that was weird," you started, "but I just…wanted to apologize. For everything I put you through back then."

To your surprise, Jungkook shifted a little closer to you, lips pulled into a soft smile as he shook his head. "You don't deserve all the blame. We both said things we shouldn't have, and I'm sorry too."

Butterflies burst free in your belly, and the fireworks that lit up the sky seemed to form a faint outline around Jungkook’s head as he stared at you, eyes boring into your own, keeping you frozen in place.

His hand slipped into yours lightly, and you looked at them for a split second, fingers intertwined in warmth as he spoke. Slowly but surely, you felt yourself drawn towards him in a familiar lure, like a moth to a flame.

Like a wanderer finding their way back home.

"Any chance we could just pretend like it's ten seconds to midnight again?" you asked shyly, and he instantly cracked the biggest smile you’d seen from him all night.

Jungkook said nothing, instead leaning in to kiss you gently.

[allwaswell16]

All the One Direction fics I read and enjoyed in November 2023. You can listen to my podcast to hear me talk about each of these fics as well as an overview of what was posted on ao3 including the fics on this month’s fic roundup which you can find here! Please let the writers know if you liked the fics by leaving kudos and comments! Happy reading!

Fanfictional Podcast #56 |  ko-fi | fic recs

- Louis/Harry -

🍂 Train Tracks and Porcelain by @jaerie

(E, 41k, historical circus au) Shadows were forming into people and things and, there in the middle of it, Louis watched the humongous head of an elephant emerge from a box car right in front of his eyes. Or a Water For Elephants inspired AU

🍂 Big, Bright World by RealName

(M, 35k, office au) Every day, Louis' feelings became more intense, more immediate, each little smile and gesture and silly flirtation mounting up into something palpable, with a life of its own. The only problem? Harry was engaged to someone else and had been from the moment Louis started working at Visionary.

🍂 two feet standing on a principle by Anonymous

(E, 10k, exes) Harry is a famous fashion model and Louis works at the mall, nobody knows they broke up two weeks ago.

🍂 you make my whole world feel so right when it's wrong by orphan_account

(T, 6k, mpreg Harry) Harry is pregnant and stops at the mall to buy cheap baby clothes. Louis has extra money from working a long shift, and he can't think of a better way to spend it than on him.

🍂 make my wish come true by deblond / @braveryandtea

(T, 4k, Christmas) Louis works as Santa’s elf at the mall. He meets Harry.

- Rare Pairs -

🍂 take me back, take me back by eynap / @panye

(E, 32k, Niall/Shawn Mendes) Niall invites his new friend Shawn to Zayn and Liam's three-day wedding in Napa Valley, California. He gets way more than he expected.

🍂 must be love by @nouies

(NR, 6k, Louis/Andrew Garfield) AU where Louis doesn’t know how to approach his neighbour, and Andrew keeps receiving homegrown vegetables at his door.

🍂 lonely in [paris] by f_ckromeoandjuliet / @louiesonlyangel

(T, 5k, Louis/Awsten Knight) Alternate version of Louis's tour where he's in a secret relationship with Awsten Knight from Waterparks. Based on Awsten tweeting at Louis.

🍂 Feeling Feline by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13

(T, 4k, Louis/Niall) “Not medically wrong,” the blond one says. “But I swear, and I know this sounds nuts, but I don’t think he’s a cat?”

🍂 it's the summer of our love by localopa / @voulezloux

(G, 3k, Louis/Ryan Ross) ryan is in love with his best friend and gym bro, louis. the problem? ryan is straight.

🍂 Got My Chaos Automatic by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28

(E, 3k, Zayn/Louis/Liam) the one where Louis comes home from tour feeling exhausted, yet antsy. Luckily, Liam and Zayn are there to put him back together

🍂 Crush by @allwaswell16

(T, 1k, Louis/Niall) When Niall stops smiling around the office, his co-worker Louis sets out to lift his mood with the help of their office mates.

- Trick Or Treat Fest -

1D Trick Or Treat Fest / @1dtrickortreatfest (each 666 words)

she bit someone by larry_hiatus / @larry-hiatus

Sounds horrifying..... tell me more by @lunaticcat009

In The Dark by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13

Ghosted by @haztobegood

Summon A Demon by red_panda28 / @red-pandaaa

Slow Dance with the Tension by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28

I See You by @neondiamond

Lipstick stain fades with time by @lunarheslwt

Watch How Good I'll Fake It by mmaree / @zqua1d

Irresistible by mmaree / @zqua1d

find a way (to send me a sign) by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

when love gets involved by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

Harryween (series) by @babyhoneyheslt

Fruit Bat by yeah_alright / @uhoh-but-yeah-alright

Odds Are That We Will Probably Be... by @lululawrence

A Witch's Longest Day of the Year by 4ureyesonly28 / @evilovesyou

pasta-tively sweet by shiptattou / @wecantalktomorrow

perfect pumpkins by shiptattou / @wecantalktomorrow

Fa-boo-lous Halloween by bluegreenish / @greenblueish

Still by downcamethelightning / @downcamethelightnings

[linkles-art-blog]

Brand-new artwork for Chapter 9 of Cherish, my beloved fic. 🥺💕This is the fourth main artwork for the fic that I’ve made chronologically, and I think only one of two (including Chapter 4′s) that I’ve ever managed to finished on time to release it with the new chapter. lol

Chapter 9 will be releasing very shortly after this artwork is posted, so please look forward to that, and be sure to consider giving my Cherish blog a follow if you want to keep completely up to date with Cherish news and content without anything else being posted in between. ^-^

As you can tell, I definitely gave in to my desire to use the Holiday 2022 artwork’s crayon-like coloring style for this one. I don’t have any regrets, though; it’s a ton of fun to play with and I’m very proud of the result. You might see some other Cherish artworks of mine using this style in the future. Or maybe not. Who can say? :)

Do not repost this artwork anywhere without my explicit permission or claim it as your own. See F.A.Q.s for details. Songs I listened to while drawing this:

My Cherish Playlist (the public and currently only partial version of which you can listen to here.) Most specifically of all though, the chapter’s namesake, come out and play by Billie Eilish.

Top of the World — Shawn Mendes

Michael Bublé - Christmas (Deluxe Album) (and most specifically Cold December Night).

Iris — Goo Goo Dolls

(And mostly unrelated to the vibe but I listened to this too)

When Someone Stops Loving You — Little Big Town

[smthabsolutelyunhinged]

~ INTRODUCTION ~

HI MY LOVES, IM EMI <3

she/her. pansexual. cisfem. pisces sun. cancer moon. white. american. INFP. 4w5. hufflepuff. marauders stan. james potter + remus lupin + pandora rosier kinnie. aspiring writer/author. artist. bookworm. music lover. halloween enthusiast. broadway lover. massive fan of anything whimsy/gothic/romantic/etc. at some point i might link my spotify/pintrest, but idk yet.

IMPORTANT INFO UNDER THE CUT <3

*i am a minor (17), but i do interact with nsfw content at my own discretion. i am perfectly ok with asks/requests for nsfw headcanons—or thoughts about existing nsfw headcanons—for characters from my fandoms (please understand that while i allow them, i might choose not to answer them based on my own comfort levels at the time of receiving them). HOWEVER as of this moment, i do not actively write smut/nsfw one shots, fan fics, drabbles, etc.*

[any of this can change at any point and i will make it known if it does, but for the time being i do ask that any nsfw requests be for headcanons/thoughts about hcs only].

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

please do ~ dm me (please i’ll literally marry you idc, also talk to me i’m cool), asks, anonymous asks, reblog (obviously), comment, like, send me random thoughts/ideas/headcanons/music recs, interact with me in any way that isn’t like hateful/gross/weird (i’ll cry. dont do it. i’ll cry and it’ll be your fault.) {flirting is allowed tho - i’ll flirt back and then marry you, again idc‼️} also moots and anons are allowed (please do) to come up with other nicknames/use petnames/etc {i like them, i’m a chronically depressed, anxious, words of affirmation girlie with family issues, and i like the validation :)}.

please don’t ~ be weird, hateful, creepy, or gross in any way because i will block you immediately, (and release my scary, aggressive, friend *cough cough ace cough cough* on you, and they will bite you (not in a hot and sexy way either)).

<3 shows ~

the vampire diaries. criminal minds. one tree hill. the originals. outer banks. the 100. gilmore girls. supernatural. heartstopper. boy meets world. downton abbey. chesapeake shores. daisy jones and the six.

<3 movies ~

pretty woman. mystic pizza. twister (1996). little women (1994/2019). hocus pocus. princess and the frog. the harry potter movies. the hunger games. divergent. twilight. coraline. the nightmare before christmas. notting hill. two weeks notice. a cinderella story (2001). the princess diaries. scream (the og trilogy). st elmos fire. the dark knight. pride and predjudice (2005). the many adventures of winnie the pooh. titanic. five feet apart. pirates of the carribean. captain america: civil war. avengers: infinity war. sense and sensibility. the addams family. the family man.

<3 books ~

daisy jones and the six. the harry potter series. the inheritance games trilogy. shatter me. frankenstein. the picture of dorian grey. warrior cats. tales from redwall series. the hunger games trilogy. divergent trilogy. the twilight saga. the chronicles of narnia. the land of stories. the cheerleaders.

<3 other fandoms & music ~

marauders, one direction, harry styles, taylor swift, sabrina carpenter, lana del rey, ethel cain, michael jackson, hozier, noah kahan, abba, fleetwood mac, chappel roan, olivia rodrigo, daisy jones and the six, the weeknd, childish gambino, shawn mendes, jonas brothers, guns and roses, birdy, etc.. (i can almost always find something to like about music- so i listen to a lot of it aside from whats listed)…

<3 tags ~ i might not have actually added these yet :)

#emi thinks - headcanons, fandom thoughts, and fandom ideas

#emi rants - rants and rambles about any and everything

#emi writes - anything i write even tho i havent posted any yet

#emiasks - questions for you guys, questions to the void, anything of that vibe

#emithirsts - me simping over people that don’t exist, being thirsty on the main, that’s it-

#my loves - asks, anons, etc

#gayfroggie<3 - noni’s tag

*there will be individual tags for moots if you want them, so just pick/ask for one, and i’ll assign them <333*

*i currently don’t have any specified anons ~ all emojis are available so if you want to be one just ask :)*

<3 moots ~ i’ll add more as i get them >:)

@xaviisconfused @dilutedmayowater @therewasnofloorbtw @aesthetic-writer18 @crybabygh0sty @noh07

[softboywriting]

Christmas Kiss | Shawn Mendes

Summary: You and Shawn have been friends since you were kids. You never meant to fall in love with him, his life and job now make a relationship hard. This Christmas you decide to tell him how you feel, there is only one problem, you’re sick with a cold and you don’t think you’ll get to see him. [fluff] [Christmas themed] [sick/cold] [non au] [friends to lovers]

Word Count: 2.6k

|Masterlist In Bio|

Being sick when Shawn comes home from tour for Christmas is not ideal. You felt the cold coming on two days before he was scheduled to land in Toronto. You had plans, big plans with Shawn. It's been ages since he's been able to hang out in person, and you finally have the courage to admit to him that you want to be more than friends. This week was supposed to be a huge life changing event, a Christmas to remember. You did everything you could to stop the onslaught of runny nose and puffy watery eyes; medicine, orange juice, supplements, but to no avail. You are undoubtedly, irrevocably, sick.

Monday morning you wake up to the doorbell for your apartment buzzing non stop. The world feels heavy. You sit up in slow motion it seems and there is nothing you can do but focus on breathing for a moment while you gain your bearings and listen to that awful tinny buzzing from someone wanting into your building. You crawl out of bed and drag yourself to the door, dragging your feet like they're in sticky mud.

"Hello?" You ask, finger on the call button for the front door. Your voice is completely wrecked, absolutely destroyed from coughing. "Hello? Anybody there?"

"It's Shawn."

"Shawn?" You glance at the clock over your couch a few feet away. It's just after nine. "What're you doing here?"

"I got you some stuff. Let me in, it's cold out here." He laughs and you press the door button to let him in.

Moments later he is pushing open the door to your apartment and carrying in bags of stuff. You wrap a blanket off the couch around your shoulders and watch as he unloads bag after bag onto your kitchen island.

"What's this?"

"Medicine, food, gifts." Shawn starts unpacking and setting aside Oreos and some ramen cups. "I stopped by the store for you on my way over with your Christmas gifts."

You shuffle forward and look at the bags. They're full of more groceries than you would usually buy in two weeks. How much does the guy think you eat? And what is with all the junk food? You tug the corner of a bag down and see a bottle of whiskey. "What's this?" You pull out a fifth of Canadian whiskey and give Shawn a look.

"That's for us." He puts away the Oreos and some mac and cheese into a cupboard. "Hot toddies are good for making you sweat out a cold."

"Uh huh. You said “us”? You're not staying."

"The hell I’m not."

"Shawn, you can't get sick. You're a rockstar, you have to sing. You...you have responsibilities."

"Yeah and right now," he pauses and hands you a box of tissues. "My responsibility is my best friend."

Best friend. That packs a punch you didn't expect. A haunting reminder of how he thinks of you, at least, how he presents that he thinks of you. It's hard and it's getting harder, that courage you built up the last few months is withering now like ice  in the hot sun. It's just turning to steam before your very eyes. Shit.

"What if you get sick?"

"So what? I've been sick before and I'll be sick again." Shawn wads up the last of the grocery bags and sets aside a bunch of wrapped boxes on the counter. "I've waited four months to be here and to see you. I'm not letting some stupid runny nose stop me."

"I'm not going to be any fun." You sniff, eyes watering heavily. "I'm just going to sleep and be miserable."

Shawn rolls his eyes. "I know you. You'll want to watch Lion King and drink peppermint tea until you're so tired you pass out. I'm prepared for that."

"Wow. Just read me like a book why don't you?"

He grins. "Go sit down. I'll make some tea and we'll talk and catch up."

"We talk everyday."

"But it's different when we're together."

"Yeah but..." You chew on your lip and he lays his hand on your shoulder. "Never mind. Thank you for coming over."

"You'd do the same for me." He cups your cheek and you turn your eyes up at him, sure that you must look terrible. "You're welcome."

His soft gaze breaks you. You step forward and wrap your arms around him, pressing your face to his chest. Your fingers curl tight into his shirt and he holds your head with both hands.

"I missed you," he says, fingers working into your hair and scratching at your scalp with his blunt fingertips. "Things aren't the same without you."

"I missed you too." You murmur, eyes closed and you can almost, just barely, smell his cologne. Maybe your one nostril is unblocked. Maybe...just maybe you just want to be immersed in that familiar scent so bad it's appearing in your mind.

_____________________

Shawn spends the rest of the day with you. He makes you tea and warm whiskey spiked drinks. You watch the Lion King, Mulan and Moana. Just after six the sun starts to slip behind the horizon, your living room becoming dark. Shawn's arm finds its way around your shoulders and he leans his head on your head. You want to tell him. You need to tell him how you feel.

"Tomorrow is Christmas."

You nod slightly. "Sure is."

"My parents are in Barbados." Shawn chuckles. "It was a gift for their anniversary, but the cruise got rescheduled. I was surprised when they said they'd be gone for Christmas. It's not like mom to miss it."

"Maybe they just really needed a vacation."

Shawn sits up and runs a hand over his unruly long hair. "Probably. I know mom's been having a hell of a time finding clients for work. And dad...dad is always working hard, a hundred and fifty percent everyday." He sighs. "I'm glad they taught me a good work ethic y'know, but I wish they'd take it easy. It's not like it was when Aaliyah and I were kids. They don't have to try so hard."

You lay your hand on Shawn's and he turns it over, threading his fingers between yours and rubbing absentmindedly with his thumb. "I suppose parents always want to provide for their kids, even if they are rockstars." You giggle and he gives you a look.

He hates when you call him rockstar. He says it feels like it cheapens things, makes you less than him. He doesn't want you to think of him as a rockstar but as your best friend.

"Are you parents flying in for the holiday?"

You shake your head. "No, they couldn't afford it this year."

"Why'd they move to Florida again?"

"Mom wanted to live on the beach." You roll your eyes and he squeezes your hand. "Dad also got a job down there with the construction company he works for."

"Ah. So, do you want to spend Christmas together?"

"I figured that was the plan." You look to the window where it's snowing heavily outside. "I didn't think you'd want to drive home across Toronto in this weather."

"I don't." Shawn pulls his hand away to brush his hair back with it while he reaches for his drink. "I don't mind taking the couch."

"You know what you need?" You say, getting up and going over to the kitchen. You grab a few hair ties out of the bowl that holds your keys. "These."

"Ponytails?"

"Yeah. Your hair is ridiculous and you keep pushing it out of your face every two minutes." You stand in front of him and he leans forward for you. Skillfully you gather up the top of his hair into two little pig tails on the top of his head. He looks outrageous and you can't help the ugly laugh that burbles out.

"I look stupid don't I?" Shawn asks, half laughing at your reaction. He stands and looks in the decorative mirror beside the TV. "Ohmygod. This is my new look." He turns to look at you where you've collapsed on the couch laughing and struggling to breath through your clogged nose. "Goodbye headbands, hello pigtails."

"Stop! Shawn I'm gonna die!"

"Nope. You did this." He poses, peace sign over his face while making duck lips. "High fashion baby."

You start coughing, laughter quickly succumbing to a wheezing fit and hacking. You down the rest of your tea, just warm from sitting on the table too long, and take a few deep breaths.

Shawn drops to his knees beside you, hand on your chest. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I made you laugh too hard, I'm so sorry. What can I do? How do I help?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine." You cough a few more times and grab Shawn's mug, downing his drink. "I just laughed too hard. It's alright. I'm okay, just a little tired now."

"Come on, let's settle back down on the couch." Shawn grabs your arms and sits you up right on the sofa. "I'll grab some extra blankets and we'll sleep out here."

"But-"

"No buts. I'll be right back."

You close your eyes and lean your head back on the cushions. You're dying. Sickness is wreaking havoc on your body. Shawn's wreaking havoc on your heart, and you're absolutely destroying your mental capacity with liquor and cough medicine. You can't wait. You have to tell Shawn. It's now or never. Balls to the wall. You just have to-

"Are you okay?" Shawn's voice breaks through your thoughts and you open your eyes. "You look a little out of it."

"I love you."

"I love you too?" He says sinking down on the couch and flopping the blankets he was carrying over your lap. "What's with the sudden affection?"

"No, I mean-" You hold your head as it throbs. Maybe whiskey and NyQuil don't mix. In fact, you know they don't. "I am in love with you."

"I know."

"W-what?"

Shawn brushes your hair back off your clammy face and looks at you with those soft hazel brown eyes you adore. "I've known for a long time.”

“I-I Wha-”

“It's okay, don’t panic. I'm in love with you too. I know I always said that when the time comes I'll know, and I can't pinpoint the moment it happened but one day I woke up and I realized my whole world is waiting for me in a tiny apartment in Toronto." He chuckles. "I've been working on a way to tell you, a way to make it work with my job. I haven't found that way yet, and I hoped you would wait for me, though I didn't expect that. So I never told you. I couldn't- I won't hurt someone like that, especially not you."

"I-I don't know what to say." You stare at him, unsure of your reality as your head swims. Is this real? Did you fall asleep? Are you in some kind of cold medicine induced mini coma? "I'm asleep aren’t I?"

"You're not." Shawn presses his hand to your forehead. "You've got a fever though."

"This isn't real. You're not even here. I'm going crazy." You slump over and Shawn covers you with blankets. "I'm just coping aren't I? Stressed myself out so far that I'm dreaming of telling you the truth."

"You're awfully self aware for a dream."

"That's just what dream Shawn would say."

He chuckles. "I'm getting you some Advil. Relax and I'll be right back with a very real glass of water and two very real pain relievers."

You close your eyes once more and quickly you begin to drift off to sleep. You vaguely remember Shawn sitting your head up to take the Advil and water. But after that everything is a blur of sleep and muddled nonsense dreams.

_____________________

Christmas morning you wake up on the couch. Your body is stiff, achy from sickness and the unsupportive couch cushions. Beside you is a glass of water and some cold medicine on the coffee table. There is a lump of blankets by the other end of the couch and you can see a mop of hair sticking out, two pigtails very visible.

Then reality hits you. If you're waking up now with Shawn asleep in your living room that means last night was very real. It means...you confessed your feelings and Shawn, well, he confessed them back. Excitement, hope and terror are quite a cocktail of emotions. They make your stomach lurch, your heart flutter and your hands shake. What happens now? Where do things go from here?

"Hey," Shawn's groans, peeking over his blankets at you. "How's the fever?"

"Good? I think? I just woke up."

"Mmm." He sits up and stretches. "It's Christmas."

"Yeah." You look over to the tree in the corner where there are boxes from your parents, your sister and Shawn all waiting to be unwrapped. "I can wait though."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to be the only one to unwrap gifts."

Shawn laughs and grabs a few of the boxes from under the tree. "I brought my gifts too, the ones my parents and Aaliyah left for me at my apartment."

"Oh. I thought you brought all of those for me, I thought it was a lot but I didn't want to say anything."

"No." Shawn passes you a box with your name on it. "You definitely deserve this many, but I didn't go crazy."

"You've been crazy." You smile and he gives you a look that turns into a smirk. "Did...did you mean what you said last night?"

"Every word of it." Shawn sits across from you on the couch with his box in his lap. He picks at the paper a bit. "It's okay, like if you don't want to do anything right now. I know my life is insane and yours isn't anywhere near as hectic." He chews his lower lip. "I couldn't ever ask you to commit to my life and the distance and-"

"Shawn."

"Yes?"

"We'll figure it out."

His eyes light up and he stares at you, seemingly bewildered. "You want to try? You want to be in a relationship? With me? I-I'm- you're sure?"

"Shawn I haven't wanted anything more in the last year. We already make the distance work as friends. What's the difference in doing it as a couple?" You sniff and wipe your eyes that are watering from your clogged sinuses. "I think the distance has only made us stronger friends and-"

Shawn leans in to kiss you, hands on your legs and you stop him at the last second with your fingers against his lips. "Please?" he murmurs.

"You're so dumb."

"Because I'm going to kissing you and you're sick?"

"Yes."

He grins and grabs your face, pressing his forehead against yours. "I guess we'll just have to be the couple that shares everything."

"This is not what that means."

"I don't care." He tries to kiss you again and you groan, stopping him. "Shawn, you're gonna get sick."

"I don't care." Another attempted kiss. "I've waited a long time for this."

You cup his face and push him back a bit so he will stop trying to infect himself. “I have too but I'm not going to kiss you and get you sick. And when you've got this cold I will not kiss you then either."

"Yeah you will. Don't lie."

"I won't." You giggle and he pushes forward, leaning you back until you're laying against the arm of the couch with his body covering yours. "Is this for real?"

"Very real." He kisses your nose. "I don't want to wait." He kisses your head. "I've been alone for a long while this feels...it feels so right. Please let me kiss you."

"Alright." You close your eyes and he presses his lips to yours. It's soft, sweet and everything you ever imagined. "Happy?"

"Yes," he whispers, smiling against your lips. "Merry Christmas darling."

You giggle at the pet name. He knows it's one of your favourites. "Merry Christmas Shawn."

End

______________________

Thank you for reading! Please reblog if you enjoyed this and reblog to support and encourage myself and fellow writers. - A

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

[tbyfandoms]

White Christmas | Shawn Mendes x Reader

Pairing: shawn mendes x f!reader

Word Count: 5.7k

Summary: in preparation for christmas eve dinner with shawn’s family, y/n makes her famous christmas cookies. when shawn offers to help it leads to a mix of ingredients y/n wasn’t quite expecting and a night full of memories

Warnings: swearing

Masterlist | Ask/Tell/Request

A/N: hi everyone! i wanted to write this story in honor of @watchmegetobsessed ‘s #fanficmas2021! i’ll be using the prompt “when i said i want a white christmas, this wasn’t what i had in mind.” i read that prompt and immediately thought of this idea so i hope you all like it as much as i do and it gets you into a festive holiday spirit! the execution of the plot and ending probably could’ve been better, but i’m still proud of it and think it’s sickeningly cute. finally, merry christmas eve, i hope you all have a wonderful holiday (if you celebrate), and that it’s full of so much love and happiness <3. enjoy the story and lmk what you think! :)

The smell of holiday candles wafted through the air as you made your way through the living room. What was it; cinnamon? Nutmeg? Some sort of spice only found in candles during the holidays? Whatever it is, it’s wonderful and making the condo feel and smell warm and cozy.

Shawn always went a little overboard with the candles he placed around the condo, but you loved it, loved the way it made him so happy and relaxed. Considering all he goes through, you figure the least this man deserves is a space where he feels safe and at ease. Even if that does mean spending fifteen minutes trying to light a bunch of Christmas candles.

As you put away the lighter you had been using, Shawn walks out from the bedroom and makes his way into the kitchen with you. You smile at the sight of him; red sweater, jeans, fluffy hair, and eyes sparkling from the city lights outside mixed with the holiday ones strung up around your home. A perfect sight you could say.

“Hey, baby, how’s it going?” Shawn asks as he makes his way over to you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders.

“Good, I just finished lighting the fifty candles you have out,” you tease. Shawn groans and nuzzles his nose into the top of your head.

“Whatever, you know you love them,” he hums. “They make all the decorations come together. It’s one thing to see the holiday spirit, but it’s another to smell it in the air as well.”

“I’m going to have to agree with you on that one, Mendes,” you reply.

Turning slightly in Shawn’s arms, you gaze around the condo, taking in the sight of everything. It all looks so beautiful, and Shawn isn’t wrong about the candles helping to really tie everything in. It really feels like being in a winter wonderland when you step inside the front door.

You and Shawn had decided to go all out this year. After everything that happened last year with the height of the pandemic and not being able to have the Christmas you all hoped for, you decided this year you’d do everything you could to make it as best as possible. Shawn’s family was coming over for Christmas Eve dinner and the both of you couldn’t be more excited. Family gatherings were far and few between with all the constant restrictions and fears of getting sick, so being able to finally spend this time together is really all you could ask for.

Shawn’s family would be here soon, so you’re just making all the finishing touches. You and Shawn had somehow put together a wonderful meal, all your favorites and then some. It was a miracle considering when you and Shawn are together in the kitchen, there’s always some sort of disaster. The two of you have too much fun and constantly lose track of time, leading to burnt dishes or forgotten ingredients. It truly is a Christmas miracle the food made it’s way from the kitchen to the dining area without a hitch.

“Is there anything left to do?” Shawn questions, unwrapping his arms from around you.

“Just one more thing,” you reply before opening up a few cabinets. “The Christmas cookies!”

“Ooo that’s right! Your famous Christmas cookies,” he chuckles as he watches you get all the ingredients you need.

“I don’t know if I would count the recipe I found online and have used the past four years as famous, but okay,” you giggle, setting out measuring cups and mixing bowls.

“According to Aaliyah they are. I swear she’s brought them up more times than I can count this past week,” Shawn says, shaking his head. “She’s so excited for them considering she wasn’t able to get some last year.”

“Well i’ll have to make her extra to take home. I couldn’t possibly let my favorite girl go without them any longer, now could I?” Shawn rolls his eyes while you laugh. The bond you and Aaliyah have is special, and you’re grateful to be able to connect with Shawn’s family so well.

“I guess not,” Shawn replies. He looks around at everything you’ve placed on the kitchen island and he reaches out to pick up a few of the cookie cutters you set out. “Do you want some help making them?”

You turn around and face Shawn, staring at him curiously.

“You wanna help me make the cookies?”

“Yeah! You’ve always made them on your own and I think it’d be fun if we did it together this time. I wanna continue to make as many memories with you as possible,” Shawn smiles fondly at you and you can’t help the fluttering of your heart as you take in his statement. He really is the sweetest guy in the world.

“Of course you can help me, love. Thank you for offering,” you say as you make your way over to Shawn and plant a small kiss on his cheek.

Taking his hand, you lead Shawn over to the other side of the kitchen island where all the materials are laid out. Shawn picks up some of the measuring cups and turns to face you.

"Where do I start?" He questions. You smile and push a couple of different ingredients towards Shawn, thinking of the perfect job for him.

"Since I make the cookies from scratch, how about I read off the recipe and you help me measure out the different ingredients," you say. Shawn nods his head and begins to open up the bags of flour and sugar.

"Alright, sounds good. Let's do this!" he exclaims.

Watching as Shawn starts to separate all of the measuring cups, ready and waiting for your instructions, you scoot a little closer to him.

"Hey if you do good I might even let you lick the spoon when we're done with it," you tease, nibbling on your bottom lip to try and stifle your laugh.

"Hmm, sounds intriguing," Shawn hums, tilting his head so his lips graze against your ear. "But I think I'd like something a little sweeter."

As you feel your cheeks heat up, Shawn moves his head away from your ear and brings his lips down onto yours. Even though Shawn made you flustered, you're able to revel in the taste of him, kissing back immediately.

After a minute Shawn pulls back and your eyes flutter open, you’re left feeling like you’re floating. No matter how many times it happens, every kiss with Shawn still feels like your first in the best way possible.

“So, shall we?” The tiniest of smirks pulls at the corner of Shawn’s lips as he tilts his head towards you, finding humor in the fact he can still sweep you off your feet.

“Absolutely,” you reply, shaking out of you lovesick trance. God this man has such a hold on you. You love him nonetheless.

Rummaging through the pile of ingredients, you find the recipe and begin baking with your boyfriend, ready to make more of those Christmas memories with him.

*****

“Baby it’s cold outside!” You and Shawn finish off the song as best you can, your harmonies not quite matching up together, but it’s perfect to you both anyways.

Shawn suggested turning on the music about halfway through the cookie preparation, after you both had really started getting into things. You thought that was a great idea and you’ve been singing different holiday songs ever since. Your favorite had been the one just before Baby It’s Cold Outside, it was All I Want For Christmas Is You by Mariah Carey. You and Shawn had been trying to hit the high notes but every time you would both start laughing while you danced around the kitchen. It was a sight to see (and hear), you’re sure.

Now, you’re deciding on all the cookie cutter shapes you want to use. There is so many to choose from and you typically only used a few of them each year, but you figured you’d use way more this year considering you didn’t get to make hardly any last year since it was just you and Shawn. You’ve already decided on using the tree, reindeer, santa, snowflake, and snowman ones, you just wanted one more.

“Y/N, look,” Shawn says, reaching his hand out and picking up a cookie cutter from the pile. “Let’s do the gingerbread one, that way when we decorate them we can make them look like us.”

You laugh and nod your head in response, you’d love to see how that turns out.

“Okay, I love that idea. Let’s do it!”

Shawn places the gingerbread shape with the rest of your choices, taking the unused ones and putting them away so you both have more room to work.

You grab some flour from the bag you set out earlier, and begin to lightly dust the dough with it. It’s the worst to have the dough get stuck to the counter because then you won’t be able to pick it up and put it on the tray without it breaking.

After spreading some flour on the counter as well, you lay out the dough and grab the rolling pin. You hold the pin in your hands as you take a second to look from the dough, to shawn, and then back again.

“Here, Mr. Muscles,” you say as you hold out the rolling pin to your boyfriend. “Now that you’re helping me, you can have the absolute honor of rolling out the dough.”

It’s not that you can’t roll out the dough on your own, you’ve been doing it just fine these last few years, but having Shawn do it just sounds so much better.

“Oh thanks so much, baby, I’m so grateful to be doing this,” Shawn replies sarcastically as he grabs the tool from your hands.

You giggle at Shawn’s response and shake your head. Shawn begins to roll out the dough and you lean on the counter as you watch him perform the task. All he’s doing is rolling out cookie dough but wow, you think, is this man dreamy.

*****

“Y/N, you can’t tell me this doesn’t look just like you!” Shawn laughs as he holds out the gingerbread cookie to you. “You guys are practically twins.”

“Please, I don’t look like that even on my worst day!” You laugh and roll your eyes at Shawn’s poor attempt to make the gingerbread look like you.

“Oh okay, because yours looks so much like me,” Shawn retorts, pointing at the cookie you are currently trying to make look like him as best as possible.

“Hey! Mine looks so good, I even drew on your tattoos!” You smile looking down at cookie Shawn, content with the cute designs you drew on it’s arms with the black icing.

“Babe, I know it can’t be just me that think’s the guitar tattoo looks a little…odd,” Shawn holds back his laugh while staring at the icing tattoo, feeling grateful his actual tattoo doesn’t look like that.

“It’s not my fault the cookie arms are so short and small!” You reply, feeling your cheeks heat up, knowing exactly what Shawn’s getting at. “I only had so much room to work with.”

Shawn giggles and moves closer to you, planting a kiss on the side of your head.

“It’s okay, I think they look great and I love them both,” he says as you look up at him. You give Shawn a small smile as you nod your head in agreeance.

“And I love you,” you whisper, staring up at the man you’ve been so grateful to be with these past few years. He’s everything and more you could ask for and no matter what you wouldn’t trade this relationship for the world.

“I love you so much more, my love,” Shawn grins.

“If you say so.”

Shawn leans in and connects his lips with yours, the taste of sugar still on his lips from when you let him lick the spoon earlier. The memory of it makes you smile into the kiss.

You both pull back and stare at each other fondly for a second before returning to the cookies in front of you. Teasing aside, they all do look really good and the both of you are happy with how they all turned out. The only cookies left to be put on the plate are the two gingerbread versions of you and Shawn, you had left decorating those for last.

Each of you grab the gingerbread you had been decorating and set them lightly on the plate, not wanting to risk breaking one. Stepping back, you lightly squeal with excitement, completely happy with how the cookies turned out. The fact you and Shawn made them together makes it even better.

“Well, i’d say we’re finished! Thank you for helping me, i’m proud of us,” you say to Shawn, looking over everything you’ve accomplished tonight; dinner and desert.

“You’re welcome, baby. I’m proud of us too,” Shawn agrees.

“Let’s clean everything up and by the time we’re done your parents and sister should be here.” Shawn hums in agreement before taking some of the utensils used and putting them in the sink. You start to close up different bags of ingredients and throw away the extra stuff you didn’t use but aren’t able to keep.

While pushing the plate of cookies forward so you can have room to wipe off the counter, you feel a tap on your shoulder. You turn towards Shawn and look at him questioningly, not sure what he needs.

“You have some flour on your face,” he says, causing you to instantly use your shoulder to try and wipe it off.

“Where is it?” You ask, seeing as the powder didn’t appear on your top after rubbing your cheek on it.

“Right here.” Before you can process what’s happening, Shawn reaches forward and smears flour on the side of your face. Your mouth hangs open in shock as you take a step back and watch as powder particles drift from your face onto the kitchen floor.

“You did not just do that!” You exclaim as you use the back of your hand to try and wipe off some of the flour. Shawn’s laugh fills your ears and you can’t help but want to laugh as well, but stand your ground as you walk closer to him. “You think that’s funny, huh?”

“Mhm,” Shawn smirks as he crosses his arms in front of his chest.

“Oh okay. Well so is this.” You quickly reach to your side and scoop up the flour that’s still laying on the counter, and then throw it in Shawn’s face. His eyes immediately flutter close and his nose scrunches up, causing you to burst out laughing at the sight.

“You’re gonna pay for that, Y/L/N,” Shawn grumbles as he reaches for the bag of flour. The bag tips over and a puff of white goes up into the air, some of the flour spilling out onto the counter. Shawn grabs a handful of it before starting to throw it at you in tiny pinches. It doesn’t hurt, but you can still feel the powdery substance against your skin, causing you to shriek and giggle at the feeling.

Swiftly grabbing your own handful of flour, you start to return fire on Shawn. You watch as the curls atop his head bounce from side to side as he tries to dodge your throws, and how his smile is visible even through the clouds of kitchen ingredients being thrown about.

The only sounds heard throughout the condo are laughs, shrieks, and holiday music still playing in the background. Somehow, they’re sounds you never want to forget about. Sounds filled with love and happiness, even if you’re currently throwing flour at your boyfriend.

You start to run low on ammo so you try to reach for the bag of flour but Shawn comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you, dragging you back and away from the bag. You try to wiggle out of his arms, but fail as you can’t stop laughing and Shawn’s strong grip doesn’t seem to let up.

“No more! Please! Truce, truce! I’m sorry, I surrender!” Shawn begs. He shakes his head to try and get some of the flour off and takes a big breath in before wincing. “I think i got some in my nose.”

The both of you laugh and Shawn releases you from his grasp, allowing you space to take everything in. You take a second to look over the kitchen and your laughing quickly fades to nothing. The counters and floors are completely covered in flour, everything now having a layer of white powder over it.

This is exactly why you and Shawn can never be trusted in the kitchen together. It looks as if a snowstorm happened inside your kitchen.

“Shawn,” it comes out as almost a whisper, the disbelief evident in your voice. “When I said ‘I want a white Christmas,’ this wasn’t what I had in mind.”

You think back to a few days ago when you and Shawn had been talking about Christmas wishes. You hoped it would snow all night Christmas Eve so you’d wake up to a perfect white Christmas. Needless to say this isn’t the kind you were hoping for.

Shawn let’s out a breathy laugh, not believing the fact you guys made such a mess in so little time. This isn’t going to be fun to clean up, and it’s definitely going to take a while…

A gasp escapes Shawn’s lips followed by an ‘oh shit!’

Your head whips towards him and you can see the anxiety begin to consume him.

“My parents and sister are gonna be here any minute!” The color drains from your face as the realization hits you as well. How could it slip your mind!? It’s the whole reason you and Shawn were even baking in the first place!

“I’ll go get the vacuum, you start to clean the counters!” You rush out of the kitchen before Shawn even gets a chance to respond. You’re down the hall and back within seconds and you immediately start to rid the floor of flour with the vacuum as Shawn wipes furiously at the counters.

Sneaking a glance at Shawn as you move back and forth with the vacuum, you notice how his head and chest are almost completely covered in flour. You don’t even want to think about what you must look like right now.

Shawn moves side to side from the sink to the kitchen island, trying not to trip over the vacuum as you frantically move back and forth, cleaning up as much of the flour off the floor as possible. You can’t believe you let that whole flour fight go so far, sure it was fun but definitely not something you should have done before expecting company. It’s surely something you’re going to look back on both fondly and stressfully.

A loud buzzer rings out around the condo and you and Shawn stop dead in your tracks at the sound of it.

“They’re here!” You squeak, immediately stopping the vacuum. It isn’t perfect but it’ll do. At least the floor doesn’t look like it’s completely covered in snow anymore.

“It’s okay, i’ll go push the button to let them into the building and then finish up here. It’ll take them a few minutes to get up here anyways. You go clean up.” You nod your head and hastily go and put away the vacuum before running back to your shared bedroom.

As you stand in the bathroom you can’t help but gasp at your reflection in the mirror. The flour war may not have lasted long, but it was long enough to leave you looking like a complete mess.

Flour particles cover your top and white streaks run across each side of your face. Instead of wasting time trying to wipe off the flour on your clothes, you change tops immediately. You run a brush through your hair and use wipes to get rid of the flour on your face. Somehow, it doesn’t look awful and your satisfied with the new look. It’ll have to do because it’s not like you have time to do anything else anyways.

Rushing back to the kitchen, you notice Shawn wiping at the plate of cookies and your heart instantly sinks.

“What’s wrong? Are the cookies ruined?” Shawn looks up at you and shakes his head, tossing the rag he was using to the side.

“No, they’re find. There was just some flour on the plate but I got it off, no worries.” You let out a sigh of relief and make your way towards Shawn. You reach out to hug him but step back immediately, realizing he’s still completely covered in flour.

“Shawn! You still have flour all over you!” Shawn’s eyes go wide and he looks down at his sweater and reaches his hand up to touch his face. He was so focused on cleaning he didn’t realize he still had to clean himself up too!

A round of knocks is heard and yours and Shawn’s heads both turn towards the door. You begin to walk towards it slowly, stopping for a second to look back at your boyfriend.

“Go clean up, it’s fine i’ll just tell them you’re in the bathroom or something.” Shawn nods his head and is gone in an instant. It wouldn’t be the end of the world if Shawn’s family knew what happened, but it’s not like you want them coming in to see the kitchen in complete shambles and you and Shawn looking like you rolled around in white powder. Not a good look after not being able to see them for so long.

Grasping the handle on the door, you look back towards the bedroom, hoping Shawn will be out here soon. You know how much this means to him and his family, you don’t want him to miss a second of it if he doesn’t have to.

You open the door and a smile is instantly plastered onto your face at the sight of the family in front of you. Although you’d been able to visit Shawn’s family here and there, it wasn’t the same like it used to be. With the restrictions, quarantines, and conflicting schedules it made it seem like all of you hadn’t been able to spend any time together at all. This time with them, being able to just sit down and enjoy each other’s company, means the world.

“Y/N!” Karen exclaims as she wraps you in her arms. “It’s so good to see you, love.” The happy tears spring to your eyes before you’re even able to process everything, but you’re able to hold them back as you embrace Shawn’s mom.

“It’s so good to see you guys as well! I missed you all so much,” you say, taking a step back so they can all come inside. Karen moves to the side a bit so Manny can step in and greet you.

“We missed you too, it feels like it’s been so long,” Manny sighs as he hugs you and rubs a comforting hand up and down your back. “It’s so great to be able to celebrate together, all five of us!”

You smile and nod your head in agreement, turning to greet the last Mendes.

“And of course I can’t forget about my favorite girl!” Aaliyah squeals and jumps into your arms, causing the both of you to laugh and stumble back from the door.

“I missed you, Y/N! I’m so excited to see you! You’ve gotta fill me in on everything!” Aaliyah leans in closer to you, pretending to whisper and look suspicious. “Including any embarrassing things my brother has done.”

The both of you burst out laughing again, even Karen and Manny join in. You shake your head at the girl, not surprised at all by her request.

“Speaking of your brother, where is that son of mine?” Karen questions as you all start to make your way around the corner and into the dining room.

“Oh he’s-“

“I’m right here, Mom,” Shawn says, saving you from having to make up an excuse. You look up and see Shawn leaning against the kitchen island, arms crossed, and looking perfect as ever. You’ll truly never understand how guys get ready so fast.

Shawn’s family make their way over to him and they all greet and embrace him. You smile at the sight, feeling so grateful you get to know such a loving family.

Karen, Manny, and Aaliyah all make their way to the living room, setting down their things and putting presents under the tree. You move towards Shawn, wrapping your arms around him from the side.

“You clean up nice, Mendes,” you tease, taking a look at not only Shawn himself, but also at the kitchen. It looks like the flour fight never even happened. There’s a spot here and there but it’s normal for having cooked and baked all day. Everything turned out wonderful, at least you hope it did.

“What can I say? I do my best,” Shawn replies, smirking down at you. You roll your eyes and pat his chest before moving back from him.

“Sure you do, baby.” The both of you chuckle before Shawn reaches out and grabs your hand. “Let’s go have a nice time with your family.”

You begin to lead Shawn towards the dining table, but the soft pull of your hand makes you stop and turn back towards him.

“Our family,” he says as he stares at you fondly. Those same tears from earlier seem to make their way back to you, leaving your eyes brimmed with them as they threaten to spill over.

“Our family,” you whisper in return, your heart feeling full at the fact Shawn and his family consider you part of theirs. They truly are some of the kindest people you have ever had the pleasure of meeting.

“C’mon, let’s eat,” Shawn says before taking the lead and pulling you towards the dining table. Shawn’s parents and sister join you and soon you’re all sitting down, ready to dive into all the delicious food.

*****

Dinner went wonderfully. It consisted of good food, laughs, stories, and a whole lot of off-key singing as the holiday music continued on in the background. Shawn helped you clear everyone’s plates and store the leftover food, so now you’re all sitting at the table having drinks and enjoying each other’s company before you eventually head to the living room.

Every person at the table can be seen with a smile on their face, each of you enjoying your time to the fullest. Even as the chatter begins to die down, everyone feeling full after eating, there continues to be a quick remark here and there, someone remembering a story they wanted to share or a joke they wanted to tell. Every topic and remembrance of something else to share is welcomed, no one wanting to give up this special time just yet.

After a few more minutes of letting everyone’s food settle, you excuse yourself and make you way to the kitchen. You reach over the counter and grab the large plate of cookies you and Shawn had made, excited to share them with everyone.

“Are those what I think they are?” Aaliyah asks as she watches you walk back over to the table. You nod your head as you set the plate down in the middle of the table.

“Homemade Christmas cookies, brought to you by some recipe I found a long time ago, me, and surprisingly; Shawn.” You glance at Shawn and smile when you catch his eye, still loving the fact he helped you make them and that it ended in a war in the kitchen.

“Oh god, Shawn helped?” Aaliyah grimaces as she picks up one of the cookies shaped as a Christmas tree. “Suddenly I don’t want a cookie.”

“Hey! I’m a good baker! You haven’t even tried them yet,” Shawn slumps in his chair and you can’t help but giggle at him. Aaliyah just rolls her eyes jokingly before examining the cookie further.

“Did you guys put powdered sugar on them?” Aaliyah asks as she takes a bite out of the cookie.

Your eyebrows furrow in confusion, knowing for a fact you didn’t. There’s frosting on the cookies, the kind that dries solid, so that’s plenty sugar as it is. You reach over and grab one of the other cookies to see what she’s talking about and you nearly gasp at what you find.

“Shawn!” You whisper as you hold the cookie out in front of him. You look over and see Aaliyah’s talking to Manny and Karen, all of them oblivious to what you’re saying to Shawn. “There’s flour on the cookies! I thought you said they were fine when you were cleaning?”

Shawn takes the cookie from your hand and groans when he notices the white specks across it.

“Sorry! I thought they were. I only noticed the flour on the plate, I didn’t realize some of it got on the actual cookies.” Shawn leans forward and grabs the plate, wanting to see if all of the cookies are like that.

“Look, it’s just the few that were exposed on top.” He grabs one of the clean napkins and begins to brush off the specks of flour on top of each affected cookie. “See? All good.”

Shawn places the plate back in the middle of the table and smiles as his mom and dad each take one. He grabs the two gingerbread versions of the both of you and hands the one you made of him to you, while he keeps the one he made of you.

“So, baby sis, how do you like the cookies?” Shawn smirks as he awaits Aaliyah’s reply, so sure she’s going to think they’re wonderful and take back her remark about Shawn probably ruining them.

“Eh, they’re okay and that’s only because Y/N took part in making them, if it was just you they’d be awful,” Aaliyah laughs and you join in as you watch Shawn pout and slump in his chair yet again. “Really though they are good, I feel like I can taste some flour though…”

You shake your head and narrow your eyes at Shawn. “You can thank your brother for that one. Let’s just say we had a little mishap with the flour in the process of finishing the cookies.”

“Why am I not surprised?” Aaliyah tilts her head as she looks at the both of you and everyone starts laughing, Shawn’s cheeks turning a rosy color in the midst of it.

Aaliyah, Karen, and Manny get up and head to the living room, ready to wind down and exchange gifts. You go to join them but Shawn quickly reaches for your arm before you can get far.

“Wait, we have to take a bite out of cookie us,” he says, picking up the version of you he made. You laugh at his way of putting it but nod your head in agreement. After all the drama in the kitchen earlier, the least you can do is try one of the cookies that started it all.

You take a bite out of cookie Shawn’s arm, the one with the questionable guitar tattoo on it, and Shawn takes a bite out of cookie you’s leg. You hum in delight at the taste. Not bad, you think.

“You taste pretty good,” Shawn mumbles against your ear before nudging his nose against the side of your head, letting out a small chuckle.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” you reply, feeling a little bit of warmth in your cheeks due to Shawn’s joke.

The both of you set down your cookies and then wipe your hands off on your napkins. You turn towards Shawn and give him a soft smile as he reaches out and tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear. He leans down and captures your lips in a sweet kiss, the taste of the cookie still fresh on his lips.

Shawn pulls back and wraps you in his arms, holding you close as you both look over at his parents and sister, watching as Manny says something that makes his wife and daughter laugh hysterically.

“Thank you for everything tonight, Y/N. For cooking and baking and getting the condo ready. Especially for being so open to my parents and sister year after year. You don’t know how much all of it means to me,” Shawn says.

“You don’t have to thank me, baby. We did all of it together, and if anyone should be thanking someone it’s me thanking you. You and this family are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and i’m so happy you’ve all let me be a part of it.” You lightly squeeze Shawn in appreciation, feeling emotional over his comment.

“I love you so much, pretty girl.” Shawn mumbles into your hair. You smile at the feeling and nickname before looking up at him.

“I love you too, Shawn.”

Shawn leans in and gives you a kiss on the forehead, instantly leaving behind a feeling of warmth and love.

“Hey, lovebirds come check it out! It’s snowing!” Aaliyah’s voice cuts through the trance you and Shawn seem to be in, and you turn to look over at her. She’s standing by the large glass windows in the living room and although it’s a little hard to see, it’s clear snow has started to fall outside.

You watch in awe as the snow outside mixes with the lights of the surrounding buildings, everything looking like starlight. The city at night is one of yours and Shawn’s favorite sights and is why you both love the view from the condo so much. Everything always looks so incredible from up here.

“I guess you’ll get your true white Christmas after all,” Shawn says as he watches you stare out at the city, knowing how much you had hoped for this and how excited you must be.

“I guess so,” you reply, turning back to face your boyfriend.

Shawn holds out his hand for you and you gladly take it, allowing him to lead you into the living room, ready to continue the night with your family.

[belovasangel]

Come Back to Me

Summary: Shawn missing big events leaves to beautiful memories and Christmas miracles

Pairing: Shawn x fem!Nurse!Reader

Warnings: swearing, light angst, fluff, flashback heavy, holiday feelings 

A/N: Yup. Surprise. Also flashbacks are in italics, per usual. Also I am not Canadian so I don’t know if y’all celebrate Remembrance Day. For the sake of this story, pretend that it’s the equivalent to Thanksgiving.

Shawn took your hand as you barreled down the sidewalk, laughs flying past you in the wind. Tonight had been a perfect date, something great to wrap the summer up, full of time alone with your favorite guy (and your favorite wine). He had been planning this for weeks now, and you can even remember him talking about this back in June when his tour had been announced. The pandemic put a damper on your two’s plans since March, but once the numbers started decreasing did he get calls from managers, and then... there was another world tour. You weren’t mad, music was his passion. Even though you two would be wrapped in each other’s arms after a lovely night, you could tell behind his eyes he longed to play the guitar for different cities. 

That’s why tonight was so important, because he started packing and planning, then he would leave on Wednesday for Prague. And of course, your job needed you in Toronto. While Canada hasn’t experienced any significantly alarming numbers, there were still cases rolling in. You insisted that Shawn goes on tour, so much that you had to pay for his first ticket yourself (he payed you back, though. He insisted). 

Shawn skidded to a stop, turning around and putting his hands on your shoulders. “Now promise me you’re gonna close your eyes, just for a few seconds.”

You huffed and shrugged your shoulders, “Shawn I’m out of breathe, you made me run in heels for about half a mile... Give me 5 minutes instead.” With a quick chuckle, he pecked your lips and turned you around. You heard his shuffling from those black boots he wears to rubble, then decided to look around. He somehow managed to find a quaint park, with a nice bubbling fountain and family’s scattered around. Dogs were running a lit in the distance, and the bustle of the city wasn’t nearly as booming as it usually is. This was nice.

“Okay, turn around.”

With a giggle, you turned around to see Shawn on one knee. Behind him was a tree strung with lights that were glowing, and underneath the tree was champagne and a radio playing your two’s song, Turning the Page (Yeah, we know it’s from Twilight, but that doesn’t stop it from being any less romantic). He was kneeled on a red and white picnic blanket, the typical one you’d see in catalogues for fall. On the blanket were rose petals scattered. 

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), you have changed my life for the better. The moment you saw me in the E.R., and had to take care of my broken hand, I knew you were just as kind and gentle as you looked. Once you let me in, and take you on that shitty first date, I got to see the real you. The you that cries during every Disney movie, the you that would bring me breakfast in bed when I had a rough day, the you that would rescue a damn pigeon off the street because it looked sad. You are the most sincere, selfless, and intelligent woman I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, and I don’t want ever want to stop or slow down. You have become my life and my rock, I’m completely lost without you. I am utterly in love with you, (Y/N). I want us to have a family, I want to make an album for you, and everything in between. Will you please marry me?”

You shuddered awake, looking quickly at your blaring alarm from the end table. Picking it up and turning it off, the time read 4:25 A.M., signaling it was time to get ready for work. You got up, and went to open the blinds to your bedroom, watching the snow fall steadily. Slipping on your socks and bathrobe, you shuffled to the kitchen to get a cup of tea brewing before you hit the shower. 

Mornings like this weren’t incredibly tough anymore, once Shawn was gone on tour. He face-timed you once a week because of tour, sent you letters and packages from your favorite cities, and even had roses delivered on your birthday. And of course, he always said, “Lemme see it. I wanna see you wear that pretty ring. There it is, there she is, soon-to-be Mrs. Mendes.”

Slipping in the hot shower, you played some of his songs, some of your regular playlists, and when you were throwing on your outfit, your two’s song. You missed Shawn. He had missed your two’s favorite holiday, Halloween, where you two always did the cheesy couple costumes. He missed your birthday, but he sent his family in place. He missed Remembrance Day, because in Europe that wasn’t a thing. And tomorrow is Christmas, where he has no sign of coming home whatsoever. That’s fine, though, because you took the long shift at the hospital.

When the song came to an end, you threw on your coat and snow boots, grabbing all the food and equipment you would need for a 12-hour and began to head out. Shawn sent you his daily vlog and you watched that on the shuttle. Once that was over, you got to the hospital where you would forget about your slightly more aching heart. After work, the routine would basically go in reverse. Commute home, get back into your pajama’s, drink some tea, get dinner, and go to bed, where you would have a restless night in an empty bed.

“When do you think we should have the wedding?”

Shawn looked over, a piece of popcorn hanging onto his lip like a lifeline. His cheeks were flushed and he still looked a little sweaty from the show he just played at TD Garden. He knew you were doing the planning to keep yourself from descending into madness (well, not entirely, but you only brought it up when you really missed him). “I think we should do a summer/fall sort of wedding, like when the leaves are red but it isn’t freezing by 5, ya know?”

You hummed in agreement, a smile picking at the corners of your mouth. “I completely agree. Do you want it to be outdoors then, because of the leaves?”

Shawn took another few things of popcorn from the bag and popped them into his swollen lips, he always licked them when he was frustrated by how a show went, or just when his mind was reeling. “I think we should get married outdoors, and then have the reception indoors. Kind of like-”

“Twilight...”

You both looked at the screen and snorted, sending both of you into fits of hysteria. “Shawn, we really base our relationship off of those books, didn’t we?” He looked over, licking his lips once again. “Explain, babe. I get a little bit, but our whole relationship?”

You shuffled in the bed a little bit, “Hear me out, Shawn-y boy. We met when you were hurt and I had to save you, or more-so your career. Edward saved Bella from the car, right? Right. So, there’s that. Then that girl who you worked on the album with tried to get you on the few dates, but that was long after we were official. Boom, Jacob plot line. Then you leave me for your first tour, which I get 100%, so don’t be upset over that. But the girl you worked with saw you kind of sad and made it her mission to befriend you and then attempt to change your mind over me... And our song is the one from their wedding, and we want an outdoors-y wedding.....”

Shawn looked at the screen, then back to the popcorn leaking butter in his hands. “Damn. So you’re saying that I’m Bella?” You began to shake your head, cheeks turning red. “Maybe I meant that wrong, but-”

“No, no you’re saying I’m Bella. Does that mean I get to wear the dress? I cannot wait to get married with no emotions and then have the ugliest CGI baby in the history of cinematics. Aren’t you so excited for that, my love?”

“Absolutely thrilled.”

The alarm on your phone blared once again, pulling you from Shawn. You picked up the phone, getting a few “Merry Christmas” texts from family and friends. You assumed Shawn was out partying with his crew mates, plus it must’ve been a busy day altogether. Turning off the alarm and standing, you pulled on the slippers and followed your routine again. 

Once it got to 6:07, and still no text from Shawn, you decided to call him. Immediately, you were sent to voicemail. With a sigh, you waited for voicemail.

“Hey bubs, Merry Christmas! I miss you more than ever, it’s snowing here pretty rough. I know you’d probably go outside right about now and insist to make a snowman or some angels, so that might be a mission for me after work. Um, I wanted to let you know that I love you so much, and I hope you’re having fun on tour... The apartment isn’t the same without you here, especially around this time. You’re probably having fun with your friends and I don’t wanna intrude on that, so I’ll hang up. I love you Shawn, be careful. Stay safe, come back to me soon. Bye.”

Wiping the tear that fell down your cheek, you stepped outside your apartment, hopped into the elevator and began the commute to your shift. You got to work on record time, beginning your patient rounds and vitals, then celebrating with the coworkers. Working 6:30 AM-9:30 PM would be a tough one, but whatever to keep you under that roof. Plus, double-time because of the holiday.

Once it hit 9:30, you booked it out of the hospital and onto the shuttle. Your eyes were barely open as you saw the texts from Shawn.

(Shawn) 7:59 AM: Hey babe, I’m so sorry I didn’t answer your call! I can’t wait to see your face tonight, you still up for FaceTime?

(Shawn) 9:26 AM: I bet you’re busy, but I’m gonna be in a few conferences and doing press so I won’t be able to talk for a while. Love you!

(Shawn) 3:14 PM: (Y/N) I don’t think we can FaceTime tonight, I have to do something for a fan and it’s really important. I am so sorry.

(Shawn) 8:44 PM: Are you mad at me or are you still working?

(Shawn) 9:32 PM: Something is waiting for you at home, it’s your gift. I hope this can make up for the call!

You hopped out of the shuttle, heart feeling extra heavy as you walked into the apartment. The string lights and streamers along the walls were taunting you as the elevator brought you to your floor, and you tried to compose yourself until you would get inside. Stepping up to your door, you looked for the present, to no avail.

(Y/N) 9:45 PM: Shawn I don’t see a package

(Shawn) 9:45 PM: Mom must’ve brought it inside, I’m sure it’s there.

With a huff, you shoved the key into the door, and walked inside. Chucking your purse and coat onto the hooks, while flinging off your shoes, you composed yourself enough to look for the package. If he got it express-shipped it had to be good. Checking the kitchen was no luck, and the living room looked normal. 

(Shawn) 9:48 PM: Bedroom, babe

With a gasp, you quickly buzzed to the bedroom, and laid your hand on the door. You stopped, hesitant to what was behind the door. What if it isn’t him? Taking a deep breath, you dismissed the negative thought and opened.

The room was filled with lit tea lights, rose petals on the bed and the floor, and Shawn. He was standing there in that chunky-white knit sweater you loved, with flushed cheeks and watery eyes, holding a bouquet of flowers, and your favorite song playing softly in the background.

You gasped, running into his arms with a squeal and sob, him mimicking the sound. He held onto the small of your back, and one hand on the back of your neck, and you felt his tears falling onto your skin. “I missed you so much, (Y/N). You don’t even know.” He pulled back slightly pressing his lips to yours in a soft embrace.

After a minute of kissing, you pulled back. “Merry Christmas, Shawn.”

“Merry Christmas, (Y/N).”

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

Operation: Christmas Decorating

You enjoy Christmas a lot. And even though, you promised to wait until the first of December before unleashing, an opportunity presents itself. 

Enjoy my masterlist

Enjoy the Christmas 2020 Blurb + Fic Masterlist 

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_________

He knew you had been bitting back your tongue, had been curating the playlist the second the clock from from October 31st to November 1st. There was a strict rule in the house that even though the Holidays did deserve every second from October 1st, there still needed to be lines on when it was appropriate to turn the dial to a 100. 

He figured you’d break after Thanksgiving--the second you guys had washed dishes and put up left overs you’d be begging to turn on your Christmas playlist. But you held out. The Friday came and went and you didn’t make a peep about your Christmas decorations. Saturday rolled around and still nothing had occurred. Sunday came and still nothing from you. Shawn was almost concerned--you didn’t seem sluggish, you weren’t cranky, you didn’t curl up in bed. In fact, you were up and about earlier than ever before.

“I’ll be back soon. You sure the entire list is complete?” he asks, slipping his arms into his coat. 

“Positive. I checked it twice.” Shawn scoffs at the obvious pun. “Okay, you can’t be mad at me about that,” you return with a roll of your eyes. 

Shawn kisses the top of your head. “I’m not. I’ll be back soon. Let me know if you think of anything.”

You nod. “Will do.” On the inside it was slowly killing you that you hadn’t put up the Christmas tree or broken out any sort of lights to decorate the apartment. However, you told yourself that you were going to make it past the weekend. And now at Monday, you were done. You needed something Christmas in the house and with Shawn leaving for grocery, you were going to seize the opportunity. 

Pairing your computer to the speakers, you found your curated playlist--mostly the Christmas songs you grew up, ones your mother would blast when decorating the house, but also a few new ones you had come across. The opening drums of Donny Hathaway’s This Christmas fills the house and you head into the utility closet. A giant plastic bin sits on the floor with a red and green label for Christmas. 

You drag it out and lug it to the middle of the living room. You can start in the kitchen. You have tea towels that need to be hug along with a mini plastic christmas tree that always sits up in the window of the kitchen. You also have the fake candle lights--they are plastic and made to look like white tall slender candles your with a bulb as the flame--your mother passed on to you that go up in every window during the holiday season. 

With each window, or at many windows that you can fill, you figure the mini tree is next. Unearthing it form it’s neatly stacked and packed space, you set it up with the tiny mini ornaments you bought for it too. It sits nicely on the sill and the multi colored string lights blink steadily up at you. 

You pull down the old brown towel, with orange leaves for fall and drape the white towel filled with candy canes over the handle of the oven. Turning your attention to the living room, you know you can’t put the tree up jutst--Shawn will kill you if you do that. However, you think a little bit of Christmas string lights and some garland won’t hurt. 

The songs shuffle along, and you end up dancing and singing more than you do decorating. When Aretha Franklin’s Winter Wonderland comes on you wrap the garland around your neck as if it was were some faux fur scarf. You twirl around in your socks, letting the movement take you around the living room. You feel transported, happy. And sure, you know it’s all temporary and the gift giving can sometimes feel like a chore, but there’s something about having a moment in time to truly put into perspective what’s important, to spend time with the people that matter the most to you--family or friends doesn’t matter. 

“So this was your game plan?”

You turn to the sound of Shawn’s voice, right as the song ends and another one comes on. Your heart thunders in your chest. “I lasted past the weekend. And I mean, c’mon!” You replay the last song. “How can you not let this play?”

Shawn listens for a moment. “Who’s that?”

“Aretha Franklin. It’s my Soulful Christmas playlist.”

His brow raises--you’ve never mentioned that once to him before. He listens to a couple songs play through and he can’t help but laugh when you slide up to him and guide him towards the middle of the living room. Your smile is big and bright as the songs play--even the sad ones. You sing along to each of them and the bass is shaking his teeth. He can see the kitchen’s been redecorated and where you started and got distracted with the living room. It’s cozy, for sure. You even turned on the fireplace and the warmth is seeping in under the layers of his clothes. 

“This is impressive. But you do realize it’s not even December yet.”

“Close your eyes until 12:01 am and then it will be,” you retort, laughing into his chest as he guides you two into a dance. 

His laughter rumbles in your ears from his chest. “I’ll make an exception this time.”

“Want to help me finish decorating?”

“Oh no, that’s a mess you got yourself in. But I’ll bake cookies while you work.”

With a gasp, you pull away. “You didn’t.”

His grin is bright. “Even got the Christmas ones.”

You cup his face and press several short pecks to his lips. “I knew I loved you for a reason.” Shawn can only laugh as you smush his cheeks together. 

[allwaswell16]

One Direction friends to lovers fics where one of the characters is having a sexuality crisis as requested in this ask. You can find all my other fic recs here. If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! Happy reading!

—Harry/Louis—

⊹ Learning to Breathe by youcomecrash / @drunkharrystyles-blog

(E, 110k, uni au) He’s playing football at one of the top universities in England and he should love everything about his life right now, but instead he’s moving backwards. 

⊹ Heading for Limbo by @kingsofeverything

(E, 100k, famous/not famous) When Harry discovers some life-changing things about himself, Louis is there for him, however he needs. But it’s all temporary because Louis has plans that will move his life from New York all the way to L.A. and the distance isn’t the only thing between them.

⊹ Follow Your Arrow by Anonymous

(E, 78k, high school) It's senior year and everything is about to change.

⊹Passing By by Larry_you_know / @larryyouknow

(E, 48k, vacation) the one where Harry doesn't even know he's into guys until he meets Louis on a boat trip. There's something more to their friendship but it ain't gonna be smooth sailing.

That's What I'm Here For by @taggiecb

(E, 46k, farm au) Louis needs help running his business but has no idea where to even start looking.

⊹ And Touch Me Like You Never by runaway_train / @runaway-train-works

(E, 35k, roommates) The one where Harry and Louis agree to be each other's New Year's kiss and it ends up being a lot more than they bargained for.

⊹ Follow Your Heart by dimpled_halo / @comebackassholes

(E, 32k, fake relationship) “We think it would be best to market you guys as a couple,” Simon tells them. The tone in his voice makes Louis think there’s no wiggle room to even try to argue about it.

⊹ others i've seen might never be mean (but they would never do) by @cherrylouvol6

(M, 20k, girl direction) a When Harry Met Sally AU in which Louis says all the wrong things and Harry always feels one step behind.

⊹ Supposed to Be by kikikryslee / @flamboyantommo

(M, 26k, high school au) the Geek Charming AU where Harry's a film geek, Louis' a popular jock, and they both need each other to get what they want.

⊹ Blush by orphan_account

(M, 15k, girl direction) the Christmas FxF Larry fic in which Louis is 99.5% sure she's straight and Harry likes to walk around shirtless and watch lesbian films

⊹ Waiting for Wonderful by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird

(M, 13k, pining) Harry is willing to wait as long as he needs to for his best friend to realise that they're supposed to be together, but it kills him to watch Louis struggle in his relationship with Mackenzie.

⊹ Nobody compares to you by fallenflowercrowns / @headband-husbands

(T, 10k, tumblr au) the one where Harry falls in love twice, Louis is just incredibly sweet and supportive, and Al from tumblr is super nice but also really secretive about his identity - not that Harry can blame him, considering his own blog is run under false pretences, too.

⊹ Elle Me Dit by QuickedWeen / @becomeawendybird

(M, 3k, girl direction) On the night of her bachelorette party she and her best friend/Maid of Honor, Harry, get drunk and wonder what they're missing out on.

—Rare Pairs—

⊹ You Don't Care About Me (One More Night) by @lululawrence

(NR, 60k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) the one where Louis pines for Harry and Nick helps ease his way into figuring himself out through a friends with benefits sort of arrangement. Things quickly turn complicated.

⊹ we're still the kings of the Friday nights by we_are_the_same / @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed

(T, 22k, Zayn/Louis) Zayn’s been everything, for so long now. His moral compass, his partner in crime, his ride or die. And as of tonight, the first boy Louis has ever kissed.

⊹ The Stories They're Not In by abrighteryellow / @a-brighter-yellow

(E, 10k, Niall/Shawn Mendes) An AU inspired by Niall Horan's "San Francisco," the movie Rocketman, and Elton John and Bernie Taupin's real-life relationship (except more gay).

[princecharmingmendes]

All I Want for Christmas is You | Shawn Mendes

                                MERRY CHRISTMAS Y'ALL!

When everything goes wrong on your Christmas plans Shawn always knows how to make it right.

*Word Count: +4.7K

*Warnings: cursing, kissing, slight angst and a whole lot of fluff.

*Posted: December 25th, 2019

                                                            -*-

I am not panicking.

I’m just a little late and Shawn is finally back from tour, which just ended, and I’m supposed to pick him up.

Fuck, I’m full panicking.

I’m on the middle of traffic and my tire just punctured, what an amazing day, oh, and it’s also raining. When I think thins can’t get worse my phone starts ringing.

“Hello?”

“Hi, baby, my flight is early, I’m just picking my bags” Shawn said with smile evident in his voice, which only made me want to punch myself harder.

“Hey, Shawn, I’m so sorry, I have a flat tire and I’m also stuck in traffic, I’m so sorry, so so sorry”

“Hey, it’s okay, you didn’t do anything wrong, do you want me to go there?”

“No, it’s okay, Shawn, I just need to get this whole situation figured out”

“Are you sure, honey? I really don’t mind”

“Everything’s fine, I’ll meet you at home?”

“Y/N, are you sure you’re fine?”

“Yeah! It’s okay, I’m sorry, baby, I’m so sorry”

“Stop apologizing, it’s not your fault, I’ll meet you back home then”

“Okay, bye, love you” I said hanging up to solve things as fast as I could.

                                                          -*-

One hour, that’s the fastest I was able to get everything wrapped up and head home in an Uber. I got to our floor as quickly as I could, completely breathless and looking like a crazy woman. Trying to gain some composure I took a few deep breaths and also trying to get my hair in place, which was clearly not working, so I just gave up and walked in, seeing the whole room dark and just feeling relief, he’s not here yet.

He’s not here yet! He should be!

“Shawn? Shawn?! SHAWN?!” I started shouting through the condo.

“I’m here, honey” I heard his voice coming from our bathroom so I ran there only to him in his sweatpants, shirtless with damp hair and smelling amazing.

“Hi” I mumbled crossing my arms over my chest and leaning against the door.

“Hey, honey, c’mere” he said opening his arms and I instantaneously jumped in his warm embrace, allowing me to feel him engulfing me and pressing our lips together “God, I missed you” he mumbled into the kiss, tightening his arms around me even more.

“I missed you too, Shawnie”

“You’re coming with me next time”

“We can discuss this later” I said kissing him again, with my arms tightly wrapped around his neck.

“Okay, okay, we should sleep, right?”

“Oh, sure” I said biting my lips and squeezing him a little tighter.

“What’s wrong? I thought you were tired after everything”

“I am, I just didn’t know if you would be, so I made reservations for your favorite restaurant”

“That’s amazing, I can just go change in five if you let me”

“Whatever you want, Shawn”

“You’re in charge, baby” he said placing a kiss on my forehead.

“Sleeping sounds tempting” I said nuzzling my face on his neck.

“Don’t you wanna shower first?”

“Are you implying I smell bad?”

“No” he said chuckling “you just seem stressed, maybe a warm shower could ease it”

“You’re probably right, like most of the time, I’m just too lazy”

“I can get everything ready and leave you to shower while I get the bedroom ready for us to snuggle up and just enjoy each others company”

“I love you” I said placing my chin on his sternum to look at his gorgeous face.

“I love you too, babygirl” he said kissing my forehead and picking me up, only to place me seated on the counter.

“I should be doing this for you, you’re the one who got home today”

“I’m fine, and I haven’t been able to take proper care of you, and I like doing this”

“Okay, I’m sorry”

“Why are you apologizing, honey?”

“I don’t know, I’m...”

“Don’t, just try to relax a little, it’s just me, you don’t have to worry about anything, okay?”

“Okay”

He placed the sweetest kiss in my lips and started getting everything ready, once the shower was running and in a nice temperature he told me to get in and meet him in the bedroom, that he was only coming back to get ready for bed and to leave here something for me to where if I wanted.

And so I did.

The shower really did help to ease my tired muscles and relieve some of the stress I was going through. Finishing it up, I wrapped myself in a towel and then changed into the clothes he left, not going unnoticed the fact that he picked his hoodie and sweatpants for me to wear. Already changed, I put my hair in a messy bun and headed to the room, being met with a very shirtless and very hot boyfriend laying in bed with his phone in hands and searching for something in the TV.

“Hey” he said as I stood beside the bed, putting my phone to charge, turning off the lights and diving in the see of blankets, warmth and Shawn.

“Hi” I said as I scooted closer to him, feeling him pulling me into his chest.

“Comfy?”

“Of course I am, you’re a giant teddy bear! That’s the reason why I moved in with you a year and a half ago”

“The only reason?”

“And the back rubs, nice condo and amazing music taste”

“Good to know”

“And because I love you, but that’s just a small detail”

“Sure is”

“Did you pick a movie yet?”

“No, do you have something in mind?”

“Nah, too tired to care about anything other than you right now”

“Okay, friends it is”

“But that’s my go to show”

“I know, honey” he said chuckling and kissing my forehead “you smell nice”

“I just came out of the shower”

“I know, I just missed it”

“What? My shampoo?”

“Well, yeah, but it’s not just it, it’s just your scent”

“Hm, what about it?”

“It’s yours” he stated the obvious, stroking his thumb across my cheek gently “it smells like home” and with that, I couldn’t help myself stretching and placing a kiss on his lips.

“You’re too sweet, Shawnie”

“I’m just honest” he said grinning at me softly “you should rest”

“No! You just got back, I want to enjoy you a little bit more” I said with a pout on my face.

“And I’m not going anywhere! It’s like two days till Christmas”

“I know, I just want to spend as much time with you as possible”

“I do too, but you need to rest, darling, I know you had a few tough weeks and I’m here to make sure you actually relax” he said combing his long fingers through my hair, making me close my eyes.

“Okay, okay, but gimme a kiss”

“Whatever you want” he said leaning down and capturing my lips in his, one of his hands on the back of my head holding me in place, almost as if I was going to disappear, and the other one pressed on my lower back, squeezing me as tightly as possible.

The kiss was a little bit lazy but at the same time he didn’t fail to show me through his body language that he missed me and that he loved me. His tongue gently messaging mine, as if he was rediscovering everything all over again. My hands were on his hair, pulling at it softly, after all, I’m actually tired, making him whimper softly, nipping at my bottom lip, only to kiss me again. I just loved him so much, everything about him, and having this all over again just feels to surreal.

He parted away placing light feathered kisses on my lips and all over my face, making me giggle lightly and close my eyes, lazily smiling at him. He chuckled and kissed my forehead, holding my head against his chest as his other hand traced random shapes on my back under my (his) hoodie.

“Sleep, baby” he said barely louder than a whisper.

“M’kay” I said nuzzling my face on his collarbone and placing a kiss on there.

“Goodnight, sleep well, my love”

“Goodnight, Shawnie boy” I mumbled against his warm skin, finally drifting of to sleep.

                                                          -*-

On the next morning, we woke up and I needed to head to the office to get somethings sorted out before the 24th to be actually able to enjoy Christmas at Shawn’s parents. So I had a nice lunch with him, telling my boss I was going to be a little bit late and I was going to compensate that when I left, which she was fine with it since I was not even supposed to work today.

Arriving at work, things were catastrophic. I dropped my stuff on my office and started fixing every possible mistake I could have found. A few hours later, I sat down at the office, confirming the reservations I had at Shawn’s favorite restaurant and looked at the clock, noticing I still had two hours till I had to leave to meet him at home, so I just started working again. I was so caught up in what I was doing that I didn’t even noticed someone standing at my door.

“Babe?” Shawn called with made me turn around to face him.

“Hey, baby, what are you doing here? Wait, I’m almost done and then we can go to that restaurant I promised you and...” that’s when I looked at the wall and saw that my clock was still showing the same time I saw hours ago “shit!” I said going through my stuff only to find my phone dead.

“What’s wrong?” He asked stepping closer.

“What time is it?”

“Almost nine, that’s why I’m here, I got worried and you didn’t reply to my message from hour ago or my phone calls, so since there was a storm coming I got worried that something happened, I’m sorry tough, you’re still busy, right?”

“Oh my god, Shawn” I said covering my face with my hands.

“What’s wrong, princess?” He said kneeling in front of me.

“I... I...”

“Shh, breathe, honey” he said kissing the back of my hands “it’s okay, just breathe and then you can tell me” he said and I did it, trying to organize my thoughts.

“I had reservations for your favorite restaurant, but I got so caught up on work that I didn’t even noticed my phone died and that my clock stopped, and the reservations were until nine, we can’t get there in five minutes, it’s impossible, I’m so sorry I’m such a mess, God, Shawn, I’m so so so sorry, baby, I just wanted to take care of you, I didn’t even need to be here today, I just...”

“I know, you wanted to be free till New Year’s Eve and also to be free from problems during the Christmas days, I know, and it’s okay, it happens a lot with me, you know how caught up I can get, it’s okay, we can order in”

“Or I can cook for you!”

“Honey, you’re tired, we can order from that Japanese place you like so much”

“No, stop thinking about pleasing me, you choose!”

“I’m choosing that place, baby” he said kissing my forehead as he got up “I like there too and you deserve it, now let’s go home”

“Okay” I said completely defeated and getting up to grab my stuff.

“Don’t do that, don’t blame yourself, it’s really okay, I don’t mind, we can go there any other day you want, I just want to be with you wherever you want”

“Okay” I said sighing and heading outside the office with him, going straight to his car as he did the same, too cold to waist any time outside.

“We can eat sushi while watching whatever you want”

“Harry Potter”

“Seriously?”

“What? You picked my favorite restaurant, I’m picking your favorite movies”

“Well, I can’t argue with that” he said placing his hand with his palm up on my thigh, so I locked my fingers with his.

“I know” I said with a smirk on my lips, making him chuckle.

“What are we doing tomorrow?”

“We can bake cookies to take to you parents house”

“What else?”

“We can cuddle”

“Nice”

“And maybe, when we get back on the 25th we can go see the lights”

“Perfect” he said kissing my knuckles and parking at home.

And we spent the rest of the night in, tangled in each other and soft blankets, eating sushi, drinking wine and watching movies. Also eventually making out or making fun of each other.

                                                          -*-

“Baby!”

“What, honey?”

“You can’t do this!”

“Why?”

“Shawn!”

“They’re so cute”

“That’s not Christmas!”

“And?”

“You were supposed to decorate the Christmas cookie, not Harry Potter themed cookies” I said trying my best not to laugh at the Santa shaped cookies being decorated to fit the Harry Potter characters.

“But they are a lot nicer and more unique”

“Baby?”

“What?”

“Nothing, I just feel like, I don’t know, pull all my hair out when I’m around”

“And that’s bad because...?”

“Do I need to answer?”

“Doesn’t that mean you’re madly in love with me?”

“Well, can be too”

“See?”

“Okay, Mendes, but can you do Christmas themed as well?”

“I can do a few, even though they are boring”

“Thank you, baby” I said kissing his cheek, pulling a sweet smile out of him as he was focusing on decorating again.

Just like that my phone vibrated on the table, so I picked it up and unlocked it, there were a few useless notifications, a message from Karen saying for us to be careful on the roads and not to go if it’s too dangerous, a weather notification telling about a heavy snow storm coming, which was unusual and a text from my sister, that I haven’t talked to in years saying that I should call her. But at the end I chose to ignore her, if it was important she would call me.

“Shawnie?”

“What, honey?”

“There’s a storm coming, and your mom told us to not go if the weather is too bad, what time do you want to leave to make sure we can really go?”

“At six?”

“That’s good, are your things ready?”

“Yeah, they’re packed beside yours”

“Thank you” I said wrapping my arms around his middle as he kept adding ‘personality’ -according to him- to each cookie.

“For packing my own stuff like an adult?” He asked chuckling and kissing my hair.

“No, you idiot” I said smacking his bicep lightly while chuckling “for being you, for doing everything you do and for being with me, I’m luckiest person on the planet”

“Oh honey, that’s not true” he said letting go of the decoration itens to hug me “I just do all this stuff because I love you and I always want to be you’re everything”

“You are, Shawn, you are”

“I’m going to keep trying to be that forever”

“You already are, dummy” I said kissing his shoulder, which was what I could reach.

“Okay, baby, I...” he was cut by my phone ringing.

“You?”

“Pick it up, I’ll tell you later” he said kissing my temple and grabbed the phone to answer.

“Hello?”

“Y/N?”

“What do you want, Jennifer?” I asked and Shawn’s eyes got wide when I mentioned my sister’s name.

“Are you still in Toronto?”

“Why?”

“I need your help”

“My help? You don’t talk to me in years and now you want my help?”

“Please, it’s important”

“Call your parents, oh wait, you don’t talk to them either”

“Y/N, I’m pregnant”

“Do you still live with him?”

“No, but I’m still at the same house”

“I’m on my way”

“Thank you”

“Whatever, Jennifer” I said hanging up.

“What’s wrong, honey?”

“Jennifer is pregnant and alone, since her sugar daddy or whatever left her for someone younger last week”

“Do you want me to go with you or you need anything?”

“No, I’m just going to check on her and try to put some sense into her head, it’ll be real quick, we need to leave in two hours at max”

“Darling, this is important, she’s your sister, take as much time as you need”

“She might be my sister, but when I needed her the most, she turned her back to me and ran away with that dude, she doesn’t care about me, she’s just desperate right now”

“I know, baby, I know she messed up pretty badly” he said kissing my forehead “but she might change, and I don’t want you to regret this decision later, don’t rush, it’s okay, we can still go if the snow is not too heavy, and if we can’t...”

“Don’t, we are going, I can’t keep you away from your parents on Christmas, I’m going to make it on time”

“Okay, whatever you need, honey, I’ll be here decorating Harry Potter cookies”

“It’s Christmas cookies!”

“Whatever you say, babygirl”

“Shawn!”

“Yes?”

“It’s Christmas Eve, not Harry Potter day”

“I know, but they look better as wizards” he said and I only rolled my eyes.

“Shawn?”

“Don’t you have a sister to save right now?”

“I do, I just wanted to say that I love you, even though you are making Harry Potter cookies on Christmas”

“I love you too, Y/N, even though you think Santa’s face on a cookie is better than Edwiges’”

“See you later” I said grabbing my purse and my coat and headed out the door.

                                                          -*-

Arriving at my sister’s mansion she was a mess.

Jennifer was always the golden child. She was the pretty one who new how to do a perfect cat eye at age 12, she was the first one to have a boyfriend, but not any boyfriend, the high school prom king and quarterback who looked like a Calvin Klein model. She was also the one who became a model and Instagramer or whatever and people knew for her beauty. But what they didn’t see was how greedy she was and how much she wanted to get married to someone important rather than someone she actually loved. And that only got worse as she grew up.

So when Jen met a CEO in one of the parties she attended, she became a bitch. She would only dress in expensive as hell outfits, go wild partying and becoming a bitch my parents started worrying, but they kept saying it was just a phase. But I was the one who felt it the most, she was my best friend. So when she showed up at home, with the CEO, who was a jerk, saying to everyone she was leaving to actually have a decent life with the love of her life, that broke my parents’ heart. And she stopped calling and actually acted like we never existed.

So actually arriving at the house and seeing her with no makeup, puffy and red eyes, hair a mess and no nail polish was weird. But having her looking at me like I was her salvation was completely odd.

She didn’t try to hug me or whatever, she just smiled at me and kept the space between us there, afraid to being left again I guess. Something she’s really good at, besides looks and stuff, is reading people and knowing how to engage with them, I guess that really helped her become what she is now. We just sat on the couch and that’s when I first saw her actually break in front of me, and that hurt more than I imagined it would.

Their relationship was actually kind of genuine in some aspects, she actually fell for him after a while and he was obviously enchanted by her presence, so they were actually happy. But they were going through a phase and she said she was really mean to him thinking that would make him do what she wanted him to, but he left for a trip with his secretary and told her to chill, that in a week and a half he would be back. But now she’s pregnant.

I tried my best to comfort her but I couldn’t do much, I don’t even know him. But at the end, she was able to see the bright side and actually start laughing. I tried telling her to go to our parents, but she insisted she wasn’t ready.

“You can stay here with me”

“I actually can’t, Jennifer”

“Why? Mom and dad would get it”

“I’m going to my boyfriend’s parents house”

“What?”

“Yeah, I’m dating for a while now, Jennifer”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve met him a while after you left, something like four months, we’ve been together ever since, I actually live with him”

“God, it’s been too long”

“Yeah”

“Y/N, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done it that way, neither treated you like that, I’m so incredibly sorry, I miss you so much, you’re so important to me”

“Jennifer...”

“I know, I know, I’m sorry”

“What do you want from me?”

“I want you back in my life”

“I... can’t do that, at least not now”

“It’s okay, I can give you all the time in the world”

“Okay” I said sighing.

“So... who’s the lucky guy?”

“Hm, his name is Shawn, his one year older than me”

“Nice, that’s nice, is he good to you?”

“He is, he is fantastic actually, I’m the luckiest girl alive”

“He is the lucky one”

“Hm, don’t think so”

“What does he do for a living?”

“He’s a singer”

“A singer? Is he any good?” She asked and I had to stop myself from laughing.

“Yeah, he’s kind of a superstar”

“Really?”

“Jennifer, he’s Shawn Mendes”

“WHAT?! You’re dating Shawn Mendes?”

“For a few years, yeah”

“Holy shit”

“I told you”

“I can’t believe it”

“It’s true though”

“Oh my... wait, your phone’s ringing, is it him?” Jennifer asked.

“Uh? Yeah” I said while I picked it up “hi, baby”

“Hey, princess, everything okay?”

“Yes, I’m actually going home in a few”

“Don’t rush, it’s okay”

“No, but everything’s fine here”

“Okay, baby, I’m waiting, the cookies look fantastic”

“Oh, I’m sure they do, you’re amazing at decorating Harry Potter themed cookies on Christmas”

“I know, gotta go, mom’s calling, love you”

“Love you too, bye”

“You two are...”

“Don’t”

“Okay, Sorry”

“S’Okay, anyways, I gotta go, he’s waiting”

“Oh, sure, go home to your superstar”

“I am” I said getting up and grabbing my stuff “bye, Jennifer, I’m going away for the night, but tomorrow after lunch I might be back if you need anything”

“Okay, thank you, Y/N, I’m sorry and Thank you for coming, it means the world to me”

“It’s okay, I wouldn’t leave you like this”

“Thank you, sis, merry Christmas”

“Merry Christmas” I said as I left.

                                                          -*-

If one more thing goes wrong I’m freaking out.

Leaving my sister’s house, there was a big accident, which made traffic unbearable and I couldn’t do much about it, other than wait obviously. So I got home an hour later than what I told Shawn I would be, and I couldn’t warn him because my phone died. So when I arrived home, I already had a plan on how we could get to his parents’ place before the storm. But when I walked in and saw him on his Christmas Sweatpants and nothing more my heart sunk in my chest.

“What the hell?! You should be ready! We need to go like now!”

“Hi to you too” Shawn said chuckling “I got worried, you vanished and wouldn’t pick up your phone”

“I’m sorry, there was a really bad car crash”

“Oh, I figured your sister needed more time”

“No, we need to go now if we want to be there”

“Baby, it’s too dangerous to drive now”

“What?”

“I called my mom and explained the situation, she said it was okay and that she would come here to have lunch with us tomorrow if the weather is fine”

“What?” I barely asked, my voice was caught up in my throat.

“Yeah, lets just stay in and relax, I already picked your favorite movie and made dinner... hey, what’s wrong?” He asked coming to hold my face but I took a step back “baby, are you okay?”

“If I’m okay? I’m... I don’t know” I murmured “I... shit, I can’t” I said pacing to our room.

“You can’t what?” He asked before I opened the door to our bedroom.

“I can’t be with you right now”

“Why? Did I do something wrong? Baby... I’m so...”

“Don’t you dare!” his eyes went wide with my harsh tone “that’s the fucking problem, Shawn, you didn’t do anything wrong because you’re fucking perfect. The problem is that I’m a fucking disaster. You literally finally came home after a long tour and I couldn’t do anything I planned to make this the best Christmas we had so far. But I couldn’t pick you up, I had to work, I got late at work and couldn’t take you to your favorite place, I literally spent hours with my sister and I ruined your Christmas Eve celebration with your family because I’m the worst girlfriend on the planet. That’s why I can’t be with you right now, cause I can’t deal with you having to deal with my shit all the time and to swallow the guilt that has been literally eating me up inside, okay? And that’s even worse because you have the biggest lost puppy dog eyes and I just want to punch myself for saying all this to you, specially today, and I’m so terribly, immensely, completely, fucking sorry”

“Y/N?”

“Yes?” I sighed whipping my face with the back of my hand. I didn’t even know I was crying until now.

“You’re not a disaster, all that happened wasn’t your fault and I didn’t care about any of them, baby, you’re perfect, and being with you is better than going to fancy dinners and stuff, eating our weights in sushi is way better”

“But...”

“No buts, it’s the truth. I’m sorry not everything went according to plan, but this is still the best Christmas”

“But everything went wrong”

“No, you’re fine, we cuddled a lot, your work is fine, you got back with your sister, you’re going to be an aunt, you’re with me and that’s all I need, nothing went wrong, they just didn’t go according to your plans, but everything’s perfect” he said gently cupping my cheeks and leaning in to kiss my tear stained cheeks “I love you and that’s all that matters to me right now”

“I love you too, Shawn”

“Good, now turn around, change into your Christmas onesie and come watch Star Wars with me” he said smacking my butt cheek playfully as I turned to enter the room.

When I opened the door my heart stopped.

There were rose petals everywhere, a bunch of candles lit up and a bunch of roses on the bed. But I felt like dying when I turned around to ask what was going on and found Shawn in one knee holding a little velvet box.

“Baby, we’ve met a few years ago in a market at two a.m., I needed some alone time and so did you, me for work reasons and you for family issues. The moment I saw you, carefully picking wine with you hair in a messy bun and wearing only an oversized hoodie I knew I was long gone. We’ve been through a lot due to my crazy life and and even crazier fans, but you’re been there for me every single time I needed you, and I’m so grateful for that. My whole family loves you, and don’t you worry, I never planned on going there, I wanted to be with you and only you, I guess fate decided to help” he added with a little chuckle “I’ve been planning on doing this for a while now, but I’ve never got the guts to. But today, when we were talking about my fantastic cookies I knew for sure I couldn’t wait another day, I needed to grab this ring here from the bottom of one of my guitar cases and go down on my knee for you, cause you are my everything and even more. I couldn’t do anything without you. Remember earlier today when you told me you were the luckiest girl in the world to have me?” He asked and I couldn’t even think straight anymore, so I just nodded “Well, you are incredibly wrong about that. I’m the luckiest human being alive to have you here with me, and I truly couldn’t care last if things didn’t go as planned, you’re all I need and all I’ll ever want for Christmas. So, Y/N Y/L/N will you marry me?” He finally asked opening the box only to reveal the most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen.

I couldn’t even reply, I just fell on my knees and wrapped my arms around his neck nodding, placing my head on the crook of his neck.

“Yes, a million times yes” I whispered feeling his arms holding my tight against his torso, feeling his muscles relax under my touch “I love you so so so so much, Shawn, you have no idea”

“I do, cause I love you more, dummy” he said between giggles, kissing my hair.

I grabbed his face between my hands and kisses him with every cell in my body, grabbing his perfect locks with my hands to make sure he was never going away. He couldn’t stop giggling like a boy as he kissed me, grabbing me by my waist to pull me impossibly closer.

“I love you so much”

                                                          -*-

A few hours and sushis later, I was wrapped up on Shawn in bed, with the Star Wars 6 playing on the background as we kept smiling like idiots as we lazily made out eventually. Our fingers were laced together and he kept twisting the ring on my finger, not believing it. We obviously had to call his parents and also mine, I even texted my sister. This was the best Christmas after all. He’s all I want for Christmas.

                                                           -*-

*Please reblog or like this post if you liked it so I'll know.

*I'm sorry if there are any spelling mistakes, I had to finish this in rush to post it on time.

*Please do not repost this without giving me the credit, this is a completely original piece and I do not give permission to copy this!

*Hope you guys enjoyed it!

*xoxo

-🌙

*Here you go, honey!: @fivefeetapartt​

[mendesstories]

Season of Firsts

Summary- It’s the season of new beginnings around the new Mendes household.

Word Count- 1035

taglist: @mendesficsxbombay (lemme know if you’d like to be added!)

a/n- Just a lil something short and sweet for the season! Hope everyone has a wonderful holiday season!

From chummy get-togethers with the extended family to breaking in with new traditions of their own, it’s been a season of “firsts” around the new Mendes household.

It was their first Christmas as a married couple and the first one in this new home as well. They’d been at it for hours settling things around and decorating for Christmas.

The intoxicating aroma of the clove-studded orange candle she lit up brightens up the long winter night. They were far too late at setting up their Christmas tree but she was adamant that they do it at their own pace but do it beautifully the way she’d dreamed of for years and he was adamant that she got to be happy.

He’s humming along to  ‘Feliz Navidad’ playing on the speakers while putting up his share of the ornaments on their fresh and tall tree. She’s sitting on the floor beside him making a little crib. It wasn’t something his family did but it was a tradition to her. A Christmas without a crib, to her, was almost a sin.

She spent a good hour and a half drawing, cutting, finding art supplies in an attempt to recreate the nativity scene as realistically as she could. She borrowed some brown and blue clay from Aaliyah’s school supplies using it to make a small little well. Using old paper she lined the path to the well with small rocks. She went searching three stores to find fairy lights small enough to fit through the star above and to go around the border of the crib.

He’s always admired her patience and dedication when it came to creating art but this time he’s even more wonderstruck looking at the crib come together and he’s not sure why.

Perhaps because when he looks around he realises this is truly their home in all ways. He recalls when they were on the fifth date they drunkenly joked about having a place like this.

While they may have been joking deep down both of them secretly hoped that it would happen one day.

When he looks around he sees his wife creating something that’s important to her. Possibly starting a new tradition. His heart clenches as he imagines her doing this with their children someday. Teaching them about the significance and meaning. Teaching them to love and appreciate all that they have. He hopes they turn out as kind and loving as her.

This is peak romance he thinks

His eyes land on the kitchen counter. He knows he’s all thumbs in the kitchen but he’s still so excited to bake those fresh cookies with her in the morning and hand them to both sets of parents later on, proudly as though he crafted them from scratch.

Finally, after five years Shawn and her don’t have to figure out ways to split time with both families and each other. Come early tomorrow morning they would all be gathered here.

“Did you get the white chocolate and brown sugar?” She asks breaking him out of his thoughts.

“Yeah, it’s in the kitchen. Why did we need white chocolate though? Aren’t we making regular cookies in the morning?”

“Yeah we’ll make the regular ones before everyone’s here but Aaliyah asked me if we could bake together. So, I thought we’d do those.”

“That should be fun. I already know she’ll be better at it than me.” He jokes.

He knows the younger Mendes has grown closer to her over the past year and a half as she’s gotten older. He’s glad the two of the most important women in his life have an irrevocable bond.

To be fair, he never thought hosting Christmas would involve so much preparation and he wishes he would have taken some notes from his mum all those years she did it. Nevertheless, he’s excited to see how it all pans out.

He hangs the last ornament and moves to crouch down beside her.

She smiles looking at him her eyes bright with excitement, “I’m almost done here. Does it look alright?”

She turns her attention back to the crib sticking down the last of the lights. He doesn’t reply but she continues to feel his gaze on her.

“What happened, bub?” She asks

A grin takes over his face and suddenly it’s like she doesn’t need a response from him anymore. She knows what he’s imagining and thinking.

The little decorations that they had left have now been put on hold. He stands up and puts his palm out to her.

“May I have this dance with you?” He jokes.

“You may indeed!” She laughs putting her smaller palms into his larger ones.

They slow dance to old Christmas music for what feels like a moment frozen in time. She rests her head against his chest and feels his heart beat faster. He whispers something along the lines of how she still manages to do that to him even after all these years. Now his words make her heart race. She takes a deep breath and all her senses are crowded by him.

With the warmth of his body against hers, the chill Toronto breeze outside can’t faze her. The familiar smell of his detergent. The lingering sweet taste of hot chocolate when he lifts her chin pulling her in for a soft and sweet kiss.

She recalls last Christmas, they were walking through a Christmas Market in Toronto, huddling together in attempts to stay warm. Mulled wine and cookies filled their stomachs while good times and laughter filled both their hearts with love and fondness.

She still remembers his rosy cheeks and loud laugh reverberating through her ears when she told him the story of how one Christmas she accidentally opened her older sisters gift from her fiance. She got so excited about the gift, no one had the heart to tell her it wasn’t meant for her. She only found out a few years later.

The clock strikes midnight. It’s Christmas Day. Nothing else matters to them right now apart from soaking in the happiness they bring into each other’s lives.

It’s 00:02 and it’s already the best Christmas they’ve ever had.  

This is peak romance he knows

[lostinshawnsmemory]

A Dash of Bailey’s

My entry for @saintlymendes’ secret Santa fic exchange. Can I just say that I love the idea of a secret Santa.

My secret Santa is @theshawnmendesstorycollection​ who is an amazing writer and person. 💖

Word Count: 1.5k-ish

Warning: Just a really fluffy Christmas fic

“Jules?” Shawn’s voice travelled around the house, he’d woken up to find her side of the bed cold meaning she’d either been out of bed for a while or she never came to bed at all. After looking for her upstairs he went downstairs to see if he could find his girlfriend.

“Julia?” he called again as he looked in the living room and rounded the corner to the kitchen. When he saw her, he stopped dead in his tracks, she was seated at the breakfast nook, resting her elbows on the table and her head on her closed fist. She was asleep.

The next thing he noticed was how messy the kitchen was, there were ingredients everywhere. The Bowls were strewn on every available surface, butter was melting on the countertop, a mysterious power had spilt on the floor and the large kitchen knife was perilously close to falling off the countertop. Before he could say anything, the smell of burning erupted from one of the pans on the stovetop.

“Shit!” he exclaimed, racing over to the stove and turned down the heat where he saw the remnants of bacon sizzling in the frying pan. The sound of his exclamation was what jolted her awake. “What happened?” she said, her voice thick with sleep. “Babe you fell asleep.” Shawn explained coming up behind her and kissing her head.

“Fuck! The bacon!” Almost as if she had flipped a switch, Julia bolted awake and ran towards the stove. “Jules, it’s ok. I turned it off.” Shawn explained as she sat down and put her head in her hands visibly exasperated. “I only closed my eyes for a few seconds I swear.” He could hear the guilt in her voice and was confused as to why she would feel guilty for falling asleep.

“Babe it’s 3 in the morning. I’m not surprised that you fell asleep you were in here for- how long have you been in here? Did you even go to bed at all?” She shook her head as her eyes darted around the kitchen indicating that she had been in there for a while. “I’ve been in here since about 12-ish?”

“You’ve been in here for 3 hours?! Why?”

“Shawn we’ve got family and friends coming over for lunch tomorrow! That’s at least 20 people I have to cook for!” Just the thought of the task at hand overwhelmed her. This was the first time they were hosting people in their new house. When Karen asked if they wanted to, Julia jumped at the chance as it would be the first time in a while that all their family and friends would be in once place and Christmas was the perfect time. What she didn’t consider was how stressful it would be for her to organise. She’d been making lists for a few days and now that it was time to cook, she realised that she might have bitten off more than she could chew. “I still need to defrost the turkey and roast all the vegetables and make the stuffing and-”

“No, what you need to do is go to sleep.” Shawn interjected. There was no way she could do all those things when she hadn’t gotten any sleep. “I can’t sleep right now, there is too much to do.” Julia’s voice came out hoarse as she rubbed her eyes.  

“Babe you need to sleep.” This was one of the few times his voice sounded stern, so Julia knew he wasn’t joking. When she opened her mouth to argue he put a finger to her lips to silence her.  “You can’t get anything done like this and you can’t run on adrenaline for that long, you’ll burn out.” “I guess I can take a nap.” She finally relented. “No, you’re going to go to sleep.” Shawn shook his head clearly displeased with her answer. “Go to sleep, I’ll wake you up tomorrow and we can cook together, well you’ll cook, and I can assist.” He gave her a small smile and set about clearing the kitchen before deciding that he would clean it in the morning.

Julia nodded as she got off the chair she was seated on. She headed towards the stairs before turning around, “Shawn can we have some hot chocolate?” “Of course, we can.” He smiled in response and led them back into the kitchen. He looked around the messy kitchen for a few seconds wishing he had cleared it up when earlier before deciding the best course of action. He cleared one section of the countertop and set out two mugs, cocoa powder and milk. Julia watched as Shawn made hot chocolate for both of them and a smile formed on her face. He looked so… domestic. He wasn’t home as often as she would have liked so seeing him in a setting like this was rare and she would cherish the memory.

While the cocoa mixture was warming in the pot, Shawn walked into the living room and came back with the bottle of Bailey’s that they usually kept at the bar area. “Shawn you can’t put alcohol in hot chocolate!” Julia screeched running over to take the bottle from him. “Sure I can.” He said with a wink, pouring the liqueur into the pot before she could stop him. “A dash of Bailey’s will make it taste amazing. Trust me on this. 

“You know I do.”

When he was finished, he handed Julia her hot chocolate then proceeded to load the dishwasher and tidy the kitchen a little because he knew how stressed she would be if she had to come down to a messy kitchen and he couldn’t have her more stressed than she already was.

After turning off the lights in the kitchen, the two made their way back to their bedroom, where Julia got under the warm duvet. When she was comfortable, she took a sip of her hot chocolate or attempted to. “Shit!” Shawn was at her side faster than she had ever seen him move. “Jules? Babe are you okay?!”

“I think I burned my tongue on this hot chocolate.” She mumbled sticking her tongue out for him to see the way a child would show their mum a scratch for her to inspect. “Do you want me to kiss it better?” Shawn asked a smirk forming. “Maybe.” He answered her request and leaned in to give her a quick kiss “Better?”

“Much.”  

After they finished their hot chocolate, Shawn pulled Julia under the covers and cuddled her from behind. “I know you are stressed but I want you to know that you’re not alone. You will never be alone. Whatever you need from me, I will always be there to help you.”

“I love you Shawn.”

“I love you too Julia.”

——————————————————————————————-

Julia slept till midday and when she woke up Shawn was nowhere to be found. It didn’t take her long to find him as she could hear the clattering in the kitchen from their bedroom. When she got into the kitchen she couldn’t help the gasp that escaped. The kitchen was spotless, Shawn had cleaned every single surface and had run the dishwasher. The countertops sparkled and the whole room smelt faintly of lemon. He looked adorable in his Harvard hoodie and sweats as he pattered around the kitchen with two steaming mugs, and educated guess told her it was coffee, but after inspection, she saw that it was hot chocolate.

Shawn was just about done when he heard Julia’s gasp. He turned around and gave her a warm smile, “Hey Jules.” He walked over to her and gave her a kiss on her head and handed her the hot chocolate he had made.

“You cleaned the kitchen.” She replied as a way of ‘Good Morning’, taking the mug from him. Good Morning to you too.” He chuckled. “And yes, I cleaned the kitchen. I knew you would hate having to cook in an already filthy kitchen and we have a big day planned.”

If Julia could have fallen more in love with Shawn, it would have happened at that moment, he had always shown that he was incredibly considerate and this was no different. She could help herself as she ran towards him and gave him a huge hug, almost slipping in the process. “You really are the perfect boyfriend huh?” She said into his chest.

“I mean, I try.” Was his response.

“And thank you for the hot chocolate.”

“You’re welcome, and it has a secret ingredient.” He had a mischievous glint in his eye and Julia knew exactly what he was talking about. “A dash of Bailey’s?”

“A dash of Bailey’s” he responded with a wink. “Alright finish your drink, we have a Christmas dinner to cook.”

[softboywriting]

All I Want For Christmas | Shawn Mendes

Summary: You and Shawn grew up together, best friends since you were seven years old and you’ve both had it bad for each other for years. It’s finally time for you both to admit how you feel, and what better time than Christmas? [non-au] [christmas fic] 

Word Count: 2.5k

|Masterlist In Bio|

The year you turned thirteen Shawn stole your heart, but he has no idea. How could he? You never told him how you felt, how he is all you think about for 365 days a year, wondering where he is, what he's doing, if he's happy. This year is no different. You don't know why you put yourself through the agony of seeing him once or twice a year, you could just stay home, claim you were sick and try to move on. But part of you doesn't want that. It lives for seeing Shawn, a little glimmer of hope keeps burning deep inside you that one day he will just know. One day he will realize that you're everything he wants and needs.

That day was going to come a lot sooner than you could have guessed.

Christmas morning. You're sat on the big black sofa in the Mendes’ living room, snow is falling outside, the coffee is brewing in the kitchen. Everything screams Christmas. Presents under the giant tree, the mantel and windows decorated in matching white and gold decor. Karen went all out for the holidays and for that you're grateful. Your parents never got really into Christmas, they just didn't think it was that important. You are grateful for the Mendes’ invite to their place for Christmas every year since you were very young. Now you spend Christmas Eve until New Years with them, your parents having moved out of state years ago.

The Mendes’ were your neighbors and you'd grown up with Shawn and Aaliyah, they were like your family, the siblings you never had. Well, that's how it was until you turned thirteen you developed the biggest crush on Shawn. Looking back it's kind of funny. He was a brace faced teenager with skater hair and pierced ears. Kind of a douchebag look but back then you were seriously into it. That doesn't matter though, because Shawn grew out of that phase and into the man he has become now and your feelings haven't changed. If anything they've gotten stronger.

Footsteps creak across the ceiling from the floor above. There's only one person who is big enough to make the floorboards creak. Shawn. Sure enough you hear him coming down the stairs and then he appears at the archway into the small foyer. His hair is mess, he has lines on his face from the weird breathing machine he wore to bed that supposedly helped his vocal cords. His pants are tucked into his socks and his shirt is a wrinkled mess. Wow. Amazing what a multi platinum two time Grammy nominated artist really looks like.

“Hey, what're you up for?” Shawn ask, voice rough with sleep, words slurring ever so slightly.

“Couldn't sleep. It's Christmas y'know, just the jitters of excitement.”

Shawn hums and walks over, flopping on the sofa beside you. He smells like sleep, that rich deep heady boyish scent, and his woodsy spicy cologne but very faded. He slumps against you, fluffy hair in your face as he lays his head on your shoulder.

“Go sleep in your own bed if you're going back to sleep!” You laugh, shoving him upright. The guy is so heavy you can't keep him up as he goes limp against you. The little shit.

“No, you're a much better pillow,” he groans, rubbing his head into your arm. “You smell good too.”

That comment catches you completely off guard. Heat flares in your cheeks, burning you up from your scalp to your neck. You're sure he doesn't meant it in a way other than stating a fact. He couldn't possibly. You're definitely reading too far into it.

“You smell good as well?”

“Liar,” he grins and you can feel his cheek rise against your bicep. “I smell like I haven't showered and I have sleep breath.”

“How would you know? You can't smell yourself.”

Shawn sits up and crosses his arms as he lays against the other arm of the sofa. He looks at you in a way you're sure he shouldn't. A playful smile on his face, eyes alight with mischief. You had been around him long enough to know when he was teasing you. He is such a boy you can't stand it, but you also love it.

“I know what I smell like.”

“Yeah sure.” You roll your eyes. What he was getting at, you have no idea.

“Wanna know what you smell like?”

You laugh. “No? I probably smell like soap, why are we even talking about this?”

It's Shawn's turn to roll his eyes. “You don't smell like just soap. You smell like home.”

You're not sure what to say to that or how to take it really. Was he implying you smelled like his house? Or was your perfume the same as Karen's? What did home smell like? That is so weird but complimentary in a bizarre way.

“What does home smell like exactly?”

Shawn closes his eyes and leans his head back, shifting so his legs stretch out across your lap.  He smiles to himself, Adam's apple bobbing as he finds the words to describe home. “Home smells like warm sugar cookies and vanilla. It smells like apples and mint, a combination of soft and rich warmth.”

“You're just describing my perfume and shampoo, Shawn.”

“I know. Because I'm describing you, and you smell like home.”

“That's weird.”

Shawn sits up, legs still across your lap. “You didn't tell Aaliyah what she told me, did you?”

You shake your head. “What?”

“Aaliyah said you have a crush on me? She said you told her, and that you like my cologne and that you wanted her to tell me so it wouldn't be weird. So you don't have a crush on me?”

You can feel your stomach plunge to your knees. That familiar cold sick feeling washes over you. Aaliyah had a big mouth. You mentioned it once a few months ago, that Shawn was the type of guy you'd like to date and you happened to like his cologne. You never explicitly said that Shawn was someone you had a thing for. Jesus Christ and the little donkey, this was a mess you were not going to talk your way out of.

“It's... complicated.”

“Complicated. Yeah. I get it.”

“Are you being defensive right now?”

Shawn runs a hand through his hair and tugs. “I'm not trying to be. Honestly, it was a huge relief when Aaliyah told me that you had a crush on me because I've always wanted to be more with you too. But like I didn't want it to be weird, and I know you're close with the family and I didn't want to do something wrong and strain your relationship with everyone, because that would be selfish and-” he takes a deep breath and closes his eyes, head in his hands. “I've just fucked up.”

You reach over and lay your hand on his back. It's warm, even through the shirt, you can feel the heat his skin is radiating. It makes you think back to when all three of you camped in their backyard as kids and Shawn kept you warm all night with his back pressed to yours. What you'd give to have that familiar heat again, but in your bed, his arm around your stomach.

“Aaliyah didn't lie, and you haven't fucked up. It's just complicated because of the reasons you listed. I've be so scared of ruining our friendship, my friendship with your family, that is why I never told you how I felt.”

“Do you want to try? I know I'll be gone again come mid January but we've got a week or two to try?”

You rub your hand over his flannel pant leg, sighing softly. What if it didn't work out? You hate to live in fear of the what if's but this was one of those things that you can't come back from. “I don't know Shawn. With your work you can't really keep up a relationship, so why try if we know it's not going to work?”

“You're right. Then why don't we just try being more familiar then? Y'know, to see if we're comfortable with each other.”

“No strings attached? No feelings?”

“I can't promise no feelings, you know I'm one to get attached.”

You roll your eyes. “Okay, fine. We can try being closer, just to see if it's comfortable.”

“Deal.”

_______________

Everyone wakes up shortly after your discussion with Shawn and join the two of you in the living room. It was strange, feeling like you'd finally gotten what you've always wanted, but not really. You have to remind yourself it's temporary, it's no strings attached. Shawn wasn't yours, he couldn't be. The only thing that he belonged to was his music and by proxy, himself.

You try not to over think it as Shawn takes a seat beside you, passing you a mug of black coffee. Everyone said the two of you were crazy for drinking your coffee this way, but you liked it. Creamer made it watery and too sweet. Opening presents goes by in a blur. You're too focused on Shawn's arm around your shoulders, his hand on your leg, his chuckle reverberating through your body when he leaned against you. Every little thing was putting you on edge, breaking your heart over and over until breakfast was being made and everyone dispersed, leaving you and Shawn alone again.

You don't say anything to him as you stand up and head for the guest bedroom. You don't know what to say. How could you tell him the deal was already off? How do you tell him you don't want to be teased even though that's not what he was doing, not purposely. You agreed to this, to be closer, more comfortable with each other. It wasn't even a few hours in and you were falling apart like a snowflake on a warm palm and it was killing you.

“Did I do something wrong?” Shawn asks from the doorway and you glance back. He has his hand on the frame, just barely leaning into the room.

You shake your head from where you're sitting on the bed, turning so your back is to him. “No, it's just me. I'm not feeling well.”

“Liar. Come on, talk to me.”

“No, I'm fine. Really.”

The door clicks closed and the bed sinks under Shawn's weight as he crawls on to it behind you. His hand finds its way up your back and he massages his fingertips against your spine, sending a shiver throughout your whole body. “This is about our agreement isn't it?”

“No.”

“Because I can't do no strings attached either. I'm all or nothing, you know that. And I know my job is demanding and I can't be home all the time, or even half the time really. But I've never wanted something so bad, I just...this...us...it feels right. It feels like if I give up on this now I'm going to lose the only chance I'll ever get.”

Tears stream down your face and you wish you could stop them. You don't want him to see. He would blame himself. You had no idea he was wanting you as long as you'd wanted him. He is right though, this feels like your only chance. Like it's now or never to decide if there was something between the two of you and it's ridiculous to feel that way. You're both only twenty. Your whole lives were ahead of you, why did this feel so dire?

“I don't know what to do,” you sniff.

Shawn shifts, crawling around so he can see you and the moment he does his face falls. He cups your face, thumbs wiping fresh tears as they spill over. He had seen you cry before, countless times. Everything from scraped knees to getting dumped at homecoming. But those tears weren't his fault, he knew how to fix tears that he didn't cause. But right now, looking at you, his broken heart written all over his face, you know he doesn't know how to fix this.

“I'll take some time. I'll tell Andrew I want time off, that I'm overwhelmed. He will understand.” Shawn says softly as he stroke his thumbs back and forth over your splotchy cheeks.

You shake your head as best you can. “You can't take off. You have fans and appearances. You can't just take time off like your job is a regular nine to five. Don't be stupid.”

“It's not stupid. I need to do this.”

“You don't. Your just heart sick, you feel bad for me because I'm crying. You will not cancel appointments and shows for me. I won't let you.”

Shawn slides his hands away from your face and wipes them on the bed. He takes your hands and threads his fingers between yours. His large fingers dwarf yours as he brings them up to kiss. “Just one extra week. I don't have a show until February. January is just a photo shoot and some radio interviews. “

“Shawn, no. I'll just see you when you get home. It's fine, I'm fine.”

“I can't let this go. I just can't.”

“I'm not going to feel different when you leave again. You're still going to have my whole heart. Believe me, if I've lasted the past seven years, I think I can make a it a few more weeks.”

Shawn shakes his head. “I have to listen to my gut. I need to stay here, I just need to. Not just for you but for myself.”

“God, why did Aaliyah have to open her big mouth,” you laugh as you wipe at your tears.

“It was supposed to happen. I like to think everything happens for a reason.”

“Yeah? What's the reason for her spilling my guts? To give me a Christmas heartbreak?”

“No, it's so I can do this.” Shawn wraps his arms around you and hauls you against him. He kisses your cheek and you stare at him, faces inches away. “And this.” He kisses your nose. His lips hover over yours, breath warm and damp. “And this.” He presses his lips to yours sweetly.

Your whole body comes to life, his kiss sending a spark through your veins. Your heart clenches, brain shuts down, body goes lax against him. A soft moan escapes your lips and you feel him smile, teeth against your wet lips for just a brief moment.

“That was a kiss,” you mutter, just barely parted from Shawn, foreheads pressed together. “You kissed me.”

“I did, and I'd like to keep doing it. Will you let me?”

“Tell me this is real. Tell me that this feels right.”

He bumps your nose with his. “It's very real, and I know this is right, that we are right together.”

You look at him, eyes inches from his searching for some sign that this was a dream. “Promise me that you won't change your mind about us.”

Shawn nods, head rocking against yours. “I promise.”

“Okay, you can kiss me again.”

Shawn presses his lips to yours, mouth soft and plush. He takes his time, slowly drawing your lips between his just to release them and go in again. “Thank you,” he mutters between kisses.

“For what?”

“Giving me my only wish this year.”

“Me?”

He nods, forehead resting against your once more. “You.” He captures your mouth for one more kiss as he says, with a smile, “Merry Christmas.”

____________________________

Thank you so much for reading. Please reblog and share! Let me know what you think too! Thank you! -A

[loveturtlesx]

The Christmas Tree

I’m sorry, I was feeling all the things and then this blurb happened. I had no idea that it was going to go where it ultimately went. I hope you enjoy! -xx.

She tossed a box at his dozing figure on the couch. 

“Babe, you said you’d help,” she laughed, tossing another ornament box at him. 

“Hey,” his raspy voice groaned, “I lied”. He moved the boxes to the coffee table, “come ‘ere.”

He extended his arms out for her, slowly blinking his bleary eyes trying to find her figure in the dark room. 

“Give me a sec,” she called still maneuvering the boxes around by the windows. Digging through the storage bins her dad had neatly packed for her, she struggled to find exactly what she wanted. There were two storage bins packed to the brim with Christmas ornaments she had collected everywhere she traveled: Prague, Rome, Vienna, Reykjavik, Copenhagen, Dublin, London, Edinburgh, Athens, Chana, Havana, Barcelona, and many many more. Until this year, she had always decorated her parents’ tree with her enormous collection. This was the first year she was going to be decorating her own tree. It was Shawn and her first Christmas living together and their first tree together. Except, their living room was still bare but for the bins her father sent over —he had been eager to clear space in their attic. 

The problem was that she and Shawn did not see eye to eye about their first tree. So, for the majority of December, her holiday trinkets remained in the bins. Shawn wanted a live tree and to make an occasion out of picking one out with her. She thought it was incredibly sweet, but not at all practical. Plus, the sap and needles were annoying as hell. She wanted an artificial tree, and when she told him that they made quite beautiful realistic ones, he laughed at her. She had no desire to deal with the maintenance of the tree when they were constantly on the move. Neither was home consistently to water the tree. She was often working late and Shawn was traveling at the drop of a hat. He disagreed and believed that they could handle the maintenance. Their arguing went round in circles.

Her things were sentenced to be stuck in the bins for a bit longer when Shawn left last week to do a short promo trip in California meeting up with a few different talk show hosts. He discussed their dilemma live on television. She wanted to murder him for it only because it had yet to be resolved. Both wanted their tree to be special, but struggled to find a happy medium. It didn’t help that now they had fans weighing in on their disagreement. When he got home late last night, they had gotten into a pretty stupid fight about it. Their fight lasted a half hour before they were shedding clothing and arguing horizontally. There were several rounds of “arguments”. They both won in a way, but there was no real resolution. Their living room still was not decorated. This bothered her to no end. Christmas was her favorite holiday and she loved feeling festive. How can you be festive without a tree, artificial or not?

Bothering her immensely, she woke up in the wee hours of the morning and wondered out to her bins in the corner, waiting for a home. She pulled her oversized sweater tighter around her frame as she dug into the box. It was soon after that a sleepy Shawn had followed her out into the living room, missing her presence in bed. He joined her and initially promised to help with the decorations that didn’t need a tree, but fell asleep likely from all the intense “arguing” and travel. 

She sighed when she got to the bottom of the bin and still didn’t see what she was looking for. She left the mess on the floor and walked over to a rumpled looking Shawn. He grabbed her hips and pulled her on top of him. She fell non-too gently. Shawn groaned at the impact. 

“Serves you right,” she said, still feeling a little petty. He settled her more comfortably by spooning her, and then swatted her ass. She smirked, “I’m not in the mood to go another round just yet.” 

She could feel him smile into her hair, “what did you need at,” he picked his head up from her hair and squinted at the clock on the cable box, “4:32 in the morning?” His voice was thick still with sleep and sex. She squirmed back into him enjoying his warmth, she closed her eyes and inhaled loudly through her nose. 

His scent toyed with her, “I was looking for a specific ornament my mom gifted me – the Christmas after we started dating.” 

He didn’t respond, but tightened his arms around her torso. He was quiet for so long that she thought he fell asleep. She was lulled into that place between consciousness and sleep from his deep breaths. 

“Baby,” his raspy voice interrupted the silence of the morning.

“Hm?” She wasn’t ready to be fully awake again.

“I’m sorry.”

“Uh huh,” she didn’t open her eyes or mouth. Slowly his apology settled into her brain and she considered it, “I am too.” She responded keeping her eyes shut, still not wanting to meet the day again just yet.

He kissed her hair, “I love you.” 

Her nose wrinkled picking up on his morning breath, “I love you too, but you smell.” 

His belly shook with laughter waking her more, “you’re such a pain in the ass.”

She laughed with him, and when they settled again, she asked, “what do you want to do about the tree?”

He brought her closer to his body, as if she was a stuffed animal. He buried his face into the back of her neck. She opened her eyes at his actions, waiting for a reply that might start another argument. She had no desire or energy in her left to fight about the tree. She just wanted one, live or artificial, to hang her ornaments on and the few they had collected together.

“Don’t be mad.” Oh fuck, Shawn what did you do? She tensed and held her breath waiting for him to speak again.

“I bought something yesterday, that I was hoping would be a decent compromise.”

“And,” she prompted.

“And I was in a gift shop wasting time before my flight when I saw it.” He stopped.

“And,” she prompted again.

“And I saw these seed packets.”

“You bought a snack as a compromise?” She turned her head to regard him.

He would’ve laughed at her had he not been so earnest and nervous about her reaction, “no, I bought spruce seeds. Like for a spruce tree. And- and it comes with a little pot to plant it in. And I figured, if you wanted, we could grow it. And when we get a house, we can plant it in the yard. Then decorate it for Christmas, outside. No needles or sap inside.”

She turned fully around in his arms and looked into his big hazel eyes. He was trying to read her face. She kept it completely still, and then kissed him soundly on the lips. That one kiss, turned into many more. In between kisses she told him “it’s,” kiss, “fucking,” kiss, “perfect.” Sleep completely gone, and tossed away like their shirts were. Her hands were everywhere. He was undoing the drawstring on her pants, when she froze, “wait, and the tree for the living room?”

“Whatever you want.” 

“No, you have to love it too. Pick it with me.” 

He pressed a loving kiss in between her eyes, and then on her nose, “I don’t think the stores are open right now.” She rolled her eyes at him, and pinched his nipple. 

“Hey!” his eyes darkened and they went back to kissing.

For the second time this morning, she woke in his embrace. His chest was rising and falling steadily in such a soothing manner. She wanted to let it bring her back into a deep sleep, but she wanted to find that ornament. Standing from the couch, she was met with chilly air. She threw on her pajamas and covered Shawn tightly with the blanket. She wandered into the kitchen with her phone and texted her mom. 

iMessage to Mom: Do you still have that ornament you got me? The bauble?

Thankfully her mom was an early riser and replied immediately.

iMessage from Mom: I packed it in with the bins dad brought over.

iMessage to Mom: I’ll look again

She walked back out to the mess she created earlier, and slowly put the things back into the bin, stopping to look through it as she did. Nothing. 

Shawn sighed from his sleep and turned over on the couch. She looked at him and smiled. He was something else. It was then that she noticed the ornament boxes she had tossed at him before. She smiled at herself. How stupid. She sat on the edge of the couch, careful to not jostle her boyfriend. She picked up the ornaments from the table and looked them over. She quietly laughed at her mom’s gag present.

“What do you think about this one?”

“Babe, that’s hideous.” Shawn was eagerly pointing at a bright yellow tree with sparkly streamers woven into the branches.

“But if we’re going artificial, why not go artificial?”

“I hope you’re joking.”

“Babe, I have no idea what you’re talking about. This is great.” She looked at him with a straight face and he looked right back at her. A smile started to work its way onto her face and they both grinned and broke into laughter. 

“Okay, maybe not.” He grabbed her hand as they strolled through the different varieties of trees.

“What about this?”

“No, it kind of looks like it’s tinged blue.”

“Huh, I see what you mean.”

It took two hours, steamy hot chocolate, and countless kisses, but they found the perfect tree. Then it took another hour to purchase and maneuver the tree home, and then assemble it. They sat admiring the naked tree in the corner, residing where the storage bins had been before. It was beautiful and you really couldn’t tell it was a fake. Shawn kissed her temple. She looked up at him and pulled his head down to kiss him soundly. She pulled away and walked over to the mound of ornaments.

“Remember how I was looking for that bauble this morning –from my mom? She gave it to me right after we started dating.” 

“Yeah, you found it?”

“I did!” She walked back over and passed it to him with a laugh. He took the ball and read the elegant script: Mentally Dating Shawn Mendes.

He laughed, “well, your mom was right. You are mental.” She threw the pillow from off the couch at his head. It hit him squarely in the face, and she cackled, dancing away from his arms. He delicately placed the ornament down, and grabbed her by the waist. He tossed her onto the couch and began to tickle every inch of her. They were both in tears and stitches when they had finally calmed down. Cuddling on the couch, they admired the tree. She stood up, new determination setting in. “Let’s decorate it!”

“Give me a second and I’ll help.” Shawn stood and discreetly picked up the bauble from the coffee table. He went into the kitchen and dug around in the junk drawer for a sharpie. He came back into the living room and hung the bauble on the tree.

“Babe, look at the first ornament up!” She put down the bin she had been going through and looked at the bauble. She laughed and then looked closer noticing it had been written on.

Mentally Dating Married to Shawn Mendes ? 

She gasped and covered her mouth. She could feel her eyes start to prickle. She turned around and saw him on one knee behind her with an open ring box. Her eyes went wide, and the tears came.

“I wasn’t planning on doing it this way, but I-I’m going with it. I love how smart you are, how funny, and beautiful you are. You always keep me on my toes. Even when we fight, I know there’s no one else I would rather be arguing with. I—”he paused overwhelmed with emotion “I—I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. You’re my everything…” He was crying and his voice was cracking. She couldn’t see straight through her own tears. “Will you –will you marry me?”

She chuckled, and kneeled down grabbing his hands in her own. She reached over wiping his tears away. And she kissed him. Her hands cradled his head, pouring everything into the kiss, and his hands found her hips pulling her closer and then they wrapped tightly around her body.

[scandinavian-girl]

December 21st.

December 21st 2022

“Shawn?” you called from the kitchen, where you currently had begun, with some of the food for christmas eve.

Shawn came slowly into the kitchen. His eyes went wide, when he saw all the food, you had begun preparing.

“You do know that you are pregnant, and get tired just by walking a few meters?” he said nervously to you.

You nodded. “I know, babe. But do you remember who said ‘yes’ to it was us, who were going to held the christmas dinner?” you said in a harsh way. Because of hormones.

Shawn rolled his eyes. “What do you want me to do?” he said softly and kissed your cheek softly.

“Can you do the…” you stopped and looked around. “Uhm. Can you do these potatoes, while I sit down for a second?” you asked him, with your small voice.

He smiled at you and nodded. “Take a nap honey. You deserve it,” he said caressing your cheek softly.

You leaned into his touch. “Can’t I just watch you cook?” you smiled at him.

He looked at you with soft and flirty eyes. Nodded shortly after.

“It’s been awhile since you’ve cooked something,” you commented out of the blue.

“It’s because I can’t cook like you,” he smiled at you.

You giggled and placed your hand on your face. Such a dork.

It took Shawn quite a while before he was done with those goddamn potatoes.

“Potatoes done!” he said loudly and exciting.

“Also took you like 30 minutes..” you said in a serious tone.

“Hey. Don’t be a sassy girl tonight,” you said as he walked over to you on the barstool.

“It’s just those fucking hormones,” you said looking at his short chest hair and starting to play a little with them.

The rest of december 21st was spend with a few makeout sessions here and there, preparing food and movies.

[shitiwritesometimes]

Home for Christmas (Shawn Fluff)

Summary: Shawn and Y/N go to his home for Christmas for the first time. 

Word count: around 860

Triggers: none

Author’s note: I feel like this might be a little late but I hope you enjoy it anyway!

🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

“Okay, turn for mom’s present,”  Aaliyah said and picked three right red bags from underneath the tree. “There’s one for Shawn, one for Y/N and one for me” she explained while giving him and I one of the bags.

“I wonder what it could be,” Shawn teased his mom. 

“Come on guys just open it!” She hurried us from the sofa.

The three of us opened the bag and took out of it tons of paper that were covering the present. When I finally reached the bottom of the bag I touched the softest fabric ever, grabbed it and pulled it out of the bag. 

"Oh my God!" I smiled. "I love it! Thank you, Karen!"

"You're welcome darling" She smiled back. "Do you like your pyjama, Aaliyah?" 

"Yeah mom, thank you." She stood up from the floor and kissed the woman's cheek. “I wasn’t expecting it at all!

"My mom has been gifting me and Aaliyah pyjamas since I was born" Shawn explained me softly in the ear. "Welcome to the family tradition."

"I like it," I giggled. "Plus I'm sure you look so good in this penguins printed pants."

"Of course I do," he imaginatively hair flipped. 

🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

"Grandma do you remember Y/N?" Shawn put his arm around my waist and walked closer to the lady in the armchair.

"Sure I do!" She stood up and walked toward us and pinched Shawn's left cheek. "We meet in your birthday back in August, didn't we?"

"Yes," he smiled widely. Karen's voice screamed for Shawn's help so he left me there with his grandma.

"I'm happy to see you two are still together," she ran her hand around my arm softly. 

“Well, thank you,” I smiled trying to think of something else to say. “We’re so happy otgheter” 

"I can see how happy you make him."

🎄🎄🎄🎄🎄

The house was finally empty, we had already loaded the dishwasher for the third time that day and the only trace left of the Christmas lunch were some trays with the remainders of the desserts on them. 

"Good night, family," Shawn said to his parents and sister, who were sprawled in the sofas. 

"Good night sweetie, " his mom answered, not looking up from her brand new book. "And good night Y/N."

"Thank you again for having me," I smiled and then looked at Shawn.

He grabbed my hand and after saying good night again he guided me upstairs.

"Shall we?" He asked while raising the pyjamas. 

"We shall" I giggled while trying to unzip my dress. 

"Here let me help you." He walked behind me, put on hand on my waist and unzipped my dress with the other. "Oh my God, you're just so hot."

I giggled and wiggled out of the dress. Then I sat on his bed and started to take off my tights, "want to help with these too?"

"How can you be doing this to me?" He shook his head and stared at me. "You know my parents are downstairs!"

"For God's sake Mendes!" I rolled my eyes, obviously having fun with it. "They are just tights." 

Once they were out I threw them across the room trying to make them land on my open suitcase. Then I put my pyjama on and took off my bra, once the shirt was one because who knows what Shawn could have done if not. 

"My time to watch" I grinned while sitting in his bed. 

He took of his chinos and his shirt and I had a few seconds before he put on the pyjama in which I had the chance of admiring his muscular body. Once dressed he walked to the bed, I moved to leave him space and after he laid I put my arms around his chest."

"Thank you for coming with me," he smiled while softly kissing my forehead. "I know how much you love spending these days with your family."

"And I know the few chances you get of coming home and being with your whole family, so the pleasure is mine." 

"You know you're the first girl I bring home for Christmas?" He put his arms around my waist and pulled me closer. "And also, my grandma adores you,"

"She's just so cute, I'm sure she likes everyone," I shrugged,

"Come on Y/N! After meeting you in August she couldn't stop talking about you for a week!" Shawn chuckled. "The only time she has ever mentioned any of my other exes was to criticize something about them!" 

I blushed softly and kissed him, "I love you."

"Aw, I love you too babe."