#seriously though am i being abducted by aliens rn
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god ok trying to re-download the mobile app while it simultaneously tries to snipe my phone AND there are scary sounds and flashes of light outside my window GOD. life is so hard for gay people.
#seriously though am i being abducted by aliens rn#also tumblr mobile y do u hate me#i was so good to you for the literal years i ahd u on my phone#ur mad bc what?? bc i deleted u out of fear and anguish?? grow up.#anyways anways#oh im gay btw#if u cldnt tell from the CRINGE hannibal POSTING god. GOD.
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What the fuck has this week been? ‘Cause really, it was shit...
Monday: heard from the last person I want to speak with
Tuesday: found out my dad’s work is getting rid of his position later this year
Wednesday: while driving, saw one of the dumbasses who tormented me senior year and I was legit scared for a sec that he was going to try and ram my car or something dumb like that
Thursday: ...actually decent but I still procrastinated too much and was nearly late for work
Friday: finally got a text back from the light of my life! ...And damn near ended up calling the suicide hotline because I never thought I’d live this long and I don’t know what to do with myself even though I’m signed up for school (and I exist in this weird grey area between wishing I didn’t exist but not wanting to kill myself either... but my intrusive thoughts were bad today and I wanted to be on the safe side)
#i am so fucking tired#also if anyone has good recs for loan companies PLEASE let me know#i already know to avoid fannie mae/ navient#i have no fucking clue when my first payment is due but i need to figure this shit out#it was originally supposed to be today (w/ a thirty day grace period)#but then off-campus people are supposed to get a revised billing statement on the 25th? idk wtf's going on anymore#that last part was mentioned once and hasn't been mentioned since so i legit don't fucking know#can't do shit this weekend either way since the parent who would cosign my shit is gone rn#i seriously want to cry though how the fuck did my life end up here#i hate this grey area between wanting to exist or not exist and being fine but not being fine#i'm so tired of this existence#if there are any aliens out there reading this for some reason i give you full consent to abduct me#i'm dead serious
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