#shadowgast fanfic
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FICLET FRIDAY - Little and Lost
Prompt: Glow | Rating: G | CW: none | Word count: 533 | Pairing: Shadowgast
Essek’s knees were dirty.
That is the first thing Caleb noticed. On a normal day such a detail would be worth no mind; they have a garden at this cottage after all, and Essek is rather fond of giving it tender care. However, Essek is usually fastidious about changing from his garden clothes before winding up the stairs and through the hall into the library by the bedroom. No dirt should be tracked from door to bed, as Essek had phrased himself, and usually the worst of the green thumb is left in the laundry basket downstairs for this exact purpose.
But today Essek’s knees are stained, and hovering a good five inches higher than they should.
“Caleb, you must come!” Essek’s eyes and voice are sunbright, rushing into the library to float before Caleb. “You must see!”
“Schatz, what–” He glances around for an adequate bookmark, and finding nothing proper, just picks up the cat on his lap with one arm, the book with the other, then sets the cat onto the open book on his still-warm chair. A fluffy tail is a fine bookmark in a pinch.
Essek grabs his hand. “There is something very strange, but intriguing. I’m not sure, but maybe you know? I hope it hasn’t moved while I’ve been here, I came quickly but without observation there is no telling how fast it moves.”
Caleb feels his hand being tugged down the hall and stairs. “I am right behind you schatz.” He laughs to himself, almost jogging through his own house to follow the bounce of Essek’s sudden jubilant mood.
Once outside, Essek drops his hand and sinks to kneel in the dirt near one of the bushes along the edge of the path. He looks to Caleb over his shoulder and Caleb falls in love all over again.
“Look.” He whispers, hands slow even without the aid of dunamancy, gently parting the branches to peer deeper inside. “What is that?”
Caleb sighs looking at his soft lounging trousers, and gets to his knees anyways. That’s what prestidigitation magic is for. “What should I be looking for?”
Even as the words leave his lips he sees it: there is a gentle glow, like a moonray trapped in the green clutches of the inner bush, shining only as far as the thick leaves allow. He squints to focus, and can just spot the small form sitting on the branch.
“It looks like a glow worm, but surely not?” Essek asks.
Caleb lets out a soft exhale. “It certainly looks like one, but here? Surely not.” He repeats.
“Perhaps he is very lost.” Essek says, voice still and soft. “Perhaps he cannot find his home.”
Caleb can’t help but look away from the marvel and towards another. “Essek.” There are layers to the single word. He does not know, but can guess at Essek’s thoughts.
Essek seems to sense the shift in tone. “Do not worry Caleb, I won’t adopt this one.”
“You said that for the last three cats.” Caleb knocks fondly against Essek’s shoulder, imitating a cat himself.
“We don’t have a terrarium.” Essek replies with a frown.
“As if that has ever stopped you.” Caleb smiles.
#shadowgast#critical role#mighty Nein fic#shadowgast fanfic#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#Caleb Essek fanfic#my fic#short and sweet!
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Reports chapter 6: The Beach Episode 🌊☀️🏝️🐚
#shadowgast fic#shadowgast#writing tag#mighty nein fanfic#shadowgast fanfic#essek thelyss#art by brooke as always!#fic tag#critical role fanfiction#caleb widogast#tm9 fic#critical role#the mighty nein
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As time went on Essek looked more and more forward to his meetings with Caleb. As it was he could only drop his disguises in very rural west and south areas and with the Nein and the whole thing got more exhausting all the time. Plus, Caleb was making such quick progress with his studies, chatting only got more interesting with each visit.
He was also pretty sure it was normal to miss one’s partner, but such romantic thoughts flustered him too much to think on so early in the afternoon. That train of thought was for once Caleb and him have gone through a whole bottle of wine.
“Professor Widogast?” Knocking on the door with his most neutral accent. He was Halsunn Deeproot today, a forest elf who did magical research. One of his partner’s favorite aliases.
“Ah, come in, Deeproot!”
And so he went in, senses immediately assaulted by the smell of cooking meats and veggies. Ah, so they were eating in tonight. Appreciated, since their latest separation had been especially long. The drow dropped his disguise as he drifted into the kitchen to the grin on of ridiculous human partner.
“Awh, putting Halsunn away already? But he’s such a looker.”
“Don’t tease me, young man, I’m of no mood for it.” He complained with no malice as he finally reached his destination and got to give Caleb a peck on the lips, getting a quick glance at whatever he was cooking before it was covered with a lid. “That looks… different.”
Caleb and Essek were not cooks, but they had been gradually improving now that they had to fend for themselves as full adults. That said, the list of things either of them could cook consistently good was short. Both could do the easiest of soups and some stews, Caleb knew how to do basics roasts and sides and he knew some very simple baking. This didn’t stop either of them from trying something more complex, wizard hubris and all. Whatever his ginger had in that deep pan wasn’t one of the roasts the human whipped out when he had the coin and wanted to impress. There was twine and toothpicks. The drow really hoped that he wasn’t going to spend his first night of this visit choking down something inedible, but it would be fair turnaround for those awful plum cookies Essek had made two visits back.
“Don’t worry, I practiced this one a bit. I wanted to do something nice to surprise you. Do you know what a few days ago was?”
Fucks sake, he’d forgotten something. What did he miss? An anniversary, surely, but he couldn’t…
“I- I’m sorry, I don’t…”
“Don’t worry, I forgot too, until it’d passed. Four days ago was the third anniversary of the day we met. It’s not something most people remember, or even celebrate, so don’t worry, it’s just- I remembered and wanted to make you a little treat.” Caleb glanced at some sand dials he had set up. The drow noticed more covered pots. Steaming something, maybe?
“You don’t have to go so out of the way.”
“I want to, though, and I will.”
“But of course.”
“Now-“ Another, slightly longer kiss and a soft smile with blue eyes that took his thoughts away more often than not. “Why don’t you go wash up a bit, hm? You smell like a beast of burden. Dinner should be ready by the time you’re done.”
“Bold words from the man who smells like ox mating season.” Essek was eternally glad that his complexion was too dark for blushes to show at the teasing. Also hypocritical since the cologne Caleb smothered himself instead of bathing regularly smelt like animal musk and the vague concept of a forest. “But yes, I think I will.”
He tended to take long bathes whenever he had the luxury of time to do so, so by the time he was clean and had his hair done (he would sooner die then have Caleb seen him without his curl cream in.) dinner was being put on the table.
“Just in time, darling.”
“Well time is one of my specialties.” The statement was something of a flirt or inside joke now-a-days, and got the soft smile he was looking for as a response. He gave him a quick peck on the lips and looked down at Dinner. “Caleb, did you make a roulade?”
“I did.” And he looked so proud of himself, too, but Essek kept looking and as further realization came to him. “But that’s not all, I’m sure you’ve noticed.”
The meat roulades, sliced not too thick, not too thin, was served with rice and what was distinctly Xhorasian steamed veggies.
“This meal is very xhorasian inspired.”
“I figured you might be a bit home sick and the market in Rosohna was just a teleport away.” They sat down to eat, Essek much slower as he tried to process this gift.
“You went through all that trouble…”
“It wasn’t any trouble at all, so don’t worry about it and eat up, Liebling.”
And so Essek took his first bite (with chopsticks, even!!! Caleb was using a fork but he’d remembered Essek’s utensil preference, the darling man), a fair chunk of meat, filling, and rice.
And promptly burst into tears.
“Oh Schiess, is it that bad? I practiced the technique, but this is the first time with the marinade-“ Caleb, his darling starshine Caleb, started to lean over and fuss. The drow shook his head quickly to try and assure him, to try and get himself together. But he was having a hard time because-
Because Caleb had made *rat*. Giant Rat, had to be. Now in his den, they had mostly livestock and great beasts, their days of having to eating rats like the common folk was centuries past, but one couldn’t deny themselves a little comfort food every once in a while, could they? And what was more comforting and simple to creature of the Underdark than some well cooked rat? This rat dish reminded him starkly of something that his mother had ordered the chefs make when he’d recovered from an awful fever in his… twelfth year, maybe? Something hardy and comforting after he’d been sweating and puking for days to bring him back to health. A rare kindness from his mother and warm memory- and there the tears went again. Lights above, he was a mess.
“Wh- Where did you source the rat? It tastes fresh.” Essek was doing his level best to act like there weren’t thick crocodile tears on his face. His partner blinked at him in open bewilderment.
“I… killed it this morning, down in an abandoned part of the academy. I used the silver it earned me to buy the veggies. Is- is this because of the rat? It’s the most exotic meat I could find short notice-“ A Fresh Hunt!!! It was like Caleb had read his primary school journals from before he found out he didn’t like people and such.
“And you used plum wine in- in the marinade, yes?” He pushed forward, adamant to ignore the crying that was happening. Gods, it had been far too long since he had something that tasted like *home*. “Goes well with the nut and date filling- really cuts the gaminess of the- the rat.”
“So, we are ignoring the tears. Ja, alright.” Caleb seemed to resign himself to this reality quickly. This wasn’t the first time Essek had clammed up about something because feeling were embarrassing, and he knew he’d be told eventually. “Yes, I got recommended a good brand to use by Yasha and Beauregard, so we gave them to thank for that. Do you enjoy the bits of pan fried mushroom in the rice?”
“Yes.” Even though they were slightly over, a bit tough, just the thought was so sweet and so homey.
He had such a wonderful partner.
#critical role#cr2#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#shadowgast#critical role fanfic#fanfiction#fanfic#shadowgast fanfic#fluffy#Let Essek Be a Drow That Eats Weird Shit#Essek food agenda continued#cr2 fanfiction
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wip wednesday!!! ive been sitting on this dialogue for like FOUR MONTHS, carrying my notes for it across several files, so im very glad to have this scene finally fucking written
from COPING SKILLS, as per usual. hopefully will have this section done and posted innnn a week and a half???
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It's—perfect. It's perfectly perfect, exactly the way Essek would wish to spend a lazy Da'leysen even if the thought that he could had never occurred to him.
It's better when Caleb buries himself deep into Essek, holding there as he catches his breath before melting over top of Essek. Essek thinks maybe Caleb—but no, Caleb sighs, "I simply cannot keep up with you."
"You're doing spectacular," Essek tells him. "I can barely keep up too."
Caleb laughs and shifts and Essek thinks for a moment that he intends to get off him so he relaxes the hold he has on Caleb's shoulders. Instead, Caleb settles, comfortably pinning Essek with his full weight. The feel of him on Essek makes Essek's cock twitch, begging for attention after so long ignored.
"I'm too old to marathon like this. What made us think this was a good idea?"
It's Essek's turn to laugh, the sound sliding into a moan muffled against Caleb's neck when Caleb's cock twitches in him in turn.
"Because I'm a fucking idiot," Essek tells him. "We are not doing this again, don't let me even if I really want to." He pauses, noting for the first time the extent of his bone-weary exhaustion, and sniffs before adding, "I will require two-to-five business days' notice before any and all extra curricular activities going forward. We will have a schedule if only so I don't fuck myself into oblivion."
The feel of Caleb laughing so much while still so deep and so hard within Essek is—good, beyond good, absolutely incredible. Essek rides it out, biting his lip at the feel of Caleb's laughter within him, holding tight to Caleb's shoulders.
"Is that a promise or a threat?" Caleb asks through his laughter.
Essek considers his response, prefacing it with a small, haughty noise, simply saying, "Yes," and Caleb is overcome with a fresh wave of laughter.
Essek hides his soppy smile against the curve of Caleb's neck, so very pleased to have made this man, this beautiful, wonderful man, laugh so hard, and in the middle of sex too. It is, again, not something he would have wanted to have, but now that he has it, he holds it dear.
Adeen would never have allowed himself such fun, and Essek finds himself better off for it.
Caleb pulls back, grinning as he says, "Ja, well, I suppose I will ensure I file the appropriate forms going forward." He can barely get the sentence out before he's laughing again, forehead against Essek's.
"You'd better," Essek says, tipping his chin up to kiss Caleb's smiling lips. Caleb kisses him back readily, over and over, each one broken by the grins that infect both of them.
#mochi rambles#mochi fic#mochi presents coping skills#wipsnip#shadowgast#shadowgast fic#shadowgast fanfic#shadowgast fanfiction#naughty nein#criticallynsfw#essek thelyss#caleb widogast
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Hands to Myself (Can't Keep My)
Rating: Teen
Tags: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast, Essek Thelyss, Caleb Widogast, Established Relationship, Developing Relationship, Fluff, Demisexual Essek Thelyss, Glove Kink, Hair Braiding, Hair Brushing, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, the nein stay together and essek travels with them, no beta we die like Molly, POV Essek Thelyss, Essek has A Thing for Caleb's body hair, First Kiss
Description: Essek explores his new and confusing feelings toward initimacy - in regards to one wizard, in particular
#shadowgast#shadowgast fanfic#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#caleb x essek#essek x caleb#critical role#critial role campaign 2#cr c2#the mighty nein
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#critical role#cr fanfiction#critical role fanfiction#fanfic#ao3#critical role fanfic#shadowgast#caleb x essek#shadowgast fanfic
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Gravity, and all that’s born within illustrations
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I had the honor of collaborating with the wonderful @talesofsymphoniac for her bookbinding project! This is a series of illustrations I drew for @sky-scribbles’s fic, I may have mentioned this fic once or thrice :)
A fan book of a fanfic which inspired fanart, being a part of this project is sort of my love letter to fan creation in general. Seriously, fan creators, you rock.
#critical role fanart#critical role fanfic#fanart for fanfic#fic rec#critical role#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#shadowgast#veth brenatto#tbh I was reluctant to even tag this as cr because it feels like this was powered by fans alone
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Caleb kisses him deeply and Essek sighs, luxuriates like a cat in a patch of sunlight. He trails his fingers idly through Caleb’s hair as it tumbles around his shoulders.
"Caleb Widogast," he sighs as Caleb pulls back to press their foreheads together.
But there's a pinch between Caleb’s brows, so Essek stops. Waits.
"Could you . . . Liebling--"
Essek quiets him with a gentle press of lips against lips.
"Of course," he says softly. "Bren."
Bren's breath hitches, then he sighs. The shape of the name still fits oddly in Essek’s mouth, but he feels the weight of it keenly, heart swelling at being entrusted with it.
"Bren," Essek says again, kissing Bren's cheek. "Bren." His brow. "Bren." His nose. Bren's eyes are shut tight but he leans into Essek's touch.
"Bren," he murmurs, and this time Bren surges forward to meet him, insistent and familiar.
Essek loves this man, every part of him. And he is so grateful to know and be known.
#cr spoilers#critical role#shadowgast#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#there's so much weight in names for both of them#this choice just has so many layers#cr fanfic
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“That is not important right now. I will tell you later,” he strokes a thumb across Essek’s cheek, guiding his gaze up towards him. Essek’s eyes swim with dozens of emotions, too plentiful to categorize and name, and Caleb lays a kiss on his brow. “What matters is that you are alright, mein Stern.” The breath Essek draws in is shuddering as he ducks out of Caleb’s grasp to hide his face in his shoulder. “I am here and not manacled in the Dungeon of Penance,” he bites out and Caleb recognizes the iron layers he’s thrown over his voice to disguise how truly shaken he is. “I am perfectly fine, Caleb.” After the events in Vasselheim, Caleb and Essek have a proper reunion and discuss what happened and how it might shape the future.
Hello friends! Now that I am out of the sleep deprived pit that the C3 finale left me in, I have some post-finale wizards for you all! They are soft, they are tired, and they have so so many emotions. I hope you enjoy! 💜💜💜💜
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Chapters: 8/8
Summary: Things have changed. Irrefutably. Essek has embarked on a new path somehow found in the tangled threads of possibility. And they have made it here together.
(This series installment can be read as a standalone fic with Essek and Caleb being a developing relationship.)
Happy shadowgast saturday everyone <3 thank you to all who have followed along my journey to complete this fic, it is Done. The last chapter has been posted and I truly hope you enjoy it. If you need a fic summary before diving into reading the last chapter, I am working on something to help! but I think you can reread the last paragraphs of chapter 7 and be well set up for chapter 8 :)
#shadowgast#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#shadowgast fanfic#mighty nein fic#critical role#shadowgast fic#the mighty nein#my fic
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Action galore! Wizards blowing each other up! RAW-fuddlery! This chapter has it all, folks!
#was this supposed to be the last chapter? don't worry about it!#shadowgast fanfiction#shadowgast fanfic#tm9 fanfic#critical role fantiction#cr fic#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#critical role#shadowgast#tm9 fic#fanfic tag#writing tag
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The Bone That Has No Marrow
[find it on ao3 here]
Words: 28k | Rating: T | Shadowgast
One moment makes all the difference during the battle at Blumenthal. In the aftermath, the Nein grapple with what comes next.
Featuring:
✨ A twist on Echoes of the Solstice ✨ Mighty Nein-typical emotional regulation and processing ✨ Angst with a happy ending
Header Image: Page 187 of "The Half Hour Library of Travel, Nature and Science for young readers" (1896) courtesy of the British Library's online collection here
#the wizards are going through it in this one#critical role#shadowgast#mighty nein echoes of the solstice#hey did you know i write fic?#i do! just so slowly#two years into this fandom and finally publishing something#august writes#m9 solstice#cr fanfic
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iiits wip wednesday and while i haven't written anything in A BIT i also haven't posted a wip in a bit so like, here ya go. its not smutty???? (wild)
an excerpt from the next chapter of my epic length shadowgast bdsm au COPING SKILLS
--
He can just hear his washer start as he steps back out into his living room. Between his sheets and his casual clothing, she'll be around most of the afternoon tending to his laundry, but she doesn't need to run three loads. He startles her again when he knocks on the door frame of his laundry room, his afghan trailing to the floor from his hand.
"Room for one more?" he asks, gesturing with the blanket.
"Only if you promise to not give me any more heart attacks today, Essek bey," she replies, voice firm despite her smile. She takes the blanket he offers and packs it in with the rest of his bedding, then drops the lid to the machine with a clang.
Essek steps out of her way, his back towards his front door, and gestures with his cane. She shuffles past, dusting her hands off as she returns to her caddy of supplies.
"You do not get to hover either, Essek bey," she adds. "You know I do good work."
"I do indeed," he tells her, and he's not hovering, he just—
Has mommy issues, and Mihra has done much for his private little household over the last fifteen-odd years she's been in his employ. They don't often engage face to face anymore, but he's still fond of her, and he's still—out of sorts from the day before, in need of care and attention that Caleb isn't around to give.
He can let her work though, even if he misses the warmth of his afghan when he sits back on his horrible couch. He doesn't fidget either, prestidigitating his sticky mug clean before slurping at his coffee. It's—cold, which he should have expected, and it only manages to make Essek miss Caleb more.
He has entirely too many tasks to complete and no where near enough brainpower to complete them. He's—antsy with Mihra puttering around his condo with him, too aware of her presence, too aware of the signs of his weekend activities. She won't gossip, probably, but—Light, there is a condom in his bed side bin. Essek doesn't regret Caleb, absolutely not, but he does regret everything else leading up to this, to him being—perceived as anything but Shadowhand Thelyss.
And it's only bound to be worse as the gala approaches.
Mihra hums as she sprays down his bathroom with cleaner, sharp fake citrus that stings Essek's nose. He—starts by retrieving his phone, reviewing his notifications by rote memory until he, at last, reaches the newest messages from Caleb. It's simple, two texts not even a minute apart, sent shortly after seven this morning.
Caleb Good morning, Schatz.
Caleb I shall miss you today. Rest well.
Essek's heart races, enamoured with such a simple thing. His reply takes no thought to write, and he sends it without so much as a cursory review.
Essek I've missed you since you left last night.
As expected, he doesn't get an immediate reply. He's still disappointed and… perhaps he should tell Caleb how affected he still is. It's not subdrop; he doesn't get that far, especially not considering the amount of care Caleb had given him through out their day. It's more that he—
He's simply wildly in love with the man, and that's worse.
#mochi rambles#mochi fic#mochi presents coping skills#shadowgast#shadowgast fanfic#shadowgast fic#shadowgast fanfiction#caleb widogast#essek thelyss#wipsnip#wip wednesday
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Finished a shadowgast fic - thought of a solution to the Lifespan Issue that I personally haven't seen before :D
Description:
Around 150 years after the end of the campaign, Essek starts hearing Jester's voice in his head But that's impossible. After all, Jester died almost half a century ago... (I couldn't think of a way to fit Caleb into the description but this is a shadowgast fic trust me)
#shadowgast#shadowgast fanfic#essek thelyss#caleb widogast#jester lavorre#jesties#caleb x essek#essek x caleb#ao3#writers of tumblr#writeblr#critcal role#critcal role c2#the mighty nein#cr c2#critcal role campaign 2
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“His name is Bren and he is very intelligent.”
I… don’t know what to do with this information? There is something here and I—
Like, I get wanting to be quiet about names, but how did they decide to use Bren for Caleb???
#my brain is trying to understand this choice but the implications are too much#MATT TELL ME YOUR POST CAMPAIGN SHADOWGAST FANFICS#cr spoilers#critical role#shadowgast#essek thelyss#caleb widogast
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platinum
→ AO3
They lie together in bed, limbs intertwined and bodies warm. Stray beams of fading sunlight fall into the room through the half-closed curtains, gently kissing their skin. The air is still around them with undisturbed peace, the last whisper of a day coming to a close.
Essek shifts slightly under the covers with a soft noise. His arms tighten around Caleb as he takes a slow, deep breath. His eyes are closed, sharp features softened with uncontrived bliss and Caleb can’t help but smile at the sight.
He rests his head on Essek’s shoulder, one finger reaching out to trail over the drow’s collarbone with no real hurry or purpose. He travels the expanse of Essek’s skin like he has so many times before, absentmindedly tracing protective runes along the way as he goes upward and hears Essek sigh softly above him. Caleb stops for a moment at the hollow of his throat, caressing the spot where he feels the pulse of a heartbeat beneath, then drags his finger down.
He knows Essek’s every scar, freckle and blemish as if they were his own, yet it still startles him somewhat when he brushes against the smooth, puckered patch of skin on Essek’s sternum.
Memory flashes in his mind suddenly, intense and disorienting. The earsplitting roar, the sound of splintering bone, Essek’s wheezing gasps, the slick blood bubbling under his frantic fingers and seeping into the cracks of the icy ground beneath them, the suffocating fear.
Caleb blinks, shaky breaths escaping his lips as a shudder begins to build at the base of his skull. He draws his hand back, curling his fingers, and buries his head in Essek’s shoulder. The body beneath him shifts again with a quiet sigh. Lips graze the top of his head.
“I’m okay. We’re okay, Caleb.”
Caleb exhales slowly, letting Essek’s whispered words settle his bones and his treacherous mind. The memory fades like a veiled dream, leaving only the warmth of Essek’s skin against his. With a steady breath, he looks up to meet Essek’s violet eyes, which gaze at him so full of love. The ends of his mussed white hair are backlit in the dim sunlight, like pearlized silver. A soft, airy smile is etched on his lips, the kind whose existence is known only to Caleb.
Here is Caleb’s greatest love, his strength, his peace of heart. There is no greater treasure than this.
Essek pulls away from him gently and turns to lay on his side, one hand under his head, facing Caleb. They gaze into each other’s eyes, blanketed in comfortable silence. Slowly, Caleb’s fingers brush the jagged scar marring Essek’s chest and feel the heartbeat within. With a small smile, Essek takes Caleb’s hand in his and presses it close to his heart. He doesn’t let go. No words pass between them. No words need to.
The day slowly gives way to night as they stay like this, taking simple comfort in each other’s presence. Finally, Caleb closes his eyes, his hand still holding Essek’s and feeling at peace once more. Essek follows soon after, letting the weight of true sleep take him, knowing full well he’ll wake up in Caleb’s arms in the morning.
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